Green Light with Chris Long - Waffle House! Chris Basks In The Waffle House's Golden Glow & Talks With Legendary NFL D-Line Coach Mike Waufle. Mailbag & GBU with Dr. Fax.

Episode Date: August 27, 2021

(01:54) - Hello and Welcome to Waffle House. (11:57) - Former D-Line Coach Mike Waufle Talks Coaching Michael Strahan, Working for Al Davis, Winning the Super Bowl, Dealing with the 2012-15 STL Rams D-Line, and Lends Chris Some Waufle Knowledge. (47:38) - Waffle House Employee Cindy on Chris' Waffle Challenge. (55:20) - Good, Bad, Ugly: Teddy Bridgewater and Drew Lock, Tooth Fairy Money, Hot Dogs are NOT Health Food and More Turtle Questions. (1:24:18) - Mailbag: Favorite Comedians, Superstitions, Website People Don't Know. (1:40:30) - Nutritionist Nick Barringer on Chris' Waffle House Nutrition, His Body During the Waffle House Challenge and Eating Bugs. Green Light Spotify Music: https://open.spotify.com/user/951jyryv2nu6l4iqz9p81him9?si=17c560d10ff04a9b Spotify Layup Line: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1olmCMKGMEyWwOKaT1Aah3?si=675d445ddb824c42 Green Light with Chris Long: Subscribe and enjoy weekly content including podcasts, documentaries, live chats, celebrity interviews and more including hot news items, trending discussions from the NFL, MLB, NHL, NBA, NCAA are just a small part of what we will be sharing with you. http://bit.ly/chalknetwork Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Yeah, I'm on number 10 right now. Number 10, yeah. So you've just essentially you've run out of room, Chris. So, you know, I see some water there, which is good because you want to have some fluid because what that's going to help is, you know, not to go into too much for the audience, but some gastric emptying, which probably needs to take place, right? Yep. Good morning, everybody.

My yesterday, your two days ago, I went to the Waffle House and I set out to complete the Waffle House challenge. and I would say I won but it was not without great effort and it wasn't without great discomfort I'm going to take you on a ride

here that's going to last you about two hours and I'll be popping in every now and again but I am alive I'm fine sorry for the spoiler enjoy hey guys I'm here I'm at the Waffle House you can probably hear plates clanging in the background you hear waffles being cooked

this is the real deal holy feel. How many podcasts do you get from inside a waffle house? I got a nice corner booth. I'm hanging out. I've already started eating. I'll get into that in a second. If you listen to the pod, you know I lost the bet.

And it would look like I'm the real loser sitting in a waffle house for 24 hours with my only lifeboat being pounding these very heavy waffles into submission.

like for every waffle I eat, an hour comes off my time. So I got in here about 115 and I planned on leaving by sundown. You do the math on that. And it might be my choice if I stay till sundown. I was that confident when I walked in. I'm prepared. I've been fasting. I've been listening to Taylor and the guys.

I've been eating the nutritional tips. I ate one giant meal last night. It was a filet. two sides of mac and cheese, a side of Brussels sprouts, a side of broccoli, two cornbread, which were big pieces of cornbread, and some fried oysters. And I top that off with an ice cream sandwich. And I want to shout out Maya restaurant. And then from there, I shut it down.

I got a little stone to watch White Lotus, and I ended up with, forget what it was. It was something high in fiber. A bag of skinny pop. That's all, okay? And a couple little nibbles of fruit this morning because it, you know, set, like a fiber foundation for all these waffles so that they exit the building the way they came in. I'm hungry when I walked in the building today. All right.

Like I said, prepared. I did the meal right. I fasted right. Those are the good news things. Right now what I'm doing is I'm doing this for the love of the game. I'm doing this because I pay my debts. I'm doing this because I'm a man of my word. Macon's at the beach.

And yeah, you might think I'm the real loser, but I kind of think he's the real fucking loser. He's at the beach with his family. It's 120 degrees outside. There's not even like anything to look at at the beach. It's just sand and the ocean. It never looks different. He's not in the Caribbean. He's at like a standard East Coast beach with his small child,

his lovely wife, and his parents. And he's there for a week. I get to go home at sundown. Okay. Who's the loser? He won the bet. He decides. The bad news.

Yeah, it's hot. It's not waffle weather. It's like literally 100 degrees outside. I went for a run after I saw the sodium content in the amount of waffles that I was trying to eat is like up around a few thousand milligrams, which is bad. You know, that's enough to make you, if you don't have man boobs, you're going to have man boobs. Okay? Like, I was totally dreading coming in here in this weather, T.U. Waffles. I had abs.

I've had, I mean, like 30 minutes ago, I had abs. First time of my life, I had like six abs, not even a lie. Not anymore. Bonneroo's in 10 days. I'm going to look all bloated, but I'm paying my debt. I'm also, here's the worst news of it all. I'm battling constipation. I want to say that quietly because there's families here. In fact, I just made eye contact with a woman, and I hope she didn't hear what I said. I'm battling constipation right now, okay? And I've been pounding the stool softener. Okay? I'm all loaded up on stool softener. I'm all loaded up

on fiber. Um, but constipation, much like, you know, a grade three hammy is just a mental distraction. You know, this is my grade three hamstring, uh, mind over matter. Okay. I'm all business. I came in here with one fucking outfit. It's on my body. Okay. I'm not even wearing socks. I'm wearing swim trunks in the waffle house. Okay. I'm wearing swim trunks. I'm going to be out of here soon. I don't need to change. I'm not going to need a change of clothes. When I played for the Eagles, there was a guy named Jason Kelsey. We talked about him a lot on the pod. And we go on a road trip, he would have the tiniest duffel bag, like the size of a shoebox.

And he'd balance that thing on his massive shoulder. And it was like khaki colored with green straps. And guys would laugh at him. Probably a lot like the one you've seen on the Philadelphia Eagles, like, sight when the guys get on the plane and whatnot. Like Jason Kelsey has that draped over his shoulder, every road trip. And you know what? when you think about it, you don't have a lot of baggage. You don't have much to think about.

And what that says to me is burn the ships. Me wearing swim trunks to the Waffle House is a burn the ships move. We're burning the ships. I'm going to be out of this motherfucker by son now. And I told my my wife I'll be home and I mean it. I told my children, I'll see you tonight. I didn't say see you tomorrow. I said, I'll see tonight. So I will be leaving later. And I talk to my old nutritionist in New England, Chef Ted, who's a man. Okay, shout out Chef Ted. He said it's a man. He said, it's a marathon, not a sprint. So guess what I did? I ate six waffles in 15 minutes. Okay. I don't even know why I asked him for a strategy. I was going to do what I was going to do no matter what. Okay. And I'm going to need to Gardner Minshu here at some point. By the way, congratulations. Gardner Minshue can now

relax and take a number two. And usually bloating will stop me in my tracks, but not here. I'm going to be sitting mostly. I'll be walking occasionally. I'll be keeping the exercise going. I'm just walking laps around this place. Now the good news. Okay. Cold A, see lots of natural light you know like if this was a listing for a house like I'm buying okay it's got everything you need a couple great producers here got an Exxon nearby so if I need them to run out and get me some like I don't know tums or whatever it is or the tin-to-dip these guys can do that because I can't physically leave the waffle house so the deed is done there's also a taco bell here messing up my appetite and making me appreciate what I have in front of me which are

these delicious waffles cooked by my new friends here. The branding is great here. I just want to remind people, waffles are better than pancakes, and IHOP has a big mountain of branding work to do. I mean, every Waffle House is iconic. Every Waffle House is awesome. IHop, your only chance is to make all of your buildings look like a stack of pancakes. You need like a syrup fountain or some shit like that. That's the only way you can keep up with Waffle House. Okay? Waffles are better than pancakes anyways fundamentally. All right. And here's the best part of the whole thing. This is literally like a family. This Waffle House is like a family. Some of the nicest people I've ever met and some of them can hear me recording right now. And they know I'm not full of it because

when they walked in, I said like, I might stay two days. Yeah. Yeah. So shout out to the team here on Fifth Street extended Waffle House here in Seaville. They are awesome. When I came in, I felt like literally, You know how you walk in the house and like, yeah, you feel at home. Your kids are like excited to see your wife. It's like 50-50. But here it's 100% like legitimately, hey, this is awesome. And so maybe we have some new podcast listeners. I got a new friend named Cindy.

I called her my guardian angel. I'm going to have her on in a second because she's been giving me tips. She drove from like an hour away to come visit me at the Waffle House. She's a valued employee. She FaceTime her boss. earlier, put me on the phone. And I said she's one of the best American workers I've ever met. Cindy has been hooking me up with tips like, hey, some Sprite would probably help because you want to burp. You know, if you're going to put down all these waffles, you got to, you need the carbonation.

I don't know if it's true or not. She might have stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night. She might not be an expert, but I'm listening to her. She's got a name tag. They gave me a name tag. They gave me a waffle hat. In fact, her boss said to me, he goes, how many do you eat? I said, I've eaten six so far. He said, we're going to be taking a nap. soon and I kind of am feeling that waffle melatonin kind of washing over me a little bit. I finished six waffles in 15 minutes and I'm going to let it set for a little bit. At first, Cowboy Ree was talking about, hey, is your stomach sending you signals yet? That's what we read about.

The stomach sends the brain signals to tell you you're full. No service, okay? No service. Stomach had one bar. At some point here, around Waffle 6, a 300-pound gorilla jumped on my back. And all of a sudden, my stomach had service. I don't know if it was holding the phone in the air, but my brain is receiving the signal. And now I got to chill out for a little bit.

The signals are reaching my brain. So I'm going to interview Mike Waffle, my old D-Line coach. Hey, I don't even need to tell you why he's coming on the show. His name is literally Waffle. And we struck out on every other guest. Like I was DMing. I DMJJ. I DMJ.

I'll read you the DM later. It's pathetic. I'm DMing competitive eaters and just being left on red. But I do have my old D-line coach. He coached that legendary Giants D-line and the should have been legendary Rams D-line. And he coached for the Raiders when they were in the Super Bowl, Rich Gannon. So we'll tell some stories we'll BS.

And then out of that, you'll hear from my guardian angel, as I called her, Cindy. She had a couple hot tips for me. I'll check in with her for a second. And then we got a big show on the back end, some mail bags, some surprise guests, some Dr. Fax. Dr. Fax just walked in. He's all smiles.

He don't have to eat any waffles. So without further ado, let me bring Mike Waffle on the show. Super Bowl champion, defensive line extraordinaire, U.S. Marine, and daycare supervisor, Mike Waffle, my old coach, is joining me live from the Waffle House. What's up, Woff? Chris Long, one of my favorites. Asking me to be on, and I'm looking forward to this. How many waffles do you think I have down, Woff?

