Fine Dining - Strip Club Eats feat. Ryan Keely & Dana Scarborough [Episode 69 Special Part One]

Episode Date: November 20, 2024

My 69th Restaurant! Nice! Note: One of the mics wasn't working properly. It should sound fine, but Dana is a little quieter than I would've liked. Apologies in advance. Sam's Hofbrau is a strip club in Los Angeles that serves food, and I went with adult film star Ryan Keely and Dana Scarborough of the I Seduce the Dragon podcast to celebrate the 69th restaurant review on the main feed of the podcast! The history of serving food at strip clubs How to run your strip club kitchen Tales from the road as Ryan has been a featured dancer all over the country The pole dancer's high heeled pump is considered an athletic shoe? Dana &  passionately disagree with Ryan on the merits of fruit as "dessert" A Yelper gets chased out of the club! "Fine" Dining is now on video! Head on over to my YouTube to watch this episode! Music by: James McEnelly (@Ramshackle_Music) Theme Song by: Gabe Alvarez (@spooky.gabe) Segment Transitions Voiced by: Sandy Rose "Fine" Dining is on Patreon! Get an extra episode every month (My October Patreon exclusive episode about Mr. Chow came out on Halloween! Go check out the episode about a place that is expensive for expensive's sake), extended Yelp from Strangers segments every other week, merch discounts, download access to our music including the 7 singles from our Olive Garden musical, and more! Patreon Producers: Joyce Van, & Sue Ornelas   Get the 5 Survival Tips for Casual Dining at www.finediningpodcast.com!   Send in your strip club food stories at [e-mail].   Follow the show on TikTok and Instagram @finediningpodcast Follow I Seduce the Dragon on Instagram @istdpod Follow Ryan Keely @ryankeelytm Follow Dana Scarborough @danajeanxoxo   Let me know where I should go next by leaving us a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, PodcastAddict, Overcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I read every one!   Next week on "Fine" Dining: Strip Club Food Review [Part Two]! Ryan Keely & Dana Scarborough are back to break down what it's like to eat at a place where the food is secondary. Ever work at a strip club? Send your stories to [e-mail].

Hello and welcome to the Fine Dining Podcast, the search for the most mediocre restaurant in America. I am your host, Michael Ornelas, and I am back with a milestone I have been waiting forever for, episode 69. Nice. Restaurant, yeah. You have to say it after every 69.

Nice. Nice. This is the 69th restaurant I've done for the proper show. We're not gonna count all the Patreon stuff, but I am continuing with no nut November. I didn't eat any nuts at the restaurant that I went to this whole month. And this week I went to Sam's Hoff Braw, which is basically a strip club.

I wanted to do- It's Sam's Hoff Braw. Is it Hoff Braw? Wait, Hoff Braw? Yeah, Braw. That's how you pronounce it. I've been saying- It's Sam's Hoffbra. Is it Hoffbra? Hoffbra? Yeah, bra. That's how you pronounce it. I've been saying bra. Hoffbra. Alright. I went to Sam's Hoffbra. I mean, we can check the internet, but I'm... I've been saying bra. It's, I think I'm... R-A-U. Bra. It's like bra. German. Hoffbra. Hoffa! Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, I think you're right. I don't speak German. Hothbraa! But I am joined this week by two fantastic guests.

They're from the I Seduce the Dragon podcast, an all-woman cast D&D podcast. We've got the voice of Erastus Brainerd the 12th, Ryan Keely, you might recognize her from all the search history that you've deleted. She is an adult film star and her fellow D&D campaign member, Dana Scarborough plays Gentry Rose, Bitter Creek Dumont.

It's hyphenated. I tried to remember the names as best as I could. I'm very proud of you. That's great. I've been playing for three years, and I still get it wrong half the time. So this is a part one episode. We are going to cover the history of eating at strip clubs,

as best as I could find, and Sam's Hofbra in particular. And then we'll read some select Yelp reviews. And then next week, we will cover our review, our thoughts, the happenings of what went down inside of this strip club. So without further ado, let's play the intro song and we'll get to it. Wouldn't you like to try a five? Guarantee it'll be the perfect five. Fine tiny.

Better than you thought, worse than you hoped. Fine tiny. We don't treat mediocre as a joke. Breaking every single place we've been. Looking for the perfect five out of ten. Before we jump into the history of Sam's and eating at strip clubs, what's your history with not just being at strip clubs, but eating at strip clubs? I thought I was supposed to keep it clean for the first five minutes of the podcast.

