Goes Without Saying - the emotional reset: your year of rest & relaxation

Episode Date: November 16, 2023

how to 'self-care reset routine mental health morning hot girl walk' the anxiety away.join the conversation every monday & thursday.shop our merch: sephyandwing.co.ukspeak your mind on the @sephyandwing instagram.`https://podfollow.com/go-love-yourself Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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It's very sincere. It's a little bit off the cuff. I think we're speaking quite frankly and just keeping you company basically it's very sweet and cozy put us on in the background let us follow you along on your day we talk about the things that we like to do in our alone time to like have intention to recharge and not just sit around rotting in bed like little goblin girls um i hope you enjoy i hope this finds you in a good place we're sending lots of love i'm a bit nervous why just to be real with everyone we've just had a bit of a false start i feel like we've gone through some yeah we always do but that's we tried something we had to take it away we're starting again it's funny though because you started the first one being

like oh this feels nice and now it's like the second one's i feel stressed it's like oh god yeah i was just saying how wholesome and like cozy i felt and so excited for the episode and now i'm like i feel a little bit anxious about this um i don't it's good yeah no it'll be fun we're kind of going for the vibe of like keeping you company amongst all of the shit on planet earth we just want to be there for you just a little bit of a comfort podcast talking about don't just leave that blank i don't know what to put in talking about stuff we're talking about today how to relax though which i think is needed i would love to know god i would love to know well here's the thing i am relaxing these days go on give me your relaxation routine.

Because it seems like you have one. Oh, I wish I had one. I wish I had like a proper routine. That is some things. But like routine. Oh, I just want to be someone with routines. Come on. Like routine.

What I'm not. What I don't have that I feel like doesn't qualify me as a routine kind of person. Is when I'm doing something. I'm not doing it. And it and then i'm like right now on to the next thing i feel like i almost do things by accident or like i end up doing three things at once do you know what i mean it's like oh i'm i'm brushing my i don't do things in the same order like i everything's always a mess i feel like when you have a routine it's like you know that you wash your face and then brush your teeth and then make a cup of coffee and you've done it like that for five years do you know what i mean but i think it's like i go for a walk every day as many of us do go for a walk every day that's

part of my daily routine no no absolutely not the same time like it's in no yeah there's no um sort of steps to it there's like after i get dressed i go for a walk with my coffee there's none of that but i know that routinely every day yeah i go for a walk yeah that's like that is kind of a long-term habit that i didn't even realize i had no i do think going for a walk though is kind of the best oh my god it's the best one you could do it's the best thing to have i do think as well sometimes when you've been keeping up with the when you've been doing it i just need fresh air i just need like a change of scenery i just need whatever if you go a day or two without doing it or even like if you go a few hours in the afternoon it's like oh i need a bit of a need to be outside yeah i need to just shift up my i i was really thinking like as a kid i would i mean i'd walk to and from school but like

when i would get in or like at the weekends it's like i would often not leave the house like i would get in and just stay in and not have any desire to leave but i don't know if it's like a thing of growing up or anything now but i actually like desire fresh air it's like what is that that sounds like my grandma coming out of me well i feel like it's also because probably you realize how much you enjoy it so yeah it's when you know that you want to do it whereas when you were younger it's like you didn't necessarily you hadn't had any experience and maybe it's kind of weird for a 13 year old to be like i'm going for a walk it's like oh god what's wrong it was definitely in our in our generation of being 13 it was definitely like it was a bit of a statement that you're walking yeah you're having you're going

for a walk whereas now i think that was a thing like oh but uni we'd be walking all the time no but we'd never just go for a walk i remember you're joking well maybe we did but i for example you would never go for a walk on your own i would i went for a walk once on my own at uni and i was having a great time but i got about three different texts from my housemates being like are you okay is everything okay i think that's the thing with like living with people because i agree with you i feel like i was going for a lot of walks at uni but you're probably right i feel like on your own is different when you're living with people you're around people especially when you're around people

that you're friendly with it's almost like if you go and do something on your own it is a bit of a statement it's like oh you've gone without me because you know i would have gone with you so a lack why am i not invited sort of thing and it is a statement i want to be on my own leave me alone it's very much a statement i wanted some peace and quiet i wanted some time to myself especially that's like sometimes when your time becomes like communal with people it's like when are we having lunch when are we waking up when are we gonna go for a walk when are we gonna go to go into uni like it's such a weird thing your life is so communal that's at that point i remember i would like have

a really nice time in the living room with everyone and then i would go into my room like everyone's like okay bedtime now like night night sweet dreams and i would go into my room and i would be like wired i would be up for hours because it was hysterical time because it was hysterical times i had so much adrenaline left over and i i also think i was kind of doing that um kind of like time rebellion procrastination. Yeah, exactly. Like I was kind of doing that thing of like, now I've got this time to myself, what can I do?