You said six. The last time I'm going to check, where you at now? I'm still at six, man. My great-great-grandfather, okay? Our last name was spelled, W-A-F-F-L-E. He was a highly decorated Union soldier in a Civil War. He actually was in the 141st Infantry Regiment out of Stuban County in Western New York in the southern tier of Western New York, not too far from the other.

really. And he actually fought his first battles in the state of Virginia. His first battle was in Chancellor Bill. Oh, yeah. I'm a Stone Hall, Stone Wall Jackson was actually shot in the arm and died after that battle. You know, he lost his left arm. And then he fought in a place called Crossroads, which was actually east of Richmond. And so the Confederate headquarter was in Richmond, Virginia, Okay. That his third battle, okay, was on this place called Deiscond Bridge, all right, which is by Toano, Tijuana, Virginia, all right, which is down towards, you know, James, you know, James Town in that, in Williamsburg, okay, it's kind of down in that area. And then, and then Suffolk, the last battle he fought in Virginia was it's Suffolk, okay, folk or Suffolk. Suffolk. We say Suffolk. The Suffolk? Okay, right. for his last battle in Virginia was and then and then he started after that and that was his first

four battles that he participated now the greatest thing about Henry Waffle was this because he was a decorated soldier he was chosen to guard over Abraham Lincoln's body and the Capitol building what yes that's great guy wow that's pretty good I mean you did some cool stuff in your life but that's That's pretty damn cool. Henry Waffle. How did he change his name? He changed the first letter in Waffle to a U, right? So, I mean, I used to call recruits, you know, and just so they could remember my last name. And I said Waffle was a big key. And I said my spelling of my last name, to help you remember, okay, they changed the first F to a U. So if you can't remember that, F you.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said back in 1837 that it's very difficult to be simple enough. You know, you're in the NFL, you're with the elite, very, very much genius status by several individuals there. You know, some used to say they had 162 IQ. I felt like I had a 162 street IQ. But there was some very, very intelligent people that I worked with. Al Davis was the greatest intellectuals I ever worked ever, ever. Yeah, tell me, you know, a story about Al that might illustrate the people kind of at home. that wouldn't know.

I mean, my dad, I grew up with these stories. I mean, the guy transcended, you know, the structure of NFL front offices at the time. Yeah. I was at Cal Berkeley, you know. Cal Berkeley was very close to the Raider facility. You know, it was probably eight miles away. And but we lived in the Oakland Hills, and he lived in Pemont,

and it was just over the hill, actually one mile from my house to his house. Okay. And so I lived there in that five years when I was at Cal prior to going to the Raiders. Now, I had an interview with Al Davis one-on-one for me to get the job because he never hired a defensive line coach in the history of the Raiders prior to this out of college. He always had guys, you know, like Earl Luggett, your father's coach, you know, played pros and they're pro guys. That was the first time. So I had to meet with him one-on-one. Now, did it.

Our house is one mile apart from each other. up in the Oakland Hills, okay? He flies me, all right, to his condo in Marina del Rey in Los Angeles, all right, to meet with him while I'm on for four straight hours of grind, you know? At the end of it, he says, Michael, you just do what I tell you to do. And by the way, I got all your left. Now, I had wrote the man from the first time I met him when your dad was in training camp down in Oxnard.

Yep. It's the first time I met him. I mean, it was like the first year they were there. It was 1983, 84, something like that. But it was the first year they were there, and that's when I met him. He goes, not only do I like East Coast guys, I really like New York guys. I'm being from New York, that was always an advantage. No, him, because he was from Brooklyn.

Now, what he did was that I thought was really, really, really special, okay? Is that I didn't know the league like that well. and every, every other day called me all the time and met with me every day and taught me the NFL. And that was his whole deal, that he was going to advance my knowledge of the National Football League. And we were, there was only 30 teams in the NFL when I came in. Defense was 30. And my first year, we finished in the top five of everything defensive. And so, I mean, he was great and he taught me everything, you know.

And so I was kind of, you'll love this story. So we're sitting in a meeting and I'm kind of talking. He's talking about sacks. He goes, I want more sacks. And I said, Mr. Davis, you know, prior to us getting here, you know, we've almost doubled the number in sacks. So from last year he goes, I don't care. I want more sacks.

He goes, I pay those guys millions of dollars and I don't know why I'm paying you. That's good. Who was your kind of alpha in that room? Oh, in the beginning, it was awesome. I had Russell Maryland and Pat Swilling, Andre Bruce, you know. They were like my older guys. They were, they were, and then my young guys were Darrell Russell, Grady Jackson, you know, Lance Johnstone. So I really had a nice mix there and they all were successful.

Lance was in double-digit sacks multiple times. Darrell Russell made the Pro Bowl first two. He's in double-digit sack, you know. Grady Jackson, you know, he ended up gaining an awful lot of weight. But his time when he was with us, he was very, very. productive backup. I mean, at least for me, the first D-line that because of my age and when I was watching the NFL, like that I really fell in love with the U coach was the New York D-line and everybody was enamored with it. I mean, you've got, you're sitting here in the office, you've got a lot of

giants memorabilia, you've got a lot of, you got a strayhand jersey sign. We had Oseon the other week. We talked beforehand. You know, what a special group and what a unique group, like any D-line, right? I mean, what was that atmosphere like in New York and why did you seem to love it so much? Well, I think the thing that you know firsthand, okay, and you experience on a day-in-and-day-out basis when I was a young coach, I decided that I really didn't like myself. I was coaching like a Marine Corps drill instructor, you know, all the time. And I really thought to myself, you know, if I can coach a defensive line like I would want to be coached, okay? That would be my ideal situation.

And so that's why I always created that environment. And I did it in college. And we had a lot of success at Cal Berkeley. I had a lot of number ones on that D-Line, you know. And so I carried that into the NFL, and I never thought that it would happen. I didn't know if it could happen. And it did. It happened at the Raiders.

It happened at the New York Giants. It happened every one of them. And if you really talk to those guys, you know, like you said, the OEC, you know, knowing him, but they really appreciate and remember that freedom that they had in that room to be able to express themselves and wake up every day and, like, couldn't wait to get into a room. Well, you never know what you're going to get when you walk into a D-Line room.

I really do believe that they are the biggest characters. We are the biggest characters on a football field, and we're also the tone setters in a building. I feel like, and you did a good job of this, You just talked about it. You have to let us be us. You know what I mean? Yes.

Yes. And the players play the game. You know, some of these coaches, you know, they take it on the shoulders and too much, too heavy on their shoulders. The players, if people come to watch the players, they don't come to watch the coaches. And the players are the NFL. And that's the end of story. They're the ones that draw the fans.

And once you realize, and I realize, I realize that's one thing Mr. Davis taught me right away. I mean, he told me that right away. Humbolded your little butt right away, you know. And I think that's important, you know, that, you know, you realize that it is a players league. And that, you know, they're the ones that are bringing, you know, the people to the stadium, you know. What do you think is the most dominant game your Giants team or your Giants Front ever played? Because people remember the Super Bowls and that sort of thing and they were dominant games, but you had so many to choose from. The one game that I always, always are going to remember, you know, is the game up in Green Bay.

It was a game to go, the NFC championship game, to go to the Super Bowl. And when Kathy and I held the Super Bowl trophy to take a pitcher, they had the NFC championship trophy. And I said, you know, Kath, I really want to hold that. And then you think to hold the Super Bowl trophy in our pitcher because it was 25 below zero. I don't care what weather reports they got that day. It wasn't a lot of wind, but at times, it was 25 below zero. You look at Coach Coughlin's cheeks and how red they were, probably the same way.

It was freezing. And some of those DeLiaming, man, no sleeves. And Green Bay had been running the football like crazy out of people. And they actually had 240 plus yards the week before in the playoff game against Seattle. and we held them to 25 in that game, you know. And, you know, and we took the, we took away the run, you know, we forced him to pass. We didn't get a lot of sacks and stuff. We harassed Farr.

Farb got rid of the ball quick, you know, it was one of those kind of things. But, but we won that game up front and I was really proud of that. Michael Strayhand, guy on your wall, jersey right there of your left shoulder. Somebody I've known from, you know, early on because my pops know him so well. And you always use Stray to teach a lot of different techniques and, you know, mindsets and that sort of thing. And especially, like, the power with which he played the game. But, you know, even as dominant as he was his last year,

he was thinking about not playing for that last Super Bowl. What went into him coming back on the field? Because we've talked about this a little bit. The thing about Michael that I thought it was so good to be able to pass on to anybody is that his character, and he might have been more the nastiest people on game day. I mean, just very intense. I mean, he would knock you out in a New York minute, just the intensity in his face.

You could just, he could express it. And it really came internally, you know, just a really tough guy. But I had a flip phone, okay? And I barely could use the flip phone. And this was 2007. And I was, you know, trying to call him all the time. Hermosa Beach, you know, we were going through training camp. And I finally, he said, he called, and he texted me. I get a text message from him. And so I had to text message. He would text

message with me. And I had my big ass fingers on that little flip phone. And that was the first time I ever sent a text message was to him. And that's where I had to learn how to text. After a few days of text messaging him, I said, you better talk to me right now on the phone. I'm sick of this text off. So he did sign the phone as to Michael Lissa. This team reminds me. We had a good three-year stretch. We lost to Baltimore after Big Saraglucid took out Rich Gannon, you know, for the Super Bowl. We would have played the Giants. And we would have got a chance to win that game with Rich Gannon. We got the tuck rule the next year with Brady, with that team at the Raiders. That was our best team. But that next year when John Gruden went to Tampa and we had

to play him in a Super Bowl. That team, you know, went to the Super Bowl, and that was a very good team. But the team the year before was better, okay? And so that was taken away from us by the truck rule. And anyways, I told Michael, I said, listen, those three years, I got to be a Super Bowl team. And this team at the Giants, it's like that.

The only missing part is you. And he goes, Bluff, you lost the Super Bowl. I said, no, that's not the purpose, man. You got it. You know, that's not it. You got to, you've got to come back to this team, you know. You're needed. Yeah, it sounded like he just wanted to miss Cam.

Yeah, he just, you know, really big much of the difference, you know. How about his technique? Because, you know, it's, he was very precise. I mean, he's very powerful, but he was also very precise. And the precision and the power made for a lot of successful rushes. In all of my studies, with the exception of Reggie Boy, okay. He was the greatest power rush. And your father, the greatest power rushers ever, they knew how to really leverage people.

You know, your father had a shorter legs, longer torso, and that's always, that's really a good, you know, how he was just great at leveraging people. Michael was the same way, you know. He was built different. He had longer legs and shorter, so, you know, but those combinations really allowed them plus with all their God-gifted strength. he was one of the greatest power rushes in the history of the NFL, along with Howie, who he said that went along with Reggie White. I felt like those were the top of the three ever. But the thing that he always said, I gave you credit to office because I taught him how to be an edge

rusher, you know. His last staff was a chop club, you know, on Brady in the third quarter, you know. You've seen that a thousand times, but it was just really fun, you know, to have, you know, help him, you know, being able to convert from, you know, stuff using power all the time. I commented on that picture over your shoulder. It's one of my favorite pictures in the world, you know, quite literally. I posted that picture on my Instagram the other day, and I got a text from Will. And he said, man, I look at that picture.

