Fine Dining - P.F. Chang's History feat. Andres Simonian (Spanish Wendy's Guy, Y-List Actor) [Part One]

Episode Date: May 15, 2024

It took 55 episodes to do Chinese food! Actor Andres Simonian (one of the Wendy's guys in the Spanish-speaking markets) joins me this week, covering the history and the Yelp reviews for P.F. Chang's The whitewashing of "P.F. Chang's" is uncovered in this week's Eat Deets Andres is called on his lie about getting stuck in "unexpected" traffic Michael & Andres try the Lettuce Wraps since they didn't order them during their meal What are Michael & Andres' fortunes? Discussion about P.F. Chang's restaurants in Asia A guy on Yelp thought a self-acknowledged Chauvinistic review would play well "Fine" Dining is now on video! Head on over to our YouTube to watch this episode!   Music by: James McEnelly (@Ramshackle_Music) Theme Song by: Kyle Schieffer (@JazzyJellyfish) Segment Transitions Voiced by: Sandy Rose "Fine" Dining is on Patreon! Get an extra episode every month (April's episode dropped at the end of the month, and I visited Shari's Restaurant & Pies with first-time podcast 3-peat guest, my cousin Emma Danger), extended Yelp from Strangers segments every other week, merch discounts, download access to our music including the 7 singles from our Olive Garden musical, and more! Patreon Producers: Sean Spademan, Joyce Van, & Sue Ornelas   Get the 5 Survival Tips for Casual Dining at www.finediningpodcast.com!   Send in your P.F. Chang's stories at [e-mail].   Follow the show on TikTok and Instagram @finediningpodcast Follow Andres on Instagram @andressimonian   Let me know where I should go next by leaving us a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, PodcastAddict, Overcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I read every one!   Next week on "Fine" Dining: P.F. Chang's History [Part Two]! Andres is back, and if you picked up on his not-so-subtle hints in this first part, he didn't love P.F. Chang's. Hear our review and see what's salvageable! Ever work at P.F. Chang's? Send your stories to [e-mail].

From this point forward, the word cheese will be bleeped because Michael finds it offensive. Hello and welcome back to the Fine Dining Podcast, the search for the most mediocre restaurant in America. I'm your host Michael Ornelas and this show is, you know, as mediocre as the restaurants I'm trying to go to. I'm trying to find the perfect five point double zero dining experience out of ten. Why am I doing it? Because, you know, people say something's good, something's bad. But what's right in the middle that, you know, where does good become bad? I want to know.

So I'm searching out all the chain restaurants that I grew up with. I love these places, but just objectively speaking, they're not great. They're not like top tier food, but I like them and I wanted to go to them and give them an honest review. This week I am joined by a friend of mine, actor, struggling like A, B, like approaching Z list actor. Y. You're a Y list actor?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm not that low. I'm down there though. His name is Andres Simonian. Hey, how you doing? I'm swell. How are you? Did I say your name? Okay? Yeah, you're like I anyone who has a name that's not Common in a minute. No, not in American English. Are you saying I'm not American? I'm I'm not my? I'm... I'm not... I'll show you my passport, you piece of shit. I'm not inclined, or no, I am inclined to try and pronounce it...

I get it, you're fucking white. ...the way it's... I'm a quarter Mexican. You're not allowed to say that as like an excuse. All right, we're off to a hot start. Andreas, thanks for coming on to the Fun Dining Podcast. Thanks for having me. Where's the fucking food?

There actually is food. I know, I was saying it as a joke. Andres, thanks for coming on to the Fun Dining Podcast. Where's the fucking food? There actually is food. I know, I was thinking as a joke, it's like, oh, are we gonna eat on the podcast, but you actually have food, so I fucked up my joke. But we went to P.F. Chang's last night. Fire, as the kids say. Fire, as the kids say.

We were actually talking about what kids say. And what we came to was mid, which is actually what it was. Which is kind of the theme of this podcast. Pretty mid, yeah. So very, very appropriate. Anyways, we're gonna dive on into the podcast. Our table isn't ready until next week

because this is a two-part review. This week we're gonna cover the history and Yelp reviews of P.F. Chang's. Next week we'll talk about what we thought of the place, but in the meantime, let's hear a theme song. Your table is ready, follow me. Have you tried our chicken breast? Serving pancakes and ribs, I recommend the spaghetti.

We're here to satisfy, not to impress. Your table is ready, complimentary butter and bread. These walls have growth signs. Knick-knack cowboy hat, good luck cat, autographed guitar. Some grab-a-muse stuff, we're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it.

We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. We're gonna do bread. These walls have growth signs. Knit-knack cowboy hat, good luck cat, autographed guitar, some crap from your city.

Behold the tchotchke of mediocrity. Fine dining. Just fine dining, fine dining. Two letters on the sign are shining. Neon flickering, irregular timing. Identify the parking lot, so already it's at a three. You messaged me saying there was unexpected traffic. I'm sorry, it was 6 p.m. on a Friday in Los Angeles. It's unexpected for you to encounter traffic?

