Financial Audit - Stupidest Guy I've Ever Met | Financial Audit

Episode Date: February 22, 2024

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Hey, this is Miles. I'm 23, based out of Austin, and this is financial audit. 23. Okay. You're younger than I thought you were. So what do you do for a living? I do field auditing. So I work with banks of different sorts, and I go out to wherever they have their finances or wherever they're loaning money to, making sure that the places that they're loaning money to still keeps that money where they say they are. How much do you make? Probably about 3 to 4,000 a month. well is it three or four thousand dollars a month uh it varies depending on the gap oh so you're hourly uh it's piece rate so i get uh base rate so it's $25 base rate sure and then i get per unit and then i can bid on top of that for mileage or additional time is that what hit your account or is that before taxes uh before taxes so what hits your account on average on a monthly basis

uh it's 1099 so that amount what 1099 oh biweekly it's 1099 so i no but how oh Oh, oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh, my gosh. Subcontractor. Yeah, no, I got you. I think I'm tired. I'm sorry. Okay, are you setting 30% aside for taxes? Yeah, kind of. Yeah, the kind of is pulling some heavy weight because I don't see it anywhere. Yeah, I try to. Do you try to? Do you do it or do you not? I've been a 1099 for four years. I usually use my income from January to my,

March to save up enough to get to my $4,000. $4,000 is what you've owed these last couple years? Yeah, just about. After a lot of write-offs. Why do you do it that way versus setting aside on a monthly basis just to make sure you you're secure? What if you lose a job? Yeah.

That's a great question. But you have to pay for all the taxes that came before. What are you going to do? Yeah, I've always done it that way. So I never really knew another way to do it. And you said January to March, right? Yeah. Okay.

Where is that money now? currently being built up from like zero yeah yeah basically we're halfway through that January to March yeah yeah so that's certainly something to laugh at

I mean I would be freaking out taxes are due yeah do IRS likes their money like a month and a half or so okay so you sir are an interesting creature you

we had phone calls with you I didn't but my casting people did And they were a little confused because love the little conversations. I'm getting my life together. Things are going well. I'm budgeting. Things are getting better. And I'm working hard.

Then we have your documents. Your documents got sent. Your documents are right here in front of me. I know your percentages that are being spent. By the way, 9% went to debt payments but going out to eat was 16%. Yeah. So why did you tell us that you were doing well when everything in front of, Unless do you not know what doing well means?

Do you not know what budgeting means? Do you not accurately budget? I don't think I accurately budget because I do it all mentally. Okay. Well, obviously that doesn't work. Yeah. And it's not been working. I've always been wanting to put towards credit cards and then I get towards my time to pay them.

And there's like nothing left to. So mental budgeting doesn't work, right? No. What are we doing? Something doesn't work. Stop doing it. And probably figure out something better? How long have you been mentally budgeting?

Oh, the four years I've been doing 1099. Okay. Why not in those four years have you evolved beyond the thing you know doesn't work and do something that works? I was making a lot of money before I moved to Austin. So I always had a lot of huge cushion to where it never really impacted my funding or my finances whatsoever. Was the cushion the future income that came from the job? Or you're talking about a safety net and savings that you had on the side? So I had about 30,000 saved up for a long time.

Like I did the six-month pillow that people always told me about. And once I had that, I never really worried about finances. I was always like, well, if everything goes to shit, I'm good. Where'd that go? So. You have 2,300 in savings, including your investment portfolio, which is nothing. Nothing, yeah. So I was making like 10 to 12,000 a month in Pennsylvania, which was great money.

I was every weekend I was traveling to a different city and just partying. I was spending probably like eight or nine thousand a month on just partying because I had the money. How are you? Okay. And then everything else after the end of the month, because my, especially my living expenses in Pennsylvania were less than $1,000. Why haven't that job? Why are you down here? So when I moved here, the job was promised to me. The job was like, oh, we already have it. Everything lined up or ready to go. The same job, but down here?

Yeah. So I moved down here with that. kind of promise. I got here. A couple weeks went by. Nothing really happened with that. And then a couple more weeks by, nothing happened. And then it just kind of devolved into spending that safety pillow.

No. Because every couple weeks, he'd be like, oh, dude, we signed these new contracts. We're doing all this. We're doing all that. So I kind of, and I was with that company for two and a half, three years. So I had a lot of faith in them. And then it just never came to anything. So about January, my safety pillow was zero.

I went from 30,000 in August to zero in like early January. Okay, that's a long time. Wait, didn't you try to go get any other job that wasn't this job that was promised to you? Because I think after a month of being promised a job and I haven't started the job, I'm probably starting to look for another job in preparation for them to continue being a... Yeah, I kind of just was like, it was a friend as well. so I kind of just kept holding out hope that it would come through. Why didn't you go back?

To Pennsylvania? So it was in the housing markets. I was doing house inspections. After the housing market kind of crashed, he lost a job as well, kind of. So he started having to cut people out of the job completely, and he started taking over territories that were other people's territories, so he could kind of cut funds in the business. And you would have been cut?

I might have been cut. I'm not 100% sure, but I knew he was struggling. He just never told me that until literally like a month ago. That like the business is almost completely gone. When did you get the job you have now? I got this job in March, March of last year. So there's $2,000 in savings. You need to double it to pay your taxes, hopefully the amount that you actually need.

But then what happens to your savings? You have nothing. What happens if you lose your job? Yeah, I don't have a plan for that right now at all. I've always believed that access to high quality data and analytics shouldn't have to break the bank. That's why I'm excited to share that today's sponsor, Mumu, has an extraordinary offer for traders. Mumu has recently launched an exceptional trade offer that is hard to pass up. They're offering a 3% APY coupon, and here's the kicker.

