Green Light with Chris Long - Browns Bengals Recap. Jon Hamm Talks Fantasy Football, Acting Roles, & St. Louis Blues. Clowney Film Review.
Episode Date: September 18, 2020(1:29) - TNF Review. (18:05) - Thursday Time Machine Punishments. (25:00) - Shoutouts. (29:09) - Macon's 6 Pack of Questions. (42:00) - Jadeveon Clowney Film Review. (50:24) - Jon Hamm on the St. Loui...s Blues, his favorite acting roles, Hamm vs Rudd as bigger fanboys, and Fantasy Football. (1:31:50) - Macon and Chris cast actors for top NFL Coaches. Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
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Happy Friday, everybody. This is the Greenlight Pot. I'm your host, Chris Long, and this is my esteemed co-host Making Gunner.
The Browns are back, baby. They are back. They're back to be in the Browns. We're going to do our Thursday time machine off the top.
Let's do our picks as we see them for Thursday night football as of 6.09 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. I'll start. I've got Sinci getting the W. Shocking the world. Browns are a little beat-up.
defensively.
Give me Burrow, 2623 with a game winner from Randy the cramper.
Yeah, I have the same score nearly.
2613, I've got it, in favor of the Cleveland Browns.
Congratulations, you won.
Congratulations, you won.
I guess if it's a close ball game, we're looking at an even one-to-one split.
Well, we're just, it'll be the winning ball club here because you went bingles.
Oh, I did go bingoes.
mongles.
I'm going Browns.
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Got a great show lined up for you.
I just got done watching the
barn burner of a Thursday night game
between the Cincinnati Bengals
and the Cleveland Browns,
which is a sentence I never thought I'd say.
But here we are.
And on today's pod, we'll get to it in a bit here,
got a bunch of NFL news.
that kind of popped up this week that
Macon and I are going to hit.
Going to do a film review on Judavian Clowny,
his first week in Tennessee,
the game Sunday against the Broncos.
That's kind of more hardcore football stuff.
And then we've got John Hamm, dude.
John Hamm.
I'll fill you in on that later.
John Hamm's coming on the show.
And in the spirit of an actor joining us,
we're going to cast NFL coaches in their biophiles.
Now, that's not John, just Macon and myself, we're going to do that.
But we'll talk to John Hamm about a lot, including his sports fandom, St. Louis Roots,
where to St. Louis football fans go once the Rams left, you know, his ride as a blues fan,
which we share that experience last year, but he's been a blues fan forever and a whole bunch
of other stuff, including his stint as a soft core porn production assistant.
All the amazing things he's done.
It's just that one.
I was intrigued.
we'll get to that a little bit later in the pod.
But what I saw tonight, man, entertaining ballgame.
I thought as I was getting ready to watch the game,
this could be one of those two ships passing in the night situations,
you know, with all the buildup this week,
all the negativity on the Cleveland side,
and all the righteous hopefulness on the Sincy side.
The people are buying Joe Burrow as they once were with Baker Mayfield
to a greater degree.
There's never been, you know,
in recent history, at least a quarterback who was so unique in the hype he created out of college
than Joe Burrow. And that includes Baker Mayfield, who wasn't even the consensus won until late in the
week. But there was a time three years ago, and that felt like a decade ago that I was sitting
in, I think it was Adel Frisco's watching the game with Malcolm Jenkins and a couple guys on the
Eagles when Tyrod Taylor exited the ball game and we're finishing our dinner and we're watching
this Baker kid get to work.
And there was that excitement.
And it was on a Thursday night, of course.
So it's kind of come full circle.
Now here we are.
And there's a new exciting quarterback in the division with Baker on the other side line.
Kind of feeling probably pretty trapped right now.
Slumping commercials everywhere.
I mean, you can't stop the commercials.
And that's the thing about commercials.
It's not like you can tell the people like, go daddy or whatever the fuck you signed up for
to like, hey, shut it down.
I threw three picks this week.
Those commercials are going to run.
The only thing to get you out of that slump is going out and playing well and playing with confidence.
And I'm getting the sense people were ready to burn it down after week one.
Our stance here at Greenlight Pod was we're not talking about the Browns until they show us we're a good team.
Not saying they're not going to be a good team, but I refuse to talk about them until they show that they're capable of being good team.
And at the end of the night, both kids showed out talking about Burrow and Baker.
Joe Burrow continued to show poise last week.
you know, he was tested.
There was the mixing turnover down in the goal line in the red area.
There was the kind of Brett Farr of shit with the little shovel pass right into Melvin
Ingram's hands.
He was tested and he answered the bell.
This week he was chin checked.
And he's responded two weeks in a row.
I mean, didn't get the win in either, but definitely responded.
And the sense is right now that you take Joe Burrow any day of the week.
But Baker Mayfield really fought back tonight.
And he made some really nice throws.
And I think Kevin Stefanski, who's the right guy for the job in Cleveland,
had a really great night as well.
But the main driver for this Cleveland team this year,
I truly believe this is going to be that run game.
The story for me, besides the quarterback play, were those backs.
They rushed for over 200 yards tonight.
They made it look easy at times.
and part of that is a function of Cincinnati,
but who's, by the way, missing a couple interior guys,
including Gino Atkins, not a minor, a mission
when it comes to lineup tonight against a two-headed monster
that looks like the best one-two punch in a league.
I mean, there was a point late,
and Joe Thomas said this in post-game.
They couldn't even stop the run with a safety down.
We're talking about Cincinnati here.
That opened up to play action.
And there was a drive late in the ball game
that for me stood out at the time
It's a one score game.
It's 2823, I believe.
Burrow just turned a Baker-Mayfield pick into like a long touchdown drive.
Impressive, impressive sequence there.
And they go to Chubb first play, 24 yards.
I mean, he doesn't have to change his gate until he's three yards down the field.
When he runs into his own dudes, like a moving wall of orange and brown.
And then they go hunt for a huge chunk.
And they cap that drive off with a hunt.
touchdown. And that was a two-minute drive with no passes. The guys on TV remarked, I mean,
like, maybe you should kind of slow it down. How do you not throw the ball and score too fast?
It wasn't a short field. So they're up 35, 23, and I said to myself, this can be their identity.
I mean, they, you know, you want to be dynamic, obviously. He's defancy's exciting. He did a great job
of getting Baker out of the pocket tonight. He played to his strengths more. But,
the run can set up to pass, as Joe pointed out, and in the event that they have a lead,
and they'll have leads this year, this can be scary for defense is trying to get the ball back.
It just chokes the life out of you. It takes the hope out of you, the wind out of your
sales when guys are breaking off 12-yard chunks. It was hiding in plain sight. We were getting ready
to look at this game, and I said, you're focused on the quarterbacks. The best collection of
running backs we'll see all week or on this field tonight. You know, you've got the guy Belichick gave
such high praise to last year famously in Joe Mixon. You know, you've got possibly the most complete
back in the league in Chubb. And you've got a guy who was way too talented to fall in the lap of
a Cleveland Brown's franchise in Cream Hunt. And we all know how that happened. But the quarterbacks,
they both started out hot. Both coaches were great as well. So I don't want to take anything away from
Taylor's fancy, but, you know, I think you'd be bored if I just talked about the coaching.
Burrow comes out and throws a strike to Green for like 40 yards right off the bat and you're like, oh boy.
I mean, there was, we knew Cleveland was banged up defensively, but there was more life in that first minute or two than there was last week altogether in that low-scoring ball game against the Chargers.
Rough deal overturned kind of easily.
He drags his one knee out of bounds.
That's two catches in a row.
Bad luck for AJ Green.
You've got the push-off in the end.
on last week that would have been the game winner.
And then you have that baron that gets called back.
But Joe's got a fourth and four conversion and a sack from Claiborne makes it three
nothing.
They have to settle for a field goal.
Baker comes right out slinging it, strikes two times.
They move the pocket right off the bat.
And you can just feel it.
People watching TV are like, okay.
People in the field are like, okay.
Baker's good on the move.
a la Kirk Cousins a little bit
with Stefansky getting
people
in situations that play to their strengths
moving them.
And then you have a third and sixth
scramble that that was really, to me,
it was a great indicator. He's, he's hot.
He's thrown a couple, you know,
piss missiles, you know,
outside the pocket. Then he scrambles
for a first time and he runs
up and breaks up kind of a fight.
It was like a little thing.
But I do think Baker is kind of
and maturing where last year I do feel like Baker would have been in the middle
jawing as if he was a position player. He ran right up. He said, guys, let's get to the
huddle. Chubb touchdown 7 to 3. And Baker sent a lead to 14 to 3 on the double move,
which was a great sign for the Browns and for O'Dell Beckham, who we've been wondering
when was going to break out of this slump, relatively speaking. That double move was set up
by comebacks and that's a really good sign. I'm sure he'd love to have the touchdown.
They called that back. They got in.
anyways, but 14-3, nonetheless.
And Baker threw good balls all night.
Even in the pocket, he did have his mistakes, like the bad intentional grounding.
And, of course, the late pick, which Aikman said, one last week looked a lot like that one against
Baltimore.
Of course, I haven't been able to watch that entire tape.
Take that with a grain of salt, all the success he had tonight, because it is the Bengals,
and they are pretty rough defensively.
But the Browns did keep him at arm's length all night.
It always felt close and interesting because of the other kid playing.
And the other kid is Joe Burrow.
Burrough's next possession down 14-3.
He made some mistakes.
You know, there was the timeout, the botch snap, the boot spin, which was kind of like a moment where you're like, nah, Joe, like you can't do stuff like that.
It was the same kind of thing with the flip last week.
But he's even really decisive and calm when he fucks up.
And that's like an interesting quality, if you know what I mean.
A possession later, though, he throws a.
touchdown to Usama. And that was his first of his NFL career, but it was this
Stefansky concept. You know, the kids open by the pylon. They went, I think, two verticals,
and then, you know, the corner bit on something underneath. And he just found that dead space.
And before you know, so they're down 2110, which is a big deal. And he knew he needed points
with the chance at a two-for-one for Cleveland.
They get three, and it goes to, what, 21-13 at the half, I believe it was?
After the half, there's a wild sequence where the Browns, like, inexplicably can't get in the end zone.
Chubb touchdown is called back, which leads to this goal-line stand, which, again, proves,
like, you've had two touchdowns called back now, finish defensively.
Guys chasing the ball, getting people down.
It makes a big difference.
But this is where it gets interesting, right?
The Browns get the ball back.
because their big-time playmaker makes one of the biggest plays of the game.
And that's Miles Garrett.
My pick for DPOY, I'll admit, Aaron Donald's just so chalky.
I'm trying to keep it interesting.
And Miles Garrett's my guy.
Shout out to Waterboys.
But he made a big play and he showed up in that moment.
And I love the way he did it.
This was really interesting for those of y'all who like little inside baseball here,
pass rush-wise.
