Goes Without Saying - nostalgia & anxiety: tell me this is your comfort podcast without actually telling me...

Episode Date: April 17, 2022

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ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Nature. I've got a gay rooster named Francois. Is so gay. These rams are gay. I'm studying gay animals. Does that mean I'm gay?

So why don't more people know this? I'm Owen Ever. I'm Lane Kaplan-Levinson. And this is a field guide to gay animals. A podcast about queerness in the natural world. The animal kingdom is queer and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple. Or wherever you get your podcasts.

Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. ACAST.com. It goes without saying that you're listening to Goes Without Saying with Sefi and Wing. I'm Sefi. And I'm Wing. And this is a really weird episode I think in hindsight we talk about consuming content kind of our comfort content and how to soothe your anxieties with certain influences certain shows nostalgia and why we always return to the same old thing rather than trying anything new um so if you're in a bit of content rut like i might be right now i think i watch the office too much um enjoy god that was that was really good gorgeous day we're having i know so nice so stunning so sunny. I don't know how you want to start this, but all I can think about is the fact that we have something exciting coming up. Oh, God. Don't even go there.

I'm really in the zone of it. Guys, we are... We're going to be kitting you out. Are we allowed to tell? Yeah, of course. I think we have to tell. of course i think i think we have i think we have to i think it's in our contract is there a date that we have to tell them we can definitely say it now i get confused with these things we can say okay let's say um well if you didn't get the hint from are working on some items of merch what goes without saying a collection goodness me i'm working my nuts off on this yeah whole thing and it's gonna be so fun has been

drawing and drawing and drawing and boy i've been receiving and receiving and receiving images and screaming it's gonna be looking good guys i think i know i'm biased but like i would want oh these things well say they are so god i cannot wait and also can i actually before i just even go into being like and i really like them and it's so cool blah blah can i also just say i keep meaning to say that we put on the story asking for like what you would want if we were to do merch hypothetically speaking in a parallel universe where we were lucky enough to get to do that and I was laughing so much at so many of the suggestions you're so funny you're all hilarious and so sweet and i just i i don't know if you can tell that i'm like honestly grinning yeah it's it like embarrassing um just so cute thanks guys i don't think we've stopped smiling like that like even i think we both keep having moments because

we keep voicenocing each other being like wait can you believe it can you believe it no i can't like when i can't when we put up that story that was like what ideas would you want like what would everyone want and people were coming through like just saying like random things that we've said like obscure things and then people were saying the same things it's like wait do we have catchphrases but that's i think we do catch. Oh, it was so nice. And just thank you for even being here now. Yeah. Fuck.

I know. I don't. Are we real now? Are we a real podcast? I think we must be. Oh, I don't know. That's weird. Even that feels like big headed to be like, do we exist?

No, surely not. No, I don't think we do exist. it's just this is all happening in your head um how's your day been my day's been really nice it's so sunny i had a picnic in the park today um stunning got an iced coffee we were like um is it too early to get like like picnic lunch food it was like 11 a.m we were like do we get like samosas hummus sort of like yeah but we did obviously um yeah and that was really nice um and i bought this like rainbow thing like this rainbow like oh i'm just showing wing i'm doing a room tour like it's a rainbow it's not what you think no no it's not what you think you're thinking it's

like a sun catcher you're thinking the standard just glistening in the light little kind of nice little thing hanging around somewhere i went on to xc.com this is a scientific experiment it's a mechanism it's basically a sheet of film that's it's infrastructure that just goes at the top of my window could barely see it barely um can be perceived by the human eye um goes across the window and it fills my room with um rainbows it's the most insane thing like all up the walls it's really nice my room is quite a lot right now what was the justification for you buying it can you let them in your is it embarrassing by my logic no i don't look i think i think the line of embarrassing was like 50 episodes ago my logic for buying this so it was 20 pounds

which i think is quite a lot for a bit of film essentially i mean i know our financial status and i know that that is a lot of money to be dropping but my logic was if there was a function on animalcrossing.com on animal crossing happy home paradise for example where i could fill my villagers rooms with rainbows and i was putting in terms of animal crossing money if that would cost around 2000 bells i would purchase that conversion rate for example official so why i would say that 20 great british pounds is probably equal to 2000 bells animal crossing money yeah down with the pound and i thought why would if i'd buy it for marshall why wouldn't i buy it for myself and that was my logic so now my room is filled with rainbows it looks great it was a great it's an investment piece