The unexpected thing in LA is to not encounter traffic. I didn't expect to put in my GPS and find traffic, so it was unexpected for me. How? I got on the highway and I was like, oh, there's traffic, I didn't expect that. How long have you been in LA? Two years. That's long I was like, oh there's traffic. I didn't expect that in LA Two years that's long enough to know that there's always traffic. I mean, this is my first time in Burbank

The is that actually true? No, I would believe it No, I it's just my excuse for everything. Yeah, because that you believe in in LA And LA is a great excuse. I don't believe that it's unexpected. Okay, fine Your student then I'd be unexpected, you're stu- Then I'd be like, you know that, leave earlier. Dude it was like a 50 minute drive to the stupid fucking BFJanks. Just don't use the word unexpected.

I'm okay if you're late, but like own it and don't like blame a thing. You're right. I don't trust you. This is why I'm a wireless actor. Can I talk about my favorite credit of yours? Sure. You're one of like the Wendy's guys. I'm one of the Wendy's guys.

In like the Spanish speaking market, right? In the Spanish markets. Like all the current Wendy's commercial campaign. I'm like, hola, compra el nuevo Frosty de Fresa. That's what I do. Nah, not in that voice. You have the visor on? Oh, the whole get up.

Yeah. As a Wendy's guy. Do you like Wendy's? Hell yeah. Are you? Like sweating? Let's zoom in on his face. By the way.

I fucking love it. You can't watch these shows. We're on YouTube. We've been on YouTube since February, so. Yeah. Do you wanna, look, regardless of if you want to, I'm gonna ask and you're gonna say yes. Do you wanna learn about the history of P.F. Chang's?

Yeah, yes. Jesus Christ. So much, yes. All right, well we're gonna jump on into this week's Eat Deets. Jesus Christ. Eat Deets. Eat Deets. Eat Deets.

Eatery details. According to its website, the story begins in the early 1960s when co-founder Philip Chiang, not buying it already, stepped in to help run the family restaurant called the Mandarin Restaurant, opened by his chef mother, Cecilia Chiang. Not buying it already. Stepped in to help run the family restaurant called the Mandarin restaurant opened by his chef mother, Cecilia Chiang. Wait, wait, wait. So there was a guy named Chiang. Chiang. Chiang. C-H-I-A-N-G.

Wait, so they removed the I? We'll get there. Oh, wow. See, the history's interesting. It's so crazy. After running his mother's restaurant for a while, Chiang opened his own restaurant, the Mandarret where he met fellow restaurateur Paul Fleming. Have you ever heard of Fleming steakhouse?

No. Well, but there's always a white guy involved here. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Always. The two eventually struck up a partnership and founded PF.F. Chang's opening in 1993. So P.F. stands for Paul Fleming Chang.

Oh. You get it. Yeah. This is like changing my life. So P.F. has nothing to do with the Asian side of the cuisine. It's P.F. Paul Fleming Chang, which isn't even the guy's name. It's just an identity crisis all around.

It's a white guy's name and a whitewashed version of a Chinese guy's name. Yeah. P.F. Chang's is the first internationally recognized multi-unit Asian culinary brand to honor and celebrate wok cooking as the center of the guest experience. Is it really the first? Look, it's on their website. On their website or Wikipedia? This is on their website.

Oh, okay. So it's highly biased. So it has to be or Wikipedia. This is on their website. Okay, so It has to be oh You believed it you just believe it Why would any corporation lie to me? Why would PF and Chang lie to me? Yeah, why would they lie? They're already lying in the name know cuz they remove they took out the fucking eye. Wait, so they first walk centered? The first internationally recognized multi-unit Asian culinary brand to honor and celebrate walk cooking as the center of the guest experience. So they have so many outs there internationally.

There could be a national one that beat them to it. Multi-unit, there could be a one off restaurant that beat them to it. Center of the guest experience. There could be places that do it, but it's like not the focus so like They've got out So specific and highly niche. Yeah. Yeah. I like dissociated while you were saying all those I could see your soul leave your body. Yeah, I was like what the fuck you were like behind the eyes I was like what?

What are they? Like when they say the first Presbyterian Church of, and there's like 12 of the first Presbyterian Churches. They're all the first. I think PFJangs is my church. Does that make any sense? Can you, look, we're gonna divert here.

