Green Light with Chris Long - Kirk Herbstreit! On College Football Gameday, His New Book & CFB Week 1 Recap. Bluegrass Music and Bathroom Studios. Chris and Dr. Fax Mailbag.

Episode Date: September 7, 2021

(02:00) - Hello, Layup Line, Good and Bad: Bluegrass Music Festivals, Florida State vs Notre Dame, Macon's Bathroom Studio and Sickly Dogs. (29:42) - Kirk Herbstreit on His New Book 'Out of the Pocket,' Early Days of College Football Game Day, Working with Lee Corso, Preparing to Call College Football Games and College Football Week 1 Review. (52:47) - Mailbag with Chris and Dr. Fax: Cats, Floss, Q Tips and Bidets. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Download the app. Bet big, win bigger. I got to tell you, I really like the sound of that. And with WinBet, it's just that easy. From boosted parlays to live in-game odds on every major sport, WinBet has what you need to win. So if you're in Colorado or in Indiana, Michigan, New Jersey, Tennessee, or right here in Sweet Virginia,

sign up today to receive a special offer, risk-free, $500 sports bet. download the win bet app now or visit w-y-n-n-n-bett.com. Download the app, bet big, win-bigger. And let's get after it. Terms and conditions apply must be 21 or older and present in state where win-bet is available. Gambling problem, call 1-800-2707117. My favorite Saturdays are when game day and the game are in the same location because

Bear and I, as soon as game day is over, we're football junkies. We're fans. We sprint as fast as we can to the Allstate bus. We've got this great back of the bus, five TVs, crank up the audio, air conditioning's down, room is dark in the back. We just sit there and watch games and yell at each other about picks or whatever it is. We do that until I call the game that night at 8 o'clock. So we sit there for seven hours and watch football. Maken's joining me from a bathroom.

Yeah, I'm in a bathroom, and I'm on Zoom. And I'll explain all that here in just a little bit. Make, I'm eating a Bobo's oat bar. They sent us free swag. Really, they sent it to Reed his crunchy ass. Shout out to Bobo's and Reed's crunchy ass. Shout out to your

big bearded square face, eating more food on the audio podcast for the people. Misfonia snitch. You're in a bathroom. That's probably not great for the misophonia. That monstrous echo. We'll talk

about that in a bit. Apex North Carolina Hello They can hear that echoing in the other powder room At wherever you are This weekend we thought up a fantasy football punishment While we were at the music festival there You want to hear it?

I do want to hear it Because when I see the 39 text messages Unread in that chain I don't always get through all of them I hate to break it to you So you really didn't read it We had a whole discussion I saw the picture up top and I think I have an idea.

Let me explain. The loser of our fantasy football league, the unlucky or just objectively horrible fantasy football player that loses our league is going to have to drive a mutually agreed upon beater. And not any beater. I'm not talking about like a dusty old sedan that you'd see in an 80s cop movie.

We're talking about like a PT Cruiser or a Suzuki sidekick. paid for by the league and it's going to be driven in perpetuity by the loser of our fantasy football league every year. Now the details are this beater's going to have to be driven for a month.

During that month, they don't have to drive it exclusively because we have a lot of dads in our league. Like we don't want to put the kids in peril driving around in the back of a PT cruiser. No, sir. But once a day you have to get in that car and you have to drive it somewhere.

I don't care if it's Quiznos. for a sandwich that you weren't going to eat otherwise at 10 p.m. Because you forgot to drive it earlier in the day. Or maybe if it's you, you probably are going to drive it only when the sun's down. But you have to prove that you drove it by taking a picture and posting it to social media. Now, the question is, somebody's on Facebook, 100 followers. Not a big deal. I feel like we should have to post the picture onto my Instagram story every day for 31 days or 28.

We can do February. with loser and P.T. Cruiser, Suzuki sidekick. Hey, Cowboy, Reed, you got any suggestions on the whip? There's a 2006 Dodge Stratus for $1,700 in B.A.B.A.S.Y. Virginia. What color is it? It is gray. And we don't want like a high Carfax score. Yeah, there's also a 2001 Ford Taurus wagon for $1,700. That's in Charlottes. So that's white. Oh, no. I'm, I read, you're not going sadistic enough.

We need to be really sadistic. Make, you got any, uh, you got any reaction to this? I drive a Dodge Stratis. It's from a movie. I, uh, so you said in perpetuity. Uh, whatever. Sorry, Reed. Whatever.

Reference is correct, please. Hey, Reed. Hey, correct him, please. There's a, there's water coming out of a, well, a waterfall shower head, behind me. Ghost, I don't know. There hasn't been a shower taken here in 15 hours. So you know, if you're listening at home, that is the sound of the misophoniac sitting in a bathroom, dripping water perpetually during the podcast. Makin, will you agree to the terms of this fantasy football punishment? The other guys in the text, they all said I, they said A, they said I. I don't

know how you type that out. I never know like in the movies when in Braveheart, they're going to go like unite the clans. Everybody says I. Do you spell that A-Y-E or do you just put an I? I responded almost immediately with A-Y-E. So, yes, I am on board. My question was going to be, do I have to put the car seat in and is there a baby on board, suction cup? Nope. I think somebody's being let off the hook easy with the late-night Quiznos run, because can you imagine me, for instance, my showing up to showing appointments.

in a stratus, in a whatever these cars are, a PT cruiser, a Suzuki. If I'm toting around psychic, if I'm toting around clients, that's a pretty hilarious punishment. I think we might need to up the stakes,

if anything. Really? You think we got to up the stakes? Well, I think everybody in the fantasy football league puts one bumper sticker on this car. How about that? That's good. and you also said the league funds that I had a question about that. So I'm contributing to the purchase of this car?

No, I'll buy it, make. We know you don't like to part with your money. Sick, sick. One-tenth of a car is going to be like $40. It's going to be a piece of shit, dude. Don't worry about it. Oh, cool. Okay.

In. Okay. All right. So we got to figure out the car. We'll figure it out by the end of the week because the carnage begins. And, you know, the people thought you won that draft. That's great. James Coe was impressed.

Just more pressure on you. Just more pressure. Hey, I'd rather be the man in the arena, you know, than the skeptic, the critic outside, taking pot shots, you know? I'm on public enemy number one. Nobody likes me in this league. All I do is win this league. Let's go.

I'm fine. I'm fine carrying that burden. Rather be the man in the bathroom than the man in the studio. Hey, lay up line. That is going to be rolling and tumbling by the great McKinley Morgan Field. Muddy Waters. And I'll explain why in a little bit. Talking music.

So that leads me to my good, mate. 48-48 festival. I mean, is there a better than good I could do? This was the perfect weekend. This was the perfect weekend. Thank you, Snowshoe. Thank you, state of West Virginia, which, by the way, is a top five state. Gorgeous.

Every time I go, I don't want to leave. I would put it in the top five. And by the way, I got in a big argument. This is a bluegrass festival, by the way. 4848 turned out to be the altitude of the festival, which was interesting to find out as I started to partake in all my weekend activities because as some of you all know, the deep end is closer to the stairs into the pool

when you're at almost a mile high. I argued with a guy with dreads that were 18 years old about the origin of the John Denver song Country Roads because if you read about it, you guys can use that Google machine at your fingertips. That song was written about Western Virginia, not West Virginia. So we'll let them have that song,

but the state is lovely. Not without incident. Getting into this festival was difficult for your boy. Tundra's in the shop, as you know, so I have my old land cruiser, which I love, but I never drive at three hours. We have several issues with this land cruiser, one of them being that it is not currently

how do you say inspected inspected yeah so I get on the road and not 30 minutes into my drive state trooper I mean I don't know how they see these things I mean they're color-coded obviously but my man was gun and radar and here I am creeping along in my in my land cruiser

and he pulls me over like he's got you know wild turkey vision and next thing you know he's right me a ticket he was he was very nice about it for the record. He asked me if anything was wrong with the car. I said, no, sir, not that I know of. Well, boy, did that turn out to be wrong. Not only did I realize that the speedometer is broken and reads zero the entire time I'm driving 30 minutes later, but I said the festivals at 48-48. I ran out of gas due to a faulty fuel gauge at 46-48. I was sitting there with no service on the side

of the road. As excited as I've been in six months, let me be honest. to get to this festival. I mean, you know when you compete with your ways and you're like, I need to get there at 259, not 305, like it says. I just don't, I don't accept that. I was 258 up the hill and I ran out of gas because of that fuel gauge and I was sitting, I submitted to my situation. You know, there are times in life where you have to stop fighting it. I had no service. I had no gas. I popped the hood and I sat in the back of the trunk and watched hundreds of people drive by with that, does he need help face? Which is one of the most uncomfortable experiences in the world.

