Goes Without Saying - off the record: jealousy, feeling lost & 'fleabag'

Episode Date: September 4, 2022

tell me ur fave season is 'sephy n wing szn' without actually telling me...join the conversation every monday.shop our merch: sephyandwing.comcome and chat in our book club!speak your mind on the @sephyandwing instagram!you’re invited to our discord group chat: https://discord.gg/zuPH7gyeGp Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wendy's Small Frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment. And not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh Canadian dairy. It's also refreshingly cheap. Just 99 cents until July 14th. It's a treat for you and your wallet. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Nature. I've got a gay rooster named Francois. Here's a show that we recommend. And this is a field guide to gay animals. A podcast about queerness in the natural world.

The animal kingdom is queer and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple. Or wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com Go without saying, you're listening to Go Without Saying with Sefi and Wing. This is Sefi. Hi. And I'm Wing.

See what I did there? I kind of flipped it. Yeah, I really wasn't expecting to say I'm Sefi. I know, I know. Gotcha. You should have seen the look on your face and this is just another classic off the record from us this one has truly soothed my soul i start off very out of sorts and i think sephie has helped me slowly but surely find my sorts by the end of this episode i think this is a nice one if you just need someone to keep you company. We're just chatting away and hope you enjoy the combo.

Thank you for being here. Love you so much. Enjoy. Hope you're having the best day. God, I feel like I start everyone by saying, oh, we're in a weird mood today, blah, blah, blah. But I really feel like this is taking weird to the next level though isn't it you've taken it to the next level yeah we've just recorded our book club episode then we had like an hour off it wasn't even an hour was it about 45 minutes

just be like right let's have lunch and you just take an asos parcel back and in that time I don't know what's happened let's have lunch let's have lunch do you want to say what you've had for lunch also can we just say that last night when was that i feel sick i feel sick she's been sick for days i've been quite ill recently and now i don't now i blame her i she knew we had to record and this is what she had i did yeah well so i feel really loving because i said she said oh what did you eat i said crisps chocolate sweets and a couple sips of coke before i put the can away because i was just like i can't drink this it's making me sick um what crisps did you have most important question and i said pickled onion space raiders three packets three packets also sounds incredible weird weird flavor to choose the weirdest crisp to choose three packets iconic they are tiny

but you knew you knew you had to record that is gonna make you feel sick for sure it's like a shopping list followed on your space raiders brackets three packets followed by chocolate followed by strawbs chocolate sweets oh i just i feel horrible anyway yeah it's not good the worst sleepover ever i also i did just say i said on the book club episode i've got things to say about taylor swift but i just i don't have the energy now and i want to do her justice so we're going to save that for the next episode yeah um but just know I'm screaming crying perfect storm also can I just say something quickly that I feel like I've got I've had so many messages and comments saying what are your thoughts on no oh yeah which god knows I want to talk about it but it's my absolute

biggest fear in the world to spoil a movie for someone so i i just haven't been replying to any of them which makes me feel guilty but i want to give you the experience of watching that you deserve without having my stupid thoughts in your head so i'm just not saying my thoughts to anyone but i want to do we said this on the book club episode as well i think we want to do once wing has watched it like a special episode we're going to discuss nope you know do you want to do that or are you just feeling sick no no i do i do but no sorry i'm gonna make everyone it's like monday morning this is not a hug on a monday morning is it oh god right shall we yeah let's do it this is a lovely question record yeah god i mean you can definitely tell yeah yeah you can

tell they have a different energy you can tell um really nice questions thanks everyone thank you so much genuinely thanks also like we've been talking about you all day like all day we're in a very excitable mood at the moment aren't we about the pod and i think there's highs and lows at the moment we're in in about an hour of conversation we managed to just do the full spectrum of emotion and now we you said we whipped ourselves up into a frenzy which i thought was a beautiful way of saying it because that was exactly it and i do feel quite whipped but the frenzy was us both just pretty much lying horizontal feeling sick so not much for frenzy kind of burrow under like blankets and stuff i ended up shutting all the blinds and all the shutters are closed anyway

yeah the question i thought this was really sweet and i feel like it would be a nice combo and i don't think we've ever spoken about this really okay maybe only once or twice this person said what makes a good friend to you oh nice it's nice isn't it do you want to go first yeah i feel like there are a few things i don't necessarily want to go first but thank you um there are a few things obviously goes without saying one of them that my instinct was to be like just someone i can be myself around which sounds so cliche but i do feel like i need to feel with my friends it's like i feel happy to be who i am in your presence yeah which is actually um no small feat it's quite a um task I think to make me feel comfortable

