Goes Without Saying - off the record: nostalgia, post-uni anxiety, & 'new girl'

Episode Date: August 17, 2023

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Starting point is 00:00:40 wherever you listen to podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com Is it me? Yeah, it's you. Sorry. Goes Without Saying. You're listening to Goes Without Saying with Sefi and Wing. I'm Wing. And I'm Sephi.
Starting point is 00:01:11 This is a nice chilled loose as goose, lease as geese episode. It's off the record, it's just between us. We're talking about all the things from nostalgia, kind of there's a little bit of a sprinkling of childhood trauma in there but when is there not? We then go on to discuss uni, graduating, feeling lost, feeling like you don't know what the fuck is going on in your life it's really typical sephian wing kind of stuff i've actually really liked this one i feel like this will be a really nice one not only to listen to now but i would even go as far as to say this is a good one to revisit you get it it's gonna be so good you're gonna come back to it twice it's almost like this is one for the archives just keep this rolling in the background thanks for letting us keep you company hope you're good love you lots enjoy i'm quite excited for this we haven't done one of these in ages yeah we really thought like what why the fuck have we not done a q a for so long
Starting point is 00:01:59 like off the record record i think i kept calling it the wrong name i was calling it this doesn't go without saying which is what we used to call it big like congratulations to us if you've been there for that long sorry to you but congrats to us yeah 100 but we're doing an off the record today which is an off the record yeah we've just been nailing topic after topic that's the thing and it's like sometimes you want topics but sometimes you just want a loosey goosey for sure i'm in the middle of lisa's goose now actually i mean when am i not when am i not um anything burning to tell them nothing's burning to say oh do you know what is burning to say that i've switched phones with my sister oh yeah this isn't really burning to say but just a really weird life update um i've shown it to wing i'm kind of showing it now to the camera if anyone somewhere if anything happens with this video
Starting point is 00:02:49 yeah um but my sister's going to vegas for three weeks and her phone is cracked to the nines absolutely cracked and um the microphone doesn't work on it so she can't make calls and i was like look you can't she was like would you want to swap with me so i can have good photos and make phone calls if i need to emergency phone calls and i was like fuck it i'll switch with you for three weeks did factory resets on our phones bear in mind i had like a good phone so it's like an iphone 11 it's good but it's not like brand new um and she has like some terrible one and we've switched so now i am on the absolute like it feels so weird you need to be careful you don't get glass in your face i remember when my phone was cracked and after a while yeah i've had that on my finger yeah yeah so just be careful but it's pretty weird to be on this kind of phone again like it's got one camera
Starting point is 00:03:33 which weird that that now feels obsolete i think to switch phones is crazy it's just not ever something that would come into my mind well it didn't come to my mind until she said it she was like i've got a baby you you're definitely going to say no. She was like, you'll definitely say no. But that's almost the perfect thing to say to you because that would make you want to say yes. But I was just almost like,
Starting point is 00:03:54 I really thought about it. I was like, literally, why not? Why would you not? Three weeks of, so she can get good photos in Las Vegas. Yeah. And I,
Starting point is 00:04:01 and make an emergency phone call if she needs to, which I mean, God, I need to be able to make emergency phone calls and what three weeks of a shit phone for me it's just a detox i just almost didn't even realize that switching phones was an option it's such a good idea i didn't i never it never occurred to me but it is quite weird now it is because then she i just dropped her at the station just now and it was like i'll buy and she takes my phone with our merch on with
Starting point is 00:04:22 the if you don't assume the worst phone case on it. Oh, I would love to see that again. But lack. I know. She dropped it as she got out of the car as well. And I was like, take care of it. Take care of my phone. That's what I'm going to be saying to you when I leave you with my child, my dog.
Starting point is 00:04:37 I know. Take care of it. I know. Take care of it. I'll drop him as you leave. Don't. No, I won't. No, you won't.