The view was good. I was waiting for Kenny, my buddy, who was up behind me. But it took an hour, an hour. And when I pulled around the corner, when somebody finally brought me a gas can, I was 300 yards from the resort. 300 yards from the resort. So great festival, had a lot of trouble getting there. John Denver wrote about Virginia.

I also spilled a bunch of milk in my car over the weekend. I went to get milk for the cereal, dropped it six inches. West Virginia milk doesn't stay in the fucking carton that well. I mean, it was spraying like the inside of the Titanic, bro, all over my, all over my car. It still smells like milk. I got pulled over. My speedometer didn't work. I said that.

This festival was not without bumps in the road, but it was one of the best weekends of my life. You said the speedometer wasn't working? Yeah, it wasn't working. So is that easier? than you think to navigate or more difficult because you just go with the flow or what? I go with the flow, but you know, I said Land Cruiser. I don't want you to get it twisted here.

It's a creeper. We got a V8 Corvette engine under the hood there. So you pull up and you think. So I actually do have to be careful. I kind of was eyeing the speedometer on ways. But there's not exactly a lot of speed traps in West Virginia. And by the way, that 250 East drive, if anybody's done the 250 East drive,

the snowshoe from Virginia or somewhere, it is the most gorgeous stretch of road in America. I put it up against any stretch of road in America. 250 East through Western Augusta County, through Highland County, into West Virginia. It's amazing. And do you mean 64 West by any chance? I don't.

Okay. Yeah. If any of you have ever left your home out there listening to this podcast, driven roads, this road is amazing. But I saw everybody. I saw Green Sky. I saw Goose. Cowboy.

Goose is a party. Goose is a party. Did you see a bunch of white people do and the white people shake? We saw a lot of pasta, which is, it's like white, white rosters.

They got the, the white dreads. Saw a lot of that. Saw a lot of people, you know, on stilts and neon costumes and all types of stuff. But I saw Little Smokies.

You mentioned Little Smokies as well. And Motet. There's a guy named Joey Porter and Motet that plays the Keys. If you've heard of Motet, this guy is a, fucking wizard, bro. Yes, Joey Porter like the football player. No, this guy's amazing. I saw him at 1 a.m.

on Saturday night. So, it's a great time. Would recommend 48, 48, 48 festival. The come down is legitimately a double entendre. You're coming down the mountain and everything's wearing off. And you just can't wait to get down to out to.

By the way, it's 40 degrees out there right now. Up on top of that mountain. I was in a hoodie and fleece pants. I was in heaven, man. It was amazing. weekend. I think it might be a bit of a silver lining that you ran out of gas moments from the resort, because if that's, if you're out of gas during your come down, trying to get home, that might be a worse scene. No, you're absolutely right. I thought about that. Oh, last thing that's wrong with my truck, on my way home, it happened to be raining. And it was like, you know, 51 degrees in raining.

And my right passenger window doesn't go down. So I'm driving through Highland County. And I'm feeling Highland County. Highland County's wet. My face is wet. It was a Herkulean effort, but it was well worth it. Great fucking festival, man. I met some really, really amazing people. I mean, amazing people I met.

Have you kept track of how many times you've run out of gas? In my life? Yeah. Setting over under at 10. I mean, we're definitely over, I think. It's unbelievable. I just don't, I can't imagine. When you have a faulty fuel gauge, this one's not on me.

It's like being a serial killer and getting, you know, one body cleared. You know, like DNA didn't match up. This wasn't my fault. It was the fuel gauge's fault. Honestly, when you're coming down from a weekend like that, there's nothing better than watching a bunch of college kids just struggle. Made me feel better about myself.

Turn the volume down. Throw on some muddy waters. Muddy waters is the official come down music. Get a lamplit room, watch some college football, and let that new muddy waters play. play that dropped recently. That leads me to my bad. It's being a Florida State fan. Being a Florida state fan has to be bad. I really did the watch a Florida State game thing last night. You know, I was on the come down. Nothing's better for the come down than some college football

at night, especially two storied programs like that. This was good for college football. I mean, it looked good for college football. Doak was packed. A lot of gold out there. A nice national matchup that was high scoring and competitive and had ebbs and flows and ups and downs. But that third quarter by Florida State was implosion isn't a harsh enough word. I think we need more hard consonants in the word implosion if we're going to use it for what Florida State did in third quarter. They were in control of that game and they were doing like every dumb thing in the dumb thing encyclopedia when it comes to football.

They were incurring false starts on third and goal, you know, and getting knocked back. And overtime, they had a penalty that they survived and then missed the field goal. They gave up a screen for 70 yards on like third and 17. Not to mention the kid through like two picks rolling right in the third quarter. I mean, one of them for a three-yard gain behind a receiver who's just like, don't throw it to me. I mean, he's blanketed. Florida State, this was as sloppy a third quarter as I've seen. And it's a shame because that team is.

talented. But oh boy, those Notre Dame offensive linemen are big. I might watch some Notre Dame games this year for sure and bet on them in four minute mode because those cats are big. But Florida State still got back in the game. Kudos to them it looks like, and we'll talk to Kirk Herb Street about this. That's good for the ACC. They're competitive at the very least because Notre Dame is a big, good physical football team. This is off the top of my head. Duke lost to Charlotte. Georgia Tech lost to Northern Illinois. Clemson took a loss to a good team. UNC, a contender lost in Blacksburg.

I don't know about this conference of R.C. Long, but those Wahoos haven't given up a point. I know that much. Undefeated, too. That's right. Average in 43 points a game. Check out the whoos. But don't check out the Seminoles.

It's just going to be a tease. You're going to be like, who is this football team? And I really do feel for Florida State fans. So this is, that's my bad. I don't mean to make light of what I hope is not a serious situation, but are there any muddy waters in your home right now? There are muddy waters in my home. You heard about it. That's a terrific segue. Another thing that aided the come down from this weekend was, of course, me waking up this morning with the kids. And there being copious amounts of dog shit, like modern art spackling the crate that Willie sleeps in.

Now, I don't know if he picks something up at his boarding school or wherever he just started going or if he ate one of the cicadas that he eats with regularity. The fucker brings cicadas inside in his mouth. I hear them like buzzing in his mouth like they're alive in there like Jonah inside a whale. I don't know if it's that or if it's the boarding school, but my man is pissing out of his ass. And we were like, let's just let's hang on. It looks like he got most of it out this morning because I don't know how much shit a dog can hold in their. stomach. So this afternoon, what do we do? We put him in the crate again. Well, he isn't shitting poop. He's shitting blood now. So, uh, yeah, Willie shouts out. He's at the, the,

the doggy, um, primary care right now. Uh, and hopefully he'll be back later. I mean, you talk about like really being in that mental washing machine that is, uh, Sunday night, Sunday scaries after a big weekend, sun goes down and you start to feel it. That dog didn't help, but I care for my four-legged friend, unlike some people. I really care for them. Awesome prayers to Willie. Give us an update on Willie as soon as you know. I sure will.

