Green Light with Chris Long - Space Vapors and Clearance Candy Corn

Episode Date: November 2, 2019

Sports Betting, NFL and Fear Factor. The Halloween Green Light Podcast with Chris Long | Chalk Media. It is Chalk Media’s Halloween Edition of the Green Light Podcast. Space Cowboy, Chris Long brings Stanford Steve into the Chalk orbit for his weekly appearance to talk sports betting and get Steve’s top picks for this weekend’s NFL and College Football games.  To help get Chalk Nation in the Halloween spirit, Green Light recreated their own version of Fear Factor with a friendly snake, a spider and a genetically engineered cricket.  Chris Long gives his thoughts on the NFL Thursday Night Football game between the San Francisco 49ers and the Arizona Cardinals and his insight on NFL Week 9. Studio guests include former UVA defensive tackle, Nat Collins and the mystery man himself, Macon Gunter.  Check out our Fish Bowls with Aaron Donald and DJ Premier: DJ Premier Talks Hip Hop & Rap in The Fish Bowl | Chalk Media https://youtu.be/vkDhb6p3V6Y NFL Football Star & Rams Aaron Donald in the Fish Bowl | Chalk Media https://youtu.be/nAjGQKsDxfk About Chalk Media: Following the unfiltered voice and vision of Chris Long, Chalk Media is the interactive online community for you, the intelligent and humorous sports fan. Driven by access, Chalk delivers a unique perspective that cuts through the canned talking points and provides a variety of content from your favorite sports and entertainment celebrities.  Here at Chalk, we don’t take ourselves too seriously, but we are rooted in challenging the perception of professional athletes. We embrace the “real” with a unique combination of humor and intelligence. Chalk is a community with a voice beyond 240 characters that brings a perspective and vibe to a traditionally brash and boastful sports media space. Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more. Nothing is off limits at Chalk - hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. 🌍🏀🏈SUBSCRIBE NOW ⚾🏒⛰️ http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Houston, we have a problem over. Happy Halloween. 8-0. How does that feel? Feels great, baby. Happy Halloween right back. Got you. Thanks so much. Definitely. No problem. Right after that video cuts, he walks into somebody

because he's awkwardly looking back at Aaron Andrews. Jimmy G. had an efficient night on the field, made a lot of good decisions, probably his worst decision in a post-game, arguably hitting on an NHL hockey player's wife. referring to a female sideline reporter as man is not a good look yeah baby is a worse look it's probably worse than man that's right for sure uh and and by the way i'd like to mention shout out to jared stole um Aaron Andrew's real husband Wikipedia has it wrong after last night

get your shit together Wikipedia Jared stole is an Adonis bro and a hell of a guy hell of a guy We partied with him after the 2016, 2017 Patriots Super Bowl. Patriots party was a little bit crowded, let's just say. Frustrating. So we dipped out to a hotel bar, ended up with, I think it was Joe Buck. Joe Buck, Troy Akeman, yeah. Joe Buck, Troy Aikman, Aaron Andrews. Howie Long.

Howie Long, making Gunter. We'll bleep out his name. I don't want to docks him. He's not just a producer. He is a talented real estate agent. Cameron Fry, by the way. Ferris Bueller. Oh, yeah.

Space Cowboy. I'm not just a big Gordy Howl guy. I'm not saying I'm not a big Gordy Howl guy. Yeah, what do you have against him? Nothing, but Cameron Fry is the look here. We love hockey on this pod. We love Jared Stoll. Also this week, it wasn't just Halloween, which I could dress up for.

This is the Halloween clearance podcast. Everybody did this shit yesterday. We're going to do it for maybe another week. I might dress up for a couple weeks. I went to a Brooklyn Nets game this week, and I know what you're doing, Nets. You're trying to pry me away from the loving arms of the New York Knickerbockers, a team that I've been having a love affair with since I was nine years old. And I'm okay with it because things are bad at MSG.

And at the Barclay Center, beautiful. State of the art. They rolled out the red carpet on the heels of Hoops 2-0, which is the basketball chapter of my Waterboys initiative, led by Malcolm Brogden, the president, Joe Harris, Garrett Temple. Those guys, of course, were all together on the court as the Pacers took on the nets.

By the way, Kyrie Irving, you got to see them in person. This isn't a flex. Courtside, it's the best way to watch any professional sport, hands down. Even better than on the glass in a hockey game. I know there might be a hot taste. football front row might not be the play but I'm with you on all the others I don't like going to football games don't people want to talk to me about football it's all unhealthy food your boy's a healthy guy but as I'm sitting there sizing up the celebrities in attendance because in Brooklyn that's the new

hot place with KD arriving Kyrie Irving the beautiful facility Brooklyn is kind of the up and coming place in New York. By the way, Brooklyn is beautiful. I wasn't seeing like Nick's type celebrities, but I looked right across me and here's this ginormous dude caught my eye. And yep, it's Justin tuck. So I start texting him close up pictures of himself sitting courtside. He probably didn't appreciate that. But he hit me back and laughed and he said, I had no idea that was you. You look like a hipster. Do you look like you could live in Brooklyn? What are you 225? Let's stop with the weight shaming. Tuck. Not everybody can stay jacked after football. I'm doing the podcast thing now. That demands my stamina effort and physical abilities. And you, what are you doing? You're going to Wharton.

Well, to be fair, there was a jean jacket in play for you. Yeah, let's let's let's let's show that this is what we call Brooklyn drip on the left here. That's what the kids are calling that. That's an old Navy jacket. Get the look. That's a T-shirt from Homage, not homage, homage, homage. Out of Cleveland, Ohio, I believe they are. Those socks were bought at a department store,

and those are common projects. The hat is Carhart. Very few can pull that off. I'm not a hipsa, though, but I do love Brooklyn. We had 140 sacks on the hardwood between me and Tuck, and I was safe to say, I think, that we were, The most well-represented past rushers as far as production on the hardwood that Thursday evening. It pried me away from baseball, but I really enjoyed it.

As long as like Strayhan or one of these really, really good rushers wasn't in the building, we were the top dogs. And it was cool to see Tuck. He was always cool to me when I was young, good dude and all seriousness. An absolute legend. And somebody who treated me good. So shout out to Tuck. I had to ride home after that Thursday night game. Last night we did the show at Amazon with K. Adams and James Co.

I was bum Phillips. This is me having two costumes. Can't get enough. This is Space Cowboy. And by the way, I inhaled some of those space vapors on the open. And I am powering through this intro to Green Light. Which I forgot the intro through. This is Green Light.

And I'm your host Chris Long, space cowboy. This is Macon. We also have candy corn eater, Nate Collins, who will hear from in a bit. College teammate, professional football player, Uber driver in his spare time. A Renaissance man also likes candy corn, and he likes joining us for the pot. He also has a pot of his own that I will plug later. But last night, five-hour drive in a torrential downpour. You don't like to talk to your driver.

whether they're Uber drivers or otherwise. We can ask Nate to weigh in later. I don't prefer it. I like the swipe quiet, please. Silence is an auto, five out of five stars. Auto. Yeah. You could probably crash into a light pole.

If you're quiet. Four out of five, yeah. Four out of five. My rating is 4.93. I'll probably ask Nate if that's actually good. But this wasn't an Uber. I actually got a driver. And my dude was pretty cool.

Usually if a driver talks, I'm not happy. he had a cool accent, kind of a British accent. He did a business pitch a little bit. Not usually a fan of that, but it was a great idea. NDA, you know that whole deal, I can't talk about it. We crossed into Virginia state lines and he asked me, he goes, what's the Dia situation in this state? Deer.

Yeah. A lot of deer here. In case you didn't know, this is the mid-Atlantic, eastern seaboard of United States. There's a lot of fucking deer out here. I don't know that you asking me, going to help you better prepared to drive the car. So, like, maybe I can't give you the analytics on that. Drive it straight. Try not to get us mortally wounded in conversation is the play there. Baseball this week, obviously I was at a Nets game, had the TiVo and get the coaches tape on the

decisive game seven victory for the Nats. Shout out to Doolittle and Zimmerman. How cool is that? Wahua. Wahua. Two good dudes. Two good dudes. Two good dudes. Two dudes used to tear it up on Ellywood Avenue. 14th Street. Rugby Mac. Famously, Al Groh, my college coach used to say nothing good happened after midnight. And Nate pointed that help before the show on Ellywood Avenue. Of course, what we did is we just went down to Mellow Mushroom, four blocks down, and we stayed until 3 a.m.