Starting point is 00:04:43 You'll be good. And he'll be good he'll be on his best behavior it's fine if he's not we can chill so there's nothing apart from that burning that's the only burning thing do you have anything burning to say no just like hey thanks so so grateful oh yeah sorry i forgot about that yeah no hey thanks like i went straight in with phone yeah nothing burning for me should i just pick something at random yeah go on pick from a selection of um the burning thing is thank you so much for your questions everyone like thanks for sending things in it's crazy to read that people
Starting point is 00:05:17 know us okay i'm gonna pin these two together and it's a bit deep but i think it's an interesting conversation i've also just realized the mouse is on my face so i've just moved it um okay two of them one of one person said is it okay brackets normal to grieve the past and somebody else said how do you deal with the feeling of nostalgia when it makes you sad you see why i've linked them together i do see what you've done there very nice it's a very strong thematic link there any thoughts do you want to start well is that something you've felt in your life i mean i find nostalgia a weird emotion like i do always find it really like jarring and i do love it i love nostalgia as like a theme but i also find it sad painful all the stuff i think it's definitely okay to grieve the past like 100 that was one of the main things to grieve i think yeah anything that you're grieving it just
Starting point is 00:06:12 means that it isn't there anymore like yeah it's the past is so weird i mean i find time such a fucking head fuck anyway the fact it's relative space shit what it's you've seen interstellar comes back and his kid his kid's an old woman time man time crazy so i find nostalgia a bit mental me too for starters but i definitely definitely think you're it's the most human thing to do in the world is grieve the past same i think i spent like a large portion of my life like the past kind of few years not so much now like i feel a bit of distance from it now but i definitely spent like a good few years feeling like i need to stop being nostalgic because there was a lot of like there was a lot of sadness and like pain wrapped up in it was also kind of coming from a frustration
Starting point is 00:07:04 of almost not even grieving the past but like a lack of acceptance of things that were happening in the present wanting that to be i'm wanting to escape my life yeah and always looking back and being like oh but when i was three i had no sense of self and so my life was easier like almost having like a really rich um appreciation for like being nostalgic and like being really sentimental. Yeah. I think as a part of just like my character and I think a part of a lot of people's lives and like tendencies. And I think it's really beautiful. But I definitely had like a period where I actually couldn't face the feeling of being nostalgic because it was so upsetting and
Starting point is 00:07:46 i think the grief for the past was so strong that it was like it was really really heartbreaking and at any time i would feel like nostalgic or like a wave of kind of being pulled back to like an old memory or like a certain time where i was younger it just hurts so deeply that it's not like cute nostalgia it's like quite sickening like painful really painful and i still even now i think i have a weird relationship to it like sometimes i get things for example on tiktok that will be like little sister core and it's like yeah have you seen it's like i've seen ones that are like do you remember this and it will be like shots of like the parties that you used to have at like your leisure center all around the world they look the same and it's like cocktail sausages in a bowl
Starting point is 00:08:29 and like balloons and everything and it's like yeah why can i smell it like why can i smell the carpets like really kind of not aesthetic mood no no really not it's not it's like literally taken on a digital camera like someone's kind of capri sun and not in a cute way it's not not a digital camera in a instagram way but it no no yeah but it really hits weird way it hits like in a life yeah in a life way kind of like the kind of kid duvet cover that you had exactly that's like all bobbly and like like i can just i'm not gonna lie i find it a bit i find it a bit uncomfortable and i do wonder like the fact that i don't have like siblings that i grew up with or whatever i don't have anyone that says to me oh my god
Starting point is 00:09:09 remember when we used to have that so almost it's easier i think when you go through something on your own it's a lot easier to like let that die because no one is holding you accountable to it yeah like people don't or like you're reminded of it but not in the pleasantry way of like between someone that you love being like haha like fond memories it's almost like it becomes like a real like mythical legendary like yeah kind of haunting memory that you try and for me anyway try and bury rather than like oh yeah me and my brother were just talking about that it's like no you've just spent years and years trying to bury so nostalgia is a weird thing for were just talking about that it's like no you've just spent years and years trying to bury so nostalgia is a weird thing for me i think i think it's something i'm a bit
