Green Light with Chris Long - Stanford Steve! Bills vs Rams, NFL Division Winners & Award Predictions & WK1 Best Bets.

Episode Date: September 9, 2022

(2:13) - Bills Blow Out SB Defending Champion Rams. (10:30) - Thursday Night Time Machine. (11:04) - Rest In Peace Queen Elizabeth. (28:55) - Housekeeping: Chris’ Softball Struggles, Tommy Alter’s Fantasy Football League & Tim Brando’s Booth Presence. (45:35) - Revisiting Macon’s Chips Take. (55:53) - Stanford Steve on Chris and Macon’s Thursday Night Time Machine, NFL WK1 Best Bets, Predicting NFL Awards and Division Winners. (1:40:29) - Ricky Gervais’ Pick 3 Version 2. (1:50:45) - Macon’s First Foray with Alive or Dead. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light Tube YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/GreenLightTube1 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. https://www.greenlightpodcast.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Tennessee, y'all, too. 1-800-9-9-7-89. Welcome to the Greenlight podcast. NFL week one kicks off this weekend. Chris Makin, Stanford Steve are rolling through their week one best bets, and a couple predictions on division and award winners from the fellas. We're going to kick the show off with a Thursday night recap, a little Thursday night time machine right after.

We roll through a housekeeping, and then roll into our NFL week one with Stanford Steve. Previews, bets, and game predictions. Then we've got another Ricky Jervais pick three, and then a little alive or dead action. y'all take care enjoy the show enjoy week one all right so it's 11 15 p.m

the game just wrapped up you're going to enjoy the pod today you're going to hear Thursday night time machine you're going to hear what making it and I said I feel like there was stuff I was right about and there was stuff I was very wrong about tonight I don't think I saw this ass kicking coming I'll just say that

the bills are incredible their offense looks great I mean a lot of people worried about Brian Dable We talked about that today on the pod. We've talked about Ken Dorsey and how this transition is probably going to be pretty seamless because of Josh Allen's input, Ken Dorsey's experience, the way they kept the language kind of the same. I saw Greg Olson tweet about an unfortunate turn of events for Seahawks fans in 2020 or 2021, whatever it was. Russ hit up Greg Olson for his input on who they should hire as the O.C.

and Greg Olson said, you should hire Ken Dorsey. They interviewed Ken. They didn't hire him. So if you're a Seattle, Seahawks fan, it's probably a little bit of a twisting of the knife here. But Ken Dorsey called a great game. The way I look at the Bill's offense this year is, it's way more death by a thousand paper cuts,

or at least that's what they were willing to do tonight. They took what the defense gave them. You know, they attacked zone and soft spots. The run game look really good. A lot of pullers, a lot of gap scheme. Aaron Kromer's paying off. We've talked about him. I mean, this offense looks way more capable and calm this year.

I know there were a bunch of turnovers tonight. One throw Josh probably once back. But he completed like the first 20 balls. I think there was some sort of a prop bet for him completing 30 passes. And the odds were like plus 7,500. Somebody was tweeting about it. And at half, I think he had almost 20 completions. He finished 26 of 31, 2.97, 3 touchdowns, 2 picks.

So, I mean, it was death by 1,000 paper cuts for the bills. And then, you know, in the second half, Josh rolls right and pulls out the fucking samurai sword. So they can still kill you with that because they've got digs. They've got Josh's big arm. They've got the explosiveness. But it's going to be a lot of dinkin and dunkin. And it's got to feel hopeless to be on D-Ly. and watch Josh Allen pick you apart like that.

And for a D-line that misses Von Miller in L.A., it really sucks that it compounded tonight and he actually hurt your offensive line. And that offensive line is going to be something that holds the Rams back this year. I'm not going to say, you know, I'm not going to draw any big conclusions because last year with the Rams,

Stafford didn't look healthy midway through the season. They were really bad. There was a time where I think I wrote them off last year a little bit. And I'm not going to do that with them this year. but that offensive line is going to be a problem for them. They're going to be calling Andrew Whitworth, but there's nothing better for a retired soul than watching. The team that you just retired from look like they're having problems.

So that makes it harder to make that call and say, hey, Big Witt, come back to the Rams, man. Like, we got it going on. Like, you come back when you have FOMO. You don't come back to join this team. Not until they got it figured out. If you're Andrew Whitworth, you sit at home for a month and see who's got it figured out if you're really thinking about playing.

The one guy that's probably, you know, that had a tough day for the bills is the guy was wondering about all preseason long. What's James Cook's role going to look like? Well, he got the ball. His very first carry ends in a fumble. So he might be sitting down for a little bit. You know, I always talk about when Miles Sanders fumbled the ball a bunch for the Eagles his rookie year. He got a bunch of chances. I think we'll see how much the bills trust him

and how much they give him the ball and how he takes care of the ball. So tough for him to cough up the pill that early. You know, the bill's D line is so deep. They're so good. They come in waves and they wore the offensive line for the Rams down. I mean, no boom. They were singing his praises because he ran Vaughn Miller by Matt Stafford early in the game. And the very next play you get the stutter in the bolt, which is a beautiful rush later on in the game, Von Miller with whether you call it a dip move, a ghost technique, whatever the fuck it is, there shouldn't be a name for what he did on his second sack because it's so rarely duplicated. There are so very few guys who can do that.

If I tried to do that right now, I'd have to go see my chiropractor. You're more likely to get hurt as an NFL defensive end trying that move than you are actually winning a rush. and there's very few guys that can do it. Von Miller is one of them, and he's in his 30s doing it. So amazing to see him have some juice picking up right where he left off.

I mean, that's a big, big tool. We talked about the bills. They had this reputation of being deep, of being young, but they had no home run hitter, and now they have the home run hitter. The home run hitter makes everybody better. And so the bill's defense looked good. The young corners took care of business night.

Dane Jackson had a nice play. But nice segue, to the biggest concern for the Rams right now, because you can work around an offensive line. The biggest concern for the Rams right now is Matthew Stafford and his help. Balls were sailing on him. I mean, towards the end of the game, he threw a ball right at Greg Rousseau.

Second and 10 early in the game, the announcer said, well, he got hit and they were caping for him a little bit. They caped for him on the interception. But he was throwing a couple really dangerous balls tonight, and they paid for it. And they, had some turnover luck of their own four turnovers the rams were beneficiaries of and they end up with 10 points so not a good night for for the rams where the hell is alan robinson where the hell

is cam makers i mean robinson had two targets um 12 yards or something like that um he was on the milk box dude he was missing and to think you could escape chicago and you're thinking because i've been there oh i've escaped you know i can't wait to get to my new team and be on the west coast we're going to be good, wrong, week one at least. I'm going to get a bunch of targets. Cooper Cup is going to draw double teams, and I'm going to get the ball a bunch wrong at least week one. So that's tough for him. Acres didn't get a lot of snaps. Yeah, if you want to bank on Colin Whitworth, don't hold your breath because I think he's going to have to see a little bit more evidence before he comes back to work. That dude's probably living life right now. This is the most fun you'll

have as a retired football player is your first couple months out. You're like, oh, watching the game is kind of fun. You're going to need more than that to get Andrew Whitworth back. But again, Aaron Kromer at the Bill's run game, death by 1,000 paper cuts, man, it's scary to think they can do that. And one more thing, Jalen Ramsey had a tough night. His eyes were in the backfield on that touchdown to Diggs late. And they went at him. You know, Josh Allen seems to go at his teams. 11 touchdown, 70% completion rate, 6.3 yards per carry, barely in interceptions in the three games that he's played Jalen Ramsey teams three.

And now I'm not saying that that has, you know, that that's specifically about Jalen Ramsey, but this guy plays well when he plays Jalen Ramsey. And Cooper Cup is fucking amazing. I mean, incredible. Big statement night for him. especially after a year where people thought, and rightfully so, like maybe we should take this year with a grain of salt.

He's great, but has he put together multiple years like this? People were talking about the Hall of Fame. I want to come out here and show that you can consistently put up numbers like this, you can pick up where you left off. He does this for a few more years. He'll be in that conversation. So, hey, anything can happen with the Rams we saw last year,

but I'll tell you this, the bills look really fucking good, really good and they've worked on their weaknesses all right enjoy the pod got a surprise for you we got to start with Thursday night time machine okay fortunately for you I'm not feeling good about this week

I'm not feeling I'm not in a Thursday night groove whatsoever how can you be in a Thursday night groove football is back no last last year last year week one I was like okay this is gonna be I went I started like 7 and 0 or something like that I feel like you said to me last week and I'm seeing the board

And I'm seeing, I feel like I'm seeing the board on this one. I don't know though. Los Angeles Rams 28 Buffalo Bills 23. Oh my goodness. 3129 Rams. Wow. All right. So we walked in this morning.

We had a new studio. It was downstairs. It's still downstairs. It's beautiful. We're sitting in it. It's got gorgeous gray paint on the walls. Pepper corn paint. Pepper corn.

It's way different. We've been on the third floor for three or four years, something like that. and, you know, like podcasting down here kind of feels like, I don't know, what was the movie I was talking about earlier? Wayne's World where they changed sets or like when Deezis and Mero changed sets, it's like, fuck, man, are things going to be the same? And we started podcasting earlier and it felt like things would never be the same for seven minutes. We did seven minutes of an open that I absolutely hated and everybody else liked it, but something about it was throwing me off.

So I just, I did the high maintenance talent thing. And I told everybody to get up and move a table and flip the chairs around. And now everybody's like, fuck, uncomfortable because they're like, as Chris just, is he whacked out? But I think our energy was zapped because we were too close to each other. We were on opposite sides of what we've been up the last three, four years. Yeah, I don't think it was a high maintenance move at all. I do think the content of the open was an A-minus.

Is your chair shaking like mine? is right now? A little bit because there's a unit outside, but that's not a big deal. You don't like that side. Is there bad Feng Shui on that side? I just flipped from that side. The reason I wanted to restart the open, and we can talk more about Studio J. South, is that the queen is dead.

Nah, she's not. She just died. No. So in the original open, we did this whole thing, like, what if the queen dies? I was like, it's a good thing. Nick Castellanos isn't, he's out with an oblique. Like, it's a good sign. they play the Marlins tonight.

You know, I thought we'd have to interrupt an A-B, but he was hurt, so I thought she might make it another 10 days. We were talking about Prince, whatever the fuck his name is. King Charles. King Charles now, like a dog. Well, don't they need to have a ceremony first? He's like a small dog. He's like King Elect at the moment.

This, this, uh, damn. Yeah. R-I-P. Yeah, R-I-P, indeed. I know nothing about her, but because of the way everybody else is talking about her. I will pretend I'm really upset about it. Like, do I talk about the corgis now again or not? Talk about the corgis.

Okay. She made the decision in about the year 2012 to stop breeding her corgis because she didn't want any of her corgis to outlive her, which is just a wild move. But when she was alive five minutes ago, it felt a lot easier to talk about. Right now it's fucking hard. Because those little corgis, they don't have a queen.

I was making fun of that decision. and now it feels disrespectful. No, it's not disrespectful. The woman lived, she ruled England and lived to, what, 90 years old? I mean, that's pretty sick. That's a sick life. You know, when very old people die,

you know, like people online are like, God damn it! Queen Elizabeth died! She was 96. Why? Dude, she was old. She was old. Willie Nelson dies, I'll be really sad.

This will be, you know how you British people are? That's how I'll be when Willie Nelson dies. But I'm not going to make it a big, like, you know. It's even more sad for the old folks because we have so many more memories with them. I don't remember anything from Queen Elizabeth. No offense

to her. You know, a four-year-old dies and it's like, well. Oh, my God. I think, well, hey, you know, holy shit. It wasn't a high school graduation. Yeah, I walk across the stage. both Queen Elizabeth. Queen Elizabeth.

