Fine Dining - MOOYAH: A Funny Burger That's Expensive But Delicious

Episode Date: May 27, 2026

🍔🔥 MOOYAH: Better Burger Boom, Secret Menus, and Bird Poop 🔥🍔 This week, Sandy Rose joins me to break down the history of MOOYAH Burgers, Fries & Shakes, a burger chain that emerged from the "better burger" gold rush and somehow managed to stay decent even after private equity got involved. Along the way, Sandy and I debate whether being pooped on by a bird is actually good luck, unpack MOOYAH's aggressively goofy brand voice, and discover that apparently every restaurant chain on Earth is trying to expand into Dubai. 🍔 Founded by Veterans During the "Better Burger" Wave 🤣 The Chain's Extremely Silly Brand Voice 📜 The Hall of Dang and the Magic of Secret Menus 🌍 Dubai Expansion Because EVERYONE'S Doing It 💰 Surviving Private Equity Ownership Without Losing the Plot 🔥 The Heat Lamp: Sandy Claims You Shouldn't Need a Drink with Dinner 💘 Yelp from Strangers: A Cashier Accidentally Helps a Customer Get Laid 💬 COMMENT BELOW: What's the greatest secret menu item of all time? 📢 SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: 🎉 Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast 💬 Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 🎥 Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw 🔗 All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast 🎤 Guest: Sandy Rose Patreon Producers:Sue Ornelas, Joyce Van, & Robert McLaughlin Patreon Subscribers:David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers:Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael, Crystal C., NiZ 👉 NEXT WEEK: We head to MOOYAH to review the food and put it to the Chili's Test.

Is Muya the best kept secret in the fast, casual burger scene? With its charmingly goofy brand voice that says things like Muya's success made dogs hug cats and angels sing 80s songs, Muya entered a crowded field against the likes of five guys, smash burger, and ShakeShack looking to make an impact. Leaning heavily on their patrons' ability to customize their burgers exactly how they want it, Muya is an elevated burger king that allows you to have it your way, unless that way is affordable.

At well over $20 for a burger, fries, and a drink, Muya is up there with its counterparts in the so-called Better Burger category in both product quality and price. If I'm spending 20 big ones on a burger instead of mandatory valet parking because I chose to go out on a Saturday night in Hollywood, I want it to be great. And Muya, by all accounts, is, as its home of the Dallas-Fort Worth area

has voted Muya the best burger in D.F. multiple times throughout the years, despite the chain now being owned by private equity and ballooning to almost 100 locations worldwide. This week on the show, I'll let my milkshake of knowledge bring all the boys to the yard of curiosity so that you two may know everything I've learned about muya. Then we'll direct our attention to the people of Yelp to see what they're saying about the very muya we dined at. This is the fine dining podcast. Milkshake of knowledge. We could just get past that.

It's always my something of knowledge and your blank of curiosity. And technically it should have been my milkshake of, your milkshake of curiosity comes to my yard of knowledge, I think would have converged in a more sensible way. But I just always frame it in that format. Okay. Got it. I'm a bad guy. I'm a bad human being for coming up with it in that way. Um, hello and welcome to the fine dining podcast, the quest to compare all restaurants to Chili's.

I'm your host, Michael Ornellis, and this is the podcast where we dive deep into the history of your favorite restaurants and then thoroughly review them one week later by comparing them to Chili's. This week, we're covering the number three seed in 2026's upcoming Septemberger tournament, Muya. And joining me is perhaps my favorite person to play board games with. She's one of my good friends as we go back almost a decade now. She's a podcast two-timer, but you can hear her voice peppered throughout almost all of my episode since late 2023. It's Sandy Rose. Hi. How's it going?

Yay. Good to be here. Can I tell just tell you a story about my life? Yes. I got pooped on by a bird yesterday. Okay. What's your response to that? I have heard that it is good luck.

Okay. Everyone involved in this process, like, because I was like with a group of friends walking. The two people who were directly next to me when it happened were like, oh, that's good luck. And I'm like, there's no way this does not feel lucky. And then we caught up to some other people that were in our group and they were like, oh, that's good luck. And I'm just like, what is happening? And then we went into a bar and I went to like ask for soda water to like wipe stuff off, right?

