Habits and Hustle - Episode 63: Jo Frost – The Supernanny, Global Parenting Expert, and Author

Episode Date: May 12, 2020

Joanne Frost is a TV personality from Supernanny UK, Global Parenting Expert, and best selling author. This the perfect episode for all parents during COVID-19. As coronavirus has families all cooped in, she discusses the parental challenges that have now been magnified. She emphasizes how parents can be listening more to their children’s needs and she sheds light on how important it is to keep your spirits high during this difficult time. You don’t want to miss this great episode! Youtube Link to this Episode  Jo Frost’s Instagram Jo Frost’s Website ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Did you learn something from tuning in today? Please pay it forward and write us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts. 📧If you have feedback for the show, please email [e-mail]  📙Get yourself a copy of Jennifer Cohen’s newest book from Habit Nest, Badass Body Goals Journal. ℹ️Habits & Hustle Website 📚Habit Nest Website 📱Follow Jennifer – Instagram – Facebook – Twitter – Jennifer’s Website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to the Habits and Hustle Podcast. A podcast that uncovers the rituals, unspoken habits, and mindsets of extraordinary people. A podcast powered by Habit Nest. Now here's your host, Jennifer Cohen. I have the global international parenting expert, galore, Joe Frost, otherwise known as a super nanny. You're in your eight season of doing the show on lifetime

correct. Yes, that's true. And I think that your information right now, especially what we're going through, we're kind of like, we're kind of getting out of the woods right now with the spend, with the COVID-19 lockdown, but still it's been a trying time for anybody who's a parent. It's been a trying time for anybody who's a parent or not or not. I was gonna say or not You're doing this for the first time right absolutely. That's absolutely a good point I will say though for those who are parents. It's it's it's been extremely difficult to work and also homeschool and Have everybody like contained in a very lot of time in a small and perfect picture. Sorry. Yeah, absolutely. So this is why I'm actually very happy to have you on this podcast, how it's in household, because we have a lot

I'm sure a lot of people are struggling with this. So the first question I have is, what and how have we, I've got so many questions. What are we supposed to do? Like, you know what, the big joke is, we keep on saying if the coronavirus won't kill you, hope schooling will, right? We're not, I mean, I was a bad student in school as it was. I could barely understand my child's like, you know,

first grade homework. How are we supposed to be effective parents and also do our job while keeping our kids entertained? What you come back to is the importance of understanding what you do have rather than what you don't have. At the end of the day, we are in a crisis trying to homeschool the best we can, not homeschool, right?

And for all of those parents who are homeschooling and have homeschooled for many years, they'll know that the president is very different with respect to the hours that they are focused on doing that schoolwork and the other outlets that build the curriculum for homeschooling the many children they do have. But yes, it did hit us seven weeks with how am I going to create this ideal picture that becomes a reality for me of meeting 100% in every box and the simple truth is you can't. Right. You can't meet 100% and check off every box, it's not possible. But what you can do is come to a place instead of beating yourself up,

is a reality of what you can do. And to do the best that you can under a structure that does facilitate you doing the best you can with respect to the homeschooling and the assignments you are being given. To understand that you are not your children's entertainer, puppeteer, and that for you to have this time at home where you can take an opportunity to come around the dining table together and have breakfastes and lunches and mill times,

which let's face it was a lost art for many families who were working because they never prioritized a such. It's now something that can be put in with recognizing also your children's body clock. So for younger children, you know, they wake up like most of us, hopefully with a good night's sleep, of being more sprightly and ready to learn. And there's a reason why those schools hit the creative stuff in the afternoon, because our body peaks, as you know, it has those peak performance times and moments when you don't.

And so I think it's important to be able to recognise number one. You're not going to hit 100% on every box. Number two, that doing your best is good enough in how you fit in your children's assignments and what you really simply can do and then to also recognise that on any given day, you're not going to be able to keep every kid happy at every moment. You know, I think we can set ourselves up with expectations to spin a thousand plates in a culture that rewards a mother, a father that does as such. You know, that old saying, wow, guess what she's, you know, she's spinning 30 plates over there, but look at her. She, you know, mother looked drained.