Eating their food. I mean, I feel like food and strip clubs always go together because frequently when you end up at a strip club, even if the place doesn't serve food, either before or after, you're going to want a snack, because you may have been drinking. And you might need something to soak up a little bit of the grease and shame. And I have always loved being an LA person. I've always loved getting a bacon wrapped hot dog

outside of a strip club. That is just like those little cart vendors. I actually did not know that Sam's Hoff bra, which I have been going to since I mean, for years and years and years. I didn't even know that they served food. I was like, why is this strip club shoved inside this Chili's? I had no idea they had food there because I always purchased from the hot dog vendor outside. And I feel like I have been robbed. You missed out. I've been lied to.

Yeah. And it wasn't something that I would assume existed there, but I have many stories about eating at strip clubs, including one time there was a Thanksgiving meal that I had at a strip club. I have many stories about eating at strip clubs, including one time there was a Thanksgiving meal that I had at a strip club. Like straight up turkey stuffing, potatoes, like. The whole spread.

Wow. Yeah. Was it good? Yeah. That's awesome. So, and then I used to eat regularly at the Penthouse Club in New York. Food and strip clubs have always gone together

because the dancers that are working there are usually pulling like 12 hour shifts. So even if they're not serving food, there is definitely some like Doritos and like French fries in the grant. Yeah, in the locker room. What I found funny, one, you're the one who suggested Sam's for the food

when we were trying to figure out which strip club to go to. I was just thinking of what has food in LA. Yeah, the main strip club I wanted to do was called Plan B just cause the name made me laugh. Not a strip club to go to. I was just thinking of what has food in LA. Yeah. The main strip club I wanted to do was called Plan B, just because the name made me laugh. It's not a strip club. Is it not? No.

It's a bikini bar. This was this not a bikini bar? Oh, no, because they take their tops off. They do take their tops off. That's why the stage is built the way that it's built. At Sam's? Because of, at Sam's, I actually forgot to point this out to you. And because we were there for day shift,

there was not a lot of dancers on the stage. So at the tip rail around the stage, they still need to maintain the bikini bar, but they have that center stage that's very deep in. And that is far enough away from the patrons that they can go topless there, which is why it's one of the only strip clubs in Los Angeles that does have nipples and beer.

Amazing. Well, we'll get into more of like what actually, strip clubs in Los Angeles that does have nipples and beer. Amazing. Well, we'll get into more of what actually, what we saw, what we didn't see in next week's episode. But the specificity of what makes a strip club in Los Angeles. It's not a strip club if I'm not seeing nipples, I'm sorry. That's where I draw the line.

I can go to any club and see go-go dancers. I'm not taking it off. It's not a strip club. And Dana, have you eaten at many strip clubs? This was my first time enjoying a meal. Well, we made history for you eating at a strip club for the first time. Thank you.

Now I'm gonna cover the history of Sam's Hoff Bra and just strip club eats in general. You did a book report. I did a book report, essentially. I love this. Uh, so we're gonna- Where's your diorama? We're gonna-

Oh! Let me go grab the shoe box. Uh, so I'm gonna jump into this week's Eat Deets. Eat Deets. Eat Deets. Eatery details. First, a bit about Sam's. Courtesy of TimeOut.com, part restaurant, part sports bar, and all strip club, Sam's

keeps a diverse crowd happy with their stacked lineup of dancers. On any given night, we went during the day, there are 25-60 dancers with upwards of 13 gracing the stage at a time. However, make no mistake, the ladies of Sam's Hoffbrow aren't the most athletic. This is from timeout.com. I didn't write this. When it comes to the poll. Oh my gosh, I take umbrage.

When was this article written? I would like to fight this journalist. They were saying that there was an average of 15 to 20 dancers. Oh, at the, when we were there? Today, yeah. Hey, pandemic, get people hard. Journalists, they were saying that there was an average of 15 to 20 dancers. Oh, at the, when we were there? Today, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Hey, pandemic, get people hard.

I did some investigative journalism this afternoon. You did, you put on like a little fedora with like a little notepad sticking in it. You embedded. Yeah. But usually a dancer will take the stage and just saunter about. Sam's dancers are known in the LA strip club scene

as having some of the fattest asses in town. That is true. The club has been featured in several music videos and movies, including Jackie Brown and Kill Bill 2. There was a picture on the wall behind us of Quentin Tarantino. So, with people at the bar, not just like a random shrine to Tarantino.

Well, and if we had gone in the evening, you would see why. It is the home of the barefoot table dance. And we all know how Tarantino feels about bare feet. Is that true? Yes. So this is like a foot club. It's not by accidental design.