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Yeah. If you do not have enough to survive if something were to happen. Yeah, I have a big friend group and we always go out to eat. It's always kind of like almost an assumption at this point that we're just going out to eat. It's just where we're going out to eat. Sure. And I get a little bit of like full-mo of like, oh, I'm going to miss a great conversation. I'm going to misogree.

meal or you know what you can do though right um just shove some sandwiches in your mouth then go and then go to drink some water i mean honestly so i have a large friend group too and we we definitely like to go out to eat yeah this thing's crazy they beeped like five times and then that's on my car i promise you're plate white man no go get him go get him no right at the peak too you have to pee no right at the peak oh really yeah we're getting some heavy beeping you can leave this in brandon Either way. I just, I don't, yeah, okay, so I, we go out to eat a lot, but every once in well, you know, if something financially is happening in someone's life, they're like, oh, I can't go out. And that's fine.

Welcome to life. Welcome to adulthood. Yeah. I think your future matters more than a simple conversation you might miss. Yeah. In my opinion. Yeah, yeah. No, I completely agree.

Good, because you'd be a child if you didn't. Yeah. I've been stuck in this loop of like, oh, I'm going to, I'm going to save up and I'm going to start eating at home. And then I buy groceries for home and then training comes around and then we go, we go right after. It's not even like a, I don't even think about it. Training? Training. Like, I do jiu-jitsu full-time.

Why have so many people come on the show who do jiu-jitsu like full-time? It's a really popular thing in Austin. It's probably like the mecca of J-Git-Tum. Yeah. Okay. You do that full-time? Yeah. So I train twice a day.

three hours per session. So like six hours. But you pay for that? No. So I teach classes and compensation for my membership. So it's about 325 a month that I get. You work three hours a day? No, no.

I don't work that three hours. I only do one class a week. It's about an hour a week. Oh, okay. And then 52 hours a year. Okay, that's a lot of time. I mean, I'm not necessarily posted, but that is a lot of time,

especially when we sit here and we have a $5,250 balance on a card. Yeah. Like, I would jit-sue, sure, maybe an hour a day, and then go work and pay off this card. Especially when all the money we have saved up is immediately going to taxes. Yeah. So I think I should probably cut back a little bit on jiu-tzu. It's kind of almost like an addiction at this point of... I'm all about it.

Man, I want you to be able to do it. Like, truly. I'm just trying to think about your time right now Because I mean You made a minimum payment towards it Sure, or you made a little more than that But then you immediately went and spent it back on this Now this isn't an interest free period

It looks like until when Until next month Fuck you Really? Why didn't you try to do anything then? Your balance went up $45 If it's due next month What kind of behavior is this?

Yeah, I shouldn't be spending on that card Well no shit. Why are you? I I still see the zero APR, so I see it as like free money. Oh, no offense, but you're not stupid. You just told me it's next month. Yeah. I'm sure you could see that too because you told me.

Yeah. So why the fuck have you not done anything? I think I'm just kind of playing dumb on this part of just letting it ride until I start getting APR. Okay. Now, I don't know. Some cards do it. Some cards don't. Sometimes there's back charges and interest.

If you don't pay it off. Oh, you had a lay fee. You had a lay fee, but then you got a reversed. Yeah. Why? Why did you almost? Why were you late? So that one, I've only had that happen one time on this card.

I have an auto withdrawal to the card, but it auto withdraws the day it's due. And I guess it didn't auto withdrawal in time, so it never went through in time. I'm not too sure why. And then why are you going to the fucking suit peddler? and just getting things on Amazon all this shit. On a card that you can't pay off that's going to start accruing interest next month at 30%.

30%. Yeah. 30 death stupid percent. And again, you rose the balance. You put a payment towards it. $290, that's not an insignificant payment towards this. That starts making progress. Then you spent $295.

And then there is the fee, but it ends up being reversed. Yeah. At least I didn't have to pay the feet twice. Buddy, it's going to be like $130 a month in interest. $130 a month. So now whatever payment you just made towards it, you essentially, in order to make that same amount of progress, you've got to put an extra $130 towards it on a monthly basis. And then not spend anything.

Yeah. Which I don't know if that's possible with you. Yeah. I'm not sure if it is either. Oh, come on. What, do you not give it a shit? You do not give it a future? I do.

That's why I'm starting to put money towards index funds and stuff. I think it's important for the long term. Like, what index fund? I just started it, like, literally this last month. What index fund? M1, S&P 500. Okay. Tell me, the S&P 500, on average.

What does it bring back? On average. 8%. Okay. That's over the overall general market. S&P 500 just goes through about 10. Tell me, what's bigger? 30 or 10?

30. Yeah, so we probably put the money towards the 30% debt. Hmm. Okay. Yeah. I mean, it's 20 more. Yeah. So it doesn't make any mathematical sense to be throwing everything into the market like that. Yeah, so I want to pay off this credit card completely this year.

I don't have an unreasonable goal of paying it off next month. I don't think that's even physically possible. Oh, to pay it off next month. Yeah, yeah. I don't think that's possible. I want to pay it off within the year. so that's kind of my new year's resolution. How are you getting there though? I mean, you already, again, knew this was coming.