I mean, we've had four seasons of the crown. For Christ's sake. And her son is not that popular, so the British people might be a little upset that they have a new king who's kind of a douche. So are they going to be like, oh, whatever, when he dies, you know? Like, people are real selective

about their mourning, you know, like... Yeah, I think they are fired up for Prince William, though. And Matt made a great point. King Charles, Cavalier. He's a lot like my career arc. Like, he just was like, like waiting to win for a long time. And then finally, like he gets to be, you know, play for New England and Philly.

And you're old and washed up. Like, it's like, it's kind of fun, but it's like, fuck, dude. Yeah, he's going to be 75. And he's going to get to be king. And he's going to be like, oh, this is going to be a great four years. Yeah, but they painted pictures of you on walls and stuff. I know, but they're not going to do it with this guy. Nah, they're waiting for William.

Yeah. I just, you know, like, I feel bad for it. Well, I don't know anything about him. He might be a bad guy. Uh, I mean, he's no Prince Andrew, you know, which is to say, you let's go through this. Prince Andrew. Allegedly, bad guy, not in the line of succession.

What did he do? He like sexually assaults. He was involved with Epstein. He's been excommunicated from the throne. Yeah, that sort of stuff. They're tougher on their world leaders over there, huh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So leaders, you know, use that lightly.

I don't know. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, really. Well, so I was going through like after King Charles Cavalier, we are going to have not the Redhead because he was like me, Nicolode and Gal were out. Yeah, even more so than that, he's younger than his brother. Yeah, and his brother who, his brother could die.

Right, then it would go to his son, not his younger brother. Like, is it like at a sports book, you know, the Falcons, like buying a Falcons future to win the Super Bowl is like buying a Prince Harry future is. I don't know how we get to Prince Harry. It'd be hard because the little. little prince like William's son would have to die as well. George or one of them would have to, uh, uh, what's it called when you say, nah, no thanks. Abdicate when you abdicate the throne, look at you.

Nice. That maybe could come into play. If, if young prince George was still a minor or something, not a straight line, but I can draw a pretty straight line from Prince Harry. I would say it's Falcons to win like three Super Bowls in a row. Yeah. And with my God, that would hurt the book. And with the whole.

hurt and with the whole I live in L.A. Yeah, yeah, that's tough. But you could never go back to London if you live. Well, no. And if he was born before his brother, he would probably have stuck with it. But basically, RIP to the Queen for sure. Yeah. Like big RIP. Don't know anything about her, but I'm being really like cool about this. Yeah. Because, you know, like, I don't really get up here and eulogize people.

She's pretty awesome. She had a great. She had a hat. She's like, keep people, like, he goes so far back. She was keeping citizens. calm during World War II during the bombings of England. Damn, dude, I probably shouldn't talk lightly about her. Yeah. She's great. She was great. She is great.

She'll always be great. RIP to the Queen. And happy birthday to the Queen. Mina Combs. You motherfucker. I did that in the first open. You are just such a motherfucker, dude. And that's good.

I thought we were TV. We are, but that's good. But you know birthdays are a competitive thing around here. That's true. That's true. You know? But I'd like for a second time to wish a happy birthday to me in a comms. That's August, September 8th. I don't know which way is up.

The queen died. I'm numb. The floor is shaking. The floor is shaking. We're on a, we're on the second floor. Like the world is upside down. Since we literally, between the time that I moved the furniture and the furniture found its final resting place, so did the queen. Wow. Yes. So like, I don't know what else is going to happen, but pay attention. Memento. Mori. Remember when you came back the other day and you were like, I have a new saying. Remember, that's the first word of that, yeah. Because, wow, you killed the queen. Look.

Death is a part of life. Kingston just, because he might have killed the queen. I didn't kill the queen. It's a reminder that everything does die. Yeah, it's true. None of us are in control of anything. It's true. Maybe a good day to talk about our mortality, you know?

just everybody. It might be cathartic to talk about it because we've all been touched by the passing of this monarch. Have you? Yes, I have. Dude, the inside of my jacket is it's the fucking Big Ben. Okay, let's do this. I'm bloody conflicted today. Big Ben one. Okay. NFL's back, but the queen died. Tower of London, too, right?

What? Hit me with a little A-B, A-B, anything London. anything yeah anything who me wembley wimley wimley stadium yeah that's right okay yeah all right uh buckingham palace sporty spice david beckham oh now we're talking yeah werewolves very good very good uh beef eaters well jen very good yeah is it not jen no it is not very good No. Well, beef eaters are also the cats who stand guard. Oh, okay. Fuck. I was going to use that next. So now I got to think about it for a second. And if they're not. A double-decker buses. And it's very good. If they're not, I take that back.

Okay. Oh, there's a restaurant called rules. Rules. Okay. McDonald's. Okay. God, I'm going to lose on a London thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're going to lose. The Thames. The River Thames. Oh, the River Thames. Yeah, spell it. T-H-Y-M-E-S. Sir. Is there,

it's not times like the herb. It's definitely not spelled like Tim's. Correct. But we still could be here a while. Yeah, we could. But I have to go again. And that's why I'm going to go with Heathrow. Wow.

You're really doing well. Yeah. How are you doing this? You're just thinking about transportation? Okay. Fish and chips. Piccadilly Square. Piccadilly Circus

Whatever the fuck it is That's a point Ty? You want to agree to Ty? No wait Piccadilly Circus I bet you there's Piccadilly Square guys Yeah Piccadilly Square Piccadilly Square Piccadilly is known for

Piccadilly Circus has to be the most famous Road intersection of the world also known as Piccadilly Square It's iconic for several reasons I made that up I made that up Winchester Virginia I made that of

Yeah, but Piccadilly Circus, you got it. That's where all the shops are. Okay, okay, we'll give you credit. Tower of London. What do you mean, no? Why are you shaking your head? Didn't it fall down? The Tower of London?

No. Tower of London's still there. It's way there. Did you even know the Queen? Mate. Oh, what else? Me? Fire bombing.

Hate it. Not into it. Prime Minister. 10 Downing Street. Nice. Thanks. And I got another one in the queue. So, yeah, so do I. Okay.

No problem. No problem. London Bridge. That's what was falling down in that. That's what was like a parable. You've. Perible. It's in London Tower of Terror.

It's like a Tower of Terror. That's from the, that's from Orlando, Florida. Yeah. studios. Oh, I love London, man. What a city. Yep. What a city.

You want to end it there in a tie? You want to keep going and roll the dice? Because I got a banger. Oh, you do? Yeah. Oh, actually, bangers. So do I. No, no, literally bangers.

That's my bangers. Bangers. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That's good. I think people at home are like, what? Like, fuck this. We get it.

The queen died. you know how I feel. Love actually to the queen and her entire family. Love to her and best of luck to King Charles Cavalier. Yeah. And I'm still, I'm still not certain if he's actually king yet. I think we have to have the ceremony.

No, he's king now. King Charles the third. It's automatic. No coronation. The body is still warm, sir. We don't have a coronation ceremony? There will be one.

Okay, but he's automatically king. Take this with a great assault. He thought the London Bridge. was still standing. Good point. Like do we put a crown on them like immediately or do we wait on that for the ceremony? Yeah, you don't put the crown on it. I guess still grieving.

We haven't seen this in our lifetimes. Yeah. No, this is a big deal. Yeah. It's a lot of instability. You know, she was in the war room with her gloves in her hat like, drop the bomb here. What do they do without that leadership now? Unfortunately, we have it with Charles.

to get jumped by some football fans like outside like fucking a shout out to uh green street hooligans camille whatever the hell her name is camilla parker bowls yeah first lady oh yeah good for her she won't be queen though she'll be queen consort it's different well he knows right our guy philip wasn't right wasn't king you know yeah okay so damn it she was too young it's unfair when you think about it it's fucking unfair dude how old was she 96 96 fuck me dude couldn't live to it's a tragedy well look i don't know if i can watch football tonight NFL needs to read the room you know they talk about read the room on part of my take the NFL needs to read the room and shut the games down the pGA tour or the dp world tour actually

just they stopped playing golf. The DP World Tour? That's right. The BMW Championship. I think you gotta pay like five bucks a month to watch that DP World Tour. I see that advertise on the sidebar. DP World Tour. Oh, man.

You don't, the first rule of the DP World Tour is don't touch anybody else's ball. Cowboy, are you a tour guy? Tour? Over PGA? No, how you pronounce it. Tour. Tour. Okay.

Tour. I've met, I've met some of you. Yeah. Yeah, my wife, big tournament. Well, I know, but are you still tournament. You're still tournament, though, right? Tournament. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't know you got the tour there. Tour. Tour. In many ways, it's more difficult to lose a 96-year-old than it is to lose a four-year-old. Because we've accumulated. so many memories with the 96 year old. There have been four or five seasons of the crown.

Oh, you're saying it's easier. I was going to say, no, it's pretty easy for them to die. Like when you get to 96, things don't work. Yeah, I'm saying it's harder on us. Yeah, it's harder on us. The one she's left behind. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't see it that way. I don't see it that way. You know, I would, I would, any four-year-old in London,

I'd keep that person. She's had 96 years. time to abdicate to the upper room yeah no yeah no i want the four-year-old to live too yeah i just wanted the queen to also live big live guy why can't everybody live uh resources okay checkpoint rowback active wear best way to describe rowback is best fit best feel when it comes to quality rowback just blows it out of the park every time first First, rowback's new performance hoodies are a total game changer. Maybe the softest, stretchiest hoodies in the game.

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argument from Dirty Nellies all the way to my house in the back of Stanford Steve's car. Wasn't that because Steve revealed that he was a Duke fan? No, it was because we were going through some infighting at that point. So you and I were hashing it out in the back. We were doing our contract. Remember that contract? I don't get to talk about your second job. That was, and I said I would like the terms of the contract to include that if I don't get to talk

about your second job, you don't get to complain about having two jobs. You're welcome to talk about my first job. We then park the car. You just can't talk about how, you know, like this, this, because that takes away from this, because that, for better or worse. We're, I don't wanna, I don't wanna breach the contract.

Okay. But we get to the, we get to the door. You turn the ignition off. It's the last thing we've been doing is arguing and making goes. And one more thing. I want my name on the podcast. And you thought I was being serious. Oh, for like a month.

Oh, yeah. That's funny. That's funny. Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Steve's going to be on soon. We can ask him if he thought you were serious. I didn't.

Okay. Okay. All right. But anyways, Queens dead. RIP. We've got a new studio. We're going to have Stanford Steve on to talk about the NFL. We're going to talk about Thursday night time machine.

We'll build up a little. Intrigue. We're going to pick our division winners. We're going to pick our our Super Bowl winner, our MVP, Coach of the year, all that shit. Here's housekeeping for me. Okay, I've had a terrible fucking week. It's finally turning around right now as we speak, because we're getting into it and we're podcasting. Yeah. But a few things happen to me this week. Number one, softball was terrible. I let my team down. I was really bad. Last week, like I talked about, I hit what should have been an inside the park home run. Should have been a walk off. Instead, I scored the winning run because I wore chucks to the game and I slipped on second base. So all my teammates were like busting my balls about shoes.

Come to find out, it's like a real thing. Like people want you in cleats there. So I went to play it against sports or I had somebody go to play it again sports. I wasn't going to call you on that. You could have gotten away with it. Well, I had a rebuttal. Go ahead and do your thing. No, I wasn't going to. No, no, by all means. I sent my assistant. Yeah. I didn't have time to go myself. And you were going to say, oh, you don't have time. I don't have time.