I sure will. What you got? My good is technology and modern advancements. Chris, I'm looking at my laptop screen right now and seeing you. I'm talking into this delightful Yeti microphone. And you're talking about my setup. I'd way dry sound better than half our Zoom guess. with this setup I've got going on right now.

AirPods in my ears, that's how I'm hearing you, about 250 miles away from Studio J, wireless internet, that's a banger, sound machines. I've got a sound machine going because my seven-month-old is about seven feet away from me right now as the crow flies in the bedroom, taking a nap. And I'm in a bathroom. I have indoor plumbing all around me. I've got a toilet about 18 inches to my right.

I've got a shower behind me with one of those waterfall showerheads. You might have heard a bit earlier in the program. Not maybe not an advancement. The rubber ducky seems to be a bit of a constant throughout the generation, but got a yellow rubber ducky right here behind me. So I'm just so, so terribly excited to be able to join you here on the pod from afar. You know? Yeah, you definitely, but I know you're saying your audio is good,

but if you're on the phone with somebody and you're on the shitter, like you've got that going on. You know, like when you can't call somebody from the bathroom because they know exactly what you're doing. I've got like bathroom reverb. You have big bathroom reverb. You have big bathroom reverb, bro.

Like so, I mean, it's entertaining. Do we have a bidet in there? Nah, nah, but nice shelving. We've got like a lattice shelving, tile surround. This shower is huge. Yeah, here we go. Here we go.

You might think great. Yeah. Not so fast, my friend. You can't stay warm in such a spacious shower. I mean, the air is just going out everywhere. Is that what you tell your, uh, your, your high price clients? Because I know they're looking at some big shower. Oh.

Well, hell yeah. I tell them to put the glass up to about six inches from the ceiling. This glass is too low. Okay, got it. Too roomy. So, hey, if you're seeing a house, house with making and it's not glass to the ceiling don't buy it got a nice big tub right here just don't buy the house okay i know some of you guys are like hoping to be fans converted to to clients um and when

you get there don't buy the showers without the glass of the top hey name that tune it was labor day weekend i was 17 i bought a coke and some gasoline uh it's one of those radio songs what i mean one of those radio songs no i mean seriously i i can't i can't name it it sounds familiar but it's one of those like Tim McGraw, Tim McGraw, something like that. It was a little day weekend, I was 17. I bought a Coke and some gasoline. Yeah.

I thought you were going to say Tim McGraw, barbecue stain, which is what most folks say. It's not something like that. Well, ironically, you do forget something like that in this, in this situation, because it took me about 30 seconds to remember it. So my bad is being sad. Okay.

Shout out to Mr. Mackey. Yeah. I retired from a job on Saturday night, I guess my first retirement. And I've been sad about it ever since I knew it was coming a couple months ago, but especially so over the last 72 hours. Gratitude is good, perspective is good, mindfulness is good, sadness is bad. And I've been wallowing.

I've been wallowing in a pit of despair that this coming Saturday will be my first outside the Virginia Sports Network booth for the first. time in 13 years. I was a producer of sorts in that booth, spotter, statistician for a fine outfit. And no matter if the whoos were winning or losing, it was the gig I was born to do, Chris, plain and simple. So thanks to Dave Kane, voice of the Wahoos for a great run. No thanks to you, Chris Long, for flooding my extracurricular bucket with a burgeoning podcast. And now I have to pick one. So my, I say so long to a great passion of mine and hello to another great passion of mine arguing with you twice a week. Yeah, I mean, let's make it like five see each other more often.

Hey, make, you were really good at that and you took a lot of pride in that. And I think a lot of our listeners had no idea you had such a, when they saw that picture, they were like, holy shit. Like, makes up there in the big time. He's in the, he's in the press box. you're about as big a UVA fan as anybody I know and you you definitely have a a pension for making the losses about you how do you handle losses up there in that booth how did you over the last 13 years like were people allowed to talk to you that's so unfair no I don't think it's unfair I think it's true I mean but I started with a compliment no but

you're right I I took the losses very hard I will continue to just from the stands and not the booth and the wins were religious. About 75 years from now when I'm dying, I'm going to think back and likely say that I went out with a national title in hoops and an orange bowl and football when in reality I went out with a very lopsided game against an FCS opponent. But you're not wrong. These games likely mean too much to me. But I grew on that front. To be fair, this is all about growth and change and evolution. You feel me? I feel you, but I don't feel you on the 111 years thing.

You used to say you wanted to kick the bucket earlier. I think you said it on this podcast. You called death a checkpoint. That's right. That's right. Hey, love is love. I'm not here to tempt fate, you know? We're all on our own schedule.

I'm just very, hey, very sincerely, you were killer at that job and we don't take it lightly taking you away from it. I can remember riding in your car, and I've said this. on the pod before way back in the day, I think during college and listening to your play-by-plays. You used to, on the way to the bar, he used to make me listen to his play-by-plays,

like almost as a punishment, squeaking of shoes and the dulcet tones of making Gunner in like a high school or a college gym. On the tape player. On the tape player. And neither was the Georgia Dome. Now, I rarely did play-by-play,

but back when we did every single ACC, tournament game, ACC basketball tournament game, I would call the non-Virginia games back in 08. So I was very bad. It was a punishment called that UNC team with, with Ty Lawson, Tyler Hansborough. They won the national title. I don't apologize for making you listen to it, but it was a, yeah, a gig that took me to the garden and the Rose Bowl and all over the country, to other places too, like Winston-Salem and Haddysburg, Mississippi, none intended, and I'm going to miss it, you know? You said Haddysburg, what's the opposite of Haddysburg in all your travels?

The opposite of Haddysburg, Mississippi, and all of my travels is probably L.A. I mean, we called a game in the Coliseum against USC. I'd say L.A. is the opposite of Hattiesburg. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Man, now I'm going to be guilty the rest of the pod. But again, congratulations on a great run. Hey, one last thing. I forgot to mention this during fantasy football.

Big shout out to Kevin Bakke. Happy birthday to Kevin Bakke. I'm a big birthday guy. And his birthday was either Sunday or Monday. Wasn't sure. Full disclosure, but I called him at midnight, okay? If you call somebody at midnight, you know their phone's going to be off. You know, it could be technically considered a Sunday birthday or a Monday birthday.

That's like a cheat code for if you don't know somebody's birthday, you call them at midnight. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. Could not be more wrong. Okay. So as soon as it hit midnight on September 6th. But to the casual, the clock casual, it's kind of like that in-between zone. What's my birthday? July 9th.

That's correct. Congratulations. Thank you. Appreciate it. If you call me at midnight, technically on July the 10th, I'm going to know that you didn't know. I'm going to know that you didn't know. I'm going to call you on midnight just to be sure, because I don't look at calendars or clocks a lot. So, but it's funny that you said that about Backy because I texted him at 136 a.m. on his birthday.

So I was probably like number one. No, you'd much rather get the midnight text than the 1.30 a.m. The 1.30 a.m. text is thirsty. It's like weird. It's like it's 1.30 in the morning. morning. It's not a midnight text. After the midnight, like, you go off a ledge. You don't want to text the 1201. So that's when I was unacceptable. 136, you know, late game for the who's. It was literally, I looked down and saw, oh, it's September 5th, which in my brain meant back to his birthday. Good friend. All right. Yeah, no question. And I'm sure your, your call on September 6th meant a lot to them too. Without further ado, we do have Kirk Herb Street today.

and we're going to talk to him about I don't know, I know there's a lot of college football on this weekend, but he's got a book out and it's called Out of the Pocket and I really do think I'm going to peruse it. I'm not usually into reading books, as y'all might know, but I do think that he's being,

it sounds like, introspective, and he's had an incredible journey and he's definitely somebody who, when we turn on the tube, we enjoy tuning in for. So little book, little game day, and a little college football from the weekend. Here's Kirk Herb Street. And after that, stick around for a mailbag with facts.