can you take that off and put it in any window you go to from now on it's detachable it's just up there with blue tax so i'm gonna put it i thought it was like a decal situation when we have kind of a um sort of a bit of a garden party vibe i'm gonna put it in the kitchen and our kitchen's like filled with light nice so i'm gonna be like right guys now it's time for maybe by that point you'll be investing in another guys treat yourself to some merch i'm maybe soon i'll have another 20 pounds how are you at the moment how you're just working your butt off i'm feeling great i'm so good although i am coming on my period and the insomnia is back really you're not sleeping again i i was sleeping and then i woke up that's that's my that's what always happens but it's fine it's fine what time did you wake up

like how many hours you got to um i probably got like three out i think i went to bed at like 12 i woke up at three it's been a long day it's been a long day but it's good i went for a nice walk i was in the north lanes and you've been up since three yeah that's all right what do you do in that time um just torture myself with the memories of my past your eyes are swimming exactly yeah i just think about all the terrible things i've done in my life and what i can't do to change them um it's the classic 3am yeah i don't know i just try and sleep i i don't know sometimes i because i always wonder with that like do you sometimes i'll wake up like did i tell you i told you guys about when i was watching incanto and i thought they were singing about bread do you remember that oh yeah

that was weird that was a that was like a 4am from me but when i like got up and i went into the living room look to be honest let's not get into it sometimes i do crazy things sometimes i go out and about do you no i would never leave the house no i'm not gonna get killed yeah um yeah no i love that thing when you i've only ever really had that like like once or twice where you get up and you like commit to being awake and i remember i woke up about four in the morning and i watched night in the museum one and two and then went to bed that's good though and i woke up like that was weird that's nice but i'm actually sleeping really well at the moment so i'm i'm not too fussed it's all good yeah are you dreaming in your sleep oh my god i had the

weirdest dream i was out and i don't really remember what happened but anyway um it's like it's not important it's not a good story i can't i'm not just gonna make up a dream i hate like you know you can tell someone's making up a dream no because i never i never even think of it i'm just like hanging on every word of a dream it's my favorite thing anyway anyway have you ever yeah go on don't worry no no i was gonna say have you ever made up a dream to me no never i don't make up dreams personally because i take my dreams very seriously serious i take dream talk very seriously god which is why i don't like it well it's more so like as a kid i wouldn't

like it if someone was like making up a dream oh i probably did that as a kid make up dreams yeah yeah that's what it is that's fine i mean i would have given you all the attention sure well it would be a great story i'm sure i'm sure it goes without saying it goes without saying anyway by the way if you make up your dreams that's fine by me oh yeah so what spurred this on for me i can't remember but so i was watching bridgeton that was kind of what spread on the last episode of course if you haven't heard that i would actually recommend the last episode it was good we talked about like um a little bit just the tropes of romance yeah i thought you'd get a little bit of manka in my life i thought you're gonna now it's time for

no it's the worst song i'm so sorry to bring that up guys anyway um yeah i was watching bridgeton i was thinking about like bridgeton is just quite like oh guys don't get annoyed with me but it's just you know like some things are just like the superficial surface sometimes you need something a bit more shallow like sometimes you need sephie and wing to talk about just like dating and like clothes and sometimes you need sephie and wing to talk about something quite traumatic and it's up to you to decide what mood you're in to go into that um and actually i was watching my new year's resolution was to watch more tv which is the best resolution i've ever heard well i've had a really good week of it because i've just finished severance which i was saying to sephie yes is so

good and i was saying sometimes i just go about my life and i'm like oh sephie would like that sephie would like that this would be good for sephie blah blah but when i was watching severance i had it to another level i was like this like she needs it became really urgent for me i was like she needs to see this well it was made for you just the opening i was like oh this would really give her something that she needs like it would really fill like a little void of content for you yeah um anyway and i've spoken before about how like when i actually make the decision to actively consume new content i a lot of the time really get a lot from it but unfortunately i often get into the habit of just revisiting old things that I know that I

like old favorites comfort things comfort shows comfort content online and it's comforting but it's also giving me that stagnant feeling of like I'm not necessarily getting anything new and it just feels a bit passive yeah so I was thinking about kind of from a mental health angle from an anxiety angle how sometimes people get themselves into like habits of staying in their comfort zone and like knowing when to push yourself out of it kind of a content rut so true my elbow clicked as soon as i said that it was going to be a really neat thing but it's probably like content right ow i didn't hear it but that sounds painful i don't think my elbows ever clicked clicked yeah and you're quite clicker i'm a big clicker yeah i'm gonna need a hip replacement soon probably genuinely guys did you know i was born without hip sockets fun fact

anyway that is a fun fact that's such a fun fact for around the room it is yeah two truths and a lie two truths and a lie i was born without hip sockets i was born without hip sockets oh it's a great one honestly the room just goes well the room lights up when honestly crowd goes wild um i love the topic though i think that's so i mean fucking story of my life story of everyone's life just going for the same old you're living in the office aren't you i work at dunder you're a full-time employee i am i am a full-time employee that i was just watching like 10 minutes of it so just quick to be honest best job ever oh best job best job in the world best job ever in that place yeah why do you think you would make the choice to revisit an old favorite rather than go into