Starting point is 00:09:49 scared of yeah i think it also like nostalgia i think is all based on all like to be honest memory i can feel things better than i can like remember specifics that happened like i can walk into for example i walked into my old have i told about the swimming pool that i went to no have i said this no this was the most crazy experience of nostalgia that i've had in a while but i decided i'm in my hometown we know the vibes at the moment i was like right okay i'm gonna go to my swimming pool like my local swimming pool like in like the leisure center that i like learned to swim in this pool i used to have swimming lessons at school there as well like up until like whatever age you have swimming lessons like swimming cap sort of goggles time went had like my birthday parties there like it's
Starting point is 00:10:38 my swimming pool that i know but i have not been there probably like 10 years and i was like fuck it i'm gonna go or maybe like eight years and i was like fuck it i'm gonna go and the second i walked in the smell of it like i'm it hit me like a fucking tsunami from the tidal the wave machine it was insane it's got a wave machine no it hasn't got a wave machine i wish it did i wish it did um definitely does not have a way i can't believe you've only just been back no no i would be god you know i'd be surfing those waves yeah for sure um and i got into the pool like the changing rooms like the color of the lockers everything like having to take a pound for the lock like everything and then i got into the pool and this might sound like really over the top because it's literally a pool but the temperature of the water that is so specific like it's just slightly too cold but like it just hit me everything like the clock above the fucking thing like
Starting point is 00:11:30 everything and I was like I haven't felt this feeling since I was like 13 coming here with my friends like on a weekend thinking that was really cool like I honestly like the feeling that I got I was like I don't think I would have ever felt that again if I hadn't walked back into this room like I would have forgotten that feeling and there are so many things like when I go back to Brighton even I can feel the feelings and all the memories and the like love that I have there but I can't necessarily I'm not recalling specific moments yeah it's almost it's in my dna rather than in my memory i think it's really weird i always think and i used to say and i'm sure i've said it on the podcast before but i always think of memory as like gift cards which i know is really
Starting point is 00:12:17 bizarre yes i've heard this before from you but yeah you know when like someone gives you a gift card for christmas whatever i think it's like a dying thing but yeah the gift card h&m no not h&m what i mean hmv an h&m gift card god god can't wait to spend it you got 20 quid on there lucky you you go in there right h&m so random and h&m um this portion of the episode is sponsored by h& wish more than anything oh my god i wish yeah gift card say it lasts two years right yeah but sometimes with a gift card yes i remember this if you scan it say like you scan it after a year it gives you another two years from the last time that you scanned it so it almost renews like it's it gives you a new lease of life does that make sense some of them don't yeah okay so take out with your customer service person it's not nothing to do with me
Starting point is 00:13:08 but i remember like i'm pretty sure when i used to work at the body shop we would scan a gift card and then say it ran out in two years time if you came in in a year and 364 days time and scanned it you'd get another two years from that date so it constantly renews and i feel like memories are the same in the i guess a little bit different they change every time i think or at least like let's say before on the gift card you had a tenner and then you spend a little bit and now it's like nine quid now it's seven or whatever like they're always changing but if you bring them back one time you almost renew them and get like another two years memory out of them because you've pushed them back one time you almost renew them and get like another two years memory out of them because you've pushed them back into your memory rather than them just slowly like
Starting point is 00:13:49 dissipating and fading away if you bring it back into your memory you've renewed it again because it's almost like oh you were just about to forget but you've just brought it back and given you brought it back you've brought it like another year of life in your memory i don't know was it you that told me this someone told me this recently it could have been you that said like every time you remember a memory you're actually just remembering the last time you remembered that memory yeah we spoke about it before it wasn't i told you that but i think you saw it on like a tiktok or something why we speak about tiktok so much yeah but yeah if you think like your memory isn't fact it's like it's a retelling of events from your perspective yeah and that can change like over and over and over again yeah and i think then it just makes a lot