And I was going to say, you're in the league and you don't even go to the fucking games. And you're going to give me shit about not having time to go to play it against sports. I got proof. Run the tape back. You said my team.

It's our team. I'm on the team. No, you're not on the fucking team. By the way. Here's what would help. Make the joke the first time. Don't just like make me stop in my tracks and gaslight me and tell me you weren't going to make the joke

that I knew you were going to make. This guy. You're the gaslight king, dude. You're in a gaslighty mood today. This guy. And you know what? It's okay. We reunite.

He tells me to stop driving us into cul-de-sacs, and I just let you go on with your story instead of stopping it dead in its tracks. And then I can't do anything right. No, I would have appreciated that joke. It would have been funny. I sent my assistant to get the cleats because I have disposable income and a very busy schedule. Not busier than you because you can't show up to the games. Can't be bothered to come to the softball games.

Newborn. Oh, Newborn. Yeah, I got it. Um, that actually is a good Trump card. Uh, but I, I get the cleats. I'm all excited because I have two pairs of spikes. They're definitely one of them's going to fit. I get to the, to the ballpark and, uh, I get out.

I'm like, hey guys, they have cleats. And they're all like, ah, because you're not allowed to have spikes. So that fucking sent me into a downward spiral. And I was mentally weak. Like something like that when I played pro football would have never bothered me because I was like, I was a professional athlete. Now I'm mentally weak. I'm like putty.

So I just downward spiraled Downward spiraled I get up there the first time First at bat And there's a guy in baseball pants out there And it's throwing me off And he's thrown a really A really flat pitch

And I'm out in front of it And I'm popping things up and I end up going read I end up going 0 in 3 or 0 and 4 One of the two It depends on how you you count errors Did you hit? None bro Ah so zero for the season

Yeah we're on pace for you to be right How many How many homers do you think he might have hit Going 0 for 4 that's pretty good all right uh now did the team win welcome to my world it's a triangle of hatred now

did the team win yeah we won okay but it was really hard to I mean I let my team down they moved me into the three hole after my big night the first night and like you know you just it sounded a little bit like a me guy not a team guy team one isn't that what matters it is what matters but I'm also you know it's just

a regular season game. I've moved on to the next one. I want to get better. And so I don't know. I just let the team down. I feel bad about it. Yeah. You know, I saw the clip that you posted for accountability's sake. That was, that was, that was good on you. You just got to let the ball travel travel to you. This guy was, I mean, he had baseball pants on. It just didn't have my best night. Dude, he had goggles and baseball pants. And what were his shoes? Cleats. What? Yeah, but not spikes. Okay. Yeah, did you miss that part? The rubber? You can do rubber.

In athletics, they have two different types of cleats. They have, like, rubber, and they have the metal. So I have metal spikes, and that's why I wasn't allowed to wear them. So terrible night at softball. Did Coach Fabio let you play a different position? And how'd the arm hold up? The arm was terrible. And I didn't want to make any excuse.

But thank you, Matt, for the Aleoup. Thank you very much. It was the arm's fault. And I was in left field, and I threw through it. I was afraid to ask for like a respite. You know, I didn't want to show up and be like, hey, I'm the guy that gets the fucking, you know. Especially with the wrong cleats. Right.

And because I feel like everybody would be like, oh, this guy's a podcaster. He thinks he can do whatever the fuck he wants. And that's not true. And some of them heard the pod, you know. So it's a little awkward. You know, we were hyping it up. And then I was terrible. So bad week.

And fucking fantasy football. And I need your ruling on this. make. I purposefully didn't tell you till now. I'm in a, you know Tommy Alter, our friend. Yeah. He invited me into a fantasy football league and there's a couple NBA guys in it. I don't know who's in it just for background. So I really want to make sure I don't suck, right? You don't want to be in the NBA guys fantasy league and suck. And Mina's in this league as well. And I'd be happy to help. Well, last week I asked when the draft was and he said, said next Wednesday. I said, what time? He said 615. Okay. No. Here's the deal. I'm busy,

right? Don't have time to go to play it again, sports. Barely have time to do this draft. I get home. I fire up my computer at 6.07. I'm in the lobby early and I see that it's the fourth round. No. Yeah, my draft is populating. So the draft started at 6. So I text Tommy Alter, who's a terrible commissioner and should be impeached. And he said there were emails. I said, what did you say in the text message? He said 615, but that changed. It was in your email. I don't know, I don't know where you rule on this. I'm the first one to admit that I'm a disorganized motherfucker. But when you text me 615, that's what I'm being coached to do. I'm being coached to show up at 615. And I, and I log in and they draft, the computer drafted A.J. Dillon in the

fourth or fifth round. I mean, that, that's the danger inviting people. You don't know terribly well to your fantasy. Right. He should know I don't do email because that's what I told him. I don't do email. I mean, especially if you said that, there you go. That's the ruling. He's in the wrong. You're not. Well, I didn't say that before he got my email address. He got my email address early in the process and then told me what time the draft was. I mean, it feels like that should that should be a text message. So you're with me on here? Yeah, I really am. For sure. That's a code break by Tommy. But I also really know you. I mean, it's. But you know I was 6-07. I thought I was early. I mean, if I send you an email, I then call you and text you to tell you there's an email.

Yeah. That's like your invite to hang out. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The same thing. I don't do emails.

Imagine how you feel when somebody asks you to do something. That's how I feel when somebody sends me an email. I'm like, it's not going to happen, dude. So, yeah, like Tommy Heldzer is sending me fucking ghost emails. Well, and then if you're the commish and it's two minutes to six and you don't see somebody in there, you text them. You text them. So he's a terrible commissioner. He's good on the pod with JJ and he's a good person.

And I want to separate this analysis from how I feel about Tommy personally. He does these great dinners in New York with tons of famous people, never been invited. Yeah. Sounds pretty. But he sucks as a commissioner. And I'm not paying my dues until he takes A.J. Dillon off my hands. Like what? And there was never, there was never a text, not even at 615.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Amina Kimes didn't say? No, no. Mina missed part of it because she was working. I came home early to do this draft. There's nothing worse than not having all participants there for a draft. I'll tell you something worse. Meg had her fantasy draft last night, had the thing open.

I was helping her with it. And she gets to the third or fourth round and she needs a running back. She's insisting on it. So we're looking at the screen best available. there's chub, right? Mm-hmm. So I want to take, I'm like, take chub. She puts her finger on the chub.

She puts her finger on chub. I watch her hit chub on the iPad. Ooh, iPad. Yeah, I know. But it didn't move or anything. I'm telling you, God is my witness. She hits chub. Jamal Agnew.

Bro, I don't even know. Jamal Agnew's not even on the fucking, Jamal Agnew's not even on the page. where was Jamal Agnew ranked among So Meg accidentally drafted Jamal Agnew in the third round She named her team Agnew it all along

I've never heard of this guy I think she wanted to cry dude I know who Jamal Agnew is but yeah He's not supposed to be He's a Jacksonville Jaguar And he wears number 39 as a wide receiver He's a flex guy

Okay and Meg drafted him in the third round So we had a terrible night of fantasy By the way I made her draft Romeo Dobbs In like the 10th So I'm in two leagues The one we do and then the one I care about Right It's a salary cap league

Which is really the only way to do fantasy football In the opinion of Of anyone who knows what they're talking about It is so much fun Okay I went in a little under the weather this week I always have a plan for this league Didn't have a plan

you have a $200 budget. I was down to $38 about 10 minutes into the draft spent $34 bucks on Sequin 36 bucks on Kelsey $51 bucks on Dalvin $41 bucks on Alvin That's a lot of people who rhyme

Dalvin and Alvin with Sequin and Travis Kelsey That's the beautiful thing of a salary cap league is that you can go after the guys you want Now, if I had gone in with more of a plan, maybe I, maybe, ah, I wasn't really targeting Kelsey, but you get into bidding wars. It gets personal. It's a lot of fun. Yeah, like I had Meg drafting all the chiefs players because her brother-in-law, Bobby, shout out Bobby, Patrick Mahomes fanatic. So I got Meg to get Sky Moore, twist the knife a little bit. This is fun. I might, yeah. So I'm bearing the lead. And then I'll continue to bury the lead. I managed to scrabble together a receiving. core of D.K. Metcalf, Jerry Judy, Elijah Moore, which was difficult to do with $38 and $120.20 picks left to go. But I made Romeo Dobbs, Mr. Irrelevant. The last

pick. $150 of $150 for $1.00. You texted me. I was hyped about that. So now we can all, like, we're all in the Dobbs hive. We are. I think I'm going to release them. You're fucking kidding me. Well, why would you do that? There are a lot of guys on the waiver wire. I was like, have you seen the graphics? First, yeah, I have. You send them a lot. Have you seen them? Yeah, I've seen them. Yeah. Um, you know, I was like, Dobbs. All right. You know, Lazard's dealing with something. It's going to be Dobbs. I go on to the, to the freaking death chart. You couldn't hardly find the guy. Yeah. Well, that's, uh, we haven't played. That's why they play the games. That's why they play the games. So anyways, we all got Dobbs, uh, on our fantasy team.

Housekeeping here. I wanted to give out a superlative that I forgot to give out the other day. I want to give a fly on the wall to Tim Brando in his meeting after that game. Did you see that whole thing? They were doing the jump around thing in Wisconsin and Tim Brando basically bent over the other analyst in the booth. Did you see this? I sent it to you. You did? Yeah.

I think. Okay. It's going to be one of those things. Yeah. You want to go back and see if I send it to you? Never mind. No, no. Let's do that.

You want to do 100 bucks? Sure. Okay, 100 bucks. Okay. This is high stakes. Yeah, I think you won $100. That's sick. Or did you?

You want to do Venmo or? Venmo's fine. We can stop down. Reed, can we stop down? So do you want to look at Tim Brando or not? You hooked me with Wisconsin and jump around and Tim Brando in the booth? Did you see him bending over his color analyst, which, you know, like. Spencer Tillman.

Whoa. Yeah, what the fuck is happening there, dude? In that booth. You didn't see this. No. Obviously. Wow. And then he does it is that a slap on the ass?

Yeah. I don't know what's going on there with Tim Brando. This is well said on Saturday down south. There's no telling what Brando's plan was here. No telling. That's a guy without a plan. I think what happened is they started jumping. Yep.

And buddy in the front kind of like Tim put too much pressure on him because Randall was shaking. And then he like fell over forward and you know, you had to hip hinge or else you we're gonna, everybody was going down. Yeah. Tillman, Tillman turns to the side, so then he's just kind of jumping behind him. Which is awkward.

Yeah. Hands on shoulders. He ends up bending over and then I can't explain the spank. Well, then when you have a fella bent over, I guess that, that is the move. To be fair.

I don't know, but fly on the wall. Like, I want to know what the fuck the explanation was. Yeah. Like, it's one of these things that I can't explain. Like,

what happened there? Did something, is there, I'm going to put a Tim Brando Google Alert on my, Tim Brando jump around. That comes up pretty quickly. Tim Brando's pretty, I mean, he's older. You know, he's 66 years old. It's not like he can control. He's jumping around in loafers.

I'm caping for Tim Brando here. Tim Brando jump around. Tim Brando and Spencer Tillman get freaky. Tim Brando tweets a lot. Did he tweet about this incident? Because if he tweets a lot, he didn't tweet about this incident. His grandson is named after Spencer Tillman. Tim Brando's grandson?

Yeah. Spencer or Tillman? His grandson's named Spencer, allegedly, after Brando's colleague and close family family friend, Spencer Tillman. Closer than I thought. That is fucking funny. So fly on the wall, I'll go there. And then, oh, hey, I want to give you an opportunity here in housekeeping to rectify the situation.

