Green Light with Chris Long - Jason Kelce! Malt Liquor Blind Taste Test With Chris And 'Hurricane' Round Q&A. Aaron Stinnie! Bucs Guard On SB LV.

Episode Date: February 12, 2021

(01:00) - Welcome, Bucs SB Parade and Ranking Tom Brady's Most Enjoyed SBs. (46:10) - Super Bowl Winner Aaron Stinnie on Tom Brady's Parade Day, Playing Aaron Donald and Chris Jones and Being Teammates with Tristan Wirfs and Ryan Jensen. (1:01:36) - Malt Liquor 40 Taste Test with Jason Kelce. (1:16:11) - 'Hurricane' Round Q&A with Kelce. Sign up for your DraftKings account at https://www.draftkings.com/sportsbook and use promo code : Greenlight Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh, that's 211, that's 211. That's 211. That's 2.11. That's fucking 211. That tastes like blackout. Man, I've never had hurricane, but I think that it's definitely not one of the ice is. It's definitely not cold 45. I feel like I can't just keep matching it, but I feel like that's still reserved.

This is incredible. Yeah, it's a steel reserve, dude. Happy Friday, everybody. Oh, shit. I forgot again. Yeah, what to say. Yeah. You just wish everybody well?

I wish everybody well. I wish everybody well from the middle of Virginia. From the middle of Virginia where pretty soon we're going to be able to open up dispensaries. From the bottom of my heart in the middle of Virginia. Yeah. Talk to me about dispensaries. A couple years from now I'm thinking we can do that here. You had a great idea.

We opened a dispensary. I feel like dispensaries were legal and even were not. are probably doing pretty well. Probably, and we kind of have a natural branding situation. Greenlight. First podcast dispensary come in 2024. Oh, so it's like Greenlight podcast and dispensary. Yeah, we do live shows there.

There's music, but more so it's just our voices, like constantly as you're shopping for cannabis. Well, maybe in the back, maybe it's like Greenlight, podcast, dispensary, fitness and wellness. We get like a couple ellipticals back there. And there's child care. Yes. So you can do the bowflex, grab some cannabis,

your kids are back there. Kids are in a ball pit. Yep. Nice. Do you think ballpits are coming back? Never, ever. I was thinking about that today actually, because there's this place in Charlottesville, I really hope, comes back. It's called jump. Right. Remember that? I haven't been, but I've seen all of y'all persons in your in your children's are always at this place jumping off trampolines and end of

styrofoam pits the trampoline parks i mean if not for the pandemic we're going to take over the world i mean think about it how many movie theaters went under and how many giant square buildings did they leave in their wake right bowling alleys can i interest you in a ball that dozens have touched maybe some shoes that have been heavily used. Maybe some pizza on the way out. Yeah. I mean, it's an amazing concept. I hope they're back.

I hope like all that shit's back. You know that machine with the claw you put in 25 cents? I have given a small fortune to that machine. I don't think I've ever picked anything out of there. I'm pretty sure it's just a joke. It's just the troll job. It is a joke. Okay.

That's good to know. Because our local bowling alley had one of those right inside the front door. the fucking claws they can take my strong hand with the rat like the rabbits like hanging on and then it just drops it right like i don't care i'll take whatever he got in there but it's just never it's not a thing dispensary 2024 green light is that how long it's going to take around that to be able to like sling it maybe let's buy a commercial space this year and start getting ready i like that who's going to be a real estate agent i will be the agent good It's good.

I'll take a bit of a break on the commission and I will be the agent. Yeah. Appreciate that. You know, I want to take that back. Not going to take a break on the commission. Oh, wow. But my fiduciary responsibility

will be as strong as it's ever been. Equity in said dispensary is going to be hard to come by. I'm just going to come out and say that right now. My, no, we're partners. Yeah, but not if you charge me the, the, uh, the, the, the, the, the, eight percent that you charge people. Kahn, six, cutting half three. It's really nothing. What's the difference? What do you people really do?

Oh, how much time do you have? Not a lot because we got a great show lined up ahead of us. We, that was going to be rough hearing you talk about all the paperwork you do to get six percent of a million dollar home. I don't, I don't get the six percent, all right? You split it. Got it. Do you split it? The firm gets three percent. Oh, no. And when you're left with your crumbs, buying a redacted Grand Cherokee, riding around with other people's money, making home buying easy, buying SUVs with your money. Other people's homes, you son of a bitch.

I earn my money. We got a pack show ahead of us. We have... You're fired as a client. You're fired. I rise and grind every day in my life. Well, I'm going to go shop at... Thinking about you and your family and your happiness.

I'm going to go shop at... for homes. Yeah, that is the name of a company. Yeah, and I'll be shopping there. Anyways, we've got Aaron Stinney, guard, hero, all-round great guy,

Charlottesville native, and now a Super Bowl champ. Remember the Tampa Bay Buccaneers? Hey, how was your day at work? Oh, nothing. Just came to work and didn't break a sweat until somebody got hurt and I had to block Aaron Donald out of the blue

like week 12 of the NFL season or whenever it was. that's been this kid's trajectory towards starting in the Super Bowl. He stepped in beautifully. He did a nice job on Sunday. And we, of course, front of the line guys being from Charlottesville,

per capita, so many champions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, started three games, divisional round, championship round, Super Bowl. Yeah, how about that? In front of the goat,

Tom Brady. I just want to give you a heads up. We are going to talk about Tom Brady some more in the middle of the pod. Some more. Yeah. Get your graham crackers. Get your gram crackers out because we're going to be talking about some more Tom Brady. And curl up next to the fire and listen to us rank which Super Bowls he probably liked the best, which is low-hanging fruit.

But the great thing about it is we can't be proven wrong because Tom's never going to say which one he likes the best. Here's a question. Yeah. Do you have digits for Tom Brady? I think I do. But it's one of those things I actually communicate with him via DM. He shot me a really nice DM after I retired. Real talk.

For me, I was like, I already knew this guy was a great teammate, but God damn. I mean, like, I'm a blip on the radar on, you know, the story of his career. Like, he shot me a DM when I retired. That is nice. Really nice. I DM them two weeks ago and he DM back. What if all this time it's his social team? Probably.

That wrote me a heartfelt good, like, what if I saw Tom? Because I did see Tom and he's always cool, man. Like I saw him at the Super Bowl two years ago and he like came up, dabble. hug, Giselle, Giselle, this is Chris. He said, hey, I love this guy, is what he said. And I was like, he loves me.

Nice to meet you. Yeah, if he said that, that's what he said the first time I met it. But I do think he's writing me Dioves. I do, I do. And I think at one point he shot the digits in there, but for me to hit up Tom Brady, I could be wrong.

Maybe he didn't shoot the digits in there because it doesn't matter. I'm not using them. It's like when I said when I'm going to New England, it's like, I kind of just, you don't expect you're going to run to Tom at a bar. You know, Tom goes home, tends to his lovely family, and puts a bunch of electrodes all

over his body in a green room and throws footballs. That's what I imagine he does. And then like floats in a salt tank all night. And in the event he does throw a few back, he's got a guy with him to hold him upright. And boy, did that guy hold him up right. I was like, he was a high school kid drunk, dude. So Tom Brady's finally gone to college. It's essentially what happened.

You know, like he's finally out in the world. untethered. Yeah, good for him. So we're gonna talk about that, like where, because people say when you see that video, Tom Brady's having the most fun of all time, well, not today he's not, because he probably has a wicked hangover,

as they say up north. I don't think because he got the drunkest and because the situation seen the loosest culturally within the team, that he automatically is having more fun, will sift through that. The seven titles, which one did he enjoy? the most. Which ride did he enjoy the most? We'll sift through that. And then we've got Jason Kelsey

of the Philadelphia Eagles. Somebody who's beat Tom Brady. We're doing a blind taste test on 2-11. February 11th. Do you know what the significance of that is? One of the, uh, I think it might either be a brand or some sort of flavor of malt liquor. It's a flavor and a brand. I mean, because the flavor is unmistakable. We'll see how unmistakable it is because Steel Reserve is one of the 40s we will be blind taste testing. Is Hurricane in the game? It's got to be. Hurricane, you know, is my all-time favorite, followed by OE. Yeah.

So I hope I get those right. You wanted to talk about Marty Schottenheimer's. Obit, yeah, the Washington Post. What was up with that? Wasn't so nice. You've all seen it by now, but Schadenheimer. I don't know if they've all seen it. Okay, Schadenheimer, whose teams wilted in the postseason, dies at 77.

That was the obituary from those clowns up there. So I don't know if that's a guy scorned by a lost wager on the chiefs. Presumably in the playoffs. Back in the day who said, hey, when this guy dies, I'm going to get my pound of flesh. Like, what are you doing? I have no idea. I don't even, I don't see the angle at all. Especially when you take it down because it's such a proudly asinine headline that the editor, which is usually how it goes, the editor picks that and, right? I mean, a lot of people were like, kill this writer. I was like, well, maybe, but also the editor.

And when I think of Marty Schottenheimer, I don't think of, oh, right, the coach whose team's always lost in the playoffs. I mean, listen. I think of good football coach. Listen, great football coach who was in the playoffs a lot. You know there's a lot of great football coaches who never won a Super Bowl. So perhaps Schottenheimer, comma, good football coach. Legendary football coach, I'd probably put him in the legendary category. Sure, comma, passes away, sadly.