Just say a prayer that is in To PFJangs? How do you worship at the church of PFJ? Let's see dear Paul Fleming and Mr. Chiang Thank you for the hold your hands up in frame if you're gonna do prayer hands. Thank you. Thank you for the first walk multinational multi-hyphen multi

More than one store place with walk It's basically like it's like the restaurant equivalent of an egot Yeah, they're the the Pharrell of restaurants, it's finish your prayer. I sorry I didn't mean to interrupt your worship a man Pf Chang's has more than 300 restaurants in 20 plus countries and US airports, including a growing number of convenient PF Chang's to-go locations offering takeout and delivery. Whoa, so just the same thing, but even lower quality. You get it. Sweet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anytime a place is like, oh, we want an airport version,

I'm like, you're just a sad Yeah, yeah a pale shadow of can you imagine eating pfjangs and then getting on a plane? I'm gonna be honest. Look my body has become like an iron trash can Yeah, like, you know when you go hiking and there's those like locked trash cans to keep bears out and it's like right And it's those like locked trash cans to keep bears out and it's like right and it's like a steel trap That's been my body through the course of this this podcast nothing comes out. It's just like it's Protected it's just a cumulate and then once you smell like and then once a week a trash guy comes in like Removes it totally this is the first time I think in the entire run of the podcast where I chat right after I really know

But I did feel like I couldn't go to sleep for four hours. Yeah after yeah, I was like I need some time To myself I need to come down either. Yeah. Yeah All right. Here's also from their website 25 things you didn't know about pf change. I'm not gonna read all 25. This is fun facts I'm sure I don't know like a thousand things I'm taking this so we were actually doing this to do less sampling the first pf Chang's opened on July 20th 1993 in Scottsdale, Arizona Wasn't it 1960? No, it's 1993. Didn't you say 1960?

He begins in the 1960s when the founder stepped in to help run the Mandarin restaurant in the 60s. The Mandarin. Is that one still going? I wanna go to that one. I don't know. I didn't research the Mandarin. Why not?

It's way more interesting. Please hold. Let me go to my computer and spend an hour putting together. And then there's the Mandarrettes. Yeah. We should go to those two. No. P.F. Chang's food is made from scratch, every day, And red yeah, we should go to those two No Pf change food is made from scratch every day in every kitchen. They're not like other chain restaurants

They'd like to say there are so many places that like Cheddar's scratch kitchen is literally a Scrap a bunch of these places make stuff from scratch. That's it. Just do they like slaughter the cow right? It means like nothing's prepackaged. Oh. Everything's made from scratch. Are most restaurants prepackaged? A lot of chains. Oh my God.

But there's also, like, it's not that big of a claim to say you're from scratch, I think. Because everything is from scratch? A lot of restaurants do from scratch. A lot of them do prepackaged. I'm just saying. This is actually new information to me. I don't think P.f. Chang's stands out

Substantially by being from scratch. It is a plus their food tasted prepackaged It did not taste from scratch. All right. Sorry, mr. Chiang Paul Fleming you can fuck yourself. I don't know who you are. Damn. I don't like the way he's such a philanthropist He's done so much good. I have a full page on just the philanthropy isn't he the guy who wrote James Bond I actually don't that's Ian Fleming Thanks for James. Can you imagine what a hyphenate that that would be the true EGOT I wrote James Bond and made Fleming's fake house and I'm half of I'm the PF of PFK. Hell yeah, dude. Yeah We need one more achievement for his EGOT. Yeah

created a religion Religion of P. Pia Changs. The mother of the co-founder, Philip Chiang, is credited with being the first to bring traditional Chinese cuisine to America. Bullshit. In 1962, she opened the Mandarin in San Francisco, one of the first dining establishments of its kind.

One of the first, not the first. An interesting qualifier. This is on their website. In the 60s? That's how long it took. And in 2013, she was honored with the James Beard Foundation Lifetime Achievement Award. She deserves it, but I don't believe

that she brought Chinese food to America. Well, single-handedly. There was a lot of anti-Asian sentiment in the wake of World War II. And like the Korean War and Vietnam and all that. So like to like firmly establish a foothold on Asian cuisine in America probably didn't come until the 60s later than we think. What about like the 1800s?

That's a whole century. Look, I've been doing the history on a bunch of these restaurants and a lot of them didn't get established until like maybe the early to mid 1900s. Cheesecake Factory started in like the 70s. Whoa! I wish it would never have started. Hot takes. I hate Cheesecake Factory. Their number one menu item remains the same across the board.

Chang's lettuce wraps. And that's the one thing we didn't get. We ordered so many appetizers and on trail in your research I didn't do the research until after we went got it But I have solved this issue I went to pf Chang's this morning and picked up an order of lettuce wraps So we are going to try them right now. That's disgusting. I'm gonna warm them up. Look they haven't been out that long They're actually fairly fresh if I'm listening to a podcast and people start eating and just we're gonna get away from the mic

I'm gonna get away from the mic. I would say masticating Me in the eye while you say it Masticates so alright, I'm gonna go warm these up. I Think you just eat one piece of lettuce. You don't have to eat like a half a head of lettuce. Thank God for one bite. Just You don't have to eat like a half a head of lettuce. Oh, thank God. For one bite, just. Mm, not bad. So this is their most popular dish.