You talked to my producers and you're like, yeah, I'm budgeting, I'm starting to do better and all this stuff. Again, the balance went up. Interest starts to accrue next month. Yeah. Now you're telling me I want to pay it off by the end of the year. Correlating that to what you said before versus what's in front of us, what is your plan? What in your mind would have this paid off by the end of the year? Because there are no actions in front of us.

surrounding that. No actions behind you surrounding that that make that an actual reality. Yeah. So I want to get that, you said 16% eating out. I want to get that down to almost zero, if not completely zero. But that's not the only thing, man. And then you have just bull-stopping and grabbing tequitos and actually just crap that it doesn't matter. It's an additional 15%. Yeah. Additional 15%. Yeah. Your transportation is a crazy 15% as well. Groceries was only 3%. unknown shopping that's Walmart Amazon Target you know you can get anything so we don't know what it is without seeing the actual receipt it's almost 4% subscriptions is 1% that's not crazy but again that would have taken your debt payment from like 9.7% to 10.7% then your other large purchases are 5%

so that's selling out money and something happened to Honda uh the Honda was just uh oil change in our alignment okay yeah for the car which that's fair I mean that That fits in. That fits in. Zalin out, we don't know what that was for, but... Okay. So food out totals almost 30% of my monthly. In terms of that you absolutely do not need, most likely, is between 30, 35%. That's crazy. I didn't know that.

I thought it was a lot less. Yep. Yeah, I thought that was like maybe 10% or so. What's your rent? I split it equally. What's your rent? My rent's 840. truest

even though you put $168 towards it balance only went down oh $12 $12 why because $67

of purchases not a crazy amount of money but you're making no progress on this but you're playing for this probably also pay this off by the end of the year how are you going to do that with these actions so that one was

inactive and the only thing that was an accidental purchase on that card through Amazon. I thought I clicked my debit card, but it was my credit card that I clicked on that one. So $4,286.89.96. The minimum of the payment of $132. It's chunky.

And then, yeah, there was the, I guess, accidental purchase with whatever you got from Amazon. What did you even get? Spass for Jiu-Jitsu. And then, yeah, a death $90 of interest was charged. Crazy. 25% interest rate. It's ridiculous. Okay, members one.

This is your car. What's your car? What is your car? It's a 2018 Honda Accord Sport 2.O.T. Car names are so stupid. The way Tesla names them just makes sense. It's this model, and it's long range or short range. Yeah.

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That is pretty good. I had a friend. Go on. What the, what the, what is that even possibly mean? My friend worked at the Honda, and he talked his boss in to give me the lowest APR they could offer. What's your credit score? It's right at 700 on the dot. Okay, yeah.

We do little special things. But the minimum monthly payment are $547. So again, that is chunky as well. Are you trying to claim that as a business? The payment? I just claim the depreciation. I just claimed depreciation on that. And what is the term of this loan?

It's a five year. This is the statement that blows my mind. This is insanity. This makes no sense. This is the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my life. This is just with the... What are you trying to? to get to and what you told us.

This shit makes no sense, man. No sense. So let's start it. In the checking account is $2,000 wonderful. We spent most of the money that came in anyway. Because Wendy's, in and out, kebabsies, giro, smoking burnouts. You smoke?

Yeah. What are everyone on the show smokes? What's up with everyone who has bad finances, also making bad decisions? and becoming addicted to nicotine. Yeah, it's probably like an addiction of spending and nicotine combined. Yeah, bad choices. McDonald's, Wendy's, Halal Hub, an apple subscription of some kind, Juice Land, another apple, Starbucks, figure eight coffee, Pedrosos Pizza,

bakery cafe, KGBBQ, KGBQ, some ales, more barbecue, Spotify subscription, tacos, and other apples. Apple Bill, Thunder Cod subs. More smoking to your death. Wendy's. Well, I mean, this is probably worth it. And then some tequitos in Mojo Coffee. Apple, Halal Hub.

What is this too awesome? I think it's a convenience store. Yeah. And $9, $6. So I highly doubt you needed that by any means, which since you go to HEB. Yeah. It's just a convenience store attached to a Euro place.

Okay. So I have some stupid tequitos. Yeah. Twin Peaks. Shooters. Tiquitos. Vending machine, I think. Mojo Coffee, Halal Hub, Apple Bill, McDonald's, smoking away your life.

Versace. Versace? That was a gift. Congratulations. Gift yourself out of debt. What? I don't give a shit. More coffee.

Apple. Apple store that time. $60. Smoking yourself into the. ground iPhone Sid's the payment plan for Apple oh you're on a payment plan for your iPhone

yeah okay dang hot some tequitos bakery cafe iPhone holy smokes McDonald's more tequitos figure eight in and out in and out Civil Goat pizza Tova more smoking

Jesus first it's so expensive too Amazon Highland Lounge Hulu's subscription there's nothing good there anyway. Tequitos, Pedro's Pizza, and Snowy Village. That's insane, dude. Yeah. That's insane. And then you have $260 invested or $286 invested. So it goes even the point. I mean, you're throwing things towards index once you're almost $300 towards it. Yeah. That's not, that's not, you're not even putting a debt in your retirement. Yeah. So I'm, your plan, remind me that it was just a, I just want to pay off my credit cards.

Yeah, but your plan to do how. It's going to be that, I mean, because a lot of the convenience store stuff especially is just wasted income as well. Like, I don't need to stop there. So, I mean, that's 30% of my income I could put towards my credit cards versus eating out. So I want to cut back a lot on that. I know it's not going to go to zero, but I'm trying to get it down to like five or so percent. Why is that not going to go to zero? Because I still want to be social enough in my friend group to.

