Good Life Project - To Earn More, Don't Just Ask, Believe.

Episode Date: February 15, 2018

Want to get paid what you're worth? Don't just demand it, believe it.It's a question I'm asked often by everyone from employees to entrepreneurs and private practice professionals. How do I raise my rates, earn more money, get paid what I'm worth?Part of it is a marketing principal—"price implies quality." Raise your rates, ask for more and people will start to see you as someone worthy of that amount. It's all about perception, they "file" you as a higher-caliber performer because the price or salary you're asking is that of someone who is worth it. It's quality "by association."BUT, that's only half the equation. The other half is about belief. And, if you miss this part, you can raise your fees, ask for more, demand a raise...and none of it will matter. It still won't work. Nobody will buy you're worth it until you do. That's what we're talking about in today's GLP Riff.And, on in our Good Life Science Update, we're exploring the alarming relationship between noise, especially traffic and city noise, and heart disease. Turns out, city dwellers and traffic marauders may be at a higher risk of heart attack or stroke and many other diseases. We'll explore this phenomenon and some new research on what may be the underlying causes. And, as always, for those who want to go to the source, here's a link to more.-------------Have you discovered your Sparketype yet? Take the Sparketype Assessment™ now. IT’S FREE (https://sparketype.com/) and takes about 7-minutes to complete. At a minimum, it’ll open your eyes in a big way. It also just might change your life.If you enjoyed the show, please share it with a friend. Thank you to our super cool brand partners. If you like the show, please support them - they help make the podcast possible. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ever notice that if you go and decide one day that you're going to raise your rates, that you're going to demand a higher salary, a bigger raise, more compensation, or just more from somebody else in any part of your life, that when you do that, the fear that you had of people completely rejecting you very often is not met by people rejecting you, but is met by people saying, what took you so long? We will happily give you everything you're asking for. And if you don't get that response, everyone to what's really happening there, because you know, you're worth it. Well, it turns out there is something beneath this phenomenon that is really driving it. That

may not be so obvious. And I've had some experiences in conversation recently that brought this to bear, and I wanted to talk a bit about it. And that's where I'm going into today's Good Life Project riff. Along with that, in our weekly Good Life Science update, we're diving into some kind of fascinating new research on traffic noise and how that affects your risk for heart disease.

So city dwellers or people who are around a whole bunch of noise, maybe even loud office noise during the day, take note, you will want to hear this. The Apple Watch Series X is here. It has the biggest display ever. It's also the thinnest Apple Watch ever, making it even more comfortable on your wrist,

whether you're running, swimming, or sleeping. And it's the fastest-charging Apple Watch, getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes. The Apple Watch Series X. Available for the first time in glossy jet black aluminum. Compared to previous generations, iPhone Xs are later required.

Charge time and actual results will vary. Mayday, mayday. We've been compromised. The pilot's a hitman. I knew you were gonna be fun. On January 24th. Tell me how to fly this thing. Mark Wahlberg.

You know what the difference between me and you is? You're gonna to die. Don't shoot him. We need him. Y'all need a pilot. Flight risk. Okay, so here's the deal.

I've been an entrepreneur for a whole lot of years. I've also worked in big companies or massive government organizations, bureaucracies. And there comes a time in everybody's sort of work existence where they want more, they know they're worth more, and you want to be compensated for it. Maybe you're an employee and you're thinking to yourself, I deserve a raise or I deserve a bigger bonus. Maybe you are a private practice professional,

a therapist, a coach, a yoga instructor, a physician, whoever it may be. And you know you've been doing this for a long time. You know you've gotten really good. You know you're worth a lot more than you are charging, very likely, because you haven't raised your rates in a really long time. And very often that is based on a massive fear that people abandon you because that's the most important thing. So here's the interesting thing about that. There is this concept out in the world,

and it's in the marketing space, called price implies quality. But that's not the real truth. So what does that actually mean anyway? Well, if you look at certain products or services, you will actually judge the quality of those, not just on how they taste, how they look, how they feel, you know, the nature of the solutions, their ability to actually deliver on what's promised, but you will judge based on the packaging, based on the price, right? So if you have two bottles of wine side by side without labels on them, and you tell one person the bottle on the left is a $5 bottle of wine, and the bottle on the right is a $50 bottle of wine. And then you give them those two bottles of wine. In research, we know that the people will tell you the $50 bottle tastes better, even if those bottles were actually reversed. So price literally changes people's experience