You didn't want that on you the rest of the night? I did not want it as part of me. and they were like, oh, that's good luck. And am I the only person who hasn't heard that getting dumped on by a bird is good luck? I guess you are the only person who hasn't heard that, but I also don't. It seems like an omen to me. Like more shit is coming. Yeah.

No, I just canceled my plans for the rest of the night and went home. Because I'm going to pack it up. Didn't feel lucky. Pay $20 for mandatory parking and get out of here. Yeah. Well, that was late. I went home, cleaned up, and then went out to that. I did not attend a concert with my.

soda water. Anyway, Sandy, do you have a history with Muya? No, I had never heard of it until we went. Yeah. That was kind of my situation as well. I did research for what burger chains I want in this year's September or tournament. And I came up with like four or five that haven't been in one of these tournaments

yet that felt like must haves. McDonald's, the Habit, Burger King, Five guys, Fat Burger. Wow. all of those, I can't believe you haven't done yet. Which just goes to show there's so many. There's so many. And then figuring out those last three spots, I was like, okay, which direction do I want to go? And I ended up picking the smash burger chain, this one, Muya.

And then I don't know if I want to announce the eighth one because I'm not locked in on what it is yet. Okay, don't announce it. But there's a place that's like kind of on the same level as Muya in terms of reputation and like type of presentation. Okay. called BurgerFi. Oh, yeah, I've heard of that one. Okay. I'm just not going anywhere between now and September that has a burger

pie close. I'm going to Chicago in a few weeks and like I could drive them, but I don't have a guest for them. There's not one in L.A. There's not one in L.A. Where did I hear of it then? There's also a place called Hopdottie that was like they're a Texas chain. They're based out of Austin.

I remember going to the original one and they've become a chain now. They have one in Marina del Rey. Oh, wow. So it's like there's some here. I don't know what I want to commit to for that. last chain. Comment below if there's like a chain that I should do for the eighth one, I guess. And you already did so many in the other. I've done so many in years past. Yeah. And so Muya was one that came up on a list of like, I was just looking up like, what are the best fast food or fast casual

burgers? And it popped up and I only saw it on like one list, but it was so high on that list that I was like, oh, someone thinks this is one of the best burgers out there. And, and it was. And And then when I'm not seeing it on other lists, I'm just like, well, but their list is like, they have jack in the box on there. So what is their opinion mean? Yeah. What were, where were the other ones on the list that Muya was on? Do you remember? Like Shake Shack. Okay. So kind of elevated. Yeah. I don't know if other people would consider Shake Shack Elevated. It is. I mean, it's, it's part of, there was a wave of burger companies that are like called the Better Burger Boom. And it's like Shake Shack Five Guys, this smash burger. There's a few other places that kind of came along, but they're they're kind of the notoriously more expensive places that do promote better ingredients. And in general, tend to be a little bit better if value isn't part of your consideration. And for some people, value is a huge part of your consideration. I mean. As in like more affordable?

Yeah. Okay. Like in and out is one of the best burgers for its price point. It is remarkably consistent and it is very affordable. Have you already done that in your... They won two years ago. Oh, okay. Yeah.

These are kind of like the last eight that it feels like I haven't done. There's no more burgers. But all that to say, I have no history of Muya other than the reputation of researching it. You have no history with Muya. Do you want to hear the history of Muya? Yes, please. All right, we're going to jump into this week's eat deets. Eatery details.

Muya is a fast casual burger chain that was founded by veterans, Rich Hick, and Todd Ister in Plano, Texas in 2007, as part of the better burger boom that included higher quality chains, such as Five Guys, Jake Shack, BurgerFi, and Smash Burger. So it started in Texas, I'm assuming you'll get there next where it went after that. I haven't, like, charted its exact growth, but like it is pretty spread out at this point. I mean, the fact that there's some here in California. Totally. There's some in Texas. There's, they have a decent footprint.

I'll put a map up on screen here. Click up. Look at the map. I might not if I don't find one. But I'll talk later. They do have some locations internationally in an area that might surprise you. What? Okay.

We'll find out. Some of the aspects touted by Muya's marketing is the Build Your Own Burger Experience with loads of customization options, as well as their never frozen 100% certified Angus Beef and their non-GMO potato buns that as of 2011 are baked, fresh in-house. They also hang their hat on their fresh-cut fries and milkshakes. I will say I'm a sucker for some good better burger marketing stuff. Like if they're like, this is fresh, this is not frozen, and this is baked in-house, I'm there. Like, I want to eat good stuff. I think the main thing that people push back on with these is the price point. But when you're going to a place that is telling you this is going to be better quality, I think if you can afford it, You have to make peace with that.

