Green Light with Chris Long - Gardner Minshew! Competing With Trevor Lawrence, Throwing To Tim Tebow, River-Drinking & The Mullet. Big 12 Leftovers Draft. Olympics Ban.

Episode Date: July 23, 2021

(01:42) - Hello, Layup Line and Trevor Lawrence's Hometown. (14:36) - Olympics Ban. (20:30) - NBA Finals Recap. (31:30) - Chris and Macon Talk BIG 12 vs SEC. (55:30) - Gardner Minshew on Competition, Losing the Mullet, Tim Tebow, Playing for Mike Leach, Adjusting to the NFL, and 'Moonshine Minshew.' (1:33:51) - Chris and Dr. 'Facts' Talk Jacksonville and Trade Rumors. (1:37:57) - Chris, Macon and Dr. 'Facts' on Sport's Best and Worst Mascots. (1:49:10) - Good, Bad and Ugly. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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risk-free, $500 sports bet. Download the win-bet app, now or visit WynNNBET.com. Download, bet, win, and let's get after it. Terms and conditions apply must be 21 or older and present in state where win bet is available. Gambling problem, call 1-800-2707-1-17. How do you take your mindset into a very abnormal year? Yeah, well, I'll tell you this, man, in preparation for the competition. I haven't taken a shit in weeks. It's not an option for me. Number two is not an option.

I say that. Welcome to America's Most Miserable podcast. I'm your host, Chris Long. Macon, take it away. Worcester Mass. Hello. The thing about Massachusetts that confuses me, there's a lot of Worcesters,

there's a lot of Chester's, there's a lot of shires, there's a lot of Worcestershire sauce. It's like Little England, but their team name is the Patriots. So they, kill a bunch of redcoats. They impale them with the bayonet on the end

of their guns and then they name their little towns after places in England. Where you got your first ring, Chris? That's right. I'm forever indebted to you guys. You the fans, thank you for allowing me to spend a year in your

in Foxborough. There's a lot of burrows too. There you go. Worcester's located right in the middle of Massachusetts. It's considered the heart of the Commonwealth by virtue of its geography. Jay Giles went to school in Worcester, Mass. Jay Giles, how could you forget?

Angel is a centerfold. Never knew her. Angel is a centerfold. That's well done. Yeah, Worcester Shire Sauce Factory right downtown Worcester. Another fun fact, it's actually not. Please don't correct me online. Please, don't be that guy. Bob Cousie is from Worcester.

pretty easy to figure out when he was born and lived. Let me read you a few blurbs about Boghousie. Wife died of pneumonia. $50 apartment in Queens. A brother fought in World War I. Yeah, I got him pegged for like the 20s. Yeah, dude. He just lived in like one of the toughest times to be alive in,

in American history. Yeah, it's rough. And he managed to be, according to his wisdom, Wikipedia page, anti-racist. I feel like you got to go in the Celtics ring of honor just for that. Now, I've been your friend of many years, and I can tell at the moment, your mood might not be 10 out of 10. So I hesitate to say this, but as I sit here on Bob Coosie's Wiki page,

I see that he was born in Manhattan, New York. That's weird. Because it's weird because he grew up in, why is he on the Worcester? Wikipedia then. Might be one of those like Santa Monica Charlottesville things for you? Yeah. I mean, hold on a second. I also see that

his dad was the one who fought in World War I and that Bob Cousie's father's first wife was the one who died of pneumonia. Yeah, well, suffice to say his life was fucked up. Well, present tense. We have not yet lost Bob Coozy.

Oh, he's alive? 92 years old. Jesus. We should have Bob Cousy on the show so he can clear up some of these rumors. That would be terrific. I mean, because if you read his Wikipedia, if you read his Wikipedia page at a rush, you know,

anybody could probably come up with some of this stuff. Bob, Bob, it's Chris Long. Could you send me a voice memo clearing up some discrepancies on your wiki page, fella? Bob Coozy. Yeah. Statue of NBA legend Bob Coozy.

unveiled in Worcester. Okay. Warchester. Is that, wait, wait, wait, which, which town are we talking about now? We're talking about Worcester. Is Worcester Worcester? Yes. Really?

Yeah, I thought you were going to call me on that several minutes ago. But yes, it's pronounced Worcester. Spelled Warchester. That's interesting. I really don't care much. Another fact will get Bob Cusey to clear up. His father put down a $500. down payment on a $4,500 house.

Would you like to sell a $4,500 house? I think that was after the $50 apartment in Queens. Well, I don't have any issue with that deposit. I mean, would like to see, actually, that's a 10% deposit roughly. That's a big number. Are you talking down payment or was that like earned money? That was a $500 down payment, $500 down payment on a $4,500 home. And so he's still paying PMI on that, Bob Boy.

Oh, well, you know what? Holy Cross. That's in Worcester. Now we're getting somewhere. Bob Coosie went to Holy Cross. In fact, they retired his number. Carter'sville, Georgia. I want to say hi as well as to not infringe on your calling card here.

Hi, Cartersville, Georgia. Hello, Mayor Matt. Mayor Matt listens to the pod, friend of the program. ran into him on a podcast this week. Strangely enough, there were just a bunch of people on this podcast that went on. Let me find the name real quick. Lure After Hours.

I think I'm doing that correctly. It's a fan podcast for the Levitard show. There were like nine people on it. They were all very nice. In fact, one of the gentlemen makes those hats that you're wearing on your head. Oh, wow. Yeah.

Yeah. So shout out to Lou on the Lour podcast. That could be confusing. So big shout out to Cincinnati. Lou and a big shout out to Mayor Matt who popped up on my Zoom screen late in the pod. They had mayors. They had all types of people on this podcast. But Mayor Matt is from Cartersville, Georgia, which is the home of Trevor Lawrence.

So that's our first mayor that we know of. I think we could put a green pen on Carter'sville, Georgia, for sure. Our only request would be maybe like, I'm not saying he offered to do anything we need around Carter'sville, but there was that kind of, how can I help the energy? Because he is a big fan of the podcast and I would say like maybe just a greenlight day. Yeah, that's flattering as hell. Maybe a special use permit in the event there's a zoning ordinance that we do not agree with. Perhaps they're requiring some road frontage where there is none where we would like to build a dwelling or perhaps an accessory dwelling unit. I think mayors are the types of people who can push those

things through. And I think it wouldn't be unreasonable to just set aside two chairs in the city council meeting with name plates and they're for us. Yes. Perpetually. I think like that's the least you can do. Maybe a big key to the city. Key to the city. Maybe a, maybe a, big keys that can get into, you know, the Abercrombie and Fitch and the firehouse and the, the town pump. Like the key works everywhere. A master key. that's right what happens when you lose the key to the city are you too embarrassed to call the city you got to call locksmith you can't call the locksmith to fix the key to the city he needs special permission because that's an important key surprise you don't see more like APBs out for keys

of the city that are that are wayward if you can't do any of that just rename the town lawrenceville because Trevor Lawrence I like have you done something for Trevor Lawrence yet because I feel like for little athletes in Cartersville, they're looking at Trevor Lawrence. They're saying, my city doesn't do much for me if I become the number one pick in the NFL draft. Is there a parade? Have we renamed a park? Is there a statue? I know Macon doesn't like statues, but. Yeah, I think we got to stop with the idolatry of human beings because we're We're complicated. We're a lot more than just our best and our worst, of course.

But you can find anything in somebody's past. Let's at least let Trevor have a professional career. I mean, he's going 3 and 14 with the Jags every year. I don't know if that's even sandwich-worthy. Okay, I'll take the over this year. What do you want to bet? No, I too would take the over. I was just proud of myself for picking two numbers that added up to

17. It took me a second. Hey, layup line today. It is Slash's birthday, your today, our tomorrow, slash, obviously, guy with big hair who can shred a guitar, guns and roses. Action Bronson mentioned slash off the top, like the first bar in probably the best Action Bronson song out there, which is Easy Rider. He used to listen to that before games. So shout out to our friend Action Bronson who is yoked, dude. Maybe Action Bronson is your trainer, dude. Like, you've been looking to me to get you in shape. Action Bronson is the guy on Instagram right now that makes me feel guilty about myself because I'm not doing dick. And every day he's swinging around that Bulgarian bag. You know what those are, make. Right. Bag. He's swinging those

fucking bags around with a little muscle shirts and a weight belt. And he looks like one of those guys that pushes semi-trucks on ESPN at 3 in the morning. And I'm proud of him. I'm very proud of him. He's down some LBs. He looks awesome and he's making me feel like shit. So shout out to Action Bronson. We'll get him back on the pod soon.

Hey, Cowboy Reid, who is currently muddy, can attest that. Formally, I wash my arm. Oh, you washed your arm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. How did he get mud on his arm in the studio? It wasn't in the studio, making you can recount. The cowboy was walking his dog about 8 a.m.

In the humble world-class city of Charlottesville, Virginia. And he slipped and fell and got mud all over his purse, including the back of his head, and brought that mud, tracked that mud, if you will, into Studio J. So he had mud on the back of his head from a fall? How bad was this fall, Reed? Oh, it was not. It had someone got it on video,

they would have put it on Jerry of the day, for sure. What's the worst public fall you ever had, making. I fell up the stairs, which is difficult to do at the Greensboro Coliseum as about a 12-year-old holding like two drinks and a popcorn. And so I had to keep the two drinks upright, which I did. But that meant my face went into the steps at an ACC tournament at the Greensboro Coliseum. And like people did not hold back just because I was a kid. Like there was laughter for rows and rows and rows, maybe even sections. Oh, that's bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was really bad. No, I was like, I was like even in a like a brisk, like not quite a jog, but I was really getting up there at a nice clip and fell fell upward onto my face. Oh, every time I take off up some stadium steps to like kind of jog, walk to the bathroom, I think about just that outcome. I, um, one time took the handoff in a JV football game and fell flat on my face. It was the only handoff of my career. The other one actually was a 12-yard gain, and it was called back because William Taylor held somebody. Oh, wow.

Yeah, sorry to throw you into the bus there, William. Just had a kid. Congrats to William. Congrats to William. Come a long way from leading the league in yellow cards with me in 1998. We both had 64. Wow. Yeah, it was like a tie.

It was like McGuire and Sosa. I think it was about the same time that McGuire and Sosa were duking it out. Only we didn't need APEDs to do. bad shit like line the desks up and run across them and dive into all the pillows in the reading section in sixth grade. I brought up our muddy cowboy because he can attest that I knocked out 20 push-ups just before the recording of this podcast, not unlike what Action Bronson is is doing on IG. You did knock out 20 push-ups and very light breathing afterwards. That's right. Very even breathing. We're building work capacity is what we're doing. Good, good. We love, yeah,

get the VO2 max up. Right. I want to shout out Zach from Walmart and Polson. He had a bear's hat on his head and he was checking out. And I was looking for, I mean, fuck, what was I looking for? Whatever was on my list. Some unnecessary item was on my list. And I was looking for it.

And Zach shot out a pound and said, I love this show without any pretense as I'm walking by him in Walmart. And I thought that was an awesome way to say hello, including right down to the pound. and Zach, we appreciate you. Very much so. Okay, so housekeeping. The Olympics started.

Of course, the opening ceremonies have not occurred yet, which seems like a major design flaw, doesn't it? Yes. And the Olympics have had a hard time getting out of their own way this year. So not out of laziness, not out of disinterest in the target shooting event or the curling or any of these other awesome events that I'm so, glued to the TV to watch every four summers or five summers, Tokyo 2020 is the calling card

of this year's Olympics, interestingly enough, like as if we don't know it's 2021. The Olympics can't get out of their way. They can't get out of their own way. They keep stepping in it. And so therefore, we're not going to talk about the Olympics the rest of the summer. We're putting the Olympics to bed. We're boycotting the Olympics. There's so many reasons to boycott the Olympics.

and for that reason, you won't be coming here for Olympic content. 42 condoms per athlete were issued at the 2016 games. That's right. And in the 2020, 2020, 2021 Olympics, you're telling me that I'm to take them home as souvenirs? Yeah, they told people, take your condoms home as souvenirs this year, which not to mention, it's 150,000 condoms. What are we supposed to do with 150,000 condoms? In 2016, in Rio, 42 condoms per athlete, okay?