So rest in peace, amazing man, amazing football coach, terrible obituary. I said this week, my wish for those dudes that wrote the obituaries that they live long, happy, healthy lives. But when that time comes that somebody just writes the most dog shit obituary of all. all time. At least a headline, yeah. Just a picture of a piece of dog pill. I've come up with a few for you. In the spirit of bad obituary headlines.

Yeah. You ready? Bring it. Long, comma. Brother of three-time pro bowler, comma, dies. I got one for you. Okay. Gunter, comma, guy who got drunk and slept on a park bench in 2000.

all night long, sold real estate, dies of old age. I didn't do the commas. Park bench, huh? Yeah, you remember that? By the pavilion. Yeah. By the outdoor concert hall. I think it'd be hard pressed to find a bench by there, but I'm not going to, that's ancient history.

It's kind of up the hill from there. It wasn't, do you remember that night? Yeah, I remember that night. I remember all the times like it's not for the Pro Bowl. I mean, so don't get weird about the park bench. drug addicted podcaster long dies that's amazing that's amazing

I got a couple more I got another one making gunner comma who ballooned to 220 pounds in 2006 comma died of old age I like how you get me to old age at least well I just want to will that to happen

yeah rather not okay I gained a little weight long runs out of gas for final time comma dies former football player who evaded taxes and publicity stunt dies

oh that's funny I just got it that's amazing did uh did Tommy Lauren write that no it was the knockoff Britt McKenry did she write that that's the dollar store Tommy Lauren you got it to you all can Google that

to be clear Chris Chris never did that well Well, I mean, maybe not on purpose. Not on purpose. And finally, this is just a cute one. And sorry, this doesn't involve old age. Long story, cut short. Well, I mean, you know, I plan on living to 150, so it could be cut short.

I mean, 117. I saw there's a 117-year-old woman out there right now. That's right. Yeah, that could be us. Probably will be. Arby's. So Arby's. I got this big meat suit.

It's got cold cuts all over it. It's got like ham and roast beef on my shoulder. And I posted a video thinking that everybody would know what it was. And a few people were like, I don't really like the hat. It's like, Jesus Christ. But I thought I was the only one, right? You get a sweatsuit, big roast beef has been flirting with me for months now. It feels like in my DMs sending me gifts, showering me with gifts.

Who says chivalry's not dead? So I don the meat suit. I post a video all excited. It's just me. Later that day I find out, somebody tags me, he's like, is that the Pat McAfee meat suit?

I said, excuse me? I don't consume his content. So I went over and Google Pat McAfee and Arby's. No. Oh yeah, they had a fling. Wow.

They're still kind of having a fling. So I ignore it because that would be embarrassing at this point. I got one other content maker who's, albeit an industry titan showing me up. I said maybe nobody will notice. Next thing I know, somebody on the Howard Stern show has a meat suit.

Dragonfly Jones has a meat suit. See it on his Twitter. He doesn't even know that I have a meat suit. So what I realize is Arby's has been playing all of us. Arby's is a slut. I don't know if we could say that word on this podcast. Can we say that word? I think so.

In fact, I was about to call Arby's an ignorant slut. We still love their food. I'm just not going to be walking around wearing the meat suit like I'm the only one when other dudes have the meat suit. Now, TBF, did you expect like this was one of one? No, I just thought maybe that there was some semblance of monogamy in the roast beef industry. So I found a rebound chick.

Oh. Lions choice. But they're more than a rebound chick. They're a homegrown corn fed St. Louis. roast beef establishment. Hasn't been outside the 3-14, not out trying to send meat suits out. They got nice, classy polos and ball caps,

like golf, you know, golf hat-shaped ball caps, like grown up. Like a hat is what you're looking for? Yeah, not like a fucking trucker hat or something. You know, send that shit over to some other podcast. Lions Choice is going to send us some gear and more. So we're in the game with Lions Choice.

Just as a heads up, We appreciate that. Oh, they got a black bean soup that looks to die for. Arby's might be a lot of fun, but you're not the only one. Do you know why it's called Arby's? Why? Do you not know? Oh, I don't know.

Oh. Yeah, tell me. Awesome. R.B. Roast beef. Arbys. Swear for God. Here's the funniest part about that Arby's story.

So I message Mina to tell her because if you know Mina Kimes is, the challenge she's going through is she's been trying to secure a brand sponsorship partnership with Spindriff like thirsty she's legitimately thirsty with her pursuit of corporate sponsorships so i was updating her on mine um and she goes oh my god you're like the hey guys spoiler alert the next 20 seconds here you're like the guy and her you're like wakeney phoenix and her that realized that AI is is with 10,000 of other men. Oh no. Yeah, never seen the movie as the double whammy and I've been saving it for the better part of however long it's been out. Me too. So I got the movie spoiled, found out that Arby's

was cheating on me and now we're on the lion's choice. Good for you. That's a great move. By local. I have a gift for you. Oh, thank you. Yeah, remember that time you got me body wash. I got you body wash. I got you a picture of your retirement party. I got you a lot of things. Let me slide this under the... Mine tell me what it is first. I think we found the official body wash of the green light pod. This is a momentous occasion.

I wanted to clue you in on it and plug you in on the conversation, but have a smell. Not through the face shield. Got to go under. Very intense smelling. Intense, please. This is a classy body wash.

This isn't like some axe. Bro, mine was Dove Men Plus Care. Yeah, well, you're a minimalist. This smells very good. This is a level above dove plus men care in an ambitious scent. He knows how to say it. The good people at Dove Men Plus Care. Don't worry about that.

This is Method Men, Cedar and something. Fuck, if I'm going to make it the official. The rapper. I knew you'd ask that, which is interesting. This is intoxicating. Smells great. Doesn't it? Yeah.

Method men. And I'll tell you what I did here. Method Men's cedar. Why on earth is it in a tiny glass jar? Because that's usually what I put my marijuana in. So I'm going to need that back. So after you use that body wash, I'm going to need that back. Did you give it a rinse?

Yeah, it's a clean jar. Hasn't been used actually. Method men's cedar and cypress has a ring to it. Isn't that what it smells like? I can't stop smelling it. How did you decide on the 1.2 ounces to pour in here? Well, I need the rest of it. big body

big body bends over here I need a lot of body wash and also I'll tell you what I did that's a hybrid poured some shampoo in there too I've gone full cedar cypress I'm the guy that wears the body wash and the matching shampoo

now so now you're going to have me put shampoo on my body well that's what you had me do the time you gave me shampoo in a body wash can do you remember the details of your gift was a two and one? It was just shampoo in a body wash thing

because there was a controversy about me using it on my person. Hmm, I'll have to go back at the table. I think that was pure body wash. You think, Cowboy Reid, do you remember? I don't remember, but I would like to know where you got the Method Men because there does happen to be a Method men

body wash bottle down in the down-center shower. Really? That belongs to me. Oh, shit. You used this shit? Yeah, dude. Isn't it the best? Yeah, another one.

Hey, let's do the same thing that we did with Hatch. So sick. Oh, yeah, Hatch. Hey, listen, we were on Hatch together. I don't know what the hell you guys are talking about. Hatches, if you were paying attention to what the fuck we say. Hatch is a sensational sound machine, nightlight, extraordinaire. Turns all different colors.

I like sound machines. It helps you wake up in the morning. It gives you nice, bright. Birds chirping. Birds chirping. In your case, train whistling. So it sounds like, you know, the side of your best. backyard. Hey, Haas, I got bad news for you. The train whistles at your home. It's a lot closer to your house, though. It just rumbles. No, it glides. It glides, please. Lovely infant sleeping through that train. Yeah, she is, in fact. That's good. Yeah. Yeah, men's body wash. Cedar and Cyprus, Method men. Method men is not the rapper. He's Method man. You got it. And, oh, wow, look, $7.00.

for this bottle. You probably gave me six cents worth here. That's nice. That's more than six cents. Held it in there for a solid three seconds. He was dead the whole time. Who? Well, when we kept saying six cents. Oh, six cents. Yeah, that's funny.

And I haven't seen it. That is funny. Use that, though. Hey, and if you're out there, get some method men. We're not getting paid. They're just now the official body wash of the greenlight pot. And you can smell like a moderately successful podcaster, a moderately successful podcaster, a moderately successful podcast producer, extraordinaire. Like, Reed, what else do you do that you can tell the people that you do that they can smell like you?

I don't know if anybody wants to smell like me, but, uh, that wasn't the question. What else do you do? What do you do outside here? Reed is, he spends a lot of time here. Outside of here. Like, you let him outside here. He does go outside of here a lot, dude. Guys, guys, the grind king.

He is a grind king, dude. Uh, Gruden's grinder right here. Yes. Big time, Gruden's grinder. Who smells like a fucking forest. All right. Forest is accurate. Yeah, it's such a great smell.

You know what? I missed that brown speed stick. Never could use the speed stick because it would make my underarms break out. I have very sensitive skin. Same problem? Yeah. Like painful. Yeah.

That brown one, musk, it's one of the best, best scents ever known to man. We're going to do a scent ranking next week. Okay. How's that? How's that? That sounds like a good idea. How's that smell? Yeah, I smell what you're stepping in.

Let's talk about football, because Brady had fun this week. Got drunk. He got fucking, he got flipping hand-boned. And everybody saw the video. So I think the low-hanging fruit that, again, we can't be proven wrong on because Brady's never going to rank the Super Bowls is which ones did he have the most fun winning? I'm ranking it based on not only the Super Bowl, but the ride, obviously, the year what it entail. Because, listen, you know, I got a chance to be a part of two.

