Football Daily - The Commentators’ View: UCL brain fog & Shrewsbury shame

Episode Date: January 31, 2025

John Murray, Ian Dennis and Alistair Bruce-Ball lift the lid on life as 5 Live commentators. They reflect on the table-watching drama of the final round of Champions League and Europa League games. There’s off-field controversy. Who will go top of the table in Clash of the Commentators? And Ali’s Shrewsbury story finally gets told.00:45 John’s trip to the dentist 04:00 Striking pre-match displays 07:30 All eyes on the table, not the match? 15:00 Man City/Celtic vs Bayern Munich/Real Madrid 18:30 Golden mic latest 21:00 Golf and games controversy 27:10 Who will go top in Clash of the Commentators? 34:55 The Shrewsbury story finally gets told 42:30 Most exciting January signings 47:15 The Great Glossary of Football CommentaryBBC Sounds / 5 Live Premier League commentaries this weekend: Sat 1 Feb 1500 Bournemouth v Liverpool, Sat 1 Feb 1730 Wolves v Aston Villa on 5 Sports Extra, Sun 2 Feb 1400 Man Utd v Crystal Palace, Sun 2 Feb 1400 Brentford v Tottenham on 5 Sports Extra, Sun 2 Feb 1630 Arsenal v Man City.

BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts. The Commentator's View with Alistair Bruce Ball, John Murray and Ian Dennis on the Football Daily. Hello, I'm Alistair Bruce Ball. This is the Commentator's View where we tell the tales you don't normally get to hear from us five live commentators joining me as usual on the podcast Ian Dennis and John Murray all of us fresh from an exciting week of European football Champions League and Europa League permutations plenty and I'm speaking to you from a foggy Bucharest this morning how are we chaps actually before we go into the football John must ask because we left it on a bit of a cliffhanger again last week your trip to the dentist all okay yeah I don't think we need to spend too long on that. It was a very, very quick check-up, and off I went.

And I've had to make a... Routine. It was very much routine, and I've also had to, because normally, this will be fascinating for listeners, normally I have the check-up and see the hygienist on the same day. And this is, if you remember rightly, this is the same hygist who once uh worked on the teeth of gareth southgate uh but unfortunately i've now got to go back so on another friday morning i in the in the in the near future i will also have to leave to go to the dentist so what about that yeah dental hygienist to the stars but when you make

your your television appearances john the teeth are going to look magnificent which is which is what it's all about ian how are you i'm very well this is the first by the way isn't it go on are we is this episode 10 and i know that we've been invited to present the uh the commentators guff as mark chapman called it in midweek but still however we've lured him we've lured him to listen haven't we i'm not too sure that we have when he claimed her chapman claimed on air that he was listening yeah but he told me last weekend he'd never listened to an episode so uh do you think that was show a showbiz well we'll have to wait and see we'll find out if he if he recalls this conversation but obviously we've been invited from to to th Thailand to present the the podcast and

Cyprus I think but you are the first to present overseas from Romania yeah really enjoyed the trip I have to say I don't know whether you chaps have been over here covered football here I came here just over 10 years ago with Chelsea and and did go to this uh arenaionale. But I tell you, I was doing my best to describe it last night. Really impressive footballing venue, which obviously they used for Euro 2020 as well, but Romania didn't qualify for the tournament. So I think that would have been quite something, them playing at home.

We also had a really good Romanian journalist on just before kickoff, telling us the whole story about FCSB as they're now called and and and have been for a little while and the dispute over the history of the the club Stoia Bucharest and this other club CSA Stoia Bucharesti who play under the original name and and and claim rights to the history of Stoia Bucharest and their European Cup win and and all that so um yeah really really I've really enjoyed the trip i have to say last time i was in romania i have been a few times over the years and for anyone who's going to

ceausescu's palace is is absolutely incredible last time i was there i was there with gary flint off our producer for the draw for the euros which then didn't happen um and so this was in december and it was a winter's day in December and Gary went early. I was on my own and I went out for a walk. I ended up in this military parade through the center of Bucharest and it was like some sort of Romanian national day and they had all of their military hardware

very much on show, I remember. The architecture here is stunning and there's a real sort of French feel to it as well. So I think when a lot of it was built... Don't they call it the Paris of the East? Paris of the East. And there's a roundabout with a sort of, you know, an imitation of the Arc de Triomphe.

The other thing I was going to say though, ahead of the game, and I know you chaps will have experienced this with your travels in European football, the pre-match displays nowadays, I know they've always been a thing but i think more and more ahead of these games uh in europe the tifo displays as they call them they are so striking they're brilliant to describe i love them to sort of kick off a game of european football aston villa had another impressive one at uh at villa park in uh in midweek and we're talking

about the french influence in Romania, do you know what thank you is in or how you would say thank you in Bucharest? Merci. Chabia.

Yeah. But you're right about the displays. The one in Paris ahead of PSG against Manchester City, that was like an opening

ceremony. Yeah. Well, last night, I don't know if you saw last night, but again, this was harking back to Stoia Bucharest's glorious past. So people remember that that team won the European Cup in a pretty awful final in the mid-80s. So they played for penalties from the start,

beat Barcelona in a penalty shootout, and the goalkeeper saved all four penalties. So the Tifo last night was this giant image of the goalkeeper with the European Cup in his right hand and his arm raised and his fist clenched. I heard you describe that and I did wonder, did you know that in advance? No. That was very good. Well, no, John, I tell you, there was a cheat there. And that's where, so our Romanian journalist friend had just finished broadcasting, but he was, he sort of, he was standing behind us. It started to,

to unfurl this banner and Paul Robinson, obviously he's sitting on my left-hand side. He tapped Paul on the shoulder and told me exactly who that was. Paul scribbled it down very quickly. And then I was able to sort of look at Paul's notes and describe it at the same time. So got away with it a little bit, but I mean,

that's a, that's a classic sort of take you behind the scenes, but it would have been really helpful to know before it came what was coming. That was the final of Wembley, wasn't it? That's right. Yeah. So he saved all four Barcelona penalties. And what made it more dramatic last night was the end that it went up in, away to our right, the ultras were all in black.