I think that I, that's everything. Like, for example, I will pay, I will pay more for like a quality, like, practitioner, for example, for some, like, mental health or, like, functional medicine or something that's going to be worth it. You know, it's like, I'm not going to look for a cheaper product that I want good results from. What's the white castle of a doctor's office? Well, I don't know. What is white castle in your mind? Oh, shit. That's one on the

Dodge keyboard. Doctor's office. I mean, this is getting into like politics of medicine and everything. I don't know. Are you trying to say better help? But you don't want to?

Sure. Better help. Yeah, absolutely. No, I'll talk trash about them. I used to be on Medi-Cal and they would just give me a random doctor's office. And it's just like, I feel like the people there are just like, it's like, I don't know, they didn't seem to really. care. Like if the nurses are like, who are you? I don't know. That type of a thing is like, I want to pay for like a doctor who's like going to sit with me and give a shit and ask me questions and like remember you from last time. Yeah. Or like specialized in something. You know, and they're going to like look at something in the meantime and then come back to to me later. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of health issues. I am very sick. That's what we're getting at the day. You have many doctors. Exactly.

company voice is comedic in nature with multiple funny write-ups on their website, such as, a wise man once said, do one thing well. The problem is we couldn't choose between burgers, fries, and shakes. So we said, forget that guy. Besides, who is he anyways? He sure doesn't sound wise. Can he even cook? That guy probably eats tofu. Oh, my God. They're so mean to this guy. He's supposed to be wise. Give him a break. They're doubting it. But that's kind of of like the overall pervading comedic voice of like when you read their history on their website. You know, they have like, here's our history. It was scribbled on napkins and an intern put it all together into here.

It's kind of aggressively funny. Aggressively humorous. Yeah. It's funny in the way that greeting cards can be funny. Some greeting cards can be very funny. I know. And some of these little blurbs I was like, okay. All right.

You tried. Like I didn't hate the one that I just read to you, but it was also like, all right, you're trying very hard. Yeah. I'm sure it's difficult to find a balance between like we have to market this to absolutely everyone. Like I think the only way to be organically funny is to be like Wendy's Twitter where it's like it's reactive. Yes, yes. As opposed to like here's a thing we wrote. And we're trying to sell our product at the same time. Yeah.

It's a little balance. But I like it. I genuinely, even if it's not funny, I always like that, hey, let's call a spade a spade. like that kind of energy of like, hey, we both think this is stupid. Yeah, a little bit of a wink to it. I like it. I'm here for it. I love that for you.

We were talking about that phrase earlier. That's too sarcastic or if it's genuine. It feels so loaded of like, well, you're just operating on a lower wavelength. Not for me, but for you, I love it. I hate that. Dubai became the first international Muya in 2013 and the chain's 50th restaurant. And by late that year, the system was already at 54 units. Muya hit 100 restaurants in 2016 with a store in Tuscaloosa.

And later reporting says the chain climbed above 100 units before the pandemic. Wow. Yeah. My impression of Dubai is like rich, I guess, wealthy. And in so many ways, trying to present Western culture because Dubai is the single place where so many of these chains that I've covered open an international location. Really? Yeah. That's cool. There are so many American chains that have opened in Dubai. Wow. It's making me realize I don't really know much about Dubai. Everything I know about Dubai I learned from the Sex and the City movie.

Because they go there. Yeah. Interesting. I have not. seen any sex in the city. None of the series or the movies. None of it. None of it. Would you be interested in watching it? Should we start a podcast on that? Stay tuned.

No, let's not do that. I don't want to do that. 2017 was a big year for the chain. Muya introduced the Burger Hall of Dang, which is essentially their compendium of Build Your Own burgers that have morphed into a secret menu, including the hamburger dog. insane creation where quartered hot dogs are added to a burger with crispy onion strings, bacon, jalapeno's, trinner cheese, and ketchup. To quote Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park,

their scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should. But life finds a way. But life finds a way. And we create the Hall of Dang. We create the Hall of Dang. We create the Hambur Dog. Great name. The Hambur Dog is a great name. Oh, I thought you're saying Hall of Dang is a great name. No, Holl of Dang is an okay name. Whatever. Amber dog, great name. If they had like six A's and it was the Hall of Dang. That'd be so much better. Genuinely, Muya, add five A's.

