Finding Mastery with Dr. Michael Gervais - 5 Questions to Unlock Your Inner Potential | Dr. Mike Gervais - AMA Vol.29

Episode Date: May 6, 2026

What questions are tugging at you right now, and how might exploring the answers help you live and perform with more clarity?We're back with another special edition of the Finding Mastery podcast: an Ask Me Anything episode, built from the deep and sometimes vulnerable questions submitted by our community.Joining Dr. Michael Gervais again is Jeff Byers, former NFL player, Co-Founder and CEO of Momentous, and a longtime friend of Finding Mastery. Jeff built Momentous on a foundation of transparency and scientific integrity in an industry that can be full of noise, and he brings that same standard of honest engagement to the questions we explore here. His experience navigating the identity shift from elite athlete to entrepreneur makes him a uniquely grounded co-host for conversations about who we are, what drives us, and how we keep growing when the road ahead isn't clear.The questions we explored:Navigating a major life transition... how to work through the grief of leaving a sport, the psychology of identity foreclosure, and why transitions are actually an invitation to examine who you are and who you're becoming.When your life is good but something feels missing... the difference between being stuck and being in the fog, what the biology might be telling you, and how self-efficacy, agency, and your own life history factor into the picture.Finding your purpose when it hasn't revealed itself yet... the research on purpose as a cornerstone of a thriving life, the three components of a clear purpose, and a practical framework to start building one right now.What community actually means... why belonging goes deeper than shared interests, what we lose when we slide toward digital connection only, and why community is built on responsibility as much as relationship.AI and human potential... whether the race toward AI is pulling our attention away from mindfulness and human development, and how to think about this new tool without losing sight of what makes us human.Who and what shaped us... a personal look at the heroes, idols, and influences that shaped both Mike and Jeff, and what those figures reveal about the values and first principles we carry forward.The questions in this episode came from real people wrestling with real things. If any of them resonate with something you're carrying right now, that's the point.__________________________________Links & ResourcesSubscribe to our Youtube Channel for more conversations at the intersection of high performance, leadership, and wellbeing: https://www.youtube.com/c/FindingMasteryGet exclusive discounts and support our amazing sponsors! Go to: https://findingmastery.com/sponsors/Subscribe to the Finding Mastery newsletter for weekly high performance insights: https://www.findingmastery.com/newsletter Download Dr. Mike's Morning Mindset Routine: findingmastery.com/morningmindset Follow on YouTube, Instagram, LinkedIn, and XSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

These questions are amazing. Not to have a spoiler. This first one like hits hard for me. Oh, boy. What questions are tugging at you right now? And how might exploring the answers to those questions help unlock your potential? Everything you need is already inside you. Welcome back.

We're welcome to a special episode of the Finding Mastery podcast. I am your host, Dr. Michael Jerva. A high-performance psychologist named Michael Jerva. Who Pete Carroll brought into work with the Seahawks. Famous for his work with Felix Baumgartner when he jumped down. out of space in the Stratos project. Olympic athletes depend on something more than just training and talent.

They have to stay mentally tough. And this week, we're turning the microphone around again. And instead of diving into Master's through the minds of our remarkable guests, we are going straight to you for another Ask Me Anything episode. What does community mean today? I'm having a hard time defining my purpose.

With the focus on AI, are we taking our eyes off the ball on the importance of human potential and mind for the sake of machine learning. I love this question. You have once again submitted really deep and thoughtful and sometimes vulnerable questions about life and performance and relationships and how to navigate the complexities of our human experience. Now, in this episode, we have the help once again, a former NFL player, co-founder and CEO of Momentus, and of course the friend of finding mastery, Jeff Beyers. All offer insights and perspectives designed to help us all. think a little differently, to hopefully live a little better. What really matters to me above all

else? And what are the first principles that are going to guide me as I go on this adventure? As you listen, I hope that you'll pay attention to the questions that resonate most strongly with you. All right. Last question here. Wait, before you go any further. That is so cool. The research on it is really clear. So with that, let's jump into your questions, our reflections, and an exploration of what matters most right here on finding mastery. Jeff, round two. This is like a real, I said it last time, it's a treat to be able to, you know, sit with you and kind of wrestle down some really difficult, honest, real questions from our community.

So thanks again for being here. I'm stoked. Again, like these questions are amazing and I see myself in pieces of them as a whole, like, not to have a spoiler. This first one, like, hits hard for me. And I'm excited to have this conversation. Now I know they'll put you back on the hotspot. Which is here.

But these are so fun. And I think this is just like a great reminder for me of we all have this inside of our brain. And we all have little pieces of this and that we're not alone, right? In our feelings and what we have. And from the last conversation, we had one of the things that just kept sticking with me is like creating that process and that routine, but also how important community is. And like knowing that you're not alone in these feelings of like just coming out and writing these questions, I think is a huge step for these people in like overcoming or great. growing. I love that take on it. And I feel the same way that I feel more connected to the community by understanding what they're wrestling with. Yeah. And I see myself in the questions as well. So let's

get in it. What's interesting is like the through line in a lot of these questions is like when your identities change and shift and you like have to make a change in your life or it's like what we became known for is not who we are going forward. And it like resonates with me, right? From like professional athlete to not a professional athlete and a business leader and like having to reinvent yourself. So anyways, first question. It's a long one. Bear with me. It's from Emily. I'm a 28 year old competitive athlete from Canada and a mental performance consultant. I've reached a point in my sport career where I feel pulled to retire. I'm 99% sure that's what I'll do at the end of the season. I feel a lot of peace around my decision and excited to redirect a lot of that time and energy

towards things I align more with my values like building a family, investing in my community, and growing my business. That being said, there are still a ton of tough emotions coming with the transition, including the sadness of leaving all of my friends in the sport and not seeing them every weekend, as well as the feeling of letting go and grieving some of the goals I set for myself a long time ago, getting to compete in the Olympics as one of them. I know that investment it would take for me to go to Olympics would require me putting a lot of other dreams and experience on hold. And that's not a sacrifice I'm willing to make anymore.

Even though logically I can rationalize that, there's still this grief to go through and letting go of the sport I've played since I was seven. I've worked with athletes in the transition. However, I want to hear your thoughts on the best way to move through this transition. Thank you for your help and making such a wonderful podcast. Emily, I'm just going to say, like, I've transitioned from sport and like all of this, like, well said. But what I found now that I'm out of sport is that this transition you go through,

you go through a couple times in your life. And it's not just in sport and everybody goes through it. It's very relatable to like changing your identity and those types of things. So I'm excited, Mike. The high line for the question is like, I'm in a transition phase. There are some tough emotions that I'm working through. I love how she says I'm letting go. I need to let go.