Because I feel like a lot of people, somebody said in the comments under your chip take, which that was electric. By the way, good game. Gigi. Gigi. Gigi. Good game. Gigi, Gigi, bro. Gigi.

The first take has got nothing on us. Yeah, that's right. Let's debate something real quick. Okay. What do you believe? God? You want to do you guy? Well, Fred Taylor said kettle jalapeno chips or crack.

Okay. Adam Schein said no, Makin, no. Robert Ayers Jr. said, that's like saying breathing sucks. I agree. It's that, it's that extreme. So, yeah, defend the take, man. You deserve an opportunity.

Okay. When I was at the beach, I went on vacation in May for about a week. Feels like about six years ago. Okay. We were at the poo, the pool, you know? Yeah. I used to think, why go to the pool when you're at the beach? You had an ocean right there.

No sharks. Well, and the little kids, they can't be in there getting pounded by waves. Yeah. You want to go to the pool. It's more docile. Yeah. So at any rate, I'm there. I'm looking around at all the dudes.

I'm scoping out the dudes, you know, because that's what you do when you're at the pool. Everybody's got their shirt off. They're in there. They're in their bathing suits. And I'm seeing, you know, the jacked dudes. The dudes like you, a little bit jacked. A little bit jacked.

You know, there's some fat dudes, all kinds of dudes. And I look at my body indistinguishable from that of a 10-year-old boy. And I think to myself, it's a tall 10-year-old. My physique is the most impressive body type. And that's because it's based on discipline. I don't work on my body. I don't work out.

There are no muscles. I don't have time for that. And I'm also not overweight. Right. Because I don't eat things like chips. When I eat foods... So you have an eating disorder. When I eat foods, I try to go for...

Did you just describe an eating disorder? When I eat foods... I mean, it's not funny. I try to... When I eat foods, I try to go for either nutritious or filling. And chips are neither of those things. Yeah. You know, when I have a chip, which is probably, I don't know, I don't know, five times year,

it's going to be with a sandwich and it's going to be at a lunch. That's the only setting in which I'd have a chip. When on the last pot, you said 3 a. I'm not a week of 3 a. How about when you talked about Ben and Jerry's ice cream? What category does that fall into? I guess filling. Filling.

Oh, good. Love dessert. Chips don't fill you up. No. You need a bigger bag. Dog. Like, and then you, you know, you know, He brought Pringles like, I'm fine.

How about your oatmeal cream pies that you eat? I don't eat those. You're thinking of Nick Savin. Same guy. So look, I understand that chips can be tasty, all right? I'm not saying they're not tasty. I'm just saying they suck. Okay.

Because of the lack of nutritional value because you feel bad about yourself after you eat them. From now on, if you're eating something that's not nutritious and it's not filling, I'm I'm gonna knock it out of your hands. Fair. Let's do that. Last thing you saw me, a bin of Tabuli. Yeah, no, I was thinking about that. And I was thinking, yeah, Tabuli's pretty healthy.

Nutricious. A lot of wheat, heavy carbs. Oh, okay. Poken holes in Tabuli now. Wow. So that was, so the whole chip thing, it's, it's from a personal thing. If I was out there working out, Mr. Universe. Yeah.

Maybe I'd throw in more chip. chips. I can't afford to do that. You can't afford to do it. I have to eat so clean for the sake of eating clean for the sake of staying alive. Yeah. Because I'm not exercising my body or otherwise keeping myself. I think you probably swayed a lot of people there. So why do chips suck then? Isn't it like your metabolism sucks? Like chips are still good. No, chips suck. Yeah, this is, yeah, dude, chips don't suck. You suck. That's my face. A great point. It's not about the chips. No, I mean, I like it when you guys laugh

Because it means you're happy and I like you That's like a shitty That's a shitty take No, no, if we don't think you suck We also don't think chips suck We're saying if chips suck You know, maybe it's not about the chips It's about the beholder, you know, maybe

And also the The The funniest thing said in that clip Was by me And that's that every chip is shaped is sized to fit in your mouth

your whole Pringle's argument you know that's not true you got to and I understand you're saying you can stack them in your mouth you got a Dorito size mouth

you got a Dorito shape mouth motherfucker I can stack other kinds of chips into my mouth I can stack tons of chips I guarantee you I'll show you a bunch of chips you can't get in your mouth

some of these octagon multi-grain chips show me a chip I can't get into my mouth I can do that easy bro a talk A toki. Yeah.

You put the whole talki in there? That's under the category of chips. Here's the closest thing I'll do to a chip. Okay. All right. He's pointing at me for some minutes. If I make, you know, soup, get yourself a soup, I love to put next to a soup those pretzel shells.

Oh, hell yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Pretzel shells are delicious. Yeah, the one I ate a bunch last night. You're talking about the flattened out pretzels that come in the blue bag now? Sure. Those.

Or you can have more of that that are, you know, got more air in the middle. Pretzel shells. Delicious. I'm going to challenge you on this no chip. You can't fit. You got this big mouth. I'm going to challenge you on this fucking thing, dude. There's no chip in your mouth thing.

All right. You can be walking up their mouth breathing. You're just going to, and I'm going to shove it. It's just going to fucking cover your face. Okay. Dorito to the face. You're going to be like, I can't get mad. No, no weird, like, not really a chip, chip thing.

It's got to be a chip. Yeah, chips. I know some chips off top of my head. Okay. All right. Hey, uh, Cumberland, Maryland. Mm-hmm. Hello!

We're not big Maryland, guys. Cumberland sounds halfway decent. If I'm living in Maryland. I want to live in Cumberland. I'm going to pick Cumberland, Maryland. We're saying hello to Cumberland. We're also saying hello specifically to Steve Callis. Yep.

We're saying hello to Steve and his son, Travis. They are loyal listeners. We're thinking about you guys. We appreciate you guys. Yeah, for sure. Love y'all. Our favorite people in Maryland, for sure. You guys are up there with Tori Smith, above Scott Van Pelt.

Yep. above who in the hell coaches those Maryland teams now it's not the fridge it's not is it Ralph Friegeon and Gary Williams I feel like when Rutgers and Maryland went to the Big Ten they it was like to show the leftovers like you were like just where did they go I mean really I can't Turgeon's not there anymore yeah I maybe the maybe Willard's the coach

Willard is the basketball coach okay and the football coach is Loxley oh it's still Loxley still Loxley still Loxley I don't know if he's going to be able to keep up with this NIL and But we're shouting out our friends in Maryland. Yeah, the Callis family. Our favorite Maryland residents. It's about loving y'all. It's not about hating Maryland.

It's not about hating Maryland. It's just, you know, it's just so natural to us to dump on Maryland. But you guys are the best thing going there. We love you. Love's love. Speaking of, I don't know, is Maryland good at anything right now? Maybe Steve's a Maryland fan. You know? That front running son of a bitch.

Yeah. Fucking got a Lakers flag on his porch and uh anyways here's Steve Steve Cochlin Stanford Steve our guy we're gonna pick we're gonna pick division winners and Super Bowl winners and all that stuff gonna be there's a night time machine I got some surprises for you oh I do too I love the Vikings this year they might go to the Super Bowl all right when you're drafting your fantasy team do you ever wish you could do the same thing with your business team if you're building a roster to win the league you need indeed indeed

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Then Macon drove you and me home because we were hammered. And we were about to get out of the car. And Macon said what about the podcast. Do you remember? You taking it maybe the way that he didn't want you to take it? Okay. And do you think he was serious? What percentage?

Yes. Okay. Taking what? What did I say? Yeah, no. He doesn't know. Oh, you don't remember. No.

The line was, and one more thing, he goes, I want my name on the podcast. And then he looks at Steve and goes, there's a 15 second silence because everybody thought you were serious. And you go, I'm looking for a laugh, Steve. Because it was a joke. It's not unlike 15 minutes ago when you asked if I knew much about Tennessee this year. And I said, yeah, I'm a Derek Henry general manager. I knew you were asking about the Valls.

Yeah. but I made a hilarious football joke because there are two football teams with the name Tennessee. I just have a dry sense of humor. Yeah, yeah. Not only do I not think my name should be on this podcast. I do not want my name on this podcast. I know. You just created a burner account.

Respectfully. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you had how many notifications off that chip thing? Oh, my goodness. Yeah, my phone was hot off the all you chip lovers. Steve, what's the biggest thing going on today? I have refrained from going on social media because I can't do the, it's Christmas Day football is back. Like football's been back.

College football has been playing for over 10 days. So I get it. People are excited, but it's an NFL game that really doesn't mean anything. The NFL regular season is that long now where time can be made up. And I get it. People want to see their fantasy guys and their fantasy teams. and that's the majority of it, I believe. So I am not in the excitement level

that I would imagine a lot of social media is on to that. You forgot about the queen dying. What about her majesty, Steve? I didn't know about that. Sorry to break this to you. We should just do a whole show where we call people and break it to them that the queen died. So Steve, we got to move this along

because we've got to call Rissilo. What? We got to call Dave Damashek. Who else should we call? Those people are too online. We need to get less online people. You're right. We should call my parents.

Yeah. Yeah, that's a good one. All right, Steve, before we call all these people, we're going to go through a lot of stuff today. We're going to go through our division winners and our Super Bowl champs, including the score, the whole nine yards. Yeah. We should do Thursday night time machine right now?

Should we do it right now right in front of Steve? Sure. Because I don't want to give anything away and you'll be out of order here. never done it before with anyone watching. Said Matt in the cuck chair over there. Matt's in the cuckled chair. That's one of my favorite features of Studio J is Matt has a perfect chair in the corner. Do you like the set, Steve?

I do. Looks like it needs some work. Are those coach harbos khakis? No, they're making. Well, they're Cowboy Reed's khakis. Oh, okay. Cowboy Reid went to his house to get a pair of khakis. That's how committed he is to this set here.

That was a nod to me. I was sitting on that side of the set when this show started. Yeah, we had to switch, bro. You should have seen how close we were sitting to each other. We were an elbow to a fingertip length from each other, sitting straight. So my neck is killing me over there. And Macon, he's all fucked up now because he's feeling the vibration from the unit outside.

Yes. Yeah, nice. I'm shaking. And in that, In that seat, I could get away with not wearing a hat. Oh, your part. I'm sorry. Yeah.

I really am. I mean, it was a smoke and mirrors deal, but now it's... We're going to fix this. The set's going to change. For people at home, the set's going to evolve. If you happen to see any of our socials, which I know you don't. Except for the... I thought you guys have been killing it on social media this week.

I agree. This week, we've been crushing it. I'm making a joke about how not online our followers are. They're just not very online. You guys are sitting at home saying, no, I'm online. and fucking prove it. Talk to us. Okay.

So we got to start with Thursday night time machine. Okay. So the terms of this are 24 hours in a waffle house. Yeah. And we still got to talk about not to go backwards. You know, but when we were making up after our month off. Yeah, like I'll join you for a minute,

but I'm not going to be punished for winning. You and I were having such a good conversation. We were like an hour into great conversation. And I think you put your. hand on my shoulder. It's like, I'll come to the Waffle House and I'll stick it out with you. Because, you know, like I took this long break and yeah, it was the deadest part of the calendar. I'll just fucking, I'll come to Waffle House to make this right. Just assume I'm always joking. Okay. And I'll tell you when I'm serious. That's a, that's bedrock for a

friendship here. Yeah. You know? Assume sarcasm. I mean, holy shit. Okay. How long will you come join me at the Waffle House this year. Because I love, an hour? Yeah, an hour. Two hours. Two hours. Steve, Jesus Christ. Two hours. Okay, two hours. Two hours. Two hours. Two hours. Oh, wait. So you have to do it again?