They're very different, and people ask, which one do you like better? Well, I had probably the Eagles because, you know, I was a bigger part of it. And, you know, like, we're the first one in the city. So that's not to say New England wasn't better than any drug you could ever try. Like, it just was a different ride. And like, so for me as a player, being in one point, place that year being in another place the next year. They're different runs. One's more of a relief. You know, you're fresh off of getting released, being on bad team for a long time. It's like,

will you ever win? So it just allowed you to keep going because had you lost that one, maybe you don't play anymore. The Eagles one was more fun. You know, it was just the whole year was just a ride. So it depends on, it depends on kind of where you are in your career, what's going on around you, the context, the run. I'll say this, putting it in context, I think Super Bowl 53 against the Rams is probably his least favorite. And again, 13 to 3. Yeah, 13 to 3.

I felt like at this point the relationships had started to strain about then. You know, so that factors in for me. It felt like a business. It also felt like rebounding, you know, because what preceded that was obviously our Super Bowl. where we beat them. And getting beat by Nick Foles, being older, the whispers of, are you done, even though you just threw for like 600 yards

on the Super Bowl that you lost? 13 points, that's what they mustered in that game to win. It was a defensive championship. Really only made one big, like big throw that you remember in that game. Do you remember any of the big throws in that game off top of your head? Rams game.

Yeah. No. Gronk. You know, Gronk down the left side line. I think was just about it. I mean, you were sleeping the entire game. You woke up because people made noise down the stadium. I was there.

That was the signature throw. And it was a very Patriots run. I mean, they bullied the Chargers. They got the run game going. So even though Brady had an incredibly efficient day, I think you threw for like 350, you remember them running the Chargers out of the building on the ground.

And then they go on the road. And I think that win in Kansas City was probably the highlight of that season. I mean, the Super Bowl is the highlight, but the energy, beating those guys. I don't think they'd ever say it publicly, but staring the Rams down after that PI call,

or lack thereof, I think they knew they had it. And I think they knew they had the game plan defensively to do what they had to do. So, I mean, Kansas City thing, you had the lucky moment with D. Ford, which we talked about a lot here, the neutral zone that negated a pick.

This to me, this was an interesting Super Bowl because it was the quintessential patriots reminding us that they have a death grip on football at the time. Still, you think they're dead, right? They lose to a backup in Nick Foles. The next year, I'm sitting there in a locker room in Philly trying to repeat. So I'm sitting there in a locker room

with head coaches, assistant coaches, the entire football building, the culture in Philly is. Every time a team takes some success, they all just repeat the same thing. It's a new year. We're not gonna be the team that blah, blah, blah. It's the hardest thing in sports is to repeat, blah, blah, blah.

But the whole time you're doing that, you're talking about last year in a sense. So teams don't know how to get over the last year because they turn it into a self-fulfilling prophecy. You know, like if you just say, let's bust our ass and you show up and we handle business that way and we don't acknowledge the elephant in the room,

we just work. That's kind of the way that in retrospect, I feel like New England probably and the reason they've been good for so long or were good for so long is they had it down on how to continue their success, how to add to it, how to retool. I don't think like teams when they win the first one

know how to do that. And so we're sitting there in 2018 and we're like damn, at one point we're four and six. You know, we ended up at the doorsteps to the NFC championship, but we're saying, golly dude, at the end of the year with what we just went through and how hard it was just proven to be to repeat,

saw it firsthand, New England, And it's also very hard to play in that game lose and then muster up the strength to get back up, especially after you've been on two playoff runs that are extremely lengthy, Super Bowl Championship, Atlanta, lost to Philly. This was their reminder that we're just gonna be consistent. We're here, we're gonna win a different way.

You know, we get lucky, you know, a little bit with D Ford, a bunch of conversions in the Kansas City game to Edelman. There was one drive where it was just like, Brady was magic on that drive. Brady to Edelman. and then you win 13 to 3. So they invent new ways to win.

Super Bowl 38, Panthers. They actually missed the playoffs the year before this one. So I don't know if this is six for him, but I would think it was enjoyable, maybe not the most enjoyable. Is that fair? They beat Jake Deloam and the Panthers. I was a Panthers fan, but, you know,

there's not a lot of pizzazz to that. Close, close game. Very close game. Fourth quarter was 19 to 18 in favor of the Panthers. Pat's win by 33229 after going 14 and 2. So I would say, you know, he definitely probably enjoyed the highest scoring fourth quarter in Super Bowl history. At this point, this was kind of his coming out party because the first Super Bowl, it wasn't about him. And we'll get to that in a second.

This was about him. He finished third in the MVP voting, also beat Peyton along the way at this time. their young kids and one's trying to, you know, one up the other. And that's going to be a trend his entire career. But this is where he begins to become a star. And life was probably pretty awesome at this time for Tom Brady. Is it the beehive or the beehive with Beyonce? And is it Beyonce or?

I really want to tell you that it's the beehive. It's the beehive, right? Yeah, sure it is. Beyonce, right? It's the beehive. Yeah. Beehive. Yeah, I just wanted you to walk around calling it the beehive.

Beehive, okay. Beyonce. She, of course, sang the anthem for this. Of course. Pat's Thirds Super Bowl. Trying to start Thurs for the Panthers. A little shorthand, Thurs. You a Thurs fan? Yeah, I love Thurs. I was a Panthers fan for many years and wouldn't nobody. If you said Thurs, you were like a cop. Yeah, that's why I'm starting it now. Keep pounding. Yeah, keep pounding. Go Thurs. Keep pounding. Go Thurs. All right. Super Bowl 39. Eagles. Number five.

In the 60s, you think of Green Bay, in the 70s, the Steelers, in the 80s, the San Francisco 49ers, the Cowboys in the 90s, and the New England Patriots will be the first dynasty of the 21st century. This is when they beat the Eagles, and we were in college. Do you remember who was our college coach? Al Groh.

Al Groh. He loved the Patriots, and he was kicking our fucking ass that year. So I have never hated the Patriots so much in my life. As a fan, as an aside, I remember watching the game, hating their stupid socks because we had to wear those socks. Same pants. Same pants, same uniform, basically. I just didn't want to come into the meeting room on Monday

and be told how fucking perfect the Patriots are by my coach, who I love to death, but at that time, a freshman getting my ass kicked. I remember watching that game and rooting very hard for the Eagles. This was an underrated challenge for them. I'm sure for him, think about it. But this is the last time anybody went back to back. I mean, he's literally the last guy to do it. And for a young kid to go third Super Bowl this early, back to back,

it had to be a lot of fun, had a 103 fever. The night before. It was like his flu game. They won it in Jacksonville, probably not the most fun place to win a Super Bowl, but no offense to Jacksonville people. They're easily offended by Jacksonville. You got that hooters at the landing. I heard it went out of business.

Oh no. Yeah. Damn. Yeah, they say their sails sagged. Hmm. That's brilliant. Yeah. This is where the drought starts for me.

I mean, not for me. This is where the drought starts. And I would call this the curse of Bridget Monaghan. Even Moynihan, maybe. Is it Moynihan? Yeah. No, but I think for the sake of the curse, you just call it the curse of Bridget Monaghan. Okay, that makes more sense.

Yeah. The curse of Britschonahan. Bridget Monaghan, dark-haired women, man. She put a hex on him. So that's like, those are the ones that I'm not sure. They're like back half. They were still fun. Here's my top four.

Okay. You're excited. Super Bowl 51. Toss the white. Coming in it for me. That was a tough, tough decision because, you know, it is coming right on the heels of the deflate gate suspension, right? Like right on the heels of that.

He had to serve that four-game suspension to begin the year. I was there that year. It was weird. but this was the ultimate like fuck you super bowl for him the comeback this is a two year run for him that goes a thousand yards essentially into super bowls five touchdowns one interception i think that one was was fun because the vindictive tom you know there's always some vindictive element to what he's doing but this was the ultimate right and anytime you get five rings you fill up your whole hand so I would put that at four.

Three, I'm going Super Bowl 36 versus the Rams. This is the first one. I would maybe put it higher. I just feel like a lot of successful people when they're looking back, they always say some semblance of, man, I didn't have much in the beginning or times were different, but that was my favorite.

And so I wonder if he looks back, at that as saying like this is a really pure time in my career. I mean he was making 800K on a three year deal. So he was signing boats was 38k, backup quarterback second year came in late September. Everybody knows the story, but it wasn't like he was ever viewed as this great prodigy this early. When you look at old tape of him, it's like seeing the Beatles before the Beatles blew up. Like, nobody really knew what was about to happen. And I think for Tom, that had to be fun too. Like, this was the last time in his life when he was just the guy.

The last year of his life, that he could just walk around in public, that he could eat French fries, that he could date New England chicks. Like just, he was hooking up with regular chicks. And the run was crazy. So this is why it's in top three for me. Six straight, they went in the middle of the year. but before that, the dolphins beat him 30 to 10 and like his third start.

So like this wasn't some team that you knew was gonna win the whole thing. And by the way, Bledso was, I don't think people remember how good he was. Had he not gotten hurt, who knows what happens with Brady? It's another thing about the Patriots thing with, we knew all along like we deserve so much credit. I think it was blind luck for them.

The whole thing was blind luck. And as not sexy as that is to say, you know, if you liked him a lot more, you'd have picked him earlier. If you liked them that much and you knew what you were getting. You'd probably worked him in the lineup instead of Bledso.

