Green Light with Chris Long - Jeff Passan! MLB Rule Changes, Coolest Teams & Is Mike Trout the Goat? NFL Schedule Review & Athlete Accessory Draft.

Episode Date: May 13, 2022

(2:12) - Hello, Layup Line and Macon’s Story Time.  (20:00) - NFL Schedule Review: Best Matchups, Thanksgiving and Christmas Day Games and Best Potential Postgame Handshakes To Look Forward To. (34:05) - NBA Playoffs Update: Best and Worst Plane Rides, Memphis Blows Out GSW, Jrue Holiday vs Boston and Bobby Portis.  (55:48) - Jeff Passan on Baseball’s First Month, MLB Rule Changes, Coolest Team, Players Mic’d Up, Tanking in Baseball, Chris’ Idea for the Athletics and Is Mike Trout is the Best Ever? (1:34:08) - Macon’s Pet Peeve.  (1:39:07) - NFL Update: Sam Howell’s Diet, Jim Irsay's Airplane Video, Tom Brady’s Mega-Broadcast Deal and Tua’s Deep Ball Video Review.  (2:09:18) - Best Athlete Accessory Draft. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light Tube YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/GreenLightTube1 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. https://www.greenlightpodcast.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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And in Michigan, 1-800-270-7-1-17-8-9. I welcome you to the Greenlight podcast. We're talking baseball today in Studio J. It's Jeff Passing. He's going to go over MLB rule changes. Which squad is currently the coolest team in baseball? And how good are Mike Trout and Shohei Otani really? Before Jeff making us a story, we review the NFL schedule

and give you a couple takes from the NBA playoffs. After Jeff, it's an NFL update along with a best athlete accessory draft at the end. Happy Friday, y'all enjoy. Will you guys be adults if I have to fart during the podcast? Oh, we're, oh no, okay. You don't want to go there. We're taking a peek behind. It's such a good, it's such a good quote. I said, that's, it's not quite what I said. I said, hey, can we be grownups today if I have to fart? It's the same thing, dude. In the middle of the show. Because oftentimes you guys started giggling in the back and you make it an off-club joke. That was so good. I love it. Like, we're

being children for acknowledging the fart, not you pushing one out. It's not a push out situation. It's a medical condition. It's a medical condition. It's called eating Betty White grilled cheese before you get over here. Nah, dog. That's, I'm, I'm, I'm, it was a salad. Okay. I got a story. Yeah. You're, you're involved. Yeah, this is good. One of my favorite stories of the year, maybe of all time. I think it's a microcosm of our friendship. So here we go. You and I live in the same neighborhood. At the back of the neighborhood, there's a gate. Yeah. Does that mean we live in a gate community? No, because there's a way to get in. I say no. Because yeah, there's a back road that if

you want to go certain places, it's nice to get out this gate. Right. And in the front, there's no gate. So, we lure the criminals in through the front with no gate. And then I catch them. And then we catch them at the back gate. Bad criminals. So at any rate, you're, you know, we're driving separately. We're driving unbeknownst to each other. You're, you're on an outing. I'm work we're both coming home and I see you at the back gate hey there's there's Chris and you kind of motion for me to come ahead and so I say hey you're with our friend Tom I say hey Chris hey Tom and you say that you don't have your gate key for the back gate I don't and I say oh no problem no problem no problem let me let you in here so there are two options at this point either I swipe it

and and you speed behind me and get in under the gate before it comes down or I leave the gate key for you so you can swipe it and then I get it from you at another time. Can I just say option two probably needed to be talked out? No question about it. There is not any question about it. Okay. So I get to the to the gate keypad. I open the thing and I think I decide okay I'll leave it for him because I'm in my land cruiser which is loud it looks like a redneck truck like this is not a redneck hence the gate. It's not a redneck establishment. I have a memory from sometime in my life that this is a quick gate. I think it's a quick gate.

I don't know if I've seen it come down before on somebody, but I just think it's a quick gate. So I decide to open the back gate with the key card and then leave it on top of the keypad for you. Now, um, you decide to speed behind me. Naturally. Our friend Tom midway through your speeding behind me says, whoa, whoa,

wait, he did the key card on the fucking thing thing. Option two. crunch. Yeah, the gate comes down on me as I stop. Gate comes down on your motor vehicle. It's, it's, it's,

it's a hellscape. It's pandemonium. It's Antietam out there. Somebody's coming behind you to try to get into this neighborhood. And you're at a bad spot. Not only has the gate come down on your car, you got to go back and retrieve my key card from the top of the thing. Stopping the middle of the road.

I've got, you know, soccer moms pulling around me, you know, grimacing at me. like I like I like I'm the subject of a neighborhood watch investigation and then I'm looking at all this from my rear view like holy smokes this is this is us it's a it's it's wonderful friendship in love and loyalty and sacrifice and shitty communication just really poor communication that leads

to uh mayhem yeah well thank you the truck's okay yeah sorry appreciate it's only my my most valuable worldly possession. I was genuinely, I didn't see it, the little, the literal crunch. As a weak-ass gate. And, uh, it's a weak-ass, uh, what do they call it, arm at the gate? Yeah, the arm. When you told me the arm had come down, I was legitimately, um, sad, sorry, uh, worried. Yeah, I pulled up the hell you said, nobody makes content like us.

I was like, ah. We're not even trying. No, we're not even trying. Just live in the same neighborhood. It was bad news bears from a, uh, help a friend down. However it, however it. It's the second time I got yelled at in my own neighborhood that day. I mean, I can get yelled at, but you know when somebody yells at you with their eyes?

That's what I was getting. Oh yeah. Dude. I was getting a lot of reemings like just nonverbally. You'll like me admitting this. I gotta go down a hill to get to my house. And it says 15 miles an hour on the road. You cannot go 15 miles an hour if you tried.

You didn't put any pressure on the pedal. I get stared at for going 19 miles per hour. And then I start screaming that I'm going 19 miles per hour in my car so they don't hear me. Because I want to, you know, still be the normal guy with the windows open. Oh, no. That's what I would do. Because there are neighbors, you know, see them all the time. Fuck them.

Well, I know they're not listening. You would think that to be the case. If they are listening, you're probably one of the ones that we like. Yeah. But honestly, earlier that day, I went quote unquote golfing with my brother Cal and my friend Tom and because I lived near a golf course they were just kind of like hey you're going to be awkward

and not come like just ride around with us again I'm totally down to ride around and golf what happened was I was driving my golf cart and the guys told me we got to go back and get our pitching wedge because we forgot it naturally so they told me it was fine to drive through where I drove through and

a fucking shocker it wasn't I got the cart people came and yeah like gave me a talking to I think some old ladies called the feds on me, which I was, what the fuck happened to the code, bro? Stop snitching, man. Stop snitching. Were you driving on greens or through T-boxes?

No, through like tall grass that just didn't have like a cart sign on it. You know what I mean? But you were backtracking through a course? But again, I was doing it. It was somebody else's fault. That's the commonality here. It's not my fault, but I get the reaming, dude. I get yelled at my own fucking neighborhood.

Now, I happen to know, and you just. So fuck golf. You just copped to it. You own golf cart. Is that the one you were driving? Yeah. They said, sir, well, here's the thing about personal carts. We can't have personal carts driving off the path.

It's like living near the ocean and not being able to swim, but not actually enjoying looking at it. No, golf course is nice to look at. But I'm not getting yelled at. It's too many times a one day getting yelled at in my own neighborhood. Hey, dude, guess what? we talked about Crystal City restaurant the other night. Yeah. We had one of the performers reach out to me.

Wow. About making a trip up there to try the sushi. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah. And, you know, I think that's a bit of an olive branch from Crystal City Restaurant. Of course, the restaurant, the strip club that we discussed that I've heard served sushi in northern Virginia to go with the show. I had said with Stanford Steve on the line that I would never eat strip club sushi.

Now strip clubs have good food. Okay, so there's nothing against eating in a strip club. I think that's probably one of the cleanest places to eat, honestly, is a strip club. But sushi, I wouldn't go that far. But maybe I would if we bring green light up to Crystal City restaurant and we have Reed be our guinea pig. What do you think about that? I'm game.

Allegedly it's Crystal City Gentleman's Club, according to an insider. Oh, a rebrand. Crystal C. Yeah, it's now gentlemen's club. Now this young lady who reached out is her name.

Is her name Crystal? No. No, no, no. I don't want to docks her. What's it to start with? You can find it in my comments on Instagram. Oh, okay.

Under the social. All right. But I guess she had heard about it. You know, it's Crystal City. They have like probably a social team and everything. And they reached out. I cannot wait to go up to Crystal City restaurant for work.

Yeah, that'll be great. A work trip, dude. The write-off and everything. I'm going to be sending, I'm going to be sending an item, us, gas money, sheets stop, tolls and shit, and then sashimi at Crystal City at CCGC. Kate, good news, bad news. I won't be home for bath time or bedtime.

But I'll be getting my omega-3 fatty acids. Ha ha, ha, ha, ha. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. We're going up there. We'll be there soon. We'll be there soon. Expect us.

Expect us. And hey, more on that and a few. Hey, Friday the 13th is today. Your today are tomorrow. You know that actually comes from Judas being the 13th guest at the Last Supper? I did not hear that as we are a theological podcast. Now, the Last Supper.

Yeah. So I don't mean to get. Crucifixion on Friday. So the crucifixion, happened right after the last supper? Not soon after, I think. Because Friday happens. They went to dinner.

He comes back Sunday. But wait. Then Mary Magdalene moves a rock or something, right? I was going to tell you how it went before we go too far down this rabbit hole. All of that happened on Friday the 13th. They all went to dinner. There was one guy that came to dinner and they were like, this guy will tell like all the secrets. Don't have him to dinner.

And then he came to dinner and then he told people the secrets. And then three days later, Jesus is dead. But they didn't realize that Jesus, Jesus has extra lives. He died on a Sunday or a Friday? One of those days, Friday the 13th comes from Christianity. Hispanic cultures say Tuesday the 13th. Did you know that? Which makes a lot more sense because Friday the 13th, you're like, man, you know,

a dump truck could hit me today, but it's also Friday. You know, like there's a win there somewhere. And then with Hispanic cultures, they're like, it's fucking. Tuesday and I could die. Italy, it's Friday the 17th. So these are a couple facts for the people at home. Friday the 13th this year, we're going to be celebrating y'all's today.

This is Stevie Wonder's birthday. So happy birthday, Stevie Wonder. Layup line's going to be higher ground. Which was funny enough, like the first time I ever heard higher ground was red hot chili peppers. And then I backtracked and heard the much funkier version.

We were just listening to songs to the key of life. You know, that album that my parents always talk about. Yeah. It's pretty fucking good. I mean, I know the album,

but, you know, I think I'm going to go all the way down to Stevie Wonder Rabbit Hole. You know what? My favorite thing about Stevie Wonder is? What?

I've heard a conspiracy that he's not blind. Yeah, I've heard that too. You've heard this conspiracy too? I talked to our, not a friend of the program yet, Beaumani Jones about this one.

Oh, nice. Yeah, throw a tennis ball out. I'll catch it. I heard Stevie Wonder. I heard a rumor that Stevie Wonder, this is from somebody I don't want to out them,

but they were after a show, they're a musician, they got in a golf cart with Stevie Wonder. He was driving the fucking thing, dude. All right? I'm just saying, dude. I'm just saying, the guy's unbelievable. He played in Charlottes with the relief concert

a couple years ago. The guy's a fucking legend. Happy birthday of Stevie Wonder. Shack told a story on NBA, TNT that he got on a elevator with Stevie Wonder one time. And Stevie Wonder was looking at looking at the wall and said, what up, Shaq? Right?

Yeah. Yeah, like fucking, he just knows Shaq by his breathing. Right. I don't know, dude. I'm just saying. I'm just saying, dude. I'm not saying, but I'm just saying. And then a hello today.

Seattle, Washington. Yeah. Yeah. Hello. I think this is just what I sound like now. In perpetuity. No, you're doing better. I just got pollen stuffed into my head.

You're doing better. It'll be better when the pollen chills out a little bit. But we're saying hi to Seattle, Washington because James Cromwell of Succession fame. Let me stop you right there. Yeah. I care for his character, but I want to stop short of Succession Star, James Cromwell, and all of these stories. Really? You don't think so?

I, robot. Sure, but lately, that's where I've seen him. And the reason I'm associating his performance is. Starbucks, which for the people at home, he glued himself to a Starbucks counter because he's protesting beef. Well, he's really protesting dairy. The surcharge on the vegan milk, which is kind of sneaky. They're like, they're fucking taxing people on the on the nut milks. The tax in the nut milks, which is totally irresponsible of Starbucks. I agree with James on this one, but there's so many things to be gluing ourselves to about before we do this one. I totally

respect it. But when you hang out with PETA, I get a little bit nervous. I'm like, here's the crazy thing, Succession. He's practically a method actor. He's practically who he is on Succession in real life. The fucking guy glued himself to a Starbucks counter. Yeah, big Greenpeace guy. Big Greenpeace guy, dude. You know what's funny though? He was in Babe. Do you remember that? Yes, I do. Yeah, the, uh, the, uh, the, the, uh, the gentle farmer that almost slaughtered Babe. Yeah. Like, damn near killed the the fucking protagonist of the movie. He was in secretariat, dude. Here's a quote from James Carmel.

I think the larger issue is the treatment of dairy cows in industrial context is inhumane and it's deleterious to the planet. I can hear his character in succession saying this to Logan. These animals require an incredible amount of water, which is very true. That's the thing. I want to stop there. I have a water charity.

Fucking cows take up a lot of water, dude. Golf courses in cows. Cows, dude. Cattle and golf courses. Cows also contribute to global warming heavily or to climate change heavily. This is their far. To us. Their farts. Right. Yeah. Their farts are methane and there's literally billions of these animals.

So in a way if James Cromwell wants to save the planet, we got to kill some cows and eat them. Yeah. That's the way I feel about it. Mm-hmm. There's a balance to be struck in here, but guy was in Babe and he was in secretariat. Remember we talked to Steve about the horses dying and that sort of thing? Yeah. Well, who does?

It was maybe my favorite line in podcast history. Macon's like, yeah, but what about the horses when they fuck up and then they have to kill them or they get hurt and then they kill him? I don't like that. Well, no one likes that. Next question. I don't like it when they have to kill the horse, when the horse falls and breaks a leg. They give him that Joffrey. Who does?

Who does? I mean, come on. Everyone's last night are tonight. We had the NFL schedule release the last couple days. Yeah, as Taylor LeWan would say big fucking whoop. Big flipping whoop. The last couple days, we've got a couple leaks. Got some good matchups that we've seen, some okay matchups, some not so good matchups.