Yeah, he lost again. I lost last, yeah, two years in a row. Two years in a row. Fortunately for you, I'm not feeling good about this week. I'm not feeling I'm not in a Thursday night groove whatsoever. How can you be in a Thursday night groove? Football is back. No, last Last year, last year week one, I was like, okay, this is going to be, I went, I started like

seven and oh or something like that. I feel like you said to me last week and I'm seeing the board and I'm seeing, I feel like I'm seeing the board on this one. I don't know though. Why don't we write them down on our computers? Mine is written down. That's a nice thing about look where I can put my computer. It's on a desk.

Ready to turn it towards me? I'm not, well, I'm going to say it. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Los Angeles Rams 28, Buffalo Bills 23. Oh my goodness. 31-29 Rams Wow Yeah Which is a good sign for me Because I think this game's gonna be tight And I'm parking our cars

In the same garage here McVeigh 5 and O in openers You saw the tweet I'm sure But like Florio's You know slam dunk in this pick home You know the McVe advantage To start the season And then teams that trot out on Thursday night

At home that won The Super Bowl last year Have like a huge advantage so Well, in the Buffalo hype train. The Buffalo hype train. The Buffalo hype train. Not only for the Super Bowl, but for the ring you get after winning. And we'll get to that. Because maybe somebody fell for the hype this year. But I think this game opened it like. I know it's been the bill's favored as long as I've seen it. And I don't understand that. Disrespectful line. A.F. Yes. Now, what's interesting about what we're doing right here and then we can get off our little competition. The Rams win by a field goal or less, you're the big winner. But you will, but you will. are cornered into a tight little spot there. Yeah, I'm in a tight spot. Now, if the Rams go up a touchdown

late and the bills need to score to tie or something like that, it's going to be totally fucked up. And if the bills win, it's not a win for anybody. Yeah, and that's fine. Hey, listen, I might root for the bills, but, uh, you know, but I feel good about this. You know, tonight's going to be interesting, Steve. I mean, you can color this in with me, but McVeigh has something to worry about. and so does Leslie Frazier, right? Because you've got the young corners and who's going to step up in the absence of Trudevius White, but also offensively, and this could dictate a little tempo for the Rams,

I don't know about this offensive line. I really don't. And we haven't even gotten to Stafford's health, which I think is going to probably be fine to start the season. But this is going to be, I bet the over, Steve, by the way. Okay. I don't know about you. I mean, it's Thursday night.

It's got all the makins, right? That's why they put these two teams in this spot. I understand what you guys are saying about the bills. I don't get it. I mean, is anybody going to say one bad word about the bills? I still haven't heard one. And when I think about last year what we did, we spent a whole week after the divisional round

and wanted to change overtime. And then what happens the following week, Cincinnati goes in and loses the coin toss in Kansas City, gets a pick and beats the Chiefs to go to the Super Bowl. So when I look back on it, the bills didn't win the three toughest games. And then if you look back to the year prior, they didn't even get to the point where they were the year before. Now, is the road tougher? Yes.

But I just, this idea that they're just going to take this next step and Von Miller's there. So they're good on that side. And Trinavius White is going to be back. I just, I think that's way, I think it's just lazy to think that they're going to go. Everybody loves Josh Allen. I get it. I do too. But at some point, they're going to.

to face adversity. And I think Dave Levin is a huge deal because I want to see what's, are they going to evolve, you know, the run game situation. You know, Gabe Davis, you know, made that splash because everybody saw him against the Chiefs. Is he now, you know, it feels like everybody's talking about him more than they're talking about Stefan Diggs. What's Isaiah McKinney do? He's the new Cole Beasley. Knox just got a new deal. So there's a lot to play out. And I think about the other side, I think about the stability of the Rams. And that's worth something to me and definitely as an underdog

in a home game where they're going to be putting the banner up. You got McVeigh. You got the best player in the league on defense. So I'm with the Rams in this game for sure. And I do lean towards the over knowing, you know, it's hard for people to see this. But, you know, the flags of pass interference do make a lot of makeup in these NFL games

that you don't see watching college for the last 10 days. So it should be a great game. obviously everybody's fired up, but it's in the end to me, it really doesn't mean anything, but I get how everybody's so excited for it. Well, listen, one thing that I'm excited to see, and people at home, you're going to have seen this game already, but I'm excited to see James Cook out there. I'm excited to see what Ken Dorsey chefs up and, like, how much the offense has changed, because from what I hear, the offense hasn't changed much.

And from what I hear, Josh Allen has a lot of input in that offense, and they tried to keep the language as close as they could. So, like, listen, I just think it, I think their problem, are going to be harder to overcome than the Rams problems. The Rams can do things to work around problems and protection. Even the years that they were really good as an offensive line, and the perception of them was that they were really good. They were perceived above what they really were.

And I'm not calling them overrated, but what I'm saying is that they maximize their potential as a group because they're really well coached and they got a great scheme. And McVeigh is a little bit of a wizard. So I think he can overcome problems up front better than Leslie Frazier. who evidently is one of the best DCs at hiding youth in the secondary, that's still a big challenge. You know, you can't just play cover two all night.

So we'll see what happens. You already know at home, but I'm going to take the Rams, 3129 and Macon's got them. 28, 23. All right, we're at least in the same garage. So, hey, real quick here, should we start in the NFC or the AFC with our... AFC.

Good. You want to go first? We're doing it by confidence here. We're going to pick our division winners. based on how confident we are. Yeah. Okay. Number one, the Buffalo Bill.

Yeah, I'm with you there. I think there are three games clear of Miami and New England. I just don't think there's going to be a lot of competition. Who you got in number two? Yeah. In that division. No sarcasm either. Miami.

I was joking about the Viking Super Bowl pick. You got to know. Fuck you guys. You got to know. Miami and New England. It is. and both at 8 and 9. I went through.

Right under the win total. I went through and picked every single game of the NFL season. This is insane, dude. Which was the stupidest exercise I have ever done. It took me all of Labor Day, very laborious, to go through on this big composite schedule and pick every game. But you know my records are accurate. because you people are going to have everybody at 11 and 6 and 10 and 7 and 9 and 8 and the math isn't going to add up.

Well, listen, I didn't pick, I didn't pick schedules. You know, I didn't pick like, so I'm not going to be able to tell you who's 10 and fucking 8 or whatever it is now. 10 and 7. See, I'm a year ahead. They're going to be adding games soon. All right. So if the bills don't win the FCEs, that'll be a major shock.

I think we can move on there. My second most confident I go. Can I say some? Gambling-wise, win-bet is begging you to pound the under on the dolphins. I don't know what the odds are, but they are, yeah, they're begging. Go ahead. And what is that number? It's eight and a half.

Yeah, I think. I mean, that's week one, Dolphins' pets. I can't wait to see that game. And the pets never play well down there. They never do. And, you know, they've got problems in the secondary or adjustments to make in the secondary. I don't want to call them problems yet, but, you know, what are they going to do with Jonathan Jones? you lose Malcolm Butler,

like they are reshuffling some pieces there, a lot of speed. Receivers dinged a little bit, but they're getting three and a half. Three and a half. By the half point and then X out of your window because the dolphins are going to win this game, I think. And I hate to say that. It's Mike McDaniel and Bill Belichick.

I'm not, no shade, but like this is the classic, the public's on the dolphins and Bill, you know. At least keeps it within a. goal. AFC South and Indy is my second most confident pick. I think Tennessee takes a step back.

I think Jacksonville people are liking a little too much. I think that's still going to take a little while. Houston people are also excited about, but these are not division winning teams. It's going to be Indy. I like Indy. That's not a stretch to say, but I think Matt Ryan is going to be more stable than Carson Wentz.

Michael Pittman is electric. we know we're getting from Jonathan Taylor and that O line Darius Leonard back there Lake the cold Shaquille Shaq It's great

It threw me off the first couple times And I totally get it You want to be named something Go for it But like it's gonna take me like a couple months It's kind of like when the team moves You know We used to put a fine in the fine jar

In the meetings When we'd call the you know The uh There's the Chargers San Diego We say you know When San Diego does this Or now you do it with Vegas and Oakland But

Yeah Hard not to like the Colts. Colts are going to be a team people root for, man. Like Frank Reich, Matt Ryan, you know, a bunch of likable guys on that team. I'm also excited to see, and I've said this a bunch, and Gokway rushing next to Defoe.

So, like, this is going to be a complete football team. And you got Quitty Pay, too. Quitty Pay. We'll see. We'll see. I'm excited about, I was excited about Quitty Pay. He came on late in the season last year.

So your second most confident? Are you? Oh, my first most confident is the bill is my second most confident you've kind of swayed me here I'm not I'm gonna admit it I had somebody else but I'll go the I'll go the Colts number two okay third and only third because that aFC West is so competitive third I'm gonna go to the north and it's Baltimore worth unfortunately same garage at a 12 and 5 clear of Cincinnati 10 and 7 yeah

but that's because you haven't looked at the entire schedule, Steve. You're right. Baltimore does have an easier schedule. They do. Than since he, since he. And they've got to be, they've got to be healthier.

I get it. Rashad Bateman's your number one. I just, I don't know. I think they're going to win a lot of games. Professional organization there in, in Baltimore, Maryland.

And this is the kicker. Who do we have in the AFC West? Because we're fourth most confident there. Well, I have a tie. Oh, good. And winning the tiebreaker, I have the Los Angeles Chargers. I got the Chargers too.

Okay. I got the Chargers too. And fuck, man, the Chiefs don't have an easy schedule. They, you know, there's a lot of change there. But I'm not betting against them. They're one of my wildcard teams. I've got the Chiefs. I've got the Bengals.

Man, it's going to be, it's going to be tough. Like, you got to, you got to leave out a good AFC West team. It's going to come down to the Broncos and the Raiders. And they give me the Raiders. Okay. I also have cheese bingles and I went Broncos. All right Steve, how do we do in the AFC?

I agree with a lot. I can't believe you guys mentioned the Colts and didn't mention Jolani Woods. I think he's going to be a huge X factor for the Colts. Come on now, Mason. That one wasn't on purpose. I think that was an honest slip. It's always the first one.

It's tough to get the enunciation. He's joking. Kishon Johnson was joking when he called me Kyle three times. I called him Mike Toplitz. I think Josh McDaniels has a lot to prove knowing what's happened with him previously. Everybody talking about his record without Tom Brady.

I get it. But those are some different circumstances. So I think McDaniels is out to prove a lot. I trust Carr. I think he was tremendous last year and a team that had so much go on inside the organization that I thought he was the face. And I was really impressed with how he handled

Obviously, they get Tante back. So I like the Raiders. The Broncos, I still need to see that defense. I'm not sold on the defense. I understand Russell Wilson's going to play, you know, complimentary football. That's what he does. And then, you know, he's going to do his thing in the second half of games.

So I think there's more stability with the Raiders. I know that sounds weird saying it, but I do. I like the idea. I like the roster. And I just think Denver's a little bit farther back that people are real. and I think they're giving Russell Wilson a little too much credit. I can't go there with the Chargers. I can't do it.

I understand it. The uniforms, this is the year, herverts the guy. I get it all. I do. I just can't. I need to see it first. And the Ravens are my Super Bowl pick. Just in the idea of what they get back from an impact roster-wise.

You know, go back and look what they did when they lost Lamar. They still competed in every game. You go back and look at what they did when they lost Lamar. look at those summer practices, the guys they lost. They bring in a guy like, you know, another weapon. Isaiah likely I think it's going to be a stud and a huge help for Lamar throwing the ball. JK's going to be a process running the football. I'm not worried about that.

