Fine Dining - Hooter Bowl 2: "Hootdunnit?" Hoots Wings (Part One: Eat Deets) feat. VyVy Nguyen (Shaky Shivers)

Episode Date: February 7, 2024

The second annual Hooter Bowl! Friend of the show VyVy Nguyen is back to celebrate Hooter Bowl 2 by joining Michael at fast casual Hooters spin-off restaurant, Hoots Wings (basically Hooters without the Hooters Girls) "Fine" Dining is now on video! Head on over to our YouTube to watch this very special film noir parody episode! Michael dares the NFL to bring on their legal team A gift for VyVy mysteriously disappears, shutting down the entire Hooter Bowl and instead launching a Hootdunnit! Dick d'Ocre tries to help Melody narrow down who could've stolen her gift This Hoots Wings location was located inside of a different restaurant Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius XIV is all about high fashion The most-asked Google questions about Hooters from the predictions in the search bar VyVy will not actually give you money for recreating her noises JUB & Petunia are questioned and confess to an totally-not-related crime A guy bases his star rating on what other people think of Hoots in this week's Yelp from Strangers The full review comes next week!   Music by: James McEnelly (@Ramshackle_Music) Theme Song by: Kyle Schieffer (@JazzyJellyfish) Segment Transitions Voiced by: Sandy Rose "Fine" Dining is on Patreon! Get an extra episode every month (January's episode was a countdown of all the restaurants on the Tchotchke of Mediocrity that are outside the 4.00-6.00 Zone of Mediocrity, starting with the least mediocre and working towards center), extended Yelp from Strangers segments every other week, merch discounts, download access to our music including the 7 singles from our Olive Garden musical, and more! Patreon Producers: Sean Spademan, Joyce Van, & Sue Ornelas   Get the 5 Survival Tips for Casual Dining at www.finediningpodcast.com!   Send in your Hoots Wings stories at [e-mail].   Follow the show on TikTok and Instagram @finediningpodcast Follow VyVy on Instagram @cest_la_vyvy Check out VyVy in her horror feature film Shaky Shivers and HBO's upcoming miniseries The Sympathizer.   Let me know where I should go next by leaving us a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, PodcastAddict, Overcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I read every one!   Next week on "Fine" Dining: Hoots Wings by Hooters (Part Two: Review)! VyVy finally gets to open her gift, and sticks around to review Hoots Wings with Michael! Ever work at Hoots Wings? Send your stories to [e-mail].   Totally Not Sponsored by: Harrison Augustine 💸 Arrylius XIV

Hey everyone, I've got some very exciting news before I start this podcast. Starting today and every week from now on, I'll be posting fully produced video versions of these episodes on YouTube. So if you're not subscribed to the Fine Dining Podcast YouTube channel, go over there, do it now. And why not start with this episode, the second annual Hooter Bowl? All right, thanks for listening. Hope you enjoy. Should I look at the wide or my single? I don't know. I should look at the wide. Yeah, you should.

Hello and welcome back to the fine dining podcast, the search for the most mediocre restaurant in America. I'm your host, Michael Ornellis, and this week it is the second annual Hooter Bowl. Oh, I should probably say who you are. Yeah, who am I? So my guest host this week, a repeat, return guest, VVen. Hello. Do you pronounce the N is? your last name slightly?

Yes. I thought it was pronounced like a W and then I called you at one point and your voicemail said the end and I was mortified. Well, okay, so my last name is the most common Vietnamese last name out there. It's the smith of Vietnamese last names and to say it in an American

accent, there's no like proper pronunciation for it. We're incapable of pronounce your minds can't comprehend it. Do you want to try? Yeah, hit me. Okay, it's Muen. Nope, not happening. There you go. So like, to change that into American pronunciation, it's tough. So I say Nguyen, but some people say

when, some people say when. As long as you're not saying like Nguyen, yeah, you're good. Noguyan. Yeah, I don't like that. That's, I mean, that's, yeah. Anyways, don't do that. I won't. Cool. I'm here with VV1. We went to Hoot's Wings. So it is the Hootter Bowl. The big game as, you know what, screw it. You can get sued for saying the Super Bowl, but like, wait, really?

I'm not skit. Well, if you're like selling stuff, but I'm not, like, I'm not a commercial entity. I'm just an entertainment product. I don't know if a lawyer would. Come after me, NFL. I want it. I want the smoke. Come on.