Like 150K, I'm no mathematician, but that's around like seven sexes a day for these people. How are they supposed to get by bump and ugly seven times a day? These are elite athletes. They got their Fitbits. They need to know how many calories they've burnt. They need to move the lactic acid around. And it's all about camaraderie. when you're in one of those Olympic villages.

So I don't understand what they're doing. You got the cardboard beds. I know it's for the environment. Okay, plus one. It's not enough to get you uncanceled. You guys are really fucking it up. Don't use these condoms inside the bubble. We're giving you 150,000 condoms.

And we're going to say, don't use them inside the bubble. Where do you think these people are going to fuck? At home? Okay. Like that's literally why you get to the Olympics to have sex. Like that's why you go to the Olympics. And I just don't get it. Really what they're doing is creating a big pile of rubber.

So, you know, plus one for the cardboard beds, but you're wasting a ton of rubber, which is going to end up in some shark's mouth. It's going to wash up on the beach. So I'm totally over the Olympics. Take the condoms home as souvenirs. What am I supposed to do? Make a balloon animal with my condo?

them. Like seriously, guys, if you're listening to the Olympics, what we're going to have is a bunch of Olympics babies. You know how they call them like, what do they call when there's a surge in babies? Like a pandemic baby, there's a bunch of COVID babies. There's, you know, other occasions that create like some wave of infants. We're going to have a bunch of Tokyo babies. Okay. So what you're doing is irresponsible. Oh, and I haven't even gotten into the fact that COVID has qualified for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics in a big way. Yes, 2020 because they can't even get the fucking slogan right. Tokyo's 2,000 new cases are the highest since January 15th there. That is, of course, on par with the daily average in Katie, Texas. 75 people with Olympic credentials have tested

positive for COVID. The ship is sinking, guys, jump off it. It's the last time we're going to talk about it, this segment. Are you saying you're pulling out of the Olympics? I'm pulling out of the Olympics, yes. These guys have ruined the only thing on TV. They're telling a Paralympic athlete who's blind and deaf that she can't bring her assistant to the games. Like, what are we doing? You're not letting people smoke weed because you think it makes them faster. Like you got off to a terrible start.

Then you tell a woman that she can't bring her tiny 11-month-old baby. I mean, the things like, it's like tiny. It's like a tiny baby. 11 months old? You hold an 11 month old in your hand. That baby needs milk, okay? This woman can't breastfeed her baby on site. The Olympics is fucking this thing up.

From a public image standpoint, the whole thing. Norway's beach handball team fine for not wearing bikini bottoms. Well, if this is the last segment, let's give the folks a metal tracker. Currently, no events have been decided. There are no overall metal leaders. And that's the way it's going to be for the next four to six weeks on this podcast. Don't they take like two weeks? I don't know how long the Olympics is, but it's not going to matter.

I'm not going to find out this summer. We deserve like some system where if something big enough happens over the next four to six, two weeks, however long this fucking thing goes, we get like three mulligans a piece to talk about the Olympics. Because you never know. Somebody could stab themselves in the mid-sumptoms. section with a javelin, you know, like, the shit happens. Dog, table tennis is in the mix, so anything could happen. Yeah, so maybe we'll talk about the Olympics a little bit, but the Olympics are largely

going to go undiscussed on this podcast. They probably won't let us in the Olympics now because we're boycotting it. They're going to blackball us. Canoe? Canoe is an event? Damn, they got river events. Yeah, we and Nate talked about this. Damn.

Kind of coming around a little bit, huh? And I know you like Taekwondo. I love Taekwondo. I just started doing Jiu-Jitsu. You want to talk about the finals? Like there was a champion crown this week in sports. That happened. Janus Antecumbo.

How long can they drag an NBA championship out on first take? Oh, golly. Well. We're undisputed. How long can Skip Bayless argue about Janus? through the Olympics? Are they going to be able to carry this thing through the Olympics?

Well, we've talked about LeBron v. Michael Jordan for what, the last 20 years? So I think it's going to have a long runway. But Janice, speaking of that very conversation, is worthy of being discussed among the all-time greats now

with that 50 spot in a game deciding, in a series deciding game six. Seventh NBA player to score 50 or more in a finals game. He was excellent. Joins brothers Costas from 10 months ago winning a chip and

the nasis from that very same night as an NBA champ. Yeah, those two becoming champs stuck under my radar and obviously Janus didn't. The three of them, all with rings. Also want to take this time to mention our friend Mamidi Di Aquite

who now has three rings as well. G League most importantly obviously NBA and the Wahoos the Wahoos magical run He's got a high school state title as well to his name damn he's got four rings dude yeah it's pretty impressive You know what to do you know what to do Momity is from Guinea Guinea Guinea has pulled out of the 2020 Tokyo Olympics I knew we weren't going back but I just had to had to mention that like you

the country of Guinea has pulled out of the 2020 Olympics due to COVID concerns. So Janus, I think, has made one of the biggest 180s in like athlete history. I mean, I think there's a lot of prisoner at the moment situations going on on the internet right now, talking legacy and that sort of thing. I think the 50 piece and decisive game is legendary on some level, right? I think multiple MVP's, the speed with which he's accomplished all this different stuff is incredible. Let's wait a month to do like the legacy stuff. But what I will say is that from a court of public opinion standpoint,

I think Janice as an athlete has changed the minds of cynics within like the shortest span of all time. I mean, if you're talking about a guy who was internet fodder, like people were making fun of this cat on some. level, even though he's a top five player in the NBA and an MVP, people were busting his balls. Like, that was kind of the thing to do was to tease Janus. I know some people who have newly placed Janus's balls in their squarely in their mouth because they want to look cool online would probably deny that they used to do this. We all used to get jokes off on Janus. And the funny thing about getting jokes off on Janus and saying, we used to do it, it was like two weeks ago. Like, people were making a lot of fun of Janus because he said,

Katie was the best player in the world. Like, that was an uncool thing to do. Like, people were roasting him for being an uncool superstar. Not cynical enough. Not, you know, he, he doesn't want to talk bad about his opponents. Oh, God, that ran about humility. You know, all my, the corneous sports writers and blue checks were all over it. Well, that's no reason not to like him.

I think he's awesome. And I still don't think he can cross. anybody up. I still don't think he can hit a fade away with any predictability. I don't think he's got like a toolbox of moves, but it might be on the way. And when it is, maybe we'll be talking about legacy because one ring puts you in the conversation, especially coupled with all his accomplishments. But if he can get a chance to improve his game on the offensive end of the court and they grow as a team, he grows as a player, he stayed home. Like everything about this kid is likable. It just took a while for people to catch up to it and let their guard down and

say, it's okay to like the guy that's not a total asshole. I mean, Katie almost hit a three that ended that series. I mean, his foot was on the inch line. People were hurt this year. I'm not saying it's not a real ring, but you know how people are going to do. The tide is going to change again in two years to dudes with like frog AVI's saying win a real ring in his replies. Like, you know how this thing goes. So I don't want to get too, like, caught up in the moment. But I will say it's incredibly refreshing to see the tide turn on a kid so quickly. Good for him. Played through an injury.

Scored the basketball, made awesome clutch plays, the block, you know, the steel that Drew Holiday had that ended in that dunk with, of course, the famous chest bump of Mamadidhi Dukita. He had the signature moments. He had the grit. He had the sound bites. And the sound bites keep rolling in. And this guy is good for the game, and I'm glad people are coming around to liking him because he has been likable the whole time. It's just that we get so caught up and wanted to look cool. And there are cooler, quote-unquote, players in the NBA than Yon-Ukina.

The coolest part for me was 17 of 19 from the free throw line in game six when he couldn't make a free throw the entire series. It had become a thing throughout the playoffs to count as 10 as fast as you can in opposing arenas to get into this guy's head. and instead of being in his own head, he figured it out. 17 of 19 from the line. If he doesn't do that, we're talking about a game seven in Phoenix tomorrow night. So be impressive all the way around. Very impressive. He's shooting free throws evidently as we speak on the parade route up there in Milwaukee.

Nice. Nice time for a parade. Like honestly, in the NBA, if you think about like. Yonnesly. Yonestly. Yonestly, it's a nice. it's a really nice time to have a parade. Like I've training camped up there in that region in, you know,

the dead of August in late July. And it was temperate. It was chilly at night. You had a hoodie on. It's a good temperature to get drunk in, you know, dry air. It's probably a high of like 79 today, wherever they are on that parade route. 74 degrees at present high of 78. Perfect drinking weather.

I don't know if you're catching my drift here, but I feel like the shift just happens so fast. I think he's so marketable and he needed to win for people to fully buy in, which is the silliest thing in the world because of what I said about the KD3, about the injuries, like it's a real ring, but there are so many variables. What if KD hits that three has nothing to do with anything Janus is done or not done, right? The whole thing changes.

So for him to win a championship, yes, it's awesome. It solidifies him. But he's the same player he was, a month ago, same guy he was a month ago. He just had an opportunity to step up in a big moment in the finals and did. And so that's the way this works. I mean, the ring is going to take a lot of heat off him and now he can kind of be himself. And we can appreciate him for being himself.

Like him ordering 50 fucking wings or whatever it was a Chick-fil-A was gold. Like most players do that stuff and you're like, yo, this is so rehearsed, bro. Like you're trying too hard. You know what I mean? it's obvious that you're not being yourself. Janus in that car just reminded me of a kid that's happy to be here. The same kid that when he saw his first corn dog, he freaked out and posted on the internet.

The same kid that when he had Kool-Aid for the first time, had to take a picture and post it on Twitter or whatever it was. Like, it's not even how you use the app. He's just so pure, so happy, so joyful, seems like a great kid. He even asked the girl at Chick-fil-A if it was okay to put her on Instagram, live. That to me was like the biggest man, the NBA is in good hands if this guy is a star, right? If we're finally accepting him as NBA elite, not like the guy that's not supposed to be

here because we can make fun of the fact that he doesn't have moves or he lost, you know, this series or that series. He stayed home. He's cool. He won a large drink with no ice, which was weird. I guess maybe he's a germaphobe or it's a Europe thing because they don't have ice over there. And I think he's a lot of ice over there. And I think he's a lot of. He's a lot of he's the most likable superstar in the NBA now. I mean, I'm not overreacting. I don't want to do a legacy talk on the court, but I do think he's the most likable superstar in the NBA at this point.

Yeah, and maybe it's a lack of a rival, but I just, I can envision the person who's not happy specifically because Janus now has a ring. Maybe it's the hot-take person. But, yeah, it's, yeah, he's awesome. He's awesome. I was rooting for the, I was rooting for the sons, man. And by the end of the series, I was totally passive watching Game 6.

I wasn't even rooting for the Suns anymore. You know, like when you, there are modes of rooting for a team, like, you're really into it or you're rooting against that team. But then, like, in certain situations, you just sit back and watch the game. And for somebody who, like, really wanted Chris Paul to get a ring by game six with the Middleton stuff, with the Yonness stuff, with the Drew Holiday feature I saw, it was like, this team. Pat Connaton, guys definitely from, like, Massachusetts. I wonder what Shire he's from. Yeah, there's a lot to like about that team, and I'm happy for him. It feels north of...

Arlington, Massachusetts. Where is he from? Arlington, Massachusetts. Wow. Unbelievable. Couldn't be from anywhere else. Could not be from anywhere else. I think probably north of the Raptors championship as far as, like, win a real ring.