University Avenue gets you out of the Ellywood mandate. Yes, we were out of the mandate. But these guys are going to tear up D.C. like it's Ellywood Avenue and like it's this guy. Gyration. Stud. What do you think that was that a freestyle or butterfly? Yeah.

Yeah. Butterfly? Yeah. Graceful. Yeah. Once he got the shirt off, even if it was just 99% he was home free. Yeah, he was home free. He was going to be the star of the show.

He was ready for that thing and D.C.'s ready for that thing. They make me a little sick. They're a bunch of front runners. They have a hockey champion in the past couple years. They have a baseball. champion the past couple years. Mystics. Mystics. Can't forget the Mystics. I never would. No. You're a pig mystics guy. I know that about you.

He can vouch. I actually got WMBA League pass. Checking out the Mystics. Talking Mystics could be a segment. Talking baseball will be a segment next week with Wookiee, my high school coach who you guys enjoyed. I got the feedback you like him. First time on camera he did pretty good. He's also in my fantasy football league. He knows that stuff. The last place winner, or the last place loser, or winner, depending on who you are or what you like, has to get died tips. Like Guy Fieri style. Macon's in the league.

I'm middle of the pack right now. Yeah, you are one game out of last and you're 10 points away from having the fewest in the league. But yeah, middle of the pack. Enough about my weaknesses. Let's talk about my strengths. That's the motto on this show. How would Coach Wookie do with tips? Wookie would not do good with tips.

He is very bald. He's been bald since he taught me or failed to teach me how to hit a curveball in high school. You got a picture of what he sent me. This is the rendering of what he'd have to do to his face. That is his beard dyed jet black. I could see him going that direction and keeping that look in perpetuity. I would love that. He looks like some sort of lawyer, wookie and wookie with a fucked up beard.

Yeah. But we'll get him next. week we'll break down all the action do little Zimmerman winning on the road they say that's big we'll talk about how pitching played it pitching was big in the world series wasn't it yeah that's good analysis by you that's what i'm here for fantasy football though kenyon drake shipped to the desert helping your boy out out to a really uh good start this week to say the least i looked up 10 plus points in the first quarter already paying dividends i knew i stashed him for a reason yeah GM of the year?

Team Long. Creative name, man. Creative as hell. Have any been renamed my team. Had Gosskowski on IR sitting there as my kicker for weeks, making his kind enough to text me before Thursday night games. Hey, fix your lineup, bro. Hey, died tips boy is what he calls me.

We will get to real football, though, and the Kenyon Drake impact in Arizona, the Cliff Kingsbury impact. Definitely an improved team. A little spoiler alert from my man. Dave Damasek, aka Nostr's Damashek. Yeah, look at him.

Calling shit. And Dave does a great job. He's great on uniforms. He's great on actual football analysis. Love to have you on Dave. Sometimes talk about uniforms. You know, we both go back and forth on that. Macon's also a big uniform guy.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Very snobby uniform guys here. By the way, the Niners uniforms last week remind me of my old NFC. West watching days. I was a Carolina Panthers fan growing up, as you know. Shout out to Uptown Cabaret.

A little gentleman's club I snuck into before the Continental Tire Bowl, circa 2002, underage, ran into a teacher. Charlotte is a great city, the Queen City. Love the Panthers. And I used to love watching the Panthers play, the Niners. Those unies against the Panthers and Niners brought me back. That was when they had the Saints and the Falcons in the NFC West. How fucking weird is that?

But the Niners are eight and no. First time since 1990. 2013 was the last time to beat Arizona in the desert. They come to this game number one in defense, leapfrogging New England, number three in rush yards per carry. Not last night. They were a little bit shaky on defense for the first time this year. Give up 23 points last four games in season.

Last night, of course, they gave up 25. And 3.3 yards per carry, definitely substandard. for them. Loaded box. That was the play. Make Jimmy G. beat us. And we've talked about this a lot. I talked about it last night on the show.

It's not that I don't believe in Jimmy G. I've seen him do it in 2016 in New England in spot-start situations with Tom Brady out, suspended. Won us a big game in the desert. Also lit up the dolphins before his shoulder exploded. But it's just that we hadn't seen him do it in San Francisco yet. and I'm not discounting him. I think he's going to have to do more of that. There are going to be games where it's out of phase like that,

and he was great. They actually threw the ball more than they ran the ball for the first time last night on the season, 37 to 31. He was 28 of 37, four touchdowns, 136 rating. I think that's good. I'm not an analytics guy, but that's good. Third down is where he made his money, 12 of 14, 159, 3 touchdowns, and he's 16 and 2 as a starter.

No wonder he was feeling like he could take his shot after the game, although that's not advisable. NFC West is back, like it's 2012 all of a sudden. Pretty cool seeing Richard Sherman post a picture today of him lined up, manned up on Fitzgerald, two guys who I really respect, seeing them still play at a high level from my NFC West days. It's like it's 2012 again.

Top to bottom, best division in football. Obviously, Niners on top and everybody else behind them. But even the bottom dwellers have improved. The matchup I can't wait to see is the Niners and Saints. I don't know how to go. I still think the Saints are the best team in the NFC. I also think, for what it's worth, if you're a Niners fan watching this, I'm not shitting on your team.

That's where we are now. If they're number two, all of a sudden I'm sliding them. I think they match up very well against the Pats. The team they have to beat, though, is the Saints. It's going to be a great matchup. they play. O-line and D-line, arguably the best units, respectively, offensively and defensively up front for those two teams. Week 14. Week 14, going to be a barn burner, tough place to win, and that's why home field advantage makes a big difference for the Saints. And we'll get to how

they weathered that Drew Bree storm in a bit. But Garoppolo looked different. Again, that big throw to Pettis, the pump, off schedule, he looked different last night. So he had an opportunity to win one, got to give him his props. He did it. Sanders trade gives him a number one receiver. They got a number one tight end who had an injury scare last night. I would keep an eye on the Kwan Alexander injury as well. But the Niners are real. So superlatives.

We are halfway through. We got to do that superlative thing where we do the yearbook thing, most likely to, least likely to all that shit. I want to start with Coach of the Year. Do you have a favorite, Coach of the Year? you go Frank Wright I know people call me a homer but we barely used to ever talk

in the hallway in Philly I know players love them players have to love them to overcome that impromptu August retirement by Andrew Luck came out of nowhere shocked everybody including guys in the building when I talked to guys in that locker room

in the wake of that they didn't know and they were surprised but you essentially have a backup head coach a backup quarterback and yeah, Bill could win this thing any year. The way he's morphed the Patriots into 15 different teams is really impressive over his tenure.

We've talked about that before. But Frank Reich, I got to give him the nod. He's missed in Philly. You've seen what the offense has done since that. And he's injected a lot of life into this Colts team and giving them hope. He's doing all the things that coaches do when they put their fingerprint on a team positively.

They're good in two minute, having given up points at the end of games this year, in two minute. They haven't given up 100 yard rusher in quite a while. Games in 20 now, I think it's like 26 games. They've been money in the red zone. And more than anything, Jacoby Brissette, who a lot of people thought of as a backup, is winning games when he has to. And Frank gives him the ability to know the difference between when he needs to win games and when he needs to manage them. He's throwing more touchdown passes inside the five than anybody the league. Red zone is huge. Their top five in red zone. That's coaching. That's Jacoby.

and when he beat the Texans, they didn't have a single first down on the ground, which goes to show you, even with Marlon Mack, he can put the team on his back and win games. Really happy for Jacoby. He's got a 1.32 percentage of INTs, and that is the lowest rate in NFL history through the first 30 games.

Guys, awesome. That leads me into my traditional MVP. Do you have one? Well, Coach of the Year, Matt LaFle, Fleur, 7 and 1, coming in, Aaron Rogers, whose team is it? Came in the Beast. They've navigated that, only a touchdown loss to Philly so far on the season. And we'll get to Green Bay in a minute, and that's interesting to say that.

I like that, I do, but I have some reservation about Green Bay. We can get to that, but he's had a tall order in coming in and managing the most talented quarterback in the league, who has had it out with coaches before. my MVP for traditional quarterback type is Russell Wilson. Coming to the year, I hammered the over on eight and a half wins for them. Really happy I did.

