Finding Mastery with Dr. Michael Gervais - Lt. Col. Jannell MacAulay on the Air Force, Parenting, Health

Episode Date: November 30, 2016

Lieutenant Colonel Jannell MacAulay is currently the Commander of the 305th Operations Support Squadron at Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst in New Jersey. She leads a joint team responsible for supporting rapid global mobility to missions ranging from in-flight refueling to combat operations to humanitarian relief. In This Episode: -Why she chose to go to the Air Force academy -Parents instilling from an early age that there were no limits-Rules based vs. value based thinking -The moment she reached a burnout point -Learning to be ok with the imperfect-Her constant battle with finding balance in her life -Why teamwork and self-love are imperative for her -What defines strong leadership -Being motivated by seeing others do well -How she defines success_________________Subscribe to our Youtube Channel for more powerful conversations at the intersection of high performance, leadership, and meaning: https://www.youtube.com/c/FindingMasteryGet exclusive discounts and support our amazing sponsors! Go to: https://findingmastery.com/sponsors/Subscribe to the Finding Mastery newsletter for weekly high performance insights: https://www.findingmastery.com/newsletter Download Dr. Mike's Morning Mindset Routine! https://www.findingmastery.com/morningmindsetFollow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, and X.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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And this is, I say in the podcast that I'm not really, or in the conversation, I'm not really sure how she's been able to do what she's done. So she has an undergraduate degree in biology. She has a master's degree in exercise phys. And then she also holds a PhD in strategy, specializing in leadership and human performance. So she's also a yoga instructor. She also has a deep mindfulness practice. She's married. And as she refers in her relationship to a relationship that her husband is also deployed. And so they also have two children. And so raising the two children with a husband being away and she's got her hands full on it. So this is a great conversation about how.

How to be able to do much and excel and the challenge inside of that. So I hope you love this conversation. We start off the conversation by me trying to understand, you know, how does the government structure of military work in her command? And she runs the 305th Division, the Air Force Support Squadron or Operation Support Squadron at Joint Base McGuire-Dix in Lakehurst, based out of New Jersey. So I love this conversation. It is fresh of breath air to remember that we are all in the trenches trying to just

figure it out. She's got all the titles that you can imagine, and she's doing the same thing that we're doing. So with that in mind, I want to jump right into it and introduce you to Lieutenant Colonel Janelle McCauley. Janelle, how are you? I'm good. I'm good. Thanks for having me. Oh yeah, for sure. I'm looking forward to this. And one of the reasons is because I don't know anybody that has dedicated their life to the craft that you have and excelled in the craft. So I'm super excited to be able to learn and see if we can translate in some kind of way where

it makes sense, at least for the two of us, how you've been able to do what you've been able to do. And then hopefully others can play along with us as well. All right. It sounds good. Yeah. Okay. So we first met not that long ago. And it was at a conference. Yeah. Okay. So we first met, um, not that long ago it was, and it was at a conference and we're put together by a mutual friend. Um, can you take a quick stab at, uh, how you, I don't know, I guess, capture what you do. And I'm sure there's a very clear, uh, definition that you have, but I'm, I'm looking more for that, the concrete, but also like really the essence of what you've done over your career. Okay. Well, basically right now I'm currently the commander of the 305th Operations Support Squadron at McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst in New Jersey, where I'm a lieutenant colonel, active duty in the Air Force.

And I lead a team of folks that we run two different airfields here. We do all the air traffic control, the air crew flight equipment. We run a formal training unit for the KC-10 tanker air refueling aircraft. We've got intelligence teams, tactics teams, air traffic control and landing systems teams, as well as training and a bunch of different shops that kind of keep the support mission for this base going. And that support mission is to all of the many aircraft missions that fly overseas or even in the local area to kind of serve in our nation's defense. So that's kind of what I'm doing now. How I got here was, you know, I went to the air force Academy, um, for college and, um, chose to be a pilot as my career field. And then since then I've flown a couple of different mobility

aircraft, the, uh, C 21, which is a Learjet. I flew DVs all over Europe and Africa. What is it? What is a DV? Uh, DV a distinguished visitor. Oh, okay. Got it. Yeah. So we'd fly kind of dignitaries and generals all over the place. And then I flew C-130s, which is a four propeller plane. I'm sure you've probably seen photos of it. And it's kind of the workhorse of the Air Force. We spent a lot of time airlifting at a tactical level cargo and troops. And most of the time when I flew that back in the, um, like Oh four to Oh seven timeframe was, um, doing that mission over in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Would I have been on one of those before? If I was, if I, um, was landed on a carrier, was that not on a, Nope, Nope, Nope, not in a carrier yet. So the Navy, um, fly some smaller, um, aircraft, probably the C2 is what you flew onto the carrier. The C-130, we need. Now, we can land in dirt. We can land in mud. Oh, are they? Okay, C-130 are really large?

They're pretty big. Yeah, okay. Okay. And what do you carry inside of those? So normally, our standard configuration would be 52, 56 passengers actually in two pallets is kind of the, and that's kind of what we did most of our time in Iraq and Afghanistan. That's, uh, we're kind of a troop hauler, um, in the combat, um, area of operations. Okay. So somehow you left off that you've got, um, you've got an advanced degree in exercise phys from Penn State, if I remember correctly. And you've also got a doctorate in strategy and human performance.

Is that close? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that's pretty close. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, it's pretty cool. The Air Force is this great organization where you have a primary duty and a primary skill

set, but under one organization, they do allow you the opportunities to get educated to kind of branch out and do some other things. I worked at the in the Pentagon in the DC area for a few years, working actually in chemical weapons, if you can believe it. So yeah, so I've got to have this breadth of experience and a great career that the Air Force has kind of allotted. Okay, let's hold that one because I have no idea what that even means or what it's like to work at the Pentagon. Okay, so let's hold that for just a moment because I want to try to get my head around first. Remind me again of the chain of command, I think is the word I'm looking for, the phrase I'm looking for in the Air Force.

So, Lieutenant Colonel, where is that ranking? And I remember when you first shared it to me, I was like, okay, so you've done some work to climb the ranks. Walk us through from the top person in the org chart to where you are. Okay. So, we're civilian controlled by the Secretary of the air force, which who works for the secretary of defense. And then from there we have a chief of staff of the air force, who's our top military four star. And then we're kind of separated into, you know, like the combat, we call them combatant commanders who are those that do the war fighting and have the combatant commands all over the world. And then we've got the, you know, the staffs and the air services that, um, our headquarters staff that kind of do a lot of the educating training and equipping. Um, and so that's kind of how we're organized. And then what my unit does, you know, I'm squadron commanders are usually at the major and lieutenant colonel

level. So right around anywhere from like the 15 to 20 year point of service for most individuals. Okay. So at about 15 to 20 years, if you're skilled and good at what you do, you move up to a lieutenant or lieutenant colonel, I'm sorry, lieutenant colonel ranking. Is that what I'm hearing? Yeah. Okay. So, so how large is the squadron in there? And how large is the 305th operations the squadron? How large is the 305th Operation Support Squadron? Yours. My squadron, yeah. So my squadron has about 400 personnel, and that includes civilians as well as our airmen. And then I kind of have – so I know I'm going to complicate things a little bit more for you.

I actually have a very unique job in that I work at a joint base. And joint means we're represented by more than just one service. So I actually have two soldiers and about 50 sailors that work for me as well in my squadron. Okay. Okay. And what are the two primary? The joint is Air Force and something else? Well, here at this base, it's Air Force, Navy and Army all together. Oh, it's all together. That's right. Okay. And then who, so it's joint base, McGuire, Dix and Lakehurst. Yes. And so who is McGuire, Dix and Lakehurst? You know what, McGuire was, you know, a World War II hero, an ace. And then I actually don't know where Dix came from, Fort Dix,

but it's been around a while. And then I know Lakehurst, you know where the Hindenburg crash? That is exactly where Lakehurst is. Oh, got it. Okay. Yeah. All right. Okay, good. So it's a little quick little context for me, which I think is helpful because I get confused. And I think that like the matrix org chart inside the military is confusing to me. And so I appreciate that quick tutorial.