A TE stunt is when the tackle penetrates first in the B gap between the tackle and the guard.
And then the end loops around.
usually you see the big guy being the penetrator and the little guy looping.
They kind of inverted it because Miles is a big body and Miles can rush inside.
He pops inside, 97 pops outside.
Usually you run a TE, you either try to pick the tackles inside shoulder,
ricochet off and get to the quarterback and the guard has to make a decision
whether he latches on to you or comes off you and the looper can make a play.
Miles jabbed inside the guard's body and when you jab inside that guard's body,
and when you jab inside that guard's body and you know, Miles is athletic so he can jab like all the way in
and then pop back out. It was just like such a unique way to run that T.E. So smooth. Gets the ball out. And there it is.
Your best player, quite possibly on the team, makes one of the biggest plays of the game. And there's a touchdown to follow that they should have had on that goal line stand. They're up 2713. And it feels like the doors are getting blown off. So you get this big play. There were no fans in the stands. But there's one of this.
I mean, there were a few fans in stands.
When you're a rookie quarterback and you get shin-checked like that, backed up on the goal line,
two-score game, what are you going to do?
This is your Joe Burrow moment.
What do you do now?
Last week, on a lesser scale, responded, golly, this week he did it even bigger.
Not the best drive, but the fourth and four, by the way, I think they were four-for-four
on fourth down all night.
He scrambles, uses legs, not the first time, you know, on the evening.
they end up having to kick because of a Tyler boy drop, but it's points, you know, and that's a response.
27, 16, I believe it is.
And then after the Baker pick, which I talked about earlier, he has another lull, okay?
He got hit a few minutes ago.
He makes a series of bad throws behind 89, behind green, but on fourth down, again, throws a strike for 13 yards, the tight end, I believe it was, or maybe it was Boyd.
slant touchdown 2723 okay that's responding dude twice the big hit by miles again then you've got a
response coming off his three really abhorrent throws relatively speaking the guy threw the ball 60 times
you're going to have some bad ones one of the first rookies to ever throw the ball for 60 times
without a pick and he had a couple bad throws but he responded then there's the four minute mode
four minute mode being when Cleveland's like we're running this fucking clock out we got the two
biggest, baddest backs in the league, and you can't stop us. And guess what? They couldn't.
But Joe responded again to cap off the night, another response, you know, down on the road.
You been hit, your tight ends hurt. You and AJ Green aren't connecting a ton of targets, not a lot of
catches. The game might be over, but he finishes the night with a beautiful touchdown pass
in traffic in the red zone. So positives for Sincere, obviously, Joe Burrow. But you got Joe Mixing
going in the past game. The returners, you know, a nice look for them, although we wear
number 40. I don't get that. Positive is for Cleveland. You got Odell going out of his funk. That's huge.
And you got Baker out of his funk too, you know, out of the pocket on the edge. You got the dogs off
and the media is going to chill out for a week, even though I don't know if that's the right thing to do
because I want to see them beat a good defense. Guys, the future is bright in Cincinnati and at least
there's a baby step in the right direction for Cleveland. And this can prove to be the toughest
division in football, depending on what happens out west. I mean, I think the NFC West is probably
a chalky pick for that. AFC North is right there. That was the game. Huge shout out to Joe Buck,
okay? What an announcement to have totally shocked me. I mean, he's well deserving, but I don't
pay attention to that stuff. And one of the best dudes you could ever meet, one of the best of what he
does. He took me out my first night in St. Louis, you know, showed me around.
he's tremendous of what he does and he's very well deserving and he's a guy still keep in touch
with so like it's kind of cool to see your friend get humbled like that on national TV like
impromptu and that's just who he is very very happy go lucky about it and didn't even make it
about him just got back to calling the game so shout out to Joe Buck unfortunately now I am
0 and 2 on Thursday night time machine I'm losing to a guy who weighs 120 pounds and
never played football in high school or at any level.
My co-host making gunner, spoiler alert.
So without further ado, let's get down to business.
As I just talked about, the game is wrapped for you folks listening on Friday morning.
And we got to talk about punishments for Thursday time machine.
We had submissions as we asked for.
Thank you guys so much for being interactive.
We do read the comments, make and read some of the very cruel comments that you guys leave on the internet.
about him, but he also reads the good ones too.
Yeah, I said I didn't read them. I decided
to start reading them and some of them are indeed
mean. And
yeah, make you think about things. Consider your
life, consider your choices.
Here's one with no periods. Not many
of the comments are 100%
on spelling. Okay?
This guy just said, fuck the periods.
We got three stars. Making
stinks. Get a better co-host man,
that making guy is the worst. No periods
the entire sentence.
I respect that.
Why waste a character?
Just get straight to the point.
Hey, I don't agree with these folks.
Not, neither do I.
That's why you're...
I think the content is an A plus.
Yeah.
The listen, unfortunately,
like a C minus B.
And it's because of me.
I think you're terrific.
No, I was thinking the same thing about you, dude.
Yeah.
Don't really like what I bring to the table here.
Here's a comment.
A stoner and a gunner.
Did you read this one?
I did.
Give it to me again.
C-Long blazing that cush
and the takes, best pods are when he's a little ripped.
How do you know when I'm ripped?
Gunner talks like he's eaten an edible.
Gunner, by the way, is what I think he thinks your name is.
He's eating an edible 30 minutes prior to recording.
Good football insight and a great pod.
Thank you, Burntown.
Burntown.
Not the first time I've heard that.
It might shock some of you folks that I don't do the weed.
Never got high in your life.
Nah.
and but I have been told people often wonder it's not just that I sound like it they just think
I I I do drugs I don't if you had to do drugs and you were trying to buy some some of the
devil's lettuce you just approaching somebody like where would you go to find it I would call you
would just call me yeah it's kind of incriminating me here but like what are you going to say
like you meet a dealer what are you saying to the dealer you got any trees
because I tell you what, that's how it was first said to me back in the year 2003-ish.
My boy Matt and I went down to Greensboro and we found ourselves at a gas station
to an ACC basketball tournament.
And a guy approached said, y'all want any trees.
That's such as like, that's a police officer.
Yeah, don't, maybe, maybe.
Matt was, well, I won't incriminate anybody else except for you.
Matt knew what he was talking about.
Yeah, so maybe he was on the devil's lettuce.
I did not.
Yeah.
Let's talk about punishments here.
Okay.
Let's just read them in real time here.
Somebody said, Whalen must design a costume for you, then you must wear it, take a picture,
and post it on social media with hashtag I lost, but I won.
That's too gentle.
Yeah, creative idea.
I like it.
Too gentle.
I like it a lot.
And if this is on my social media, no real downside.
Not a big following over here.
Yeah.
Loser gets the winner's face tattooed on the right butt cheek.
Let me just say this.
That's not going to happen.
But cheek misspelled.
But what's our demo like non-qualifiers?
You wanted to be like an indie pod.
Yeah, we're getting a little bit of everything.
Yeah.
Let me say this though.
Danny Mandola owes me a tattoo from the night the Virginia Cavaliers
whooped the Texas Tech Red Raiders also collected on my guy Des Bryant that night
but that was cash money.
Danny owes a tattoo.
Also, I do have a Ken Flageal tattoo for the Philly Faithful
that I'd like to remind you guys sometimes.
I keep saying I'm going to reveal it on the pod eventually I will,
but it's right here on my rib cage.
It's nice and big, you know?
Yeah, you've seen it.
I can attest.
Yeah, you can attest.
I think the losers should have to wear.
a tech outfit to the next Commonwealth Cup.
Either of you is able to attend.
No chance.
We're not doing that.
Just rescheduled for December the 12th, by the way, breaking news.
Loser makes a music video of One Direction and posts it their Instagram.
I don't really listen to One Direction.
I like this one.
Luser has to stay in a Waffle House for 24 hours.
That's really good.
I might have meant that to 12.
24.
Exceedingly punitive.
No, it's not.
Well, I mean, that's like...
I get a lot of work done in Waffle House.
Right, and it's not the Waffle House challenge
where you have to eat a bunch of stuff.
No, supposedly for every waffle you eat,
you get an hour dock.
Right, right, right, right.
Keep that one, Cowboy Reed.
Keep that on the short list.
Loser of the competition has to eat
a watermelon on IG Live
completely indifferent to the camera
without a mention of why or what you're doing.
I don't mind this, but the trouble is
it's kind of an uneven distribution of punishment here.
I would have to do it on yours.
Which would be embarrassing for me
Because they'd be like
Chris has a dude at his house
Eating watermelon
With no context
Well, I'm known at this point
Yeah, you are
Who submitted that one?
Big Titty lovers, zero zero
Okay
Just checking
Grow up
JP3 says
Loser baby sits the winner's kid
While the winner takes his wife
To draw the loser's dog
That's great.
One problem I see with this.
Yeah.
I don't have a kid.
Yeah, you don't have a kid.
You could watch my dog.
Not interested.
That dog is so hyper, not my kind of dog.
Whoa.
No, we're working on that.
And she actually really is a good dog.
No, she really is.
I got a hot take for you.
Not all dogs are good dogs.
I'm not saying your dog's not a good dog.
I'm just saying like the jury's still out.
Okay.
But no, she really is a good dog.
I swear.
Okay, well maybe I'll find out when I babysit your dog.
And I take your wife to dinner.
Since you guys are high of zero concerns there.
Since you guys are so high on the bills,
loser has to do a table smash,
Bill's Mafia style.
Not bad.
There's a viral component there.
That'd be good for the show.
So far, I like Waffle House.
I agree.
I agree.
So Waffle House moves on from week two.
And week three,
we're going to roll this over one more week.
and you guys send us in some more submissions
for the punishment of who loses this year's
Thursday nighttime machine.
Subscribe, rate, review,
leave the punishment in your review.
Yep, do it.
And we appreciate you big titty lovers, zero, zero.
I do want to give a couple shoutouts out this week.
First off, I want to shout out Scott Turner
on a serious note.
I kind of laid into Scott Turner on a pod.
I didn't mean to lay into him, but it was about the Rooney rule,
and he was a casualty of the frustration being,
like, listen, there's no denying that there's nepotism
in the NFL in the coaching ranks.
Like, that's rampant.
And I said some things about Scott Turner,
and I said that, you know, hearsay led me to believe
that he had stifled the development
or the happiness of Cam Newton.
In Carolina, I don't know that to be true.
It's what I heard.
And maybe I was a little unfair to him.
You know, congratulations Scott Turner on your first game in Washington and beating my birds.
You know, called a good game.
Yeah.
Called it, called a nice, fine game.
Yeah.
And I like to write my wrongs.
I don't know that I was wrong, but just to show you, I do it both ways here.
Worthy of a shout out.
Yeah, Scott Turner.
Shout out to Scott Turner.
A lot of motion.
You love motion, Scott Turner.
Beatles.
