Finding Mastery with Dr. Michael Gervais - What AI Can't Replace: The Ancient Skills That Will Save Us | Soren Gordhamer
Episode Date: July 9, 2025The question is not if AI will advance. It will. The real question is whether humans will advance with it?This week on The Finding Mastery Podcast, we sit down with Soren Gordhamer — founde...r of Wisdom 2.0, a global movement exploring the intersection of mindfulness, purpose, and technology.Soren’s latest book, The Essential: Discovering What Really Matters in an Age of Distraction, invites us to slow down, turn inward, and reconnect with what truly counts — even as the world speeds up around us.In this conversation, we explore:How suffering and early identity struggles shaped Soren’s lifeWhy achievement alone isn’t enough for true fulfillmentHow to stop performing and start beingWhy cultivating inner power is essential in the age of AIIf you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by technology or stuck chasing external success, this episode offers a grounded path forward — toward presence, purpose, and authentic living. Subscribe to our Youtube Channel for more conversations at the intersection of high performance, leadership, and wellbeing: https://www.youtube.com/c/FindingMasteryGet exclusive discounts and support our amazing sponsors! Go to: https://findingmastery.com/sponsors/Subscribe to the Finding Mastery newsletter for weekly high performance insights: https://www.findingmastery.com/newsletter Download Dr. Mike's Morning Mindset Routine: https://findingmastery.lpages.co/morningmindset!Follow on YouTube, Instagram, LinkedIn, and XSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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With AI, artificial intelligence, emerging in our culture right now,
there needs to be a similar renaissance of spirituality or of awakening
because the artificial intelligence is going to get so powerful
that it can need to be used for good or for bad.
The question is not if AI will advance. It will.
The real question is whether we as humans will advance with it.
A world where AI takes over and we lose contact with humanity, we lose contact with our own feeling,
that is a more dangerous world.
Welcome back, or welcome to the Finding Mastery podcast,
where we dive into the minds of the world's
greatest thinkers and doers.
I am your host, Dr. Michael Gervais,
by trade and training a high-performance psychologist.
Now the idea behind these conversations is really simple,
to sit with the extraordinary and learn.
To really learn about how they work from the inside out.
And in this week, we're joined by someone who is an expert at doing just that.
I've known and respected him for a long time.
My friend, Sorin Bordhammer.
Sorin is the founder of Wisdom 2.0,
a global event series at the intersection of wisdom and technology.
I meet with a lot of the tech founders and some of them are working their ass off to like build this company, to sell it, to take it public.
I see them when they sell it and they always hoped, oh this is the moment that I've been waiting for.
Finally, this desire in me gets satiated and they get everything they want and they're absolutely miserable
because no shift in the external world can satiate
what is unresolved in the internal world.
His new book, The Essential,
Discovering What Really Matters in an Age of Distraction
invites us to stop performing and start being.
Some people see the inherent beauty that they are,
but they're not willing to see any of the dark.
And some people, all they do is they see the dark
and they judge themselves.
And so can we hold both of those as truths?
With that, let's jump right into this week's conversation
with wisdom teacher and my friend, Soren.
Soren.
Yeah.
I am so happy that we're getting this time
to be able to do this.
We've been friends for a long time.
This is a great celebration. And before we dive into all the different places that we're going to
go, because I know how our conversations go, can you give like a flyover about why this book, why
now, and like really what were you trying to do by introducing this, your writing to us?
Well, first, it's wonderful to be here again with you, Mike.
The book is called The Essential,
Discovering What Really Matters in an Age of Distraction.
And it is what it says it is.
How do we discover and harness that
which is most essential in our lives?
And I think in this day of social media and pings
and all the things that we get that distract us,
how do we actually come back to what is true and real
and we live from that place?
One of the challenges, I think, for us in this conversation
is that we've been friends for a long time.
And I want to have a conversation
that helps me better understand you,
but at the same time have our community really get
the wealth of information and wisdom that you come from.
So if we started with this hinge idea that when I first met you, you were an observer
of teachers.
And I'm talking like the heavies of wisdom, you know, call it Thich Nhat Hanh, John Kabat-Zinn,
and and and. Okay.
And now in this book, I see you as a teacher.
So from the observer and the student to a teacher, I do want to understand that arc.
First, I want to start with your book that you just wrote.
It's really intimate.
It's really intimate.
It's really clear. It has a deep tone of honesty.
And at the same time, I think your teachers,
the teachers would say,
oh my gosh, it's an unbelievable reveal of wisdom.
So you hit the depth on both parts,
the depth of wisdom and the depth of intimacy.
So, well done.
Thank you.
I'm so happy for you.
Thank you. That means a lot.
Yeah.
That means a lot.
You know, I think when we go out to write a book,
we don't know exactly what it wants to be.
We start out with an idea, and then it tells us how it wants to unfold.
And as I started writing, I didn't have a lot of those personal experiences in it, but
something felt kind of stale.
I felt like I was repeating other people's words and I just didn't feel like authentically
connected to it.
And then I started going back in and going, hold it, where did this insight come from?
What was the source of this insight?
Oh, the source of that insight was when I was depressed as a 16 year old.
Oh yeah, what was that experience like?
Let me tell that story. Because that story says more than me just talking about depression
from like an analyst perspective. It like brings people into the actual experience.
And so for me, it was like a review of my life and different points of my life. And
then trying to really get back to can I share the experience of that? So the person who's
listening to it actually feels it.
Cause I actually think words,
words can be kind of dry and pointless in some ways,
it's the energy and it's the passion,
it's the authenticity behind the words.
That's what really matters.
And so I feel like I had to go really deep into myself
and be like, all right, where was this insight from?
And how can I share that as like,
vulnerably and openly as I can for the service of others?
Did you struggle with doing that?
Or did it feel like it was something different?
Like it was your, it was a responsibility to be honest.
Like, I know that when I wrote the first World of Mastery,
the first time I submitted it
for review, the feedback was like, you're not in it. And I didn't want a book about me. And then,
when I was writing, I was like, how much of this do I share? And then as I was going, I was like,
oh, this actually feels really healing in some respects and honest in others. So was this hard for you
or was this like super eloquently easy?
Because both.
So, you know, for 17 years, I've been a host.
I host a conference, Wisdom 2.0.
You've spoken several times.
All the big teachers have spoken, big tech leaders.
My job as a host is to prop up the person
that I'm talking to, right?
It's not about me.
It's about what is your wisdom that you have to share? And my job is to create up the person that I'm talking to, right? It's not about me, it's about what is your wisdom
that you have to share?
And my job is to create as clear an avenue
for that person to share what it is he or she has to share.
So I try not to bring myself in too much.
Well, my opinion about this is,
well, I have this lesson too.
It's really about that person.
So I had 17 years of training
about how not to bring myself into a story
because I think that was my skill set, not to bring myself into a story because I think
that was my skill set, is my skill set as a host.
So it's almost like a different muscle.
Like I'd been working this muscle.
I was like, oh, there's this other muscle over here that needs attention.
And was kind of screaming at me because it was really comfortable being a host and highlighting
other people's wisdom.
It's like, it became so easy that my psyche was like, sorry, that's too easy for you.
Like you're not learning in that same way.
What do you have to share?
What is it that you really feel like
if you were on your deathbed
and you had something to pass on,
what would those insights be?
So that muscle was getting over the sense
that I had something to share
and I was worthy to have something to share.
And once I felt that,
I really could connect to that sense of worthiness,
then the flow of it was really smooth.
And like, even now when you talk about vulnerable,
I'm like, oh shit, what did I actually say?
Because to me, it's just, that's what the book wanted to be.
And it's like, tell this story.
And so I was like, I was trying to be honest
to what the story wanted to be.
And my hope is that suffering unites us, right?
Pain unites us.
We think success unites us.
I think it's suffering and pain that unites us.
And if we can talk intimately and powerfully
about our own suffering and pain
in a way that shows a path to be free of that pain,
I don't know if there's a greatest service
we can do in the world and then provide
that for people.
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One of the teachers, I think it might be Thich Nhat Hanh, had suggested the greatest gift you can give others is your presence. Right? And so when you are present with another person, you see them and sometimes they see you, but you see all of them.
And that includes the suffering.
That includes the hurt that includes the
beautiful dreams and the compelling futures that they, they, they want to co-create.