Bring it. But yeah. So last year, uh, the first Hooter Bowl did Hooters proper and discovered that there is another Hooters restaurant, a fast casual version called Hoot's Wings. We went there. We did. And we're going to talk all about it. This is a part one episode, meaning we're going to go into the Eat Deats.

We're going to go into the Yelph and Strangers. But we've got snacks. We do. Lots of snacks. Do you like how I plated just a bowl of Oreos? Yeah. Yeah. And these are just for props.

You are not allowed to eat them. This is the show. where I'm looking for the most mediocre restaurant in America, the perfect 5.0 out of 10, the litmus test against which you can measure all other restaurants to determine if they are objectively good or objectively bad. So our table's not ready yet, but in the meantime, let's learn about the place in just a minute.

Before we go into the theme song. Okay. I got you a gift because we've got snacks, but you don't have the gear. Oh. You don't have, like, people wear their favorite jerseys when it's, you know, I don't have a jersey for you. Oh. But I did get you a gift. Okay.

I got you something to wear. It's less about football and more about snacks because this is a food podcast. Love it. But it is about something very, I don't want to say near and dear to us, but specific. to us. It's something we have in common. Okay. I thought I had a gift bag. There was

a gift bag there earlier. Do we have Can someone bring me the gift bag? Oh. Is it behind there? I don't. I think it's gone. It can't be gone. Well, it's not next to you anymore.

which is where it was, because I remember when I got here, I was like, oh, there's a present. And I got excited. Hold on. Does anyone have it? I'm getting annoyed.

Like, I don't see it. What does it look like? It's a T-shirt. I didn't ask you what the gift was. The size of a T-shirt. Oh, oh, okay. It's in a gift bag. Yeah.

There is a common thing that you and I have a shared disdain for and it is a common part of all Super Bowl snack platters and uh whoa I wanted you to gear up for the Hooter Bowl amidst our snack platters and now we can't so the Hooter Bowl's off I'm canceling the Hooter Bowl what instead we've got a hoot done it Cue the music! Your table is ready. Follow me. Have you tried our chicken and bread?

Serving pancakes and ribs, I recommend the spaghetti. We're here to satisfy not to impress. Your table is ready. Complementary butter and bread. These walls have growth signs. Knit-knack, cowboy hat, good luck at autograph guitar, some crap from your city. Behold the touch key of mediocrity.

Dining. Just fine dining. Fine dining, fine dining Two letters on the sign are shining, neon flickering irregular timing, Identify the perfect fight, Palatine. The rain tapped against my window like a persistent creditor,

demanding attention I didn't have to spare. It was one of those dreary nights that had the city wrapped in its melancholy embrace. My half Texas, half California, but also So part Chicago neon sign flickered like a lit cigarette, casting a sickly glow across my cramped studio. Then she walked in. A dame. Not just any dame, but...

Okay, if you're going to have a cool internal monologue and outfit change, can you include the guest? Yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to, like, exclude you. Sure. Thank you. The raindrops outside mirrored the chaos in my mind. A tempest of worry and guilt. I never imagined I'd be standing in a private eyes podcast space, seeking help for something so trivial, yet so significant.

The couch creaked as I sat myself in front of him in his studio, a room cloaked in shadows and the faint smell of old to-go boxes. His eyes met mine, weathered yet sharp, assessing me in a way that made me feel exposed. I tried to hold my composure, to not let the desperation bleed through, But this man, this detective with a world-worn gaze, seemed to see right through the facade I'd carefully crafted. She didn't have to speak.

The way she held herself, the way her eyes met mine, told a story. A story of trouble, tangled in a web of secrets and danger. Yet there was a vulnerability lurking beneath the surface, a vulnerability that screamed for help without saying a word. Help me, detective. Me? Deoker. Dick Deoker. Pleased to make your acquaintance, Dick. I'm Melody. Melody. Like music to my ears, to what do I owe the pleasure?

I'm afraid something very special was taken from me, and I feel awful, truly awful. It was a gift given to yours truly, and it simply vanished. Vanished, you say? Her lips were asking for help, but her eyes told a different story. What was she keeping from me? Best to play along for now, I need more time with this jigsaw puzzle. Sure, I'll help you. Cash or card?

Well, hang on there, sweetheart. We're getting ahead of ourselves. We need to start at square one. We need to get some first impressions. First impressions. Okay, so I had one of the more noteworthy first impressions at this restaurant specifically than any other one that I've had. You got a text from me. I did. I was on the way to the restaurant and I got a text.