I want to shout out the Beatles.
like uh like paul mccartney like those guys i'm finally coming around on some of it um yeah i know
it's been like this thing that i like to antagonize beetles fans and tell them that john lennon
wasn't the greatest guy and that um i don't get the beatles per se i think the problem was i was
looking at the wrong stuff abbey road just doesn't move me like that uh
magical mystery tour is where I'm finding the bangers. And I do appreciate the influence that the Beatles
had on some of my favorite music. So there, I'm saying uncle on a few things today. It's like I'm
turning over a new leaf. Do you like anything mainstream? Yeah, I do. Aside from the media.
Yeah, I would say so. I mean, that's, are you saying I'm like a hipster or a contrarian?
Very much a contrarian, yeah. Yeah, but my favorite couple bands are so chalky. I mean, like,
Think about like, oh, I love Led Zeppelin and the Rolling Stones.
Like, where am I on that?
Okay.
I've never taken it out on those guys.
Okay.
Here's the thing.
Most mainstream music sucks because most people have bad taste.
So that must be the biggest conflict when you're an artist in a non-production business,
a very subjective business that like the better you're doing, chances are you're doing bad.
Magical mystery tour.
You're talking like Penny Lane.
Lane's a good song. I'm not so into Penny Lane. I thought you might not be. Oh, okay. Yeah.
It was a little trap I set for you. Oh, it was a trap. It was a trap. Good trap. And a good song. I meant that part. Let's shout out the Denver newspaper, eh? Okay. Shout out newspapers in general. Yeah. They're going through it. What, uh, what are we in Denver? A post gazette of some sort? I don't know, but they had this article that you brought to my attention, uh, where the headline, Denver Post.
Yeah, what was it?
It was about the tight end in Denver,
whose last name is but.
And they actually printed in fucking Helvetica size,
you know, 24, bold,
but ready for some action.
Who signs off on that?
Well, the editor.
I mean, the writers,
the writers do not write their own headline.
So this is an editor.
This day and age,
probably good on you.
He's getting the,
clicks, he's getting the eyes.
Yeah, well, I mean, I guess the pinnacle of the Denver,
I mean, Denver Post never thought they'd be on the greenlight pod.
And thanks to that editor, they are.
That's right.
But that's just gratuitous man or woman.
That is, that is disgraceful.
It's trolling.
Yeah.
But is ready for some action, please.
Grow up.
You too, big titty lover, Zero, zero.
So, this week's news.
I mean, or I guess you'd call it a six pack of question.
from my man making gunner.
Big Ben feels like a car accident this week, Chris.
What do you think about that?
Well, I wouldn't expect anything less from old Big Ben.
I know I felt like I was in a car accident,
but what I did was like I played a position for a living.
I mean, I'm not saying he doesn't take a beating.
My man, he has like an inflammation fetish, you know?
Like, I think my man is just such a throwback.
He likes to feel pain on Mondays and Tuesdays.
And he did take a bit of a bit.
beating, but did you see the play he fell on Zach Banner,
who was actually out for the year and Ben was writhing in pain?
Yeah.
And then he looked over and was like, oh, that guy's actually hurt.
Right.
Fuck, I hope he's okay.
As you know, and I probably wouldn't be mentioning it
if both my Super Bowl picks weren't 1 and 0.
Victory lap for me, early victory lap.
Pittsburgh, we're back, Ben's back.
He really did look like he had some good zip on the ball.
Keeping upright is going to be the problem.
And so I hope he feels better by Sunday.
We haven't gotten a chance to talk about Monday night football,
but briefly, my man at Center for the Giants, Gates, I think.
Yeah, Nick Gates, snap the ball quicker,
and all problems will be solved.
I think he's just got to snap the ball quicker.
That was a slow floater getting back to Daniel Dimes.
Yeah.
And that's the only issue.
Correct that.
That's it.
Super Bowlbound.
I mean, you get that snap off quicker.
That's right.
Yeah.
Hey, what's the most important injury this week?
There's a lot to choose from, although I'm not sure where the numbers are.
Important.
What an interesting descriptor.
Yeah, important.
Yeah.
Impactful?
Yeah, sure.
I mean, the big name injury.
Mike Thomas, I guess, is one that's long term, a concern because you know it's a high ankle.
I had a high ankle.
It's going to be a fucking pain in the ass to get back.
from if he wants to play through it.
And that can change your flexion
to your ankle forever.
So I hope he's cautious,
especially because I don't think
they need him to win this weekend.
He has other weapons in Sanders now.
I mean, like, you've got a guy
who can be the number one for a week
or two weeks.
I worry about Zach Banner,
who I just mentioned in a big way.
The whole right side of that line
is crushed.
You know, DeCastro's been out.
Wisniewski, who Eagles fans remember
and Chiefs fans remember.
He's trying to go three,
three rings in five years on three different teams.
He came in the game and exited with an injury as well.
So you talk about Ben,
the only thing that could be worse is it could be his blindside
that's exposed.
Las Vegas has got a problem if Trent Brown isn't 100%
or doesn't play because Cam Jordan is one of the best in the game, period.
And you're going to need that dude
to hold up in protection if you want Derek Carr to have the
confidence to push the ball down the field,
which he has not been that guy in recent history.
The Rams have won in Gerald Everett
that you want to keep an eye on
because of what they've been doing with 12 personnel
and that could fundamentally change the way they play this weekend
against the, you know, my Eagles.
So there's a lot to look at.
No more important though long term, I think, than Mike Thomas.
ESPN released some stadium rankings.
of the NFL clubs.
Yeah, I saw that.
Lambo Field came out as a top dog.
Your thoughts.
Well, what, did you, was there anything in that, that breakdown that stood out to you
is just garbage?
I didn't realize I met life was 10 years old.
You could have told me four and I would have said, okay, yeah.
No, because I remember when they came out of it, with it, they had like a, they still
have this.
I think they have an indoor ski lift at the mall next door.
Like, that was like majorly futuristic when it came out.
Also, what's up with the seating?
you ever notice that
the grays some of them are gray
some of them are black like what's going on there
looking cool is what's going on
it does look cool actually
I will say this
they played it so safe that it's not going to age hard
but it's just going to be perpetually middling
okay that's fair
and the weirdness factor is going to be that
two teams are going to share it
continually which
not so sexy when there are those two teams
at this juncture
I would say the disappointing
one for me was Soldier Field at 22.
Yeah. And I heard you mutter that
earlier as you were reading the list.
They blended the old with the new.
I think it's beautiful. Yep.
I think it's beautiful. And people were hating on it.
Here's one. I'm anti-Cowboy Stadium.
They have that at 6. I've said this before.
It looks like some sort of an
appliance.
Yeah.
Not quite like toaster oven level
of the Arizona Stadium out in the desert, but
not a, not a beautiful stadium in my
opinion. It's like if your kitchen counter
had a Roomba, it would look like that.
Yeah, just clean the crumbs.
Yep, clean the crumbs off your counter.
Long, sterile tunnels, not a big fan of these sterile vibe
that a lot of these new stadiums are bringing to the table.
I used to, no joke, look up at that scoreboard
32 times a game to see if it was going to fall and kill us all.
Not that you'd be able to forecast that,
but that thing's scary in person.
And I'm trusting, you know.
People you've never met.
It's the reason I don't get on the rides at Bush Gardens.
It's the reason I'll get on the rides at Bush Gardens.
Raymond James is too high at eight.
They have the ship.
That's it.
That's it, dude.
Raymond James, I don't even think it has a parking lot.
Whenever you look at Raymond James on end zone film in the NFL,
it shows you like the shot of the scoreboard before every play.
There's parked cars in some field that they don't even mow.
I'm just like, this is, yeah, no, Raymond James, not so much.
I thought they had hard rock too low.
You said that as well.
Awesome renovation.
I mean, that Hard Rock has been a lot of different things,
including Joe Robbie Stadium about 30 years ago at this point.
But the renovation they just did has that thing looking like live.
Yeah, that thing looks on South Beach.
Yeah, that thing looks tight.
But what they did knock them for, and I will agree,
and we talked about this.
We talked about this a lot.
It's located in Miami Gardens, Florida.
Which you're not a big fan of the geography in Miami.
Nah, I don't think I've ever actually set foot in Miami,
though I've been to Miami every other year for the past.
decade and a half.
Yeah, there's a bunch of places you could be in Miami and not know where you are.
FedEx Field is like a total default stadium.
It should just say like go state on the side like in one of these like the program,
the movie the program.
Right.
That stadium is aged super hard.
It's it's like somebody that rips heaters and drinks a fifth of vodka every day.
Like that's what the Washington football team.
commandeering the soul of a building does to that building.
Yeah, and then put it an hour away and make it so you can't get to a ballgame and less than...
And it's ugly, it's ugly. It's just an ugly stadium. Yeah, that's enough on stadiums.
All righty then. Hey, Chris, what do you make of the Cowboys struggles?
I am really glad you asked because that could have been a really bad day in the city of Philadelphia
had the Cowboys pulled off the nightcap there.
I'm not going to freak out yet on them,
but I'm also not going to hitch my wagon to the Cowboys.
I did that last year a bit.
I believe it when I see it.
There was an interesting article on For the Win,
written by Stephen Ruiz,
and he illustrated what I was really suspicious of,
which is that Mike kind of looks the same,
And that offense looks kind of the same.
It's so vanilla.
He talked about scouting himself.
We all know about the documentaries and all that stuff.
We know about last summer and all the different things he was going to do.
We talked about more varied personnel usage, more pre-stat motion, faster tempo, and Ruiz laid it out.
Sunday, they go 11 personnel, 83%, and they're 12 personnel, the rest of the plays, essentially.
They actually managed to get less diverse than they were last year in Green Bay.
and that was using the same two personnel groupings.
More pre-snap motion, nah, 4.3% of plays Sunday were employed pre-snap,
and that's 26 in the league.
So not getting more dynamic.
He said faster tempo, no.
You know, you got three snaps and no huddle.
And that's outside situational ball at the end of the half and the end of the game.
So that didn't push the ball downfield.
And that's what it felt like.
If you're watching that game, you're looking up and you're like,
how do they have 17 points?
How does the team this talented, unless Brandon Staley's a Hall of Famer in the future,
look this pedestrian.
And maybe it's week one.
Maybe it's the fact that he's facing a brand new coordinator.
He was going to be more vanilla.
But Dax not pushing the ball down the field.
7.1 yards on average.
That's a pretty humble click there.
And he wasn't accurate for that,
that distance with regularity.
So I think they beat the Falcons this weekend.
The corners are trouble there,
and they still are very good at wide out.
I think they survive,
but they're going to have to really,
they're going to have to spice things up.
Blake Jarwin out,
not bother you at all?
It does,
but it's not like he's been a game changer for them.
Him turning into a game changer could really,
could really take them to the next level.
Yeah, but difficult to envision
that he would have really changed.