But the rest is history. And that year had to be a blur. Absolutely. But the run was great. Tuck rule. And people forget about that game. They were down two scores in that game too in the fourth quarter. So you had the coolest snow game of all time,

dramatic kick. He got hurt in the AFC championship. People forgot that too. Bledso had to mop up for the kid that was essentially cuck and, him. Pipped him. Cucked him. Pipped him. I mean, certainly the scout, Dick Raybine,

the Patriot Scout that got credit posthumously for eyeballing Brady in the draft that year, that dude hit a home run. Anybody else, you can't really claim the origin story of Tom Brady. Tom Brady just happened, and this was when it happened, and I think it

had to be fun because, again, he didn't have a care in the world. He did hook up with Layla Roberts in 2000. too, per his wiki, who was a playmate of the month in 1997. That tells you kind of the waters he was swimming in. Most guys would be over the moon, but at this point, looking on his resume and seeing a playmate of the month five years ago, not even a playmate of the year, just a playmate of the month?

And Tara Reid? Did you know that? No. Terror Reed? Big Lobowski, Terrar Reed, though, different than later years. Tara Reid. Terreed was there too. Just shows you how far he's come.

Super Bowl 49. Play clock at five. This is going to be number one for me, I think. And I'll give you the Chief's Super Bowl in a moment. I'll tell you where I think it ranks in there, but we agree on Super Bowl 49. If Malcolm doesn't pick that ball off,

it's a 12-year drought. And not only that, The drought was a decade long in actuality, but everything that happened in between the Eagles win and this win, we basically went to college and became grownups in this time. Like I played in a hundred games in the NFL and went to college in this gap. He also lost playoff games like the AFC championship to Peyton Manning, the year the Colts won the Super Bowl, 3834.

So let down by the defense, you know, he's trying to get this monkey off his back. and then you got to watch the Colts go win it. You lose twice to Eli. You tear your ACL. Shout out Eli. Shout out Eli, your guy. Also, a huge underrated part of John made this point. You could have been three and three if you lose this game.

That's a big difference between four and two and three and three, like mentally for him. And along the way with all the losses to Eli, you know, the ACL, all the stuff I mentioned. By the way, after the ACL, Matt Castle wins 10 games. so people are saying, you know, system. System. That word's starting to use a lot. He's also competing with Peyton Manning, who's trying to catch him and is catching him and Reed made a great point.

Like at this point, remembering this time, you didn't think of Tom Brady like Tom Brady now. There was still a shadow of a doubt of who the goat is. You know, like, and Peyton was like the field goat and Tom was the championship goat. Because Peyton was racking up numbers. So to have to keep him at bay and know that if I can get four, that gives me so much breathing room, this was huge for him.

So I think this one he enjoyed more than any of them. And they're down late in the third. And it was kind of like that Kansas City game in the EFC championship. I just remember a bunch of intermediate conversions, which are the sketchiest plays in football. If you're on the sideline trying to will a team through like a two-minute drill, anybody with Tom back there that I've ever been around, it's just sketchy. You know, it's just you don't know that balls are going to get completed and you're going

to move the chains and he did it against the best defense he's ever beaten. Now, Super Bowl 55... You fake it here and then you run on the next door if you don't get it. There's the fake. There's the pass. And there's the catch for the touchdown. Antonio Brown. If that's the number one, is not far behind, but it's a different kind of fun.

I mean, like, this was just like let your freak flag fly. That's right, because the goat conversation had been cemented. Cemented. This was Brady Belichick. This was why is he doing this? Yes. I mean, we were, I was second guessing the move to Tampa mere months ago. They looked very pedestrian.

Halfway through the year. Halfway through the year. You just had to trust the process to use a. Philly term. So that process is still continuing. He let his freak pirate flag fly. He did. And I think the best metaphor I'd have is the kid that that bucks college and is like,

I'm going to go do this startup. And everybody's like, you fucking idiot. And then everybody wants a yacht. You know, like he just, he hit it out of the park, man. And his fingerprints are all over that game and the season. So like, another thing. is people killed Lane Johnson over the fun thing. I still get some idiot in my mentions one out of every three days. It's like, you haven't fun yet? And I'm like, no, it's Lane Johnson. I understand

my last name starts with Elle. We were friends. I played in New England. So you think that the only people that think that New Englanders don't have fun in the football sense are people who played there. You have this reputation. You revel in this reputation. Tom left because partially it didn't look like he was having as much fun there at that juncture. So I just think his big legacy this year is he went down, he had fun, he did it his way, he succeeded. At this point, I'm questioning, like, when does he lose at something? I, like, I really don't know if he's a serial killer. Like, we know, he is, as a teammate, he is Michael Jordan without being feared off, off the court and outside to white lines, which is not a necessity of being a leader.

Calling Scotty Borrell a bitch is not, you don't have to. It's just the way Mike liked to roll. Tom Brady was going to compliment you and build you up and answer your DMs. Or send you DMs when you retire. That's the difference. I'm not doing the cross sport comparison. But I will tell you as leaders, just watching the last dance and knowing what you know about Michael is like, teammates didn't know how to talk to him sometimes.

Like, he scared him. nobody's afraid of Brady unless you fuck up and even if you fuck up he's still going to shake your hand after the game and dab you up and smile when he walks by your family at you know and your family's all gawking because Tom Brady walks by and he's like he's not going to act like an asshole in the tunnel

whereas Jordan would say fuck your family fuck your family the whole nine yards if you watch the last dance Brady is Mike without scaring people outside I think the coolest thing about this year and I wanted to shoot him a message and tell him this but I'm not going to do it. Maybe you listen to the podcast.

Tom, let me address him. Let me break the fourth wall. Tom, I think your legacy, I think that this is the coolest thing about watching Tom Brady this year. Seeing guys that were struggling to hang with the culture change, to hang with the warp speed implementation of Brady's way, the Patriot way,

whatever you want to say, like what he took from New England, the discipline, the unrelenting pursuit of perfection, guys struggled with that early in that very undisciplined locker room. And after a while, watching the look on guys' faces as things started to work. Anybody who's trying to tell you something uncomfortable in life, they're trying to teach you, there's a period where you're like, no, fuck that, I'm going to do it my way. And then eventually you kind of relent and you're like, I'll give it a chance, but you've got to prove it to me that this works. you saw every phase of that

all the way through the Super Bowl when you couldn't wipe the smile off guys' faces and he was like the rainmaker. Everybody was walking up and it's basically like an unsc- You didn't even have to see the conversation on the field or at the parade. The conversation is, I appreciate you, Tom.

Although he wasn't the best player on the team, although he didn't throw for 500 yards in the playoffs, what he did for that culture and getting them over the hump and making big throws and spots and the leadership and the fire and the fight. That stuff is what separates him

and the whole world hates Tom Brady. People have all, I just call it how I see it. Tom Brady is a great teammate and you can see that in every interaction and you don't need to hear what's being said. You can see it in people's body language. You can see it when the whole team rolls up

in Brady draft shirts. You saw the pictures of him, you know, all scrawny in his grays. looking like a dad down the street. They got it on there. They got iron screen printed t-shirts. You've got, it's just how many guys has he made careers for?

And the guys have to do their part, whether it was in New England or Tampa, but having that presence, he unlocked the potential of that team. And it wasn't by putting up Godi numbers, it was by being Tom. So that's his legacy to me. at this juncture.

And I think this was a very fun Super Bowl for him. And I think the fun's just continuing. And he'll be back. I don't know about the Super Bowl, but he's gonna be back the next couple years if they don't botch this thing because he's got plenty left in the tank. The prey was fun.

We saw, I'm gonna ask Aaron about dropping Chris Godwin's phone. He didn't do it, but he knows, because I'm worried about the cloud. Did he have everything uploaded to the cloud? Bro. It's terrifying. Another time, but. trying to get a new mobile.

Not a fun process. It's impossible. Yeah, I mean, let's get Aaron Steny on. Dude, I was just saying with Richard Davis, myself, you, per capita, Charlottesville has to be up there for world champs. Got to be. There's only 50,000 people in Charlottesville proper.

Make, do the math. So that would be three into 50,000 that's roughly one and every 16,000 plus if there's a room full of 16,000 people

in Charlottesville there's a champion likely likely yeah city of champion I don't know what rooms are holding 16K but Aaron's been on the boats he was on the field blocking his ass off

I said this Aaron like the two big runs I was texting with your dad you know he was dean of students at our school now So I still talked to Big Phil. I texted Phil and I said you had two of the biggest blocks in the game. You had a great block in the second level on the Ronald Jones 17-yard run that kind of got the momentum going and allowed you getting to play action.

And then the four-nette run in the red zone, which is the thing of beauty. You did a great job. What was it like thinking, shit, I drew Chris Jones in my first Super Bowl. Man, it's crazy, man. and honestly thinking about it because all because those those three starts honestly the D-lines going against all of those and my first starts ever was was crazy but to be able to go against Chris Jones man he's he's a heck of a player and to be able to hold my own against them you know it was an awesome feeling and experience to be able to go ahead and do that yeah you you did you did

block some some tough players this year including through that run who was the best of them this year Kenny Clark man he's he was really good he's a dog yeah he's he's an animal has anybody has anybody checked on Tom Brady today that I don't know but he he was having a blast yesterday though oh my god dude the whole brand just came crumbling down as he stumbled off that boat all the avocado ice cream all the hydration all the Alex Guerrero

it just fell out I played with him for a year I never seen him like that man i don't i don't know man he he just looked like he was having a good time man he sure did that the video the video that i saw of him that wasn't the light that i saw him in when i saw him he he was very he was very together when i saw him so maybe that was like maybe you know it was bad timing with the camera they saw him like tripping up but i also think there's something too if you don't drink like which he really legitimately doesn't the guy doesn't doesn't party, it can go south fast. Yeah, that's, yeah.