Starting point is 00:14:37 of sense for me that i would go through like a long time of feeling like i couldn't be nostalgic and it wouldn't feel good and like i was scared of it and i think i still feel a bit oh it just it's just a bit horrible just in that sense of like i think there were huge portions as well of my like there's a certain element of my earliest life i mean there's so much of it that you can literally physically never get back i always as well say like if people's parents are divorced it's like your parents or like not together or you know your parents don't exist maybe in the same way it's like your parents you literally are the manifestation of something that actually like doesn't exist in this reality anymore like you are a creation of
Starting point is 00:15:21 something that is like some sort of astrological phenomenon like you are the product of something that isn't here anymore like that is so special and weird and like such a weird almost like universal sparkly thing of like you are surviving despite such a nice way to think of it yeah like that actually makes it so nice magical and i think of like all your ancestors before you it's like it's just really special to think of i mean that's mental yeah to think of everything that had to come together just to get you here is really special and i think like yeah i don't know that's a nice way of looking at it i love i literally love that thanks i love the ancestor thing as well like that's something that is just like so mental to like when i'd see like old
Starting point is 00:16:10 family photos like on my family tree like my grandma keeps a huge family tree kind of as she would um like books and books of this fucking family tree and going back and there's like there's one about this old gardener that had a photo um not photo a portrait painted by the earl of essex or something like that like mental you are a bit royal aren't you it's like no but he's the gardener he's not the earl of essex yeah but still he knew the earl of essex he was digging up his fucking lawn i think it's the earl of essex just a random fucking word do you know what random thing that sort of my grandparents say to me um and it's like wait you had to have sex with someone for me yeah to be here yeah what yeah yeah what the garden of the earl of essex like statistically like over and over again like there's so much sex yeah
Starting point is 00:16:55 happening to get us here it's so crazy like this guy like yeah getting a bit lucky with a little lady that you liked means that what i'm here on this podcast thank you to the earl of essex i was saying this to you even like the other week we were talking about um things that we're looking forward to we were talking about we're looking forward to when we have billboards of go to that saying that are on the underground like just like ads for go to that saying on the tube yeah we can't wait and i was saying i'll bring my grandparents but the idea of like and i've said it before but like even we were talking like a couple of weeks ago and i'm sure we spoke about it on the episode of like my nan so like on my mom's side both of my grandparents came like to london as immigrants in the 60s on my nan's side she was literally i mean they were both like i was gonna say scum of
Starting point is 00:17:38 the earth but like they were both like but like both my sets of families had a similar experience i guess but like we were talking recently about my nan literally my nan like she's still here she's alive and kicking like i can look her in the eye she was telling me we were talking like just the other week about how she would eat her fingernails because she was so starving this like peasant child on the street and now it's like the cheek of your granddaughter to like sit and talk into a microphone like it is wild to think about or like my dad's parents not being able to speak english and like just just crazy things i think that's so iconic that bring us to where we are is so special
Starting point is 00:18:18 i think yeah it really is and that's why history is just everything like it is so mental it really is it really is so that's our thoughts on nostalgia next question baby that's a good one though yeah already bizarre yeah but i liked it or did you not it's like who thought the earl of essex would get a shout out not me not me i've never heard of him in fact no i've never heard of him but i know i have seen his portrait. No, his gardener's portrait many a time in my life. Wendy's Small Frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment. And not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh Canadian dairy.