Can I get the paper towels? Just tear yourself off. Yeah. Let's see if this can save it. What, paper towel? Yeah, the paper towel can save this whole meal. I mean. No, I mean, let's see if this dish can save fucking pee of change

Here's the thing this doesn't affect the rating because it was not a part of our experience last night I was gonna say after our review they're gonna have to fucking close. I don't even know if that's true I'm making a mess. I don't know how to eat this You know, I like it But without the lettuce I was gonna say I feel like this thing would be way improved without the lettuce wrap part of it. The lettuce sucks. What's, what's in this chicken?

What is it like bits of potato? It's like some sort of like stir fries. Apple? I don't think so. Yeah, I think it's apple. I'm going to Google this. It's good, but it's not as good as Wendy's. Sesame oil, sesame oil, shiitake mushrooms, ground chicken, salt, yellow onion, garlic,

fresh ginger, soy sauce, sriracha, water chestnuts, matchstick, carrots, green onion, and romaine lettuce. Yeah, I'm straight up eating it without the lettuce. Yeah, I don't think the lettuce like makes this easier like they think it does. No, I hated it. Hey, are we allowed to talk about the lettuce wraps? Yeah, we just doubt. Yeah, what'd you think? I hated it. Hey, are we a lot to talk about the lettuce wraps? Yeah, we just doubt yeah, what do you think it was? Okay? Yeah, I can't believe it was their signature dish Well this fucking now we've had me and chan guys. They're they come up with scammers, dude

I want to try Cecilia's food. Yeah, I do too. Let's do a podcast on the road. Literally with you? No. Okay, fair enough. I'll fly there. I don't meet you there. Hey everyone. So I know I don't talk about it much on the podcast, but I think it's been mentioned before. I play Dungeons and Dragons every single week with the same group of like eight wonderful friends. And I started listening to a new podcast of a group of friends doing just that, playing Dungeons and Dragons and making a podcast out of it. It's called I Seduce the Dragon. Oh, provocative.

Well, that's because the cast of the show includes a famous porn star, a rocket scientist, a cowgirl and a mom. It's super funny. And you don't have to have played Dungeons and Dragons before. They actually have two versions of their episodes that come out, one of them for people who kind of know what they're listening to and then another that explains it a little bit extra for people. They call it Clippy's version, you know, a reference to the old Microsoft paperclip thing that would over explain things to you.

It's kind of like that. You're going to love the show. I seduced the dragon. I STD. I just realized it has STD in the name. That's funny. Although they're STIs now, but it also has STI. If you rescramble the letters and get

rid of the D, which given a porn star, you're never going to get rid of the D. Hey, okay, I seduced the dragon. Go check it out wherever you get your podcasts. You get to hear five grown women dunk on each other each week and do it with a good amount of heart. Like every D&D group, you're mixing sincerity and humor. Go check the show out. Here's the cover art so you know what to look for.

Their famous lettuce wraps are one of the most copied items in the restaurant industry. While many adaptations come close, nothing beats the original. Wait, wait, wait, they created this? Yes. They created a lettuce wrap? With this specific filling.

Dude, let's go burn it down. Let's go burn down that BF Chang's that we went to. Why is that your instinct? Are you okay? Are you hurting? Fuck them for creating a lettuce wrap. Fuck anybody who likes it. When you asked, can I swear I didn't expect to threaten people.

Good. So the name PF, you know, theF. Chang's is derived from those of Paul Fleming, P.F., and Philip Chiang, whose name was simplified to Chang. So this is where it's like you're Americanizing it. You've already made like a very... Whitewashing. You've already whitewashed your menu quite a bit. Yeah.

They did, right? And now literally you're like, Chiang is too complicated for the whites. The P.F. Chang's kitchen is centered around traditional wok cooking. When cooking with a traditional Chinese wok, an intense flame creates what's known as a wok hay or breath of wok. This is what gives the dishes their unique taste

and also makes them difficult to replicate. Are they breathing on it? They like finish the walk and then they go, ah, ah. They like polish the inside of it. Did Rollo do that to us? Yeah, Rollo or Waiter. Our very indifferent server.

Very melancholic and. Melancholic. He just seemed like detached. Yeah. And sad. He looked out of the window just a lot, just kind of staring into the the distance. I wish I worked at the Mandarin. You'll find a unique mural inside each

PF Chang's restaurant. No two are alike. We'll talk about the mural later. Okay. But I mean it wasn't that crazy but look we don't have that much content in the atmosphere. We gotta juice as much as we can. Baby Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley frequented their first Scottsdale location. Cool. PF Chang's was the first national chain to use sriracha. And now their restaurants go through over a hundred thousand bottles of the famous hot sauce every year. Jesus, that seems like a waste.

PF Chang's gives out more than 52 million fortune cookies per year. And we've got two of them right here. Another eating break. Our fates. Let's see what the what our destinies say. Let's see what our destinies say. What the stars. Listen to this Christmas? That actually sounded really nice. Hell yeah. Do you ever open it like a scroll and read it that way? I think that's what they're meant for but I broke mine. They put mine. It's not gonna happen mine ripped Yeah, it's bad luck for a thousand years. Oh

Look at this look at this This is actually Re relevant to the podcast. Yeah. Because it's about you. Your creative nature is admired by many. So thank you for admiring my creativity. I'm so glad you were talking because I literally put the thing in my mouth and just, just profusely drooled. And I like so much so that it made me sad.