She looks tired. She has no patience. She's now resorted to yelling at her kids. She's getting no sleep. She's put herself on the back burner, she's trying to keep everybody happy and no ones happy because she's not even happy at all in what she's doing. And there's a real, there's a realness about that. You know, there's the reality of a circumstance that's uncharted waters and the, you know, the realistic expectations that we put on ourselves, as there it is, period. That's a good, why is it that in today's time,

it's all about over scheduling your kids, right? And to feel like you're doing a good job as a parent or to feel like you're a good parent, you have to kind of put your kids schedule is like over scheduled and you have to kind of put your kids schedule is like over-scheduled and you have to be giving them so many activities, so many different like external things to kind of busy them. What's the narrative that got sold in this country? You know, we see it everywhere media outlets, parenting magazines, you are a wonderful parent. You're the best parent.

How to make your kids succeed. How to make them really happy. You know, the billion dollar parenting enterprise, right, of, of, um, the trickery, right, of feeling that you're doing the best by your trial, if you can do X, Y and Z for them. And the reality is, is that the simplest of things are what allows you to connect to your children and bring the most uncomplicated things that are happy, you know, for you as a family, you know, being productive in the morning and getting up and, you know, making your bed is the first task in the morning. You know, understanding the importance of providing free steady meals and a couple of snacks in between is making a conscious decision to eat well as a family, to be active, to be moving, you know, to do things together to understand the importance of sleep. And yet, let's face it,

we're a hustled country. You know, we go a thousand miles an hour. Right now, Mother Nature has said to us, stop. You better breathe because I'm taking a breath right now. And this is not to minimise and I've said this to many people, this is not to minimise the pandemic that is happening and what we are going through right now. But I do hope as somebody that has spent 30 years inside families homes around the world, I truly do hope for one moment. This is bringing us closer to some profound realization. What truly is important to our family? What truly is a priority? And what has made us happier since we have been by government, state, country in lockdown? What have I valued? What state, country in lockdown.

What have I valued? What have I invested in? What did I do that actually has made me feel more content as a parent raising my kids? I noticed my teenager is happier. I feel like my younger ones are learning more life skills. So I think this is a moment of being able to recognize that none of this time is wasted. We're not just existing to get through the pandemic, but actually this is a very this is a very you know, pie glass for rather than unful moment.

But many families you know and if we can continue to be, I would say, in gratitude, right, to practice, like I say to many families, it's the consistency of something that we do and understanding what we need to do to provide that consistency. That leads to us feeling that that was a success for us. However you define success. So, you know, families may say to me, well, you know, we're not really getting enough sleep. We're sleep deprived. But a lot of families were sleep deprived before this pandemic.

So what do we need to do within our structure, our daily routine, to make it a priority of us getting the sleep that we need, so that we're able to in a healthy manner, not just enjoy the day, but to also allow us to be in a space where mentally, where we are providing what is well for our family because we know even scientifically that sleep is the number one priority in any form of health to any family and what the that what the detriment of that is. So why don't we start let's talk about structure because I'm a big fan of that right for myself and for my kids and from a very young age I thought that putting them on a routine and a structure makes kids feel safe and

Kind of keeps things in line, right? How do people start building a structure that sustainable and that actually That they can actually work day-to-day because I feel like that's kind of where things begin to kind of spiral at a control when you don't have that. It's true believe it or not most people you with me know how to make a daily routine because to some degree we have a daily routine whether it serves not we do have so of a routine a pattern whatever, whatever that is. For most families, it's dictated around the school, the cornerstones, what I call the cornerstones, that become we, right? They're the cornerstones of how we together are functioning as a family, and meeting the needs, and the priorities,

of each individual child, whatever their age is. So, you know, we take a look at that. So, are we a family with teenagers and younger children? Do we have children at home or are they at school? And based on those that have external circumstances, whether it's scheduling or school, and we start to create the cornerstones. So whatever time school starts, one needs to recognize what needs to happen before that, and you start to work backwards. So I do this a lot with many families that have been helping on the Supernanny show, as you know, I've been filming around America doing season eight, and they see it in the

300 countries, right? I mean, I believe the Supernanny show alone, and I've got six different shows, but and they're all over the world. But I believe Supernanny is in now 149 territories around the world. So we're in six continents. Oh wow, yeah, I saw a number like 300 countries.