He's not going to do. No. No. No. Do we need preseason? It's a great question. Maybe you and I do from a
podcast standpoint, but I actually don't think so. Like on Monday we killed it. That's what you're asking, right?
That's right. Yeah, no, we don't need a fucking preseason. Not here. Okay. You meant the NFL.
Yeah. NFL does not need preseason. Coaches, well, I guess they're part of the NFL, but coaches and this is the part. I feel for
unproven players. That's the only thing that I feel like, you know, if there was a hybrid
situation that they could work out, I would love it if they had a way to service the young
players, but get the older players rest, mitigate the risk, and get coaches who are huge
control freaks need to run through everything. They're reps, because that's what I realized this week.
I don't know if it was the Vic Fangio thing, but I was like, damn, these guys really did need
preseason because if you think about it as football players we line up in team periods and take 40 plays
every single practice and training camp in pads whatever football is football you just have to know
which period you're in to be more cognizant of the way you're playing coaches need like rapid fire
variance and situational football they need things to pop up the only way for them to rep that
is to go play a game that's why we always do these stupid mock games on
Friday where you run outside in your shorts and you walk around and they blow the whistle and you walk
through your plays. It's not a mock. It's not like a walk through, but it's it's situation. They move from
quarter to quarter to quarter. And we as players would be like annoyed with it. It's all for the coaches.
That's why we spend all day in meetings for the coaches. Coaches and unproven players, but for the other guys,
not so much. Everything we feared this past week, I think didn't happen. Penalties were down,
miss tackles were down 3% from last year so that was something that actually shocked me
drop pass rate down 4% fall starts down 15% this year the highest penalized team week
one nine penalties last year was cleveland with 18 um and scoring was up so if you'd have told me
hey listen they're telling the refs to swallow their whistles week one to kind of to kind of damage
control the sloppiness of the games
because the last thing you want to see is sloppy football
and flags
that doesn't explain the mistackles not changing
the drop pass rate it also
for the NFL who would love to hold on
that preseason money in perpetuity
it also is kind of like
hustling backwards for them
if they're gonna if they're gonna tell
refs to swallow their whistles
but I think they also know that
the next time we see a CBA is during
Mahomes' next contract so it's gonna be a while
and I think if anything
we'll look back at this and say
hey we were fine without it
I don't know what a bargaining chip
that's going to be whenever this
this comes up again
let's do film review
the long look
as we call it here
just talking gridiron
like you guys like it
straight trench talk
trench talk
chenjave and clowny
I got a lot of submissions this week
I've talked about Chase Young a lot
Again, I like Chase Young.
I think he's going to be really good.
I also think that along with the rest of that Washington D-line,
they should be commended for their effort, their intensity,
they're good football players, but the Eagles just fucking gave it up.
I mean, they just gave it up.
I was really interested to see, you know,
what Clowny looked like in that Tennessee uniform.
And what a way to start the year.
Because if you think about this,
if I had one word to describe this tape study, it's conditioning.
So that's my one word for Jadavian Clowny.
And it wasn't all bad, but the thing that stood out to me is how remarkable it is from a pure athleticism standpoint, he had one day in pads.
One day, hopped on a plane to Denver, of all places, in a game where you're playing in front of nobody, and you need the adrenaline, you need that extra charge, even if you're on the road.
and he hasn't played football really in a long time
and a lot of the time it showed
and I couldn't tell if it was baptism by fire for Vrabel
or he really knew how close the game would be
so he was like fuck it we got to trot him out there to play
47 plays
with one padded practice under his belt
that's 80% of the snaps
so I was both like
you know there was some negative
but there was a lot of positive and that's the starting point
with all that rust and no conditioning
he's going to help them a lot
lot this year. He played the first 11 snaps
of the game. The most
tired you will ever be as a
football player is the first drive of preseason.
Like a pickup hoops game.
Just like that.
It makes you feel
so helpless. They say fatigue makes
cowards of us all, I think about
that first snap in preseason.
Clowny got that first preseason
drive
in Denver of all places. At 10.20
at night. 20 run plays
26 past plays. He had two tackles, two assists, one hurry, one hit, two pressures. Here's the good.
As usual, very versatile, disruptive at times, and we know that. But he's best like freelancing
on tight ends and guards in the run game. I mean, for as big, strong and powerful and explosive
as he is, like he wants to jump around you. And that's not to say he's not physical. He just
knows that people lean and he can get people off balance. He does his best work chasing down plays,
He's crashing from the backside, unblocked,
you know, floating in the past game,
when I call somebody a floater,
we're talking about a D-Lyman who's floating around
in the second level and is obviously a big
and not a linebacker, although Jadavian Clowney does enough
that he's kind of a part-time linebacker.
Play one, if you look at it,
he jabs, swims the tight end,
and I call this the William Hayes technique
for the St. Louis fans back in the day.
That's when essentially you're lined up,
head up on a tight end,
he goes to engage you and you give him the oky-doke.
Your gap is the C gap, which is inside you,
but you say, hey, I'm going to backdoor this thing
and I'm going to make the play behind you.
And that's what Cheney and Clowny does a lot.
And this is vintage Clowny.
Play one, he does that.
Then he pressures a boot because he closes well.
Then the third play is TFL on a broken play.
Then you get the freelancer part that kind of burns the defense.
It appears he has the edge.
He clubs the tight end.
That's when you take an inside move on a tight end,
seven-yard gain. So there's going to be good with bad with Clowny. Once he settled in, he showed
some big flashes. The plays you'd want to see that you're like, okay, this guy is still this guy.
First and 10 on Tennessee 40, 3.39 to go. He's floating, as I explained earlier. And he comes
downhill on the center and just olays him. And you have to expect it. Usually it's counterintuitive
because you think of a big backer,
like a Dante High Tower.
He's coming downhill to hit you.
And these guards and centers
are looking at Javian Clowny
who looks like a fucking avatar, bro.
Like he's nine feet tall
and he's 280 pounds.
He's going to jump around you
and that's what he did.
He hits Lindsay in the back field for no gain.
You can't relax.
He changes speeds.
He changes levels.
Sometimes he plays with effort.
Sometimes he's hanging out,
which can be a real mind fuck
for an offensive lineman.
like sometimes as a player you think if I just go hard every time
that's the best thing to do sometimes you can lull people to sleep
once he settled in like I said big flashes
he does more damage reduced in a three
and by that I mean
uh down in a three technique over the guard
then on the edge as a rusher
you won't see clownie winning a bunch of edge rushes
um he's going to do his work inside
and you saw on a big third down
they walk the backer up essentially
and build a five-man front, and he's in a three technique.
And he takes 66 and pulls him outside and tosses him and takes the inside move.
It's a very upright move.
It's disruptive.
And Drewlock finds the window to get the first down.
But again, he's disruptive.
He's disruptive.
That's not going down as a sack, but he's very, very problematic for offenses
because you don't know where he's going to line up, and he does work everywhere.
You know, just the lack of effort sometimes was the bad on my end.
Not sure I saw him beat an edge guy,
but that's not really his calling card, as I said.
There was a really good Fant sequence for the Noah Fant fans
where he caught the brunt of the end of the sequence.
Fant caught a touchdown in the red zone.
We saw that first score if you stayed up late and watched the game.
He found the soft spot, came back, almost fell over,
but came back and caught a low ball from Drew for a touchdown.
The very next play,
Clowny gets lazy, shucking Fant
in the run game, the next possession,
and gets absolutely pile-drived.
If you wanna see that one,
I could tag it for you,
but I mean, it was the play after the first touchdown.
And he took him eight yards down the field
and dumped him on the back of his head.
So Fant, Fant likes to block too.
And Drew Locke wasn't quick getting the ball,
ball out. So I was kind of thinking maybe
these guys weren't getting home
because the ball was getting rifled out. Almost three
seconds. It's bottom five, week one.
So Clowney's everywhere.
It doesn't really get him into a rhythm
as a rusher because he
lines up all over the place. But he'll
help this team a lot. He'll
get in the shape and pair with Simmons to really
scare people up front. And
you've got to know where he is all the time.
And you got to remember he's like 26%
win rate as a rusher.
So that's nothing to scoff at.
He just isn't a, the ones he doesn't win, the 75% he doesn't win, he's like a home run or a strikeout guy.
You know what I mean?
Like he's going to get pushed out of the club, rushing the edge, and kind of, you know, fly by at nine or ten yards.
Or he's going to hit a home run.
He's not the guy who's going to bowl the tackle, collapse the pocket, you know, take an inside move.
So some good, some bad with Clowny.
But I think more than anything, a lot of positives when you consider this guy just got off the bus and had one padded practice before.
we went to Denver to play 47 plays.
What does a padded practice do for you, by the way?
How many would you want in?
Me, I would want six,
six to eight of them at the stage in, you know,
where I would be.
Just to feel comfy.
To feel, you know, because you never,
you got, now obviously the great ones
who are very athletic,
like a very gifted person like Jadavia and Clowney
will look like that.
And his floor is lower.
You know what I mean?
His floor is lower.
You could trot him out there.
He'll look tired.
He'll have some bad plays, but he's going to do that like clowny shit as well.
And it really doesn't matter.
I would say six to eight, it's a sweet spot right there.
Without further ado, let's get a real professional in here, huh?
I guess we're calling this the celebrity hotline.
It was going to be like celebrity panic meter when we call people whose football teams are doing really shitty.
But then John Hamm fell into our laps this week of John Burroughs fame, of St. Louis fame, of obviously
madmen fame.
and he's a chiefs fan, so he's feeling pretty good right now.
How long have you been a chiefs fan, John?
Probably right when the Rams left St. Louis.
That would probably be the inciting incident that turned me from a Rams fan to a Chiefs fan.
It's a lot like when the St. Louis Cardinals left for Arizona,
and I decided to not be a football Cardinals fan.
So it's funny how when a franchise leaves a city,
that it leaves a pretty terrible taste in your mouth.
Even if the franchise had turned into a dumpster fire,
like we were the past few years,
and I was going to ask you without dunking on me
and saying nothing's changed,
I was going to say,
what do fans in St. Louis do now when it comes to football?
I mean, like, where did the allegiances go?
I feel like some people went Chicago,
some people went west.
You know, I think some people are still holding on to the Rams.
I honestly held on to the,
Cardinals for a while. It was fun watching Warner when he had that run with them when they went to
the Super Bowl against the Steelers. But yeah, I mean, when a Chiefs team that's so dynamic and
good just appears, you know, a couple hundred miles west of you, then yeah. This was here all along.
Load me up on the bandwagon, man. I mean, you know, I mean, I'm not going to like sing the praises of
Len Dawson or anything, but I will. I will, I'm team home.
for sure, man. That dude's fun to watch.
And this new kid, Clyde Edward Hilaire is,
what a pickup, man.
For this defending chance to pick that guy up in the first round, wow.
He was also a big pickup from my fantasy squad, too.
I just want to put that out in the universe.
