Green Light with Chris Long - Mark Sanchez on Darnold, Wentz, and Lamar; NFL Playoff Sleepers & Mailbag.

Episode Date: November 13, 2020

(1:24) - Welcome, NFL Minority Hiring, and NYJ Cameras. (17:38) - Mark Sanchez on Sam Darnold, Lamar vs Kyler, and NFL Playoff Sleepers. (1:08:44) - Mailbag: Pasta Band Names, US President to Smoke With, and Which Movie World to Live In. Sign up for your DraftKings account at https://www.draftkings.com/sportsbook and use promo code : Greenlight Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Thursday night time machine. You're down 5 to 1 and Thursday nights don't even last until week 17 so you better get going in a hurry. When do they stop? I think week 15. Fuck, dude. I motioned to have a recount

based on the fact that I didn't know there were 17 weeks of Thursday night football. I don't know how I could forget that. But I want to count it up again. You say it's 5 to 1? It is. I want a hand count. Okay.

I'll get top people on that. Here I go. Thursday night, Titans, Colts. I got a score of 27, 23. Oh my God. And I got the Tennessee Titans. Beautiful. I have a score of 26, 23 in favor of the Indianapolis Colt.

Congratulations, you won. Congratulations, you won. Oh, this is easy fucking money. Let's go. Darius Leonard, let's do it, dog. I've got making. here with me. Hello! And we got Squanch coming on a little bit later. Talk some football.

Love Squanch. Y'all don't know Squantch as well as us. So let me tell you who Squantch is. That's Mark Sanchez, aka Baby Alien. He won a Heisman trophy winner. He won a Hizman, right? Or did I just make that up? All those SC quarterbacks did. Yeah, sure. Sure. AFC title dude, Squanch. And he actually gave me a lean on where Sam Darnold might be headed next year. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, we might make that into a social.

Heisman trophy winner Squatch thinks Sam Darnold's going to redacted because it's the open. Stick around for Mark Sanchez's takes. I'm gonna let down to report that Mark Sanchez did not win a Heisman trophy. Oh my God. When he was in school, Reggie Bush. You think you know a guy. vacated, so nobody really want it. Troy Smith, Tim

Tebow, and Samuel the Ramiel Bradford. I want to recount. Can you imagine how awesome your life has been if one of your biggest regrets is that you didn't win the Heisman? Right. Like, that's the one that got away. That's the, I've said it once

I'll say it again. Coolest thing about you ever is that you finish in the top ten of Heisman voting. Probably that's Sam the Ramier. No? 7. Oh, right. That wouldn't make any sense. The Tim Tebow year.

Yeah, I got a vote or two. Who on earth gave you a first place vote, though? I don't know. That's what I'm just totally uncomfortable with. One first place vote, two second place votes, 10 third place votes. That's a total of 17 points. And you finish 10th, which is awesome.

But, ooh, first? Yeah, dude, that's a, that's an oof. Tim Tebow, Darren McFadden, Colt, Brinnan, Chase Daniel, Dennis Dixon, Pat White, Matt Ryan, Kevin Smith, Glenn Dorsey, and C. Long for the 2007 Heisman Trophy voting. Yeah, whoever voted me first. Do I have like an ex-girlfriend that's a Heisman voter? I wonder if we can see who, probably not. Anyways, one football order of business I didn't get to talk about on Wednesday is the

the resolution that the owners passed this week, which basically further incentivizes more minority hiring at the head coach and GM levels. Essentially, if Eric B. Annamy gets hired this year, Andy Reid and the Ken City Chiefs get two third-round picks this next year, the year after. We all know like it hasn't been good enough. I mean, that's, if you can't acknowledge that, it's like you're not even worth talking to about this. I mean, there's four coaches of color in the league right now and two GM dudes, Barry and Greer, but Tomlin, Flores, Rivera, and Lynn.

That's it, of all the positions that are open in a league that's predominantly black. It's not good enough. But I don't, like, we had Jim Trotter on in May, and Jim Trotter is really on point with this stuff and understands like what's going to be. on in front offices and at the ownership level. And the feedback I was getting was like some coaches,

minority coaches were like not real crazy about this because it kind of like commodifies coaches even further. And it also acknowledges that like there's a fucking problem if we have to dangle two thirds in front of a coach's face to let their minority coordinator go higher to be a head coach. So you're getting two third round picks, right? And my worry besides the fact that like, holy shit, like they really do have to do this

and they're acknowledging in broad daylight that there's a real need to have to do this. So here's one of the big issues. And I'm not, I'm just nitpicking like hypotheticals, just taking you into like the thought process of a team. If you're the LA Chargers, as you mentioned right before we got on the pod, like they could be looking to hire a new coach next year.

Eric B. Enemy is awesome. He's, he probably would be a great fit. Any offense would be lucky to have him, you know, pulling the strings from the big office. But like, if you have two candidates that are relatively equal, Eric being one, you might pass on Eric because you don't want to give two third round picks to the top dog in the division. The two picks are a reward, right? They don't go from the chargers to the chiefs. The chiefs just get the picks, extra picks. Yeah. So like if you're L.A., if you're going to hire him, then the chiefs get the pitch. so you don't want to give two third rounders to. And the third round ain't the seventh.

No, it's not. I mean, you know, like in one sense, you're looking up at them, so you have to do something fundamentally to change, you know, the course of your franchise. To me, Eric B. Enemy is worth a bunch of picks, you know what I mean? Like, if we're doing this thing, you know,

which sucks that we're doing it. Another thing is, like, I worry that you end up, like, people who are actually, actively suppressing the hiring of black coaches in the NFL. And there are obviously some active forces. Some people might be complicit, like just without knowing it. Some people might be actively suppressing it. Well, we're living in America in 2020,

which we once thought meant something different than what it does now. Exactly. So I'm just saying that if you're that type of person, are two third round picks going to be the thing that, you know, that pushes you over the edge? Is that going to be enough for you? And all you're really doing is rewarding coaches that are in organizations

that are doing the right thing, probably anyways, right? You're going to do what you're going to do is what I mean to say. Like you're just, I don't think two-thirds is going to change anything unless you're that team that's like, fuck, I don't want to give that team

two third-round picks. Like, they're right in my division. But if you are the Chargers and you're taken B-enemy away from Patrick Mahomes, you might think that comes out in the wash if the chiefs get two more weapons. That's a great point. That's a great point.

I mean, it depends on the situation, I guess. I would probably, if I were them, hire them in a heartbeat, even if there was another great coach. But I'm worried about like, yeah, you know what? Your point's actually probably better than my point, because I think it actually, it outweighs the picks. Yeah, you're kind of wrecking their shit. Because, like, what happens?

I think Patrick Mahomes is transcendent enough to thrive in any offense, Andy Reid is no dummy. Andy's the guy. Right. I mean, that's an interesting point. Now the problem is this would come at the expense of Anthony Lynn, one of our four, but results matter. Yeah. And that team has had problems from the sideline this year, now two and six.

Yeah. And again, I'm not saying anybody should get fired, but that's a hypothetical that would illustrate within a division where that might get interesting. So, gosh, at least they're doing something to acknowledge it. It sucks that they have to. And I worry that it won't do much. Not because they're not trying. I think they have to improve the pipeline.

We've talked about this. The young white dudes are getting the end quicker at the lowest level. It's just the barrier is not as big. So if they improve the pipeline, I think that's the way to attack it. This top level stuff's great. It looks good and whatever, but I don't think they're going to solve it by just teetering with the top level decision making.

Also, that Jets thing. So they had cameras in their smoke detectors. And that was investigated. 2008, I guess they went in when there was theft in their locker room. Now, you might be asking, hold on, rich NFL players steal shit

fuck yeah they do which is just ridiculous I mean it is ridiculous to be a thief but to be a thief in the NFL what I cannot imagine making that decision and I've been in two three locker rooms

where there were instances of theft like for a couple hundred dollars because you know guys gamble and whatnot and you know guys will go to the casino after after practice this or something if they live near one. Guys carry a little cash. I've seen people get like bags stolen and shit.

Like I can't believe it. Anyways, the cameras go in and I guess they just sit there. And the only reason they're there is for that and they see them every once in a while on a loop. But I was just troubled thinking about that. Like cameras in an NFL locker room, like the first thing that I read most people buzzing about online was that's gotta be the Patriots.

There's gotta be some, competitive advantage. That's got to be that. I'm like, what about the dicks, man? What about the fact that a bunch of dudes are getting looked at naked and they have no idea? Like, can we just fucking be a little more sensitive to, I get, because I get this ran in me about the media and open locker room time. Okay. I am not somebody who really cares like about disrobing. You know, like, I'll just disrobe, okay? There, there would be a, Grum of reporters in front of you and you would drop the towel. Well, no, but like if I'm getting changed and they all rush in at the same time, this is

the way it works. Like open locker room starts after practice, like 10, 15 minutes after practice. So after practice, you have like an hour from then to meetings. And a lot of times you have to get a lift in, eat your lunch because you're exhausted and get changed and showered and maybe get treatment too. So you have an hour for this. Well, the reporters are trying to talk to you while you're trying to talk to you while you're trying to do at least two of those things in the locker room,

which is fine. They got a job to do. The schedule sucks, but you're inevitably naked in front of strangers, dude. Like, and what I'm saying is I'm not offended by like that, but there, maybe what if a dude is like, I don't wanna be seen after practice with my dick out, dude? Seems to be a simple scheduling fix. I don't, they, no one's figured it out.

You know why they do this? I'm picturing you with a, lunchables. Why? I don't know. You just, you said you had to fit lunch in and you just out your locker with little luncheables. No, you go into the cafeteria, but lunchebles are pretty good. Yeah. The pizza ones are good. Yeah. You go through so much trouble to make that pizza. It's well worth it. I might get some luncheables. They should just grubhub luncheals. I might do that later. Back to the open locker room thing. I just think, and I've always said this, I actually said to a reporter once, male dominated sports

is like the only place you're expected to be naked in front of strangers in the United States. That's it. Think of another place. You could be somebody that opts into being naked and I guess by signing our CBA we're kind of opting into that but it's still pretty fucking ridiculous. Is it

not on its head? Very much so. Give me a day I could fix this in five minutes. They have... Give me a calendar done. They haven't fixed it, dude. They haven't fixed it. And the reason, supposedly, that they flood at the same time. And again, I respect beat writers and all these people.