When you were an employee of the National Football League, what did you keep an eye out for when the schedule was? released okay so like you you see the teams you're gonna play you know who's in your division right as a rusher but uh you also want to know uh when and where you're playing uh those out of division teams you know like you've got the nfc north but there's a big difference between seeing that team in september up at lambo or seeing that team in december up in lambo uh not just for cold but for also for like the surface so as a rusher you're looking at things like that you're looking at how many dome teams you're playing you're looking at how many day games you're playing prime time games when i was with the rams we didn't really look for prime time games

we were kind of like uh i think the jets have one primetime game this year they're playing the uh jaguars on thursday night december 22nd which is nice mark that on your calendar remember me talking about this game like is what will matter at that point December 22nd jets but 2023 draft 2023 draft so we were kind of in those situations, being an adult. We were kind of in those, being an adult right now, we were kind of in those situations in St. Louis. We didn't have a lot of primetime games. But certainly, like, as I got later in my career playing in Philly in New England, you know, be careful what you wish for, because then you're going to see six of those motherfuckers on there, and not all of them are on the East Coast. Some of them are in like Arizona. I can remember in New England, we went out there,

my first and last year in New England and we played the Arizona Cardinals who were pretty fucking good at the beginning of that season and we beat him in the desert and kind of a shootout with Jimmy G on a missed field goal at the end of the game so we needless to say

we got home at 7 a.m. Like that's something that's very disruptive to any football player and is really going to put you in like a physical and mental funk for a week. So you look at things like that. You look at hey, now teams have international games when are those? Like when's our buy week? That's a big one. Now, skip right over the bye week.

Like, you don't want a buy week too early. You don't want it too late. You had a sack lunch in the desert that night. I had a sack lunch in the desert. Your first game, that was week one. Yeah, in New England, until they changed the defense, I got the game ball like three weeks in a row. And then they were like, yeah, let's put you a three technique. See how you like that. You were talking about, they were saving you. They were talking about free agency, I guess. you're talking about primetime games how about being the Colts

since 2017 the Colts have played 14 primetime games 11 of them have been on the road ooh that's fucked up and what do people have against the city of Indianapolis I don't know maybe it's the lighting in that stadium at night I hate there's that's the thing about

a prime time game if you if I was zapped back into an NFL body right now and you gave me a choice between like hey you're going to play a noon game or one o'clock game. I'm thinking Midwest, like back in St. Louis, like it was early to wake up for those games. Or you can play a primetime game.

We're not gonna tell you the context or anything. Like, do you take the risk on the one end of it or the security of a noon game? I take a noon game any day of the week because the bad end of the stick on a, on a fucking game in the desert in Arizona, that that field goal goes in and I'm on a plane with Bill Belichick until seven in the morning.

Like, fuck that, dude. It was light when we landed. in Foxboro. So like, yeah, there's no such thing as a nap. Like you're gonna get home and you gotta be in the facility by, what, like three o'clock or something? They give you like a little nap time

or something or that day off. What am I gonna do with that day off? Nothing, I'm a zombie. So you look at stuff like that and you look at the tackles you play. You look at the quarterbacks. I'll tell you the number one thing I used to look at, how mobile was a quarterback?

How many mobile quarterbacks am I going to play? Yeah, we looked at all that stuff. we did you know the timing of the games people say what's the big deal taylor le juan says what's the big deal i think he tweeted that you know to kind of be a shit disturber but rich isan absolutely dunked on taylor did you see this i don't think i saw the dunk this is fucking funny taylor said who cares about the NFL schedule the release and tag the NFL and he's like shots fired and then uh and then the quote tweet from rich eisen was it's just window dressing for content much like doing a podcast

and a bus that doesn't have an engine. Nice. That's good. Yeah. That's good. Go blue. Good for Rich. Go blue. Yeah. So, blue on blue. So anyways, I think that's the whole thing. It's the timing. It's the when. You know kind of the who. It's knowing the context of all these games that you're about to play.

The NFL, of course, has done a masterful job of making this into a thing. I'm on Taylor the Wan's side. If some of these leaks are accurate, and by the time, you're listening to this, you know, there's a report that we have three indoor games on Thanksgiving once again. Dude, that's the worst. We always talk about this. I mean, Thanksgiving is, it's like, when people play Thanksgiving football in the back fucking yard, they don't go to an indoor facility to do it. Dude, they go out there, they get some grass stains, they go out there, they throw the pig skit around. That shit is lame as hell watching, usually, and here's the worst part, you're cooped up inside.

the weather might not be great. It could be super cold. There could be a bunch of kids. Like, you're drinking all day. Like, the only imperfection of Thanksgiving is watching indoor football to me. You could make that infinitely better if you stick that shit outside. And if we've always got to get Detroit. Because I'm not outside.

I'm inside all day. It's about me, the fan. I need some out. Even if I'm not outside, I need the appearance of some outside. Yeah. Detroit can go on the road on Thanksgiving. Yeah. Detroit could definitely go on the road of Thanksgiving.

We don't need to see Ford Field. every Thanksgiving. I would be thankful if we didn't have to see the board field every Thanksgiving. So we've got three indoor Thanksgiving games which continues to be like a fucking pattern. And the Giants are back.

Looks to be an eight and nine season for the G-Men. Looks to be an eight and nine season for the G-Men. I haven't looked at the Eagles schedule leaked but I know there's one there's one, all these leaks, man. If I could use a diaper, huh?

Ah! Is there a, a is there a plumber in the building? Bro, like, they're like, here's a leak. You're going to get fucking, you're going to get Vikings Lions week 18. I'm like, oh, put that back in the diaper, dude. I don't want to hear about that.

Like, I don't need that. I don't need that league. They're leaking week 17 games that I don't even care about. I'm like, Jesus. So we've got the Thanksgiving games. By the way, talking about the giant schedule. Didn't your Andrew Thomas have something to say about that? Yeah, he said he was excited to play on Thanksgiving,

that it's his favorite holiday. He said his only concern was that he might be thinking about food during the entire game, but that that was all good, that a hungry dog hunts best. I've heard some, I've heard some variation of that somewhere, Andrew. You know, nothing like biting the center's content,

taking his IP, taking the IP of the center that's right down the road from you in the same division. Shots fired. but I saw Pats Vikings on Thanksgiving. Like why do the Pats have to go to that stadium to play? Why aren't we watching that game in New England? Cold, wind, rain, whatever they talk about up there. Christmas games, which I think is a cool thing,

it's a great way to big dick the NBA, right? Which is the only time NBA players get big dicked is when nobody's watching their Christmas games. This is just the NFL being like, I don't need this toy, but I'm going to play. with this toy. It is on a Sunday, to be fair. No, I know, but let me talk about Broncos at Rams. I can't wait to see Russell Wilson's Christmas fit. Oh, Broncos at Rams right. And we got, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for talking about Big Dict. Broncos at Seahawks, week one. Yeah. God's team. Is Nick Foles playing

for the Seahawks? Maybe Nick Foles, bro, I think maybe Nick Foles might be a Seahawk here soon, dude. Nick's into that bulletproof coffee. He's like, I only drink one cup of coffee. He's like, I only drink one cup of coffee in the morning, that's it. And you put a little collagen protein in there, and then I'm good till dinner. And then I go win a Super Bowl heroically. That's Nick Foles. He's gonna be up there making that coffee money.

He's gonna be ungluing James Cromwell from that Starbucks register. Bro, Nick Foles, Pete Carroll, go get him right now, man. Go get him right now. Nick Foles, he's on the street, is he not? He said his goodbyes in Chicago. He can be yours. right now in Seattle.

Here's the update. Nobody was looking forward to. There were two Christmas Day games in 2016 when, uh, okay, how many this year? Last fell on a Sunday. Three. Three this year.

See, we're, we're, we're creeping. What we're doing is, yeah, we're just creeping up on the NBA here. Yep. Before you know it,

there'll be 12. It'll be NBA on New Year's Eve. Yeah, then, yeah, well, there's New Year's games too this year, uh, which is cool. I like the New Year's, years games. Vikings at Packers. So you get that outdoor. You get Saints at Eagles. You get a nice

outdoor football game. And then you get Bears at Lions to make you feel better about yourself because you just pissed away your, your evening getting shitface because of a calendar and false promises that are never going to happen. So yeah, watch the Bears and the Lions. So week 18, we've got some leaks. Yeah. I mean, like, listen, we're not getting everything here. Oh, by the way, I meant to touch on this one, commanders and Jags opener. The prodigal son returns, bro. Where's the game? Well, I wish it was in Jacksonville,

so the prodigal son could return to Doug Peterson. So Carson Wentz could return to Doug Peterson. We could say the prodigal son returns. Uh-huh. But we can't. So instead it's the... The prodigal son hosts his old coach. Not quite the same room.

Yeah, dude. But regardless, that's going to be one of the fucking dopest handshakes that everybody's going to be waiting to see. Reading into the handshake. What other handshakes are we, McCarthy and Rogers, right? Yeah. We get them this year together. If McCarthy lasts that long, we get McCarthy and Roger.

Hustle and Bustle with Pete Carroll, week one. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, Russell and Pete. That's going to be a good handshake. That's a good one. Big embrace, big fake embrace. Big, yeah, yeah, we like each other. Yeah. Big, we like each other energy.

Huge. Yeah, no question. we will be in in Mexico City I'm going to speak that new existence for Cardinals, Niners and maybe Broncos Jags in London. Fuck it, Reed. God's going to give us a spaceship

to head over to London. Oh no, the airplanes go to London, Reed. Well, we want a spaceship. You just do an airplane. Or maybe you do a rocket like the Tua emoji. That's right. But anyways, I'm not talking about that. I'm taking the high road for now.

Broncos, Jags in London Maybe by then Taylor will pay up his bet With the inflatable doll Is Taylor gonna be doing that in New York City now? I guess so there'll be a lot of our eyes Yeah, if Taylor's moving soon, right? Reed? Yeah, we're gonna send the doll with him

He quit his job to avoid paying up that back We don't have to send the doll with him, dude When he gets to New York, we will announce That since he has not paid up the bet in Charlottesville We're not gonna make him come back to Boto's Bagels here in Charlottesville like we're going to send them to one of the New York restaurants to do it. No boo. Sure.

Send them to the, we'll send them to the meat packing district. Super Bowls in Glendale. Another schedule league here. Seattle has been eliminated from the playoffs. That's good. Thank you. I appreciate that.

That's what I have to do is give you time, give you the joke like earlier in the day, and then you'll actually laugh at it. Nah, things are funny to me. I just don't laugh. So that's everything. I think that we gave you the whole schedule. Whatever comes out tonight at 8 p.m., who gives a fuck?

Yep. You know, as Taylor Luan said, you know, we'll stretch this into another segment on Tuesday, I promise you. We'll react, right? Okay. So we just gave the NFL.

we just paid our ties to the NFL. Wow. Yeah. Good word. Okay. Well, I would know all about it. Like the Friday 13th thing, you didn't know any of that stuff. No.

I knew all that stuff. Yeah. Bible reader. Yeah. You even brought up the prodigal son, which is one of the parables of Jesus. Obviously a parable. Oh, nice. Obviously a parable.

And what about the Nicene Creed? Sure. Yeah, it was good. Because they had to work it out. It was like a treaty, right? Yeah. You know, it's kind of like, we got to do things this way now. It was, it was Pontch's pilot.

Family football. Yeah. Pontch's pilot. Yeah. Yeah. And Martin Luther and. Martin Luther, the guy that, didn't he go, no, I have that wrong. Macon's like 1,200 years off.

Yeah, the 1,200 years. Martin Luther's the printing press guy. No, you're thinking of Eli Whitney. No, he's correct. He's correct. I'm correct about Martin Luther, bro.

Martin Luther used to go around and he started the Luther in church. He would... Martin Luther would put things on doors. He put lists on doors. Feces. Yeah, his feces. He would thumbtack them to doors all around. Feces.

Feces. He said feces. How many feces? How many feces? 15. Guy a lot of fiber. Jesus. Wasn't it 95?

This has been religion. Okay. Hey, guys. Let's get into best and worst place. Religion is awesome and I'll tell you why. Tell me all about it. These laughs.

Yeah, dude. Yeah. I'm not laughing at religion. I'm laughing with religion. There are some funny parables. No, yeah, great content. Yeah. There's no eye and team, but there is one in Indeed, and that's the hiring partner you need

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Best and worst plane ride. They're back, dude. Yeah, NBA edition. I feel warm inside, dude. This league. I'm just going to say this. I was sitting there watching, okay, we'll get to the fucking the game that just made me feel like it was 2010 again.

We'll get to the Bucks and the Celtics. But the Memphis ass-whipping was, I was captivated, dude. I could not turn the TV off. I was just keeping it on to see if it would get to 60, which is a really cool thing to say and not be joking about. Like I was like sitting there watching it was 57. I was on the Warriors minus four. Jesus Christ.

Well, you didn't have to sweat that bet. Yeah. How do you stay motivated in a sport down 95 to 56, like somewhere in the third quarter? It's easy in a football game to play hard during a blowout because every second you could get embarrassed on TV. Like your masculinity. Like I could get just dumped trucked by somebody. We're in four minute mode. Dude, I have like Mackay Beckton or Trent Brown lined up across from me.

Like I don't have a choice. I can't check out. Like I have played super hard in games where like, people are like, what's the point? They want to give you a medal over it. It's because I don't have a fucking choice, dude. Start going to have to be. You get hurt.

You get hurt. And in basketball, like, I don't know how these guys are still running up and down the court. I would just stop, I would just walk. I would just walk. I would just walk. The third quarter of that game, they're up 45 points. What the fuck is the point, dude? There's no survival threat.

And I got to get on the worst plane ride tomorrow morning, luckily. and go back to Golden States a four-hour flight, dude. Yeah, counterpoint. Not a whole lot of game stress. Coach Steve Kerr coming back, one would think. Still no jaw on the other side, and you can close them out at home.

No question. That's the funny thing about it is the Sacramento Kings announced that they are going to hire Mike Brown, and then Mike Brown has this one game as a replacement coach for Steve Kerr, who's out with COVID. Oh, no.

And that's what happens. Well, he had two. He went one and one. Yeah, yeah. Oh, thank God for that one. Yeah, or else. Holy shit. That would have been real bad. That's the type of game where, you know, like I thought they might be flying out of the game.

Silly me, they're not NFL players. Their coaches actually think things through. But these fuckers, man, they definitely were taking shower pills to get out of that building as quick as possible. You know a shower pill is? No. Shower pill is like slang in the NFL for when you're not going to take a shower. You're just going to walk out of the building and go shower at your domicile or somewhere else. because of the communal aspect

or you're just too lazy or maybe you don't want to be seen after a 60 point went or loss you want to even on the road you're going to sit in your stink you want to throw your weird outfit on no because I wouldn't stink after a 60 point loss I've stopped running in the third quarter my sweat if there was any would be totally dry

that seemed to be contradicting the part about being opposite Trent Brown and I am that's the point the point is that it's much it's much easier in football because there's an existential threat of dying. Got it. Like, Trent Brown could kill me if I was like, ah, fucking I'm good. But if I just let Desmond Bain go on a break. You're just avoiding a poster, yeah.

Plus, I can get the cherry pick on the other side. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Right. Outlet. Exactly. You see what I'm saying now. It's harder to play hard in a basketball blowout than a football blowout because there's no existential threat.