That's true. Drop the V, you know. It's cleaner. I like it as this thing of like, well, if you know, you know. But then they actually literally had a board with all their Hall of Dang burgers on it today. So it no longer felt like a secret menu. Oh, you're right. It did feel like a secret menu.

And because you had looked at it before we ordered and you were ordering and I was like, how does you know? And then I looked to my right and I was like on the board. But I did it from memory. I said them without having to reference the board. And she like a good like speak easy bouncer was like, I'll open the door. Exactly. Yep. The hamburger dog putting it in.

And I was like, oh, I knew it. The well done you putting it in. And I look over and it was like, anyone gets into this club. Yes. Have I ever told you about the time? I'm not going to give away the hotel or the event, but my friend and I went to event downtown. And we were told to park, to roll up to this hotel nearby and say, we're just visiting. You did tell me about this.

Yeah. We're just visiting this one room. And we were like, what's, what's going to happen when we say this? So we came up, we rolled up and we're like, we're here to visit X room. And he goes, that's all I need to know. And he opened my door. And we just got out. And it was like, handshake deal.

we're done. It was the craziest speak easy moment of it. It's so crazy to realize the world runs in secret ways. Right. And when you get to experience that secret way, it's like touch in heaven. Yeah. I think it would be, I would have a blast if I knew one password. Oh, yeah. For just one thing. I don't even care what it is unless it's like a cheese club. Oh, you all can have that. Well, you did know the password. You said the menu items on the holiday. And she was like, yes, yes, yes. I know what talking about it was right there. It's like guessing the Wi-Fi password and then you look over and it was posted. But you didn't look at it. But you didn't look at it. Yeah. It's like I was here once. I remember it, I think. 2017 was also the year that Muya sold to a private equity firm to help with franchising growth. For me personally, this is always the sign that a company's quality is about to dip. Regardless of private equity, though, the 2020 pandemic led to a recession in Muya locations as there were down to 81 units by 2022. and lost another seven by the end of 2024.

That's hard. I guess it's like the owner, what they sell it because they want to make more money or get out of business. Yeah, I mean, sometimes it's just your ambition becomes how big can I be? And I just think that's the wrong mindset. I think it should be, is my quality still what it was? And if you can add more with that great, but to be like, my goal now is just to be like, let's get 30 more locations. Let's get 100 more locations.

Well, but it makes me think of like, why did they go into business in the first place? Yeah. And literally was it just like we like making burgers? We want to make money from this. This was like their third, from what I saw, third restaurant together. They had, or I don't even know if a single restaurant, but like they had done Mexican food restaurants before. And they had done like country style restaurants before. So this was just like, well, let's do burgers now.

Wow. I wonder what they're doing now. Do you know? I don't know. When I hear that they're veterans, my mind doesn't assume veterans can be young and I know they can be. Absolutely they can be. But my brain is like, these are two old men who retired and then started a burger chain in 2006, 2007, whatever it was. And that was 20 years ago. Yeah. So I assume that they're like really old now. Super retired. But that just might be wrong. I don't know their age. Okay, fair enough. Yeah. And yeah, and then for the private equity to still then have the restaurants shrink feels like a step back, but they did have a pandemic to contend with. So kind of forgivable. And I will say, this didn't taste like private equity food. Ooh.

It didn't. I don't know. And that's a compliment. I don't know what private equity food tastes like. To me, it's cut corners. Like any restaurant you've been to where you're like, has this fallen off a little bit? that to me is an indicator of like, oh, they sold to somebody. Someone else is just worried about aggressive expansion and cutting margins and or expanding margins. And to do so, they'll cut corners on like ingredient sourcing and stuff like that. Or like they'll get the cheaper version of everything. And then eventually that seeps into the product quality and the taste and the experience that you have. I feel like I see that just rampant across a lot of the chains I've been to that I'm like, I used to love this place. What's different now? Oh, yeah.