Aaron, you go from waived on November the 9th to three months later winning a Super Bowl. I'm wondering, you're in the huddle with Brady. Are you nervous? I can't imagine not being nervous. Because if you get him hit, you're not just getting a quarterback hit. I'm only saying this now because the fucking season's over. I wouldn't give you this whole spiel three weeks ago. Wouldn't want to make.

I mean, but you already know if you get him hit. hit not only see the goat he's 43 like somebody falls on him wrong like your public enemy number one forever oh yeah definitely i guess i guess basically to bring it back just a bit is like so the first the first time i was really thrust it onto the field like that this year was against the rams and it's like hmm okay erin dominole over there let's let's make sure that doesn't get back there because that can get bad. Mm-hmm. You know?

Really bad. Like, that can get bad real quick. So, you know, I had a couple plays on that, you know, handled my own on those. And then going in, we got, because the Washington game, I was actually, I was actually inactive on the Washington game.

Right. And then when that happened, it was like, oh, you're starting next week. And I was like, all right. Yeah. Got to get the mind right for that. Because, you know, that is, like, as much as you try not to think about it, like, that's something that pops into your head. You're like, yo, if I get this man hit, everybody don't hate me.

Like, forever. Now, that Jensen guy seems like a nice guy. And by nice, I mean, really intense and not very nice. Yeah. You caught a stray in the Super Bowl because of Jensen's extracurriculars. Yeah, I think it was Chris Jones who came over the top. I knew coming into the game that Jensen was going to draw one personal foul. Yeah, and then Jones comes after Steny after the play.

Oh, when I was down on the ground. Were you like, what? Bro, I had no clue what was happening. I was like, it was pretty much like coming over the pile, and I'm starting to get up, and I just felt somebody dive into my back. And they were like pushing my shoulder pads, like, up. I'm sitting there like, what the hell is? is happening. Not a small person either.

Nothing at all. So I had no clue what was going on. Once I stood up and saw who it was and I saw the whole thing, and I was like, okay, I knew. So what is it about Jensen? Because it's a skill to be able to instigate people, D-Lyman. I mean, it's a skill now. You either have it or you don't. What makes Jensen able to piss us off so bad? He

does it better than I've seen anybody else do it, man. It's, it's crazy. Like, and it's, and it's not even that it's not even that he's doing anything dirty or anything late. It's just, he's getting on dudes and he's going to just drive you and talk his shit while he's driving you. And then he's going and then he's going let it be known after the play too. And I think his best thing that really like pisses a lot of people love is that after he does whatever he gets up and he just like gets this like laser then look on his face where like he doesn't see anybody but he manages to walk and bump every single person yeah it's the bump thing I have seen him just walk through people

there's nothing that pisses you off more than somebody on the side of the road that walks right into you the fucking sidewalk is this big if you're on the field and you just got blocked seven yards down field the last thing you want to do is have that guy bump you like you're in the grocery aisle. No, it's it's the funniest thing ever because I, I remember it was a, it was a thing it was against the Saints where he he literally drove dude off of the sideline and like slammed the lineback off sideline. Like I felt bad for that man because he, he was after him that day. Oh, it was yeah, it's our guy Ancelone. Yeah, Ancelone. Yeah, he, he, he, it was tough. It was a tough day for him because, you know, like he was coming right off the bench and

and Quana Alexander had gotten hurt and it just looked like Jensen was after him. Dude. And then after that play, he gets up and I look at Jensen and he has that look in his face. And as he walks, there's like eight dudes in front of him. He manages to bump every single one as he's walking back over. And I catch myself like starting to laugh as is happening because, everybody's getting so mad as it's going down. Oh yeah. I'm just like I'm like dude is it's hilarious though because like you you see it out there. He's like a hated man by everybody. Like it's a like it's like a

known listen I would hate him. I would hate him like when my buddy bow Allen was down there last year before he left in a trade with with New England that's where he went. Tom came down to Tampa. but he wouldn't really trade it. But he told me he goes, man, you would actually love Jensen. You would just hate to play against them. And that's usually how it is with those enforcer type guys. And that's how it is. Like, if like on his team, you're like when you're not playing against him,

you love him. Great dude. Great dude. Great character. Funny guy, man. He's awesome. And he's an excellent teammate. But if you're playing against him,

and some, you, you, you have no other choice but to hate them. Who was like one of the unsung heroes of that parade? Everybody that's gone viral, we saw, you know, we've heard about Godwin's phone, we heard about break catching the trophy, everybody saw Tom Blackout. Who had like a unsung parade day? The person that probably had the best time he was living it up and they were getting everybody going was the right tackle, Tristan. That's great.

Hey, my man was having a day. And it was, it was moments where he'd be down, like, talking to people. Yeah. You just hear everybody go, Tristan, Tristan, you got to get the crowd going. And he, what, what? And they takes off to the front of the boat. He's standing up holding on to the flag. This, now, this dude's like, this dude's like three.

He's a bear. He's like three. My man's up there, shirt off, flexing and screaming at the crowd, getting them to do different chances. It's like making. Yeah. I mean, same build. I had a video on my phone where he literally loses his voice as he's screaming.

And you just hear it chopping and going away with each word he's saying. So at one point where he's just screaming. And it's like the TV when it's on volume like one. Yeah. But like you like hear something, but like nothing's coming out. How do you treat? him because he's one of the best tacklers in the league already in my opinion you could see it right off the bat and he's a rookie like the guys cut out in 1999 as far as like franchise tackles

are concerned how do you guys treat him in that room because you like being a rookie you got it you got to pick your spots being a vet you got to pick your spots did you haze him hard or was it like hey man we need you no man it was it was it was a it was definitely like hey man we need you um because dude it's you you see it when you cut on the film man he's he's he's a dog all right absolutely like i saw i saw one stat they came out where they said my man had 799 pass plays one sack yeah you could see it pretty early and like even the bears game whenever was like yo he got body slam by calil mac or something i was like listen not taking anything in from Khalil, but that wasn't exactly like he got beat in pass pro. Even the sack he gave up

to Khalil, the drop target was a little deeper. And I mean, like, he was going against the best of the best and holding his own all year long. It was easy to see that pick at 13 was one of the biggest reasons you guys were able to get to where you went. And so I just, I just wondered what his kind of mentality was. I'm glad you say he's a good kid because he's been one of my favorites to watch this year. The initial point where everybody was like, yo, he's going to be a dog, is where our very first game of the year coming in, and it was such a weird year, we come in, no OTAs, no preseason games, and his very first game, he's going against Cam Jordan, one of the best in the league. And to watch that game and how he played against him for his very first NFL game,

everybody was like, yo, do special right here. Here's a parade question before we let you go. How about taking a leak on the boat? Did all these boats have bathrooms? Because that's one of the most underrated struggles of a parade. There's a lot of liquid going down. And there's not a lot of places to take a leak.

I'm going to be honest. I don't think that there was a bathroom on our boat. So what the hell was going on? That's what I'm saying. Bro, but like, I don't, like, if I'm being honest, though, like our boat per se, everybody was just in one spot and like never moved. Like our boat was like a crazy like party boat where everybody was just going crazy. And but like nobody really left the area.

I don't think anybody thought about going to the bathroom the whole time. But the funny. That's a different kind of drunk. Yeah. The funniest part about our parade though in our boat was it was also kind of like a war zone at one point. because everybody was so excited they wanted to like give us beers and stuff. Oh yeah. So you're just riding and people on other boats are just chucking beers.

That's fun. That's really fun until somebody's not looking. Exactly. And so there was times where, you know, you saw beers just coming in and somebody got hitting the back with a beer. Yeah. And like I heard it. It was just.

Chris Jones. Chris Jones. I was like, dang. Was there a moment in the game that you knew you were going to be a champ? Don't lie to us. Don't tell us we don't know until it hits triple zero. On the sideline, dudes knew at one point that you were going to be Super Bowl champs. When was that?

I would say probably in about that, probably in about that third quarter when they didn't score. on that first drive and then we beat down and scored again. I think that was a good feeling at that point. And did Tom really text all of you, we will win the entire every day for 10 days before the game? I didn't get that text. I love that being debunked. Yes.

Yes. Breaking news. There's been a lot of like random things put out about like text messages. Tell us some lies. Tell us about the biggest lies, dude. Just unload the clip on the lies. I've just wondered where, like, a lot of those, like, talks come out from, like, where, because I think when he first,

when he first signed and somebody came to there, it was like, yeah, so I heard he FaceTimed everybody on the team to, like, talk about what's going on. 53 face times and i was like i was like yeah i didn't maybe you're not on the mailing list he should probably put you on it because you're helping keep him upright erin stain did a great job so proud charlott's own uh yeah i can't tell you how happy we are for you here man and and congratulations and you played great thank you i really appreciate that man next time you come to town we'll we'll uh we'll get after it a little bit and celebrate definitely thanks for

Yeah, man, thanks for coming on. That about does it for our Super Bowl talk. Let's get Jason Kelsey on the line to sip some malt liquor. Guy looks like a guy who knows his malt liquor, doesn't he? I want to take a minute to thank Draft Kings, our great partner for the 2020 football season. And we also want to shout out Stanford Steve for being a big part of that. We had some laughs, made some buckets, and had a lot of fun along the way. but while the football season may have ended,

the 2021 sports calendar has just gotten underway. Had a terrific Super Bowl, might I add. So if you haven't already, head over to Draft Kings, America's top-rated sportsbook app and enter the code green light and start firing away. Jason Kelsey's with us. Jason is sitting outside next to a fucking gorgeous fire and a ginormous dog.

dog weighs more than I do how big is the dog jace and what kind of dog is it the Irish will found he's tipping the scales about 175 right now and if I pet him too much more he won't leave me alone so I'm going to let him be otherwise he just he's annoying he has to be getting pet at all times

and what's the dog's name again because I forget because this dog used to come in the locker room but it was half the size of this dog I'm looking at so this one right here this is Baloo. We named, he's Baloo after Baloo from the Jungle Book. And then our other dog is sitting there on the other couch. Winnie is named after Winnie the Pooh. We got a bear thing going on here.