Yeah? Man, I think this is totally real. I mean, 10 fewer games in the regular season, and because of the bubble, some stars got hurt, but this is totally real to me. Now, it's not to say a decade from now, if he's sitting on one ring, you're not going to have the hot take artists on Monday through Friday morning saying, yeah, but he hasn't gone through a real squad yet. Okay, this is 100% real to me. I agree, it's real. And I would say they're both real, the Raptors in this championship. I just think the Raptors, their specific series was clearly affected by injuries,

like that series that they had to win to win the whole thing. You know, you have KD go down. You have Clay Thompson go down. And I remember in that series, that championship to me was three quarters as real as this one. This one's absolutely real. I'm with you. So good for the bucks. In other news, the SEC is bursting at the seams.

Yeah, so the news this week is that Texas and Oklahoma have hollered at the SEC about becoming teams 15 and 16 in that particular league. UT has just said speculation swirls around college athletics. We will not address rumors or speculation. Oklahoma has said the college athletics landscape is shifting constantly. We don't address every anonymous rumor. And then at SEC Media Days, Commissioner Greg Sanky declined comment, which tells me this is actually a thing. This is a real thing.

This is coming down the pike. Oh, there are so many white dudes in suits and boardrooms right now. It's southern accents just mumbling at each other. Like, I don't, there's so much going on. I'm hearing Oklahoma and Texas can get,

you know, can go to the SEC and it could happen within the next two weeks. Like, I didn't even know you could do it that fast. Like, what, where is it going? Houston Chronicle broke the news.

You know, uh, Greg Sankey has no, comment. You know, the issues here, Texas know you have to clear a little, you know, do some hurtling. We're not talking Olympics. No Tokyo. They got to do some hurtling. SEC bylaws, they say, and of course, SEC bylaws are kind of like, well, you know, our bylaws are one thing, but there are some unwritten rules. You know, like 75% of the conference must be in favor of any school joining. But allegedly, unanimous support is really what's needed within the SEC, within the

Southeastern conference for two schools like this to be approved into the SEC. Texas A&M, AD says he wants them to be the only Texas school in the SEC. So he's throwing a fit. That's like one of the biggest, like as if anybody cares in the world. Like who's actually listening to you, dude? Like no one cares what Texas A&M thinks. No offense. I mean, no one cares what Virginia thinks, but certainly in the SEC, you just got here. And like, yeah, it's been, you've done some cool things, like have Johnny Mansell on your team, but it's not like you've been running the SEC or that the SEC really needs you. We call this NIMBYism, Chris. Are you familiar with the term? I am not. NIMBY, not in my backyard.

Nice. Is that like a real estate term? Yeah, it can be. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Nimbieism. There's There's a lot of heavy nimbism going on for Texas A&M to actually request to be the only school in Texas in the SEC. And then there's a TV rights thing. You know, the Big 12 rights run through 2025. And there's a Longhorn Network deal that runs through 31. So ESPN could probably work out a side deal and make this right. The SEC on ESPN is starting in 2024. that's going to be a big deal. And ESPN probably have to work with the Longhorn Network to get

the squared away. Big 12 probably won't want it to happen at all, obviously. They don't want to lose their great teams. Their most celebrated teams, even though Texas hasn't done shit, we're always celebrating Texas. We're always paying attention to Texas. Every SEC school is going to want more money as a result of this. And ESPN is already paying the SEC $300 million a year. So it's a shit show. you know how it's going to end. If you're talking about this, it's going to happen. Am I wrong? No, smoke, fire. It sounds like this happens. When I first heard about it, I thought, yeah, like the A&M guy said, I bet they want to be in the SEC. But no, declining common and that sort of thing. That's code for this is going to happen. Yeah. Yeah. When a white guy with a southern accent in a suit in a board room declines comment,

that means your favorite college football team is on the move, dude. And I'm just telling you, this has been a thing for a while, the landscape of college football is never going to look the same. It just isn't because one of your Power 5 conferences is now being reduced to scrap metal. And that's the, that's the Big 12, which, you know, of course, lost a few teams a few years ago. And it didn't quite cripple them per se. These two leaving would absolutely wreck the Big 12, in my opinion. I mean, look at the teams that would be left. Oklahoma State, which, by the way, politicians in Oklahoma have said that Oklahoma State,

I don't know what the Oklahoma accent is. Oklahoma State and Oklahoma are a package deal. Well, I don't know that Oklahoma and the SEC feels that way about that. Yeah, no kidding. It's like when we petitioned essentially the ACC to let the Hokies in, boy, was that silly. I mean, for the greater good of the Commonwealth, of course. Those folks, those hokeys belong back in the Metro conference. The Big East.

I do miss the Big East, honestly. I mean, I really do. Even in football, I thought it was cool. Yeah, we got Oklahoma State. We have West Virginia. We have Iowa State. We have Kansas. We have Baylor.

We have T.C. We have Texas Tech and Kansas State. Like, that's just not enough to grab my attention on a Saturday, especially because, you know, there's no defense. You know, these teams aren't that good. and I've got a lot of other games to watch on TV. Like these are sharing time slots with, you know, SEC, middle of day games.

You might have Clemson on. You got some ACC schools. You got your Virginia Cavaliers. I'm not watching Kansas, Kansas State, like, at all, dude. I don't care what you call the rivalry. I'm not watching it. I'm not watching. Well, I might watch Iowa State, West Virginia.

But outside of that, there's not a lot of awesome games, TCU, but I'm not. interested in Texas Tech. I don't care how good they appear year to year. Baylor, not doing it for me. So what say you? What do you think happens to the Big 12? Well, it goes away. I thought what I haven't heard it. I don't know if he was joking or not, but Mike Leach said, hey, forget 12 team playoff. Let's go to 64 teams. Now, before you laugh it off, what if there are four 16 teams super conferences and we have a 64 team six game tournament after a six or eight game

regular season. Hard to wrap your mind around. I get it. But I think that's not the way it's headed in terms of a tournament, but certainly the way it's headed in terms of super conferences. It still is very odd to see Missouri and A&M and the SEC just says it's strange to see all these biggies teams in the ACC. So, yeah, I think we go ahead and get this done. And with the Big 12, sell off the parts to other conferences. Yeah, and if we had four major conferences that consist of like 16 teams of pop,

that leaves how many, like 50-something remaining floaters? Yeah, they're about. And then what do you do with the floaters? As the playoffs expand, it looks like logistically. possible that you could have four automatic bids for conference champions and then four at large slash like, you know, two could come from some of these other conferences. You'd have to be really exceptional to play on one of these other conferences and get a shot at it. But the Boise States of the world, if there's a Chris Peterson type situation, I don't know, some weird school

out there out west could make it. You know, maybe Holy Cross. the home of Bob Coosie, we slide them in. I don't know how this works, but I'm not going to freak out. I think people who are freaking out right now don't realize that it's already over as far as college football the way you knew it. I mean, Maryland's in the Big Ten. You've got again, you have like when tech and Miami came to the ACC, things started to change forever in college football in the Power Five conferences. So who knows what happens? I was thinking we draft the remaining scrap metal in the, uh,

in the big 12. And we're just drafting from a standpoint of who's going to come in last. Because as this conference gets picked apart, somebody's going to be left behind at the bus stop, so to speak. Drafts are my favorite thing. You don't have to twist my arm. Are we talking football only or are we doing school at large? We're just talking about school at large, man.

School at large. The vibe of that school, is it a commodity? Love it. You know, let's play white guys in. suits in a board room. Sick. Okay. To determine who gets the number one pick,

can you get within 500,000 of the population of Montana? Oh, absolutely. 2.5 million. Population is 1.069 million. I thought it was 2 million. Damn, there's not many people in Montana are there. Nope. Nope.

That's why I love it so much, dude. You might have been combining Idaho and Montana. You would have been, you would have been, right there. So I go first is what that means. Okay, with the first overall pick in the Big 12 spare parts draft,

I'm selecting West by God Virginia. Fuck! Really nice. Awesome. Okay. So competent squads, they've got the Mountaineer fellow who shoots a musket or a rifle or a gun of some sort, passionate

fan base, underrated, logo. I'm very proud to add West Virginia to my whatever conference. I don't know if you know this about me, but if I could have gone anywhere else in college football and spent four years, that's in my top three. Like after the fact or when you were 18 years old? When I was 18 years old, fucking the John Denver thing just blows me away every time, you know, even though the song was actually written about Virginia and it just made more sense for John phonetically, I think, to add the extra syllable, Shenandoah River and the whole thing. I know it's in West Virginia too, but it's mostly in Virginia.

I love everything they have going on there. I love their mascot. They also have 19 of their 20 national titles. Do you know what sport? No. You said it a moment ago. Rifle team. Damn.

Yeah. So this place, like I don't know if they shoot traditional muskets, like, or it takes 20 minutes to load those motherfuckers, just like their mascot. But pretty impressive. 20 national titles is more than I thought. Read the fine print. It's rifle.

But yeah, number one, they would have been my number one pick as well. All right. Well, hit us with your actual number one, number two overall. This sucks, man. I'm placing a big emphasis on football here. Okay.

I know they only have four national titles. as a school. So this is a little bit out of left field. And maybe I'm overlooking the basketball thing. I just think Kansas football is perpetually in the doghouse. You know, they literally were doing SEC mafia shit to keep that program running. Like you can't do what Les Miles did in Lawrence.

And doing that in Lawrence just shows how desperate they are, that they had to cheat and pay off dudes that narc the drug dealer, you know, 50K to go home. like that's these are desperation moves and I think it speaks to how bad the football program is. I'm going to go with TCU. Let me snag one of these Texas schools, the one that I think has the best football ceiling. I know Baylor has had some really, really good runs. I just feel like TCU is more marketable.

I know nothing about the school. I know nothing about the place. I just have a really negative connotation with Baylor. No, no Googling here. Amon G. Carter Stadium at TCU. I've been there. It's actually lovely. I love the horn frog thing. I love they hold up their hands with the little frog symbol,

which looks nothing like a frog. Like they're doing the best they can, but you can't make a frog with your hands. I still love it. I love the effort. You fly into Dallas, Fort Worth. Everybody's got a pool standing up out of the ground. All right, TCU.

You talked a lot about my second. pick. Three words for you. Dr. James Naismith. Sure, Kansas may cheat like crazy, but if I can add Fog Allen Fieldhouse

to my conference, I'm doing it. The Jayhawk. How unique. Lovely mascot. As you said, they'll do whatever it takes to have a come up

in football. May I remind you of Todd Reasing? Is that his name? Don't know. I heard him. Barely know her. Todd, I believe quarterback the Jayhawks and an Orange Bowl back in the Manjino years. Yeah, when they were in the Orange Bowl against Maryland of all schools. I think they played Maryland.

I think they beat Tech. I think they beat Tech in the Orange. 2008 Orange Bowl. The Jayhawks were 12 and 1. They did beat Virginia Tech 24 to 21. Was Todd Reesing the quarterback? He was the quarterback. Man, I still got it. Jay Hawks. the Orange Bowl one year. I forget who they played. This was when we were in damn near high school. This was the E.J. Henderson years. Like Bruce Perry. Yeah. What, who did they play in that Orange Bowl cowboy? All right. So you got the Kansas Jayhawks number two. Yep. I'm going to go with the Pokes number two. They're not going to the SEC. Nobody wants you at the dance with Oklahoma. It's, you know, these guys got 52 national titles. I just feel like it's Stillwater. The chance of you getting beat up in a bar and still water are

pretty high. And I know nothing about the town other than people in Norman just absolutely trash it. And they paint Norman as this picturesque like Eden of a place, which is all relative because it's Oklahoma. Oklahoma is just full of giant rattlesnakes and tumbleweeds and love gas stations. Brian, Big Country Reeves. Yep. And I guess my chances of getting beat up in a bar and Stillwater just went up. But like, I'm not going to Stillwater. So it's all good. Matt Damon movie. Did I just pick Oklahoma State and then just absolutely shit on the city? Yeah. I know nothing about your city.