No, it all tasted really fresh. Yeah. So the cleanest hard count is still 74 total units at year end of 2024, but 2025 company materials describe Muya as a nearly 90 unit or over 80 location brand. And the official international page currently lists five stores across three Gulf countries in the Middle East. That's just wild. I'd never heard of this place because there's literally just so many restaurants. I mean, 100.

restaurants, let's say they have exactly 100 all in the U.S., which they don't, but like approximately. Distributed evenly, that's still two per state. So it's like you're in California, let's say one's in San Francisco and one's in San Diego. You're in L.A. You're not going to hear of it. So it's like it's prevalent enough that like anywhere you are, you're not going to have to drive super far to get one. And that's not even true. It's not just two in every state, you know? There's regional clustering for sure. but in general, something can have a lot of locations and you still never have heard of it. Yeah. Like there's, have you ever heard of Captain D's? No. So it's like a Long John Silver's, but it's more East Coast or like I think Tennessee's, I want to say where it's headquartered.

That could be wrong. But there's like 600 locations nationwide. You can cut this, but I keep thinking, ever heard of Captain D's nuts? No I just had to say I'm going to search it and then insert it here Whatever that is

Is it born Captain D's nuts Yeah No it's nothing I don't know It's just in my head I couldn't Absolutely not cutting that now

It was low lying fruit I had to pick it up D's nuts And that'll do it For this week's Eat D's nuts Okay, Sandy, I'm shocked that you're doing this podcast and not Joe Rogan due to all of the controversial opinions you've got. This next segment is your opportunity to get canceled for how you feel about food and restaurants.

It's time for the heat lamp. Sandy, the red bulb is burning. What is your restaurant hot take? Okay, this is more of just like a eating hot take. I don't think that people need to drink during their meals. Like, you don't need a drink with your food. What does that even, like, why? Like, I'm never, like, eating my food and then I need to pause and, like, take a drink.

Like it just like it ruins the flow. It ruins the taste profile. It ruins your digestion, probably. This sounds like you're saying like it's a you problem. If you need water to wash something down. Wow. You need to be hydrated. Weak.

Yeah. Really weak. No, but I think that like the pH of your stomach acid can mix with the drink and like ruin digestion. Let me ask. Do you think or do you know? I know. No. There's no.

way that that's just a thing that you know. I actually think that's true. Look it up. I mentioned earlier that I'm very sick, so I have learned a lot. So maybe we should disregard any medical sounding advice. Maybe I should start drinking during food. No, but I just think like I will drink after a meal. Yeah.

I'll drink my water, sit my little water. But during a meal, I'm like, oh, I don't need it. I think the closest thing I have to relating to. to this, which is not relating to this at all, is when I eat a hamburger or something that is like a finger or like in your hand food, not with utensils, I don't set it down until it's done. I think picking up a hamburger and then setting it back down to then eat something else is crazy behavior. Why?

Because you have the perfect handful and you don't want to let go. You have the grip on it and you're holding the elements together. When you do that, the bun separates. and now like your bite marks have made the terrain uneven. So it just falls apart the moment you set it down. But also it just feels like this is a single process. I picked it up. I eat it till it's gone.

I did that. Now, if you have the burger, that's fine. You can do that twice and you can have that intermission in between. But to me, it sounds like what you're saying is like don't interrupt the flow. And so picking up a burger and not setting it down is my closest way of relating to that idea. I guess so. I guess that's a good way of putting it. Do you also not eat, like, if you have three types of food on your plate, you won't intermix the order that you're eating? I don't mind it. Like if there's like meat, peas and potatoes, whatever. My brain will usually be like, eat all your fries right now. All right, now move on to the burger.

Okay. But I think that's just due to like, part of it is the sensation on my finger. where it's like I don't want my fingers to get a different type of greasy. I want to do. Like a sensory experience for you. Yeah. It's a sensory thing. Yeah. A burger you can sometimes get like grease on like your wrist or your hand.

And it's like I hate that. I do not like getting my hands dirty when I eat at all. I'm the kind of guy who like I will put a napkin there is like a thing to catch. Like I do not like dirty hands at all. Yeah. I also lift if I'm eating. I'm not going to cup it like this like with my wrists. What have you ever?