I want to cry. You know, like, we were just, we were a very tight group in St. Louis. And I'm referring to a picture that was in Sports Illustrated. I saw him, I believe. And ironically, this was after we had a lot of our. success. So, you know, you got a guy or two in that picture like Nick Fairley, who wasn't there for that long, but we had a very special group. Speak to speak to the people about kind of what we had in St. Louis. Well, you know, the thing is to shame, you know, you went to New England and you're

a retirement and you got to have that power of position, you know, and Nick Folles. I love Nick, you know, we were together and you guys did it in Philadelphia, you know, but you got to, it's just a shame we didn't have that kind of an offense, you know, together when we were there those years because we were to tour this league up. That's how good that defensive line was. So we led the NFL in those five years and tackle for losses. And I think the next second place team was like 40 behind us. I mean, it was a yearly. And we were that and you know, I used to put the stats up there all the time. The other thing is that we led the NFL, weren't even close. was the quarterback hits and knockdowns, you know, because, you know, a lot of those could have been

converted to the quarterbacks were so scared of us. They'd get rid of the ball, too. You know that. Oh, yeah. We were very, very, we were good rushes. And that's probably the one unit, Chris, that realistically, if we had the right circumstances, we could have broke the NFL sack record. That's how good we were. Yeah, I think one year we were up in the 50s for sure. And, you know, it doesn't hurt. to have a guy like Robert Quinn who had 19 in one year. I saw it up close. What were you seeing from the sideline?

Because, you know, I had, you know, nine sacks a year, whatever it was. And I felt like I had about three of them. You know, it's just so crazy to watch. You're always a step late when it came to. He's so quick. I mean, you're just as clean as clean. Derek, really, you know, you remember we, you know, I'd always cut up your great brushes. You remember we did that.

We always bought them on the first place on Friday. That was kind of funny. Everybody used to feel good Friday. I never would show the good plays after the game. I'd always just show the plays after the game that we need practice. And then on front of all our good stuff together, tackle for losses and our rushes. Some of those rushes were terrific that weren't sacks. Some of your rush outstanding and your power inside, your inside moves,

you know, that you didn't hit sign the quarterback or muscle one or way quick, you know. we really had some tremendous rush. And the thing is about it is that you could take those takes, you could take all those plays and we made up some of the greatest teaching plays of how to play the game and how to rush the passer. And I still have all those, you know, too. Yeah, I'd never see anything like Robert, though, because he picked up that chop club thing and he did it way differently.

Like OC would kind of be, you know, shoulder width apart with the feet and he'd be stuttering in, stepping on a guy's toes, and bouncing back out. Rob was running full speed to a spot, jumping in the air, touching the ground on his chop, and then touching the ground with his knee and turning the corner. It's because he's so long. Yeah.

He's so long, and that's why. But he's so fast anyways, you know. So he was pigeon-toed, you know, and he was kind of, you get the corner like crazy, you know. But mechanically, that's the way you were doing. And I was always on them, okay? You know, it's just faster, you know. I just sent our group text,

the picture of you on Zoom. and Quinny just texted back and circled the Strayhan jersey nice and big. Everybody knows who your guy is. I think what he's trying to say is, where's my Robert Quinn jersey on the wall? Mike Brocker said, tell the story of when me and AD flattened his ass on the sled that one day. My man was hurting. Well, you guys remember, I had some really seriously serious back surgeries, okay? and foot the rain, but I had back surgery, okay?

And I'd always get on the middle of this Gilman sled that the tension on that spring would come back on you guys and it's probably unfair because it was probably taken out a 500-pound blocker coming at you like a semi-truck, you know? Probably. You know, you think it was a little unfair? I mean, I'm glad you waited 10 years to tell me. But at the same breath, you know, we took pride. We used to take that across the field, training camp, remember that?

No doubt. No doubt. 120 degrees in St. Louis. We were going to drive it across the field and back. Is that eight-man sled or whatever it was? Michael and A.D. were there, and I would move my foot, you know, and I had my hands on it, but I would step backwards on the rail to be able to balance myself, be able to hold myself, because when you hit, they hit that thing. I mean, you know, it was crazy. So I must have flinched, and I didn't have my foot on the rail, and they hit that thing. I had both my hands on the back side of those spring pads, and I flew in the air, and I landed on the back part of that sled, okay?

And I mean, it ribs and back, butt, hip, everything hurt, you know? And if you remember, I didn't say anything, okay? I thought you were dead. I just walked around. I just didn't say nothing, you know, I just walked around. It's kind of, you okay, you okay? Just silence. I didn't say anything.

I had to show that I was a tough-ass Marine, man. But the level was probably on a scale of one to ten was rated at 9.5. Hey, listen, that was one of those things where, like, you'd put us through so much pain on that sled. Eventually, we had to knock you off once. And we needed the godlike strength of Aaron Donald. The Aaron Donald pick, take me behind the curtain because I know there was some, some like disagreement and then you know like for you you like long players but you like day d you saw

it from day one well the thing is the thing is that you know he won about every trophy there was in college football you know long already trophy and everything you know but you know he he he was I could see it I mean it's just it was the greatest gift as you guys know and you used to I would throw things out there with the exercise physiology background and I get you guys try things and you're kind of like, you know, no, Woff, that ain't going to work, you know. But I always think about the physical part of it, I was always to be able to do that. That's one thing Al Davis always appreciated is that because of my geology background with my master's in it, I always had an eye for talent physically, okay?

And that was Aaron. I could see it. I timed him at the combine, always on the floor, running the drills at the combine. I timed him 153 and a 10. And I'm like, wait a minute, no way, no way. I time them myself. I don't care what the, I don't care what the combine said, but he had a type of explosion, you know, and I could just see it.

And so a lot of teams passed them by, you know, we weren't looking for a number one. But, you know, Jeff Fisher listened to my story, you know, prior to the draft. And when he was there, we already picked Robinson at that second pick. But when he was there at number 13, you know, Coach Fisher, you know, he was a general, He made all the decisions. He was the general manager, too, really. But Coach Fisher allowed us to have Aaron on the D-line, which was just phenomenal. It was one of those things where people were like,

y'all have five first-round picks on the D-line. Why do we need another one? Well, you pass him up. Everybody's going to call us idiots. I was actually working on a project. I had the TV muted. I wouldn't even watch in the draft. and I think the tenth round, you know, the tenth pick, a tenth pick, and I look up and I go, oh, my God, nobody took Aaron Donald.

Are you kidding me? And then I got involved, you know. I had him up higher than Clowny or anybody on board. I had him up way up. I actually had to jump with my one-foot vertical jumping. It threw his name up at the top of the board, and he was always at the top of the board at an angle slanted up there, you know? I just, I had that much high regard for him. One of the funny stories is, you know, the 30 visits that you have.

prior to the draft, you know. He was one of three visits. And Jeff Fisher and, and, and, uh, Lest Knee and, and, uh, all the, all the CEOs and everybody, they were doing the quarterbacks and all the offensive coaches were in the draft room and the quarterbacks. So I just, I didn't knock out of door or anything. I just opened a door and I just walked in, interrupted.

So we just, you know, I walked over and I had my arm around Aaron's shoulder. Okay. And I walked in the room with him right, with him, with my arm, on my arm, if I shoulder and I squatted down so that we were the exact same height. And everybody loved it. That was really cool. I would say Woff, you know, you said Stray is the baddest dude you ever saw on game day on two cleats.

Well, maybe I don't want to put words in your mouth. But for me, the baddest guy I saw in two cleats on game day was Aaron Donnell. And I only got to see him up close for a year or two. But there's nobody who was meaner. But that's okay. Hey, you were no little piece of cake. I mean, you did some nasty things. That's what I like about that thing.

You know, because we did some crazy things. I mean, yeah, we did crazy. How about Gene's talking? Hey, Gene was nuts. And I always tell people, you know, I think a lot of it is I didn't get, you know, notoriety until I was, you know, half the player I was in my prime because, you know, I wasn't on winning teams. And then when I got up to Philly and New England, people started to pay attention.

And, you know, when I get these interviews, they were like, is this the best D-line you've ever played on? And this isn't throwing shade at any of the awesome players that were on that D-line. But the depth we had on that St. Louis D-line and the top-end talent, there's nothing like it I've ever been a part of. I'm close. You never were blank. Nobody would ever blank. Everybody, like, if you needed to be subbed out, we felt comfortable. just subbing in all the time.

Yep. And that was a great thing. Greg Williams, he allowed us to do that. Well, one of the hardest things I can remember, and William Hayes and I became like best friends. But when you got to St. Louis,

I was used to be in a 70 snap a game guy. You know, I was used to playing 80 snaps a game. It was almost a point of pride. Like, you can't kill me. You can't take me out. But I remember we went down to Detroit and Will only took like nine snaps

and you were at the after the game on the bus. We were like, hey, man, like we got to rotate more. And I can remember in my head. I was like, like that, but eventually the rotation thing became one of our big strengths and it became a thing we took pride in. Yeah, it's like a pro wrestling tactic, you know, the offensive linemen in the fourth quarter, they just, they hated it. Yeah, and it's different styles, you know, like you'd go from, you know, myself to William and on the other side of be Robert to Eugene or something else,

or, you know, there'd be, you'd have to, you'd have to block AD and Kendall and, you know, Nick Fairley. And so everybody has different styles. And I think, think that's really tough for alignment as well. I agree. You know, and everybody, you know, everybody played so hard. That's what was number one. Everybody, it's so hard because they were fresh. And if it didn't, I mean, there's times, I mean, you know for a fact,

you brought your guts out for just two plays. And you go, come out in, Will. Yeah, yeah, just tag, tag, tag. Just until you got you, you know, you got yourself over. And then you go back in, but that was the freedom that, That was another thing that I did, the freedom on. I allowed you guys to have to substitute for each other without having a coach involved. Yeah, that was really good.

I thought that was good because it put, like, onus on us, and it improved our relationships because we had to work out, you know, me and Will or Rob and his and his backup or whatever, like, we had to, and we didn't say backup because we were all starters. And, you know, like William Hayes could start 30 teams. You know what I mean? Like, it doesn't even matter. But before you go.

I need one. I need, I'm like seven waffles down now. I have, you know, an unknown amount left eat. You know, it's kind of, it's kind of rare, okay, for the Waffle House to be operating right now. It's between one and three in the afternoon. Normally, their best time is to operate is between one and three a.m. as so the bars closed, right? And I'm in Mobile, Alabama, and Eric Gimbaugh is a train coach at the rate. It's been a long-time strength coach for the Pittsburgh Steelers, all right? And so Garrett and I were a really good friend. And we walked over from the hotel over to the Waffle House, right? And as soon as I got in there, I went to the back, you know, and then I came back and I walked up to the counter. And everybody was like,

they were just so nice. Talk about Southern hospitality. Extra this, extra that's nice, talking, smiling, very, very pleasing. And I thought, man, this is the Waffle House right down here. This is one of the greatest experiences that I had. I thought the southern hospitality was off the charts, you know, and just being down in Mobile, Alabama. So we're walking back to the hotel and I said, you know, Dee, I says, I really appreciate how nice the people were to me in that Southern hospitality down here. He goes, I told him your father owned the Waffles House, and your name was Mike Waffle. That's so good. Hey, that's good. Hey, I got the owner of the Waffle House on here. He's the CEO. He's on my computer. I'm telling all

of staff here. Hey, I need a, I need a, I need one energy, juice life from you to get me through the day, okay? I had, I had a great, great head coach, okay, and his name is John Bruton, all right, and he used to walk to the meeting room, and he go, energy, life, juice, you know, and that really, you're wired up and get you going, you know. The other one is, and you had me do this on the podcast is my head coach, Bruce Snyder. He was a great head coach that, you know,

I ended up at Arizona State, Cal Berkeley. And anyways, Coach Snyder and my head coach at Utah State, I was just captain on his first winning team. The coach Snyder said, one thing I want you guys to do is when you wake up, because we're getting ready for, we just finished up training camp, getting for our first game,

when you wake up on game day morning, the first thing that goes off in their head, you know, and every guy that I taught that and just like all the time, you know, this, Aaron will text me, you know, and go, day, game, day on Sunday morning, you know, type of thing, you know, and so it's, it's, you know, that's a good little tricky one too that I thought was a little cliche that stuck with guys. After I usually took five seconds to forget, you know, try to remember which city it was we were in

or whatever whether it was Detroit or Cincinnati, I did. I said, game day, game day, game day. And Aaron definitely was on the show and still does it. So, hey, Mike Waffle, one of the best. Appreciate you so much. Always great catching up with you. And I'm in your house for a few more hours here today. So thank you for letting me crash and eat some waffles in the Waffle House.