When it comes to, I'm going to go back to this.
When it comes to sharing your hurt that you wrote about in the book, it sounds
like you, it was, you're really okay with it.
Can you talk about the work that you did
to get to that place, to share hurt?
Sure.
Eloquently and publicly in this case.
Yeah.
And the publicly experience is still unfolding
because it just came out.
So how it will be to see a bunch of people
who've read the book, that experience hasn't quite
happened to me yet because only a handful of people
have read the previews of the book.
Okay, do you think anyone's gonna say to you,
Boy Soren, man, maybe you should put this one back.
Maybe you should claw this one.
Buy all the copies, because this is not gonna.
I don't think so.
I don't think so either.
I don't think so.
Do you think, even if it was a marginal, just marginal. I don't think it. I don't think so either. But like, do you think, even if it was a marginal,
just marginal.
I don't think it's my business what people think of the book
in the deepest level.
My business is to write the book that I want to write.
If 99% of the people come up and tell me
this is not the right book, I'll consider it.
But I know in my heart why I wrote the book
and I know in my heart what the book wanted to be.
And I was very, very true to that.
And so that is my kind of like ground.
Okay, go back to the question I'm asking. What was the work to get to, before we get to the hurt,
what was the work to get to the clarity, I know my role in writing this book.
You know, over the years, I've learned to tap into what is the authentic expression
of true me and what are my old patterns and neuroses and traumas that I'm playing out
in life.
And in order to really understand that, I think I have to go back and look at what is
the pain and the suffering that I've been through.
How did that shape my personality?
And how is that personality still longing for something to happen to make him feel whole?
So for me, and I talk about this in the book, I grew up in this, you know, small town of Lubbock, Texas.
We were one of the few non-Christians.
You know, kids would tell us we're going to hell because we weren't going to church.
And it was really, really painful.
And then my mother left, we lived with my father, and so there was even more shame and more isolation.
And as part of that, I thought, I so there was even more shame and more isolation.
And as part of that, I thought,
I wanna get rid of this shame and isolation.
How am I gonna do it?
I'm gonna be a fucking success.
I'm gonna be so worthy and so important
and know all these famous people
that I will cover up that shame
that has been so deep inside me,
and no one will ever see that again,
because there'll be all these stars around me
and all this success around me.
Nobody will be able to even glimpse
that there's this other part that still has
this like deep shame and pain.
So that became my strategy.
And at some point-
Was that a conscious strategy or did you-
A survival strategy, I think.
When did you realize that that was the strategy
you adopted last year?
Yeah, I would like to say,
last year.
Yeah, I would like to say, you know, it was this weird thing. It was like, what if you imagine realized that that was the strategy adopted last year.
I would like to say, you know, it was this weird thing.
It was like, what if you imagine your entire life
was partly inspired by love and beautiful,
but it was also partly inspired
by an avoidance of a feeling?
Well, you have a quote.
Our identity often comes from the output of our hurt.
So when I wrote that down to, we're talking about it now,
I don't think it's a what if, I think it's a yes.
We have, to your point, suffering and hurt.
I like that you use hurt as opposed to what traditional
teachers would call suffering.
I'm not kind of pushing against suffering,
but the word hurt feels more available
than like this deep kind of tormented suffering.
But like, so I've got moments where my feelings,
my identity have been hurt.
And I clearly know because of the work I've done and the people in my life that have held mirrors up for me to say,
Hey, do you realize?
No, no, no, no.
So those stories, though, this is really great.
So my experience, people can have other experiences, my experiences, there's some level of hurt.
And then there's a narrative that we begin to play out,
right, that's mainly unconscious.
I'm success, I'm strong, I'm smart, I'm whatever.
I'm responsible.
I'm responsible, right?
And those become like a survival strategy.
They're not our authentic expression.
And then we go in the world and we actually find ways
sometimes to succeed based on that strategy,
based on those narratives.
But life being the brilliant thing that life is,
inevitably has us question those narratives.
We get to a point, and I see this with founders.
I meet with a lot of the tech founders,
and some of them are working their ass off
to build this company, to sell it, to take it public.
I see them when they sell it,
I see them when they take it public.
And they'd always hoped,
oh, this is the moment that I've been waiting for.
This is the moment where finally this desire in me gets satiated.
And they get everything they want, and they're absolutely miserable.
Because no shift in the external world can satiate what is unresolved in the internal world.
But the story running their life was, someday I'm going to be a success.
And they get everything and they don't feel internally like they feel like a success.
And they're like, I know, I just need to make a bigger company.
So then they keep on the hamster wheel, thinking that there's still something out there that
once they get it, it's going to satiate this feeling inside.
And the reason that that doesn't satiate is usually, I like to use the phrase younger
part. This is Dick Schwartz work with internal family system. Some people know about it. I really appreciate it
He's like there's just simply a younger part inside you that needs your attention and needs your care and needs your welcoming
And you don't have to cover that part up
You actually kind of need to befriend that part and that's what I had to do
I had gone through divorce and this is how I don't I't think I actually, I wrote a little bit about in this book, but the,
the more longer version is I'd been through a divorce. I have a son been through a divorce
the first time with his mom. And it was pretty tough because she not to go too much in detail.
She was fell in love with somebody else. And then I'm like kind of like trying to survive. My son is young.
And it's like, I kind of just moved on past that experience
to be honest with you.
I was living in New Mexico and I felt it a little bit,
but I was just like, shit, we got to keep going, right?
Life moves on.
Then I got into a second marriage, a second divorce.
So these are two divorces.
And I was like-
Must be them.
So for sure them, for sure them.
And so I was like, what is going on here?
What, there's something that I'm not seeing.
Did you, did you...
Yeah, did you open up like...
So she fell in love with somebody else is like the easy narrative.
But it was, you had a part in that.
Thank you, of course.
Yeah, so what was your part in that?
I think my part in that, let me, maybe my part in that. Thank you, of course. Yeah, so what was your part in that? I think my part in that,
let me, maybe my part in all of it
was that there was a part of me when I,
my mom had something of a nervous breakdown when I was 12.
She realized she was not married to the man that she loved.
She had five kids and she just couldn't handle
being in this role in this relationship.
So her, something in her was just like,
you gotta get the hell out of here.
So she left and then I was raised by my father.
And so that instilled a deep pain in me
that I'm basically unworthy.
Why would your own mother leave you?
There must be something wrong with me.
That was a narrative that happened.
Cause I couldn't come up with any other narrative
at the time.
I couldn't think like, oh, my mom's going through
enormous pain and suffering. And you know, that was beyond my capacity. I couldn't think like, oh, my mom's going through enormous pain and suffering.
And that was beyond my capacity.
I was about 12.
And that's what a 12 year old is supposed to do.
Like the world still revolves around the 12 year old.
Yeah, and you need your parents.
You can't think negatively,
at least I couldn't think negatively of them
and still orient in the world.
I had to come up with a different narrative.
So I think in a lot of my life,
particularly my intimate relationships,
that narrative was at play.
I have to like do, be a really, really good person
and kind of like not be true to, not express myself,
not set boundaries, not like be honest.
Because people leave if you're a mess.
If you're noisy.
Or even just imperfect.
Yeah, like I have to be perfect
or somebody's going to leave me.
And that pain and hurt was so strong
that my system was trying to avoid it.
And by trying to avoid it, I played it out in different ways.
Not to say there weren't beautiful aspects
that also happened in those engagements.
So your first wife, maybe second wife,
never really got to know you.
And so how can they fall in love with you
if they don't really know you?
They get a version of you that is trying to protect yourself
from people leaving.
Yeah, and I think that's probably true
in almost every relationship,
that there's parts that we're not quite willing to show.
And there was a pretty big part for me.
So I'm not saying like I'm through with all of that,
but there was a pretty big part for me
that I hadn't really understood.
And so my friend, a dear friend of mine,
we were talking and he said,
I have a therapist I want you to work with.
I was like, I was like, I was like, great.
And so he connected me to this therapist.
So during the COVID years, I had like a lot of work
that I did with this one really helpful therapist
who worked with me.
Isn't it amazing work?
Yeah.
Like I know I'm biased, it's my training,
but to sit with a person who, if you get it right,
that they really care about trying to help you unlock,
to see yourself in an honest way, it is great, it's hard.