Sounds like that's. how you eat it. If it's rolling down your wrist. I don't know. Like if I'm holding it, it's going to be like this. Oh, for me, sometimes burger will like, it'll find an opening like, oh, it'll go down the pinky and then it'll like go that way. That's like, I don't know if you have experience. Like if I'm like washing my face at night and the water, the soapy water like runs down to my elbows. I hate that. Like the same thing. Yeah. Again, it's just a sensory thing. Sure. Yeah, that might be similar. I just really think it disrupts the taste profile.

for me. It almost, it almost to me signals, maybe this is just habitual on my part, it signals the end of a meal. So if I drink, I'm like, oh, I'm done now. Interesting. To me, I'm not drinking soda for this year, but to me, there are certain sodas that mix well with certain foods. So, like, in and out, goes with root beer. If I go to in and out, I can take a bite of burger, drink root beer. And to me, it complements the flavor. And then I go back to the burger. Wow. Yeah. I want to try that. And just, like, different, like. See, that's a. thing too for me. I think of soda as kind of like a dessert type of thing. I mean, it's sugar. It's a very sweet thing. So to me, it's just like another flavor in there. Water, I can understand

your take from like a dilution standpoint. I don't think it like ruins the palate. To me, it just refreshes it so it's like, oh, I can have the equivalent of a first bite again. Oh, okay. Which is sometimes nice because, you know, you take a first bite and it tastes kind of the most powerful version of it and then it kind of coats your palate and then subsequent bites. I think the coating is something I like though. Okay. It might be related to texture stuff for me. You just want a one-time coating.

You don't want to double coat. Yeah. But also I think it, I don't know, I get the sense that some people are like, I need a drink while I'm eating. As a guy who eats a lot of like carbs and bready things, sometimes to help the bread get smaller to go down better. Okay, hot dog eating contest vibes. Yes. I want to dunk my food in water.

Ew. I don't. Yes, that is the equivalent in my mind where I'm like, I don't need water mixing with this food. But to me, sometimes it's like it needs it

because my throat is feeling heavy. Coated. Yeah. So. Fair enough. All right. Well, you're out of the hot seat, I guess.

You do not need to drink while you eat. Thank you. Wild. Thank you so much. It's time to turn our attention to other people, though, and hear what they thought about the muya that we ate at in this week's Yelp from Strangers. We need a little Yelp, a little Yelp from strangers. A one star, two star, three star, four, or bye, aye. So get a little Yelp.

A little Yelp, a little Yelp. All right, this is Yelp from Strangers, our segment where we turn to Yelp and read out, our favorite. One, two, three, four, and five star yelp reviews of the very restaurant that we went to. Do you mind if I read the first one? Sure. Five star review. It's crazy that that was your voice just now that said five star review. Oh, wow. That was me. This is a five star review from Nathan Benning. I don't know why that's part of his name, but it is. from San Francisco, California on February 27, 26. Is that maybe because his name ran out of space on the form and it's Bennington? No, because I've seen some very long names.

Weird. Yeah. Samuel is the epitome of what a wingman should be. What? Yeah. This is just from Muya? This is his Muya review. Five stars for Samuel, who works there.

This is a great opening lines. It's like Moby Dick opening line quality. His white whale. Samuel. Samuel. the homie recognized the play from the moment I walked in with my date and knew exactly what

to do to break the ice. They went on a date to Muya. I wonder which date it was. I'm judging. I'm judging. Date shame people who go to, are you, do you remember that list that went viral of like places that like do not take a woman on

a first day? And it was just all the chain restaurants. Right. And it's like, I don't know. I'm of the opinion that like a first date is especially if it's like from the apps or something. Low stakes. Just go somewhere where you can talk and get to know somebody. And to me, those places are perfect.

It's like, am I going to take you on like a true fine dining Michelin experience on a first? Like, that's like a, oh, we're more serious or an anniversary or an occasion or. But also, I guess just from the framing of this where he's like, I was glad to have a wingman. I don't know he was going to say, but apparently he liked what Samuel did for him with his day. It sounds like he wanted this to go well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so I'm like, sounds like you really wanted to put in some work for this date. Yeah.

I don't know. Maybe I'm judging a little bit. Yeah, but it could be like, this place is the best burger in all of Valencia. That's right. Apparently. Our mental telepathy instantly kicked in and he guided us through the menu and each other's food options. He set us up with a nice meal and did some playful roasting of my date to add to our evening. Sounds like Samuel was just flirting with his day.

Yeah. Going to be real. Top tier service with a small. smile. Samuel, if you see this, thank you for your work this evening. It sounds like he got laid. It just sounds like he got laid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It also sounds like he's Samuel's friend and he wanted to give Samuel a bump to his employer. But in the weirdest way of like, hey, your employer, I just want you to know that like, got me late. Samuel helped me get it in. Yeah. Yeah. So not a review of the restaurant. This doesn't need to be on yelp.