It was all hands free. It was just want to make sure. You're trying to defend your recklessness. I just wanted to make sure that I did not touch my phone. The text was there's a very interesting twist. when you get here. Yeah. Laughing emoji.

Yeah. It was heavily tinted and a very narrow amount of real estate for the building that had the Hoots Wings by Hooters sign above it. But there was like a lectern out front and an umbrella with the Hoots Wings logo, which makes me wonder what it's like during the daytime because we went at night. Yes. and door locked. I'm like sneaking a peek between the crack to see if there's any activity inside this building. And I'm almost like weirdly expecting like a ratatooie situation. Like what other reason do they have to like lock the door other than rats are helping them cook?

As far as I know, not the case. Not saying it's not happening at the suit's wings. That's true. Cannot confirm. but it you can't go in there. It's not a restaurant. Well, I was concerned when you sent this text that the restaurant had full on closed and we just weren't aware of it. Right, right.

And I was on my way there. So I was like, oh, shoot, we drove all this way to find a closed restaurant. It was not that you guys need to know the logistics of L.A. traffic, but it was on the other side of where I live to you. So you were driving further. to go to Hoot's Wings, then you would just to go to where I am. Yeah. And it was going to be like, oh, man, we're going to have to figure out a different place to go to. Yeah.

And there are brick and mortar Hoot's Wings locations that I was unaware of. And I think they're pretty far away. Yeah, they're scattered across Southern California. This one is just a counter inside of a blaze pizza, which just tickled me. Now, I'm going to put blinders on and we're not going to really, we're not going to talk about the blaze of it. And yet it was such a presence. It was such a presence, but like this review isn't of blaze. No. This review is of Hoot's wings. Yet the atmosphere was blaze. Was blaze other than a counter. Yes, a little counter. Yeah. So my first impressions are just like, what the hell?

Yeah. What have we gotten ourselves into? I was worried. I was like, we're not going to be able to do the place. Luckily, there was a counter because there was. was a door to the blaze that had signage indicating, yeah, we sell Hooters stuff here. And I'm like, ah, I've never been so happy to hear that sentence before. We sell Hooters here. Yeah. But it is like, it's a fast casual restaurant still. So it's a little bit of a departure from what I normally do.

But I am, I am starting to get a little bit more comfortable with fast casual. If for no other reason, then it gives me more ground to cover in this. searched this journey for mediocrity that I'm on. And I also want to mention, I'm waiting for you outside. Yes. And the reason that I discovered the correct door to this place, other than that sign that gave a hint, an exasperated Hoot's employee walked out, went and just sat in her car and went nowhere. Oh, no.

I think it was like a 10 minute break. She just like got on her phone, not like a call, but just like was just sitting in her car on her phone. And I was like, oof, I've been there. I've had jobs where my car was my solace on my break. Yeah. And then you arrive. We go in. We get in the line.

And I'm not having it with fast cat. I'm not going to be overwhelmed. I'm not going to be bullied by a fast casual line. Don't allow it. The pressure of the person behind. you wanting to order? No, no. You know what, sir?

Go ahead. Because I'm nowhere to be found. We went up. We grabbed a menu. A paper menu. And we just took it to a table. Yes. We took it to a table, sat down.

We all had pens and were like. We refused to be rushed because there were so many different wings options. And not even wing, like wing flavors or rubs, sauces, preparation style. They had like five different ones. It's not like a. statistics test. It felt like just a state mandated test because we're sitting there with like a pencil and it's like spot the difference between the two wings. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, it just I felt so much better and this might be my approach. I'm just going to be the old man at all fast, casual places I go. I don't care about my place in line. I've got all night. Like, whatever. Who cares? Well, I feel like the old man would have stayed in line and just pondered life while someone.

waited behind you going like, are you ready? Be like, sorry, I'm thinking about something from 40 years ago. Yeah, yeah, the war. Just Hooters flashbacks. I mean, your Hooters experience was kind of sad from last year.

The people around you. Yes. Up till that point, though, the best service that I'd have. Amy? Amy? Wow. Well, I had to, I went and revisited the episode. Okay.

Did my research. Amy sounded lovely. Amy, Amy, Amy. Amy was great. The food. Some, like, I insisted on reordering one of the things in this one because of it. Yes. Yeah.

Anyways, long story short, we filled out our menu, circled stuff, went up there, placed our order. No pressure. I loved it. Yeah. We knew what we wanted. We took our time. This is the way. Yes.

