Green Light with Chris Long - Beach Trip. Adrian Peterson vs Le’Veon Bell. Kyrie. Mailbag: Chris & Fax's Office Jobs & KMF - De Niro Characters.

Episode Date: June 28, 2022

(2:06) - Thoughts on the Repeal of Roe vs Wade. (9:38) - Juuls outlawed, Chris’ First Cig and Nate’s First Dip. (30:00) - Beach Review: Best Waters, ‘Middle’ of the Dinner Table and Which Song Would You Play on the Aux in a Family Setting? (44:30) - Kyrie Returns to the Brooklyn Nets and Spurns the Lakers & Knicks. (54:30) - Adrian Peterson vs Le’Veon Bell and Celebrity Fights. (1:03:30) - What We’re Watching, Podcast Edition: Dumb and Dumber, Ozark Season 4, Elvis, Alone Season 9 and Hustle. (1:31:30) - Mailbag: KMF: De Niro in Meet the Parents, Raging Bull or Casino, Office Jobs for Chris and Dr. Fax and Coach Code Breaks. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light Tube YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/GreenLightTube1 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. https://www.greenlightpodcast.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Tennessee, y'all, 2. 1-800-9-9-7-89. Welcome to the Greenlight podcast. Oh, boy. Folks, today is a whole bunch of fun. We're going to talk the beach. We're going to talk Adrian Peterson versus Levy on Bell. We're going to talk Kyrie.

Talk the banning of jewels. Some movie and television combos with Dumb and Dumber, Hustle, and Ozark. And Yukon people sent in a mailback, so we'll run through that. First thing you hear, though, is a little serious. Chris is going to give his thoughts on the recent Supreme Court decision. All right. So Monday was a shit show, guys. I apologize. This is my apology from from boss man here. We didn't get the pot out on time.

Part of it was because of what I'm about to talk to you about. Part of it was just because, you know, I was travel was all messed up and whatever. You don't want to hear it. The pod's going to be fun, I promise. This is like my Facebook page sometimes. I've said this a few times. First off, I don't think what I, what I'm saying matters. I don't think I'm any better than anybody. I'm not trying to be sanctimonious. I'm not trying to win the outrage Olympics. I'm not looking for a good job. So please don't tell me good job for, for being Captain obvious here. But the fact that we're talking about a woman's right to choose in 2022 makes me feel like

we're going backwards. It makes me feel like we're going back to the dark ages or something, especially in light of the fact that after Roe v. Wade got overturned on Friday, Clarence Thomas is walking out and talking about contraception and gay rights. They'll make a run at those things. They will. So I'm going to use my Facebook page today to talk about how fucked up I think things are. And of course, you can scroll.

You can scroll down your timeline. I know some of you have Twitter and Instagram, and that's how you share your personal beliefs. But, you know, because I'm nearing 40, I went with the Facebook metaphor. But I'm assuming if you're listening to this pod, you're either a woman. And if you're a woman, I don't want to assume you agree with me,

but I'm assuming most women agree with me. And if you're a man, I'm assuming you probably agree with me because most of America doesn't think what happened on Friday was the right thing. this wasn't some popular vote. This was decided by a bunch of people that got appointed, not elected, and who are going to sit there for 20 to 30 years, just gathering dust, country run by old people, God, and money,

and all three of those things are at play at once here. I mean, those are the things that run our country. Make no mistake about it. Two of them, not necessarily even real. Old people are real, but they're not going to be here a while. So, like, I don't think the framework for the operation of America is going real well right now. And, you know, if we look back at a constitution that's 250 years old, when you really say that out loud, that that's governing the way we do things right now, I think it's wild. You can say, look how long it's sustained us.

Well, not that fucking long. It's 250 years, man. Look around. You know, look around. And I think that that's what I would say to people this morning. before this pie. Look around. Look around at the world and look how many countries are outlawing abortions. There's go get your little country place, Matt, and look around. There's hundreds of countries. There's like 20 something that outlaw abortions. Okay, if Clarence Thomas had his choice,

we'd be joining the 60-something nations that criminalize homosexuality. We're going backwards. And I should just say this off the top. You know, we were talking about this. We have two choices. podcast and address this, or we can just not because we don't want to be a downer. Everybody already knows about it. You don't need to be beat over the head with it again today. I mean, it's kind of framed our entire week as it should. And I could assume you know how I feel, but it's important to me because you spend a lot of time listening this podcast, getting to know me, getting no Mac, getting no Reed, getting no Nate, getting no making and all the guys on this podcast. It's a bunch of dudes. It's important for us to let you know how we feel.

and where we stand. And I'll just say this. Number one, I see you. Like, if you're a woman listening to this podcast, I see you. Like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's like this. I know it can feel like you're probably invisible because men are largely silent.

I've been silent because at times I've assumed that people know how I feel. I think we need to be better. And men have had a hand than the blueprint of the world that we're living in right now since the beginning. So this is a men problem. I sat here and I started to say it's important for us to start the show this way because of the women that are listening.

And that's true. Yeah, it's important that y'all know where we stand. It's important to me. But it's also, it's more important, actually, that there's a bunch of dudes listening to this podcast. That's why it's important to say something is if you're a dude listening to this podcast, I'll assume that you're like most Americans.

You probably think that what happened Friday is moving backwards. but if you don't, maybe take a second to consider another perspective and maybe take a second to research all the really legitimate reasons that a woman might exercise her right to choose. I think that would help. Guys, we have to be better. Hey, in the sports world, we have to be better. Joe Burrough stepped up this week and said something.

I know a lot of guys have said something or tweeted something, but I just have always felt like this when it came to racism and that's something we should have talked about. we did talk about and a lot of guys did choose the sideline in that discussion, which I think was a shame, but there was an inherent pressure to say how you felt. And it became like a binary thing. Either you're talking about or you're not. And if you're not, we'll assume something.

So there was a lot of pressure and positive reinforcement in your workplace to walk into a building full of your peers who a lot of them don't look like you. And if you say something supportive, if you use your platform, like there was a positive. reinforcement there, you know, especially later on in that conversation. You know, the NFL was in the spotlight during the racism talk because it's one of the most diverse, you know, places in America to come to work. And we had the Colin Kaepernick thing and the whole thing. So there was no hiding. The NFL right now sitting in the shade. Like the NFL really doesn't have to do anything. NFL players don't have to say anything. Pro athletes don't have to say anything. But as like some of the most celebrated men in the world, rightfully or wrongfully,

like dudes love dudes that play sports. How about some of the dudes playing sports say something when it's a women's issue? And we've fallen short on that. So I apologize. And I think, you know, somebody like Joe Burrow did a really good job of that. Joe Burrow probably alienated and pissed off a lot of people that really like him. And I don't think he gives a fuck because I think he gives a fuck about what's right. and I think that's what more people should be into.

So we need more voices. Men, I don't know what we need to do. Let's go look for some directives, right? This is going to be a long battle because of this fucking gerontocracy, Matt. That's my $100 word for the day because that's one third the governing body of the United States of America

is old people. Then it's money, then it's God. And we saw all those at play on Friday. And I think it's I think we're going backwards, man. I think there's a lot of countries if we saw that they were doing the same things. As I said, look around. Look at your peers. Like, look at who you are.

Find your comp. Who is our player comp? I think it'd be enlightening to look at some of the places where we cross on the crossover on the Venn diagram with some of the countries that we really detest or that we wag our finger at because we consider them barbaric or antiquated in the way they do things. like we're kind of looking like that. We're putting a little bit of a lipstick on a pig here in this country right now, you know, with all our money and our resources and our sports and our entertainment

and all that stuff. But like, this place is going backwards. So I'm ashamed and I'm sorry. This pod kind of reminds me of like, if you're in the NFL, we were both in the NFL. Back in the day when you had a big game or maybe it was just a regular game, nothing on the line, just regular ass, regular season game. Then you had a short week, you get a Thursday night game, and that Thursday night game, you get your ass kicked, right?

You just get the doors blown off. Like you're doing things that are not fundamentally sound on tape. There's people that are taking the week to rest their bodies without saying it outright. You know what I'm saying? Like, one of those games. We had a lot of those weeks. It didn't have to be a short week in Jacksonville. As did we in St. Louis.

but when I got when I got on good teams later in my career I I learned about a letdown game like when you're on a bad team there's no such thing as a letdown game I know what you're saying because you're constantly just fighting to survive yeah but when you're on a good team and shit's going too well you're like um you're like the dad and Teledega nights who we were just talking about like that's me with this pod today dude things were going too well we had PFT on Friday I thought we had a great great pod. We walked out of here. We were like, that pod was fun. It was awesome. Everything just kind of fell into place. Yeah. Are you on your Snapchat? No, I'm not. Speaking of Billy Football, Billy Football wants to come on the show Thursday. This Thursday. Yeah, you know who he is, right? Oh, I can't wait until he gets here. Well, he's not going to physically come here. That's the letdown. I don't think he's allowed to leave New York City. I was just saying that, you know, Billy Football is coming on on Thursday, which means we have a guest for Friday, and we don't have a guest for today. Like, Billy was like, I'll come on on Monday night. And I was like, I have a guest Monday night.

Oh. And I was like, why don't you come in? You know, come away. I guess we could just call Billy football and see what he's up to. But no, I'm not ready for that, dude. I don't know if Billy was shocked at the intentionality that's going into the pod that we're going to do. But when he texted like Monday and I was like, no, let's wait until Thursday. I want to be more prepared. I bet he was surprised by the fact that I'm pretty excited about having him on. I say all that to say this dude. We are fucked dude. We're up shits creek with no paddle. I was in New Jersey all weekend. I was at the beach with my family. It was awesome. Coming off that big win, we went on vacation the whole thing. Like I'll be back. We got a

biweek. I'll be back on time. Dude had all these travel issues ended up in an SUV today driving from ocean city new jersey all the way down to charlesville came in this thing just smoking man like just exhausted and then we have a guess problem you know it happens i'm trying to talk about roe v wade and i'm getting fucking worked up i'd do like six takes of that motherfucker we're i've been here an hour dude but look the good thing is we're we're trained for this this is like sudden change you know sudden change like in football hey things are going well you're driving down the field you're driving down the and then someone throws an interception. And you guys are thinking we're about to score.

Okay. And all of a sudden we're back on the field right now. Sudden change. Kyrie Irving ops in. We got nothing to fucking talk about, dude. How about that? I had like a page of notes that was just about possible Kyrie Irving destinations. And that was going to be the bulk of our current events, sports talk.