I thought it'd be more of a struggle. I don't want to jinx it. Probably already did. Sorry, Russ. 17 touchdowns, one interception. He's absurd. I know he's playing in Vancouver, so people forget about him. But he has seen the fall of the Legion of Boom.

They shipped all their players out on defense. They basically blew it up. but he's been able to through all the wide receiver turnover, through all the personnel turnover, through the bad offensive lines they've had, be perpetually awesome up there in Seattle, and a lot of fun to watch. So hats off to Russ.

He's my MVP. Yeah. I'll stay in Wisconsin. Aaron Rogers, 12, still doing it. I know you're going to get to him. Yeah. Dalvin Cook. Dalvin Cook is, Dalvin Cook, I'll get to because the next one is Hidden MVP.

Okay. And for hidden MVP, I mean, there's names you can float like Cook, obviously, because if he's not going, Minnesota's not going, and they have a legitimate chance to represent themselves in Miami at the end of the year. I know it sounds crazy and I'm riding the wave with them, but Dalvin is the key there. Nelson, Quentin Nelson, who's been huge in indie. There's a number of players I could have talked about here, but I think Gilmore in New England. The domino effect of having him there, he's like the new Revis, right? and Bill doesn't pay guys, but he knew exactly what he was doing when he paid him. And everybody's like scratching their head.

Like he was a good player in Buffalo. Now he's great. And he's the best corner in the league. That's kind of unanimous right now. 36 passer rating against 44 completion, 44 percentage. How do you say that? 44 completion rate percentage? What the fuck?

It's only a podcast. It's only a podcast. So 44 out of 100 times that they throw the ball at Gilmore, they actually catch it. There you go. Three IEDs, zero touchdowns at him. And in Buffalo, he wasn't really manned up a lot. He wouldn't travel with number one. Moore is expected of him in New England.

He allows them to blitz at the click they do. And that has allowed them to feast on rookie and young quarterbacks throughout the first half of the year. It's scary the rate they blitz at, and they do it with confidence because you can throw away the key on one half of the field. DPO-Y, this is a tougher one. I want to say Bosa, but I also want to pump the brakes. We talked about the coverage in San Francisco a lot.

The trend continued. Last night, their sacks were longer clock sacks. And by that, I mean coming into last Sunday, one out of 20 sacks were under three seconds. And then the big showdown against the Panthers. They had seven sacks. I think the quickest one was 3.85 seconds. The average was like 4.85. There were a bunch of north of five.

I want to throw Miles Garrett in there. got double digits already. Waterboy's captain on a bad team. It's really hard rushing on bad teams. Your boy knows that. He does it beautifully. One of only two guys with double digit sacks, Shaq Barrett and the other. Yep. We love Shaq Barrett, friend of the program, because he probably would like it if you saw how good we talk about him. There we go again with the friend of the program thing. Jamie Collins, I can safely say as a friend of the program, used to line up with him, love him when he went to Cleveland I thought he might be back he saw how it was there he's back in new england six sacks he's their best coverage guy best coverage lineback in the league their best

playmaker and he does this thing a lot which I can't do as well but I love it and he's just like you know yeah he's got swag new England could always use some swag I love jamie collins he might be my dark horse for defense player year comeback player that's jimmy gee I mean Not only is he coming off an injury A major injury He's been really counted out He's kind of disrespected a little bit

Biggest surprise Do you have one here? I'm going to go Cliff Kingsbury You got to give me something in this fucking thing Do you have an opinion On any of these superlatives? Yeah let me look at something here

Talk to me about Cliff Cliff Cliff was much malign coming in I mean I know he had that Boy Wonder look And people are getting real tired of that shit the young guys getting jobs when guys have been working away for years. But he's been a great play caller as advertised.

He's gotten the cards competitive a lot quicker than I thought he would. Some decision making last night was kind of questionable on the challenge and the icing, the defense time out. But I am surprised about that. Okay. Okay. If I'm looking at standings. Yeah.

And before the year you have Matt Ryan, Devante Freeman, Julio Jones, Calvin Ridley, Dan Quinn, Keanu Neal, obviously a huge loss, but Falcons at 1 and 7. That could be biggest letdown. That surprises me. But we have a letdown thing. Hit me. Biggest letdown in Atlanta? Yeah.

I think so, and it's been amazing that he's still lost that many games. You might be swaying me here. I was going to say Cleveland. But I also knew that Cleveland. I was buying Cleveland more because I think the AFC North wasn't that good. I didn't foresee it going this way. but Atlanta yeah playmakers at three levels of the defense Jared um the backer they got back um

Dion Jones I'm not completely listening to you so just keep it rolling and Neil uh who obviously is hurt in the third level but you mentioned the weapons they have offensively Matt Ryan's been really good all year big letdown um Browns I'd throw in there as well Browns this week at Broncos huge yeah that could get them to three and five they have two more against the Bengals, two more against the Steelers. We don't know what they will look like. That's a great call.

Dolphins on the schedule. They could climb back into it. They could climb back into it and there's only one way to go and that's up because it's been a rough start for them. And I got to say, they got to be one of the best offenses of all time, right? They scored 17 points or whatever it was. Maybe it was a 21 against the Patriots because they're the best defense of all time. 13.

It felt like 21 when you're doing that to the best defense. You're glad it wasn't 20 or 20. I was glad because I had the under in that game. Shout out to the Pat's defensive rotation guys. I will send you, what do you like? What do you still send edible arrangements to people, candy? Almond Joy. Almond Joy.

Thank you for looking out for your boy. Best free agent signing. I'm going to go with Ingram. I've always been a big Ingram fan. Super underrated. He was a big part of that Saints thing. And I was worried they weren't going to be able to recover from losing him. He was there closer. In the second half, he'd get the ball. Teams are tired. The pace is

different from Kamara. And he'd wear you down. And he's in Baltimore now in that Greg Roman system. That was great in my heyday in the NFC West with Frank Gore in that big O line, mobile quarterback. Greg Roman's been awesome. Ingram even talked about how many looks they get into to get to so many different runs. It can be really confusing for defenses and helps him be productive. I like Ingram. what say you? I do too. He's a big tuna. You might or might not be aware of that. It's our fantasy football league, which I think you've checked once or twice as far this year. Nick Chubb ran for 131 on the Pats. What does Ingram do against the Pats this week? Oh, if they're committed to it, I think he has a good day. But Nate made a good point, Candy Cornate, who you talked to in a bit. He said Belichick's

game plan could look totally different than what would be optimum for them. And I might agree because he plans on seeing them probably again. It's chestnut checkers with him, big picture. I don't know how the game plan him. I worry about and we'll get to it later in the previews, New England in man coverage. College player I'd like to see in the pros. This is something that's right up your alley.

Why don't you start? Do you have any? Yeah. Yeah, I do. Hussis Dubois. Yeah. Shout out to our boy, number eight, who's moss people up and down the field this year for the who's.

Somebody who absolutely will be. 34 Bryce Hall. Bryce Hall. Get well soon. Get well soon. You can go non-Virginia. Okay, I'll go non-Virginia. Chase Young, right?

That's the kid in Columbus who has been wrecking shop. These pass rushers are getting so talented. I'm glad I was born in 85. And I love C.D. Lamb. You like C.D.? Yeah. Is C.D.'s nuts in your mouth. T.

Gosh, I hope that gets cut. Look forward to watching this episode and seeing if that is in there. I love CD Lab. I have been on the hype trade for two years now. This guy is going to be fucking generational. He reminds me of a bunch of receivers I liked rolled into one. He doesn't play like a receiver.

I like that about him. Play of the year, I'm going to go Rogers throw into the corner of the end zone about a week ago. And a lot of people would contend he didn't know where he was throwing it. I think he did. Where, yes. And to whom? To whom?

Well, there's only one guy going to the corner of the end zone. He had Jimmy Graham in the vicinity. But Jimmy, I think he had... If he wanted to throw it to Jimmy, he wouldn't have put so much loft on it. Okay. Quarterback specials. That's my quarterback you're talking about, so hey. That's your quarterback in fantasy?