There's no fighter flight. You shouldn't play hard at that. pointing a blowout you got game six at home that's your whole focus i'm shower pillin dude i'm getting the fuck out of there whoop that trick yeah draymond green hear them play whoop that trick dude so raymond green was dancing during the whip that trick song was he yeah like he was dancing and enjoying it with the crowd which is like one of the weirdest taunts i've ever seen at the end of the game yeah they're down 50 that i love draymond because he has the right idea it doesn't fucking matter flush it and move on and certainly and draymond would know what i'm talking about here

football is a scarier game to get blown out in than basketball. Like, you know, there's nothing that's going to hurt me. We just got to let this thing tick down to zero. I was hoping at one point they gave up a four-point playdown 55, and I was like, they need to start putting in Memphis celebrities. That'll be sick because there were guys on the court that I, you know, Darren Bates, Project Pat. Dog.

The Lawler guy from wrestling. Jerry? Yeah, Jerry Lawler. Warriors minus 410 on Friday night. This might be the first time I say, Frick it. Here's $10,000 one bet. Okay, do that.

You think that'll wind up burned? Yeah. Really? Well, it's a lot of risk out there for a team that kind of skated through the last round. A lot of people would call them kind of a little lucky to be here. I'd be scared to do it without knowing the coaching situation. Hmm. I mean.

Okay. I trust Steve Carr wrote a job. Jet ski with Steve Kerr. I don't know Mike Brown. There's no Jahn Morant. Back at home. Tech Bros. San Francisco. During the course of the regular season, Memphis's overall plus minus without John Morant was not that much different than when, then. Well, then they won a lot. They had a good record without John. If you didn't, if you didn't see it last night, they won by 60.

Yeah. That's fair. It was actually 39. I remember the, this is my favorite line of the whole game. This is they announced that the game is a run, a 100 to 56 run. wrote that down. It's good. I mean, um, this,

this was truly fascinating to watch. That's the worst plane ride. I don't care how nice the plane is. It's still a bad plane ride the next day. Well, uh, they might have, actually,

they might have got their ass kick so bad. It boomeranged and was like a good plane ride because everybody's just so goofy. Everybody was like, that was, but fucking indeed. But fucking indeed. And, and we're minus four 10 Friday night.

We're not going to, we're not going to, we're not going to, And it's going to put some chickens on. But the best plane ride, dude, what? What about like, what about like, what about like 2,000 chickens? Sure. I'll do it just for the content.

At minus 410. And I'm, and I'm waging we are waging 2,000. We stand to win 487. Think about what we could do with $487. We can do a lot with it. Clay Thompson's got to make some threes. I mean, that's going to happen. Yeah, he's going to do that.

We love Clay Thompson. Hey, but the best plane ride, that's got to be the bucks. man. Talk about a Randy Marsh balls and a wheelbarrow tight team. It was a good tweet. Yeah, it was a good tweet. Never gets enough credit. I don't think I liked it actually, but I'm in my head. A lot of people I think with my tweets are like good tweet and they just pass it by. They're busy laughing at my tweets. Yeah. But anyways, I just, I have not been so excited to watch a basketball game in a long time. There were people bleeding, bro. Yeah. People were bleeding. The NBA is back. Yonis who absolutely him and the bucks got punched in the mouth at home. It was at home a couple nights ago.

In game four, they got punched in the mouth. Al Horford was like big boy in people. That was the night I realized Al Horford's younger than us, which was sobering. Yeah, he is. I saw that too. Bro, I thought he was like 39. Yeah.

He had the whole season off last year in Oklahoma City. So maybe he's feeling fresh. He's taking that year. He's taking that year. He's taking that year abroad. So they got punched in the mouth, like legit game four. And I was like, I don't know, man. This Boston team's really tough.

And then they come out in game five. And I'm not really even a Bucks fan. But by the end of that game, I was like really into the Bucks, bro. Because for them to battle back without Middleton, down all those fucking points, they got, as Matt noted, they have two white American players

that they're featuring heavily. So add that to the list of things that are tough for them. Pat Connett in a famous greenlight pod joke, the punchline of a famous GLP joke with JJ. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pat Conner. Yeah. That was good.

Yeah. Somebody said this is the hardest they've ever laughed at that. A fan? Yeah. I saw an Apple review said the... A lot of a hater. That's nice. So they got all of this stuff working against them.

And there was a point last night. I think they were down like five or six points. They had just missed a bunch of shots, had a bunch of offensive rebounds and couldn't capitalize. Go down the other end of the floor. Al Horford catches an offensive rebound on a putback and just fucking teabagagaggs somebody. and you're like, the roof goes off and you're like, okay, they're dead. The garden was electric.

They weren't dead. They have, I mean, they have championship experience. Like, in both the second and third quarter, the games could have gotten away from them. And they made incredible plays. And then down the stretch, like, who would you want more than Drew Holiday on your team? Like, if you say, like, hey, I got to get a defensive stop against a guard. Like, Drew Holiday is the perfect compliment to Janus. Well, here's the deal.

First, I want to say this, Janus, Janus is, low-key and asshole in a really good way, dude. The other night I saw where him and Marcus Smart were tangled up on the ground and Marcus tried to help him up and Janus like kicked him off but acted like, you know, he wasn't kicking him off. Like Janus plays nice guy a lot. That great smile and effect. Chick-fil-A, that sort of thing.

Like, oh, he's funny guys. He's so, he's so like, he's so accessible. But he's also kind of a fucking asshole. I think the NBA kind of hardened him because he had to go through all that hate for being like, people were hating on him last year bro yeah he's got like some of those intricacies like you mentioned on the ground and he's just a fucking bully like he just just goes right through people sometimes finishing with a dunk over them that just takes your breath away now I want to talk about the maybe my favorite player in the league bob porters Bob porters Bobby fucking porters dude who I also thought was

35 he's only you know thinking back I should know this he's like not even 30 yet um but he's got the he's got the by the way stick around for our accessory draft after jeff passing in a little bit is going to be lit it's partially um inspired by joel and beads mask bobby porters's fucking arm band that says bp on it bro in times new roman like bobby porthus is a is a is a is a multi-millionaire and his arm band has a tiny black BP written on it dudes in the league seem like they're a little scared of bobby Portis. People should be scared of Bobby fucking Portis, dude. I heard Bobby Portis broke Mertich's face. Yeah. Mertitch is a good player. He's like NBA level player, but he's still just in Spain because he's afraid of Bobby Portis. Bro like, why are you stuck in Spain? COVID regulations.

No, Bobby Portis. I'm afraid of Bobby Portis. Full length tea. And by full length is a weird way to put it. I mean, it goes to his elbows. Oh, the tea. Yeah, the tea. He's got the t-shirt. He's got the the glasses like he's saw in some wood. He's got the wristband just below his elbow. Yeah. He's got the thick headband. I mean, he's the fucking man, dude. Bobby Portis is the man.

But that putback was huge. Janus, he cleaned up, Janus's only real, real, you know, miss down the stretch, was that second free throw. And that was to tie the game, I think, of 108. And then Bobby Portis snatched it out of the air and put it back to go up 109, 108, and then gave Drew Holliday an opportunity to make, That really awesome block, but also it was who it was against in the situation and where it was, like the context of that block. Like, Marcus Smart is a war daddy, dude.

Like, I just feel like he's a football. Like, I want to play football with Marcus Smart. Now I feel the same way about Drew Holiday because in the biggest moment, he just stepped up. And we were joking on the plane because I had to do an action network thing. And I actually always wondered this and I was afraid to get the answer and I was okay with this. one of the action network questions was who's your NBA comp and Matt said Drew Holiday

and at first I was like that's okay that's pretty good and then watching the game the other night I'm like fuck yeah dude Drew Holiday best player ever how clutch is this motherfucker dude so this is a Drew Holiday podcast and he made two of the most clutch plays the game

he has steel to close that thing out I mean it was like a Drew Holiday show the steel was great but the block that he kept in bounds and then threw off smart is like especially given the time and score one of the best defensive plays you'll ever see. And if you go back to like last year's Olympics, 2020, like Drew Holiday was the second or third best player on that team.

But he can guard anybody. Like he's guarding Marcus Smart. He's guarding Jason Tatum. Like as long as it's not a center, he can literally switch on to anybody. Nobody can post him up. And his offense is very good. He's a jack of all trades.

I really like the guy. And he's always been really classy. So I'm really happy to see Drew Holiday have a big moment. And his band's claim to fame, he's Lauren Holliday's husband. That's true. Yeah. Same thing with me and my lovely wife.

That's right. And he does some charity stuff too. I think everything's lining up here. And I hope he doesn't make too many more plays. He's got a brother in the league. He's got a brother in the league. I hope he doesn't make too many more plays because then we can't have this thing anymore. Yeah, I don't know if the comp works anymore.

Yeah, it doesn't work anymore. Fuck, dude. This was his night, though. This was a Drew Holiday night. So congratulations to the Bucks. I'm sure they're listening. Hey, Kingston, do the people know that you live and die with the Boston Celtics that you cry when they lose? I've become more of like a Roblo in an NBA fan overtime.

I don't even know why. It's just like the full on allegiance to Boston that I had back in the day with like Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett. I had a Paul Pierce poster on the wall in college. He was the only poster. Because I just thought he was a badass. From the poop game? The poop game had me, bro. I was like, he had me at the poop game, bro.

Sitting there in the chair. Yeah, it wasn't even a post. poster it was like an eight by 10 with the NBA shiny thing on it that tells you that like you're buying a real picture like a print uh so yeah the truth i had the i had some truth gear but i don't like the celtics like i'm not a celtics fan so but screw those teams let larry bird growing up you all you talk about was larry bird you're right though maybe the celtics are the team that you hold their fan base against them the most because they're racist well things like that but also like I don't want to paint with too broad a brush, but I think like,

Patriots, mass holes. Yeah, I mean, like, listen, they're an aggressive folk. But the players are cool as shit. Marcus Smart, Jason Tatum from the 314, the guy that Whalen thought was me on TV. Cice. Guys like that. Jalen Brown's really freaking good. Gailen Brown.

They had other cool players throughout the years. and you know. Well, you just mentioned Larry Bird. Did you guys see that they're now going to give out an Eastern Conference Finals? MVP named after Larry Bird. I thought they knew it after Bob Coosie. What did they name after Bob Coosy? The Eastern Conference Championship is now named after Bob Coosie,

even though he wasn't a 40% career vehicle shooter. He couldn't go left. Yeah. Couldn't go left, bro. J.J. Reddick ate Mad Dog's lunch there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And in those replies, which is legit, somebody on the internet saying, you know, there are good players who have more recently played than Bob Coosie. Right, right.

We could name something after Michael Jordan. Debt left shrimp. Michael Jordan. Let's do, debt left shrimp. DeLefshrum. The list is inless. I'm just saying, like, arbitrarily, that guy would probably give Bob Coosy that work. Not even a question.

I think Pat Conninton would give Bob Coosy that work. Yeah, of course. So, like, what the fuck are we doing here? And by the way, MVP's Eastern Conference, Western Conference, here's what I think should have make. If you win the title, you get both those. But you don't get to take that trophy with you if you don't win the whole thing.

It's like for champions, oh, he won that too. So he was great. I do think it gives context looking back to say like, oh yeah, that guy had an amazing, you know, championship game and football like NFC championship. Like that's a big deal too. It'd be cool to have something that said like, hey, you know, the Super Bowl MVP's cool, but like maybe...

You have like game balls and shit from coaches, though. That's pretty cool. Aaron Holiday is also a Drew Holiday, brother. Yeah. Aaron Holiday's three? Yeah. There's three. Almost two.

Okay. So... Although those flights are a little bit different. So like, while Milwaukee definitely has the best flight and Golden State has the worst flight, like... Well, there were two games. There's pressure on Milwaukee now. Like, when you're going back on that flight, you now have to handle your business in game

six to win. this series or you're kind of fucked. So it's like you're happy you won, but at the same time, it's like, I also think you can argue that I think you can argue that Memphis is, or Golden State's hype. Yeah. They're going back to the West Coast. Minus 410. They feel like we're minus 410.

Maybe we do like $80,000. Of what on them? Yeah. I'll put a lot of money on them. Okay. If you want to do this together. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'm not.

Aaron Bates is never going to come back on the show, dude. All right. So, Makin. We got two games that are going to happen tonight. Nobody's going to see it. First off, did we curse Joel and B'd with that whole thing the other day? It was a little bit premature. Yeah, we knew.

No, I think they won last night, game seven in Miami. Okay, sweet. Oh, I love that. Oh, my God, I love that. And then your take on the hug heard around the world now. So yeah, we're calling it unwanted hugs. Hugate. Yeah.

Which hugs, when they're not, guys that have T-shirts like free hugs, like get the fuck away from me. So I totally get it. Like, you're not supposed to hug people that don't want hugs. Like free hugs is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Like free hugs. Like who, free hugs. Did I ask?

There's a guy on the street here in our hometown who wears a blindfold and stands with his arms out and it says free hugs. Exactly. You walk up and you hug him and I hugged him because Meg was afraid of him and I was like, let me show you something. I'm gonna go get hugged by this. What year? Like before the pandemic, bro. And it was cool?

Yeah, it was fine. He didn't stab me or feel, see where my balls were or anything like that. guy just wanted a free hug yeah but i'll tell you what though like unless i'm proven a point like i'm not going up to that guy dude what do you think about the situation now i i've got more questions now than answers right so do we have more footage or not you know what we need to do is cats running up to people we need to reach out to the family and hugging them that mom yeah we should we should reach out to the young man's mom you know i'll reach out to the young man's mom you can get in touch with her i don't know but I'll try.

I'll sure try. I bet the offender was on that drug, Molly, because that's when, nah, for real, because that's when people get all friendly. They do. Yeah, introverts turn to extroverts. Yeah, no question.

No question. That's a good point. Thanks. Maybe it was MDMA. Yeah. American Airlines Arena. Get high here, like the airplanes.

All right, so we got Jeff Passing. If you don't like baseball that much, that makes many, many of us. All right, but Jeff Passon makes me like baseball, like all the time. I love baseball at the right time, and some days I'm not that into it,

but if Jeff Passon's on the Zoom, I'm really into baseball. Honestly, one of the most interesting guests we have on this show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's plenty of non-baseball too. There's plenty of non-baseball. And also the baseball stuff

we're about to talk about is so like, it's for the casual, because we are casual. Yeah, we're not going to even mention the shift. Yeah, we're not going to mention the shift. We're not going to mention WIP. Nope, we're not. But here's the deal.

Stick around after Jeff Passing because we're going to talk about some football. I know some of you guys are hardcore football fans that just wanted to find out, you know, when the Lions play the Vikings in December or like when the Jags and the Colts play. And you came here for the schedule release stuff. And maybe you just sat through some NBA. But like really sit with us for some baseball as we just talked about. Like it's going to be interesting. And then after that, we're going to talk about Brady and Tua.

and we've got a big draft, so stick around. And now, television's Jeff Passon. I started taking athletic greens because I wanted to see what all the hype was about. With one delicious scoop of athletic greens, you're absorbing 75 high-quality vitamins, minerals, whole-food source, superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to help you start your day right.

This special blend of ingredients supports your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus, and aging. And it tastes great. It doesn't taste like it's super healthy. It kind of has a mild tropical taste that I actually look forward to each morning. I recommend it to the whole green light crew, especially Cowboy Reed.