It must be a combination of all these other things that you do. Yeah, we're everywhere, yeah. countries. It must be a combination of all these other things that you do. Yeah, we're everywhere. I want to ask you about that afterwards. It takes a team of us. Oh, God, yeah. I'm curious about that. But finish about the schedule, how people can start

to build a healthy schedule. You know, start with the cornerstones. It's when the children have school. What kind of curriculum do they have with outside activities? Working backwards from those pin cornerstones. So you know if our children have to be out with door by 830 to be at school by 9 then what does that mean as far as getting dressed preparation? Organization breakfast and working backwards to the time

that they would be waking up. And then we go backwards even more because based on their age, we want to support the amount of sleep that they need, whether that's 12 hours, 10 hours, 8 hours, and that sets the parameter for the night before in what time the children should be going to bed. So already we've top and tell a routine. And the filler becomes when the children are home and the meal times. So a consistent meal time for most families

will create, you know, blood sugar level, keeping on an even kill. It won't allow mothers to get to that four-club crunch of a cup of tea and a few pieces of chocolate and something sweet, right? Or kids, kids temperaments, you know, and should I say undesired behaviour because you cut the toast in squares rather than triangles, you know, because they weren't given, you know, mill times that really supported their body clock as such. So again, with the structure of mill times, the structure of the external classes, schooling, and with so we are able to fit in based on age,

early learning, early learning gains and toys to do with young in the morning, my men nursery and music in the afternoon and creative and art stuff, as well as making sure that our kids are out, outdoors and moving. So if we think about the pandemic now and homesfalling and having a moment to do work and to make sure that our kids are getting at least a couple of hours

in, of doing homesfalling, again what we would see is we would substitute the homeschool for the place where we would be at school. So we can get our kids up having had a good night's sleep. You know, we've prepared and organized what they're gonna wear in the morning. What we create is more self-discipline. And I think really with anything, can I know talking to yourself and an expert in your own field,

that anything that we do that's consistent starts with this muscle self. Absolutely. And you just said something, I feel like's consistent starts with this muscle itself. Absolutely. And you just said something. I feel like a big theme with this podcast and a lot of what a lot of people talk about and they mention, especially a lot of high performers, people who've succeeded and all sorts of things. It's not about, it comes down to one thing and it's discipline and self-discipline.

And I think it all starts with that. And how do you start to ingrain that in a young child? How do you start? Besides, I think it's a positive, positive being productive and having a ritual, you know, and having a ritual. I've had my grandson here for the last two months. How old are you? He's coming up to six. Okay, let's get my daughter to five, so it's perfect for me. So it's just coming up to six. It's just shy of being six years old. And, you know, he's been into a routine here. If you know, it gets up, he makes his bed. That's the first task done. You know, and then he's washing hands and brushing teeth and getting dressed and coming to the table

and we're having breakfast together. There is a gratitude that we have, you know, with Papa and Annie Jo and himself. We're talking about what we're thankful for for the day over breakfast, what we're going to be gratitude for. So, you know, there's rituals and they're baby steps because it's not given to all of us, we build that. We're not given a big sack of willpower, we're not given a big abundance of determination, we just take one step, we just take one step forward and say today we did it and tomorrow we'll do it and the next day we'll do it and it's

very realistic with how much you bite off because if you try to over accomplish again you can sabotage yourself so it's being realistic with what you can do start off with just a few just a few steps and I have families who you know in the first day become, you know, very overconfident and you wouldn't think that I used that word of overconfidence but they're like, right now I want to go five steps and I'm like, you wouldn't try and make a baby run, would you before they could stand up? So again, it's being realistic with just baby steps and the practice and the ritual of being able to do that. If you lead by example, children

have a wonderful way of making you have to stand up and do things even if you're hearing that voice saying, God really do with a love of half an hour in bed. Right. And it's when you're leading by example, you recognize very clearly that that's an opportunity to keep going, even if it's for this, like, at that moment, it does you good as well. Right. For families that are taking walks right now

in their daily routine, you know, some families may be feeling, you know, I'm really tired right now and to do a three and a half mile walk for an hour, maybe, you know, something I could do without. But again, you're leading the example and there are many benefits of being able to do that and you'll feel really good once you've done it. And I mean, really good meaning. You'll be proud of yourself that you've done it.

You might not physically feel good because not everything we do or any change that we make feels great in the beginning. Sometimes it feels really shitty. You know, and most people will tell you if you know they're trying to keep themselves fit or they're trying to you know work on every day having a new pattern or ritual. It doesn't feel that brilliant in the beginning. Sometimes it really feels like tough and it would be easier to go back to the old blanket you've been used to. But it's taking just that baby step forward and being realistic that if we take bite sizes of what we do, we can then just add small, small. But again, we live in a world that wants to sell us

immediate gratification. We are sold by commercials that say to us, we can lose 50 pounds in three weeks. And why don't you do this? And hey, your children will be doing this in one day. And we're not being real with the reality. It took you how long to be in this situation. It's going to take you some moments to get into that swing of the practice to result.