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Starting point is 00:19:51 ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. ACAST.com Okay, I like this one. Am I going again or do you want to reel us up? Yeah, no, go for one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, go for one. I like this one am i going again or do you want to reel us up yeah no go for one yeah yeah yeah go for one i like this one just because i think it just hits so hard this person said my master's is done in three weeks congrats master's done in three weeks and no idea what
Starting point is 00:20:17 i want to do slash who i am when i'm not a student oh perfect you're in for a process okay you are in for a process you probably as well like you you might even be a little bit accustomed to the process because you've gone and done a master's which yeah trust me i get it like yeah it's i think a lot of people have the itch in them to be like i can always do a master's though like you know it's always on the tip of my it's always like the master god forbid i'll either cut all my hair off or I'll go and do a masters. Oh, 100%. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:48 It's almost like a masters is, oh my God, it's just always. A lifeline. I'm only a couple steps away from being like, I'm going to afford it. I don't know how I think I'm going to be able to fund this masters that I'm apparently going to do. Oh, I really see myself doing a PhD one day. Definitely. If the world doesn't crash and burn i will do a mark i will do a master's it goes out saying i almost i view it as like
Starting point is 00:21:10 in a really sick way of like almost like sonic it's like you've completed the level but you didn't collect all the points like you need to go back and collect all the coins like you like you completed the game but you didn't get four marks like you need to go back and like fill in the gaps yeah anyway congratulations it's not like work i know we're making it sound like it's a piece of piss but it's not it just feels really appealing i think to do like a year really intensely i was actually thinking about um the idea of a history master's i was actually gonna say it in that last conversation that like history is everything i was gonna be like yeah you need it history masters yeah you do you should you should do a little bit of that when you're
Starting point is 00:21:48 like i would love to do something like you know interesting but yeah you're in for a bit of a ride now i think i think coming out of any system you're in for a bit of a ride like it's a bit of a breakup in certain ways like you now have to go through the process of rediscovering who you are without the support of that institution which is weird and it is jarring or we found it weird and jarring yeah to speak for us yeah definitely definitely found it weird and jarring to say the least but it does end like it's not actually you do get through it like it's not like oh my god it's the worst thing ever it's like oh you just readjust and you just form a new identity it's fine like you will do that over and over and
Starting point is 00:22:24 over again throughout your life forming new identities it's just one of them something my advice would be also to like hold on to the sense of achievement in doing it because i feel like yeah even with like literally the biggest milestones like getting literally a master's degree people love to just like brush it under the rug for you like yeah you need to make the effort to celebrate your achievements because no one's throwing you well maybe you you do have a couple people were throwing you parties but in the grand scheme of life no one's like booking in scheduling in like three hours on a friday evening and saying this is when we're going to celebrate your thing of this this and this or like yeah no one's making sure you like go and get yourself a nice coffee in the morning because even just like resting literally like it's your responsibility
Starting point is 00:23:09 to schedule in yeah all the things that you need and that includes like giving yourself lots of love and like praise for the achievement and like the thing that you've just been through it was definitely one of the big things we experienced wasn't it where as soon as you finished you have that summer and have that summer and during that summer like people don't even allow you the summer everyone's on your fucking back what's next what are you gonna do blah blah blah like and it's actually like god i've just been in this thing for three years and if you went and did a master straight after four years i mean let me have a break like two months of summer is not going to cut it like no i need to go and now
Starting point is 00:23:46 think about what i want to do like basically don't expect the answer to come to you overnight of like oh i've finished my masters and now um i have clear answers because your new identity offered like it's tempting to go straight into the new identity of like and now i am whatever the job you get yeah it's like why don't you just live without the identity of like and now i am a whatever the job you get yeah it's like why don't you just live without the identity of like the institution or like the job or whatever like backing you and just think like who what do i want to do where do i want to be right now you might not want to be someone that has a label to it because that is also one of the one of the things i think the trap of everything is you kind of go through the life with the labels and that's that's the comfort