It is a foot club. Okay. It's not what they're pushing, but it's what's happening. Yes. Okay, so they're barefoot on the... So in the evening, when it's more packed, there isn't enough space for the girls to give lap dances because they do not have a separate lap dance area.

So in order for the girls to continue to make money when they're not on stage, because only so many girls can be on stage at a time, because it serves food, there's booths with tables. And so the girls will climb up onto the tables, and a lot of them don't want to do that in their six inch stripper heels. Dangerous.

So they'll get barefoot and they'll dance on the table, which is right in front of your face. Yeah. And if you like- Your feet are. Someone standing on a table feels less like a sexy dance and more like a river dance or a j- It's hot.

Yeah? It's really hot. Think C- It's hot. Yeah? It's really hot. Think Coyote Ugly. Yeah. I haven't seen it. Oh, it's fun. You should see it.

I mean, I- I remember seeing like the trailer on TV when I was like 12 and kind of had like an awakening, but I never saw the movie. I think it's very much a party atmosphere. Like you're feeling like, I've danced on the bar at Coyote Ugly like any Vegas tourist does with their mom.

Yeah. With their mom? That's part of the day in Florida experience? My mom made me dance on the bar at Coyote Ugly. She made you? Wow. She dragged me in and was like. Tell me about your mom. She's really cute.

Shelly is super fun. That's not the first time you've asked that today. You just want to know about moms. I mean, she used to be America's, I mean, she still is, but you're just not branding yourself as much as America's favorite stepmom. So. I mean, here's the thing. Before I was America's favorite stepmom,

I was a danger to your wife and daughters. Oh, wow. Fair. Hide your girlfriend, to your wife and daughters. Hi to your girlfriend, hi to your wife. Yes, fair. Anyway. So Shelly's a good time. Shelly's a good time, yeah. But yeah, I think it's right there. And those were sturdy tables.

They were very sturdy tables. And what I like about the table dance is that, A, it's nice because they also used to have pitchers of beer, so it was a very convivial atmosphere. With a picture of beer, couple girls up on the table, and it's not the awkwardness of a lap dance because they're dancing in front of you, so they're still very close to you. You're not getting licked on the back?

I'm sure it still happens. But they, but you're still getting like ass and titties in your face, but it's not like, you're not getting the crotch grind. So in a way I find it more enjoyable. And yeah, and I feel like it also takes away some of the awkwardness of, can I get a one-on-one lap dance with you?

This is like, can our table partake of this fun, shared experience? Enjoy these beautiful women and celebrate them. Yeah. So Every Day is special at Sam's. Here's the weekly rundown. Oh my gosh, what? They have Marijuana Mondays.

They have Sam's on a Tuesday, which probably could have come back to that one. Sam's on a Tuesday? That's just what they theme it. It's just called Sam's on a Tuesday. Is it Merrill, like Meryl Streep? Or Mer? Marijuana.

Marijuana Monday. I heard Marijuana, and I'm like, just Mer. Who's Meryl? Meryl on a Tuesday. Is it Merrill, like Meryl Streep or Meryl? Marijuana. Marijuana Monday. I heard Meryl wanna and I'm like, just Meryl. Who's Meryl? Meryl wants a Monday. And I was like, no, no, I was like, does Meryl Streep have her own theme strip club day and weed strain? Yeah.

Amazing. They've got Woman Crush Wednesday, Trap Thursdays, Freaky Fridays, Sexy Saturdays, and finally Supreme Sundays. Today was what? It was Sexy Saturdays, and finally supreme Sundays. Today was what? It was sexy Saturday. Today was sexy Saturday. But we went at noon.

Yeah. It was the sexiest noon I've had in a while. We have a long podcast to record after. Yeah. I can't be going out at night and then coming here at like one in the morning. You could have come here like four or five or something. It already is four or five. There was three dancers. There was three dancers.

Yeah, I know. I needed to see the rotation. And their score is going to suffer for it. I think I may have been the one. That was our mistake. I think I may have been the one nudging a lunch experience along because I like it. I blame both of you. I blame both of you. It's fair. You did not read my you. I blame both of you.

You did not read my writer. I'm going to be in my trailer. Now onto some general strip club factoids. It probably won't shock anyone to learn that erotic dance has been around for the entirety of human history. But the roots of the American strip club originated with burlesque theaters and vaudeville shows around the turn of the 20th century. Pole dances in the term stripper as we know them are even more recent, popularized in

around the 70s. Yeah, poles didn't start becoming really incorporated into the strip club until like, I want to say the late 80s, early 90s. And that's actually why you start seeing the change in the shape of dance shoes. Oh, interesting. Because they are, it's an athletic shoe, the way that they're designed. So you can use them as grip to climb the pole. Interesting.