To quote. directional signs. Oh. And Star Wars. That's where my mind went. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah. Sure.

I don't want to go too much into the atmosphere because that's for next week. Oh. Do you want to learn about the history of Hootswings? Yes, please. Oh, you do. Yeah. I have had guests go, eh. Oh.

I mean, I didn't even know this place existed until very recently. Yeah, yeah. So I'm down. I'm glad you're down. I want you to want to learn stuff. Oh, so if I said no, would you have... We're going to plow through anyways. Oh, okay.

You're going to hear it. So it's better to have an eager... A positive mindset. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Great. Well, we're going to go into this week's Eat Deats. Eat Deets. Eatery details.

Eat Deets. Founded in 2017, in Cicero, Illinois, Hoots Wings is a fast casual Hooters Offshoot. So it essentially serves a reduced menu of Hooters food. but without table service, which means no Hooters girls. Yes. No Hooters short shorts or tight shirts. You know all about articles of clothing. Yes, I know how to list clothes. How did you feel about that?

I mean, I'm not going to a hooters. I'm not the demographic generally for a hooters restaurant, I feel like. So I was fine with no. and being scantily clad. So here's the thing. I'm totally fine with it. But if I had to choose. Okay.

All right. Well, if I had to choose, I'd go for the fully clothed person. You want them even more clothes than they were. Yeah, I want layers. Give me a sweater. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give me a hat. I want the like padded ski jacket that looks like little bubbles.

Yeah. You know what I'm talking about? I don't want to see any skin. Yeah. No skin whatsoever. And now a word from our totally not made up sponsor. Greetings. Harrison Augustine flying money water emoji.

Aurelius the 14th here. Back to Kloss up the fine dining podcast once again. Now let's talk about one thing that deeply offends me, the apparel of the working class. Hoot's wings, a t-shirt, and pants made of khaki. Offensive. If I haven't seen it at the Met Gala, I don't want it touching my skin. Now let me talk directly to you, who I assume is also in the working class, about fashion.

There's two things you need to consider when thinking about whether or not you want to buy an item of clothing. Thread count and sticker price. If you're paying at a discount, it isn't worth having. The finest items of clothing never go unsafe. And if there's anything else you desire to do to not come across like a peasant, I'm your man to help you. Believe me, I want everyone to be able to have what I have. I want you to be able to wear out in public the only coat that you can find that is half fur, half feather, all from the same animal, and I doubt you've ever heard of it. Anyways, acquire what I've acquired, and you too will be able to hire your poorer friend, Elon, to hold up your mic stand.

Very well, Elon. Bet you're regretting Dogecoin now. Anyways, I've got to get going. My coal-powered private jet that I use to combat climate activists is ready to go, and I've got a shark. cootery pool to dive into a la Scrooge McDuck. Tudeloo. Several of the locations feature a prominent sign out front that reads a hooters joint. Like they're a spike leave movie.

Yeah. Are they just trying to be cooler to compensate for taking away the- Yeah. So we're not sexy. We're just maybe like trying to apply like marijuana? I don't know. Like trying to go that way? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm not sure. That's what I think of when I think of joints. Not to say anything about my own lifestyle. That was such a unique sound that you just made. I can't even recreate it now. I don't think anyone could. Listeners, if you think you can recreate that noise that she just made, VV will give you $300. Okay.

Good luck. She agreed. You have to recreate it perfectly. And not just like repeat the clip. I'll know. I'll look at the sound waves. Yeah, it's like verbatim. Hoots employs both men and women and employees wear more traditional server clothing rather than the classic tank top and short shorts.

So I guess it's like targeted of people who like the food at Hooters, but maybe feel like uncomfortable with the environment that a normal hooters provides. They don't eat the show. I mean, because those Hooters employees are entertainers, right? That's what they're hired as. That's the loophole they use to discriminate against their bodies. So these people were not entertainers. It's casting. What are you saying?

They, I mean, they clearly just wanted us to take our order. Yes, yes, yes. Eat Deets. Hoots also offers catering, which is a big driver of their business. Oh. I'm curious if actual Hooters doesn't offer catering and only through Hoots can you get Hooters food catered to you. It doesn't make sense, though, because, yeah, I think. you would go to Hooters for the experience of it all.

Yeah. You wouldn't. I mean, yeah, because if they cater to you, would they have to then bring all that, like, the outfits and stuff to you? Boobes Express. Yeah. So I guess Hoot's Wings is just like, yeah, here are your wings.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's your sandwiches. That's right. Yeah. So Hoot's wings, you know you're just getting the food. Hooters, it's like there's that gray area of, well, are they providing the show? Yeah.

