Fine Dining - Fazoli's: Fast Food Italian, Wayne Gretzky, and a Roving Breadstick Bus

Episode Date: June 10, 2026

🍝🥖 Fazoli's: Admitting they Can't Compete with Pizza, the "Breadstick Express," and Dr. Lee Zagna 🥖🍝 This week, Sabrina Carmichael (@brina711) joins me to explore the history of Fazoli's, a restaurant that looked at the pizza wars and wisely decided, "No thanks." Instead of trying to battle the delivery giants head-on, Fazoli's carved out a niche with pasta, breadsticks, and a surprisingly unique place in the fast food landscape. Along the way, we uncover one of the strangest restaurant name changes ever and even though my guest "grew up loving Fazoli's," she'd never actually been..??? 🍝 Originally "Gratzi's" (But the Public Confused it with Wayne Gretzky) 🍕 The Self-Realization that they Can't Compete with the Pizza Giants 🥖 The Legendary Breadstick Express (My New Actual Dream Car) 🩺 Dr. Lee Zagna in Fazoli's Marketing 📈 How Fazoli's Found Success as Fast Food Italian 🍽️ Customers Compare It More to Olive Garden Than McDonald's 🔥 The Heat Lamp: Sabrina's Got Buffet Strategy 💄 Yelp from Strangers: A Customer Gets Called "Old" and Takes Shots at the Cashier's Makeup 💬 COMMENT BELOW: What's your stance on salad at a buffet? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🎉 Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw 🔗 All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast 🎤 Guest: Sabrina Carmichael | IG: @brina711 Patreon Producers:Sue Ornelas, Joyce Van, & Robert McLaughlin Patreon Subscribers:David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, Travis Langley, & Jewell Hermann Free Patreon Followers:Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Renae Michael, Crystal C., & NiZ 👉 NEXT WEEK: We eat our Fazoli's to put it to the Chili's Test. 🍝🏆

Is Fizzolis still in business because they simply don't have direct competition? The idea of drive-through lasagna seems antithetical to both fast food and being able to call yourself a real pizan. That's Italian. But Fizzolis married these two things together faster than Michael Corleone and Apollonia and the Godfather Part 1. And your meal at Fizzolis will only end as explosively as that if you're lactose intolerant. Realizing that they couldn't compete with the pizza giants of Domino's, Little Caesars, Pizza Hut, and Papa John's Lew. Fazzoli smartly carved out

its own niche as fast food Italian that focuses on pasta. It's like me realizing I'll never be the doughboys, so I talk about restaurants instead of crim. But just like me, Fizolis is hanging in there at almost 200 locations, and while they may not be as big as their peak,

they're still attempting stunts to get noticed. From a breadstick truck for a kid's charity to a goofily named fictional doctor's spokesperson, Vizolees wants you to know that they're around in 2026, and damn it, they're better than Olive Garden. This week on the show, I'll dunk my breadstick of knowledge directly into your marinera ramekin of curiosity so that you two may know everything I've learned about Fizzoles. Then we'll direct our attention to the people of Yelp to see what they're saying about the

very Fizzolis we dined at. This is the fine dining podcast. Okay, because I think the question we really need to ask ourselves at the beginning and end of the day is do we need fast food Italian? I think it is preposterous. I mean, it sort of is. When I think of something being handed to me through a drive-through window, that food is never spaghetti.

That's it. If I think of, oh, I want lasagna quickly, I'm pretty sure I have one in my freezer. It's crazy. It's crazy. Hello, and welcome to the fine dining podcast, the quest to compare all restaurants to chilies. I'm your host Michael Ornellis, and this is the podcast where we dive deep into the history of your favorite restaurants and then thoroughly review them one week later by comparing them to Chili's. This week, we're covering the only fast food pasta chain I've ever heard of, Fizzolese, and joining me is a former improv teammate of mine, a talented actress, a friend, and she has the same aura as hair blowing in the wind in slow motion.

It's Sabrina Carmichael. Oh, what an intro. Yeah. I almost want to leave right now. I don't know if I can top that. The expectations are so hot. But if you leave, do it in slow motion. Oh, of course I would. That's how I leave everywhere. How's it going? It's going so good. You dedicated so much of your day to this podcast for me. I'm very grateful. But for reference, we did drive just to a different part of California. Was it because it felt like a different state? I'm not going to like. We drove very far to eat fast food Italian. See, and that is the kind of dedication I have to this friendship. And I just want you to remember that.