And the way that you use them to wrap around the pole to spin, previously you'd see more of like a classic pump without the platform. And if you look at dancers, if you look at like the Girls, Girls, Girls video, you can see that their body movements are very different than what we now associate as like a club. I don't look at those shoes and think those shoes were built to help this.

Oh, no, those are the most comfortable high heels really. I want to try so cumbersome. Yeah, they are great. Actually, fun fact, Helen Mirren wears stripper shoes on the red carpet. Oh, for real? It has for years because it gives you the right posture.

Oh. And the way that they're designed is that these are women that are doing athletic feats, usually 10 to 12 hour shifts. And you wanna think if you're squatting to pick up dollar bills, you're doing all day squats, you're climbing the pole, you're literally just standing. This is what we trained in gym class for. So they are the most comfortable high heels out there.

They are an athletic shoe. You do, yeah, they are designed for the job. I love that, I had no idea. It's so interesting. So random fun fact, in industry parlance, the seats closest to the stage are commonly known as the pervert's row or sniffer's row. That's not true.

It's called the tip rail. I found it online. It has to be true. Wow, yeah. You can listen to the internet or ask a woman with lived experience. But what about the food? Well, alcohol has historically been a key feature

of adult entertainment for obvious reasons. And if you want people to sit around drinking and ogling for hours at a time, it only makes sense to offer some snacks too. At higher class burlesque joints in the mid 20th century, that might've taken the form of a solid full meal, dinner and a show, but most places would have offered bar snacks

like potato chips and peanuts and stuff like that. Yeah, and it was my understanding that at least up until Sam's Hoffbra, ha bra, Sam's Hoffbra, Hoffbra had its fire. Sam's offered a well-known prime rib dinner. You told me about that. And then we went in and I was like, that's what I'm going to get if they had it. And it was like a that's what I'm gonna get if they have it. Yeah, and it was like a meat and potatoes situation where you eat like a juicy chunk of,

I don't love prime ribs, so I probably wouldn't. I mean, I would have gotten it for the experience, but yeah, I have friends that like, and it was inexpensive and a lot of food and really well liked, but I think it's, ever since they had a fire there, I think it changed owners maybe. Oh, it's probably the kitchen burned too. Yeah. They don't have whatever you cook of prime ribbon. So nowadays strip clubs will try anything to bring in customers and stand out from the crowd. Buffets are a common enticement.

And some places have even tried hiring fancy chefs. But the industry standard is not very high to say the least. You did send me the sentence in an email, never trust a strip club kitchen. Yeah I was like I have been at many a strip club. I featured and danced all over the country which meant that I was the featured entertainer and I would go small towns big towns, small clubs big clubs, you know all levels of nudity. I've been to so many different strip clubs and a fair amount of them offer food. One of the many reasons for that is that depending on,

strip clubs are regulated per county and so there's no federal regulations on strip clubs and it's like liquor laws. They're very specific to each locale and some of them require them to serve a certain amount of food in order to have them again in places in Oregon you have to if you serve alcohol you have to serve food yes okay that's just part of it in order to have the license they have to have a certain level of food and whether that's hot food whatever that is yeah Yeah, gotcha.

I'm Shane. I'm Beau. We are your Kentucky Fried Critics. We're here to let you guys know about what we do here. This is our podcast. We like to watch movies, video games, comic books, TV shows, generally pop culture, art. No, no, no, no, not art. Maybe not art. Mostly just movies. Yeah, we like to pair it with an adult beverage.

Just come in, hang out with us, drink some beer, watch some movies, maybe pop some popcorn. We're going to have a great time here on Kentucky Fried Critics. We're just here to have a good time and talk about some great entertainment. So here's some advice on cooking for a strip club from Sam Irving, a professional high-end chef who made headlines by taking a job at a Vancouver strip club. Keep it simple, know that 99% of people didn't come to eat

or the 1%. Ha ha ha. Clean the kitchen, he said his club facilities were a nightmare before he took over. This seems like basic just how to run a kitchen. Yeah. Don't interfere with the show. Big meals and that kind of atmosphere can be awkward.

Stick to smaller portions and the kinds of food people tend to go for when drunk. High on fat content, low on complexity. That one I find interesting just because I do feel that the food we got kind of put up a wall of anyone that worked there seeing us until we were kind of done. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. Because we had these big baskets and plates and stuff like that.