Starting point is 00:24:25 really the comfort is you have a neat label of student to give to yourself and then the temptation and also there's like a huge financial need to get the next thing but like that aside a huge thing aside it's tempting to go into a quick thing so that you've got the new label of oh i'm a blah blah accounts manager of blah blah blah you've got something to respond on people say so what do you do people say oh amazing blah blah i think actually one of the huge skills or one of the i don't know one of the most amazing things i've learned is that when you don't have the label to give to people it is really uncomfortable and you actually find it quite jarring to be able to be like i'm
Starting point is 00:25:05 not really doing anything because i've just fucking finished i'm a master's bitch what have you been doing but i do think i should just like lean into that discomfited just allow yourself to be yeah chilled yeah i think as well like the idea that um do you remember we used to say um everything i once desired from others i give to myself now that age old thing but maybe we should just do that to ourselves like yeah everything i once desired from others i give it to myself right now now yeah because i think in the in the way of like oh you're looking to not you particularly asking the question but like we as people or like even i look to like institutions for example like oh i'm a student that's my label it's almost like sometimes i think it feels um
Starting point is 00:25:53 like unjustified or like sometimes it feels unjust or unfounded or like silly to give yourself a certain title you feel like you need to earn it or be given it by somebody else and actually i do think a lot of the time especially if it's something that like isn't always handed to people on a plate it's something that you need to go out and give to yourself i i think a lot of the time you have to tell the world who you are like you have to introduce yourself as what you are otherwise people will never know like i always used to like this is a really dumb example but almost like let's say i never knew you were into badminton at the moment yeah it's almost like be loud with like like don't be shy with your interests and your skills and like don't be shy about the things
Starting point is 00:26:41 that you're passionate about because when they come around in your life if no one knows that that's relevant to you they will literally just pass you by and so for example now sephie's into badminton let's say i never knew that because she hadn't told me about it multiple times and someone came to me and said hey badminton tournament like i'm gonna go like do you want to go blah blah could have come and gone without even mentioning it sephie because i had no idea that she would be interested like don't be shy with letting people know what is meaningful to you and like where you want to be not at the same time i think like don't let people's evil eye get to you but still no i also think if you don't tell people who you are the absence of yes that confidence tells people who you are you're actually sending out the message that you are someone that doesn't know who they are that can
Starting point is 00:27:32 be shaped by other people that doesn't have any specific interests and all of this stuff like even the not saying who you are is telling people it is and it's telling something that's wrong as well because really nobody is someone with no interests and nothing about them literally nobody even the people that i've met who seem so far from someone i can relate to when i actually dig through actually do have the fucking things to say they're just often too scared to say them so you are actually just sending messages that are like inaccurate and horrible about yourself by not being um sort of brave yeah in who you are really it's a really hard thing to do to like come out and tell the world like oh yeah i'm gonna do this thing because
Starting point is 00:28:16 a lot of the time it comes with a lot of delusion yeah and actually funny i should mention delusion i'm just gonna go straight into another. Yeah, let's do it. Congratulations on your masters. The best topic. Somebody said, well, spoiler alert, what is the most important thing that the other person has taught you? And I was thinking, what can I say that I haven't said a hundred times over before? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:39 And I do think the fact that we've got to live through some level of like, making delusion real yeah it's taught me a lot about like just do it i just do it just be embarrassing just just do it just like do you know what i mean be deluded and just have fun and be silly that's what i've learned from you and like from we've given that i think we've really given that to each other in a way that we gave each other the permission to be embarrassed because i look at you and if people were slagging off your thing i would think fucking freaks for slagging her off like they just don't get it they don't get it and then to put myself with that it's like oh okay so what they're slagging off our thing freaks i don't care i don't care yeah it doesn't matter yeah like i do think the balmingness of having not only someone else beside you but someone that
Starting point is 00:29:31 you respect and love and think is great and has got nothing to be embarrassed of and it's so cool for doing the thing i think it's so balming to place yourself amongst that because it's like oh look i have it too it's kind of a scam it's a scam so i think finding people that want to do the same thing as you that also you respect and all of that yeah i think it's like oh it does kind of give you that confidence it's kind of um you're um say it you're gonna wear a risque outfit to the party a bit of oh god this is an embarrassing thing but you're doing it with your best mate oh well no one's gonna fucking laugh at her or they're dead meat they are dead meat if they laugh at her so it's fine and even if you're not doing the same thing i think being having the mentality matched of like maybe we're on different paths but