Yeah.
Because if they do it right, they hold up a mirror
and they don't let you move away from it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I write, there's a sentence that I have in the book,
which I really appreciate it.
And it says, in order for us to kind of be
who we came here to be and who we truly are,
we have to go everywhere we don't wanna go
and see everything we don't wanna see.
And at the same time, know the inherent beauty that we are.
And I think when we lose either of those,
we get a little bit off.
So some people see the inherent beauty that they are. And I think when we lose either of those, we get a little bit off. So some people see the inherent beauty that they are,
but they're not willing to see any of the dark.
And some people, all they do is they see the dark
and they judge themselves and criticize themselves.
And I did this and oh, I was being wrong there, whatever.
And so can we hold both of those as truths?
We are this inherent beauty of life.
We're like the big bang was 13.8 billion years ago
and we're just expressions of these big bangs.
We're like these like,
we're just like these like wonderful, amazing creatures,
each one of us.
And there's things for us to learn.
And the amount of compassion that we need for ourselves
as we go through this process
is one of the biggest things that I see in the journey because people then feel
the awareness actually turns into judgment.
And that's when I think it's very, very hard for us
to like allow our hearts to open and deep.
Say that one more time, awareness turns into judgment.
So imagine if somebody was like walked around every day
with you and just told you everything you did wrong.
You could have used that word instead of this word. You walked a little fast, you drank a little quickly,
whatever all the judgments.
And you start to believe those judgments.
And so it's like, there's this shining,
this light of awareness that it may actually all be true,
but it's not very helpful at all,
because our system is not really capable
of bringing that forth.
I love that you bring this up, because this is the world
that elite athletes live in.
Yeah. So practice is more world that elite athletes live in.
So practice is more intense than game day
for some reason in one respect,
because in practice you have to get to the edge,
the messy edge where you make mistakes,
but you unlock something to grow.
And you have to do it in front of people
that are determining if you get play time or not.
You do it in front of your peers
that are trying to take your spot in the roster and everything that you do and don't do is publicly status and force
ranked against every other person in your entire universe of elite athletes,
as well as your teammates.
And it's really easy to get screwed up.
If you have a coach that says a three to one ratio up to a seven to one ratio,
Soren, that what you just did is amazing. Like do that again. Oh, I don't know if you can do that
again. That was so good Soren. Like the way you held your hands, like, oh, hey everyone, you see
what Soren did to the one, which is like, Soren, move your fucking feet. How many times I gotta tell you? Like it's that, you know, like that aggressive three to one,
seven to one.
And if you get those magical folks in your world,
it's awesome.
But if you get the ones that are the other direction,
it's problematic to thrive.
Well, even if you don't have those coaches,
effort is directly equatable to self judgment.
The harder you try,
the more likely that you're going to judge yourself
as inadequate.
Okay, interesting idea.
So if I don't really try very hard,
I'm probably not gonna judge myself.
But if I wanna be the absolute best at everything.
That's a self esteem saving mechanism.
Yes, yes.
But if I wanna be the absolute best at something,
the judgment has to turn on.
Now the question is, do I can take that judgment
not personally, or do I make it about me?
And I think that the greatest people I see,
they understand that, but they don't have the self image
and the self reflection.
They don't take that personally.
And so therefore they're able to like take on lessons
and move through them faster.
What kind of coach are you to yourself?
Interesting question.
I love challenges and I love to be a little bit on the edge. And this is why
AI is super interesting to me. There's an example that they gave of growth mindset that I've always
loved. I think it was Carol DeWitt in her book, which I know you're very familiar with. And
there was this kid, and there's two kids, one had growth mindset and one didn't.
And there was this really hard challenge that they were presenting the kid with.
And I guess he looked up at the teacher and he couldn't figure it out and he looked up
at the teacher and said, boy, do I love a good challenge.
And that's the energy that I try to cultivate.
And I look at like what's going on with our country now and people are like, oh, what's
AI going to do?
What's climate change going to do? What's climate change gonna do?
What's this new president gonna do?
Isn't it amazing to have a good challenge?
Like, isn't it awesome?
That it's going to bring out either the best
or the worst in us.
And we have an opportunity for it
to bring out the best in us.
And let's rise up to that challenge.
I've always liked the Zen story.
You may know it where a teacher draws a line
on the chalkboard.
And I always like to say she, even though traditionally
it's a guy, she asks her students,
how do you make this line shorter?
And so some students say, you erase some of the top,
and she says no, erase some of the bottom, she says no,
erase some of the middle, she says no.
They're like, how do you make that line shorter?
And she gets a second piece of chalk,
and she draws a second line next to the first.
So now there's, you know, this line, this line.
First line short, second line's long.
Yeah.
And she says, now that first line is shorter
by doing nothing to that first line.
But you expand your heart and you expand your own ability.
Inevitably that will then change
because all of a sudden you're not changing the thing,
you're changing your relationship to the thing.
I think this holds both for mastery, high performance, and wisdom, is that reference
points really matter.
In the understanding and revealing wisdom, reference points really matter.
In mastery and environments of high performance,
as many reference points as you have,
gives you context to be able to make
an informed guess on how something could go, right?
In environments of speed and consequence,
like, there's not enough time to really process, you know?
And so reference points become...
Like race car driving or something.
Yeah, right. So as many reference points become. Like race car driving or something. Yeah, right.
So as many reference points as we can experience,
it provides some sort of anchor for insights
and understandings later.
So I love that story.
Thank you for bringing that forward.
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What are the key insights from the book?
If you were to be really crisp with them, what would be the key insights for you in
the writing of this book?
Yeah, the number one piece we touched on a little bit,
which is we have narratives that run our lives.
We have a voice in the head.
We all do.
And if we don't understand that voice in the head,
it drives us even though we're not access to the driving wheel.
And so we think we're going to Dallas,
and we end up in San Francisco
because there's
these unconscious patterns that are behind the scenes taking us where we think we don't
want to go, but then there's this other unconscious patterns.
And that there's a path to actually becoming aware of these unconscious patterns and having
more choice.
And when we don't look and inquire inside our own capacity to be aware and own mental
world and physical
world. We can still compete and play, but we don't have near the superpower that we
have when we become curious about that dimension. And we keep thinking that the external world,
if I just get the right things in the external world, this internal world will be solved.
And I've seen the people that have succeeded beyond wildest dreams in the external world, like $100 billion
plus, like their value, not their company's value, or the most famous person you can imagine.
And you have two.
It's like, it doesn't mean their internal world shifts at all.
So I feel like the biggest teaching is if we take care of the inner world and do the
hard work of really seeing what's there to be seen and embracing and befriending all these parts of ourselves,
particularly the parts that we don't really like
and we want to get rid of,
there's a freedom that releases in that expression
and that life then mirrors that energy,
it mirrors that frequency.
So life kind of naturally gets better,
not because we're trying to make it better,
but we're trying to kind of make ourselves better.
And to me, that's kind of the biggest insight.
And if we begin to live from that place,
doors open and things shift and life unfolds
in a different way than we're resistance, we're holding,
we're kind of in more of this like narrative of like,
this is me and this is what I need to have happen.
And to me, that's the biggest shift that we need now.
And I think with AI, artificial intelligence,
emerging in our culture right now,
I feel very strongly that there needs to be
a similar renaissance of spirituality or of awakening
or of whatever you wanna name this,
because the artificial intelligence
is gonna get so powerful,
and it can either be used for good or for bad.
But unlike nuclear weapons,
which is just limited to certain countries
or certain people,
we're all getting the nuclear weapon. We're all getting access to AI. And so it becomes almost
imperative that we do the work on ourselves so we know how to use that effectively.
Insight one, we have this inner world. We've built narratives. Much of those narratives are
squarely resting on hurt. And so we need to examine to really understand that. Insight
number two is that once we become more aware of those non-conscious patterns, right? Then
we become internally powerful. And the third is we're going to need a resurgence of a deeper dimension of our human experience
to combat the purely surgical cognitive right angles of AI.
Yeah.
And I'd say the last one I would add to that would be as more we're in that space, that
creative space, or less trapped in our own narratives about how life should be and how
we should be and all the things, There's a creative force that's unleashed
that we can apply to whatever we do
and to whatever situation that we're in.