So you had thousands of fans just that just jet black but behind this image of the goalkeeper um it was yeah it was it was quite something but manchester united dealt with the whole thing manchester united that that is i think the best performance i've seen all round under reuben amarin they they were they were good last night from a commentator's view though with those those displays and those banners and posters and tifos before the match you did there by the way the commentator's view yeah well absolutely but very often we don't know what they're going to be do we and very very often they've got something written across them in a foreign language or sometimes even in latin and you're trying to work out what it is that's written across them and it's actually

become i think it's now become it's you know there was a point where i thought it was quite frustrating that you think oh what does that mean now it's actually become quite comedic yeah um just just going back to mark chapman very quickly um i i know he is listening to the podcast because he picked me up on last week us ahead of clash of the commentators and i said i was going to do my nicholas parsons bit from mr and mrs and he said it was derrick baity so that's the only text i got from him last week didn't even say listen to the pod enjoy the pod anything like that he just said derrick baity not nicholas parsons yeah right so there we are he's exposed himself as a listener he has yeah he Well, let's find out if he's listening again to this then.

Tell me about Wednesday night, chaps, because we've been building up to this quite a lot, you know, this season in terms of the permutations, the table, as it all played out. How did it go? podcast isn't it for commentators because all three of us have experienced something this week that i think specifically not like we've experienced before to have had our different experience you know i was at um manchester city club bruges you and obviously you were at villa park for the celtic visit and you had the same thing on thursday night and so what i found myself really reflecting on on the whole thing the whole, how it worked over the course of the last couple of days. And last night, I was listening to you, Ali, and it was my full intention to watch last night as well. But I started off, I was busy doing something else. I started off listening and then I was sort of drawn into the table.

So as a listener last night, I found watching the table so as a listener last night i found watching the table compelling and so i listened to you what watched the table virtually during the whole of the of the match and i thought i should be watching the football here i shouldn't be watching a table moving up and down it's like watching cfax well and and in terms of the commentary and it must have been the same for both of you you know i i was watching the table on on you know on my ipad as much as i was watching the game and there were definitely times where where paul robinson alongside me would spot a yellow card or something that happened because i'd missed it because i was scrolling up and down but also the other thing that sort of tickled me a little bit was the way it developed in the second half last

night is i was commentating on fCSB against Manchester United but we were waiting to hear whether Bodo Glimt might score another goal against Nice to get in front and knock Rangers out of the top eight so you then had the listeners you know who who cared hanging on this result in Nice between Nice and Bodo Glimt, which I quite enjoyed. Yeah, I mean, I did enjoy it. But on that very theme, the sort of commentary theme, I nearly missed John Stones scoring from a header because I was looking to see

what Dinamo Zagreb were doing against Milan. I was looking to see where they were in the table. Suddenly, I look up, John Stones is heading the ball across the goal. And what about Villa? Because their position fluctuated on the night, didn't it? That game as well, in front of you, went to and fro. Well, I calculated in the first half alone,

I think the top eight had changed probably about four or five times just in the first half. But I'd got the... I mean, the simplest scenario, I was focusing on Atalanta. But there were other scenarios involving Milan, Atletico Madrid. But the one that almost caught me out was Lille.

Because they were the teams ahead of Aston Villa. And Lille had gone and battered Feyenoord. And as a result of that five-goal swing, they'd actually then gone above Aston Villa. And luckily I'd spotted it because I hadn't made it I just simply had one screen and a sheet of paper with the permutations for every game of all 18 games I knew who was out who needed to have a chance at the top eight and what have you because I think there was there was something like Villa were one of eight sides who still had a one in two chance of getting into the top eight. Might have actually been more than that.

But Lille came from behind. And then all of a sudden I looked at the league table. And that's when I realized when Atalanta had got the second equalizer, that all of a sudden their destiny was out of their own hands for the first time in the night. And so when we were doing the commentary on Sports Extra, I was saying now, well, Villa can hang on to this, but a goal in Atalanta changes everything, or for Atalanta. So all of a sudden, there was a real sense of jeopardy

for those closing stages. Yeah, I really enjoyed it. It was a novelty experience. Yeah. And seeing how it worked like that for the first time. I actually hand-wrote a Europa League table down as well, just in case it sort of didn't work on that. The Wi-Fi actually in the stadium in Bucharest

was an absolute disaster. And luckily our engineer, Phil Zentner, plugged us into the hardwired internet, which was fine. But I'd actually hand-written an entire table with goal difference, goals scored, away goals scored, with everything hopefully covered. But just looking at it here Olympiacos came from 12th to get into the top eight with a with a win last night and FCSB who we were

commentating on actually dropped out of that of that top eight last night and they're going to face a playoff I know the listeners certainly enjoyed the two nights of football on Five Live and BBC Sounds because we've had an email here from Chris in Buckinghamshire. So the emails, please send them into TCV at BBC.co.uk. Chris in Buckinghamshire says, Dear TCV, can we revisit the commentary of John Murray and replay a dramatic slow search for the updated league table on the Champions League as Celtic scored their equaliser? It must only be comparable to the closing moments in a relegation scramble.

So, Chris, just for you, here it is. And Villa Park is stunned. Villa 2, Celtic 2. Well, that for Aston Villa means that with the scores as they are, they will drop down to 13th. They go to 13th. So Aston Villa now with that Celtic equaliser. Aston Villa drop out of the top eight.

You had three tables. You messed it to me. Why did you have three tables? There are three tables. Why did you have three tables? There are three tables because having covered matches during the course of this, I've been testing it as it goes along. But of course, we've been in different venues.