The winless fantasy squad.
Yeah, I'm O in one.
I'm O in one.
It's early.
Listen, it's early.
It's really early.
It's very early.
I feel like the first week of fantasy football is the hardest week,
because nobody knows anything.
And it's like you, you make all, you know,
you draft.
You get all the things.
Everybody thinks you're going to be great.
And then the first week is really the where it all, where the rubber hits the road.
Yeah, there was a bit of that with my team, the Liberty Cuckolds, which is named after, of course, Jerry Falwell's incident that's come to light in the past couple of weeks.
John, I don't know if you're familiar with the pool boy that services the Falwells.
Listen, hey, it's whatever you got to do.
It's a gig, right?
Yeah, it's a good gig, evidently.
Yeah, we left 33 points on the bench by way of Calvin Ridley in Atlanta.
I mean, so who'd you start over him, though?
He wouldn't know that, John.
He wouldn't know that if he had his machine open to the page.
I was very infamous last year because it was my first fall out of football,
and I never played fantasy as a ballplayer.
Like people always ask, like, do we do fantasy?
Some guys do, some guys don't.
But I was swimming to stay organized last fall, and I didn't even set my line up some days.
So that's kind of, I'm that guy in the league.
But I managed not to take home the last place finish, which involved getting dyed tips, blonde, like guy fear.
Oh, God.
Oh, wow.
You guys have, you guys have consequences.
Oh, yeah.
It's punitive.
What is it this year making?
The loser's going to get his own billboard on the major thoroughfare here in central Virginia.
Highway 40 style is right there.
Like right there out by, what's that delicious restaurant,
Annie Guns out there, way out.
There you go.
All right.
How about shout out Annie Guns?
And like, again, St. Louis roots here for John.
And John St.
St.ert.
It's the owner of Annie Guns.
He's a good dude.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I know a lot of those people.
They opened when I was still a waiter in St. Louis.
I used to wait tables at a place called Cardwells and Clayton,
which is no longer there.
Yeah, what's Cardwells now in Clayton?
Because I used to live like right across from the Ritz.
What?
What is it now? I don't even know if it's anything. I drove by it. Last time I was in town was for the All-Star game for the Blues.
Yeah. And it was wild. Like so much has changed. Yeah, like Clayton's changed so much and probably St. Louis has changed a lot since you've been gone.
For sure. I mean, I grew up, you know, I grew up on the north side. I grew up in Normandy.
And I went to school at Burroughs. Yeah, yeah. Shout out.
Yo, you got the hat on. Oh, yeah. And, you know, it was wild.
Like when I first started going to boroughs, the Interbelt didn't even exist.
Like, yeah.
Was that, is that the thing that wraps around Clayton?
No, it's the, it's the, it's Highway 170 now.
Yeah, 170.
Yeah, yeah.
It wasn't there.
My favorite dive bar is right off.
So like if you get out on the hill from Clayton, uh, and you're on Forsyth, you know
crew, I should just said Kruger.
Yeah, Kruger's, sure.
My favorite dive bar.
It's been there forever.
I love that place.
Yeah.
We used to go there after work.
Zeke Elliott is the other, well, Ellie Kemper.
and who you taught, and we've heard a lot of, you taught her in what, like drama class or something?
Yeah, she was a ninth grader in my drama class.
And I had her and we had Bo Willemann, who was a guy who ended up creating the series House of Cards,
who was also, he was a senior.
But yeah, we got those two and Zeke.
And we pump out some success stories at Burroughs.
I'll say that.
And you had Gus Ferrat as the head football coach.
recently. How about that, right?
We had a van Slyke there for a while.
Oh, yeah, you did have a van Sleck there.
The reason for the listeners, my wife, Meg, my lovely wife, Meg, as we say on this podcast,
was head lacrosse coach down there at Burroughs.
And I remember going down there and seeing Zeeke play and having no idea how good this kid could be.
I don't know if you ever saw him in high school.
I didn't see him in high school, but I remember somebody said he didn't lose a football game
at any level until he got to the NFL.
Must be nice.
Some of us didn't have that luxury.
I mean, that's how good he was.
And I mean, I can only imagine.
Just watching how good he was at OSU,
like thinking how that kid plays at like the 2A varsity level in Missouri football.
I was just like, this guy's a beast.
There's no way anybody's tackler.
I certainly, I played middle linebacker at Burroughs.
I was all state, but there was no way I'm tackling that kid.
So you're a middle linebacker?
Yeah.
Okay.
So if you get a chance to do that over,
and you could just morph into an all-pro NFL player today
because we know you love the NFL.
What position are you playing and what style of players, John?
I mean, I love playing linebacker.
I really did.
And I love playing defense.
I don't know if my body would be able to take it.
If I get to have your physique, then probably, yeah,
I'll keep middle linebacker.
But I'm kind of a rangy, rangy dude, like tall and lean.
So what are the, what are the medsie?
What's height and weight here? We think Hollywood, we think you're...
I'm 6-2-2-10.
That's a...
That's a dude.
That's a big dude.
Is it true that everybody has like...
Are people generally shorter and the head, like people's heads are bigger than you think?
I don't know, man.
I mean, I've always had...
I remember the first year I played football when I was in eighth grade.
They had to give me a varsity helmet because my head was so big.
There is, dude.
If you got a dome, you end up in Hollywood.
I don't know why it didn't work out for my dad.
I mean, two feature films,
Firestorm, Broken Arrow,
got kicked out of a train by Christian Slater,
and he wears a size eight hat.
Listen, I'm not crying tears for your dad.
He's doing just fine.
He's got a career in front of the camera.
He's got a good gig.
He's got a good gig.
You probably had one of your best sports years last year.
Is that fair to say?
Absolutely.
Was the Blues win?
I mean, you sound like you're more of an adopted
Westbound Chiefs fan
was the Blues
way far and away better than anything?
For sure. I mean,
the Blues was
after so many years
and I've got a lot of good friends on that
team and in the alumni
of almost and
disappointment and all
of the stuff that we had come to recognize
was part and parcel
with being a blues fan.
The fact that they just
really, every
every bad thing that happened to us didn't happen to us that year.
Right.
And it was the,
the greatest feeling of having the team that you feel like is the chosen team.
From Bennington to the fact that the hand pass thing happened.
And then we bounced back and obliterate the sharks who were kind of our,
our Achilles seal for so long.
And it was just everything went our way.
And,
and, you know,
the double over time against Dallas at home,
which I was there for.
Oh,
You got to that one.
I went to every game I could because I was all in, man.
I was just so into it.
And then when they won, I didn't get to go to Boston, so I didn't get to go to that.
I was actually shooting a commercial up in Vancouver.
So I flew from Vancouver.
We wrapped and I flew right to St. Louis to go to the team dinner.
Because Steiner and a bunch of the guys are buddies of mine.
And then we all got to go party with the cup.
And it was outstanding.
It was just outstanding.
That's a really fun.
group. I imagine any hockey team. Like, I've thought about this before the people who are most fun to
party with in sports. Like, I'll take hockey over football. I'll take hockey over basketball.
Anything, probably. Guys are quirky and they're like fun that way. But hockey players, I mean,
you've partied with athletes. They're probably to take the cake. Yeah. It's a, it's a good hang.
That's for sure, man. And, you know, they're all, they're all, they're all just young. Most of them are
young guys from, you know, the sticks out in Canada. So they're just, they're here to
have a good time, man. And I ran into a bunch of them. The reason I've known Steiner for a long time,
but the reason I met a bunch of the other guys was literally one night out in L.A. I had gone
to a Laker game and with a bunch of famous people. And those famous people decided to go out
afterwards. And I was like, well, I'll hang out. And we went to someplace. And I, and the table next to us,
there's a bunch of dudes and they're kind of looking over at me and staring at me.
I'm like, I'm not the most famous person here at all, but okay.
And finally one of them goes, hey man, are you John Hamm?
And I said, yeah, he goes, we're the blues.
Oh, shit.
They had just played a game that day.
They had a day game and they had the night off because they were traveling the next day.
And I was like, holy shit.
So good to meet you guys.
They're all chill, man.
They're humble.
That's the thing about like any mask sport.
There's, I think, a little bit more humility.
like big team sports with a lot of people on the teams.
Yeah, where you,
yeah, football players are aggressive to party with.
We all fundamentally have this axe.
We're continually grinding and like whether you grind that like on, you know,
12 bud lights or, you know, six shots of JMO or it's on the field.
Like hockey players are able to turn it on and off.
They don't have anything to prove off the ice,
which I like.
And probably a guy I know best on the team is Patty Maroon.
Oh, Matt is about a fucking caveman in the best way.
Like that's what the team was missing last year.
I was just talking to somebody about this the other day,
this past season actually, which was so weird,
was a Patty Maroon to me, like that skating by the opposing bench
and cussing them out and saying, like,
I was taught, you know, I'm still rooting for Patty.
They got a good shot to go to the final again at Tampa,
but I talk to him every now and again.
I've talked to him a few times in the bubble.
And he said the same thing.
You know, he said he and O'Rai were talking.
and there's just, you know, they miss that guy, that big front of the net presence and that big, like, bear that's just like the guy who's got your back and everything.
And, you know, who knows, it was such a weird year anyway.
Like, yeah, I feel like everything about almost all sports this year has a big old asterisk next to it.
Maybe it's hard this year because it kills the momentum a little bit.
Like, this is the toughest year to defend the title or maybe it's the opposite way in football.
Maybe the chiefs just roll because they don't, you didn't get all the parties, the parades, all the shit that would blow your head up.
You know, you really had to get away from the facility.
I wonder if in hockey it was like that killed that momentum that they built up.
For sure.
I mean, because you look at the blues, how they were playing before.
I actually went to the last game that they played because it was out here in Anaheim.
And I went and they just demolished the ducks.
I think they've won like 4-1 or 5-1 or something and they'd killed them.
And they were clicking on all cylinders.
And of course, you know, when this kind of thing happens, you're out of your, you know it better than anybody else.
You're out of your routine.
Yeah.
You can't go do your workout.
You can't, you know, for these guys, you can't skate.
Right.
You couldn't do anything.
And, you know, you look at a guy like Bennington who's sitting in his, in his apartment, like, what is he going to, you know, stop pucks that his dad throws at him?
Like, there's nothing to do.
Like, you can't play wallball.
You can't play wallball.
Like a lacrosse kid or something.
Exactly.
Like, it's just not happening.
So, you know, I felt for the guys because what a bummer to not be able to defend that title the way obviously you know they wanted to.
But, you know, they're professional athletes too.
They're going to shake it off and they'll be back strong.
They're a great team.
And they've got a lot of young talent that's just emerging.
So I think they're going to have a really good run.
And you were down there in the bowels of the stadium a lot.
I saw you post game hanging with your guys and that sort of thing.
Like you mentioned the chiefs.