I'm sorry if we have somebody in Stillwater, but I'm taking OSU, too. And my condition would be that they fix their uniforms because you've got orange and black. You've got cowboys. You've got everything you need. Can we go back to grass on that stadium? I don't know how you keep grass in Oklahoma. and can we fix those uniforms? Wyoming is just jolly stomping you

in the uniform department and they're cowboys and they're holding that title. You're going to let somebody sponsor by New Balance five years ago outdo you in the cowboy bracket of the uniform sweet stakes. I think not. That's my only condition. Okay.

I don't know if I share that opinion about the football unies, at least specifically. I think I'm going to do something here. I think I'm going to gift you that school. I think yeah, I want to be true to my big board here

and take a team. You keep mentioning a school. You keep mentioning national titles. This school has none. It's Kansas State. They're located in the little apple. That purple and silver does it for me.

Great Unis. Bill Snyder will win a Natty before long. I'm sure of it. They're hungry. They're going to leave Virginia Tech as the only Power 5 team without one.

and that logo, it's like a magic guy deal. K-State is added to my list. Yeah, Kansas State, for me, was going to be the bottom of the barrel just to be contentious, I think. But I'm going to take Iowa State here. That's who I thought you would take here. Yeah, I really like Iowa State. I mean, I obviously like this guy, Matt Campbell, who doesn't, right? We're going to find out he's like a serial killer.

That's how this thing ends. I love the McDonald's colors. You know I'm big McDonald's colors guy. I didn't take it. Ames, Ames, Iowa. You know there's not much going on there because whenever they show the shot of, like, the town, the local fair, it's just like a fountain that's half frozen.

So I don't know so much about Ames. I just know that Iowa State is carved out a nice little niche as a team that's going to be in range of winning that conference every year. People respect them. You know that they're probably not going to get the recruiting that in Oklahoma or a Clemson in our conference gets, but somehow they make it work and they win eight games a year.

And they're in range. With my final pick, I'm going to go Texas Tech. Now, it's a place that people just seem to leave. That's what I think of when I think of Lubbock, Texas. People just leaving the place. I don't know why I've never been there.

But they were just in a national title game in hoops with Chris Beard who has gone on to burnt orange pastures and they've had some interesting football teams. You might remember the 2008 Gator Bowl. Graham Harold tossing the rock all around to Michael Crabtree and such.

Texas Tech guns up is what they say, which is kind of cool to do when you're at a bar and they're a bunch of your fellow red Raiders. Oh, there's nothing that looks more drunk, 50-year-old football fan than just waving two fake pistols in the air. And what the hell was the song, Little Naz X? Old Town Road. Old Town Road. They commandeered that song at the 2019 Final Four.

Horses in the back. Guns Up. They're a rowdy crew. They wear cowboy hats. They wear boots. Of course, Texas Tech is on my roster, leaving you with the final pick. It's funny because I was going to take Texas Tech last, and I didn't want to give that away, and you took Texas Tech. I would rather be in Lawrence, Kansas, with a big office and a desk than in Lubbock, Texas. What'd you do in Lubbock? Did you bring a souvenir home?

Yeah, there's a giant welt on the back of my because they got hit with a bat, Like literally, they throw shit at you at that stadium. Where are the trees? There are no trees. Google image Lubbock, Texas should be like a drinking game. If you find a tree in Lubbock, Texas, you drink. Because there's no trees. I mean, which makes it a shitty drinking game.

But I say that to say it's difficult. If you Google Lubbock, Texas, four reasons Lubbock is dangerous, is one of the articles. Lubbock rounds out the top 10 with nearly 360 drunk driving crashes each year. In addition to death, drunk drivers also cause injuries and property damage costing millions. And let's see. Violent crime. Hey man. I didn't crap all over all of your picks.

You have a pick to make here. I Google image search Lubbock, Texas. I see the friendliest city in America. Bitch. Murder is next on this. They're just doing charts on this Lubbock article. Robbery. Make your final pick, please.

They got a lot of aggravated assault and burglary, too. Do I have to do it for you? Orsony. Vehicle theft, arson. I don't know how anything catches on fire in Lubbock. There's nothing to catch fire in Lubbock. It's concrete buildings and tumbleweeds, which burn out like relatively quickly, I would think. Property crime is.

and then weather damage. They have dust storms in Lubbock, so enjoy that. Who's left, dude? Baylor, dude. You're talking about murder and assault. And then you have to pick Baylor. Golly, I do. You walked right into it.

Known for. Bailer, let me spin this positively. 11 national titles. Really good basketball program. Cool uniforms and basketball. Oh, RG3s become cool. And it seems like a pretty happy place, Baylor, Texas. I've done a 180 on it.

Yeah. Is that like Waco, Texas at all? Yeah. It is Waco, isn't it? It is. Waco, more trees than Lubbock. I can deal with Waco. The hell of the spin zone.

Yeah. All right. My group is West Virginia, Kansas, as you know, K-State and Texas Tech. you've got TCU, Oklahoma State, Iowa State, and the Baylor Bears. I feel really good about my four, and I'm feeling really good about Baylor. I'm really feeling good about spending a weekend in Baylor. Really turning the corner on that whole culture of fucking insanity that they have going on there.

I think we have a loyal listener who's a big Baylor fan. Shout out to you. Shout out to anybody in Baylor, Texas listening. Of course, we also know that as Waco. there's so much good to associate with Waco. Yes. Literally when I think about Waco, I think about like cults. Like that was our childhood.

Like when we were kids, we were taught that Waco was full of crazy people. That's why I'm trying to rebrand Waco as Baylor. By the way, I know that Bill Snyder has retired at K-State. He's just synonymous with K-State. Dr. Fax and I were on assignment. We had Gardner Minshu in,

and we talked to him for a little bit. I assume he was charming, happy go lucky, charismatic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He was all those things. So we're going to have Minchew on, Moonshine Minchew, whatever you want to call him. Did you call him moonshine? Did you give? Well, we floated that to him.

I think what's probably going to happen is in about a month, he's going to float that as a nickname that he thought of as on his own. and he will reap the massive financial benefits and brand benefits. But just know it started here, he also has coined the nickname La Flama Blanca lately. Wow. Yeah, I know I told her. I didn't say get off my corner,

but I said I felt like you were Ivan Dechenko to my Danny McBride there, my Kenny Powers. So we laughed about it, but nobody really committed to getting off of one another's corner. So we'll see how that develops. whatever you want to call him. He's Gardner Menshoe, and you'll find out that he's not comfortable being number two in Jacksonville. He wants to win the job.

So possibly relevant information for Mayor Matt from Trevor Lawrenceville, the home of the Greenlight Pod Day. All right, let's get Minchew on with Dr. Fax and stick around for a little rundown, a good, bad, and ugly wrap this thing up. And we'll talk to you after Moonshine. All right, joining us now. Is Gardner Minshu the second on pro football reference? He has only a couple nicknames. I thought I would peg him for a five, six nickname guy. We've got mustache.

We've got jockstrap king. I've also heard you recently coined the phrase La Flama Blanca, which you and I have both coined in the past. I'm going to pass the torch to you. I feel like you're Ivan Dechenko to my Kenny Powers. Yes, exactly right. Just two guys that enjoy some good pageantry, you know? Exactly.

But then lastly, we've called you Moonshine Minchu on this show because we think it has a ring to it. I've made moonshine in the past. I mean, it fits. Have you made shine? 100%. Yeah. It was pretty terrible, but I made it and I drank it. So it was safe?

They'll see it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you got to, you got to, this is the blue flame thing true. Like the blue flame over the spoon. Can you explain that? So basically, I think you run a fine line of making like basically ethanol. But I think we just made alcohol.

Nobody's gone blind yet. It's all good. So with all those nicknames, which one do you prefer? Oh, dude, it's whatever, man. Just as long as you call me, call me. And the most recent piece of non-football stuff with you, which was a little devastating to me personally, As somebody who's growing a mullet right now,

I've been hit on twice in Montana by young ladies that really prefer the Tennessee waterfall. It's like Cologne up here in Montana. You lost your mullet. What happened? Were you going through something? No, man, there's a time for everything. You know, there's a time to let it grow

and there's a time to cut it off. You know, I think, you know, one of the beautiful things about it, you know, was the short lifespan it had. You know, I feel like if it goes too long, then, you know, people get used to it. But I think there's a beauty in the, you know, the limited timeline that it existed on this earth. Makes you appreciate the time you have with it. Exactly. Is there a post-mullet

depression? Do you feel weird for a couple days with like all of that, that air on the back of your neck? You want to hear something crazy, man? So right before I went, right before I went and got a cut, I went camping. And whenever they cut it off, I found a tick on the back of my head. It was like a few days later. That was honestly probably a good thing. You know, I was going to get a mind disease or something, but I think they have trouble crawling through the waterfall, so I don't think that tick was on you the past three, four years. Well, no, they nestle in there, man. I think it's, that's where everybody wants to be, you know. I can't blame it, honestly. Hey, what do the women in your life think about the change in, in your hairstyle? Uh, yeah, my mom's pretty much just over everything that I do at this point,

you know, it started with the mustache and, you know, she got sick of that pretty, pretty quick. And then, you know, it's only gone downhill from there. Um, so yeah, it's, but the one thing I learned with the mullet, um, you know, it got you, uh, all kinds of attention, but a lot of time is, it was that attention that you really didn't want, you know, I'm saying. Um, you know, some of these, these ladies down south, like, take charge and, you know, yeah, it's a little scary when you got something like that, it's something to grab onto, you know, and you don't want two chicks from Mississippi fighting over you. Yeah, that's not good. Well, depending on how you look at it, it's good or not good for the both of them.

Where are you on shampoo? Trevor Lawrence, you know, your new teammate, what kind of shampoo is he using? What kind of shampoo did you use to keep that thing tame? Man, honestly, like, I think whatever, I don't know what he uses, but whatever it is, it works. I think he's had a system in place for years now. It looks like this isn't, you know, he didn't just figure it out. He's had great hair for a long time. You know, I had, I had some specific mullet shampoo.

I'd have like a unicorn on the bottle. And it's in the tail? Was it main and tail? No, it wasn't main tail. It wasn't it. You're using horsesho? I was like, I'm not going to get it. No, it was a unicorn shampoo for mullets, which is the unicorn of all haircuts.

So I need to figure out that name. Oh, come to me at some point. Yeah, I was walking through Murdox the other day. If you know where Murdox, you know, Murdox is a chain. but it's like a ranch store and, you know, they had the main and tail. And I was thinking to myself, maybe I need to run that through the waterfall and see what happens. I want to start with some current event type stuff. You've been paying attention to the NIL stuff, I'm sure.

People are getting paid. QBs are getting paid. It's totally chill. I think everybody freaked out and thought that it would be something where, like, the world would end as soon as college athletes got cut a check, but nothing's changed. you in college had this come down before you were done at Washington State how much money would garden mince you have made and what would you have lend your likeness and image to yeah no it had been great man Washington State was amazing the real question is how much money would I have spent I know me at 2021 with a pocket

full of cash probably wouldn't have been the best thing but man I don't know you know I think I think it's a great thing for these kids, be able to support themselves. But I just know the dangers I can come with that as well, you know. What does Gardner Minchu spending money on that you can share on this podcast in 2018? Oh, in 18? Dude, so I didn't spend money on nothing, dude. I bought a mattress off Facebook Marketplace for $10. It was listed at five, but I got there, and I pulled up to this trailer, and she was like,

man, could you give me 10? I was like, yeah, I'll give you 10. And then I found a dresser that was next to a dumpster. It wasn't in a dumpster. It was next to a dumpster. Totally acceptable. I got that. And then I got a little side table from the thrift store for five bucks.