I was like, I'm 35, this shouldn't be happening. You drooled just now? It stayed in my mouth, but it was just a big... Hmm. Yeah. Mine says many successes are coming my way. Mine said that kind of yesterday. I feel like they're all kind of the same shit.

Can you not? What? Shit on mine. Mine's unique. I'm gonna have success. Mine said you're gonna have a great opportunity coming soon. That's the same thing. That doesn't mean you'll capitalize on it. Mine implies success. Not on this podcast.

I've got follow throughs. Badoos. I know. Nailed it. They're... They're... I see you saving it in your mouth. I'm not. I'm just eating normally.

Go ahead. Go ahead. If this is normally you eat like an actual... I swallowed already. You so clearly did not. I swallowed it. Their kitchens use more than 36 million fresh green onions per year. I can't tell if that's like more than other restaurants or... 36 million?

Is that a lot? Compared to other restaurants? I don't know. If they make it a fact on their website, I'm going to assume... That that's big. That it's big. Sounds more wasteful than anything. It's not wasteful if people actually consume it.

Are you eating it? Kind of the opposite of wasteful. Sounds like a waste. The iconic horse statues found at the entrance of every PF Chang's weren't introduced until their third restaurant located in La Jolla, California. Oh. The horses stand guard as a symbol of strength.

You know what, I'm not gonna lie. They're very ominous. I didn't even notice them. Well, yeah, because you were late and I was like, come on, let's go inside. They're very ominous. I didn't even notice them. Well, yeah, because this is the first time you mentioned it. Because you were late and I was like, come on, let's go inside. You're right. You did rush me. You had your unexpected traffic. But I did ask for our finest table.

So you're welcome. You literally did. Your finest table for three, please. And she just put us in the most regular. And then she put us in a booth and was like, our finest table. This is it. Yeah, it was like, you're welcome. Yeah.

Dishes are meant to be enjoyed family style, which is totally how we ordered. And kind of a family it did. Um, to the point that you felt comfortable, like I'm your father asking me to open your fortune cookie for you. Yes. Yeah. Thanks dad. I, you're welcome.

So I thought that it worked here. I usually am just like, I find the thing I like and I just want that. And I don't want a smaller portion to have some of a thing that someone else wanted that I'm going to enjoy less. Like I want to order my food and eat it. But at a PF Chang's nothing's great. So I'm comfortable splitting everything. If there was a thing that I was like, this is my shit,

I would've hogged it. Yeah. But you didn't. I didn't. Because you don't like anything. I didn't love anything. Yeah. That's actually not true.

You got pretty violent with one of the dishes towards the end. Stay tuned. Because they make all their food from scratch, they can customize however you like it They have gluten-free diet friendly and allergy friendly dishes. I don't know what gluten is and first of all bread Well, I don't even know what bread is but I think that they're just straight up line Yugoslavia now I I think bread there. No, they know I'm from there

No, I think I think they're fucking lying, dude. I think don't give a shit about you. Why are you such a skeptic? You're a conspiracy theorist. You think the earth is flat. It is All right now we're away from the stuff on their website. Thank God in 2010 PF Chang's home menu was introduced in supermarkets So you can buy PF.F. Chang stuff and make the freezer aisle. I have done that. I have done that. Yeah.

In 2012, Chang's accepted an offer from private investment firm, Center Bridge Partners, in a deal valued at $1.1 billion. Whoa. So all these things that you're about to read are just them selling out constantly. Just selling out, selling out. Yes.

Why? What is their fucking interest, you know, why what do they money? Okay? 1.1 billion a lot of money. Good a good chunk of change. Yeah. Hope the Chiang's got it You too Khan Agra Foods incorporated acquired the PF Chang's home menu license from Unilever in August 2012 The parent company that owns Marie Callender's supermarket offerings and Slim Jim. Dude, that microwave food tastes even more like shit. It just does. You're such a blunt critic. I'm sorry. Wendy's is better.

Is that cash flowing out of your pocket? No, no, no, no, it's fine. Is that cash flowing out of your pocket? No, no, no, no, it's fine. In 2015, PF Chang's filed for bankruptcy for its Canadian division. Whoa, Canadians, you know what's up. You see through it. You know how to eat. You see through the veneer.

Yeah. They really do, they eat better than we do out here. Every country. Every other fucking country, yeah. In December 2017, Chang's announced that they would open a location in Shanghai during the first part of 2018, Chang's first location in China. They hated it. They were like, what is this American bullshit?

Oh, wait for it. In January 2019, Chang's announced it was in talks to be sold to Triartisan Capital Partners and Paulson & Company for approximately $700 million from its previous owner, Center Bridge Partners. So they took a loss. So they lost money. They took a loss. A lot of money. $700 million from its previous owner, Center Bridge Partner. So they took a loss. So they lost money. They took a loss. A lot of money. $400 million less. Wow. They had it for seven years.