So I found in some venues, some tables are quicker than others. So I had the UEFA table. Gary, the producer, had the BBC table, which was very good, I say and we also Gary also conjured up another table I'm not even sure where that was from but he had another table as well but I found during the evenings that sometimes the UEFA table would be quicker than the BBC one but at other times it wasn't and the other thing I noticed was the score would come up a goal would come up on the uefa table but it wouldn't change

the table immediately it did take a little moment or two before the table would change so a little bit like in the old days of transfer deadline day when you'd have people with three phones there you are with three three screens yeah three screens and i think we had big we had a computer score we had a computer screen, we had the video printer as well on the laptop. Gary had the laptop up as well.

And the other thing we had on the go, and again, I know during the game it's not that much use because it's all going to change, but on the old

Europa League app, you could get up the draw, the potential draw as it stands. So Manchester United will play one of one, two, three, four,

which by the end of the night, obviously, is more relevant. But during the commentary it's a bit like, two, three, four, which by the end of the night, obviously is more relevant, but during the commentary is a bit like, well, that's going to change in, in a couple of minutes time. But,

but that, that was another thing that we had on the go to try and, to try and keep across it. If we did that late in the game, it suddenly occurred to me because Real Madrid and Bayern Munich had jumped up. So in the sort of 15 minutes to go, whatever, I just thought,

I wonder where they are in the bracket. And it was that point that I was also trying to search. So I was putting my code in to change the thing and get onto the page where I had the bracket, which is then where I realised that it was going to be Manchester City or Celtic would be playing Bayern Munich or Real Madrid. Yes. Well, why don't we take it onto that? Because in terms of the new format

and what we've made of it and how it played out this week, I mean, that is, well, for both of those clubs, but I think particularly given Manchester City's relative struggles in the competition this season,

for them now to be meeting one of Real Madrid or Bayern Munich in the last 16, I mean, clearly real jeopardy on that. And I don't think they would necessarily have been expecting that and actually if you're Real Madrid or Bayern Munich and you've gone okay I think by their standards and qualification we know Real Madrid are slow starters that's that's that's a

rough old draw because if Manchester City get it going that's a really difficult tie obviously well it is and as discussed on Wednesday night post-match, it would not surprise you, would it, in the slightest, having scraped through and got into the last 24 as it is, that Manchester City actually go all the way. I know Rodri's not going to be back, might not be back at all, might be back right at the end of the season. But if they have a better run with injuries

in the second half of the season, and obviously they can use the new signings in the knockout stages of the competition, you know, they might be a different beast by the time we we get to that Real Madrid or Bayern Munich time of course probably by the time people listen to this they'll know what the draw is I've got another one for you relating to the other night which you will enjoy and I think this is very much out of the uh the the theme of what we're doing on here which was I thought pronunciation wise Club Bruges the other night Ali you've covered Club Bruges haven't you already the theme of what we're doing on here, which was, I thought, pronunciation-wise, Club Bruges the other night.

Ali, you've covered Club Bruges, haven't you, already this season? Yeah, I've been there, yeah. Yes, and there were quite a number of names in their squad. I thought, I wonder what the correct pronunciation is for that. However, so I spoke to a Belgian belgian journalist ludo vandewala um i hope i pronounce

his name right um and uh he worked for the newspaper newsblatt who was brilliant he was really really helpful to me but the opening gambit was i said could you could you help me with the pronunciations for club bruges please and? And he said, well, for a start, it's Brugge. So I said, well, yeah, but is that something that some people in Bruges will say Bruges, some will say Brugge? And he said, no, Brugge. So I said, well, when you appeared on Five Live during the week, in the build-up to Wednesday, you were with Naga.

Who did you say? Was it Louis van Gaal? Louis van Gaal. How did he pronounce it? Louis van Gaal. I always remember what he said to me. It was mentioned to him about Club Bruges. Manchester United must have been playing them.

And he said, it's Club Brugge. But this is the classic commentary conundrum. Absolutely. You have to anglicise. There are certain things that we anglicise. And when we went to the pictures, we didn't go to watch In Brugge, did we? No.

No. No. I was struggling last night with FCSB, just using initials as a team name. That was quite a mouthful to get out. If you're going to go for the full Manchester United and FCSB in a rush, I wasn't particularly enjoying FCSB. And also, going back to Bruges, there was the very first name that he pronounced.

I said, well, that's obviously Simon Mignolet. He said, well, actually, it's Mignolet. So we've been pronouncing his name wrong all of these years. But it's been anglicised, hasn't it? But he was adamant Mignolet. So we've been pronouncing his name wrong all of these years. But it's been anglicised, hasn't it? But he was adamant Mignolet.

Yeah. Golden Mike latest. I think these are up-to-date totals. So these are from the start of 2025

goals that we have commentated on during games. So I'm presuming actually that my little reporting shift on Saturday, Bournemouth 5, Nottingham Forest 0, I'm presuming actually that my little reporting shift on Saturday, Bournemouth 5,

Nottingham Forest 0, I'm presuming because I wasn't commentating on those goals, they don't go down. I'm not sure they're in there necessarily. So that might be one

for the panel because I quite happily take, that was some game and I know our commentary actually this weekend, our Saturday 3 o'clock. Well, did you commentate on the games?

Did you commentate on the goals? I reported on them. I brought them live to the nation during Ian's commentary. They're in line to answer. Exactly. I know that you've got this habit of trying to change and tweak rules to suit your own agenda at the moment, Ali, but that's definitely not happening.