forever and ever. Well, it is also the dedication you seem to have for Fizzolis. So I want to ask because, oh my gosh, I sent you like a few options of like, would you want to do this place, this place? And you were like, there's a Fazzolis in California? Because I didn't even know Fizzoli still existed. So what's your history with it? Okay. So it's not much compared to my reaction, but I'm going to tell you because I grew up in the Midwest, right? By the way, I'm going to scream if your reaction is just, I drove by it a lot and was always curious. No, in fact, quite the opposite. Okay. Because where I live is called Huntington, Indiana. It's a very small town. And it's essentially a suburb of a city called Fort Wayne that people might actually know. But to us, going to Fort Wayne was like

how we would feel about going to Europe. It was like Fort Wayne. We're going to make a trek into Fort Wayne. I don't know why it felt like such an epic journey. I do remember after college backpacked through Fort Wayne to find myself. Yeah, as most people do. You stayed in the Fort Wayne hostels. You saw the great museums. Yeah. Yeah, it's a common tourist destination for young people. But at the time, to us, it was such a, it was such a huge deal. So any restaurant, including Fazzollos, which we had many, like, if it was in court way. Exactly. Yeah, I think I, I tried to say that with my, the tone of my voice had quotations in it. I'm pretty sure. Yeah. But there were also, there were the fun commercials when I was a kid and it would be like, Fizzolese is like, what a fun place to be. It might as well be

Discovery Zone or Chunky Cheese. It looked so exciting. I think when I, when you mentioned it, I was like, I've been, oh, Fizzolese, what a huge part of my childhood. I think dreaming of Fizzolese was a huge part of my childhood. And when we walked in, I actually realized I'm not even sure if I've ever been there. I think maybe once. But I don't know if I remember it properly. I am a guest. I also feel a guest. That's, can I trust my memory? Am I insane? Have I been hijacked by an alien? I don't know. But I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I so sure. That's so funny to me. I know. Yeah, my history with this place was non-existent. I didn't know it existed until doing this podcast and just looking at different categories of fast foods and restaurants. You grew up with basically no dreams, I guess. Correct. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I understand. Yeah, yeah. I still have none. No aspirations. Because I lack to Fizzolis or even the commercials of Fizzolis. Well, that's our histories with Fizzolis. Do you want to hear the history of the history of Fizzoles. So love to.

All right. We're going to jump into this week's Eat Deets. Eatery details. Jerry Co. The Lexington-based parent company of Long John Silver's opened their original Italian fast food restaurant in 1988 under the name Gratzis. In 1989, it became Fizzolies after consumer research found people confused Gratzies with hockey star Wayne Gratzies. Gretzky and Jerry Co openly said the new name was basically made up. So they were groteses for one year.

And people were like, hold on. I thought this would be a hockey restaurant. But he's Canadian. Yeah, that's the confusing part about Fizzoli. They were like, that can't be a Canadian place. That's weird. They don't serve elk. Yeah.

That's hilarious. Yeah. They thought it was affiliated with Wayne Gretzky. And then Jerry Coe, who started as Jerry's restaurant immediately was like, Long John Silver's has promised. Totally. They sold all of their Jerry's restaurants, went all in on Long John Silver's. And then eventually we're like, let's do Italian and did Fizzoli's. I want to push back on the life choices of basing major business decisions on betting on Long John Silver's.

Yeah. I think that needs to be stricken from the public consciousness because gross. And then I say that out loud and I think, hey, Long John Silver is still here, isn't it? Like, it shouldn't be, but it is. It's still here in the way that gum you eat stays in you for seven years. Or just stuck on your shoe no matter what you do. It really won't go away and I can't figure out who eats there.

I mean, I ate there once and it was. You're part of the problem. Look at that. 2.03, not good. I'm honestly surprised that's that high. It was. Listen, Long Don Silver's is so bad we had one in my town. You didn't even have to drive to Fort Wayne. Then you were like, no, thank you.

No, thank you. Of course not. Yeah. In 1990, former Jerry Co-executive Cooney Toyota teamed with Duskin Limited, a Japanese Long John Silver's franchisee to buy the five original Fazoli stores for $3 million through Seed Restaurant Group. Cooney became the growth architect, while Carol Toyota was later credited by the brand for building the accounting, administration, training, and corporate support backbone that let the chain scale. So there was some real Japanese.

I used to work in the auto industry. Yeah. And there was a lot of talk of like Japanese efficiency method. I think this one called like Kaizan or something like I'm not going to get blasted. I don't think. I don't know if that's the right word. But there's something of like the way that they can pump out things in a very specific way. I feel like that has to have something to do with the success of Fazollies at this point.

Well, especially because Italian food, not that it's, this is literally talking about the behind the scene stuff. So it is different. Sure. But when I think of Italian food, I think of like sauce that's been simmering all day. And they're like, how do we get that out of a window in 90 seconds? Exactly. Exactly. So this is like the administrative equivalent of that.