Somebody actually called us on this shit, dude. I was on Twitter last week, as I am, and I saw a guy in the mentions under our shitting in the water social, which is a real sentence that I just said, are shitting in the water social. It's called CBCD. With PFT, we were talking about shitting in the water. What's it called? By the way, someone in the comments that is called C-Biscuit. That's the act of shitting in the water. That's pretty funny.

PFT called it an aqua dump. Well, it's an aqua dump is how I know it, and PFT knows it. But anyways, somebody in the comments was like, tell me there's no sports on without telling me there's no sports on. And that's where we are, ladies and gentlemen. So like we're here. It is what it is. We're not going to bail on you.

I could easily go home. I've been banking interviews so that, you know, July, we could take some time off. Well, here I am fucking up your Monday night. I'm not going to burn one of those interviews tomorrow. We're going to do a podcast that's current. Okay. We're going to talk about what's going on right now. And that ain't much.

We don't have a guest. I just solicited the good people of Instagram for a mailbag. They're never disappointing on Instagram. Twitter, not so much. Twitter. Something about Twitter people, they can't think of mailbag questions. Twitter, no. Can we rewind?

Rewind a little bit. I want to give props to Billy Football just for a second. For him, he has strung up a new month. marketing scheme. He wrote that list, made it public, did not have an appearance set up for this show and now

has an appearance set up for this show. He's calling his shots. He's a smart kid, which is why he needs to redirect some of that intelligence. And maybe we can talk to him Thursday about, you know, just try not to get suspended in the future. But to post

to be so smart and be here. How did that happen, dude? But to post that. And it's so funny for him not to have an appearance lined up and to make that public. No, he's playing chess, dude. Billy football is playing chess. We're just playing checkers. But we'll get him on the show soon. But me and Nate, we're going to make chicken soup right now.

So I guess we could start with everybody's weekend. Did everybody have a good weekend? People at home are like, fuck, they're talking about their weekends. I know Reed went to the beach also. Reed, what beach did you go to? It's called Barefoot Beach in Naples, Florida. My grandma bought me a plane ticket on Thursday at 7 p.m. I was here and she was like, what are you doing this weekend?

Damn, dude. So this was an impromptu beach trip. Yeah, no, I did not have it planned. And she was just like, she called me up. What are you doing this weekend? And I was like, I don't have anything planned. She was like, you want to come hang out with me? And I said, no problem.

My brother was down there, saw my two cousins. It was pretty mellow. Florida is a wild place, but it was a good time. Hung out on the beach, got some sun. You had no, full of old people, hell of old people, but it was a good time. Plenty of food. We ate seafood. Yeah.

It was wonderful. How was your beach time? Did anybody assault you for slandering their favorite actresses? Like any of the women on the beach? Yeah, their favorite actresses. No, I was not assaulted. I threw a couple RIP Betty whites out there, but it wasn't picked up. Yeah.

No one picked up on it. Well, they couldn't hear. Right. Very well anymore. Not your grandmother. I know she's sharp as a whip or whatever they say. But some of the other Naples, Neapolitans. Right.

And I call them. Is that correct? Any beach. Yeah. What is it Neapolid? It's an ice cream. I know that. No, it's not.

Neapolitan was, it's not just an ice cream. I think it's a place in Italy. Like if you're a Neapolitan, you're from somewhere in Italy. Naples, I think. Naples, yeah. Holy shit. You guys are. gaslighting me just stupid not gaslight any any frisbee throwing on the beach yes we

tossed a couple of biscuits on the beach we threw some plastic you see any cold breaks on the beach i saw a tent on the beach i thought of reed there were a hell somebody's in there on this beach evidently fornicating yeah i guess yeah they're all fornicating on this beach uh no code breaks that i saw there were some sneakers some people were running in sneakers What is your SPF a choice? Is it SPF? That's right. Okay.

What is your... We're going to be up there in the triple digits, Nate. What is that mean? I mean, white people get a lot of skin cancer. Does it go to triple digits? I've only seen 70. I got 70 of my last trip. Oh, it goes to triple digits.

Mine is in scientific notation. Wait, what is that mean? In my neighborhood, it goes. Are you serious, though? Yeah, dude. What's the highest have you used? You're essentially with those. You can get 100 if you get like specially made for sensitive

of babies, which is all I'll use. Which is all of us. That's hilarious. Yeah, I was reading about the leading causes of death in the car for, for why? American men? Well, it was just on my timeline. It was like, hey, if you're an American man, you might be having a lot of fun, but not for long. I read that article. I live eight years longer in like, in like Norway and Japan and all those places. So it's eight years. We drink excessively and have lots of stress and don't exercise.

Yeah, dude. And here's the, okay, so back in the day, when I'd hear that we were like losing a year or six months to like Japan or something or maybe my statistics were fucked up. I was like, that's not a big deal. Like losing a couple months of your life over a lifestyle isn't a big deal. But eight years, man. Have you seen the show like, I think it's called 100 Ways to Die. Have you ever seen that? No. I think for content, that's what we should do and do reacts to that because you like stuff like that. You think about stuff. And it's like all like, it's like a hundred ways to die. It's like a lot. It's like a hundred ways to die. It's like a lot. It's like a. a show that's like real ways people died but it's like I think about that you think about that people be like yeah that wouldn't happen and you're like no no I can see this happening you'll see name a thing I probably thought about that realistically happening it's not like I live my life much differently but uh you know I'm definitely thinking about things like lightning strikes more than others my girlfriend seeing a bear crossing the highway getting off the Richmond exit about four days ago. See, but that's not going to bother me at all because we've talked about this. Black bears, I can't remember the last time when killed. I think, uh, I think the Ramirez twins have killed

since a black bear killed someone, dude. So they don't kill people? Dude, they're, they're weak. But anyways, I'm lightning strikes, more sensible things I'm afraid of. Lightning strikes, like a falling branch. Statistically, that kills a lot of people. But according to this article, it's mostly heart disease. so you want to watch mostly everything you're doing right now as an American man dude the only thing for me is I was like well you know like I do smoke a joint a day or two joints a day

it's good for your heart you exercise at least I exercise but I was like if I'm hitting my vape pen that's not doing anything technically because the next tweet in the chain. It's got some asshole vaping and I'm like, so that's

the new age way to die for an American male is vaping, dude. At least guys look cool as fuck, killing themselves back in the day. Like smoking a cigarette on a steel beam that's hanging 300 feet above like the New York City skyline. That looked dope to rip a dart

when your guy was it, Len Dawson was ripping a dart and that looked cool, dude. Really cool. Yes, that was killing us, but it looked fucking cool. Vaping doesn't look like a cool way. James Dean with the cigarette hanging off his lip. Put a jewel in James Dean's mouth.

He looks like a fucking, he looks like a simp. I'm worried about what's going to happen to all these people just going to have to stop Jewel in cold turkey because they just took it off the market. You know, Nate, that's a really good thought. And like jewels really, when they hit, like, and what you're saying, as you're saying, it doesn't look as cool. For a lot of people, it did look cool because jewels, like, Like, they were all over.

Like, and it's... You gotta watch out for these jewels, man. I think it was marketed to the younger crowd. You can't just sweep the rug out from the jewelers at once. It has to be like, there has to be a national action plan. Like Joe Biden has to launch a national de-escalation plan for jewelers. And it started... It's got to be like a month.

And then you have like, how do they... Well, and for you fiends out there, you can still get it because the jewel company asked for an appeal. so they can still sell it while that appeal is going on. So hold on, Nate. I know hold that thought. But like, what the fuck is a jewel in actuality?

It's just a, it's a vape, but it's a, just with nicotine. It's a certain type of pod, but I think it was the initial one. I remember that got, that got like all the kids and everyone really hooked.

Yeah. And they started like the flavor, the flavor rush and having the different flavors, which really got everyone hooked. And they first. Yeah. flavoring cigarettes and they first like they did with the cigarettes and the blunts and stuff they cut out hey you can't you can't sell any flavors yeah so they were just selling menthol or whatever

flavor and it still is running ramped and i think now they're trying to shut it down all the way but i don't know we're we're going to see if it goes anywhere but i'm worried to see what happens like hey if people can't if it's something you know how they do fruits and that sort of thing they flavor sigs and they flavor darts with like you do like a or a blunt with a certain they never go like terriaki that is true it'd be delicious i know we can't do that anymore but i feel like we really could have cornered the market on like that's so funny you said more savory jules you know what i mean like why stop it a strawberry that's a great point i think blunt wraps you can still get flavored right yeah maybe terriacchi flavor yeah

Somebody needs to hit up white owl and said I need a terriaki fucking banana banana. So yeah, dude. Anyways, man, I don't know what a jewel is. I remember somebody was like, I was vaping and somebody was like, is that a jewel? And I was like, fuck you. Do you think I would smoke a fucking little electronic cigarette? While you're vaping, though. Yeah, I know.

It's really like a little bit no different. I know, but mine's mine. getting, I'm getting THC in mind, not just nicotine, bro. Go pack a dip like a fucking, like a man. When I was teaching, I used to like have to go to parent symposiums about jewels because it was like this crisis for all their kids. It was not really a big deal. Bro, we were dipping. Now it was cherry, Matt, but we were way ahead of these kids now. Like, we could definitely kick these kids asses. They're jeweling. I remember I had Copenhagen straight. for a stretch in high school.

And these kids are vaping. Oh, I just remember something. Packing your first dip? Yeah, you started. I gave you your first dip? You absolutely did. And I threw up in a bathroom. I'm my official visit, had to hide in the bathroom while everyone's playing Madden,

competitively out there, having a good time. You're listening to Brian Westbrook catch a touchdown pass. People knocking on the door trying to get in to use the bathroom during a party and I'm the guy in there. I'm using the bathroom. Yeah. In there throwing up my guts. The buzz is good, huh? That first one?

It was too good. I was sitting in there watching you guys play Madden with redacted Aisa Chapman. You can't say redacted. It doesn't say the guy's name. And I just remember everyone in there playing and I'm saying. sitting on the couch. And the last thing I heard is make sure you don't swallow any as a little bit is falling down the back of my throat.

And like five minutes later, the room just starts spitting. You look like the crab. Oh, my goodness. And the SpongeBob Giff. Yep. Krusty crab. Yes. Like everything was double, triple.

Oh, I had to lay down my first one. I had to just lay down. No, like, if I, if I wasn't on my official visit, trying to fit in and feel cool, like, I definitely would have laid down. I already had got dropped off by Clint to you. So I felt some type of way about that. I'm like, dang, my host just took, took his little, took the little host money and dropped me off and told me, yo, you'll be fine. Hang with them.