No. This is not helping anyone decide to eat here. No one is like, I want to. Unless someone's like a really anxious dater and they're like, where can I go with it? I'll have a wing man right there built into the experience. Or they're single and they think they'll go like get picked up or like pick someone up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Hmm. I don't know. Four star review. Let's read this four star from G. Yeah. I have been intrigued by the place for the longest time. The name alone, Muya, is just perfect. It stands out.

is memorable and so catchy. Saying this name just brings me so much joy. Really fixated on the name. We got two lines in already. Still nothing about it. So much joy. So huge points for this. Came in on a Wednesday afternoon and the place was dead.

Great. Great start to this interview. This is a four star by the way. This is a positive. If you like eating alone, go here. A worker was training a new guy, but I get that. Not going to hold anything against him for that. Great.

Why would you? Cage, come on. Food did. Someone started their job here today. Oh, I'll get over it. Gross. People weren't born working here. That's fine.

Yeah. Food did take a while to get made, but I really can't be that mad. The guy is new. It's all good. So between the name of the place and the new guy, we know that everything is going to get like three or four sentences. Yeah, exactly. Topic. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Once the burger did get to me, oh, my. That burger was phenomenal. Two sentences about the burger. Ordered the Muya cheeseburger. He's also fully capitalizing Muya to be like... That is the stylization though. That is how they do it.

To be consistent with the stylization. Literally everywhere in my teleprompter script, I also capitalized Muya. You are Gage and Gages you. Gages me. Ordered the Muya cheeseburger with fries and a drink and it was just so good. The burger was juicy and had so much flavor. The Muya sauce complimented the burger so well. Got to have some solid.

on there. Oh, the bun two was so soft. I love his use of so. It's very, um, the bun two was so soft, fluffy and warm. That is six sentences so far about the burger. Just saying. It was more than the first guy gave it. Yeah. The fries too might be the best part. Really had some five guys vibes. Five guys vibes. Five guys vibes. Five guys vibes. Yeah, I can't. That is hard. Seriously, some of the best fries I've ever had. Two sentences about the fries. Wait, three sentences about the frie. The only and only reason why this is not a five out of five is the price. It is very pricey. That's two sentences about the price.

Around $18 for all of this is a bit wild, but in today's economy, it is to be expected. Still, I do think that the more I come here, the higher the score will get. Wow, I'm just going to keep going up. Eventually, it'll be a six. Right. I'm like, he's out of four already. Yeah. Well, that was very sweet.

It was very endearing. He's just very enthusiastic. I love, I genuinely, I genuinely, I'm making fun of it, but like, I love the enthusiasm. Yeah, exactly. I do like it as well. He's given 12 burger reviews. This also felt like a high schooler when you're assigned an essay and you have a word count to hit.

And you're like, how many ways can I say the same thing? This kind of felt adjacent to that. Absolutely. He was trying to fill his face with all the soes and everything. Hey there. It's me, Michael. And now that we're in season four, I'm adding more content to my Patreon. Not only can you hear the extended Yelp from Stranger segment with three more reviews,

and not only can you get an exclusive full episode covering an extra chain restaurant on the last day of each month, but I've added an extra chat with my guests where we discuss their go-to fast food and chain restaurants and talk about why they love them so much. I hope you'll come check it out, and you can get your first week completely free of charge. That's patreon.com slash fine dining podcast. I appreciate and love you all. Back to the episode. And that is part one.

Tune in next week as we tell you what we thought about our meal at Muya. Sandy, thank you so much for joining me. Thanks for having me. Tell people where they can follow you on your socials if that's the thing you want them to do. Well, maybe not. All right. You can follow this show on Instagram and TikTok at Fine Dining Podcast. You can join the conversation on my Discord.

You can support the show directly by going to my Patreon. You'll get an exclusive episode every single month, exclusive conversations with my guests where I talk about their go-to restaurant rotations, and the full uncut version of the Yelp from Strangers and occasional other little things that I decide to do for it. Every dollar supports the show directly. So I obviously appreciate every Patreon subscriber that I get, but also every non-Patriot person that just enjoys the show. show. I appreciate you as well. We will just be here one more week waiting on our table. We'll

see you next time as we review Muya. Thanks for watching. Have a fine day.