I like how we're referring to just a hot. person as a show. I'd rather say that. Bring the hot people. Come on. I don't know. I kind of like, bring the hot people.

All right. They also have some drive-through locations. Oh. Which. We did not have. No. I mean, we didn't even have a location.

We had a counter. Yeah. They're just all over the place. They cater. They've got drive-through. They're just a counter inside of a blaze. They do have some. full locations.

So they're really just throwing a bunch of stuff at the wall, seeing what sticks. I would probably see myself in a mood to maybe drive through and get some of their wings at some point. Yeah, because is there any place else

you can go and drive through to get proper wings? I don't think so. Is Hooters proper wings? Well, because KFC, I think I put in a different category. Yeah, and I wouldn't

even say KFC is food. No. All right. Let's see. Yeah, where are they on the... Oh, dear. 2.91 on the Chatsky of mediocrity. Not good.

It's the third worst. Not a good showing from KFC. Damn, you guys really hated KFC. It felt like KFC hated us. It's a mutual hate. Somewhat surprisingly, maybe, hoots has been fairly successful. Good for them. The same can't be said for hooters overall.

The chain's revenue dipped by around 2% in 2017. Over the past few years, they've been forced to close around 10% of their restaurants nationwide. Oh my gosh. Hooters. Hooters is in trouble. Hot people falling out of style. Dad bodd season, baby. Yeah, we like personalities here.

Not to say that hot people get up personalities. I'm sure they can. Oh, no. Here's your shovel. Eat Deats. Even so, Hoots has been expanding. In 2019, Hooters was bought by two private equity firms. Oh.

Nord Bay Capital and Tri-Ardison Capital Advisors. Those sound like private equity firms. Those sound like places where no one who works there sleeps well at night. Since then, the firms have been trying to save the company with a rebrand. Soon after the buyout, the firms announced two additional Hoots locations near Chicago. and a third in Atlanta. But that was just the beginning. Oh, my.

Nowadays, the Hoots franchise website is enthusiastically recruiting new entrepreneurs. From the site, the average American eats over 17,000 wings during the course of their lifetime. Oh, wow. Which is why we know that the demand for Hoots Wings is there. Okay. Also from the website, the estimated initial investment in a Hoots Wings franchise ranges from $448.5,000. to $1.2.5 million for an individual franchise. So clearly not the counter.

The counter is not putting in a million dollars. If they spent a million, they got robbed. Yeah. But they do have discounts available if you do multiple franchises. Okay. Making Hootswings one of the most affordable concepts in the booming QSR industry. Wow. I don't know what QSR me.

Quick service restaurant. You know what QSR me. I guess. There's no way it's not that. You know what? We're going to look up QSR. Please hold. It's actually like quirky.

Single Russian. Oh, oh. It's not quick service restaurant. Oh, okay. You have me second guess. It is. Quick service restaurant. Vives.

I'm amazing. What can I say? The champ. I like quirky single Russian. They also charge a $30,000 franchise fee. Overall, they're right, though, that is pretty affordable compared to other franchises we've covered on the show. Yeah, you can get into a hoot's wings for not.

Cheaper than tuition at a private university. You get it. Forget school, guys. Open a hoot. Yeah. Eat Deets. So far, the chain has signed a hundred and five. franchise agreements just last year. Oh, wow. Currently only ten are in development. Most of the others come in the form of multi-unit, multi-year deals. Texas and Southern California seem to be the most popular prospective locations, so residents can look forward to that, I guess.

Yeah. Are we looking forward to the expansion of Hoot's Wings? Why not? You know how when you type into Google and it like... Oh, auto fills. Yeah. Okay. Hoots wings by Hooters. Here are all of the predicted. Oh, okay.

What is the counterpart of Hooters? What is the opposite of Hooters restaurant? I wouldn't say the opposite. I feel like, well, just asking, what is the opposite? I'd imagine it's that park a restaurant that we fully covered. Or like, you know, those restaurants or those bars that are in like igloos? I don't. Oh, yeah, those exist.

I would, I would review one. Yeah. If they're mediocre. You should. I don't think it'd be. mediocre, or it better not be. But yeah, they give you like cold weather stuff. You have to be in there.