Good. And they're like, take it off our head like a fire sale. Yeah, yeah. And they bought it for $1 billion? $1.1 billion, yeah. They were like, this is a winning chain. A winning chain, I think is what it's. Oh, that's good.

In January, 2020, Chang's announced its first PF Chang's to go, takeout only location will be in Chicago, Illinois. Chang's obtained more than $5 million in small business loans as part of the Paycheck Protection Program. Small business. I know, five million from the PPP. Pieces of shit. They didn't even need that five million I bet. Five million? What the fuck is that to P.F. Chang? You know? Nothing. Throw it in the walk. Throw it in the walk.

Let's breathe on it. Well it's like back in the day like you toss like a paperboy a nickel and you breathe on it and that's what they did. It's a real one. In 2014, information regarding credit card breaches, PF Chang confirmed that customer credit and debit card data had been stolen in a cybercrime attack on its stores. Wait, wait, wait. So like people would pay with their card and then. And hackers are like, I want that.

Well, yeah. And they're still around like as a business? Yeah. Happens all the time. Yeah. It's kind of a rite of passage. The company temporarily switched to a manual credit card imprinting system for all P.F. Chang's restaurants

in the United States due to the data breach. Manual? Like instead of like a digital system that takes your card, it's like. They write down each number in your fucking card. Yeah, they type it into a typewriter I wonder why they lost 400 million dollars on April 9th 2018 independent security researcher

Akshay Aksharmah whoa Demonstrated a security flaw in PF Chang's reward program Which enabled leakage of members information due to a poorly implemented API dude Dude, you want to know something funny? I had a friend, he had like a website who was like, dude, if whenever I want, I could just get like somebody's membership and get like, use their rewards, like their points off like some dark web website. Yeah. Off like a bunch of chains. And I think that's what that is. He did do it or?

Oh yeah, he was using it. He was like, Oh, you want to get some chilies? So someone who's like been waiting two months, like, honey, we're going to Chili's what that is. He did do it or? Oh yeah, he was using it. He was like, oh, you wanna get some chilies? Oh, and so someone who's been waiting two months like, use their rewards. Honey, we're going to Chili's for Valentine's. We're gonna use this reward. We spent $500 in the last year. Me and my high friends ate it. And then they go there, yeah.

Jeez. In 2012, two women took legal action against P.F. Chang's claiming they were sexually harassed on the job. The San Diego Union Tribune wrote that the woman said, they were subjected to offensive comments and conduct from the male kitchen staff at the restaurants, including jokes about sex, remarks about female workers' bodies,

and kissing and whistling noises aimed at female employees as they walked by. Jesus Christ. Basically straight out of a movie for ya like the 70s entering the 2010 2020s like that just started happening like across the board where they were like it started happening that people were getting no it Started happening that it was coming out like oh, yeah, you know what I mean like it finally got attention Yeah, finally like everyone's like, yeah every fucking work place do this

Yeah, and it's like every workplace was like that. Yeah, like so that's like a very normal thing Yeah, yeah, I think that that's terrible and pfchang should close down No, there's so many reasons why they should close down But that's uh, that is pretty shitty and I'm glad that they did they stop So pfchang's paid out nearly a million dollars in total to these women in 2014 only to be faced with more harassment claims a few months later. Of course. While the company was reluctant to comment P.F. Chang's insisted they were committed to providing a workplace free of any type of unlawful harassment or discrimination. That's what they gotta say.

Well, I'm sure it's not in their corporate handbook or even like Chiang. I doubt he's like I have to say this but I really want sexual harassment in my workplace. I mean you might you know you don't know Chiang. I want it but I can't do it. That was the whole premise of P.F. Chang's the whole point. The P.F. stands for sexual harassment. Preparatory fun. Anyway wait I think that uh, it's not even fun to whistle at somebody. Can we acknowledge that? Yeah, 1000% All right international locations PF jang's has many international locations, but so far have only expanded into one Asian country that's literally not true because there's China and Shanghai and

South Korea China there's Shanghai There's China and Shanghai and South Korea. There's China, there's Shanghai. The franchise has several restaurants in South Korea along with dozens more in Europe, the Middle East and South America. Isn't that hilarious that like an Asian restaurant is barely in Asia? Of course that's the case.

Yeah, cause it's fucking American shit. Part of the reason PF Chang's can't be found all over Asia could be because there simply isn't a demand for Americanized Chinese food Doi damn doi because their food is just so much better Yeah, like their actual food is better Yeah, the company announced their plans to market PF Chang's as an American bistro when expanding to China That's the fact that I think is very funny. Yeah, that says everything you need to know about PF Chang's. Like, oh, it's American food. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. This place PF Chang's. And over here, it's like the P it's Asian food. It's so American over there. They actually call it Paul Fleming Chang's. They're like really trying to highlight. Do they really?