Well, they knew that we were busy eating so we couldn't be getting dances. Right. They probably didn't want to be used as napkins. My hands were messy. They were messy. Yeah. They got the wings, so yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right. You chose the least clean thing to do. I mean, you chose a very typical barfing. Honestly, though, that's a solid choice. I feel like wings have always been a safe choice in strip clubbed kitchens. Because when I say never trust a strip club kitchen, it's because when they're staffing,

staffing the kitchen is never, that's the last thing that they worry about staffing. So that's most likely to have someone key missing and it's like, oh, we don't have food today or oh, we don't have whatever, or so and so isn't here till whatever time because it's not the oh, we don't have food today, or oh, we don't have whatever, or so-and-so isn't here till whatever time because it's not the focus of the business. So they may say, that's...

I was like, they actually have food at noon? I was so suspicious because there's been so many times that when I feature dance, I do three shows a day. So there'd be the afternoon show and then there'd be two evening shows. And so they'd say they'd feed me a day shift. Never a lunchtime thing. Yeah.

I was supposed to be there for a lunchtime thing. And I was supposed to be getting fed half the time. That was not the way. Yeah. No, I called in advance. I was like, is your kitchen open during every hour that you are open? And they said yes.

Yeah. I wonder if it's a local regulation. I don't think it is. I don't think they have to be. They're just committed. Yeah. I think that's how they get us there. Like what they...

Yeah, there were so many people there just for the food. All right. And NESP and Ocho? Yeah. Mm-hmm. With those tips in mind, let's take a look at some menus for some other strip clubs in the LA area

and see if they're following Irving's advice. The Four Play Gentlemen's Club, that's the number four, is a prime competitor of Sam's. They keep the menu simple, mostly offering sandwiches and salads. One inclusion that sticks in my craw is the fresh fruit listed under the dessert options. They just give you fruit and call it dessert, which is- That's very LA. There was fresh fruit on the menu today. On the breakfast, in the brunch section. Yeah. Yeah. They didn't have L.A. There was fresh fruit on the menu today. On the breakfast, in the brunch section.

Yeah. Yeah. They didn't have desserts. No. I would have loved to have something like a chocolate cake or something. What's wrong with cherry pie? She's my cherry pie. Do the whole song. No, that's it.

Okay. I consider cut fruit a dessert. It's a brunch item. We're different, you and I. I don't consider a cantaloupe that's nearly clear to me. We don't know the quality of the food that we're stewing. True. In Los Angeles, we have some of the best fresh cooked.

I love fruit. I'm not calling it a dessert. I just am not. Put it in a pie. Sure. Scream, guys. Put it in the pie. Sure. Scream this. No, you don't get to just leave and do your phone.

You don't get to just escape. You're wrong, and I might be Googling for the answer. I might be being pedantic. I think that it depends on the fruit. What? No. Yeah? No. Yeah. No.

A melon is never a dessert to me. That's just because you're a racist thing as melons. A berry. A strawberry dipped in chocolate is a dessert. A strawberry is not a dessert. I mean. Oh, in some cultures, it is a traditional dessert, like oranges in China.

So suck my dick. Yeah, it's just considering fruit dessert. I don't know. I'm kind of sugar junkie. I am. I am, yeah. Look at me. If I'm going to commit to a dessert, I want it to be gooey.

Yeah, I'm not well. Another LA joint, Damson Games Topless Sports Bar, has an even more limited menu. Basically burgers, wraps, and fries. Not far from where we were. You suggested that as a backup. That was a backup, not a real strip club. However, I did meet a dancer there who had previously been a princess at Disneyland.

Oh! Do you know how they have to like talk about that? Yes, they're a friend of Cinderella. I'm a friend of Cinderella. I'm not Cinderella. Yeah. I used to work with a friend of Ariel. Branding is dumb.

But the comments about Dames and Games food on Yelp are that the food is mostly mid, but I did find a review worth sharing. Someone wrote a three-star review. I went to this place for a birthday party and had a great time. It's not trashy and only one girl is topless at a time in the middle of the stage.

I didn't feel like it was skeezy at any time. The girls were very social and nice. The food isn't bad and it definitely isn't healthy, but only a girl would rate the food. It's bar food. I don't know what that means. I'm taking my boyfriend as a surprise soon if he's good. All right.

Yelp reviews for strip clubs are weird. They're one of my favorite things in the whole wide world. We'll get into them later. I've printed some out that we'll cover. But like, is taking your man to a strip club a common reward for good boy behavior? I think that's weird to be in a relationship that like, oh, I'm rewarding you. You've been a good boy.