And give Whelan and Luke a big hog. I couldn't believe that picture. You know, it's amazing how much Luke looks like Meg. Yeah, it's good for him. It's good for him. Oh, whales got that long. Yes, he does. Yes, he does, man. So, miss you, man, love you and talk to you soon, okay? All right. Take care, Chris. Thanks a lot for having us on the show. I'm on a show.

Yeah, man, of course. Of course. So, Cathai. See you. It's fun talking to Woff, man. You know, Woff and I are really tight. You know, we used to butt heads. You know, like any coaching players, especially when you're in the trenches for like a long time. I mean, we, in the NFL nowadays, you don't have a coach for longer than a coach. couple years if you're lucky or unlucky. And I had Woff for, golly, about five, six years. And in the prime of my career, you know, right after my big year, Fish came in and, you know, Waf came in. And so did a lot of great D-Lyman to kind of join the group. And it was special. It was special. And we talk a lot now. We don't butt heads anymore because we're not arguing over,

hey, what am I supposed to do on this play or that play? But one thing Woff always did was, and we talked about in the interview, he got us to buy in and play extremely hard for each other. And you know, like he said, it's about the players. And he did a good job of setting that environment up where guys could really just act like we were a bunch of fucking pirates or something. Like we thought we were, we were unruly. We were unruly all the time. And Woff leaned into that. He didn't try to button us up. He let us be unruly. And that was why he was great. Another anecdote that I forgot to tell you about Aaron Donald was, this is a true story. People have read this where Aaron said it. When Aaron came in the league,

we all knew he was really good right away. In fact, I do want to take credit for being the first person calling it, that he was going to Hall of Fame. I can remember where I was. It was the third day of camp. Jim Thomas asked me, I believe, in St. Louis. I said, this kid's going to Hall of Fame. So anyways, Woff saw the same thing.

And Woff talked to A.D. The first week and said, you do whatever the fuck you want to do, I'm not going to try to fix anything you're doing because you've pretty much already got the tools. It's just going to be about fine-tuning. And I think it's a great lesson, man. Like, you know, as a rookie, it's evident that he's going to be great. You're not trying to change that rookie. You're not trying to put your stamp on him. You're trying to accentuate what

he does well. And I think that even though Woff didn't try to kind of take over Aaron's thought processes or change the way he played, Aaron would tell you that Woff had a great deal to do with his success. I mean, Aaron was going to be successful no matter what. But when you're talking about being a Hall of Fame or it's cutting hairs. You know, it's 15 sacks here. It's 15 sacks there. It's one more Pro Bowl year. It's one more double-digit year.

And those are the things that make the difference between being the best ever and one of the best ever. And I do believe Aaron Donald is going to be the best ever. So Mike Waffle, a lot of fun. Great catching up with him. You know, what's not so fun is my mindset right now in the Waffle House. I'm seven waffles down. It was not easy to get to six. I took a quick break.

Waf popped on. I just milked seven all the way through the interview. And it was slow. Now, I'm not constipated anymore. And there's some good news, bad news there. The good news is, you know, I'm not constipated anymore. But the bad news is I've gone through this process here at the waffles. house. So I rounded the corner to go to the bathroom, and this isn't an extremely large

Waffle house. The characters are getting to know each other here. And as I round the corner to hit the bathroom, I think everybody knows where I'm going. And when I open the door, it's a single toilet. Like, there's no stalls. There's no urinals. Like, if I drop a bomb in here, everybody knows who it was. And that's going to be a dicey situation if I'm here for a while. So, like, knowing that is a little bit of a mind fuck. But the good news is I'm no longer constipated. I am officially at the Waffle House as of about 10 minutes ago. So without further ado, I want to call over my best friend Cindy who works here at the Waffle House.

Actually, I don't work here at the Waffle House. I said she came from Lynchburg, Virginia to see her boy. I had no idea about the podcast. Certainly never saw me play football or anything. You heard there was maybe a famous person coming in here. I don't know who told her I was famous. Because the Lord knows I can't tell. I was all worried about, hey, if I post that I'm going to be on the Waffle House,

maybe there'd be like two, three guys pop up. It's quiet as a church mouse here. love it. It's just me, the raccoon, the producers, and Dr. FACC should be here soon. So let's get Cindy on to pick her brain a little bit about the Waffle House and me trying to complete this challenge. She's got a lot of sage wisdom. My second guest at the Waffle House is Cindy, who I called earlier, one of the greatest American employees I've ever met. Cindy, how are you? I'm doing excellent, Chris. How are you? I'm good. Welcome to the Greenlight Podcast. Thank you so much for having me. Oh, this is the first podcast ever recorded from this Waffle House, probably, yeah.

Absolutely, and this is actually my first podcast ever doing. Yeah, so well, that's good. You're pretty good so far. Thank you. Yeah, no problem. So Cindy works at the Waffle House, but she works at the Waffle House. Where? On Ward's Road in Lynchburg, Virginia.

So you drove up here to see your boy. I sure did. Cindy's awesome. She came up here. She's taking good care of me. She's giving me some hot tips about waffles. tip number one was we had a sprite on the table because I like Sprite because it doesn't have any caffeine in it. So I was getting ready to crush it.

And my buddies were like, don't do that. The carbonation is going to slow you down. And you said what? I said that I think the carbonation is actually going to make you eat more because you will burp, which will make your belly, you know, less full. Yeah, I like that. It's basically science. And so far this worked, I burp twice.

I don't know if you heard me. I did. I did. So when do you think if I wanted to get out of here before it gets crowded, what time is it going to get crowded around here? And don't say 1 a.m. because I know at 1 a.m., it's going to be out of control. Well, typically during the week it's not so bad. It can get a little crazy at nighttime at all off the house. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Kind of need security. You need security? Oh, yeah. On the weekends, it's hectic. We are slam-packed on the weekends down there. Yeah, you're going to need, what's your ringer? Oh, is that a ringer? Yep.

What's long as that? Kevin Gates. Oh, it's Kevin Gates. Kevin Gates is at Bonneroo. But unfortunately for Kevin Gates, it's during my morning jacket, so I might miss him. But Kevin Gates, Kevin Gates. Okay. So let me ask you a question.

Yes, sir. How many is the most waffles you've seen eat in Lynchburg at your location? Probably triple. So three, three waffles. And for me, like just customers coming in. I haven't had anybody come in to do like a challenge like you have. but in one sitting, three waffles for sure. Now, we'll have people that come in to go in the order like, you know, 10 waffles to go.

Ten waffles. Whoever's eating them, I'm not sure. But maybe their families. Yeah. Yeah. I'm thinking, I was thinking when I walked in here 12 would be pretty easy to put down. I'm down seven, I'm seven waffles down and the pace is slowed. Oh, yeah.

And I, oh, absolutely. Because the waffles are definitely filling. It's like bread. So we'll have, we'll have customers that'll get the all-star breakfast that comes with the waffle. And they won't even get the chokes because they have the waffle. They don't want all that starch. Yeah. They're starching these? I'm sure of it. It's red. Man, it feels like they're starching these. Absolutely. All right.

Honestly, I'm going to change my answer. You are the first person I've seen eat seven waffles. Okay, that's good. No, well, they said somebody came in here and ate seven waffles in 15 minutes. Somebody set a record. Yeah, it was a cadet at Virginia Tech. But we're not in here for the sprint. We're in here. for the marathon. So if the over under, do you do gamble? Yeah. Okay. Well, so generally if I was to, yeah, you are smart. I'm smart. I know that's why I like you. She, I've been calling her my guardian angel.

So Sandy's my guardian angel. She doesn't gamble. I should aspire to be like her. But so generally, if I was to say an over under, I'd set a number and you tell me if I'm going to eat more or less than this, this waffle, judging off of what you've seen already and your knowledge of waffles. If I said it, if I said it, 15 do you think I'm gonna go over under that number can I ask how your stomach is feeling right now it's feeling like a two-car garage or three cars in it okay I'm gonna guess I'm gonna stop at 15 okay that's what I'm gonna give you I'm gonna give you that you Vegas knows Vegas knows because since you have the

rest of the evening and you have until Vegas knows yeah if anything happens around here this evening and I needed security could we call you Absolutely. Come back and rough some people up. Absolutely. Okay. I got your back.

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. I got your back. I already told you that stayed till sundown. No, well, sundown is when I'm supposed to go home, but I'm starting to feel like maybe it's not going to be sundown. Well, no, it's going to be a lot later. Yeah. Yeah, do you like football?

I do. Do you have a favorite team just for the people at home? I do, Washington. Oh, the Washington football team. Stick with the same team. I was telling him that I used to be a really, big fan of the New York Giants. Oh, well, Dr. Fax played to the New York Giants. I didn't really have a favorite player either.

I just loved the New York Giants. I always rooted for them. And then, you know, Washington, I think I got that really for my mom. She was a big Washington fans. Oh, really? Like, I guess it rubbed off with me. And I just, I've loved him ever since. Like, kind of a disease a little bit. I grew up in a household where it was me against like seven other people who were rooting for the Cowboys. Yeah, yeah. You had me who was by herself. Ghaly, that's when you just walk outside and find a new family. That's a lot of crazy shit. So what do you think is harder, rooting for the Washington football team or the Waffle House challenge?

What's harder? Yeah, what's harder on the person doing it, eating 24 hours worth of waffles are rooting for the Washington football team? Oh, yeah, that's rough. Yeah, it's rough. There's no easy answer that. Absolutely. Yep. All right.

All right. Well, Cindy's a Washington football fan. She's a valued employee. Yes. And she has been making us feel so welcome. So we really appreciate Cindy her debut on the Greenlight Pot. I actually just got my first year because I've been here for a year. So I finally got it today.

Nice. Congratulations. Thank you so much. Hey, big round of applause for Cindy. She's leveling up. Yep, I'm going to see how many years I can do with the Waffle House before. Well, I hope you do a million. If you want to do a million, you should do a million because corporate needs to know this is like

employee one. Also, Cindy, yeah, Cindy, another. thing is I wanted to show you my co-host and you could either make fun of him or tell me he's kind of cute or you could tell me he's too skinny or because he's going to be in the Waffle House next year because he's going to lose this bet this coming football season and we're going to send him to Lynchburg. Yeah, you should. Absolutely. Please. Yeah, no problem. Hold on one second. I'm going to pull up a picture of making. He's handsome. Oh, wow. He's handsome. But her face is kind of like, he's handsome, but there's a butt. I mean, you're better looking. Thank you. I appreciate that.