All canine teeth for Baloo or some titanium? Some titanium. He's got a little, he likes to chew a lot of things. So, I don't know if you guys can catch that. I mean, literally you've got a game of their own setup going right now, including the dog. It looks like one of the dogs they fed. that guy to in Game of Thrones. You remember that scene.

Yeah, with the, yeah, that guy. I don't know if Jason actually. You know the guy, though, in actuality. Yeah. I don't know what guy,

but I know, I know, the fucking Ramsey. Ramsey Bolton, they threw him in there with the dogs, a bunch of Irish wolfhounds. Sansa,

Sansa. Sanza. Got back at them. So we're, so we're going to be blind. Fili accent coming out. Yeah, exactly. We're going to be blind tasting.

You've got that greater Cleveland area and Philadelphia hybrid. accent which is one of the sexiest in the world. There's nothing little wooder. Witter. Whisper water in my hair.

So there's a, so we've got eight cups of malt liquor, effectively malt liquor in front of us. And we're doing a malt liquor tasting as we alluded to earlier. We're going to have each round, me and Kelsey are going to drink, making is going to drink as well make? Nah, hell not. You don't do this? I'm off the sauce.

Over. All together? It just kind of sucks. Candidly. If I'm being candid as well, I don't drink unless we're doing an alcohol segment on this. Okay. So we're doing round one.

We're drinking the same liquid, numbered one. We don't see what they are. They're in these, you want to do this? Sure. They're in clear plastic cups. Here's the pool of malt liquor. Are you ready? Bud Ice, Colt 45, Old English, Ice House, Hurricane, Steel Reserve.

So there are two that are not on that list. They're wild cards. The first six out of one through six are any number of those. So we're going to take a stab at them. Reed will reveal after each round what the actual malt liquor is. shout out to Afro Man. Well, fire away, fellas, on number one. 40, number one, old English.

Okay, we're going to sip this. First, we smell it. Yeah, it smells. If this is one of... This is a very... It's very... It's dry. ...opake.

And... It is opaque. So I feel like it's not one... I feel like this is going to be either bud ice or ice house. That's what I'm getting... My gut is... It's not hurricane. It's kind of skunk.

I don't smell that strong. Give me the field of six. Sure. And no particular order, but ice, Colt 45, Old English, Ice House, Hurricane, Steel Reserve. This is Colt 45. Nope, no chance. Or it's, or it's. I haven't even tasted it yet.

I don't think it's OE. It's too bitter at the end to be OE. That is really nice. That's so smooth. I've never had Hurricane. What? Grew up on Hurricane. The best one.

how many 40s you think are in these eight cups combined like one and a half maybe 60 ounces of you know what you said cold 45 let me let me hear it again butt ice it's not bud ice it's not ice house yep no no not still reserved yeah no no cold 45 old english hurricane it's either gonna be like ice house ice house is the wild wild car for me because i never drank ice house has a very strong alcohol it'll hit you and you'll be like that's ice ice ice ice or bud ice

The ice ones are... I'm going to go... I'm going to go to you. The ice is... The icees are like cheating, you know, like drinking beer but cheating. Like, it's kind of a liquor drunk. It's essentially a milker to it.

Yeah. It's essentially a malt liquor. What was that? I said cold 45 if it's... I'm with you. One of the Titans. The answer is... Yeah.

Old English. Oh, E, man. Which is my number two favorite. Chris at 0.0. Jason at zero after one round. I thought it was too, it wasn't yellow enough for cold 45. Cold 45 was like golden. All right, here we go.

On to number two. 40 number two ice house. The field is down to butt ice, Colt 45, Icehouse. Oh, that's 211, that's 211. That's 211, that's 211, still reserve. That's fucking 211 that tastes like blackout. Man, I've never had hurricane, but I think that it's definitely not one of the icees. it's definitely not cold 45.

I feel like I can't just keep matching it, but I feel like that's still reserved. This is incredible. Yeah, it's a steel reserve, dude. Or no. Never had hurricane. I've never had hurricane. Have you ever had hurricane?

Is hurricane, would you guys say hurricane is stronger in taste or mild and taste? I think it's right. It's perfect. It's the Mendoza line for 40s. I'm going hurricane. It's not hurricane.

What are you saying? I'm going 211 if it's a, any of the Titans. And that means steel reserve? Yeah. Okay. The answer to number two is Ice House. Ice House. What? Yep. Dude, I thought I remember these being way strong. Apparently I was really good at drinking now. After round two, Chris, zero, Jason, zero. Well, we're off to a rip-roaring start here. You all ready for round three? You all ready for this? Hit it. 40 number three, Colt 45. The pool. Bud Ice. 45 hurricane steel reserve

malt liquor is a strong logger or ale in which sugar corn or other adjuncts are added to the malted barley to boost the total amount of fermentable sugars in the whart this gives a boost to the final alcohol concentration without creating a heavier or sweeter taste thus they are not very better this ain't steel I'm gonna go with

it's cold 45 or hurricane I'll give it colt 45 The answer to number three is Colt 45 Yeah That's a big lead That's a big lead That's a big lead

That's going to be hard to overcome 40 number four Steel Reserve All right so we'll go four here Hey Kelsch you're going to know 211 when it hits your lips We're down to butt ice

Hurricane and Steel Reserve I don't know if I told you I don't know Hurricanes This is Hurricane a little bit rough um yeah this this tastes like uh college man

you locked in i think i'm pretty locked in on hurricane i'm going butt ice if it's i'll tell you what if it's okay you say butt ice if it's still if it's still reserve then man i got better at drinking 40s in my old age what do you got

what we got to make it The answer to number four is Steel Reserve. God damn. Not as bad as I remember, honestly. After four rounds, the score is Chris won, Jason Zero.

It is just like sitting right here though, you know, just burning a hole in my esophagus. 40 number five, Hurricane. Number five will be either Bud Ice or Hurricane. in the American vernacular

I think this is butt ice 40 is a glass or plastic bottle that holds 40 U.S. fluid ounces U.S. fluid ounces This is butt ice. I'll go butt eyes. I got to go to the other one though. I'll fucking win, right?

Yeah, you probably do have to All right, I think it's butt ice but I'll put my voting in for a hurricane. Jason's locked into Hurricane. The correct answer is Hurricane. Fuck me, we're tied. Oh, we're tied.

So that means number six. Boy, these tastes a lot more alike than I thought they did. The power of packaging. 40 number six, butt ice. Number six can only be but ice, but would like for you both to taste it and give your answer just in case one of you isn't so bright. Once again, it can only be but ice.

You know what? I feel like you guys are tricking me right now. This doesn't taste. Oh, but ice is so smooth. So smooth. Why did I thought I remember those ice ones being, like,

having like a little bit of, like a little, almost like vodka. Hey, do you have one of these, a spare one or? Well, I have the rest of all the food.

Yeah, I think we'd be drinking one after this. You all got butt ice for both of those? We got butt eyes. I feel like they had to have changed the formula on that around since I've been in college. You guys both go two for six before the wild carts. Okay, let's go to the wild cards.

We got wild cards. Yeah, there's two more. It's a great buzz, man. I actually feel really good right now. I feel great. Malt liquor's the best buzz in the whole kingdom of alcohol. It's been a while since I've felt this form of inebriation. It's an old friend.

I did. It makes me feel warm. Sentimental. Warm. It's really good in the snow. Okay. What was a number of 40 ounces that was just kind of like the danger zone in college for you? Well, the big thing that we did was the Edward 40 hands.

Oh, duct tape. Yeah, and I always drank those as fast as possible. So I guess two. Yeah, two puts you in in a good mood. If you get down to four, if you go four, it's going to be a lot. long night. That was the there's like a chart somewhere for what you do

after each 40. Okay, on to the wild car round, we got four. We got Mickey's. Yeah. Milwaukee's best. Bulls slits. Yeah. Okay. And Natty Ice. Those are the four

possibilities, eh? Yep. So if y'all would drink number seven. 40 number seven for Kelsey. Natty Ice. 40 number seven for Chris the bull slits I hate these ices I hate the ice family what are you no that's fair

that's fair as fuck I'll tell you one I didn't have a lot of growing up was Mickey's Mickey's Schwarz or the other two do you know the bull the bull schlitz the bull schlitz is one and the same I'm not familiar with that one

Natty Ice the Milwaukee's best and Mickey's I'm not going to know shit about Milwaukee's best either. There were so many different options in this genre of killing yourself. Well, here's the lesson of this whole thing is they all taste the same. I'm gonna go Milwaukee's best. Okay. I'm gonna go natural ice. Okay. Jason was drinking Natty Ice. You were drinking the bull, Chris. Damn, we're not drinking the same. Oh yeah, because there was four.