In the defense, I mean, seriously, how many years has it been in that hardball era where they've had a bad defense? I don't see it happening. I really like the Ravens thinking that Cleveland's going to tread water for a while. and I'm not sold on Pittsburgh's offense at all. I had my pencil on Pittsburgh. I just... Five and 12.

Five and 12. I think I might even... The total is seven and a half, and I bet you nobody's betting the over on Pittsburgh, the win total, and I'll probably bet the over on Pittsburgh. Mike Tomlin's done a lot more with a lot less. If Mitch Tribesky,

you take into account the time he spent in Chicago with Matt Nagy, you know, solidifying his reputation of what you think it is, like he might be better than that. And if he's not, you've got an exciting young rookie. Yeah,

I think Pittsburgh could be okay. I mean, but I don't know that they make the playoffs. I like that. I like the, I like the Ravens going to, should we give our AFC side pick who's going to the Super Bowl? We should wait.

Yeah, we should. Okay. Steve's got the Ravens in. No surprise here. Pretty classy of me, too, by the way. This is a London edition Eagles varsity jack. at the Great Britain.

Great Britain. You know what whatever this? What size is that? Excel? It's probably a double X. You want one, huh? Yeah. It's an Eagles jacket. Let me put this here. Yeah. It's a beautiful font.

And you're wearing a cowboy hat. You got the whole NFC East covered, eh? Yeah, pretty much. Commanders. Yeah, you're a giant fella. Yeah, pretty much. You got it. Got it. And so NFC East, I'll go Eagles,

and they're my most confident pick. Ditto. putting all my chips on the table on the Eagles, man. There's a ton of talent, okay? It all comes down to Jalen Hertz. That's it. I mean, end of discussion.

I hate, you know, putting an unfair burden on a young quarterback, but, you know, heavy is the head that wears a crown in that city. He's got to perform because next year they got a bunch of draft capital and there's a bunch more quarterbacks. Yeah, I mean, I like the Eagles in that division. I said last pod they're going to beat the Cowboys twice.

I didn't even flinch and I said that. I don't know that it's true, but I feel like it's, there's more of a chance of the Eagles sweeping them than the other way around and I think they win that division. I agree with you. Okay. My most competent pick is the Eagles. I would say one more minor question mark. Well, less of a known commodity is

Nick Siriani still. But that's just a factor of time. No question. No question. I worry about a little bit like their strength is the offensive line. Like can those big guys stay healthy? If they can stay healthy, they'll win this division. If the big guys stay healthy, they'll win the division. One thing is you look at them this weekend. They're playing Detroit. A lot of new pieces on defense. I can count like six guys that are going to play a lot on that defense in Bradbury,

and C.J. Gardner Johnson, Nkoby Dean, White. You've got Jordan Davis. You've got Hassan Reddick. So that's like six dudes who are going to play a lot of snaps. Communication early in the season is tough. It's easier on the road for a defense, honestly, because it's quiet when the other team has the ball. But when you're at home, keep an eye on a lot of these defenses this weekend that have a lot of new pieces and how they reset calls and communicate to the front.

Like, it's a stressful situation. I would lose my voice the first week of the season if we were at home, believe it or not, in the Edward Jones dome, because it was loud at that point in the season. They thought we would still be good. And I would be screaming, what the fuck is the call to James Laronitis?

And we've been together, you know, five, six years, but that's what happens. And there's six guys on the Eagles that are going to take a lot of snaps, albeit on the road on defense, that have to work together. Okay, they played Detroit this weekend. And that line's like four.

I'm looking hard at that. But I don't know if I can, I don't know if I'm comfy enough to, uh, they smoked them last year. They did. There's a new year. Have you seen hard knocks? I did. I cried.

You did? When did you cry? At the end. Are you kidding? I haven't seen the whole. Camp. Oh. When he just can't come up with any words?

It's a, it's a minute of dead silence. I just, I started welling up, man. I love Dan Camp. Oh, it's hard not to. Who doesn't? Who doesn't? Who doesn't? We sent him a care.

package. Nice. A bunch of Copenhagen. He got it. He said the logs kept coming. That was the text message. He eats it. Yeah, dude.

All right. So division number two, I'm going to go to the Packers. And I hate to say this because I'm not sure about any of this because when you hear my three and four, you're going to be like, okay, I get it. This is my most chalky NFL, NFC pick. I do think the Vikings challenge them. The Vikings are going to beat them, maybe week one. And this is going to be the year that every year the Vikings play them tough and fall behind in the division.

This is going to be the year that I think it comes down to the end. Like it really is going to come down to the end. But I got the Packers. This is not my second most confident pick, but I have the Vikings going 13 and 4. Yeah. And winning that division. God damn it. Good for you.

And the pack going 10 and 7. Good for you. And yet, not my second most confident pick just because infrastructure is in place in Green Bay. even if there's a little less star power. My second most confident, I'll go, I'll go L.A. Rams just because of, you know, the Niners will be right there, but we don't know what Trey Lance is.

So Rams, I don't think there'll be any Super Bowl hangover there. Listen, full disclosure, some of these picks are kind of like, well, I feel this way. You might as well make the pick because nobody fucking remembers. I'll make sure you remember if we're right on some of this, right like you if the vikins win we'll replay that clip the niners are my third most confident the

nineers to me are the better football team than the rams now like Kyle shanahan is going to be on him to get quarterback to play to a standard but they re-signed jimmy g i don't know if the captain thing worries me you know that trellands didn't get to be a captain they've got more great players on that team they got a lot of great veterans everything i hear about tre lance is that he's a great fucking kid. So the only reason that your starting quarterback wouldn't be a captain in that way would be if he's not a great guy and he's a great guy. That's the report from there. So I just think it's going to be about them getting off to a hot start against bad teams. I mean, look at the front of their schedule. It's very young quarterback friendly. You've got Chicago, Seattle, Carolina,

Atlanta, all in the first six weeks. Okay? Like you couldn't ask for a better start for a young quarterback. If they can get out of that thing clean from week 10 on, here's another positive for the Niners. They go to LA, to Arizona, to Seattle, to Vegas for their road games. Their furthest game, Seattle after week 10. So this is not going to be a heavily traveled team and they're going to get Washington, Tampa, Miami, and New Orleans at home. Those are four East Coast teams. So I think things actually line up pretty well for the Niners to at least make the playoffs, but I think they, I think they win the division. And the Rams, I mean, like, you're in camp, you hear fucking Matt Stafford's arm hurts.

I'm sorry that the alarms go off for me. So, you know, it's, it's, it's week one. He'll probably feel good tonight. But how long does that last? Super Bowl teams take steps, steps back. I got the Niners. And the Rams close Vegas, Packers, Broncos, Chargers before the Seattle Seahawks. So you might be right on that.

I mean, dude, it just kind of lines up. My third most confident will be those Minnesota Vikings. And then fourth, I go to the south and Tampa Bay. I think they take a step back. What's the total? 11. Whatever it is under. I think they're probably 10 and 7.

10 and 7. I mean, that offensive line, you can't ignore the stuff on the interior. That's a big deal. Yeah. Even for touchdown, Tom. New Orleans 8 and 9. Carolina Panthers 7. Oh, fuck off 8 and 9.

The Saints are winning a division. Okay. I'm saying it, dude. The Saints are one of the division. I might be wrong. I'm probably wrong, but the Saints, they got their number, and I don't think this is a year

where you can afford to lose to the Saints twice. Sean Payton had their number. Okay. I mean, I kind of feel like the defense had their number, and Sean Payton's an offensive football coach. So I feel like Dennis Allen has them by the ball. Dennis Allen has a great record as a head coach. Okay.

Who the fuck cares? Four and a hundred? Who cares? Who cares? Who cares? Is it a new year, dude. Okay. You thought Sean Payton coached coached.

Okay, but I have the Saints win in the division. And think about this. The bucks start to the season. Like all the first take stuff, you know, like there's Tom Brady, is it over for Tom Brady? All this stuff. He took a week off from training camp, right? It was kind of a big deal. It wasn't, you know, enough of a big deal in some people's eyes.

And I think we'll be talking about it in a month. And I don't think that's why they're going to struggle early. I think the reason they're going to struggle early is the personnel. You allude to the offensive line. That's a big deal. But also, like, you're putting a lot on. on Julio Jones. You're putting a lot on the tight end room. You're putting a lot on some of these new pieces that I'm just like, I don't know. And you start the season, Cowboys, Saints,

both on the road, Packers and Kansas City Chiefs. Yeah. What do you have them out of that month? You've probably got it right there. What do you have them out of that month? One and three. And they're going to win the division. I'm just saying. I'm not, I'm not doubting you. Then it goes Falcon, Steelers, Panthers. You know, it gets softer. And that's fine. They will improve. But I'm just saying there's going to be a lot of heat on the bucks come October 1st.

That's all I'm saying. I think the Saints, this might be the year. Nobody's going to remember this anyways. I have the Saints in the Super Bowl. Holy shit. Oh, Saints Ravens. That is the opposite of a Bevel Conway, if I've ever seen one. You know, they're quarterbacked by James Winston. Yep.

You see what he did last year when he was healthy there? ran the offense, ran the fucking offense. And the OC, what do the OC do? When the OC, you want to talk about the OC? OC. Subdening, he was a pinch hitter. Sean Payton got hurt. They put up a bunch of points. And then there was a year where Sean Payton got suspended.

Fuck, dude. I'm excited. Steve, you're helping me. You're helping me out here, dude. And the Bucks, win bet is begging you to take the over. Bucks are now going two and two in that first month. Okay. You just changed it?

You invented it? I was kidding earlier. Okay. This is good. See? This is good. This studio rocks, huh? Jay South, baby. Jay South. So, okay, win bet

begging you to take the over, plus 135 and minus 150 for the under. So who are your wild cards? I got the under at the right time. My wild cards are the Vikings, the Bucks, and the Rams.

So we've got the same teams in the playoffs. My wild cards are the the Cowboys, the Niners. and the Packers. So do you have the, you got the Ravens winning the Super Bowls, Steve, over the Saints, yeah? Yeah. No chalk here. You're the man, dude.

That's why I fuck with Steve, bro. All right, so you can join in on this stuff, Steve, because I'm sure you have this stuff ready, and then we'll give our Super Bowl picks. Real quick, let's rifle through them here. We've got a rookie of the year. Let's go offense. On three.

You and me. One, two, three. James Pick here. that's good that's good a lot of targets he's going to get a lot of targets Deonté Johnson already dinged

yeah and Tomlin was like oh we're deep here no problem and we've heard a lot about Damian Pierce what if what if my guy we've heard a lot about Damian Pierce is he like that is he heard a lot about Damian Pierce

damn dude what if he's like 1.9 a carry you know he could be and Texans and it's a whole new offensive line but there is precedent for running backs on bad teams winning this thing Gurley on the Rams

and Sequin. Now you might say Sequin in the market but this was St. Louis Gurley I thought you might go with Olabe because that's that's getting chalky too. The odds on that are like plus 700. I don't even know if my pick's

on the board. Okay. Let's hear it. Same thing as Gurley. Running back Rams. Kyron Williams. Wow. This guy loves Notre Dame day, man. loyal as the day is long. One day a week. I love Kairn Williams.

Also, the Drake London odds are like crazy. They open to like plus 500 and like nobody touched them. So now they're like plus a thousand or something. I might be fucking that up. But why the Drake London odds? They're going to count bounce passes from Mariotta. I don't know, bro. USC cool name.

Really? They're going to. Pits will be somewhere else. They're going to be down a lot. Yeah, they'll be down a lot. That's true. Kyle Pitt's going to get a lot of coverage. Yeah.

Yeah, okay, I can kind of see it, but I'm not betting that. And the one thing I thought you might take Pickett, too, is, you know. Pickens. Pickens. No, I'd pick it. I thought you might take Picket. Okay. Why, though?