But I think it's not really letting go of the sport. It is letting go of the dreams that you had through that vehicle that's tricky. There is a transition with the relationships that you have with the people. And there's a transition with identity. So for me, those are the three main tools to this conversation. And if we address each one of those, some of the most dangerous words that an athlete says to me is when I say, like, who are you? You know, kind of a banal question. But obviously it's got some deep.

deep roots to it and they say, well, I'm an athlete. I go, oh boy. Okay. That's what got you good is that you went all in. And when most people were hedging their bets, you chipped all in. And that is required to get really good and to do it for a long time is to go all in, unless you are a absolute freak of nature. Okay. This is a moment. Transitions are a moment to metamorphose to, you know, kind of go through a growth arc. And it's an invitation. So the invitation is to examine identity in your life because it was what's called an identity foreclosure is the simplicity of the idea I am a something. I'm an athlete.

You have foreclosed your identity on all the other variability that you could have in your life. Okay. Again, that's what got you good, but that's kind of the moment to examine the invitation, if you will. There's a visual that comes to my mind and it's not complete, if you will, but lobsters crawling on the bottom of the ocean, there's a moment in time where they need to take the vulnerable risk to shed that shell that they're in,

they brought them all the safety, but they're maxing it out now, shed that shell, walk across the ocean floor, and venture into this new bigger, uncomfortable shell. And if they do that, they have the potential to actually grow into something bigger. And the uncomfortableness of an old shell,

the vulnerability of the naked walk on the ocean floor, and then the uncomfortableness of inhabiting a new bigger shell, is all kind of an image that comes to mind when I think about transitions. So first and foremost, it's an invitation to take a look at your identity. And when you sit with, who am I,

as the most ancient of all questions, who am I? And you sit with, I'm not suggesting you'll get an answer, but it's a process to sit with it, write about it, meditate on it, talk about it with people of wisdom. And then the second is, like,

what is my purpose? That's thinking much bigger than the small, little transition stuff that you're going through. But what is the big aim in my life? And the third element is what is the vision? When I close my eyes and I use my imagination, what is a compelling future that I want to work toward? So those are three parts to identity that I think are really important. Who am I? What's my purpose? And when I use my imagination, what's the vision that I think is compelling? That's good work, no matter where you are. But the transition bit, it's the invitation to do that

internal work. You don't have to, like the lobster, shed the shell. You can move to the next phase of your life and still have the identity of an athlete. I think that that's hard. I think it's also hard to do the internal work. The downside of sticking with an old identity that you foreclosed on, because it got you good, is that you miss a growth moment, a real transitional growth moment. It's also hard work to be vulnerable on the bottom of the ocean floor. I have not. I have not not had to go through that transition. I'm fortunate that the craft that I've invested in, psychology is kind of with me for the rest of my life. Now, I did go from a student to a professional, to a professional, to an entrepreneur, like, there's micro transitions in place. So I do want

to defer back to you. Yeah. How did you go from? I am an athlete. I'm assuming that you had that. Maybe you didn't. Did you have that? Yeah. How did you go through that phase? And then before you answer, just there's two other bumpers, which is the grieving of the hopes and dreams. And if losing is no longer a danger, hold this idea for a minute. If losing is no longer dangerous, I become really free. And in that vein, if losing, meaning letting go of the dream is no longer dangerous, I become really powerful. So I want to give you a bumper to push up against on the letting go piece. But first, let's start with identity.

Well, first off, Emily, congratulations. Like, being 28 and still being an athlete. That's a cool way to see it. It's freaking awesome. That's a cool to see it. And this took me time to realize this as well. When did you retire from sport? 28, 29, right around this time.

Are you congratulating yourself as well right now? Yeah, but, like, Emily, you should have so much gratitude because so many of us as young kids, right? We dream about being professionals. dream. For me, it was like taking terrible jump shots in my driveway, saying I'm Michael Jordan, right? And I see it in my boys right now. Were you grateful when you were in your transition phase? That was. But I had a little different. You were forced out. I was, uh, I had a transition moment early where I thought the game was taken away. That's right. Because of injury. And I,

I had already grieved by the time I had pre grieved. And it set me up differently than most. but you were one of the few human beings that got to play a game to your 28. And it's special. And wait, before you go any further, that is so cool. The lens that you're filtering this question through is really to myself, I'm like, damn, I miss that. Yeah. I'm really stoked to have, listen to how you're framing it.

Even if we stopped right here, because I know you got a little bit more magic behind what you're going to say, even if we stopped right here, I think you gave Emily the gift and our community the gift. Like, wait, hold on. Remember to frame through gratitude. Because there's something, there's something really special about the moment that you get to. Keep going with the magic, but that's real.

That's great. The other aspect of this is I still dream about playing. Like, maybe half of my dreams that I have. Like literal dreams. Are of me still playing. Wait, when you wake up in the middle of night and your eyes come up or you're waking up in the morning, you're like, and I was dreaming about tackling.

I was dreaming about putting my hand in the ground. I was dreaming about sitting in Heritage Hall. I was dreaming about my, you know, running on the field. I still, like, I still very actively dream about football, getting called back up and, like, the stresses of, like, I'm 40 now, and I just got called by Pete to come play for the Raiders. What was he thinking? Right?

Like, it's crazy because it's so ingrained. Because you play for Pete Carroll, just to be clear. Yeah. It's so ingrained in my DM. and a of sport, and I did it for such a long period of my time of who I am, but I still dream about it. So have you worked through identity? Do you still say I'm an athlete? Or have you? I don't believe I'm an athlete. Did you believe you were an athlete? Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Your identity, oh, man. Like, if you ask 19 year old, Jeff, who are you? I'm a football player. That's right.

So you foreclose your identity just like maybe Emily's doing, maybe 100%. Yeah. Right. And I think it's very natural. Yeah. Right. Do you see the danger in it too? Oh, it's not. much danger. Yeah. Right. And when it got taken away from me when I was 20, right, you're like, who am I? What am I going to do? All I know how to do is work out and train, put my hand in the ground and do this, right? And oh, my community, my people, I can relate to them. I can be myself. What I learned is football didn't define me. Football helped shape me. I define me. I get to choose that. And I, like, had great people around me when I was young to help realize there's more to life than sport. How did they do that? Telling you what you don't want to hear,

but what you need to hear. Amen. Right. And for the parents listening right now, you can get ahead of this thing, right? It is not a prerequisite that you foreclose on your identity for your kid to do well in sport. Yep. It's not a prerequisite. It is a natural thing that happens for the untrained family. Yes. We don't know better. You've had no idea, okay? Because what we want as parents is, see our kid good at something,

or they like how they feel when they're doing, and then we know as an adult, like, oh, there's potentially a really exciting future that my kid could do something they're good at that's an exciting path forward. You need to practice more. You need to be more into it. Why are you not, you know, do it?

And so there's this press to foreclose the identity around the more narrow thing. You don't have to do that. Right. So we talk about identity now too, right? I'm the co-founder, CEO of Momentus. That's right. Is that your identity right now? No. Oh, good. I was going to say, oh, so you haven't gotten through. Because I learned that lesson, right? And there's going to be an end. And that's not like what Momentus is and the special business that we're trying to create in culture. It's not who I am. That's a part of me. But there's going to be Jeff after that. Jeff lives beyond. Emily, you live beyond sport. Right. But what you learn in sport shapes you, right? And what you have to find, what I found right after I retired. And I don't know if somebody said this or whatever.