What's up with Out of the Pocket? Tell me about that. Well, it's a long story. Gene Wojahowski co-authored it. He approached me during quarantine, way back in March, April of 2020. And he's asked me in the past. I never really thought I'd do it. This time he asked me. I just thought it was a good time to reflect. The book's about football. It kind of like my experience. with football being around the game quite a bit. It's also about how I got into broadcasting. A lot of people wonder, how did I get the game day and how I call the national championships and all these big games, how I kind of got into that world.

And then it's a little bit more than that. It's about football, fatherhood, both through the eyes of a kid, myself, just my dad was my hero. I know you can relate to this. You know, my dad, for me, growing up in Ohio, my dad played at Ohio State. He was a captain. He played for Woody Hayes and used to take me. He also coached with Woody.

So he would take me when I was little into the locker room and meet guys like Woody Hayes and Archie Griffin, who was at that time winning two Heisman trophies. It was like he was Zeus, like bigger than God to me. And I don't know, man. My world, unlike yours, it kind of took a turn for the worst. My parents divorced when I was about eight. And the world kind of turned upside down.

I went from living basically, imagine the movie, the Sandlot movie, where your whole neighborhoods, your life with all the buddies in the yard and all that to just nothing. I moved and both parents remarried a couple years later, both got a divorce again. There were stepmoms and dads and brothers and sisters going. I was in like eight schools and nine years. And I was a really introverted kid, really, really shy, painfully shy. And so I held everything in, didn't really talk about anything. And just went through a lot of trials and tribulations like we all do.

Just decided to kind of open up about that, be vulnerable about my past, and hope that the book resonates. This is not like a how-to book. It's more of just opening up and talking about we all go through trials and tribulations. We all have challenges. We all have adversity in life. And it's just me kind of telling my story. And maybe people will see a different side of me. But more importantly, I just hope people have been through their own.

junk, only their own world, their own things they go through. And hopefully this book will resonate and people will be able to relate to it some way. Well, I think it's cool because, yeah, when we see you up on TV, it's like, hey, this guy's got it. He's always had it going on. You know what I mean? Like you give off that vibe and that confidence and you're so good at your job.

And you said it. Like, you know, who knows what happens after football? I remember my dad trying to figure out what the heck he was doing. and the odds that he got a studio job, like in the early 90s. Like, this was a different time. There weren't as many media opportunities. And so I wonder, what was the origin story in a nutshell as far as, like, was it almost something else? Was there almost somebody else who took Kirkhurstreet's seat?

Who were they considering to be you? Man, that's great. It's a big part of when I talk to kids, like when I go speak to these teams and players, the coach asked me to talk to them. A big part is just finding a passion. You know, your passion was football, your whole life, and then you got done playing. And you kind of, life's not over and you got to find a new passion. In my case, I got done playing college football.

I was a business major at Ohio State. And Ohio State through, you know, a lot of the folks in the athletic department who hooked me up with a lot of interviews. And I was going down that conventional path. I was going to graduate in June and much of April, May, and going into June, I was, I was doing a lot of interviews. Just thought I was going to become pharmaceutical sales rep, medical sales, There was Worthington Industries, you know, all very, very lucrative jobs as a 22, 23-year-old,

making 80, 90,000 if you hit bonus, company car, 401K, everything you're kind of trained to do is try to go get a good job and make some money. And then I floated this idea to a local radio station, hey, if you ever need help, let me know. And they got back to me right early June, they said, we're actually going to want to hire you. We're going to pay $12,000, no benefits, nothing. nothing, but we think you'd be good at this afternoon drive, 530 to 7, and will you do it? So I had to do one or the other. I couldn't do both.

And so I don't know why. Every person, family member, anybody, friends, everybody I talked to is like, are you nuts? $12,000? Because, again, you don't know it's going to lead the game day. You don't know where it's going. I just, it sounded like a fun job talking sports. I'm a sports fanatic, and I just thought it'd be cool to do a talk show. And so I turned down all that stability and took a choice on passion and something I love,

not knowing, I didn't grow up with money. So $12,000 didn't sound terrible. I had two roommates who were splitting bills. So I just thought, what the hell? Let's go do this talk show and see what leads. 12 grand was going a long way. Yeah. What was the habit you had to when you finally got there and, and excuse me, so you got to finish telling your story.

but what was the hardest habit when you finally got to game day? This was August of 93. Yeah. And I got to ESPN for the 95 season. I was a sideline reporter. So I was two years later. And this is like your dad, there are no jobs. Yeah.

Very few jobs. And somehow there's a long story how I got to ESPN originally. And then while I was there in 95, Craig James, who was a superstar on game day with Lee Corso, he left to go to CBS. Right. Because CBS got the NFL package and they needed a studio guy. So he left. Job opened up.

They told me to come in and audition for it. They told me you're not going to get it. But as young as you, I was like 25. They're like young as you are, just to go through the process or be good for your career. And then I came in and I just did the best I could. And Corso and I kind of hit it off. I sweated my ass through that interview. I was terrified to do that.

I don't sweat because I'm nervous. I sweat because I'm uncomfortable. I sweat because I'm hot in the suit. Yeah, I'm always, I run hot. Like my air conditioning, like right now I'm in a hotel. It's set at 64. First thing I do, I walk in. I set it down at 64.

My house has set at like 67. My wife walks around inugs. I just run hot, right? And when I get on, when I get, I'm a shy guy. So when I get uncomfortable, I just get. that's my result. And so I'm sitting there next to the Lee Corset for the first time, and I'm just like uncomfortable, my God.

But I guess it went well. They ended up hiring me. And I was ironically in the middle of doing arena football that year, 95. And there was a guy named Kurt Warner who was lighting it up for the Iowa Barnstormers. And I was doing like every day, every week I was flying into Iowa and calling Kurt Warner's games. And the next year I was on game day. So I didn't really have any habits, man. the only habit I had is I knew that I was not a well-known,

like your dad is a very well-known player, very Bradshaw. I mean, think of all of them. Chris Collinsworth, Romo, on my set, Desmond, won a Heisman. I mean, everybody is a guy like you. You know, they won Super Bowls. I wasn't. So instead of being embarrassed about that, instead of being like, I guess I'm a nobody, I did the opposite.

I was like, I'm going to grind my ass off. So they might not know who I am. This is inside my brain. I'm going to grind my ass off. They might not know, like, where's Craig James? Who's that blonde-haired guy? What's going on? And I thought over time I could win people over by just being the most prepared,

the most dialed-in analyst on TV. Like, that was my own goal. And that became my kind of niche. You know, that's, to this day, that's what I try to be. Like, right now I got my board right here. I'm getting ready. I'm getting ready to call game. And as soon as I hang up on this, I'll go right back to, I feel so awkward if I don't stay that way.

I've had a lot of opportunities and some successes as a broadcaster, but I still see that guy in 1996. It's like trying to grind, trying to prove that he can do it, trying to show people I belong. And I don't think I'll ever really stop being that way. And I'm never going to consider, not comparing Tom Brady to me at all. But I love Tom about when I hear Tom talk and he gets emotional talking about, he looks at a mirror and he still sees a six-round draft pick. Like it's like, how does Tom Brady stay? How does he have his edge when he's done so much?

Paranoia. And paranoia can be good. You don't want to fail. Yeah, that's me as a broadcaster. I think it just makes me really relate to him on a lot of levels. Well, that's how a lot of athletes operate. And I know, like, you know, for you, you're an athlete at the heart. So it's like that competitive spirit and that, hey, it could be me.