But we'll move on to the next topic. How about defensive rookie of the year? One, two, three. Quay Walker. Hutchinson. Wow. He's just really good. He looks good.

He looks so good. And Brocker said he's good. I talked to Brock and I was like, yo, like, what's the deal with this guy? No, he's legit. I do think he's going to have to learn to burn the edge. I don't, you know, once you start playing these guys with length and anchors and stuff, like you've got to be able to threaten an edge or work something off of it. But I think he's your safest D. Lyman pick because I don't know what,

I don't know that this kid in Jacksonville is going to finish enough plays to put up the gaudy stats that's going to take. Yeah. at first it was a kid from Michigan going to Detroit is he really no he's pretty good is he really all that I think he's all that he's pretty good dude yeah I'm really interested to see that this weekend because he's been rushing mostly which side right right side so he's gonna see Jordan mylotta I really wanted to see him in Lane that would have been like a welcome to the NFL move him all the way around move him around I'd love to see that match up all right and then Quay Walker for me uh you know at Actually, more linebackers, you think, in the past decade that won this thing. He's going to be honest. Nicopi Dean. Is that your defensive rookie of the year? Yeah.

Wow. He's going to make a lot of plays. Steve just took the board and threw it right out the window. Wipeed his ass with the board. How about coach of the year? How about coach of the year? Is this an on three situation? Yeah, let's do on three.

Okay. Okay. One, two, three. Nick Seriani. That's a great pick right there. That's mine. Good job making. And the odds are, well, with your 14 and 3.

13 and 4. 13 and 4. I got 18 to 1. Nice. They're going 18 and 1? You've got the... No, I have... I'm like, that's not even on the board.

I have O'Connell to win Coach of the Air 18 to 1. He's got the fortitude to actually put these bets in. I just put them on a word document. Yeah, it's like plus... What is it? Plus 7 or 800 now? Yeah, it's way down. On win bet, yeah. So I think Seriani is going to take 10 wins.

to talk, you know, I think Josh McDaniels run a really clean camp. That's what everybody's talking about. I think they could be better than people think. Chalky would be Staley, long shot would be Dan Campbell, but you got to win 10 games. That's what you look at. Like, with the, I don't think anybody's ever not won 10 games and one coach of the year. Yeah. So I think Sierraana is going to sneeze and win 10 games. I think they're that, they're that talented. And I might be, in my words. Big market. And by the way, he was pretty good last year, make. He came along. Yeah. They made a just. As long as Jeff Stalwin's there, he's fine.

Exactly. Well, dude, they keep adding people to that defense. A.J. Round, the, the, AJ Brown, Devante Smith. Yeah.

Goddard. They seem to have hit with the, with the D. lineman from Georgia. Yeah. Comeback player of the year, James Winston for me. Christian McCaffrey.

Let's, let's see 17 games. If you can get 17 games. He can't be injured every year, can he? I don't know. It only gets worse usually. That's the thing. I feel like you should have to be in the league over five years to win comeback player

to year. Okay. Who's your comeback player a year? This is one he didn't think about because... No, I don't. We'll go next. Didn't Burrow win it last year? Probably, I would hope so.

He did. His leg exploded and then he became like a fucking sex symbol. Baker's 9 to 1 for that. Oh, Baker winning comeback player a year would be tremendous. I'm rooting for Baker this year. Oh, wow. Guess who just popped up as third best odds? Who? Brian Robinson.

They're saying he may just miss some month. I mean, that would be... Respectfully, if he has a good year, he's probably going to win comeback player a year. I mean, it doesn't fit Steve's rule of being in the league five years or even one. Okay, offensive player of the year. Dalvin Cook. Jesus, you are about to turn purple like your bobblehead here. I'm all in.

Okay, Devante Adams gonna get a ton of touches. Those guys, there was an article that came out. They almost, they almost, they got in a whitewater rafting accident. This is destiny, dude. Devante Adams and Derek Carr. They're gonna have such a great connection.

A bromance. Who's got the best wide receiver quarterback bromance in the league? Well. Edelman and Brady was great. You can probably sleep on Kyler in Hollywood. I was about to tell you not to sleep on those two. We can probably sleep on those two. But it's another college reunion.

College reunion. I got D.P. O.I. I go. Nick Bosa. DeNeil Hunter. Love DeNeil Hunter. Now, Nick Bosa's, that's probably the right pick. But I just keep waiting, kind of like Chris McAfrey,

can he stay healthy one of these years? I keep waiting for, you know, DeNeil Hunter to have 20 and just like be the guy that everybody's talking about because he's got that in him. He's been hurt the last two years. He had a net. in a peck. I think now he's fresh because a lot of times you

have upper body injury Steve and like your legs actually don't get worn down. You're sitting there rehab in your upper body. He's young. I think this is the year with Big Z coming into Minneapolis is going to be a big deal. So I'm pulling for DeNeil Hunter. My neck, my back,

my neck and my peck. I was wondering what you were going to say. Okay, MVP. Steve's guy. Lamar Jackson. I'll go Josh Allen. I would love it. I would love it if it was Lamar again, and I would love it if they gave him a billion dollars.

It's hard not to pull for him. And then Super Bowl, I'm going to be chalky. I'm not. I still don't know who I have winning this game yet. Chargers Vikings. I love that, dude. Wow. I like that.

I'll go, I'll go Bill's Nineers, 31, 27. Okay. What do you got? What's the, you got a pick now, I think. The final score is 2720. Pick the Vikings, dude. Just do it. If the Vikings win and you pick the Vikings,

like you're going to make too much money and I won't be able to, then you'll leave. Pick the Vikings. Minnesota Vikings. Super Bowl chance. I'm not going to be able to afford you. I tick it out of here. That's good.

Okay, Steve. What's the score of your Super Bowl? Ravens 2721. All right. And now we've got to do our three picks. Now we get this thing off the ground. I know you're going to leave Steve. So just give me your three locks for this weekend. We're going to start keeping track of this deal. And we should put something on this. We never put anything on this. I hate my picks. Yeah. You're a Thursday night guy, dude. You really are. Yeah. It also appears on a Sunday Tiger Thursday making. I've, uh, it also appears that I've deleted my picks. I'll probably, I'm probably PD public here, but I'll go. I'll go Baker Mayfield

I'll go Baker Mayfield I think the number's like two and a half Give me one Steve It's now one and a half which is a bit concerning Great, great no problem Okay fine No problem I'm not gonna panic

I'd pick them to go to the Super Bowl But I think they're gonna struggle week one I'll take the Falcons plus five and a half Okay Falcons plus five and a half Yeah hate week man doesn't matter I'll go with another plus five and a half The New York Giants in Tennessee

Okay Oh. And I'm joining you with Carolina. Okay, we're joining on Carolina. I've got the Ravens giving whatever to six and a half against the Jets. I just think this has been a long offseason.

They go out and have fun. And you know, remember when they used to just blow teams out? I think they're back to that this year. Joe Flacco. Yeah, exactly. Who is elite, according to somebody this week.

I'll take the commanders. minus two and a half. Ooh, I like the Jags, baby. Is that making nervous? Sneaky, sneaky wide receiving group that I really, really like. I just hope Wents just gives them the football.

I like the Jags. I like the Jags, man. It's going to be Douggy P. Carson Wentz. Scary Terry, Dodson. Who else is there? Diami Brown.

Oh, Tar Hill. Yeah, he's good. Okay. And I'll figure we start off with some fireworks tonight. I think it's the over. I bet the over. I bet all these, I bet my picks this week, which is a big thing.

Yeah. Yeah, bet your picks. Don't say it, Megan. Don't just say it. Well, I'm not, I wouldn't even shot at him. That was at me. I haven't seen my contract yet for this podcast, Steve. I don't know if I have a gambling stipend or not.

It's a joke. And I'm out of money in the app. I lost the money. I had $17 in my win bet out this morning. Zero balance is no fun. And I'm not going to bet beyond my means. All right. Well, I was at work till 3 a.m.

until that tennis match ended last night. Yeah. And the guy hit it behind his back? Alcoraz. It didn't end until 3 a.m. That's when we went out. Better than that Hawaii beat. How about that?

I talked about that on the pod the other day. I was watching you guys at midnight the other night thinking, God damn, this game just ended. Hmm. My last pick would be I'm going to take the candy, all the hype. Give me the Eagles minus four. Okay.

Taking the candy. All right, we're off to a start. We're off to a start. I don't know it was a good start down here, but we're off to a start, huh? You got one more? Yeah, I've got one more. I'll also take the candy. I'm going to give you a final score.

It's 28 to 10. The Bengals beat the Steelers, week one. Okay. I think that's going to be a close game. I think Pittsburgh is going to cover. I'm probably wrong. I'm probably wrong. Yeah, probably are.

I'm just giving out losers. All right, Stanford, Steve. We'll catch you next week. Yeah, just one question. Who stained that bowling alley? That's your desk. Yeah, he's coming at the set. Guys coming at the set.

That's good. I like that. I don't know, man. We bought it like this. I think it's beautiful. You couldn't grab the low-hanging fruit of the high-hanging taped-on jerseys and slacks? No, I like it.

I think the set looks great. Good job, guys. I think you did a great job, Matt. I think Kelly did a great job. Hey, take it easy, Steve. I love you, Steve. Love you guys. Have fun. Everybody win week one. Yeah, everybody. It's not possible, but if you're here in Arizona, Colorado, Indiana, Louisiana, Michigan, New Jersey, New York, Tennessee, or right here in Virginia, and you haven't tried the WinBet app yet, I have great news for you.

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1-8009-9-9-7-89. By the way, There's a team in Germany. The Bucks are playing in Germany this year. Not London. Speaking of London. Reid, do you have anything for the end of the show? Another Ricky Jervais tweet.

Great. You can only keep three. Ricky Jervais. That's Jervais. This segment's called the Ricky Jervais Memorial segment. Alive. Go. Beer, pizza.

Wait a minute. Sick days. That's actually, that's where it's. it came from because this one is makeup driving bread mobile phone alcohol pets TV dancing novels

haircuts passports and sick pay that's where it came from you must have been looking at that tweet bro I'm gaslit constantly hold on a second hey send us this one Reed I have a confession yeah you saw it too um I saw that

read had put up a different one for a split second Oh my God, dude. Can you all stop treating me like I'm fucking crazy around here? I wasn't sure. Oh my God. I thought that was probably what happened. So,

but instead of saying that, I decided to make the podcast better. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My expense, as usual. Yeah. Okay. So you can only keep three.

Makeup, driving, bread, mobile phone, alcohol, pets, TV dancing, novels, haircuts,

passports, sick pay. I don't take days all. off. I know. Sick pays, I don't need it. Yeah. Uh, these, this is easy for me. Driving pets, TV. My dog, all he does is eat cicadas and shit in his crate. Yeah. Like so, I mean, love the, love the guys. Yeah. But, uh, but, uh, but yeah, I don't know. I just have like a, I have like a great dog. Okay, I don't wear makeup. I know you too. Who was not listening the last time I was at She was really excited to see you.

Okay. They made one of you. Making, we're not doing any more gin. Okay. Oh, no. I don't like alcohol. That was a good fake laugh. I'll,

I'll dabble. I'm just trying to add a little bit of sound to my breath. Okay. Which I guess, like kind of like that. Well, yeah, I guess in such a, you know,

good. So, okay, I don't want, I don't need makeup. I don't need, yeah, can somebody else drive? Um,

yeah. Somebody can drive me? Oh, I'd love to have a, here's another London thing. Guy in Batman. Alfred. Definitely from London. Drove Batman around all the fucking time. I would love to have an Alfred.