I went back and said, what did I love about sport? What just, like, why do I dream about it? What makes it so special to me? And then you go find things in your life to replicate that. You pull those things. Like, I love this uncomfortableness. We talked about in the last AMA. Like, I love feeling uncomfortable and, like, always having to earn it every single day.

Love it. I love that like there's like this continuous pursuit of getting better. Nobody's good enough, right? As an athlete, like you never reach the pinnacle. You never settle. I love that. And I love team. I love being responsive to people and like having that like sense of like, oh, can I trust this person? Can I trust that person? And like that's what I went in Chase. And that's why I became a founder and entrepreneur is because that stress, that uncomfortableness, that change, that ever evolving was something that I loved about sport. took inward reflection of that, and I didn't find it right away. What you're talking about is kind of a two-step process, which is you felt some pain, you did some self-discovery work, you pulled forward. I failed. How did you fail? I went into finance, realized it was not who I was, not what I wanted to be. I could make a ton of money.

And I was like, it's not about money. It's not about an easy life. It's about what fuels the fire, right? So I spent like two years post. So you would suggest to Emily, you'd say, in your self-trial life, discovery process, independent of where you arrive, understand the core ingredients that have been important for you through the sport process, and figure out how to go build or replicate or be part of those core elements in the next phase.

Bodymaster is brought to you by LinkedIn Jobs. If you've ever hired for a small business, you know the real cost isn't just the salary. It's the time that you lose when the fit is off, the momentum that stalls when that fit doesn't work. And that's the pressure of having to get it right while you're still running everything else. That's why I'm paying attention to LinkedIn hiring pro. It's built for the reality of hiring when you're operating lean. You describe the role in playing language and then hiring pro helps you draft the job post, surface the right candidates, and then narrow to a short list without turning hiring into another full-time job. And when applications start coming in, it doesn't leave you buried in resumes. It streamlines screening, including AI

powered interviews for initial conversations. How about that? So that you can spend less time, searching, and then more time connecting with the people who match what you need. With hiring pro, you can hire with confidence knowing you're getting the best talent for your business. In fact, those hiring with LinkedIn are 24% less likely to need to reopen a role within 12 months when compared to their leading competitor. Join the 2.7 million small businesses using LinkedIn to hire. Get started by posting your job for free at LinkedIn.com slash mastery. Again, that's LinkedIn.com slash mastery. Terms and conditions apply. Finding Mastery is brought to you by David Protein.

Nutrition is foundational to high performance and well-being. And being consistent with whole food choices is really important. Sometimes that's tricky, especially when you're on the go. One small practice that helps me on those types of days is having a smart, reliable nutrition option ready when I need it. And that's why I'm a big fan of David Protein bars. The gold bar is their flagship product, high protein density, great texture, and flavors that make it easy to stick with. The team here at Finding Mastery, they love it. They're just ripping through them in the Finding Mastery Lab.

Chocolate chip cookie dough and peanut butter seem to be their favorite go-toes. And for those who don't want to compromise performance, just because you're on a short time or in between meals, this is a solution that's worked incredibly well for me and the team here at Finding Mastery. They've built something with rigor and alignment that really stands out in a crowded, sometimes ambiguous space like nutrition. David bars are now available in major retailers like Walmart and Target.

And if you'd like to try them directly and get a special offer for being a finding mastery listener, head to Davidprotein.com slash finding mastery, where right now, if you buy four packs, you'll get the fifth for free. Again, that's Davidprotein.com slash finding mastery. I hope you'll check them out. And also as you transition out, you're going to fail. Likely, you're going to find things you don't want to do. And that is almost as important as finding what you want to do.

It's cool. Right. And just like for you, like you went into this field of psychology, right? It is miles and miles wide, right? And you found out what you didn't want to do in this field. And you found out where your sweet spot is. Yeah.

Right. And like you found out you didn't want to do those things by doing those things. You're right. And you know, I had a mentor that early on that said something really cool to me. She said the field of psychology is wide open. You can do anything you want in it. Like what do you want to do?

And she said, do you want to be kind of down the career transition? This is a pathway in psychology. Do you want to do transition? Do you want to do youth? Do you want to do? What do you want to do? I was like, I want to be around people that are kind of obsessed about getting better as I am. I was not healthy with that obsession. And she's like, oh, okay, let's probably like in the elite phase. And I go, I'm not interested in that. I'm more interested in being around people that I understand because that's how I'm living. Yeah.

Which happened to be some of the most extraordinary doers because they're all in on it. And I want to go back to one more piece for Emily. Is there a time, a time thing that you put on yourself? Like, how did you do the anxiety of, I don't know what I'm going to do next? I probably have a different approach than most. What'd you do? I just did what I know how to do. Just go face first into working hard.

Well, that's as an O line. That is what you do. What I do, right? What I know is I've always been programmed. Athletes are very programmed, meaning like, like you're always doing, right? You're always going, right? And I found that-

You say programmed, I think structured. Structured. Yeah, structure's a better word than- Yeah, like, meaning you know how to show up on time, you know how to bring your intensity and your focus to do the things. But you always had something. But, and one of the other dangers of sport

is for most stick and ball sport, you've got an adult telling you what to do. What to do? Which, okay, that's good as a, maybe a subordinate in a corporate environment, like you know how to take leadership in that way. But that's not what, You didn't do that.

No. Like, I just went and like, I need to be busy, right? I need to like. I see the, right? Like, there are these people like, oh, I'm going to take two years off. Right. And I think that is actually more, I believe it's more detrimental. Just go do, right?

Go get an internship. Go work for your friend. Go do something. And if it doesn't work, like, it doesn't work. You have to be okay with that because I think the space, right? Athletes aren't used to space. And then they spin and they're like, well, you know, like, I've talked to so many athletes. well, I don't, like, I want to do what you do, Jeff.

I'm like, you do know I retired over a decade ago. And this path to get to where I am today, where I am today looks super cool. This path was really hard. And I can't, like, you can't jump to starting middle linebacker, right, pro bowler to CEO of a company. Transitioning doesn't happen, right? Like, it came over time, right, of, like, grow. and grow and like, I don't know, like I find for me personally, putting myself in the mix helped.

Sitting back didn't help. And I found what I loved and that like while you're in the freight, in the washing machine, I found out, this is what I love, this way I don't. This is what I love, this way I don't. This is what I love, this is what I don't. I think if I would have taken a year and a half off, I would have been like, finance is a jam and I would have just delayed my evolution of what matters to me. When I hear that, I also hear that that is, you matched your process that fits best for you. Oh, yes. And time away could be best for somebody else. But they need to know, this is the value of self-discovery and the value of what I call psychology I think about is like the study of yourself. Yeah. You know, like that's one version of it. Like you got to know yourself.

And then if you think like, oh, I need time. Experiment with that. Or I need to be active. Experiment with that. Yeah. It doesn't mean it's right or wrong. It's like an intuition or thought and then follow that and run many experiments. Yeah. To figure that. Yeah. And so you ran. an active experiment. An active experience. Because I'm like, you're exactly right. Like I was the kid. Like I can't sit still.