Yeah, again, you can be social. Like, you don't, you're, I don't know, I feel like you're trying to justify the spending the money when it's money that you can't spend because that 5% will make a massive dent into your overall. Plus, you're not even saving money for taxes. So like, you like, I don't think you go and spend 5% on that. I want you to spend 30% on funding, but you do that after you're hitting 20% into retirement after you've paid off all your debt after you have a fully funded emergency fund. Yeah. I just never did it that way. I've never, I've always had success paying.

taxes, so I've just never done it that way. Yeah, you have. Everyone has success in everything that they're gambling on until the second they don't. That's true. And it's just risk, man. You're just having extra risk on it. Again, what if your hours get cut? Again, what if like the economy is in a, you know, massive downturn? What if, like, you and your workforce, other than like that brief little, blue at the beginning of COVID, you, you've never experienced an actual economic downturn. You don't know what it's like. You're just coasting. You're coasting on the idea that this is how it is this is the world that we're

in and this is what it's going to be forever you have nothing saved up for the rainy day and the rainy day comes yeah yeah like I had my rainy day and I'm glad I had those funds but well your rainy day was a little more of a choice you just sat on your for six months I get that someone I'm going to over but you could have

also been making some action like okay I get it dude's not giving me the job yet cool but in your mind he would cool it still has a happened yet so let's work until he gives us the job yeah gives us the job you know you got to work until then but you were just sitting on your and on your savings that was terrible yeah that was one of my

biggest financial mistakes i think i've made in a long time yeah ever probably uh okay so you're willing to cut back uh yeah i i want to start cutting back actually cooking at home and not just blowing my money what do you think's going to be different though i mean you're doing it for the social engagement so what are your what with the fomo that you've dealt with what are you going to be able to do that combats that yeah yeah so uh i like that sandwich idea actually i might take that one just bringing sandwiches so i can at least get home without being like well i was seeing eat before but like you can do that too i don't care if they you might get in trouble at some places yeah yeah because i go straight from training to eating and we don't finish training till like 839 and then

i don't get home then you drive somewhere yeah and then we drive somewhere yeah and then we drive Eating in a car. Yeah, so I could eat in the car maybe. It's a sandwich. It's easy. And then I don't normally get home to like 11 every night. Yeah, I'm not trying to deprive you either. Like I really want you to.

But more than anything, because your future matters, I want you to get out of debt. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's dangerous that you do not have that. Yeah, yeah. I think I'm just used to the spending I had in Pennsylvania and I still mentally haven't broken that, like, I'll always have another 10K check coming. Wasn't that two years ago, though?

Yeah, almost two years ago. Okay. Well. two years go on yeah welcome welcome to the real world so after what you're setting

aside for taxes should be you have a total income on average of $2,450 a month okay yeah yeah

your minimum monthly debt payments let's take a look here no student loans or anything huh no 731 and 90 cents of minimum monthly payments that's insane

your portion of rent one more time 840 and your portion of utilities it's about 50 a month. What about internet? 30. What's your car insurance? 250.

Yeah. I have an accident. Really? Yeah. Thank God for USA. I got quotes around here once I moved here and Geico tried to charge me 500. Your gas is insane, but it's probably for work. Yeah, it's all for work. $374 and $3.3. All for work. Now, I mean, you drive the to jujitsu and to places as well. I mean, it's not, but okay.

$300 for groceries. $100 for the total paper fund. This is everything else you need in life, just everything else that is just going to be, you know, necessary. Any ongoing medical things you have to pay for? No, I do, I do get, like, skin infections a lot from jujitsu, so maybe. How often do you have to treat this? Recently.

Antibiotic? Yeah, antibiotics. And what happens when you become resistant? We haven't got there yet, so we're just going to act like that. Do you know people who have? Yeah. Yeah. What happens?

It's bad. It's bad. What happens? So you start on orals. If you get on orals for long enough and it still doesn't treat it, they take you to IV. IV's very strong and it starts having bowel moving problems, stomach problems, like acid reflux. It's just, in general, very bad for you. and then that bill probably gets very expensive.

Yeah. So I'm... People haven't become resistant to the IV version? People do become... And then what? You kind of just keep throwing IV at it. Why not find a sport that doesn't like ruin your skin? Yeah, but it's not as fun.

You can choke people out, like... Oh, that's a weird thing to want to do. But also... Huh? Break people's arms, legs. You can do... You can do... Pretty much anything you want to, like a normal human.

Yeah, harming people. That sounds fun. Yeah. That's great. And infected skin. Yeah. That also does not sound fun. No, it's not.

I have a staff infection right now, actually. What's that? Staff infection. It's something that lives on your skin. It eats at your skin if you don't take care of it. Where is it? On my leg. Show us?

It doesn't we want to. It's teeny tiny. I see the redness. Is it hurt? Are you getting treated? Yeah. It hurts a lot. Yeah, I'm on orals right now. What's it from? Like specifically? So it's just exposed skin to a mat and then usually the like the worst ones are when you have cuts open. So I had a cut on my leg and it got into the cut. Oh gosh. But I've seen when they don't get treated it creates like a almost like it looks like a worm or like a bullet went through you. So it's just like a hole into you. Yeah, those are pretty bad. Yeah. So what should we set aside every month? for this medical issues.

It's only like, I have insurance, so like probably 40 bucks. Are you willing to show us a takedown on my producer? Can I do it to you? No. Don't do it to him, yeah. Yeah, you will. Okay.

You said 40? Yeah, about 40. Only if he can sense. He consents. It's at the end of the episode, and you'll see Noah, who so many of you love, can get blasted.