When I get my name called, like, on the field, I don't want to be that guy. And, like, you don't want to be that guy in the booth. And I'm looking at your sheet and it's just covered in stuff. I've seen Joe Buck's sheet before. I feel like what's really cool when you guys call games, some of the stuff that colors the game in the most is the insight on the third corner with a backstory or a guy that you haven't heard of. Because we've heard all about some of these time time guys. And I think you guys do a really good job of that. Is there a game day location that you guys have yet to do that you would be really excited to do?

Man, I don't think we've been to your alma mater. I've done Thursday night games when you were there. But we've never had, we've had obviously been Blacksburg a bunch. I don't think we've been there. We've got to fix that. We've got to do it on the field. We've got to fix that. We've got to do it on the field.

Well, if there was any doubt that Kirk was the number one guy at ESPN, I mean, they put them in a location on game day and then they're flying them to a different one for a for a game Saturday night which is just wild. We'd love to hear about the mechanics of of your day when when game day is on one coast and a game is on another. But at this point, are you still learning new things about TV, be it game day set or live games or is it more of a muscle memory thing at this point? Gosh, that's awesome. First thing I would tell you is my favorite Saturdays are when game day and the game are in the same location because Bear and I, as soon as game day is over, we're football junkies.

We're fans. We sprint as fast as we can to the Allstate bus. We've got this great back of the bus, five TVs, crank up the audio, air conditioning is down, room is dark in the back. We just sit there and watch games and yell at each other about picks or whatever it is. We do that until I call the game that night at 8 o'clock. So we sit there for seven hours and watch football. Those are the great Saturdays.

So the Saturdays I have to fly, I mean, you can be going for. from Tallahassee to Eugene or, you know, Columbus, Ohio out to USC for a game. But ESPN does fly me in those cases. They have a Disney charter and they just take me from one spot to the next. It's a full day, obviously, to start one spot at 6 a.m. and then finish at 1 a.m. somewhere else. But again, when you do something you love, it's no big deal. I love your question about doing more than just, are you still growing and still learning?

I would tell you probably, Chris, when you're a defensive man, when you came out of Virginia and you were just freaky athletically and you were able to maybe have your get-off or your move you had. And then about the eighth year, ninth year, 10th year, you kind of became a different guy. Yeah, you get hurt and you got to ruin different skills. You got to change kind of the way you do things. Yeah. In our case, I'd love to talk to your dad about this. Like when I first was hired, I was an analyst. Like I didn't almost hear what other people in the desk said.

here. I got my comment ready. And whoever's going to come to me, I'm going to make my comment and I'm going to analyze my point. And that was it. I did that for first five years on the show. And then I don't want to say I got bored with that. I just started to become inquisitive and listening to Fowler or hearing like the bump, like how are we coming into this break or how are we going out of it? When I get done making my comment, what sound are we going to? I just became really interested in the totality of a segment and how my comment intertwined into the production of the segment. So I, no one told me to do that. I just kind of just started paying attention and listening and started to learn some of the, the terminologies that the TV people use.

And so I started about year six or seven started to become way more vocal and way more. By then, I felt like I had earned that after six years or so. Just way more inquisitive is probably the best word. And now, you know, 26 years into this, I'm, you know, it's like I have antennas and my radars up and I'm constantly, because what makes our show good, we have no teleprompter, we don't have a script, you know, we have an idea we're going to talk about certain games, but a lot of it is impromptu. A lot of it is trying to pay attention to what Des is saying.

And even though I don't have it written down, it's okay to, like we're doing right now. You just kind of improvise and adjust and throw a little jab or something at Pollock. And if you don't listening and paying attention or know where we're going after, it can really impact that in a negative way. So I think the way I'm growing is learning about every aspect of the show, studio television. And I watch your dad's show. I learned from watching them.

I watch Charles show. I learn, you know, from watching them. So I'm constantly, I watch TV in a very different way than the average person. because I'm I'm digesting and

dissecting what I'm watching as I watch it. Personally, I think it's probably been great that there's internet on planes now. I think probably back in the day, I'd imagine you were sitting on their board wondering what the score was for three hours going to Tallahassee, Eugene.

That's a game changer. But also, you talked about being on script. You guys have guest pickers regularly. What's the most you've had to pull a guest picker back in? one of your celebrity people going off script because that's what I'd always worry about live television.

You know, we were just talking we had Kane Brown who's a big country star on last week and it's amazing how these guys will play in front of thousands of people or as an actor perform in front of millions of people on TV and then they get on this show and they're a little bit out of their lane and they're a little uncomfortable.

And so more than any, you're trying to kind of encourage them to let their personality come out. There have been some guys, you know, I'm trying to think over the years. Will Ferrell was a guy that, you know, we're a hard out at 1159-59. And so the producers in my year, because I go last, it'll go Des, celebrity picker, Lee, me, and see, he uses me as his throttle, like, we got to pick it up. Like every pick it up, like every pick he's telling me because he knows I can either give him time back or I can eat some time up.

So as going from Des, to around, he'll say to me, hey, hey, hey, take your time, take your time, take your time. These guys are moving too fast. We got plenty of time. So then I'll go 30 second comment. Or the next time we're, oh, quick, we got, it's like we're in tempo offense. And, you know, then I'll just do like a five second comment. Because the celebrity, the guy you can't predict, man, sometimes there, Will Ferrell's going

on and on and you're just like, you know, or Eric Church when he's on, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, himself as an analyst. So it's not like he's like Tim McGrawl came on. He's like, man, my first concert was in Kansas. I'm going with Kansas State. You know, we're like, yeah, I've seen some of that. But you're saying Eric Church can really, he can pick them. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. Those safeties come down. Those safeties come down. We're looking at play action pass. It could be a real difference. Those corners can't hold up on an island. They're going to go play action. It's just like no shit. We got to have Eric Church on the show, make. Oh, yeah. That's right. Oh, man, dude. Yes. Yeah. You had that you ask him the lightning

question because I don't know if I believe this either. I'm so sick of it because we just keep talking about Blackspar because they win so many damn football games. But were you there and did the lightning actually hit Corso's car? I was definitely there. Sometimes I'll just say that, do you remember that time? Do you hear the story at all? I mean, it was a scary storm.

I mean, lightning just coming down all around. Lane Stadium at that time it seemed like it was just all aluminum seats so it was just easy for it to be a target he he got a lot of mileage out of that because that was Michael Vic was there oh yeah and the next year

he it was like I don't know what a hokey is but God sure does and I'm going with the hokey you know that became like his line I don't I don't know man I'll just say yeah I think it did I think he's safe, though, even if it did because, you know, they say the tires ground the lightning, which I don't know if that's fucking true or not. He wasn't in the car.

Okay, good, good. It was just he got hit. I was like, the way it sounded to me was Corso got hit with a bolt of lightning, and that's how he has such great energy, maybe. It said he was sitting at his car at Blacksburg. We've talked about game day. I want to rapid fire some college football questions before you get going and stare at that sheet again, because there was a lot of writing on there. First off, Ohio State, your guys.

is anybody challenging them in the Big Ten? Stanford Steve didn't think so. And are you encouraged or worried about that first half? Because it's a young quarterback, and it's the first damn game in the year. Yeah, no one knows better than you about the first half of the game. First game, college football, on the road, conference game, new quarterbacks, never attempted a pass in his life. I was really more impressed with what Ryan Day did in the second half in the adjustments

and the fact that they made some plays. I think it's actually a blessing in disguise that he went through some adversity. They're so good around him. I mean, NFL, Alave, Garrett Wilson, the tight end you're going to love. Jeremy Rucker, he's like 6'5, 250. He's an NFL guy. The line's the best they've had. I'm not impressed with their defense right now.

They've got concerns like they did last year. They've got to get way better on that side. But their offense, I don't, Penn State's the one team and maybe Wisconsin. in the Big Ten Championship or Iowa. But they're just so much more talented than everybody else in that conference. The other National Championship Hope radar deal this weekend is obviously that Clemson took a loss. And that's a hell of a game to put on your schedule first. This happens to teams every year.