Yeah, Healthy Life. And so I can't begin to conceptualize how you've organized and you're married and you have a young child, right? Yeah, two kids. Two kids. I can't begin to kind of get my head around how you've done this. So maybe what we can do is begin at the beginning of why you chose, and maybe this will reveal in some kind of way of, of like your internal makeup, but why did you choose right out of high school to go to Air Force Academy? Okay. Actually, that's kind of an interesting story. So when I was a kid, my dad, I grew up

in Southern California, very humble beginnings. My dad was a police officer. My mom was a kid, my dad, I grew up in Southern California, very humble beginnings. My dad was a police officer. My mom was a nurse, very much servants to our community. And we kind of, I kind of grew up with this work hard, play hard philosophy, always kind of challenging myself to be the best. And my dad kind of instilled that in me. And, you know, when he would talk to people, he would tell them from when I was a very young child that I was going to grow up to be a submarine warfare commander or a fighter pilot. And that's what anyone who would listen, he would, he would tell them how I was

going to grow up to do this and be in the military. And, and my grandfather had been in the Marine Corps and my uncle as well had flown. Actually, he flew President Reagan in Marine One. And so I've always been kind of around aviation and around the military and really understood kind of the idea of being committed to being a patriot to our nation. And then when my dad would say those things, you know, the neat thing about it was at that time in the 80s, I couldn't be a submarine warfare commander or a fighter pilot as a woman. You know, those weren't even available to us. Yet, you know, my dad would still just instill in me that, you know, there were no limits. I could do whatever I, you know, wanted to do in the future.

And that's kind of how I grew up with kind of that competitive edge and that thought that I didn't have any limitations on who I wanted to be or what I could do. Okay. So how old are we talking about for you? This was when I was probably from about, you know, 10 years old on, even, you know, kind of through high school. And I was not, you know, I was athletic, but I, you know, was a competitive baton twirler. And, um, it sounds funny. I'm sure you were really good at it. You know, there is a whole, um, competitive baton twirling, um, you know, world out there, but, uh, it is for real. It is. I've never been exposed to it. It is a practice every day after school kind of dedication. I got to meet someone there.

Yeah, there you go. So yeah, I always kind of grew up with that competitive nature. And when my dad would say those things, I kind of believed him, even though at the time it wasn't even possible. Did you know it wasn't possible? I have this image of you being like 10 years old and looking up at your dad. And I don't know if I have the age right yet, but looking up at your dad and him talking to another adult, kind of patting you on the head saying, you know, one day my daughter is going to turn into this. And is that close to being right?

That's pretty close. Yeah. And so when you were looking up at your dad and what do you remember? Bring me back to the age or bring us back to the age. And even if that comes to mind really crisply, I'd love to learn what that was like for you. inspiration that I felt, the idea that there were no bounds on what I wanted to do in the future. And if you talk to people that know me now, I don't take no for an answer. It's one of those things that it may take longer to get to yes, or we may have to take an unconventional route. But I think that's really what I remember most

is kind of embodying back then from what my dad taught me. Is that one of the things that you do really well is that tenacious, dogged perseverance? Is that one of your, I don't know, superhuman powers? I don't know if I would call it a superhuman power, but it's definitely, I think, something that drives me. And, you know, I kind of try to do that for other people. You know, those people that I mentor and those people that work for me try to kind of instill in them that if they have those dreams, if they have those

passions and desires, then, you know, they should continue to strive for them. And maybe one route is not going to get them to where they want to go, but that doesn't mean that there's not another one that's waiting for them to, you know, to find and journey on. Okay. So you, okay. So hard work is the thing that helps put fuel on the passion, the thing that you care most about. And then are you clear about what that is for you now? And I imagine it's changed over the years, but I know I'm kind of leapfrogging. Maybe let's just stay back to when you were entering into, oh, you know, geez, I got so many thoughts. So sorry. Okay, so let's start in order. Why did you want to go into the Air Force? Because your dad kind of primed you in that direction, but then there was something that you took the baton and ran with as well. I did. I did. And this is actually kind of a funny story. Um, you know, so I grew up with that whole idea that I could go into the military potentially,

that I wasn't always an option. I went to air shows. It was something that I definitely thought about that would be kind of a neat job or a career. But to be perfectly honest, you know what I really wanted to do? And you can read back into my youth memory books that I wanted to be a doctor that worked with a pro sports team. Not even joking. Come on. Not even joking. You could ask my parents. Yes. I wish I could say I wanted to be a pilot because that'd be really fun. But I'm sure. That actually would be funny. Yeah yeah i'm sure at some point i did but it didn't go that direction so you wanted to be a what type of doctor working with the team actually i wanted to be like an orthopedic surgeon that was kind of where my yeah what kind of my vision and my passion i was kind of into um physical therapy and how the body worked even even back even back in high school, that, that definitely fascinated me. What was your undergraduate degree in? Biology. Biology. Okay. So you're,

you're on the right path there. Uh, yeah, for sure. And so then you went, why, why the Air Force? Because of the, because of the armed forces? Um, well, part of it was, you know, I wanted to find a way to serve and, and find a way to kind of connect with my community. And I thought being a doctor would be one way to do that. But I also saw what my grandfather did and the amount of service and my uncle as well, the pride that they had in giving back and being able to go out and do these, these awesome missions around the world and see the world. And, and so that kind of also inspired me to want to join the Academy. But if I'm, you know, being perfectly honest, there were, there was a conversation I distinctly remember having same kind of thing as when I was a little kid, my dad talking to a bunch of my friends, this time

it was in high school. And a bunch of them are saying things like, Oh, my gosh, I don't think Janelle could go to a military Academy. I just I just don't think she's the type or it's in her. And I literally took that as my motivation to say, what do you mean? I couldn't be a fighter pilot or a submarine warfare commander. Of course I could. Um, and I kind of found myself with the air force academy. It's in a roundabout way. Did you have, so you operate well with a chip on your shoulder, right? Like when somebody, when somebody said, well, is that, is that not right? Yeah. Yeah. If somebody says that you can't do something, I think it, it definitely makes me motivated to work harder. Okay. Okay. And then, so you're at, did you have good grades in high school?

I did. I did pretty well. So you knew So somehow your parents conveyed the importance of studying and going to class and doing all those important things to position yourself for success later. Were your parents and grandparents, would you call them successful? Yes, definitely. And I think that you asked me earlier, so I'm going to kind of digress into this, to that question about the work hard and how it's changed. I think that, you know, earlier in my career, my work hard, you know, was definitely more internally focused on just trying to be the best that I could be at whatever I was given, whatever job that was, or whether it was flying a plane, I wanted to fly it to the best of my ability and learn everything I could. Once I kind of, you know, got married, had a family, those kinds of things, you know, it definitely kind of shifts your work hard, my work hard philosophy. And you kind of have to

bring that, that family piece into balance. And I think it's great. You know, your, your kids automatically do that for you. I don't know if you have this too. I know you have a, you have a son, but no matter what happens during my day, you know, I might've in the past, let it, you know, get to me and have that inner, you know, that inner dialogue about all the regrets and the ruminating about what I could have done better that day. I think now having kids where you go home and they give you that unconditional, unconditional love and that hug and that I love you no matter what happened today at work, that feeling has kind of changed my attitude to the next morning. I don't get caught up in that inner dialogue. The next morning, I take two deep breaths

and I kind of set my intentions for what I'm going to do that day and how I'm just going to do better than I did the day before. Is that a regular practice that you have? Two breaths and an intention? That is. And I try to do it with my daughter. She's nine. And so she and I have been kind of trying to do that together, kind of talk about what are our intentions for today or what do we want to focus on? How did you describe, I've got an eight-year-old, and so how did you describe intention to your daughter? You know, when I first asked her, I said, what do you want out of today? And that kind of did turn into, you know, the typical nine-year-old answer, which is to eat cookies or play with my friends. So we started with that, which gave us the, the, the foundation, the starting point. And then I kind of said, okay, well, well, those are things

that you'll just do today. But what, what are your, you know, what do you want to get out of today? Like when you look back at the end of today, what do you want to feel like you've accomplished? Um, and so like the other day when Chris, my husband, came home, she said, I want to make sure, you know, daddy knows how much I love him and want to spend time with him today. And that was kind of, that was our intention for yesterday. And it was great. We both had that intention, right?