They're the hardest working people in sports. And I hope you know, if you're listening, you're like a local media person who's there pounding on the pavement every day. And I've talked to you guys about this. It's not about me disrespecting your craft. I'm just saying, like, there might be a better time than when, like, everybody's just dropped trial. So the ridiculousness of that standard,

it's not even a double standard. I don't know what it is. Like there's nowhere else in society that we're expected to be. That blew my mind when the Jets thing came up and people were like, oh, the Pats are spy and not like everybody basically got peep hold. Yeah. Footage might exist somewhere of your unit when you didn't want that. But I do feel like there's this kind of callousness.

I'm sure some people are listening right now. like get off your fucking soapbox. I just think it's weird. There does seem to be some, some deviousness. I mean, if you're trying to curb theft, why not just a big old camera on the wall? But we're hiding them in smoke detectors?

That's weird, dude. Yeah. But evidently a Jets player said they know what it was and they weren't worried about it. All righty. But there's got to be a way, man. And when I said this to a reporter once, he was like, you guys will be fine.

You guys are fine, right? You guys are fine? Are you serious? I was like, I'm not serious, but what if I was? What if I really was annoyed at that? Like, I don't know, man. Just be a little bit less callous towards us, guys. We're not pieces of meat.

You know what I'm saying? I got a fix. Slap an honor code on the side of a wall. Meaning? No more theft. I'm not talking to. about that. I know you're not. I know you're not. I was back to the stealing. Got it. The reason that reporters come in supposedly is because they want you to be still pissed off

from the game or, you know, if you have 30 minutes to catch your breath, an hour to catch your breath and then you put your suit on and go out there. Supposedly, the reason is that, you know, and it's true, you get the most honest and raw reactions. But how many like, think about this, in the last year or two, How many honest and raw, like newsworthy, noteworthy reactions did you get on camera? After a game or after practice. How many do you remember? Exactly. I don't know if I remember any like notable outburst after practice or something where I felt like I gleaned a lot.

I mean, the sound bites, yeah. But again, why are their cameras in the locker room after? Bring a fucking tape recorder. You know, like I just don't get it, make. I don't get it. I'm with you. I'm with you. I, you know, single families, you know, after one doesn't get sold.

I don't, I don't have people in my car being like what happened there. Why? Well, now imagine that your, your sack is on the front of your, your, your, uh, cloth seats. Just, just, just this. And somebody's asking you a question and your sack is on, it's like right there. I've seen dudes get damn near knocked over by like throngs of reporters and they're not even the dudes that the reporters want to go talk to. They're always the dudes next to the locker of the dude. Like it's so fucking annoying and they just box you out and you're like, uh, excuse me.

Like that's my naked ass dude. Like you just hit me with your camera. Yeah, it sucks. I've got leather seats. Okay. That's good. Without further ado, let's get squanched on the line. Download the top rated Draft King Sportsbook app now and use promo code Greenlight.

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this thing mark sances won the heisman you heard it here so i'm introing him as hysman trophy winner mark sancho and mark is going to talk to us about some quarterbacks carson wence making's favorite subject as well as lamar jackson and we'll talk about uh the most dangerous fringy teams as well as the biggest flaws for some of the best. And as I mentioned earlier, he has a Sam Darnold take that we might make into a social. It's that good. All right. Mark Sanchez is joining us as we talked about earlier.

I hope to have him a lot more on pod number three of our football weeks going forward. Mark, the first question out of the gate here is an icebreaker. Where do the Jets get their first win, dude? Who do they got coming up? I'll name the schedule for you. Chargers, Dolphins, Raiders, Seahawks,

Rams, Browns, Patriots. Depending on what happens to the Patriots, maybe it's like the last week of the season kind of thing. But the way the Chargers are playing, golly. They like to lose games. Yeah,

and they like to lose them at the end of the game, right? They just get these. amazing leads and then just blow it. And I feel so bad for for Herbert, you know, he's playing so well. He's, um, it could be the Chargers, man. It could be this, this coming game against the Chargers. Damn, dude.

But don't hold your breath. No, I won't hold my breath. I definitely won't hold my breath. Uh, by the way, they got to buy this weekend, which is nice because they would have absolutely gotten obliterated with Masters coverage in New York and that sort of thing. I don't think anybody's going to be watching. Like if they had played this weekend and the Masters were on,

on, they were absolutely fucked. Listen, I think the Patriots are a nice bet for them to pick up their first win, but by week 17, they're going to be staring down the barrel of the first pick even more than they are now. So, like, I don't know if the Jags pick up another win or what, and you get some cushion. I think they could beat the Pats. I just, that would piss Bill Belichick off so bad, dude. He hates the jets.

So I feel like, right, organizations tank, the players aren't going to take. the guys that are on the field are going to be trying to win. So you can only control so much, right? When they say tank for Tua and all that, well, the dolphins were still trying to play well. So, you know, that would be interesting if the strategy from Belichick was like, all right, all right, guys. Let's just remember on defense when we like let them score at the end of the game

so we can get the ball back, let's just do that like five times. All the time. All the time. Because we don't want, because we don't want like Trevor Lawrence or somebody in the division. Like we don't have a quarterback really currently. I mean, you know, Cam's not the long-term answer there. That seemed, I mean, I'm pulling for Cam. He looked better this past week.

You really did. But it's the Jets. So we'll see how that works out. If Darnold's on the move, do you like him somewhere? Because I like the kid, and I think he did. No one. Sam Fran. Sam Fran.

I'd love to see him in Sam Fran. I'd love to see him. Who else did I say? I said potentially, yes, Indy, that was ill. Indy would be nice. Frank and him, that'd be nice. Yeah, that would be. Both West Coast systems, you know, great for his mobility and making plays outside the pocket.

I think he'd do great with Shanahan, too. He's a West Coast guy. Yeah. And you saw what they did with Matt Ryan. I think Darnold has some of that skill set that Matt Ryan has, but he's a little more elusive. and he's not going to run around like Lamar Jackson and maybe even Patrick Mahomes or something like that, but he can move enough to keep defenses on their toes, keep plays alive for an extra second, second and a half. And you know how it works in coverage, guys break down and he can make you pay.

So I just think he needs a chance to win, to remember what it's like to win and get a little confidence back because he's just been beat down there. And that's the rescue run when you draft a young quarterback and don't help him. and provide, you know, weapons for them. You know, that's the most exciting thing for me about the future of, like, free agency and quarterback mobility is now it feels like any first round pick quarterback,

no matter how high you were picked, it gets proven over and over again that your seat is always hot. So, like, there's going to be always an influx of, or in the past, you rode that out for five years and you just tried to make it work. Like now, guys are on the move, so there will always be a chance

for your shitty team to get good the next year. You know, like, there'll always be a chance. Like, if you think Jimmy G leaves something to be desired in Sam Fran, which I do, like, there'll always be a chance that somebody's coming to the rescue. Indy, like, usually I'd be like, man, what are we doing with this Philip Rivers marriage? It's a one-year thing, and it's probably not going to get you a trophy. There's still going to be an opportunity for like, hey, who knows what happens with Dak? Who knows what happens with Sam Darnel?

Who knows what happens with any of these quarterbacks? So I think it's an exciting time with that mobility. And the other thing, too, is for Sam, if you look at his contract, he's going to make a little more than backup money next year. He's going to make somewhere around $4.5.5 million, right? So that's, you know, a good price for backup money. He can go somewhere where they still have a quarterback. Learn. You can have, you know, two legit guys.

If he goes to Sam Fran, they don't have to get rid of Jimmy. They could just pick up Sam and not extend his option for his fifth year. because then he, if you exercise the option for his fifth year, he's going to get like $26 million. Right. Which right now he hasn't proven to be worth that because his team sucks. So you're like, okay, let's just take this fourth year, see what happens. Pam is $4.5 million. And then he's on a one-year prove-it deal.

So both sides are incentivized to make him play well. That's a great point. That's a really great point. Carson left. I know you are here. He's mad, dude. This is why we have. Quarterback stuff, I always feel like when I talk about quarterbacks, I'm like so careful.

You know, like if you were breaking down DeLyman, there would always be a part of you that would be like, yeah. Do I really mean what I'm saying? Do I know what I'm saying? Yeah. It's squanch. Squant, it's squantz, dude. I need to add like accents and like the bar and the two little thingies. That's a mass.

The squancher. We got the squancher here with all things quarterbacks. Hey, quarterbacks. I can't be, I got to be a real one, as they say. I got to talk about, you know, guys I like, and I got to be negative when it's appropriate. And Carson Wentz, right now the negativity is probably warranted. No, it's not probably warranted.

It's warranted. The comments post game last week, I don't know if you saw those. Against the Giants? Yeah, or the Cowboys. They were the Cowboys Giants. Oh, that too. It's all the fucking same. Yeah.

He kind of was dismissive of the mistakes he's making, and he kind of said, like, something effective. well that's always going to be the way I am. You know, like I get that, but there's a time to say, mea culpa. Like, this is my fault. And yes, I know that being a gunslinger and being baldsy has got me to this point. But in front of my locker after three turnovers or whatever it was against Dallas,

the basement dwellers of the NFL right now, like, I don't go there. I just say I'm going to fix it. If you see comments like that, and he did, to be fair, walk it back a little bit this week. but I always believe the first thing you say. What does that tell you? Yeah, he, so I went back and watched the interview when he's on the field Thursday night against the Giants. He throws that last second like wheel route or option route.

So nice ball. To, oh, great ball. To Bostick, who's like this big. And, I mean, he puts it right on him, right? So he's riding high feeling good. And in my opinion, he gave up a lot of his personality. And we've seen it on tape, but he actually spoke to it, right? And so I wrote my handy little notes here.