That wasn't even the point of the exercise, but he got a handsome. Yeah. What do you think about his haircut? Do you think that works for him? If you were his stylist, what would you do? Yeah, he definitely needs something else going on with that. Yeah, like maybe like something faded. Slickback looks good.

You like my mullet. Yeah, you like a little bit of the. I love the slick back kind of look. So, yeah, he should, he should slick it back. I love it. All right. Well, Cindy, thank you. Congratulations on your year of service at the Waffle House. Thank you so much. And here's to many more. Yes. This has been a privilege. Like, you guys have no idea. This is amazing to me. I've never done anything like this.

Hey, listen, you're a pro. I mean, you came on here. You're not even nervous. I'm not at all actually. She's like, she's a pro at this. So with the next Waffle House challenge next year in Lynchburg, we'll talk to Cindy again. Because I'm going to be there because I'm not going to you. Cindy from Waffle House, y'all. Thank you, Cindy. Thank you. So this good, bad, ugly, was just what the doctor ordered.

This was a really rough time at the Waffle House that was starting. And when Dr. Fax strolled in, it was like wind in my sails. And the edible didn't hurt either. All right. So we're back. I talked to Cindy about 40 minutes ago. We took a break, took a breather. Dr. Fax is in the building.

Yo, yo, yo, what's good? How does my skin look? Do I look pale? Yeah, you're not looking as vibrant as you usually. You usually look. You're looking kind of sluggish. Yeah. Your posture. My friend Nina from the posture studio in downtown Charleston, she would not be happy with

Are you trying to get a posture endorsement? Yeah, you know how to throw it in there. Yeah, the reality is set in. This is a real thing. Okay. like I came in here with this this attitude you know that I was just going to be able to go mind over matter and I just let willpower take over and it's not true

and I hope that everybody knows that this is a serious thing I mean I don't know how else I can put this I was going to liken it to like when people get COVID and they didn't think it was real and then they find out it's fucking real I mean like it's kind of like that but it's less serious you know what I was thinking you should probably do if we plan on doing this like every year at a Waffle House maybe you should try to get like a pepto-bizma. Endorsement? Yeah. Yeah.

We'll get that after we get the posture plug. Yeah, the posture is to be. You know, it's almost dinner time here. It's it's we're almost four hours in. You know, I walked into this place at 116. It's 508. You know, we got settled. we started eating i'm at you know i did six waffles in 15 minutes before you got here they briefed you on

that right yeah i heard and the last two have been going down the hatch slow if you come in here and do this like by choice you're like a wing suit guy like you legitimately are just not wired correctly so let me ask you this did you do you think you underestimated oh absolutely no question no question the line the line was like nine and a half i thought i was going to win and we're down like 14 points in the third quarter. So what waffle did you eat? Or was it just after you ate the first one, you just felt how it felt. No, it was the end of the sixth one.

That monkey jumped on my back and I haven't been right since. So I talked to waft. You know, I picked it a waffle. I talked to Cindy. I've been picking it a waffle. And then I threw about 30 milligrams down the hatch. You know, it's edible time and waiting for this thing kick in and make me feel okay. So are you afraid?

Are you afraid the edibles might do her thing in there and force you into the bathroom? Edibles don't make you shit. Edibles make you shit? I mean, when you have a lot of stuff in your stomach? No, not me. Not me. Not me. Not me.

What I really want from the edibles is a sense of calm, is a sense of, like, pain relief. I am in a lot of pain right now. I can see it. Yeah, it's like a dull body ache. kind of thing. You know what I should suggest? What should you suggest? I think at some point you should probably get up. Do you think I'm allowed to pull the trigger? Does that call? Does that, does that, like if I pull the trigger and bomb, I don't think that indicates the whole. I don't think it would help. I don't know. Not for you if you're going to eat. If you're trying to eat more like to get

out of here, I don't think it's going to help like eventually because I feel like I also think it's against the rules. If you pull the trigger, it'll make you want to keep throwing up. Well, well, I think at some point you should probably take like a few walking laps. I think you need to. I can't leave the waffle house. I don't think, am I allowed to be in the parking lot? If you're still on the ground? No, you're not.

They say I can't be in the parking lot. So the shift has changed here. And I think the biggest thing is like in the condition I'm in, um, the opponent's about to start the biggest drive of the night. And that's, that's dinner. Because I don't plan on being here for the one a.m. crowd. No way.

The dinner crowd is going to be interesting. So we'll see how this goes. So let's get to good, bad, ugly. This in and of itself could be ugly, and then we'll get to a mailback. We might have a dietitian calling it to explain to me what's happening in my body. I have some good questions for him. Oh, you do?

Yeah. Okay, good. At least two. You got two? Okay, I'll put you down for three. All right. So good. I think everybody agrees, and as we record this is Wednesday evening,

Teddy Bridgewater, getting the start. We thought the other day with your first. No, no, no, no, no. You and Jeff, don't add me into that. I actually wasn't. I was talking about the talent on the show, not to nothing. Oh, okay. I'm talking with you. No, no, no, but we thought that Teddy Bridgewater would sit until at least week five. I did not think Vic Fangio had this in him to make this call.

It's the right call. It's what Twitter wants, which rarely is the right call. but it's the right call. And I think we've seen enough of Drew Locke in Denver. I mean, maybe he ends up back in saddle, but if he does, that team's not going to be competitive at that point. Hey, but here's my thing when that situation. Why does everyone look at it like that?

Like, you have a good backup. Like, it's good to have two good quarterbacks on your team. Listen, absolutely having two quarterbacks is going to be essential. Last year we talked to Bruce Ariens before the season, which feels like yesterday. and we said, you know, have you thought about, you know, bringing quarterbacks in and kind of stashing them so that they're out of protocol perpetually, like keeping somebody at home and saying like an emergency thing? Well, this fall, we're going to have a lot of the same mechanics. You see what's going on in New England with Cam.

You've seen what's going on with Kirk and the questions about his plexiglass box and all that stuff. evidently an epidemiologist came in. Do I say that word correctly? Came in and spit some knowledge at Kirk, but I don't know if Kirk could hear it from inside his box. Plus, who the fuck cares what an epidemiologist says? I want to see what Facebook says. I like them having these two guys because of the volume,

but I don't think, and I agreed with you right off the bat on the surface, but Drew Locke being a backup, I think a really good backup depends on the kind of team you're on, but with a team with a good solid defense, maybe a couple pieces around you. You want a back on it's not going to turn the ball over. So, you know, like Drew's got to work on. I mean, that's why he's where he is right now. I mean, he hasn't been able to take care of the football.

And maybe he'll learn. And maybe he'll learn from that. Like, you know, he'll get those extra reps in practice and during the year. And it's something where if he does get in there, hopefully he can hit the ground running and it all works out. And a lot of times you've got to hit rock bottom as a player to get better. And so, you know, a benching or demotion is rock bottom, especially when comes to the team that drafted you.

And you talk about like that second shot or like that, just that new opportunity for quarterback. And you have to think about in the long run, this is this is that second or third shot, the way you look at it for Teddy Bridgewater. So it's just one of those things that I think that for all quarterbacks, any position, like if you have a situation and you do feel like you're at the rock rock bottom you get hurt or whatever it may be you get moved out of your spot you just have to

keep grinding because this is indicative of of teddy like everything he's been been through like he he didn't really do anything wrong except for i believe just getting hurt well he was injured and he's listen if we're being honest you know teddy's never been a top tier quarterback and he's probably not going to be a top tier quarterback but plenty of even more plenty of mid grade cats get get paid yeah and get and get trust And I think what we were hoping for, at least when we talked about it on the show when it first broke, was that, hey, maybe this is the situation where you got a team that's good enough that's not going to draft high enough to take your replacement. And if you can prove it on a one-year deal, I believe he's on a one-year deal with them. If you can prove it, that's great.

This is the perfect opportunity for Teddy. If he doesn't get this one, he won't get another one. Now, he might get another one, but not with as much upside where you can play yourself into a bigger deal on a team that's, not going to be good enough or bad enough when it comes to drafting high that you're going to get your apparent. Do you have any good? No. Don't think of anything. There's no need to force a good. No, I'm still kind of grieving from SNAPs.

Did we ever get to cause a death on SNAPS, the coroner ever come back? It's kind of shady the fact that he just suddenly died 30 years before his... I mean, like you said, like... Did you guys have, like, turtle insurance or something? No, no turtle insurance. James River Runners doesn't offer insurance on their turtles. Yeah, James River Runners doesn't offer a protection plan. The James River Runners don't offer a protection plan on the turtles that you take from their river frontage.

But seriously, man, we need a, like, I need a cause of death before I can really put this to bed. Hey, bad. I got a bad. It's good. Whalen lost his tooth this week. First tooth he ever lost, yeah. So, lit. So are you going to do the tooth fairy thing?

So we're doing the, we're doing the tooth fairy thing. I'm sorry, if anybody's listening, and I've done this with Christmas, tooth fairy's not real, guys. Okay, so no spoilers, you know, don't come my kids. So you're not going to do it? You're not going to. No, we did it. We gave him a dollar.

He lost a tooth. That's what I said to Meg. That's a lot of money, dude. That's a, bro, only a dollar? How many fucking teeth does he have? Bro, you're supposed to have least give like a five. He's five years old, dude. So what?

What's he going to do with that dollar? So we haven't even gotten to the bad part. You really think a dollar is not enough? The kid's got 10,000 teeth. He's like a shark. And they're all going to be coming out. Yo, a dollar? Hell yeah, dude.

Money doesn't grow on fucking trees. Bro, I'll be. Not everybody's getting a windfall from a tortoise insurance claim. Man, I can't even make a minimum bat at wind. bet with a dollar bro no you can't that's true but it's it's here's the ugly part or the bad part we're not even at the ugly part yet but you know his tooth's getting ready to come out and his mom's trying to get him to lose it because you know it's it's getting ready to come out and then and meg's megg's not forcing him but he's got to go to school tomorrow and if he loses his tooth at school

you know he you'll lose his tooth he won't get a dollar from the tooth fairy i mean fuck but when we get down to it he's having a little trouble getting out said why don't we tie a string to the golf card. You suggested this? Yeah, or a truck or something. I've seen it done online. I've seen it done on like. On jackass. That's a jackass move. Is that where I saw it, Reed? Yep. Danger Aaron

gets his tooth pulled from bam driving a Lambo. Okay. Well, it pops out cleanly. Every time I've seen it, it's popped out cleanly. Now, I didn't even lead with that. I just said, let's do the door thing. Meg was like, that's not a thing anymore,

man. Like, people don't do that anymore. Did you know people stopped doing the door thing? I just always thought that was like some movie shit. And like to be quite honest, don't want to put it out there. That's more of a white guy shit. Yeah.

Like for sure. I don't think any black parents are like, hey, let's I want to ask you this. I want to ask you this and I want it to sound right. How are loose teeth handled in your community? I think honestly,

Um, it's something where I think I remember telling my mom and my mom telling me just to keep moving it back and forth with your tongue. And you got $5 when you lost your two. Probably not. See, when you were a kid, $1 seemed like $100. So you, I mean, like a $1 is plenty of money for a five-year-old. My five-year-old doesn't need a dollar for anything. You want to tell, you want to know how the five-year-old spent his $1? How? He already went to went to the fucking dollar store. Okay? What?