And now everybody's feeling spry. Athletic Greens uses the best of the best products based on the latest science with constant product iterations and third-party testing. AG1 is a small micro-habit with big benefits. It's one thing you can do every single day to take great care of yourself. Athletic Greens is also a climate neutral certified company. To make it easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune-supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase.

All you have to do is visit athletic greens.com slash greenlight. Again, that is athletic greens.com slash greenlight to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. Joining us now is our only baseball friend. Jeff, pass it. Yeah. Yeah, I'm so excited, man. This is great.

He's one of the best guests we got. Jeff, what's up, man? How are you, you fellas? It's good to be here. Glad to talk a little bit of baseball. I appreciate being the only one. It makes me feel special, honestly. So talk to us about opening day.

Can I actually change a subject before we talk about opening day, which was like a month ago? That was the joke. That was the joke. Whose dip was it? It was mine. It was just a little dip, spin. You drank your own spit? What's that fucking...

Well, here's the deal. Before I drank my own spit, it was... I was drinking my own spit. So here's the deal. Like, you know, it's not what I chose to do, but it's not the worst thing that could have happened. It's not like I drank somebody else's spit. And, you know, the taste of Codiac Wintergreen is so strong that it kind of like shrouded

the spit taste. You know what I mean? No, I don't because I'm not a dumb ass who drinks his own ditch spit. You know, it's okay. I'm sure a lot of the... dumbasses you cover and probably drank dip spit. I'm sure there's a guy this weekend in an MLB clubhouse that drank dip spit. I'm putting the over under is at two and I'm taking the over. No question. Right? Probably worse than that. Didn't you guys outlawed dip out silhouettes?

Like you can't put, can you put that in your pocket? I theoretically, but no, you know, it's baseball. Like if you don't, if you don't dip, you're an outcast. So that being said, I'm going to take the under. because we're grown-ass people and we know where we're putting our spit. Yeah. And we don't drink it. I mean, hold on, does that say liquid death on it? Yeah, and we're talking about 30. Is that a can full of dip spit?

No, this is water. This is water. So here's the deal, dude. I've been on this earth 37 times. I've only drank dips spit twice. And I've dipped every day. And I was going to ask you, Jeff, have you ever packed a fatty? Hey, you know what?

I'm not a dip guy. I tried it when I tried it when I was like 12 or 13. and did just didn't didn't do it to a cigar guy yeah occasional cigarette is okay wow whoa yeah that's what time no cigarettes before midnight Jeff I mean maybe you all right so then I'm gonna dig in here what what's your what's your cigarette of choice uh American spirit yellow they take forever they take forever you could be working on an American spirit for six years dude for an entire MLB season. If you're going to have them infrequently,

you might as well savor them. There's a baseball writer out there who the first time took a drag on an American Spirit yellow, was so enthralled by it. He said, these things are so good. They must be healthy for you. And we've been like,

he calls them whole wheat cigarettes. Well, they're local. They're local. The packaging, the messaging. They're banning my favorite cigarette. Did you hear they're banning Newports? I did hear that, actually. It's because they've been marketing new ports to black people for generations and getting

him hooked on it. It's pretty horrendous. Yeah. But at 1 a.m. I'm shocked at the tobacco. I'm a really tasty cigarette at 1.m. for me. That's a very tasty. You're a mental guy.

I'm a mental guy. I'm a total mental guy. Guilty is charged. And I've broken them. You can break the, the midnight rule if you're having a menthol. Menthal is a daytime cigarette, too. Let's talk about baseball. I want to ask you this, dude.

Dude. Last year I felt like the Braves were the coolest team. Like to me at least, the Braves were really cool. They were like, man, this team has got it. Vibes. They have great vibes. We talk vibes here a lot. So the Angels, man, like they seem like a really vibey team right now. They have two of the best players in the league. They had a guy throw a no hitter the other night. Same division as the Astros. So when they beat the Astros, everybody cheers.

They have a fucking rock formation outfield with a waterfall. Are they the coolest team in baseball? where do they rank this year as far as like that team has it they're cool yeah if you're watching a team on a nightly basis they're the one that you're going to go out and pick because they have the two best players in baseball mike trout is back he's healthy he's listen no disrespect to babe ruth or to barry bonds or to hank aaron or willie mays or anybody else who played before i believe mike trout is the best baseball player who's ever lived. Wow.

I do. I think the competition is better than it's ever been, and he has been playing MVP, not like MVP conversation, MVP caliber baseball for a full consecutive decade now. And listen, I get that he's been injured last year, especially. It was a rough year for him, had a muscle injury that kept him out for the last four months, I think, of the season. But when he is on the field, there is nobody better. than him and staking that claim when you're on the same team as show hey otani who's doing things

that we haven't seen since babe ruth since double duty rackliff uh and and and others in in the negro leagues i mean it's pretty amazing what he is capable of doing and what he's gone out there and done well i also think it's really cool that mike trout comes to eagles games and like sits like not in the suites mike trout sits in like the seats which i love so So big, big point in his favor there. And then also I do think you make the Babe Ruth point. It looks like if you look at Mike Trout, he looks like he could have been born at any time and played baseball. Yes.

He looks like he could have been, you know, like in a black and white picture in the Depression and then he picked up a bat. Chris, if you look at Mike Trout in person, he looks like he should be playing middle linebacker for the Eagles. Like he's, I mean, he's 6-2, 240, and, you know, in his prime when he was at his fastest and he's not far behind it. It was probably running like a four or five. maybe a 4-4.

Like he is a freakish athlete who just happens to have picked baseball. And, you know, it's pretty damn incredible to see him on a daily basis do what he does because he's great at just about everything. What's the weak link for the Angels? Is it Danny Glover calling the shots from the dugout? They have a movie too. It's probably the Unis. The Unis is what we were thinking they need to go.

back. I was thinking the only uncool thing about the Angels is the LA Angels now is the uniforms dude and we went back and we looked at the 77 threads. The 79 through like 92 with the halos. Yeah, I got the halo on there. That's my favorite one.

I mean, shit, you could go back to the 90s ones. You go back to, you know, Angels and the outfields. You go back to the blue, the navy blue sleeves, they'd be better than these. Do you agree? And are there uniforms, Jeff, that you think should go back? The Angels uniform is in offensive to me. Like, it's not the, it's not the worst now compared to what you've seen in the past.

My, my number one far and away is the Houston Astros and their rainbow uniform. Like, that's, that's the one you got to go back to. That was a, that's a no-brainer, dude. Gorgeous uniform. Chicago white, I love the 80s Chicago White Sox. That just says socks right across the chest there. Like, that's a good one. Angels, yeah, it would be, it would be fine. I, I, I, think the most offensive thing about the angels is that they call themselves the Los Angeles Angels. That is offensive. Dude, you're in Orange County. Just wear it. Just own it. Like, Orange County's not Los Angeles. I'm sorry. It's a weird place, too. Like, Orange County is like a different area, dude. And so they should really lean into that. I would say I would, I would go back

to the Louise Gonzalez's with the Diamondbacks. I'm not a big fan of the Diamondbacks threads these days. It's pretty grimy. To answer the question before the uniforms, their starting pitching has been really good so far. You saw Reed Detmer's, the rookie, go out and throw no hitter. Noah Cindergarde's been excellent. Patrick Sandiball, a young left-hander is quite solid. And then there's Otani, who's been better as a pitcher than a hitter this season. I mean, his stuff, you know, he's throwing 100-mile-an-hour fastballs that have cut to him. His slider gets swings and misses curveball, splitter. Like, he's got at least four plus two plus plus pitches, like above average to well above average to top of the line. And so,

like in game one, you can have Shohei Otani starting and be scared to death and then have him turn around half an inning later and hit a tank 450 feet. And no question. The idea that we can say this. It still doesn't register as immensely as it should. The sort of talent that we're dealing here with Shohei Otani is just, you know, the word unique gets thrown around so often. He is truly unique to this generation and the previous and the previous and the previous of baseball players. And what he's doing now, it's just impossible to replicate. Like, we're seeing a once in a lifetime player right now. And, I just hope that every person out there, whether you are a fan of baseball or not,

tunes in or goes to Angel Stadium at some point to say, I saw this guy who was unlike any other athlete in my lifetime. Yeah, it's like it's the, you know, do the likelihood of you being a big leader and playing at that level as a hitter and then do whatever math you need to do with the same thing for pitching. It's insane. Like, I don't know what the odds would be, but the odds of you be in Shohei Otani.

It's not happening. There's only one. Talk to me about Reed, Detmer's. shout out to Cowboy Reed back here. We got a no-hitter. I think the Angels won like 12-0-0-0. I was going to ask you this, you know, as a dummy. I feel like it's harder to throw a no-hitter

when your team scores a bunch of runs. Is that true or false, in your opinion? Yeah, you haven't thought about this. No, I haven't thought about it. Because the margin of error is so large that it's like, okay, if I give up a hit, we're still winning the game. Well, there's that. There's a psychological thing.

It's like in football, when you have to make a stop, you always make a stop. And then when you get into two-minute mode and people are catching up, you kind of relax. But more than that, I wonder about like being a pitcher and having to sit in the dugout for 30 minutes when your team score seven runs in an inning. Like, isn't it a kind of a deal with momentum

and kind of being in a rhythm? Do you have any opinion on that? Because I'm looking at that game and I'm like, hmm, I never wondered if it was harder to throw a no-hitter when you're kicking the shit out of the other team. Yeah. And it was interesting because he came back out one inning after his third baseman,

who is an elite right-handed hitter, Anthony Rendon, went up left-handed against Brett Phillips, an outfielder in a pitcher for the race, throwing 50-mile-per-hour meatballs. And Rendon Homer's left-handed. So take me through that because Rendon is first ever, and I'm like, why did he do it? Did he do it because he was just like fucking around?

He was like, yeah. Yes, that's it. Yeah, in the middle of a no-hitter. That's so disrespectful. Oh, it was, and it was so beautiful. That game was great. Trout homers twice. Rendon goes yard lefty and then Detmer's throws a no-hitter in the seventh start of his career. Coolest team in baseball right now is what I hear. Where are you on the Chris Woodward rant? I'll just, I'll just, I don't want to tip you on what side of the argument I am. Like, do you think that that was whiny to mention that it's a short porch and right field? Of course it was whiny and I love it. Yeah, but I love it. It's baseball.

I love it because anytime baseball has a situation where it's interesting, I'm all about that. And it's interesting to me that a manager from another team calls Yankee Stadium a little league ballpark. Like, that's great. Because you know what? I've been at Yankee Stadium the last couple days and I did see some Little League home runs. But that was not a Little League home run. They said 26 to 30 ballparks.

Yeah, that one was not a Little League home run. And there have been some little league home runs. It's just, you know, you have to come to terms with the fact that every ballpark has different dimensions. That's what makes it cool. Yeah. Football is boring. They're all, it's a gridiron. The George Carlin thing about the football, a football man and all that stuff.

Like a gridiron. Yeah, baseball. Like, yeah, there's a good George Carlin bit on that. Hey, Jeff. How old were you when you learned that second base was not 90 feet away from first base? Holy shit, dude. dude. 41 years old.

Yeah, right? Yeah, yeah. It's crazy. The whole thing about the bases and about the distance and about the larger bases that are going to be cut. Like, baseball's going through some changes right now.

And one of them is not my ignorance about the distance between, you know, second base and first base, all those things. But we're going to see larger bases. Have you guys followed, at all the pitch clock going on in the minor leagues right now. And this is one that we were talking about because it's not a rule yet.

It's a proposed rule change, right? Right. And what has been the kind of reception in the minors to like being on a shot clock? How long is that shot clock? The clock is 14 seconds with nobody on base and 18 seconds with runners on base. And let me tell you what happened immediately, instantaneously, baseball games are 25 minutes shorter. Wow. Like just because I, you know, we, we look at causative and correlate.

No, this is a purely causative thing. And it's 25 minutes. And the idea of Major League Baseball, which has an average game length of three hours, 10 minutes this year, shaving 25 minutes off. And on top of that, having a better pace. I had a friend who went to a minor league game for the first time a couple days ago. This is a younger guy, you know, in his mid-20s. And he was looking forward to it.

He played baseball in college. So, you know, I was curious to see what he thought. He, in the middle of the game, he's like, I love this. It's, it's pure baseball. It's the sort of stuff that we had growing up where, you know, there wasn't dead time in between pitches. There wasn't guys fucking around on the mound. Why did that start, dude?

Why did that start? It happened like right under my nose and I didn't realize it was going on. Yeah. Listen, it has nothing to do with commercials being longer like people think. No, this is a pure. and simple thing. Hitters took more time stepping out of the batters box and adjusting their gloves between every single pitch. And pitchers wanted, yeah, exactly. And pitchers wanted to use it, frankly, is timing. Like, it's hard to throw a baseball by a guy 60 feet, six inches away. And if you

can use timing mechanisms or if you can throw him off or if you can get in his head at all, or if you can get him uncomfortable, even the tiniest little thing there is going to help. And so pitchers found that to be an advantageous way of approaching things and lo and behold we are where we are now so do you think baseball is the most rapidly changing professional sport because i almost feel like it's a unquestionably unquestionably i mean what what changes in football well they always they tinker with football but like what they're doing with baseball right now is is fundamentally trying to change the game to make it more i don't know i don't like macken said you ask him your question well you're going to have to be more specific because i came armed with dozens of questions. We're talking about reinventing the sport and you wondered aloud if it would piss Jeff off to ask him this question.

Well, it's not that I don't care about baseball anymore. Frame it less. It's okay if you don't. Frame it how you want. It's, you know, it's the old adage. It's not something that we're worried about. It's apathy that we're worried about. I forget what the something is.

Yeah, I don't remember that adage. know, it's added. He was basically like, I think, I think the right word was something. It's not something we're worried about. It's empathy. But don't you think like, does it suck for you being a guy who obviously loves baseball? I mean, you've been open. That's right. You've been open about things. How do we fix it? Well, yeah, like that question is kind of like, well, like, does it need to be fixed in your head? Like, or are we just doing this for casuals? You know what I mean? Right. No, 100%. Yeah. I think doing something for casual. is not the wrong thing because I think that people who actively love baseball and spend 162

nights of their year following the game are going to continue in spite of the changes because they love the heart of the game. They love the core of the game. And the reality is the game does not exist if not for the casuals. The casuals are the ones who sustain it because they're coming out occasionally and filling up ballpark seats and watching and you're trying to turn them into the diehards into the hardcores. And the question is, what is the greatest and easiest path toward turning those casuals into something more? Getting them to love baseball like the rest of us. And frankly, I just look at this with my movie test. If you tell me that I'm going to the movie theater and a movie is three hours, it better be Oscar goddamn worthy for me to go

and watch it for three hours. Major League Baseball is asking people to spend, you know, 25 weeks of their year every single night watching an Oscar-worthy movie. So you better put an Oscar-worthy movie product out there in order to continue reining them in. And I understand that sports has different elements to it. You know, it hooks us. It transfixes us.