No, they call it a Paul Fleming C. Yeah. Paul Fleming C. Instead of PF Chang's. I got it. You don't need to. And that'll do it Instead of P.F. Chang. I got it. You don't need to. And that'll do it for this week's Eat Dates. All right.

So we've covered the history of P.F. Chang's. We've got a review to give, but we're going to do that next week. We're going to spend the rest of this episode reading out some Yelp reviews. Do I have to sit here for a whole week? Yeah. Okay. You got nothing going on. You're on the Y list. What Do I have to sit here for a whole week? Yeah. Oh, okay. You got nothing going on. You're on the why list. What are you with bookings? Does Wendy's need you?

I was just gonna, because it's my mom's birthday, but. All right, well we're gonna head on into this week's Yelp from Strangers. We need a little Yelp, a little Yelp, a little Yelp from Strangers. A little Yelp from Strangers A one star, two star, three star, four, bye-yey So get a little Yelp, a little Yelp from Strangers A little Yelp, a little Yelp Give us those complaints while you literally whine and die Yelp! Alright, this is Yelp from Strangers, our segment where we turn to Yelp

and read out our favorite one, two, three, four and five star Yelp reviews from the very restaurant that we dined at. I can't wait. I love this. Andres, do you mind if I start us off? Go ahead. Five star review. I'm going to start us off with a five star review. This is from Kevin B from Fountain Valley, California, August 27th, 2023. Today, I was hanging out with my mom and brother

on a nice Sunday afternoon. It's already starting like a fucking short story. My mom treated us to P.F. Chang's at Sherman Oaks Galleria in the SFV. That's where we went. These are all from the one we went to. Oh, okay. Galeria in the SFV. That's where we went. These are all from the one we went to. Okay. I ordered the cut rib fried rice with an with a iced tea to drink. The cut fried

rice was really really good too. With some awesome sauces and taste to it. Nice place with a great view of the mall inside is that a What hold on to your water on dress what the fuck Wait, wait, read that sentence again. Nice place with a great view of the mall inside the mall inside all of us What the fuck First of all, no, it didn Second of all, the mall is not an inside mall. It's an outdoor mall. No, it's an outdoor mall. It makes no sense.

All right. This is where the review takes a turn because I want you to keep in mind, this is a five-star review. Yeah. Our waiter was Ron today. He was not a very good attentive waiter. He would not even check on us after we ordered our food. Our wait time was not long. He greeted us right away.

He didn't send our check or even offer us any more drinks. So the manager happened to catch him in the act. She asked us, were we okay or needed anything? We said no. We said thank you to her, but we're okay. She apologized for his behavior. That is why I am going to give the five stars. I forget the manager's name, but she sent us home with some extra fortune cookies.

And that made our day. So he put a five star view cause he got extra fortune. And he got bad service. And then the manager is probably hot. The server be giving bad server. I was like, Hey, back in the line with you, buddy. You guys want extra fortunes? They're all generic.

She was like, five stars for a good management. It was probably the same manager that came up to us. Maybe. It was 2023, so it may have had the same manager at that point. I would give five stars to her. Yeah, so that's five stars. Three star review.

So this is a three star review by a man named Blank B from Waimanolo, Hawaii. And he's got a photo of like David Lynch, it looks like. Kind of does. And then, okay, November 3rd, 2009. Okay, oh, it's 15 years ago almost. Yeah, a lot's changed. I genuinely, when you read this,

I want you to remember times are different now. Yeah, a lot. That's important for this review specifically. Yeah, back then the sexism was around. Yep. And it was allowed. Keep going. Okay.

Whenever I go out to lunch with my male coworkers, we usually end up at a place that kicks ass, but he wrote ass with like A and then two at symbols right at so I'm centering it kicked at at it kicked at at One of us typically gets on Yelp and we find a joint We've never tried before the boys are always game for trying something new yes Isn't this how you hang with your friends like this kind of talk? Yeah, boys and the male co-workers. The boys are always

game for trying something new. Yes. Sometimes we hit a clunker, but the adventure is half the fun. Warning. I'm putting on my male chauvinist pig hat. Chauvinist pig? Chauvinist pig hat. It's kind of, and then a parenthesis, it's kind of and then a parentheses. It's kind of a combination Stetson Ted Viking beer dispenser thing Sorry ladies No way David Lynch, what are you doing? This is not David Lynch. No, it's not we love you. This is genuinely my favorite director. She's dope

The other day we invited one of our female co-workers Already a red flag when he calls him females We invited one of our female co-workers to go along with us We had a new place all picked out, but she immediately started whining Damn it if we didn't let her change our lunch destination to P.f. Chang's typical women We didn't let her change our lunch destination at P.F. Chang's. Typical women. Everybody knows.

That typical women was me. That was your embellishment. That was me just embodying this guy. He's an actor. I got too into the role of this guy. Yeah. Everybody knows how I feel about chain restaurants. Do we all know?