Yeah. So imagine if he had five. Well, imagine if he waited for five teeth to be pulled. He's a total consumer. He was like, we were like, hey man, there's this thing called saving. And he was like, nah, I want to go to the dollar store tomorrow. I was like the dollar store. They got a lot of choices of the dollar store.

What did he get? He got a green thing that totally appeared to be a dog toy. You know, we have a young dog. He's going to learn his lesson. with this toy because he spent his hard-earned money in one place. You ever have like a granddad who said, don't spend it all in one place? My granddad would give me like $5 for Christmas and say,

don't spend it all in one place. And they started giving me bonds. And I was like, I don't even know what to do with these. So don't worry about it. So here's my explanation for why the dollar, it used to be a good tool, compensation, but why it's not now. Inflation. Inflation.

When we were younger, a dollar, we could get brought back. of chips. We don't even have a quarterback of chips anymore. 20 cowtails. Listen, I'm totally with you. At the lowest level, inflation has actually affected tooth compensation. It's funny, though, we had a whole pillow with a little pocket in there. It says, for the tooth fairy in the whole nine yards. And when you explain, like, I feel like my kids at least, like, he's two years away from realizing Santa Claus isn't getting real.

Like, pretty soon he's going to find out. You know that, right? My older sister ruined it for me very, before I can even get into it. Well, I'm just telling you, and you seem fine. Yeah, I'm fine. Okay, so I think he's going to have a hard time wrapping his head around that there's a woman that comes in our house, not through the chimney. You know, we have an alarm system. How is she entering the house?

How does she do her business? Like, he's not, I think he might be playing us for the money. I think he might know that this is not real. and I need my dollar and I'm going on the dollar store. So that was my bad that evidently my practice for getting a tooth out is completely archaic. So my bad is that the New York Post put out an article that supposedly glizzies, aka hot dogs, take 35 minutes off your life for every hot dog you consume. I saw this. Have you done the math?

here's the thing nobody knows how long they're going to live so we don't really know what that like we we don't know what that figure is but i immediately when i read this article just like recently all i thought about is how you were trying to get competitive eaters on the show and one of them didn't respond back one of them all of them none of them evidently they're all the busiest people in the world i did not know that they had jobs outside of what they've shoveled food what if they're all right now just panicking because if they're all competitive eaters they've all been in a hot dog eating contest probably i would guess probably more than three and they've consumed a lot of hot dogs yeah and with that article coming out 35 minutes per dog yeah that's a little lizzie that's an

hour plus every two dogs so just a competition joey chestnut had 77 that's 36 hours okay you know I think with these Joey Chestnut type guys, it's a live fast, die young situation. What's the alternative? They probably have at least two weeks less than an average person. Okay, but no offense to a competitive eater, but are you taking the 88 year, three month and two week lifespan with, you know, millions of dollars possibly? Or are you going 88 years and six months? Like, the bank account difference is crazy.

And in fact, this should be an ugly. I actually, I groveled in, in chestnuts DMs to get him on today. I actually DMJew-Chessnut. I don't know if he's read it or not, but it's pathetic that I'm DMing competitive eaters to come on my show. I slid into Joey Chestnut's DMs. And let's see, has he seen it or not? This makes me feel better. He left you on red or?

He hasn't seen it. Oh, he hasn't? No, it says sent. It says sent. Sent yesterday. I said, hey, man, I used to play football, and I have a podcast. And I lost a fantasy bet. I have to do 24 hours in the Waffle House. I'm going tomorrow, and I lose an hour off every time I eat a waffle.

I'm trying to get out in two hours. There's a family here. I had my folks reach out to you, but I know that's tough. If you had 10 minutes to call in, we'd love it. Hail Mary. Thanks for reading. Bro, that sounds like, that literally sounds like you got hacked and he's about to get scammed, bro. Like that sounds like a savvy scammer trying to get someone to engage with them. I'm a prince, parentheses, Saudi Arabia.

Like, yeah, there was definitely. You said, I'm only trying to stay two hour. Yeah, well, that was the part that that was, that was supposed to be the hook because he was supposed to be like, oh, I've got a, I've got to. I've got a ball of clay here. He knows he's a mathematician. He's already, he's already counted up when he's, how early he's going to die this week.

But I mean, big shout out to Joey Chesda. Nothing but respect. Nothing but even more respect. These guys, this is a sport. I just want to say this. I mean,

I know that the people call it a sport, and I'm sure some people are like, that's not athletics. This shit is not for the week. That's bad. Oh, what's your ugly? Oh, am I ugly? I went on a blocking spree yesterday

on Twitter and I'm really good like this was almost uh it was like a relapse situation I've become really good at not argue with people not letting people bother me the whole thing I do when I try to fend off people who are obviously being fucking stupid whether it's like willingly or unwillingly is uh is I kind of just imagine meeting them in person and I say would I ever have this discussion with somebody in person like you probably would knowing you though they wouldn't Say it again? They wouldn't, though. With you?

Like, listen, the disagreement wouldn't bother me as much. Like, it's more of the fact that I'm like, you're written. No, no, no, no. It's really like, you really are not understanding what I'm trying to say. Like, you really are missing the point, like almost intentionally. That's why you're really frustrated. Not that somebody disagrees with me. I actually like it where people disagree with me because I like arguing.

And I also feel like if you're in the minority on something, a la green gatorage, you're right. So Tori Smith. Toy Smith shared a gift that was aggressive. It was a guy throwing trash out. And the gift was conveying his displeasure with when people send fan mail to people's houses. And I was like, oh, it's good safe tweet. I'll jump in the fray.

I don't like that either. You know, like I have answered once or twice. But generally, if you send mail to somebody's house, you looked up their address and you sent mail there. And you're expecting it not only is it like a little bit of an entitlement thing, I'm sorry, but it's also a thing that's like a little bit invasive because what you don't understand is like when you do that if I send that back I'll send a hundred autographs back and I used to before I had kids and my kids live in this house too now wait wait wait wait wait there's something to you to the house but for you to sign and send back oh yeah not like a gift like hey this would be awesome if you take

this and wear it and I see it and I know I send it to you yeah no no I send free shit which which would still be, listen, even if you send me free shit, I think this is what people don't understand. People got really mad at Tori. And then when I responded, they were like, you know, not everybody grew up with Howie Long as their dad. They have heroes nearby. I'm like, motherfucker, I don't know. You're missing the point. One, you don't need an autograph to breathe. So therefore, like, even if Howie Long wasn't my dad, I don't think I'd be out hunting autographs. But you have to know that that's the art of trolling. And three. No, no, no. These people are serious, bro. But they're trolling also, bro. They're not trolling. Look at their, they look like the people.

No, listen, bro. They want you to respond. That's like that's the new age band. And guess what, and guess what they get blocked? Because here's the deal. Pro athletes did not sign up for you to have the address where their kids live, where their wife lives. A lot of people took it as, and this is part of the problem with the whole discussion, you're an asshole because you don't sign autographs. That's not it at all. Have you ever seen me be mean to a fan? No. Have you ever seen me turn down an autograph?

And I never have. No, hold on. And I used to stay out at the 50-yard line at camp until everyone went home. After Rams games, I was the last guy. You can't ask anybody in St. Louis. But here's the thing that people don't understand. When you sent something to somebody's house, it's not that I won't write my name or that I don't value fans. It's that my kids live there.

It's that my wife lives there. And if I start answering, then more people have my address and more people are encouraged to do it. And if there's 100 fans, yes, 98 of y'all are great, but two of y'all might pull up and knock on the door. Okay? Do you have a peel box, bro? Just get a peel box. That's the point. It's so funny because you'll get called entitled for not signing autographs at your house, but you're the entitled one.

You out there. If you expect me to be happy when a fuck ton of mail shows up in my house. Look at this. You think that guy's trolling? Look at this guy. His fucking picture is him jumping to get in a picture with Carson. He didn't seem to mind. Over 40 Hall of Fame or still signed their fan mail consistently.

So would I if you had my office address. Okay. So here's what we're going to do. I'm going to have Cowboy Reid set up a green light PO box. Okay? And we'll have it to you on the next one. And listen out there, fans. If you want to send me stuff, send it on over.

Finish this one. Finish this one. Yeah, yeah. How about I put your address out there. Hey, be like them and appreciate the fans who take time to write you. You think this guy's trolling? All right. Another guy had a fucking assay and guess what I did.

It got like 16 likes, miserable likes. So you know what you did? Guess what I did? Guess what I did? You tell me, is this petty? No, you're supposed to want all 16 of them. For three minutes. Try to try.

I did block all 16 of them. Is that petty? No, hell no. Bro. Listen, here's the thing about social media. And like, and I heard this from someone else. Social media, Twitter, like my Twitter feed is like you being in my house. If I don't like you doing something.

Yeah, you shouldn't be in there. In my house, I can ask you to leave. But you know what's so funny? People feel like they won. You didn't win. I casually threw you out. And you gave me content for my podcast. That's making me money tomorrow.

You're the butt of the joke. That's the cool guy getting kicked out of the party and no one leaving with him. And he's like, yeah, like I got kicked out. That shit was bad. You can go tell, like, if you're one of the 16 people that got blocked yesterday, like, I'm sorry, but you kind of get one chance not to, like, co-sign something absolutely stupid. Here's the thing, though. Like, here's the thing I wish you did.

You're supposed to leave that up for a couple of days. So you can collect likes. Because you can see how it marinate. And that might affect other people who are on the fence to like it. And then you can get them in that block. Yeah, but I don't want to block more people. The point of arguing with somebody on Twitter is not arguing with that person. It's about arguing with all the people who are sitting there with that thought silently

and playing that argument out to give them a chance to come over to the right side. So blocking those people is just a deterrent. I don't want to block half my fans. Maybe a bunch of my fans before hearing this thought the same thing. Now you have a choice. You can either tell me you have all the answers and I'm entitled or you can realize that sending mail to a grown man's address that you looked up on like five websites and hunted down is entitled.

by nature. My thing is, it's just that, like, if you went through all the avenues that they had to do to get your address, it's just, if you're doing that, you can easily DM or instant message or Facebook or whatever, and ask and say, hey, look, I have your address. Would you mind me sending me, like, if I sent this to you? And I feel like the reason why you don't ask is because you know it's kind of shady and it's kind of weird. Like, at the end of the day, Even if I found out one of these guys addressed, if I started sending you stuff that you necessarily don't, like, don't want, like, I'm sure that I would bother you.

Like, also. Here's my policy going forward. And then we're going to move on because, you know, the edibles, you know, already probably kicked in. And it's, you know, I'm going to take some more. Because it's the best I felt this entire time. My policy is going to be, we're going to get this PO box up and running. You send me whatever you want me to sign, short of like anthrax.

I will sign it. For Dr. Fax. From 2XL, I like to wear gear and cool swag. And someone's in the bong, if you want. How about that? Start charging these people. Hey, no, how about this? If you're going to want an autograph and you want Chris or someone famous to send it back,

how about you send them something that they can keep? How about you give them a gift? You're most likely going to try to make money off a thing. No, I don't want. But it's just the effort. It's the effort. Can I say some? Yeah.

I just want to be clear on this. even if you send me shit that you're going to turn around and make $2.99 on eBay for, $2.99 because I know my shit's like going to. Hold on. I'm not going to let you do that. Can I finish? Can I finish? I'm not going to let you do that.