Yeah. So if you're actually setting aside money for taxes, you wouldn't be making it. Now, I know you have some good months, which must barely let you survive. But no, actually, you're not because the credit card debt has gone up. So that, I mean, that makes sense. It makes actual sense how the credit card debt has just continually been going up. Because what you need to survive, man, is $2,715.95. Again, if you're actually adequately prepared for taxes, you have like $2,450 left on a monthly basis. Yeah.

So, again, I'm good with you doing the jih Tjitsu and all that stuff, but how many hours a week are you working right now? Probably about 15. 15. Yeah. Fuck you. What is this? Why? If you can't pay up a credit card, where are you only working 15 hours a week?

What are you? You're not a baby. What are you doing? Yeah. I've had it work for me, so I just kept... But it's not. You're building up debt. You're building up debt.

It's not working. It's not working. It's obviously not working, right? Yeah. Okay. So why? 15 hours a week? That's just, you just not giving a...

That says you being a child. Oh, I actually had hope for a second. And I still kind of do. Maybe. I don't know. It's just... Oh, okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. 15 hours a week, man. I thought I was sitting across from someone he's willing to cut back on his shit. And even if you do, man, you're making like, you're not making enough. And you only work 15 hours a week. And you were willing to, you talked to our producers and said you were on the right track. On the right track.

On the right track. Okay, cool. Cool. On the right track. But you're building up credit card debt. If you're building up credit card debt in order to survive, I think you would need to work maybe 20 hours a week. 20 hours a week. Would that be crazy?

No. No. So what the fuck? Why are you only working 15? You're 23. You're not 16. Yeah, I've worked really long hours with a really low pay, and this job's pretty high pay for really long. But you're not making enough.

So why are you not working more? Even at another job, I don't give a 15 hours a week is nothing. Yeah, it's kind of... You're retired. It's close to the top of what they offer. There's only a couple of jobs. Other job. Other job.

Yeah. So that's kind of where my training comes in. I just train for the rest of the time of the week. Yeah, but I don't give a shit your training. It's not providing you. anything. Physical fitness, yes, but longevity financially, no. Yeah. Like you're gonna die under a bridge broke, but you'll be fit. Yeah. Great. Yeah. Why are you only working 15 hours a week? I need some insight into your brain and how it's operating. That's just the

way of been working for the last four years. Congratulations, but again, it hasn't been working. So why have you not addressed the situation? I just don't like working a lot of hours. Well, there it is. So you're a baby. Yeah. Okay. Are you going to man up? If it means working more than 15 hours now. I'm happy working 15 hours.

Maybe 20. I'd work 20. Oh my gosh. What are you? Do you know how hard people work out there, man? And they're not even making it. And you have the ability to work half as much as them and actually live a good life. And you're not even willing to do that?

It's the most immature thing. ever heard of my life. I mean, I've worked 120 hour weeks. Congratulations. You're working 15 right now. I don't give a shit what you've done. Yeah. Man, I was just never happy. So. Yeah, I think there's a little bit in between 150 and 15. For sure. But you're not willing to work over 15? Not at this current job, no. I don't know. No, an other job. You get a second job. Like, I feel like I run out time in the day. You don't because you're spending it all on fun and hanging out with friends, going out to eat, breaking people's arms. That's what you're doing. That's what you're doing, not running out of time. You're just spending your whole day having fun. 160 hours, 168 hours in a

week. You're working 15. 153 hours that is available for you to do shit now. I want you to sleep eight hours a day. I want you to sleep eight hours a day. I'm not an evil person. Like, you know, 97 hours left in a week that you're awake. 97 hours left in a week that you're awake. And you won't work one more hour? One more hour? Why aren't you willing? No, no, no.

Let's just say even for the job you're in right now, even for the job you're in right now, why are you not willing to work one more hour? For the job that I'm in now, I work most of the hours they give me. I only decline the jobs, maybe five or so jobs a month. That could be a lot, though. No, those are the jobs that are, they won't pay me any extra. It'll be like, I'll only make like $10 an hour for the job. How many hours?

Maybe $10. $10 an hour? And you only, per job. Per job. Per job. How many jobs are you? You said six. Yeah.

That's $600. Oh, congratulations. You now have enough to survive. Yeah. $600 is a lot when you're, $300. away from being able to make your bills. Yeah. So again,

this is the most childish, immature thing I've ever heard. Yeah. Maybe the most childish immature thing that's action or belief or opinion or person that's ever been on the show. You saying that. I was having hope for a bit.

They were probably having hope for a bit. And now you've destroyed everything. I just always, I've been liking working short hours, short weeks. I know, but you can't survive. Yeah. So congratulations. Work those extra hours.

Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. So you will do it? Maybe. Yeah. Okay.

Why maybe? I still like training. I still like training. I don't give you like. Do you like surviving? Do you like being able to retire? Do you like having a roof over your head? Do you like not having death that's hounding you and keeping you up?

Yeah. Cool. Then just do a couple extra hours of a fucking week. 60 hours divided by four, it's an extra 15 hours a week, and you're working 30 hours, 30 hours. People, the average American would dream of working 30 hours a week and actually making it. But even if you work 30 hours a week, you have an extra $300,

but we still need to set more money aside for taxes. So actually, let's see, $600. Actually have an extra $420 a month, which means you actually only have an extra $120 a month, which means you need to start throwing that towards that, getting a fully funded purchase fund. Even if we were doing minimum fee payments to tell us paid off on the Honda because it's such a low interest rate,

You know, we don't like the term. So I would probably move it with like 600 bucks a month, 650. But either way, either way, either way. Obviously, we can't afford that. But 150 extra dollars left on a monthly basis. You need a six-month-emergency one. In your case, that is going to be, well, actually, it's going to be about $12,000. So $12,000 plus the $4,200, $89 you owe on one credit card and $5,240.