do you think I feel like I think I'm quite chronically uncomfortable not that I would let you know that I'm uncomfortable unless we're in a certain awkward situation do you mean yeah um but then I was also thinking I really think the sense of humor is quite important this was going to be my number one and i yeah i think it's been kind of a big kind of a learning curve almost for me that i do think i've been working out what is a feature of people that i really like like what is the number one thing that draws me to draws you to someone yeah and there was a while when i was i think it's like i like intelligent people or like blah blah blah people i like even just like um i don't know cool people whatever

but it's like i like funny people yeah i like people that i think everyone says they like funny people but some people i'm not buying it well yeah i know a lot of people i'm not buying it i honestly think it's it's i think it's my number one yeah attribute that i like and it's not even just like oh i like people that are just like gonna crack a joke i like people with quite a specific sense of humor i like quite a i don't even want to say dark because it's not dark but it's almost just like um you know what I was gonna say earlier was what I'm what I was thinking earlier when I was thinking this what is my answer I was like the sense of humor you need to not be scared when I joke about my mental health

for example you need to be able to take you need to a bit of darkness yeah because darkness is funny it has to be it literally has to be if darkness is depth for example and that's why i think intelligence does kind of go hand in hand with it because i think you have to be able to intellectualize why something is or isn't funny because i think there are a lot of people who would say exactly there are a lot of people who would say i always have a really dark sense of humor and it's like no you're just racist sexist homophobic that's not funny all of these things you're funny yeah where's your sense of humor exactly you actually believe 100 to be funny oh my god there's a line in self-esteem someone actually also said what music do you recommend self-esteem prioritize pleasure saying this just last night oh it's so good it's so good i've been obsessed for ages but

she's not getting enough even though she's getting i've been obsessed for ages but she's not getting enough even though she's getting so much attention she needs more but there's a line that she says um like it's kind of did you know that being funny requires some sincerity and it's like yeah yeah you need to be sincere you need to be kind you need to be clever empathetic all of these things to be funny so to be actually funny so funniness is kind of the cheat answer because you say that and then you get the that's the umbrella term for all of those things but it is actually funny it is yeah because there's a there is a specific humor that i'm looking for and i think that's it you can see so much of it also in the podcast it's like

it's not just about funny it's like oh you're being funny by referencing my favorite films for example oh you're being funny by connecting with there's a level of connection there over things that are quite deep or just you know hit the soul yeah and there's also most of the time when I walk away from meeting like a new person, sometimes if I walk away and like, I just felt a click and I'm like, I just like them. Like there's something about them that I just like. Usually if I trace it down, it's that they were funny. It's like they made me laugh. If you can make me laugh, which is not a hard thing to do, but if you're funny, it's just like, you've won me.

Well, I always think with an interaction, if I walk away it's just like you've won me well i always think with an interaction if i walk away and i'm like oh that didn't really go well it's because i feel like i didn't get a laugh in oh do you know what i mean but we were actually just saying this like maybe we have an issue like maybe we have an issue with like we need to be funny or like funny it's a bit of skill to not be funny and be like it's not my job to make you laugh actually yeah maybe that's even cooler like maybe we're a bit pathetic in that we think we're like these like court jesters like trying to be funny and everyone's like you're not funny though like there's something quite tragic we always get laughs maybe not on this podcast but we always get

laughs irl yeah because we're both tragic and we think each other are really funny maybe no but not just with us i mean in real life with other people well of course we get laughs i'd absolutely stop making jokes if no one was up it would be my worst nightmare there's nothing worse than that feeling when you make a joke and it's just silence but i think that's a problem with them not you agreed okay well i'm glad we agree on that i'm really glad we agree on that let's see if there's haven't we also we were going to do one on uni oh yeah uni which is the most requested thing of all time which is so strange to us we're not writing your personal statements for you we're not choosing what uni you need to go to guys but we were