May I finish? So if you're going to do that, I will sign it. No questions asked. I don't care what you're selling. I don't care. I will sign it. If it goes to the PO box. But here's my deal.

I've answered a lot of Instagram DMs and said, I'll send it back to your whatever, like post is return. We love that. It's not about the money. It's about the effort. You know, it's a lot easier for us to just drop some off. Oh, yeah. And go back, post his return.

On top of that, do not DM me asking me for a signed jersey. You buy the signed jersey and send it to me, okay? It's like DMing and asking for tickets. Ignoring the price of procuring what you're asking for. It's basically like asking for a gift, okay? And I am a charitable person. I love fans. But I don't know you, man.

and I'm not taking strangers out to dinner for $60. A fucking NFL jersey cost at least $60, bro. Just see, you know, yeah, like $120 or something. Yeah. Yeah, that's, yeah. Not mine, but, you know. Some of you fans are wild. Like, yeah, just, just, guys, we said enough.

I love fans more than anything. Who doesn't? The irony is, I'm just authentic enough to tell you when you're fucked up. A lot of these big brand guys are going to smile. for a camera. They're going to sign at a public thing where they're getting paid. But if you ran up to them at a Waffle house, they just fucking look at you up and down

and ignore you. But I'm telling you how I feel and I would sign. No questions asked. If you run into me at a shopping set. This is a podcast. It comes out tomorrow. If anyone needs to know, yeah, we're at the Woffel House. No security. Hey, guys, this

is an invitation. Any of you fans want to come get an autograph? I'm at the Waffle house. Okay. Any of you. I'm here right now as I record this. There's only two in Charlottesville, so pick the right one. Oh, man, earlier, I was like, I don't know, man. If we put this thing on social, maybe like one or two people show up and nobody showed up yet. Nobody.

When you were just like, yeah, you don't post it. Like, I just don't want no one to know like so it just doesn't get crowded. I had a couple people DMing me like which waffle house. And I was again, people do that just like. just to want to know or feel like... I hate those. People do. To feel like they're in on something that, like,

that they're really not. The mailback was fun. You guys had some great questions. I don't know if anybody's ever had their mailback question answered in a waffle house before. So if you're one of the lucky few, we should probably get you in the Guinness Book of World Records. And it almost made me forget that I had like five waffles left to eat.

This was the goose. goofiest time at the Waffle House for your boy and for Dr. Fax. All right. So it's 7.14 in the evening here. I've eaten nine waffles. Everybody golf clap. All right. I know how Octa Mom felt.

Actually, an hour ago and knew how Octavon felt. Now I have nine waffles inside me. A heads up here. We got Tums. And that's a big good news. Yeah, you hear the Tums. You like ASMR if you're a misophonic.

Shout out to Makan, whatever the fuck that is. Jesus. I'm in a Waffle House with nine waffles in my belly. You think I care that you don't like people chewing? Anyways, Tums do not exceed seven in 24 hours. This is an extenuating circumstance. We got a mailback, Nate. Worst attribute as a football player from Kai.

Oh, yeah, easy. What are you got? I used to pop up out of my stance. You were a popper-up. Yeah, and that's pretty bad for DeLyman for anyone out there who isn't that into technical. But the worst thing you could do is stand straight up out of your stance, and I used to do that a lot.

I think you popped up with a lot of experience. Oh, man, there's no good way to say this. I was going to say I was looking for a replacement for you popped up hard out of your stance because you did bro and I mean nothing by that I'm just saying like you were an explosive player so I think you overcame some of that pad level shit my was I could not tackle bro holy shit if I could tackle even like if you were making a creative player you know I would like dominate a block just like fucking eat somebody's lunch throw them on the ground and then like just whiff Like, if you were creating a player in Madden and they cap that player at 55 in tackling, that was me. It was really fucked up. Tackling was actually one of my strong suits. Like, I don't know what it is.

I think it was grip strength. I think I made a lot of tackles just, like, purely off of, like, last minute jersey grab and just being able to hold on. You know, like, you did. Like, just be able to hold on that. But. Got a firm handshake. It used to work out for me.

I'll talk about firm handshakes with me. Do you remember your boy? You do it. What's that called? Adrian Peterson, try to bring up. Oh, Adrian Peterson has the hardest fucking handshake in the history of handshakes, bro. Oh, my goodness.

The first time I met him, I was like, did I do something to him? Yeah. In a game? Like, why does he remember me, bro? But no, he's just a big first impressions guy. What are your craziest superstitions? Also from Kai? Well, I always thought it was a weird superstition to pray before the game and ask for God to help you win as if God, like, believe me, I've talked to him.

But I don't think he cares who wins the football game. I don't think, like, I barely care. You can pray for help, though. Yeah, okay, that's cool. Yeah, to stay healthy, make it back to your kids healthy. I also don't think God cares about my hamstring. I think God's got enough to worry about globally. And around, you know, our country, to be fucking honest.

So, yeah, I always thought that was a weird superstition because I don't count asking for a win on the football field as a prayer. I don't think I ever had any football superstitions, but my grandmother, when we were younger, if you would drop silverware in the house, that means that you're going to have an unexpected guess. So my grandmother, if you ever drop silverware in the house, she would make all of us start cleaning up because that meant

that meant that we were going to have unexpected guests and she didn't want the house to not look up to par if that really happened. I feel like they were just like the older generation. They did a lot of amazing things. But they also made some shit up too. No, their imaginations were great. There's no way that that can even be a thing that stem from any.

Just a lot, any superstition. Dude, I used to have all sorts of dumb superstitions. We were athletes. What's your favorite website, not a lot? lot of people know about. Obviously from Kai. Oh, Kai. Kai, Kai's on fire, dude.

This guy, Kai, he is like a content farm. Lit. It's lit. I'm trying to go a little. In the future, if we ever make a Discord, you can make a more mod. A website that people don't know. Google, try it. Some of you motherfuckers, just, just, please.

It's right there on your homepage. A lot of your browsers. literally go right to that motherfucker so like and you know the thing about google is you can if you're trying to type some of the the other uh websites you could just type something in up top and your search bar is going to automatically kick in try it i got one for you guys black people meet dot com it's a great site you know if you're actively looking for friends that are black and if you are black i think what happens if you get a What was that woman's name who was white?

Rachel Dolazol situation. Oh, my goodness. Do people just rate, rate that individual down? I have no idea. I actually never been on that site, but neither have I. I don't want to be a poser in that motherfucker plus. Is that for hookups or just friends? I have no idea.

Kai asks what cities should get a pro football team? Kai, I would say St. Louis. I mean, I know it's shocking on my part, but I feel like St. Louis. The NFL kind of has their bases covered, you know? No, I think maybe like 757. Oh, you're saying Tydwater. Yeah, down there. But, like, the NFL likes to, I think you just tie it in with all the military base

and everything going on down there. If the NFL put a pro football team in the 7-5-7 just to suit, like, the military, they would be giving tickets away because they couldn't, without like a lot of guilt fucking make military people pay for tickets every week. That's not the NFL wouldn't, it wouldn't look good doing that. Maybe you're right, maybe

you're right, but you have to like set up a free deal down there. Yeah, I think they just have to find a way to marketing and it's just one of those things. You never know what football, man. Like, a lot of people really, really enjoy football.

I have to say, but another place I would say it just wouldn't work out, theoretically, is Hawaii. Any city in Hawaii needs a team, because I think every, I think it would be dope that if, if as a player, you got to travel once a year to Hawaii, you know, it's late. I do you think it would be, but it would be, okay, I got 10.

If you only played them the week before your, your, that would suck. That would suck. I feel like I've been in car crashes for like three months. Now, instead of like going home, I have to go to Hawaii for a week and then come home. When I come home, we're even more dehydrated jet lag. What's the difference? What's the difference of going to London? Like, what it's no different.

I don't want to go to London. I get it. I get it, though. But for the people who don't want to go to London, if you had to pick, if you had to go to London or go to Hawaii a couple of times, season, what would you pick? Well, if I was a West Coast team, I suppose I'd rather go to Hawaii. But if I were a West Coast team, it would be hot where I am. So, like, why would I be like, oh, I'm in Scottsdale?

I need to go warm my bones at the Hilton, Honolulu. Like, you don't even get to get in the fucking water. Your coach is going to have you in meetings. You're going to be sitting there, like, like looking at a PowerPoint. Is that how it was going to be a wave breaking out your window? And then you have curfew. Yes. Well, no. In London, you had a little more free time, but I'm saying it was a normal game week trip. Because if you were a West Coast team, going to Hawaii, they would leave two days early. That's it.

And a lot of teams go to London that way, too, now, East Coast teams. How far is that? Like, that commute. Six hours to London. And Hawaii is about equidistant, I believe, from L.A.S. and the SFO. So, you know, this is actually an unexpectedly interesting topic? I fuck with Hawaii a lot. I fuck. Who doesn't fuck with Hawaii? Some people.

Hawaii is like... People don't like planes. I guess. But that's the plane's false. Not Hawaii's fault. What other restaurants would you want to spend... Would you want to hang out for 24 hours from at Zach Stephen? You know, I don't think...

Tutsis... Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. The food there is actually incredible. It's so good. I've heard, but like, you know, I was thinking about like something really sadistic,

like a long John Silver's. Just the smell of, you know, frozen fish. You don't get in thought all day. Why not Arby's? I love Arby's, dude. Or to be honest, I would love to do Chick-fil-A, but only on Sunday. Oh, dude, let's say. Let's do it on Sunday.

Only, only, only, only, if they let us do it on Sunday, I think it'll be worth it. No chicken on the Sabbath. You like Sonic? Yeah, sure. We would just be able to chill in the car, though. Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. I could easily spend 24 hours in my car. One time I spent, like, 36 in my car.

So, Megan and I. Surfing him you want to Roller Blades. Yeah, it would be awesome. You know, and there's a thing, you know, like, they come and they go, you know? They come and they go. When have you really been to a real Sonic? Not ever. You know, that's funny.

Like, you always see Sonic commercials no matter where you're right in. Not everywhere. The guy with the face on there, he's the funniest motherfucker on TV. And I don't know anything about him. And he's the only thing I know about Sonic. And that's crazy. Like, we don't even... And it's good that way.

So Sonic's out of the picture. Sonic is out of the picture. Okay. But the car thing, I can kind of get down one. So, so you said... what restaurant did you say oh yeah long john silver just to be sadistic just find it whatever making hates and then pick the fuck out of these games this this oh that's a big how about chappell let oh oh and then the and then the same challenge

but that much oh burritos that same challenge but with burritos yeah yeah no i don't want to do one burrito would should equal okay so here's a better so here's a better so here's a better question if you've got to do this again yeah and you win the song about the waffle house playing oh yeah so if you won if this happened to get it you won against making where would you if you had your pick where would you make him do it that's a great question and what would his like kind of like food terms like you're one hour off what what option would you think a great question a hospital cafeteria is the answer It's absolutely the answer.

It is a hospital cafeteria, Matt. And just consider making in a hospital cafeteria for a moment. Everybody close their eyes and envision him. Walking to get an apple. Vigorously washing the apple, vigorously drying the apple, sitting down, reading the newspaper, crossing his legs, biting the apple. They're just on repeat. Some hospitals have really good

vending machines though, bro. Like with some like... Do they really? Like some real good stuff in it now. Like you can get some real like high price sandwiches, some stuff you can heat up in the microwave. Some religious stuff. They might be priced a dollar or two.