something that you might be looking forward to seeing for the first time um not just like oh i'm gonna try something new like something that you actually like you really know that you're gonna like it and like it's been highly recommended to you or like basically why you're not watching severance yet why am i just watching episodes of new girl yeah like what mood are you in what is happening basically when you decide to revisit something quite passively i'm just i'm telling you that it's passive it's not necessarily passive i'm just putting words in your mouth oh no 100 what what what what makes that choice for you why would you go to something passively and return to something comfortable then test something new because we're not in the state i think it's wanting i think it's just lazy it's like wanting that comfort wanting that like there was a stat that

was said something about um during lockdown yeah the office was the most watched show and like those old comforting friends new girl was really watched friends yeah all of the things probably shit like the fucking big bang theory all of this shit that was on like e4 back in the day it's like those are the things that people wanted to watch because it was like i i need something that i know because everything right now is chaos but I don't know what the mood is I always watch The Office for example or at the moment I'm in a thing of watching New Girl and also The Office um almost like when I'm eating yeah it's something that I'm not like focusing on but it's like okay I'm gonna have my lunch now I'm gonna put on an episode and

they're like 20 minutes half an an hour. It's just perfect. But I don't know what that mindset is. This is why I think it's interesting though, because it's like now that universe of that show is keeping you company, which is why I think it's really interesting when it's like online, like content, like your favourite content creators.

Like a load of people said we asked on the story how do you self-soothe what are your self-soothing activities when you're in that like shitty state i can't say i've ever been in a shitty state myself but i can imagine you guys get sad sometimes um and a lot of people so kindly said they listen to Goes That Same. They listen to podcasts and blah, blah, blah. And I remember we had a conversation once about, I think we were talking about Emma Chamberlain. And we were like, even if you're an introvert, for example, or you just want some alone time,

suddenly you're having your quote unquote alone time, but you're in bed with Emma Chamberlain all of a sudden. And it's like, right now, maybe you're having your alone time, but you've in bed with Emma Chamberlain all of a sudden. And it's like, right now, maybe you're having your alone time, but you've got a good old seven wing with you. Bloody hell, God, we're crashing the party. So nice. But I think socially we've changed how we...

That we don't spend time alone. Yeah, or just we've changed, our relationship to other people has changed because I think we let people in so much more. and i think sometimes this is maybe why it's dangerous but like you think it's just alone time so you're like in the bath listening to a podcast or like you're sat in bed scrolling through your phone or like sat in bed even watching like your favorite youtuber for example or even your favorite show but let's say mostly like online content if for some reason then you start to feel bad there could be a multitude of reasons to why you feel bad goes without saying but it could also be

because you thought you were in a safe space but you weren't this happened does that make sense you think you're having alone time but you forgot you're actually taking in the energy of other people this is why i think it's effing when goodness be a dangerous place to be you're on the internet this is not a safe space this podcast isn't a safe space unfortunately it just isn't well this is why i'm shocked when people say that they listen to this to go to sleep which actually i'm not shocked by and i love it because that's what i do with ricky gervais steve carl pilgrim we know it we know we love it problematic crew my faves love them love them since i was 12 and i listen to them every night because i know i'm makes it even more problematic you're like this sweet little

tom girl girl what were my parents doing with these grown men um jokes they didn't know and that's the problem of having access to the internet from a young age you find crazy shit and then you get attached to it i mean the only way you can get to sleep is by listening to the voices um but this happened last night um when i was i was actually going to find them on youtube because i listened to it all on youtube nice it's xfm i type in get all the history i was on youtube and like i think okay i'm going into my safe space right now where they're gonna just talk about fucking monkeys for like an hour and i'm gonna fall asleep um going on youtube i forget no you're not you're not going to podcast kind of xfm beautiful ricky gervais sleepy world you're going to youtube.com homepage was a picture of a new fucking netflix documentary netflix new documentary

john wayne gacy the killer clown picture of him on my home page obviously now i can't sleep i'm like turn the lights on turn the lights on and it's this weird thing where i kind of think okay i'm handing myself over to the sleepy world of youtube you forget you're on the fucking internet yeah you're on the world wide web yeah surfing the net let me tell you a crazy place to be you're gonna find crazy things killer clowns on your home page and that to me is the same thing as being like okay i'm gonna go on to the office right now i'm gonna watch an episode of the office listen did i know it's an episode where it's not giving me jim and pam loving energy it's giving me todd packer sexual assault it's you you're not getting always what you want from it and nothing

really is ever safe yeah no so fucking true So fucking true. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Nature. I've got a gay rooster named Francois. Is so gay. These rams are gay.