thinking like we better do it soon before we get too old and we can't remember anything it's like uni what happened at uni so i also don't want to cut anyone out because i know uni isn't relevant some to a lot of people i guess so we'll just figure out it's hardly relevant to us yeah for some reason we're the spokespeople of uni i guess i know but i guess it's before you're going or if you're there it's like all you want to get the content all you can think about isn't it yeah so we will do it um we just weren't feeling it today because we felt so sick because someone is funny and we've got book club tonight it was actually irresponsible oh stop reminding me oh god i feel so sick i'm not gonna be able to give my best self unfortunately i honestly think everyone in the book club must be traumatized

by me because i always like show up like this absolute goblin like sorry about my performance this month guys I don't know you do not at all oh anyway you show up absolutely stunning you've usually got like a beautiful light on you a little setup yeah okay this question I thought this was a good one actually how did you when I say a good one actually I don't mean like finally someone sent in a good question i mean like maybe sephie and i will finally bring something of interest to you it's always like the best questions with the worst answers um never against you it's always against me personally right this person said anyway fucking hell how did How did you each find a... Go on. You can do it.

I can't do it. How did you each find a sense of self? Just rip it off like a plaster. How did you each find a sense of self? Because my immediate reaction was, I haven't, actually. Really? But then I also think, I absolutely have. Yeah, you have.

Oh, okay. You think I have? Yeah, I think you have. Definitely you have a sense of self but I don't know how you found it. I think for me I don't think it was a case of finding. I think it found me. I think it is literally just through passing life experience yeah yeah and also like isn't a certain amount of that formed according to science i guess some scientists probably said that like your personality is formed by the age of like three or something i once had oh do you think it's a personality do you think a sense of self i think there's a sense of self a sense of self I think there's a sense of self a sense of self within me that cannot be shaken like my core core core self like almost my soul that I describe that is what I know it to be I can just see a lot of it in my family like all of the people in my family also have a kind of

similar sense of who they are like underneath it all sort of thing and then i think i have layers of like identity on top that like yeah so i studied english for a while so that was english is my identity and film and then i now have a podcast there's a podcast layer on it for example now i have blonde hair there's a layer of selfhood that now has blonde hair which i never thought i'd have and there are loads or like when i'm wearing a dress i identify as someone that's wearing a dress blah blah blah if I'm wearing trousers which I never really do but I want to start wearing maybe I'll identify someone that wears trousers and that all shit that can all shift and that's something that you can find by being like I'm going to buy a pair of jeans for example but I think underneath it all the sense of self is there and I can feel it I don't know if I can

describe it but like I don't I think that has been formed and been in me like almost from like childhood like almost the sense of like this is who you are um and you are this and don't explain could you give some hints some little flickers i don't know what it is i think when i can see it in in my family i see it as almost like an it's it's quite unapologetic almost it's quite like a confident unapologetic nurse which i really love and i hate to see it be broken down by the forces that be of society but i think there's like almost uh you know like an idea of selfhood that's like that can't be you can break down all of the identity shit you can break down try as you might yeah stuff but the thing in the very middle that's been there at fucking all these things is just almost just

quite like i guess kind of almost like an indignant little girl that's like a little bit angry just like i'm gonna fucking stand my ground yeah very true wendy's small frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment and not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh Canadian dairy. It's also refreshingly cheap. Just 99 cents until July 14th. It's a treat for you and your wallet. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts.

Here's a show that we recommend. Nature. I've got a gay rooster named Francois. Is so gay. These rams are gay. I'm studying gay animals. Does that mean I'm gay? So why don't more people know this?

I'm Owen Ever. I'm Lane Kaplan-Levinson. And this is a field guide to gay animals. A podcast about queerness in the natural world. The animal kingdom is queer. and we are a part. Find a field guide to gay animals on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. Everywhere.

ACAST.com Yeah? What about you? Is that a bit of a weird thing to follow? It is a little bit, but I like it. It is a little bit, yeah, but... No, I love it. I'm joking.