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Again, that's Felix Gray. You spell it F-E-L-I-X-G-R-A-Y.com and use the code FindingMastery20 at FelixGray.com for 20% off. So when we think about that change, that from like ambition and getting after it and trying to be the best that you can be with whatever task is at hand, was that more for an external reward or was it because you loved how it felt to get better? And the reason I'm asking that question that way is because then you had children and I'm wondering what the pivot was away from however you answer the first part of that question. So I think in our youth, you know, I've definitely grown up a lot, obviously in the

last 20 years, but you know, in our youth, we, we do focus on, um, what we think we should be doing. You know, if we, like, if I break it down to rules-based thinking, right. And values-based thinking, I think I've definitely shifted. That's probably the best way to describe it, is that before, I would kind of focus on what should I be doing, right, or what is expected of me at this moment in my career or in my life. And over time with having children, I think it's been more about shifting towards what do I value and what is important to me and where do I want to spend my time? And although I know that, you know, dedicating some time to a nonprofit or spending time on my education, you know, had to be a balance with all the other things I had going

on. I, I felt like it was my values driving me toward those, um, those endeavors. Does that make sense? Yeah, no, it definitely does. And okay. So rule-based and then value-based kicked out, kicked in as soon as you felt that kind of unconditional love or that need or desire to take care of the, um, your child. Right. Yeah. Okay. And then, um, I, I don't know what it's like to be a successful woman and then have children. So I have a sense of what, a little bit more sense of like what happens on a career path when I had a son. And I'll tell you what happened for me.

And then I'd love to hear what happened for you is that all of a sudden I didn't. My line of work is to listen and to ask questions and to help people reveal, based on good science and some art, the wisdoms and insights and strategies and ways of thinking that are optimal for them, and then to create great habits around it. So I lost my voice. I don't mean physically, but I completely didn't know what to say as soon as I had a son. So I'd love to know what that was like for you. I mean, did you put your head down and just keep grinding until, or until one day you're like, wait a minute, I've got a, I've got a children at home or was it like more immediate from the time of birth? I would, I would say that it was a, it was a process for me, but, and this actually is a good, this is a perfect segue. So, so good job. Um, this is how I found mindfulness and meditation is, you know, I had my daughter and

at the time I was actually transitioning from, we call it PCS, a permanent change of station in the military, where I was moving from a base in North Carolina, where I'd flown the C-130 out to California where I was going to fly a new plane, the KC-10 airborne air refueler. And so I had, I was very lucky in that I went from having a baby to some maternity leave and then to a training position where my main job was to learn how to fly this new plane. So there wasn't a lot of extra things on my plate at the time. So I actually got to kind of enjoy being a mom, enjoy also still doing what I love, getting to fly airplanes and getting to kind of master the new craft of flying the KC-10. However, shortly after that, when my daughter was about just about two years old, my husband, who's also active duty, deployed for a year to the Middle East. And at the same time, I was put in charge as the formal training unit chief for the whole KC-10 flying on the West Coast. And so it was a unit of about, at any given time, 75 people. And so I had that responsibility at work. I had a two-year-old, I had a house,

I had a dog, I had my husband. And, you know, my personality up till then was to work hard and to give, give, give, to make sure that the unit was running great. I was still keeping up my credibility as a, you know, a top pilot. And, you know, my daughter was taken care of, the house was taken care of, and the dog and everybody. And I kind of lost myself that year. And it was one of those things that led me to mindfulness and meditation in particular, and yoga, because I needed something for me. And it kind of took me getting to that burnout point to realize that I wasn't taking care of myself. And in order to take care of everyone else, that had to be a priority.

And that's kind of when that hit me. Okay, so you ran straight into a brick wall. And was it like you were just fatigued or sick and tired of feeling a certain way? Or was it like just the stress was overwhelming and you're performing poorly? What was the, because the idea that I'm working from is that the reason humans change is because of pain. And I could be way off on it, but it's been holding up for a long time, that thought. So I hope I'm not trying to back into my theory, but was there pain? Maybe is it more eloquent thing, a way to ask this question. Right. Well, there was definitely, there was definitely pain and there definitely was, you know, we talk about it now that inner dialogue and all those feelings and emotions that we let

our minds kind of run away with. And I would consistently convince myself that I still wasn't doing enough, you know, that I still wasn't being enough for my daughter, for my unit, or for my husband who was deployed. And so I think that's a lot of weight on your shoulders, you know, especially when you're still trying to perform at your best. Were you at that point a lieutenant colonel? No, I was a major at that point. Okay. How many female lieutenant colonels are there in your division? Or maybe, I don't know, more broadly?

So overall, yeah, in the Air Force, we're still probably very, I mean, it's like 15% or less of females. And then I would say in my, my particular career field of being a mobility air forces pilot, I think we're closer to about 10% that get to the point where they've commanded and continue to stay in, stay in the air force. Cause it definitely is a challenging career. And is there a reason for that? That's a great question. It's definitely very personal for each person that makes the decision and the choice to, to either separate from the military or, you know, and their career and retire, um, you know, before achieving maybe their full potential. And I think a lot of times family does come into play. Um, it is a hard, I won't say it's an easy life, because I do know that there's a lot of younger women that look up to me and say, Hey, you know,

you've been able to get as far as you have. But, you know, it hasn't been without hard work. And it hasn't been without having the right attitude about it. And just understanding your own limitations, and being able to let some things go. Like, that's definitely what I've learned later in my career. Yeah. Okay, letting some things go like, what does that mean? Like the perfection piece. Oh, are you, are you a perfectionist? Yes. I, I, I definitely have to have my moments and I think that, you know, you have to get to a place of acceptance, um, that what you've done that day. And I think this is where, you know, what I find from the meditation and mindfulness is a power in

the self-reflection and kind of revealing my inner self. Um, if that's the right way to phrase it. Um, and, and that self-reflection piece is where I can be accepting of what I'm able to give on any given day. And it's like yoga, right? It's a practice. You go to your yoga class and one day you're killing it, right? You're handstands, headstands, you name it, you're dominating. And then the next day you can't even hold your balance for three seconds. So it's a practice.

And so I think that's kind of how I look at, at, at life now in my job, um, especially as a commander each and every day, I, I make mistakes and we have a philosophy here. We call it, we fail forward in our unit. And as long as we're moving forward and not back, that it's okay to kind of pick ourselves up and say, Hey, we're going to do better next time. Have you ever tried to operationalize what failure is? Ooh, is it, is it a mistake? I'm guessing by the pause that maybe not. Is failure a mistake or I don't want to lead you in any direction, but how do you think about failure? So failure is kind of a, I think it's a very necessary thing. Um, you know, I actually, I actually read, and I think this was at your recommendation. I read that book, the art of

learning about how, you know, people who just, if you, if you, things come too easily for you, right, there's no challenge in it. Um, how are you bettering yourself or bettering your performance? And so I think that, that learning and being better, there's some necessity for failure and for, and I guess mistake is probably the good word. We talk a lot about, you know, as a commander, that there's mistakes and there's crimes, right? If you make mistakes, we fail forward and we fix it. Now, if you commit a crime, then that's a whole different situation. You'll find yourself in my office for something else. Oh, geez.