of something that they buy or that they're given. It implies a certain quality and your brain buys into that quality. That goes for people too. So in the context of you being an employee somewhere and wanting to be paid a certain amount of money, right? How much you get paid or how much you ask to be paid implies to a certain extent, the quality of what you're giving. If you are a private practice professional and you put rates out, public rates per hour or retainer, the level of those rates will imply something about the quality of your service. So for example, if you're charging $100 an hour, people who want to work with the absolute best and have money to work with the absolute best, if the absolute best in your particular field

charges 500 to $1,000 an hour, they will look at your $100 an hour. And even if you are just as good as those top-notch players, they will not even give you the time of day. Why? Because your price is so far below what they expect to pay for extraordinary quality that they assume you are not that person. And they will assume there's something either wrong with you, or you simply don't have the chops to be paid at that level. And they literally will eliminate you from their consideration. But here's the interesting thing. That is not the entire truth. The whole price implies quality thing is the surface level rule in the context of you getting what you're worth. I was recently having a conversation with

somebody who I mentored a couple of years back, and we've stayed in loose touch. And what's interesting is that conversation happened at nearly the same time as a second conversation, which was almost identical. And it went something like this, hey, how you doing? Let's catch up. And then during the conversation, this person said to me, you know, I want you to know, you know, like a couple years back, remember, I was really struggling. And, you know, I want you to know, you know, like a couple of years back, remember I was really struggling and, you know, I'm trying to figure out how to fill my private practice. And I was at this level and I knew it was kind of like on the lower side of the market. And I pretty much doubled my rates one day, woke up and doubled my rates one day.

And I have a packed private practice now. And this person said to me, I had no idea. All it would take would be to literally double my rates. And I had a similar conversation with somebody else who took a couple of years to get to that point, all within a couple of days. And my response was this. On the surface, you're right. On the surface, it's the old price implies quality argument. But people's expectations who want to work with somebody who they assume has that higher level of qualification, that higher ability to deliver

on an outcome, that puts you in the game of them not immediately closing the window or the door on considering you, whether it's at a company, an organization, a nonprofit, or you're looking to build a private practice. But here's the thing, that doesn't close the deal. That only keeps you in consideration long enough for the real game-changing experience to happen. And what is that game-changing experience? Well, it is the shift in your own internal belief system that allows you to say, I am going to charge X times more than I was charging before. It is the shift in your

willingness to actually stand in a value proposition, your ability to say, you know what? Oh, hell yeah. I've been doing this a long time. I have my 5,000 or 10,000 or 15,000 hours in. I have this history. I have a track record. I am able to deliver on particular outcomes. I know this. I know it in every fiber of my being,

in the nucleus of every cell in my body. I know it because I've seen the outcomes and the track records that I have delivered consistently in the past through different organizations, different employers, different projects, different clients, whatever it may be. And when you can stand in that place, when you make that deeper shift in belief, that shift, not just the manifestation in the form of increasing your prices or your salary demands,

that deeper internal shift in beliefs and willingness to stand publicly in your capabilities, that is what people are responding to, not just the change in price. The change in price lets somebody say, okay, based on what this person is asking me for in terms of compensation, yes, they must be a player at a certain level. But if you then turn around and they say, okay, let me talk to you for a hot minute, and they sense immediately that your internal beliefs do not support the price that you are placing yourself in, it's game over. It's end, right? There is no further

conversation. You don't have to say anything. You will telegraph it. So if you put your price up there and you're tepid about it, and you truly don't believe that you're worth it, they will feel it. It will resonate negatively and they won't believe it. There will be a cognitive dissonance that happens. They won't be able to resolve it, but they will know something is wrong, whether it's a proposed client or vendor or company or boss. They will sense something's not right.

And it doesn't matter if you're asking for more or charging more. You will never get what you want. The shift happens when you do the work to develop the skill, the craft, the capabilities, the track record, the history, the proof, and then do the internal work to create the shift in mindset and cultivate the belief that says, oh, hell yes, I am worth this. And then when somebody gets past the price and has a conversation with you, you are able to stand in that value when you were in conversation with them. That is what is really going on here. Price implies quality, especially when we're talking about employment or personal service.

That will keep you in the game, but it will not close the deal. It will not even come close to that. That will not get you the salary you want. It will not get you the value you're worth. It will not pack your private practice. The internal game, the belief shifting, the standing in capabilities and proof, that, that is the true game changer. And that's the seed I wanted to plant with you today. So I hope as always, you found that valuable. I like to try and bounce between the three different buckets, connection, vitality, and contribution. And this is pretty squarely focused in the contribution, the meaningful work side of our three buckets. Because I want you to get paid what you're worth. And I'm pretty sure you want to get paid what you're worth too.