I'm studying gay animals. Does that mean I'm gay? So why don't more people know this? I'm Owen Ever. I'm Lane Kaplan-Levinson, and this is a field guide to gay animals. A podcast about queerness in the natural world. The animal kingdom is queer, and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. ACAST.com. I believe you're going to ask me something. Oh, I was going to say, I thought you had something to say though um I do but whatever you ask me I'll just spin it into my I'll just manipulate the

conversation to say my point yeah go on I was just gonna say what do you do to come like what's your comfort thing because I don't feel like it's necessarily always watching something like what's your comfort thing because i don't feel like it's necessarily always watching something like what is your comfort thing um this wasn't my point but i think if i answer honestly my comfort thing my my not intentional version of the comfort thing is i will just like sit wherever i'm on my bed on the sofa wherever and just scroll mindlessly and probably do like two or three hours and then be like oh my god why am i so sad why do i feel bad oh my god where did the last three hours go oh my god um so that's my honest answer i'm working on it work in progress um but i was gonna say someone said this is just just in my voice amazing this is just off the top of my i was gonna say at the top of my head but just off the top of my feed of people's responses yeah

someone said i listened to my comfort people i.e one direction taylor swift and this was my point was that i was gonna say what happens so I think nostalgia is a big part of how people self-suit a lot of the time when it comes to revisiting things like the office like I'm sure you remember when you first got into the office and like where you were in that time and what it meant to you and all of that so I honestly remember binging The Office so distinctly and I think with things like Taylor Swift songs anything I think there's a real nostalgic element to some of our like routines and habits which is yeah sometimes really really nice but also can be really dangerous if as you say like you might be getting Todd Packard talking about sexual

assault on the office that's a dodgy if you haven't seen it that's just a dodgy character it's just just a funny little thing um but have you ever had something that you love that is wrapped up in nostalgia that has meant a lot to you that has then been tainted because it involved a person or a relationship that maybe changed what it meant for you this is my point do you know what i don't know if i do but i i always fear that will happen to this i know that's bringing a really dark energy but you know when it like, when I think of things that are really meaningful. Yeah, to another level. And like, I think of it in terms of like,

even like the book club books. Like, oh, that book means a lot now because we did it in book club. Like we did one called Barney as our first book and that kind of means a lot. And I sometimes think, what if everything turns to shit? Like in just my fearful way,

what if everything turns to shit? And then I can't look at that book anymore. I can't look at like our logo anymore. way what if everything turns to shit and then i can't and it ruins everything or i can't look at like our logo anymore like what if everything we have some horrific fallout or something awful and then we just everything becomes shit and then suddenly harry potter is shit and then it just all of that whoa i know high stakes scary yeah we've really bought in the highest relationship in the most popular franchise into this why would we do that like can't escape it level so that's i sometimes have a fear but i don't know if i have that has happened in past tense right do you have something that's actually happened

yeah i have things that i don't know like like for example you'd be like oh i would always do this with that person and like now i'm not with that person anymore or like those sorts of things i don't know i just never did anything fun with anyone i've ever seen only like films like films i was going to see in the cinema with like things like that yeah see that's a good one yeah i know exactly what you're talking about but like never like maybe could you could you give a bit of that or no um just because if i was listening i would be like oh my god what's she saying what's she talking about i think like i think we've given this before but like the film midsummer i've spoken before about oh my god i loved watching that and that was to be honest that me watching

midsummer the film if anyone didn't know yeah um was me getting out of a bit of like a content rut that was like me like essentially being like let's stop watching silicon valley that i was watching obsessively at the time great show silicon valley you had to watch it so fucking funny so fucking funny um i thought let's watch a horror film let's watch midsummer so great but as i was watching it i kind of remembered oh my god i was gonna see this film with someone that i was seeing like two years maybe a year before um and we never did because it ended blah blah blah um and i remember being like really excited to see that film with them and then it never happened

i was guts yeah two reasons i wanted to see the film then i didn't want to go see the film with my friends because it was like so soon after but then i completely forgot about it but then it reminded me when i watched it but now i don't associate that at all um with that person not at all now totally because you've reclaimed the movie what that means to you yeah but i think it's so interesting how the things that we are just our whole lives end up wrapped being wrapped up in the lives of people that we know yeah or like our lives become wrapped up in our relationships, which is also why I think it's so interesting. I know we've said this before, but like something like like online content, like something like YouTube is so intimate and personal. Yeah.