Look at that. Okay. Yeah. That's a really cool distinction. Okay. So, The Art of Learning, Josh Wakins, super ambitious early on, not overwhelmed by limits, kind of excited by what's possible. Dad and granddad and probably your mom and grandmother, although I didn't hear that as much, were positive influences in your life to go for it, right? And shape those messages early on for you. Interesting,

though, that it was kind of grandpa and dad that were the two that you referenced most. And so I want to hear about the women in your life as well. And then, so how do people, how do people, like, how do your, I don't know, your closest friends or the people that you're commanding, how do they describe you? How does Chris describe you? Maybe it's like, are you more ambitious or perfectionist or more loving and more aggressive or assertive or like, what is it? You know, I think that there's, I think Chris, and I'll just kind of take recently, he got, he got promoted and he did kind of say a couple words. And I think he, he just summed it up in that, um, you know, I always challenge him to, to

be a, you know, a better person to be thinking about being a better leader or better at, you know, his craft, right? He's a, he's a maintenance officer. So he's, he leads a huge maintenance teams in the air force, but even if he's, you know, on staff in charge of a program or just being a dad or any of his extracurricular activities, I think he would say that I challenge him to not be satisfied with, you know, the status quo. And I think that's probably what I try to instill in everybody in my unit as well, is that, you know, the status quo. And I think that's probably what I try to instill in everybody in my unit as well, is that, you know, not to be accepting of just where you're at. You know,

I ask, in fact, all of them should know what their two next steps are. And I ask them to be able to articulate that to me, both personally and professionally, right? What are they working toward? What are you, what do you get up in the morning and say, Hey, I want to, I want to work on this or I want to be better at that. Um, so that they, what is it for you? Yeah. Sorry to interrupt. What is it for you? Well, for me, I would say it's, you know, right now I've kind of got a challenging life situation kind of doing what I do as a single parent, um, since my husband is actually stationed across the country right now. So I, I know I personally need to get kind of a handle on the balance in my life. That's where, that's where, that's where I need to get right now. Me too. Yeah. Okay. So, all right. So again,

this is, this is why I was like, really wanted to talk to you because when we met, like you're in a committed relationship, a loving relationship, and then you guys have separate deployment movements often. And so like what you've accomplished at the level you've accomplished, the intensity that your job requires and also finding the right rhythms for kicking ass and loving that. I think that that's a really tough

thing to do. And so I don't think I'm asking like the right questions really to get at what I'm trying to understand for you. It's like, how do you do that? Maybe that, maybe it's just more simple. Yeah. How do I do that? So, you know what, that's actually the perfect question because this is, this is the way that I think of it. You know, there are two probably key factors in high performance for me. And this is, this goes back to kind of how I've lived my life, at least as of late. And then also through my dissertation studies and those two factors. So the first one is teamwork. So I don't, I really don't do anything alone. You know, I, I try to partner with, um, people who inspire me, people who will challenge

me. My husband does that on a daily basis as well. Like I know he says I do that for him and, and he does that for me. Um, you, my family has always kind of challenged me and I have, this is where, you know, my mom has sacrificed a lot throughout her whole adult life for, you know, her children. And even now she will at a moment's notice, come out and help me if I need, you know, childcare, if I need a shoulder to cry on, um, she, she will be there to support me and, um, my, my family. So I don't do anything without teams. That's the same thing at work. Like I have an amazing team here in the 305th Operation Support Squadron, and I could not do half the things, you know, that I do. And really, let's be real. I don't do a lot of the work, right? They do all the work. They're the

ones that are making the squadron a success. I just hope that in some small way, I'm inspiring them, you know, giving them purpose and, and, um, giving them, you know, a reason to kind of work hard and, and motivation. So anyway, teamwork is, is one of the factors, but the other one, and I know this is going to sound super touchy feely for, from a military person, but the other one is self-love. It really, and you know, it's so contrary because we are taught in the military to be servant leaders and service before self and it's that give give give thing that even I kind of succumb to at one point in my career but there is a place for self-love in that servant leadership and that service before self and a very necessary place for it and it's it's like the airline auction

mask analogy right secure your Secure your oxygen mask before helping others. If you don't take care of yourself first and show yourself some of that love, you can't serve or lead your organization very effectively. So intellectually, totally understand it, right?

And then I guess the question is, yeah, I was surprised that you said that. But I'm not disagreeing at all with it. So interesting that you put them in that order, teamwork first and then self-love second. But so if we started with the self-love concept, how do you do it? What is your way of doing it for you? So self-love, I kind of identify in a couple different ways. So the mindfulness, the meditation, the having time for myself to help me focus, to help me hone my attention because I realize how important that is to my daily activity. I want to be present with my teams.

I want to be present with my children. I need to be present with my husband. I need to be present in an aircraft, right? Like I need to be there, um, in the moment and with my quiet mind, calm mind. So that mindfulness and, and what I also find is my self-reflection piece, um, is kind of where I, that's foundational. That's kind of foundational to the rest. Okay. So are you doing more single point mindfulness work or more contemplative work where you're non-judgmentally observing your thoughts or how are you structuring your mindfulness practice? I, so I do a lot of, I kind of do a little bit of both.

I do, um, you know, my own practice where I just kind of sit in the present moment, that non-judgmental piece. But I also find that after doing that, I also take some moments for that, you know, the ability to kind of let my inner wisdom kind of be revealed, where I kind of hone my values, figure out what my definition of success is, and then kind of make sure I'm setting like goals along that, that route. Um, so I kind of do a little bit of both. So you'll sit and just observe and you're, you're, you're watching, you're contemplating or watching your thoughts. Is that right? Like for the first half and then you're, and then the second or maybe the, just to kind of the, the butt end of it, the tail end of it is just kind of stitching together some focus and defining

some terms for yourself. Maybe it's success or whatever it is. And you're like just doing some work there. And is that like just a couple minutes? Or is that half of the time that you're spending? I would say I would say the it's about just a couple minutes at the end. But it's more like, you know, when you're in those first few minutes of just bringing yourself to the present, part of that exercise is to get some of the noise out, right? It's, it's clearing our minds, focusing in the present. I use my breath as a very powerful tool for that. And, you know, you acknowledge that those other thoughts are there because my mind runs a million miles a minute like most of ours do. And you acknowledge them and then you kind of just let them float away. And then at the end, I can really contemplate on those important nuggets that I want to bring back into focus.

Does that make sense? Yeah, for sure. And then the first part, the settling in or quieting your mind, is that do you put a timer on it or are you looking for a particular clarity so that you can do the thinking work? You know, first I'm going to admit that I do not do this perfectly every single day, right? It's a practice, just like my yoga. So some days are better than others. Some days it's longer than others. In fact, I've tried to – you know, I've struggled because I'm a to-do list person, right?

I don't know if you're a to-do list person. Not so good. Yeah. So I have insane to-do lists, right? They're all over the place and drive me nuts sometimes. In fact, after I had my first child, I would be so annoyed because at the end of the day, I said I would get nothing off my to-do list. And so my husband would start writing on the list, like, feed baby, change baby, bathe baby, just so I could get nothing off my to-do list. And so my husband would start writing on the list like feed baby, change baby, bathe baby just so I could cross things off. So that can be pretty controlling for me, these lists.

And I blame my childhood friend Amari for that because we used to write lists about how we were going to play. But I digress. So I don't want mindfulness to be on my to-do list, right? Because then it becomes something that I will feel bad if I don't accomplish it or I don't cross it off or I will feel some guilt. So I've decided that it's not my to-do. It's just something I do. Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay.