I get the drill now. Y'all are both at two. Two out of seven now going to the final round. Golly. You know what? We're above the Mendoza line if we were baseball players. 215 being the Mendoza line. 40 number eight for Kelsey, Milwaukee's Best.

40 number eight for Chris, Mickey's. So this is the final round. This is the final round. After that, we're going to chug a 40. Either one of us has Milwaukee's Best or Mickey's. That's correct. Now, you can both. Both guests the same one, and that way we can guarantee a winner.

Holy shit. This thing is like dry, like, very dry. I'll go Mickey's. I think mine's actually Mickey's. Jason Kelsey was drinking. Molyker Math. Milwaukee's best. Chris is the winner.

Yes. You were drinking Mickey's. Yes. You've lost your touch, man, and your nice gazebo with a beautiful hearth fire. place and a giant dog. Mountain Cliff Kingsbury, you. Yeah, you are a Mountain Cliff Kingsbury out there.

You want to drink one more? You want to finish a 40 with me? An actual 40? I would love to. Okay, let's do it. I'll do a hurricane for old time's sake. Hurricane rebranded? Let me see. Hurricane rebranded, man.

Let me see. Look at it. Well, you wouldn't know what it was branded before. Do you remember? Yeah, dog. This is fucking, this is Fugly. It had like a NASCAR vibe. It had green? green, yellow. Look up the old hurricane logo.

Jesus Christ, look the size of that dog when it got up and moved. I mean, the size of this fucking dog. Look at that thing. You look superimposed. You look like one of those people that when you Google big dog little man that comes up, if you've ever Googled that.

Google it. I have. Probably when you were looking at like, how big is this Irish wolf found that I'm about to buy? Okay, this is like a damn near a segment we just fell into. It's called not lightning round, hurricane round. It's like a different weather system.

Same desired result. Making just grilling us with questions can be about anything for the next five minutes. We're going to finish our hurricane in that time. I can't wait. What's something you resent paying for? Just about every subscription service I've ever bought. right because they don't they just they keep tacking it on don't they yeah and for some reason I'm too stupid to fucking cancel it mm-hmm that's relatable what are you currently worried about

um retirement yeah that's a good one I was thinking more about I'm sorry go ahead Chris no no no it's actually pretty pertinent to this conversation because I'm just thinking about how this 40's going to make me feel which is a lens into my life which is much simpler than yours and you should retire at some point soon because it's amazing when you get here it is awesome it's a six inches in front of your face that's all dude just this 40 that's all I'm worried about you you're like existential crises contracts football what's gonna yeah yeah like I'm just thinking about this 40 bro yeah that's nice yeah broke the shoulders on this bad boy already what animal would be cutest if scaled down to the size

of a cat tiger well I would say giraffe but I feel like it's kind of cheating because of those commercials that used to come on do you remember those ones no

you remember those commercials the Russian guy and they'd have like a it was actually a little they used to say that you could buy them it was like a whole scam little baby drafts they're like the size of the fat

you remember is this the Furbies are you just thinking of the Herbies? No. This is like it was a commercial. Or Beanie Babies. You're just thinking of Beanie Babies. No.

This is a commercial about insurance, I think. And there was some Russian dude that had like a tiny giraffe walking by. And I would do it. You went to a website. If you went to a website, you could buy it. And nothing was adorable. But you were like $1 million in whatever in line. And the stick was, it was all obviously not real.

like you could like pay money elephant will be really nice who do you go out of your way to be nice to people providing a service yeah i was about to say like uh waiters but yeah i think that's a good i'm with you on that and like literally like the woman cleaning your hotel room the man cleaning your hotel room, to be fair. You know, like, they literally are cleaning up after you. Be fucking nice. Be polite. People at restaurants that are rude to servers, I want to flip the table over on them.

Anybody whose job really to, you know, make your life better, I feel like I go out of my way to try and be nice to those people. They got, you know, good on them. The mint guy in a nightclub. That's my one. I'm going to disagree with it. Yes. The mint guy.

It is controversial because the mint guy, you didn't ask for a mint. Yeah, I mean, well, that guy shouldn't exist. I didn't ask for that service. That service was forced on me. Yeah. Yeah. And then you avoid washing your hands. I have a problem with the mint guy.

I have a problem with the establishment that put the mint guy and put us in this predicament of me having to wash my hands and having to. Look at this guy in the face. Don't blame the Mink guy. It's not the Mink guy's fault. Don't hate the player. And listen, it is a shame that it puts you in this situation where you got to be like, do I want to clean my hands right now?

Because if I do, the guy's going to be like, how are you doing? And you're going to be like, good, having a good night. And he's just like looking at you. And the unspoken conversation is, hey, man, I'm about to dry your hands off. you're going to you're going to dry your hands off and if you do i need money yeah i mean i i didn't piss on my hands i didn't like uh there's nothing that warrants me coming over to this sink right here oh no i've been discussing this with you so except you did piss listen i didn't piss on my hands though so you're good to go back into the the nightclub restaurant whatever i'll go back to eating chicken

wings. As long as I didn't piss on my hands, I feel like that doesn't warrant all the time a washing of the hands. Maybe I'm, uh, no, you're not like, listen, it's one of those things that, and this is going to be controversial. It's the cleanest part of your body. Science proves it. Your wean. Yeah. Your wean is the cleanest part of your body. It's covered the entire day. But now imagine we're about to, you know, you're about to eat some chicken wings and I walk over to your table, see you guys and Meg and I are walking in. I dab you up. You go back to eating your chicken wings. Say I just took a piss in the alley outside. How are you feeling about that? Didn't piss on my hand. You didn't piss on your hand? But he got like flaky ween skin on his hand.

Have you pissed on your hand? You fucking dab me up. I'd be a little upset about that. Next question. What was the last photo you took? Last photo I took? Don't know. this fire I wish I could say something cool like my daughter but I'm a father of a daughter myself are you yeah how old

three and a half weeks you're your brand new you're brand spanking new yeah generous paternity on this show thank you congratulations to you guys for being such on a fucking moral high ground congrats guys you got fathers of daughters

what do you mean a moral high oh how are we on a moral high ground Because you know, you know what I hate is it's a pet peeve when people say like somebody does something despicable out in the world. And then a bunch of dudes are like, as a father of a daughter, that makes me so angry. I'm like, so wait, if you didn't have a daughter, you would think that was okay? I mean, I will say, obviously, no, that's not the way it works. but without question after having now I'm about to have a second daughter I like thinking myself about dude I like literally think to myself about like walking girls to their house

like stuff that like I never like I did but like I didn't really understand because I didn't have any sisters growing up nothing just my mom yes and like stuff that like I never really understood the purpose of and now being a dad and obviously my kids or like my boy at my first one's only 16 months. But I like wonder of like, man, I never really understood the significance of like doing little things like that. And I'm trying to raise my kids, my daughters to be not like non-gender specific, but not to like pigeonhole them into like what it means to be.

Yeah. Like I feel like as a child that you should just let your kid be a kid. And like you don't this whole like male, female, like all this stuff. it's like overblown quite a bit but like I do think to myself like I never really understood like those like little things

that like in the grand scheme of things is there's a reason why you do that when I think of a lot of that Chris go ahead I was just going to tell you that Jason that is the father of a daughter I couldn't agree with you more until I have until I have a daughter

I'm just going to let the door hit women that are walking behind me is that so i'm just gonna i'm just gonna i'm gonna drive my truck through puddles on the side of the road when there's like women on the way to business meetings until i have a daughter it's not that you don't do it no i know it's not that you do do it because of a daughter but for some reason looking at like an innocent child who is a female yes for some reason it's like forced me to think about something like that but anyways no i i love this conversation because it's an age old like you know the father of a daughter thing i can't measure up to you guys maybe if i had sisters it would be different

because i'd have a sister reference i'd have a frame i literally don't know anything about women outside of my wife and experience of bars and that's about it and now it's like you know and i still my my daughter has zero she doesn't even know she's a girl she's just like she's a fucking rambunctious little kid but next question what's the hardest you've ever worked oh man al grow al grow al grow i love this reference already i don't even need to hear the yeah you you hung out with al i have i got a lot of respect for al i was the man dude al grow worked me like a fucking dog in charlotsville circa 2004 i was going home and drinking these motherfuckers I would say

Dave Andrews Strength Coat to Cincinnati I like went to Cincinnati thinking I knew like what hard work was and thinking that like I was like a tough kid and they like put me through like a weightlifting program where you went everything until failure

and told me to walk with like one of those like yoga balls across the weight room at the end of it and if I could hold it the whole time you're done with your workout and then I couldn't make it obviously they knew that before they even told me that was like my welcome into college what how much of those yoga

what kind of yoga balls did y'all have in Cincinnati no dude it was that it was that green yoga ball same when we had a Cincinnati in Philly like I'm telling you we did so many goddamn shoulder raises have you ever done so many shoulder raises I'll tell you the hardest no you stop doing the shoulder raise yes and then all of a sudden

your arms start like raising because they're like, you've been doing so many of them. They're levitate. Just start doing it naturally. Yeah, exactly. I worked really hard in Philly because they never gave you a fucking day off. I had to share a locker. Yeah, to fucking share a locker.