Right. There has to be. It's like, imagine ever thinking to ask yourself the question, how can I make Italian food more efficient? It is a really weird question that. You think of a nona in the kitchen all day. Yeah. And you're like, hurry up. We need it now.

It's kind of horrifying. Yeah. She has a hunchback. And she's like, I'm old. I'm going as fast as I can. She's crying. Yeah. I mean, this is terrible.

Yeah. But still open. smoking a cigarette over the sauce. Because that's part of the seasoning. Of course. Yeah. Of course. Got to get some ash.

Yeah. Some ash. But I really thought you were going to say ass for a second. Yeah. Hey, I don't judge. Look. Get your ass where you can get it. Get your ass where you can get it.

That should be a shirt. Okay. Get your ass where you can get it. Yeah. I also found it interesting that like they were a Long John Silver's franchisee. So they were like, we're in the business of LJS. And LJS. I'm the Church of Ladder J Saints.

I forget how familiar you are with LJS. Yeah, yeah, you guys are tight. Go on. And they bought all of the existing facility. They basically took the ownership away. Right. And at that point was only five locations. Right.

When Toyota took over, Fizzoli sold a fairly even mix of pizza and pasta, but he decided chasing the established pizza giants without delivery was pointless and instead doubled down on pasta, upgraded ingredients. pushed firmer al dente preparation and built the guest experience around hot breadsticks. Historically, the concept sold itself as a cheaper, quicker alternative to casual Italian, with unlimited breadsticks and refills for dine-in guests and price points that once put an individual meal under $4 and a family of $4 under $15. Oh, remember those days where food was affordable? I don't.

It feels like so long ago. It's a distant memory, but I think it existed. I remember going to fast food restaurants. and my total being three digits with the sense, you know? Right, right. 764 and I just got a combo meal. I dream, I dream. But I also love that I think you can't fail if you're like, we're making an American restaurant of any kind.

And what we're going to do, our strategy is free carbs. Yeah. Unlimited carbs. We're going to fill you up with carbs before we give you the entree carbs that you've ordered. That's no fail. Do you think an experience where the basic strategy is carbs on carbs, on carbs as much as you can eat. Would that succeed anywhere outside of the U.S., in your opinion?

It shouldn't. It might. Like, Americanization, like, we have a very gluttonous food culture in America. That is just factual. It's getting glorified worldwide in a way that is troubling. Like, Dubai has so many of our chains now. Really? And I'm like, you're just going to get a bunch of like really American.

can build people over there, to put it politely. America. We are a great influence. And then like cheese is starting to make its way into like Korean food. You would hate that. When I would. But like historically there's been like a lot of Asian cultures don't do a lot of lactose. And it makes me sad because I'm like, those are like a safe haven for me to be like, oh, I can go get Japanese food or Chinese food or Korean food and not worry.

And now it's just like I went to a Korean barbecue and they just put like a ramekin of like a melty cheese on the grill. And it's just like a caution zone that I'm trying to avoid while cooking meat. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Oh. So. Fizzoli's opened its first out of Kentucky store in Orlando in 1991, reached its 50th restaurant in 1994 and hit 100 units in 1995, ending that year with 164 restaurants. By December 2000, it had opened a restaurant in the Philippines.

And by late 2002, McDonald's said Fizzoli's operated more than 400 restaurants in 32 states, big enough that McDonald's itself entered a joint venture to develop 20 to 30 more units and secured an option to buy the entire company. Oh, my gosh. First of all, I don't think it's an accident that Fizzoli's 100th location coincided with my 10th birthday. We were obviously meant to be in each other's lives. Yes. It's just math. By you seeing their commercials and apparently not going. Apparently.

I need to call a family member figure this out. But also, I think the leap, I love that the leap was from Kentucky to Florida. Like, what a no-brainer leap? That's it. They're like, where else would this do well? Florida and like Scottsdale, Arizona are like the chain restaurant mecca's in the U.S. Is that true? I wonder why.

Any thought on that? Is that just where people just don't want to cook? Florida going to Florida. Yeah. That's just that. Yeah. The Scottsdale connection, I don't really. know. Interesting. Yeah. You should investigate that. I'm just saying. Get the answers that people need. Generally, I do think a road trip to Scottsdale specifically to just go ham on chain restaurants would be fun. It might be the death of me. It might be my demise. I mean, worth it. Is it? Go out with a literal bang, you know. Yeah. By pop. A pop. Go out with a pop. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Sun Capital bought Fizzolies in 2006 when the brand had 319 units, but the chain then lost.

about a third of its footprint as it drifted toward dollar menu fast food and even pulled back on the breadsticks. CEO Carl Howard helped stabilize it by moving the chain back towards fast casual style of food, service, and experience. Sentinel bought the brand in 2015 and Fat Brands acquired it in 2021 for $130 million. So much to unpack here. First of all, you're going to pull back on the breadsticks. Crazy. What insane business is it. Crazy.