And I think the work, like me writing a book,
the more I freed myself, the more the book just came.
And the more I didn't free myself.
Did you write this in a flow state?
Most of it felt like a flow state to me.
There was like a conscious editing that happened afterwards.
But I've been inspired by Rick Rubin
and Rick Rubin's work has touched me.
And I really like what he said that you write a book
or you do a creative art,
it's none of your business,
whatever other people think about it,
you do it for you.
And so I was very honest to myself,
what does this want to happen?
What does this want to be?
And I have a chapter in there where we talk about,
what do I want to do is such an interesting question
because I think that's an important question,
but maybe the deeper question is,
what wants to come through me?
And you're harnessing a deeper intelligence
and you're realizing your life is not an accident.
You actually came here to participate
in some kind of karmic unfolding.
And when you tap into that,
that's where there's like a power,
a superpower that we can all harness. And I feel like that's the invitation of our time is to tap into that, that's where there's like a power, a superpower that we can all harness.
And I feel like that's the invitation of our time.
It's a tap into that.
Are you pointing to like the concept that there's a soul?
Are you pointing to a collective consciousness
that gets bundled in this thing called Soren
or bundled in this thing called Mike?
I think it's, for me, it's more like
there is an intelligence of the universe
that we can all tap into at certain times.
And when you meet someone, for example,
and they say something to you,
they have some project they wanna do,
or there's some shift,
and you meet that person and you can tell,
this is not driven by them.
This is driven by something much bigger than them.
I can feel that resonance. Like, I feel like something is coming through them. I can feel that resonance.
I feel like something is coming through them and watch out.
Is there in your philosophy, is there a God?
I just think it is like universal intelligence.
And it's not a human or person or one entity that has a beard and sits in the clouds and
stuff.
But I do, my experience and my sense
is there is this kind of innate intelligence
that we all are.
So it's not like we aren't that.
We are that expression, and we all have access to that.
Did that innate intelligence cause the Big Bang
or an accident from it?
That's a great question, and I don't know.
But I know that it is that expression.
If you had to know right now. I would say it caused it.
So you go like an unmoved mover, clockmakers or watchmakers, watchmaker. Okay. And okay, boom,
it happens. Here we are. In this form, in this dance.
And what are we trying to do?
Well, so this is a great question. Is all humanity trying to do something else
or is each human have their own karmic assignment
that's wanting to play out?
And I've always liked,
Eckhart Tolle, as we have looking at this,
he says we have two purposes.
We have a primary purpose and a secondary purpose.
The primary purpose is to be right here right now,
because this is the only moment we have.
It's hard to argue with that, right?
The past is a dream, the future is a dream.
Like this is all we know is I'm here with you
and consciousness is emerging, here we are.
That's all we know.
And then the second-
Wait, before we get to the second,
this is a primary purpose.
What is your responsibility?
To be as present as possible in this moment. And what are you doing in this moment to be as present as possible in this moment.
And what are you doing in this moment
to be as present as possible?
When I notice my mind going,
what's gonna happen in the future?
What happened in the past?
What do I say to impress him?
What do I say to impress your listeners?
Is that the narrative that is pulling you from?
Yeah.
From what?
From being present with this moment.
So for example, if I'm thinking, are people enjoying this?
I need to say something really brilliant and wise
and like touching, I need to be more vulnerable,
whatever the thing is, right?
Versus like, oh, can I be in the discomfort?
So is this moment uncomfortable?
No, but I mean, being in the not knowing.
So for example, if I, I see this a lot.
So if I'm uncomfortable with silence,
I have to constantly create words
because I can't be in the silence.
So as part of your responsibility to be a good custodian
of your primary purpose is to be here.
And to notice what takes me out of here.
And there's themes.
There's tripwires and themes and streams
and there's patterns based on the narrative
that's oftentimes built from hurt.
Okay.
And one of the ways that we do that
is we come in with our record player playing.
So let's say you interview me
and I just tell the same story 12, 15 times.
You see these with people who give a talk.
It's the same talk and it's just on record.
And I think the opportunity in life
is to get out of that record and actually be here
and what is wanting to emerge between us right now
in this moment, unedited and unscripted.
And it's just like life is unfolding
and we're just a part of that unfolding.
And to me, that's super rich and exciting.
And do you approach the unfolding,
unpredictable, unknown moment?
Uh-huh.
Do you approach it, for the most part, let's say,
as something to explore or something to perform?
In my ideal moments, something to explore.
To explore.
And is it, because it's unknown and unpredictable
and unfolding, is it scary or is it safe?
The energy is unknown and the energy is unknown, right?
Because it's emergent, but the form that it takes
usually has an expression.
So that's the second purpose, which is just like,
what's my, the one purpose never changes.
It's to be in the timeless dimension right here, right now,
to the best of our possibility.
And then to listen to what is the form
that wants to take shape in me?
Is it a project?
Is it a podcast?
Is it a book?
Is it a new job?
Is it a nonprofit?
Is it some change of career?
There's usually something that's emergent
that wants to take shape.
Now, if you ever get too focused on the thing
and you forget about this moment, you lose the flow. Because now the thing becomes
the thing and you lose track with the expression of what is emergent in the moment. I hope
that makes sense.
Yeah. So concretely, you had a book that you were, it's a thing that wanted to emerge,
a secondary purpose, if you will. but the primary purpose was to be true to
the words that were, and the ideas that were coming forward, even if they were dangerous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
And to be in each one of those moments to the best of my ability and to notice, oh,
when I get this book done, I'm going to become.
So there's no feeling of a whole inside me.
Like the Buddha said, I teach the, I Like the Buddha said, I offer the teaching,
there's glorious in the beginning,
glorious in the middle, and glorious in the end.
And I think the most creative acts, most beautiful acts,
there's a love of the art, and there's love in the beginning,
there's love in the middle, and there's love at the end,
and it's hard, but you're loving the hard.
And then when you release it, there's no hope for agenda
that says, if this happens, I will be more complete
because it's coming from completion.
It's not coming from lack, it's coming from fullness.
I think that's one of the beautiful dances of life is,
are we coming from lack?
Are we coming from fullness?
And if we're coming from lack,
what is that lack that we're still feeling?
And in my experience, the most successful people can come from incredible lack.
They're still trying to get something to happen so that they feel whole.
And the journey is, as you know, Mike, is like, can we tap into that internally
so that our expressions come from a different place?
Hard to do. Easier to do when you can really study yourself
and know yourself.
I think psychology is the study of self
and the study of others, but it's really the study of self.
How does thought one work with thought two?
How does thought one and two work with emotion A
and feeling B?
And like that broth, when you really study it,
you can become playful with it.
And I wish there was a pill to take,
I wish there was a fast track.
The only thing I would add to that is,
what if the universe, so all that is true,
and then what if you have a relationship
with this universal intelligence, you have a relationship.
There's something it's trying to do through you.
I don't get that.
You don't get that, okay.
Yeah, and I know that,
I think I'm unpopular by saying that, okay?
Especially in our world.
Yeah, in LA, it depends on which world you're in.
In Texas, you're not.
No, no.
Maybe Austin.
No, well, like, okay, the gospel belt would say, what do you mean that we call that God?
And so-
And I grew up in West Texas, by the way.
So I grew up in the Bible belt.
And so I know that world too, and I appreciate that world.
And people have different languaging for that world.
And maybe this is just my own coping mechanism.
And it's not so much a belief, but it's more of an orientation.
And I'm not like people have to have this orientation,
but my particular orientation is,
I tend to get more energized
when I look at what wants to come through me,
being I'm in relationship with this whole world of things.
And if I am clear about that relationship,
I can see what's needed
and I can kind of address what's needed.
And that's what I try to do.
That I understand.
The part about being in a relationship with,
and now I get to fill in the blank,
with experience, with what is, with mother nature,
which by the way, you and I are quote unquote, mother nature.
It's not the beautiful pond.
It's, it's us.
Yeah.
So I totally get the synergy that comes from being in harmony, even when it's like, it
seems prickly, but like to find that that's where the word fluid and flow state comes
from to find that slipstream.
I totally understand that.
Yeah.
Okay. Here's a fear I have.
As I'm even questioning these things
about a spiritual domain,
that if the end of the world happens right now,
this is my training early in the Christian faith.