Why is that enjoyable? It's physically uncomfortable. The experience. And you're in it, you're in like an ice. Other hot people. Maybe they're hot in their clothing. Yeah, you'll never know. You'll just cover later.

What is the legal name of Hooters? It's asked like, is Hooters hiding something? You can just call me Hooters Reginald Hooters What is the male version of Hooters in Texas? Oh, does I exist? Oh, I feel like I want to go to this. I don't know, but someone's wondering.

And apparently several people are wondering. Yeah. What is the Hooters Girl rule? Oh, what is the rule? I don't know. You know what QSR is. Do you tell me? The rule is

your shorts must be at least five inches above your knee. Ladies and gentlemen, if you can recreate that noise, Veevi will send you 16,000 pennies. Oh, okay. All right. That's still a lot of money, but... That's, what, $160? I don't know.

Don't make me too bad. What age? is Hooters girl. Which one? Great, great follow. Necessary follow-up question. What Hooters stand for? What Hooters stand for?

Imagine if we were an acronym. That sounds like a question that the quirky single Russian is asking, What Hooters stand for? Should a 13-year-old go to Hooters? Well, should they? They can. Yeah. But should they?

Probably. Grow up a little faster. There you go. Is it okay for kids to go to Hooters? Why do girls work at Hooters? You know. It's literally a boob reference. Men can have boobs.

I attest. So there you go. Why are we discriminating against man boobs? I don't think I would go to a restaurant that was just moob-centric. What if it were a mix? What are we calling it utters? Oh, wow. But the guys can't have udders.

Only, only... You're very small-minded. Sorry, I'm thinking of cows. Because of males, bulls don't have utters, but yeah, okay. Yeah. Is Hooters like Twin Peaks? Can everyone go to Hooters? What is Miss Hooters?

I'm sorry, Dick, but am I a suspect? That's quite the laundry list of questions. Most of them about Gazongas. I'm just getting a detailed picture as all. Don't worry yourself, dollface. I'll get to the bottom of who took your... gift, and I know just who to question. Ooh.

Oh, hi there. My name's Jubb. I'm Petunia. And we were brought in for questioning. We're totally innocent. It's called a hit and run, and honestly, we took our time. We kind of hit and meandered. It was like a stroll. That's not a crime, and we dragged him into the woods to make sure he was off the road

so other people wouldn't hit him. Exactly. Kept him safe. We kind of did him a favor. Oh, that's not what we were brought in for. What is this? Well, I still want to elaborate on what happened to clear my name in case I get brought in for questioning on that unrelated crime. A vehicle is very heavy.

And sometimes you're operating it while playing a game called Pokemon Go. They make this game that's like, you want to play it on your phone, but you have to move around. And a car makes more sense than walking. I tell him he shouldn't do it in the car. He should just walk. But I didn't. He doesn't listen to me. Why would I?

I have good advice. Give me three pieces of advice right now that you think of. good. One, get eight hours to sleep in night. Two, don't cry while cutting an onion. It shows weakness. Three, don't mix beer with tranquilizers unless you've got four days to spare. Which I don't. I'm a busy guy. So speaking of which, are we free to go? Oh, we're still detained. Okay. Wait, this is about a t-shirt? Not a guy? A guy who was breathing last time we saw him. We checked. We did the thing where you hold a finger underneath his nose and I felt hot air. He seemed alive. Solve it quickly. She has an

Don't swim class to get to. I got to get to my class. I don't know how to swim. Today's the backstroke. Later, pigs. Oh, you flipped them off, okay. Oh, you gave them a thumbs up. Whatever.

Okay, bye. These two colorful characters, but guilty in this case, they didn't even know why they were here. Maybe they're just playing a part and I'm the fool. Surely we've got the purse. Their record alone is longer than this James' list of regrets. It's not that simple melody Their motives were weak

They didn't seem to care We've got to dig deeper There's more to this story We've got to find other people Witnesses People who give a hoot People who've been to hoots Wings

In this week's Yelp from Strangers We need a little Yelp, A little Yelp from strangers A little Yelp from strangers A one star Two star, three star four or buy yi so get a little yelp a little yelp a little yelp from strangers a little yelp a little yelp give us those complaints while you literally white

all right this is yelp from strangers our segment where we go to yelp and read out our favorite one two three four and five star yelp reviews of the very restaurant that we dined at two star review vives i'm gonna start a us off. Are you going to start us off? I'm going to start us off. Vee. Okay. I'm going to start us off. Yeah. With a two-star review. Oh my. This is from Neil H from Beverly Hills, California, July 23rd, 2023. He's written 45 Yelp reviews. So he's been around the block. Is he Yelp elite, though? No, he is not elite. Ah, so. As much as I'd like to leave a good review, since my friends told me that everything was like the original Hooters, I can't.

