Habits and Hustle - Episode 204: Fail Your Way To The Top 

Episode Date: January 7, 2023

In this week’s solo episode, Jennifer discusses how failure can be reframed as a positive and lead to your ultimate success. She then dives into the benefits of mediocracy, how the fitness industry works, tips on breathwork and more.   Find out Jen’s secret to getting anything you want out of life Join Jen’s new Facebook group! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Did you learn something from tuning in today? Please pay it forward and write us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts.  📧If you have feedback for the show, please email [e-mail]  📙Get yourself a copy of Jennifer Cohen’s newest book from Habit Nest, Badass Body Goals Journal.  ℹ️Habits & Hustle Website - http://habitshustle.com 📚Habit Nest Website - https://habitnest.com/  📱Follow Jennifer - Instagram - https://instagram.com/therealjencohen - Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/therealjencohen - Twitter - https://twitter.com/therealjencohen - Jennifer’s Website - https://jennifercohen.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Join the millions of businesses growing on Shopify and ignite your selling. Less f***ing more. Start your free trial today at shopify.com slash special offer 23 shopify.com slash special offer 23. Hi everybody, this is my third solo quasi solo duo episode for the podcast. I'm getting a little bit more comfortable doing it, not completely, but a little bit better. I'm just saying off camera, that is, by the way, it's freezing in LA. It's been freezing here for weeks. And I'm always wearing like 60 sweaters and parkas.

And my foil, who I aka Shawnee, otherwise known as a foil, she's like a guy. It's like, it's so cold in here and she's like, it is so hot. It is so hot. We fight over the eight degrees. Let's get out of six degrees. We fight over the temperature.

It's way, it's like 60 degrees in there. You're from Canada. How did you survive? My blood has become super thin, where I feel like I literally doubt, like it's been like the North Pole. I feel like I'm in Antarctica for the last like two and a half weeks.

It's been really rainy and gloomy here. I'm not complaining about that. I think we need the rain, but I think that my blood, I've become so accolade to living in California that now, this has become, it's become so cool. Like my blood is so thin. I used to live, by the way, for those of you who don't know. I'm from Winnipeg, where it was literally minus 40

with the windshield, minus 40. It's probably one of the coldest places on the planet. Imagine you there right now, you would die. I would probably, I would be, I would actually be very blue. Like you, you, you, so, My lips turned blue. Yeah, so I could, yeah, I could see

that you're very cold, I'm sorry. Well, I just feel like I've got poor Circulation. That's what it is obviously because my appendages and my lips turn blue looks like I had like a jolly rancher or like a job Breaker, but perhaps a trampoline would solve it. Maybe that's more for your what's good for circulation? Trampolines are actually very good for circulation. They're also great for your lymphatic drainage system. Like, for... It's great for... Also, if you're constipated, because it gets things moving along,

I love the trampoline. I have, like, by the way, another little fun fact. I have, like, five trampolines around the house. I have a couple outside. I have one in my office. I have one in my gym, because... Actually, more because I have a friend who works as a trampoline company and he just keeps on giving me and my kids trampolines.

But they're super, they're a great way to get your blood move, your energy chain, the mental state of your mental state change, the blood circulating. We're totally digressing them. This is not what the podcast is supposed to be about, but yeah, that's just a quick shout out for jump sport. I love them. That's not a paid ad. That's just me really liking a trampoline. But anyway, that is not what we're talking about today.

Today we're going to be talking about failure and the benefits of blowing it and reframing how we think of failure so that we can go out and conquer and go after those goals that we want to go after and basically create the life we want. And so that is what we're gonna be dealing with today. And what I've been doing with these solos is picking something out of the book that I think that a lot of people can relate to,

that it can resonate with a lot of people, and then basically expanding on it or just talking about it. And I think failure is a really big one because all of us at some point have failed. Most of us fail regularly, like me. And I think it's really important to reframe how we think about that. And I like to say that the really a great way that worked for me in my life is that when I think about failure, I think about it as an attempt, like my first attempt at something. You know, my first attempt, my second attempt, my third attempt. And that way, we don't look at it as such a jarring,

you know, jolt to our system. And I think a lot of things in life is perspective and how we think about things and how we frame things in our thoughts and therefore our thoughts become our actions and vice versa. But it's really a shame when we count ourselves out before even giving ourselves a shot because we are so afraid of that rejection and that failure that we don't even attempt. So from now on I call failures attempts and I think that is something that you guys should try who are listening to this podcast

and I think that could be very helpful and beneficial moving forward to whatever you're trying to achieve. And this can be both professionally, this can be personally. One thing, again, I want to make a mention. This why I'm doing this, why I wrote the book, why I had this podcast. Of course, it's about leveling up your life and self-actualizing and, I guess, technically being, quote-unquote, a better version of yourself. Isn't only for success vis-a-vis money, career, power. It's not, that can be for some people, but I think that success is very different to everybody.