You know, and then they've got to go about the rest of the season. But in the ACC, UNC could have had a leg up and they missed their chance. Does UNC have a path? And what do you think about the ACC? I look at it a little bit differently. I think Virginia Tech winning and the way Lane Stadium looked, that was a good thing, not from Charlottesville, but good for the A.C. You know what I mean?

I mean, the energy coming off your television from a game besides in Clemson, the way Florida State looked against Notre Dame, my boss, but man, that's good for the ACC. So North Carolina, they're going to, there still have plenty of opportunities to get where they want to ultimately get, which is the Charlotte, and to get to the ACC championship. Clemson, to me, is a little bit of a, there's so much better than everybody they play, but their running game or lack thereof, the offensive line issues, the quarterback who,

we just thought he'd step right in and look like Trevor because he did last year. Yeah. And he just, there's an unwillingness to run the ball, and that's such a big part of their offense. You know, if it's there, go, you know, and he's, he's kind of hesitant. I don't know if you watched any of the game, but he's like, he's real, like, in the decisive and they're taking away primary. And this, again, maybe the best defense in the country.

I get it. But he just looked really indecisive. And instead of saying, I'm out, because there was plenty of room to go, he just kind of kept holding on to the ball. So I want to see his growth and where they go. But I think the ACC right now, I want to see Louisville tonight, but it looks still to be like Clemson and North Carolina. Yeah, for sure.

Bam, my last thing here, quarterbacks, like, are they growing on trees, like they change coordinators. Everything seems to change down there, but one thing, and that's Nick Savin and talent. And I would say, like, it's a product of the talent, sure, but these quarterbacks, a la Mac Jones, Jalen Hertz, they've transitioned well in the NFL.

What do you think of Bryce Young? And where does Alabama keep getting these guys? I don't know what practice is like when you were with Philly versus New England, but in college, Nick Sabin, that's what, this is the point. He loses coordinators. he loses great players to the NFL

and he does such a good job not just recruiting but developing and in the weight room in the offseason and then when they get into spring they do a lot of good on good and then they tackle you go to an Alabama practice it's not like it's 2021 take it easy

they are crushing hitting it's not you don't see that in college a lot in Alabama they still do and then in camp this is my point this Bryce Young he's been seeing for four weeks really sophisticated, good on good, a lot. And so they make their practices so hard that when they get to a game,

it's almost like, I don't want to say easy, but easier than what they see in practice. And it's just what he's always done. You go to their practice, I mean, it's chaos, it's people getting yelled at, it's people, whistles blowing, run it again. You would think they never have a chance, but they do it on purpose. And then the games, it's like, holy cow, this is this. the easiest thing we've ever done. Coach it and out here blowing a whistle. You know, I don't have to face my own defense where they're showing me, you know, 18 different coverages. So I think that's why

they look like they were in mid-season form. They, they by far looked like the best team in a country, even with all those new players and Bill O'Brien call and plays. It's just a machine. Every year, it's like, well, we'll see. Maybe they're not as good. And then one weekend, you're like, oh, well, shit. I wish the other teams would practice like Alabama. I know. Me too. Kirk Herb Street, good luck at the game tonight, and we love watching you work, man. It's so great. We look forward to diving in that book a little bit. Congrats.

Appreciate it. Yeah, yeah. Take it easy, brother. Make what a nice guy, that Kirk Herb Street. He talked about it. Your dad said his line with Hall of Famers, and Kirk had a good career, but not that All-American Heisman Trophy Storybook career that those analysts normally get. So it's a very interesting career arc.

No question that he's the number one guy in college football and a pretty neat life when you're on the game day set and then go into live games. I presume they're police escorts involved. I'll have to, we'll have to ask him that next time. There's probably a lot of police escorts for him. But also, I think the most amazing thing about their job is I'm pretty sure they don't sleep as much as you think the night before. I mean, let's be real. I mean, buddies hanging out, you know, bars, restaurants, and I know they got to wake up at like four in the morning to do that show.

And they're up there every day looking like they got eight to ten hours. So they're troopers, man. They really are and they do a great job. Hey, make, have a great second vacation in two weeks. It's three weeks. Say what's up to facts and I'll see you on Friday. Yeah, you take care. going to the mailbag section in the show now give me your reaction to drake's new album

oh well that's awesome and also your reaction to macken's graphic of the uh drake album cover oh yeah that was great work shout out to ralph yeah shout out to ralph that was a great great edit um i think macken needs to get a little bit more hip on the current of that bad angle on macken there like kind of from the but he had no idea looks short i don't know i'd like to look short i I think he had no short. Oh, my God, dude. Oh, can you imagine? I just think it's more that he didn't get the reference at all.

And he openly was on Twitter. Like, I don't get this. Well, that was interesting because I texted him the graphic to make sure it was okay. And I gave him the reference. I said, hey, this is for Drake's new album. And Makin said, L-O-L-L-P perfect, love it. Oh, wow. So I didn't take Makin as a...

Bro, listen, read, read, read, read. the choir here is who you're preaching to about that little strategy by making which is just to totally misrepresent what he says off camera and off the microphone. So I fell for it. So how many fluorescent polo shirt makins out of five

are you giving that album? Me personally. Yeah, I'm asking Dr. Fax. As a Drake fan and a music fan, I'm giving it a two. Oh, man. Like I'm literally giving it a two. And the only reason why it has no, like, there's so many tracks that just personally are not for me.

There's so many skips. There's so many skips. I like the you only live twice track. I think Little Wayne and Rick Ross is on that. The 21 Savage and Project Pat, I think they have a track together with him on there. Yeah, it was good to see Project Pat on there. Yeah, for sure. And that's cool.

And that's more my speed. like Drake being on tracks like where it's two or one really gangster street rapper and then Drake. Somebody to bring his street crowd up a touch. I guess so. The co-sign that he's like, we're good here. I guess so, but it just, it didn't hit from me. But when it comes to sales, I thought Kanye would do better the first week.

Oh, that's what that's what it was. I thought Kanye, I thought, I thought Kanye. Kanye would do better and he did very well but Drake topped it. Like the longevity, we'll see what happens, but honestly for music and music fans, I love

it and it sparked more of their beef which you'll be interested in this. One song that Kanye Listen, Kanye left all the album a song where he was clearly dissing Drake but

guess who else was on the track with him? Andre 3000. And so, and listen, as a chess move, as a chess move after Drake dropped his album, he had someone inside of Kanye's camp

leaked that song to him. He leaked the disc song himself. So now it's putting Kanye in a light that, hey, like, you gave Andre 3000 this track without letting them know you were going to diss me. Even though you didn't put it out, it's crazy that you will put an artist

in that position to mix them in this beat. And so now Andre 3000 had to come out. So Andre 3000 did not know he was going to be on a song that was dissing. No, he got the track and like it was. Well, I was excited because I was like, oh, does Andre 3000 not like Drake? No, no. Bro, that's some slimy shit, dude. But it's.

That's slimy as fuck, dude. Are you serious? Yeah, like the, the disc track is out is out. But it's something where you have to listen. It's not something where you have to do anything. You don't put the goat in a bad position. It's bad. That's bad, dude. You don't do that to the goat. But it's a good track. And Andre 3000, he still sounds great on it.

Take Care or Nothing was the same. You seem like a Take Care guy. Definitely. I'm a little bit of both. I think nothing was the same was more front to back and Take Care had higher heights for me. But they're both great. And none of the album since. Both of those, bro. Both of those are so much better than this album. I agree with you. But I also felt that way about, everything he's put out the last five years. Okay. Okay.