That almost. I don't know, like are you not watching YouTube videos with your mates? Because I'm not really. I just couldn't imagine that depends what it is but like i could imagine with you like i could imagine because we would both have our own or like i find it interesting that like for example somebody like um zoella zoe sag i know she goes by now i always call people like beauty crush yeah like i go by their like old old names just sticks in my head um but like for example someone like zoe sarg it's like we pretty much every girl in britain

from a certain age has their own relationship with her they've watched a lot of her videos or like every the vast majority of people i know were very influenced by her when we were in like year nine year eight year nine sort of thing um and now it's funny because she's still around she's still making content some of us have continued to consume her some of people have not but almost if i was to sit down and watch one of zoe's videos with someone it's just funny that we all have this kind of joint experience of her but all on our own yeah we didn't necessarily speak about at the time i don't think i was going to gc's oh he's in this video but i loved her at the time and it's just funny that we've all had like the same thing but no one really discussed it it's like this private

thing i think internet content is so honestly beautiful like not to be so cringe i know i'm taking everyone to the pits then i'm taking everyone to like the most wholesome place that it just becomes like disgustingly sickening but i think it's so powerful this like weird like metaphysical kind of sparkling connection that you can yeah have with people that you have never been in the same room as you and I remember actually when we were in Manchester someone asked us about this was a question from the audience someone said something about like keeping a relationship with your listeners and so if it was like I would love to do a meetup and i was like oh my god same but then i was also like i feel like it's the sort of thing where even if you're even if stephy and i aren't around to reply to your dm or we're not gonna turn up at your house when you're upset there's always a podcast episode waiting for you for whatever mood you might be in or for whenever you might need it

you might never need us again this might be the last time we ever get the pleasure of speaking to you and that would make me sad but also like this is kind of the point this is kind of the beauty of the content is it is ready for you to pick up when you need it don't you think i don't i don't know i just think it's really sweet i've never i've never met michael scott michael scott does not exist but i consume michael scott like he's one of my best fucking friends yeah and it's literally steve carell fucking acting his pants off doing a great job steve yeah you're so fucking naturally funny you're witty you're great yeah um but i've never met michael he doesn't exist but he's there for me every fucking

time i need him he's there doing me every fucking time I need him. He's there doing a silly little song. What does Michael Scott offer you that I can't, for example? And what I mean by that... Comedy. Sexual assault. What I mean by that is more so like, what do we get from content that we don't get from people in our real lives

that we love and have from people in our real lives that we love and have an amazing relationship with assuming you love and have an amazing relationship with me and i do and i think but let's not say me just in general because this doesn't apply to you because i would say that what most people would go to like a comedy show is which i feel like most people's like self-soothing safe content is a comedy in that in that genre um most of the time um and i would say that it's because they're like experts at their field they you they can deliver laughs they know what they're doing it's it's gonna hit they've been trained they're great it's gonna land yeah of funny and you're gonna go in and you know you're gonna get your laughs oh so talented i don't need to say it again um everything that man does is funny and that's what you get from me and i was gonna say so much if i didn't have

funny friends it would be like okay i'm getting my comedy there but i have really funny friends like you're fucking funny right so it's like i don't think that steve is making me laugh more than you are she's not i don't think he is at all right well i actually think with something like the office with a comedy show i think it's not funny until you get to know the characters i think at the beginning you're cringing i think the comedy doesn't come from oh my god the amazing writing even though the writing is amazing it's you you love the cast of friends when you love the cast you have to break through and feel a connection to the characters until that point the content is nothing same with this podcast same with anything until you're bought in on the people it's not going to hit as well i remember having this exact thing

with friends i think i must have been like year 10 and i remember being like okay i've learned the final one's name and i remembered it was chandler was the last one i knew i was like okay i've learned chandler now now i'm in and now i can laugh i remember being like okay i've got them all down now i know there's like there's chandler was the last one i learned and i remember being like i'm in now i've got the jokes and like they're my mates now and then i started to find it so funny and now i find it really unfunny now i've gone back like oh god this is really bad um but yeah 100 you need to know the whole office for example with the office yeah you need to know the seating plan you need to know the office you need to know who is fucking coming in and out, who fucking Roy is.

You need to know this shit. It's the dynamics that you get brought in on. Yeah. I think that's why we, as well, like with things like, like all of the universes so popular, like the Harry Potter universe, some people like that for some reason. Some people quote that an unhealthy amount.