Paul Rudd's probably the famous
Chiefs fan that's been like diehard
the longest maybe. Is that accurate?
Yeah, for sure. He's a
he's a KC guy. I mean, there's
no two ways around it.
You in the locker room with the Blues the first time,
Paul Rudd in the locker room with the Chiefs
the first time, who's the bigger fucking fan boy
in that setting?
Oh man, that's a good question.
I mean,
the reason it's a good question is because both of us,
neither one of us are like new to this.
Like, I've been a blues fan since the 70s.
Yeah.
Like, and I think Rudd's been a chiefs fan probably earlier than that.
So, you know, the greatest thing for me, though, I will say this.
Like, I was at the Super Bowl this year.
Paul was there with his son.
And to watch, like, those two, the emotions, those two went through through that game.
Yeah.
Was amazing.
And I got the greatest picture of Paul and his boy.
after the game, both crying, like weeping.
And they both got to go down on the field afterwards.
And it was pretty special.
It was pretty great.
I mean, when you have a friend, I've known Paul since I was a teenager.
And when you have a friend like that and you get to experience something like that,
it was pretty cool.
I mean, I had the same, I had kind of the same thing with the blues.
I had, my friend who called in the middle of this lives in Australia.
And I flew him back for, for the final.
for the home games, the three home games in St. Louis.
I was like, you've got to come back.
There's just no way you're going to miss this.
Like, we've been fans of this team forever.
Sports thread here.
I kind of wondered this thinking about like your role in Mad Men and Don Draper,
which I don't want to speak out of turn.
Was that kind of like a breakthrough the way you look at it for you?
Oh, yeah, for sure.
No doubt about it.
I'm always careful talking to actors and musicians because I could like assume the wrong thing.
but I figure that's your big break.
And I wonder, do you know, like, relatively quickly that this is it when you get that script
or when you start working on the role?
I knew that the script was good.
I knew that the project was going to be good.
But that rarely means that, or that doesn't necessarily translate into it being successful
or popular or anything.
I mean, you can, you can, I can point to a bunch of movies.
projects that I've done that were all very good, but then, you know, underperformed at the box
office or what have you. And so so much of it is out of your control. And then with Mad Men,
you know, there was a there was a huge question of like, well, who, who knows what AMC is?
Like every, for the first like year we did it, people, people in the press kept calling it A&E.
I was like, it's not on A&E, dude. It's AMC. It's a totally different network. But nobody knew.
And again, this is before breaking back.
and before you know before people now know what AMC is so we were kind of the first out of the
gate and it was very much a question as to whether or not anybody would see it at all
we were super fortunate and that we kind of came out right around the time when the iPhone came out
and kind of blog culture came out and then social media started so like we we debuted
I think in 2005 or six
and then like Twitter was
2007
Instagram was 2010
the iPhone came out in 2007
it was like it was just all of these things
that that enabled
people to communicate
in a way that they hadn't about
television and then also just the way
that people consume television
the whole binge culture and what have you
I mean when we came out people still bought
DVDs of stuff
like that doesn't happen buying DVDs anymore
I buy fucking Blu-rays left and right
I was just at Walmart, dude.
I mean, it's still a thing, but it's not like it was.
And you know, you look at the section in Walmart.
It's not as big.
It's just a big tub of like plastic.
Exactly.
And I feel sad about how old I am.
You know, like I'm just thinking about when you say 07, like about the time that came out,
we were in college.
Like that's when we switched to Facebook and we got off MySpace and shit like that.
Exactly, right?
You don't strike me as a Myspace.
No.
Friendster.
Were you a friendster guy?
No, none of the above.
Chris, I've watched you grind tape, watch the same play seven different times.
John, do you watch, are you a consumer of your own work?
I'm not one of those guys that like doesn't like to watch it, but I don't watch it in that way,
like in the way that you would watch tape to like figure out plays and figure out what you
did and didn't do right.
That kind of doesn't work that way.
But yeah, I mean, generally I've watched the stuff that I'm in because I like it.
Like, I, you know, there's a reason I pick certain projects and, you know, like you mentioned the town.
There's a perfect example.
If that thing comes on, I'll watch it.
Right.
It's good movie.
Right.
I'm proud of it.
You know, it was 10 years ago this year, by the way, that that came out.
Golly.
So.
Time flies.
Tell me about it.
But, you know, yeah, I like, I like me.
Yeah.
Well, this is that, that's, is that one of the hardest things that comment.
conquer because like I I don't assume that you're the only that that everybody likes them and I mean it's
even in podcasting like no I hate my fucking voice I mean maybe john you're sitting here and thinking like
man your voice sucks but like making hates his voice uh and learning about this the last two years is
like in the editing process and that sort of thing like especially if I edit after I smoke like I can't
stand myself like I just just paranoia and my poor producers are up at 1 a.m and I'm like do that
shit over. I hated that. Is that the case with everybody in Hollywood that they're like,
I like me? Uh, I mean, I think, I think there's like anything, there's, there's gradations,
you know, I think certain people get in their head about, you know, we all have had that
experience of like, when you listen to yourself played back, you're like, I don't sound like that.
That's just, that's just, you know, how the human voice works. But, uh, I'm so used to listening to
myself talk now that I've gotten over it. And I think most people that are either my age or have
had the length of career that I've had are in a pretty good space with that. So yeah, I mean,
there are definitely people that that'll never watch anything they do. And then there are
other people that want to, you know, watch it over and over and over again. As soon as the takes
over, they'll run back to Video Village and, and check it out. So I mean, like, I guess that's,
that's way cooler and more acceptable than bumping your own new rap album,
the windows down like Melrose or something.
Yeah, I don't exactly do it.
It's not like I play clips of my.
No, no, no, I don't, I didn't assume that.
I just, you know, like I wonder if on the flip side
of knowing that Mad Men is good at some point
or like some of the projects that you had really good hunches on.
Because I was thinking about this,
with this season, no preseason, teams are taking the field
and they're like, and I've been on a bunch of Rams teams
where I tried to talk myself out of thinking we're gonna suck.
You know, you don't know,
know until you take the field for preseason. And there was no preseason this year. Are there projects
where people are like talking kind of amongst themselves quietly and they're like, do we suck?
Like, is this bad? I'm sure there are. You know, I'm sure that there's people that are working on
stuff that are like, it is what it is. You know what I mean? Like I'm sure, like anything,
there's an X factor to it. Right. So like you never know that the kid coming out of,
whatever SEC school that's a high draft pick has got a wonky back or a tricky knee or something.
And then, you know, all of a sudden you're like, oh, well, I guess he wasn't that good.
Yeah.
Or he's not that good at this level.
You know, I mean, that happens at every level, I'm sure.
When you bump up from high school to college, when you bump up from D3 to D1, whatever it is.
And then it's time to play with the big boys.
It's a whole different world.
And I mean, I'm buddies with a couple guys that played.
in the NFL and they talk about it.
And I'm sure you've had the same experience where it's just like,
it's like going into light speed where everything happens so fast and you just,
you better get ready for it because it's faster than anything you've ever dealt with.
Yeah, my wife, Kate, lovely wife, Kate,
was recently watching morning TV and was legitimately uncomfortable by the way
your physical appearance was being objectified.
I guess this is a good problem to have.
Do you ever wish your acting pedigree, John, got more of the credit than your central casting, leading man face?
Well, I mean, that's, like you said, that's a pretty good problem to have, I guess.
And I've been fortunate enough to have, I say this a lot, but like credibility on kind of both sides of that table.
And when Mad Men, when Mad Men hit, like, they were kind of like, oh, this guy's good.
And then I was able to kind of pivot off of that.
and work on shows like 30 Rock and SNL and things like that.
And they were like, oh, you're, you're funny too.
Like, that's, that's a bonus.
Like, okay, cool.
So, you know, I've been, I've been so fortunate in my career, like, in many, many ways.
But, I mean, you know, I guess it comes to the territory.
The funniest role that, like, of all the great roles you've had,
I'm thinking about the ones in the one in was a bridesmaids.
Oh, God.
And that shit eating grin.
on your face.
Like,
I could just tell you
were having fun playing that guy.
Well,
Kristen Wigg,
who co-wrote that script with Annie Mollalo
is one of the funniest people on the planet for sure.
And when she,
when she asked me to be in that movie,
I was like,
oh,
100% yes.
Like,
absolutely.
And then I hadn't even read it.
And then she gave me the script and I was like,
oh, yeah,
I can make something out of this.
This will be fun.
That's so good.
that tiny ass Porsche.
Would you drive something like that in real life?
Do you have a Porsche in real life?
No, I'm the voice of Mercedes-Benz in North America.
Are you really?
Yeah.
If you listen to any golf tournament or tennis tournament,
you're going to get real support by voice real quick.
Damn, you got the Mercedes gig.
Yeah.
Yeah.
My guy, dude.
I've had it for, this is my 10th year.
I've had that, so it's not the worst to be able to drive a Mercedes-Benz.
I might get the Kia gig in a couple of years.
I'm thinking.
You've got to get some of your dad's sketchers money.
I know, dude.
Well, here's the problem.
He keeps just bringing home free shoes.
I'm like, no, no, no.
I want some cash.
Let's go back to the Chevrolet.
Yeah, let's go back to the Chevy.
Like, give me a truck.
Yeah.
I want the truck.
Yeah, he's definitely been,
the best was when I was in high school and I come home and I watch a commercial
and he's shooting a can of cores light at a rattlesnake,
a CGI rattle snake.
And I'm like, Dad.
I mean,
One time evidently Viagra came to him to do an ad
and I pleaded with him, please don't do it, dude.
Like wait till I'm out of the house
so I don't get the Viagra.
Exactly.
Like, just give me a fucking second.
With Hollywood, it's not like football, okay?
Like football, you have your big pop
and then you're probably downhill from there.
It's a young man's game.
Like Hollywood's a grind.
I know even you, with all the success you've had,
I read where you come to LA, you're like,
I'm 25, I need to do this in five years, right?
Yeah, for sure.
I think, you know, there is a certain time frame.
And it's just you've got to make your mark while you can.
And I remember coming out here.
I was 25 when I came out here.
And I felt like I was 50.
I mean, it was just, you know, and that was before the kind of now version of everything
where kids are famous at 16 for a TikTok or something.
You know, you're just like, I mean, I sound like my grandfather when I say things like that,
but it's true.
Like guys are like making millions of dollars on Twitch.
Yeah.
I guess.
Okay, cool.
Like, yeah.
I mean, also, I'm like, I'm not mad at it.
Like, that's what the, that's what the kids watch.
That's what the kids watch.
And I'm, I'm happy that I'm able to do what I do and kind of maintain a lifestyle and a, in a career doing it.
I don't think movies and TV, even nowadays, there's, there will always be movies and TV.
Right.
It's just now there's Twitch and there's TikTok and there's YouTube and there's, you know, fill in the blank.
Like, it's not for me, but.