It brings us to this place that no movie can. can't because the baseball season is an ongoing story that's being written in real time. But to ask and demand three plus hours every night, I think there's a psychological barrier there with people where if you tell somebody it's going to be two and a half hours, it's a lot more palatable than something three hours. Don't go see Nightmare Alley with Bradley Cooper because that's three hours and it's not. No, I just wanted to give that you take that chance to. I love Bradley Cooper, dude.

He's the fucking man, but I'm not into that one. Are runs, do we have data on runs scored up with the pitch clock? Because that would be sick if we're in and out of there quicker and we're seeing more dingers. The pitchers have less time. Offense is flat, which is not a bad thing. That's okay. Because you introduce this new element, pitching is going to suffer on account of it. No.

What's the perfect score? What's the perfect score of a baseball game if you're watching a baseball game? Because in football, I have my idea of a perfect score. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I know where I want that game to be. What about for you? Can I have three perfect scores? Yes.

Because there are three different types of games I love. Sure, sure, sure. I adore a one-nothing game. I think a one-nothing game. To me, if I had to pick one of them, a one-nothing game is it. I want to see pitchers going out there and shoving. I want to see starters going seven, eight, go CG. I want to see an absolute pitching duel where it's not that the hitters are bad.

It's just that the pitchers are better. If it's not one nothing, I'd love to see 14 to 12, just a complete slug fest. Like if it's going to fall apart, fall apart the right way. Fall apart and entertain me and show me what these offensive players are capable of doing 14 to 12 with like nine home runs. I want to see like four triples in there too because triples are exciting. But an average everyday baseball game, I'll take a four to three game. Four to three is my favorite. Four to three is my favorite because you get a little hitting and a lot.

lot of pitching and things matter, but you're not waiting all day to see one thing happen. That's right. Like those outs in the ninth inning are huge. One thing I want to make sure to bring up, you're talking about the difference in the minor leagues because of the pitch clock. One thing they've also done is added a rule where you can only pick off over to first base two times. And if you do it a third time, if you don't get the guy, then that's a balk and he goes to

second. So what's the consequence of that? Guys are stealing a lot. A ton of bases now. And that's, you know, what, what does baseball need? Baseball needs action. Not just action in home runs, but action, putting the ball in play, you know, fewer strikeouts and action on the bases where you've got these incredible athletes who are better

than they've ever been in the sport. Let's see them run. Let's see the catcher throw because, you know, a lot of the catcher's job could be taken away if the automatic strike zone eventually comes into play, which is at this point a possibility. Yeah, okay, so talk to me about that. I do want to ask you about interviews in game, and I had a conversation with people about casuals and, you know, the hard-o fans that say that's bad for baseball.

But it's so good. It's so good. Thank you. Okay, good. It's so good. It's so fucking fun. Yeah, I have a, I'm sorry, but this is like Sunday night baseball is on our air. It's the one game a week that we're putting out there regularly.

And getting, getting to see guys, it's not just the conversations that are happening between Carl Ravich and Eduardo Perez and David Cohn and the players, Those are great. It's when something happens with the guy in the field. Oh my God. And he's talking as he's doing it. Give me more, dude. It's as real time as it gets.

And, you know, when a guy says it out loud, what he's thinking, what he's feeling in that moment, like, got to go get it. Yeah. Or this is a tough one. Or, you know, easy. Like, just getting that kind of access to me, baseball should be doing it all the time. It shouldn't just be a Sunday night baseball exclusive thing. guys should be miced up regularly.

Now, I understand if it's September, if it's the playoffs, you know, different, yeah, different situation. But during the season, if you have a guy miced up every game, I want to see a pitcher mic up. Yes. I want him to tell the announcers what he's about to throw, where he's looking to land a pitch. Like seeing that in real time would just be such a fascinating window into this sport that, that to me needs to allure people.

to bring it back and it would be such a teachable thing too like oh i learned stuff the other night i was watching lindore i learned stuff like i learned about like why they were doing what they were doing in the middle infield with alignments and you know like he was like you go deep i'm gonna get you know more shallow and it was just like i was like huh that's cool you know and i'm sitting here for 25 minutes between putting the kids down and dinner and i wouldn't be doing this otherwise that's uh good like i'm glad to hear that and i hope more people frankly say that because this is the sort of thing that baseball, and I don't just mean Major League Baseball. I mean Major League Baseball and the players need to be on the same page with. There's a duty

and a responsibility of the players of this generation to sell the game and keep it alive. And a lot of that they do passively. They do it just through playing, just through their talents and through what they show on a daily basis. But the active elements of it is where baseball struggles. And frankly, if a kid is sitting there watching a player on the field talking about what he's doing, how are you not going to fall in love with that player, with that game and with all of the things that come with it? Well, the funniest part was like he had struck out twice and he went to the dugout and they were still asking questions. And I think they were like, what happened? Like, how did he get you again? And like, and he started to answer the question.

Then motioned over it, I think the media guy or something and gave him this, finish the question. And then like 90 seconds later, they were like, and we're going to switch the mic now. So it's funny. Like, if you strike out, it's probably really fucking annoying to answer a question about it, two minutes later. But it was so cool to me.

And I think that's like, yeah, you're right. You could just play baseball, but you're going to leave something on the table. I mean, there's a lot of fans who are going to be brought in by access. And I think that's cool.

What about the hard oumps? Because we were just talking about, I don't think, listen, I'm anti-robot. I'm on the fence here about robot. One thing I don't want to lose, though, is hard-o umps because I think y'all's umpires are such fucking hardos that it's fun with the hard-o-ups.

I love it. I think we all, like everybody, it's fun to complain. It's fun to hate them. They're heels in wrestling. Like Angel Hernandez is a heel in wrestling. We need that. We need that guy to get to read Mad Bum's palm the other night. Like, we need that.

Like, Mad Bum needs that coming back to him because he's the biggest hardo on the diamond, dude. And so I was like, this is fucking karma. Can we protect the hard-o umps? then get the calls right at the same time. Can we do both? I feel like Angel Hernandez is Earl Hebner. Like we know Dave Hebner. Dave Hebner was like the good one.

Earl was like the evil one. And you never knew which one you were getting. And then they switch up in the middle of the match. You're like, oh shit, Earl Hebner came in. The baby face is fucked. Dude, Angel. Angel, I didn't realize that how, is he like the Scott Foster?

You know how people complain about Scott Foster, or the NBA official. Yeah. Angels like the go-to. Like, who's the most hated one? Yeah. Angel's the guy. But the thing about Angel, like on top of all this,

Angel sued Major League Baseball for racial discrimination. And in this suit said he didn't get promotions. And I think the suit was thrown out ultimately. But when Angel Hernandez sued Major League Baseball for not getting promotions, was like, dude, you don't get promotions because you kind of suck. And, and, and listen, there are, there are umpires out there. Dan Bolino was the one who read Madison Baumgartner's palm. And I think Dan Bolin, I think Dan Bolino is a good umpire who got caught up in that moment.

At a mallcott moment. I think, I think the backdrop in the context there is Madison Baumgartner was pissed at a ball strike call earlier in the inning from the guy behind the plate. Yeah. The guy behind the plate was a young umpire who had blown. to call the previous night. And I have no idea what Baumgartner said exactly, but I'm sure it was something to the effect of it. Yeah, if you if you don't know what fair and foul is, how can I expect you to know what balls and strikes are? And and Bolino, you know, Bolino's a leader in the umpires union. And I think he sees the abuse that umpires get and wants to stand up for his guy.

Now, I've never seen somebody stand up for somebody else by staring into a dude's eyes while massaging his hands, but, you know, they're different ways. Yeah, that was amazing. I want those stare downs. I want that moment. And, you know, here's another thing is, like, people are talking about baseball and stuff like that happens. Yeah.

Let me run this by you. Let me tell you what's happening at a level of the minor leagues. And in Lowe and the Florida State League this year, MLB is testing out, they call it ABS, automated balls and strikes. They're testing out the ABS system, but not full ABS. each side gets three challenges a game. I'm out. Whether.

Macon's out, he says. I continue. I'm still in. Okay. So they can be initiated by either the pitcher or the catcher on the defensive side or by the hitter on the offensive side. And it's a pretty simple thing. You go like this, you know, you cup your ears and the umpire turns around and within

five seconds from the press box. it's either a ball or a strike. Like this is not an extended replay challenge. This happens almost instantaneously. Dude, I really like this. You still out? I like this. How is a ball and strike called with this system?

So the ball and strikes are called through. No, it's pretty much that. It's a camera based system that has a strike zone that's preset for every player, you know, depending on what his stance looks like. They could have called it anything. They called it anti-laborians. But I'm like breaks, dude. There were so many acronyms to choose from, and you were like,

we're going to debut this new ABS. This game came out in the early 90s, man. And the fans are going to get into that. When they see this, they're going to be like, yeah. You know, and then they'll wait, and then there'll be a huge applause when. Boys, here's the interesting part of it. I want you to guess what percentage correct the pitchers and catchers have gotten on these challenges. And this data is a couple of weeks old, so it may have changed.

but, you know, once you get, I think it was a sample of 80. What percentage correct did the hitters get and the pitchers and catchers? 89 for the pitchers and catchers and the lower percentage for batters. I'm flipping. I'm saying 40% for pitchers and catchers and 62 for the hitters. Go ahead. It was 41% for pitchers and catchers. Wow.

And 44% for hitters. Wow. So risky. I would think the pitch. Yeah. You would think that they would know the umpire. That's exactly right. Actually,

even when they're doing a bad job or doing a decent job, you know, so that's pretty interesting. But robot ups maybe Florida A ball has to be, you know, you think about Florida man and chaos and all that stuff. Florida A ball has to be a fucking experience, huh? What are they doing at those games? Codiac. Math. Winter green, baby. I'm not doing winter green down there.

They're doing like red seal or something. Okay. So analog breaks and the whole thing. The Reds, they're tanking. How do you tank in the MLB? I don't know. I know how to tank in the NFL. I was part of a tanking experiment for many years.

Talk to me about MLB tanking. It's interesting because in years past, tanking was a lot more productive. Let's put it that way. The Astros tanked in the early to mid-2010s and ended up getting a bunch of hydrant. draft picks and nailed almost all the draft picks and won a championship in 2017 with those players on their roster. The Chicago Cubs did the same thing. What a championship in 2016 because they went and bottomed out and had high draft picks and did well. It's a little different this time around because the new collective bargaining agreement in Major League Baseball has a 16 draft

lottery. Right. And your chance, if you have the worst record in baseball, of getting the number one overall pick is only 16 and a half percent. So it's not like you're guaranteed to have a great pick if you are a shitty team. But if you want to talk about how you tank, you trade Jesse Winker, who is your best offensive player to the Seattle Mariners. You trade Sonny Gray, one of your best pitchers to the Minnesota Twins. You get rid of Tucker Barnhart, your catcher and move him to the Detroit Tigers. We have the Apology King now.

Nick Castellanos. So that was another one, right? They miss him probably, I'm sure, on some level, no. I miss him big time. I mean, you don't sign anyone of substance or consequence in the off season. It's not even so much that it's getting rid of those guys. It's that you're not making the moves to win. Right.

And when you're not trying to win, you know, that eliminates winning. so you're trying to lose. To me, it's a very simple, either you are trying to win or you're not. And if you're not, at least try and make it look not this ugly. They have done a better job. You know, they've won four of their last seven after losing 22 of their first way. Take it easy guys. We have a talking to the fucking clubhouse about that.

I mean, they were three and 22 at one point. Like it was bad. Listen, there's been some injuries there. Like they're missing some of the good players they have left. But come June and July, dudes are going to be moving. Like, is Luis Castillo going to be there? Is Tommy Fan going to be there? They're going to move everybody that they can.

So I'm going to tell you something here before we let you go, Jeff. And again, thank you so much for the time. And enlightening us. And baseball is fun as shit when Jeff comes on. And it's always fun. Yeah. Okay. But the A's attendance is 8400 a game this year.

No, it's not. Is it 80? What is it? is it? No, no, I mean, it's, it's 8400 sold. But if you're looking at the people there, how many are they get? 3,000 a night. So here's the deal. What we're going to do is, I'm not going to tell you which one, but we're going to, I'm going to buy a bunch of people tickets and just flood the stadium one of these games out there and make the city of Oakland feel really guilty. I don't know which one we're going to do. And maybe once I see what it's

going to cost us, we might not do it. But I know they're fucking dumping tickets for like $2 a head up there. Capacity is $63,000. Well, we just need to fill the upper decks. All we need to do is like, man, it's loud here tonight for the first time. What the fuck is going on? Where are the A's going next? I think Vegas.

Ugh, that sucks, dude. Another indoor baseball field? If it's not then, it's going to be someone. Yeah. I just, what, what bothers me is that Oakland is a great sports town. Yes, me too. Oakland is a great sports town. And listen, I,

grew up in Cleveland, so I know tortured sports fandom. I lived in Buffalo, so I know tortured sports fandom. Oakland's a different kind of tortured. You know, it's one thing to have teams that lose when it matters. It's another thing to have teams just taken away. And not one either. To have the Warriors move to San Francisco, to have the Raiders go to L.A. and then back and then to Vegas.

and now to potentially have the Oakland does not deserve its sporting fate. Right. I agree. I agree. My father's played there a long time in Oakland. For a period of time, he was the last Oakland Raider, and then they'd move back and move back. And like, to your point, it's like the tease of what they've done

with football going back and forth. And then the way that the, you know, baseball might be leaving and then turning on a Warriors game and seeing San Francisco written under the basket. You're like a little twist of the knife there, all the little tech bros. But I hate that shit, man. I hate it. And you know, it's not like I hate Vegas as a pro sports town because I went to a Legion stadium.

It was amazing. That stadium's amazing. Everybody should go see a game there. But it's just that like I don't want to see another dome team in baseball. And I certainly don't want it to happen at the cost of, you know, some of the most loyal few fans in baseball, the Oakland A's. Yeah. You know what? I think there's still a lot of Oakland A's fans out there.

Yeah. I just think they're tired of the shit. Yeah. And I don't, I don't blame them. Like, you can love baseball. you can love a uniform, but you don't have to love that organization. You don't have to love the people who are running it and the way in which they're running it. And that's what this is.

This is not Oakland fans not showing up to watch this team that they're supporting. This is Oakland fans saying you've been dicking with us for a decade plus about this stadium now. You traded almost everybody this offseason that we love, even though we're in a pretty good sized market. And the A's remember, they had their small market designation taken away in the previous collective bargaining agreement and lobbied Rob Manfred to put it back in this current one that was just signed. I just, yeah, and the fans don't want to be dicked. Like, they're not going to spend money knowing their teams getting ripped away from in the next couple years. Yeah, it sucks. I mean, it reminds me, it reminds me a lot of the way Cleveland Browns fans were. And

this was in my teenage years toward the end there when we knew that they were going, how can you possibly root for this team anymore when all they've done is hurt you? And that is the moving is the ultimate hurt. And they have been, the Oakland days have been teasing the possibility of this move for years and years and years now. And it looks like it may eventually be coming closer to a reality unless Oakland can figure out this stadium situation. And frankly,

if the city of Oakland does, the hundreds of millions, billions of dollars that are going to be spent on this taxpayer dollars. I mean, there is no greater racket in the American economy than a stadium. That is probably funded. Look at the Buffalo situation and, you know, Carolina and David Tepper. But the A's fans can catch Sean Murphy, Mike Dump in Vegas in a couple of years. Because hopefully keep doing that. Is saying Guardian second nature for you, or do you sometimes slip up and say the racist one?