But he says, it's always going to be an internal battle. And I'm going to deal with this my whole career because Michael Irvin asked him, when is it time to try and force a play or make a play downfield? And when is it time to kind of, you know, pack up and just say uncle, right? And so that was his response is, you know, it's an internal battle. Totally fair. right every quarterback deals with it some guys are a little better at discerning when to say uncle and some guys are a little worse at it okay but he just says i'm going to deal with it my whole career

like bro i am who i am i'm going to force it if i have to or if i think it's appropriate and that's the way it is right so i understand that mentality right but i also have had coaches say don't try make me chicken salad out of chicken shit. When the play's over, the play is over, okay? Throw the thing in the seven throw the stands and move on with your life. Gruden actually sat me down one time in an offseason

and we talked about it and he said, he said, hey man, you know what you're doing? You're throwing double slant in the cover two man. They have inside leverage. The fact that you are completing this ball is just has me an utter bewilderment.

Do you know what that means? I am dumbfounded because you have completed a ball against the coverage that is designed to stop that play. You are jamming sand up a Nat's ass. Okay. Do you know how small a Nat's ass is, man? And I was like... We would say tighter than a frog's asshole here in Virginia. So there are both very tight spaces.

You know, at a certain point, you've got to just... pack up and all right and he would say throw this ball away move on to the next down move on with your life you kind of make him sound you kind of make it's like a damn good impression

it really is and a lot of people take stabs it's so funny one time I was impersonating gruden in individual period because he was in town for Monday night football and he was right behind me I didn't realize it he got a kick out of it though he got a kick out of I did it I think he likes it

And I did it for him. This is a total sidebar, but we're on a Monday night game, and I would always do Gruden impressions just messing around. And then we're in the production meeting the night before in Miami. And somebody, either Lisa Salters or Tariko or somebody says, hey, I heard you do a good Gruden impression. And I just looked right at him, and I was like, not me. And they're like, come on, just do it.

And I was like, Coach Gruden, you understand that imitation is the highest form of flattery. Right? Like, that's the highest form of respect. Yeah, for sure. And he said, he's just looking at me like, go ahead. And I'm just like, shit. And I said, you know, what I like about Peyton Manning, man, he comes into town, adverse environment and just lays down the law, Jaws. That's why I call him the sheriff. And so he goes, hey, man, that was pretty good. You play your cards right tomorrow. You might be the deputy. No, no, you're not. I swear to God. I swear to God. Bro. He takes it in stride. He took it in stride with me. And listen, I, uh, I'm a huge Gruden fan.

And don't apologize for sidebars because this entire pot is a fucking sidebar generally. Here's the deal, man. Shield Capadia, who's, uh, a writer for the athletic and focuses on, you know, the Eagles and does great work. You know, he had a really good article that was very timely. We've been talking about doing this Carson thing for a day or two and this thing popped up yesterday. So I was like, great, let me see what he's talking about. I mean, he points out 35 games since the ACL, 17 and 17 and 1, and hasn't been the same guy. His completion rate over expectations way down if you're into the analytics, which Sheal is. He notes two big analytical differences.

He's worse under pressure, and he's actually throwing into less tight windows. That makes sense. First one makes a lot of sense to me. Okay, you can see it. He's 25% positive play when pressured, which is last. in the league, basically. In 2017, he was top five in making chicken salad out of chicken shit, right?

We had a lot of talent around us, etc. So the pressure's getting to him. It's getting to him on the field and it's getting to them figuratively. It's hard being Carson Wentz right now. It's part of the deal having a year like he had and playing quarterback in Philly. It's not just you know, like your cliche

folding under pressure. Like, I don't think he's folding under pressure. Folding, you think of a guy deer in the headlights. You think of a guy who's afraid to get hit. you know, a guy who's weak in the knees. Like, that's not this. This is somebody saying, okay, I'm under a tremendous amount of pressure. I'm going to just try to do what's gotten me here and do it harder.

You know what I mean? Like muscle through the pressure. And that's how pressure is affecting him, in my opinion. I think it looks like a guy right now who's forcing things who's saying, I've been this fucking guy my entire career and I'm going to keep being this guy and the pressure's making me lean into this more. And it's dumb. It's really dumb.

It doesn't make sense to me. There's a very fine line of you just, you know, waiver with the wind. Like you just get blown to and fro, right? You've got to be yourself. But at the same time, you got to be aware of your circumstances. When you don't have those kind of players around you,

your game has to change just a little bit. And the elite quarterbacks can do that. Brady, Manning. How many guys have Aaron Rogers? How many guys have they make, you know, guys with lesser talent maybe, drafted later, you know, not as acclaimed. How many times have they made those guys look good?

And a lot of it isn't because they're, isn't because they're pressing. And right now, I think that's what it is. I think he's just pressing just a little bit. Like, all right, I'm going to show you. You guys don't know. Like, I can handle this, watch this. And it's a very dangerous road. It's very narrow and it's very rocky.

It's windy. It's dangerous because one slip and you're down the cliff, your three turnovers in the first half, and it looks like chicken shit, right? So it's a, you know, we're talking finally tuning something, okay? And it's a discernment and the ability to say no, the ability to say uncle and move on with these plays

and realize, especially when you're playing a divisional opponent in their division, their division's garbage. Yeah. So just win the game. Let's throw the people to throw the ball to the people that. play the are open yes if i have to uh you know expedite my read a little bit if i got to speed things up a little bit and just dump it to the back even though maybe goddard was like probably

going to be open but i know the back's open right here at three yards and goddard's like kind of probably going to be open at like 12 15 yards who cares yeah dump it to the back right and that is so hard to do it's so hard to do because i was like that in new york when all your talent leaves and you change coaching staffs and you're getting this just berated by the media, you're like, hey, well, screw you guys, watch this. And then you go start chucking the ball around.

You're like, whoa, I think I just threw four picks in about four possessions. Yeah, he's doing, you know, and this is what I'm trying to get at. He's not folding. He's doing the opposite of folding in a negative way. He's pressing, right? He's pressing under pressure.

And, you know, like, he's never been afraid to get hit. You know, in fact, his problem is he's fucking fearless. He's never been afraid to throw the, ball to people that are quasi open. And he's never been afraid to extend plays, but that's not working this this year. I mean, his time to for him, he's got it. He's got to like to and this is on his coaches. This is, uh, on the people talking to him and his internal, you know, monologue essentially,

right? If you're not talking to yourself, you're listening to yourself or listening to somebody else. So he's got to continue to talk to himself and remind himself, hey man, is this play extends? I get smarter with the football. I just get more intelligent with the football. My discernment gets even better. My decision making is more precise, the longer this play goes.

Right? So I'm the smartest if this play goes eight seconds. Right? Like, that's as smart as I can be. It's me chasing the board on a Sunday gambling. I mean, it's the same thing. It's like literally like, okay? Or the, the guys aren't open, you know?

Like it's not working out today. Just fucking put it in the seventh row, man. And his time to throw is higher than it's ever been, which is a problem because, you know, the blocking, while Stoutland's done a great job up front there to make, again, chicken salad with the group that he has. And nothing against those guys. They just aren't guys we've heard of. They're guys that were third-string guys. I mean, they've been starting third-string guys on both sides of the offensive line all year off and on. The continuity sucks, but they've done a good job.

I say that to say, you know, as his. clock goes up and he you know like the blocking has not been as bad as as as we thought it'd be and I think what he gets into trouble doing is he's not holding the ball because the blocking's great he's holding the ball because he's trying to make things happen and that's like a very clear that's a clear window into the way he's thinking I think is like the long I hold the ball I'll hit the big one you know last thing I'll say about it Sunday night when I'm down big like it's just not a good dude. Off track betting in the Himalayas.

Yeah, I got a lock for you this week. But yeah, so the last thing I'll say on it, and it's the same kind of, this will hit home with a lot of viewers, right? When you argue with your significant other, right, there is a point where you say uncle sometimes. Even when you might, might have the winning argument, sentence, just bam, like,

is it worth it? Is it worth it to say it? Is it worth it to make the throw and maybe throw the interception? In this case, in this season, under these circumstances, I'd recommend against it. Just dump it down, give it a nice. You know what, babe, you're right. I'm sorry.

I love you. All good. Instead of, hey, hold on. I'm going to start a fight here. I'm going to dig my heels in. What's up? It ain't worth it. I never do that.

ever in my personal life. Wife alert, which is what me and make can say when we're just checking to see if our wives are listening to this program, which they never are.

Here's the big deal to me, 2021. 2021 is going to be do or die. He's not getting bench this year. There's just as really, I mean, as bad as he's been at times, like, you know,

next year is the year where it's do or die. In my opinion, you get the pieces back around him and you give it one more shot because you, like, I'm just not hitching my wagon

to Jaylon Hertz with no information. Obviously, they know a lot more about Jalen Hertz than we do, having seen him in practice every day. How low do you have to see the bar get for Carson and them not put in Jalen Hertz to realize that maybe Jalen Hertz isn't the long-term answer? Could be. I don't know.

I don't want to be unfair to the kid. But you've also got a guy who's shown MVP talent, and, you know, you want to get that out of him. That's what's so tantalizing. I got to be careful with Lamar stands. So I made sure I talked about my favorite QB, in quotes here, before we got on to Lamar. My favorite QB is Justin Herbert.

So if you ever see me caping for him, that's exactly what it is. That's exactly what it is. Let me do this. Yeah, he's awesome. Let me do the disclaimer real quick. I love Lamar. I hope he's successful for 15 years in the league.

And I suspect if nothing changes, this is a perennial playoff team. I mean, they're going to be in it every year. But we've got to stop complaining about people actually analyzing Lamar's slump. Everybody does this thing where it's like, Well, you don't talk about this guy. You don't talk.

Lamar is the reigning MVP. He set the league on fucking fire. The ashes are still hot from last year. So when he's slumping, we have to talk about it. And all I'm doing is following the trends. This year, the production's down. Greg Roman's under fire.