Yeah. Nobody cares about our fantasy team. Nobody cares about our fantasy team. Sell high, buy low. Sell high on topic. I'm selling the Packers to win games in November. In December, you have to be better up front in the run. And I think I've won a lot of games.

with questionable calls. Listen, there's nobody I love watching more than Aaron Rogers, and he will drive this thing, but I'm selling high. Buffalo bills, five and two. Arguably, hard to sell them high because they're living off of a close loss. That's it for Buffalo. And no disrespect to them. They're not quite a complete team yet. Who are you buying low? Buying low, I'm going to buy the Cowboys low-ish. I've been on the Cowboys hype train as far as them being a really good football team this year, making a run again. the new coordinator did a good job out of the gate.

We stumbled. We started to look like Garrett was calling the plays again. Now they've improved in a lot of categories offensively. I like them late to make a run. Yeah. I know they're coming off two wins, but they're also third in their division, L.A. Rams. Yeah, I would also buy them very low.

Absolutely. And their defense is getting better. As for trades, we've got to talk about that for a second. We'll bake it in the superlatives. Best and worst trades, best trades. I like this model of value trades. for mid-round picks for veterans like Marcus Peters, who can take that Baltimore defense in next level.

They've been scoring prolifically in Baltimore. He already has a pick six there. By the way, Ramsey gets shipped to L.A. Forces a fumble the first day. Those guys are turnover machines. He's got two pick-sixes on the year. The record's four. He could see that in Baltimore.

The worst trades for me, though, were the ones that didn't happen. I thought Philly could have gone and gotten any number of things. You know, they need somebody inside to help Fletch out. They could use some edge rush. I know they went and got the kid from the Browns, but that feels like more of a project. I think they should have got a Robbie Anderson.

I'm worried about Deshawn's health the rest of the year. I don't know. That offense has missed that speed. They quickly became a slower offense from 17. I think we have recency bias when we look at the Eagles and that Super Bowl run. The offense is a lot different this year. And they could use that force that can take the top off defense. Tori Smith was one.

DeShan, obviously, his health. Could have gotten a corner and Chris Harris didn't do it. I would have loved to see Trent Williams freed. That's a bad situation there. A.J. Green anywhere. My man is rotting in Cincinnati. I feel for him. And Akeep Talib.

Is he retiring? Is that what he said? Miami, right? Yeah, I mean, he... Synonymous? I think he really might retire. That is a tough blow. He might be the unhappiest camper.

of that trade sequence. And then there's the Jamal Adams deal, which I think there's more too than what we're hearing. But we can get into that at another time. Did you say Philly could use an edge rusher? It could, but not one that just hit his pen in an astronaut suit.

Got you. Although I know I can go get buckets right now. Got you. Let's do the fun stuff. How about that? Let's do it. Okay. So we're not going to do a big college fun thing this week.

Generally, my kid is relegated to going to a mid-major. there's going to be no Stanford, no UVA at this point until Pops learns to how to gamble a little bit better. Last week, though, I had a money line that hit Green Bay Packers, Kansas City Chiefs. One of a lot. There we go. We need that Jeopardy thing that we do audio-wise when we do the money line. I got Stanford Steve with me.

Steve, how was you had a cold brew? Was Halloween a rager for you? Actually worked, Chris. Took the kids out earlier. We were able to get that done, and then Scott had to work. So, of course, he never gets a night off. So we were out there grinding late. I know.

I saw you. I love the costumes, man. What are you, cone heads? You've been waiting on that one. No, it actually came to me. It came to me. Listen, hey, I'm the gangster of love. And you are supporting the troops today.

One-opping us. You're one-upping us. Always. We're not, we're not, I want to be patriotic. here. So we'll get to the picks. We'll get to your favorite three picks on the college football slate. Last week, neither of us did very well.

We're sub-500 off the bat. By the way, we should probably settle on what the bet is here. Yeah, well, first off, I thought we were just giving advice and then the people were going to be able to take it for what they want. Yeah, well, the people can take it for what they want, but I also want to compete against. What are you scared? I'm so shitty at gambling. All of a sudden, you're not feeling so froggy.

No, let's come on. Come on. Competition. What do you think? Ten minutes at an open mic club doing stand-up comedy and we got to go if you lose, you got to do the comedy, I'll come. Yeah, Macon likes it. Somebody suggested that on Twitter. Yeah, that's good.

That's what we came up. Give me one other suggestion. Or we didn't get into it. Tattoo of each other's faces. Like a pep boy style, logo style. No. 10 minutes? Oh, man.

10 minutes isn't that bad? Five minutes. Five minutes? Five minutes? Okay, five minutes in an open mic club of our choice of not, not, we'll mutually agree upon it. I'm not going to put you out there at the Apollo or some shit and you get booed off stage. Is that a comedy club? Yeah, I'm not. This has to be.

So the loser, and we can start the tally today or we can start it last week, has to go open. in my club and I will be there to support you when I upset you at years end. Why don't you lead off with your college football? All right, well that's what you have producers for so they can make that decision. Okay. Go ahead. All right. You got your favorite pick Saturday?

Yes, I do. I have three college football picks. We're going to go with the over and the Nebraska Colorado game. Both teams are getting their best players on offense back, quarterback Adrian Martinez for Nebraska, Rondale Moore for Purdue. People could say what they would ever want about

these two head coaches. I love these two guys. They'll have their ball offenses ready. I like that one. I like Liberty UMass to go over 69 and a half. It's only because of UMass. Listen to this. UMass is giving up 50 a game over 550 yards per game. They've given up 56 to Yukon, 69 to La Tech, 66 to Coastal Carolina, 52 to Charlotte, 45 to Southern Illinois, the Saluki's. They're not even division one. So we're going to think Liberty gets off the deck and scores a lot. UMass could score a little bit,

so we're going to go over the total 69.5 with Liberty in UMass. Nice. So, so, so, so, so, so. There's a lot of 69s there for the Minutemen. Yeah? Yeah, I guess maybe they like them. They have to like them. They don't have a choice. Next up.

Miami, Florida State. The under is coming 12 in the last 14 with these when Miami's on the road. The under in the last five has come in in Florida State's last five games. Hornerbrook's going to start for Florida State. They're a little better offensively, but I think that gives Miami more of a stationary target, you know, with that spread offense. The underdog in this game is 11 and 3 in the last 14 times they've met. So Miami's the underdog here.

I'm going to take the canes. It was plus 3 and a half this week. whatever it is. I like the canes plus the points here, even though the game's in Tallahassee. What say you make? Is that compelling? Quick analysis. Miami is not good. I've seen them in person. Neither is Florida State. That's fair. That's very fair. I've seen them both in person. I have some hurt feelings because they took down our club in Miami Gardens, Florida. Miami Gardens is a wonderful place.

Under. I'm with Steve. Under, under, under. I want to give you my My three, I like, right off the bat, I like Kansas getting six points. I am a big fan of Les Miles, and he's must-see TV. You love him. They played Texas really tough. I actually got that one right. Puka. That's my middle name.

Puka Williams, a good player. Yes, he is. So I like Kansas, getting six. I also like UVA and the money line. The odds are, what is it, plus 110? Yeah. You know, like, let's just go win the thing, right? Don't need the two points.

For once. Oldest. That's the worst team to watch ever. Stop it. Golly. Can we just, can we cut this or just pull the fucking cord with all these, we got all these machines back here. Is there one that we just pull it? I like Virginia in the Money Line.

It's the oldest rivalry in the South, and I'm riding with my boys in Chapel Hill. I also like Oregon getting forward. four points, or giving four points, actually. Macon, Macon is my Pact 12 specialist, not to hedge my bets and pawn this off on him. It'll probably be the only one to get right, Make. Yeah, Ducks. Four, that's nice. I've seen four and a half.

Hope it doesn't creep. Yeah, no need for. How many stadiums does Macon been to in the Pack 12? Ooh, here we go. Otson, Rose Bowl, Coliseum, that'll do it. Three. Never been to Stanford.

He wasn't one of the 17 people. at Stanford Northwestern earlier this season. Let's get to the guys that get paid for their likeness and more in the NFL. Yeah, that's see a cut of this gambling juice. I've got some Jets Dolphins numbers that I have to tell you. Let's talk about it. First off, we know the Dolphins story, obviously. They're scoring 11 points a game.