Speaking of goal scorers, we've got an email as well from Dan in Bristol. He says, I was mulling over the other night whilst taking my son to football training. Are you enjoying saying the name Marmouch? And are there any other play names you find pleasing to pronounce? And I have to confess, and I'm the only one of us who has so far commentated on Marmouch, unless you've commentated on him with eintracht frankfurt but i found that an extremely pleasing name to commentate on i don't know whether you saw there was a moment where he was through on the edge of the d and hit his shot if he'd scored in the top corner i would have very

much enjoyed that and the next day i actually at villa Park on Sunday, I saw Peter Drury, and the first thing I said to Peter was, did you enjoy my moosh? To which he did. You weren't on the pod where I was saying, you love a joow, don't you? You really love rolling a joow out there, don't you? I do, yeah. Yeah.

Joow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Golden Mike goal count then, as it as it stands john 40 from 11 games but apparently your rate has dropped now to 3.64 per game uh after the game at villa park ian you're 25 from 10 so that's pretty easy to work out at 2.5 and i'm 20 from 8 which is also 2.5 so we're chasing the big man but john is ahead on 3.64 what is the supercomputer suggest is going to be enough prediction at the end of the season do we know that yet no i have absolutely no idea but um in terms of making up numbers what ian is referring

to there i better bring it into the conversation just so we don't have any uh private jokes that exclude the listeners uh we managed to squeeze in a game of golf over here in Bucharest so the game didn't kick off the match the Manchester United game didn't kick off until 10 o'clock local time so we had a whole day to sort of you know get ready for the game but our producer Rob Schofield who's a keen keen golfer as well um lined us up a game of golf at Bucharest Golf Club which is the only golf facility you know anywhere near the city of Bucharest and we got driven out in a taxi out there so me Rob Schofield and Paul Robinson glorious sunshine golf course totally empty no one there it's only a year old but in really good condition so we had a fabulous day on the golf course and I suggested a little game on the first tee that we could play a scoring system. And I said, well, don't worry, I'll take care of the scoring. You just play your golf and I'll

look after it. Paul Robinson, by far the best golfer amongst the three of us, but gave me and Rob some shots to try and make it competitive. Halfway through the back nine, Paul was stringing quite a good round together. And he said, how come is it we come off the back of every green and you read out a load of numbers that you seem to have made up and somehow you're still ahead and i said well you let you let me you know take take care of the scoring and um i managed to come out on top but paul paul have you played golf with paul in he's he's he's a good he's a mean golfer i haven't no no but yet you're actually a bit you've been hoisted by your own petard there because i was actually referring to when you'd played darts ahead of the bristol city fa cup tie oh yeah go on where you'd made up your own rules with uh you're playing a game of killer

well and you and you cheated you cheated producer gary flintoff out of victory okay go on let's let's straighten this one out very quickly our listeners might want to join in on this and tcv at bbc.co.uk so killer obviously i think people will know as you go go around the board from 1 to 20 the rules i've always played are if you hit a double if you're going for the one and you hit double one you're allowed to skip two and go straight to three do you play that no i don't know so if you hit treble one you skip two three no okay so that that it actually makes the game go a bit quicker because we were playing quite late in the evening and they were wanting to shut the place so I thought it would hurry us along but our rules were you've got to hit 20 and then double top to win it and I had quite a big lead and then Gary came charging up on the rails and as he went for 20 before he hit the 20 hit

double top first time and then there was a little bit of all what are the rules there and initially I didn't give him the win and I then hit double top after that and claimed the win I felt so bad about it at breakfast the next morning that I actually thought, no, no, I've got that wrong. That's Gary's win. I had to concede the following day. Well, this is not the first recent commentator-producer bar games rules clash, is it? Do you remember Essen last year when Rob Schofield and I clashed very badly over the rules of pool. And neither of us were backing down.

Yeah, he was talking about that over here. And also, he gave up some tough rules for table tennis. He said that table tennis, when you're serving, you've got to serve diagonally. And he claimed that he was some sort of top player. And he just knocked the ball over the net. So he beat me at every game because he had me serving diagonally. Ian Carter's a stickler as well with table tennis rules. Yes.

Isn't he? Yeah. His one is when you serve, the ball can only bounce once before it clears the end of the table. You can't do a little drop serve that sort of could bounce twice before it reaches the end of the table. Yeah, you're right,

John. Doesn't Ian also say that the, the, uh uh the receiver has got to be able to see the ball when the server oh yeah you couldn't disguise that's right yeah it's funny isn't it yeah right uh next question uh for the commentators uh today uh before we get on some more emails in fact we've got one from lindsey uh who messages us from Winnipeg in Canada, and it's about the subject of nutmegs. Hey, commentators, that's us. My 12-year-old son uses nutmeg

and just meg interchangeably. He'll often talk about a player or his dad getting megged. Do 12-year-olds in the UK use meg as a verb, meaning to kick the ball through the opponent's legs too, or just nutmeg? Be well, from Lindsay.

I have a 12-year-old son who plays football and talks about Megging people. Definitely. That is used as a verb. I wouldn't use it in a commentary. I wouldn't say he's Megged him. No. But it's, yeah.

No. But that's true. It's very much football-ese, isn't it, that? Do you remember in the podcast last week we found out i think it was was it it was in jamaica they call it a salad so have you had the opportunity to use a salad yet no salad for me i have not but are we going to play in the phrase that has been used by another commentator oh yeah do that do that yes i think you're going to enjoy this craig mcgee setting himself up and curling in a lovely effort into the upright of

liam allen's goal to bring it back to one one and listening to the commentators view podcast on the bbc he certainly did nestle that one up where the owl sleeps. I wanted to try and slip that one in somewhere. So there we go. Jonathan was commentating on Kingstonian and South Park from Reigate in the Isthmian South Central Division and managed to get where the owl sleeps into his commentary. Top bins, as we would say. And he's managed to get it in before we have.

So well done, Jonathan. The Football Daily Podcast on BBC Sounds. as we would say. And he's managed to get it in before we have. So well done, Jonathan. The Football Daily Podcast on BBC Sound. In focus. On the Football Daily every Saturday. Catch the biggest names from the Premier League and beyond as they share all with nothing off limits. We are here to speak to Arsenal's Ricardo Calafiori.