And a year ago, my big worry was, okay, if Greg Roman leaves, you might see a dip in production. But now I'm being told that that would be good for Lamar. So everybody heard the rich eyes and comments where Lamar went on the show and said, people are calling out the plays,

etc. Mark, have you ever had people call out your plays? So there's tells for every team, right? And if you're a good coach, based on formation, motions, alignment,

all that kind of stuff, there are tells. It's been maybe once, you know, but we didn't have some sort of scheme that was like, you know, these rotating backs in the backfield,

you know, uh, uh, uh, uh, option and all that kind of stuff. It wasn't like this special thing. Okay. It was just a basic West Coast offense and we moved our pieces around the best we could. But when you hear these tells, like you know as a D-Lyman, heavy hand for an offensive lineman, white knuckles, like they're

coming off, they're firing off the ball. Light stands, back in his stance, you know, tackle has his hand up. Okay, it's good chance. It's going to be a pass. Those kind of things, you know, everybody picks up those tells. But when they're calling out specific plays, that is an issue. And to combat that as a coaching staff, you have to have sameness and likeness is what Shottie used to call it. But in your run game and past game, they have to look the same. You have to use some of the same motions.

And if you're going to toss sweep one way out of a motion to bunch formation, you've got to do the fake toss sweep reverse, you know, naked or have the toss sweep reverse to a to a receiver just to keep people honest or fake the toss sweep and now you're in a play action set up whatever it is figure it out but you have to marry up formations and motions in the run and run action play action and pass game or else you're sunk and that's everybody across the league but they're so specific in their run design i mean you watch them enough and this is this is the problem with everybody right people have to understand that one of these new guys who comes into the league and sets the league on fire like you talk about,

there are defensive coordinators who are paid for six days to study your ass, figure you out. Yeah. And when they see you on Sunday, they just ruin your life for an entire day. That's what they try and do. Okay. So that's their job. All off season, I guarantee you these defensive coordinators in Pittsburgh, you know, in Cleveland, everybody is just grinding on the tape.

Yeah, all hands on deck. We got to stop this. Here's the triple option. Okay, boom, got it. Here's their read option. Got it. Here's their signals from the tackle when he's going to, you know, bypass the end and let Lamar read him.

Got it. Boom. There's our run tell. There's our run tell. So, I mean, at some point, that's going to happen. Now you just have to counter some of that stuff with your, with your preparation and your strategy going into the game. Yeah, and that's the hard part this year for them.

And I'm not making excuses for Lamar or Greg Roman because this is the way the league is, as you mentioned. They're still scoring what? Yeah, I mean, like, 20 points. They're scoring 20 points a game, and they're averaging, that's 31 weeks in a row. Yeah. They're scoring 20 points a game. And they're averaging 170 rush yards per game. Yeah, I mean, like, stuff is working.

It's just like, it's just if you wanted to work as well as last year, you're going to have to make some adjustments. And that includes, you know, it's Greg and it's Lamar in the way Lamar wants to play the game because, like, scheme was not some of the stuff I saw against the Steelers. Okay. You know, there were some scheme elements there, but you ran the ball for 300 yards. There were some decisions that were really. poor with the football. And then last week

you talked about that 20 streak. I think what's troubling is they needed a defensive touchdown to get to that 20 last week and you're looking at it. I think the big deal is when you talk to guys that played for Greg Roman anywhere he's been successful. They've had

really good guys up front. San Francisco Alex Boone Anthony Davis, Joe Staley, Goodwin was the center and I'm forgetting, I you potty? It was like a Goose Squad dude and they just ran gap scheme shit and they ran down your shit. And you could call out a counter because I could see one of those fat asses back off the

ball. Yeah, but then go stop it. But then stop it, right? That's the hard part. And I think they still have, it's still always going to be hard to stop, even if they're predictable. But, you know, another thing is they lose yonda this year. I mean, they had guys in Buffalo.

Greg Roman had guys in Buffalo that were studs up front. They lose Yonda this year. They lose Stanley. It's going to be an adjustment. And then also, you know, when you talk to players, you know, that played for him. It seemed like he might have had a little bit of a shelf life, Greg, because in San Francisco, he admittedly, it seemed like, got cute his third year there.

And then in Buffalo, let's not forget, your boy, Rex, fired him two games into the season. So, I mean, like, it's not like he's been perfect everywhere. I just think that if we're going to go with the, this is way more noticeable than any other teams tells, I'm not just going to go off of Alex Highsmith from the Steelers saying, quote, I knew when that play started, they were coming back to that because they ran the same play in the first half

and I didn't drop deep enough. So I learned from that play and just dropped deeper, and the ball just fell into my hands. That's every game. All the fucking time, dude. So what we're saying is, there may be something to it, but I don't want to hear that, oh, well, the Bengals safety said that you know, Lamar Jackson only wants to throw the ball

to Hollywood Brown and Andrews. Like, okay. Like, yeah, of course. like let's get granular if you want to say that the tells are there and i agree with you you know with roman's history and a little bit of the you know it's not a gimmick but lamar's lamar's excellence last year just needs to be fine-tuned if you want to be good going forward so we'll see how they do with i agree and bottom line is if he's going to be if he's going to take the next step it's got to be as a pocket passer and the teams that have caused problems for them are the teams that can force him to go through, you know, 10 to 12 play drives, convert two to three third

downs, you know, third and mediums consecutively in one drive where he's going to have to drop back, read a defense, go through a progression, and get the ball accurately thrown in tight coverage. Right. The more times you force a quarterback to do that, I don't care if it's Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, or Aaron Rogers, or Drew Brees. The more times you force a quarterback to do that, the better your chances are of being successful on defense because it is mentally draining. It is exhausting to do that over and over and over.

You're going to make a mistake at some point. Now, some quarterbacks can do it for an awful lot longer time than others because they're used to it. Lamar Jackson doesn't have the reps at doing that. They're doing a lot of gimmicky option stuff, all that reads, zone read. That is not exercising his dropback passing muscles, right? That's just different. It's a different mental process and he's just got to get better at it.

And let's face it, in the NFL, when you get to the playoffs, you are forced to do that just because the teams are so good at least 10 to 15 times, like pure dropback, no bullshit, no RPO's, no play action, quick game, like legitimate five-step or seven-step drop-back. Those kind of timing plays downfield where you go through a progression. You've got to do it 10 to 15 times in a real, legit playoff. off game. So if you force the quarterback to do that during the year, if you get them closer to the 15 number, you're going to have more success on defense, most likely, you know, unless you're just facing Peyton Manning. Now you're just hoping for a mistake. But, you know, at a certain point,

he's got to make that jump. And I don't know if this system is going to give him a chance to make that jump. Yeah, that's the tough part, because if you go away from this system, then do you abandon what's made them so scary? And it's kind of like an adjustment period where, you know, Lamar could take a lump or two for a year or two. I mean, like trying to adjust to a total, because Greg's system, as much as it's unlocked, Lamar's potential of being dangerous and scary, has, you know,

given him a ceiling. Now, can he break through that ceiling? Maybe we won't know until DeCosta says, okay, absolutely, we're going all in on weaponry on the outsides and we're changing our O.C. There's a reason. We slurp DeCosta all the time and the Ravens

personnel with, oh God, they've done such a great job. But then we don't trust them offensively because they haven't brought weapons in for Lamar. Well, maybe there's a reason right now because it would be a waste in that offense. You know, like we're just not going to do those type of things. So I guess I would ask you, and this is kind of on the spot, but is there a coordinator that you think like Lamar could work really well with, like around the league? Andy Reid. Yeah.

Good luck getting him. Yeah. I mean, maybe maybe be enemy, somebody like that. but, you know, they've just done a great job. And they're different. Him and Mahomes are different. They both move around, but they're different. Mahomes is his arm talent and his ability to read defenses.

Plus, he sat behind, you know, Alex Smith that first year. So we really learned how to take care of the football. And if anything, you know, tighten his game up to where he wasn't giving the ball away because he did give the ball away a lot in college. So, but I do think that kind of West Coast system, I know Roman has a lot of those staples in his system. Gosh, I'm trying to think, maybe even somebody like Schottenheimer, what he's done with Russ Wilson, that could help him. But essentially where you, you know, you let him be himself, but within the confines of your system.

Passing framework. Yeah, at least go through these reads and checks. And then if that doesn't work, then, yeah, dude, you're on your own, make a good decision for it. and we'll see you next down kind of thing. As a side note, going back to Philly for a quarter second, one thing that She'll pointed out was the play action past game has been atrocious. You mentioned play action and screens and things like that that, that can help out a lot.

Last year, the Eagles were great with their screens. I mean, really great. They're last in the league right now. So there is a schematic issue there in Philly as well. I don't want to put it all on Carson, the personnel and all that. But, you know, both these guys are going through some growing pains. Carson's are way worse than Lamar's. And he has less leeway and he's a little bit older.

But, you know, it's going to be two interesting situations to monitor in 2021, really, because these teams are who they are and these guys who they are this year, unless Carson wakes up one morning and he stops living dangerously. Most dangerous sleepers. Let's talk about that. Because the Eagles are definitely a sleeper. They're just, you don't have a choice but to put them in probably if they win the division. So I would ask you maybe give me one.

one out of each, each conference? The way the Dolphins defense is playing right now in the NFC East, they could mess some teams up and ruin some playoff hopes for some teams. I just, if they're going to score on defense like that and Tua can play like he did in Arizona, take care of the football and continue to improve, this is a team that can mess around and send somebody home in the playoffs as a wildcard bid. I mean, shit, they just beat the Cardinals who might be the scariest team at this point if we're being overreactive and all this stuff in the NFC West. I mean, by the way, Kyler Murray, would you, if you were starting your franchise right now, are you taking Kyler or Lamar?

Ryan Clark got like bombarded over saying this and I agree with him. I'd take Kyler. Really? I would. Yeah, I mean, he does so much, dude. the way they're designing their runs for him. I mean, at a certain point, we're going to be talking about the same conversation, market now, that teams are going to kind of figure some of these things out on these design

runs where he's actually like, it looks like zone read, but he's not really given the ball to the halfback. The halfback's going up and blocking a second level defender, like a linebacker or safety in the box. It's a designed run, even though it looks, it's a design quarterback run, even though it looks like, oh, he's reading it. Some of that stuff that they're doing is pretty unique, but at the same point, like somebody's going to get a beat on it.