Well, they got you. You're in the fucking hospital. Exactly. But it's just the... Which is just an incredible dynamic. That anybody is making a profit. inside of a hospital. I mean, which is a discussion inside a discussion right now. What are your top comedians?

Top comedians. Who are the best comedians out there? So I'm a huge fan of Kat Williams. He's on my list. I'm trying to go see him in Baltimore, like in early September, when my girl, he's coming out here. Doesn't even bother me about the kid. Yo, like, it doesn't. It is what it is. It is what it is. You know what I'm saying? You know what? Like, it is. It could be, it could be, it could be, it could be worse. If there was a, listen, here's a deal.

And I think it worked better for him that he got beat up versus him beating the kid up. So it is what it is. I'm just saying this like to be like whatever. I mean, there's probably a 19 year old or a 17 year old that's as big or bigger than me that could probably catch me. Oh, I can probably catch a fade from like a big enough 19 year old. And Kat Williams to him, all those ninth graders are the size of him. they're effectively adults. Imagine being approached nine

edibles deep by a big ass thing to you. Oh, I'll, I'll edibles would be like a fucking performance enhancer for me. Everything moves slow, dude. I would just be like, you know, parrying shit in slow motion. And then I would throw them

into the principal's office. I wouldn't even strike the kid. Well, Cat Williams, Dave Chappelle, and I would say Bernie, I would say Bernie Matt. Turned back. Yep.

Well, for yours. I got, I got Dave, I got Tom Segura recently because I really like watched this shit sometimes, but I wasn't like a huge fan because I don't follow comedy. If that even makes sense, like I don't sit down and watch stand up because most of it's bad. But guess who's not bad? Fucking Tom Segura. Tom Segura is fucking hilarious and you know what makes him awesome? He's a good fucking podcast host.

He's a great podcast host. Like, he's a fucking A plus interviewer. I was on his shit, bro. He had me, like, I was, like, in a bad mood. I was on my third pod in a row. And I was like, yeah, I'm excited to talk to him. But by halfway through, I'm, like, telling him my life story. He was awesome, bro.

There's some funny ones, dude. I think J.B. Smooth is hilarious. He's been on the show. Like, if you expand to, like, comedians that are traditionally on TV shows, Like, I'm going to be able to go for days, but anyways. So right now in Chris's Waffle House challenge, he's about seven hours in, ten waffles deep. We're about to bring on Nick Beringer. He's a former nutrition professor at the United States Military Academy of West Point.

Chris wanted to know what was going on in his body, how he could put down a few more waffles. And Nick gave us some tips. Enjoy. So it is Nick Beringer. I wanted to pay my debt before the season started. And you know the whole background, but 24 hours in a waffle house, one hour off for every waffle that I do force down. It looked easy in the beginning, six waffles, 15 minutes. And it has grinded to a halt. I mean, like, it is just, it's a labor of love right now.

What's going on in my belly, man? Well, you're probably reaching capacity. Yeah. The average human stomach's about, you know, a leader. Maybe you can stretch out to three liters. You're a bigger guy. So maybe you're closer, your stomach. Maybe you could get to your mark.

But, you know, about, what do you say? You're at nine waffles now? Yeah, I'm on number 10 right now. Number 10. No, nine, yeah. So you've just essentially, you've run out of room, Chris. So, you know, I see some water there, which is good because you want to have some fluid, because what that's going to help is, you know, not to go into too much for the audience,

but some gastric emptying, which probably needs to take place, right? Yeah. The problem with those waffles, and I was looking at the nutritional information on this, there's only two grams of fiber per waffle. Oh, boy. And most people need about 30 or should be getting about 30 grams of fiber per day. Yeah, yeah. It's not a great fiber source for you.

But if you can drink some of that water and maybe. Nick just dropped a bomb on us. absolutely just change the whole, you know, the game just changed. Our best player just went out. We got no fiber, guys. You might want some fiber. Maybe a walk around a little bit, light activity to get that gastric motility happening because you've run out of room and you need to make more room if you want to eat more

waffles. Oh, my goodness. So what I did leading up to this, and I want you to tell me if I was dead wrong or not, We were doing some reading on Google, which, as you know, is always, you know, right on target. It's always, you know, WebMD. So we're looking at this thing and it says big meal the night before, you know, like big meal 18 to 24 hours prior. Stretch the stomach out and then take the rest of that period off, maybe some fruit, a little bit of fiber, which I'm really glad I got a little fiber in this morning.

were we right on target or off? You know, you got the right idea in terms of stretching the stomach. You know, there's been some folks that looked at the stomachs of Joey Chestnut and, you know, some of high-level eaters. The thing is, so basically you essentially, you were that guy who went in the weight room one time and lifted weights and thought they got a pump. I got a pump. They got a pump.

I got a pump. I'm vacation. Just getting one pump in. before you go to the beach. That's what you did because that one meal, you're not, you're not going to stretch your stomach enough. You would have to do that over time. Yeah.

So by these guys, you know, eating pounds of lettuce, you know, you know, for months and years on end in order to stretch their stomach out to get to that level. That's incredible. What else would help me get this stuff down besides fiber? Is there like, you know, you said hydration. Is there, should I squeeze some lemon in my water?

Is there any hack? Is eating thumbs helpful? Well, eating thumbs helpful might help with the heartburn that's probably going to happen, right? It's a point. And that's just because of that, you know, that spinter that you have at the, you know, the top of your stomach, it's got a lot of pressure on it. But things are going to eventually start coming up and you might already have some heartburn so that might help with that.

But as far as being able to hold anything more down, you're not going to get any more down with the thumbs, that's for sure. Yeah. Goodness gracious. So to take it off Waffles for a second, they just posted an article saying that hot dogs might be taken 35 minutes off your life every time you consume an hot dog. And you as being a nutritionist, how do you, like, how do you get that type of number? And if there is a scale for that, how many minutes would you say a waffle probably taking off your life?

I've never been to ask that question in my, you know, nearly 20 years of being a dietitian. That's why you're the best question. How they get that number is, you know, they do a lot of studies and a lot of surveys. And to be fair with all this, is it's association, not always causation. So they say, okay, these people who die ate a lot of hot dogs. But to be true. Right. To be tricky, it's kind of like, what is it, murders and ice cream cells in the summertime. They both go up.

Right. Or people killing each other because ice cream, probably not. Yeah. That's a great way of putting it. Yeah. So, you know, so again, we don't know. Now, is a hot dog probably a health food? No, I'm not going to go that far.

But that's where that number comes from. Now, back to the waffle. You know, the waffle in moderation probably not as bad. Now, what you guys are doing where you're eating a lot of waffles, you're overloading your bodies with carbohydrates. You can only oxidize about 90 grams per hour. Each one of those waffles has 55 grams of carbs. So you're probably, you know, well exceeding that.

If you were to do that long term, you'd set yourself up for type two diabetes, right? That's what's going to happen. Probably be a diabetic. One of the types I think walking out of this place. This one time, it would be interesting if you had glucose monitors on because I would fully expect your blood glucose to be, you know, oh boy. Well, higher than what it is. Oh, I'm going to be here to one a.m. So my favorite waitress here said that soda was better for digestion,

because of like burp logic, you know, it's like clears room because of the burps. And I believed her because I wanted a sprite, but, you know, what do you say? Yeah, that's, that's, that's, that's some waffle house logic right there. You didn't stay at Holiday Head Express. Yeah, the science doesn't add up because you're putting carbon dioxide in your stomach. So that's going to, you know, some gas is basically. Yeah.

Now, maybe, you know, when you burp it out, no extra gas is coming with that. There's a frog in the window. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. There's a frog on the window of the Waffle house. So it's like right behind you on the zoo. Don't eat that. No, okay.

Yeah, well, I get it's outside the Waffle House. So listen, I'm not allowed to go there. Hey, Matt's got a quote. You know, worm. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that healthy? Is that dangerous? What?

Night crawler. Like a Canadian night crawler, basic, like basic, you eat worms. No, I don't eat them, but so we had a guy from Jackass on our show. Okay. Yeah, and so that just explains it. I don't even have to probably tell you much more. But we, you know, we, we, we, they fed us bugs and they, you know, we had Canadian night crawlers and a couple crickets. And I've seen less drought do it.

I've seen, you know, bear grills do it. You know, what is that? What's going on with that? So, so bugs are a great source of protein and sustainable. There's some protein bar companies now using cricket protein. Cricket protein, you know, really. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I can't think of the name, of course, off the top of my head, but I can, you know, send it to, to read or whoever. But yeah, there's a protein cricket bar company. So it is a cheap, you know, a form of protein that's safe. Now, with some bugs, are they carrying any parasites or anything like that? There was a case in Australia of a kid who ate a slug that was containing a parasite and he got really sick. So as long as it doesn't have a parasite in that bug,

you'd probably be okay if it's it's yeah and i would i would know by now you would know by now probably yeah there we go see the crickets are great yeah a lot of people that's the second thing first he basically told me like you're done eating waffles man like there's no more room and you're not eating fiber and now i was thinking i was going to die because of the nightcrawler not the waffles so nick you're the man dude this is this has been informative we needed the laugh in here and uh and we hope to talk to you again if there's ever a nutritional uh debate going on. Can we hit you up? Anytime. Always happy to settle it.

For the best. Thank you so much. All right. Thanks. So that was a lot of fun. And I can guarantee you I will not be back there next year. Guarantee. Now, I will be, I'll be outside that motherfucker with a lawn chair, tapping on the glass at Macon like he's a gerbil. And he's going to be in there all 24 hours because I don't think he could finish a single waffle. But we'll talk more about Macon's date in a year at the Waffle House on Monday. I just want to let you all know I'm okay.

And actually, I'll go a step further. I will guarantee that it will not be me next year. I'm guaranteeing a victory. You know, Joe Namath style. No Matt Hasselbeck. I mean, I want the ball. I'm going to score. Macon is not my Al Harris.

It's not going to be me there at that Waffle House. Last night I felt awful when I got home. But it was nice to feel the humidity outside, opened the windows and drive back to my family. I walked up and down the driveway for probably a period of 45 minutes editing the podcast. And I think I kickstarted my metabolism because when I got inside, I took an enormous shit. I don't want to mince words here. You made it this far.

Then I woke up at 5.30 as well and did more business today. anyways, that's not what you came to hear about. But I'm okay. I haven't eaten since the Waffle House. That's intentional. I've been fasting. I've been exercising. I've been walking.

I've been on my feet. And I feel great. So if it ever happens to you, just know you've got to bear down, get it done. Next day, it'll be back to normal. And I will be back with Macon on Tuesday. Okay?

And we've got a very special guest. I went from the Waffle House to Big Aristotle. Today I got to interview Shaq Shaquille O'Neal, Dr. O'Neal. He is one of the newest win brand ambassadors, which means technically we're co-workers. All right? So that's pretty cool for Shaq.

It's a joke. I'll see y'all Tuesday, and Shaq will be on that show. So something to look forward to. Tell a friend. Hey, just a reminder here, we're trying to run a business. We're trying to be successful. please follow Chalk Network on Twitter and Instagram and Chalk Media on YouTube for more content from the Greenlight podcast with yours truly Chris Long. Thank you kindly.