So honestly, I don't spend too much money from being honest. You know, it's funny because actually on my list of current events, we have the Olympic Village bed situation, which I know you've probably seen. And I'm really glad that you said that because I believe we're kindred spirits on this thing. I actually prefer sleeping on the ground as close to the ground as I can. And as I've accrued wealth through playing football and gotten married and accrued children, the wife expects, my lovely wife expects that we probably sleep on like a real bed. I like sleeping as close to the floor as possible. Is that what it is for you or are you just like a little bit frugal? Yeah, it's probably just me being a cheap ass more than anything from being honest.

But, you know, I've spent plenty of nights, you know, on that hard ground. And I think I'm a better man for it as well. What kind of bed are you rocking these days now that you're your big time NFL Garderman chute? Yeah, you know, when we first come in as rookies, they give us that sleep number certificate, you know, worth $5,000 and I spend everything. I figured out, you know, what kind of, what's the best bed, what's the best sheets, what, you know, everything I could get for that $5,000 without going over. So I got me a good sleep number. That's pretty great. That's great that you cash that thing in because a lot of guys will let that thing sit in their locker and forget that it's,

it's there and you... You better not do it around me. I definitely didn't use mine at all. That's so bad, dude. At home. You could have one of those mattresses that reclines and goes up and down and all that shit. So another current event here.

People are going to space, Gardner. Yeah. Is it worth it? I don't know, man. You know, it's kind of like there's everything out there in space, but there's also kind of nothing in space. So, I mean, I don't know. I, like, you know, honestly, if I could do it,

you know what it'd be kind of cool right what two teammates would you take what two teammates shoot i'd take my guy miles jack you know just for uh you know commentary and comic relief and then i don't know i'd probably probably Andrew norwell you know he'd uh he'd probably take care of me in case anybody tried to pull up you know that's uh that's who i'd want to take the space oh that motherfucker finishes plays dude 100% he's like we were in preseason one time and i was just like bro it's preseason come want. I'm like, that's the guy you want if you're a quarterback in front of you. I mean, he does not take a playoff.

And he's the one I always say, you know, if on our team we're in like a hunger game type situation, I'm picking big nasty up the way, you know. He's just got that want to about him, that nasty. You always got to have that guy. Last off the wall question before we get into your athletic career here, we've got a debate raging on on this show for the past few weeks about tubing a river or floating a river. capacity. You seem like a guy that floats a river. Okay. Yeah, yeah. No, that's what I shoot, about a couple months ago, I was floating the springs down in Florida, man. It's awesome. I love it.

Yeah. No, it's their debate. Yeah, exactly. I can't believe there is a debate, but Nate says he can't get drunk on a river anymore. And that my co-host, who's not in today, says that it's a child activity. No, that's just not right, you know. There's some things you got to put your foot down and say, you know, there's right and wrong in this world. And I think it's right to get drunk on the rivers of America. You know, I just don't see any counterarguments of that. There is none, except being sunburnt, if you forget your spray. We were trying to build out the perfect river float wondering what's the light beer of choice, what's the liquor of choice for Gardner Minshue, what's the flotation device of choice, a snack, do you like cliff diving? What's your perfect day on the

river. Yeah, man. Shoot, we got these springs down here in Florida. They're like super clear water. I'll just throw some goggles on and go swim around those things for a while. That's pretty sweet. But also, you know, just floating. The biggest thing is you need a good current because that's the worst is you have to start paddling. That'll mess everything up. Yeah, you're dragging ass. You're burning calories. You need that lazy river. You know what I'm saying? You don't need that active river. You need that lazy river. You can just lay back. And yeah, man, you give me some good, Bud Light and some Titos. You won't hear any complaints out of me.

Bud Light and Titoes. There we go. All right. We're not far off here. I like to go to Natty Light just to bring me back to my college days. Keep you humble. Again, yeah, keep you humble. Keep you grounded. Exactly.

For somebody frugal, you would understand that. So I was doing some digging, man. You know, before you were a football star, you were on the Brandon First United Methodist Church basketball league team. Okay? And I'm reading that you guys beat a team. 60 to 2. Do you ever worry about going to hell because of that?

No. You know, I feel like, you know, maybe they should worry about, you know, not, you know, playing to the best of their abilities. You know, I play to glorify the Lord. That's what I was doing. There we go. Do you think the Lord likes half-asses?

I don't think so. You remember your stat line from that game? Do you remember your stat line? No, the only thing I remember from that game is I had a buddy that gave up their one layup. It was like in the second half. And I didn't talk to him for a while. I mean, that was, that was just pretty ridiculous.

They had no business scoring two points. Dude, like an incredibly competitive, you know, kind of setting, I would imagine, to be beating a team 60 to. Your coach was wild. Dude, we, we had practices. We were running full court trap, half court trap. And it wasn't fair, honestly. Like, it was too much fun.

We were running the one-three-one the whole time. running, pushing it, you know, except for the one guy that gave up two points, Josh Stowers. Oh, I was waiting to see him. I was saying my name. I was just like, all right, hold on. So you grew up in Mississippi, you're surrounded by SEC powerhouses. And, like, obviously, you know, we talk about the different schools that you've been, like, all over the map. But you never spent time in the SEC.

I mean, I guess you were close to going to Bama. But looking back at it now, is there a school that would have fit kind of your energy and like who you are as a dude the best in the SEC? I don't know, man. You know, I know they get pretty rowdy down at LSU. But, you know, at Washington State, we threw it like 70 times a game. I think they threw it like 70 times a year at the time. That wouldn't have been as much fun.

But yeah, I don't know, man. I just never, you know, never made it around over there. I guess I wasn't, you know, they say it means more. I guess I just didn't mean enough to them. It didn't mean enough to you. I love that. Yeah, I know. That LSU energy, though, is something else. Like, whenever I go down to sugar bowl for fun and they're playing down there, it's like, man, I could have seen myself in school here. I really do think, I mean, like the fan base is crazy. But I wonder, like, for you bouncing around was you seem like an adaptable guy and that probably serves you well at the next level with everything. the NFL throws at you, but like, there's probably moments where you're lonely in college. Like, you're like, fuck, dude. Like, is this worth it? I don't love where I am. I'm alone here. Was there that moment for you? Uh, yeah. I mean, there was a couple. You know, when I first got to Troy, that was the first, you know, first time being away from home, first time for everything.

That's kind of tough, you know, but, you know, got through that. Um, and then I remember at ECU, my first summer there, everybody, like, left town for July 4th. And I was like the only one. So I went to the movies and I just went and watched like three movies in a row. Just got one ticket and then just walked around, you know, made it through there. You know, but honestly, you know, you get through a July 4th like that. I think you can pretty much do anything. Yeah, what were the movies? Do you remember?

Did you, you didn't slip around? It was Tarzan, which I was excited for. And, you know, wasn't, you know, wasn't anything to write home about. Then I watched, I think it was like the second purge, which was, you know, not also not great. and then there was one other and at that point it didn't even matter you know I was just there

how good is that Halloween party at uh in G Vegas isn't that what y'all call it down there hallow week man it's it's the best I'm telling you like there's nothing like it um you know you got to you got the hard thing is you got to have multiple costumes you know you know most time

you think you just got to get one no you got to get three maybe four uh if you're planning on having a good week um what was your best what was your best And what was your worst? My best was when I got to Washington State. I did an awesome white Goodman from, you know, Dodgeball. Because when I had the mustache, everything going, the hair was feathered and lethal.

It was perfect. You know, I'm actually made it myself. You know, I got like the spider pads that we have. Oh, perfect. Like I drew up like a big cobra, you know, and that was cool. I'd say, yeah, that was my best one for sure. Do you have one you look back on and you're like, I didn't bring my A game? Man, it was probably sixth grade.

Me and my buddy, we went like basically in drag and like mine was a, it was like pageant queens and I was misdemeanor. How about he's 12? How about he's 12? Like how fucking polluted was his mind? Somebody didn't have parental controls on the main shoe house. Yeah. That was great. That's fucking good. All right.

So Mike Leach stories, because eventually after Troy, after, what was it, Northwest Mississippi, was it, Juko? Yep. The Juko stuff is crazy. Right? Like, that's like a really hungry, I mean, like, I don't know if you've ever, like one of my best buddies, Eugene Sims, who I played with, who's from Mississippi, he's from Mize. And he went to a Juko down there, and he told me it was the most. competitive environment he's ever been in by like 100 yards. I mean, so what was that environment like for a quarterback and what did you see? Oh, that was awesome, man. You know, like, school's like

pretty easy, you know, so that's not really a big deal. So outside of that, like, you literally play football and hang out with your friends because there's nothing, nothing else to do. Like, they're all in these small towns all over Mississippi. And I loved it because, I mean, everybody's trying to get the hell out of there, you know, it's not a place anybody's trying to hang around three or four years. like everybody's on the same goal to move up and move out. And I think it just creates a great environment where guys push each other. And it was a blast for me. I love it.

And I feel like it just collects a lot of kids who don't have another choice. And so like the competitiveness probably is just off the charts. I mean, if you can get, if you can survive Juko and Mississippi or, you know, like you said, one of these small towns that probably really tests your sanity sometimes a little bit. Absolutely. Because you're there for football. That's the only reason. Like if you have any other reasons, like you're not going to make it.

You know, so it really tells, you know, how much you, how bad you really want. What is like the Edmonton of Jucco cities? I'm not no shade Edmonton, but people say it's cold and desolate there. Yeah, I mean, I think they're all pretty much about the same. But I will say East Mississippi, Scova, Mississippi. I got a few buddies, got a teammate right now, Dakota Allen went there. Nothing. Like they got this great football facility out in the middle of nowhere.

and it's crazy. Like they got a subway, and then down the street, they have another subway. I mean, that's like, yeah. They got choices. If they're out of fucking meatballs at the one, good, dude.

You end up, though, up in Washington, which probably won a big culture shock. It's like just a way different place. I know it's beautiful up there and all that, but, you know, you end up with Mike Leach, and I hear the pitch was, hey, if you go to one of these SEC schools, you're not going to throw the ball.

He made promises to you. Was that relationship, did that hit the ground running, or did it take, like, some growing pains between y'all? No, it was great, man. I loved Coach Leach, man. You know, one of the things people don't really know about Coach Leach is Coach Leach loves the Florida Keys. Like, he's down there more than he's anywhere else.

So, like, I saw him, like, for my first weekend at Washington State, and I don't know if I saw him again until camp. So it's kind of a different deal. He's in the keys. Like, that's no ifs, any of buts about it. But I remember, like, the first phone call, it was because during practice that day, me and our starting middle linebacker got in a fight.

And that's when, like, he called me, and, like, we talked for, like, an hour. And I knew, like, that's when I was kind of winning over to him and winning over the team. And, yeah, that's really when it started. How'd you pick the starting middle linebacker to fight with? Is this one of those situations where you walk in the first day and you got to beat up the biggest fat?

this guy. No, well, first off, he ain't the biggest and baddest. That's my boy Payton Floor. We're like, no. But, dude, it was like one of those days, offense is kind of struggling. We fumble. He brings it over to me. I throw it back at him.

And it kind of, you know, all kind of gets. Oh, I know that move. Yeah. You know, I mean, it was, you know, just especially, you know, you'd halfway through camp. Everybody hates everybody. Yeah. It doesn't take much at all. Throwing the ball thing back at a defensive player.

That's like when you do it, you know that something follows. Yeah. Yeah. And honestly, that was the first fight we got in. We got another one like on the by week too, like where he kind of like punched the ball out late. And I just kind of punched him in his face a little bit. And like, didn't go anywhere from there. But I was just like, cut this shit out, dude.