I think going to it's going to a strip club is entertainment. It's dinner and show. It's drinks and a show. It's a fun night out. It's a sexualized environment, but it is not a sexual environment, because there's something adorable about a lap dance. It's like, I'm serious, it's the most PG thing that you can do with another person. Everyone's clothes stay on. It's like, go on a junior high dance, okay?

Yeah. And it's, I can tell you that none of those dancers are gonna go home with anyone at the end of the night. So I would rather, I wouldn't wanna take him. I would be like, go have fun, have a great time and come back and be stoked that I'm your rad girlfriend and you're feeling a little extra sassy and you're gonna give me a little extra juice.

Or let's go to strip club tonight because that's what we wanna do because that sounds fun for us. But a lot of times women with boyfriends at the strip club can be a turn off to dancers because they can get weird. I've had the handsiest experience I've had, customers have been female customers, because they were a woman, it was okay.

Yeah, they can cross some boundaries. Yeah. And so I generally try to avoid, I mean- Couples. Couples, yeah. And then there's like weird jealousies, like, oh, can you give us a double lap dance? I'm like, I don't know this broad. Yeah. I'm like, does she does she have a license to work at this club? Yeah

Double lap like two on one or one on two because that just feels like you're like splitting real estate Either way, I've done. Yeah, I've had both. I've had to do both I've had a double lap dance, but the guy paid double. Yeah for it and it but it was still it was like It's so awkward and it yeah it. But it was still, it was like one. It's so awkward. And it, yeah, I think it was fun, but it was, I think because it was like, the vibe was good. Yeah. Yeah.

And that was why it was fun. And also like very upfront about how this was like, we're paying for the fact that there are two people here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And not make it like a two for one special. Bear Elegance in Inglewood loves their steak. For $9.50, you can get a real steak sandwich with a choice cut ribeye. I would trust that. Sounds all right.

But wait until you hear how bad inflation has gotten. Check this review out all the way back from 2008. Someone on Yelp gave a four-star review June 20, 2008. I used to work at one of the big defense firms to the West on Imperial. One of the perks missing on the official welcome sheet was you get free lunchtime admission with your company badge. You have to sign your name, but I always signed it as the head of ethics or the CEO and they never cared to check. As with all strip clubs, there's a drink minimum, but with free admission, it was roughly half off. They had one dollar steak plus all you can see pink taco on Mondays.

Good review. If I recall correctly, they had a free buffet on Thursdays with your required drink purchase. Yeah. Yeah. Let me let me. A lot to unpack there. One dollar steak. I'm going to pull up the U.S. inflation calculator real fast and see. One lot to unpack there. One dollar a day. I'm going to run the, I'm going to pull up the US inflation calculator real fast and see- $1 from 08, what it would be. What it translates to. Because I am curious. Yeah. I also love that like a law firm with a deal for free admission to a strip club and signing

it as the head of ethics. Yeah. Yeah. 2008 was a different time. It very much was. It wasn't even that long ago. Yeah. What is it? That's not right.

Two million dollars. What? Let me run this again. What used to cost one dollar 15 years ago, 16 years ago is two grand today. That's not correct. What's it say? It's saying it's only $1.46, but that's not correct.

No, maybe, is it like, is it because we've allegedly lowered inflation? No, no, no, no, no, no. 40% inflation is a lot. Yeah. Not for that period of time. And let me check the Bureau of Labor Statistics. It might seem more impactful with the larger amount.

Maybe, yeah, because $1. a dollar and 46, I guess. Yeah. Anyway, continue on. All right, last up is the Spearmint Rhino. It's a bit of a drive in Las Vegas. It's the only strip club I've ever been to before, but it has to have the most extensive menu of any place we looked up for this episode.

They've got pizza, sandwiches, fried appetizers, and teriyaki bowls. They're also the only place with a proper dessert offering, apple pie. Kind of telling though is that Chef Chris marked his favorite food on the entire menu as the cheese pizza. So just...

Ew. Yeah. Nothing on it. Just cheese pizza. I mean, I do like a cheese pizza. Depends on the cheese pizza. Yeah. I gotta have meat.

I gotta have meat. I gotta have meat on my pizza. I wanna like pepperoni. We just found out you don't like cheese. That's true. That's true. So you've gotta have something on the pizza. Yeah.

Look, I eat. Just because there's an ingredient I don't like doesn't mean I don't eat. I clearly eat. I just feel like those people, I'm still not ready to hear the story. Most people who don't eat cheese would like to eat cheese. Yeah.