Like, if you don't kind of say that there's a Jesus
and a God, like, you're not invited to the club after.
You better, the fear-based
approach is like, I want to revolt against it. This is my kind of counterculture, like, don't tell me.
This is what I grew up with and I counter it too, yeah.
And then, but I'm afraid to question it because if I stay too long in the open question
and the end of the world happens for me, then I'm not invited to the party, the pearly gate party.
Yeah.
So that scares me a little bit to even question it, but I'm staying true to the actual questioning.
You can always say it just for us.
Just say it for us.
Jesus died for your sins or whatever.
Put an asterisk next to it.
Yeah, right. Yeah.
Or we could look at it like, so what's this party that we're,
what is this party that we think is going to happen?
So I love this idea, heaven on earth, hell on earth. I love that idea that you can be tortured here or find the most beautiful expression of the harmony of things. Okay,
I'm totally now with that and I love this idea. So, my wife and Lisa, we've been together.
I love Christianity. I love aspects of Christianity. I think it's some of the most deepest teachings there are.
I love it too.
I think the Trinity is like my jam.
And I have a hard time understanding the language
and the universality of what God is.
Okay, pause the blasphemy for just a moment.
I'm gonna go back to this idea that,
will you recognize me in the next form?
Call it the pearly gates of heaven or reincarnation.
Will you recognize me?
Well, who recognized you?
Exactly.
Okay. So like, for example, Lisa and I.
Oh, got it.
Do I? Of course I recognize Lisa in a crowded mall in somewhere.
Okay. Of course I recognize Lisa in a crowded mall in somewhere, if like, okay, okay.
But would I recognize the formless human,
the formless essence in a different form?
Whether that is the afterlife
or that is the next go around we get.
I love that idea.
That forces me like, well, I know you've sworn
in the next form if there is one.
And for me to do that,
I've got to get past the way you look. I got to get past the words that you use, and I've got to
understand the essence of like who you're working on being. And you're saying, look, I'm just trying
to get this fluid nature of like whatever sources behind me. I got to be open the aperture and let
it flow through. Yeah.
Okay.
So anyways.
Yeah, what I love about the Christian faith is the dedication to Spirit and the dedication
to…
The animation of the, quote unquote, Holy Spirit.
The animation of Spirit?
There's something bigger than us and
also us that wants expression.
And that part of that is to be serviced to the whole, right?
And to not just look out for ourselves, but to serve the poor and to be tending to this
humanity.
To be part of something bigger.
That we can't reject any of these parts of humanity that are also us.
And I think that, call it whatever you wanna call it,
but I think there is a movement of energy of life
that I like to try to follow.
And like right now I'm a lot focused on AI.
Whenever I focus on the AI world, my inner world says,
yes, you need to be doing that.
Now, is that just me?
Or is that something that's like guiding me that's telling me,
yes, go this way or is that just my own?
I don't know.
Well, if you do the PNL, it probably makes some sense to focus on wisdom and AI, which is your intersection.
But it's more of an energy thing.
Like, so in my rational mind, this is great, I think to talk about, there's all these things like, oh, this makes logical sense,
but it might not make intuitive or energetic sense at all.
And what I've learned is you have to go with the energy
because that's all you have.
Otherwise, you're just somebody logically doing
whatever you think you're supposed to do,
but there's no life force in that.
I want to take a moment to tell you about a podcast
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podcasts.
You, you, you were clear in your writings and you've hinted at it in this
conversation that there's outer power, which is all of the outwardly celebrations,
big car, big watch, big money, big bank account.
Nothing wrong with all of it, but yeah.
You're good.
And then there's inner power.
How do you articulate inner power?
I tell this story in there being with Thich Nhat Hanh
at this Mark Benioff's house,
as CEO of Salesforce.
Hold on, the humble brag here is so good. Like Thich Nhat Hanh and Benioff. Benioff's house is CEO Sales for All. Hold on, the humble brag here is so good.
Like, Ticknott Hahn and Benioff.
Benioff's house.
Yeah, in his house.
Yeah, so by the way, it's just,
this is more for the listener,
is that Ticknott Hahn is a mentor of mine.
I've never met him. Oh, wow.
I've never met him. Oh, really?
Oh, he's amazing.
Yeah, so the fact- He passed away,
we all know, but yeah.
Yeah, so the fact that you got to spend time with him.
He's a walking Buddha Christ on earth.
It was so wonderful to have time with him in this life.
I've done a few things with him.
I'll send you a picture of us.
I'm walking, doing walking meditation with him.
Stop.
And there's like 20 of us, we're in Santa Barbara.
I'm supposed to be happy right now for you.
No, but I'm like two feet above everybody else.
This is like one white guy, like sticking his head out
and it's like a Thai and all the Vietnamese walking.
It's like a funny, it's a funny picture.
But he really impacted me too.
I can't get enough of him.
He knows stuff. He talks about pain, he talks about hurt,
he talks about suffering, and he talks about love,
and he talks about compassion,
and he's seen everything happen in Vietnam,
and he lost so many people and the culture,
and he found a way to keep his heart open
and to talk about the values that we all care about.
And he's, there's this phrase,
I actually got this from Stephen Levine,
but he said, there's no way to know the truth.
You can only be the truth.
So a lot of people who know the truth
and they can repeat and tell you all these things,
but to be the truth, to live the truth,
like Thich Nhat Hanh walks in a room and you feel it
because he lives it, not because he knows it.
And that's all of us, all of that, that same capacity, right?
To like really be the truth.
And like, what is it to be in that space?
And so this particular-
That's rad.
I wish I would have had a chance to meet Thich Nhat Hanh,
but I know I didn't try hard enough, but-
He's still here in his own way.
So we, his students would call him Ty.
He wants teacher, which the thing in Ty would say sometimes,
he would say, well, one, when he did his retreats,
the kids would come up first.
So there'd be like a thousand or hundreds of people
in the room and all the kids would come up to the front
and he'd tell them a story.
And we would all just sit there for like 30 minutes
while he told the children a story.
But the stories had profound teachings, right?
But he loved the kids and he wanted to make sure
the kids actually were the ones who like
got the best teachings and then the adults
would get the teachings.
But he used to say, when you woke up this morning,
can you enjoy your non-toothache?
Did you enjoy your non-toothache?
Like what do you mean?
You don't have a toothache.
Like yeah, did you enjoy your non-toothache? Or, what do you mean? You don't have a toothache. Like, yeah, did
you enjoy your non-toothache or do you wake up thinking of all the things that you have
that are your problems? Are you following your problems or can you enjoy your non-toothache?
And just that teaching alone, when I wake up in the morning, can I enjoy my non-toothache?
If I just did that, that like sense of gratitude and that sense of like awareness of the appreciation
of what we have, like, can we wake up in the morning and appreciate that our eyes can see? And he did that, that sense of gratitude and that sense of awareness of the appreciation
of what we have.
Can we wake up in the morning and appreciate
that our eyes can see?
Can we wake up in the morning
and appreciate that we can breathe?
And he was tapped into that in such a profound way.
And so there was this event at Mark's house
that had all the big tech CEOs there.
And they all wanted to go.
There was a lot of them, 30 or so,
of the big leaders in tech.
And they were there and they were sitting
and Ty would go on.
He went on for maybe like an hour and a half, two hours.
And it was friend of mine.
Did you coordinate this?
No, but my friend coordinated it.
So I got snuck in through my friend.
I wasn't one of the tech CEOs.
My friend's like, hey, I got an extra spot.
You want to sneak in?
I was like, sure, happy to.
And Benioff is actually a beautiful person
in terms of really wanting to support
like wisdom and compassion.
And so I think it was out of his goodness of his heart
that he's like, wow, I've found this amazing teacher.
I want to share this teacher with other people
who might benefit.
So it was coming from, I think, a really good hearted place.
And so two things happened. One is I looked from, I think, a really good-hearted place. And so two things happen.
One is I looked around and I'm like, who has the power in this room? All these people are sitting
on the floor while they listen to him on the stage. They have traditional power, but he's got
something else and they've all come to find what that is. And what is that power that he has that they're coming to find?
So that became a really interesting question for me.
I was like, oh, there's different kinds of power because clearly he has this power and
they know it.
And could we all have the capacity to have that power?
And at one point he looked in the audience of all these tech leaders and said,
if you're not helping people better connect with themselves
and help people better connect with nature,
you're in the wrong business.