So Clint had somewhere to be. So for the people listening, Clint, our roommate, who's now a Virginia coach, he had somewhere to be. Yep. So he left and just left you with me because he wanted to go hang out and he didn't want to be encumbered by you. And so he dropped me off. You must have been fun to be around. So now I'm like, I got dropped off. Everyone's packing a dip in.

So he's a recruit. And I'm like, well, if he's putting a dip in, I got to put a dip in. But little did I know, Aisa is from Virginia, from the south. He dips all the time. Yeah. Like, it's not something that is just like, okay. Yeah, somebody's like, Nate, how was your visit? You were like, man, they were white boying down there.

Oh, man. Threw up in the bathroom for like 15 minutes. I think I took a shit too. Good to know. But I think I rallied because you guys, like, you guys made me. And I like, I didn't tell anybody. So it was just like, yo, I can't not drink. Who are you going to tell?

like you're telling everybody you meet where you're from Connecticut how's the visit been well I've been just the last two hours I was vomiting I'm from New York stop fucking saying Connecticut when you say that you like that shit but my first cigarette now ever

13 years old my parents decided to take us to Bald Head Island which is a bad idea because on Bald Head Island there were golf carts so when you increase teen mobility teen things happen you know golf carts safe enough to let your kid go whip it around the island that has no cars on it

but not safe enough to ensure that I'm not going to come back with some darts and I just remember same thing as the dip just laying down on the ground for probably a solid hour and a half it was just things were spinning it was a crusty crab moment as well and I can't remember if that was before the dip or the the siggies but there needs to be a de-escalation plan for these jewelers man but it's scary because the jewelers it's going to be like the purge out here the jewelers the same kids that were eating tie pots. You know an Ocean City this weekend where... So it's like...

I literally, I still, that's still like, is living written free in my head. The fact that that was a trend to eat tidepots. What do you think the most fucked up thing we did was? I mean, I felt guilty for masturbating to stills.

Kids are out here eating detergent. Fucking smoking. They had to invent a new way to smoke cigarettes. I understand. it's hard to get caught we were downloading on what lime wire and bear share i feel like we did cool shit like revolutionized the music scene like i'm i'm literally trying to think they did jewels i i don't even know like what what kind of stuff like we were doing because we weren't even like the donut era and stuff like that in cars like doing crazy stuff in cars i don't think don't know there

like like like you had to live in like california yeah it's probably that's probably like a uh yeah regional thing but river river river I'm trying to think, I don't think there's anything that you can compare to eating tie pods. No. What did we do that was fucked up back in the day? I'm talking about trends. I'm talking about like national trends. Furbies.

Yo, that's how fucking wholesome we were, dude. Furbies were like, oh, it's a stuffed animal that moves, dude. I had a Furby. Yeah, it's not enough for these kids. They're fucking the stuffed animals probably. Oh, my goodness. They're different. These kids are different out here, man.

Yeah, they are. I'm not being that serious. If you're listening, you have a teenager. Your teenager's fine. Anyways, we were at Kyrie or the beach. Yeah. Well, let me talk about the beach this weekend, man. I am, beach stock is up, okay, for me.

Been to Ocean City a number of times, New Jersey. My in-laws have a place up there. Shout out to Joe and Rob. but it's a great spread. They have everything, man. Like when I'm there, I feel like, you know how people stereotypically talk about their in-laws? I would hope they're not listening,

so I'm not kissing their asses. But like, I love my in-laws, man. They're fun. They got a fucking curing that does like liquor drinks, dude. That's lit. Yeah, slur-ig is what I was calling it, bro. You ever seen one of these things?

You just, hey, here's something. In a pod, there's a Long Island iced tea. You just pop that. thing in there. That's amazing. Yeah. Now I opted for like uh jack and in ginger but it looked cool as shit. Um, they also a mule one. Huh? So you can make a quick Moscow. Yeah, dude, whatever you want, dude. That's fire. Whatever you want. What's it called? See, like that's where you have to use your influence. You have to slur egg. That's the name of it. No. That's what I'm saying. You don't use your marketing. You want me to shout it out. Yeah, they might send us one. We can make

drinks. Yeah. The season's coming up. You know, we're really, we're in here. That's. We're in here. That's We're in here on Monday nights going live. You're a volume shooter with this marketing stuff. Hey, man. Like, you know, I'm just trying to keep it. You're trying to keep it going. Well, anyways, this thing's awesome. You know, at night we watch curb your enthusiasm.

Okay. Like me and my laws, it's fun as shit, you know. And we, in fact, we watched the most recent season, and I was catching up on a little bit of that. Have you seen it yet, Matt? I have. Okay, so I had only watched the first couple, and I was picking it back up.

And, you know, we were watching the, the middling episode where like if you're at a dinner party so basically there's a dinner party and Larry David yeah not everybody is equipped to be the middle of the social scene yeah Larry's sitting on the fringes of the table and one of his buddies is in the middle of the table and the dinner party is just crashing and burning because the guy can't facilitate a great conversation he can't spread the ball around he can't facilitate a great conversation so Larry calls time out in the middle of dinner and is like we need a new middle and I never thought about this this is very very smart. Is it not?

Like, dinner parties can be very uncomfortable with the wrong people are in the wrong place. I guess so, yeah. Yeah, but only Larry is a big enough asshole to tell somebody to move. I mean, you call it time out and just like shot it straight. Yeah. I mean, like, and so I thought it was a great concept. Anyways, the next day, uh, we're

having dinner and we're like, who's going to middle? You know, the whole thing. And I'm not going to say who had the middle, but my father-in-law called time out. And put me in the middle. so lo and behold all i could think of right on the spot was what's everybody's favorite water because i was tweeting about that hours earlier i guess twitter if you're really good at it is kind of

like being the middle at a dinner table right like if you're really getting the impressions and that sort of thing but i come to find out my wife likes aquafina oh yeah two for three dollars yeah usually so uh a leader i actually made a divorce joke like right there at the table as i should right that stuff tastes terrible but no but maybe you guys are meant for each other because your list was disrespectful like as most people can't afford that water no no because fiji is way is the best water it's the best water and it's not cheap either so like oh i don't know i didn't know because i was i was expecting for sure somebody to say this is really like if somebody people people

People are fucking weird. Somebody could rank their top five favorite McLaren's online, but if I rank my top five favorite waters and I want to fork over a little bit more for Aquipana, I'm some fucking elitist. Yeah, I drink expensive water. Yeah, you don't have to say that two-door Hyundai is like one of your top five cars. Like, what the fuck? I'll drink whatever the fuck water I want. Matter of fact, I'm made up of 70% water. So like very literally, it's a great investment. You can't say you don't like the new Drake album and Aquacopana be your number one water. What do you mean? That's what you're drinking on the resort with looking at palm trees is Aquapina listening to the Drake album. So, you know, I did this podcast with Dave Damashek a long time ago. And we talked about a concept I think I thought up called system bands. We actually were just talking about this.

System bands are bands that are only good in a time and a place. Like you're a system artist. It's only good when it's the right time. And Drake, this new album is a system album to a T. I've got to be at a luxury resort, like enjoying that album. Drinking Aquapina. Aquapina. Whatever is cool.

I'm not drinking any aquapina, bro. What's it called? Got me fucked up. What's it called? Aquapana. Aquapana. Aquapina is a little. Oh, yeah.

Aquapana. Aquapana. Aquapina. No, that reminds me of that. There's a Freudian slip. You were thinking about a peanut colatas. If I'm drinking, yeah, if I'm, if I'm, if I'm, if I got to be drinking aquapana in the Caribbean to enjoy Drake's album.

By the way, I'm 37 and I'm white. What am I dancing for, dude? What am I dancing for? Because you're alive. Why not? Who says you can't dance? That's not how I celebrate. But yeah, dude, Fiji, man. I'm sorry, I underrated.

It's the top six water. What do you want me to do? There's so many waters out there. I guess. I left so many waters off to put Fiji on. Fiji should be appreciative that the king mentioned them in his top six. You left off aquahydrate. Anyways, that was one time I felt like I was on the spot,

being in the middle at the dinner table, but I did a pretty good job. And then the other time was, all right, gun to your head proverbially. Read, you've got in-laws, let's just say. I'm not going to give you a profile of what they're into, but let's say they're white people. Sounds good.

You're on the back porch. Everybody's catching a buzz. It's awesome. Everybody's having a good time. They're like, hey, you did so good be in the middle. Why don't you DJ, you know? Yeah. And you're like, fuck.

At this point, I've been just assaulting my pen. Speaking of vaping. And I'm like, you know, when you're the DJ, you got to be a song ahead, man. Right. That's the thing about these DJs. They're not just pressing next song, dude. Right.

You got to read the room. You know, you need to be more agile than anything. You don't have a playlist ready for this moment? I don't have a back porch with my in-laws in Ocean City fucking half stone out of my mind. You just throw Conrad Joe on. You're dead. Bang. You're dead.

Okay. Nate's dead. There's two people left in here now. Okay. Sorry, Nate's dead. Hold on. All right. I got a gun to your head.

What are you playing? So here's what happens. You're on a real role and the music stops and you're so enthralled with whatever conversation you're into because it's electric. You love your in-laws. You love the people on the porch. You love your lovely wife. You don't hear the deafening silence for 40 seconds.

Right. And somebody says, Chris, we need a song. Pop Quiz Hot Shot. What do you do, read? Dear Mr. Fantasy traffic. Oh. I would throw that. See, this is what I do.

I have a playlist. It's called Dat Nunu on Spotify. Go follow it. It's hype. It is not separated into rap and to rock. You're going to play God, Joe. I was setting the scene. It's white people on the beach.

No, it's not. No, we're not drunk. I'm the only one that's high, dude. Me, me. I'm just, I'm just, it's Sunday evening. I'm just, it's my Sunday evening. I'm just, people have a cocktail, but anyway. Anyways, like, it's tough. So dear Mr. Fantasy would be.

Yeah, dear Mr. Fantasy traffic. Damn, that's great. And I mean, that buys your time to queue up a couple more. And everyone's just like, ooh, you know, the first like 30, 45 seconds are nice, like, great song. And then that could launch into some music conversation. And everyone could just sit and enjoy. What'd you say? Aaron and then I feel calling. No, dude. Hey, this is good. Keep going. This is good. This is good. Nate is at his, uh, he's at his, uh, he's at his in-laws house.