So that's I like that. So what age is too young or what to start with? Baby steps of teaching someone in neat discipline. What age can you start that process? I think we do it from a young age. I think we do it from a young age. I think we do it from the beginning with children past that first. From nine to ten months, I think we're beginning to teach our children already. You know what I mean? Okay, about. Really young.

If you think about it, we're saying we're distracting our children from touching certain things, from having a little bit more patience when they throw things over the high chair. We bring it back again and say, let that here, let's read a book and you read this here. So I think again, we start from a very young age, not being very conscious of the fact that we're doing that, when we get to 18 months and 20 months, well, I pick on brick up, you pick another brick up. Come and let's help mommy and we'll tidy up. But daddy's going to take the stuff out,

you take that stuff and I'll take that one. So I think we do it from a very young age and get an art kids involved and get them very productive. And there's small little things that they can do that benefit them in a very fun learning way. Yeah, I like that. I feel like what I feel happens a lot,

even with all this stuff that I try to practice more or less, I mean, obviously sometimes more, sometimes less. I feel like I, people of myself and other people say all the time when I was, when I actually was, I knew I was having you on, I was asking friends of my questions, like, what do you think I should ask the soup, you know, Joe Frost, the super nanny. People don't listen. I have to repeat myself over and over and over again to get my kids to actually listen. It's not first time listening around here or a lot of other people.

But why? It fathoms me why any parent feels that the children should listen once. I know what that's what I'm asking you. What do you think? You're the expert. No, I mean, I think it's unrealistic. I'm absolutely fathomed by parents have an expectation to say something once to a small child and think that they would just go off and do it.

They're not robots. Like, to me, it's totally unreasonable for any parent to think that they would ask a small child to do something and then the child just go off immediately and do so when I have to teach most parents to talk to their children's face because they ask things to the back of their heads. The child will be playing and they'll be like, oh Charlotte, can you go and put that over there please? Hahaha.

Did you just talk to Charlotte's back of their head? Or the mom's, you know, the mother being the kitchen. She'll be like, Tommy coming now, it's Dylan coming. Hahaha. Hahaha. Hahaha. Now it's dimmin' time. No, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. I want a megaphone with that. Oh, that's so true.

When children are really little, what's most important is that interaction and communication face to face, you know, so that we have clear communication. They can, they need to obviously sharpen their auditorial skills through the practice. But what happens is that parents don't even realize they're talking to the back of their children's heads, their children are focused on what they're playing. They give them a time to finish and think that they're just going to finish on their own,

when no young child is going to finish on their own, they're going to wait because they're focused in enjoying what they're doing. And I use something called the speaking clock, which gives a sort of time breakdown. So if a children were playing with something and it was going to be a meal time, you would go into the room, call their name, have them look up, and then say to them, you know, in 10 minutes I'm going to come back and let you know that you need to come to the table wash hands because it's going to be dinner time. And what happens is that parents don't do that. They get lazy, they shout, they talk to the back of the head, and then what happens is they yell, when they yell they startle the child because and I have to say I'm glad for this but not for the yelling, parents are seeking in thinking my word,

you know, it's taboo for me to smack which I'm hoping parents are understanding, which I'm hoping parents are understanding not gonna get you anywhere, outdated practice. And so they yell, but as soon as they yell, you look mad, you look santic. You're like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, right, you startled the child, they look up at you and you're like, get to the room now.

And they're like, what? And then that's how they learn. And that's how you learn to, get to the room now and they're like, what? And then that's how they learn. And that's how you learn to only get a response from your child when you've raised your voice. And when you've gone to that place, that's the only time then you get a response from them. And so I spend time weaning the parent back as in clear communication first,

speaking clock when you are putting a time up on when kids need to rack things up and transition to the next thing during their day. Like a warning. Like okay, we're doing it. No, a warning for me is definitely a lower tone that's based on undesirable behaviour that you want to stop. But speaking clock is in your conversational tone. It's a matter of fact and it's informational.

You're going to have dinner now. You know, we're going to have dinner now guys. Okay, I'm going to come back in 10 minutes. So wrap up what you're doing here. Okay, and then I do what you're going to go and wash your hands and get yourself ready to come to the table because I'm serving up dinner. So it's more informational. It's using your conversational tone.