Like you think these people running things. know what they're doing and then you hear something like that and you lose all faith in capitalism in general. It's just how can we, you know, the reputation is breadsticks and we want to show people that they're more than that. So we're going to take it away from like. No, no, no, no. What are you? Yeah. It just reminds me I should be president of everything. Breadsticks everywhere. Come on, guys. Get it together. Get it together. Yeah. Um, wait, there was something else. Acquired by fat brands. Thank you. You knew. I saw a look on your face. So the moment I said fat brands. Okay, that's got to be.

Fat Burger. Oh, okay. The parent company of Fat Burger. So. I love that we hear the word fat attached to something with food and we're like, I want that. Yeah. And I'm not even being sarcastic. Yeah.

What a fun part of the human experience. Like it's one of those things where you're like, I know I'm going to pay for it, but I know it's going to be tasty. Yes. Yeah. It's just like that that's the indulgence we need in our lives. Yeah. Look, the world. Look, the world is a hard place.

Sometimes you need fat. You need food full of fat. Yeah. And carbs. And you need them to be unlimited. And I think we're back where we started. Yeah. I'm just trying to heal America.

You should be the president of everything. I know. I keep saying that. You've said it once here. Isn't that enough? And it's, no, it will not be the first time. You will say it again. You'll drop it again.

I know. I'm just trusting your audience to do whatever needs done. I don't know how it works exactly. But people at home, please mobilize. If we could get me in office immediately. You'll be so well fed. I promise everyone free unlimited breadsticks. And I will never go back on that promise.

Fizzoli's most memorable marketing pushes were value and breadstick-centric stunts, such as the 2012 breadstick tour, which supported the Feed the Children charity by introducing the Breadstick Express, a customized food truck with on-board ovens capable of baking hundreds of their garlic breadsticks at a time. In 2018, the Infinite Pasta Pass sold eight weeks of All You Can Eat pasta for 50 bucks, and newer campaigns have leaned into National Breadstick Day, and the oddball of the ad ball of food. Dr. Lysanya character. In other words, the brand's big creative swings were mostly about making cheap pasta and garlic bread feel like an event. Okay, what is this doctor treating? I think it's just, I have authority. I did 10 years of school.

To tell us to eat more lasagna? Basically, basically. I'm Dr. Lizania and Fizzolese has this deal going on. And, you know, it's one of those. I love him. I watched one commercial of Dr. Lee Zanya. Yes.

And it was just like constant motion. It was like, it was like one of those like walk with me like kind of like Aaron Sorkin. Yeah. It was just like a very movement heavy commercial. And it was making me like, I don't want to move that much after eating your food. I'm picturing like the six flags guy for some reason. Like Dr. Lizaia sounds really spastic to me.

This is kind of like a hot dock. Oh. Oh. Yeah. They went with like a good looking handsome, you know, mid 40s salt and pepper bearded. It's good marketing. This is why they're winning. Are they winning?

I think so. There's one in California. Okay, that's true. I don't know if that's true. But you know how many they're in the Midwest? You don't give the Midwest enough. And I say that as someone who doesn't necessarily recommend it. But I think you're missing out on a lot of things that you enjoy.

Hey, my highest ranked fast food chain is out of the Midwest. Which one? Portillo's. Okay, I've never been to Portillo's. I'm not even a good Midwestern. But you remember the commercials. But I remember the commercials and I felt like I went this one time. But we didn't ever drive it.

No. I also love how you mean. me look like a it's okay to swear in here right or is it not okay you made me look like a real asshole because you were like the breadstick tour or whatever and I'm like what a dumb thing and then you're like to feed the children and I'm like I literally felt you're like your like your vibe check yeah no that I'm so glad they did that I meant that's what I met by that laugh oh yay check is that the right term I felt your like shift in energy of like you were laughing and you're like I felt like you set me up for it it's like you laughed in church you were like oh I guess you like starving

children. Oh, everybody, did you notice? Oh, what a stupid thing. Oh, for a good con. Oh, I guess that sounds great, actually. Yeah. Let me talk to the doctor about it. But the idea of like a bread. The Breadstick Express, if there is one vehicle that I could rent and drive around. It wouldn't be the Wienerville. It wouldn't be the Wienerville. It wouldn't be like a nice sports car. Sure. I think it would be something that says the Breadstick Express. One, because that guy sounds like he fucks. The Breadstick Express. Are you kidding me? He pulls. But also just...

He's dipping it everywhere. He's got the whole place. They got so many sauces for him. Yeah. But like also just the breadstick express. The smell in there, warm baking garlic bread is like a top three smell for me. It's like that fresh linen and like cookies fresh out the oven. Okay.