No, no, no, no, not at my. No, if you were a white guy and you had like, you know, you're like, like, those are the bangers for you guys. Okay, keep going. So we got Phil Collins and Cotton Eye Joe so far. Bang, bang, you're dead twice. Divorced. Sweetie, can we talk inside? That sort of thing, dude.

Cotton Eye Joe. Oh, man. I'm trying to think what else. It's quiet out here, Nate. We need a song. Dang. Yeah, I probably wouldn't be good at this. No, I mean, it's just, it's challenging.

I went, I went, I went, I think I went more than a feeling. I think I went more than a feeling. I think I went, let me make sure of that, because I, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think I went more than a feeling. Is that Boston? Yeah, it was, it was more than a feeling. Matt, what are you doing? You've had time to think. No, I would just throw on a grateful jam that's extended so that I can have some time to think of the next tune.

And that's what I usually do. I always start with the almond brothers. If I'm outside and I want to get the shit popping and I'm with my friends, not an in-law event, but a day drinking or day whatever you're doing event. Say you're on the water. This guy would be perfect. No, Matt. I raise you mountain jam 24 minutes long.

Or Jessica, because there's no words. It's just an instrumental. And that's great because words can make, yeah, words can make you feel funny. Exactly. people are listening to the words that you just put on Spotify. But I'm playing chess here because I'm going 24 minutes of Malin Jam live. I think it's the Fillmore. Yep.

Amazing. Hold up. Gun to your head. You're at a black barbecue and you're on the ox. What are you playing to start off? It was all the dream. Juicy. You're starting with juicy.

Okay. You may be, you're still alive. Okay. My life, my life, my life in the sunshine. I don't have a plan here. Stream of consciousness. I'm hitting it out of the park so far. No, I don't know.

I don't know about this second. Okay, redeem yourself. What's the third song? How old are the people? I gave you a specific demo. I said 60 in white. You're just saying black people. I don't think black people are monolithic in their music taste.

I don't think they're giving us the ox court either. No, they're not. Matt is definitely probably right with that. Definitely probably right. But if you got the chance, I guess those first two, but you're out of there after that. If you're going to be harsh on me. Computer love.

If it's a good time event where we're drinking outside, I don't think I'm getting run off the stage yet. Okay. Yeah, dude. Okay. Would Bob Marley play? Depends on the crowd. You got to read the crowd.

Marvin Gay? Yeah. For sure, dude. Yeah. I don't want to answer that question, but I figure it would. Mm-hmm. Man, I don't know. I don't want to get into some trouble here,

but I feel like I'm three songs deep without getting run out of the facility. I think this is making me what you call. This is like, this is like maybe like content gold. Is it bringing a white guy to like a black cookout? No. And putting them like secretly on the ox and see how long it takes. Oh, that's for.

See how long it takes for people to be like what like who's who's on the music That's really good. Because you never want that like if you if the music's going all night Yeah, no one turns to be like who's the DJ yeah that means you're doing a good job But as soon as two or three songs cut it's just kind of like it's a lot of pressure DJing It's a lot of pressure DJing whatever you're DJing man. Yeah, that's that's tough. What what Okay, you're you're at a what you just described no I was just combating what you said serious how far off are we oh you're probably you're probably doing well what are you going with um i think juicy is is i think that was a good start yeah dude i'm i'm playing juicy and i'm

and i'm calling in an emergency i'm gonna have my wife call me and say that something's wrong and then i have to leave leave on juicy you definitely get invited back you know yeah but stop while you're quit while you're ahead yeah but see the reason why why I said Cot Night Joe at the black cookouts Not that juicy is a deep cut dude I'm just saying I'm just a safe cut You can get the party started like with the electric slide like there's a lot

There's a lot of different dance Dance songs that can really Ways we could go here get things going Yeah I got a lot of vinyl and shit The beach is cool I rode in a Surrey Have you ever seen a Surrey They probably have it didn't you grow up in a boardwalk town Surrey's they're like the bicycles that five people

Can ride at once They're all pedaling together. Oh. Yeah, did that. Did some Rita's water ice. Went to a water park. Wait, wait, wait. How many people were on the bike?

Is it a survey if it's more than just one? If it's like two? Multiple. It's multiples. Yeah, it's multiples. And then I ate like a lobster roll and had an icy for lunch. I think that's what everybody does at the beach. They do shit like that on the boardwalk all day.

So I had 10 out of 10 boardwalk experience, beach experience. Ocean City is a great place. So one piece of sports news that we almost talked about for the entire podcast, we'll give it a go. Kyrie Irving, he's opted in. We were going to do 30 minutes on hypothetical, you know, we were going to do the most brilliant list, man. It really was. This would have been a segment to end all segments. It would have been the best destinations for content when it came to Kyrie Irving.

Because Kyrie had this little short list. I mean, certainly there could have been a dark horse, but the bottom line was he had to decide whether he was going to opt in on his deal by what, the 27th? Yeah, I think so for 37 million books. And it's not like he had any leverage, so it kind of felt like to me this was maybe going to happen, unless he really wanted out and go make like, what did you say, 6 million a year. Yeah, there was crazy speculation that he would sign the mid-level deal with the Lakers for 6 million,

but he's not leaving 30 mil on the table. Yeah, I mean, you can burn all the sage you want, man. That 30 mil is 30 mil. Normal people in the world keep going. But those who dare to be different lead us into tomorrow, Irving told the athletic. Tony Sargousa just said that. Go not where there is a path.

Go where there is no path and blaze a trail and leave a trail. Leave a trail. Yeah. Tony Sargusa. That's right. Irving had, uh, he had, uh, he had, until 5 p.m. on Wednesday. Yeah.

So he decides to choose the road less traveled, which is interesting because somebody who opted out of that deal, like 10 years ago, that would have been the quote you could have used then. But now it's like totally different, right? You use that, take the yellow wood quote or some iteration of it when you actually stay with your team for more money. Like people want to leave so bad,

They'll leave for less money. It's funny, dude. I was thinking about this, and I'm a Knicks fan, and they're talking to Jalen Brunson, and I know Kyrie is one of the best players on the planet if he's healthy and if he's locked in or if it's the most important thing to him, and I respect whatever the most important thing to Kyrie.

So I'm not mad about Kyrie not loving basketball. Sometimes it seems more than he loves other things. I don't know that I would have been excited about Kyrie on the Knicks, because it just feels like purgatory. It just feels like a tease. You're just like, God damn. the 36 games he's going to be on the floor and not doing something else. I'm going to be so excited.

But I can't. I love Brunton. Obviously, everyone will want Kyrie, but it's just, it's up in the air with him. And for a fan of the Knicks, give me that short thing. You want, we want something that's going to be, hey, we know we're going to get a good game from him every night. NBA heads are just ripping us right now. So what? It doesn't matter.

They're like, no, you don't. You don't. But here's the deal. Like, Jalen Brunson's a good player. And I don't mean any disrespect by that, but it is amazing how far Kyrie's falling to where we're like, yeah, the Knicks are on the list, but they're just in the middle of negotiation with Jalen Brunson. Tyree's better than Jalen Brunson objectively. Yeah, for sure. But he's just a huge gamble right now because you don't know how many games he's going to play.

What I didn't want was like a bunch of, you know, like the people that came over to the Nets to be Nets fans to come be Knicks fans. like no you don't get to fucking cut the line and like be grandfathered in for in 2046 when they actually make a run in a title like i want to be the only nix fan i don't need new kiree nix fans like don't muddy the waters so we can earn a four seed losing the first round and i i do think brooklyn is actually the most interesting destination from a content perspective you got ben simmons there you got kevin durant there steven ash still there like missed expectations past few years. I mean, they got good players. Okay, okay, okay. I hear

you, but hear me out on this. Westbrook, little flippy flop there. Westbrook in some sort of a, you know, a sign and trade deal. Westbrook up to New Jersey, you get Westbrook and Ben Simmons. I'm not taking Westbrook for anything. The whole year is just Westbrook yelling at Ben Simmons. I'm not taking Westbrook.

Like right in his ear, dude. I'm not taking him. Like right in his, like on a soapbox to get up there to be able to yell in his ear. Just screaming in his fucking ear, calling him soft. That would have been Westbrook in, and Westbrook not hitting his shots. I mean, I don't know.

That would have been pretty good. That would have been pretty good. I have a question for you. Have you seen an athlete get so ticked off by something like the Westbrook and the West blank situation? Yes, all the time, dude. Like something that small? Have you ever seen Chris Everett and Jim Rome?

The other, yes, that's, I've seen that. What was he calling him? Christine or something? No, he called him Chris Everett. It's Jim Everett. Yeah, Jim Everett. That's what I mean. Yeah, Jim Everett.

He said, call me Chris one more time. I bet you don't do it. I bet I do. Chris is a tennis player. Chris Everett, female tennis player. Yeah, dude. And Jim was not having that, dude. Jim turned into Jimbo real quick, dude, in a sport coat.

But like, he's the slowest neutralization of Jim Rome. But as an ex-athlet how do you feel about like Westbrook kind of like showing that card like hey like if you really don't like me and you want to piss me off you can say I miss shots

you can pull this card and best believe you're going to get a certain reaction and for some guys they love that they love that and I think about like someone like when Kevin Garnett was playing you don't think Kevin Garnett would say

that like at the tip off of a game if he was playing against him dude at this day and age listen the guy in in in in hustle anthony edwards character in hustle how great is that he would have been like strong like bull west brick with that fucking smirk it's so funny we'll talk about that movie in a little bit i'm sure but all it tells me is that that's been being that's been used for like a while right like people used to call him that back in the day it's just it shows me that he's at probably is breaking point with this shit. Like, we have hit rock bottom. You know, whatever rock bottom is for him, he's just not dealing with this shit anymore.

What does that do for you as a GM thinking about bringing someone like that onto your team right now? Like, does that concern you? Because that's so small. That's so small that like I can see like literally, if you're going to the Celtics, I can see everyone in the stands holding or Port-Nehoy or someone making Westbrook brick shirts and everyone wearing it. Yeah. Like what does that do for you or what is that like how does that make you like like does that worry you like hey our guy's not going to be able to perform tonight or focus? I don't think it's that. I think it's more why he's giving that the time of day. I mean that there's a reason that that that's become annoying to him. He's almost out of the league.