I have not said it on air yet, but it's just a matter of time. Yeah. All right. Jeff Passing, I'm all, we're all caught up. Yeah. Go Jays. Hey, dude. Big Blue Jays fan right here.

Yeah, and I fucking love the Phillies and the Baltimore. How are the Baltimore, how are those Baltimore Orioles doing? They're upstart. Yeah, they really suck. Nothing's changed. I'll check back next year. Jeff, thank you for your time, brother. Gentlemen, it's always a pleasure.

See you, dude. If you're in Arizona, Colorado, Indiana, New Jersey, New York, Michigan, Tennessee, or Virginia, and you haven't tried the WinBet app yet, I got great news for you. New users can take advantage of WinBet's Bet 50 Win 200. That's right. WinBet is basically giving you free money. Don't pass it up. Download the WinBet app today.

Terms and conditions apply. It must be 21 or older and present in a state where WinBet is available. gambling problem in Arizona call 1,800 next step in Colorado, Indiana, New Jersey, and Virginia call 1-800 gambler and in Michigan, 1-800-2-7-1-17. Tennessee, y'all too. 1-8009-9-9-7-89. I just called the A's.

Yeah? Went to voicemail, dude. I wanted to see about selling out their stadium. I still don't quite get the bit. Like it would be one of the biggest sports stories. Everybody would be like, why the fuck are there so many people at the A's game? Yeah.

They don't do this. What's going on tonight? And then they find out Greenlight Pod. We get rich. Right. All right. Good investment. No, it checks out.

Like free advertisement. We could get T-shirts made for all the youths that we send up there. I'm not saying I'm going to watch any more baseball games now. But I like baseball more because of Jeff Pass. Yes. Baseball is in a better place because Jeff Passon isn't dead yet from American spirits. That's exactly right. Hey, listen up.

I have a pet peeve. This is the payoff. You were like, I got to sit through a baseball interview. Well, the baseball interview was hot shit, and now you get a, now you get a cherry on top with this here,

pet peeve. You people and your voicemail greetings, okay? So the phone rings, you don't pick up, and then it's your voice saying, hey. Now,

unfortunately, my guy, you're guilty of this, but so are many. So are many. Really? What is mine style? You people say, hey, you've reached so and so.

Well, fuck, no, I haven't, or else I'd be talking to you right now. I got, got, got, got, got, got. You say, hey, you've reached Chris. Yeah. And then you, you failed to reach Chris. Correct. You want me to do it now? Yes.

Answer machine. Now, so if you say, hey, it's Chris, leave a message. Hold on. I got you. I'm going to change it right now. Or, hey, you've reached Chris's voicemail. Now, that'd be accurate. But hey, you've reached Chris is not accurate.

Dude, my mom has the worst voicemail of all time. What is it? I don't remember, but I'm afraid to listen to it. It's so bad. All right, here, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. Okay, yeah. You've failed to reach Chris.

I will reach you at my earliest convenience. Leave a message. That's dynamite. Dynamite, dude. Save. Now, I will miss your previous voicemail, which said, I'm not going to listen to this, which I really appreciated. Oh, I did. Fuck.

I just deleted that? Yeah. You can redo it right now. again. Hey, you failed to reach Chris. I don't check this often. So send me a text message. I did say that for a long time. Yeah. Yeah. And I really respected that. But hey, hey, guys and gals who are saying, hey, you've reached me. No, we haven't. Hold on. I'm going to call my mom and see if we can have her just. You're the golden child, though. She's going to pick up. Yeah. No, I'm not the golden. Kyle's the golden child.

If you ask howie, Kyle's the golden child, your mom is boy you caught me all right i'm gonna need i'm gonna need you to let me call through to the voicemail can you do that because i'm trying to show it to macken my voicemail i changed it no yep i did what did you what did it used to say can you tell us what it used to say i knew how to do this uh used to say um hi blah blah um i was told that i sounded really mean on my voicemail so i'm leaving a very nice voicemail because i really am a nice person i could not believe you went through with that that was all i wanted to show making he's he's here there's making why is making calling though he's trying to get the voice he's trying to get the voice now i changed it yesterday oh no we're a day late are you kidding me yeah i i did i changed it yesterday one of the worst voice

of all time. Dad thought it was one of those, hello. Yeah, it was. Every time I called you, I'd be like, Mom. Oh, no. See, I didn't do that. I'm perfect. Yeah, this is a terrible voice mail.

But no, could I? Let me tell you something funny. You called me. I'm literally standing out in front of your house, so I thought you caught me on your camera. No, no, no. And because I dropped off the fart machine for the boys. Grown up.

You're grown up. And then Meg told me I could boost some flowers. Yeah. I went and cut some peonies. Anyway, and then the phone rang is I'm walking by the front of your house. I'm like, damn it, I'm on his camera. Yeah, I mean, making cuts through my yard, so no big deal. But yeah, it was good to talk to you, and I'm glad we got the voicemail.

We got to the bottom of the voicemail thing. Yeah, yeah. All good. Are you good? Yeah, we're good. I'll call you later. Love you. I love you.

Bye. Bye. Did she, was I in the love you or no, just the bye. I think it was love y'all. Hey, her new voicemail says, this is Diane. You've reached my voicemail. So, intelligent person. Yeah, you've reached my voicemail.

That's good. Okay, I see, I see it. Okay. Pet peeve has been disseminated. Let's talk about the NFL now. As a pescatarian podcast, I'm sure we agree with Sam Howell, but he announced that he's never had steak. He only has chicken.

He brings chicken tenders to team meals when there isn't, when there isn't chicken being served. Essentially, Sam Howe is bringing chicken tenders in his pockets to, like, events that don't have chicken tenders. This guy, this guy looks exactly like the guy that's never had anything but chicken. Does he not? If there's any quarterback that has had nothing but chicken, it's Sam Hal.

Well, chicken tenders, yeah. Yeah, maybe you should mix in a grilled chicken every now and again. Just a grilled chicken would be nice, like, cut down in the sodium a little bit. And I actually, like, I wish I was Sam Howe's agent. Whoever Sam Howell's agent is needs to get fucking fired because I haven't seen him on Chick-fil-A commercial yet. Like, he needs to be on Chick-fil-A commercial stat, dude. He lives in D.C. You should drive down here to the chicken strip. He could, we have a chicken strip here. It's famous. Stanford Steve knows all about it.

Raising Cains, Chick-fil-A, fucking KFC. Pop-Eyes. It's all right there for you, dude. We could host you, Sam Howell. It would be a lot nicer than when we hosted you in football. they probably beat us yeah we beat them every year from 81 to 2000 million but anyways uh I was thinking chick-fil-a for sure and then the funniest visual in my head is Carson Wentz taking him to st. Elmo's one of the most famous steakhouses as like for the rookie dinner and like they get a private

back room and they're like what do you want in the background room and Carson Wentz is like I want a fucking cow we're going to slaughter this cow right here and eat it and the Sam Hal is just sitting there totally shell-shocked. There's no chance he wins the job because he had to go to St. Elmo's and watch people just eat all that steak. Do you think he's trying to crash Doug Eddardt, who said he never had a sandwich? Well, I'm much more on Doug Eddard's team. Fuck sandwiches for the most part, dude. Really? No, just two pieces of bread to meet in between, not even any meat, just lettuce, tomato. The only sandwich I eat is a peanut butter sandwich. Bloody anaconda. No, not even any jelly.

peanut butter maybe a little peanut butter and honey I'm way more on team Dougetter than team as a pescatarian respectfully Sam Howell is is a moron has he ever had a Branzino

Sam could get a rack of lamb A pork chop or a roasted chicken breast Do you think GMs were talking about this Is like a red flag Like is this a conversation they're having? They used to get mad at guys when they If they said they like cats They say are you a dog

or a cat. Like there was a right answer in there that they were going to, they're not asking for no reason. So the fact that he only eats chicken is not insignificant. I think it's a red flag. It's really weird. It's a total red flag. And everybody knows.

And Harbaugh calls it a nervous bird. Yes. You have a fight or flight. Did Harbaugh say this or did I just make this up? There's a fighter flight response in your body, right? Right. And the more chicken you eat, the more flight. Right.

So I'm a little bit worried about fourth quarter what happens. fucking Sam Howell, he just starts attempting to fly out of the stadium. Yeah. Eat like a, eat a bird that can actually get off the ground. Eat more penguin. Oh. No.

No, also flightless. He's probably a big Timberwolves fan. Definitely a big Timberwolves fan. Loves that owner. Definitely anti the protests there. The chicken protests start going around the NFL and he's just skirting questions. He's like, no comment.

Gloving themselves to goalposts. Yeah, exactly. I took two knees. That's what Ray Lewis said. That's what Sam Hal would be on two knees praying for the Timberwolves owner. I took two knees. That's what Sam Hal would say, dude. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, sorry, excuse me.

At St. Elmo, that's served with either a Navy Bean soup or tomato juice. That Navy bean soup at St. Elmo is awesome. It's got to be good. It's awesome. It's awesome. To serve a Navy bean soup. It is so good. At a place like St. Elmo's, which I've never eaten at, but Lord, every NFL media member tells you all about it.

We played it at Indiana a few times, which nobody can quite wrap their head around. But we played at Indiana in like 2011. And I've remembered that Navy bean soup for 11 years now. How far is Bloomington from Indianapolis? We stayed in Indianapolis. It was like, you know UVA football in the past. We often stay an hour away from the football stadiums here, buddy. So we get nice and tight before the football games.

to be in a before we lose the football games you want to shorten your hip flexors shout out to dave damashek who could not believe that I actually used to think about this as an athlete like how long you're sitting at a bus it shortens your hip flexors so don't you don't want to fucking stay in all you peloton addicts be careful about those hip flexors yes you're I don't even ride the bike anymore you stretch those things out I don't even ride the bike anymore jim mersey has had an eventful couple days on twitter he put up a semi unintelligible video no it's very intelligible Twitter you just have to show it to kair

Irving he'll translate it he he also was just revealed as the purchaser this is where he's got me of a baseball signed by Ukrainian president uh sold for 50,000 dollars so he just bought a baseball signed by the ukraine guy is single-handedly beating russia dude jim mersey is single-handedly dominating russia dude he's public enemy number one he recently bought the kirk cobain guitar. See, here's the thing about Jim Ursay. Everybody looks at him through the lens of an NFL owner and they're like, why has he got like a fucking, um, a chakra specialist walking around him on his giant jumbo private jumbo jet playing like a monk music? Uh, why is that owner behaving that way? No, Jim Mersey is a fucking hippie, dude. Jim Ursay is a hippie that got really rich and I'm all the

way down with it. But what Jim Mersey should know is there's like a, Mendoza line for people taking that shit seriously. Like if Lenny Kravitz does what Jim Mersey did, everybody's like, oh, cool, right? Right. It likes fucking loud noises, you know? Guy says some Eastern medicine like shit sometimes. That's Zen.

Yeah, that's, oh, that's Zen. But if you're Jim Ursa, if you're an NFL owner, people don't go for that. I totally love Jim Ursa going on a spiritual journey. And I love his jet even more, dude. shit a lot of room to operate in that thing wow why sit there there's other places to sit yeah do you decide upon that seat like that was like a floating seat in the middle of the jet definitely a hippie has guitars from jerry garcia doesn't you have a garcia guitar has paid

2.2 million for a drum set belonging to wringo star grateful grateful dad jerry garcia ringo star the beetles good job and then and paid the all-time record almost four million dollars for Pink Floyd guitarist David Gilmore's guitar and he tweets a lot dude he actually tweet I'm gonna follow Jim Ursay I like Jim Ursay oh he's got a there's a hockey game going on in the background of that of that plane yeah so here here here's what I'm looking at here it's like a big screen sunglasses on the plane right yep and the woman's just walking around with a vase playing like vibration music yeah his ear it's coats buttoned awaken open your eyes and don't live your life sleepwalking. I got to say the first thing I'm thinking when I hear him say that on

that plane, I'm like, if I'm sitting at home in my cubicle and I'm seeing that video, I'm kind of like, bro, I have no choice but the sleepwalk. Look at your plane, dude. It's easy to say that on your plane. But I really fuck with Jim Mercer. He's, he's a hippie. He's just, he's a badass. He actually auctioned off Kurt Cobain's guitar to raise money for mental health awareness. I like Jim Arseye. Kurt Cobain, Guns and Roses. Nah, dog. Okay. All right.

Three for five. That's for serious? Yeah. Kurt Cobain. Not for serious. No. Like it was a guess? No.

I'll give you a second guess. The guy in Guns and Roses is fucking, I'll give you a hint. Axel Rose. Name is in the band. Okay. Kurt Cobain. By the way, we have this. Axel Rose, I said the other day I was ranking rains.

Like which month has the best rainy days? May is up there. I was so green it's beautiful I'm being an adult here make did you know the the name axel rose is spelled in a way so that it's like an anagram for oral sex yes I did hear about that and dr. fax also positive today that faded a f is a palindrome yeah that's right allendrome oh nice so we got palindromes we got anagrams but bottom line is I ranked november rain like 21 out of 12 months yeah November rain sucks ass like not the song but rain in november is some of the worst rain that exists you'd rather be snow and people took that wrong axel rose is literally saying that november rain sucks you all don't

it's like listening to born in the u.sss springsteen is a jar head dude no dude axel rose is saying november rain sucks dude got it ronald regan actually had born in the u.say played at one of his inauguration so did donald trump's dumb ass what else he um i think he played fortunate son at a fucking rally, dude. These people don't listen to music. They don't know anything about these fucking. Am I going to tell me where Kurt Cobain I'll give you a choice? Nirvana, bro. Sorry.

No, it's fine. Nirvana. I don't think I would have gotten. It's going to blow your mind. Yeah. Nirvana. I get it. I get it. You get it? Yeah. There's a quarterback down in Florida. He just made big news by signing a large deal to Fox. You had me in the first half, dude. Reed, you have me in the first half there. I thought we're going to

talk about the thing that I'm not talking about. I'm taking the I rode on that viral video to a throwing the ball to Cheetah talking about Brady. That's right. Talking about Brady 10 years, 375 million to Fox post his retirement. I want to say this. First off, and it's been a couple days since this news broke. And I thought there was a lot of hysteria. First off, Jim Rome is rich. I know you fuckers are shocked. This is the most millennial thing of all time is like staring at a headline and being like, this can't be true because it's not happening here on Twitter. Jim Rome's fans aren't on Twitter

dude he has a terrestrial army of Orange County bald guys that are riding to work listen to fucking Jim Rome since 1993 okay I you know until we moved to Virginia that's where I lived so Jim Rome like when my dad played was you know just an absolute force

and those people didn't all die yet so the thing about it is is like Jim Rome is rich as fuck and just because people aren't tweeting about Jim Rome doesn't mean he's not rich as fuck So Jim Rome makes a boatload of money. That's what we realized this week. We also realized that Tom Brady will make a lot of money.