$5,000, you owe on another card. And you only are willing at the, no, no, no. or you're not even willing to do this. I'm going to have to convince you to work an extra 14 hours a week. Not 15 hours a week. But, okay, let's say I'm even able to convince you to do that. Even if you do, it takes 114,000,

3 months, months to have a fully funded emergency fund, one of the most basics things you can do in life to be in a sound financial position. And one of the most, and actually paying off your cards. 143 months, also known as 12 years. 12 years. Yeah.

that's hilarious. That's crazy. You're 35, 35. Not having a single paid for fun. Thirty-five. Finally getting on a credit card debt. Finally have an emergency fund, assuming there's no economic issues. Nothing happens in the industry that you're in. Nothing happens to your life. No injuries. No nothing from jujitsu. Maybe you get, you know, you can't see anymore. So you can't drive. I don't know. You never know what can happen. It's a crazy thing. You were talking about basically killing people. So I know crazy things can happen. Man, I, that's unacceptable. How was that acceptable to you? The, the extra work? That's if you double your hours from right now, double your hours from now. It takes 12 years to pay off your debt and I have a fully funded emergency fund.

You're not even willing to do that. So how is this acceptable in any way whatsoever for your life? I'm disgusted. Yeah, I've been surviving so far, so. You're not. Yeah. But people confuse that. You're not.

You're putting it all on a credit card. Yeah. You're kicking the can down the road. You're not surviving. You're literally putting your survival on a debt. Your debt is a survival, and that comes back, and it's going to take away that surviving. Yeah. Because you have to pay it back.

You're not surviving from your own life. You're surviving on someone else's money, the bank's money, truest money, Chase Freedom's money. So 12 years to double my work. Load. That's if you doubled your workload for. 12 years and didn't have a single you didn't pay for fun once in 12 years which is impossible impossible obviously for you beyond impossible yeah that's hilarious yeah that's that's a lot oh yeah i uh i don't really know what to say to that change something are you not just who am i

talking to right now i thought i was making more than that you're not setting aside money for taxes yeah now yes you're going to deduct things you're going to do this, you're going to do that, and hopefully you're doing it all legally. I don't know, probably not. Close enough. Yeah, I don't know if that works. I don't know. That was actually really sad and disappointing to me, man. You're 23. You have so much potential. You don't understand with your income for the hours you work. You have so much potential and you are throwing it all down the drain. You're going to look back. You're going to look back and you're going to be so embarrassed and sad and upset at yourself and pissed off at yourself that you did this when you're going to

have almost nothing in retirement by the time you're 35 yeah you're going to look back you're going to have seen that you can have a couple hundred thousand dollars saved in retirement by then after some compound growth with your income if you put in actual hours yeah so so i should double my work and just that's a minimum man yeah that's obviously not enough it takes 12 years if you double your work it takes 12 years that have a fully funded emergency fund to pay off two credit cards that doesn't even count in paying off the honda but the honda will be automatically paid off by then through minimum monthly payments. Yeah.

I might take a little shorter because all of a sudden the Honda payment goes away after five years, but probably four from now whenever you got it, you know, but... I'm three years in. Okay. So maybe that accelerates it to 10 years. That's 10 years of doubling your income. Yeah. That's not enough.

No. You need to triple your income. Yeah. Like easily. What do you mean? Like, I wouldn't want to be in debt for 10 years, for sure. Yeah, but you're also not willing to work more than 15 hours a week. This is the good case scenario.

where you double that. Yeah. Which one's more important to you? Like worker debt? Probably debt. Okay. So you're working more than 15 hours a week? Yeah.

I'll start looking for a new job. You're working more than 30 hours a week? I wouldn't say over 30. Buddy, it was 30. It was 30 that got you to 10 years and you just said that was unacceptable. I don't know what else to do past 30 hours a week. What do you mean? Like I haven't worked that in so long.

I don't know how that would be a fucking adult. Yeah. And do it like the rest of us. We all got shit to take care of. Why are you special? Why are you this magical being? Who are you going to fall back on? Yeah.

The rest of us is society because you're choosing not to work? It's not fair. That's true. Yeah. So what would I need to make monthly to make this feasible within the next like five years? Oh my gosh. I just forgot. I just forgot until this exact moment that you said that one card would be paid off by the end of this year.

Yeah. That's not even possible because you're making less than you need to survive. What was your plan? Your plans didn't exist. It was a fantasy. I thought that food would take care of most of it. No, I don't even have going out to eating in your budget. You can afford it.

Yeah. What kind of dream world are you living in, buddy? So how much would I need? To take care of it all in five years? Yeah. All right, let's see. Okay, let's see. We're doing this very basic version, not assuming extra minimum multi-payments once they're paid off going towards some of the debt, but we're also not taking an account the interest that's occurring out of the debt.