It's perfect. And I totally see it for you but I really do um I think that's what I always say when I do bread for the table for you I always say you have this kind of you got this little thing you say it but I see that as the self like I can see it within you like not as in I can just see all of your traits like without the identity stuff on top of it there's like a little spark in the middle and to me that's the sense of self like that's the stuff that will follow through all the identities of like that will go through your life okay and what are they what is it what's the soul saying it's like let me tune in let me

it's like god stop looking at me stop looking at me it's the bit in fleabag where he's like what's that where did you go where did you go oh my soul is like what's going on i don't spoil it there was a song in um a club that was in in fleabag oh it was i'm still jenny from the block oh yeah nice that played and he's listening to that one point and i started like tearing up in the club just of how much i love fleabag and specifically how much i love the hot priest like in a club everyone's dancing like what's wrong it's like i just love the priest also jenny from the block like not a song that i would have associated with fleabag in any way he just is playing it for one second it's almost like a song you wouldn't associate with him yeah that's what's cute no one saw no one asked me why i was crying but that for me feels more like i can see phoebe

waller bridge choosing that song for him it almost feels a bit too much i can i get that i almost just love that like she caught him off guard listening to that and then no i do know what the bit that was making me cry specifically the bit that is just almost so cute because i actually do agree with that that it's like it's too on the nose yeah the bit when he's like do you want a g and t and it's almost that he really thinks that's cool. Oh, God. Oh, God, you're putting me off, actually. I almost thought it's such a priest move to be like, do you want a G&T? It's a bit like, oh, such a priest move. Cool priest.

Cool priest, yeah. It's such a priest trying to be relatable. Do you want a G&T? It is, yeah, G&T. It's like that's how he tries to relate to Fleabag. It's just quite cute. Yeah. I love him.

It's also true it works yeah it does work love it go on your soul you want me to describe your soul i don't know if i do on you but you just seemed so sure of it earlier that it was intriguing but i am also quite scared but i just know your sense of self are your sense of your how i would see your sense of self your like core being your crux okay yeah um is almost quite like this empathetic sensitive kind quite like curious and i always say you love information which is a weird thing to say about someone undeniably a weird thing to say about someone i do like information loves information like you love scouring the net for the latest goss and also stuff that happened about five million years ago so

you just love all the information and i think it's the historian in you okay um and i can and i just think your core core being is very like curious and almost like a gatherer of information in a very kind um and like sensitive way okay nice thanks well again we're up thing to follow no we're up for the, weird thing to follow. No, we're up for the taking, guys. Let us know what you think our sense of self is. Let us know in the comments what our sense of self is. Can I ask you a question?

Thank you for those lovely comments. That's okay. I don't even know if they were lovely. It's a bit weird to be honest. Yeah, it's nice. No, but I agree with you because I do love scouring for new info not even scouring for new info but almost like i think the i think finding the truth is very important yeah also it's the thing where i'll be like to you have you seen this thing you're like yeah i i struggled to see find a thing you haven't already heard already got my mitts on yeah i

was like oh my god i've got to tell you this crazy thing you're like yeah i know there's even if i'm fresh off the press it's because i'm up all night i'm getting the news cycle from every time zone yeah but you you are always first to the news well Well, that's good. It's almost like there's some kind of little scam going on over there. You're like kind of... I'm God. Yeah. You've got some computer's hack or something.

I'm a puppeteer. I was going to ask you, when has there been a time where you have least feel like you know your sense of self? Like you felt a bit lost in your sense of self? Ooh. Ooh, spooky. feel like you know your sense of self like you felt a bit lost in your sense of self lightning strikes it's actually embarrassing to be like i like a sense of humor and then we make jokes like this it's like god god yeah it's not good um i think whenever i'm like riddled with anxiety is when i just feel so distant from it like whenever i'm in a place where i'm like oh my god i don't feel good enough to be

here or i feel um judged or like i'm just i'm letting myself down i'm not speaking up enough i'm just being being small in any way oh it makes me sick i actually feel like i'm betraying my soul like my entire sense of self like you are betraying it for because you can't like you're you're just so anxious and that's when i feel really like distant from it. What makes you anxious? I think other people. It's my Stephen Bartlett impression. It's so Stephen. We were literally saying. Sorry, that's hilarious.

We were saying earlier. And on what? Stop, you're doing private jokes on a podcast. Sorry. It just takes too long to explain that. We were saying earlier about... Not laughing at him, by the way. Always laughing with him.