Ruben Amarim, welcome to the Football Daily. When I heard this invitation, I felt that I had to do this. Rodri, that was incredible. Thank you for having me here. In Focus, only on the Football Daily. Listen on BBC Sounds. The Commentator's View with Alistair Bruce Ball, John Murray and Ian Dennis. I believe it's time for Clash of the Commentators. This time, last week's winner, Ian Dennis, is taking the reign.

So I'm up against John. I seem to be playing John every blooming week in this. Well, let's see if he gives you the opportunity of going first that he didn't give me last week so john and ali are level pegging at the top of the leaderboard and it says here that i am languishing down at the bottom although it did does also say that i did beat john last week on players to have played in Milan and Manchester. Tight contest, 4-3. Yeah, but below par, weren't we, last week? Oh, it was hard last week.

Yeah, yeah. Well, listen, I've got a victory. I'm not going to scoff at that. Yeah, no, I didn't think you would. But today is all about who will go clear at the top of the table. So John is three from five. Ali, you're three from five. And I'm two from six,

but I'm starting to build up a little bit of form. I'll reveal this week's category in a moment, and then, as usual, you have to give as many suitable answers as you can within 30 seconds. But who wants to go first? Look at the poker face of him. Look at him.

I think last time we played each other John I think you went for I will go first today I think please but crucially now he's got to disconnect but I think he's also then got to turn away look away now

the accusation of him lip reading from last time so we're going to disconnect with John and then we'll be ready to go he's disconnected John's connectivity has gone yeah right with Aston Villa striker John Duran close to completing a move to Saudi And then we'll be ready to go. He's disconnected. John's connectivity has gone. Yeah, right. With Aston Villa striker John Duran close to completing a move to Saudi Arabian club Al Naseer,

I want you to name as many players as you can to have played in the Premier League and the Saudi Pro League. Your time starts now. I'll be terrible at that. Jordan Henderson, Riyad mares sadio marnay roberto famino cristiano ronaldo who else is playing over there who have i seen oh and golo conte plays over there um who else has gone over there i don't think i'm gonna get too many more um there'll be some big ones I've missed, obviously. And I'm just talking rubbish here. Now I think I'm done, Ian.

I don't think that's going to be enough. I've used the time there just to talk nonsense. You know what, though? There, I'll just give the thumbs up to... You actually said, oh, I won't get there, and then you rattled off about five very, very quickly. Yeah, quickly, and then ran out quickly. I was counting as you're going along.

I think you've got six. Oh, I've just... That was quick. Yeah, well, And then ran out quickly. I was counting as you're going along. I think you've got six. Oh, I've just... That was quick. Yeah, well, it was 30 seconds. Are you ready, John? Yes. I quite like being Quizmaster. It means that you don't beat yourself up for the rest of the day.

Yeah. Not help by getting phone calls from friends within two days saying, how could you get Sean Dyche? Anyway, we'll move on. I'll start beating myself up again. Right, John. It's still niggling away, isn't it? It is still niggling away.

With Aston Villa striker John Duran close to completing a move to Saudi Arabian club Al Naseer, I want you to name as many players as you can

to have played in the Premier League and the Saudi Pro League. Your time starts now. All right, Ivan Tony, Cristiano Ronaldo. Who else has been there? Oh, goodness me, that's really hard. Oh, God.

Oh, my goodness I can't think of any I can think of loads who were going to go but haven't gone oh no that's terrible well we don't we don't even need

that that's two you got two that's terrible that's the equivalent of capital cities in Asia there, John. Yeah.

I kept thinking, I could only think of players who were going to go but haven't gone. Well, I think you claim the set six too. Oh. Ali, you go to the top

of the table. Yeah. Congratulations. I've exposed myself there as someone who doesn't watch a great deal of Saudi Pro League. Just a quick run through.

You could have had Aubameyang, Cancelo, Moussa Diaby, Fabinho, Firmino, which you said, Ali, Andre Gray, Damari Gray, Jordan Henderson that you said. Obviously, you said Kante, Laporte, Mahrez, Mane, Mitrovic, Ruben Neves, Ronaldo, San Maximo, Tony, Wijnaldum and Zouma were just some of the other ones that you could have mentioned a quick run through. I think there was 40 in total that we'd counted.

And, John, you got two. Yeah, I did. Yeah, I've had two bad weeks there. Floundering. But you're right, John, there's lots linked, aren't there? Mitoma. Mitoma's another one I saw yesterday, I think. Yes.

Having Brighton rejected an offer for Mitoma. Yeah. Right. Excellent. Top of the table and one at golf yesterday. What a terrific week. I have to say, I won't be losing too much sleep over that one. Right.

So this weekend, in terms of your football, I think Bour think Bournemouth Liverpool I think you've got a potential cracker on your hands there yeah I know looking forward to that one are you driving to Bournemouth? you know I drive everywhere yeah that's

that's always a tricky drive isn't it into Bournemouth if you were to go to Bournemouth you wouldn't go on the train would you? it depends where I would be the next day

but it is one where probably I would drive, yes. Yeah. Yeah, but it's that last stretch, isn't it, into Bournemouth? Well, your friend Tony Pulisian has a really good parking tip there. So you can either park at the ground. And if you're going to be a little while after the match doing the press conference or whatever, it doesn't matter because you will get out. But if you're trying to get away a little bit earlier, there's a queue develops out out of that car park by the ground but tony knows a spot

just the other side of the dual carriageway which if you get there early enough it's only a 10 minute walk to the ground from there park your car there and away you go nice and sharp at the end of the game well we are handing straight to the rugby yes yes yes looking for a sharp half exit okay give give t Tony a call. Yeah, that's a good point, actually. So, three o'clock, Bournemouth, Liverpool, 4.45 on Five Live, Six Nations weekend, is Ireland-England,