Starting point is 00:30:23 i am excited for your destination as much as you can see it for me and like that sharing a vision that isn't necessarily like going in the same direction but understanding that like you just support it you support yeah you just you have support and like i think as well like we have like it's almost like i'm always going to be an arsehole to myself and i would never in a million years think the same way about sephie and so being able to do something with somebody else and being in the same boat it does bomb you but also the idea of like we have so many limitations that we place on ourselves of like that's a ridiculous thing to ever say that you could want to do like that's so stupid that could never happen like blah blah blah i think when you're surrounded by people who feel that way
Starting point is 00:31:09 in themselves they will just naturally project it onto you and that's just how life goes and we do it to each other all the time yeah and it's a part of life so i think having people that are going to back you is really important even like if it makes you like weird or like silly I was thinking about that period of time that we had I was living in Portugal at the time and it was just after uni we had just finished you were living at Jack's house and we would phone for hours at a time it was hours a day we had it twice though i think we had it in lockdown and we also had it there was a period that i was at the farm as well the farm jesus christ i was at the farm my dad's house in portugal um and i'm really in like my family lingo and which makes me sound really privileged
Starting point is 00:32:03 guys it's like a it's like it's not a farm there's not a working farm it's really like not a farm um and there were two periods and we both we would phone for hours before lockdown there was one before lockdown when we just graduated as well because i remember because i was staying in a tent in his garden which really puts it all into perspective i don't remember this at all yeah i was living in a tent in his garden which really puts it all into perspective i don't remember this at all yeah i was living in a tent and we would phone all the time but i remember we were really in a god sorry this is my sister's fucking phone going on you can't put it on silent is also one of the issues with this phone like okay no i have managed oh no it's just turned off again she said
Starting point is 00:32:41 you need to turn it on silent mode using a needle it's like thanks thanks oh my god um but yeah we were i remember we had two kind of periods where we were really like well we i'm with the whole way through but i really remember it being in portugal on the phone to you and like it just felt like such a time where we it was just the delusion coming through at all points and we'd be on the phone for hours and we'd pretty much have the same conversation every single day about oh my god like this podcast is so cool like we just i just genuinely remember feeling like it was the biggest coolest most incredible thing in the world and literally we probably had about 50 no less i reckon probably less probably less who's 50 listen there's no one there no there's no one there there's no one that's a lot of people there was no one no there's no one there and oh that actually
Starting point is 00:33:31 makes me want to cry yeah and i can really feel it that's fucking nostalgia like i can feel that time so much and i think just the gift of having to do that getting to do that not having to have to at all go getting to do that with you like the the amazingness of doing something you love is everything but the amazingness of doing something you love with someone that you love who also loves it yeah are you kidding like it is so special it's such a joy it's actually just such a joy to do it's so weird it's such a weird thing to do and to find someone else that wants to do it in the same way that you would want to do it is mental we hit the jackpot we we've had some sort of shared vision there was some sort of magic happening that day genuinely yeah when you actually put it like that it's like i don't know how this happened yeah that's nice oh you know what i was watching yesterday new girl and oh let's do this yeah it's
Starting point is 00:34:31 not even a question but i'm actually i'll tie it back into like what's something that i love about you the most or that you've taught me or whatever i only watched new girl because you told me how great it was everything and like obviously i've gone through my whole life seeing new girl here and there but really like if i hadn't had listened to you i wouldn't have watched it and i was i had it on yesterday and i was like you know what i am so glad that you watched i watched new girl i'm so glad i'm really grateful that you made me that you like encouraged me to do that i was actually talking about new girl yesterday and i was saying like i have the i have the weird like i have such
Starting point is 00:35:10 an obsession with i think the zoe de chanel as jess is the most stunning you can look in life basically it's literally you no but i think it's me because i've based my whole look on her like that's the problem i know i have blonde hair right now but no but i almost think even regardless like i think we're drawn to people but yeah but also like i was told by my friend like at a very young age the first series had come out i think the pilot had come out and this this girl my friend was like to me you really remind me of jess so i think i've always i went into it seeing myself as jess sort of thing so i've loved new girl like an extra amount because i think she's so cool when stunning and someone said i reminded them of her such a compliment um but i've always i just love jess so much like i just fucking i love like let's just do who's favorite character in new girl oh it's schmidt it's always