Always busy. Like I have a very hard time. Like my gas pedal is typically on the floor. And it's been on the floor since I was a really, really little kid. And it's just like who I am. I love this. Do you, when you think about your identity now, do you feel like you've got clarity on that? I don't always, right?

I do feel at times I'm an imposter. Right? I'm like, why am I? Do I have the right to be here? have I done the things to earn this privilege, right? And for me, I think that's part of what also makes you a great athlete is like this, like, inner drive to be better, like, right? Like, it's not like self-doubt.

It's like, I got to earn it today. I need to earn it today. I got to earn it again and again and again and so I think as an identity of like, I think about where I'm at and the seat that I'm in, the success that I had. It's like, did I earn it? I know, got to earn it today. Right? It's like that I got to earn it every day.

Like nothing's given. and everything is earned. And it's like, man, can't believe I am where I'm in. And I've like, you know, like transitioned and have a really successful career in business. And did I earn it? Nope, got earned it today, right? Welcome to the club.

Yeah. You know, like this is not unfamiliar. Yeah. You know, for me too. I'm better at that now because I've been able to, with self-discovery practice, like what is this thinking about being a fraud? You know, what is that really about?

But anyways, okay. So. All right. Nice one. Thank you. Emily. Yeah, yeah. That was great. We went on a good one there. This one's anonymous. I'm a full-time working mom of two, and I've been married for 10 years. My relationship with my husband has turned into a roommate situation. I feel like I've put a lot of energy and work into my work, my marriage and my family. I'm not sure if I feel burnt out, but lately I have a feeling as I'm going through the motions. I feel like I'm lacking adventure

or the spark of something. I'm grateful for what I have to do in my life, but feel as if something is missing or I'm just on autopilot. I've done therapy, have been regularly journaling and been meditating. What advice can you give to someone that sometimes just feel stuck? Have you felt stuck? Yeah. Yeah. You do. You know, for me it's not stuck. It's like I feel like I get in the fog. Yeah, that's a good way to say. And sometimes that fog is really thick. And other times, like, I can see kind of my feet, you know, and sometimes like I just know I need to use my stuff. And sometimes, like, I just know I need to use my sense as well to navigate. A couple things that stick out for me in this question is she's working it. She's doing self-discovery work for therapy. The second thing, and so I'm painting this from my mind,

that's one element. The second element is that I don't know her age, but I would say that we need to take a look at make sure that there's not a biological piece happening here as well. There's also thyroid as a general. Anytime there's a malaise, I think that it's really important. I can't give advice in this way, but I can point to a couple indicators. On the therapy piece, The idea of having a comfortable place to go sit to do self-discovery is, I don't think it's right. It doesn't work for me that way. That's not how I work. I want to create a safe space to support and challenge somebody, to be their very best.

And it's more intense and it's more brief rather than enduring and ongoing. Now listen, that's one flavor of how to do it. But I would take a look at that and make sure that the relationship you have with your therapist is not a place that's comfortable to complain. that the therapist is actually not codependent in the way that they water and nurture the discussion of what's wrong. Now, I'm being a little inflammatory about psychotherapy, if you will, but I'm biased in the approach and how I work and what I've seen that fits my temperament and also fits the people that are ambitious in their life. Is it know them, understand their scars and tissues, their hopes and dreams, and really help them and you as well hold a standard for them to be their very best. And it is support and challenge. It is unconditional positive regard with a standard to do the work to become the person you want to be.

And then we kind of rotate that with as much moments of being fully you as you possibly can. It's a mouthful. But this is me pointing to, is the therapy doing you justice right now? And the second piece is I would run a program to make sure that your biological pieces are making sense. And there's not some sort of deficit. For example, my wife and I, we run two. blood test a year, call it a high performance blood draw. I'm sure you do the same or some variation of it. And what that does is it helps me know the choices that I'm making nutritionally and behaviorally

and psychologically, are they supporting from a blood draw standpoint? Is it working? Yeah. And so there's been phases where my omega-3s are, there's a deficit, which means that my my myelin sheath in my brain nervous system is compromised. That means that I'm not thinking the way I could. And, and and, and, heart health for amegas and and, and, so I think

that there's something important to take a look at there. And then there, also the third variable is like, feeling stuck, to me is a cousin

to hopelessness, is a cousin to like, not feeling as though that the person has the agency to make the change that they want. So either they don't see it,

like the change that they want, the compelling future, you know, that they're working towards, or they can see it and they feel like

they can't affect the change to make that happen. I don't think you relate to that. I think you are so high in agency. Actually, you're high in what's called efficacy. Agency is like, no, I'm going to choose. I choose.

And efficacy is a kind of psychological term for a sense of power. I feel powerful. So it's I choose and I think I can make something pretty special happen. So that efficacy rests on agency. Agency is, no, I choose. I'm going to do this thing. And efficacy is when I choose, and I apply myself to it,

good things happen. So how do you build efficacy? Well, according to Dr. Bendora, one of my mentors, I got to meet him before he passed and he was on the podcast, amazing human. He's got a handful of ways

that you increase efficacy. I'll put it in the show notes, unless you want to hear what those things are. But just really quickly, mental imagery, vicarious experience, arousal regulation,

and kind of being in the amphitheater of risk. Those are the handful of ways to increase efficacy. Yep. I resonate with what you said. Right? Like, I don't know if I ever been like, I'm stuck, right?

But I know people like this. Yeah, but you resonate with the fog piece. Like, it's not clear. Yeah. I'm a little unsettled. There's some anxiousness in. Yeah. I got to rely on some of my sensory information, my intuition.

Right. Because I can't see it. But I can't see it. But for me, right, I do some of the things that you just mentioned. Like, I just go. Yeah, you go. But when I see this and the people I know on this, I think.

we have such an overload of social media. This is what we're supposed to be or supposed to look like, right? Overall, that we as a society can sometimes paint a picture of who we should be versus who we want to be. Wait, I would, of course, correct that. I like what you just said. Yeah. But I would tune that one more, who we should be versus who we are. Who we are.

Because everything you need, this is the first principle for me, everything you need is already inside you. Yeah. you are already it. It's always available to you. Just like the sky is always available, you know, it's always there. Who you are is intimately on demand always available. Yeah. We get clouded.

Yep. And sometimes. So like, you know, the other thing is like, if I was to ask Anonymous, if Anonymous was with us right now, so I'd say, what do I need to understand about your life experiences? To understand why you feel stuck. like if I lived this is my another first principle if I lived the life unique life experiences that you had I probably feel stuck too so let me just understand what those things are and that in of itself with that type of information is really elumative and so maybe that's something anonymous

you can wrestle with a little bit like what are the things that have led to you feeling stuck and then maybe invest in the psychological skills training of the four factors of self-efficacy Yeah. Yeah. One of the things that can really help in this is just like not just talking to a therapist, talking to your partner, right? Talking to your friends, right? Like, hey, I'm feeling like we're in a rut, right? Like, I think that it gets you out. Like, I'm kind of clouded. We're not connecting. You know what happens when people feel stuck is they'll blame others. So I agree 1,000 percent. However, two things to caution. Yeah. Right. Is when you are talking to your others, you're reaching out. Yep. Be aware. that there's a difference between looking to be understood, and there's a difference between looking for solutions. Okay? And neither of them involve blaming or complaining. Yep. And so oftentimes when I feel helpless, powerless, like if I feel in that stuck state, which this is not a very common place, but there are triggers for me. I'm sure there are triggers for you too, is that I'm like, this is not me. It must be you. I'm at my worst when I do that.