All right, we got these guys. Here's the tell. Kyler's a, like, the ball coming off his hand is just like right now. Like right now, that ball is like, he throws a ball like only a couple guys in the league. Now he's got to work on some things, no doubt about it. And there could be a catch-up period schematically. But I just feel like he scares me just as much as a D-Lyman in a passing, offense with his legs as Lamar would.

But to put Kingsbury in Baltimore, like to use that system in Baltimore, one, it's very un-Baltimore. Like Baltimore has to run the ball, right? To be Baltimore. They got to beat you up while they run up the score. Okay. It's also cold like you're outside in the desert. You're in the dome.

Like it's nice and warm. Yeah. That offense kind of fits there. You know, if they got to go. you know, on the road and play somebody in a cold weather. Like, I don't know if that works that well for Kyler. I think we'll find out this year. I really think they're going to be in and they're going to be dangerous.

Yeah, because they would essentially, you can't really call them a sleeper anymore because they're on the map. But it looks like, you know, the Seahawks would be number one, even though they lost the Cardinals. And then the Cardinals would be number two in that division. So they could sneak in there and screw somebody up. Or they could sneak in there and make a run. you went dolphins in the AFC, I'll go to the Raiders. Only three more teams on their schedule

winning records. And that includes the dolphins, to your point, who's classified as a sleeper. I don't think anybody's that afraid of the Colts offensively, but they're a good football team. And then the third winning record team that they have left, they've already beaten in the Chiefs. And I don't want to say that dismissively.

If they can get the Trump Brown thing rolling again and you just don't sleep on them because of the bucks win. Okay, the bucks were really rolling that two, three week period. You know, I don't want to sleep on them because of that. I'll go Raiders in the AFC and then the NFC. The Vikings.

You like the Vikings? Well, no, I'm giving you a deep, deep sleeper. This is like a depths of the deepest depths of the deep sleepers. So it's them and the bears, right? Like the Packers will potentially win the division, even though they just lost the Vikings. but the pack will win the division and it's them or the bears

it's this is if they get in Mark if they get in if they get in they're going to be dangerous because if they get in and of course this is kind of unfair the way I've rigged this but they've already beaten the Packers and they took the Hawks the distance okay here's who they have left the Bears Cowboys Panthers Jags Bucks Bears Saints lion lions okay so they have the Saints and the Bucks everybody else is pretty

beatable for them and they could steal one. I mean, like, they're scary because Dalvin Cook's scary, right? And if Kirk gets a little bit, like the run game gets going, he gets confident, like, you just never know. He could have a hot game. It would take probably six and two, but anything's possible. And if Dalvin Cook slides in in January, that's, that's scary. The question is the whole is the hole too big there for them. But if they slid in, I would be afraid of that team. Give me the rest of their schedule. I saw You said Dallas on there, so that's a win. Who else?

They're favored against the Bears coming up this week. Dallas are going to be favored. They'll probably be favored against the Panthers without CMC if he's not back. The Jags, they're going to be favored. The bucks, they'll be dogs. The bears, I mean, depending upon what happens the next month, they could be favored there. The Saints, they'll probably be dogs. And the Lions, they'll probably be favored.

Who do you have in the NFC? Oh, geez. Let's go, well, the Panthers are pretty much out of it, right? I mean, they'd have to have one hell of a second half of. the season. Let me think here. I mean, the Eagles are going to win the division. Does anybody else get in with them? I think they could win a playoff game. I think they could win a playoff game because somebody would underestimate them because of their division. And I mean, they're going to barely scrape by. And also, don't forget, like, Ertz is coming back. Goddard's coming back.

They got some players, you know, that are trending in the right direction health-wise. and we're talking, yeah, Deshawn's huge for him, even if he's not the most productive version of himself, at least he's a threat. Yeah. And, you know, you got to count for him because he'll blow the top off the defense and score deep touchdown. But essentially, it's going to come back down to what we said with Carson. Like, can he be conservative enough or have the discernment on the run and on the move when he

extends plays? And if he can do that and they win the turnover battle. they're going to be in these football games at least, right? They'll be right there. So as long as they don't beat themselves, they have a shot. Let's go real quick through the best teams in the league and a quick weakness. I'll start with the Steelers. Yeah.

I think it's the inability to push the ball downfield. I think they have the ability, but I think Ben, his health is so paramount to them that they've said this year, he's always been the guy, and you know this from watching quarterbacks, is like, if you're a D-Lyman and I'm playing Big Ben, I'm like salivating because he's going to hold on in the football, right? Like, you know, those are free sacks. This year he's not that guy. He's getting the fucking rock out.

And I wonder if that's just to keep him healthy. But also there's no AB and there's no Mike Wallace. So I don't know. With the Steelers, that big playability kind of scares me. Yeah, but what about Claypool, dude? Claypool's a baller. He's chucking a downfield to him.

They got Washington. They got Juju. Why haven't they been able to create big plays then? Well, they have. Claypool's had some big plays for him. It's just I feel like last year or last week, everybody got so, you know, like they're looking for the reason why the Steelers are going to be bad, right? Like there's no way they can be eight, no, let's find out why.

And, you know, he missed on a bunch of deep passes. Like if you hit 25% of your deep passes, you're doing fine on balls over 20 yards. Like, bro, you're kicking ass. That's better than anybody. So he's, listen, he just went through a little rut on some of those deep passes. Like, so what? That was one game. I just feel like they're so good on defense.

They have enough talent at receiver. They run the ball just fine. I mean, they're going to be, they usually they come on late too, right? Like they have a solid season. They have a couple losses here and there. But they just come on as gangbusters in the playoffs. And they know what to do because it's a culture thing. It's an attitude thing.

It's a Mike Tomlin thing and an organizational thing. They just know how to act when it comes time, when it gets cold, when you got to go to Pittsburgh and go play a game. Like, you know you're going to get smacked. Dude, listen, I got them. They're my Super Bowl team, man. I would love to be right about it. The only thing I worry about is at times, you know, like on 3rd and 11,

they're running, you know, they're running slants and just being like Deonté Johnson, go make somebody miss. Go figure it out. But that's the other thing. I'll take that. I'll take that. Give me a completion. Play the field position game. Maybe you don't get the first down. Maybe you do.

punt the ball and the series with a kick. So what? And then let our defense go strap it up and beat your ass again. You know, like, that's okay for them. That's like in the Steelers world of football, that's fine. I agree. I agree. I still like them to make a run. I think they match up well with the Chiefs, actually. Let's talk about the Chiefs. I think their weakness is boredom.

I think their weakness is boredom. I mean, I swear to you, Patrick Mahomes. gets bored and then like Steph Curry is what we've talked about here like how stuff gets bored and they have two wins against teams of winning records this year for whatever that right where do you see a weakness with the chiefs I mean their defense looks a lot better especially their run defense I remember that being a major issue last year and then even in like two minute situations they were God they gave up so many runs last year to like Tanna Hill and stuff they gave up like

huge plays and cover two man like they couldn't play cover two man late in the game to help them, you know, secure a lead. And this year they've definitely improved on that. You know, I still think you can try and get after them if you're going to run the ball. If you're going to make it, you know, a short game, limit Mahomes possessions and just stick to the run game. It's going to be, you know, it's dedication and you got to like totally commit to it. Because if not, you're going to be in a shootout and we've seen how those go with Patrick Mahomes. I don't know if that's the guy you want to get in a shootout.

a gunfight with. I don't. I don't at all. Um, those baseball player guys to scare me. All the good fucking quarterbacks these days are baseball players. I know. I know. Um, hey, NFC real quick. We got the saints who are suddenly the cream of the crop. Um, and we all wrote them, oh, not all of us, but we kind of like did the thing. I picked them early in the year, bro. I picked them to go to the Super Bowl and win. Did you stick, have you stuck with that on Get Up on ESPN? Have you jumped off the bandwagon during that trying time in October? No, so they didn't, I never had to be in on any of those saint segments. Thank God, because I might have jumped off the ship, dude.

But my whole thing is at some point, I really think Winston's going to have to play. He's going to have to play at some point, whether it's COVID, whether it's an injury. That's interesting. You know, and I just, that's going to be, that's going to tell me so much about Sean Peyton. If he does it with Teddy Bridgewater and James Winston, like, that is, going to be the ultimate yeah just like the ultimate like just patch on your letterman's jacket like you're a beast i think you i'll do you one better i think he's going to try to do it with taseom hill

before he tries to do it with jamess winston oh okay i think if if drew got hurt you know like and was out two weeks yeah he might he might start tason hill and be like how creative can i get to try to win a game and it would annoy the fuck out of me yeah i think well i think he'd go You still got to have, you still got to have James in there, I think. I'd love to see James get some time there. I mean, like, not for the, I don't want to see Drew get hurt, but if that was a situation, that's a guy I'm rooting for now because I think he made a really mature decision, joined the Saints and was like, hey, I'm going to bide my time.

Not that you had a lot of choices, but that's the place to do it and learn from Drew and Sean. So they're the top dogs right now. Let's go, I mean, because we know what the Seahawks weaknesses are, you know, ram. Well, they're just, their defense is just a bend don't break defense, right? Yeah. So, you know, they'd rather go, you know, let you run the ball, throw the ball all through the 20s, and then somewhere in the red zone either come up with a turnover or hold you to a field goal,

and they feel like they've done their job. Dude, the first half of that game Sunday, it felt like the Seahawks were playing two-minute defense with a three-touchdown lead. Like, guys were just jukeying around and then eventually, like, sliding after 23-yard gains. Like, Cole Beasley, just, like, running out of bounds on uncontested. I mean, that's a really scary situation for them. They could lose in the wild card. They could also win a Super Bowl, in my opinion.