Not the cookies we had today. Not that. Well, those were not out of an oven. anytime recently. I mean, at some point, I assume someone baked them. But then they were placed in plastic and their soul removed. Oh, poor cookies. In 2015, Fizzolese issued a survey to customers asking, if not us, then where?

And found the customers had shifted from McDonald's to Olive Garden in Panera, which suggests consumers were finally seeing it as something better than bargain bin fast food. But the novelty never fully disappeared. Dallas Morning News still framed Fizolees as, unusually singular because it lets you buy salad, lasagna, and cheesecake through a drive-thru. But basically the idea that customers see it in a tier with Panera and Olive Garden over McDonald's, that's not a bad sign. I agree with that. Do you? I mean, I feel like it was definitely a step above fast food.

The food on our plate was above what I expect from a McDonald's. But if you take the food out of everything we did today, we walked in, we were given a plastic tray, we went and sat in like a booth table that. But they brought the food. But like, yes, they did hand the food to us at the table, not at the counter. But everything else, like the interior was more akin to the interior of that Long John Silver's I went to than a recreation of Tuscany that they go for in an Olive Garden. That's true. That's true. The ambiance was a little not so high end.

But even at Panera bread or somewhere like that, which, you know, kind of RAP Panera at this point. But you get the buzzer. You still have to go up and get it yourself. I was fully not expecting to be served, which I basically felt like I was in a Michelin Star restaurant at that point. Your life might be sad if this felt like a Michelin experience for you. Is it not exactly like that? No. Okay.

Well, I'll take your word for it. Oh, no. Oh, no. You hate telling someone that, like, hey, oh my gosh, your reality should be better. No, I've been to really nice places. I've been to Jersey Mikes. Okay. So you have eaten Michelin.

I have eaten Michelin. You have eaten Michelin. I'm a foodie. Thank you. Yeah. And that'll do it for this week's Eat Deats. Oh. Sabrina, yes.

We both know that with the opinions you hold, your cancellation is imminent. Yes. Well, I'm here to help expedite the process with my next segment, the Heat Lamp. Oh, Sabrina. My heat lamp. Heat last take hot sticks. So hot right now. Oh.

Sabrina, the heat is on. What is your restaurant hot take? You want to know my restaurant hot take? Yeah. I'm going to tell you right now. If you go to a buffet without a buffet strategy, you are wasting your time, you're wasting everyone else's time, you're wasting America's time. Get out of there.

Get it together before you come back. That's my hot take. You mean like you need to have an approach of what you want to build on your plate? Don't go. How many plates? It's every aspect of it. Listen, if you're in a buffet line and you're just putting random stuff on your plate, first of all, don't go in there and fill up on bread. This isn't Fazzolis.

This is an olive garden. What are you doing? Yeah. You take a lap. You find out what's great here, right? Uh-huh. You're figuring out what's high end. What do I need to try one by a lot?

What are they running out of quickly? Yes. Is there a guy cutting meat off of a thing? I'm not a meat eater. I don't know the terms, but that always looks impressive. A carver. A carving station of some kind. Are there high-end ingredients that I need to check out? You're not going to sit, first of all, don't, you're not, this isn't course one at some sit-down restaurant.

You're not getting a salad. I don't want to see you putting together a salad. I think a salad is the biggest waste at a buffet. You can have it at a certain point. And it is if you have eaten too many fatty things in a row and you need to clear space for the next round. That's crazy. Adding more food does not clear space. Roughage has its place.

You don't make a big salad. You don't fill it up with protein. I don't want to see chickpeas on that salad. Look, fiber doesn't make you shit immediately. I don't think you're eating fiber right. I have a very efficient digestive. Okay. It helps.

It's also the fact that just sometimes your stomach just needs something different to tell it like, it's okay. We're okay. Yeah. There's some lettuce, buddy. Hey, hey, hey, calm down. Yes. Yeah. It's all good.

Yeah. But here's the other thing. You do, you have to do that lap first because you have to make, you have the strategy but starts with making a specific strategy. Okay. This is multi-layer. So what is the, what are the steps? Okay.

So step one, you pay, you enter, you find your seat. You get a drink, nothing too filling. Yeah. Don't get a milkshake. Also, honestly, drinking these things is kind of a new move. It's not, it's kind of, it's not. If you're drinking alcohol, you're filling up on stuff that isn't delicious. Let's just be honest.

That's so funny to me. It's not great. When I see people drinking like the unlimited beer or something, I'm like, you are so dumb. You're falling for it. I literally just had a guess say you should not drink anything until a meal is over. Okay. That's a little crazy. Okay.