If I can have a driver, yeah, I don't need to, I don't have a need for speed. Well, you have $100 in your Venmo now. All right. Mobile phone. I would love to have an excuse not to have a mobile phone. Oh, lost it in the Jervais segment. Yep. it's really it's good there's no more phone email me okay I'm gonna keep three I'm gonna keep

alcohol because alcohol is like a big like I'm not an alcoholic but by the definition you know I'm a binge drinker we all are pretty much and for me like alcohol is a parachute and I'm not talking about like I've had a bad day I'm gonna drink like I don't do that when I've had a bad day but if I'm having like a panic attack or something give me some of those airplane bottles you know If I'm on an airplane and things aren't going well, give me some of those airplane bar. That's how they got the name. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You're in their element. So yeah, I love alcohol. I don't dance. I don't need dancing. I don't read, really. Everything's in an article. Novels.

We just have Ryan Rissillo call in. Right. Good thing. He wasn't on the list. I want to keep my passport because I think you're going to need that soon. And haircuts. don't really do them now the last couple months

haven't seen Dana in a while okay but no haircuts means you're never your hair's not getting cut again oh it's gonna be really long yeah yeah if I live to be as old as you'd have to go Willie

you'd have to be braiding it and yeah no no no we need haircuts I'm keeping three I'm having a hard time with this yeah yeah see that I mean just the concept of it I'm going to keep a I'm going to keep passport haircuts and uh who bread

kind of snuck that one in there didn't you Ricky you almost never eat bread no I don't I'll take alcohol haircuts and and a passport I'll keep those three that might be the funniest pairing grouping you could

you could get from that list okay I'm going to be drunk on a plane to fucking London with a nice haircut. You see the cat getting his haircut in the second or third row at the US Open? Yeah, what an asshole. Can I just say that? Yeah. Asshole of the week, this guy.

Co-signed. That might be a segment. Asshole of the week. This guy. I mean, honestly, we've got to the point as like young online people that like, you know, you never want to be old man yelling at the cloud. Like for people to unite against somebody online who's doing something like getting a haircut for attention at the U.S.

Open. That shows how bad it is, right? Because usually it'd be like, oh, you're afraid to have fun. Like tennis is so traditional, all this shit. Like old people telling this guy to sit down. Sit the fuck down, dude. Yep. Sit the fuck down.

Who is this guy? Fowler, a true professional, knew that camera should not have pinned to him right away. He's a YouTuber. Yeah, he's a YouTuber. G. Dion. Oh, great. These fucking YouTubers, man.

Jesus Christ. Now that's sad. I kind of would like to see the streakers. I'd like for the camera to show the streakers are cool. Because like there's that's challenging. It's not that hard to get a fucking haircut. Like that publicity stunt takes nothing. I was thinking about our fantasy football league and I was thinking about like what our

punishment should be right. And I was thinking maybe one of them would be like not streaking but you got to rush a rush a field and get tackled by police. Yeah. What about going to jail and stuff? That's like white privilege. This is a pretty white league we're in. Big white privilege vibes.

But yeah, like, definitely the going to jail is the, is, yeah, that's the lead. That's the fun part running around and evading the cops, but then where they take you is not fun. But I think that there's skill there. So I'm fine with that. Like I never get mad at somebody who runs on the field. I'm not Connor Blumpkin. Last week's asshole of the week. Yeah, last week's ass, I want to give somebody a runner up though.

And I just want to say this. I'm not, and this is an example, a counter example where like predictably everybody gets on Brian Kelly, but that reporter is, is being cute. Like, you're being cute and he actually played it pretty well. I mean, he's the Prince of Darkness right now. Everybody fucking hates him. It's an easy shot to take. I'd give him a, a C for how he played it. I mean, a real person would have been like, oh, got me. Yeah, but you know what? He didn't raise his voice. He didn't, he stayed like this and he moved on. It's pretty fucking awkward to, like, you're walking in. You just made a billion dollars. You lost your first game in New Orleans.

Orleans to Florida State. Who the fuck are they anymore? And then you walk in and you're just ready to get skewered by the Cajun media. And they're like, they're getting ready to kill you. And somebody walks in late and you do the textbook like, that's his version of this guy was spinning around dancing like quagmire on a fucking, on like the thing they put the cars on in AT&T Stadium up in the end zone. He doesn't know how to be cool, man. This was his way of like breaking the ice was like, oh, we'll do a big party at my house. He's definitely a late guy. He's a guy that likes to comment when people are late, but he put like a fun spin on it at the end. And then somebody got there 15 seconds of fame and he was all right. I thought he was all right. For anyone

who didn't see it, Brian Kelly says, oh, late arriving media crowd, which has been done plenty of times. Put 10 bucks in the kitty. We'll have a party at my house and in the year. That was fine. That's fine. But then the, the reporter says, you know, maybe if you had won, I'd be on time. And here's the problem I have with that reporter. Insert another coach. Play the game. How many coaches down the line can you name that that reporter would not say that to it? True. But Brian Kelly is

respectfully detestable. And so it was, it was a great time. I understand. But you're not doing anything bold. You're just front running. I thought it was pretty bold. You're front running. But then Brian Kelly says, I don't think it has anything to do with winning. Like, has everything

to do with being on time? Hey, the person was late. He just takes himself so seriously. If he kid had just been like uh i understand we'll work on that and you know i'm all you work on being on time you know that would have been you know that sounds a little bit more i i think he just was like kind of i don't know where you guys ruling i mean i i'm going to be disagreed with on this thing cringy he at the end him just saying being he was cringy yeah yeah yeah brian yeah oh my god i'm not a bryan kelly family fan at all i just don't see it like what do you like i only isn't anything with winning.

I think she was insulted and gave it right back to him. Yeah, I guess she probably felt small. Yeah. But Brian Kelly has a way of doing that to people. Yeah. So here's a little taste of your own medicine, my guy.

It's all fine. Yeah, but I don't think he felt small. It's all fine. It doesn't need to be a loser. Okay, she's not asshole the week. Cool. Asshole the week is Connor Blumpkin. No. Yeah. It's the guy cutting his hair.

Guy cutting his hair. Yeah, guy cutting his hair. G.D. YouTuber. I'm not going to say it. There we go. I was impressed that I remembered it. G. D.

On. Can we honor the queen with a special UK edition of alive or dead? Yeah. Fuck yeah. I mean, people are going nuts with this thing. She's 96 years old. Great life. Yeah, she had a great life.

All right. Macon, first up. Okay. The star of the movie Gaslight, Angela Lansberry. That's a very... Why wouldn't you say, murder she wrote.

Okay. Because of the gas lighting that came up earlier. Oh, okay. That's exactly. I'll say dead. She is alive. Wow. Oh, for one.

How old? Very old. She's 96. Yeah. 96 is the new. The new 127. Yeah, there you go. All right.

Chris, you mentioned Alfred earlier. Michael Kane, who played Alfred in the Christopher and Badman movies. Michael Kane died recently. How do you guys not know? Okay. I mean, yes. Fuck yes.

He's 89. Love that movie. He is from London. Yeah, there you go. That's good. He's a lending guy. All right. It makes first guy to go sub four minute on the mile,

Roger Bannister. Those runners, you know, you think you guys are doing yourselves a favor. You're really not. Yeah. I'm going to say that cat's dead. Running will kill you.

He is dead. in 2018. Yeah. It's hard, hard on your body. All right, Chris. Margaret Thatcher, former Prime Minister, first female prime minister. She died because people

just talked about her for a while. She is dead. Tied at one. One more round ago. It's like, what's happening with the Queen? Everybody's like, oh, I remember everything about her. I'm going to walk by 10 people when I get out of here. Be like, tell me five things about the Queen. They don't know, but they're on, they're online

right now. They're on their tumblers. Hamming it up. Makes Ringo Star. Alive. Oh, thank you. He is alive. I thought that was too easy to give to Chris. Pink Floyd.

Yeah. All right. See if you can tie it up, Chris. Ian McKellen, famous actor. No idea who that is. He played Magneto in the X-Men. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. He's alive.

He is alive. Yeah. Wow. I've tired of two. Oh, we go to a tie breaker. We don't just tie? No. You do not just tie, apparently.

Cut-throat in, J-Sow. All right. Making John Cleese, famous comedian. John Cleese. Pretty famous. John Cleese. So like a Jean-Cleese? Or John Cleese?

John Cleese. Can I look it up? I can show you a picture of him. He's that famous guy from Monty Python. You guys are acting like... Oh, he's a Monty Python. He's dead. Everybody in that movie's dead. that movie is so old

makes final call alive he is alive oh fuck me let's go alright Chris famous author Roodyard Kipling wrote the jungle book

oh that racist piece of shit is dead he is dead run off still going makes Anthony Hopkins famous actor this feels wrong alive Anthony Hopkins is alive

84 years old He's got at least 13 more years 12 Yeah you're right Lawrence Olivier Actor Known for his work in Shakespeare Sir

Lawrence Sir Lawrence Can you show me his face Oh I don't do names dude I don't do emails I don't do names

Don't show him his Skeleton face Oh nice I'll give you the young version of Lawrence Olivia Show him a black and white picture That's really A little leading.

It does look like, Reed. You know, good-looking guy. What year is that? No, no, no, no, no. You motherfucker. Lawrence Olivier is dead. He is dead. He died in 1989.

Nice try on the reverse psych. I think we might have to call it at Ty. No, we got to run this thing off. We've done this. Reed, give us a famous English person. Jeremy Clarkson. He hosted Top Gear. Oh, go ahead.

Can we both answer this? Because I know. Are you asking me? I'd love to answer. It's Maconston. I've never heard of this person. My big brain is going to logically think through that read went in search of the deceased. And I am going to say dead.

Jeremy Carxelan is alive. Fuck. All right, Chris, you can win it with this one. Roger Waters from the band Pink Floyd. Oh, Roger Waters? I have a friend that toured with Roger Waters, who is very much alive. He is alive.

His name's Bo Coaster of My Morning Jacket fan. Almost 80 years old. But didn't you just say Bo Coaster was alive? No, and you were about to give you Roger Waters? Are you trying to gaslight me? No, he was clearly talking about it. Yeah. You're fucking, I'm asking the question.

Yeah, I don't need to answer your question. I'm asking the question. Don't need to answer your question. Okay. I will listen to this pod because I'm very curious to hear exactly how you put that sentence together. All right. Dude, no one cares. Only you.

Oh, only. You're the one who couldn't call it a tie, you know. No, I'm saying nobody cares about this tactic that you're using. Like everybody else, everybody else in the room. Not a tactic. So it's not a joke. Not a joke. Okay.

So you really think I, I went bocoaster alive when I was asked about Roger Waters. I think what you said was, I have a very good friend who toured with Roger Waters. Name is Bo Coaster. Alive. It was very much alive. So it's unclear to whom you were referring. He's saying that it's freaking easy for him because he knows a dude who knows him. And then he's like alive.

The construction of the, nah, I mean, you're just saying that because you, you, you. No, because I refuse to be gaslit by you right now. Can we, can you stop saying the word? gaslit. No, stop gaslighting people. Oh my God. If I,

if you give me three wishes. Yeah. Queen Elizabeth is alive. Okay. You're not allowed to say gaslighting, gaslit or anything. And you're not allowed to gaslight. Three would be. Downton Abbey,

another season. That's right. Yeah. One more season of Downton. Yeah. That's good. Yeah. Okay.

mine stop gaslighting oh my god okay no more cancer no more AIDS you selfish fuck that's the end of the show a one dead or alive alive or dead you gas lighting congratulations

thank you I appreciate it you you did decide to answer for boat coaster instead of Roger Waters I'm not I'm just not gonna be affected by this Thank you.