Let's go bucks. I think their weakness is obviously the Saints at this point. Yeah, good point. Man, they just got manhandled in that game. And it seemed like they had some kind of crappy luck, not crappy luck, but they just went through a series of, you know, fourth downs. going to try fade on the goal line. You know, they went for it in some dangerous situations where they could have maybe got a

couple field goals. Yeah. Or just could have punted the ball away and played a little more conservative. And, you know, it's the second time playing that team in their division. So like, why not? You know, we lost to them before. Like, why not? I understand the thinking behind it.

But it just, it just seemed a little, you know, I don't know, like gunslingery. just seemed a little aggressive. I didn't like their defensive game plan either. A lot has been made about that, but I didn't like the whole rush for and just play zone. Yeah, I mean, it's just going to be a slow death. Like, you do that for, you do that against a young quarterback that, you know, you know is so impulsive. Like, they're not going to be able to just be patient and take the end of his completions. But for Drew Brees, it's like, dude, he's been doing this for 20-some years.

Like, you're going to just dive a slow death by a thousand paper cuts. Yeah, dude. That was it. So, I mean, like, yeah, last question before I let you go. If the Bucks and the Saints play in the playoffs, is the, I mean, to some people listening, this might be obvious. But to me, I think it's an actual, who's got more pressure on them? The team that's won twice or the team that's lost twice? Because the team that's lost twice can play that we're angry card, which actually, it actually works in the NFL as stupid as you should be angry. It's motivation, yeah.

You got that going for you. And then the statistical anomaly of losing three times in a season to somebody in your division is so low, they're like something's got to even out. The team that's won twice, I feel like your asshole might be a little bit puckered. What do you think? You might be. And you're constantly, you know, it's like having a big lead in the first half against a team that you know is good. And you're just like, whoa, like, do we just run the ball out? like run the clock out or keep going and coach like hey keep keep your foot on the gas like exactly

but how fast yeah we 30 35 yeah you know I'm cool just cruising here or so I agree dude that's that's a lot of pressure and you know the expectations are going to be so high especially from your fan base they're like oh we already beat those guys two times like dude this a really good football team so yeah they're scary and you just had a b join and like maybe maybe you are growing through that i would add one more weakness to the bucks and that might be chemistry man like that's it and i'm not just saying it's just time on task i'm not just saying ab like listen ab you your bet's as good as mine of how that's going to work out but bruce a couple times now after tough games has not really been complimentary of Tom and you know like it's just you sense that one more bad loss and things could get weird there

I feel like because everything I've heard out of New England with Tom and you were there but like Belichick treats everybody the same and if anything he rides a quarterback pretty hard when Tom made a mistake like boom he he'd get after him so I feel like there was some conversation there had to be you can be hard on me yeah yeah like if you ever got a you know you need a whipping boy like I'm your guy Yeah, but you need to just air somebody out, go for it. You can say that, but it's kind of like, and you've had different, like, if we were in a game week and somebody was like, I make a mistake and like the 54th guy on the roster, I said 54, I know what I said, is like, hey, Chris, you got to be in that gap. I'd be like, who the fuck are you? And I'm not likening Bruce Ariens to that, but what I'm saying is like Bill can say certain things.

And maybe there was an agreement, a handshake, but Bill can talk to Tom a certain way. and I don't know if Bruce can talk to Tom the same way. You know, like, it's just we've received criticism different from different people. And that was an extreme analogy. Bruce Ariens is a great football coach, but there's only one hoodie, right? Yeah, that's true. So that's my worry. It's just a different relationship.

It's different, you know, interpersonal dynamics and all that. And so it's, you know, I think it's just time on task. Interpersonal. I like that. Mark, appreciate you, man. We got a lot done today. I hope you come back soon. and enjoy your weekend.

We'll be rooting for the Jets in a week when they take down the chargers. Mark guaranteed a win. You know, he's the Jets quarterback at heart, so he likes to guarantee stuff. I did not guarantee a win. But I do want to tell the viewers I'm coming. They're mostly listeners.

They're mostly listeners. I should tell you this is primarily a podcast. The video is just so I can... You're wasting this. So I can see your beautiful face, Mark. And just in case we have to... Don't you waste this. just in case we have to do a social, all right?

You don't do, like, another guess I have, I just put them on audio. But if you've done the Baywatch photo shooting GQ, you got to be on video. You got to, hey, motherfucker, I've been in GQ too, okay? Whatever. You weren't a cover guy. No, I don't know. Maybe I was. I got to look back.

You mean, baby. Because it doesn't mean as much to me. You had to share the cover with somebody, probably. You have your cover framed in a black frame in your home gym next to the Nordic track. No. I don't even know if I was just a feature or if I was the cover. I don't remember. It's been a long time.

I got other, you know. Yeah, dude, whatever. I just wanted to tell the listeners and viewers that, you know, I'm coming in, streaming in live. Well, not live. Taped, recorded satellite from Ensenada, Mexico. Yes, you are. Damos and caballeros. Here we are.

You said cowboys? in there what damas and caballeros like ladies and gentlemen's not or caballeros is in cowboys that's gouchos that is kind of it's just like a phrase that's what they say did okay well when i come visit you whatever you can you know you can teach me more spanish bro i can't wait to invitation rescinded oh god hi dios mios all right see you later squant it's time to do a mailbag You guys that wait around to the end of these pods, you're like the cool kids. One day when this pod becomes big,

you're going to be like, yeah, but were you there for the mailbags in 2020? And I say to you, Chris, why not reinvent the wheel? If this mailbag is money, put it in the front. You're saying to put the mailbag in the front. Make squantch weight. Yeah, I mean, squanty. Make squant wait. Make squant wait.

I'm not doing it a third time. Yeah. It goes running out of steam. No, it wasn't run out of steam. I just worried people don't remember. Make squant. Wait. Nah.

I refuse. Especially not with eye contact. I don't want to chant anything. Anyways, there's nothing worse than starting a chant and nobody picks it up. You're right. You're right. It's like one of the worst feelings on the planet. I was a pretty

how you say spirited fan in my day and pretty good hit rate on getting everybody to join in but those ones that don't yeah I'd rather fall down in public than start a chant than nobody would you I mean is that

pretty fair like just a trip like in public crowded sidewalk there's no lonelier feeling than starting the defense I mean defense because you got a bail out at three or four as we just did with make squant weight. Yeah. I'm glad we got out of it. First question. This is from S-R-B-E-N-N-N-E.

I don't know how I would say that. You have to make a band name. The name has to include a type of pasta. I like this question. I really do. I've got a bunch. Are you down to one? Should I just fire? meaty ziti spaghetti rain Fusili Jerry It's not Fusely You're thinking of Musley And I'm and I'm talking about Fusili It's not COVID

You know who uh you know alo black What? Yeah Orzo Thick But TH ICCC Orzo Thick Okay And ravioli Aoli Aoli Aoli

What? Those are my five submissions. I just have two, but I have one that I'm positive if I were to start a band. It would get traction. Well, this would be the name. The first one, Reverb Raghu.

You ready for this? Yes. The parm animals. The parm animals. And remind me of the kind of pasta that's being used? Chicken parm. Oh, Jesus, Chris.

I don't think that parm... I extrapolated. But how about there's probably, I swear to God, there's probably a pasta that starts with palm or, no, ends in parm. I mean, the parm is the cheese on top of the dish. I know, but okay, we'll hold on a second. I just went full on Italian.

Now, if we want to scrap the question, the parm animals is great. Go back through yours a little bit. Spaghetti rain. That's a pasta. Meaty Ziti. That's a pasta. Orzo Thick.

That's a pasta. Foof silly Jerry. That's a pasta. Ravioli, aoli, aoli. See, the Aoli thing threw me off and I thought I had you. Listen. Forget the question. Farm Animals is good.

I didn't play by the rules. No. But to my credit, Parm Animals is a great band name. I agree with you. Chicken Parm. You get the loophole. Yeah, you fail the question,

but you come up with a good name in the process. I had that written down. I must have been not thinking. That's where all great ideas come from, though. If somebody asked for a type of cheese next time, you have a head start. Well, when I heard pasta, I just went Italian food immediately.

Just I'd stop looking at the question and I went down a rabbit hole. And is ragu a pasta? Or is that a dish? That's, you know, because you, see what I'm saying? I'm not, I know I'm wrong here, but. Yeah, I reckon I was out to lunch on that one too. It's a highly seasoned dish of meat cut into small pieces and stewed with vegetables.

Thank you. I'm not even sure if it's Italian food now. So is ragu Italian food? Well, now. Isn't, Bolanese. Well, now they're two different kinds of ragu. in Italian cuisine Ragu is a meat-based sauce

R-A-G-U That's where I see I've seen it in the grocery store before ragu R-A-G-O-U-T is a main dish stew Meat the ball So really you went O for two on pastas And are disqualified From the question

I'm up one to zero in mailbag Oh fuck dude Ragoo though tomato sauce I would I would move on to the Next question. First one.

First question. We're starting this drill over. Mailbag starts now. It's like a recount. I just restarted the mailbag right now. If you could see any movie performed by an elementary school playcast. And this is from, I have no idea how to say this.

Jaya Rabinick. Go ahead. Saving Private Ryan. Excuse me? Well, you, what? I haven't seen it. But I've heard that it's tremendous. I've also heard that it's about like World War II.

Yeah, I wanted to, I wanted to flip this question on its head and really. So you want to see toddlers go to war? You think it wouldn't work? All right? Blues Brothers. Oh my. A 1980 American comedy film directed by John Landis starring John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd, as Joliet Jake and Elwood Blues.

Characters developed from the Blues Brothers recurring musical sketch on the NBC Variety Series Saturday Night Live. Hmm. Yeah, that works. I guess that would be cute. Here's the movie, okay? Because I had, in my notes,

can't find any movies where something shitty won't happen to a kid if it was all cast with kids. Like, I stayed away from war movies for that very reason. This might not make sense to you, but obviously the right movie is the Matrix. Yeah.