But there was a grind there for you.
like there was definitely, if you went in a time machine, you'd be surprised at some of the odd
jobs that you had to do. Well, I just, I mostly always worked at restaurants. So I was,
it was just like, it was always, like I kind of loved it. I loved working in restaurants and I,
I, I love bartending. And that's how I met a lot of, a lot of cool people and a lot of good friends,
made a lot of good friends. And you make decent money, especially in LA, man. It was like,
I made good money, waiting tables. So that's interesting. That's got to be the most interesting
place to be a bartender in almost the entire country. I mean, it's got to be. You probably see
people stroll in depending on what bar you're working at. Well, I fortunately didn't work at like a real
industry kind of place. Like we were downtown LA before downtown became cool. Yeah, yeah. It was actually
before they even built the Staples Center. But we, yeah, I didn't really meet a lot of famous people.
I just, we just had like normal people coming through and spending a ton of money because it's LA.
What if I said the word softcore porn?
I did do that job once and I was not an actor.
I just figured that out yesterday because I'm like,
let me scroll through John Hamm's bio
to see if there's something I didn't catch at some point.
And I'm like, this is amazing because I have questions
about that whole process.
Well, it's not dissimilar to probably what you think.
It's just it was a kind of low budget.
Skinimax kind of, you know, one of those movies that comes on after midnight and has a lot of
like dissolves and, and, uh, it's like it got made on I movie or like a dog.
Oh man.
It's way before I movie.
This was way before I movie.
So what, this would be amazing if one of the, and you were a, what did, what was your job on set?
Because you weren't a performance.
I was a, I was what's called a set dresser.
So I had to like, if the camera wanted to be in the corner and there was furniture.
in the corner. I had to move the furniture out of the way. And then when the camera came,
moved again, I had to put it back. So you had to like, this is again, before smartphones or anything,
I had a polar road camera. So I'd take a picture of what everything looked like. And then when
the camera moved back, I would put everything back in the right position. That's what I did. And I just
made sure everything was in the right place. But you were like one of the unsung heroes that fueled like
much of my high school activities. So like you were one of the true heroes.
that like we used to have highlight tapes, VCRs, so we'd stay up late. This is in the VCR days.
And we would skip the fluff and, you know, do the, we'd hit record and then stop when they
started talking again. Right. Get right to me. Like, yeah. You can put it that way. But not really.
You couldn't put it that way in soft corp. I know you were on curb, which we really would love to ask
you about in a second. But it kind of reminded me of the professional crier scene in a weird way
because do you know the professional crier episode?
Yeah.
Yeah.
My favorite scene in the whole season maybe.
I know you were on it.
I haven't gotten to yours yet.
But when you meet like a girl and you hit it off and you think you've got some great chemistry and you find out then she's a soft core porn actress, she might have been acting this whole time.
Like that's a disturbing prospect.
Entirely true, but you could probably tell in the moment, I would imagine.
I would hope so.
They're not known for their subtlety, the folks that take those roles.
What about Larry David?
Is he just Larry David in real life?
Yeah, LD's great.
I mean, he is as advertised.
You know, I met Larry a long time ago and I've known him for, for hung out with him
on various, you know, functions and whatnot and play golf with him.
And he is that guy.
And it's, it's always entertaining.
You know, he's, he's, he's a great hang.
He's a, he's a good man.
He's a decent golf.
and and he's a funny guy.
I mean,
he has that kind of observational thing that he's constantly,
what are you going to do that?
Why are you doing that?
You know, what is that all about?
And it's just, there's no filter.
So it's, like I said, he's a, he's a great hang.
It's really hard to explain, and I guess you might have just taken a solid stab at it,
but like his what his stick is.
Like it's just so like subtle and perfect and organic.
It's just.
I think the amazing thing that Larry is able to somehow do.
And I think it speaks to his character as a human being because he is a really great guy.
Is that he can complain about things that normal people would be like,
why are you even?
What are you complaining?
Like you have all money in the world.
It sounds like my fucking co-host, dude.
Like, no, this is the 30, how old are you, 34?
That's right.
34-year-old version of Larry David here.
I mean, he complains about everything.
But he makes somehow he makes it relatable.
And I think that that's, that, you know, instead of it being annoying, it's, I mean,
it is annoying, but it's hilariously annoying here too.
But the problem is this isn't Larry David.
This is making Gunner.
So, you know, Larry David complains, it's like, yeah, this is, you've made a career.
I'll say what, making, you just need to, you just need to have that sound.
clip loaded up on your phone and every time you complain about something as soon as you finish just
hit the button and have the yeah yeah oh perfect such a brilliant show uh what have you been uh
watching during quarantine times binging anything um a lot of documentaries i watched you know
like everybody i watched the tiger king and then kind of immediately regretted that i did um a lot of
i mean what else am i watch um the lovecraft country that's that's pretty interesting
interesting. Yeah, man, it's like at least we have that.
Yeah.
In lockdown and quarantine, like thank God we have access to all of the movies and TV in the world.
Because that's been a saving grace. And then finally, like the other like I live kind of right near Griffith Park out here in LA.
So it's I've got at least I've got a big.
Kind of ready made exercise space.
I've seen people on Instagram getting out there still. I mean, it doesn't seem like it's overrunner.
or anything. You can still get a... No, it's not. I mean, it's a huge park. So you can, you know,
you're not going to really run into anybody. If anything, you're going to run into some wildlife.
I know that from Grand Theft Auto. That's the only time I've been in Griffith Park. I actually
hit a mountain lion, so that makes sense. Oh, wow. There you go. We do have a mountain lion in our
neighborhood. The coolest picture I've ever seen, you might have seen this was the Nat Geo picture
of this mountain line with the Hollywood sign in the background. It was, it's gorgeous. It is amazing.
There was one, there was a picture that somebody posted on something that was like that there, it's the name, the mountain line's name is P-22. He's got, he's tagged and chipped and everything and they know where he is at all times, but he was just cruising up Beachwood drive and he was just literally like somebody's ring camera caught him in front of their house. It's so sketchy in L.A. It just doesn't make sense to me. What about Top Gun, man? Top Gun's coming out now when?
Next June. So June 2021.
And it's awesome.
I mean, I finally got to see it in its entirety.
On a big screen at Paramount, you know, we had to sit in 10 feet apart.
But it was awesome.
Like, it was, it's exactly the movie that you want it to be.
Like, it's the perfect balance of, like, nostalgia for the first one.
And then the continuation of the story from the first one.
So it's all, you know, original.
But it's still got so much of that.
stuff that you loved about the first one.
And by the way, the aerial sequences are unbelievable.
I mean, they're, they're all practical.
They did.
There's very little CGI in it, if any.
And I mean, the stuff that these guys had to go through that were in the planes,
including Tom.
Yeah.
Is unreal.
I mean, you see it on their face.
You just, you know, you could see that, like, thing when you're pulling however many
jeez.
The face is just like, flatens out.
Miles and Eagles.
fan. Yeah, he's a Philly guy. We had him last summer and stayed in touch, but he was like,
Tom does a lot of his own stuff and it was, we were up in the planes and I went for a ride and
that sort of thing. Did you get to go for a ride and one of the, I didn't get to go, but,
because there's a whole like, there's a lot of paperwork involved. Oh, yeah. Like if you want to get
an $80 million aircraft owned by the taxpayers, there's quite a few releases that you have to sign.
But I didn't have to.
I would have liked to.
But the timing didn't work out.
And my character's basically more on the carrier and on the base.
So I didn't get a chance to do it.
But the guys that did, including all the young guys, including Miles,
I mean, they had to go through it.
It's a taxing thing to fly one of those things.
And it's impressive.
And, you know, hats off to the naval aviators and everybody that does that.
it is a real it's a it's a physical challenge what was the puke rate for the talent in those planes
significant right i think like yeah i think you're probably 100% oh 100 yeah they all i mean
it's it's it's real like it's yeah yeah i don't doubt it's it's it's they couldn't even
describe it they're just like it's literally like just being thrown into a washing machine like
it's bonkers are you a thrill seeker not so much anymore man i'm almost 50 like i like the
The thrills I get are like watching sports.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Speaking of.
Yeah.
25-ish years in St. Louis, do you prefer watching sports?
Central time, West Coast time.
West Coast, for sure.
That's a great question.
Games, I mean, games starting at 10, it's the best.
Sundays are the best out here.
Yeah, you know what sucks is the late games on the East Coast.
They always coincide with when your hangover turns into like anxiety.
You know what I mean?
Like the Sunday scaries, like they always.
coincide with some late game. And if you lived out west, you wouldn't have to deal with that.
That'd be nice. Well, and also, like, the late games started like, you know, the games don't
until midnight. Right. Dude. And you just up late, you know, it's like, I don't know, it'd be,
it's weird. The Denver game the other night, I'm nodding off watching football. It started at 1020.
1020. Yeah. I mean, it starts then. That's crazy. So, like, out here, that's what,
I had to watch that whole thing because of fantasy. And I, fortunately, uh, man, that's a
Well, who's on your squad before we like to do.
It wasn't the fact that anyone was on my team is the guy I was playing against had Derek Henry or somebody.
Was it, was it Tennessee?
Yeah, Tennessee Denver.
Tennessee Denver.
Yeah, Derek Henry.
And I was watching him, you know, pile up yardage and freaking out.
But I ended up winning.
What's the good for you?
One or no, it's hard as we mentioned.
What's, who's your best pick on your squad?
And can you reveal the name of your team?
I've got my, I've got several.
Oh, you're one of those.
Several teams.
Multiple teams.
Multiple team guy.
Did you hear that?
Thought Don Draper had some integrity.
That's funny.
That's really funny.
Don't meet your heroes.
Yeah.
Well, the one that I play with, you know, we have cousin Sal from Jimmy Kimmel has a league that
we got a bunch of folks in.
And my buddy that I went to Missou with is on that team.
So our team is called Missou BZoo.
BZoo-B-Zoo-B-Zoo-B-Zoo-B-Zoo.
So you're a Drew Locke fan then?
I thought he looked great.
Yeah, he did look pretty good.
I thought he looked really good, you know.
Poised.
He did a great job.
I think he's going to have a career.
Give us one.
I love him in Mizzou.
Give us an upset pick this Sunday or so give me your take of week two.
Before we get you out of here.
Appreciate the time one more time.
You can mindlessly answer if you prefer 75 and
sunny every day or four seasons
of weather in the Midwest?
I really like it out here.
I'll be honest.
He's an honest man.
A lot of people would do the Homer thing.
And in St. Louis,
I don't miss it.
I'll tell you what,
I don't miss summer in St. Louis.
No.
I can,
I can,
I can, like,
have horrible, like,
stress flashbacks to two a days in August
and 98 degree,
100% humidity.
And I don't miss that.