The fact that you're averse to it. Yeah. Are you on the spectrum? I actually took a test that says you might wanna look into it more. It was basically, it had like a.gov ending on the website. So it's like official. You can probably trust it.

That's like the magic 8 Ball equivalent of like, not conclusive. Yeah, trying again later. Yeah, try again later. I'm like autist-ish. Yeah. So also one guy on the Las Vegas Forum claimed that he saw a dancer eating an entire Snickers

bar on stage mid-performance at Spearman Eye. That's 100% real. I've seen girls eat cheeseburgers on stage. I have this shit. Like as part of the show or just they're, they happen to be doing it? Both. Yeah, I feel like both.

I mean that's performance art. It's adorable. In my opinion that's performance art. Okay. I mean it is. Yeah, that is performance art. I think if I saw a girl like, Dude I have some shit going day shift.

Showing down on a burger, it would be the most charming, cutest thing ever. Like, just sitting there with the shoes and like, oh, hot, it'd be so hot. Like the Carl's Jr. commercial, but like cuter, not like slow motion, just like cute. Definitely a performance. Yeah, it's a vibe.

Yeah. And then to end on a downer, in 2013, a man plowed his car into two guys in the Sam's Hoff Bra parking lot. The three of them had been having a drunken argument that escalated. Unfortunately, the two victims had to have their legs amputated.

Was it an escalate? Pfft. And that'll do it. For this week's Eat Deets. Okay. So we've covered the history of Sam's Hofbra and, you know, LA strip clubs a little bit and their relationship to food. We've got a review to give, but before we do that, that'll be next week. This week we gotta see what other people are saying about Sam's Hoff Bra

in this week's Yelp from Strangers. Yay! I love a good Yelp review. We need a little Yelp, a little Yelp, a little Yelp from Strangers. A one star, two star, three star, four or five. A little Yelp, a little Yelp from Strangers A one star, two star, three star, four or five So get a little Yelp, a little Yelp, a little Yelp from Strangers A little Yelp, a little Yelp

Give us those complaints while you literally white and die Yelp! Alright, this is Yelp from Strangers, our segment where we turn to Yelp and read out our favorite 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5-star Yelp reviews of the place that we went to. I love a cold read. Give me some juice. One-star review. Y'all don't mind, I'm gonna start us off with a one-star review. Okay.

This is from AJK from South Pasadena, California, September 8th, 2011, so 13 years ago. I never thought the day would come when I got chased out of a strip club by a stripper. Pfft. Pfft. Strong start. Pfft.

Pfft. Pfft. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. I am fairly new to the strip club scene.

Clearly! We have always hired private dancers for bachelor parties and whatnot, but I am new to going into the actual establishment. This place was recommended by a few buddies as a decent place to hang out and have a few drinks and see some dancers. So I decided to take a few buddies in

for some pre slash post wedding adventures, considering I live down the street and I have a hall pass. The dinks, I think he meant drinks, were cheap and reasonable, and the cover was free so I didn't expect much. But I was surprised to see that they had a few good looking women, and they were nice and cordial, so we hung out for a few hours. Until this woman got on stage right in front of us And let's just say she was not our type Why I can see how he gets chased out and so we started looking away and drinking our drinks and talking Well, this woman decided that we are not paying her enough attention. So she yells at us. Hey, you know, you love this big black ass and I'm gonna dance here. Anyway Then she shows us what looks to be herpes.

Oh no. They could have just been razor bumps, I guess, trying to be nice on her crotch, which turns away not just those of us sitting at the stage, but several tables sitting behind us. Then she looks at me and says, what, I'm not hot for you. And I tell her she's fine, just not my type.

And I look at the TV, praying she'll move on. She then comes off stage with her crotch and shoves it in my face. I immediately get up and leave for the restroom, at which point in time, several guys explain to me that she is the reason they are in the pisser. And then after I came out, my friends and I left. I called into Sam's after I came home

to inform them of this issue. And the manager on duty would not even let me know what the dancer's name was. Yeah, of course he isn't. Yeah. Initially, he said he only had two black dancers, pairs or Sunday, I don't know what that means, on duty. This guy's just racist and bad. Yeah.

Yeah. And obviously wasn't tipping, and she was like, yo, spend money or get the fuck out. But when I pressed to see who was on stage, only a few minutes prior, he went silent. I then asked if there was an owner I could speak to with possibly tomorrow, and then the phone went dead. It's sad because we had a great time prior to all this.

My buddies enjoyed the dances, I bought them, and we had some decent drinks. One star. I think that person went off bought them, and we had some decent drinks. One star. I think that that person went off the rails and none of that happened. As soon as I heard, I'm used to getting strippers in a bachelor. Yeah.