What are your favorite and least favorite moments from this past college football weekend? Who. Favorite? Well, I mean, we had the South Carolina kid or man who played in that football game. I just, they were down to like their fifth quarterback, I guess, because of the pandemic, I assume, cowboy? Pandemic in injuries. Pandemic and injuries.

deadly combination. In situations like that, you just hope you have a former college quarterback who recently finished up named Zeb Nolan stashed away somewhere, this guy, four touchdowns, no interceptions? I mean, I don't think he practices.

He's like a grad assistant. So if you ever wonder, if you're a former college athlete, that dream you have about going back and playing, I used to have a dream that like I was still putting on my UVA uniform. Like, why are you dreaming about this? Like you're in the NFL. So evidently you could probably do pretty good.

Zeb Nolan, which also makes me wonder, akin to the conversation we had with Bruce Ariens last year, you know, pro teams, stashing, third, fourth quarterbacks at the crib. Don't come in. Don't get the, the pandi. Maybe college coaches. might want to consider having a decent

former college quarterback on the staff. I don't know how that works, Reid. He had eligibility left or something. Yeah, because of the pandemic last season, he was able to get an extra year. All college athletes from last year were given an extra year of

eligibility. And he was a grad assistant on the team, on South Carolina. One of the quarterbacks in the quarterback room went down with an injury, injured ankle and he was he became a member on the team also

besides that Clemson going down in a in a flood of mayonnaise I mean guys first off that we're eating mayonnaise this shit is cute that is absolutely played out like that was cool for a day

I mean objectively it was the Duke Meadows bow man let's dude had an objective to get on TV and go viral and he did it i would liken this to the crate challenge just no point nothing good happens as a result of you doing the challenge yo he's well disgusted that how do you not know that dude is not getting a duke mayo's uh sponsorship right now you couldn't pay me enough to eat a tub of that mayonnaise did you see me having to eat the mayonnaise here last year did you see that no you didn't see that no send him the link

right now so he can react to it please one of you you don't you don't like mayo bro i I hate mayonnaise. You're white, though. White people love mayo. I don't like mayo. I also don't like Ted Lassow. So, like, figure it out. There's like, I, that's a stereotype, Nate.

And it's probably true. But I, dude, and this bowl game, and I'm opting out of that bowl game in a heartbeat. If I'm a college player, if there was a Duke's Mayo bowl, give me some mayonnaise packets for my gift. I'm going to the pros. They're like, you don't even have a draft grade.

I'm just opting out. Was seeing Dabo Sweeney in front of a Duke's mayonnaise bowl backdrop lamenting. Starting the year own one at the Duke's Mayo Bowl. That was good for me. And I just seen a viral tweet going with Trevor Lawrence having to wear a full Bulldogs, Georgia Bulldogs warm up in the locker room today at work. So it looks like he's betting a little bit and he lost. Sucks for them.

But definitely my favorite college moment from week one goes to prime time. Dionne Sanders getting this first win. But the funny moment. That's Coach Prime. Coach Prime. Coach Prime. That's Coach Prime. That's Coach Prime.

So Coach Prime, I guess, is doing a guest coach system for his team, keeping it spicy and fun. and he had the rapper Gilly the kid on the sideline for the game. And during the game, a sequence plays happened where there was a fumble and a 50-plus-yard return where Gilly the kid, the guest coach, ran down the sideline with the player all the way to the end zone. And after the player scores, out of excitement, he sees how excited Gilly the kid is. is he tosses him to football and Gilly the kid spikes the football, which then turns into a penalty.

Oh, it's one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen. I mean, it's just, it was ridiculous. Okay. First off, Gilly the kid's a lefty. Secondly, it was like, it was like, he's a big Philly fan. Is he really? Yeah. It was like he, it was like he thought about it for a second.

When he got the ball, he was like, I could do one or two. things and then he just spiked the fuck out of it like over the line into the field and the referee was like unnecessary you know whatever uh gilly the kid but it's just how quick he did it it was just like he just knew if i get this ball i have to spike it you he had no choice he had no choice because your street cred goes down if you don't spike the football right when you like Like if you're, imagine him handing the ball back to the referee. Or just running off with it or something like that. That was like the perfect ending to, to that.

I'm glad it didn't affect him in the long run. You know, you know why you love this? Why is that? Marketing. It is. We had Gilly the kid on the sideline. Oh, look. A million dollars worth the game.

We had Gilly the kid on the side. His podcast, his podcast is very, very popular. And for, for recruitment, like, Coach Prime is doing everything right right now for Jackson State football. And congrats to them. And it should be a good next upcoming years for that program. Just have a wrap running next week to shove an official. That might be taking it too far.

Drake will be there in no time. Oh, my God. On his own. I really wonder what's their record. I wonder what team he picks this year. Oh, what team is Drake going to pick this year? I wonder, they should start making odds on that. Like, what team Drake is going to start, like, favorite?

Oh, it has to be Oregon because he has a deal with Nike. Oh, yeah. So it's definitely Oregon. So at the end of the day, like, watch out guys for some Oregon players or something being in a new Drake video or some type of commercial coming soon with the NIL. I guarantee it. If Texas gets hot, he's going to be the biggest Texas fan of the world. He's going to be nudging

Matthew McConaughey out of the way behind touchdowns. Yeah, another great moment, McKenzie Milton coming back from potentially career ending injury there. Last night, I mean, I felt pretty good about having Notre Dame Liveline

minus 10 because of that four minute presence and kind of the way they were out playing Florida State in the mental error department and it did not go that way partially because McKenzie Milton who I had forgotten

about walks into the game after a buddy from Florida State gets popped and I'm thinking to myself oh good this is a fucking cakewalk for me who is this kid oh finished six in the highs been

voting a couple years ago and he was like Brett Favreve out there he was like pitching the ball underhanded to people he was jukeing people. I had the sound on the game off and I was like, was it a lower leg injury? Because I'm pretty sure he just broke down that linebacker.

Yep. He did very well. Next man up mentality. He was ready. He was waiting for this opportunity. He went through a lot of rehab. 38 months or something, right? Bro.

33 months. Could you just imagine? Could you just imagine mentally like what that's like? And then they kept showing his dad. I was like, holy shit. No, they kept showing his mom crying on the sideline. And just like of excitement, like they told, they probably told that family, you'll never see your son play football again.

He was told he'll never play football again. And they never knew it would be tonight. They just show up every week. No, like, and it wasn't even, and like you said, it wasn't even because the kid got popped. It was because the kid's helmet fell off. Oh, the helmet fell off. It's the one, it's the rule, the one play.

You have to come out one play. And this dude goes in and sparks the team and his coach, lets him finish out the game. Yeah, he was incredible. Like, that's like unbelievable. might have a Nick Foles down in Tallahassee, Tallahassee, Tallahassee, Nick Foles.

No, they should just, what you call it, what they should do is scrap that stupid-ass wildcat, give that other quarterback some more play, and if you want to run a wildcat, running with your first quarterback, stop running Wildcat. It doesn't work for you guys at all. Wildcats also not as in as it was 10 years ago.

No, they had a series where they went Wildcat, Wildcat, Wildcat. That's what I'm saying. There's a reason people aren't running Wildcat with the frequency they used to. do. All right. A couple more questions, non-football. If animals could talk, which one would be the most annoying? Honestly, because I have a cat, I think cats would be one of the most annoyings because cats are very, very sassy and they have weird personality. So I feel like a cat would probably be like

talking like a lot of shit or just definitely under their breath. Yeah, just like, their breath like really cutting like commentary like could you imagine being on the phone and lying to someone why you don't want to go out and like i can i can imagine the cat being like this dude is lying he's not doing anything me blaming like uh you know like a birthday card being laid on the fedex guy and the cat's like you're a fucking liar or like or like hey i just shit in the house like come clean it up i just shit in my sandboxes by your your refrigerator i never Hey, check me out. Just climb this fucking cat house that's six stories high.