Like his career is falling off a cliff like no team wants him. No team will trade for him. He's close to being literally out of the NBA. It was bizarre watching Darwin Ham our friend. He's going to. to really help that Lakers offense evolve. It was weird watching him give Westbrook all that love, and Westbrook was, like, standing in the room listening. Did you see that in the opening press conference? They, like, introduced the new coach, and he's there at the press conference

and, like, doing the thing you would want from your, like, quote-unquote star player making max money, but the elephant in the room is nobody really wants them there. Well, and it's just gotten so bizarre that I'm watching, and I'm like, this is just to drive the trade value up, right? And that sucks, dude, because Westbrook has been one of the most exciting players, like, of our generation, triple double machine, even if the efficiency is not great. Like, he just plays with reckless abandon, a ton of emotion.

But that stuff doesn't, it's, you know, it's like the conversation we have with Baker. Like, his public approval rating went way down when he started playing poorly. I'm not comparing him and Russell Westbrook, but none of that stuff I just alluded to matters now. People are just going to make the Westbrook joke. and that's how tough sports fans are and that's how tough the media is and if you don't like hearing it the only way to get people to stop is to make shots

and you can fucking scare people like I'm sure there's some people like I'm not going to make a joke now I'm not going to make that joke because I don't want to get into an altercation with Russell Westbrook you know like I'm not afraid of anybody but I'm just like why would I want to like tweet that joke

and now be in a Twitter argument with just stupid so I think what Russ is doing to just trying to get people to like chill out a little bit with that but it also lets you know that he's fucking being bothered by that too so i don't know man like matt said he's the NBA it sounds like his career is not in as good a shape as it obviously was yeah i think he's gonna have to play this season out with the lakers i don't really see what else they can do if you're here in arizona colorado indiana louisiana michigan new jersey new york

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Gambling problem in Arizona call 1,800 Next Step. In Colorado, Indiana, New Jersey, and Virginia call 1-800 gambler. and in Michigan, 1,800-2707-1-17. Tennessee, y'all two. 1-800-9-9-7-89. I forgot to talk about the Adrian Peterson and Levyon Bell Fight. That's going to happen at the Crypto Center. Yeah, who do you think will be the favorite?

I think anybody that did the switch thing is probably the favorite. I feel like Adrian Peterson is like a 60s military dad. Didn't you say he has like really heavy hands when he shook your hand or something? Okay, Adrian Peterson has the heaviest, like firmest handshake I've ever felt. So, oh, you don't like, yeah. You don't have to tell me because I, I experienced it. And unfortunately, the national championship, right? I, yes.

Yeah. I did not get the grip that I wanted because I went in for the homie debt. and he went in for the military dad. What are you playing on his fucking back porch? And listen. What if he's your in-laws? Yo, you're fucked. Bro.

Bro, he caught my hand and he didn't let me re-grip. So he just squeezed like my four fingers together. Kind of like, hey, like shake my hand like a man. And didn't let me go. And then that was just the meeting. This is at the National Championship Sooners versus Florida Gators. Bro, it's just incredible. Like, I'm trying to imagine that the struggle on your face.

We're in the lobby of whatever. That whole process, bro, when you go for DAP, somebody goes for handshake, vice versa, it's bad. But when it's Adrian Peterson, and then he squeezed the life out of your hand. It ruined my day at the time because I remember tapping you would be like, we were drunk. I'd be like, bro, did you just see him squeeze my hand like that? And you were like, you were like, yeah, he does it to everyone.

And I was just like, yo, I don't like that. Well, if you don't like it, go fight him at the crypto center. That's what had this. That's what this fight is over. You know how we found out that Jock Peterson got slapped over fantasy football? This weekend I joke that the, if that brawl and the Angels Mariners game was over fantasy football, we needed an E-60. but you know Adrian Peterson shook Levyon Bell's hand

too fucking hard that's all this is about Leveon's fighting for free Get back Hey it's going down it's going down at the crypto center Which makes a lot of sense I think I do have Adrian Peterson though I think that I think Adrian Peterson It's volatile not saying there's not upside but it's volatile

I think just the way like also to how angrily He runs yeah If it goes to any testament of him having him I think Leveon Bell is going to have. I also think Leveon Bell might be a Floyd Mayweather type where he's super patient because if we've seen the way he runs, he's real patient.

Sometimes you're watching Leveon Bell run and you're like, damn, this is boring as fuck for like six seconds. And then next thing you know, he's out the game for 26. So you think he's going to be kind of like a ropa dope and then throwing a few like nice hard shots ring Adrian Peterson's bell a little bit? Yeah.

I think it'd be kind of hard to ring Adrian Peterson. And that's what I'm and that's like the Liberty Bell, dude. That has been around, dude. So that's what I think too. I honestly feel like Adrian, Adrian Peterson can probably take a strong hit on his chin. Just thinking about football wise, like when you're a running back,

you probably get hit right under your chin a lot. Yeah, Adrian Peterson is going to Kimbo slice you. If that's all you got, then it's over. It's over. You remember that in the backyard? Yes. When Kimbo got hit and that big strong dude fucking muscle bound his shit, even bigger than Kimbo. Backyard, just thumping, dude.

Thumping. He said, hit me, bro. He hit him in the face. Dumb and dumber. We'll talk about it in a second. Remember the doggy bag scene? It was a lot like that, minus the falling down. That's all you got.

It's over. Yes, it is because at that point I'm exiting the backyard. And whatever the purse was for fighting Kimbo slice or Adrian Peterson is, it's not worth it. you hit a guy like that he doesn't move his face and that's how i think it's going to go with uh adrian peterson he gets hit in the face we're going to find out how strong his chin is i think it's pretty strong shout out to our old teammate of Courtney williams who's in the boxer yeah he's a boxer just want to give him some love he's he's coming up in the rankings hopefully he has a long career shout out to arturo goddie yeah shout up but mainly anyone who's going from football

bashing your head with football to stepping in the ring. Financial advisors love that. Like, I just wish the best for you. They just do, dude. With health. They do, man. You're like, what are you thinking about doing the next chapter? Here I have some emerging markets and this, no.

I'm thinking about boxing. You want to put it in? Yep. Nope. I'm going to, you want to flip houses? No. So this retired athletes boxing thing is not going away anytime soon, do you think? Think about it.

Is there somebody you wouldn't pay, like casually? Like, I'll put 50 cents on two construction workers fighting, dude. That's human nature. That's what's wrong with society, and that's why this is such a viable market. You're talking about people who have fought their whole lives, and the most money they've made in, like, years, are fighting a YouTuber who's now a boxer, okay?

Mike Tyson says, but Mike Tyson, Iron Mike, was on TV recently talking about fighting. Jake Paul. Like that's how strong our urge to watch people fight is. It's a big bag. Is there anybody you wouldn't pay to see fight? I would pay to see anybody fight, dude. I'm admitting that sickness, dude. Because fighting's one of those things. Kids know, old people know. Because fighting is honestly one of those things where as much as you want to like feel like you know who's going to win, there's always that chance that who you like, who you like, It's the highest drama.

It's the highest drama there is. It's the highest drama. And it's just like, yeah, what if, what if the Paul kid knocks Mike Tyson out or knocks him down? Like, it's stage, or. And even if it's stage. I'm going to be like a moon landing guy. I'm going to be like a moon landing guy.

But even if it is. I'm in the studio. Do you know anybody that was at the Jake Paul Mike Tyson fight? I'm going to be doing all that stuff. Because think about it. If he did beat Tyson, think about the part. to how much money that would generate for

everyone going around. If he'd be in how crazy it would be. Another one of these fucking things, dude. They're too dangerous. Tyson's almost 60 years old. At what cost, man. Yeah, he's 60 years old. If he beat Tyson, which he's not going to,

I am not paying for a rematch because I don't need to subject myself to that. Now, having said that, though, this is a very robust little market they built here on people just fighting each other. Who would you want to see fight? I'd love to see you fight somebody. I don't want to fight anybody, dude.

I really don't, dude. You know where I would love to fight somebody in the privacy of my home? I've said this often. Like, the only risk of losing a fight is getting your ass kicked in front of people. That's the only risk of losing a fight, like, at all.

I mean, it's a pride thing. It's, all it is a pride thing. And at this age, you make a fucking, And if somebody came to me and was like, hey, I want a million dollars to fight you, Chris, I'd be like, I'm good. I have two kids. You're too rich, though. And their opinion.

I know, I'm just telling you that my kids' opinions of me are too important. Like, there's no amount of money that I can put on my kids' opinion of me. Daddy, you got beat up by somebody that maybe shouldn't have beat you up who, like, you know, when you're a dad, that's pretty much everybody. You're supposed to until maybe like seven years old, your kid's supposed to believe that like nobody can beat you up. Me, I was pretty lucky. Because I was like, yeah, I think my dad might actually be able to whoop everybody.

Everybody. Everybody. I'd love to see Prime Howie Long. Prime Howie Long would make mince meet a Jake Paul. Yeah. Because think about Prime Howie Long, Prime Howie Long was actually a boxer. So they were starting on an even playing field,

and he was also like one of the biggest freaks in nature. Your dad also in the, in the game. The heaviest hands, probably some of the heaviest hands in America. He's like a benevolent AP. Yeah. He's not trying to kill you with the handshake. Your dad has the big Mario Gloves without having to Mario Gloves.

Yeah, exactly, exactly. But it's a long list of people I would pay to see fight each other. Speaking of famous. I'm not going to be holier than now. That's all I'm saying. Fuck, you want to watch this fight? Go for it. Speaking of famous actors, like Howie Long,

have you guys seen any good movies or TV shows lately? Speaking of new movies, you guys owe me $3.99 for renting movies. It's perfect, perfect title. It's just a dumb movie. Dumb and Dumber is not like a classic movie, like of any sort of the tale. Want to know what really chaps my ass? Go ahead. Do you have the floor?

You guys suggesting and hyping up a movie as terrible as, dumb and dunger. How could we? Like, no one's ever liked it before. I'm a huge Jim Carrey fan easily. What's your favorite Jim Carrey movie? The mask.

The mask. Somebody stop me. I love the mask. And liar, liar is a good movie also. Yes, it is. This pen is royal blue. See, those are good movies.

I just remember the rambor There's two things I remember in that movie. The liar liar movie, one, that absolute babe in the movie. Yeah. It's not Jennifer Tilly. It's the one in the elevator. It's the one in the elevator. And I also remember him like every time I have to pee.

Swear to God I thought about it today. I had to pee in the car multiple times. But how many times is it okay to tell a driver who you're paying, you know, like to pull over because I got a small bladder. I thought about the fucking the scene in liar liar where he's like, your honor. It's been, you know, research shows that if you hold your pee, you know, it can even stop you from having an erection. I think about that all the time. Dude, that was incredibly impactful for me as a kid.