And he invited them to explore their life
and what they're actually creating.
And he was somebody who had that courage and had that power.
And I think that's why we loved him
was he found a way to be the truth. And I think that's why we loved him, was he found a way to be the truth.
And I think that's the gift.
He's not being the truth when he shows up to give a talk.
He's being the truth when he goes to the bathroom.
He's being the truth when he's late for something.
He's being the truth.
Thank you for that image.
When he's, whatever he's doing, he's in the zone.
So it's not like, oh, I'm playing the game now.
I'm gonna be in the zone.
Yeah, I'll keep this nameless,
but there was a Zen teacher at Wisdom 2.0
and he did this amazing moment on stage.
We were both backstage.
He came off and I was getting ready to go on
and we had an exchange.
And I was like super excited to have a moment
to say thank you for your teachings. And I was like, oh no have a moment to say, thank you for your teachings.
And I was like, oh no, this is not, wait a minute.
What am I seeing and feeling?
Like it was like a-
A different energy.
I mean, and I was like, oh, this is, what's that saying?
Never meet your heroes or whatever.
Like I was like, oh, this is a bummer.
And then I thought, wait, maybe this is me too.
Like, I get tired, I get cranky.
I get like, you know, like,
and so it was a cool moment to remember that
sages are people.
Yeah, yeah.
And in my mind, Tai was not, he floated, you know, so.
I never saw, you know, the, Eckhart,
a lot of teachers have this great idea where it's like,
you think you're going to spiritual teachings,
you're gonna go to Bali or something
and get massages and meditate every day,
but then you get to the airport and your flight's canceled
and it's like, you might learn more about yourself
with that flight getting canceled
that you'll learn from going into your,
so we have these ideas,
oh, spiritual growth looks like this,
or oh, when I get here, I'm actually going to grow spiritually, or whatever.
And what I find is that life delivers us.
If we pay attention, life continually delivers us teachings,
regardless if we're in the Himalayas or LA traffic or somewhere else.
And our job is just to pay attention and listen,
and we can get all the teachings that we need.
And so that Zen teacher experience
was like a great teaching, right?
Like it could be like, oh, what a horrible person,
or it could be like, wow, I realized I need to have
compassion for everybody.
Cause everybody has their moments.
Yeah, they're suffering.
And maybe I can have compassion for myself
in those moments.
Can you maybe teach us a meditation, like pretty concretely, that you're using?
I want to ask, I don't want to be disrespectful to your practices,
but I do want to ask like one that maybe you learned from Thich Nhat Hanh,
that has been important to you that the listener can be like, well, what, why?
Like, what is it that they do?
Meaning Thich Nhat Hanh, you, maybe me,
like as a practice.
So one of the things that when the kids would come up
in front of him, I remember him asking them once,
so why do we wash the dishes?
And the kids were like, we wash the dishes
to clean the dishes.
No, no, we wash dishes because our parents tell us to wash the dishes.
No, we wash the dishes in order to wash the dishes.
To have the experience of washing the dishes.
We wash the dishes to be in the full experience of washing the dishes.
Why do we walk?
We walk not to get somewhere.
We walk to enjoy the experience of walking.
And I don't know if you meant like lead a meditation,
but like to me that was one of his deepest practices
was like, can we be with our experience, whatever it is.
Now he is super interesting and I wish he was alive today
because it'd be so amazing to talk to him about this work
is he was much more about cultivating the goodness inside
you. This is my experience of him, right? So breathing in, I smile. Breathing in, I
call my body. Breathing out, I smile. So he'd have these like practices which are on all
his books, like breathing in, I call my body. Breathing out, I smile. Different sayings.
Breathing in, I see my eyes. Breathing out, You know, and that's where I was hoping you would go.
Is that a practice that you use?
I did, I don't have, that's not active practice
for me now. It's not.
But when I was working more with his material,
those are practices that I did more often
and like telephone meditation.
So there's your cell phone rings, breathing in,
I can't remember the exact phrase,
but breathing in, I call my body, breathing out, I smile.
Breathing in, I know my words can create suffering or peace.
I vow to create peace.
Mike, how are you doing?
Yeah, nice to hear from you.
The energy in which you're answering that call
is very different having that little moment.
So I think it lives with me in different ways,
but I don't have that as a formal practice right now.
I can say that one of the things I'm super curious about
is resistance to experience.
And so there's an experience
and how are we relating to that experience?
And often when I can feel a tension in my body,
I notice that there's some resistance
to something happening.
And I've noticed this when I interview people,
like sometimes it's just a moment of silence
and I get nervous, I get uncomfortable
because I think I'm supposed to be creating content, right?
Like that's the job is to create content.
And I'm like, oh, what's that story that's overlying that?
Like, can I just be quiet for a moment and not know and be in the not knowing?
But what are the things that I have a hard time being with?
Anger is another one.
Like anger is something when anger arises, I get really nervous.
I get like tense around it.
And so I've been really working with like, huh, can I just invite anger, the energy of
anger and get to know it better? So one of my practices is to see like,
what am I not inviting and can I be able
to invite that more?
You probably don't know this,
but you interviewed me at Wisdom 2.0
and you created so much space for me.
It was awesome.
So whatever you did in that moment,
it was years ago, but you created,
you opened up the aperture
for me to feel really free to talk about ideas
that were interesting to me.
And you didn't talk over or have too long of space,
but after something was said,
you let it just sit there for a moment.
It was awesome.
It was a really nice, I felt like an energetic exchange
between the two of us of ideas.
And like, so you're really good at that.
And thank you for that.
The second thing I wanna thank you for is that
there was a moment maybe a couple of years after that,
that you said something in passing that really helped me.
I don't think I've ever told you this.
No, no, no.
Yeah. So you said something to the effect of,
I don't think I've ever told you this. No, no, no.
Yeah.
So you said something to the effect of,
Mike, the way that you're describing
the practice of getting to wisdom,
the practices and the work is really refreshing.
Things like, Mike, and you said it,
because I'll say like,
you can train your craft, your body and your mind,
and becoming more aware of your thoughts, words and actions.
You know, like these phrases that make sense to me and you're like, we need some of that.
And so it gave me, you gave me this permission to say, keep going. You're onto something.
And I just want to thank you for opening up that aperture. I've used that phrase like three or four times,
but you definitely have done that for me.
And so thank you.
And also thank you for introducing me to John Kabat-Zinn,
who's been another teacher of mine from a distance
and somewhat up close.
I think what I saw in you,
so we have like all these wonderful teachers,
with John or Techno Han, but then we have our own expression of it and they can't do what you do because they
don't know athletes, they don't know big for high performers, but you know the language
that that needs to be shared so that it's digestible to that population.
And so that's why I was encouraging you.
It's like you don't need to be a monk to have wisdom to share.
And I was seeing that you were bringing it
into this area of performance, which is so powerful.
And only you or somebody with your background
has the right medicine to do that
because you live and breathe that world.
You understand that world.
And so I was always like so excited to see
that that expression was taking a different form.
It was awesome.
And that's what we all need to do.
If you're listening out there,
like you have your own expression,
like you have your own teachings,
you have your own offerings.
You don't need to have special degrees
or a million followers on YouTube or whatever it is.
We each have our own expression
and we can each be that truth.
And I think that's the invitation we wanna make.
I wanna make more and more.
Is that that whatever you see in that person, that is you.
If some part of you is that person.
So let's take that forward.
Is that how in your writings,
presenting your ideas formally on paper,
how was that to present your ideas with-
With other people's-
In reflection of some of the great teachers of our time.
It's a little nerve-racking because like you with Thich Nhat Hanh and others,
like I've had such influence from these teachers who are just like,
words don't really do it justice. It's like the Buddha said that the greatest gift you can give
is the gift of Dharma, which just means truth or means truth or teachings. I could bestow on you all kinds of material gifts or whatever, and yet the gift of anything
that awakens a person, what is there a better gift that allows their heart to be more freed,
allows their mind to be more free?
So the gift of truth is the greatest gift.
And so I'm trying to be of service to that gift and saying, okay, Soren,
you've had all these unique experiences. So I taught meditation to juvenile hall kids
in New York City, which I share stories about that. I walked across all these different
countries. I share stories about that.