I was like, this guy doesn't know about the strip club. He doesn't know about the etiquette. Right. Also, it feels so clear that they left out some details. Like, they see... You're not getting that reaction out of someone without heckling them. Yes. Yeah.

Which, yeah. Yeah, and I am gonna, in my head, I'm gonna hear, as dinks, as in dual income, no kids. Yeah. They were cheap and reasonable. Yeah. Yeah, so that's AJK. A little racist and probably a little shitty.

I'm gonna need some more details, sir. This lacks honesty and veracity. Let's message him on help. Let's be like, hey, this isn't complete. Sir? Yeah. It says that he got chased out the club. It actually, when he clearly says they left.

It's like, those are two different things. Right. Because I have seen people get chased out the club and they are chased out the club. Right. Yeah, and not just, yeah. And not like, oh, this girl was mean to me, so we lost. Yeah.

Right. People, the takeaway is people on Yelp are the worst. I am the best. I love a strip club review. They're fun. I'm just surprised that you were able to get one, two, three, four, and five star reviews for a strip club review. They're fun. I'm just surprised that you were able to get one, two, three, four, and five star reviews for a strip club, because normally I feel like

there's ones and twos and fives. And that's it. This had a pretty decent spread. Yeah, this is a strong spread. As a strip club review connoisseur. Right. Four star review. This is from Kayla, I'm sorry,

Kyla D, nine months ago, lit, period,, lit, period. Bad bitches, period. Four stars since I didn't actually see no pussy. Not full nude. Would Def come back though? Amazing. That's all you need to know. That's all I need to know.

That's all I fucking need to know. I love it. I'd go back. Lit. Bad bitches. Didn't see no pussy. Four stars for no pussy. Yeah.

And like, Kyla D. Cute avatar. That's a really cute avatar. Cute avatar. Yeah. Yeah. I'm into it. I'm here for it.

That's a good palette cleanser. Let me see. Oh, oh, she has one more review that she's done. Oh, I love a follow-up review. And it's a, no, not of a different place. Of a different place. This is a place where you can do a review palate cleanser. Let me see. Oh, oh, she has one more review that she's done. Oh, I love a follow-up review. No, not of a different place.

This is a place that she has left a one-star review on. The Tamale Man. No! You've done two reviews, Sam's and the Tamale Man. If I could give it zero stars, I would. I went inside to ask for a napkin because my nose was running and it was freezing outside. The man behind the counter was extremely rude and made a hand, oh wow, oh wow.

Oh wow. Wow. It's really long. It's long, it's long. It's the Anna Karenina of a one star review. For a tamale. But at the tamale man, they do not give you napkins. And they don't show no pussy.

And they don't show no pussy. And they don't show no pussy. Did you like those reviews? You can get three more over on my Patreon. That's patreon.com slash fine dining podcast for the full Yelp from Strangers segment and an exclusive fine dining episode every single month. So that is our first part episode. We are going to wait one week and then we'll talk all about our experience at Sam's Hoff Bra,

the food, the atmosphere, all of it together. Thanks for listening. Thank you two for coming on. Yeah. Make sure you go check out I Seduce the Dragon. It's a D&D podcast. Please do. It's super fun.

I've listened to a few episodes and it's just, you guys have a delightful chemistry. It is not, if you don't like D&D podcasts, you'll like this one, cause it is not like any other D&D podcast out there. If you don't know how to play D&D. We even have Clippy episodes that will explain. Yeah. Yeah.

Do you want five women having a blast, enjoying friendship and adventure? Slumber party vibes. Yeah. Then check out her website. ISTDPOD.com. Yeah. Awesome.

Is there anything else y'all want to plug? No. This was super fun. Thank you. Awesome. Well, stick around one week. We're just going to be sitting here waiting on our table. But in the meantime, follow me on Instagram and TikTok

at FindDiningPodcast. Check out my Patreon, go to my website, all that good stuff, finediningpodcast.com. You know the drill, whatever. We'll see you in one week's time. Have a fine day. Waiting on our table, waiting on our table. The step is done and we had some fun. Now we're waiting on our table, waiting on our table. Join us next time we're stuck in line.

Waiting on our table, waiting on our table. We're so hungry, tummy's grumbling. Waiting on our table, waiting on a table We gotta continue our search for mediocrity Yeah Waiting on a table, waiting on a table We'll be waiting and dissipating Waiting on a table, waiting on a table We're shrinking in this week, we're digging in Good, we're waiting on a table, waiting on our table We're shrinking in this week, we're digging in

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