And it's like, I would sit up and like just do weird, do you know what I mean? Like just make use of these extra hours that I had on my own. I'm definitely someone who like balancing the time with other people and time on my own is huge for me. Yeah, I get that. Too much of one or the other really fucks me up i i don't know i think i've been realizing because i grew up in a very communal environment i think i really do thrive when i'm around people which is so weird

because i think i've always identified as an introvert because i've always been desperate for that time away from people where there isn't someone knocking on my door it's not like you have to come and load the dishwasher now or whatever it was yeah and i shared a room with my sister for like a huge proportion of my life i i feel like i've always felt like i'm so introverted because i'm always desperate for it but actually if i think about the times i'm happiest yeah i do think i love that living really communally like being involved in like a a community of people i really really like that even though i do think my alone time is really necessary and god like if i've been around people for too long i do need to go and recharge 100 but i notice that i feel

better not not when i'm around any old people but when i'm around people that i know and i love and i trust it's fulfilling i do find that really relaxing the crux there to me personally is like time alone is really important to like recharge and whatever do all of that shit right so like i kind of just zoomed out for a minute and i was like time alone really is important to recharge it's like oh i hate yeah it's almost like um i hate i'm icking myself it's kind of um podcast 101 it's like are we in our pilot season oh we are but i can't help it it's also it's fucking true what i'm saying is true yeah anyway true it never goes it never gets old this stuff never goes out of style. It never goes out of style. That's what I say,

famously. But it's true. Time alone to recharge is really important, but I think the crux for me personally, and I think like similarly to what you're saying, is when you've got time alone

for an extended period and there's not necessarily an intention to recharge. I feel like an extended period of alone time with no intention of recharging stagnation equals bad boo bad vibes bad times yeah i completely agree with you that it's the lack of intention because almost like totally when you're going into it like this is nice and

you're making almost your environment nice you're getting your cup of tea you're kind of making your bed and it's all nice but don't you know it when it's like i'm living in squalor i feel like shit i need to see someone but for some reason i kind of hate everyone right now like i haven't shouted like oh i can't deal with it yeah they all hate me and they're all everyone hates me now assholes anyway as of 24 hours ago when i decided i was gonna spend today on my own yeah and then the second you leave your house go for your walk wherever it is it's like oh there is a world out here like everything is okay like i just needed like the the person at the bus stop to be like hi and it's like oh yeah i don't

hate everyone bit of perspective um well that's nice yeah it's a nice little start hear about your relaxation routine even though you deny one. Well, I would love... I just don't know if I qualify. Anyone out there with a routine, let me know if you'll let me in to the gun. Well, go on. Tell me the steam room thing then. Oh, I'm loving the steam room. Wow.

Thanks for bringing it up. So basically, I now have access to a steam room at the gym. Oh, boy, oh, boy. Boy, oh, boy. And a sauna. But I haven't actually tried the sauna. So I thought i didn't like the steam room and i think i don't like the sauna so i'm yet to try this one but i will go in one

time i was gonna go in but it was out of bounds not out of bounds it was out of order it wasn't yeah unless you want sudden death or whatever he says. Unless you want to die. Is it a painful death? Yeah. Something like that. Don't tell a load of kids that, you maniac. It's so strange. It's like, right, now time for the feast.