All the time. Couldn't be me. Like Marvel, also love that. Right right i'm a fucking loser like tell me you're a loser without actually telling me you're a loser um but i think it really balms loneliness for people yeah because you're you're instant friends bought in on yeah you're bought in on a dynamic i always write this as well because i try and do like a thing in my notes i keep it in my notes and also whenever i do like journaling which was actually a big response everyone was saying yeah things is journaling totally agree but i have to be in

the right mindset or i'm just gonna write like i hate my life i hate my life a million times um but um i always try and write like some things i'm like grateful for at the end or like in my notes I try and do three things a day and one of them that I always write is like or like I always it always always always comes up like what am I grateful for and one of my first thoughts is like whatever show I'm watching like oh my god I am so grateful for new girl it's so fucking funny I fucking love Schmidt so much and then i think is it sad the amount that like tv comes up in this and like my comfort worlds come up in this like is that maybe a bit sad um but then i think i don't think so fuck that like it genuinely comes from a girl

whose new year's resolution was to watch more tv no i don't think it's sad at all but it feels weird it feels weird when your instant thoughts of like okay i'm tuning into a feeling of like what i am grateful for in my life right now and it's like i am so fucking grateful like it's not even in this like because of capitalism though 100 because capitalism does not celebrate consuming good content but capitalism encourages you to go out and be doing something and showing off and making something and be part of a production it's not capitalism doesn't want you to sit home and like enjoy yourself consuming but it does it does want you to do that in a certain way like it wants you to watch two episodes of a show at the end of the night

sort of thing like it does want that kind of controlled consumption but it doesn't want you to love it and that's why shows are like for example shows like i'm not shitting on friends friends served me well for many a year it just doesn't serve me now um oh my god you always talk about how much you hate friends what the hell i used to love it i used to love it love it love she hates friend don't listen to her when i watch it back now i think god i was actually rolling on the floor laughing my head off at this i had no humor honestly what the hell i used to love it so much i think it's funny rocks used to be mine and my sister's screensaver on our phones with roses around his face what is my favorite i know that's problematic but what's your what's this so funny what's your order of the boys because i feel like everyone has a cave oh yeah you had a bit of a crush on charla

didn't you well charla was like recently recently recently don't you remember you're like i'm having this can i say this you're like i'm having this kind of fantasy where i'm working on this set of friends what i don't remember this at all it was it was during the reunion do you remember you were like i'm having this thing where i'm like a writer oh my god yes yes yes i'm remembering this keep going no give fill me in i don't really remember you were saying that i think the crux was that um kind of early season um what's his name matthew perry matthew perry was doing something for you at the time oh he always had i've always loved i've always loved the young ones like i got the box set for

my birthday this is how much i love it i got the box set and i sat there all day saying phoebe looks the best in season three monica season four i went through every single one like i'm ordering them like joey looks the best in season seven like i spent hours and hours and hours and hours um and i remember chanda season one oh my goodness i was in love in love in love in love season one god like young his hair was just so floofy scrappy do but then he just he goes on a very quick decline well anyway yeah you're talking about friends um and then i got distracted you used to love it no by myself by just the thought of that fantasy what's wrong with the fantasy was that i yeah i was like a young writer on the show

and me and like matthew were like bantering young not too young for him he's not creeping my eyes i think he might be in real life like there's some kind of scandals i think really well i don't know because then i think this is what put me on the women after the reunion came out and like post my fantasies around the reunion um i think there was like some video that came out of him like facetiming this like quite young like model whoa i think that could be slander i don't know goodness defamation god you've had sexual fantasy and defamation just in about two minutes matthew perry that must be a record i feel like at least over the past probably five even ten years i've seen people talk more and more about nostalgia or how

nostalgic they are um and i just thought i would ask you if you would describe yourself as a nostalgic person yeah i would definitely go on definitely i love the nostalgia do you know what nostalgia like really gets me and I think there's like different types three three specific kinds like three very specific kind of examples um that like really get me I think it's like CBBC TV like TV that I watched on like CBBC that's like Tracy Beaker, Basil brush moaning the vampire you know it did you watch kaching kaching i wasn't a fan of kaching but yeah kaching yeah that would be in there kind of dick and dom and dabungalo that was one then also like nintendo nostalgia i think that fucking gets me like nintendogs animal crossing harvest moon kind of even like picto pokemon or no you were

never a big pokemon or were you pokemon i liked but it was more like my brother liked it but like show me a picture of like squirtle yeah and i might get tears yeah um and three i think it's like disney channel like disney channel games oh my god like all of that gets me it could bring a tear to my eye on the wrong day it brings tears did i say on the podcast about when i was watching the jonas brothers 3d concert experience did i say that to you oh i remember seeing that me too and i have a scar on my arm now from i hurt myself that day um not on purpose i i well it kind of i i ran down we were at the front of the cinema i burnt my arm on like the screen yeah and i had to like get bandaged up at the cinema anyway