And my wife right away, like if we're kind of in a throes of something, she's like, whoa, you know, what? You know, like, because we're both got that lying kind of thing about us. And so instantly I'm like, oh, yeah, look, I need to own my stuff. It is not anything you just said or did. And so that's this fast, you know what an oot loop is, right? Observe, orientate, decide act. As many ootel loops as we can do together, we're kind of in, I think, a more dynamic, healthy relationship. 100%.

Yeah. brought to you by Rag and Bone. I've been a big fan of Rag and Bone for a number of years. I just love what they do. It's a go-to for me when I'm choosing clothes. I've been wearing their infused denim for a while now. They've done just a really nice job with this product. For me, I am really intentional about what I invest in. In clothing, it's no different. I want things that are well made that stand the test of time that don't distract me, that support my focus on the things that matter most. And that's exactly why these deliver. And they look sharp, full stop. They've spent 20 years obsessed with getting this product right. And that kind of

of long-term commitment to craft, that's something we talk a lot about here at finding mastery. Quality compounds. The right inputs may consistently over time show up in everything, and you can feel that the moment you put these on. If you're ready to upgrade your denim with something that's genuinely built to last, head to ragdashbone.com and use the code finding mastery for 20% off your entire order. Again, that's rag dashbone.com, rag dash bone.com, and use the code finding mastery for 20% off. So anyways, cool stuff. All right, let's move to Ryan.

I'm having a hard time defining my purpose. I'm not completely directionless as I have a career and family, hobbies that I love. But when asked to define what it is that drives me, what it is that I can use to help guide me, I don't have a concrete answer. Any tips for how to help identify and define a purpose? Yeah, it's cool. I love this question. I think that this is one of the big rocks to get in a container to be a thriving human.

And so, and the research on it is really clear. You know, whether you look at the Harvard study, the 85 year old longitudinal Harvard study that said basically kind of to live a good life, there's two main variables, purpose and connection. All of relationships. Yeah. So it's less clear. When I read that and kind of some of the other work around, you know, being and becoming your very best, purpose keeps coming up. But there's no clear, I don't know, steps. Like it's, okay, the science is it has three components.

It matters to you. It's bigger than you. And it's out in front of you. Great. What do I do? How do I do that? This is going to sound cheeky for just a moment, but we built a course called purpose mindset. And it rests on three main variables that have a whole set of practices.

Okay. So what is your philosophy? That's different than purpose. Okay. Your philosophy, it's a clean way to identify your first principles in life. Every day is an opportunity to co-create a living master. And so my philosophy, if you break that apart every day, meaning today and tomorrow and yesterday, every day is an opportunity.

So see how I'm framing like life and challenges? It's an opportunity. What? To co-create together with other people, right? A living masterpiece. And a living masterpiece is something that is organic. It's right at the edge of, you know, it's this beautiful thing that we're putting together. So every day is an opportunity to co-create a living masterpiece.

That's my philosophy. Now that rests on a handful of values and first principles, and we explain this in the course how to do that. And then we also need to know what your vision is. What is the compelling future? We also help you support making a fundamental commitment. And then we walk you through how to take all of that information and put it into a purpose. Like what is your purpose? You can take the course.

I think it's a good bit of work, but also you need a pen and paper and you just go to work. And on those three variables, you say, what? really matters to me above all else. What is so compelling about my future that I'm willing to work toward it? And what are the first principles that are going to guide me as I go on this adventure? And you get kind of that stuff in whatever. And then you say, in the most convenient way possible, my purpose is. And I can answer that for you as well. It's to help people live in the present moment more often. Why? Because the present moment was where everything that's true, beautiful, and good are experienced. And so that is the key whole.

for me to be able to help people create a life of flourishing. So simple kind of process that sits underneath what I just said, but it takes time. Yeah. What I found personally is it refines over time. It gets tighter over time. And sometimes it changes, right? And I think about mine, it's like box. It's like, it just like keeps going. It's like, oh, yours is really tight. Right. And. But I've been working this thing for a long time. Exactly. But that's like, that's my advice to Ryan. Is it start somewhere. It's like, yeah. It can be like just you thinking about purpose is really important.

I love how you're honoring wherever somebody is in the path. Because we all start some, I don't know, like for me, like, I'm on different places in my journey everywhere. And one of the things that pisses me off the most is when somebody talks to me, right? And it's like, well, no, just be here. And I'm like, I don't even know where there is, right? You know what I want to also do is like, I want to reinforce what you're saying is like, we're all trying to just figure it out. And then we're at different stages.

And again, if I lived your life or I understood the most important shaping mechanisms, I'd understand where you are too. And a big part of doing life well is having people that understand each other and we're good teammates, good partners, you know, good friends. And I also think that the science also backs this

or the research around it backs this is that for purpose, it doesn't need to be grand and big. It doesn't mean that I need to do water wells in this country or I need to save children in this part of the world. And, you know, it doesn't need to be huge. It can be intimate and kind of more narrow in that respect. It just needs to be honest.

Again, purpose, it rests on, does it matter to you? Is it bigger than you? And is it something to work toward? Is it out in front of you? And, you know, I also want to say to Ryan, send me your email, and I'll send you the course, right? And so no cost. Yeah, no cost.

I just want to honor that there is a solution. And for people that can't afford it and people that don't want to pay for a course like this, get a paper and pencil out and answer some of the questions that we've just spoken about. And again, like, it's an evolution. It's a process. That's right. Right. And if you knew it right away, it wouldn't be, I mean, some people, like, I'm sure my sister has had something written down since she's 12 years old. Right. Right. That's who she is as a person. Yeah. But for me, the journey to get there is as or more important than it is to actually have that. So much so that, like let's give both of us space that you and I don't know what's going to happen in the next

kind of 10 minutes or the next day. Yeah. And something so radical in our life could take place that it would fundamentally shift our purpose. Yes. And this could be a trauma or it could be something that is benevolent. Keep it open. Yeah. A lot can you happen.

Yeah, a lot can't. Keep it open. Yeah. Yeah. Next one is Laurel. As a long time active duty military spouse, still my three professional. Professional and personal drivers are people place and purpose. We've lived around the globe, moved 23 times, dang, and Gardner perspective most could only imagine.

My lifelong question is, what does community mean today? Finding community, joining a community, sports, military, professional, it has to go beyond the digital realm. And would that fix most things for all of us? What does community mean today? No, I don't think it fixed. it's a necessary component, but not the only. You know, there's more to life. But when I hear community, the question is,

what does community mean today? I think that's a philosophical question more than anything. Yeah. But for me, to make it more first principle base, community is the artifact, if you will, of the relationships. So the way that we relate to each other and the way that we are relating to a shared way of living is really what community is.