He knows the story. That was, dude, can we? Let's talk about that. That was one of the craziest experiences of my life. And it's awkward as fuck that Redacted is near you, but it wasn't Redacted's fault. Redacted is in this story, the Mint Man. and, you know, Howie and the guys upstairs

are the nightclub owner. So I'm not holding this against the equipment guys because they were just doing what they were told. Motherfucker, some guys had their own lockers. He had his own locker. He had his own locker. Man, I looked over. Tori had his own locker.

Garrett had his own locker. You were the only one. A former Super Bowl, first round pick. Yeah. Highest grossing in the entire. higher locker. Yes. Like more sex than anybody else in the locker room.

Soon to be charity guy. Yeah. I mean like there was literally. I mean it was it was insane. I still remember that and it was absurd at the time and it's only got more absurd. I have the picture in my office of me and redacted shoulder pads next to each other. Like I like literally trying to take my I think I was getting dressed and. Yeah.

I got hitting a leg with buddy's underwear. Like, you know, have you ever gotten dressed next to another human being so close that their clothes were falling on your ankles? Like, that's fucked up, dude. Anyways. Yeah. Well, I will say, did you ever have to do that in St. Louis? No, dude. I was, I was, I was, I was, first round pick. I was the king.

I was the king. I think a lot of guys have to do that, like, their first and second year. But usually once you're like 11 years. in like leading, especially when yeah the leading sack leader like all these lists like that's not something

that happened at that point it was tough when I walked when I rounded the corner and saw long redacted right next to each other what was the best thing that happened to you today

me did this podcast man it was great hanging out with my buddy making and seeing my old buddy Kelsey who needs to come visit us and his giant dog and redacted with him from the

who bought the prayer candles for the infamous oh my God hey Kelsey can we clear one thing up yeah that the the fucking shrine didn't mean a damn thing in intent

but anybody involved yeah I mean I don't think it meant anything like purposely like trying to like say anything but it was also like it was cool as fuck and And, you know, if it wasn't Nick Foles, it probably wouldn't happen. Like Nick's persona and like everything about him probably made that happen as well.

Like his penis. Well, you got quite the presence when you're when you're packing heat. Dude, he's just a storybook creature. Nick is the closest thing to like a real life, Moby Dick that I've ever come across. To the giants that they reference in the Bible. yeah exactly they're gonna talk about Nick Foles in 2000 years

dude what word is a lot of fun to say doink nice I'm gonna go you can leave any time make I know but you're having fun

I can see it this 40 is fucking golly dude I'm already committed so I'm gonna finish the motherfucker where are you now Jason on this bad boy um

I'm about the finisher and the next goal. Wow. I better hurry up then. He wins. Well. Better go, Jason. Got about two seconds over here. I'm going to go.

I'm going to. Oh, gosh. I'm going to go shit. I just, I just put that word. Oh, my God, dude. Jason came through with his most fun word,

but you just won the 40 battle. And it was not without, no lot. You used to be able to put one of these down in 18 seconds. Oh. Do you remember that? Yes, it's all coming back now. I'm so glad you remember this. Tell Jason we used to do 40 chugging contests, me and redacted, who's now a coach. What's your funniest story involving a car?

I'll go, I was in high school with a minivan, which was the car I drove in high school. And we're driving to a, like, a party. And I start hearing this, like, in the engine. and it wouldn't go away. I'm like, what the hell is going on, guys? I don't know what this is. So I had the genius idea of trying to put the gas down and like maybe if I go faster,

it'll just spit whatever's in there out. It's just going clear. I'm like, oh my God, that worked. I can't believe that worked. Driving straight, the moment I have to turn, I realize I have zero power turning. And I am cranking this minivan with seven guys in it And four cases of beer around a cul-de-sac.

And there's a cop right there, literally at the gas station, at the cul-de-sac. And we take the beer out of the minivan, put it in the bushes. The cop, sure enough, comes around. And, you know, what's going on, yada, yada, yada. He pushes me into the gas station. The guys did somebody pick them up with the beer. This is in Cleveland Heights. This is this was in University Heights

But back when I lived in Cleveland Heights yes Man you dude I would love to meet Cleveland Heights Jason Kelsey Man it's it's not much different Dude you would have fucking we would all hung out in high school We'd all gotten along We would have been tight you me making

Oh no doubt I think I would have got along with making better Yeah probably Future Fathers of daughters Yeah, it's true. You can go if you want. Where are you not welcome anymore? O'Neill's Irish pub, which is out of business.

Hey, man. I went up there, I stole a bottle of Jack Daniels. I was 19. Stole a bottle of Jack Daniels and the owner banished me for life. Yeah. A silver lining, place went out of business, new bar popped up there, walked into the new bar first day. For me, it was the same place. Yeah.

Where are you no longer welcome? I'm no longer welcome. That's tough. I feel like I'm welcome pretty much everywhere. Boy, that was no longer welcome. I mean, yeah, when you wear the mummer suit, you can go wherever you want. Yeah. Where is that thing right now?

It's in my basement, which is currently not, it's got like water seeping through. Here's what's funny. That's perfect. That's perfect. You're disregarding like one of the most famous sports outfits of all time. It's in your basement. The NFL Hall of Fame asked me if I wanted to fucking give it to them to put in there. Bro, listen.

And the minor league version of your mummer suit. my fur coat like triple a ball to your like whatever you are um above the mendoza line hitter in the big your minus the speech your outfit was 50,000 times better than anybody else's I don't know about that dude I don't know about that I'm just saying listen you know what I'm going to tell you something, bro. You know what's so cool about you? I'm going to tell him something. I'm going to drop some knowledge on him right now. Lightning around, hurricane round.

Drop some. Yeah, okay. My dog is the king of one of the biggest cities on the eastern seaboard in the United States of America. He is as popular as any sports figure in the history of

Philadelphia. How cool is that? Because of his play, but also because he finished it with the charisma one of the best players in all time Eagles history but he also has a personality it's fucking cool

you ever think about that redacted is nod in his head because he's saying this motherfucker that's the great thing about Jason Kelsey he does not know how legendary that shit was I will say this though people will be shocked to know

that my fucking fur coat is hanging in like the junk closet in my house and I wear it to be the bath monster. The bath monster is a guy that comes out when the kids haven't had a bath in too long. So when it's bath time, I put the fucking coat on. I put this troll wig. It's this multicolored wig. I have Oakley sunglasses and I stomp around the house and scare the shit out of my kids.

That's what I'm doing with the fur coat and you have yours in a basement. All right, so cats have nine lives, right? Yeah. If you guys had nine lives, how many have you used? Like basically, how many times have you escaped death? Oh, dude, definitely one time. I was close to dying, man. Real close.

I've also probably been close to dying a lot of times, to be honest. How about you? Because most times you're close to dying, you don't know. Yeah, exactly. There's a couple of times where you're on some ice And you know You realize that there's a stone ledge right there And one wrong step all of a sudden

I was thinking more like you're drunk hanging your head out the window like an idiot Like Darwin Awards at 19 You know like on the way home That's my one time There's when I was So Chad Hall who's received Coach up in the floor right now

me and him playing the Philly other redacted anyways he used to have a big time yeah he used to have a big time uh fourth of July party and you'd rent like these like

houseboats and one time the houseboat was chilling in the cove for a long time and everybody's coming in now yada yada yada was getting late and the houseboat starts going well I wasn't around boats

my whole life. I've never really been around water. So I think it's a good idea to, I had to go to the bathroom. So I go to the back of the boat and the line for the bathroom because everybody's been drinking all day is huge. I decide the boat hadn't started moving yet. And I decide I'm going to tie the rope that's designed to tie to the docks to my waist.

And I'm just going to jump in the water and go to the bathroom. you told me this and I'm not I'm not kidding you the moment that boat started going I knew I was fucked I can't describe dude it's it's the closest to death I've ever been the moment

the boat started going it pulled me under the water my bathing suit got ripped off of my butt I am naked because I had to go to the bathroom I was shitting myself I can't explain this any better.

Luckily, it was a short rope so I could grab the rope and pull my head out of the water. Luckily. And breathe. And I'm screaming to the people in line from the bathroom. Stop the ball!

I mean like, oh yeah, it's all funny. I'm so I'm dying. I get pulled back under again a fucking minute. And I'm just like conserving energy so I can pull myself.

again. Let myself down. Eventually the boat stops, luckily. Otherwise, I would literally be dead. I'm not laughing. And the guy who was operating the boat is berating me about how stupid I am. And I'm like, listen, buddy, I'm fully am aware.

I know. I'm in. It could be dead too, though. Dead and stupid. Like, good for me. Thank you for stopping the boat. And then I got back into the boat fully naked and my mom was on the boat. No! Not a boat I pictured your mom being on. I pictured this being a... Donna Kelsey for some reason had made a trip. So if I would have died,

she would have come down to the back of the boat where I would have been being dragged through the water because I thought it would be a good idea to tie a fucking rope around my ways and go to the bed. You actually were pretty close to being dead. I almost drowned once too. I will never fuck around with water. Water is scary, dude. Once again, like that is... I have a whole new respect for the power of water that, like, uh, growing up because we didn't, you know. Dude, listen, I started a water charity to suck up to water.

Okay? Like, pay tribute. You think you respect water. I respect water more than anybody. Jason Kelsey, everybody. Uh, that was our first, uh, hurricane round. which is undoubtedly something's going to make us a lot of money sponsored by Hurricane.

Yeah? Official malt liquor of the Greenlight Pod. Jason Kelsey, thank you, brother. All right, brother. Take it easy.