Sophie's actually quite in love with him, if you don't mind me saying. No, I don't mind you saying. Let's put that out there. If anyone's listened to Diary of a CEOo it's a podcast that everyone's listened to it surely he's also the new dragon on dragon's den yeah if anyone's watching dragon's den which i am because i love it well i love actually just love him you're business-minded do you think 100 you you are like as much as you're not a capitalist you really are a good like oh i think like business and like entrepreneurial um pursuits are quite a bit of your sense of self

or like you're do you know what lets me down the money i don't understand the numbers maths unfortunately that's what lets me down And you know what really lets you down is your business partner is me. No, no, it is because also bad at maths and just too kind of meek and like embarrassed to feel comfortable charging any money for anything, which is embarrassing. Well, I could throw you the Stephen Bartlett question

back at you. What makes you anxious? What makes me anxious? What makes you so meek? anything which is embarrassing well i could throw you the stephen bartlett question back at you what makes you anxious what makes me anxious what makes you so meek what makes me anxious is um the this kind of setup i prefer to ask you the questions and take the weight off if you haven't noticed but that's probably what stephen bartlett would rather do and he's actually he's thriving what do you mean just almost I want to puts it on other people he would rather put it on other people the Zane Lowe vibes yeah yeah intimidation yeah I'm not trying to intimidate but I what makes you anxious you you but I get a bit apprehensive sometimes I think the people pleasing in me never wants to like give

too many firm statements or like declarations on this podcast because I don't love the idea of people coming away being like oh I didn't like what she said there and I'm just working on that being a given a Florence given that that's just the reality of how things go and i can't please everyone but i get nervous even being like my favorite color is green but it's like yeah you've been using plastic straw sometimes so how dare you did you know that green was the color of the soldiers army that were used to kill this all of these i don't know yeah i agree that does make me anxious i think i think mine is just other people just make me anxious like people that i don't know i think like an acquaintances i'm okay with strangers and i'm okay with like close friends but almost like that acquaintance level in the middle i just

have the worst social anxiety with those sort of things like why what are you thinking in those situations I think it's um from always being someone that is just a bit weird like is just how just has a weirdness that is often commented on throughout my life um and I have made a level of peace with that now which I'm fine to be weird or whatever but I think I'm always just terrified of those moments like there's just been so many moments in my life where like I've been so embarrassed by someone pointing out like you're weird or something like that and just being a bit like almost upset by it yeah um now I think I'm okay with it but I think I did I get scared of like almost people not saying it like there's like a I've done a jarring thing i've said a jarring thing and it goes away being like oh that girl is so weird

that scares me a bit but i don't know what like a first impression kind of thing yeah i almost think like i'm someone that i feel like you've got to get to know to kind of understand like i don't i think the first impression of me might be a bit like strange i'm not really sure but i think those sort of situations where you've only got one chance to like prove yourself those stress me out like i want a couple i want to be able to say a few sentences because i feel like three sentences i might have won you oh 100 but also i'm not here to win like i'm not here to win these people of course not it goes without saying lucky to be in your presence thanks no it's true lucky to be okay this is a good question sorry i'm really just reeling them off but you don't to i can get so much haven't had a because i feel like we're trying to do this in one take so i don't want to no i've literally got one here i

had to unscreenshot it okay go on um how again i feel like i'm picking impossible questions but they are good questions i think how do i stop comparing myself to other girls i don't think you can i roll yeah i actually don't not i roll at you just i roll at like comparing yeah i don't know anyone that doesn't do that like the most stunning and beautiful people i know still do that so i don't know how you don't do that yeah the people that I've known that are so amazing just intelligent like the person that is the top top top of the world they're still doing it so I don't know what the person that you're comparing yourself to is doing it and I think almost that allows you to step outside of it for a moment if you realize that everyone is

doing it it shows what a waste of time is that you're doing it but i don't think you can stop the act of doing it i think what you can stop is like the ruminating on it you can stop like obsessing over it and catch yourself once you start it but i don't think you can stop i think take the shame out of it as well yeah yeah that added layer of guilt and shame. Get rid of that. Get rid. As usual.

But I also think just you saying that reminded me something. I'm sure I've said this before as well. Someone's doing the bins outside like a van is like tipping by the sounds of it like bottles into a bin. Should I stop for a bit? Maybe let's like wait like five. Like half a minute. I couldn't even do the maths for that. Yeah.