and Wolves Villa is going to start on Sports Extra at half five and then move to Five Live after the rugby finishes. I'm at Old Trafford, so I'm going to get to watch Manchester United again this Sunday. I'm going to be really interested in that, actually, because I thought they were good. I thought at Old Trafford, so I'm going to get to watch Manchester United again this Sunday. I'm going to be really interested in that, actually,

because I thought they were good. I thought they were good last night. And can they follow it up against Crystal Palace? So we've got that game at two o'clock. Sports extra,

you'll have Brentford Tottenham at two o'clock. And then, John, the small matter, the small matter at half four of Arsenal against Manchester City. You and Matt Upson

looking for sort of slightly larger treats to eat ahead of the game than that slice of salami. Than we had in the Parc des Princes. Yeah, that might rear its head again. But yeah, really looking forward to that. By the way, I'm also going to Birmingham City on Saturday. I've decided, because I'm not covering a match on Saturday and I'm heading south anyway,

I thought, you know what? I could go and watch Birmingham City, who I'm going to see in the FA Cup next weekend. So it's an opportunity to go and see a team which I haven't seen live this season, Birmingham City. So I'm going there on Saturday. They're on a good run of form. Very good run of form.

Talking League One team, slightly dreading this email because I think we're finally going to have to tell this tale between John and myself. So this comes from Vicky. Vicky's emailed us on tcv at bbc.co.uk. Hi gents,

as a Shrewsbury girl, I'm absolutely loving that my little town has been mentioned on multiple episodes of the commentator's view. I'm a week behind so I just heard you discussing

if it's Shrews or Shrows. My mum was always Shrewsbury, which irritated my sister. I seem to alternate daily myself. I'm very much looking forward to the cricketing in Shrewsbury story. And should any of you feel the need to watch a team fight

for their League One survival, please do pop along to the meadow. Keep up the good work from Vicky. So the Shrewsbury story that we promised a few episodes ago. Ian, have I bored you with this one? No, I'm looking forward to it. Yeah. I can't believe I've not told you this one.

Yeah, you must have done, John. I think the story takes longer than the actual sporting action I'm about to describe. Would that be fair, John? Do you think? Well, what this does is I think I should be telling this story, not you, by the way. No, you should be. I'll tell well what this does is i i think i should be telling this story not you by the way no you should be i'll tell you what i'm going to do john i'm going to set it up and then let you well can i can i set up the setup with it with another you set up the setup i'm going to set up the setup with another email which comes from john in myrtle beach south

carolina so how what about that and he, as you are all traveling to and commentating on different games midweek and at the weekends, I was curious to find out if you ever actually spend time together in the same place. Thanks in advance. Well, John in Myrtle Beach. We did, didn't we, Ali?

We did. We did. Now, this is a few years ago. John and I were both invited to play for effectively a BBC cricket team. Jonathan Ledgerd. In a fixture. Jonathan Ledgerd organized the team.

He has an annual fixture, which is played at Shrewsbury School, which is a fantastic place to play cricket. And that was his former school, wasn't it? Correct. I think I'm right. That's right. So our team, sort of, you know, odds and sods, bits and bobs, got put together. I've not played.

Now, I don't think John has either. I'm not a regular cricketer. I love watching my cricket and listening to my cricket. Not played for a long time. And we were up against, I think it was Shrewsbury School's second XI. So it's not their top-notch players. But they, you know, it was a decent matchup. It was their sixth form, wasn't it?

Yeah. So I will do the setup by saying I agreed to play with a little bit of trepidation. I was asked, you know, what I could do as a cricketer. I said, well, I used to be more of a batsman than anything else. I could take the gloves and do a bit of wicket keeping, but definitely not a bowler. And I decided to make a bit of a weekend of it with the family. So the boys were quite young at this stage. So Lucy and I took the boys up to Shrewsbury.

We had a weekend in Shrewsbury and the game was on a Sunday. So we drove up, I think on the Friday night, stayed somewhere, you know, had a look around on the Saturday. And then I arrived at the ground on the Sunday and was really looking forward to this, playing cricket with, you know, particularly with John, because John and I have had a lot of cricket discussions, often talking about cricket and what we've watched

and, you know, what we've enjoyed. And the thought that we might be able to play a game of cricket together was going to be a real highlight. I arrived slightly late on the Sunday. We were a little bit behind schedule, just sort of sorting out the family and getting packed up in the hotel. I arrived at the ground and the warm-ups had sort of been completed. And as I arrived, I found out we were batting. So I think we'd won the toss and chosen to bat.

And John very bravely had volunteered to open the batting. And I was told I was batting at three. But I arrived, i wasn't even changed whatever and out out john goes to bat and i'm thinking well this this might work out because if john stays out there for a bit and you know who were you batting with john who was i was batting with ben croucher ben croucher yeah who's a good cricketer he does the football news show on the iplep it was a good opening partnership it was a good opening partnership. It was a good opening partnership. So I had time to get changed, get ready, have a few throw downs. My boys have never seen me play cricket. And then Ben Croucher gets out, doesn't he, John? So you're out there. And I'm thinking,

this is set up perfectly. Yeah, well, exactly so. But the point was, these young books who were playing for Shrewsbury School were keen as mustard and we were this this aging collection of you know only very occasional cricketers apart from one or two and ben was one of them so i go out there and they all steam it their their bowlers are steaming in and i'm clinging on for dear life whereas ben is playing quite well and i think ben maybe got 50 or something like that and you know he's on he's on 50 odd i'm on about 13 that i've snicked through the slips and glanced glanced away down to fine leg and it's moving around a lot it's quite a green pitch but they're move they are moving it and I'm like groping past the outside edge, past the outside edge.

And I'm clinging on. Anyway, Ben gets out. He's out first. And I thought, excellent. This is brilliant. Ali's coming in and we're going to bat together. How lovely. And it was a beautiful day.