I thought about it in class all the time. And I was like, Jim Carrey is a liar because I can't get this thing to go down. And I hold my pee all the time. Fucking sitting in class in the morning, like middle school. Fucking, yeah, just sitting there. We got khakis on because we go to the. this fucking so you gotta tuck it underneath your belt oh the tuck you do you know what we're talking about oh 1,000% I used like out of control though yeah but it's out of control I'm like

I'm looking at the pythagorean theorem yeah what is with that get up and do a presentation no expel me oh my good like kick me out of school no I can't you fuck my brain up dude yeah because you started talking about liar liar which is a way better movie Jim Carrie movie, then dumb and dumber. I'm saying your take fuck my brain up. Yeah. Like, I feel like I got TBI from this take, dude. It's all good.

What I'm here for. So what did you know? All right. I understand it is inherently a white guy movie. Oh, man. And that's what you said. And that was your hypothesis. And I feel like you might have a little confirmation bias here.

But were there no funny parts? No, there was a few. Let me see. The salt shaker, seabass. Yeah. Huh? Yeah, see? The sea bass. He wrote down the parts he liked.

Listen, the sea bass coming back around and him being in the bathroom at 315 for man love. Yes, yes. You didn't laugh at the shitter scene, dude? The shitter scene is, it's all right. Like, I can see that kind of like. Oh, try to explain that to Waylon, who loves you, absolutely adores you. That's his favorite movie scene. Is it really?

Yes, dude. And that is understandable for someone his age. It's children's comedy. I got you. I got you. And our pets' heads are falling off. Oh my God. Like it's just like you have to be in the mood for that type of comedy.

I definitely can see that it's a somewhat funny movie. What about in the fucking, that was like you with the water. You get the analogy now when we were tubing. You had sunscreen the whole time. You waited until three hours into the float to be like, hey, a pink man, you need You need some SPF? That was like... When they're walking down the road and the bus full of the girls

go on the tour pull-up. Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, yeah. We didn't like that scene. Those two lucky stuff. Those must be two lucky guys. No. You know who does the entire movie? You know who knows every movie line that was ever made, Lane Johnson?

If Lane Johnson has one amazing talent, and it's unfair because he has two. football he also can commit any movie line to memory everybody's got a friend like that and they just fire him at you and you're like one time we made it a bulldog and a shih Tzu we called it a bullshit yeah bullshit how about the how about the owl yeah got hit in the face yeah huh see huh good stuff samsonite there's two of them samsonite one of them has has a gun did you pay the gas bill That's what he asked. Hey, pills are good.

Pills are good. He was dying, bro. They gave him the rat poison. Oh, my goodness. Spoilers. Right? There's definitely, definitely some good parts. But what have you been watching, Chris?

So I've been watching Ozark. So you might want to plug your fucking ear holes because I'm going to tell you what happened. And anybody who's in the car that's riding around, and what happens at the end of season four of Ozark. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. When we had Chad Johnson on, we asked,

we asked him if he thought that one of the birds passed away, dies in season four. Yeah. So any day now for Wendy, like I hope a suitcase falls out of the sky and just crushes her. I don't care that she went to that hospital for a night. doesn't change anything for me. It's all part of a ploy for her.

Everything's about her. She's just, she's the worst. She's the worst of the worst. The problem with Wendy Bird is Wendy Bird, in actuality, cannot separate her personal trials and tribulations from her business job, the one that she chose, which is working for the cartel. The irony is, Bateman is the one that everybody's like, hey, fucking nut up, do this, you need to do that. But he's actually business

like Wendy Bird, you know, it's about her grudge with her dad. You know, that almost blew the whole game. It was about her grudge with Ruth. That almost blew the whole game. She's out here acting like she's the cold calculating one. She's got nothing on Walter White, dude.

Or fucking Walter White's wife, for that matter. I don't even remember what what she in her. I don't know, man. I hate Wendy Bird. Now, Laura Lenny is doing a great job. She did a great job. Let me tell you this about Ozark. Can I set the stage here? Reed, I did not know that's the end of the show. I, after the fact, found out that that was the end of the show. Last season. Yeah, missed that. So when it ended, are we positive? Hey, at least let's take away. No, no, it's not

Game of Thrones bad, but they did not stick the landing. They were on such a heater. But let me tell you, oh, so this came out, this came out, pure, it wasn't like all, all episodes out of once, right? So you couldn't start at eight, you know? Yeah, no, no, no. I, I binged it. Honestly, the middle. I binged it. I binged. But we didn't. So let's, that's a positive. We didn't start at episode eight. We started at episode one. Well, yeah, which is good because I did that with succession. I did that with long strange trip as well. Uh, I think I was episode five out of the gate. And Jerry Garcia was getting back together with, uh, his first wife. And I was like,

this is, oh, they're doing a backwards thing. Here's a, he was his first girlfriend. Here's a better question. All the dudes were dying. I'm like, damn, you're just going to kill off Grateful Dead in the first scene, dude. No, I did episode five. So here's a better question. What series have you watched and enjoyed at the end of it? You thought like it stuck the landing?

Because I feel us as a consumer's, like we need to be perfect. We never like we always, we always have something. And even the series that we love were always like a lot of people, like the majority is like, well, the ending could have been better. And it's like, so think what series have you watched? And you're like, you know what? Start to finish. Like they stuck the landing. It was great.

Justified. The wire. I really like the wire. So justified Reed. What is that? I think you'd like just a lot. Oh, you tried it? I didn't hate it.

I just couldn't fall in love with it. What is it about? So how many, did you do the first season? Maybe two. Okay. It's been a long time. Two are, because they each have their own individual kind of villains. Three through, I think, six or seven.

It's all Wind Duffy and the Dixie Mafia and all these other kind of guys. They come to the forefront. So I got to give it a chance. I think you should give her a chance. I don't know if anyone else has seen it. But Boyd Crowder, Boyd Crowder is probably my favorite character. He's Raylan's nemesis. He is the best written character.

whoever wrote the lines for that character is absolutely phenomenal. I would like the people that wrote Deadwood to fuck themselves because it is really hard to follow. Speaking of like Cowboy TV shows. And I will try to justify it again, I guess. I don't know, man, Game of Thrones had trouble, big trouble sticking the landing. Huge. Huge.

Big trouble, dude. Sopranos is if he. Sopranos, I'm going to be objective for a second. I'm just kind of railing against the Sopranos for the fuck of it. when I say hate the ending, it's a cop out. Actually, in actuality, when you look at the way other shows end oftentimes, like, it wasn't that bad. It was definitely good, in my opinion.

So Kingston wins, dude. But, you know, Breaking Bad, I didn't even think, like, there were times at the end of Breaking Bad where I was like, this is a bridge too far, man. Like, I don't need to see Walter living in a cabin. You know, the finale scene was just too much for me. I thought Breaking Bad lost believability in that last season it got too ridiculous. Fuck, it was hard to believe for the whole thing to me.

But yeah, but yeah, it did. I mean, like, yeah, it's hard to stick the landing. But here's my biggest problem with Ozark. Earmuffs, Matt, seriously, bro, cover your fucking ears, man. I'm whispering this because Matt's in the room. Matt, can you hear me right now? Can you hear me right now? All right, he can't hear me.

He's not responding. They killed the best character. in the show. They killed the best character in the show. Well, can I ask you a question? I've seen the first three seasons. Yeah. And so if they don't really stick the length,

should I invest and watch that fourth season? Yes, it's a great season, but you might be disappointed. That's all I'll say. Let's not spoil it. Let's save, save it. Perfect, I'll watch it. We'll also, we all watched the Sandler movie.

Yeah, hustle on Netflix. Hustle. Hustle. Love it. I'm just gonna say this, bro. Not gay, right? Happy Pride Month and all. Not gay.

But my man, Wancho, he took up all the air in the room. I could feel the women weren't breathing. You know? Fuck, dude. Yeah. The head guy. Yeah, dude. This guy's a stud, bro.

He's the type of guy. He's in the movie. You're like, this is awkward, especially because, you know, most fucking these Hollywood actors are like short kings, so I can at least be like, yeah, the guy's shorter than me. Whatever. You had to tuck it into your pants again? No. But this guy, like, I'm like, look, is one of those things where you're like, you're like,

this guy's, this guy's too handsome to be a basketball player. Then they, this is an actor. And then the actor. Man, he's really tall. He's good at basketball. I'm like, oh, this is watch. I'm like, God damn it. My wife's probably checking this motherfucker out.

Oh, and then he talks. He just talks. It's like, it's kind of unfair being Spanish, I feel like, dude. You're just fucking. And then you're tall and you're Spanish. And then you can play ball really well. So I'm just saying. That was, and he did a good job.

I'll just say that. Like, Wancho, I didn't know, I didn't know who he was. I'm not in the NBA head. I didn't know until after that they were real teammates in real life. Him in what you call, right? Yeah, him and Anthony Edwards played in Minnesota. I didn't know that. Yeah.

Yeah. How crazy is that? Yeah. Like, they're like, and I found that out after, and I was like, that's amazing. That's, like, hilarious. It makes it better. And it just makes you think, I wonder if they really had any of those type of interaction. Yeah.

Because Anthony Edwards definitely seems like that type of player and dude that he was kind of method-acting. He's method-acting, I feel like. Now, I also hear that he's just more like funny. He's not going to be as crude as saying everything that... That's what they were saying. When they were practicing with the Timberwolves, they would, like, chirp back and forth to each other. Not anything like that, but make fun of each other. And then in between takes, when they were filming movies, they were playing like, horse.

horse and everything like in between shots and stuff they were just dribbling on the sidelines and hanging out together i thought that i thought the movie was solid man like i thought it was solid i'm not going to say like every corner of the thing was like elite it was kind of you know a family movie but it was like it's kind of simple like kind of silly yeah you didn't have to think too hard but made the movie like pretty good for me was the basketball scenes were good and the cameos from all these different basketball players were a lot of fun right that's what i love the overseas these basketball scene, the outside, pick up, and just given, like, just given a different view of kind of like what's going on in the basketball world.

And just like for a scout, like, if you're really deep into it, what some of these scouts have to do to find some of these players, like, from all over the world. I guess that's true. For sure. Adam Sandler said it is. I mean, I'm like, I'm with you. I was, I'm like kind of. When you see how diverse the NBA is, you have to think at.

some point, like even going back to watching blue chips when they find Shaq. It's just like, you think about that and you're like, oh, like, does this really happen? And absolutely it happens. Like there's someone playing basketball on a milk crate or whatever like that somewhere that realistically, if you get them in the right coach and the right training, they probably can fend for themselves or make themselves a lot of money playing in the NBA or making the D-League or whatever it is. You got Shaq playing like pick up like a hundred miles into the Everglades on like a on like a on like a swamp boat or something, bro. He was out of high school, wasn't he in Blue Chips?