And then is it, I don't know, once a week for 10 minutes? Is it five times a week? 20 minutes? My goal is once a week for about 10 to 15, or it's not once a week, once a day for about 10 to 15 minutes. But if I don't do it, I let it go. I just say, I'll try again tomorrow. It just didn't happen today. Finding Mastery is brought to you by Cozy Earth. Over the years, I've learned that recovery doesn't just happen when we sleep. It starts with how we transition and wind down.

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And when your day demands clarity and energy and presence, the way you prepare for it matters. If you're looking for high quality personal care products that elevate your routine without complicating it, I'd love for you to check them out. Head to calderalab.com slash findingmastery and use the code findingmastery at checkout for 20% off your first order. That's calderalab, C-A-L-D-E-R-L-A-B.com slash Finding Mastery. You know, I was talking to someone the other day, and they're exceptional at what they do. And we're talking about mindfulness. And the response was, yeah, you know, it's actually inside of everything I do.

So I used to practice and train a lot, and now it's just part of everything I do. Yeah, so she was like, I don't know, in some kind of way stitching together that she's really present throughout the day and she's not spending 20 minutes or an hour sitting. And she said, but I had to do that for a long time to be able to seamlessly be mindful in my daily activities. So I just, I don't know. I think that there's something important to pay attention to that as well. No, I totally agree. I agree. And in fact, I think where I might notice that the most is like when I'm dealing with my children and how there are moments where I can just take one deep breath and kind of snap myself out of

whatever thoughts were just going to get me carried away in that moment. And I be more present. Yeah. Okay. So you mentioned something earlier about like with your mom that if I needed a shoulder to cry on, when was the last time that you just let go and cried? And because I got this image of you being, you know, absolutely kick ass and then in all facets of your life. And then you add that layer of being in the military and the stoic heartedness, you know, just that kind of, not rigid, but military presentation of emotion tends to be rather muted. And then you said, you know, you brought up the phrase about someone's shoulder to cry on. When was the last time you just were able to let go? You felt something, either joy or sadness or whatever it was, that you were able to be fully expressive?

You know, you're going to make me vulnerable here. I'm not supposed to be vulnerable. Open. How about instead of vulnerability, just open? Open. Open. Yeah. No, I think that it's human to have those moments.

And I think that anyone that's in the military that would say that they can be completely stoic and unemotional is probably not being 100% honest because a lot of what we do is very emotional and we get very connected to it. So I'm just going to tell a quick story and then I'll come back to the last time I kind of had a breakdown. Oh, no, I didn't say breakdown. I said joyful cry. I said just feel completely that you were able to let go completely. Okay. Okay, that's different because, yeah, the breakdown,

I kind of talked about that. But one thing, so one time that I found myself, and I'll tell the story about being in the war zone is, you know, when I used to fly C-130s in and out of Iraq, and we do, we would do that 56 and two, 56 troops and two pallets in and out, sometimes multiple times in one day. And, you know, through that experience, it was, it's one of those things where you, you hone your skill, right? I was trained as a C-130 pilot. I was kind of excited to go over there and actually get to do what I was trained to do in the service of my nation. It wasn't just training and flying around the base, but I was

actually going to get to go overseas and do a mission. And there was something exciting and inspirational about that. So you're excited. I can see you walking around the tarmac or whatever you might call it. And the planes are buzzing and there's that vibe in the air that you're about to go strike or go run a mission. And is that, that's exciting for you? It's not overwhelming. It's not nerve wracking. It's exciting. I think it's exciting. And at the time it was very exciting because you kind of, you know, some people look at, like, for example, we take physical fitness tests here in the military, right? We take them once a year or every six months, depending on how well you do. And a lot of people freak out about them, right?

Whereas my attitude, and I think a lot of other people's attitude is like, hey, this is my time to perform, right? Demonstrate how well I can do. It's the same kind of thing when you go over there, you're, you're done training and you actually get to just go do. And, um, I think that's the, that's kind of what a lot of the, the attitude and the feeling is. Um, when you get to go do those things, that's why most airmen in the fly planes or that are air crew, um, or go over there, like they join to do that, right? To travel and to adventure and to do something that is extremely meaningful. And so that is exciting. Yes, that is very exciting.

And I think when I went over there, I also was very much about the experience and really coming away with understanding what we were doing over there, what it was like to be on the ground in Iraq, because I would fly in and we'd be on the ground for, you know, a short period of time, and then we'd fly back out and we'd drop army troops, troops off or Marines. And I chose in that moment of that experience to, we'd always bring one of the soldiers or airmen or sailors up to the front and we'd let them sit up in the, in the cockpit with us. We'd have conversations, put them on headset. And I really just wanted to know what it was like for them. And I, I still remember, you know, I would

take pictures of them up there and this is before, you know, email was really big and you could Skype everywhere in the, in the combat zone. And so I would, when I got back to my home base, I would always email their picture either to their mom or their spouse or whoever. And, you know, I saved all those emails. And sometimes I do read back through my journals and through some of those interactions. And a lot of other people would say, oh, don't do that when you're over there, right? Like just, it's about your job and just do your job. And I think that there's a very human aspect to that experience. And I really wanted to kind of tap into that and capture that. And, you know, I did have a lot of emotional moments of, of over there and I had a great

crew that I was with. In fact, I had a female load master with me. Um, and she was, you know, her name was Jamie and she was awesome. And we were in that together and we learned a lot about ourselves and about compassion, right? It was kind of probably foundational to that of kind of what we were learning and experiencing. Okay. I'm wondering if you're avoiding the question too. See, I did talk about emotions and war. That's what I wanted to hear about. Yeah, so in context, I have such high regard for people that serve in military, every branch,

and then fascinated with people in the special operators and how they've been able to train and create something that is really rare and special. And there's a lot of emotion in that. Oh, yeah. And if you get overrun by emotions, it's a problem because it doesn't allow us to think clearly. And so being in touch with emotions and exercising them and figuring them out and going deeply inside of them is just part of the training so that you're not run over by them as soon as you're in the amphitheater. And so I don't know. I'm just wondering, like, because I don't think you're flying missions now, but, you know, just trying to get a sense of can you do emotions in the military as a female

is maybe another way of asking that question. That's actually a very interesting question. You know what? Before you keep going, before you go, I don't think like in the corporate world, there's unfair standards. And I've been doing just a wonderful amount of work inside of some corporations recently. And it's like this double standard that if you want to kick ass as a woman, that there's this double standard that you can't show emotions as much as a man can. And it's still not really permitted to do emotions as a man. And so it's really this archaic system. The only emotion men get to demonstrate is like anger and frustration, you know, and a little bit of happiness. It's like you can't do scared and you can't do sad. And then women in the corporate world are even more muted because it's like some kind of, I don't know, weird little thing that, see, she can't think clearly. She's too erratic or too emotional.