Letting them know that in 10 minutes there will be a wrap-up, it will be off time next one, you know. But parents have got themselves into that place of yelling and that's only when the child responds and does as they're told. So you have to recognize the behaviour patterns of yourself and you have to recourse your own behaviour to change your children's behaviour. And that's what I observe when I go into a home. I look at the behaviour patterns that have been instilled, that have been practiced, that are a ritual now, that are negative to the well-being of the family, being in a better space, and how it's impacted each child and family member, and then I reverse an untangle, untangle and untangle. Vitamin water just dropped a new zero sugar flavor called with love.

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or counting your breaths on the subway. Peloton is for all of us, wherever we are, whenever we need it, download the free Peloton app today. Peloton app available through free tier or paid subscription starting at 12.99 per month. Is it possible that once the damage is done like that, where the kid, it's like the response reward, whatever it is, how easy or hard is it to change that pattern,

especially for an adult, right? Because you're so used to it. It's probably harder for the adult than it is for the child. Definitely for a teenager, it can be just as hard. For a young child, they know no different. So it's as easy as you're willing to be committed. So the more you're conscious of it and aware of it and the more you do it and they go, Pat, reset the bathroom. Pat yourself, yeah. Pat yourself being

aware and they go, oh no, no, no, and then again, the quicker you can get into that space of doing that, the quicker the result for you. And that all depends again on the type of person. So I'm sure there's so many similarities here because I'm sure you see it with what you know it's going to take when you're consulting and you're driving, you know, certain clients of yours to be in a better space and at on a health level. What type of personality are you dealing with? Have you met somebody who's quite feisty and compassionate? Are they quite permissive? And do you feel like they're just throwing with the wind and give up? Are they passive aggressive? So what type of temperament do you need to kind of give me a little bit of tough laugh and go right, come on.

And then afterwards, a big cuddle afterwards, like you have to gauge the type of parent that you're working with and recognise the minis for follow with children, right? Because those temperaments, DNA is real, you know, and you can see it not just in children's temperaments and in the DNA, but also in their response and reactions to the pattern of behavior that has become habitual for many families. So you do notice that usually the kids or minimies do resemble or take on the personalities of the parents most of the time. The behavior.

The behavior. The behavior. The behavior patterns. They have their own personalities and when they're given an opportunity to shine and show you their personality, it's a lot of fun and it can create a lot of humour in circumstances that can be very heated and with a lot of friction. But the temperaments of children and the way that they react, sometimes you can see many me's, you can see that mirror reflection, and mums will say to me, Oh my God, I feel like I'm team with a mini me. Yeah, you are. Yeah, exactly. You are. Yeah.

So then let's go back to that. So you said that you give them that the clock and you say, okay, 10 minutes and that very matter, it kind of like, you know, casual kind of everyday type of tone. And then what happens in a 10 minute mark when the kids are still playing? What's the next, when you do then? What's the next step? So you would then go in and based on a younger age, you would go in and you have to recognize that you're already in a space that's a downward spiral, right? So for a younger

child, you would then ask for them to the table. Okay, now here's the balance for an older child. It takes you to be able to say, look, here's where we're at. I've asked you to do this, you're completely ignoring me, you know what you need to do and then you would go in with a warning of, if I don't see any cooperation from you right now, then here's what we'll forfeit for it because there is no way we will have enough time to do X, Y and Z. If you're not going to listen and go here to what we're doing together as a family, however, we never lead with warning or consequence ever. So there has to be and so many parents make this mistake of applying the application of a consequence, a discipline for unwarranted behavior based on trying to control the child, rather than uplifting the child and giving them the guidance that

encourages them and praises them for coming to the table and for listening and for doing very well and for prompting and praising unprompted behavior as well as prompted behavior. So parents go to the place of negativity. Well, when can I start the notice step because my child's not listening to me. Now let's not worry about going to a place of controlling a child through what they're going to lose and what the full fits can be. Let's praise them and encourage them for how cooperative they have been and the skillset that they have learned and how kind it was for them to have shared

their toys today. So there has to be the Yin Yang. You cannot go in with the I want to take, take away, take away, put them on the naughty step, lose privilege of this because otherwise, what you create with children is what I call life a mentality. You're in for life. So what you've got to lose? What you've got to lose. If you take everything away from somebody, what have they got to lose? What is there to gain? So first and foremost, you have to be a parent