Yeah, yeah, he was in college when he appeared in it. Which is a great movie too, Blue Chips. Awesome. Awesome basketball movie. But that was cool just to imagine that there are undiscovered great hoopers. And there probably are, dude. There's probably a ton of like, I mean, you talk about NBA, Africa and all that stuff. Like there's going to be some amazing players.

Jada Kis said it in a song, there's a guy up north in jail that's probably better than Jordan. Right. Well, we knew that to be true in America, but with the game, how global it's gotten, bro. Like, I'm just imagining pickup games in Spain now. Anywhere. Like, which I didn't imagine them would be that cool. What country? The first guy came out there and you're like, this is the guy.

Is there a stat for like the overall, like biggest country? Like, but like people like height wise. The tallest countries? I want to say it's one of the Northern European countries. Yeah. So, yeah, like, I wonder, like, they're, like, what kind of, like, deep in the, like, people who, like, don't want to be bothered, but they're probably just like... At basketball?

Yeah, I got bad news, I think. Having, like, the crazy, crazy pickup games. I got bad news, I don't think the finish. The Swedish Jordan, he's not that good. I don't know. You're more like that, that Haas guy, the, the Haas guy that they passed up on and they were glad they passed up on. The Sixers, the fictional Sixters.

By the way, Ben Foster was like a monopoly. villain. He's so good. He's a great actor. He is. But in this role, they overdid the monopoly villain, is all I'm saying. He was very, he was very proper. I don't know shit on Ben Foster. I was going to cast this. This is the son. This is the owner's son who takes over. I'm so afraid to say anything about like a character that was written for Ben Foster. Like I'm not even saying he was poorly acted. Ben Foster was so fucking good in lone survivor. I'm afraid to criticize any of his other roles because in my brain, he's basically in the military. that's how good he was in lone survivor

I have to double check Ben Foster's not in the military he never was in the military no but he would make me believe he's been in there but bro he was just so good and I said to say it actually is fucked up my brain because I'm afraid to criticize this role I'm not saying the role was bad I'm not saying you know he was poorly

acted it was just the monopoly man was a little bit heavy on his character yeah that's y'all were like Ben Foster is great I was like man fuck dude did I like violate a code because he's practically... If you're going to criticize the movie, it's the writing that you can criticize. The writing. Some of the writing was a little like

it's not how I imagine conversations going. You know, like a lot of plots share too. Like they were like, hey, Jet was like, remember when we were freshmen at Villanova? Yeah, you hate exposition. Exposition. I hate exposition. This was an exposition

fest, dude. But Adam Sandler's great. He continues to be great. Um, Yeah, like probably Fun to see Philly too. Yeah, probably a somewhat like, what, low budget film that probably got like real good like returns, I would think. No, I don't think it was low budget.

I think the budget's pretty high. Yeah? Think about all the fucking, it was well shot. I mean, it was pretty well shot? And you had the, was that hill in Mannyunk? You guys don't know Philly like that. But I think my in-laws were talking about they know that hill. And there was a bunch of landmarks too.

Well, were they making allusions to Rocky? Like when the training stuff is happening in Philly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When it ran to the top of the stairs and he started throwing punches. And then Adam Stanley was throwing punches in the car. Ambitious.

It's ambitious. But yeah, it was a solid movie. Dirk Nowitzky's FaceTime, Dirk kind of mailed it in. Can I say that? You can. Okay. Those are two guys I'd love to have on the pod, Ben Foster, Dirk Novitsky. Yeah, we just fucking, we just canceled that.

I'm on my knees, man. I'm begging, dude. I'm not having Wancho on the pod then, because, because I bet you my wife's going to watch me like, oh, I listen to that pod today. She watched it on YouTube probably. Fuck, dude.

I even felt awkward being like, yeah, he's hot, right? Yeah, fuck, yeah. I felt awkward saying that, dude. The women just stopped breathing. Fucking guy's tall. Fuck him. Reed, you said you saw the new Elvis movie, right?

I did. I saw the new Elvis movie. Austin Butler plays the title character, and it is wonderful. The first, like, within the first 20 minutes, I was unsure of, of how good it was going to be

because it did a lot of jumping all over the place and a lot of interesting movement within the first 20 minutes or so. Like long strange trip. That's right. It's a Boslerman movie, right? Yep. And awesome Butler is absolutely wonderful as Elvis.

They kind of run through his whole relationship with Colonel Tom Parker. They hit his coming up, his kind of getting famous, skip through his kind of mega fame and find when his career was quote unquote in the toilet as he says in the movie and then they hit the Christmas special and then most of the movie is his residency in the international in Las Vegas so Elvis is a guy I don't know a lot about the music you would love the music in this movie Gary Clark Jr's in it Yola's in it yeah they did a great

job of intertwining the music that Elvis grew up on, Arthur Cruttup, other, you know, famous Mahalia Jackson, other famous musicians at the time, combine that with his music, combining it with current today music, like Doja Cat did a song, took a sample from a Mahalia Jackson song. And then that song was in the movie. And they did a really good job of intertwining all that music throughout the film. Were they hard on him? Yes. Yeah, yeah.

Because I always think about like the late, well, here I say, I don't know much about Elvis. I'm just saying I'm not like a huge Elvis guy, but I would love to know more about him, so I will watch. But like what I do know about him is the like the latter years, you couldn't even recognize him. Yeah. So they didn't focus on his kind of decline when he did get overweight and he, they did go deep into like the pills and how the pills took him down. but it was mostly about how his manager, Colonel Tom Parker,

kind of had this control on him, how he had too much power over Elvis. Yeah, who plays Colonel Tom in the movie? Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks does a very good job. And you almost can't recognize him because they do a fat suit and face, all this stuff, big nose.

But he does a really good job. And then at the end, the best part is at the end when they use actual footage of Elvis singing Unchained Melody at the International. Like probably his last performance where he is overweight and he is, he can barely stand. But he's sitting at the piano and he's playing and he sings this song so absolutely phenomenally. That's how the movie ends and it's really spectacular.

So when Elvis was singing, this might be a dumb question, but they're just having lip syncing like the character or what? Did I mention something? No, they have, when he's young in the movie, when he's young, Awesome Butler does the singing. But when Elvis is older in the movie, it is actually Elvis's singing voice. Okay. So they overdub when he's older,

but when he's younger through probably the Christmas special, it's Awesome Butler's actual singing voice. And then that final song when he sings an unchained melody, that's actual video from the actual event. Would you rather have been Elvis or John Lennon? Like in their prime. In their primes? No girlfriends.

No GFs. Elvis, for sure. Yeah, because there's all those British women. Yeah. No, that's for them. God, you guys sound amazing. But the other thing, what they went into, Elvis never did an international tour. He was offered millions and millions, millions, and spoiler alert.

but he did not do an international tour because Colonel Tom Parker could not leave the country. Oh my God, Reed. That's why I love his rendition of I've never been to Spain. Yeah. Because it's from the heart.

Right. He's really never been to Spain. He's really never been there. Holy shit. Yep. It's all making sense now. Go out and watch it. It's a really well done movie.

You'll like the first 20 minutes, you're unsure. And then it really gets rolling And I mean, the best part is that they include music and the influences on his music at the beginning of the movie. Like there's a BB King character. Yeah. He's in there. Arthur Cruttup, as I mentioned.

Well, there was some sentiment with Elvis that he kind of got too much credit. Culture world. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't want to say that term, you know, outright. I was going to say that. I didn't want to ruin Reed's story, but. No, well, his, I want to ask if they, if they said he stole a lot of stuff from a lot of black artists. Did he steal or was he just so heavily influenced that he like, well, his, the song that made him famous.

Yeah. I don't know that that's what I'm wondering. The song that made him famous, he recorded an Arthur Cruttup song. But even like a lot of, a lot of times, just like it's happening now, like just in the music industry, like, it was said that he got away with a lot of stuff that now, like with copyrighting and. things like that that came into play later, like he kind of capitalized and got away with and made a career off of it. Whereas the people that he kind of took that music from that,

hey, it's okay if he made a career, they should have been getting kickbacks and their family probably still should be getting kickbacks that. I was talking more about like taking, you know, black influence and running with it and getting so much credit. Oh, but no, yeah, he was taking, He was taking more to... He was taking more than influence.

Black artists. Solely black artists are just like across the board. I mean, I guess by virtue of... The song that he blew up on... It's an Arthur Cruttup song. Like unauthorized usage. Yes. Yeah.

Well, so with the Sun Records, he got famous because he recorded with Sun Records. He recorded this Arthur Crudup song. And that got play all over the radio. That's how he got discovered. Arthur Crudup never got any royalties from his. him singing this song from him playing the song from any yeah so yeah and then just before we get some mailbag i've been watching the show alone on the history channel watching our local guy tom garsting just dominating lynchburg killed a rabbit uh scottsville i think oh there was i thought there's a guy

from lynchburg on there too i see me a old one there was we had him on the show oh really yeah had him on the show and during the pandi oh he got the dog came on bro brough blessed us with some survival tips he also grew up jumping on trains and his brother would ride trains and how did this guy Tom yeah actually Reed how would you fit in on something like that

I'm like something like alone I don't think I would let that last very long really nah if it's that cold and that kind of stuff I my survivor's survival skills what is it for 250K though I mean yeah it's not like you can just stay like you have to die very specific skills or you wouldn't like these people like

like jordan take jordan for example he's been hunting and catching and he'd be like living off the land is since he was like a kid i probably won't last seven hours you do seven fuck no depends on what time he get dropped off without food yeah fuck no i did see a guy quit on the first guy on the first day one time yeah why not but did he like lose a key item no he thought he heard a bear and he was just real scared hey man fuck i'd be out there homesick man i love my wife All right, let's hit this meal bag. I started taking Athletic Greens because I wanted to see what all the hype was about. With one delicious scoop of athletic greens, you're absorbing 75 high-quality vitamins, minerals,

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I got my own mail bag and it is about Mickey Mantle. It looks to be true and if it is, if it is, it's hilarious and it's about the Yankees asking some former players to write about their best moment in Yankee Stadium. And Mickey Mantle, right, I got a blowjob under the right field bleachers by the Yankees bullpen. And then the whole bullpen. And then it says, like, this is, this is the event. And then it says, but look, then it says to write and get.

give as much detail as you can about this event. And in that section, and he does. He goes, it was about the third or fourth inning. I had a pulled groin and couldn't fuck at the time. She was a very nice girl and asked me what to do with the comb after I came in her mouth. I said,

I don't know. I'm no cock sucker. This is what Mickey Mantle wrote. I don't know. I don't know if that's true. I feel like that might not be true. This feels like one of those things that could certainly be

true, but it's the sharing of it. You know? I think it's savage. I think it's crazy. Dude, it was 1940. Yeah, this is at a time too where this is at a time where there's no clubhouse to go hang out in.