30 seconds. Yeah. That's, I'm leaving that in. Half a minute. I can never do the maths of that. I just couldn't think of it. Like, five seconds isn't long enough. I it like five i know i could tell because it's like five minutes is too long and i knew what you meant five seconds is too short but i'd said five and then i got thrown okay i think they might have stopped yeah um something that kind of snaps me out of things something that snaps me out of comparing myself to other people and it's a bit sick in the

head um but yeah there's a lot of different there's a lot of nuance to it but something that snaps me out of comparing myself to other people is in the way that reminding myself that everyone is comparing themselves to everyone all the time yeah is when i'm comparing myself to other people i remember that other people will be comparing themselves to me and i think that snaps you out of like let's not be ridiculous then do you know what i mean and just like it is this universal thing like in the way that other people would look at me see a pair of shoes and think oh that's a nice pair of trainers sally said why can't i i know i know um i wish i had those trainers blah blah blah whatever i know everything that's going on behind closed doors in those trainers so it's a good reminder of well if i can see that for myself

and know that people still look at me like that in the ways that i'm probably looking at her she's got her own shit going on behind closed doors. And that kind of makes that more tangible for me. No, the girl that I'm comparing myself to. Maureen. Maureen. Aw. Cute name. My Auntie Maureen.

Auntie Maureen, yeah. R.I.P. Maureen. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. In the way that it's almost like, because everyone always says like i don't compare

yourself to people like their life is probably shit blah blah blah you know yeah but i think that's kind of hard to grasp but reminding yourself that in the way that you are looking at her with admiration other people will be looking at you like that even if you think they're not i promise you there's someone out there 100 yeah and you know how silly that feels so then you can imagine how silly it would feel to the girl that you're comparing yourself to yeah that you're comparing yourself to her isn't it such a trick like it's such a trick trick of the mind every single person think and a very intentional trick as well like literally a marketing steven bartlett trick it's not his fault it's not his goddamn fault he's just out here being cool and asking intense questions to joe sug on a podcast um but every single person

it's just crazy to me every single person is insecure every single person is comparing themselves to other people then what the fuck are we doing like what the fuck are we doing like that yeah to me that that should be enough as evidence not to do it that it's bollocks but for some reason we all forget it and we go back into just the shit of comparing ourselves and blah blah blah but i don't know why that like the fact that we know that everyone else is doing it literally voids the whole thing anyway but then we can't stop it's just such a trick can't stop it is yeah okay can i do one can i ask you one yes please let me find one oh well someone asked this that i actually really liked but i can't find it for that like the exact words for word word for word um they said what's your favorite season what's your

favorite season okay just what is your favorite season very light you go first autumn i think oh it's a good time of year for you i know that's why i'm quite excited i i'm so excited for halloween i love like not even the specific day of halloween i love the vibes of halloween i can't wait i've already been trying to plan my costume can't wait what are you going out so like last year me and my friends did shrek oh yeah so fun we weren't invited to well me and one of my friends we weren't invited to any parties so i said to my other friend i was like if he can sort out a party for us to go to i'll provide his costume and he was like you can come with me but i'm not fussed about costume but i made a shrek costume for him yeah made a

puss in boots costume for his friend i was donkey my friend was fiona they wore them which was so nice of them because no one else was dressed up and it was so nice of them and it was actually like i love making the costumes so much against everyone's will i love being like guys this year we're going as i want to do charlie in the chocolate factory who would you be mike tv what's his costume cowboy hat like i think i can do it so well so my friend wants to be augustus gloop she's gonna be like chocolate bars she's gonna be three bags of space raiders yeah yeah nice so fun um you're all thin like this oh oh perfect um okay so yeah i know i'm just quite excited about um she's gonna be augustus gloop

god did you not hear any of the costumes she's gonna go my friend's gonna go as gustus gloop then but then i but then like there's violet bow regards brucasol but we're not doing charlie bucket because boring costume charlie yeah that's what i was thinking yeah like what's he ripped up jumper it's kind of what i look like every day anyway yeah exactly that's my everyday attire um but i don't know so that that's my idea so i'm excited for halloween for that but then i also think i don't know there's so many fun things like you love the autumnal vibe i love the spooks i love the spooks of it all i love just like the orangeness of it

all like how stunning is that and i'm quite excited for like quite a bit of rain yeah the raining outside whilst you're inside vibe is one of the best things in life yeah and i can't wait for that that's what about you um i find it hard in quite the libra way and kind of what i was talking about earlier i can't really choose a season yeah which i know is annoying but i feel like there are just so many good points about all of them i know sorry i'm devoid of any personality but i just feel like i feel like you can be romantic about all of them well you can but like say i said to you um like what's your favorite thing about one season like what's one that comes to your mind