Dumpster dives.
Dumpster dives through different countries. Yeah. I've seen a lot of different experiences.
And what I loved about writing the book was like, there'd be one story about a kid in juvenile hall
and the wisdom that I learned from this kid, Jamal.
The next chapter would be this event with Techno Han
or the Dalai Lama, where I learned something.
The next event might be like a tech leader
that I learned something from.
And what I'd really hope to get across Mike is like,
it's every, it takes, it's into every form.
Like your children are incredible teachers,
your grandparents, your parents, your friends,
like your enemies, like all these are kind of these teachings.
And so I think the gift that I tried to present was like,
what is my, if we're all offering our wisdom to the world,
what is it that I wanna share?
So I have a story from you with my son,
where he really wanted to be the best basketball player
in the world and I was trying to help him
be the best basketball player in the world.
And I was like, Mike, what do I do with this?
And I was like, what do you say to athletes
before they go out on the court or the field?
And you might've changed your mind from this.
And you said, so I always say the same thing.
I was like, what's that?
You said, you have everything you need inside you.
And that really shifted my relationship with my son.
Cause I was like, it's not about winning.
It's not about playing great.
It's about discovering who you are and living from that.
So what I, the beautiful thing I got was I got to take in
all these pieces and be able to share what I got from you.
There's some things I'm taking on. There's some things I'm taking on,
there's some things from different teachers,
but inevitably there were some chapters that were just me.
It's just my story, my experience.
And if I have one hope, Mike,
is that it lands with people in a way that empowers them.
And they feel like, wow, what is the wisdom I have to share
and how do I bring that out?
But that that potential is inside each one of us. And the wisdom I have to share and how do I bring that out? But that that
potential is inside each one of us. And the opportunity we have this life is to bring
it forth because it doesn't matter if I say it or you say it or take it on. Who cares?
What matters is like it starts to speak to them and they start to bring it forth in the
way that they want to bring it forth.
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Bring us home on, you've been sitting at the intersection of wisdom and technology for 20
years, 15 years. Yeah, we've been doing the conference for 20 years. 20 years. You've
been practicing, you've had a wisdom practice for 40 years. Meditation. I started in those
teenagers. Through suffering. I don't know if I would have started without suffering. Yes, amen. Suffering helped. And now we're in this emergence of AI that is happening in lightning speed.
What are the insights or what do you want us to think about or what can you point us
to to grok around the intersection of wisdom and AI?
Wow.
It's such a really important question.
I'm just gonna tell, I wanna answer that one
and tell briefly how it happened to me.
You know, sometimes you're living your life
and you're trying to mind your own business
and then something enters and you're like, shit.
Like really?
You just know your call to tend to it.
And so I was living my life during my conference.
I had heard that I wanted to do something on AI.
This is three years ago.
I was like hearing that it was gonna be a thing,
but there was nothing really anyone was using.
I had heard through the great mind
that Sam Altman was doing something,
but no idea what he was doing.
But I threw a friend pinged him was like,
would you come to this conference on wisdom
and consciousness and AI and stuff?
And he got back instantly.
He's like, absolutely love to.
And he was gonna be with Jack Kornfield,
one of his teachers and mentors.
Great teacher.
Yeah, wonderful, and then a month later,
they launched ChatGBT, he and OpenAI launched ChatGBT,
and it kind of takes the world by storm.
And then I met him at the conference
and got a chance to spend some time with him and Jack,
and all of a sudden I started to see
the power of what was coming, like how he talked about it
and how other people talked about it.
I was like, I thought this was a sci-fi thing
that was gonna happen in our kids' generation.
It's actually happening now and it's happening really fast
and it has enormous, enormous power for good
and it has enormous power for misinformation
and for creating illnesses and all kinds of
things.
And so that moment was a moment when I realized this is what I need to attend to and try to
do my part to harness in a positive way.
And I think one of the beautiful things about AI, at least so far, is it has all the knowledge
in the world.
It evens the playing field of knowledge, Like we're all brilliant all of a sudden.
But wisdom is something different.
I think it calls on us to develop our wisdom
because wisdom is from intimate depth of experience.
And that's really what we need to balance
these two worlds out.
Knowledge is wonderful, love it.
And wisdom is really, wisdom and compassion
is the glue that keeps the society together.
And so the invitation of artificial intelligence,
I believe, is to harness our own innate inner intelligence
and to bring that forth in the world.
And the two together can go really, really well together.
A world where AI takes over and we lose contact
with humanity, we lose contact with our own feelings,
we lose contact with our own humanity,
that I feel like is a more dangerous world. And one of the insights in the book is that
you're pretty certain that AI is going to advance.
It's going to get better.
And then you pose the question, are we?
Are we going to advance, yeah.
And so what you're pointing to is,
are we going to be able to counterbalance the speed
and of accessing knowledge at our fingertips with wisdom.
So point us to a couple of practices
to help folks that say, you know,
I feel a little overstressed, under recovered.
I feel a little overwhelmed by the pace and speed of things.
I want to be grounded and have an invitation
to the unfolding moment in a way that feels welcoming.
And I love the challenge as opposed to overwhelmed
and like kind of shutting it down and retracting from it.
So give us a couple pointers that you would see.
I'm gonna do that and I'm gonna give a quick little context
if I can.
So part of what's happening now is,
it used to be that coders working nine to five,
five days a week were developing the AI,
and so it moved at a certain pace.
Now, increasingly, it's AI that works 24-7,
you know, seven days a week doing the AI,
and so the speed at which it's happening
is just going to increase significantly
over the next year or two because of the advancements
in the artificial intelligence themselves being able to guide the next year or two because of the advancements in the artificial intelligence themselves
being able to guide the next artificial intelligence.
And that's just kind of the inevitable path that happens.
And so this is being used in a lot of fronts.
One of the ways it's been particularly used
is in social media.
So there is like a supercomputer that they have
of each one of us of everything we've ever liked
and everything we've ever commented on.
And so it's able to present to us the perfect image,
the perfect video, the perfect thing
that does what they want it to do,
which is to keep us on the platform.
So it optimizes-
These waves that show up on my Instagram
are on the bottom turns,
and the top turns that some of these guys are doing.
Yeah, and it's beautiful in one aspect.
It optimizes for engagement, right?
All it says is keep Mike on the platform as long as you can,
give him whatever it is.
They don't tell it what to put,
but they just say optimize for this.
So as that AI gets smarter and smarter
and knows you better and better,
it can do certain things.
But this is partly why, like going out and exercising,
going to spending time with friends,
going out in nature in some ways is very, very hard
because the algorithm knows us so well
and depending on what the platform's intentions are,
which is usually to keep us on, it's getting better.
On their screen.
Yeah, it's getting better at doing that.
Because they can sell.
That's how they monetize everything.
Through ads and or otherwise.
Yeah, so if we stop putting our attention on that, it goes kaput, like there's no real anything. getting better at doing that. Because they can sell. That's how they monetize everything. Through ads and or otherwise.
Yeah, so if we stop putting our attention on that,
it goes kaput, like there's no real anything there.
Like we have to, our attention is the gasoline
that keeps the fuel going.
And I'm not saying that's a bad thing,
I'm just trying to say that if you notice yourself
increasingly mesmerized by what you're seeing,
there's probably a reason.
And the reason is that the AI is getting better
at delivering what it wants to deliver.
So then coming back to what we can do,
friendships, huge, human contact, huge.
And I just encourage people to experiment in a day.
Spend a day looking at the computer,
don't actually connect with humans. And then spend the next day and try to find some experiment in a day. Spend a day looking at the computer, don't actually connect with humans.
And then spend the next day
and try to find some human contact that day.
Invite a friend for lunch, invite a friend for a walk.
Call someone and talk to them just out of the blue.
Hey, how are you doing?
What's going on with your life?
Make some genuine human contact
and notice your day when that happens
and notice your day when that doesn't happen.
So I think that's a huge one.
The second one is nature has a way of fueling us
that I don't know many other things do.
So whether that's just walking down your street
and looking at a tree and looking at birds
and looking at whatever you can see
that's just a part of the natural world,
there's some way in which our nervous system calms
and just like remembers, oh, it's okay.
You know, like there's a way that that softens.
And exercise is another way I think that moves energy.
And then I know meditation's really hard for people.