Blank B. Everybody knows how I feel about chain restaurants. I was also pretty disappointed about ending up at P.F. Chang's, so I had them in my gun sights to begin with. Thus, my totally unbiased score for this place is a 2.5. Here's why. It's not a two, it's a three stars.

Well, you can't do half stars on Yelp. Okay, well I'm gladly clarified. Here's why. Number one, the friendly staff earns two of those stars. Well, you can't do half stars on Yelp. OK, well, I'm glad he clarified. Here's why. Number one, the friendly staff earns two of those stars. The waitress was on top of things and did a great job. Well, he's not sexist with the waitress, though. Probably because she was hot. Ah, yeah, that's probably the one.

OK, two, decent decor, clean dining room. Three, the food was OK, but nothing spectacular. I've certainly had better at many little family operated Chinese restaurants Well, yeah, I got the beef and broccoli and it wasn't very flavorful We had lettuce wraps for an appetizer and that didn't ring my bell in the taste department either. That's a great metaphor Ring my bell in the taste department When you have to clarify what department your bell was wrong you should immediately pick a different metaphor oh god number four the prices are a tad pricey and this is 2009 yeah when they were by today's standards

affordable fuck yeah anyway if I have if I have any say in the matter some certain little miss somebody isn't getting a repeat lunch invite. Damn. Hey, there's a reason why pirates didn't want a woman on board the ship. They'd be having a jolly old time and the next thing you know she'd be switching out the grog for some tasteless dainty cordial. Arrgh. He actually wrote that.

This is not you getting too far into the role. No, this is me wishing I didn't have this role Similarly a dude work lunch all in capital is no place for a female There I've gotten myself into enough trouble Jesus Christ, I guess P.F. Chang's would be an okay place to take your visiting in-laws for a decent unoffensive meal, but otherwise I Guess the the offensive thing here was everything else this guy said did he end on otherwise Was that the last word of his review otherwise ellipses? Otherwise what I don't know, yeah. Otherwise what?

Otherwise I guess it sucks and it's not sexist enough for him. Isn't it unreal that people are like, this is the digital paper trail I'm leaving behind. And I like how he admitted like, there, I've gotten myself into enough trouble with my- I put my male chauvinist pig hat on. Yeah, yeah, why would you do that? Don't put that hat on.

Maybe just write the review and then select all and delete and close your phone. Yeah, don't put that hat on. Maybe just write the review and then select all and delete and close your phone Yeah, don't post desktop computer. He put three stars mostly blaming it on a female co-worker Yeah, so it's all her fault that they went to P of Chang's. Yeah. Yeah, this is why I don't have a girlfriend cuz that's what they do That's why I don't have a girlfriend, because that's what they do. And that's why I won when I was a pirate. So stupid. You can go download our full Yelp from Strangers segment at our Patreon. The link for that is in the description of this episode, or you can go to

patreon.com slash fine dining podcast. And we're now offering a one week free trial. So what do you have to lose? Go check it out. People have wild opinions and we get to read. Oh, so many of them Thanks. All right. Well, that'll do it for yelp from strangers. That'll do it for eat deets We've got a review next week. So stick around Andreas. You'll be sitting here for one week's time

Thanks for coming on the fine dining podcast didn't have anything else to do. I know Is there anywhere like socials you want people to follow you? Do you want anything to plug? Stay away from me. I'm just kidding. No, you can find me at Instagram, undressimmonian. It's just like acting shit. And yeah, undressimmonian.com. I have a website that I haven't updated in like a year.

And there'll be clips from this podcast on there. Hell yeah. Yeah. Do I have to do that? Yes. You literally have to. There will be clips from this I'm contractually obligated to put clips from the podcast

You actually have to devote your Instagram to business. Is this union is this sag? I? Actually do have as long as the episode budget is under $20,000 technically I am sag great So how much are you paying me? That's negotiable between me and the performance Let's negotiate on camera Make an offer and I'll give you a counter offer of nothing. I offered to pay for your meal and you were like no No, no, it was disgusting No, but yeah, no, I I bet that I'm gonna get fired from Wendy's

Anyway, let's keep going Well, we're just gonna sit here for a week just waiting on our table. The step is done and we had some fun. Now we're waiting on our table, waiting on our table. Join us next time we're stuck in line. Waiting on our table, waiting on our table. We're so hungry, tummy's grumbling. Waiting on our table, waiting on our table We're so hungry, tummy's grumbling Waiting on our table, waiting on our table

We gotta continue our search for mediocrity Yeah Waiting on our table, waiting on our table We'll be waiting and dissipating Waiting on our table, waiting on our table We're shrinking in this week, we're digging in Cause we're waiting on our table, waiting on our table We've got an appetite, but just sit tight

Cause we're waiting on our table, waiting on our table Search will continue when we see you next week But I know that we gonna wash Waiting on our table, waiting on our table, waiting on our table, waiting on our table, waiting on our table, waiting on our table Have a fine day!