Wonderful surroundings at Shrewsbury School. And really top-notch facilities. And Ali comes in. Ali comes walking to the crease. And as we get, I go across and I said, you've got to watch this. You've got to watch this bowler. He is swinging it into you. He's swinging it in quite prodigiously.

So just have a look at him. Have a look at him because he will swing it into you so i go down the other end and ali you went through the whole routine didn't you the whole yeah took my guard yeah yeah had a look around the field where i might where i might pick up my first couple of runs where the gaps were yeah he started he starts his run and you back away no not not ready yet no i mean john you tell me from the other end. I think people know where this story is going. So this fellow runs in.

He steams in. He steams in. He's right in the groove. Delivers this ball that has an absolute banana swing in and cartwheels your leg stump. And it's going cartwheeling away. Golden duck. Golden duck.

Nought. Yeah, golden duck. And the delivery is, I remember it, John. I do remember the conversation we had. And the really annoying thing was, I knew that was his last ball. So all I needed to do was block that. They were going to change the bowling. You went for an expansive drive.

I did. You went for an expansive drive. You were went for an expansive drive you were going to crack that to the cover boundary missed it by a distance yeah time was all off missed it by a mile yeah i remember it swinging away to begin with and then jagging back i bet you it was just a straight one and i've completely missed it and so anyway i sort of shake my head and i know john's a teammate so he's he's not laughing, but inside he must be laughing. I actually was laughing.

I was guffawing. I was laughing out loud. It was very much lol time. And I trudged back to the pavilion, and poor little Rory, my lad, who must only have been, I don't know, four or five years old at the time, and he said, Dad, is that what you're meant to do? Like that.

I gave him pretty short shrift as i marched off into the pavilion yeah so disaster how many more did you add to your tally of 13 i can't remember not very many i don't think john bad well yeah john bad well but the annoying thing was they changed the bowling and then you know it was it was a bit easier to school runs but um exactly exactly and then and then i took the gloves and then you know it was it was a bit easier to score runs but um exactly exactly and then and then i took the gloves and i think i must have probably dropped a catch i couldn't move for three days afterwards having done 20 overs of wicket keeping right bringing it back to the football chaps yes finally we've got the story out uh and um yes and that's that's the last time i've ever played cricket uh actually i've not i've, I've not picked up a bat since then.

We have a question. We have a question from the EuroLeague's podcast. It comes from James Horncastle, who says, with the transfer window shutting soon, which new signing in the Premier League are you most excited about commentating on? Is there anyone? Well, you see, we've mentioned Marmouch already,

haven't we? But he's quite exciting. And Husanoff's debut was quite eventful, wasn't it, for Manchester City? Anyone else that springs to mind that we're excited about? Definitely Marmouch for me, even in advance of last weekend,

knowing the reputation that he came with and having had a glimpse of him, I'm really looking forward to seeing him operate again. Yeah, I'd be looking forward to seeing Marmouch. Just to say it as well, I think. Yeah. Ipswich have made a couple of signings, haven't they? And Siso they've taken from Brighton.

Ipswich love to sign those sort of attacking players in those positions to try and create some more goals to help the lap out. And Filijin as well, isn't he? Jadon Filijin's gone from Villa to Ipswich. So I think that'll be interesting. Now, last week as well, chaps, I actually asked a question from one of my golfing chums and we were asking the help of the listeners here.

So this is my pal Smithers. Do you remember who was looking for a footballing term to describe you know when a team is already soundly beaten in a game and then suddenly they find their form, no pressure on them and start playing absolutely brilliantly. Jack gets in touch with the podcast

says, Dear TCV, as a football and language nerd, I've been greatly enjoying the great glossary of football commentary that section of your pod. Aside from wanting to tell Ali's friend Smithers to release the hounds, in my best Mr Burns impression, I do have an answer to his question.

In America, this period of play is often referred to as garbage time. The period of a game where individual players can boost their returns by scoring points against an opponent who's already won and may have rotated their best players out to protect them from injury. I thought this was a fantasy thing.

This is particularly relevant in fantasy sports as it can turn a poor return from a player into a potentially great one, despite them having no positive impact on the outcome of the contest for their team. So I'm sure ABB can relate to that. And I can actually, in fantasy football, I can. Garbage time.

I get that actually as a term that sort of works because it doesn't matter the game is done so you know you might as well have started playing well when it really mattered so will we use garbage time do you think garbage no I like the term but I don't think I'll be using

that plus the fact I wouldn't necessarily put the garbage out no I don't think I would put the garbage out no what about the trash I wouldn't necessarily put the garbage out no i don't think i would put the garbage out no what about the trash i wouldn't be putting the trash out either no ian no the refuse um we've got another one as well which i which i quite like this one as well on a similar ish sort of theme uh which is from alex who says hello tcv team thank you for the interesting podcast in the last episode you were discussing a turn from match that suddenly turned with the losing team snatching

victory from the jaws of defeat. While this isn't strictly what you were looking for since it happened across two legs, do you remember the remontada when Barcelona overcame a 4-0 first leg loss to win 6-1 at home against PSG back in the days when away

goals mattered. Even today, this match is known simply as La Remontada. How many other matches are you aware of that have their own names? But that's a great one, isn't it? La Remontada. But the end question there, I love that, John. Matches that have individual names. That is a brilliant category, that, isn't it? The one that springs to mind for me is 54 World Cup finalist

known as the Miracle of Bern. No, sorry, Miracle of Bern. But also, I was going to, Miracle of Bern, spot on. And I was also going to go for the Battle of Santiago, which was at the World Cup in 1962. That's a good category, that.