It's hard for me sometimes too.
But to whatever, put on a music tape,
put on whatever you can do that just
allows you to tap into your inner world as best you can and get a sense of like, okay,
there's this external climate, but there's also an internal climate.
And can I just become curious about that internal climate?
And you can do a guided meditation if you want, but, or you can just listen to music
and just kind of like close your eyes and have that inquiry.
But as you get to know that inner world,
it becomes less scary and becomes more curious.
And you're just like,
oh my goodness, there's things for me to learn there.
So to me, that's part of my medicines.
And I did that this morning, I had a seven o'clock call.
I was like, I usually have a seven o'clock call,
got up, meditated for 30 minutes
because I knew that it's so interesting.
For me, it's like, I'm gonna make less mistakes.
I don't have more quality experience
if I tend to the most important thing,
which is just my own mind and heart,
versus like, oh, I gotta get this done, this done.
I'm actually gonna get more done in a more powerful way
if I tend to my being first.
So even though it's hard sometimes,
I got so much shit to do,
the most creative people I know,
they're like, no, they tend to their inner world
in different ways, but they tend to that.
Super practical, very clear.
I'm gonna go back to Jon Kabat-Zinn real quick,
who you introduced me to, who you've
included me in a very special three day retreats that you and he and his son Will have put
on, which has been, they're game changers for me and my wife, Lisa.
But in passing, John had said, like, how's your meditation going?
Like, how's your practice going?
Something like that.
And I said, ah, and he goes, yeah, I understand.
He goes, you know what I'm doing right now?
I'm just doing meditation in bed before I get out of bed.
He goes, I'm already really relaxed.
He goes-
This is from the guy who would say,
every day get your ass on the cushion.
That's right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for years, decades.
Right, so has he shared the same, like, he's like-
He don't know how much he shares it with, but yeah, he does meditation flying down after 50 years.
Yeah.
He's 80 now, so yeah.
To me, this is great.
I'm already kind of in a glow.
I haven't checked my phone.
I haven't tuned into like even the energy of my home.
And I'm already in a pretty relaxed, call it a theta brainwave state.
Like I'm in a pretty chill zone
and I just go to gratitude as my main practice
during that deeply relaxed state.
And a person listening might be,
don't you fall back asleep?
No, like I'm actively going through.
Like I'm grateful for my eyes,
I'm grateful for my non-toothache.
I'm grateful, like it's just,
and that has been my game for probably the last two years. And I'm not sitting on non-toothache. I'm grateful. Like it's just, it, and that has been my game for probably the
last two years.
Wow.
And I'm not sitting on a pillow for 20 minutes, but there's a
found your own expression.
There's a place for that.
And when you and I would do the three days or whatever days
meditations that we're doing together, it's so funny to me
because I think I've said it to the group each time, like, man,
are my, am I the only one with hips that are this tight
that can't sit for more than like 45 minutes?
Are you kidding me?
And so there's all of that kind of noisy critique stuff,
which is so great to get through.
There's a place for it.
And there's also, I've found a real place
for just lying down, being connected
before I tune into the external world,
just tune to the internal.
So that's been a game changer.
He gave me permission to do it.
I don't know why I need a permission,
but he gave me permission to do it in bed
before I get going.
I was like, thank you, that's great.
I don't have to get up and get on a pillow.
That's a great lesson in learning to find your own jam.
And I think that's the beauty.
It's not the form, it's the formless.
Are you tapping into the formless?
That's right.
Because the form is like, it doesn't quite matter what the form is. And we can have holy wars over the form, it's the formless. Are you tapping into the formless? That's right. Because the form is like,
it doesn't quite matter what the form is.
And we can have holy wars over the form.
You should pray, you should meditate, you should do this.
What I will say though is when there is a form,
let's call it my posture for a minute,
and I have tight hips, and when I'm in that form
and my hips start to get fatigued and tired
and achy or shaky, it does give me a different thing
to bounce off of.
Yeah, I find that one of the things I love
about these days is people are doing cold plunges
or people are realizing, do the hard thing,
which I think is so amazing because when you meditate
or you do the cold plunge, you can kind of realize sometimes
that the external can be really painful
and the internal can stay calm,
even though the external is really intense. And sometimes the internal can stay calm, even though the external is like really intense.
And sometimes the internal can be really painful.
And sometimes the internal, but there's a potential.
And again, it's a balance because sometimes,
like I had one time I was sitting in this monastery
and way in Thailand when I was younger,
and there's like cement floors and these hard cushions
and it had this pain, I'm like, just sit with it.
And we're like, you know, it's like the Navy green beret have this pain. I'm like, just sit with it.
And we're like, it's like the Navy green beret
kind of like meditation places where you do not move.
Like, and I'm like, I'm gonna sit with it.
Because you get whacked.
You don't get whacked.
It's just, we were all like had this like bravado
of like younger men who can sit the longest kind of thing.
Fucking pain came through my leg
and I was injured for a month.
Yeah, I had nerve pain because I didn't move.
And I'm like, wow, I really wished I had moved
because my body had me feel it
and it stuck with me for a while.
So I'm definitely of the nature that like there's a benefit to doing all the hard things.
And then there's also benefit to realizing like what is the right form for me?
I love it. Last two questions.
If you could sit with a true master, master of craft, master of self, whatever, like a true master.
And you've sat with many.
Who would that person be?
Where would you sit with them?
And if you only had one question, what is it?
Here we go, Reductionist101.
There's so many different ways to answer that.
I can tell you what my curiosity now is.
My curiosity now is, can I relate to every person I meet as that master wherever we meet them and
That could be a waiter waitress at a restaurant that could be sitting with you
That could be an uber driver. I had this great experience as going to New York City for my son's graduation recently and
We almost hugged afterwards. It's like conversation this uber driver came from Syria and talked about his early childhood and kind of the
Hurt that he'd experienced and the love for his son who was 10 and how much he cares for his son
And I was talking about my son and he was such a profound teacher for me and like I just I went to my son
He's like wow how lucky you are to see your son. Isn't that amazing you've come here?
When I saw my son, I was just in this glow
because of this cab driver.
And so he, you know, that's where I'm at now
is that I want that to be the question everybody has.
And the question I like to ask people is,
where are you most alive?
What's alive for you right now?
And I find that almost everybody has something
that's just alive.
Now you can say,
is that universal consciousness coming through them?
Is that just their own personality?
I don't know, but that's amazing.
Where is it for you?
Where are you most alive?
It's a really good question.
So I'm gonna ask myself in this moment.
So in this moment, when I'm most alive for now is,
I really appreciated our friendship over the years.
And I have a little bit regret that I didn't foster it more.
And but also a little bit of an excitement of like,
wow, I've gotten to know Mike and how,
what a pleasure it is to have other humans
that we have resonance with.
It's not like we have the exact same form or path,
but the heart of it is there.
And I just really appreciate you.
Thank you, brother.
Appreciate my opportunity to be with you.
That is awesome.
I feel it.
And I know that from our friendship.
Yeah, so I love that the world has you in it.
Okay, brother, I appreciate you.
Congrats on bringing something to us that is,
not only, I wanna say something pithy,
but like it's a really good use of somebody's time
to read your writings.
And so thank you for that.
And thank you for everything that you've done for me.
I mean that with like, there should just be a period at the end of that.
Thank you for everything you've done for me.
Appreciate it.
Thank you, Michael.
If you enjoyed that conversation, then please make sure you join us again next time on Finding
Mastery as Dr. Mike sits down with author, poet and meditation expert, Young Pueblo,
whose work on healing, self-awareness
and connection has touched millions.
In this conversation, he and Dr. Gervais explore
what it really means to love better,
starting with the relationship you have with yourself.
Join us on Wednesday, July 16th for this beautiful conversation.
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The door here at Finding Mastery is always open
to those looking to explore the edges
and the reaches of their potential
so that they can help others do the same.
So join our community,
share your favorite episode with a friend,
and let us know how we can continue to show up for you.
Lastly, as a quick reminder,
information in this podcast
and from any material on the Finding Mastery website
and social channels is for information purposes only. If you're looking for meaningful support, which we all need,
one of the best things you can do is to talk to a licensed professional.
Seek assistance from your health care providers. Again, a sincere thank you for listening.
Until next episode, be well, think well, and keep exploring.