comes to your mind about one of the best things about any of them okay i'll give you i'll give you some little quick little yeah quick fire favorite things about seasons okay you tell you ask me a question i'll give you the first thing off my head this is really off the record now what's your favorite snack in summer oh god it has to be space raiders three packets obviously obviously what are you doing in winter snoozing what are you doing in spring also snoozing i'm probably crying as well but also feeling quite good i do quite like the sense of spring it's like i'm by spring it's i'm settling into the new year easter it takes me it takes me a while to recover yeah i've never really been one into easter but i'll take it me neither never been a big easter fan favorite movie to watch in autumn oh it's not a movie but i feel like

gilmore girls is the perfect autumnal i've never seen it it's so autumnal it's really um a bit nothingy yeah but it's really autumnal and i'm actually i do really love the animal crossing autumnal vibe yeah absolutely and i feel like there was a big trend last autumn where people were doing quite cute like autumnal kind of suburban towns oh my god so cute i love the town on quite gilmore girls yeah very very cute so i do love that vibe and i feel like gilmore girls is good for that really fun what's it what are you excited to wear like in in any season are you more excited for summer clothes winter clothes here's the thing i feel like i got really to a good point with the cold weather where i was every day in like my long coat

some sort of scarf like i was really loving like wearing all black and then like a bright pink scarf or like my bright green scarf or right blue scarf or something um and like trainers and jeans or like my trousers my leather trousers whatever sounds great jumper like kind of tucked away like little hat maybe like my boyfriend's cap kind of like no one can see me sunglasses no one can see me that's the vibe yeah it was yeah with her underwear hanging out beautiful but then when the hot winter came boy i was in for a shock all of a sudden it's like what do i wear when i can't wear essentially a dressing gown and like a scarf around my head

and all these things it is kind of shocking isn't it that season change yeah wait i've just got comfortable with all my clothes for summer i've just kind of got that down i just figured out who i was actually i just found my sense of self yeah i just found it and it was and now i've lost her again and now i've got to let that scarf go very tailored to wear my slytherin scarf that i got at the end of last winter got it the worst timing ever to buy a scarf um but i'm thinking i can make it so cool almost like you will picture this picture the scene picture this oh i am picture this scene night out you've got like almost like this is like a winter night out boots boots i'm almost picturing my boots and my spotty tights little tiny little skirt it's got that's a crucial element to make the that is crucial kind of a i don't know what top i haven't thought about that big

fluffy jacket and a slithery scarf very red lip to match the slitherin aesthetic to clash with the green nice with my white blonde hair is gonna picture the scene perfect and very autumnal very autumnal just can't wait for the look yeah that is a look perfect so yeah i mean my answer is all of the seasons unfortunately to be honest that's completely valid let me give you one more okay oh someone's just quickly someone said not a question i'm just having a crisis so any advice is good um no advice but no no that um but just wanted to say hey hope you're okay we're having them too we're right having them every day i feel like you don't even believe us when we say we're having them every day but oh boy god i think what you can do advice and this was advice i gave you the other day and i almost feel

like is the ultimate advice for um kind of what to do in an emergency go and have a hot chocolate i feel like that is perfect it's kind of an instant cure it's kind of lupin handing out the it helps little squares of chocolate i do think there's something about like go and have like a hot chocolate just make yourself a hot chocolate sit on the sofa and i think obviously it doesn't solve any of your actual fucking issues but it really soothes the like emotional thing that's going on it also makes it romantic yeah so you have it makes it a bit cute actually and i'm like god i'm in a crisis and i'm really in a crisis and all of a sudden it's god i'm in a crisis with and i'm all tucked up with my little hot chocolate and it's very very

cute and it just becomes almost a bit more like okay i can do this yeah this i can do and also i feel like a hot chocolate is something that i almost need permission from someone else to have a hot chocolate because it feels a bit luxurious it feels like i'm not gonna go make myself a hot chocolate but even though i'll make a coffee tea every fucking day matcha i'm into into now but fucking hot chocolate for some reason feels a bit like god all right decadent like all right prince elizabeth so decadent princess what's her name queen elizabeth prince elizabeth how dumb can you be oh my god all right prince charming what are you gonna do about that have a little hot chocolate bloody hell but so have a hot chocolate i give you permission to have a hot chocolate definitely