Well, it's the same for a man. Erratic is erratic, independent of gender. So I don't know. I'm just trying to get a sense of what that's like from your point of view. Well, I would like to think that the military has come far with that. But unfortunately, I think we're still very similar to what you just described, that it's more of that heated, you know, argumentative or that kind of like exploding type frustration that most people would feel like. I think that's pretty, pretty reasons why I'm trying to kind of instill mindfulness into it so that we can get out of that emotional decision-making center and get to more rational thought by quieting our minds. Yeah, for sure. Let's say that you've got 5, 10, 15, 20 years left in service. It doesn't really matter. What do you want your legacy or how do you want to be remembered about what you've added to the forces which you've dedicated your whole life efforts towards? So in the context of right here, right now, and my command, because this is, you know,

we normally do these commands for about two years. And I said this in my change of command speech, you know, a year and a half ago, and I'll probably say the same thing when I leave, I honestly don't really care about what people think about Janelle McCauley. What I want is that everybody who was part of this unit during the, you know, the two years that I served here, I just want them all to feel like they're better people for having been a part of this organization. That's, that's really what I kind of try to focus on. I love it. And do you give them time or space or instruction or encouragement to do mindfulness at work? actually, I do. In fact, we probably are the only unit in the entire Air Force right now that kind of that does meditate together. But, you know, I've started slow. And you might actually get a kick out of this. We started with this concept of call, you know, when I first took command,

because I didn't want to just jump in and say, hey, we're all going to start meditating together. So my very first command call, I did teach them all about how to kind of recognize their stress response. And when they recognized that, I taught them a catchphrase, and it was go to the cloud. And what I meant by that is to take a step back, to take some deep breaths, focus on their breath, and try to kind of trigger the thoughts from that emotional place that's getting hung up in that amygdala, right? And to then kind of step back and make sure that the next step, whatever they were going to do, whether it was shooting off an email, saying something, you know, that they thought about it first and they tried to get to that rational place.

And it's kind of become somewhat of a catchphrase around our unit. And I think go into the cloud. Is that what you said? Yeah. And so as a pilot, what does that mean? Well, in pilot terms, it would mean if you're in those moments where you're getting overwhelmed, right? Which that perceived distress that we feel when we have 10 different things going on in the cockpit and we can't focus our attention to do what we need to do, which is most of the time, you know, aviate and fly our aircraft. It's going to the cloud and taking those deep breaths to kind

of center ourselves in the present. Because when you're in the present, and I'm sure this is probably something that you would even be able to expound upon, but when you're in the present, and I'm sure this is probably something that you would even be able to expound upon, but when you're in that present moment, all that training, all that education and experience, it will come to you. It will be there at your subconscious level. It's the chatter in your mind sometimes in those high-stress situations that actually you think that's what you need to be doing, is thinking back to all my training, thinking back to all the things that I know. And it's actually the opposite. It can be counterproductive in those, in those high stress moments. Exactly on it. Okay, cool. Um, is there a phrase that guides your life? Yes. And I'm going to, I'm going to throw some props back to my dad again here. So here's another quote that he taught me when I was really young. Vision is the art of seeing the invisible. And Jonathan, Jonathan Swift. Yeah. And I really,

I just really kind of feel that quote, right? I think that it's, it's what I'm doing right now in the Air Force as a leader and kind of exposing my team to mindfulness and to self-love. It's something that I hope to do and expand upon across the Air Force because I really believe in it and I think it's so important. But it's my vision and I see it, but it's a difficult one for other people to understand your model of success? And I want to ask you what success is in a minute, but can you remember a time, a specific time when you were the most alive or the most you?

Wow. That's a good question. You know, I think it's, it's, it changes and I have, um, different moments because I think there's, you know, the personal moments when I feel the most, you know, me and I, and I, I just had one of those moments the other, just two days ago when my husband surprised us and we actually took kind of like a candid, you know, little selfie as a family. And it was just all four of us kind of snuggled up to bed together in the morning. And, um, those moments, those precious moments with my family, I do feel most me because it's like that unconditional love that you feel right there, no matter how you might've performed the day before what's going on elsewhere in your life. Um, but also I, I really, I kind of,

um, I get really, um, I don't know what the right word is to, to kind of phrase it, but my airmen are very inspirational and they kind of fill up my tank is what I, what I call it on some of those days when work is hard. And I go out and I talk with some of my airmen who are young and so professional. I mean, you would be amazed at how young we control the airspace right in between JFK, DC and Philadelphia. And there are these young 20 year olds controlling your American Airlines jet as it's flying around. I mean, it is pretty amazing what these airmen can do. And they inspire me every day with their attitude and their dedication to the mission and just their passion for their jobs and for each other.

Cool. All right. So I guess that kind of brings me to, I'd love to ask you about risk-taking and then I've got some quick I'd love to ask you about risk-taking. And then I've got some quick hits for you. Are you a risk-taker? Yes. You are. And maybe you can describe maybe one of the greatest risks you've taken, like what that would be. So, you know, I wouldn't say that, you know, I'm always a risk taker.

I probably through my military training, like we always kind of do the calculated risk, the risk benefit kind of analysis is kind of what I've grown up with and been trained to. But I think that as much as I'm allowed to as a military commander right now, I think that, you know, I do like or appreciate taking risks. Again, knowing full well that we may fail or we may not get exactly where we want to go, right? Like there's no one direct way to getting to the solution or getting to that yes. And I'm okay with that as long as we're learning. That's probably the key word in that. I like risk as long as we continue it as a learning process. And then do you have any insights on how to become a better risk taker? Insights for becoming a better risk taker? I think trust is a big part of it.

Yeah, I do too. And I think it's trusting not others, but trusting your ability to adjust to whatever comes on the other side of the going for it. Does that, do you, or were you going another way that it's trusting other people? No, I think it's both. In the military, what we focus on is the teamwork and being able to trust the guy or girl next to you to do what they're trained to do to, in some ways, potentially save your life. And so I think there is some of that. have that inner trust to believe in themselves that either they can take a risk and be successful or that it's okay to fail because I think so many people are afraid of that failure and so they don't even bother to step outside I mean that comes up over and over and over again right it's like fear of failure fear of not being good enough and that keeps us small and stuck

and then when you feel that how do, what do you do to organize? Do you go – I got two questions, I guess. Let's start with a small question. Like what do you do when you're feeling that overwhelming pressure? Gosh, and I do feel it all the time. I'm not going to pretend that I don't because it's definitely very prevalent in my life. I, I, I, anytime I feel that overwhelming pressure, I do start with those couple deep breaths. Honestly, I I'm big on centering myself. Um, and then I just try to kind of logically think through whatever

it is I'm about to, you know, encounter. And, you know, sometimes I don't make the right choice. Right. Um, especially so as a commander, we make a lot of decisions on a daily basis that affect other people's lives. How many, how many on average do you make? Um, I would say, you know, there are probably, you know, 50 decisions that we make in a day on lots of different things from the mission related to the people. And it's not like when you work a different job, if you got a DUI or you somehow were arrested or got in trouble for something, your boss doesn't really care. In the military, I actually have what's called Uniform Code of Military Justice, UCMJ authority. So I have to care. It's part of good order and discipline. It's part of being that teammate that can be trusted. And so I am kind of judge and jury

a lot of times for different offenses. We talked back about the mistakes versus the crime. And so those decisions are big. So when somebody makes a bad decision off campus, so to speak, off base, and it was a decision that was, I don't know, bad judgment and there was a crime that was committed or something that wasn't legal. do you go about judging or determining if that is going to impact the safety and progression of your unit or your squadron versus, okay, that's just, that's just noise. He's really, or she's really okay. So it's a lot of this is judgment call. It is. Um, you, you, yeah, it really is. I mean, any good commander will take all the facts from the case and will contemplate, you know, not make a rash decision. And that's also where I think that my, my skill set with mindfulness and kind of being able to, to step back and kind of look at the bigger picture and then make a decision based on, you know, my best judgment. Okay, so But it's not easy. It's definitely not easy. and then make a decision based on my best judgment. But it's not easy. It's definitely not easy. Are you more biased to give people a chance or to toe the line? Like if you make a mistake, I'm betting that you're going to make another mistake.