We're going to just do general thing. You're actually going to go through our budgeting program, and that's going to give you a more accurate payoff. We have a payoff calculator, avalanche or snowball. You're going to go through the program and build the actual best budget that you can. Okay. And while I do this math, by the way, let me thank you for, for. being on the show. You're disappointing the fuck for me and I'm a little bit embarrassed. I'll be honest for you. But thanks for being on the show because it's an educational resource for many people

out there. And I really hope. I hope this is what changes your life because the path you're going down is very destructive. Yeah. I want you to be on the show. And if you want to be on the show, link in the description below, you can apply. Um, yeah, you can get your hammer financial score down there for free as well, by the way. Pretty fun. Okay, I need to do this. Yeah. Thanks for having me on because I didn't know how bad it was. Well, let's say, again, this is basic. Let's say your needs don't increase, but your minimum of the needs over the next five years,

you'll need $162,955. Okay. I'm trying to think of how I want to do this math. Am I stupid? Am I being stupid? Is there like a radiation of stupidity at this table? Yeah, probably. I'm sorry, that was mean.

It's kind of funny, though. I'm going to do. I'm just, I'm being a... Oh, I am an actual. idiot okay I get it you'll need to throw an extra $358 and 90 cents a month

towards the debt and eventually towards fully funding your emergency fund and that again does not take care of the car what's a fully funded emergency fund that's six months six months of your living expenses yeah you need to bring in post setting money aside for taxes minimum

$3,700 $3,073.90 minimum After taxes. After sending money aside for taxes. That's 30% you said? Huh? You said 30% for taxes?

That's a good conservative number to put aside for taxes. And self-employed. Guys, it's a new year and you need to make your money work for you. You can do exactly what I literally do right now and put my money in the best high-yield savings account. So-fi. I get a 4.6% yield on my money, and I also took advantage of the bonus of up to $250 when I signed up.

You can start 2024 off Amazing by doing the same by going to the link in the description below. This is not taking... This is the perfect number to get there. But that's also five years of not literally going out to eat once, not getting a single cup of coffee once other than what's in your grocery bill. It's without having any paid for fun for five years. That's without your income going up, which means you can speed it up by your income going up.

Yeah. But that also isn't taking account. any rent increases. You know, rent is in a slump right now in Austin, but over the course the next five years, you never know where it goes. It could rebound. This is without utilities going up.

This is without the cost of food going up. Let's say we have another massive bottom of inflation. You never really know. Sometimes when inflation hits, you know, we get a spike and then we get a spike again. That has been seen all throughout history. We're on the trail down. I'm not saying it's going to happen again,

but let's say if it does, then these costs are going to increase. So, but this is like the literal, like, in the most basic way, the exact number that has to come in post taxes. Yeah. So like probably 4,000 is a good goal to shoot for? Monthly post tax?

Yeah, basically, yeah, $4,000. $3,996 and $7. Yeah. $4,000 a month. Yeah. So increase my money. And stop spending it. You're not very far from that, man.

Yeah. You're not very far from that. That's for you doing it in five years. Why is, again, this is two credit cards in a six-month emergency fund. So much can happen in five years. So why am I even entertaining the idea? idea that five years is acceptable for this. This should be a two-year mission.

It should be a year-and-a-half mission. You are young. You have a lot of energy. You're fit. You're healthy. Go out there and work. Like a mature individual that has something to take care of and you have something to take care of.

I need you to pay this off in a year and a half and you have a fully funded an emergency fund by then, which you are totally capable of. Totally capable of in a city like Austin, man. Yeah. You're going to be working long hours. Absolutely. You're going to be sacrificing for a a year and a half, but that sacrifice for a year and a half is giving you decades and decades and decades and

decades of your life for amazing prosperity. And living that fun life that you want to live and having the ability to retire at some point. Yeah. Five years is unacceptable. You find five years acceptable. Not acceptable, but more realistic than the 12 years. Why is that realistic? I've had people on the show with much worse situations who are able to get out of debt quicker. And have paid off the amount of death that you have by the time they've, since they've been on the show, we sent out a survey. We're getting your responses. Yeah. You're just being. child. Yeah, well, compared to the 12 years that was initially...

Well, 12 years is beyond unacceptable. That doesn't mean this is good. I don't want to get shot. I wrote a little song to remind you, choice hotels get you more of the experiences. You value. The Cambria hotels got it all. A rooftop bar, have a ball. Cocktails up here feel just right.

Is Camry your home? Bring a date. Your team or even your mom. Book direct at choiceotails.com. See you on the roof. I know being decapitate is worse. Doesn't mean I still want to get shot. This five years is still really bad.

Yeah. Just because it's better than 12 doesn't mean I find something I wanted to be by any means whatsoever. Yeah, I still, my goal still is by the end of the year. Yeah, but how do you do that though? How many hours are you willing to work a week? Oh, it sounds like I need to work a lot more. Well, no.

How many hours are you willing to work a week? Because that's what your main issue has been, is not willing to work. Yeah, probably an additional, like 15 to 20. From where you are now? Yeah. Remember. Are you... Okay.

Easy kill. Okay. Let's not say insulting things, shall we? Your brain. Yeah. Did I understand what I said? what happened if you're only working an extra 15 hours a week? Yeah, 12 years.

Okay, and you just said you're only willing to work an extra 15 to 20 hours a week. I would find a... And you said that is going to meet your goal by paying this off by the end of the year? Well, I think everything passed that extra 15 would all be straight to the credit card, though. No, it better be. Yeah. But you said cap 20? Yeah, I still think 20

I don't know what number we're going off of For hourly wage I'd be making I'm going off of your current Oh, so So that would be that would be like $6,000 right? I went off of what you told me you would get If you work those extra jobs that are offered that you decline Oh, okay, okay

Yeah, I would probably All that's available, right? In terms of your job? For that job, yeah I would try to find a different job paying You'd have to get another job. Yeah at least similar.