Yeah. Just so you know, in this castle, somewhere you can go is a very painful death, I think he says. And the staircases change, so you might end up there by accident. So you might get lost. No big deal, though. See you in place tomorrow night so weird bye um yeah growing up i i think i i would feel like a bit of a dragon in the sauna like i would almost feel like like it's so heavy on my chest i can't breathe i can't breathe like it's kind of stressful i think that's too hot it's hot it's too much um but i haven't tried it since but i i am loving the steam room very much

i'm actually quite intrigued because i recently my brother has started going to the sauna to the sauna yeah we talked about this the other day this guy goes he absolutely loves it and i'm i think i've always had a similar thing to you i've never put it in terms of the dragon but almost like i do agree well almost like i'd be counting down the clock and i would be like like i can't and i would be with people and i'd be like i need to leave i need to leave like i can't last any longer like i'd be really counting down. Like, how can I leave this environment without making a fool of myself? Yeah, no, I agree. It feels horrible.

It feels like I'm going to die. I don't like it. It's intense. But I'm thinking I'm going to go. Yeah, I think you should try it. Because I think when I try the sauna, I'm hoping that I'll be surprised. Since I handled the steam room like such a fucking champ, as I should. I almost think it's like, it's coffee, it's wine. It's like when you're a child it's not hitting and then you get to olives as

a kid you don't like them oh i loved olives delicious well good for you yeah that's that's the vibe that i'm thinking but i was starting off my mornings by going to the steam room have you ever heard of such a luxurious life um absolutely delightful yeah my brother and then and kind of just like the idea it was almost i would have a bit of a meditation in there i'd be really thinking like everything is leaving my body like i'm sweating and i'm like i'm shitting everything is leaving my body i'm vomiting yeah but like yeah i'm getting everything out like a cleanse a cleanse and then showering after and i do feel like i feel like i speak about showers and like baths and getting in the sea a lot but i'm very much i would like to be submersed in water

at all times do you know what this is what brings me right on to what i was going to say is my relaxation at the moment is i have been going with my friend i went last night and we're going to go again tonight to our like almost like the swimming pool we learned to swim in like it is like a leisure center swimming pool and someone we knew works there so that we went to school and he lets him for free last night oh that's not an hour and we would do it it was like it was called like swimming for fitness nine till ten and obviously i don't fucking swim for fitness i'd rather be sick than do that it's disgusting don't shit all over something fun please i was flipping and flipping and flipping like i could do something handstands i'm kind of picturing you coming out of the water like a dolphin

no honestly i thought we looked so good we were doing all the different strokes that we hadn't done butterfly kind of um your goblet of fire harry you got your gillyweed honestly it was really that i've just killed harry potter it was really gillyweed weird times and when we came out we like got dressed we had like wet hair coming out the it was it was just so wet and then the guy was like you look like you're having a good time in there but she's gonna get here in 40 minutes she's gonna be here we're going again yeah nice and i've never felt more relaxed actually than being in like that pool it was so weird like all the signs were the same as they were when i

was like six like every single thing is the same awesome and sweet i really love that it was so weird i think what happens in the community center swimming pool stays in the community center it does i've had many a party that i actually think this is a bit of a separate note i guess but i do think often um or when i think about i'm touching wood being lucky enough to have a baby one one day not right now but you know one day i think i would like to have well if i could have a baby in water if i could have a water water birth yeah that is appealing to me agreed i saw a video of a sprinkle of glitter oh yeah um she did like a home water birth and oh i think i've seen that

yeah i should have vlog of it and i thought that doesn't look like the worst idea like birth as a thing doesn't look great to me it doesn't look good to be honest yeah but that doesn't look too bad i just love the idea i'm the thing is i can't really swim that well but like I just love the idea. The thing is, I can't really swim that well, but like... Can you? Well, I can swim, but like, I feel like for the amount that I... Maybe we should go tomorrow. I would love to.

I feel like the amount that I love swimming... Well, should I bring my... Yeah, definitely. Anytime you come here, I feel like you should bring it anyway, just because you never know what's going to happen. Yes, but we should... You never know what's going to happen. I might push you in the pool.