send us a photo oh do you know the best hot chocolate you can have and i've mentioned it time and time again the hot chocolate in the simpsons movie that flanders makes so that was a genuine recommendation coming my way best thing ever um it's kind of the ice cream shop thing of like you can't be too sad in an ice cream shop yeah you just can't you can't also i was having a bit of a breakdown um a couple days ago and i just felt terrible i felt really awful and i just did all the wrong things you know what it's just like you feel bad and you go looking for someone that's trying to kill you essentially I wasn't actually doing that why would I go looking for someone

who's trying to kill me perfect I needed I needed the words but they weren't coming yeah um and I was looking at things on the internet that weren't helping I was like why am I doing this all I needed to do was step away from my mind for a second yeah and i went outside and i walked to wh smith's a bookshop and a book a book saying kind of stationary shop and yeah and like warm crisps and it's a way and kind of vouchers it always gives me a stomach ache in there actually i'm kind of connecting the dots now with the crisps i just feel like wh smith was like oh there, actually. I'm kind of connecting the dots now. Why? With the crisps. I just feel like WH Smith is like, oh, suddenly my stomach hurts. It's kind of an airport vibe.

It's in airports. It's really airport. It's like, oh, suddenly I need to wash my face. Like, my skin feels dry. Yeah. Agreed. I feel like they've always got really hot. Like, the radiators are on full.

If anyone from the WH Smith team is is listening please turn the radiators down and maybe turn the lights down as well like it's just a ding ding ding bright light vibe it's intense yeah um but i went and i also everything's overpriced in it sorry sorry go on it is so right i went and i bought a book the book was um order of the phoenix embarrassing that it actually is a harry potter book but i've been working my way through the books very slowly in between book club amazing um and also this is the first one that i so i stopped reading them when i was younger at goblet of fire so this one's gonna be quite fun first three yeah so this one will be quite fun to pick up i thought goblet of fire was your first time as well

no goblet of fire i've read before when i was like well like my mum read it to me sort of thing but she stopped at this at all the other feet well this is god's room for a treat then so i'm really excited and yeah i bought that and my mood instantly changed like it was from doing something like going into almost like an intentional state of being like I am going to do something for myself buy this thing I bought a coffee as well it was horrible but I bought a coffee I had the intention of doing a nice thing and my mood was actually transformed from just buying a book and sometimes I think it does take just a small thing it's smaller than you know of like why don't you go and just have a shower why don't you go and just you're wearing something that is making you feel bad why don't you just go

and change why don't you just buy those trainers that you've been looking at why don't you just go buy a sandwich you're hungry yum yeah yum eat the space raiders three packets three packets that's an order that is a recipe so i'm gonna need some flour two cups space raiders three packets and a spoon of sugar space raiders brackets three packets three packets oh okay look let's go before i get sick yeah this has been bizarre but hopefully fun i've enjoyed have you i've enjoyed as well i'm scared other people won't have enjoyed but you know hopefully you did hopefully they'll just keep it to themselves do you know what also just on the just on the topic of stephen barton quickly oh right um the topic of Stephen Bartlett quickly oh right um so the intro of that podcast is he says I hope nobody's listening but if you are keep it to yourself keep it to yourself and I would

change that if I was him I think I would lose that well funny you say that because I actually saw a really funny comment on one of the YouTube videos of the podcast that was like um steven why do you say it's me why do you do that literally steven why do you say if no one's i hope no one's listening but if you are keep it to yourself question mark question mark what does that mean and it's like well it's just a funny little tagline yeah yeah just stupid but i don't think it's necessary but i don't think it's necessary for the time i almost feel like it works with because it's called diary of a diary of a ceo he's running with the diary vibe but the podcast is so not like a diary that it doesn't work i feel like the podcast is like a

diary because it gets very intimate yeah but it's such an intense grilling interview rather it is very personal but it's not a secret it's more about intimacy and vulnerability jay it's not about secrets yeah yeah anyway we'll discuss with steven steven if you're listening you're so hot i have some business ideas and sephi's interested in pursuing a relationship he he it just is like just i would be scared to talk to him he's just got a powerful powerful intimidating it's the same low thing yeah and i and i do see that intimidating because it's like you're very um you're a deep thinker you're and therefore i know when i leave you'll be thinking about my answers yeah and you're gonna be analyzing

but it's intense okay right so if anyone listened to this um i hope no one did but keep it to yourself dear god keep it to yourself okay um's you um all right go on okay wendy's small frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment and not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh canadian dairy it's also refreshingly cheap just 99 cents until july 14th it's a treat for you and your wallet