things we do for the jones brothers hey jesus yeah i know that's really cute as you see it the jones white dress and i wish i had it so I was literally thinking the other day I need that dress that I had when I was like 11 but I don't have it anymore anyway um I watched that probably like a year ago now on Disney plus because the Jonas Brothers were really a big thing for me if you know me you know the Jonas Brothers was a really big thing for me but i was not ready to see my young taylor swift make her appearance in that and i cried at like watching her that was the thing that got me was like god with the curls with the guitar oh god it actually hurts yeah it hurts i think it's young miley that oh my god but i was just

really thinking like all of them all the girlies i just think god you really i have seen you've given me so much for so long and i think seeing them so young yeah yeah just take it for granted now but it's seeing them so young it's like shit we've been through so much together you don't even know me but fucking hell i've really taken my money's worth from you thank you like i owe you thank you yeah and i hope you're okay do you know what i mean like put themselves on the line like so much of my personality and aesthetic as a kid was based on how I saw you acting. So much of how I self-identify is based on Maddie from Suite Life of Zack and Cody. It's like, I'm sorry, what? It's so formative.

Like, you were just, you were Ashley Tisdale, just acting. I used to love Ashley Tisdale so much. Yeah. I, it's Maddie. Maddie used to get me. That's just everything I wanted with that loose tie like did you like cavill levine as a kid did i i had the record on singer boy bloody hell so good good times so so so good but i think those are like does nostalgia make you sad though

it depends because those examples i gave are all kind of like universal things i think when you actually think about like childhood memories that nostalgia where it's like okay like i mean i don't really get it with my old primary school because i see it like all the fucking time but like if i was to think about like for example i'm going home to see my like home friends this weekend it's my home friends she's turning 25 big congrats big b day celebrations um and i mean we're doing a bit of a reunion like we're gonna see people that i haven't seen for quite a while like i just haven't seen them since secondary school and we all went to primary school together and i think it's things like that when we're all together we used to be in a group called the hoop group because we always used to sit in a hoop at school sit in like you know like a hula hoop

yeah we used to get sorry this is so weird we had this weird like ritual where we'd sit inside a tire and it would start off with one person like moving the hoop around then another person would like a hula hoop moving it around the middle and then there'd be like all like five of us in this hoop in this tire and we used to call ourselves the hoop group as you can tell definitely the cool kids of the school but i love it yeah even describing it now it's like do i understand you're sat in a hoop no no the hoop is the hoop on the ground holding on to the hoop we're all sitting on this like quite gigantic tire um that was in the there's a tire and a hoop we're all sitting on a tire with our knees facing into the tire like imagine like a tractor's tire yeah um we're all sitting on that sounds like i was when you went to school in a barn you kind of did you're a countryside gal

and then we used to get this hula hoop and we'd all kind of hold onto it. Like the hoop is on all of our laps, essentially. We're all in a circle. Right. And we'd move the hoop around us and just like say, this is the hoop group or something. I don't know what we'd say. Hoop group. I love it.

There was probably a song involved. Okay. Makes perfect sense. Yep, yep. I'm in. We had a secret knock. And when I met with them recently, one of them did the secret knock to like come into one of our bedrooms it was so good not gonna give away the secret knock but it was

great no they had the word choose why is so much about being a kid about like keeping like a secret like a secret code like an entry code password like i know so good so i think when i hang out with them and like i'm when i'm seeing them this weekend i definitely will get that like i think i'll get that like sad feeling of like oh my god like so much time has passed sort of thing yeah do you get that like a sadness all the time all the time um but i don't know yeah all the time yeah it's weird isn't it because it's a happy sadness yeah i think i'm a really i'm probably too sentimental and i probably place too much meaning on like meaningless things or things that people would see as meaningless i'm like oh my god this is the sacred coffee cup like just like anything i'm like oh my god this pavement is

the pavement that i once got like just anything i think it's because we're desperate to find kind of synchronicities and things like can you believe i am yeah yeah like everything's a poem yeah it's really not though like there's nothing meaningful here but i'm like everything's a poem completely um so yeah i'm insane but i just think nostalgia is funny because i don't know it's such like i can't i can't get into your nostalgia no one can get into mine like it's very personal it really like is what shapes a person it's just all your memories and your experiences but also like what you found meaning in yeah because there's a difference between the things that you remember and a memory and and there's a difference between literally a memory remembering specific things like it's

often about like the feeling that you got at a certain time like if i said to you where we used to live in brighton whippingham road i think we can say that safely without anyone coming for us now we've fully moved out and we're not there anymore you might find some go there and try to find us all you want yeah we used to live on whippingham road but like if i said that to you you might not have specific like things that coming to mind but like you can feel the feeling totally different feelings though all crammed into one year so many but it's like i can feel that like in my skin like i can feel like the feelings of it and like i think i have that if you said any of the places that i lived in throughout uni each house different feelings if you said the house i lived in last year

different like every single thing i can i'm not even thinking of like examples but nostalgia works in the way that it's like oh my god i can like but that's kind of what i meant at the beginning of like god i used to go to that park with that person and now i don't see him anymore and i'll walk past it sometimes and like do you know what i mean like things like that i always have that where i'm like or like you might go past someone's road and it's like you haven't spoken in like five years but you might like look in see what their house looks like oh it still looks the same. I'm not stalking you.