Yeah. What was the game where, where, oh, don't they have a name? In the 82 World Cup. that's a good category that yeah what was the game where where oh don't they have a name in the 82 World Cup who played out the dead rubber Al G

the Anschluss the Anschluss yeah and also what about there is a name for the match when Uruguay beat Brazil isn't there

at the World Cup in the 50 World Cup final In the 1950 World Cup final. In the 1950 World Cup final. That has a name, doesn't it? What is the name of that? Oh, I don't know. There is a phrase that they use for that one as well. Tongue-in-cheek battle of the buffet.

Manchester United and Arsenal. Pizza gate. Do you remember that? Yeah. Battle of the buffet. That's really good. Yeah, we need suggestions on those. TCV. Miracle of Istanbul. Yes. Well, of that? Yeah. That's really good. Yeah, we need suggestions on those. TCV.

Miracle of Istanbul. Yes. Of course, yeah. So that's good. So thank you, Alex, for that. That was a very good one. Yeah, really good. Let's finish on the glossary,

because I know Ian's going to have to hit the road to get to Bournemouth. He's got a long journey ahead of him. And I've got to go and walk the streets of Bucharest before I fly back to Luton Airport this evening with the Manchester United fans who've had a great time over here. Ian, you're going to feature here. This is the great glossary of football commentary.

We're building a collection of football terms related to football commentary. This week's suggestion comes from Paul Schofield, who was listening to Ian on Wolves against Arsenal last weekend. Vitor Pereira is furious. He is apoplectic because João Gomes has been dismissed. He was sent off a year ago against Brentford in the FA Cup and he's just received his marching orders again. Marching orders. Is it going in there? Do you think in? I love that. It's great. Probably should. Shouldn't it? Marching orders. Yes, I would back that up absolutely and i've got a new one a brand new one for the glossary

which occurred to me this week when when i found myself during the wednesday night the the champions league commentary i found myself referring to the dreaded elimination line which i thought it's not dreaded i said it and i thought it's not dreaded at all i've never even mentioned an elimination line before so that is a new new brand new addition to the great glossary of football commentary the elimination line but you see that will be that will now start to form part of the footballing vernacular won't it particularly when the champions league when when all of a sudden before you'd say oh they're out of the Champions League, when all of a sudden, before you'd say,

oh, they're out of the group stages. But now it is a question of being eliminated because previously you could finish third and drop into the Europa League. You still had a back route way into remaining in Europe. The Champions League table brings it back very nicely as well. We're going to finish with this.

So Phil in Athens gets in touch and this is apropos our conversation last week about malapropism, so people sort of accidentally misspeaking. Phil in Athens says, didn't Jurgen Klopp in a press conference get slightly confused around the term

brain fog one time? Have a listen to this. Brain fog. Why can't everybody say the word, and if I say it, then it's not okay? Which? Brain. Brain. Brain.

Oh. Lies. So he didn't say that, but it is. Fog. Fog. Anyway, come on. And that's what? F-O-G.

It's like mist. Misty. Ah, okay. and that's what F-O-G ah ok sounds exactly the same to me what I enjoy about that is I think that's the voice of the former Liverpool press officer Matt McCann there who immediately picks up on the fact

that the Liverpool manager might have strayed into territory when he says, right, come on, come on, come on. Did you hear Juliet going there? No fog, F-O-G. No, I didn't. Yeah. Yeah. Our much missed colleague, Juliet Farrington.

Julia, yeah. Yeah, that's very apt. It's foggy, foggy, very, very much foggy yeah our much missed colleague Juliet Farrington Julia yeah that's very apt it's foggy very much foggy in Bucharest this morning that is it for the commentators view this week please keep the emails coming in we love them tcv at bbc.co.uk and the

malapropisms as well any of those the next episode of the football daily is going to be in focus. Ah, now here's one. Do you say Alexander Isak? Because a lot of people this season are now going Isak rather than Isak. I think I've heard that on the Premier League video. Am I not right?

I think on the Premier League video he says Isak, I think. I too am an Isak man. Well, I'll tell you what, we'll find out from the man himself. Have a listen. Alexander Isak. Alexander Isak. So yes, the next episode of the Football Daily will be in focus with Alexander Isak and Alan Shearer.

And we will be back next week with another episode of The Commentator's View. Thanks for listening. I deliberately, deliberately threw in the small matter of, which is what John had mentioned last week. And I swear, if you listen back on BBC Sounds, the big man lets out a little guffaw just before he delivers the team news. It did make me chuckle.

Champions League coverage on Wednesday night will be at the Etihad, Manchester City against Bruges on Sports Extra. John'll be at the Etihad, Manchester City against Bruges on Sports Extra. John Murray might say the small matter of Aston Villa against Celtic. Today he's watching Chelsea against City at 5.30 and he has the team news. Yes, and from the small matter

to the big news here, and that is that Manchester City have two new signings straight into their starting line-up, Marmouch and Kuznac. And Ali, you mentioned the small matter last night as well. I did, I did. We've got full commentary on Arsenal Manchester City.

The small matter of Arsenal Manchester City, that was one of the phrases that got into the great glossary of football commentary, one of the features on the Commentator's View podcast. I've got to say, I'm very very pleased with myself that I've done Manchester United Rangers and Aston Villa Celtic and on

neither occasion did I use the words Battle of Britain. Avoided it both times. I actually heard a news bulletin this week and this was previewing Aston Villa Celtic and to which in the news report it said some people are calling this the Battle of Britain. To which I

immediately thought i know someone who isn't what does it take to go racing in the fastest cars in the world oscar piastri your head's trying to get rid of one way your body's trying to go another land stroll it's very extreme in the sense of how close you're racing wheel to wheel we've been given unprecedented access to two of the most famous names in Formula One, McLaren and Aston Martin. I'm Landon Harris, racing driver for McLaren Formula One team. They opened the doors to their factories as the 2024 season reached its peak. They work to build a beautiful bit of machinery that I get to then go and have fun in.

I'm Josh Hartnett. This is F1 Back at Base. Listen on BBC Sounds.