Like little kids levitating and bicycle kicking with like ill-fitting suits on and wires attached to their. Goofy sunglasses and shit. Wardrobe. I mean, that'd be fucking awesome. Yeah, that's a good idea. The Matrix. Yeah.

It's been a while, but I have seen it. Karad didn't Dale. Dumbest things you've done and gotten hurt. You have one. I have a bunch actually. Really? I'm wearing a boot on my right foot right now because I have a bust. did, do we call it a pinky toe?

Is the littlest toe a pinky toe? Or is that just a hand? We just don't talk about that toe. I don't think people talk about that toe. Okay. My smallest toe. It doesn't really serve a purpose either, does it? Well, it hurts like hell and I can't do other things.

I was on track to run 26.2 miles in the month of November. And now I've missed two days because of this right foot. Like a marathon in a month? Yeah, we've talked about it. Yeah. I'm efforting. Yeah. So listen, my toe, my toe is like a, it's kind of like a like a plum.

It's got a bluish, light blue hue. Purpley hue. Ashley Schaefer's plums. Might take it to mock it. Special two plums for one. Yeah. Bite into it. The juice is right.

If I recall, recrantly. So, yeah, and I did that, walking into a table a couple of nights ago. It's like when you hear the pitcher before the World Series game or the golfer before the big tournament, they get into some accident where clearly they were intoxicated and fell, but they say, oh, you really had that injury. I slipped. I really had it. I got this articulating mount on the TV. Great purchase.

And I was setting it back to, you know, in as opposed to out and turned. And I wanted to make sure it was level. right because i've because you're oCD and um i'm looking at the tv as i'm backing up and turning trying to get a good shot at it so my lovely wife can watch a level tv in the morning yeah and and and and pow right into the table and now i'm in a walking boot shut the fuck up dude you're actually wearing your referee sneakers though right now well i thought about that it's a podcast so nobody can see right

And my parents said that I could pick up a walking boot if I wanted to from their house. Okay. And so yeah, I guess I'm not totally telling the truth. So you don't really have a boot? Well, I have access to it. So you're dramatizing a stubbed fifth toe. We don't even talk about fifth toes. Like no one has talked about a fifth toe all year, anywhere.

You want to see it? That's a picture of it. Yeah, you've got a brew. bruise on your Oh, a bruise. That is, it's a disgusting swollen purple. It looks like Schmeagel's

little hand. I don't know the reference. Lord of the Rings. You seen that movie? No, God no. Sci-fi. What about yours? Because I have more.

I don't really have any. I'm, like I don't really hurt myself a lot. Perfect. Because I'm really, I really try to avoid those situations, you know? You see this hand?

Yeah. That's my fist. I cannot go any, any farther with that finger. And it's because of a slow pitch softball game in college. Damn, dude. I was catcher because I was a liability in the field. Unfortunately, I didn't grow up with the game.

Yeah? Didn't care for the game. No. And it's the playoff, so dudes running hard around the ball's hit. Dude's coming around third toward me, ball to me. Hot corner. I catch the ball, tag the guy out. but he bowls me over, jackass.

And so I go to the dirt. And meanwhile, a guy who hit it's not the third out is still circling the bases. So everybody's yelling at me, third, third, third, third, third, third, third. Yeah. So I get up to throw it to third, and the ball falls out of my hand because all of the front part of my finger is under the second part of my finger. And people turn away. They're like, oh, they can't even look at it. I look down at it nearly throw up, put it in my stomach.

and yank it out. Felt great for 30 minutes and then the worst pain of ever experience. That's a, that's a dislocation and two breaks in my pointer finger. I can't make a fist. Would you say it was worse or the same as the DAC Prescott injury

as far as just being really gnarly to look at? Same as. Wow. Bro, I had a bundle of finger. What, is this the knuckle? Do we have two knuckles? Dog, look at my middle finger, motherfucker. or look at all my fingers.

Look at me trying to close my fist. This is me trying to make a fist. Okay? I mean, I could make a fist, but all my fingers have to stay flat like that. If I try to honestly bend my fingers and make a fist, I look like I'm doing gang signs. That's true, but you just did a pretty good...

I can do it like this, but all my fingers are flat. Okay. Can you curl your fingers and make a fist? What? I can... This is... This is it. Okay.

Okay. Okay. I need to say, if I had been taken out of the game, we would have forfeited for some weird rule. Yes. I stayed in the game. Golly, man. Drew a walk at my next A-B while I'm basically crying. How do you draw a walk?

Oh, because I look like I'm good through the tears. No, no, no, no, no. They were there 20 minutes ago when you had... The guy couldn't find the strike zone. And I acted like I was going to swing on every pitch, drew a walk, got to first, went to the hospital afterwards. What other Joe Thysman type injuries have you had? I told one friend, and now I can't make a fist, and the friend said, why would you ever want to? And I thought, hey, man, that's a great thought.

That's some, that's some Zen shit, you know? I guess. I can't make a fist. Why would you ever want to? Who would ever need to? Amen. Peace and love. No, dude, I don't buy that.

But I love the fact that you bought it. Well, you might want to buy into it. You can't make a fist either. All your fingers are squashed down on your left hand. Look at this shit. I'd tell you that's about it. That's about it. My brother told me to sit down in the golf cart when I was a little kid,

but I kept standing up holding on to the thing. Went over a bump and flew out and I got the scar on the... the knee that everybody has. Let's go. Oh, wait man's stats. You look like Seth Rogan's twin. I'm sorry? I actually got this this week and I thought it would be fun to share.

A guy said I looked like Seth Rogan's twin. And how do you feel about that? I felt really not great about it. Because I, you know. Oh, I see what you're doing. Now you're going to tell the people who you actually look like and it's going to be like. I'm not going to con you, no con.

Fast bender. Look what I have. in the, look what I have in the, that's fucked up. I get the guy also from forgetting Sarah Marshall. Segal. Yes, dude. I'm not getting any good ones. But look up Seth Rogen now.

2020. I am. Love Seth Rogen. Looks totally different now. He's doing the Letterman thing. Yeah. Doesn't so much look like you at all. Thank you. Kevin Love. Clear that up. Kevin Love, that I could see that. Okay. Larry Nance Jr.

Larry Nance Jr. You want to tell the people about the Larry Nance Jr. thing? Sure. You look identical AF to Larry Nance Jr. That's the story. People put into your machines Larry Nance Jr.

And you'll get a C-long dopple deal. It's just funny. Because you're batting about 500 on convincing people that I look like Larry Nance Jr. Well, at first glance,

one might say not. but if you really pay attention at first glance the bone structure is identical Larry Nance Junior Osolat Pizza what was your biggest

oh shit moment like when I realized I could light a J on the stove top I mean I took a liberty with this you know just any sudden realization that made me think like holy shit how did I not get that

the first 30 35 years in my life I think that's what he means, right? Yeah. Okay. Do you have any? Yeah, two. Okay. One is the arrow next to the gas pump symbol on your control panel on your vehicle.

Yeah. The arrow tells you what side of the car your gas. Oh, yeah, for sure. And listen, I've never not known that just because I am notorious for running out of gas, right? So I got to know my way around the... Right. And I'm not saying I was in my 30s, but... I wasn't 16 when I found that out.

And I also wasn't pulling up every time in my own car to the wrong side. Like, oh, messed it up again. But this is helpful in somebody else's car and a rental car. Yeah. The arrow points to the side of where you stick the gas. Yeah, the nozzle. The nozzle. You got it.

You really got it now. Yeah. Yeah. I've got that. My second, Chris, was the revelation. maybe 12, 13 years old, that I could be the one who ordered the pizza. Prior to this revelation,

I'd have to ask my parents, hey, can I get a pizza or something? Oh, see. But when you got the dough from the chores, you live in the house, and you have access to the phone. You can call Domino's and get the 20-ounce Coke,

the sausage grease, green peppers and pepperoni pizza with the hand tossed. That's baseball, that's baseball postseason party pizza, which is my favorite kind of pizza. You probably never played baseball. Well, again, just the slow pitch softball, yeah, which. But that pizza like sports, banquets, like, you know, summer, you know, Little League get togethers, that's Domino's.

That's the best kind of pizza there is. And when you're a kid, when you're a teenager, it's amazing. you could make that person come to your door. Right, right. That was huge. TGIF is on. Holy smokes.

I can do this myself. Yeah. I can call the store. I don't remember the day that that occurred to me. The problem is, the one problem was I didn't understand, I was in charge of the entire operation. I didn't understand tipping that first time.

And so the guy's pulling out like 237 to hand me back because I didn't realize that he gets. You know, 20 years later, the kids on your street get chocolate covered pretzels for Halloween. So, oh, they were chocolate covered? I don't know. I'm not even for sure that they were. I think they were just in the shapes of like pumpkins. Oh, wait a second. There was no chocolate on those pretzels?

I'm going to have to get back to you on that. I think we just handed out pretzels. No, you've never changed, not from the kid that didn't tip your first Domino's delivery guy. I wonder if that guy's listened to the pod. Like, I don't love the notoriety this, uh, this guy's getting. He's a fucking fraud. Hey, by the way, in COVID times, when we have a separation from cashier

to patron, and they say, hey, I can touch the screen for you. There's no way you can say, no tip, please, on the $4 coffee drink. Yeah, you're right. It says either $1, $2, or $3. And when I say, uh, 50 cents, please, can I put

50 cents? I sound like a jackass. and what I really want to say is no tip. It costs $4 for you to spend 10 seconds making my coffee, which I love and I appreciate it, but it's $4. And I also hope you have a great day. Yes, have a great day. I would tip. I do.

You have to. You have to now. Bro. Every time at the grocery store, they could be like, would you like to donate $5 to the Mirkat Rescue Society? I'd be like, you know, the guy's at the cashier and he's like,

mirror cats there's not too many of them left and you're just like oh fuck mash it for the mere cats bro whatever they want you to donate to it's also well you got the problem of being you they might recognize you yeah i got the problem of going to the same place every single day so i'm gonna get a rep if i don't so end up doing it but if i'm at a grocery store and it's like would you like to round up to help save humans yeah that's a nah for me really yeah

You just don't do it through grocery stores. That's not your style. Right. It's not going to be, you're not going to remember me. They're not going to remember me at a grocery store. So you're just giving, you're giving off memory. Just like, for me, it's the morality of like, oh my God, I'm, I'm being apathetic right here to the mere cats. Yeah.