So you're out, so to speak. Right. A lot of times it depends on the mistake. I definitely am someone who believes in second chances. And sometimes, you know, it's that the blame game and I can almost in every situation, I try to turn the finger on myself and say, well, what could I have done better to set this airman up for success? You know, was there something that I or my leadership team could have done differently? And if there's a big yes on that, then obviously the consequence will be way different than if it was, you know, a conscious poor choice made by someone. And some things in the military are more black and white than others. So. Okay. So if you were to, if we were to get some quick hits, just like kind of numbers and expand on anything you want, but just get some numbers. So I could kind of understand a little bit deeper about how you kind of prepare yourself. And, and really it's, this is more about readiness and preparation than anything else. But so on a scale of one to 10, 10 being high, what is your ability to switch

on? And when I say switch on, I mean like access your ideal mindset for whatever the task is. Right now, I would say it's, it's probably hovers around like the five or six. So not, is that not great? Not, not where I want to be, but just because I think, um, you know, right now my personal situation is overwhelming and it's very hard for me. You know, I, I kind of say that, you know, most people will say, gosh, I don't know how you run a squadron and you're doing it as a single parent. And, you know, a couple of the other things, you know, juggling balls that I have in my life as well. Um, I think that because of the teamwork and the self-love that I practice, I think I am stable, right. And I, and I am present and aware enough to function pretty well. Um, but it's definitely not for me, my optimal, you know, if I had my

husband here, if I, uh, you you know could balance that a little bit better so how are you managing that I have it takes a village so I've got great team I'm gonna go back to it like great teams and honestly self-love and when I and when I talk about self-love I did I think I the mindfulness, but it also includes nutrition. You know, 80% of how you feel on a day-to-day basis is what you put in your mouth. And I'm really conscious of that. Sleep is very big. And there are days I'm horrible at it. So I will not say that right now I'm the best sleeper, but, you know, it is very important.

In fact, from a warfighting context, like, you basically give the enemy a leg up when you, you know, rob yourself of the necessary sleep you need. Right. So you're, you're already, you're already giving them a win in the column, but, um, you know, I love that. I'm going to, that really resonates with me for sport and obviously military from your lenses, but sport and performance in every aspect of life. Exactly. Exactly. Like, yeah. Exercise is really big. And then, you know, I kind of call it the lost art of human connection. I think that technology has kind of robbed us of the ability to physically connect with one another. And that is where my airmen like walking around and talking to them. That is my oxytocin, right? My, my feel good for the day. The cuddle chemical. It is. It really is. Like, and you know, I, I call their parents like that is like my favorite

thing to do. And those are the moments that fill up my tank. like i don't i have no interest in how old you are but at the same time are they much younger than you like 20 years younger than you yes yeah okay i'm about 20 years younger yeah yeah so it's like in some ways um that you could be their mom if you started really young right yeah so it's like that's got to be a really different role for you as well because coming coming up, you were, you know, you were the same age as many of your peers, obviously. Yeah. And going back to your question about women in the military, you know, I can't speak for all my male colleagues, but I definitely feel a sense of, you know, the 400 people who are in this

squadron, you know, I feel like they're my family. And I genuinely care about them as if, you know, the 400 people who are in this squadron, you know, I feel like they're my family. And I genuinely care about them as if, you know, I revel in their successes and their triumphs and their awards and the great things that they do. And I also am there to kind of be there when they're sad. And, you know, we have family situations that go on. And so it's like having 400 extra children. Oh my God. And do you think that that is, because you set it up like it's a gender thing. Do you think that that is, um, dispositional to you or more of a gender bias, not bias isn't the right word or orientation that motherly um command might be differently than a paternal or a fatherly command you know i don't i it may just be more i think what i would

attribute it to is that idea of compassion and i think someone that's even a man can you know if they practice it right it's really funny even a man can, you know, they practice it, right? That's really funny. Even a man could have compassion. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, no, I agree. That's why I was wondering if it was like your orientation, because you value compassion and orientating towards taking care of others in a family style, as opposed to do your job. If you don't do your job, you got to go. And you could still have compassion, but it's just like way more rigid and object or outcome based. And so I, maybe it's not even fair to say, is this gender biased or I'm sorry, gender orientation or more unique to you? And I don't know if you've got a take on it. Yeah. Honestly, I think that there, you know,

many of my colleagues and other men that do what I do, there probably are some out there that feel the same way I do. the compassion at that level, it's very possible that it's not just a female-male thing, but more of... Yeah, I think you're flat out right. I'll reference a conversation I had with Coach Carroll on Finding Mastery, and he's the head coach for the Seattle Seahawks. And we talked about what does it all come down to? And I don't know if you could guess his response, but it's pretty simple, love. And I didn't know he was going to his response but it's pretty simple love yeah and like I didn't know he was going to answer it that way and that's exactly the same way that I answer it as well you know self-love love of nature love of others love of this challenge love of the process of trying to figure love you know and everything from a romantic love to companion love to self-love it it's the essence of, I think, what we're trying to figure out.

And so, you know what's interesting? So I did a survey. I think you'll find this interesting, maybe. I did a survey of folks that listened to these conversations. What's up, everyone? And you know what came, was the last on the list of like what they're most interested in? It was like performance under pressure and the kind of hard edge stuff. And the lowest was love. People are not interested

in loving. I think it's the base and the foundation. So that's why I get excited to come back to well, my N10s definitely were really high when you talked about self-love. Okay, let's keep going here. Your ability to switch on, you said five or six. Your ability to switch off. My ability to switch off. So I definitely in my later, you know, my more recent years, I'll say not later years, my more recent years have gotten better at being able to understand the importance of the recovery, right? For the

performance piece. So I need to have those recovery moments. I need to take those moments for myself. Um, I am not perfect at it all the time because especially right now, the job I have is very demanding, you know, running the unit that I do, there's hardly those quiet times, but I do understand their value. And I do try to take those moments, especially the ones with my kids, right? Like the one thing I do not compromise of or compromise on unless I'm actually physically in an airplane, you know, flying in the evening is my bedtime ritual with my kids. That is something that I really covet and I love those moments, right? I just, that's part of switching off. Yeah, that's where I have that. So your ability to manage your internal distractions, one to 10.

Oh, probably about a seven. That one I'm still trying to master. Tell me how to master that. That's one that I... Well, it obviously begins with awareness and then how quickly you can guide back to now. And so we all have distractions and we call it train of thought for a reason. It's just kind of once that thing gets going, it gets going. I think that it just all begins with awareness. I don't know. I don't think that that's new information. So sorry.

It's just like our minds just want to be mentally hijacked all the time. It definitely is a skill and a practice to get out of your head. Okay. Ability to lock in and focus. One to ten. I would say nine. When it's dangerous. Eight or nine.

When it's boring. Or five or six. When you feel pressure? Eight or nine. And during emotional risk? Oh, probably seven. That's a tougher one, I think. Oh, my God. You know, we talk about risk-taking. It's not. And we talk about, you know, getting uncomfortable wonderful exchanges of um at the neurochemical level

but uh and at the physiological level but emotional risk it's so freaking hard it really is hard okay so one to ten uh are you can i say something can i say something about that real quick yeah i think that that's one of the the thing the the biggest issues in the military right when you when you talk about mastery of the craft within the military, I think that we always focus on that physical prowess, right? Or the expert training and a specific skillset, you know, are we a pilot or an air traffic controller or special forces? And, um, I think we do a pretty good job in the military of focusing on that physical aspect, but that emotional piece, I think we see is, or a lot of people in the military see as that vulnerable side. And it's still new, you know, it's still new. And I think that they're not, the science is definitely pointing, as you just kind of described it, how important it is to kind of be able to regulate that. good research around the insula or insular cortex and how mindfulness or focus training as well can

increase the capacity for the insular cortex to operate well. And the insular cortex is one of the centers of the brain that sends information and also is involved in proprioception. And so when we're over emotional and meaning that we don't have the capacity to deal with the emotions that are at hand, then that whole system breaks down. Right. And so being able to feed, sorry, respond to the information that's coming in and also deal with the internal emotion, information that's happening. So there's lots of reasons to pay attention to it yeah and it's so important not just for you know our performance in our primary jobs but as a way to provide that resiliency right and protection against the mental strain especially military members that we

experience in those high stress environments yeah okay so are you more motivated by external rewards or internal rewards one to ten for external external. External, I would say, I'd say like five. And internal rewards? Internal, I would say that's a much higher, like eight or nine. I like to, oh, go ahead. Oh, what, what kind of the contributions that I'm making or the impacts, um, matter, not like, you know, just to see on a, on a, on a scale, um, you know, as leaders, we talk about influence more than like power.