Thank you. Because I've never heard anyone say that. And then now you're like, don't you mean don't do like carbid drinks. Like the stuff that's carbonated that fills you up, look, if you have to have a soda, I'm not judging you. I'm never judging your choices. I'm just saying you're filling up space in your stomach that could go to like sushi or like the best pasta you've ever seen.

It's never the best possible. No, it's not. And look, you have to adapt this. If you're going to a cheap buffet, there's a strategy there. If you're going to an expensive buffet, there's a strategy there. If you say so, live a little. I think a cheap buffet is just like, why bother? I think a good buffet is excellent.

Okay. I'm not going to argue with you because you're not wrong. And still, I'm going to a cheap buffet probably. Like a cheap buffet is like, hey, do you want a bad version of all the foods? It was just like, don't you want food poisoning every once in a while? Like, just like, you know, restart. Yeah. Everyone has roughage that quickly clear them out.

Some people need a cheap buffet. Sometimes you just need to clear it all out, start fresh. You know, I get that. But also, like, I'm kind of an undecided person. So it's really hard for me. When I sit down at a restaurant and I have to order one meal, it's like it's torture, essentially. So I like to go somewhere where I can have a little bit. And here's the other thing.

At any buffet, I don't care how much it costs. If you want to try something, you might feel like you have to put a whole serving on your plate. You don't. You can put one bite on it. No. And that is what I have learned at buffets. portion portion portion that's it you can always go back for more my friend yeah but you're gonna start to psychologically feel guilty if you're leaving a bunch of stuff on your plates and you're

going to be like maybe I'm not hungry anymore you're still hungry right chill out yeah it's okay I'm the opposite in terms of like indecisiveness I go to a restaurant knowing what I'm gonna order already because that's the thing drawing me there I'm like oh I want to go to outback for the bloom and onion and their burger okay I like I don't need to look at the menu I know what I'm getting and like sure if I went to Outback like yesterday and then two days from now someone's like hey do you want to go to Outback I'm probably not going to order the same thing and that's when I'm like let's explore deeper into the menu but if I'm only going once every few months yeah you know what you want because it's not a craving for that place it's a craving for that thing at that place

for me you're making a plan to go out to eat because you want something yes whereas I find myself going out to eat in a social situation often. And then I have to choose what to eat. And that happens a lot with restaurants I'm unfamiliar with because I'll go, like, I'll be with a group of friends that are like, hey, let's go eat after this. I don't have a say over where it is or they've already decided or whatever. And then we end up somewhere and, yeah, then I have to browse a menu and figure out what I want. Do you get panicked in those situations? No, not really. Me either. That'd be weird. That'd be really emotionally unstable of me. Are you crying? Are you crying? Are you crying? Is that it fine? Like both eyes have a tear. I got a break, so I can call my therapist really quick.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it is hard. And I don't even eat meat. So you would think I would have limited options. But everything looks, I love food. I love not having to cook food. I love not having to clean out my own food. I'm so excited to be there.

And then I have to pick one. The dessert station at buffets also insane options. Have you been to the Win buffet? No. Okay, endorsement. Win buffet. Am I allowed to endorse the place? That isn't Fazoles because that's my other favorite restaurant, obviously.

but they have because they have a dessert station that looks like Willy Wonka. I mean, it's so unbelievable. And I don't even have a sweet tooth, but they give it in these little portions, which is just what you need. It's like, do you want a bite of this type of cheesecake? I can't tell you where because I don't remember, but I know in Vegas, I went to a buffet. And their dessert station was like they had probably 20 different things. They had one of each. And like they'll replenish, I imagine.

But you don't know. But you don't know. You could be eating the one that day. And so it's one of those things where like you then get that crazy feeling of like, well, I have to take it now because it'll be gone if I come back. Yes. And then before you know it, they're like, sir, you can't have all the desserts. That's called scarcity marketing. Yeah.

And it's very, very effective. It's so effective. Okay. But then see, speaking of Vegas buffets, two hot tips. If you eat crab legs, I have learned that eating a course of crab legs between every other course. Somehow it's like eating sorbet before the next thing. It primes you. You're like, it's such tiny.

It's so much work for tiny little bits of food. And then you're like, yeah, I could eat a whole pizza right now after that. So I highly recommend trying that. Yes. Yeah, very good. And then if you, you know, partake in very legal gummies that make you hungry and make food taste really good, check it out once. It's an experience. You might be there five or six hours.

I would guess from not ever. having done that myself. Well, thank you for swimming in a pool of controversy. You navigated it well. Vote for me for president. Of everything. It is now time to turn our attention to other people and hear what they thought about the Fasolis that we ate at in this week's Yelp

from strangers. We need a little yelp, a little yelp, a little yelp, a little yelp from strangers. One star, two star, three star, four or five, I. So get a little yelp. A little Yelp. That's why you literally want.