And you have to figure out what success means to you and what's important to you. And then you reverse engineer about how to get there and then you're gonna be really bold about going after it. And that is how you create the life you want, and not just kind of acquiesce to the life in front of you. And part of that is about failing, and the idea of reframing and changing the way

we look at failure, that's why it's so important, because it's inevitable. Everybody fails. Everybody. Shawnee, I bet you even failed once or twice it's inevitable. Everybody fails. Everybody. Shawnee, I bet you even failed once or twice. I failed many a times. Yes. Pick myself back up.

Failed again. And failed again. And this is something else I want to say that we actually, and in fact, actually, I believe this to be a major, major pillar is that, and I talk about this too, is the fact that the people who are more mediocre, people who are more average actually, are much more adept to failing because they had to do it over and over again, and that has actually helped to serve you later on. Like, I'm very average in everything. I'm not really exceptional really in much.

I'm not exceptionally talented. I'm not exceptionally brilliant. I'm not exceptionally anything. But because of that, it's actually like, I've had to learn to be resourceful. And when I failed, now when I failed, the fall isn't so far down that I'm so much more susceptible. I'm not, I become like to sensitize

and immune to what the feeling is. So I keep on going after it. So don't just think because you're not talented or smart or whatever it is that we should, that shouldn't deter you from trying to do whatever it is you have to do. In fact, look at it as a benefit. That's what I also wanted to say.

Hmm, I like that. Thank you. I like that a lot. Keep coming back. You got plenty of space. Oof, not how you would have done that. You like working with people you can rely on, like USAA, who has helped guide the military community

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Vitamin water's zero sugar, nourishoubt you. Grab a with love today. Vitamin water zero sugar, nourish every you. Vitamin water is a registered trademark of glass O. I mean we can talk a little bit more about um mediocrity too. Yeah because that's a big theme that you always discuss right? Yeah you don't necessarily have to have the talent, the skill, the beauty, the this, that, the other, that you can just be bold. You just have to be bold, but I, 100 percent, it's all about being bold. I think boldness is the secret sauce to success, but one of the, one of the principles in my book is about how mediocrity is a strength, because it is a strength, like I just said. You know, the people who are too smart tend to,

like I just said, you know, the people who are too smart tend to, they tend to have gotten things, kind of like things kind of they never had to work as hard as other people, so things kind of just always happen for them so much more easily. So when they do fail or something doesn't work out, the fall is so much more grandiose and so much more heart-wrenching. So, you know, it's much harder to get back up a lot of times. That resilient hasn't been built into their system or their DNA

because it hasn't had to be that, it had to work that muscle as hard as much versus the people who are much more mediocre, have grown up having to struggle a little bit more and to work harder mediocre, grown up having to struggle a little bit more and to work harder and figure out the window to go through because the door was shut. It's like that whole ability to be more nimble and resourceful basically comes from mediocrity because you have to figure shit out. And so that's why to me I think that if we can again, it's all about reframing and how we see things, the perception of how we see things, it's all about reframing and how we see things. The perception of how we see things, how we think about things really does change the

way we then act. So perception is so important to ourselves. Not so much, I'm not talking about the perception like what others, I'm talking about your own perception or how you kind of Explain things in your own brain like doing a lot of talking in my brain is very important like if I If something happens and I'm unhappy about it which happens with life a lot all the time And then I think about another way I can think about that thing in a way that kind of makes me feel better And then I it changes your entire mental state Absolutely say it's a paradigm shift. It is it changes your entire mental state. Absolutely.

Say it's a paradigm shift. It is a paradigm shift, right? These little things. Are you a big breather? Like do you breathe a lot? I do. I mean, breath breathing. Yes, as an ex-exit, I have been you go around the world

like holding your breath. I do tend to breathe, you know, from time to time. I've been known to breathe. I do. I like to breathe a lot. I had, there was that book a while back that I forgot what the game's next. James Nester.

Yeah, that's work. No, the Seven Habits of highly effective people, where he talks about paradigm shifts. And that really helps me a lot in terms of like that, do you read that story about how like there was these crazy kids on the subway that were really like going crazy and they were bothering everybody. And people thought that it was was insane and the dad wasn't doing anything about it and the dad just seemed like unfazed and then somebody spoke to him and the guy was like, the dad said, sorry,

I, we just left the hospital, their mother just passed away. My wife just passed away. I'm kind of just like, days, like I just don't really know what to do, you know what I mean? And it just makes you think, like you never really know what's happening, you know what I mean? And it just makes you think, like you never really know what's happening in someone's day or in reality. And when you paradigm shift anything, if you do that with your day-to-day life, like it can really change everything.

But yes, breathing, I do breathe also. I like to take a deep breath sometimes time. I'm talking about it, but yes, okay. Yeah, you're talking about like the breathing, I'm like the whim-hoffee vibes. Not just whim-hoffee is a million breathing techniques. I think we can get too fancy with this thing, that thing. Something super simple that people can do is just like four deep breaths in and then

holding for a count of four and then a four second, like a four second breath in. I'm sorry, I did not four deep breaths. I mean, one deep breath in for four seconds, holding for four seconds, and then exhaling for four seconds, it's called like four, four, four. Yeah, we do that a few days soon. Yeah, it's a big one. Like, I think it's an easy one to adapt

and anyone can do it. We don't have to be super, I don't know. Like, is that to be fancy? You don't have to take a core of her, yeah. Right, it doesn't have to be like, oh, like, you know, like, now I'm going to take like this like nine-week course on breath work. Yes, you can if you're like super interested in it and you want to do it.