that I would say certainly is open and willing to learn much, to read, to learn, to observe. And the pandemic has given us this wonderful opportunity, not just to do every day, get some schoolwork done, have some fun with the kids, play some games, go outside, get some fresh air, sit down, watch a movie together, have a conversation that you haven't had, knew you needed to have with your partner, but it's given us an opportunity to observe. It's given us an opportunity to sit back in my mobile at home, where should just watch our kids, and to watch what they're saying as well as what they're not saying, how they interact with one another, what tell tell signs

do you see, so that we really can build our intuition as parents and listen to that innate voice because that's where the real confidence comes from. When we can sit back and observe and a lot of my my early years in in child care comes from not just doing and being in the field of experiencing with hundreds of families and different types of children all around the world of different status, but to actually observe, to watch behavior, to study the behavior, because we all have a pattern and some of us are creature comforts, you know, and some of us are like the old furry slippers and that little comfortable jacket, you know, even if it's no good for us. And others, you know, open to fly

with the wind, right? So children, we get a moment to sit back, which is good for us as well, to give ourselves five, I always say, you will repetitively hear me say you can't dock out hey kids I'll be back in 30 minutes just by the Starbucks gonna grab a coffee in a panini and I'll see you later you know it doesn't happen for us but to be able to give yourself permission and say it's okay if I the kids are playing I actually take 15 minutes, I'm going to put the kettle on, I'm going to make a cup of tea, I'm going to have a coffee, I'm going to look through an article I haven't read or a subscription thing that I wanted to see, and what you do is you look, and you look up, and you watch, and you learn so much from watching, you learn so much about behavior and how two people interact with one

another and that's something I've always done because I look at human behavior. I analyze it, I profile it, I study how people behave, you know, it's I guess the sociologist in me, you know, that just watches how children respond or react and how they try and make friends and, you know, what happens if you take something away from them, based the education that you know with respects to child development. So it's quite an interesting time because we can become closer and more in tune and connected to our children very natively if we spend more time just to observe. There is time in the day to do that. For those single moms that are working from home,

they're balanced between looking at a structured routine that will meet the primary cornerstones of their child's life, school in, meal time, some play time, going out, getting to bed on time, along with doing the work that they can realistically do, and in an environment and culture that we hope is supporting them, because everybody is requiring now to not expect things to be met like they were

before this pandemic. We have to have a little bit more grace and understanding for those families that are at home and the time the deadlines being met and the communication of when we can have those meetings and tag team and to do the best that we possibly can. It is not the same as what it was before the pandemic. We are having new challenges,

new rituals, we are in a new way, and in the way that we raise our family as work-emperors or not in this pandemic time. And I think that's important for many families to be able to remember. that's important for many families to be able to remember. Again, this is uncharted waters for myself, but what I am teaching is not the parenting experts in a pandemic, because I've never been for a pandemic, like everybody else. Yeah, in fact, what I am teaching is my expertise in how Exactly. You know, what I am teaching is my expertise and how what this truly has done is created some new circumstances, which is doing the best we can with homeschooling, working from home when we may have been used to going to an office, being around our partners, or we may not have been used to being friends with the whole other podcast altogether.

Right. Do another two hours on that one. Exactly. Creating boundaries where we can have space and privacy. But what it is also doing is allowing us to have a moment to regulate and to shift and to create new beginnings in a way that I do hope will be more purposeful and meaningful for each individual family because it has to have been a wake up to all of us as we were put seven weeks ago in this vital flight situation of not knowing

you know how rapidly this virus was traveling across the world. And we've all seen the numbers, you know, of those who have tragically lost. And this again brings us to a space of value in nothing that's voluntary. Everything that's valuable to us, as family, as loved ones around us, our neighborhoods, our community, and the empathy, you know, and the compassion and the loving how we will move forward and help one another as much as we can, you know. It requires us, the world is requiring us to look at collectively how we work together and not individualism. Me, myself and I, this is we. This really is collectively we. We as a world, we as a country, we as a community, we as a state, we as a

neighbor, you know, we as family and our, you know, and our neighbors too. And it wasn't, you know, it wasn't that place, you know, Oh, it's a totally different time. I feel though certain things do stand a test of time. I mean, especially with parenting and with kids, certain things, doesn't matter what's happening now only exacerbates a lot of issues, right? Like an iPad, right? Like every kid is addicted to every child I know is

addicted to these tech technology and other forced with being on zooms and other you know to learn. How do you do? So here's the difference there. So before the pandemic they were there as luxury. You know if you could an iPad, if you could have fought an iPad, a couple of iPads, how many televisions people have in their homes here is always amazing. It's amazing, isn't it? Five, seven televisions in each room, two in the concert.