That's the best part about college fights. For the most part, guys make up. When you fight the NFL, it's hard. it's harder to make up. You're like, dude, I have, you know, I have a family at home. I can't, I can't be fighting people. So with Mike Leach, a little backstory, Danny Amandola and me came up together and Danny went to Texas Tech with Mike. And I'm sure Mike's talked about Danny. But every year we'd go to Bonaroo and when the whole thing was shut down at three in the morning, we go back in our RV and call Mike Leach. And Mike Leach would always pick up. And me and Mike Leach have probably talked

to combine like three hours on the phone. I remember. or none of it. We talked to Coachella in the middle of the day. He picked up and talked to us for 30 minutes. Do you ever drunk down Mike Leach? Man, yeah, it always just happens. And then actually, we got some teammates that have this app where they can get people to call each other, you know, from other phones.

So they did that for like two weeks back and forth with me and Coach Leach. And we were like just talking like every other day for like two weeks about nothing. What is this app? What is this app? I don't know. They figured it out, but like, it was hilarious. We need that app. Definitely to find out what that app is. That sounds hilarious. Because he just comes up to text me, hey, man, I'm just calling you back. I'm like, what? I'm like, all right, I'm going to call him. We should end up talking about nothing for, you know, 20, 30 minutes at a time.

What's your favorite leach rant? Do you have one that you've seen on YouTube that that's your favorite? And is there one that needs to come to light that he often hits the players with? man he had like his like rehearsed um like Friday speech uh you know going to the hotel you know we're not going to wear any other team's hats because we don't give a about any other teams and like and everybody could just kind of do it along with him you know the whole thing because he said the same thing every week and that was always fun my year we were actually pretty good so he really didn't rip into us too much the last what I'm curious about is the pirate obsession. Is he really obsessed with pirates?

Yeah, no, he's all about it. He has the whole pirate, the pirate chest in his locker. I mean, in his office, yeah, he's all for it. It's kind of, it's kind of wild. So you end up in Jacksonville. You get kind of, I feel like your first two years, man, it's so hard for you. I know you're not going to complain, but, you know, like, you don't get into the game until Nick Foals goes down, my boy. broke his collarbones. So you go right in and you're slinging darts, which is awesome, but you haven't had reps with the ones. You know, and then the next year with COVID, you don't have time to work out with the ones. And that makes a big difference for people

that don't know in the NFL, especially on offense. How have you, like, how have you overcome that? Yeah. I think, you know, one of the biggest things I've learned in the NFL is everybody kind of take care of their own shit, you know? Um, you know, and I think it's, starts with, you know, making sure you know everything backwards and forms, you know, and I think if you do that, then, you know, as you have other guys add them in, you can help bring them along. And I think that's one of the biggest things I've learned, you know, you really have to know it first for yourself before you can, you know, do much else. Yeah, it's hard because you're a young quarterback. It's like people expect somebody to be

a leader, but you're learning your stuff too. And I know it's hard to walk that line between, like, hey, I just need to handle my shit. I can't be a hypocrite. If I'm making a mistakes I can't get on other people. But that's unrealistic. I know you have to step up even as you're learning. Yeah, absolutely. And that's when I think, you know, at certain point, you just have to say, screw it, you know, you're just going to, you're a ball player at some point, you know, and you've got to have that swagger of a ball player where you're walking out there and you know you're the baddest one out there. And, you know, even if it might not be true at the time, you know, you got to believe it or else nobody else will. So, you know, that's, that confidence is a huge thing.

Has that helped you? Because you seem like a guy who can thrive in chaos. And when you're like on a team, you know, no offense, it's the last two teams you've been on, but they haven't been, you know, top of the league, talent-wise, younger teams. There's chaos, dude. Like, I've been on a lot of teams like that.

And I don't know if it helps you because you can get off script. And there will be things that are off script. Have you kind of taken pride in that amid a little bit of that chaos? Yeah. I mean, I think, you know, you hit on earlier. you have to be adaptable. And I think, you know, my whole kind of career, you know, being everywhere, learning, it's like, I think it's nine offenses in eight years,

you know, all of that kind of trains you to be adaptable to, you know, hey, situation's not going to be perfect, but, you know, you have to make it work. And I think that's something that's served me well. How do you find spaces to throw? I mean, like, obviously, you're not six, five, like, who cares? There's not, you know, that's not, we're not doing that anymore. But you guys have to have a knack, like realistically that taller guys might not.

Is there some secret sauce for you as far as like finding lanes? Not necessarily. I mean, a lot of times, you know, you're seeing it. You're not even like seeing it like that. You know, you know where as long as you can see where the defensive guy is, you know, you know where your guy's going to be. And I think a lot of times you have to be good at that. And then sometimes, you know, it just happens where you see it.

But, you know, growing up, I was always watching Drew Brees, trying to see his, He's so good with his just subtle moves to fine lanes, you know, not taking a step of yard over, but, you know, maybe sliding six inches, and that buys me enough space to, you know, put it between you guys. But, you know, I think that's all the things that, you know, I'm working on and continuing to work on.

Yeah, and I feel like as a rusher, I mean, we give you guys that step up lane between, you know, the B and the C a lot, so to speak. I feel like you do that really well where you climb and hide and then find a lane. I feel like so many of your highlights are off script, which is fun, and it's, I think, why people are drawn to your style of play. Is there one play or one game that I think perfectly kind of encompasses what you're about

that you've had so far in the NFL? Yeah, I mean, my favorite play, man, was playing against Denver, and I drop back, make, like, one guy missed, another, like, slide up, and next guy comes through, make him miss, and one more. And then the running back who's running a swing route comes all the way around to the back of the end zone and back out. And we throw it and score touchdown. And that ends up propelling us to go win the game. I thought that was just so much fun, you know.

What's the hardest you've been hit, you know, like yet? Like, were you buying time or were you sitting in the pocket? You have to remember one that you were just like, holy shit, this felt different than college. Yeah, dude, it was my first preseason game. We're playing the Ravens. and we have like kind of a low snap and I bobble it. And like right as I stand up,

the blitz and linebacker just hits me right in the teeth, knocks my helmet off and everything. It was awesome. Like, I was showing somebody in the video that it was really good. And the worst part is it's the first one. So you're thinking like, oh, is everyone, is all these hits like this?

Dude, I got my helmet knocked off three times in my first preseason game. I was like, God, dang. I think you ball. didn't you ball in your first preseason game? No. No, you bought, wait, did you ball in preseason? I feel like you bawled in preseason at some point you had to.

No, it played okay, man. I actually led the NFL in like snaps played in the preseason, which is just a stat that nobody wants. That's what it was. You were trending a lot in preseasoned. Yeah, it helped me so much, though, you know, getting all those, you know, hits in the face. Oh, yeah.

James Robinson. How much fun was it to see this kid last? year. And do you think like, I feel like you got this too, like your rookie year. You were in, you should have been in the conversation for rookie year. You know, like your numbers were there, you know, and Kyla was being talked about. Do you feel like it's really hard not to fly under the radar down there? And that's no indictment on the fan base. It's just people don't pay attention at this point. Yeah. No, I think that's a big part of it. Also, you know, I came in six round. James is undrafted. You know, definitely not getting the attention from the jump, like some of the guys

are getting. But man, it was awesome seeing James. Like, he's a guy, like, whenever he's there in camp, like, you just started seeing flashes, man. He just had great vision, great patience. And, you know, you knew if you ever got a chance, he'd be pretty good. And he's also a guy, like, I'm pretty sure he's, like, I think he's from Illinois, like, state high school rushing record, led to FCS and rushing two times. And now we're like, we're surprised he's a good football player. Like, seriously? Like, dude's always been good. Like, I think we just have. have to be more less surprised about the player and just more used to the fact that like the system doesn't get it right and if we'd stop being surprised like it would make more sense to

us and I also think like stigmas follow guys like so you could play like a first rounder and you know people might keep that tag on your head because they're so dogmatic these talent evaluators and coaches they're like they that's such a confirmation bias for them and for me I was drafted high and I had a slow start for a year and a half. I looked like a real bust. So that was hard to overcome. Like, football, the football world, like, they can't get out of their own way with their confirmation bias.

I feel like evaluating players. Absolutely. And I think a lot of it's kind of an ego thing. You know, they all want to prove how right they were. You know, they take a guy early, you know, we got to be right on this guy. They're going to give him every chance, you know. If a guy does well late, you know, well, he's still, you know, limited or he's still, you know, this is why, you know, we didn't.

And I think it's always trying to prove them. themselves right. And so just kind of taking guys for what they are. Okay, so new system in 2021. What's the difference between your old offense and this new one? And how excited are you about it? Yeah, I'm fired up, man. Coach Bev, he's awesome. You know, I think you want to learn one thing in the NFL. Everybody does basically the same stuff. You know, it's going to be, you know, who calls it different in the game. You know, one thing we've been working, you know, some more of the spread, RPO stuff, which I love. Like that's so much fun to me.

It's how the game's supposed to be played. You know, so I think, you know, doing that's coming along. That's going to be a big help force as well. Do you think that defenses have like not caught up to the RPO, but like they've definitely probably tried to evolve the way they play it. And you being like one of these college quarterbacks in the era of like, you know, hey, this is what we do. It's totally different from when Nate and I played college football.

but like do you think defenses have adjusted and what have you seen them do? Yeah, no, I think they've adjusted. Basically how they're like backside linebackers play to play. You know, everybody's teaching you. They're going to pop pop and then read it out. But I think, you know, there's still a lot of stuff there, you know, as the RPO game can continue to evolve, that you can stay kind of one step ahead. Because that's what I mean, I really feel like usually you see in the NFL, you know,

offense is usually a couple years, then defense sketched up, and then it's the next hot thing, you know, and it just kind of goes in waves like that. And that's why I think you've got to stay on top of, you know, so there is more ingenuity offensively, you know, that can, you know, stay ahead of the defensive. A lot of meat on the ball. Yeah.

You know, like, and I feel like Jacksonville is a great fit for you. The people love you. I feel like you have a real, it's not contrived. It's a real kind of, hey, I'm home thing there, at least from the outside. And I wonder, as you've kind of immersed yourself in that culture, what's your favorite Jaguar fan kind of tradition, some idiosyncrasy that they have that you've fallen in love with? I know Nate might have something to say about this too from his time down there.

Move on. You can't be that. But I think one of the cool things is when I came in, you know, rocking the jorts and, you know, the mustache and then even the mullet, they've been doing that here. Like that's not new to them, you know what I'm saying? Like it's just like, oh, it's another guy doing it. Like, you look up in the stands like, oh, he's dressed like me. No, he's been coming to games like that for the year.

You know, I think it's just- Yeah. Quick question. You're wearing the costume. Hey, quick question, since I used to play in Jacksonville, Jackson DeVille, the mascot, what's the most impressive thing that you've seen him do since you've been there? When he does the jumping off thing, and, uh, I don't know what it is.

It's like bungee jumping. Yeah. Like, that's ridiculous. So like, I'm feeding a mascot to do that. Yeah, no. He's, I hope he gets paid the most. But like I know like from playing there, people might not know it unless you're a diehard Jags fan or down there.

But he does the most unbelievable stunts that really I don't think a mascot should do, but it's definitely entertaining. But at least a couple times a year, he ziplines into the stadium from like the top lights. Like it's stuff that like if you're getting ready for, a game, like, you have to kind of like, like, zone out for a second to be like, what is he doing? What is he about to do? Dude, I always, I always take a second and just watch, you know, just like, heck, yeah,

this is it right here. What about the pool? I always watch the pool. I'm, I'm so fascinated with the pool. There have to be people peeing in the pool. You know it. There's no, there's no doubt about it. I mean, you look up there.