This is Yelp from Strangers, our segment where we turn to Yelp and read out our favorite. One, two, three, four, and five star Yelp reviews. Improv. Of the very Fizzolies that we went to, do you mind if I start with the first one? I would love that. Three star review. This is a three star review from Christiana S from Mount Vernon, San Bernardino, California. June 19th, 2019.

I would give it more stars, but the customer service sucks here. A girl named Olivia T. Took our order and wasn't paying any attention to what I was saying and ignoring me and my boyfriend bought a beer and she didn't check his ID and simply said he looks old. Anyways. Okay, first of all, holy run on sentence. Okay, this is too. She's naming and shaming.

Naming and shaming. And who comes on Yelp to write a three-star? review. Don't we all go on the road to write five or one? She's like middle. I want everyone to know it's okay. Absolutely. A true sentiment. I saw recently very crazy. Someone whose Yelp history was they have only ever written one review was a three star review. Someone signed up for Yelp to write a middle of the road review. To be like it's fine. Yeah. Very funny. Anyways, yes. This person really wanted to put Olivia T on blast but didn't want to drag the whole restaurant. Okay. I mean, look, fair enough. I have some respect for that, honestly, to be like, look, it's just Olivia. That's the problem. I will say, I don't trust one in five-star reviews because those people are living in their emotions. That's true. So. And those are the only kind of reviews aren't leave. Yeah. Oh, is that true? I live in my emotions full time. That's fair. Anyways, he looks old anyways. That is so rude and disrespectful. Not to mention if you're not checking ID, you're basically giving out alcohol illegally. She's trying to get Olivia arrested.

She's trying to get her arrested. Also, every instance of your is spelled Y-O-U-R regardless of function. Perfect. Of course it is. Yeah. So I would work more on your staff for a better ratings. Olivia T. in all caps. Of course.

Can only wear so much makeup on her face to disguise how ugly her personality is. Oh my God. It's not cute at the register. Okay, real housewives of middling Russians. Of Norco. Calm down. Second of all, you just said one and five-star people are in their emotions. But I'm hearing a lot of caps.

this three-star review. All caps. That's an emotional move. Yes. I'm not saying this person is not emotional. I'm just saying they really love pasta. Which is an emotion. Which is an emotion. That's a place to be. Yeah. There's joy, really love pasta bliss. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Orgasm, I guess, probably. Is that an emotion? I think so. Yeah. Scared. Fear. Yeah. The same. Scared and fear. Anxious. Are you comparing these to orgasms or there's a lot to impact there? I think we'll do off mic. I love everything about that review. Just like you're wearing make, like we're getting so catty. It's, it's so petty. And probably this poor Olivia girl, I mean, probably young, right? Probably. Like, this is horrific, actually. This is bull. But also, is this cyberbullying. He looks old anyways.

That is funny. I think that's a serial. That is funny. Five star review. Okay, so I have here a review from Kevin M. Los Angeles, California. I'm familiar with the area. And this is a five star review. Yeah. This is the kind of start, this is the kind of review I like to write. I'm a big. I like to give people props. Visited this Vizzoli's on Monday 5-6 on the way to the airport. I love that he includes the story of what he's doing with his life. My daughter carried her stuffed animal lambie, aka lamb, lamb, into the restaurant. Kids very on the nose with their naming of their stuffies. Yes. And I love that there's two names included here. Yeah. We needed to know the given birth name. We need to know the legal name. Yeah. What's on the paperwork?

Yes. And then what's like the nickname that. Exactly. So thank goodness we have that information. She's had him since she was born. They have a drive-through, but this was her first time at Fizzoli's. So she wanted to explore it inside, relatable. We went inside, and it was a clean and welcoming environment. So she went exploring with Lami while we placed our order. Lammy's having an adventure.

Lammy is the star of a children's book right now. Lammy's living. Lamey's first Fizzolese is this book. It's happening right now. Lammy's living the life I dreamed of as a child, actually. Literally. We ordered spaghetti with Marin. Nara sauce to go. So not hanging out too long. We got the order quick. Wait, yeah. She wanted to go

inside, but it's still a to go order. She just wanted to see the inside. Yeah. They didn't want to hang out. Yeah. Which we understand. We get it. We got the order quickly and we were out the door. On the way to the airport, she inhaled it. I hope they say where they're flying because he really likes to talk about the airport. Also, spaghetti in the car? Yeah. The terrible parenting decision. Spaghetti in the car? Truly unhinged behavior. This whole thing is nuts. You're giving your child spaghetti. Okay. This guy sounds crazier than the one you just read. Honestly, I'm a little nervous about him. Yeah. But I want you to know that she said it was her favorite spaghetti and she wanted some more. Wow. Doesn't say much about their cooking. We get to the airport, standing in line for security at the airport where they are. When she says, I don't have lambie. Lammy, lambie, lambie. Lammy. Yeah. I asked where he was. She said she left him in the car. What does it have to do with Fizzoli's? Boom. I full sprint to the car. to rescue Lammy. Lammy is not in the car.