I host charity events. Oh my God. Do you hear this? On my free Saturday. You're selling a Karen. I host. To provide clean water. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Yeah. To people without access to it. Man, that was a Herculesan effort, and I appreciate you. And fuck yeah. It made my day. But just give the 14 cents next time. Okay.

Next time I'll round up. But I want to be able to see, with the touchscreen, I could hit no tip in peace. Quietly. They don't even know until you're out the door. Right. Yeah, but here's the thing. They do know, and then you come back tomorrow.

Just like you said, you're there. They only know if they know the exact price of the drink. Like, hey, your drink's 419. And then they go off to put the cup under the freaking spout. What do you tip on a meal? Is this like a political question? Like, is this asking people what they tip like a politics type question? It's weird.

That feels like a totally, totally different. different scenario for me. I tip well. Yeah, I figure you do. At least 20. Yeah, you got to. I was just, I was like, man, this would make for some good content if you tip like 12%. Like, there are people like that, huh? It's all, it's all context. Are there people that tip like 10%, 12%? Yeah, sure. 5%. Like if you tip 5%, you might as well not give a tip, huh? Like, and you just,

you just act like a full on asshole because you are. And I need to be clear. I'm not doing the roundup thing. Yeah. Mostly, I don't think. Maybe on an occasion if I've highly caffeinated or something, I am tipping like crazy on these coffee drinks. I just think it's BS how we're now forced to. And I can touch the screen for you. What would you like me to hit?

I say, a dollar. What's 10% on a 419, 41.9 cents? I'd mash that all day long left to my own devices. But that's not on the screen where I go and get my coffee. It's what you will be giving $1, $2, $3, no tip. I can't say no tip. Yeah. They know me.

I'm the espresso guy. Sick. I know it's espresso. I say espresso to be hilarious. I am dying laughing. Sitting next to a guy who just doesn't tip for the coffee. I do tip. Open your ears.

I tip. I know. It's an issue of there's no option for rounding up or rounding down. I. Or putting sense in. Got it. Because we're being careful. So I'm not allowed to touch the screen.

because of the ongoing novel coronavirus pandemic, which I get, it's fair. Just give, I just, oh, I don't know, man. H.M.C. Grady, what video game or movie world do you want to live in? Easy. Downton Abbey, the movie. I've never seen it. Okay, Downton Abbey was a TV show.

Chronicling British royalty. Yeah, I hate stuff like that. I absolutely hate movies and shows set in like fucking, what time period would that be? Like early 20th century, like 19, I think they started right around Titanic. That put us at 1912 through the 20s. Yeah, no, that wasn't what I was thinking.

I was thinking of the fucking kings and queens with the crowns and shit. And they sit on the big chairs and there's gestures and stuff like that. Like what's that medieval times? Right. I'm not, yeah. I'm just, I'm going back 100 years. You're just going back 100 years. And I'm going to live in a castle. Yeah. It's going to be a bunch of drama and shit. You know people smell back then. Well, nah. I think so. Well, some did, just like some do now. I don't think they bathed a lot. I don't think they smelled very good back then making. There was running water. Not a lot of it. Since. I run a foundation. And, uh, I run a foundation. And, uh,

or hallmark charity, as you know, is called Water Boys. There were not, there was not a lot of water. Yeah, it was just people just walked around with stinky butts. They also had hairy, hairy areas. Everybody had a hairy, stinky butts, hairy areas. Bad hygiene, bro. Didn't brush their teeth, like no Colgate. Yeah.

Still. And if you get like a fucking sinus infection, you die in a day. Yeah, but I'm living at a castle. Yeah, well. Doctors come to the castle. Yeah, well, they're the same shitty doctors that are doing fucking surgery with a fucking tourniquet and a,

and a saw that you would get at lows. And they put some, like, essential oils on it. And they're like, yeah, you're good. Oh, let's make sure it's not infected. Let me fucking put a bick lighter in your leg. It's the roaring 20s. It's not. Oh, it's the 20s.

It's not. I was thinking like, I know, the doctors were still pretty bad in the, I'm thinking like 1900. I'm thinking boardwalk empire. I haven't seen that one. The doctors sucked back then.

They didn't? No, no, no. These were top guys coming to, uh, good Lord, it's been a long time. What's the name of the damn castle? high clear in real life

that's not what we called it in Downton oh I think it was called Downton Havie but no way is it a girl movie is it a guy movie it's people who like period pieces

anglophiles who like period pieces of whom I am one you are going to settle into being an old man so fucking well thanks yeah and that's a cool thing I mean but like

you're going to to like to chill and read like leather bound books tomorrow. Hey, I'm making fires these days. My lovely wife Meg said that she's worried that at some point soon, you and Kate don't like to get drunk anymore with us. Yeah, I've been worried about that for a couple years now. Because you're just like, oh, I'm trying to land this plane. It's not like drinking.

It stinks. Yeah, I know it stinks. But then the night you do it, it's really fun. So I just. Yeah. once in a blue moon I reckon I was near you not too long ago you were high as shit

on drugs I was sober and we still had a grand old time when was the highest shit on drugs when were you not huh oh making yeah I guess for me it's EWalk land

is that fake stuff the EWarks yeah Star Wars yeah like they They just had a really nice setup. It was gorgeous there. Look it up. EWalk Land.

Would you be one or would you be human in EWalk Land? That's the part that I can't quite work out. Yeah, EWarks, man. I don't know. I just remember when I was a kid watching Star Wars and thinking, these guys got a good setup. Yeah, they live up in trees, like tree houses and stuff. You want to live in a tree house?

Sometimes I do. Without the deodorant. in the cologne. No, no, no, I want to live in a tree house. So wait, let me get you straight here. This little fellow looks mighty hairy. Yeah. Isn't showering.

Yeah. Has no access to health care. And that's, that's everything you just gave me shit for in Downton Abbey. You're absolutely right. Thank you. You're absolutely right. Which is why I would pack a dop kit. Mm.

and I'd have my phone so I'd have WebMD like I still have the same Oh that's a big part for me Yeah pre phone no phone No like I have to hear about the Titanic Via Telegraph

Telegram Yeah one of those Ewks man Bride guy asked Which president throughout history Would you most or least want to get stoned with Again I want to Remind the listeners

That all mailbag questions don't have to be marijuana related. I'm a functioning human being. Father of two. On a foundation. One half of a great podcast. Brigh guy asks, again, which president do I want to get stoned with and which one do I at least want to get stoned with?

I don't know. The chalky answers here would be like, oh, Teddy Roosevelt, you know? He's like kind of a folklore type. Barack Obama would be a terrific. He, did he inhale? I think he did. William Jefferson Clinton did not.

Another good chalky pick, if you're asking me. No, I don't want to smoke with that cat. Are you cereal? Yeah, I'm pretty serial. No, thank you. I'm going to go with Millard Fillmore. Nice. Come on down, Millard Fillmore.

Just a fucking random. random ass president. Probably the most random president there is. The 13th. Yeah. Barely ever heard of him. I actually hadn't heard that name since high school. And I just feel like he'd be interesting.

I wickied him last night. Nice head of hair. Good head of hair. Oh. And also he's the type of president you're not nervous to smoke with. Because he's just fucking Millard Fillmore. he's just like you he just happened to be president

I think he was accidentally president because who was it before him the president before him Zachary Taylor Zachary Taylor they fucking killed him on accident with Mercury

so he wasn't even like elected president he wasn't voted in so like I would feel so just at ease next to him he's just the dude he's Millard fucking Fillmore only thing about him he was a huge pussy about

about ending slavery. Maybe you could talk to him about that. Changes mine. I think it'd be one of those great nights until it'd be like, have you watched the news this week? And then he just starts telling on himself. And then he would blow him a high.

There was a quote that I thought was, I just wanted to share about Millard Fillmore. This is from a Yale professor. To discuss Millard Fillmore is to overrate him. That is some, that's harsh that is fucked up dude

that stings and I don't like it I don't like it I don't like a one beat I don't like a one be it not one be it I don't I don't like it

he was the 14th comptroller of New York and he was preceded as comptroller by Azaria cutting flag read book this

man we're going to do a segment called commander and chief get it no chief like smoke like chief commander and chief and we're going to invite presidents onto the pod to get stoned and do a mailbag okay and do you have any connections uh reservations at all that it's commander in chief yeah well whatever whatever motherfucker god damn Really? Yeah. Fuck, I forgot. Did I say Commander-in-Chief? Yeah, it's a tough one. I guess I never really say it.

Commander-in-Chief. Not lately. Not lately, yeah, the last four years. Commander-in-chief will be the name of the segment. That's a good idea. That's a great idea. You're sort of one-for-one already. I don't know if you recall it correctly or not, but I was the student body president at our high school. Wow.

And you did get a contact, Todd. the other day. You're sitting with one. Do you have a president that you most or least want to hang out with? Because that's how I'll adjust that question for you. Hmm. What murky waters we're waiting into. Right, exactly. I'll hang with the great Thomas Jefferson.

Didn't see that one coming, did you? Bill Clinton, good hang, bro. I'll stand up for Bill Clinton. Yeah. Again, I don't know about getting high on drugs, but tricky Dick Nixon might be a good time. Abe Lincoln, shout out. Yeah, I think he could probably hang. Abe.

Those are some names of presidents. Yeah, those are. Yep. All right, so that should do it for this edition of Mailbag. Again, thanks for sticking around. On Monday, we'll be back. Macon and I will split the Sunday awards for a week. What is it,

10? Sure. I think it is. I'm not positive. We'll do the awards and I'll be giving you a bunch of monologues from the studio because Macon's too tired to do a podcast and he's going to be at home

spooning a pillow in his pajamas. That's about right. So yeah, catch you Monday morning and y'all can take care take care of yourselves