I'm not looking into your house. But you just poke your head in, don't you? When you drive past in a normal way, it's just like, I know that house. I think social media has ruined that in a certain way. I think. Because you're always peeking into people's backyards metaphorically that's gross you are you've just had the you not only haven't seen them for like five years potentially but you kind of have you've been seeing you've got a weird idea of who they are now yeah they've they've just they got into that uni and it's all wrong don't you

think if someone hadn't spoken to you in 10 years and then they saw your instagram what would they have wrong oh my god everything do you know what i mean like yeah what would they think of you and how wrong would they be question mark it's just so funny because you're getting it's the classic thing you're getting a curated version of the real person it's just i yeah just have a real conversation and god love it it's weird isn't it crazy i'm in such a weird mood sorry this is 3am for me sorry guys i mean we get what we're given around here maybe we should go then you should probably have a nap i'm dealing with naps do you think i have time to be honest you don't i'm on the grind i'm on the i'm on my girl boss yeah you are you really are such a fucking girl boss these days okay right what time are we on now curiosity

46 minutes god okay so it might be a snappy one but we'll see time to go all right yeah nice well thanks guys well yeah thank you so much go on go on i know i'm being so cringed today but i really just feel like oh like i need you to know how much this means to us that it's real i need you to know and like yeah it's gonna piss me off that you're gonna turn this podcast off and think oh they don't even know me whatever i'm like i really really really i just hope you're okay i just hope things are good and we're so grateful it's so insane just thank you so much and like thanks for being here yeah if you never turn this on again thanks so much for listening to this i'm sorry that this was if you did just listen to this out of nowhere sportify recommended it to you when you got this episode we're definitely weird maybe maybe give us another try please but thank you

so much if you've been here for the first time thank you um hope hope everything's just going well i hope you've got um disney channel games kind of vibes in your life amazing and i hope you're jonas brothering burning up burning oh growing up you're burning up burning up nice great song that's one of my favorite bridges in the song when it strips back it's like oh god it's so good let's go let's go just that bit when it strips back it's so good. Let's go, let's go. Just that bit when it strips back, it's just Nick's little felsenso boy. I had a fucking t-shirt that said, I got it on the tour and it was something, if you guys know Big Rob,

you know what, let's just go. No, no, I really want to know about Big Rob. I had a t-shirt, it was like one of their merch things, but it was a Big Rob one. Big Rob was their, you know Big Rob was in burning up no way was their bodyguard and he was also britney spears's bodyguard

so iconic yeah so iconic he was like a big character in the jonas brothers 2008 universe but anyway you were either there or you were it's a funny place to be like being at the one that chased my dad maybe because of the story i don't know if this story's real me neither now you have to tell it there's always been a sort of mythical story in my family can i tell this yeah what do you think you're gonna get so not even real joe jones is not listening joe if you are i love you so much i love her i love her can you get me in a room with kit just for a second i've got a lot of things to say um but there's been a go on sorry sorry you know rose leslie is doing a movie with theo james shut the front did you know that no i swear to you i swear unless i've dreamt this

in like a 2am delusion did you sorry tell this story about joe apparently my dad when we were like nine said that he once threw a lime so weird at joe jonas how the fuck he knows who joe jonas is is so fucking weird i believed it for my whole life and now i started telling everyone like fun fact apparently he threw a lime at him i don't know why he would do that um now i'm questioning did that happen was he pranking me i think maybe when we first met it must have been like a drinks or something and i obviously brought up the jonas brothers and you said apparently my dad threw a lime at jonas but then everyone like everyone was like that's not true that's not true but also i think we don't leave it at uni for like three weeks or something so it's funny that your flatmates

already knew that it wasn't true it's so weird because i haven't i actually don't think i've actually asked him is yeah you need to revisit that like we've told everyone now okay were you gonna say another little thing i don't think so i i could go on again about how much i love them but i think everyone's done oh no it was the rose leslie theo james yeah you can look into that in your own time i will things to do i will edit this quickly right once again so sorry if this was the first episode you listened to and thank you so much for being what a pleasure to make your acquaintance please please come by again it's an honor and if you don't hear from us seem the worst