And so I make it more simple to say, what is your relationship with yourself? What is your relationship with your people? And do you have a bunch of people that are kind of interested in the same thing? That's a community. What I'm in control of is the way that I am relating to myself so that I can be a great teammate, a great partner, a great friend to other people. And if we're interested in the same things, now we call that a community.

Yeah. So it could be digital. Yeah. I don't think a community means being interested in the same things. What do you think it means? When I think about the lack of community, some people may have, and I think we have in society. It's a dehumanization of our fellow man or woman, right? Say that again. Like, that's a big idea. When you think a community, you think of. I think of people that you have a responsibility to,

and you are more alike than different then. And when I think about, like, communities and whether you're religious or not, one of the greatest things about churches that created community, right? And what it finds is, like, we're all more alike than we are different. Democrat, Republican, you're way more alike than that person that has very opposing views, right? You care about more of the same things when you dig deep down into it, then you don't. And I think the dehumanization of people, right, the demonization of like, oh, you're not like me. You think differently than me. Whatever it may be is a very dangerous slippery slope that breaks community. Because when you think back of like community is this support system that we have, this accountability that we have to people around us, right? This

inherent sense of belonging, right? It's not about you and me liking each other or you and me having similar hobbies. I don't believe, like, that's friendship. Cool. I like what you're doing. Community is, oh, there's an elderly person that needs help. We help them, right? Community is this person, right, it's going through a hard time. Yeah, I'll pick your kids up from sports, right? And we could vote differently. We could fundamentally disagree. But like, I go through a hard time. too, like some people need help, right? And it's like this sense of building and the people that have, give and the people that don't have, right, will have at some point, right? And they give on there. So I think we are dehumanizing each other in society versus we're all more alike than we are

different. We all have struggles. We all like, and if we just sit down and have conversations, we all get better. I like this responsibility giving piece, belonging as elements to how you're defining community. And so some of the most ancient of practices you've just described them. I do think the community for me, there's a reason to be part of the community that I think on the surface it sounds like,

oh, we all like, I don't know, basket weaving. Yeah. Yes. And there's a reason why it exists. Yeah, whether it's like a geogynism or Christianity or Islam or whatever. And then you go kind of up four levels and talk about global community.

But all that being said is Laurel moved, 23 times. I don't want to miss that because that means she's really good at knowing how to fit in and be part of something and or like what she likes, what she doesn't like. There's a unique thing about moving 23 times that of course she's calling for community. And I hear maybe Laurel, you didn't have a felt community or maybe you got to be parts of lots of communities. I don't know that part of it. But there's an embedded question about the in-person piece. And I don't want personally, but just the digital community. I like it. There's parts of it I really do like. I know that there's another aspect of the in-person, neurochemistry, the eye contact, all of that

stuff that is, I need it. So I don't know where Laurel, you're going with that piece. Do you have a thought on this, Jeff? I think it was a very philosophical question. And like, even Laurel, you say it must go beyond the digital realm. And what I just heard you say is you 100% are. agree. I do too. We are social beings. It's how we evolved, like it or not, right? Touch, feel, breath. Those things matter, right? And when there's a screen that divides you, digital should enhance community, I believe. It should never be community. Well, let me point, counterpoint. I agree. Just for clarity. But there are folks that are so overwhelmed by in-person experiences that they struggle to be part of a community because of the overwhelming nature of being in person. Yep. You know,

for lots of reasons. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, high cortical arousal or trauma or, you know, whatever. So there is like this great benefit to a... A hundred percent. Yeah. So I think for the most part, though, the slide towards digital as opposed to the slide towards in person is not the right slide. Yeah, there's always the exception and where things really work for some people. Right. And if you're one of those people, it's amazing. right because you probably used to be very lonely right and like that's so powerful but everything is a balance in life you know one last piece is you're really good at community your business you guys work out together so you and your employees work out together like community matters to you so i really

i really appreciate how you've kind of rounded out this piece of it thanks yeah on this vince has a good one as the next one that's talk about digital with the focus on ai are we taking our eye off the ball on the importance of human potential and mindfulness for the sake of machine learning. I don't know. Somebody who's embraced AI, right, but also believes deeply in the human being. Some of the work I've done with, let's call it, one of the largest tech firms in the world is be an agitator for you have a responsibility to use AI for human good. And so this is not a new thought, but there's such an overwhelming sense that if you're not

figuring out how to use AI that you're falling behind. You know, like, I don't know. Incredible fear. Yeah. Yeah. I see it from my team. From a business operator. You know.

Yeah. Now is like a really important time to be tuned to what AI can do. It's coming. It's here. It's still more to come. And this is the way we're thinking about it right now is how do we democratize or socialize what we know to be the best practices for people to become? You know, so that's an important thing that here at Finding Mastery we're paying attention

to. how do we use AI benevolently for good? And also internally, how do we use AI to be good thought partners for us? And the concern that we have is most of the AI models right now are designed to affirmatively please. Yeah. And you know, you really need to make sure that it is scrubbing the ideas honestly, as opposed to like just favorably coming up with a convenient answer. So I don't know. I think that if we are not paying attention to best practices to be our very best, that we're missing the foundational step in the process. To be part of something bigger is a foundational first principle step.

So I'm not overly concerned about like is AI, are we taking the ball off of AI for human potential? Rather, how are we using this new tool to enhance the potential? Yeah. How I see AI, you can put a giant list of all the things that are wrong with it from environmental to jobs. AI is here. Right.

And it's a tool. no different than, you know, the iPhone, no different than the PC, no different than an automobile, a weapon system. Railroads, industrial revolution. They can be used for good. And they also will be used for bad, right? Like, AI will be used for bad things, for sure, because there are people out there that are not good intentions, etc.

Reminder that the majority of people, when given the opportunity, act in good faith. A hundred percent. Yeah. So that research, just for folks that are like, overwhelmed by what bad actors, the majority of people will do the quote unquote right thing to fit in with society and social norms. But the outsized impact of a bad actor with this type of tool is actually really, really dangerous. I think about is it taking our eyes off the ball of the

importance of human potential of mindfulness? I am hopeful, right? When I reread this question, I think AI has the potential to allow us to maximize our potential more. than ever before, but also maximize our mindfulness, right, on there, because it allows us to do things so much faster that maybe it gives us more time to have a meditative practice. Cool. Maybe it gives us more time to build community, right? Like, that's how I want to look at it. I like it.

Yeah. It's not more free time. It's time to invest in other ways. We can't make more time. Yeah. Right? Yeah. But it's like, I think about the things that I do in my life.

And I'm like, man, but like go back 30 years ago, right? And the things that people did just to live were very different than we have now. AI can be a huge privilege and a multiplier for us as humans, right? My bigger concern is how do we think about jobs, employment? Because that is a real implication of like, are we just going to wipe out everybody's job that lives in accounting right now? No, I don't think it's going to happen yet. I don't see it. It's like, but the people need to know.

how to use this tool. It's not a replacement yet. Yet. You know, like, yeah. But one thing I just want, you use word privilege and I just want to be super thoughtful about that because it is a tool. There's a cost to this tool. There's a divide of people that can afford it, that cannot.