Like that was the clubhouse. Probably holding hands is going steady. And this guy's, getting he's getting blow jobs people were dying man the mortality rates were off the charts so you had to you had to fuck man you had to it was the great depression

you were going off to war the old saying was fuck him if you got him apparently in his biography he said that he fucked everything and in anything okay read so this sounds he even hit on the eventual author of his biography while she was

interviewing him yeah the guy was a whore Mickey Mantle It's just He was a man whore All right Mailbag time First up we got Jakers ass

Kill Mary or fuck Casino Robert De Niro Meet the parents Robert Toneiro Or a raging bull Robert De Niro I'm out of this

Haven't seen Raging Bull Oh that's why Dude you should See that That's a great movie You don't want to fuck him I'm not saying it like dumb and dumber is a great movie.

Like Raging Bull is a great movie. You guys, I think by the, I think by the, but you guys say so many things are a great movie. So your credibility is not a great movie. It's not a great movie. It's a disturbing movie.

Both can be true. Yeah, no question. But for me, it's not a great movie because I'm just like, there's not a time that I'm ever like, I'd like to set this, you know, two hours aside and watch Robert De Niro

and black and white beat up his girlfriend. No, but I will watch the scene with Sugar Ray Robinson and him fighting in Madison Square Garden. It's cool. I mean, like, listen, this is where I'm like, I'm, you know, I'm just not that much for film buff. I'm not a, yeah, I'm not a raging bull guy, though. I think you got to fuck that guy, though, because usually in this, in this game, when in doubt, fuck the crazy or the aggressive, right? Like, and that's clearly... Yeah, that's the craziest one, Jake Lamata, dude. By the way, Jake Lamata. in fight night was that guy. Do you remember fight night? Yeah, he was a problem.

How serious he used to get, fight night? Mm-hmm. We talk about that? The game? Seeing a lot of people fight over fight night. Yeah, the EA sports game back in the early 2000s, man. We used to, people would be, it would spill into the parking lot. I was never good at that game, so I never used to wait around for the controller,

but a lot of people used to wait around a while, right? wild to get on that controller when you wait when you wait a while to get oh my god dude you can't lose you would get drunk waiting for your next turn like you'd be in there pre-gaming and by the time your next turn came around like you were too drunk to win and fight night now thinking about that it's no it's no surprise that gaming is like a professional sport now because if you think about it like when you're with a group of people like like you can have a crowd of people watching you play game and you can be in a room watching someone that you know is going to be every person in there and there's something about it to watch it happen it's primal it's it's

it's very primal it's primal that's funny that's weird unlock something deep inside yeah but answer so so you're gonna you're gonna you're gonna fuck raging bull okay i guess right i would definitely murder the jake lamata character because he's like a spousal abuser so if i'm married to him or even fucking him like that's Probably not very good. So murdering them. He just, I don't, I don't, how big was Jake Levada? Probably like a buck 90. Yeah, I'm not worried about it.

250, but I hear you. I would definitely marry Ace Rothstein from casino. Do you remember that like Ginger gets the keys to the casino? She's like a queen at the property. That's what I was thinking you marry. You definitely marry. And he's a sucker too. He gets like $4 million in jewelry just for like being married to.

I'm like, what's the hell? And then I guess I'm fucking that crazy CIA dude from Meet the Parents. You got to kill that guy, dude. You got to kill that guy. He's got a little secret bunker we can fuck in. Nobody finds out. It's all good. These are tough.

What jinky cat? What's the funniest story you've ever heard about a coach? Yeah, a guy used to shit himself on the treadmill, just on purpose. This coach will go unnamed. What, like saving time? Don't know what he was into to where he would be walking on treadmill, half the shit. This is a coach.

It was years before me. So I play with a guy that the white guy. Yeah. Well, I don't know the race of this coach. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. What is it with white people and shit in, like places that you shouldn't be shitting? What do you mean?

It's a common theme now on the show. Like, we talk like, like, like, PFT, talking about, like, shitting, like, in the water. Amber Hurd, shitting in the bed. And then like now, like you're telling me a coach is like like willingly shitting on on a treadmill. No, in his pants. In his pants on a treadmill though. They said the guy just like it just, you know, if he had to go bad enough, he was like, I got to finish my workout. Well, put another thing on the on the cold break list.

This is this is. This is God's law. Dude, you don't do this. This isn't even like a social norm, dude. like you just don't shit your pants on a treadmill you don't shit your pants as an adult purposely anywhere so yeah this is pretty disturbing when i heard about that when i heard about that yeah that's unbelievable i can't even make this shit up i can't make this shit up dude shit jokes no i promise you this guy i trust this guy i have it on good authority there was an

NFL coach that at least on one occasion purposely shit himself on a treadmill. Now some coach is going to write me and be like, that's not fair to, now everybody's wondering if it's me. Oh, sorry. All right. Another mailbag question. What office job would Chris and Dr. Fax have in an alternate life? This is from Bobcat Bill.

Bobcat Bill, it's a good question because I have never considered actually working in an office. I don't think I'm good enough to do it. I don't think I'm organized enough to work in an office. I guess this is an office TPS reports. I don't know what the fuck what you guys you've worked in an office of sorts read I have what am I doing in the office be brutal brutally honest dude just fucking uh me now I'm going to be the HR manager oh you for sure are dude I get the now we just can't yeah I get the snoop I get the snoop I get to find out by all the employees hooking up. Two people with an issue would come to you and you just keep needling

and exaggerate the issue. Oh, it would be great. It would be great. Why are you on Facebook on your computer? Like, all that stuff, because that's what the people have to worry about like at the office, like all the extra stuff you're doing on the company phone. Bro, if you were an HR manager

at my office, I would be, I would avoid you like the plague, bro. Just telling you. Office would be on What does he want to talk to me about, dude? What did I do? Office would be on point. I'll let you know, Blake. Hey, that 25 minutes you spent on Facebook, hey, man, that could have been three more sales.

Get it together. But you also smile all the time. And nothing bothers me more than when somebody smiles the whole fucking time. And they're telling you that something's not good. Like your performance isn't good. Just fucking lay it on me. Don't smile. You'd be a smiley HR guy.

NFL coaches are great. that by the way oh fuck them yeah read what am i doing an office i was going to say if you worked in a like informational office you'd be great like if you're like oh someone's like a travel center like someone's traveling from out of town here to charlottesville and you're oh go check out this place yeah selling people on experiences yes exactly yeah that's good that's good well hey there might be a couple offices that are like that they pop in and there's like, oh, hey, go see Jim if you want to, or go see Chris. Chris knows all the spots.

Chris knows all the local dives. That's right. But you don't like talking on the phone because it's like you could maybe be like, piggybacking off what he's saying. You could probably be like a digital assistant. Oh, what do they do? You just like, like what he said, like if people need to know about reservations or where they can go in Charlottesville, like you can do it digitally.

You could pick up the phone or you can. Hey, I scheduled you here. I feel like I'd be pretty good at the front desk, man. I was going to say, I was going to say receptionist. I'd be pretty good at the fucking front desk. You're pretty good with, like, people that you don't know, like the first time you meet them. Yep. Especially in that circumstance, nobody would be, I would, I would revel in being the gatekeeper for somebody.

Oh, man. Just to tell people that he's not available. Damn. You're one of those guys. See that? Those are the guys we get mad at. You're the guy, you're the bouncer at the club. No, I'm not the bouncer at the club.

Yes, it is the gatekeeper. No, no, not to look for a physical altercation. No, not that. Not that. But you're looking down the line and you can think in your head, oh, I can't wait to deny this guy because he has sneakers on. No, no, no, that's not it. It's more, it's more, it's more like. I've got a movie role for you.

In the next entourage movie, you're Lloyd's replacement. Lloyd's, next assistant. assistant you're telling everybody oh no he kid not available not available I love to do that

and it would be perfect Ari Gold would be like walk around with talking about having to tuck it I'd have to tuck it all day long having it you just telling people to fuck off

no we can't no he's got six meetings today oh I'd be super cool too and people I love you know what I love is like

if somebody's really mad at me just like not reacting and being like can I take a message? You know, that type of thing is right up my alley. I would never get mad.

I would never yell back. You could get as personal as you wanted on the phone. I'm just doing my job. I'm the gatekeeper. What are you doing about someone who's not taking no for an answer and said, you know what? I'll sit right here in the lobby

until he comes out. All right? Would you like a magazine? Sit here all day. And my guy is going to have a back door that you can get out if somebody sitting in a lobby. And you should talk to him.

You should, there just talk to them but then stop the conversation randomly yeah and then pick it up again just be awkward as fuck we're the only two people in the audit in the little uh in the little foyer uh and it's echoey uh and it's awkward any companies out there that want to let let me be HR guy and Chris be the door guy but if I like you man we'll talk about baseball what happened last night in the basketball game we'll talk about like here's a question who walks in that would compromise you, like, doing your job-le duties? Like, what celebrity?

Like, what celebrity walks through the door for a meeting at your office that you might be shell-shocked, like, ask for a pitcher, something that you're not supposed to do at work? I really don't break character. No one. I don't believe it. Willie Nelson walks in to see your boss. No, I'm going to give Willie, like, an eighth.

I'm going to be like, listen, you're going to have to wait a little bit, but I do have something in my car for you, free of tax. I finally saw this movie with Willie Nelson called Thief. It's fucking good. Willie Nelson's good in it. Beef. Beef. Oh.

I was like, what the fuck? Beef. Watch a movie called beef. Beef. Starring Willie Nelson. Nah. It's the Kyle Long biopic. Nate, thanks for hanging out.

We're just in here churning out content. So we do, man. Blest. Hashtag blessed. Hashtag blessed. And so are you. I mean, that was gold, guys. We really put it all out on the floor there. All right, well, we will be back Friday with Billy Football.

Maybe. Can't wait. Maybe. Billy Football.