I'm, oh my God. Well, we know where Lammy's adventure still is. I just told you how emotional I am and you give this to me to read. Oh my goodness. I said, told her, okay, you must have left him at Fazolli's then. She looks at me. Her eyes filled with water. Then bursts into tears fearing she will never see her beloved lamb lamb again.

Proper name use. High states. Yeah, yeah. I tell her I will call the restaurant once we get through security. Because again, they're at the airport if you forgot. Okay. But wait. This guy's creative writing major.

Her Hello Kitty backpack is pulled to the side by security for additional inspection. This detail is so not needed. I'm nervous. What did my seven-year-old daughter pack? This sounds like a Reddit post that would be on, that happened or whatever. Yeah, yeah. This is too dramatic. She's staring at the backpack giggling.

I'm scared. Am I going to jail? Kevin. No, they reach in and pull out. She accidentally put my gun in her backpack, you know. Oops. I do think that the type of parent who's allowing spaghetti consumption in a car does just have like a loose gun. For sure.

This girl's taking a switchblade to school 100%. No, they reach in and pull out ellipsies, build tension, a fidget spinner. They thoroughly inspect the fidget spinner, then give it back to her. None of this has to do with Fuzzolese. What is a thorough inspection of a fidget spinner? It's been a... You flick it once? I assume they took it apart, put it back together.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tasted it. Put it in their mouth like they do with breast milk. I called Fizzolis and they have Lammy. Oh my gosh. I tell them I'm leaving for vacation, but we'll be back on Saturday. I asked if they would hold on to it. On to it for me until then.

They said they will, exclamation point. On Saturday, after a long trip, what if he described his whole trip here? I feel like I feel like you did and he cut it out. We went back to Fizzolies and she was. who's reunited with her lambie. She was a happy girl. We, of course, ordered a spaghetti with marinera to go,

which I assumed they immediately took to the car to eat and the most intelligent way. We could not eat it in the store. No, no, no. We just wanted to say thank you to everyone there who took care of her lamb lamb. The team there was amazing. And I am really appreciate it.

It would have been devastating to all of us to lose him. That could have been about one third of the length. I think that could have been five sentences. It could have been one sentence, probably. But I also love that. My daughter lost her lamb lamb. I mean, I think it's nice and I think he should have done this review. But I also think it's not really a review of the restaurant, right?

It's a review that they didn't. Yeah. That they returned a toy. What I imagine is they're waiting to board and they're at the terminal. And he's like, well, I have time to write a review. That's it. And he starts writing it. Well, I guess no, because he would only write it at the end if they got Lamlam back.

So this is written after the trip. So that might be wrong. But like he's writing it and he's like, how do I make this more epic? And his and his like partner just goes like, ooh, add the part about the fidget spinner. Right. And it's just like, that's going to keep people hooked until the end. That was insane. Yeah.

People are nuts. Reading Yelp reviews reminds me of how insane everyone is. Yeah. I love that I get to live here. That said, a five star. That wasn't too in its emotions. But it was too. It was in a story.

It was in something. Yeah. It was in the plot. I've never seen an attention-seeking five-star review before, but I love it. Hey there, it's me, Michael. And now that we're in season four, I'm adding more content to my Patreon. Not only can you hear the extended Yelp from Stranger segment with three more reviews, and not only can you get an exclusive full episode covering an extra chain restaurant on the last day of each month,

but I've added an extra chat with my guests where we discussed their go-to fast food and chain restaurants and talk about why they love them so much. I hope you'll come check it out and you can get your first week completely free of charge. That's patreon.com slash fine dining podcast. I appreciate and love you all back to the episode.

And that's part one. Tune in next week as we tell you what we thought about our meal at Fizzoli's. Sabrina, thanks so much for joining me. Thanks for having me. Test time ever. Tell people where they can find you on social. You can find me at at Brina

like as an S-A-M-A-B-R-I-N-A-7-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-11 on Instagram. Is your birthday July 11th or do you just really like 711? My birthday is July 11th. Okay. Yeah.

And do I always go to Vegas on my birthday? Yes, I do. What's? 711's a very lucky number. Oh. It's weird though because I never win. Oh.

But I'm going to try again this year. This will be the year. And you can follow the show on Instagram and TikTok at Fine Dining Podcast. You can join my Discord if you want to come chat with me. I also have a Patreon that supports the show directly. I appreciate any and all. support. You get an exclusive episode every single month on the final day of the month. You get the full

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