And, you know, let's call it, I don't know, 30 years ago when we started to be a lot smarter about nutrition. There was health food and junk food still is now. And there's a divide. There's like a socioeconomic strata. between the wealthy could afford health food. They got to choose junk food, let's say. Yeah.

And so junk food, health food, okay. Obviously we want health, okay? But if you can't afford it, or it's not available or it's hard to get to, it's problematic for the kind of health of that family. That now it's not junk food. Yeah, yes. There's an extension though, junk light and healthy light.

Junk light is all the blue stuff. It's all the screen stuff. It's the indoor stuff. And I think there's going to be a divide that is going to be more noticeable that the rich, the wealthy, are going to have more healthy light, more sunlight. They're going to be outside more. There's something about health light and junk light that I'm tuning to. And there's also the other divide, and I don't have a neat four by four, if you will, but there's another divide which is access to this technology. of tools that we've talked to Olympic athletes, top executives, elite military teams, and artists

at the peak of their craft. In this course, you'll learn the foundational psychological skills to be your very best, full stop. And the best part is, you can start any time. To get started, head to finding mastery.com slash course and use the code mastery to get $50 off your registration. Again, go to finding mastery.com slash course and use the code mastery because your future isn't shaped by what you intend. It is shaped by what you train. Finding Mastery is brought to you by AG1. Spring is, it's just a natural time to reset. You know, the days are getting longer, at least for the Northern Hemisphere.

And there's just an energy in the air that shifts. There's a kind of pull to simplify for me to recalibrate what's working, what isn't. And one area I come back to regularly is my daily routine. It's not about overhauling it, but it is about scrubbing the material of it, to really making sense of why I'm doing what I'm doing. So I look at it all. and I re-examine it. AG1, it's been one of those foundations for me for over a decade now. I'm still using it. I like what they're doing. What I appreciate most is how much it simplifies the equation.

One scoop covers a lot of ground. They've got some multivitamins in there, and more than anything, it's the pre and probiotics that I appreciate that they've done. It's all in one glass of water. So if you're taking a bunch of supplements, you don't have that pill fatigue that so many people talk about. I'm traveling a lot right now for our corporate clients. that means shifting time zones and schedules. That's when consistency really helps. The AG1 travel packs, they've been a game changer for me. I throw a few in my bag and I don't have to think twice about it.

I'm giving my body what it needs to keep showing up for work, for the people I care about, for the long game, really. Visit drinkag1.com slash finding mastery to get an AG1 flavor sampler and a bottle of vitamin D3 plus K2 free in your welcome kit with your first AG1 subscription. That's a $72 value for free. Again, that's drinkag1.com slash finding mastery. All right, last question here. Lindsay, this is a good one.

This is a really good one. And I'm interested to hear your answers. Who and what are your idols and inspirations and influences growing up? And how have those changed as an adult? It's cool. I didn't have idols. I didn't have heroes. I don't know uniquely exactly how that came to be.

but I remember very clearly. It was the fourth grade experience. I was playing soccer. It was a end of year banquet, and it was all of the soccer kids in the area came. And Mark Mosley, I think, was the name of the kicker for the Washington Redskins. It was a long time ago.

Okay, this was like early 80s. And there was a big lineup afterwards. He did his autograph. And my dad was like, hey, let's get in line. And I said, I have no interest. He goes, Mike, like, this is one of the, you know, and my dad loved the Redskins, now called Washington commanders.

And I had zero interest. And I remember standing in line, I was like, what does he care so much about this other man? Like, yeah, good. He's good at what he does. And I remember a young age, like in an off-axis, counterculture, nearly defiant way, like, that's not me. I'm not interested in that way. And I wasn't saying my dad was love slobbing in any way over this. But he thought it was cool for his kid to, you know, maybe get a gem of wisdom from somebody that's really skilled.

And so I will tell you, growing up, my parents, I grew up in a Christian family where we were, Catholic. And so I came to understand Jesus in a really cool way. And I was kind of spoon fed it growing up. And then I went to a Jesuit university. And so Jesuits are a particular, it was Loyola the Merrimount for undergrad. And they are intense. They are the academicians of the Catholic faith. And point blank, they said to me to the class, they're like, so what's this thing about eating fish on Fridays during Lent? What is that about? And, And so the studious would say, oh, it's this or it's, you know, it's because of that tradition. And he goes, wait, hold on.

Who do you think own the wharf? Do you think had anything to do with the bishop's uncle? What do you think? Who made that rule that on Friday you eat fish? Who benefited from that? So I started going, oh, well, hold on. There's a whole human structure to quote unquote religion. And what I had that?

They really talked about that? Oh, dude. That is fascinating. Straight up every practice principle. they really made me examine. Like, why is the church established this? Where does it come from? Is it right?

I don't know. Like, they're radicals. The Jesuits are radicals. They're very smart, very academic, very rebellious. And they've got to checkered history themselves. So there's a long way for me to get to, I think the most significant human that has walked to our planet is Jesus. There's 100,000 books written in just the U.S. language about his biography.

That's a lot. Yeah. Okay. X number of billion people say, yeah, you got some stuff right. And I like learning about what you did. So I think that that is a muse that is worth investigating and understanding. Even if you don't say, I believe, but you say I'm curious about what did this person represent and how did they design their life.

To me, I am inspired by the people that have created real change. Buddha did some cool stuff. Confucius did some real stuff. You know, like I'm inspired by those folks. And those are the ones I'm way more interested in understanding and thinking about how they designed their life, how they thought, how they chose their words, and how they behaved, and the communities that they shaped. Thoughts, words, and actions, community.

Are those the four variables? And so I'm still into those great kind of movers of culture. And how's it changed? It hasn't really changed. I just see it a little bit differently than I once did as a spoon-fed person. Now is somebody that has really scrubbed the thinking. around the fallibility and the flaws in all of the systems. But I'm not caught by that.

I'm inspired by it. So I hope that's not too heady or too serious. And I'm on my journey with it as well. Now, I think you probably had a different response than that. I think you probably had heroes and idols. Yeah. But like, yeah, give it to me. That was an awesome response.

I'd never thought about, right, Jesus, that way. Right, right, of being like a hero or an idol or whatever, you know, of like, and listening to you talk, right? Like, I grew up in the Catholic Church as well. I didn't expect it to go that way. And I love it when I don't expect things. Right? And it drives my curiosity in here of like, man,

thinking about how that and my faith have shaped me to think about community, which we talked about. Yeah. To think about impact in the world, right? And to think about whether you believe or not, the books about Jesus is he was the greatest leader of all time, probably. I mean, think about what the community he's real. and what he led and how, right, like how it's written about him of like he gave, he always did, right?

He put others in front of him, right, like that type of leadership. You know what? One note on him, he was a radical. Yeah. He got killed because of his radical ideas pushing against power. Yeah. He is off-axis counterculture. And that to me, I'm like, damn, about it.