I'd try to shoot if I'm doing 15 hours a week extra from another job I try to shoot for another 2,000 a month. You need to make $22 an hour. You hit that 40 hours a week, 40 hours a week, which isn't even not even what you wanted to do.

So what are we even doing? What is the purpose of any of this? What? Actually, that's a great question. That's a great question. Thank you. Thank you, Caleb. You're great at asking questions.

Why the fuck are you here? Why are you possibly here? Not willing to work more than 40 hours a week. What a joke. What a joke? Yeah, I still want to get my finances in order. Awesome, but you're not willing to do what's necessary in order to get your finances in order. Why the possible fucking you right here?

Why are you in that chair? Why are you sitting right in front of me? Well, first I wanted to see how bad it was, and I didn't know it was nearly this bad. Okay, now that you know it. Yeah. Usually that's when you do, uh, okay, I'm going to do the thing that says already to get out of this. Yeah. But you're like, uh, uh, uh, 35 hours a week at a week max or else I'm going to die.

Yeah, I still want to stay I mean, I want to stay at 40 or under Oh, this keeps changing What is your max? At first it was 15 Because I do want to stay at 15 But that's improbable at this point So I'd be at most comfortable with Ford

Wait, what's your phone bill? Do you have a phone bill? It's just $52 a month I mean, I mean you have no money left over So I missed that 50, you said? Yeah Oh, you have a minimum monthly payment for your iPhone as well That's that, that's that My mom pays for my phone bill.

Oh, okay. Did you go to college? No. Look into a certification. Maybe I can gift you a tech certification through course careers. You might be good in sales. Nah, you're not very talkative. So you might not be good in tech sales.

What I might be able to gift you a certification and something you find more valuable anyway. Because, again, if you're willing to work 40 hours a week, which I don't even think you're willing to, you'd need to make $22 an hour to make $4,000 hours a month. Yeah. Before taxes. Yeah. Which is what you need to get that five year mark. Again, I'm still so beyond confused how you think you're going to pay this off within a year by the end of this year.

And only your cognitive dissonance is astounding. Just the where you think you want to go, but what you're willing to do are so opposing in every way whatsoever. Like, I'm blown away. Yeah. I definitely need to work on the amount of hours. work, I think I've been too comfortable for too long, and that should probably change. Undersatement of the history of this show. Yeah. I want to know what you'll actually fucking do. Like, this is, that is the easiest cop-out that anyone could ever have. Oh,

you're right. This is wrong. I should fix it. What are you actually going to do, man? Well, I'll start looking for a new job. That will... What does that look like? Tell me what that looks like. I have a couple friends in the nightclub scene, so maybe bouncing over weekends and weekdays. That's something that can fit both into my current work schedule and my training schedule. I'm also looking at trying to start a wrestling program for the youth in this area. Oh, good. I mean, can we do that when you're like not about to live under a bridge by chance?

I mean, that will be a paid role. It won't be just charity. No, you said you're starting it. You're talking about building a business from the ground up. Most businesses don't make a profit for a while. It'll be built into already established training room. So it'll just be an additional class, Hensel, Gracie Austin. And they've approved this.

Yeah. So now we're looking either end of this month or beginning of next month. What do you think you're going to make? Obviously, you have to recruit people and help people sign up. Yes, we have about, we have on my current team right now of people that committed, quote, unquote. Current team. The clients? Yeah, we call it team, but yeah, clients, whatever you want to call it.

Sure. We have 10, so it should be about $200 per class once a week, 800. That's if we do it. I'm still, that's still in the air. I wish I had. We're recording this on a Friday. Yeah. I really wanted to have some hope in someone before I was heading in this weekend.

You've destroyed me. Maybe I'm just getting jaded, but you've destroyed me. Sending a budget, stupid as f*** makes no sense. You basically miss the payment. Zero out of ten. Your debt, it's not even close to the worst for your age. It's stupid, but it's not like the worst. Four out of ten.

You're just not willing to do anything to tackle it that an actual adult with any semblance of maturity would do. Emergency fund, technically nothing, because it's all saved up for taxes. Zero out of ten, retirement. You contribute to a few hundred bucks. I mean, what is this even invested? Just S&P and then

Through what platform? M1 Okay, I've heard okay things about M1 And then like a couple dollars in NVIDIA I've personally been using Mumu and it looks better than Either one Doesn't matter too much

Invidia? Oh gosh man Is that bad? Well What percentage of that of your overall portfolios? I'm not going to give investing advice That just seems like being a little spooky spooky It's 30% of 30%.

So like, was that 12%? 11%. Retirement 1 out of 10 because you have something in there. Real estate, nothing 0 out of 10. Hammer Financial Score 1 out 10. Make sure to check out all the resources. Link in the description below. They are what I use or would use in specific situations,

including the best budgeting program in the history of the internet. But I do want to end this on a positive note and I'll let you beat the shit. My producer. Oh, thank goodness. End this portion. So we're gonna go over a throw into a choke today. So we're gonna get over and under. We're gonna put our head.

And lay them down. Now once we get them here, we take our arm all the way around. Shoulder here. And we just squeeze until it goes up. You didn't brush your teeth. Oh, boy. He knows this shit. That really suck.

Thanks to all of our Patreon producers for making this episode possible. If you want to participate in an episode of financial audit and you're able to make it to Austin, Texas, please fill out an application in the survey linked in the description below. You can also send a link to your friends or family who you think might be good to be on the show. If you have any questions, you can email casting at calopammer.com.