I haven't had Hooters in a long, long time, so I was looking forward to this. First, since I haven't been in so long, I couldn't remember if they used to ask if we wanted the chicken breaded or not. The guy who took my order asked me that question to which I asked which one is the original Hooters way. He said, not breaded. Which was false. Uh-oh. Yes. I'm sure I'll get people on here saying I should have known,

but it's been over 10 years, and wouldn't the original Hooters' wings be breaded? So that's that. Oh. I ordered the 30-pack for my family to go! I don't know. It's in all-caps. It just felt like it needed that extra.

That felt all caps. The extra Hutzpa. To go! I waited 20 minutes for a guy to come out like I was eating it there. So now it takes longer. And once I got home, the wings were cold. I asked for it well done,

and it was soggy, and the fries weren't crispy. Mind you, I live eight minutes, according to my ways, from this plaza. Terrible experience, and make sure you order

breaded if you're looking for the traditional Hooters experience. I gave it two stars, since friends I know enjoyed it. Unfortunately, me and my family didn't. It's your review. Yeah, he doesn't have. to take into account it's friends reviews.

I give it two stars because I hear others like it. Otherwise, I would have given it one. I don't want to be the odd man out. That didn't really sound like it deserved one star, though. I may give it a try again and we'll correct this review if it's a better experience. When was this? Two stars, July of 2020. Oh, okay, okay.

So he could still come back and have a better experience. It could slingshot into five-star territory. You never know. I feel like he was complaining. that they, so they brought it out as if he was going to eat there. He ordered it wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He ordered it wrong to his liking.

He wanted breaded and didn't get it breaded. They brought it out as a dine-in order and then packed it up to go. But it's not that hard to pack it up. So why is he making it seem like it's such a ordeal? Also, something's cold when you get home. Yeah. Heated up. Yeah.

There are multiple heating mechanism. Eight minutes is a long time for food to cool down. Yeah. So, I don't know. Anyways. I don't know if I agree. Okay. All right.

I love that you're like discrediting how he felt about his experience. Sorry. Yeah, no, your opinion is valid. I apologize. He's not listening. Well. I'm going to reach out to him on Yelp and send this too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is what we thought on our podcast. Four star review. All right. Oh, we do have an elite here. Michael M. Michael M. From Fullerton, California. He gave it four stars and included eight photos, which is great.

Eight photos. Yeah, we love. I love having supplementary material, right? To, like, support your argument? First time trying this location as it just opened, and I grew up going to Hooters for the wings. Honestly, I was a little disappointed by the food. We ordered a 30 party pack roasted bone-in wings and the Chipotle honey flavor, and the three-mile

island flavor were great, but the Buffalo hot was bland. That was a long sentence. I wish they added more sauce onto them. The curly fries were not even curly, and the fried pickles needed to be fried a little longer. wings were still good as they contained a good amount of meat, but I don't think I would pay $45 for this again. Service was a little slow even though they weren't busy, but it was hard to hear the cashier as they share a space with the Blaze Pizza.

Blaze Pizza isn't a loud place. It's not actually. Pizza is not a loud food. Blaze is honestly a pretty calm. It was a very quiet place when we were there. They initially brought out all my food and trays, and I had to clarify that I had said to go. Okay.

So this is a continuing problem. And you keep ordering the party pack. They assume you want the party there. Why wouldn't you have the party at Blaze Pizza? Who's taking a party to go? That one. The manager tried to say I said dine in, but there was no table available. After seeing this, they packed my food and I was on my way.

Honestly, it is so loud inside with the TVs going off, people ordering pizzas on one end and people ordering wings on the other. Hopefully they can get it together, but it gives wing stop or Buffalo Express vibes. It's the same concept of ordering wings or sandwiches and taking them to go. It isn't anything like Hooters used to be since they have a very limited menu. He gave this four stars. It sounded like he was pretty negative, though. I mean, maybe those two wing flavors he liked really just sent him into another place.

Yeah, yeah. So that's what really got the score. Yeah, and a lot of people just, the words they write and the number they give just do not have a connection. Yeah, because I was expecting glowing comments and then it just was really negative. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I appreciate the photos. The wings do look good. We had them.