That's what I'm thinking about. Play with it, work with it. And let me know how it goes if you experiment with this. Really excited to know how it goes if you experiment with this. Really excited to share our science update with you today, especially as a city dweller, because we're going to be talking about traffic, noise, and heart disease. The Apple Watch Series 10 is here. It has the biggest display ever. It's also the thinnest Apple Watch ever,

making it even more comfortable on your wrist, whether you're running, swimming, or sleeping. And it's the fastest-charging Apple Watch, getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes. The Apple Watch Series X. Available for the first time in glossy jet black aluminum. Compared to previous generations, iPhone XS or later required,

charge time and actual results will vary. Mayday, mayday, we've been compromised. The pilot's a hitman. I knew you were going to be fun. On January 24th. Tell me how to fly this thing. Mark Wahlberg. You know what the difference between me and you is?

You're going to die. Don't shoot if we need him. Y'all need a pilot? Flight risk. And welcome back to today's Good Life Science Update, where we geek out together on the intersection between science and various aspects of living a good life. This is where I share my geekery about studies, research, science that in some way touches on our ability to fill one of or all

of our three good life buckets, contribution, connection, and vitality. As always, we will share a bit more information for those who want in the show notes. Today, what are we talking about? We're talking about something which actually is deeply interesting to me because I am a city dweller. I live in the heart of New York City, Manhattan, where something like a bazillion people and a quarter bazillion cars and trucks and buses and all sorts of other things that create traffic and noise go whizzing by all day long. And a recently published review in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology took a look at the relationship between noise, environmental noise, especially road traffic and other stuff, and heart disease. And this is a little bit concerning for a noise-d dwelling person like me. As I sit here, I'm actually sitting in our recording studio in New York City, where as you guys know, long time listeners, it's usually

super quiet with the exception of the occasional siren or super, super loud truck backing up and beeping or something like that. But that is also because, you know, when the one window of this studio, we actually have four layers of acoustic glass and all sorts of soundproofing blocking this stuff out. But if I were to open that, what you would hear would be radically different. So I'm going to go ahead and do that for you in just a second so you can hear the difference between the studio and then what normal noise would be in my New York City apartment. Here's the studio.

And here's what it would sound like with the windows open in this same room. And here's back with the window closed. Now that was up on the fifth floor, and that was very, very quiet on the street that is amplified dramatically. And here's the thing. It turns out that apparently researchers have known for quite some time that traffic noise, especially the noise of city or the noise of traffic, cars on highways and traffic and beeping horns and stuff like that, actually has a negative effect on your risk for heart disease. But nobody's really known really quite how that happens. So researchers decided to try and figure out what physiological epidemiologic changes, what evidence can we find of noise-induced cardiovascular

disease, and what might be the cause? What would the noise, what would the relationship be between traffic noise and heart disease risk? Because we know apparently that it increases your risk for heart disease. And they think they may have come up with a bit of an answer. And it is in the form of what this noise does in terms of stress induction in your body. Turns out that if you look at the changes in chemistry

in your body and physiology and nervous system response, that there's a really strong argument that says that the sustained level of traffic noise actually sets off the fight, flight, or freeze response. It activates the sympathetic nervous system in your body. And that is, you know, actually really healthy and really good when it's activated on a really short-term basis. It's the thing, it's the classic thing we all learned in high school, you know, that if a tiger jumps out in front of you, or if there's, you know, mortal danger, or you need to have a superhuman strength to run really fast, or be super capable of things, that this is the system that pulses changes in chemistry through your body that lets that happen. And that's really good every once in a while. And if you immediately use all that chemistry to do the things you need to do

and have it dissipate quickly and return to normalcy. Problem is when this same thing is being triggered by high levels of noise and then it's being sort of kept there on a sustained basis, well, that stress response, that sympathetic nervous system activation and all of the chemistry that it releases through your body can lead over time to things like hypertension and diabetes and oxidative stress, meaning literally like your insides start to rust and all sorts of things that start to really affect your cardiovascular system and the health of your cardiovascular system. And scientists believe that the relationship then between this noise and heart disease comes from the fact that high levels of sustained