The dolphins have one run of 19 yards or more. They have one completion over 35 yards. It's been 50 years since two teams have met this late, which is week eight, with such a bad combined record, which is one win. I like the under. This is a bad spot for the Jets. I was on them last week. I thought they would cover the seven and a half with Jacksonville,

but I can't wait to watch this game because I still think Miami's playing hard, which is awesome. They are. But the jet, all the pressure, all the pressures on the jets, man. All of it. And you can imagine what the two weeks has been since Sam did the

ghost comment. They got to be feeling a lot of stuff down there in Miami. After that effort against the Steelers Monday night, I just think the under is the way to go in this game because it's going to be a struggle to score points. I'm going to also take

the Packers and the money line. My people in Cape Canaveral love the under. I mean, they've watched a lot of dolphins games at the NASA headquarters. You got people everywhere. Yeah, we got friends. Where don't you have people? We got friends of the program.

We have people. We don't have any people in the state of Maryland. We don't do Maryland. Sorry to Scott. Okay. What's your next pick, bro? I wasn't going to bring up. Packers Money Line.

It's going to be a home game out in Los Angeles at that soccer stadium that the Chargers play in. So I'm going to take the Packers there in the Money Line. And then Monday night, I like the Giants getting seven and a half. As long as you're getting more than a touchdown, that just feels stinky. We know what Prescott and Zeke did that in week one and just chewed them up. But the Giants have like a totally different team it feels like since week one. And I think they could score a lot better than they did with Eli at the helm, even though they went off 7-0 to start the season against Dallas.

So I'm going to take the Giants plus the points there. It just feels like a weird line. Doesn't make sense to me. Make, you're the Giants in-house specialists. Yeah, unfortunately. Go, G-Men. Steve, why is that Green Bay line only three? Because it's going to be a home game.

But why is it only three? But why is it only three? It breaks the rule, the axiom of in gambling insiders know this. You get three points at home, right? Is it three? It's three, but they're playing away from home. I know, so that's what I'm saying.

It should be six, because it's effective. a home game for them. I'm saying it should be higher too. That's why it feels like a stayaway. I think Steve gave us money line. He's not talking about the number. He's not talking about the spread. It just feels a little weird. So that so happens to be one of my picks. I'm actually buying a half point because it stinks. It stinks like and I think it's plus, what is it, 130 or minus 130 for them to get the, for me to buy the half point. I'm really nervous about it being tight, even though it is going to be like a home game for Green Bay. I mean, we saw what the terrible towels did there the other day.

Wait till you see a bunch of Midwesterners descending on Los Angeles in Orange County with cheeseheads. It's going to be an interesting cultural clash. And I think the big question mark is L.A.'s play calling this week. I don't know. I haven't heard who it's going to be yet with Wizz and Hunt fired. It could be a ball control game or it could be up-tempo depending on who's calling it. But I'm still, I already actually laid a good amount of duck it.

if you will, on the old pack. So I like them. I also like Colts minus one at Pittsburgh. That's, what's going on? You love the Colts. No one loves the Colts more than you. It's crazy. I love the Colts.

Quentin Nelson. Frank Duke. T.Y. Hilton. Dallas Clark years ago. Can you name another Colt? Sure. Sure. Peyton Manning.

Quarterback? He was good. I remember him. Also, I like the Titans Panthers over at 42. I think the Titans will crack a hole in that defense. Over? Yeah, I'm just telling you, right up the middle. This could be the one they run back and say, you fucking moron.

But I think the Titans dent the Panthers right up the middle. The Panthers really struggle with teams that run the ball up the middle. I talked about this before. You've got to bring a safety down and they get beat deep. And they gave up 52 points to the Niners with that same. formula. I think Derek Henry gets loose. I think it's chaotic, maybe some turnovers, and leading to points.

I like the over. Yeah, which is unpopular. That's the picks, right? What does Cameron think? What does Cameron think of those picks? Oh, mostly poor. I need to hit Steve with one more college game. A week ago,

Michigan Wolverines 45. Yeah, let's talk about that. Notre Dame Fighting Irish 14. This week, They have the Hokies come into town. Everyone's favorite division, the ACC Coastal. The Golden Domers are laying 17 and a half. Do you have a sense for that particular spread?

It's a tough spot for Notre Dame. You know what's amazing to me is how, like, the name this year is Urban Meyer. So like Urban Meyer to USC at the beginning of the year, then USC wins a couple games. And now Notre Dame loses one game and gets crushed. It's like, all right, buy out Brian Kelly. hired Urban Meyer bringing back to Notre Dame.

It's just funny to me, the Notre Dame talking points every week. It's fascinating. You've got to take the points, right? I mean, I know we don't like to talk well about the Hokies on this podcast or the show or whatever it is. They're not what it is. A video show.

Not friends of the program. One of the few. They've won three in a row. They won three in a row. You know, everybody gets, I know, you guys, I played there when I was playing in college. Like, it's the worst, it's the worst surface. Now they have field turf, but like it's the most overrated stadium in college sports.

Like, it's not a good atmosphere. And like, you just want to go there and beat them and just shut all their fans up. It's just, it's Notre Dame, you know? So I think Virginia Tech goes in with a little motivation. I would take the points if I had to take this game. I hate to say, I think that's the right side. I was just there a few weeks ago, surprised by how quiet it was. I will say though

The concourse Precine from what I hear Beautiful Beautiful The bathrooms Yeah I would take a nap in those bathrooms Just like just like at a church

Yeah Once you step inside the stadium Run of the mill Yeah Yeah the atmosphere And the field turf I'm not a big fan Yeah it only took them 150 years

To renovate the place Yeah well you know The church doesn't have any money So Anyways Uh Where were we? I got Breeders' Cup pick.

You want Breeders' Cup pick? Yeah, let's do some ponies, man. And when we look back at this, my son will absolutely disown me. If it's football, that's one thing. But if I'm betting ponies, yeah, go ahead. Take Yoshida in the Breeders' Cup. Just one horse. Yoshita and the Breeders' Cup.

Yoshita. Okay. Yoshita. And last week, kind of an ulterior motive here, I'll just admit, I had you on the show because you're awesome and people love you, but I also have you on the show to actually give me advice. from which I can profit financially, South Carolina last week. No, Buono. And then, you know, Notre Dame.

Yeah? I'm a little, I mean, I just, you. Are we just going to bring up all my losses? No, my losses were terrible. I mean, all week was terrible. Even in the NFL. I mean, the entire segment is predicated on my losses. Enough about my weaknesses.

Let's talk about my strengths. Okay. I do over, I do over anders well in the NFL. That's my specialty. I'm a money line specialist. I don't do it all well, Steve. I mean, Steve, thank you for joining us, man. I'm glad you've recovered from that alumni weekend.

We're here, buddy. What does that drink? Is that a Freepicino? No, it's a cold brew. Cold brew. I miss that from Jump Street. That's a callback now. He's had the cold brew. Yep, he has had a cold.

Trying to run a professional operation here, Steve. If you could hold off on the beverages next time, that would be appreciated. You know, Steve, Steve, in all sincerity, thank you, brother. Thanks for being here. We'll hopefully see you next week. We can talk off air, but open mic night sounds okay? Five minutes? Yeah, I didn't really have a choice in this one.

This is going to be bad. Why don't we pitch it back to the fans? We'll pitch it back to the fans. We'll punt a week. All right, one more week. One more week. We didn't get enough entries. Thank you for joining us, Steve.

We'll talk to you next week, brother. All right, are those king-sized pillows or queen-sized pillows in your legs? All my legs? those are just my thighs, bro Yeah Yeah, I do a lot of front squats Hacks squats. All right, buddy

All right, bro. Appreciate you. Well, I want to talk about some things we're afraid of and by the way, before we get to that, it is Halloween still

at Greenlight Studios. So, we got my man, Nate Collins, in here, my former college teammate, and, Chris randomly

hit me up and asked me, like, well is my favorite candy, and he was surprised to hear candy corn. And we share that, which, by the way, can get you canceled on Twitter. Candy corn? Yeah, like, when you talk about candy corn on Twitter, you would have think, I said I punch babies. That's how I feel about peeps. I love peeps.

People who do that about Peep's also. Now, you are all the way fucked up there. I feel like they're in the same category? Peeps fan. No, and not a candy corn fan. Okay. So, Nate was a former professional football player. great D Lyman and

also drives Uber in his spare time so I have a 4.93 rating we talked about that I have a 4.9 oh that's what I wanted to show you are you a 4.9 the driver rating so what oh so I'm a better rider than you are driver um I mean you have that celebrity

aspect so it's kind of a cheat code dude these dudes don't know who I am we are what our record says we are we are you are your record is that great I think it's because you talk to the passengers here this is for you you'll love this look how many trips and look at the compliments I got

and look at the number one thing that it says. Dude, you've had 2,320 trips. That is a lot of opportunities for positive reviews. So compliments is not a big deal to me. We're going to have him eating candy corn the entire time. What do you got? Two bags of candy corn? Yeah.