It's not really about power. It's more just about influence. And I, you know, those are the things that kind of like make my, my heart kind of grow is seeing my folks, you know, learn from the things that I've exposed them to, or have positive experiences with it, whether it's a story they have about how they used mindfulness and a heated moment in an aircraft or in an argument they were about to have with a higher headquarters level over a weather forecast or whatever it is. Like those are the types of things that I just, that kind of motivate me. Okay. Yeah. So it's seeing others do well. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I kind of see that more as that internal kind of, um, motivator instead of the, something external to me, I guess. Yeah. Okay'm, you know, I'm being honest. I would not say that I jump into anything with, you know more toward a, probably a seven as far as,

um, you know, being over the fear of failure. Is that what I'm rating? Yeah, I know your fear of failure. So seven would be relatively high. Okay. So actually we'll go the other way. So probably closer to like a three or four. Okay. And, um, is it looking bad or consequences or coming up short? I think it goes back to the perfectionist inside me that has not completely gone away. That I'm not going to perform at my best or I'm not going to – I'm going to somehow let – I think I'm more of a fear of letting someone else down. Okay. Okay, there you go. And then your fear of letting someone else down. Okay. Okay. There you go.

And then your fear of success. One to ten. Ten would be like, I'm so afraid of success. I don't think I'm afraid of success. You know, I think as long as it's benefiting, you know, if my success is driving other people's success or in some way bettering this organization, our Air Force, our nation, I don't have a fear of that. In fact, I kind of embrace the fact that I'm definitely trying to push or introduce something that's new and different. And a lot of people come up to me and say, Oh, that's really brave or really risky of you to be talking about the stuff you talk about within our environment. And I don't really see it that way. You know, I, cause I see the vision, right. Of the betterment on the other side. And that's what I'm definitely not afraid of. So if, is there a

practice or some sort of thing that you do on a regular or semi-regular basis that you would hope that people could maybe adopt or play with or begin doing tomorrow or today? What would that thing be that would help them become better, be betterment, be the betterment that you're just describing? So I would start with, you know, I really like taking those couple deep breaths. You know, our breath is always with us, right? And it's free. And learning how to use that in times of stress is very powerful. So I'm going to kind of give you two, because that's one, is the power of our breath. But the second piece is kind of a gratitude. And that kind of goes with the setting of intentions. Like, what am I going to focus on or be thankful for today? And I actually learned this from one of the parents I called and I love it.

So I'm going to share it with you because I've started this with my kids too. When you start off every day, you also, you know, at the end of the day, or actually this is more of like at the end of the day, you want to look back and you want to, you want to have done four things, right? You wanted to have labored to laugh, to love and to learn each and every day. And sometimes, especially in the military and especially as leaders, we only labor, right? We get to the end of our day and you look back and you say, well, I worked hard and that's all you did. You know, did you, did you learn something? Did you love someone? Did you laugh? You know, those are just as important to, for my definition of success at

the end of the day. I would kind of. What a great, yeah. what okay what a great reflection practice as well okay so um yeah that brings us like to kind of the last couple things is how do you define or articulate mastery like what what have you come to understand lieutenant colonel macaulay well um I think that you know when I started off in the military, my job was to master being a pilot. However, you know, the military profession is more than just what our core Air Force Specialty Code defines us as. And for example, that's, I'm what they would call an 11 Mike, which is a mobility pilot. So that is my core job and my core duty. But, you know, as you go through the ranks that you also develop right now, I'm a commander and a leader and a decision maker.

In fact, everyone in the military is a leader at some level or developing into one. And that the same mental skills and self-reflection piece that make us really great at our primary duty. So that make, that made me great as an aviator will also make us great leaders too. And so the real skill is that ability to, um, you know, be in the present moment and clearing our minds. We have the ability to access our training at the subconscious level, no more thinking, just doing. And I think that translates whether it's mastery of our primary job or mastery of ourselves as leaders I think it's kind of the same well I agree that's awesome so I want to thank you for the time and what you've done is phenomenal and how you're doing it and the conditions that you're in right now and the struggle and the openness of trying to figure out something.

I think so many people that are listening to this conversation now are nodding their head to like, yeah, that sounds like me. I'm doing a lot and it's hard. that you so value the relationship you're in, the teamwork as you described it, and the importance of love, self-love first. Just beautiful and insightful and very applied practices that you've offered us to be able to train our minds through some sort of mindfulness training, or at least starting with two breaths and an intention for the day. So Lieutenant Colonel, I want to seriously thank you for your time. And I'm honored to know you and have this conversation. And I just want to say thank you. Well, thank you, Mike, for having me. I really appreciate the spotlight you're putting, you know, on this whole effort,

right, of us all getting to be the best that we can be, because I think that's so important. We should always be kind of striving for that, right? Constant improvement. And I appreciate your efforts. Yeah, cool. Very cool. In doing that. Yeah, and I know that your community out there is a bunch of great people that are also trying

to kind of share and spread the word. So I think it's awesome. Would you be open to answering some questions like at a later time on the Finding Mastery community? I'm sure you're going to get loads of questions here. Of course. I would love it. I would love it. Yeah. Brilliant. Okay. So with that in mind, is there a way that people can find you? I know you've got a nonprofit. Is there something that we can do if we're so inspired? Maybe you can give us how to reach you. Yeah. So, gosh, through Healthy Body, Healthy Life is kind of where a lot of our stuff, our community, which is kind of a military family charity that people can reach me through. There's also – and the Healthy Body, Healthy Life has a Facebook page that I can be reached through as well as LinkedIn.

I'm connected on there. And that's probably the best way right now to get ahold of me. Okay. So LinkedIn is your first name, Janelle, J-A-N-E-L-L. J-A-N-N-E-L-L. Yeah. And then M-A-C-A-U-L-A-Y. Yep. Okay. And then healthybodyhealthylife.org. Uh, they can find you there as well. Okay. Brilliant. So everyone listening, thank you so much. If you were inspired or enjoyed this, go check out Lieutenant Colonel McCauley on either LinkedIn or her nonprofit at Healthy Body, Healthy Living. And then you can also check us out at findingmastery.net for other conversations. You can find me at Michael Gervais, both on Twitter and Facebook. And then punch over to our community. And then, you know, I don't know if I told you this, Janelle, but we have minutes on mastery that we fired up as well, which is three-minute pearls of wisdom from these conversations. So you will be on there with a bunch of three-minute or less pearls of wisdom. And there's just, there's hosts of them from all the conversations. So you will be on there with a bunch of three minutes or less pearls of wisdom.

And there's just, there's hosts of them that from all the conversation. Yeah. So it's really good. So that's on iTunes as well. Okay. I'll have to check that out. Yeah. I have subscribed to your podcast.

Yeah. Here we go. I am a fan. Yeah. Here we go. Cool. So much. Okay.

So thanks again and look forward to the next time we have a chance to connect. Of course. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. Okay. Take care. Bye. Bye. All right. Thank you so much for diving into another episode of Finding Mastery with us. Our team loves creating this podcast and sharing these conversations with you. We really appreciate you being part of this community. And if you're enjoying the show, the easiest no-cost way to support is to hit the subscribe or follow button wherever you're listening. Also, if you haven't already, please consider dropping us a review on Apple or Spotify. We are incredibly grateful for the support and feedback.

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