We did. You've been. We were? We were there. Yeah. What? You'll find out next week. You can go download our full Yelp from Strangers segment at our Patreon.

The link for that is in the description of this episode, or you can go to Patreon.com slash fine dining podcast. And we're now offering a one week free trial. So what do you have to lose? Go check it out. People have wild opinions. And we get to read, oh, so many of them. Thanks.

Now, there is one other thing from Yelp that I found, but it doesn't qualify as a review. Okay. But you can ask questions like Quora or like. Oh, sure. Yahoo. Yeah, do they take credit card or whatever? Are there any hooter girls working here? Oh, no.

Asked by Johnson L. Oh, of course. Johnson's asking. Come on. Two answers. Oh, he caught responses. One by general manager With the hootswings logo

So the restaurant responded No Space exclamation point We are Fast Casual Capital D dining For when you want a quick Capital W wing fix

No we are Fast Casual dining for when you want a quick wing fix Loaded with airs I mean I guess You can still have tits You know You can still offer the show

Yes, exactly. I don't know. Yeah, I don't think that necessarily answers why the reasoning. But yes, there are no hooter girls there. Response number two. Oh, let's go. From Truman W. Now, Truman is a man of the people.

Man. I don't even need to read it. You made a better connection. 77 friends. Okay. You're all about the friends. In this one, I am. All right.

645 Yelp reviews. Dang. Over 1,200 photos uploaded. Someone is prolific. Then why are you using Hooters' name to mislead the public? Oh, Truman. True man. Coming in hot with that true man.

Oh, the sats. Mm. Okay, we've covered the history of Hoot's wings by Hooters, a Hooters joint. Yes. We've heard what other people have to say about this place in Yelp from Strange. Mm-hmm. Your gift bag is still nowhere to be found. Yes.

You're making me feel bad. I mean... It's like we're... But, like, we're coming to a close. We're at the end of part one. Yeah. Where's my... Actually, there's another suspect.

He's been watching over us this whole time, like a vulture, circling his prey. Juicy Jr., you've been at the scene of the crime the entire time and haven't said a word. Whoa, just because... I'm normally served with pork doesn't mean I talk to pigs. If you don't return the skirt's property tour, I'll turn you upside down and make a pound cake out of you. Do you hear me? Dick. I'm not messing around. I'll hollow out your carcass and put you under the sea for a sentient snail and sponge to live inside of. Dick!

What? He's not our guy. How do you figure? I know who did it. It's the Hooter Bowl, Ace. The answer was never going to be in the moment. main show. You've got me as crossed up as a rosary on Sunday. The commercials, babe, this one day of the year, it's all about the commercials. Remember my lost gift? A shirt, sure, but what was so special about it? Not just any shirt, a t-shirt, the uniform of the working class. My gun. Harrison. Now let's talk about one thing that deeply offends me, the apparel of the working class. A t-shirt? If I haven't seen it at the Met Gala, I don't want it touching my skin. I didn't see it before, but I can have my boys there faster than a chinchilla on a treadmill.

Pack it up. You're all free to go. I'm just going to keep hanging on the Chochke because I live here. I'm proud of you, kid. You didn't even really need me. Do I still have to pay you? Desperately, yes. I'm in so much debt. I bet on chicken fight. So there we were. I'd get my gift, but more importantly, I learned that I had the gift all along. In this city of smoke and mirrors, where truth and lies entwine like lovers in the night,

I realized I didn't need Detective Diochre to untangle my knots. He was just another fleeting shadow in my story, a character at his conclusion. Stevie, hey, hey. You're monologuing. Was I? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like you've got major main character syndrome right now. Uh, excuse you?

What? Main character syndrome? Um, this concludes part one of the Hoot Swings episode of the Fine Dining Podcast. Join us next time. I am on Instagram at Selah Veev. You can follow Fine Dining Podcast on Instagram and TikTok. Feel free to email us with any questions, concerns. Fine Dining Podcast at gmail.com.

We're on Patreon. Donate. We're on YouTube now. We're doing video. So like, subscribe, comment. Look at us. You can see our faces. We're going to continue this next week.

We're going to actually review the restaurant at this point. And maybe I get my shirt wherever it may be. Yeah, probably. That's very optimistic. Anyway, until now, we're going to be waiting for our table. Have a fine day. Waiting on our table, waiting on our table The step is done and we had some fun now

We're waiting on our table, waiting on, we're stuck in line, waiting on you, I search for mediocrity Go swimming