I'm kind of disappointed that you guys got the store brand, but it's all good. Well, store brand allows you to be a real soldier. That's about 400 grams of sugar. If you go into diabetic shock, this is like as good as a waiver. Nobody was harmed in the making of this segment. What I really want to talk about as Nate serenades us with the sound of him chomping on wax sugar,

tri-colored wax sugar in the background. Crokerbrew? I want to talk about our fears because it is Halloween. Makin, why don't you start it off? Okay. Crippling anxiety? Me too. Can that kill you?

Is high atop my lips? this for sure. It's a slower death, but yeah. That's a morbid one to start with. Yeah, okay. Soft bacon. No shit. If it's not crispy, I like that one. It's scary. Yeah, that scares me too a little bit. You want to jump in here? You want me to go

through my entire list? Keep good. Rapid fire. A tire not specified on an invitation. I curl up into a fetal position if you don't tell me what to wear to your function. To my like, anybody? Anybody. Anybody's function. You pretty much wear khakis and sparries everywhere.

This is a costume, okay? The word some assembly required. I'm fearful of that. I don't agree with that either. Inadequate sleep, big one, which dovetails with this one, adjacent hotel room noise. Oh, I fucking hate that. I walk into a hotel room and like I drop everything. I am silent.

And I'm just waiting to hear noise. Yeah. And if I hear noise, my next 24 to 48 is ruined. Are you knocking on their door? I can't do that. Oh, confrontation, another fear. No. I love it lately.

I'm into it lately. That will be on your not fearful of list. Teenagers. Fearful. And... Well, that's not our demo. 13 to 19. Yeah, well, like cool teenagers, I guess.

Yeah, but most aren't. Right, but the ones that are. Good to be a teenager in like 2001. You sort of look like Mr. Beast, so I would think that would otherwise. And teenagers love him. So you should just tell people you're Mr. Beast. Who's that? If you see teenagers, you should tell him, yeah, I'm Mr. Beast.

Who is that? They might like you. He's a famous YouTuber. We don't, we don't follow the trends. We set the trends. I don't give a fuck about Mr. Bees. I literally thought of YouTube Bees. Don't say that.

No, no, no, no. Sorry, we'll cut that. You made it sound like Mr. Beasts. is a cartel guy. Like if we talk bad about him, he's going to come and shut our YouTube channel down and kill us. No, but he has those ranges of ages that he's talking about that they're not a cartel, but they can be very annoying, probably. What's your next fear?

I thought you were talking about Mr. Belding. Foxes, I don't want to get into it. Cats, I'd also rather not get into it in mice. Foxes? Yeah, foxes. A lot of foxes and trolls. Yeah, I know. I know that.

All right, let me ask you a question. Noah's Ark situation. Are you getting on the Ark? Are you just going to try to swim it out? Arc. Even with mice. I got other, I got the cats on there.

I'll take care of the mice. But then you got the cats. Then I got bigger cats, which I'm cool with. Okay. Any other fears? No. Lunches. I hate being entrapped.

If somebody asks you to lunch, there's something coming. Yeah. Don't like going to lunch. Don't ask me to lunch. Don't like phone calls. Telephobic. You know this.

I'm also a bad texter. Yeah, you and I are currently missing a meal with just buddies. There can be fellowship meals. Yeah, those are our Friday fellowship meal. We're doing a pod. We got to feed the kids. I would also say the open ocean is scariest shit to me. Like, drop me in the open ocean, I'll drown myself.

I'm not even going to try to survive. Yeah. not going to do it why sharks as soon as it gets nighttime forget about like I was a kid that wouldn't swim in the deep end of the pool because there was a shark there perpetually I still go back to my parents' house which has a pool

and I jump in and I think about the 12 foot great white that's in the deep end you've always had a great imagination bro lately it's really good I'm also afraid of snakes Not my favorite. And then getting people's names wrong, really afraid to say some people's names.

Pronunciation or? Both. Pronunciation, but more so like calling Brenda or Cheryl like a Tiffany. Or we're calling a Jake, a John. Someone you've already met before. Yes. I'm afraid of that. But then I'm sure you are a, hey.

Hey, hey, bud. Guy, yeah. Hoss, buddy, all that shit. And I call some of my friends Hoss and Buddy so that I hedge

my bets. You see me call people I clearly know their name Buddy, so nobody can catch me when I'm doing it to somebody I'm not sure of. Also, deathly afraid of automation

and the robot apocalypse. Sex robots. Man, I just seen a video today. That's really scary. Sex robots video? No, like, like robot training and they're like beating over the head they're shooting it with a gun and then they'll put a person in front of it and it stopped shooting it's like struggling hey we're gonna cut that because i don't want to be the people that that the you know Elon musk comes up and kills first like black mirror style no no this is on instagram man yeah but robots watch youtube um generally i'm afraid of automation taking jobs truck driver jobs what would we do without

truck drivers who would scare us riding down the highway taking up you know the middle lane yeah but you also get the honk you get the honk and uh you think they'll let robots do that like they'll keep like the fun stuff like that i will be the fuck off the road if a robot is driving an 18 wheeler tesas i will get a fucking oregon trail style wagon and i will take the back roads you see those those are those are tipping over too you see we talked about that uh but let's talk about the things that people think we should be afraid of, because there are some things I can puff out my chest on. Me too. I'm going to go with, I mean, spiders is one that I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid of spiders at all.

See, I am not a tough guy. And for being not a tough guy, being able to deal with spiders is a nice lane for me. Yeah. Like I seem like I have everything together when I can relocate a spider when asked. That is like a big power move for you. Yeah. To make up for the fact that you're probably not going to win too many physical mortal combat. That's right. Can I hit you with a list here?

Yeah. Big grates on sidewalks and big cities. I'll walk over those. Is that something people are afraid of? Yeah. People walk around them. I will jump on those bad boys. Is it?

Bro, you can fall. I told you. Like one of my fears, the fields are just falling through the floor. get eaten by giant rats. It's not even that, first of all. Or the steam coming out that might be dukey steam. Whatever it is, bro. You just don't know where you're falling to.

That's right. Sundays. I haven't had Scaries since like 10th grade, not afraid. Oh, I'm afraid of Sundays. Give me Sundays. Howie Long. Intimidate some. Friend of mine.

Not afraid of him. Crawl spaces. Cool with crawl spaces. Death. Okay. And give you a little. little context. Virginia won the 2019 men's basketball national championship. Yeah. So it's all good now. Good time to bring it up. Yeah. We were there. Yeah. Got some

confetti. Yeah. It's all downhill from there. Got drunk with Charles Barkley. What about the football team? Yeah. That was even more important. On the come up. On the come up. How great would that be? That would be awesome. We could die twice. Yeah. That might be my list, Chris. Inacuracy. I'm fearful of. Yeah. What about spiders? No, I'm good with spiders. Okay. I brought a friend. Oh, man. Is that a live friend? Yeah, he's alive.

No, it's not. The thing about this spider is he's alive, and this is what's called a tarantula. Oh, okay. You know, like... That's a baby. It looks way bigger in person. No. It's big.

You just have big hands. So this is a tarantula. It's alive. I have a cricket here, which is part of their diet. If you've seen the new Brad Pitt Space movie, there were Space Babo. that came in and killed him. Like, I feel like I'm going to get killed by a space spider right now. I feel like this spider's going to crawl right up my...

I'm going to put the spider on my hand. You said you were good with spiders. I am good with spiders. Okay. And this cricket's alive, too. I don't want to lose him. But I think what I'll do is I'll let him sit in my hand. Hmm.

And I think I'll let the spider eat him out of my hand. Is that advisable? I'm fearful of... Guys in the back who actually knows shit about the animal king... them. Is that advisable? Fire away. Okay. I'm fearful of not signing waivers before doing stunts on podcasts.

Damn, he's got some big teeth. Waivers. Who signs wares? Come on, I got a... Wow, that thing's moving. Uh-huh. Oh. Just get the cricket off my fucking hand, just get the cricket off my hand. We'll feed them later. I'm more afraid of the cricket. I'm not afraid of the fucking spider. I'm afraid of the predation.