You never know what's going to happen. Yeah, we can go to the pool. Yeah. could i do a handstand in that pool though uh yeah but your legs would be sticking out it's quite it's uh you can swim in it it's shallow so like you would i mean yeah you could do it i just love that feeling where where you do a handstand but if you flip around you know that belly feeling if you go over a hill really fast i love that feeling maybe even vaginal feeling some may say well we were talking about it because we kept doing flips and then we were like do you remember those like noodles that you would sit on as a kid some people yeah woggles and you'd kind of be like slightly they're all like chewed up yeah no 100 and it was like oh my god like we were little kids in this pool with like

those noodles that are in the corner like it's actually grim to think about because it's also like i feel like the noodles the pool noodles the little foamy things that existed when we were children are definitely still being used today on the side 100 it was the same ones wendy's small frosty is the ultimate summer refreshment. And not because it's cool and creamy and made with fresh Canadian dairy. It's also refreshingly cheap. Just 99 cents until July 14th. It's a treat for you and your wallet.

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wherever you listen to podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere a cast.com i learned to swim with that don't you think driving down like a kind of get going into the underpass and it's like wow why is that in my vagina i can feel it like almost in my womb it's no no it's it's in the womb a hundred percent because it's in the belly isn't it it's in the belly because there's a ride at thought park that i believe is called zodiac that gives the same feeling the belly flipping oh that flipping yes i love that belly flip it's such a like like you're almost sick speaking of thought park oh go on lots of

love on the thought park birthday video is there on instagram have you seen not at all i haven't seen i actually saw somebody said that your um ticket that you made me go over to the instagram right now no you can do what you want this is a command guys yeah when you get a minute have a look on the instagram if you're interested because um there's a really fun video of sephi being really sweet and like planning a birthday surprise for me spoiler we went to thought park you've probably seen it was so good pieces yeah we've been speaking about it um and someone said people have said literally the nicest things but what i'm holding on to is somebody said that your ticket that you drew um is giving nick shower and do i not say that to you all the time

it's the highest of confidence to me guys like i do what i made someone a sign today i'm working at this cafe at the moment guys yeah yeah i'm working this cafe which is a community cafe all surplus food that was going to go in landfill and i said i'm gonna work there guys i love it um absolutely love it there and there's a guy there maybe i won't give his full name but he's called something the it guy who's like has a bit of a pop-up that he does and i made him a sign today and i wrote it out in bubble racing i drew a picture of a laptop and a phone and stuff on a big board for him someone said that looks like jacqueline wilson books and

i thought god i definitely have that style yeah you do I love that you must have been massively influenced by Nick Sharra it makes perfect sense big time I think nothing looks better than a Nick Sharra illustration well there you go giving yourself the highest compliment you don't know what nothing looks better than than your work because I actually once made these like collages that you can see them on my Instagram somewhere. And someone said Tracy Beaker vibes. And I thought, oh my God, this compliment is too much for me. What did you do the other day?

Oh, it must have been the ticket that I said Nick Sharrett. But I say it all the time to you. Yeah, Nick Sharrett. Oh, dreamy. You are Nick Sharrett. I'm almost like. I love that. Take your face off.

I'm Nick Sharrett. Oh my God. I would love to meet one day 100 i was searching through loads of jacqueline wilson books the other day because i had this image in my mind of a picture of a shop or of like a hair dye bottle or a shampoo bottle drawn by nick sharrett of like and the girl's hair was like waving down this i just had such an image and i was like is that real or is that from my mind like i was searching through all the books i couldn't find it so i might have come it will be out there somewhere it will be if anyone knows this illustration i think it will be in

clean break somewhere that's the best one clean really is really good if your parents are split up i love that we both read clean break at a similar time it's so sweet yeah um starcross lovers we are but i also read the illustrated mom at that time and that's giving me my favorite tattoos i actually was laughing oh we should say we should say um that we've switched management technically just to follow our manager to a new why should we say this why wouldn't we say this i just don't know what's wrong with you why would this not be allowed what why do you act like we're like their dirty little mistress like they're gonna post us on their instagram okay okay okay yeah well i imagine they will there's i always think public information this email is going in our

bio actually that i need to do do you know what it is it's because you don't hear other people talk about their management and stuff they do all the time i think are you allowed to are we gonna get like they literally talk about their management all i'm looking around for help it almost feels like do they want to be mentioned on this i don't know why we haven't named any names casper lee i now speak directly to you well anyway i brought this up because we're so happy about changing management anyway and also um it made me laugh speaking of the illustrated mum is basically a jacqueline wilson book for kids about from this is this young girl and her mum has loads of tattoos loads of tattoos yeah and sephie famously has a phobia of how would you put it um i wouldn't say i have a phobia of it i have an aversion i i