traffic noise can trigger sort of this sustained sympathetic nervous system activation, which courses these chemicals through you, which become massively destructive to nearly every system in your body if they're sustained over time. So what does that mean? Well, what do you do about that? That is my big question as a city dweller. What am I going to do about that? Does that mean I'm going to move so I can kind of live out in a bucolic park-like place or go out to the suburbs where I can open my windows all day every day and just hear the chirping of the birds and the rustling of the leaves. Maybe. I actually really like that. What's interesting is that I don't really notice

the sound in New York anymore. You habituate to it pretty quickly. But what's kind of fascinating is that this and some other research shows that while sort of cognitively, I may habituate to it, meaning I don't really notice it anymore. I'm not consciously aware of the sound for the vast majority of the day. My systems, my subtler body systems may well be aware of it and may well be affected and triggered by it on a level that I'm not aware of. And the damage that's done can be real. So... Mayday, mayday. We've been compromised. The pilot's a hitman.

I knew you were going to be fun. On January 24th... Tell me how to fly this thing. Mark Wahlberg. You know what the difference between me and you is? You're going to die. Don't shoot him! We need him! Y'all need a pilot. Flight Risk.

The Apple Watch Series 10 is here. It has the biggest display ever. It's also the thinnest Apple Watch ever, making it even more comfortable on your wrist, whether you're running, swimming, or sleeping. And it's the fastest-charging Apple Watch, getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes. The Apple Watch, getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes. The Apple Watch Series X, available for the first time in glossy jet black aluminum.

Compared to previous generations, iPhone XS or later required, charge time and actual results will vary. What do I do about that? Well, I can try and change the internal noise in where I am, but I can also try and do. So I'm not wearing them now, but I have actually two different pairs of noise-canceling headphones. And when I wear them, it's kind of like the world vanishes away. I got them first because I use them to fly

because the ambient noise in an airplane, for short-haul travel, it's not such a big deal. But if you're traveling a bit longer haul, you'll notice that, at least I notice, I tend to land a bit disoriented and agitated. And part of that is because of the sustained, very high levels of noise that are in the plane. And my noise canceling headphones do a fantastic job of eliminating the vast majority of that. The other thing that they let you do is if you're then listening to music or podcasts or anything else through those headphones, and this is a less than obvious thing, they actually not only tune out a lot of the outside noise and traffic noise and the buzzing and chaotic and stuff, they allow you to listen to whatever is the signal in your

headphones at a much lower volume because that signal, whatever it is you're listening to, no longer has to compete with the ambient noise. So have you ever had this experience? You're walking down the street listening to headphones and it sounds like a perfectly normal level and it's not too loud. But then the moment you get inside, you realize that you're actually blasting your ears at a really high volume because you're compensating. Try and make up for the ambient noise, very often the loud, chaotic noise outside so that your ears can distinguish what you're listening to from that noise. And once you get into a quieter space, you realize how much you're truly assaulting your ears.

And now we know your brain, your auditory centers and potentially triggering that destructive sympathetic nervous system response. So something to think about. We have many ways to actually control the level of ambient noise in our worlds these days. And if you know that being in sort of loud, traffic-y, chaotic city noise

over a long period of time can have a detrimental effect, not just your mood, but to your physiology, maybe start to think of ways to create intentional moments that lower the volume, forgive the pun, on that noise to let your body come back to baseline, to reset a little bit and come out of that fight or flight, that low level sustained fight or flight state and

recalibrate into a calmer, healthier place. That's what I'm thinking about as I think about how I interact with and live with noise in a city that I am not planning on leaving in the immediate future, but I do want to live more graciously and gracefully. And hope you found that helpful. As always, love to share whatever it is I'm discovering in the world of science and how it helps you live a good life. I'm Jonathan Fields, signing off for Good Life Project.

Hey, thanks so much for listening. I'm Jonathan Fields, signing share the Good Life Project love with friends. Because when ideas become conversations that lead to action, that's when real change takes hold. We've been compromised. The pilot's a hitman. I knew you were going to be fun. On January 24th. Tell me how to fly this thing. Mark Wahlberg. You know what the difference between me and you is? You're going to die. Don't shoot him, we need him.

Y'all need a pilot. Flight risk. The Apple Watch Series 10 is here. It has the biggest display ever. It's also the thinnest Apple Watch ever, making it even more comfortable on your wrist, whether you're running, swimming, or sleeping And it's the fastest charging Apple Watch getting you 8 hours of charge in just 15 minutes

The Apple Watch Series X Available for the first time in glossy jet black aluminum Compared to previous generations iPhone XS or later required Charge time and actual results will vary