I guess we got a couple of them now. You know, I think it's great. I'd love to be out there sometimes, you know, on a real hot day. No question. Your fourth quarter, middle of the fourth quarter of a game, if you were in the stand, you're jumping in that thing. Yeah, no doubt. 100%.

A lot of faith in chlorine. Yeah, I mean, you got to, you know. I think, you know, honestly, you, I think pretty much everybody, I saw a stat. It was everybody that was in those pools in the last couple years. None of them got COVID. They were me. Oh, that's good.

That's good. That's good. That's good. I think I saw an article on that. Oh my goodness. I think I saw an article on that. The Jaguars Pool. Tebow, larger than life still?

Like, what do you? Because I feel like you have to know like regionally, even though you're young. It's just, it's really hard to understand as a college football player how big time he was. Like, because I've played about the same time with him. And I wonder if you, if you ever catch yourself, like, having to talk to a team and be like, that's fucking Tim Tebow, dude. Dude, every day. It's so cool.

Like, dude, I throw him touchdown and just the best thing ever. I was going crazy just yelling Tebow touchdown. Like, that's what, like, I had his jersey going up. Like, I went to one of his games. I actually shook his hand before a game. He doesn't remember it. But, you know, that's something that'll stick with me for a lot. What an asshole.

Come on. Yeah, right? And just pretty bad, pretty bad, dude. That guy. That's, yeah. But, no, it's so cool, man. And, like, you meet him and he's everything you'd want him to be and more. Like, it's so cool.

Yeah, I just everybody has said, and I've met him once or twice. He's, like, just the genuine. He is Tim Tebow. It is not a myth. It's so cool. Which is so rare to meet people that are not, like, myths. Like, they're not fraud. I mean, how are you guys using him?

Do you feel like he's, like, he's come to work like a rookie mindset-wise? Absolutely. You know, we haven't been in Pad yet, pads yet. So, you know, kind of figure that out more in camp. But, I mean, he's attacking special teams drills. he's attacking every drill. He's running drill to drill. You know, everything is high energy with him.

You know, if he messes something up, you know, you see some guys can shake it. It affects him. You know, he doesn't like it. He wants to get it right. He's going to go to the side, get a couple reps, get right, and come back in. And he's a guy just genuinely wants it, man. Yeah. It's awesome to see.

He's got to have that dad strength now, too. I mean, I feel like he got stronger from college. I don't know what happened, bro. but he's just like, I'm kind of worried he might be able to like body slam me. And I'm like, holy shit, I used to tackle you for a living. Yeah, he's pretty yoked up, dude. Like, you should see how much this dude eats, man. He eats all the time.

It's crazy. What's he snacking on, bro? Dude, so we'll have practice. And then, you know, we'll go to a lift after. And he's going to have a shake, two wraps and like maybe something else before the lift. It's like, dude, just straight protein, man. I love it. And he's still power cleaning and doing all that crazy.

shit. Man, I saw him on the road machine the other day. Like, it was ridiculous. You know, I think everybody in the way room was kind of getting mad. They're having to change so many plates. You know, he's just blowing it out. Look at the V-O-2 max on that guy over there, huh? Just happens to be a fucking legend. Lungs are enormous. All right. So this year, I mean, you know, you hear trade rumors, that sort of thing. I don't expect you comment on anything like that. But just your mindset coming into a season where, like, realistically, they drafted, you know, who they hope to be the second coming, and you're still competitive. Like, you want to play football.

I guarantee that. So how do you take your mindset into a very abnormal year? Yeah, well, I'll tell you this, man, in preparation for the competition, I haven't taken a shit in weeks. It's not an option for me. Number two is not an option. I say that. I like, I feel like anybody that comes in and thinks that's a

option that's what they're going to get. You know what I'm saying? That's a bar right there. So you don't, you don't want a no stool softener for you then. No, sir. I'm holding it. Like South Park when they eat a bunch of P.F. Chang's. Damn, dude, that's what, that is a bar.

That's a bar. But yeah, man, that's what, like, you know, I know the work I put in. I trust that. I'm as ready as I can be. So, I mean, it doesn't matter outside of that. You know, I'm fired up because I like how I play right now. That's awesome, ma'am. That's awesome. Well, I love that you have that attitude.

I know fans do too because it's fun to watch. And so we wish you the best. Moonshine Minchu, we'll call you that on this show. But whatever you want to call him, he's Gardner Minshu, and he is coming to compete this year. Thank you, Garner. Thank you. I appreciate it, Tom. My impressions of the kid, he'd be a lot of fun to play with. I think this is going to be a tough year for him, obviously.

with Trevor Lawrence and even Beth are now in town. But he seems to have an attitude where he's a competitor and it's not going to scare him. I just think it's good for the league if this kid's playing football. So free Gardner Menchu, where would you think he should get traded? I don't know. Who are the teams that they're rumoring he gets traded to? Cowboy Reid, do you know? Cowboys.

He's been linked to the Broncos as well. I would enjoy that. a nice little three-way QB. Mile high, mile high minchu, maybe? Mile high minchew, these things right themselves. He hangs out in Denver, he could probably bring that demon horse to life

outside the airport. He might try to ride it. I mean, we're definitely getting some demon horse content if he goes to Denver. Who is the third team there? He's also linked to the lions, Panthers, Giants. There's a few other teams, you know,

I mean, he was ranked in one article as like a top 10 backup quarterback, but also a top 25 quarterback in the league. So anybody can use him. He's, you have three quarterbacks down there, Lawrence, Bethard and Minshu, who all have either high ceilings with Lawrence or have NFL experience.

So you'd think that a trade would come to fruition here somewhere. Well, there's Manhattan, Minshu. Yeah. I could see that. There's also already like a guy who likes to run around naked and a cowboy hat with a mullet up there.

There's like in Manhattan, there's a guy that takes tips to like walker. You know who I'm talking about? Yeah, the cow, isn't it like cowboy? The Manhattan Cowboy, the half-niquet, the Manhattan Cowboy. Minchu likes to do, you know, all types of stretching routines.

TMI for me, but like that niche is already occupied in Manhattan. But I like Manhattan, Minchew. imagine him with that coaching staff how likable Detroit would be. It's so scary how likable they'd be. I mean, they might actually naps them out of state fans. And shout out to Brian. He just texted me and said, Motor City, Menshew.

That's a layup. I mean, like, yeah, dude, this guy's got nicknames no matter where he goes. Is Atlanta on the dock for him maybe going? Magic City, Monsu. Let's just see how far would he go in this. I think the first like five, six years of a quarterback's career, you have an opportunity to carve out what you're going to be. And, you know, I think for him, he still wants to be a starting quarterback in this league, not just a bridge guy and definitely not a number two. I don't see him as a clipboard guy in this league.

I see him as a guy that, you know, can have a Fitzpatrick type run. Now the question is when it comes to sticking a certain place, are you there at the right place, right time, right, right, right, rock. to accentuate your talents and catapult you into maybe a second contract with that team. Nate, did you enjoy your time in Jacksonville? I did enjoy my time in Jacksonville, believe it or not. It was a huge just culture difference from the New York locker room to that locker room, like not taking away from either locker room, but it was just, it was just a huge difference. And the temperature was a lot different getting down there in the Florida sun.

It was different. Yeah, well, you said something about the weather that caught my attention. I feel like it's a really good climate for somebody with hair down to their shoulders and Gardner Minch who just got rid of his healthy mullet. Like, that's one thing that makes no sense to me. I've been with him on everything until he chopped that bad boy. It's probably because of how humid it gets, bro. It gets super, super humid down in Jacksonville.

And you've got a wet door mat on the back of your neck. Yeah, his helmet probably feels a lot better without all that. extra hair. Best and worst mascots, guys. I think the Saints mascot, Sir Saint, you know, the guy with the huge chin and the dog that runs around with him, is kind of creepy.

I know that Saints fans are really passionate people. You don't have to be passionate about this mascot. I think the Dallas Cowboys mascot, Rowdy is extremely creepy, like nightmare fuel. And I think Poe, Poe is, of course, Edgar Allen Poe's name to me.

The Ravens mascot. Get that fucking thing away from me, dude. Whoa, whoa, the Tennessee Titans. Their mascot's name is T-Rack. Anyway, what is he? Is this a...

Scroll up. Is this a dog? It's a raccoon. What the hell? Yo, T-Rac just looks like a minor league mascot, dude. There's no, you know... But what does the raccoon have to do anything

with the Tennessee or the Titans? You're absolutely right. Like, the fucking... dolphins have a creepy looking dolphin just to stick with the mascot, right? You have to. But that's what I'm saying. It looks so minor league baseball because they just basically picked, you know, spun the

bottle with marsupials. Maybe it has something to do with marketing. Like maybe like a raccoon is like way marketable than like, I don't know. I guess like just like a titan isn't like a titan the person? Can't you just like put like some type of like? I would think you could just put somebody on stilts like in some big guy outfit. And boom, you've got a Titan. But I don't know why Tennessee Titan in my head.

I feel like their mascot would look like Poseidon or something like that. Yeah, well, dude, like listen, I just, you said that it might be more marketable. You thinking they're having like focus groups and coming out like finishing eating like, yeah, Raccoon would really play. A raccoon. For a market like Tennessee, absolutely. I definitely do because I just don't see why like unless like maybe Tennessee is like is Raccoon. a big like staple in Tennessee?

Do they like hunt them out there? I think raccoons are a staple anywhere there's a fucking back porch, dude. And I feel like there's a lot of back porches in Tennessee. But all I'm saying is this doesn't look like a fucking raccoon, dude. This doesn't even look like a raccoon. So you've totally jumped the shark with this mascot. Yeah.

Totally jumped the shark. I'm looking at all the mascots. They've tried valiantly to keep the mascot consistent with the name of the team, except for the Tennessee Titans. Except for the Titans. I mean, even Buffalo, Billy Buffalo, like, I mean, you can't get any more generic than that. I mean, even the Chargers gave it a good college try with Bolt Man. I mean, I know this is PMT's corner because they've fetishized this fucking, this, this Bolt Man.

But, I mean, this guy is unreal. I mean, it's nightmare. But at least they tried. That Patriot looks like Quagmire from. Family guy. Giggedy. Giggedy. Pat Patriot.

Saw him without his mask. That's my claim of fame up in New England. Really? Yeah, I went in and take a leak, and there he was. It was awkward as hell. I thought you were more happy about knowing the cabman that fell off the horse here. No, that's my boy. Kim, you know, a couple years back,

Kim fell off the horse at Virginia. I mean, he's mounted that steed, thousands of times and it's just one time it goes wrong all of a sudden people want to get their jokes off did you see the sooner's wagon tip over i mean we talked about that in this shows infancy that's like one of the first i mean so who's who's who's really a joke like you have multiple horses and a wagon and you tip over like there's a lot of college mascots that are kind of crazy like the the is it boulder colorado like when they just they have the buffaloes out there like pulling them around and stuff yeah they have to sprint beside the buffaloes this guys

that do that they have to run like a sub four five or sub four six 40 like that's really like yo bro it's it's the craziest thing like if you ever watch it like i remember watching it one time and just like really thinking about it and being like yo they're really running next to a buffalo like with a stadium full of people with the animal like there's about 10 people i feel like with ropes controlling this this animal but any moment it could be just bad news bad news bad news Okay, I got a question for you like what what would your mascot be if you had to make a mascot? Oh, if I could make a college football team Would you would you choose it would you choose to use an animal or like what what were you what were you to be? I love mine mine right now would be

It'll probably be like some type of cryptocurrency Keep it keep it current like a Bitcoin sign The Bitcoin ballers and everybody would make a fuck ton of money on your team and then you you corner the market. You already know. Sabin's just buying kids left and right, but Elon Musk is paying all your kids to advertise for cryptocurrency. That's it. That's a genius idea, Dr. Fax. And yes, I can fix any mascot. Go ahead. Spin the bottle. We'll do another mascot. The Delta State University's mascot, the fighting okras, fix that. When kids, and there are so many that wait eons to meet the fighting okra when they finally get to the big delta state opener and see the real okra and see the

uninspiring shade of green i think they're underwhelmed i think it needs a new coat of paint how about wichita state wooshawk is their mascot wichita state shockers a big bad bundle of wheat the only thing i can do about this mascot because you can't fix the facial expression facial expression is 100% axe murderer. You have to give it a haircut. The haircut gives it an instability that's just insidious. The Orlando Magic's mascot is called Stuff. That is his name, S-T-U-F-F-F- Stuff.