But like, just doing something super basic, like the basics always work the best, in my opinion. They always work the best. And yet people try to over-fansify if that's a word, like over-fansy, things that are just like simple at its core work, just fine. It's a fitness business too. Yeah. Text us to receive up to five automated marketing text

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At the end of the day, the fitness business is really broken down into very, it's very basic. It's a squat, it's a lunge, it's a push, it's a pull, and it's like, you know, that's based at a plank, you know what I mean? And like some core move, which is, you know, and then you kind of like create some variety around that. You can do a reverse lunge. You can do a forward lunge. But it's all those are the core, those are the basic moves and then you just kind of build on them.

But yet this entire, this is a whole other thing altogether. But the entire multi billion dollar industry of fitness is based around selling people magic bullets and giving people this idea of how to make it, how do I change the most basic things into some kind of marketing schema where I can make money. When it's all the same, any exercise program and I've done every single one, I've tried them, I've seen them, I've wrote about them,

I've whatever else, they're all the same. It's just like a different order of exercises. Instead of doing the variety of a squat first, you do the lunch first. You know what I mean? As long as you're moving and exercising, who cares what you're doing? But just it all is coming down for the fundamentals.

So save your money. It's basically what I'm saying. Do a squat, do a lunge, and be done. You know? Oh yeah. And fail at the squats and lunge, and then just get back up and do them again. 100% just do the bien.

And if you focus on anything, just do it really well. Like focus on the form. You know, like the Kobe Bryant would always talk about, you know, he spent what spent hours a day just shooting, just like standing there and just shooting the ball into the net. I mean, that's what it was over and over and over again, because if you can't do the fundamental basic thing first, how do you move on to do something else? But sometimes the basics are, number one, just master the basics. Don't start doing a squat with like a hundred pound weight.

If you can't even do a proper squat with a body weight or like a body weight. Yeah, yeah. It gets more effective to do a really, really good body weight squat properly than doing a squat with a hundred pound dumbbell and doing it with imbalance and with bad form, you're just gonna hurt yourself and you're gonna be injured and that no one wants that. How did we start talking about this? I don't know, but you know what's really hard to fix

is buttwink. I think we should do a video about that by the way. That's a buttwink. You know when you do the squat and you get to the bottom and then you sort of tilt inward and like it's so hard to fit. It took me years to be able to not do that. I've no idea what you're talking about.

I'll show you an example after. But anyways, yeah, we did get on this topic. I'm not sure how much. I don't know. Let's go back. So basically, if you fail, just look at it differently and keep on going. That's all. That's the moral of this story.

Yeah, the moral of this story is, you know, be a failure, you know, and the more you fail, the better you're going to be at it. If you're mediocre, all the power to you, that means you're going to be something one day. That's basically the moral of the story. Yeah, that's a good moral. And join the Facebook group, please. Link is in the description. Right. Join the Facebook group.

Oh, yeah. And also, by the book, if you haven't already, it's called Bigger Better Bolder. I have 16 principles broken down about how you can be more bold. And I have a workbook to keep you accountable, to keep you, to keep you or get you to where you need to be. I'm not just like yammering on like I am right now, but there's actionable things that I put out, I put you to work to get you to be better

at being bold. This episode is brought to you by the YAP Media Podcast Network. I'm Holla Taha, CEO of the award-winning digital media empire YAP Media, and host of YAP Young & Profiting Podcast, a number one entrepreneurship and self-improvement podcast where you can listen, learn, and profit. On Young & Profiting podcast, I interview the brightest minds in the world, and I turn their wisdom into actionable advice that you can use in your daily life. Each week, we dive into a new topic like the art of side hustles,

how to level up your influence and persuasion and goal setting. I interview A-list guests on Young and Profiting. I've got the best guest. Like the world's number one negotiation expert Chris Voss shark Damon John serial entrepreneurs Alex and Leila Hermosi and even movie stars like Matthew McConaughey There's absolutely no fluff on my podcast and that's on purpose Every episode is jam packed with advice that's gonna push your life forward. I do my research I get straight to the point, and I take things really seriously, which is why I'm known as the podcast princess, and how I became one of the top podcasters in the world in less than five years. Young and profiting podcasts is for all ages.

Don't let the name fool you. It's an advanced show. As long as you want to learn and level up, you will be forever young. So join podcast royalty and subscribe to Young and Profiting Podcast. Or, yeah, like it's often called by my app fam on Apple Spotify Cast Box or wherever you listen to your podcast. You're getting a diploma. You can't eat a diploma, but you can eat wings and charles. Get 23% off any order of 30 or 50 piece wings when you use promo code 23 grad at Charlie's dot com. That's promo code 23GRAD at Charlie's dot com. Charlie's has wings.

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