There's always amazing how many televisions there's people have got going on and radio and their iPads, technology. It's so like technology. So much technology. And they were thrown in as the crutch, the electronic babysitter. They're already shows out already on season 8 of Supernanny's showing and highlighting how iPads were used as electronic baby sisters to occupy the children because ultimately what the grassroots issue was was a parent or parents that were

overwhelmed with not having a routine that supported their well-being as they were raising their different ages of children, right? And so being the crutch, now we need it as a tool. We need it as a tool for socialization, for our teams and our young ones for learning, for learning, for education, and which will always remain for its entertainment purposes. And now we really have to take a look at how we use it so that it alctions for it being the tool that it is and not for the void that

it was filling. So it being there for its true purpose, its true purpose. But there's addiction. I mean the kids are addicted to these things. How do you break that addiction? Exactly. They were before. That's what I'm saying. Something's this transcend time. It doesn't matter about COVID-19 or BC before it, the after it, kids are addicted to it.

And a big question a lot of people ask me to ask you, or I ask you is, how do you mean a child off of an iPad? Because what happens is for as active as my kids even are, when it comes down to it, the more they watch, have screen time, the more they want it, right? It's a really bad addiction. How do you break that addiction? By being accountable, period, as a parent,

understanding the importance of how you use the tool of the iPad so that it serves your kids to connect with their friends, it serves as part of their education for school, and it serves with a regulated amount of time, period for video games that are age-appropriate, and let me tell you something, there are many parents right now that are sitting there going, that's me because there's younger children playing games right now that are far too old for them and then wondering why their kids are not sleeping and I've been nightmares and thinking they're being hunted down because they're playing stuff that's far too old for them. And it's a possibility and accountability and actually sitting

this and being realistic and only in where you've been at. How many hours does your kid play a week? And what do they play during that week? And now how do we feel that space with the real things that they need to be doing that serves them every level, mentally, emotionally and physically for their well-being, and then what time to re-regulate that. So, for me, the importance on an educational level of video games being played and the stimulation of any games before bedtime isn't I know because the body will not switch off mentally it will not switch off and physically we're all hyped up there is enough scientific data to show what that does to your

brain activity as well as your blood your you know your your pulse yeah your rhythm, your pulse, and how it tuck you up before you even go to bed, right? So for me it's a no-no, a good hour and 20 minutes before bedtime, you know? So getting into a bath time routine that is more conducive to being in a space that's going to unwind your body period. Take your phones, take the tablets out of the bedrooms or do yourself a favor. For those parents right now, but have a TV in their kids bedroom, take it out. Why does TV need to be in a kids bedroom? Put it into the bedrooms. You know? So kids, small kids have to, you've seen that, small kids have to you've seen that small kids have TVs and their bedrooms. Oh culture. Oh wow. Oh

Yes, yes, I mean that's not uncommon across the Really it's very common. So you know you look at situations like that like removes So that you can create an environment in the bedroom, let's play, or sleep. You know, so the body can wind down. The problem is, and I'm gonna say it, and people are not gonna like it. Parents find excuses. Parents don't think it's a priority,

and then parents call out and say, Joe, I need help. And I say, here's where we're at. How's it a priority? And it becomes about them. Well, I just need 20 minutes, and I just need them to go to bed, and I just need my evening.

You get your evening when you first serve as a parent by giving the correct guidance of what your children need first. And then you will be rewarded with such because you did the right thing first by your child and you gave them what they needed. You gave them the opportunity to wind down through your guidance and through your parental guidance, whether the kids push back or not, in being able to set the guidelines in the

regulation to do good for your whole family. And the problem is most parents don't want to upset their kids They don't want the pushback. They don't want the argument. They don't want the resistance So they just go I give up. It's an easy way out. It's just basically just giving in Yeah, you know, I see people always giving their iPad like you know at dinner time They don't want to deal with it. They want the kids to eat so they put an iPad or a phone in front of them Which to me I would think would be terrible right? Why? It's not just the conversation that happens around a table as a