He's going to make 37 million a year over 10 years. Now, I want people to realize something first. Fox has disputed those numbers in some capacity. Now, I don't know if it's been confirmed by now, but there were some disputes as to whether or not those numbers were legit. I also want to say this, that market's going to reset a little bit by the time Brady retires. Brady could retire in three years. Like in three years, how much you think Romo is going to make?

How much you think Strayhan's going to make? How much you think, you know, Stephen A was on that list. Like Stephen A not getting paid a lot. That's ESPN's fault. Okay. Like, and people are like, oh, Stephen A doesn't get paid enough. That's not fair. Tom Brady, Romo, you know, stray hand, whoever you want to throw in there.

Like these are all different networks with different salary caps, dude, and different, you know, aims. And I also want to say this is very important is that, like I said, three years from now, that market could be very different. and maybe a bunch. Now, I know that's he still probably be the highest paid guy. Could reset the other way. Could reset the other way. And then they could be sitting there with a fucking, with a terrible contract for Tom Brady. Right. But another thing they get to do is they get to cut the line.

So Fox gets the security of saying, hey, Tom Brady is ours when he retires. And you beat the rush, you beat the uncertainty. And then you know because, and I don't know what came first to chicken of the egg. I'm kind of guessing like it was simultaneous and I don't have any insight me and my dad have not talked about this partially because I don't want to know because then I'm like you know my source is my dad and I don't know that anybody knows there what came first if it was Troy and Joe going to my football or if it was Brady saying like hey while he was taking his month off I'd like to do this but it makes a lot of sense for them to commit and commit big that's the cost of having that number one when he retires but the funny

thing is until then like a guy like who's going to be there number one one next year. Greg Olson. Greg Olson. He's going to have an opportunity to take cuts at this in the number one spot. And like, I think it's going to be good for our guy Greg Olson too. So I like it for him, but how would you feel if you know you're about to be replaced? Well, it's Tom Brady. It's the Brady rule. And I'm saying this to any media member, any player, any former player in the media, like, I know we think we matter. I know you think you matter. I know like, you know, we all work very hard. I know some people have been working for two, three decades at this thing, but this is Tom Brady. He's been raking in dough for the NFL for two decades. And now he gets to see some of it on the

other side. And the thing about the media is it's not a meritocracy. It's not. If it were a meritocracy, we'd be making a lot more fucking money, wouldn't we? A lot more people will be listening to this show. I'm just being real. Like, it's not a meritocracy. I know there are shows that we are better than that make, that have more viewers, more listeners, like the whole thing. but some people are more popular and some people make they move the needle more and I had somebody tweet me and be like oh Tom Brady doesn't how many people are going to

watch the game 100 because of Tom Brady absolute bullshit dude Tom Brady moves the needle like Romo is is the biggest case for Tom Brady Romo is good at what he does but Tom Brady might be better dude Tom Brady now he doesn't have the pizzazz that Romo has but he's going to be really fucking good at his job

He's also got more mystery. Like for 20 years in New England, we had no idea who this cat was. Exactly. It's the slow bleeding of the branding that really, like, drives at home for me. It's like Tom Brady has done a masterful job of not showing you who he is until the very last second when it's time to then cash in on all that silence and that greatness. And he made the NFL a lot of money. So of all people that I'm going to complain about getting a big deal in the media, I'm sorry. I'm very empathetic.

And I get that like some people have worked a long time. and Tom Brady's not going to be necessarily as good as them, but he's Tom fucking Brady. You know, there are people who are really good at their jobs who you've never heard of because somebody else got to show at ESPN or CBS or at Barstool or at the ringer

who's just there to move the needle. It's not necessarily a meritocracy. And Tom Brady might do both. He might be really fucking good at it. And he might also move the needle. I like Fox's strategy, though, of like spending big on one guy and then developing talent.

It's like Kevin Burckhardt's been at Fox for a long time. Right. And people love Kevin Burckhard. And he's great. And if you look like collectively how much ESPN's paying like Buck and Akeman, it's kind of probably roughly comparable to what Fox is paying their team. Yeah. And I haven't dug into those Monday Night football numbers.

But like I think those guys are going to do really well where they're going. And I think Kevin and Tom, whenever they get together, are going to be great. And Greg's going to get some cuts at the number one spot. But I think Greg, I don't want to put words in his mouth, but like we all get it like tom brady is tom brady any room you're in tom brady walks in he's the fucking man in that room and that's life and some people just got to accept that now i know the ugly part of that is maybe somebody gets laid off because of tom brady and that sucks like maybe my dad gets laid off because of tom brady i'm you know like i don't know i hadn't thought about

that until now but definitely some of the little people quote unquote who are really the big people and that sucks, like production people and that sort of thing could get laid off because of this. But this is the way it is, man. Another thing that's interesting is Peyton Manning. Peyton Manning is a guy that I've been clamoring to see get one of these jobs. Now the musical chairs game has like kind of stopped.

There's no more jobs. And I don't know if he, like, does he have the money to purchase the Broncos? So Brady for 20 years like torturing Peyton and then coming on his Manning cast to use the Manning cast to like get his name hot like we saw brady even though he wasn't that great on it we saw brady using Peyton's you know living room to get ready to make 37 milly and cuck paid manning again dude

but tom's going to be an employee and and Peyton owns his his operation with omaha hall productions and that's and that's why i fuck with Peyton yeah because i think Peyton is Peyton's a guy like Tom is win at all costs, right? And so is Peyton, obviously. But Tom's going to carry this. He wants the biggest deal. He wants the best job. He wants to dominate, right?

And Peyton's kind of like, what do I want to do to make myself happy? And I don't want to put words in his mouth or thoughts in his head. But that's how Peyton's moved, ownership, comfort. He's doing that show from his studio, right? His living room. He's making a fuck ton of money from his living room. That's the thing. You know?

Tom wanted to spend more time with the family. Is he going to be popping in on game days, popping out post games? I don't know. Is he going to be having the in-person meetings on Saturdays? I think he's going to, he's going to obviously have to travel, and he's going to have to do the production meeting stuff. In some ways, Tom Brady's going to be, like, he's going to be starting over. Like, this is his, you know.

Or is Tom calling these shots? Is it like, I'm good on a Zoom? No, he's got to go to production meeting. He's going to go to production meeting. The funny thing about production meetings, I just thought, I thought about this this week, and some people in New England picked this up. I don't know how anybody didn't think about this. But Tom Brady and Bill Belichick in a fucking production meeting on Saturday is gold, dude.

And we'll never know what was said. We'll never know what was said. We don't know if that's going to happen two years from now, three years from now. We don't know if it's not going to happen because maybe Bill retires before Tom moves into the booth. Maybe Bill retires and moves into the media as crazy as that would sound. What if you had Tom Brady and Bill Belichick calling a game one day? A boy can dream You know

I'm just dreaming about the production meeting Talk to me about Mac Jones It's 2012 Bill's like yeah I remember him Nah they drafted that kid to get rid of Jared Stidham That's why Jared Stidham Just got traded somewhere They recouped the draft picks

Zappi I've got a funny feeling that there's a clause In that contract that says Yeah but if I want to do something else Then nah For sure this guy is all about leverage Think about the leverage he has one year left on his deal with Tampa Bay.

He has leverage in that way. He has leverage on the other stuff. And people are always going to be mad. Like Tom, somebody said, you know, we asked a couple times, like, I was like, send me all the blue checks that were so fucking mad, the most sour about Tom Brady, right? And somebody was like, bro, just Google search Brady and privilege.

I was like, yeah, I'm all about the privilege conversation in pretty much any corner of America. But this is Tom Brady privilege. This is fucking being the goat privilege. privilege, dude. This guy owns football. He's owned football the last 20 years. He's going to come out and he's getting a big slice of the pie. And it's not a meritocracy. If you want a meritocracy, you've got to get into something else because the media is not a meritocracy. You mentioned a couple times that you will take the high road in this particular Tuas situation. Can I give you an opportunity

to come down to the low road? Is that like Tua's pass? It was like high road. That's right. It was high road for a while. Tua took the high road with that. So here's the thing. about the Tua pass. There was a safety like five yards behind Tyreek, yeah. He saved that play. It was an intentional underthrow. That's a good spin, dude. That's a good spin. Unlike Tua's spiral.

And I've been seeing, you know, a lot of the Dolphins fans have been posting pictures, videos of Patrick Mahomes, quote unquote, underthrowing Tyreek Hill, like on the field, rolling right, chased by 900 pounds of elite athletes. Without a bucket hat on? Without a bucket hat on. Like just

a dart, you know, behind Tyreek, because that's where the defender was obviously sprinting full speed. Maybe the underthrow is the way to go with Tyreek because of his speed. Honestly, all jokes aside, the fucking throw was terrible. And I don't know why they posted that because they know people like me have been saying the quiet part out loud. And that's why Dolphins fans hate people like me. Because we're saying very calmly that I don't know that Tua has arm strength. And you guys told me it doesn't matter because all that offense is about, all Cheetah is about is underneath stuff. So why are you fucking defending your quarterback so vehemently if you know it's not true?

Just peek your head into Dolphins Twitter right now. They are going fucking nuts over this video. They're having emergency podcasts and their little podcasts. They're fucking, they're having Twitter spaces. The sky is falling. There's conspiracies. Here's what I want to know, how long the throw was. I have been Google searching and like turning that practice facility upside down online,

trying to figure out where he caught that ball. I know off the top of my head, he threw it out the back of the end zone. They changed their facility in 2021, so don't look at the old one. The new center, which I think is like Miami or Florida Baptist or Miami Baptist Center or whatever. He's throwing it out the back of the end zone. there's I think five or six tunnels in the bleachers to the right of the field, right? There's five or six corridors, and there's five or six little sets of bleachers. I think it lands short of the third set of bleachers.

So I'm trying to figure out where that lines up with the yard markers to tell me how far that throw was. My estimate, 38 yards, dude. 43 yards. No, I'm not being funny here. As your friend, like relax a little bit. Why? Like you're going Zapruder film on Miami Baptist football facility.

So we can do this. I mean, this is like two and on type shit, but the reverse. No, it's not. We're just doing a podcast, dude. Okay. We're doing a podcast. The throws 38 yards. It's the biggest topic on the week.

Excuse me for trying to cut the line and get the analytics out of this thing. Yeah, no, no, no. It's impressive. Sports Illustrate is calling it. Underthrowgate. Underthrowgate. People are talking about it on Sports Illustrate. You want me to relax?

God, let you fucking drive the bus. We just, what are we talking about? Marvelous Ms. Maisel here. To a throw is the lead. And it's one of the biggest bits we have is to a tagabai low and not being able to throw the deep ball. And lo and behold, his own social media people slow the fucking ball down in the air

to show us that it's not a spiral, right? And then put a rocket emoji. A rocket emoji. A rocket emoji, bro. Tua needs to stuff that social media guy in a fucking locker. Are you cutting that guy if he works for you? Oh, yeah. I don't care how much engagement that got my site.

Like, I'm definitely... A lot. Yeah, like, hey, on the way out, the guy's like, but look at these fucking impressions, dude. Look at the quote. tweets. I mean, Tua probably, what did he do to that guy? Did he cut him in line, pasta day at that facility? Because you know the players and the social media people and everybody in the building oftentimes,

like what do you think Tua did? Did he take his parking spot? Like, what did Tua do to that social media person to throw gasoline on this fire? It is, it's one of the craziest sports stories of 2022 already. That tweet. Yes, dude. And the evidence is the proof of the was in the pudding. Look at the fucking retweets on this thing. Well, it was the second Tirae to Tyreek tweet that we've had this year. There was the other one a couple weeks ago. Where you threw the three yard out. Three yard out.

And everybody was like, three yard out. We know you have that in the arsenal. And they were like, well, watch this. We're going to flame the fuck out of our quarterback. Maybe Teddy Bridgewater's running the account. Teddy could be running the account. Fitsy could be running the account. The wind was 14.

miles an hour that day. I just want to say I went back and looked at the wind. You want to call me crazy. I went back to Cape Fortua to tell you guys that there were Gus up to 16 miles an hour. That's moderate. In one direction? Was it swirling? It could have been in the direction of that past, dude. And so I'm not even here to bury Tua. I'm just here to laugh at you motherfuckers, dude. All you dolphins fans, now some of you guys are really cool and funny, but some of you guys are absolutely out of your fucking gourds. And, you know, like, posting pictures of Patrick Mahomes throwing touchdowns

and Tyree Kill is not going to help your case, dude. It's just not. So just stop, dude. Stop. I'll stop if you stop. I wasn't going to talk about Tua until October, dude. Until they were three and four, and we're talking about Teddy Bridgewater. But now I got to talk about Tua. You did this.

I got him in the middle of the end zone if you want to take off a couple of yards. I'm still going with 43, 43 yards. Okay. How many yards would it take for you to say, oh, okay. It's not about the distance which you can throw the ball, man. Like, it's about the context within which you throw that football, how far you throw it and how accurately you throw it. So, bro, all right.

There's no practice throw that's going to make me go, yep, we're good. And there's not really one game, like one game throw ain't going to do it. I don't want to sound all you and shit. Yeah. But have they like intentionally brushed airbrush? rush that yard line out of that pick because there's a zero right there. Bro, that's what I'm saying. They don't want you to know where it is.

I'm telling you, I'm going to be honest here. I'm not being a conspiracy theorist. So, and maybe there's something to glean there are the old, the old numbers. But with practice fields in the NFL, it's very interesting. You will flip them. You will rotate them the way you would rotate a picture in like a photo editing app. You know, just rotate at one. 90 degrees.

90 degrees. You got it. A lot of times you do that because the field will get beat up in, in one place. and you rotate those fields. So I don't know, that was probably an old yard marker from when he would have been throwing across those fields. But now he's throwing into the wind and towards the 38-yard line

out of the middle of the end zone. So I just want to know, I have texts out to multiple people asking them that played for the dolphins. Like, what yard line is that, dude? Tell me. Tell me about that facility, dude. Tell me, I want to,

I might have to make a pilgrimage to that spot, dude. An E-60, outside the lines. Me and Tua meet at that spot to talk about putting our differences aside of which there are none, dude. I love the guy. Here's the problem, Tua.

If I meet him at that yard line, I'd be like, bro, I love you, man. You're like fucking everything that's right about sports. I just want to say this about Tua. He's everything that's right about sports from where I sit. I don't think he's a great deep ball throw.

He'd probably shrug and go, yeah, I know. And then I'd be like, your fucking fans are crazy, dude. They're crazy. They're insane. He'd probably go, yeah, I know. And then we'd dapp up and it'll be over. You fucking morons, dude. That means you picked that throw, dude.

You picked that throw. You know they throw multiple passes in practice. Like, they throw multiple nine routes in underwear. That was the best one. That was the only one that was completed. Bro. The thing about the ball in the air is that it doesn't go very far. You can tell that.

Dog, that's what I'm saying. It gets to its apex right quick. They're trolling. They're the best trolls. I think it's a troll thing. It's a smokescreen. He's really throwing it V-Far. Yeah, dude.