get sometimes scared of some tattoos and i think it is from that book and basically when wing got a tattoo i came into the shop with her um so for you i'm not gonna you're massively underplaying this no i know because i didn't get to it yet when wing got her tattoo i came into the shop with her and then i said i'm gonna come for the placement and stuff but i'm gonna have to leave before yeah which is fine go go away but i would never want you to be a but but if you are scared of tattoos some but the process of someone getting tattooed the thought of the thought of you having a dot of tattoo on you no i couldn't do it and the thought of someone in your family no see do you see what i mean it's almost like why are you trying to um what's this what

the show you're putting on this character no i'm cool i'm tough i like i like this is the weird thing i can you can appreciate yes i get that yeah i like a piece you're not a hater i'm no oh my goodness no i think that's clear i think that's clear you just you have you have a something here's yeah yeah i have a lot a lot of something but i think for example there are ones that i really like like i can look at some little cute tattoos me like yeah i really like that and for example the first one i saw that i was like i really like that emma chamberlain got a little rat and i was like i think that's really cool i'm getting the vibe i like a lot of this um patchwork tattoo vibe that people are getting

right now i like it but the thought of it being on my skin oh my god i'm so scared of them i used to be really scared of the other illustrated mom there was an episode of sabrina the teenage witch where they go into a tattoo shop and the tattoos on the walls are like talking terrifying and i i've just oh they scare me yeah yeah it's just fair the shops is the tattoo shop scares you yeah and i was laughing because um on our previous like onboarding stuff like we had to say like oh like he's vegan like dietary requirements like if any brands come forward that want to do weird things like this we're not into x y and z yeah and um i was really laughing because on

yours it said polo tops and in brackets you put absurd i know that was that was for phobias i'm i that is i'll come out with that and then you said tattoos and tattoo shops yeah and tattoo shops my phobia yeah but i i would that one i was hesitant to put on polo tops is an actual phobia of like i'll be sick if i see one almost like they i see them often and they scare me heavily and that is weird i'm glad i put absurd i know on that you did i think you said sorry like i don't know it's so embarrassing because i don't want the person doing those things well exactly it's embarrassing filling those things out like i put spiders and i was like so embarrassing it's like so vulnerable i actually said to sephia the other day it's really like if you've ever been in like a group chat for

like a work like christmas do or whatever and it's like yeah here's the menu like everyone put in what you are ordering it's like i'll have the duck pate for starter why do we all know like what we're ordering what your tastes are it's like yeah i'll have the lambs don't judge me i don't want to know that you're getting the soup like no yeah i don't know it's private like can't we order in private why do i have to fucking tell it to the admin of the whatsapp group it's so humiliating it's almost like if everyone come forward one by one and announce that you're going to be having like a spiced pesto aubergine no i can't be doing that can someone please let me know if you find that embarrassing because

oh everyone will find it's something i think about often it's excruciating oh well i hope that's relaxed everyone is that the end of the episode are we doing that that's i guess i guess do one little let's give a little more so more surely go on then oh i don't have anything to give neither and i feel like it's a nice closer person okay cool yeah let's not give you've had your film yeah don't get greedy now all right cool thanks for listening yeah thanks for listening if you don't hear from us if you're looking for a new podcast recommendation we have just the thing go love yourself is an award-winning podcast hosted by best friends laura and lauren and they are the pros at handling complex and sophisticated topics but bringing loads of

lightness and familiarity warmth it's hilarious and moving at the same time it's everything that i want when i'm on the bus walking down the street i'm in my music video i'm laughing i'm crying they cover themes from self-love body image i just listened to one about being child free which was very interesting recent episodes include barbie mania and body image and single life and how to love it so i'm hooked instantly immediately yes immediately yes if you're looking for more conversations on body confidence and self-love and how to get there, Go Love Yourself is the podcast for you.

We always need more conversation on confidence, self-acceptance. They talk about how diet culture took over their lives, but now they're unlearning everything they've been taught about body image, acceptance and self-confidence. I'm ready to learn from the best, to be honest. Go love yourself, girls. Listen every Tuesday with Laura and Lauren. Enjoy.