Oh, this is crazy. Come on, big boy. Don't be upset. He's been listening. He just jumps in my hand for this cricket. Yeah, why are holding the cricket? Is he gonna fucking bite me? What happens if a tarantula bites me?

What if this crickets is breaking? Just get on my hand, bro. You know what? I'm not afraid of death, so let's go. He doesn't look happy. Is it the front of the bed? Why is his ass moving? Or is that his front?

He's backing it up. I know. Like, you see that, right? Nate, take the cricket to my man. Oh, yeah, we should feed him so he's... Oh, we should feed him so get this... Oh! Get the cricket.

Get the cricket. This is a disaster. Come on, Megan. I'm afraid of crickets. I think the spider's afraid of me for the record. I'm just going to put my hand in here. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. That's 10 seconds with my fucking digits in a tarantula layer.

Is that proof that I don't care? Is it crawl? Huh? Is that proof that I don't care? Can you do 10 seconds? My hand in here? Yeah, your entire hand. What's gone?

No, I think it's up my leg. I didn't... Uh... Count, please. One Kalamazoo. I got like... Two Kalamazoo. What, that's your hands in there?

Yeah. Three Kalamazoo. I think it's spinning a web. Four Kalamazoo. Bro. Five Kalamazoo. I'm at... 13 seconds for the record. Okay, so I win. No, you don't win. I'm gonna put it on my fucking hand. I'm not losing to you

Maybe he'll bite me. Maybe he won't. We love the cricket. What's that thing on his butt? Is that a stinger? Why does he have two stingers? That's what I said. You see that right? Yeah, is that a stinger or? Probably a stinger. Oh, shit. I'm not afraid of him. I just respect him. You have gloves on, bro. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You want a glove? No, I take yours off. Come here, buddy. Google has like spiderproof gloves You're trying to get an endorsement?

Come on big boy He's just not that interested in me And this happens sometimes when you're handling spiders It's all about respecting the spider Where's Jack Hanna when you need them I actually hang out with Jack Hanna and Montana That sounds like a Riddell of sorts

Get on my pink ass hand What is that? Get on this pink hand Oh he's going He can hear me me he jumped spiders have ears come on big boy hop on just give me the cricket where's the fucking cricket i think it's up my pant leg you think so well oh up yep yep yep yep this is uh this is the way they behave when up he's on my finger hey i hear people in the back look he's just being him

just sizing you up yeah he's just feeling me he's got two of his legs they call him Pentacles. He's got two tentacles on me. For those people listening on Spotify and iTunes. I'll even look away. What's he doing? What's he doing right now? Why do you want to get two crickets?

I was born with six fingers in actuality, so I'm not worried about this on one of my hands. Which one? Fun fact. The right hand? You don't know which one's your right in. No, I was a baby. They cut it off right away.

Yeah, now you might know it. Okay, come on, buddy. Look, he's just not interested in me. I win. Yeah, but you have gloves on, bro. What's that mean? You can put him on my hand after he crawls on your hand.

Yeah, grab, yep. Oh, there goes the cricket, right in front of the hand. Oh, good, good, good, good. Grab that cricket. Put that fucker on my hand. He just can't go up my spacesuit. That's all. Oh, he's spinning a web.

We're seeing it. This is just like in nature. Look, he's outside the thing. Oh, fuck. Come on, I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid. I'm less afraid. I am the least afraid.

Oh. There you go. They're going to call this white boying on the internet. Come on. I was the first. Oh, look you got a stinger out! I just care about you! Oh.

Not afraid. Space suit. Not afraid. The fuck is he doing with his tentacles? All right, we're good. He doesn't need to spend that much time on me. We're good. I'm not doing there here.

So we did spiders. Room of Brave. Oh, yeah. Well, let's just put him back in his terranium. Candy corn? Let's name the guy. Candy corn, sir? What's the guy's name?

Tony Bennett. Wait, wait, wait. Oh, don't do him like that. Tony Bennett's scary to a lot of people. That Pac-Line dude? Fair. What do you want to name him? Are you serious?

Is it me? Or is it, what do you say? Google says mildly venomous? Well, it's necrotic poison Also, my driver explained that to me Last night as we were driving down the road And I was talking to somebody on the phone About this segment and my driver was like

There's actually a necrotic poison That you have to watch out for I said, well, mildly venomous It's not a black mamba I'm good But aren't we taught that spiders have eight legs? Those are teeth, bro They're teeth

Thank you for your service, sir Yo, I didn't eat the... Let's give you a cricket. If we can get him a cricket, he's had to listen to this pod for almost an hour now. I also brought something that might fucking just... I'm not even going to lie, bro.

This show is about facing your fears. All right? Now, neither of us like snakes, right? Right. I brought a snake. A little gardener snake All right Kelly You gotta get him off me in a second, okay?

What do I do, man? Stop yelling at the animals No, no, no, no, no Get him first, him first Okay, what are, why is it? He can't stay in the office. I don't, yeah! Okay, let's go, what's wrong?

Oh, I beat you! I'm good, bro. I'm good, bro. guy tried to bite I don't blame him so I win hands are up I'm good I'm good I'm fucking good man bring it back to pecko did it buy me no you got rude yeah yeah he's beautiful I really appreciate I I really respect the that species a lot of respect for that species I can smell him you see what I did because I I wasn't looking well you know we bonded it jumped

at me. What is my heart rate right now? People are diving out of the way. Hold on. One last look? Yeah, one last look. Just a last look. I'll pet him.

I'll pet him. I hate the way that fucking thing feels, man. I love you, though. I respect you. You're an animal. He's tense. Yeah, you guys are plenty. Yeah, he's all coiled up. And that's behavior when you see it in the wild that you got to watch out for. Is that right?

Yeah. that's uh gotta keep the grass cut that's exactly right that's what they always say right that was uh what next I think we could talk about

like sports or something we'll move on to the next thing I'd say we were we got a sea there yeah we'll do mice next week oh mice

this was enough mice bro a little disappointed in myself I thought I was going to actually hold the snake did you think you were I think you were I think I did

fuck no he didn't hold the snake the snake struck you that's yeah yeah we defang the snake someone finally said I didn't defang the snake I think PETA would be on our ass is PETA do snakes

they have to right you don't eat snakes oh what I guess some people do yeah Baca just on his on his podcast Derrills does it on the reg tune in for the Abaka cooked snake on the show. Like Indiana Jones?

Like you remember Temple of Doom? They had to cut up the and open the snake and then there were other snakes? I would think snake tastes like sausage. Like, you know, like the Italian sauces for like... I would think snake tastes like if a gator and I've eaten gator

salty. Lived in a sewer. First Google result. Pita.org. Five reasons never to buy a snake. I think they're out of the snake game. technically we didn't They are Can you show that CNN thing

You got that CNN thing There was a woman recently And I'm not, listen If you're a snake person Just go to the zoo Go to the zoo and come home Good gravy 140 snakes

Run me over With a fucking steamroller I'd rather die that way Drop me out of a 13,000 A thousand-foot building. Reincarnate me as William Wallace and gut me in front of a bunch of Scottish people. Drop me in the Ace Ventura shark tank

and let me get bitten half before I would die from a snake. No chance. Where the fuck were we? Pita, snakes. Shit I saw. Let's talk about some videos that we pulled up, that we've curated, that are Halloween edition. How about the first one, Mike?

You're going to have something to say about this. I already told my old lady, if we win, we're going down to Myrtle Beach for about 10 months, and we're getting a time share. And the whole nine yards, maybe a big boat, a couple boats, a lot of boats. And we're going to have a great time. Yeah, phenomenal performance by you. Thanks. All I want is a riding credit.

You did give me credit. The background is the offseason of one of those lowly Rams years. back here in Charlottesville, Virginia. Really, that's how I look, minus the stash, a lot. And I went to Lucky 7, which is a fixture here in Charlottesville, to snag. Might have been a six-pack, something festive. I see they're setting up.

Actually, I went for the lotto. In reality, I was trying to win the Powerball. That's right. So I go into buy the Powerball ticket. I see a news crew set up. So naturally, performers. and entertainers like us, we want to entertain. Yeah.

And I said, you know, I need to go home and get in costume. I need to get in character. I come home, I text you, I alert you. Phone call. And you, uh, you steered me in the right direction into that character development. Yeah. Were you the name?