Look at that. And people did the punt. I'm not here to do that. That could have been a punt return joke. I'm not trying to get gratuitous. I'm just trying. And I know he's getting his torque back. The dolphins Twitter, they're like, you should know.

His torque's not fully back yet. Call me when it is, man. ankle flexion's like the last thing to come back I stopped dealing with those fucking just they're crazy they're crazy bro they're crazy they're insane America's first real metaverse

is the dolphin is dolphins's Twitter it's another reality you probably there's a CVS in there you can get fake deodorant you fake icy hot to rub onto his shoulder after that throw fucking idiots down there dude I'm thinking about Miami

I was supposed to take this this vacation down to Miami. I'm worried I'm going to get jumped down there. But like 18 guys in a Reddit group. A whole Twitter space coming up to you. Twitter space is going to be like waiting at the terminal to try to beat me up, dude. This is so funny these people, dude.

I'm done with this too, I think. I'm done until October. I'll be gone until November, dude. Why clef? All right. We're going to find you if you talk about Tua before the regular season. No, because things could come up. Well, then you'll have to pay the $10.

Oh, I'll fucking pay the $10. It's like me with a parking ticket outside. Great, cool. Oh, fucking great story. I have a parking ticket. Yeah, I think I have to hit me for the late fee too. Fuck. Do you guys want to get into our best athletic apparel draft?

Let's do this draft. I'm going to kick your ass in this draft making. I don't disagree. I don't disagree, and I'll tell you why. Don't sink the draft here. I'm not going to sink the draft here. Hey, I win more drafts and I lose, right? I don't know about that.

My big board's not great. Okay. Not great. He's lowering expectations right now. Will you explain the draft? Yeah, so it's going to be Chris making and read in a snake-style draft. It's best athletic apparel in sports history. So like an example that I'm sure you guys have talked already thought of.

So it's not like on your board. Like Joel and beats Matt. I'm not drafting Joel. Yeah. I'm not doing any Bobby Portis stuff either, although you might i think maybe you were going to try to do bobby porters first to like i'm not no i'm not playing i am inspired by joel and beads mask but can be any sport we're going to do five rounds chris you're up first he said who do you think i am what's a peter leber line you who do you think

who do you think you are i am who do you think you are i am that's you peter yeah the accessories can be anything now and they could be a coach's accessory too so now Actually with the first pick in the 2022 accessories draft, I'm going with Howie Long's Cowboy Collar. He was on your board, wasn't he? He was. Yeah, Howie Long's Cowboy Colley. I wouldn't going to let you pick my dad's, my dad's accessory, dude.

He had that little white cowboy collar. It didn't do shit, dude. I know because I wore a damn cowboy collar in high school. Not because of him. I wore it because of the people that he inspired, man. Like, there were a whole generation of guys that were in McDavid shit. Romanowski. Yeah, didn't Alvin Mack in the program have a cowboy collar?

Oh yeah. That was my dad, dude. Yeah, that was my dad. I started sweatshirt cutoffs. Oh. Yeah, he started a cowboy collar. You asked even Jackson, he'll tell you I started a sweatshirt cutoff. But yeah, this thing didn't do anything for your fucking neck.

I know because I just had to give my chiropractors information. So that little white neck roll, but he's, you know, he's obviously a trailblazer and a legend, so I'll go Howie Long, pick one. All right, reads up next. Pick number two, I'm going I'm going Len Dawson's cigarette. That's amazing. The famous picture, Len Dawson,

at halftime of the Super Bowl, smoking the cigarette. I don't even know who Lynn Dawson is, so let's ease up on the famous. Oh, fuck, he's the guy with the cigarette. Yes. He's sitting on his helmet. Yeah, he's sitting on his helmet. Len Dawson.

That's perfect. Yeah, I thought he was some pitcher. Yeah, I thought he was on pitcher, too. Right? Len Dawson, is that a Shasta on the ground? Like a fucking, I think that's a tab.

That's a heater, bro. I mean, no, on the ground. I know it's a heater in his hand. It's a fresca. Fresca. Fresca. He's drinking a fresca and ripping a heater at half time.

Incredible. Awesome. With the third overall pick in the 2022, this draft, I'll take John Thompson and the towel slung over his shoulder. Oh, that's pretty good. Now, there's a better towel. There's not.

There's not. There's not. If you want to tell me that Jerry Tarkhanian chewing on his towel is better than John Thompson just slinging. You're high on drugs. It's way significantly. That's a try hard if you're the shark. Nah, John Thompson flings it over. Absolutely.

100%. John Thompson's towel is more iconic in my opinion. Thank you. And he actually, he'd be. Refusely sweated a lot. He wipes his brow with it. with the now y'all can we can debate this later with the fourth

overall pick I'm gonna take Kurt Rambus and I'm gonna take Kurt Rambus I'll take him off because not they're not Rex backs they're eyeglasses with with crokeys yeah crokeys yeah it's the guy

wore eyeglasses with crokeys for the Lakers is really cool yeah you know I used to wear glasses you know that yeah sometimes I was like I'd like to wear these fuckers in my helmet I went to the contacts place as a teen. After 20 minutes

trying to put contacts in my eyeballs, I gave up and walked out of the store. They were like, sir, you haven't even I'm out. Get it, Kurt Ramvis. Back then, the contact lenses were glass, dude. Yeah. I'm going, I have a big, big board.

I'm going to go... Good for you, Reid. I'm going to go Marshawn Lynch's Skittles. Fuck! Skittles and Hennessy. Oh, what? You can't do that? Yeah, I can. He does it.

together. He's holding both. I was told this was a peril. He's not, he's not to know, it's accessories. But I got to push back and read, you know, I would never push back on you for any, like, I'm not pushing back just to sink your draft. I just feel like you can't take two. Arbiter says you got to pick Hennessier's Skittles. This

untrue. I'll go Skittles. It's not true. That's the right pick of the two, Reed. Okay, it's the right pick. Honestly, that's, you just murdered my board. I don't think it counts because you can't see it, but I would like to let the record show that I would like to, I like Doc Ellis's acid through the no hitter on acid.

That's a good one. Would that count? No, because you can't see it. You can't see it. But let the record show. I was thinking about it. That's what made me think, you know, that heater, Lendos, and that's maybe what you were thinking about.

Maybe. It was Doc Ellis. That's an incredible story for those of you that don't know, dude tripped acid and didn't realize he was going to pitch that day and then through a no hitter. So I guess I'll go with Lawrence Taylor's lightning bolt earrings Oh sick Yeah

Great pick It's a good it's a good one Only a guy on mounds of cocaine Can wear those and like actually live up to it No doubt That's a great pick Yeah I'm going Dion Sanders headband on his neck

Okay A neck headband from Dion Sanders I know exactly Like no one else has done that dude Who like that's being a trailblazer. Hey, what website did you find these on? None.

It's so suggestive. It is so suggestive like headband. This is where you wear it on your head and he was like, nah. We're it on my neck, bro. The closest one of that Ben Wallace put headbands around his arms. He's jacked. He's jacked. Virginia Union.

My third pick, I'm going Michael Crabb Trees chain. Oh, snatched. Akeep to leave. He lost the draft, dude. Akeeb to leave No, I'm gonna I'm taking it so I can give it to a Keeb Are you giving it to a Kee?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly Yeah, there we go That's right, I keep will be on my team Good pick FAP five, black shoes, black socks Great pick I like the pick Yeah, it's good

I like to pick yeah Black shoes and socks We, Arbiter Arbiter Yeah, you're gonna have to pick Yeah, you're right, no, no, no No, no, it's only fair No, it is only fair

Yeah, it is true It is true. No, y'all are wrong. Sox or shoes. That's how I felt, making, but you argued with the other side. Respectfully, bro. Respectfully, like, they're... You can make an entirely different selection of you.

Yours was way more flagrant than Reed was like, let me get a drink and a and a food item. Okay, this pick. He's not anything. This pick, I got the black socks. With my next pick, I got the black shoes. Fab five.

Really? Back to back. That is incredible. You might win the draft off that. stupid shit. Okay, go ahead. I'm going to go to the chain.

Ah, this one's good, but I don't think I should. We'll have a long honorable mention, cowboy. You'll get it off. Yeah, yeah, okay, cool. I'm going to go Chris Long's tort all. Yeah. Oh, it's the most functional accessory we've talked about.

That accessory, literally, like, we're not here without that accessory. You can't see it, but I'm going to allow it. There's no read. There's no Matt. There's no us doing a podcast. There's no building here. Like, that is all thanks to Tort All.

And I want to take, I want to look into the camera and thank Tort All. And it's a podcast, so it's pointless that I'm looking into the camera, but I want to thank you Torto or whoever makes Tort All for all of this. All these blessings. because certainly I wasn't going to spend any money I made in St. Louis on this fucking studio. But it's the Tortoll help me there too.

That's my, I ain't touching it money. So two picks here? Great. Seagent. Seagent Pharmaceuticals Incorporated. Can I do Tiger's Red shirt? Hell yeah, you can. That's a great pick.

Oh, Tiger Sunday Red. But I got a lot to choose from here. I'm going to go with John old rudes helmet nice um from nineteen eighty nine on the guy was just out there in the fucking in the infield with a with a with a with a helmet dude having helmet always safe now there was good reason for that I think you got drill with a ball or something right so it's scary and I'm not making light of it but it was dope like when I was a kid I was like that guy's

different John orrude's helmet you like the pick don't you I do like the pick yeah wait till you get to my honorable mentions, you're going to be like, Jesus Christ. I'm going to go. These are great. I'm going to have a great. Yeah, we got to do. Honorable mentions are going to be lit. We're going to take three minutes to end this show.

We'll do honorable mentions, Reed. You'll get them out. I'm going to go James Winston's crab legs. He's just. Too much time around facts. Dr. Fax there. We had it. All right.

I'll take that one back. I'll go. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And I'll channel Dr. Faxx right now and say the pick has been made. I'm allowing to take back. I'm allowing to take back. I allowed you a take back. Well, no, that's fine. I'll make that pick.

I was trying to make something. Take it back. Be aggressive. Be aggressive. I've already written it down in all caps. All right. Cool. James Winston's crab legs.

Okay, good pick. I hate to sound like the cowboy here, but. No, please sound like the cowboy. A big long list here to choose from. You want me to do on a. auto draft like in fantasy basketball because you're just struggling right now. You drafted black socks and black shoes.

I'm not struggling. That was a good pick. Do you want to hear who I'm deciding between? This is like the 2008 Rams draft. Are tattoos in play? Sure. Trem Pround's tattoo? No. I'll go. Your board's pretty big. Pick anything.

With the fire hair, which was fake. Andre Agassi's headband. Okay. And Richard Jefferson's RJ-tat was the tattoo I was thinking about. And I don't know. My God. Iverson's arm's sleeve, of course. Yes, we didn't even draft something.

I know we didn't go chalky because everybody's only got five picks. Lane Johnson's dog mask. Lane Johnson's dog mask. You know, I know what you're doing, but. Ho Grant's Rexpects. A little bit more my dog mask. Oh, oh. Even though he was better.

It was my dog mask. No. Yes, dude. I ordered that. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. No, I know. I know. I know. No. Ho Grant. Ho Grant. Rexbex. Best best best best. Horace Grant. Yeah. Best Rex Bex ever. Ho Grant. Better than the glasses with the crokeys. Oh, I don't consider those rex specs. E. Dick. E. Dick. E dick. Dick. Yeah. The E dick neck roll. So here's something we didn't talk about. Matt Patricia's pencil. I was really on the verge of drafting the player. Yeah. Not because it's cool. Like I would tell Matt, like, didn't really get that. I love Matt, and I would tell him that. But because a pencil is like a player

that you want on your team, you know, you can, like a pen, you're not going to have any warning when that thing runs out of gas. A pencil, you kind of have, you, it's communicating. It tells you, like, we're down to the nub. You can also, a pencil will, will fix its mistakes. A pen cannot do that. So I'm really into the pencil. We also didn't do red hourback cigar. Somebody brought that up. yesterday. Jim McMahon's headband. Michael Jordan's gold chain at the dunk contest, like when chains were really fucking cool because they was just gold. What about Michael Jordan's left elbow sweatband? That's iconic. Exactly. And there's a bunch of thought about it. You got you did Andre Agassiz's headband, which I like, but like Bill Walton's red headband for the Blazers.

I just say you in Andre Agassi red headband. It's got the, it's got the twisty ties in the back. It's like fucking, you know, teenage mutant ninja turtles. Yeah, that's cool. Who was the red one? That's my favorite. That's it. Yeah, yeah.

Okay, pick's not that bad then. This is what I'm talking about. Oh, yeah, yeah, you know what, good pick.

Okay, thank you. Really good pick. Thank you. Really good pick. Because you really like burst out laughing. Well, part of it was to get in your head.

I felt this big. Really? Yeah. I'm a sensitive cat. I am. But cool, I know, you saying that erases it all.

Yeah. I feel like I'm six seven. Givesmanship. Try to get you off your game, even though the giraffe was over. You did. Yep. That was a great pick. Thank you.

We didn't do JJ Reddick's undershirt. Yeah. We didn't do No Mar Garcia-Para's batting gloves. Yeah, that's right. Or Raffin the Dolls, this is two inside baseball, Raf and the Dolls underwear, he picks his B-hole before every serve. We didn't do Pete Rose's gambling receipts. Yeah, that's a good one.

Birdman's free. bird tad on his neck. My favorite tattoo of all time, Chris's greetings from Virginia. Greetings from Virginia. Who won? Oh yeah, who won? But here's the problem, dude.

I think we should ask Twitter who won, read. I don't think I should make that decision. Maybe when we make a graphic tonight, we could post it in the next couple days and ask who won, post a poll. Fuck, yeah. I mean, that'd be great. Let's post a poll. Let's ask the people. That's how things get done.

Actually, we'll ask the people, and then we'll make it electoral college. I do like the LT Lightning Bolt pick. I haven't thought of that. Thanks. To read off the teams, Chris went Howie Long's

Cowboy Collar, LT's Lightning Bold Earrings, Dion, his headband around his neck, Tiger's red shirt, John O'Rood's helmet. I went Lend Dawson's Cigarette, Marshawn Lynch Skittles,

Michael Crabtree's chain, Chris's Toritall, and James's crab legs. You might a low-key won that draft I know I won the draft. I don't know. Let's not get carried away here. I was being nice, but we definitely make it and win it.

Now, I'm not being mean. You told me you didn't prepare that hard for it. Oh, but I feel great about it. No, I think I won. Okay, okay, okay, okay. John Thompson's towel, Kurt Rambis's specs, the Fab Five black socks, the Fab Five black shoes, Andre Agassiz's headband.

Honestly, after seeing the headband, man, the drafts a lot better. Thanks. No, I... But not that good. Again, being nice. I think I won the draft, guys. I don't feel good about all the drafts, but I feel good about this one.

I'll say that after every draft. You're definitely top two. Top two. Who's bottom one? That'd be the cowboy. No! Cowboy Reed, yeah. Every time, every time we do a draft, you put me at the bottom and I really don't think...

Maybe Reed sensitive. Okay. Number one pick in people I love, Cowboy Reed. That's no fucking bullshit. Love you too. Love everyone. Love the listeners. Take care. Bye.