And then his 12, the disciples, if you will, they were part protectors. And they were, they were rebels. Yeah. They were like, they were the oddballs. They were the misfits. And I'm like, man, his ideas were so honest and pure and connected that there was a real community, a real thing. I'm like, that's amazing. Yeah.

I mean, just when you think about it from a leader perspective. Yeah. I like, you know, the influence that one man had. Well, how about Sid Arthur? Sidartha had it all. Buddha had it all. Okay. And he was living in the temple with a high, like he never saw dirt or not dirt, but the trash in the streets.

And then one day, you know, he's like, wait, what is all of this kind of pain that I'm And then he radically goes on a self-discovery journey adventure. Come on, that off-axis, counterculture, revolutionary, be about something. And if you're not sure what it is, go invest in it. That honest commitment, the fundamental commitment. When people ask me, like, what's a secret? There's no secrets. But what's a secret for high performance?

It's a fundamental commitment. Yeah. Yeah, it's a fundamental commitment. All right. Sorry, we went down that. I definitely had sports heroes. Yes. Right?

Like, and I'll say that, like, I try, like, the 90s, right? Like, and I lived in the Midwest, like, there's nobody other than Michael Jordan, right? And he's the greatest of all time. Don't care what you say. Um, on there. And so I remember sitting in my parents room, like, keeping stats of Michael, like how many assists he had, how many, like when I was 10 years old, like my boy's age, I remember like sitting there. And what I drove from that was like he was relentlessly great. And like, I, you know, really just loved that effort that he always had and that's something that resonated with me. As an adult, when you look at how his life is now and like knowing what you know now,

do you have that same feeling about? Oh, yeah. I mean, I would say like how we practiced and all that. Like I thought a lot about that in my youth of like, how did I show up at practice? Did I work hard? Did I push others to be better and all of that? When I look now, I'm like, yeah, I don't know if like how and why he was driven and the choices he made of what I do. He really shaped me as an athlete, right, and taught me.

like how to practice, how to show up and all those things. And then, you know, growing up, you know, I want to be like my dad. I want to be my dad. And I realize I don't want to be my dad. Right. I love my dad and he's a great human, but that is not who I am. And there's a lot that I've learned from him as a whole. And so he was a huge role model and teacher, right?

He taught me a lot of things I don't want to do. Still does. Right. And how I want to show up differently in the future. And I think that's an incredible gift. And he's an amazing human. But there's a lot that I'm like, I don't want to do that. Yeah, that was good for him or that.

That was the choices he made. And right, another huge influencer portion of my life is Pete Carroll. I know. And like we share Pete. And you're an adult. I was a adult. I mean, 18 to 24. Yeah.

I spent six years with Pete. I was a two-time captain. Spent a lot of time seeing the inner workings of it. And I think I was really lucky. In my last three years at USC, I was going through grad school. So I had a very different perspective. And that's when I was a captain. And I was really like, I was in, you know, like leadership courses in grad school.

and like really thinking about and watching Pete lead and his system and his approach to that. And also, I really got to see, I look back and I see so much purpose in Pete. Like I remember Pete going out at night going into Compton or South Central and like he realized he had a really unique platform as a head coach of USC to potentially change somebody's life. And that he had an obligation if he could change somebody's life to change it. Like, I'm going to go out at two in the morning, even though we have practice the next day, and maybe I can help, right, do a ride along with some LAPD and pull a kid off the street and make that kid's life better. And I saw him not just coaching humans.

I saw him trying to make better humans and teaching people life skills through football, but beyond it to be better contributors to society, which I take a lot. So when I think, like, young kid was really Michael Jordan. And that was just because I love sports and basketball and all of that. My dad has had a huge influence in my life. And then Pete Carroll really helped shape a lot of how I think about leadership and team. And now I'm really inspired by those that have a ton of privilege and give it all away. I'm really inspired by those who aren't afraid to check their privilege card and put it in the line for somebody else who might not as a whole.

because a true worth of a man is not what's in their wallet, right? It's the impact they have and the happiness they spread. And I remind myself that a lot. And I'm of the most privileged class you ever could be. And I want to make sure that I'm able to be better and do better. And so the people that I see around me that are willing to give and give and give and not accumulate, accumulate, accumulate. It's something that I'm inspired by. And we all have different things to give.

It could be wealth. It could be your skills and expertise. It could be your love, all those things. So that's where I'm really right now inspired by other people doing that. That was fun, man. Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. And great reminder of your first principles and the foundations you're working from.

Yeah. These are great. And I just, uh, I love that you're doing these AMAs. Ask Mike Anything is what I'm going to call. Not ask me anything. I also just like applaud everybody who writes in. Yeah, me too. It's such an important step in who you are is to be able to articulate what things you aren't

sure about and have fears or need to work on as a whole. Like, I take that back from my sports world. If like, if you're like, oh, I'm good, nothing, you're never going to be, you're never going to get better. Right. And the first thing you need to be coachable is like the thing I love, like all these people are trying to be coachable. And being coachable is so important. That's right. Yeah, we should thank them again. And I love our community. They're awesome. They hold a standard and they're great learners. And so, Jeff, thank you. Thank you for sharing your time and your expertise, and thank you for sharing the partnership that we're able to have together Momentous and Finding Mastery, it matters to us. And so we're stoked to be able to kind of do our

best to prop what you're building. Awesome. So we appreciate it. Yeah, this was fun. Thank you, Mike. Next time on Finding Mastery, Charles Duhigg is back. Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and best-selling author of The Power of Habit and Supercommunicators. At a time when friends, families, and entire countries are struggling to communicate. He breaks down why so many of us are talking past each other and how the real issue isn't what we're saying, but the type of exchange we think we're in. From navigating tough moments at home and work to recognizing when someone needs to be heard, helped or simply understood, this episode offers a practical framework to connect more effectively. Join us Wednesday, May 13th at 9 a.m. Pacific, only on Finding Mastery.

All right. Thank you so much for diving into another episode of Finding Mastery with us. Our team loves creating this podcast and sharing these conversations with you. We really appreciate you being part of this community. And if you're enjoying the show, the easiest no-cost way to support is to hit the subscribe or follow button wherever you're listening. Also, if you haven't already, please consider dropping us a review on Apple or Spotify. We are incredibly grateful for the support and feedback. If you're looking for even more insights, we have to be able to be.

a newsletter we send out every Wednesday, punch over to finding mastery.com slash newsletter to sign up. The show wouldn't be possible without our sponsors and we take our recommendations seriously. And the team is very thoughtful about making sure we love and endorse every product you hear on the show. If you want to check out any of our sponsor offers you heard about in this episode, you can find those deals at finding mastery.com slash sponsors. And remember, no one does it alone. The door here at Finding Mastery is always open to those looking to explore the edges and the reaches of their potential so that they can help others do the same. So join our community. Share your favorite episode with a friend and let us know how we can continue to show up for you.

Lastly, as a quick reminder, information in this podcast and from any material on the Finding Mastery website and social channels is for information purposes only. If you're looking for meaningful support, which we all need, one of the best things you can do is to talk to a licensed professional. So seek assistance from your health care providers. Again, a sincere thank you for listening. Until next episode, be well, think well, keep exploring.