And I,
I could,
the same thing in winter when I remember
having to use a cigarette lighter on my key to melt the ice in the lock it's it was such a shock
to me moving out there because you think like Missouri middle of the country it's not like the south
it's not going to be that hot and then our facility is you know where it is in earth city and it's in
that bowl oh yeah the moisture just sits in there and then on top of that there was that radioactive
waste issue that did you hear about that whole thing oh yeah they buried like tons of
of like, they'd be actually a pretty good script.
It's, uh, it's, they made a, they made a documentary about it. I watched the documentary.
Watch me be like on the next Aaron Brockovich is one of these fucking people. I mean, like,
it's just so, it's disturbing what I learned about that, that pile of, of burning trash.
Oh, it's awful. Yeah. And it's, the good news is it's slowly leaking into the water.
Oh, that's good. Mississippi River's not that big.
It's, it'll be fine. Yeah, it'll be straight. I'm sure it'll be fine. It'll be straight. So how about one, one, one bowl
prediction for week two. All right, old prediction.
Lions over Packers.
I fucking love that because I picked them to win the North and they went out there and
pissed down their leg Sunday. That's great.
I think they're going to learn from that.
And I mean, Rogers is, seems to be a little upset that they chose a quarterback in the
first round and had something to prove.
Yeah.
But I think, I don't know. I think that line seems good.
Well, best of luck to Missou-Zoo-Zoo, there's three zoos, right?
Zzoo B Zubis do
Okay
Yeah
We'll work on it
I got you
John thanks for the time man
Buddy my pleasure
Thanks for having me
Of course
Yeah it's great to see again
And go blues man
You see behind us
Go blues
Yeah
Let's go go cards
Cards need to like
Whip it up too
Yeah they're doing baseball
And go John Burroughs bombers
Yeah shout out to the bombers
John Hamm
I appreciate the time brother
You got it
John Ham
Is a Chiefs fan
I come to find out
He's not panicking
at all. He's a Cardinals fan. He's a blues fan. He's got it pretty good in the sports world.
Anyways, what we're going to do here is we're going to kick off our casting couch.
We're going to kick off our casting couch segment here. It's not the type that you're thinking
of. Get your mind out of the gutter. We're going to be casting iconic football coaches in their
biopics. Nine coaches here. And me and Macon are going to take a stab at each of them.
we'll post them. You guys vote on who took this thing home. Okay. The coaches are Bill Belichick,
Sean Payton, Andy Reed, Sean McVeigh, Cliff Kingsbury, Jim Harbaugh, John Gruden, Jason Garrett,
and Pete Carroll. Yeah, how'd you come up with this list? Well, I picked the most famous
coaches coaching today. Okay. Anybody you saw left off that's troubling?
No, just the most famous coach is coaching today.
Okay, Jason Garrett, the...
Also, like, Jason Garrett's famous on the internet.
So, like, a lot of these social posts live on the internet.
All right, let's dive in, how you want to do this.
Let's start with Sean Payton, shall we?
Okay.
I'll tell you mine.
Her name's Vicki Lawrence.
What?
Yeah.
Vicky Lawrence.
She's from Mama's family.
Now, Mama's family was canceled around about the time you and I were born.
But if you do a Google search for Vicki Lawrence, you will see that she has the pursed mouth,
which is Sean Payton's calling card.
I mean, he's got those pursed lips, that mouth that is, how would you say, narrow?
Yeah, I don't know.
I'm not my mouth on Sean Payton.
You're right.
It kind of comes to a stop.
Now, who he really looks like is Kenny Chesney, but Kenny Chesney, greatest recording artist of our time, is not now.
Not a Thesbian.
And therefore not eligible for this discussion.
Vicki Lawrence from Mama's family is my pick.
And that is out of left field.
I'm going to go Christopher Waltz.
You're going to have to probably Google him.
Isn't that a Christoph, Christopher?
Is it a Christoph Waltz?
I believe so.
He's Austrian.
It's German.
Christoph.
Christoph Waltz.
Sorry, I'm going to go Christoph Waltz.
The guy from Inglorious Bastards.
I mean, he's just got that kind of like shit eating grin.
Like, I know something you don't know.
Yeah, that's fair.
And I'm very comfortable with.
I mean, he's showing me the picture of this lady.
Mama's family.
This poor lady who's not here to defend herself.
I think those are two pretty good picks.
You can expound upon Christoph Waltz if you want.
I mean, just look at him.
Yep.
I can see him just.
Nicely done.
I can just see him roaming the sidelines.
Jim Harbaugh
I'm really happy about my pick for Jim Harbaugh
I kind of am too and he's the one I struggled with the most
I really had to
I had to look deep
we shared that struggle
I'm gonna go Gary Senise
okay you know
okay I went your boy
Ty Burrell
Modern Family fame
Ooh
Yeah you you uh this will be competitive
compelling radio here. You look up mine, I'll look up yours. But I think Ty Borel has that, that, that square face.
Ty Borel does have a pretty square face. Two handsome guys, Harbaugh and Borel. Yeah, I mean, I can see
Borel and some khakis. Yeah, I get it. I just, it's Gary Seneas for me. I don't know,
he's just intense. He just got an intense face. He's never relaxing. Just Google image search
Gary Seneese
and he's just
he's not very relaxed and neither is Jim Harbaugh ever
fair ever
um
let's go Andy Reid
Andy Reid
I got a guy who just left us sadly
Wilford Brimley
Wilford Brimley
who's best known for pronouncing diabetes
diabetes diabetes
but also a famed actor
yes yes this is he's a
he's definitely
more of a supporting actor.
Yeah,
looks most like
Andy Reid
in the China Syndrome,
a 1979 film.
But had the,
had the mustache,
looks a lot like Andy Reed.
Wow.
I'm looking up China syndrome.
I guess you're just
kind of profiling him
because of the mustache.
Yep, that's right.
I'm going to go David Harbor.
David Harbor.
And I know it's an H-A-R-B-O-U-R,
I'm trying to think of what he's,
I don't know
I'm just by name
Stranger Things
Yeah I haven't watched that
Sheriff and Stranger Things
He was also in
He's been in 40 things
I'm trying to think of what you've actually seen
Let me let me pull it up here
Let's pull up his IMDB
Hellboy
No
Not into Hellboy are you
It's really hard with you
Because you don't really watch a lot of
Things that other people watch
Like you know
That's not true
what else was he in that you would have
oh gling gary glen ross but not a
he was in black mass which was the johnny debt movie
and i did not enjoy that movie
he was also in suicide squad uh the equalizer
yeah none of these for me i feel confident with my wilford
brimley pick i feel like david harbour might take the cake there let's move on to
cliff kingsbury we'll probably take each other's actor here it's just gosling
and I don't feel good about it.
I don't either.
I guess it's the closest, though.
Maybe we'll do seven and we'll cut him and McVeigh out.
Okay.
Touchdown worth of coaches.
Okay.
Because McVeigh, I really struggled with.
I'll make known that my McVeigh was Joel McHale from the soup.
Yeah, Joel McHale.
He does do other things, but I couldn't name him, but he was host with the soup.
Okay.
Let's keep him on there and we'll get back.
Well, let's get back to each other on that.
Joel McHale.
Let's go Jason Garrett.
Okay.
Don't take mine.
Damian Lewis.
Fuck you.
I mean, no brainer, bro.
They're separated at birth.
Damien Lewis, great actor, homeland, billions, 27 days older than John Ham.
A little research he did.
Is he 27 days older than John Hamm?
They're both about to turn 5'0.
Damian Lewis, who I didn't know until doing some research after Billions,
is English.
Yeah, he's English.
And he put on like,
I mean, he's supposed to live in Manhattan,
but it sounded kind of like a Chicago-y type accent.
I never know how they do that.
I know, I know.
But we don't do it as well, I don't think.
Very impressive.
Yeah, really impressive.
Damien Lewis.
It looks like Jason Garrett.
Let's go Pete Carroll.
I'm pretty sure I'm going to,
I got this one.
Okay.
Go ahead.
Michael Keaton.
Can you not see Michael Keaton chewing the shit out of some gum
and just leaning in and close talking you?
That's good.
Yeah, that's good.
I want more looks here and went Richard Geer.
Richard Gear looks like Pete Carroll?
Pete Carroll looks like Richard Gear?
By the way, I don't...
I love the way Pete Carroll looks.
I'd like to look like that.
You want to look like Pete Carroll?
Yeah.
Is that weird?
Is that a weird thing to say?
Well, because, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, maybe not at 34, but I just, I like his look.
You'd like to settle into a Pete Carroll look.
Yeah, it's wild.
It can be so windy up there at CenturyLink.
And he's got good flow, good lettuce, but it just barely moves.
Yeah, it doesn't move a lot.
He's got a good, good, I don't know, skin looks V-moisturized.
Seriously.
Shout out to Pete Carroll.
Yeah, I like gums.
Yeah, it exfoliates.
Okay, I got Michael Keaton, you guys.
I got Richard gear.
My backup was, I struggled there a bit.
My backup was Idriselba just because Idriselba can kind of act like he can do it all.
But I went safe and I went here.
Yeah, well, now you put the backup out there.
John Gruden, this is, I feel good about this one.
I've said that the last few picks.
I don't have one, so I'll go Idrisalba here.
I mean, Chucky isn't an actor.
Chuckie's a doll
You can put Chucky
I'm gonna go Jack Nicholson
A young Jack Nicholson
Oh I like that
I like that a lot
Kind of menacing
Yeah
I concede that one to you
That's good
That's good
That's good
How about
How about rounding it out
With the goat here
The hoodie
Bill Belichick
I've got Anne Ramsey
From
A film called
Throw Mama
From the Train
Starring Danny DeVito
and Billy Crystal.
What?
She was also in the Goonies.
I mean,
you...
Have you located her yet?
No, I know she has,
but I've never heard of this movie.
Throw a mama from the train?
No.
Oh, you should check it out.
Holy shit.
Don't you think so?
That's Bill Belichick.
Was Bill Belichick inspired by Anne Ramsey?
That's right.
That's exactly right.
I take this as a compliment.
Holy hellraisers.
Yeah, they got the same vibe going.
Oh,
she's got scissors through her head.
Yeah, she's been in some things.
But check out throw mama from the train.
Is it like a,
oh, that's, that's,
I'm disturbed.
I'm going to see,
Andrew,
you might have won that one.
Who you got?
Donald Sutherland.
Hmm.
Yeah, I mean,
I don't know why I think Donald Sutherland can pull it off.
That's a really tough one, isn't it?
Yeah, Belichick is.
And you nailed it.
Thank you.
Well, that's pretty much all of them.
So that should do it.
We have a pod coming up Monday again with all your week two action and reactions.
If the dogs don't win more than the favorites, week two, I'll eat this here hat.
You will?
Yeah.
Making my gain some weight by Monday.
We've also got a gambling show out today again, Greenlight Gambling with Stanford
Steve, so check that out as well, and we'll see you on Monday.
y'all take care y'all take care