Starting point is 00:36:00 schmidt because he's he's perfection and i always think to myself if i met max greenfield right that's his name who by the way was at the eras tour the other day was he i i think good for him i saw he's in some new sitcom at the moment is he good for him yeah he's also in promising young woman he is a great character i i think like there's no other actor that i think i would actually feel like i don't want to meet you it's too much you know how people like with cersei from game of thrones like she would get like some abuse from people on the street like things like that i'm not gonna abuse schmidt but almost like schmidt as a character is so big douchebag yeah put it in the douchebag jar
Starting point is 00:36:41 is it douche jar yeah can't be douche bag jar maybe it is douche i was literally watching yesterday where they say it anyway i can't think of what it is though um not that i'm gonna abuse him but like almost that character is so perfect that i just almost like i really struggled to separate that that's like a real life human being yeah and it's not schmidt that's mad isn't it yeah because i'm not really like that like i'm i think i'm pretty good at like being a normal person and being like that's the fucking actor like go over it sort of thing yeah but schmidt i really can't get my head around like because it's almost like that's in order to portray those jokes so well you must
Starting point is 00:37:25 like you have that in you so like it was for you this is why i always think about new girl i really want to know i know a lot of it's improvised but i want to know how much of that was written beforehand and how much they're playing around with i specifically want to know how much those characters were written before the actors were chosen because no schmidt is such a weird character yeah that there's no way that was written on paper without that guy max greenfield coming in and putting that sort of quite camp energy onto it like there's no way that it's kind of quite a straight but like queer coded guy that loves fancy things but also is like super sentimental and emotional but also used to be obese so has this whole relationship it's so how much was written before
Starting point is 00:38:13 and like winston as well who used to be my favorite character yeah oh yeah right so who's yours how much was that written like his character changes so much so it's like um i've completely forgotten the actor's name lamorne morris yes i like you only see these things in the credits but it's like or like that little opening hey girl yeah it's like how much was he putting on to that like he must have come in with a fucking ferguson angle because that was not written for that character that no there was a lot so weird i've i've in my research of new girl winston really grew throughout the series based on what lamorne lamorne put in wanted yeah yeah love winston love love nick let's have a moment for nick miller it's too much nick miller everything the weight of the love the weight he's almost i mean we've spoken about this in our private lives many a time he's almost to the point of like i'm so in love with nick miller that it like makes me sad like
Starting point is 00:39:15 it's almost like i can't watch any interviews of the actor i've gotten his name as well jake johnson i can't watch any interviews with him i can't think about him existing in the real world because the idea that nick miller doesn't exist and he's not with me i.e jess same person in my mind i can't deal with it it's dangerous isn't it it's too it's too real a love i i mean i love it for you like i i love it for you as well perfectly i see it for you as well it's just it's the perfect show it is the perfect show thank you for giving me that well thank you for watching it i don't know what i would have done if you didn't it's everything now are you ready oh sorry yeah
Starting point is 00:39:55 just another little bit yeah do you know the weird bit that made you want to watch it it's so weird the quote that i gave you that was the nail in the coffin i don't know the final straw on the camel's back yeah the thing is the thing that made you watch it is i did an impression of the girl that i think schmidt goes on a date with her and she's like mcmouse i love all things american like mcmouse i love mcmouse mcmouse was the thing that got hooked me you know what as well david fincher mcmouth the first time i really it really really got me i really laughed i was like god i'm really laughing at this show and i remember i said it to you and you're like that's really funny it's a bit where they're in the car
Starting point is 00:40:34 and cc and schmidt are in the back of the car and cc's like get your hand off of my leg and schmidt is like no your hands on my leg and she's like no it's definitely not and schmidt says oh classic he said she said i love it i love him she said i love that show i love it too um let us know if you want us to off the records like a bit more regularly like yeah because it could i don't know it could be like i would love to do situation it is lisa's geese isn't it it's a bit nice i think it's fun to have no pressure and and be able to talk about schmidt if we want to talk about schmidt because let's be real when do we not want to talk about schmidt yeah always a big part of our lives always all right like not
Starting point is 00:41:21 every week is topic week but like it's not not in my head love the topics but I would love to be able to have the leastness to talk about me too Nick Miller Ferguson come on
Starting point is 00:41:31 Sweetie Pie King R.P. right if you don't hear from us assume the worst you

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