Stuff the Magic Dragon. Oh, Stuff the Magic Dragon. I don't want to fix this mascot. I think this is kid-friendly. I think it's cool. There's a basketball element. Keep it. Yeah, and he bought out the dunk contest for Aaron Gordon a few years. I remember that.

Yeah, shout out to stuff. Southern Illinois, the Salukes. It's an ancient Egyptian hunting dog. It's actually a cool name. Because the region that the school competes in is known as Little Egypt. Why would you call anything in Illinois little Egypt? Here's how you fix this dog. You euthanize it.

The only way to fix this mascot is to put it down. I'm not talking about the real dog. I'm talking about the mascot in the suit. It looks like if Stephen King made a fucking movie about a dog in space, and you got trapped on a planet with them, and you were expecting like an alien, and this thing came out and you were like, even worse. Okay?

Look at this motherfucker, dude. Oh, he bit you? No, he just brushed up against me. No, I think I see a bite mark. Like negative encounter. Negative encounter. There it is. Oh, goodness.

Did you just have a negative encounter with this a luki mascot? Take it to the vet. Hey, the mascot thing's fun. I know you haven't done it. You want to try one? Please. The Columbus Blue Jackets mascot, Stinger. Let's check him out.

He's a green hornet. I hate everything about him. He's 6.9 inch bright green mascot of the Columbus Blue Jackets. He's a yellow jacket who was originally yellow and had been mixed with the team's blue and green with red eyes. Was this a bug, an insect? Stinger, it's a bee. Yeah, dog, the jackets. Yeah, but it's clearly not the color of a bee.

The cowboy just explained that. No, I know. To make matters worse, I was looking as he was explaining, it looks coked up. I mean, this mascot is on the coccina. Cocayana. Look, grind in his teeth. Isn't that what you guys do when you put that white stuff up your nose? You grind your teeth, your eyes get all buggy.

It's exactly what this thing looks like. Mascouts awful. Next. Gunnersaurus. he's the Arsenal Gunner's mascot it's a big dinosaur oh see this is pretty cool now

you like this I like the cut of his jib yeah nice shape to him I don't mind him either that's kid friendly that's got kid friendly written all over it of course what kind of dinosaurs that make

that is uh Sarasops it's a it's a T nah it's um oh oh oh

I'm yeah tip of my tongue it's a it's a ticeratops it's a bronosaurus if I'm not mistaken the long neck gives it away yeah we got no problem

with this mascot the Syracuse orange looks like a 1990 mascot it needs an update ooh couldn't disagree more cowboy iconic perfect don't touch a thing cowboy go on though

this is good this is good you hate the mascot that everybody likes That's good content. Talk to me about why you hate the mascot. It does look like they don't clean the mascot enough. Like it sits literally under the bleachers. Yeah.

And it just looks like the same thing. It hasn't gotten an update since probably it's an inception. Neither has like the peanut butter sandwich. There's just some things that shouldn't change, dude. Like this thing is, this is an icon in my book. Yeah, it's auto. The hat, I take issue with the hat. They've updated the hat to,

the big block ass yeah that big dog shit block ass this is what you do you do you make it one of those inflatable big orange inflatable things

you can run around it has a nice solid outside outside shape and then it can swallow the cheerleaders you know it does that you know the Washington

National it goes around and swallow some of the it swallows some of the cheerleaders not to rain on your parade here, but Syracuse already has that. I went to a Syracuse basketball game and the orange mascot swallowed one of the cheerily inflatable version of it. No, that's good for Reed.

That means Reed's like somebody in the boardroom. Wow, Reed, you're a visionary and you have a bad take on, in my opinion, a very classic mascot. All right, so we didn't do good, bad, ugly today. Let's close the show with some good, bad, ugly. Let's just speed through it and get people out the door. My good is the Seattle Crackens expansion draft, notably Beast Mode announcing the number one pick. I mean, talk about the coolest guy in the world who just does not care about prep because he can figure his way around anything.

Kat's name is Callie Yarncroke. They picked him up from your Nashville Predators, not to be confused with the Buffalo Sabres. And Beast Mode looks at the piece of paper and says, this. This is the first pick, right? Yeah, with the first pick, we're going with the boy boy, Cali, though.

You know what I'm talking about? Yonkoy. Callie Yarncrow. You just heard it. Callie Yonko. To the back in from Beast Mode himself. Thank you so much, as always. Appreciate you.

Hey, and look, Cali, if I didn't pronounce it right, tap in with me and let me know how to do it the right way, big dog. You heard it from him. straight up. Reverent him directly. Going with the boy boy, Calido. Brilliant.

My favorite part about that audio, and I haven't seen the video, is that whoever was doing that event with him, was holding out a DAP for like three seconds, because I could hear him say, don't leave me hanging. And then DAP came like three seconds later. Marshall was going to get his point across,

and then DAP as he finished. You're so good to bring this up because, yes, he's leaving the guy hanging, not on purpose. He didn't see it. But then he seamlessly picks him up as he continues to talk. He's just, he's a, he's amazing. He's a unicorn, man. Marchand's a unicorn.

There's just nobody that, like I always say this, the guy literally sat at his locker and said, I have nothing to gain talking to you guys. Right. Which is usually a death sentence in the media. And when it comes to making money outside of football, but he has made a truckload of, money outside of football. And now, like, people are booking him to do NHL drafts, bar mitzvahs,

like the whole nine yards. Um, so good for Marchand. And the thing about that whole thing, I think you mentioned this was the Sean Kemp shirt. I mean, Sean probably said, I need a triple X. They said we got a medium. You're obligated to wear some crack in gear. And he was in a, he was in a spot. Yeah. And, and, and teams put players in that spot. Businesses put players in that spot, like with regularity. I can't tell you how many times I showed up to a charity of that or, you know, to lend my, I don't know, likeness to something. And they bust out the shmedium. And it's very unforgiving. They're usually dry fit. I don't know what got into people. When you go to a corporate event or you do something like Sean Kemp did, they either give you

a 5x gilden that's stiff as a fucking piece of cardboard or they, give you like an underarmor Smedium that only making Gunner looks good in. Well, right. Thank you for bringing that up because I've been in the studio wearing a 2x win bet dry fit happily

with pride. And if you are listening, Wimbet, if you could throw a Schmedium this way, it would be greatly appreciated. I just noticed we had a Wimbet helmet over your right shoulder. Yeah, dog. There's a win bet football in here now, Wimbet basketball, helmet. There's a

Banner somewhere, we're rolling. There's a beanie behind me too, Winbet. You want a bad? Yeah, give me a bad. Because of your bloviating, you can look that up as I talk. Yeah, I know what it means. I don't need to look it up. About Ted Lasso.

I thought season two was already out, so I re-upped a seven-day Apple Plus trial after seven days. I'm going to know them $4.99. And I did it on Tuesday night. So I'm going to have like three days to get through this Ted Lasso, or else I'm charged $499. And now money's funny because like lunch these days costs $15. Are you aware of this?

You can't get a lunch. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't get a lunch for less than $15. Sometimes lunch is $20. So oat milk latte, five chickens, I'll plunk down five chickens for an oat milk latte faster than you can say Worcester Mass. But when Apple Plus says they want $4.99 for a month. programming, I feel played, I feel used, I feel taken advantage of. So now I'm in a spot where either I have to binge the F out of Ted Lasso in two to three days,

or I'm $4.99 poorer because of you and because of my inability to read the screen that says premieres Friday. Listen, I just want to say this. I don't think I've been bloviating. I've just been giving my opinion on a preview that looks objectively not great. You even admitted that I'm probably not going to like the show. I've made great efforts this week to watch the show. We sat down in the chair today to shoot the pod, and I said what?

Hold up. I'm going to start watching Ted Lasso. Yeah. And you said what? I think I said something to the effect of, are you fucking serious? Yeah, which is, you know, like you just, that would have been good for the pod, but I couldn't get to it because my co-host wouldn't let me watch the show. So I tried.

I tried to watch Ted Lassow. I tried to sign into it. Didn't have any sign in information. Read send me to sign in information. Thank you, Reed. Now I know the passwords to all your shit. Unfortunately, you know the passwords to all my shit. But I really gave it the good college try this week.

I promise I will watch Ted Lassow soon. I tried to watch it. My co-host wouldn't let me. Let me piggyback off my bad with a very similar bad. Last night, I thought I was in my own Amazon Prime interface. I was not. I was operating my mother-in-law's Amazon Prime account.

And I got hit with a $7.99, which of course is going to my mother-in-law, because I subscribed to PBS masterpiece through Prime because A, I'm an idiot. And B, I wanted to watch a new period piece set in 1930s, England, about James Harriet's Adventures as a vet veterinarian. And I'll keep you posted on that review as well. I think they just did terrible things to animals. So far so good. Like helping out animals left and right.

People stunk. They were doing impromptu amputations. Like it's just like the dog had, you know, an upset stomach and they were just shooting the dog. Yeah. Hey, I don't appreciate your castigation when it came to, uh, to me being the reason that you fucked up the payment method. I don't think it was my fault at all. I think it was your fault. I think we're both to blame for the fact that we have an A Ted Lassau content, but we'll be back

with some, we're going to do some soccer. We're going to do some Sudecass. We're going to do some soccer. Hey, you know, I had a lot of people hit me up after I said last week. I think just in a very polite way, I thought maybe my first instinct, and I could be wrong is that the show was miscast. I said, I just don't buy them as being Southern. And everybody was like, hey, man, Hey boss, like link me an article to Jason Sadekis is from Kansas City. Wait, where are you considering Kansas City, the South guys? I know that he has an accent. I understand that.

And I understand that he moved to Virginia when he was a kid, but I don't consider myself from the South. Okay. Let's take this one at a time. Where is he supposed to be from in the show? Is that known? I don't know, but the accent doesn't sound like Missouri to me. And I could be wrong about Missouri accents. I mean, I was only, when he comes to England to coach a show,

which tall state. Exactly. He's supposed to be coaching which is tall state. Now, it doesn't mean he's a local. Yeah. Now, where was his fucking, you know, because our buddy, Mike Leach is from, is from Wyoming. And he's down there jerking a cowbell around and saying y'all. I mean, coaches don't automatically adopt the accents of the places that they, they coach.

I'm wondering where Sadecas's character was supposed to be. I'm not wondering that myself. Tune in next week. No, I'm just going to look at it up myself here. He's from, he led the Wichita State Shockers to Division II National Collegiate Athletic Association Championship. He is hired to coach AFC Richmond, an association football team, a folksie American. He is seen as unsophisticated, but is smarter than he looks. I mean, come on.

Like, I just, it really comes through in the preview, guys. Really nicely done. He loves the coach and cares more about people than wins. Got it. Got the whole show now. You got any ugly here? Yeah, I body shamed Big Ben on Twitter. I didn't feel good about it as I was typing it.

As I was sending it, I don't feel good in the aftermath. I think I'll probably take it down because I'm just not a mean person, IRL or on the internet. But I'm slowly becoming something I don't like because of this podcast. really. Y'all take care.