And I'm going to jump down onto your kid unexpectedly. Check this shit out. Someone told me this weekend that there's a myth about cats, that this is the reason why he never wanted a cat is that cats. While you sleep, there's sometimes sleep on your chest to steal your breath and your soul. Who said that? What, what geototin woman told you that? It wasn't.

No. It was. old Y receiver Chris Byrd Chris Byrd said that He believes that But here's the thing He believes that Bro here's the thing

A lot of people believe that That when cats sit on your chest they're stealing your soul They try to steal They steal your breath And some people believe when they're doing that They're stealing they're doing something to your soul Like and he said this with a straight face And we then went on Google

where there are a lot of people who agree with this somewhat strange story about cats. So this is the devil at work. This is, this is, you know, the other day I said the devil has no stats. The devil has like one stat. And that's however many cats are on the planet.

Bro, I told you, the devil is a liar. I don't want to get into that conversation with devil. Every once in a while with these cats, though, I'm like, yeah,

you guys are all right. Like the big fat ones, you guys are all right. You know, like come sit. Just sit down. I have a 20 plus pound cat. He's pretty big.

They should like file their teeth down a little bit too because those are essentially small tigers. They just try, they just destroy plants. Um, hey, there are, there are animals that can talk.

They're humans and they're fucking annoying, dude. So we've done this. We don't need to hear other animals talking. No, we don't. Well, actually, maybe we do need to hear other animals talking.

Tell us to get our shit together sometime. What is your most enjoyable personal hygiene activity? I like them all. You know, I like to be relatively clean, so I like them all. Q-Tip is such a chalky answer. I love the Q-Tip. Don't you love a good Q-Tip? Yeah, but I don't know why when I was younger, I put the Q-Tip too far a few times.

So I feel like I have PTSD with that. When it, when it like boings off your ear drum. Oh, whatever hits in there and that discomfort. it's very, very scary. Back of the ear hole. It's very, it's very, very scary. Respect the Q-tip. You know what I like?

What? Flossing. Flossing has been a new thing for me since my teeth have decided to unhuddle the fuck up a little bit. Yeah. As a result of it's a lot. It feels good. And then it's scary. Sometimes you get a little blood in there, but that's good.

It's normal. The dentist says it's normal. And there's just sometimes a sensation when you just get it. in there the right way and if there's like a nice piece of piece of meat that's maybe stuck that you didn't know and you get it out oh that feels real good oddly satisfied yeah it is huh for sure okay hey uh cowboy re just flashed this up combo invention and personal hygiene using a bidet that's a rich man sport so you probably know more about bidet no i'm not pro bidet man like You stayed in hotels with a day.

Absolutely. And every time I just look at it, like, what the fuck are you doing here? And whose ass have you been fire hydrining? Like, isn't that how it works? They just shoot water indiscriminately up towards a butthole. It's ridiculous to me. A little splash. You don't like badais?

No, dude. Because then what? What do you mean? Then what? Then you have a clean... Yeah, bro. Oh, so you don't even dry it off with toys. toilet paper, Cowboy Reed?

You just bidet yourself and throw your pants back on? No, you dried off a toilet paper, but it's after you wipe with toilet paper a couple times. Yeah, okay. I have a bidet in my house. It's sick. Oh, God, Cowboy Reed. So we got to talk about this.

Oh, my goodness. Cowboy Reed, dude. Do you realize that there is empirical, empirical data out there about if you leave your toilet open and you flush it and your toothbrush is like 17 feet away that your toothbrush gets what came out of the toilet? in some capacity. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, what happens when the bidet, and I'm sure they rate these things based on like pressure, and they're like, this bidet will really punch you in the butt hole with water.

And then what happens, the more expensive your bidet is the further those particles just spray all over the room. Have you ever thought about that? I don't think that makes sense. Okay.

I mean, I'm just saying if water hits your butt, it's not all going to just stay down in the toilet, dude. Do you really just sink down on that little motherfucker? Just hits, it washes off, you hit it with the toilet paper right after, and you're

cleaning, you're good to go. Okay. Are you really explaining to a grown man how to use a bidet? Well, no, I'm trying to because he's over here talking nonsense and I don't know. No, I'm just wondering does the bidet work like it sprays water up towards your butthole? Thank you, Kingston. Yes. Okay, Kingston's giving me a nod. So, so

you think that there's no residual like spores, bidet spores. that are just like aerosols that are just flying around the... You have increased... Yeah, but it'll be gone and clean before those things are able to do. But don't they hit the back of your calf or the back of your khakis that you like to wear? You wear your khakis.

What do you take them off and fold them and put them next to the sink? No. When you go to the bathroom and does stuff hit the back of your ankles and your calves and your khakis? No. Not as violently as it does when I'm getting a fire hydrant up my... in the crack of my ass. Damn, cowboy. This is crazy, dude.

You really got to sell me on this because I, maybe I'm, maybe I'm just dead wrong. Yeah, but days are something else. They are something else. We just have, we have an attachment you put on your toilet. So you sit on the same spot and it just,

it has a little knob on the side and you can crank it how high you want to crane. You have to set it right. Soldier boy. Exactly. Hey, Cowboy, If there's anybody I trust, it's you. Okay? If there's anybody I trust about this big, you, you last week, man, you, you, you saved my life sending me to that festival.

So it's only right that I try a bidet. Okay. I'm going to go in somebody else's house and I'm going to try it. I'm sure Macon has a bidet or he could probably show you that. Exactly. Oh, I'm going to get in there and use Macon's bidet. Here's the thing about making. He doesn't listen to this podcast.

I'm going to go through the back door, okay, the one by the kitchen. Love is love making. Love is love. And a sad, sad, sad, sad, bit of news on the way out. Michael K. Williams found dead in his apartment in New York City. Cowboy was like, he was talking about Bordwalk Empire, and I forgot about that role. But like, for me, it's like always going to be Omar. It's always going to be Omar.

Like, Omar was one of the best characters. in television history when you remember the wire i don't think the show was quite the same after he died in my opinion no i don't think that i think i think i think the way he dies in the show it does it just kind of like i didn't like the marlo stanfield storyline and all that stuff but oh okay i got i just wasn't as into it after that that was to me the prime of the show yeah the show was great no for all the way until mcnulty started like losing his shit and then i was totally out but it's still Even with that really kind of questionable finish, one of the best shows of all time.

One of the best shows of all time. Like look how it survived that. Game of Thrones can't fucking recover from that last season, okay? The wire, a lot of people forget how zany that was, but Omar was, if you had to think about favorite characters on the wire, he might be the one. He might be the one.

And this guy seemed like a really cool. Yeah, legend. legendary character for for a predominantly like black show to highlight something for really the LGBTQ community with him being gay and him still being kind of a gangster and robbing the toughest guys and the toughest guys of the show kind of being scared and and or careful around him it the the storyline of it for someone. anyone, just like you were saying. That definitely flipped for a lot of people.

It changes a lot of people's mind. And it, for me, like watching it, it was just like, yo, just like you said, he immediately becomes one of your favorite characters, a dude who was true to himself, but also was just as gangster as everyone else in the show, if not more. And so rest in peace to Michael Kay. And, um, been a rough two years with, uh, celebrity. and our favorite actors and stuff. But that's a bummer.

Thanks for telling us, Cowboy. Everybody have a terrific Tuesday. We will catch you all Thursday with a big football show. A lot of predictions that we'll hold ourselves too. And I guess we'll come up with the Waffle House final ruling. It sounded like we were leaning Waffle House because Macon's afraid of long John Silver's.

we'll talk about that on on friday y'all take care hey just a reminder here we're trying to run a business we're trying to be successful please follow chalk network on twitter and instagram and chalk media on youtube for more content from the green light podcast with yours truly chris long thank you kindly