Did you? No, name was you. Okay. Boats, me. Boats were you. A whole lot of boats. Yeah. Adam Carrecker, my roommate in Wisconsin

for our first, uh, training camp for the St. Louis Rams. Well, the reporter said to you live, what's your name? And I hadn't thought about it. So the first thing it came out of my mouth was Rod Carrecker. Yeah. Should have had a name ready. My wife drove me.

I don't know why I couldn't drive myself. But I had my wife find my leave. I said, babe, Meg, shout it to Meg. Find my Levi Garrett hat. I'm going to go shave a mustache. What's going on? I said, we need to go buy a lot of ticket. Wait, just you'll see when you get there.

And that little gem was born on. a February evening in about 2014. The next, because I love dressing up. And you had them fooled, by the way. I had them fooled. They put Chris Long on a Chiron, one of your favorite Chirons here. Words.

After it had gotten back to the studio. You had the reporter for me. Oh yeah, for sure. The reporter was hookline and sinker. She thought I was a nice man from maybe Rockbridge County. You know? Yeah. Hell of a performance by you.

Great performance. Let me grab some candy corn here. I also dressed up, though, before, I love dressing up. And when I was in New England, one of my favorite guys to bust balls with was Julian Edelman. I came as Julian Edelman to Halloween. Sorry, I got so much candy corn. It's so good. So filling.

I got this really high-quality mask. $600. Porcelain. Creepiest bucks. Like, what's the movie where the laws don't exist anymore? The Blues Brothers. The Purge? The Purge.

I looked like one of those purge people. I came to work. I actually freaked a lot of my teammates out. Do you have that media? That's why he gets me the rock when it matters. Do you feel like you're playing bigger this year? Yeah, you know, I lifted a lot. You know, I spent my last season in Muscle Beach.

I did a lot of sit-ups in the park and you can see it when I'm blocking you know I move people I do everything Excuse me So Jules took that well That was his locker

That was his Kent State shirt Everybody loved that That costume Bill even loved it Bill left his ass off I actually got Bill to smile and laugh And then I busted it out again For the Super Bowl

And this was on the bus We were already drunk It was 9 a.m. in Foxborough me and Devin McCordy. Shout out to Dev. Roll that tape. What's up, Bubbs? Hey, bro. Hey, that catch you had, though, bro. Yeah, I'm the new David Tyree.

That was game saving, bro. Yeah, sports science said I... I'm so elite, man. Sports science said I clutch the ball as fast as an eagle flaps his wings, bud. Damn! Yeah, I'm elite. I'm elite, boss. Oh, elite. Tom Brady's nothing without you, bro. He's nothing without me, bubs. He needs me.

That's why I'm gonna be on duck boat one on the parade, bubs. Come find me. And I got a pump-up shop On my duck boat So yeah That was me as Jules for the parade I got just shit can that day That's right Beautiful day in Foxborough

A great parade they know how to do it They have a lot of practice Narrow streets Freezing rain And the best thing about a Super Bowl Is the parade I'm just telling you like And getting drunk in the cold is great anyways

But doing that was like A million plus people cheering you on, your ego is full. What parade was better? Philly because they'd waited. But Boston knew how to put one on. So for me, like Boston, they've done this before. I loved it. It was my first one.

I wore the mask. I did the Rolls-Royce emblem pose on the front of a duck boat. They apprehended me. They said, you got to... Bobblehead 1A. That's from Philly. And I dropped the mask. It's out there in Boston somewhere.

Somebody has it. Please. If you have the mask, I'll put out a nominal award. No, you don't want to go nominal. What's the word there? A big all reward. A big ass award. Yeah.

Reward. There's also a lot of people because of that bobblehead that you mentioned. Why would you give a big reward to get the mask back? Well, not bigger than the value of the mask. So I don't want to go. Then, yes, nominal. Yeah, nominal. Okay.

Maybe like. I don't think you're going to see the mask. Maybe a Spirit Airlines ticket to Charlottesville. Yeah. We take you out to one of our more budget wine country attractions. Yeah. Because there are some good ones here that are pricey. If I had this mask, I would not be giving it back.

Just say it. Just sell it on eBay. Anyways, that little get up there has done pretty well for me. I ordered it last minute from a costume shop in Philly after we won the Super Bowl. Didn't want to curse our Super Bowl chances by ordering a fur coat beforehand. I was thinking Game of Thrones. And then AI, name drop, bad news, Virginia, friend of Marcus Hagan's, friend of the program. The answer sent me a jersey right in time, hit the streets for an epic parade.

And people have been dressing up as me, adults, women, children. I got this text yesterday from some of my buddies in Philly. I was supposed to remember the kid's name. I do not remember the kid's name, but I love this kid. That's commitment. And that's what I looked like when I finished the parade. This is the first person that actually did the costume right because that baby is sort of immobile.

Yeah. Milk drunk. Baby doesn't know what's going on. That's how I was after the parade. Shout out to the Philly police who gave me a ride home in the back of the car. Usually I don't want to be in the back of a police car, but they were gracious enough to bring me home. That was a beautiful day.

in Philly. And talk in chalk media, as you see this beautiful woodwork behind me,

is how we're going to close out most of our shows. We're going to talk about my new show Fish Bowl. Have you enjoyed it so far? Hell yeah.

Have you even watched? Yes. Less decisive. I have. Okay. I loved it. Okay, good. You have to go.

That feels good. We have AD. We had Primo. This week we have Kirstie Ennis, a warrior lost her leg serve in our country first woman above the knee amputee

to summit Kilimanjaro a 19,340 foot mountain on our conquering kille campaign and she was awesome to work with had her sit down with me for the fishbowl we went from

Nauzad straight to Camp Bastion which is a British air base out in Afghanistan and I was there very briefly I had two doctors pass me up they looked at me and said there's not a chance and they kept walking

A lot of chance you're going to make it Yeah, they decided that my head trauma. They just didn't think that. Did they explain to you what happened up here, you know, with your brain movement? Were they able to give you some prognosis on that, like, relatively quickly? Or was their downtime? No. It was more like, so I'm actually good friends with one of them now.

And it took a lot for him to walk up to me and say, I'm sorry, basically. But he just looked at me and was like, okay, I had these other people here. I can treat a blown up leg. you know, I can cauterize that and clean it up, but I can't treat what she has going on. And I had fractures in my C2, C3, and C4, so they couldn't like turn my head to do a bunch of stuff with. And these are makeshift hospitals, you know, they're tents in the middle of Afghanistan. But I got really lucky. There was a British plastic surgeon that was actually volunteering her time out there.

And she then came up and was like, you know what, you can sew up everything else, but don't touch her face. Like, I'm fixing that. Yeah. She did a nice job. Thank you. I mean, if a Corman did it, it would definitely be like... If a Corman, as much as you love Corman, it's just like, it's just like, it's just not their thing. No.

Was there a moment when they're passing you up that you're like, am I going to die? I mean, is this it or... Well, I honestly thought I was going to die because, like, going through my head and the whole helicopter ride back over, I just thought, like, I'm not dying without saying my little sister. So I can't wait for you to see that. Please watch the interview, like, subscribe. Kirsty really opened up. And she always impresses me because she's not just a badass.

She's a really tender person as well. She's great with kids. She always has an intentional message or a cause when she climbs these mountains. She's on Achencagua. She talks about that. But her recovery was just amazing. And her perspective is always amazing. Whenever I'm having a bad day, I think about Kirstie.

And she made the point that whenever she's having a bad day, she thinks about somebody who's overcoming a bigger challenge than her. her. And that is pretty beautiful perspective. She's wonderful. Pat Tillman Award winner. Check out the interview and join us again on Tuesday if we don't get fired for Greenlight. Have a good weekend and shout out Alan Ruck. And take care, y'all. Y'all take care. All right. So it's a hard day's work in the books. What did I fuck up, Meg? Well, you brought about a half dozen people into this room and you said that this particular spider was not venomous turns out mildly venomous well necrotic flesh eating capabilities are not venomous spiders can hear by the way but don't have

ears as you alleged arachnids hear through hairs on their legs so you got a good feel for things nice and last but not least NASA headquarters technically in Washington, D.C. So not Cape Canaveral? That's right. I always thought it was the headquarters. I think they have a setup in Houston as well, as you'll remember from the Open. Oh, from Apollo 12.

You trying to con me? That'll do it for today's fact check. Thank you. I didn't fuck up too much. Day after Halloween, not bad. See you all next week.