family but it's an opportunity to teach good table manners. It's an opportunity to talk to each one of your family members and converses around the socialization of the aspects of family coming together. It's also about food regulation. We eat twice as much when we're sitting at a eating, eating, watching, eating, eating. You can't hear the natural call of my body's full up, it's just yawn twice. You know, we need to know I'm full. So, you know, there are so many there's people do it. And or listen into it, interject. A lot of people I know they put the iPad in

front of their kids because their kids don't eat. So they put the iPad or the phone or a TV or screen to make the meat. They just, you know, it means so they actually are distracted by the television. Be the verbal television. You children are very young, when families are making the transition from pure food to food, that's a little bit more lumpier, right? And parents get panic because they think their kids are going to choke. Yeah, they can eat a whole slice of dried toast

and a whole bag of goldfish. Yeah, something soft, they think they're going to choke on. They even had dry food for the whole day. Right. And every child does that. Right, but I don't do it. And every parent goes, we're gonna choke, right? So funny. They put something in front of the child to distract. And we, and we're never gonna pull the television where they off of the wall. So back in the day the kids went in front of the television and ate a little table or a high chair in the living room. Now we have mini TVs, we have phones and we have iPads. So it's now miniature enough to come to the table, right? Right, right. And they couldn't eat in front, but I say at that young age, a district or child, talk about something else,

because if the focus becomes about the food, then they'll just play on it. And look, I mean, I've seen young adults, 2022, at a top table, at a wedding, holding their phone. Yes, I know. I went to Rome with my husband and sat and with my family and husband and I sat and watched the family of six, a family of six and each one had the phone and miniature video gaming, an iPad, they all had something really wrong. How do you spend the day as a tourist, trapping around Rome and at dinner time, not talking about what you've had to try and absorb, because there's so much to absorb, at dinner time, how do you?

At dinner time, how do you? I know, it's amazing, isn't it? It's amazing. And even if, even if you're in a space of just, we need a moment, then that's fine. You know, that is what happens at the table. We have moments where we talk, and then there's a couple of minutes where everybody's just eating, and it's quiet.

And then somebody says, hey, did you see what was, oh yeah, now I remember, all my friends told me and it's quiet. And then somebody says, hey, did you see what was, oh yeah, now I remember all my friends told me it's another conversation. And then it's quiet and a little bit of eating and we teach our children very young when we want them to finish at a decent pace. We don't want a child taking an hour to eat a meal, but in a decent pace around 30, 35 minutes,

we teach them how to do that. We talk and then we'll say come on, let's eat some of our food now. You know, let's not talk anymore right now. Let's eat some of our food and then we'll talk again and then you food and at the same time We're saying keep your mouth, you know, keep your mouth closed. Don't talk with your mouth all, you know Waiting to finish what's in your mouth and then you can talk because we're teaching good manners as well. So we're leading by example hopefully at the table and by the manners that we instill so that we can teach our children a standard you know and a decent expectation of behaviour and social conduct and that's incredibly important in the primitive years and if we can do so as parents, what

we do is shape how they then behave once they get into those twin agey years. And by then, you know, we're hoping that they are a credit to us, you know, as young teenagers in the way that they're able to conduct themselves and their behaviour when they're at home and when they're out. That's not to say that we're not a little bit more informal at home, but I still think there's etiquette and standard of behaviour that should be honoured and should not be lost. It's the ching in the wheel that's been lost when it comes to parenting and it's not been taught for a couple of generations and now it's lost, you know, and that needs to come back again. Buy about. Take your Dean. Let it all out. That RRI co-op, we're here for all the outs.

We want you to spend more time outside our doors and in there. Try it out, check out, think it out. RRI co-op, all out. Visit RRI.com. What are some things that you would say in all of your 30 years that are the tips, like the three no-nose to do and the three yeses to do? This thing would be so many. I know.

Which topic, which circumstance? That's what it says, because it depends on the age, right? But like, have we age? The age and the topic and, you know, the circumstance. Look, there's a mantra that I always mean, what you say, say what you mean, but don't say it mean.

Yeah, I know, yeah. Me what you say, say what you mean, but don't say it mean. Don't say it mean. You know, and if a lot of parents have coed in understanding that, say what you mean, mean what you say, but don't say it mean. You if an old parent said, coed in understanding that, so what you mean, mean when you say, don't say it mean,

if they understood that, they probably want to have got themselves into a lot of trouble. You know, they have to un-tangle themselves out of, you know. Well, I do find that it's easier for someone, like people always say that kids don't listen to the parent

as well as they listen to like an outsider, right? Like, a lot of times you probably have more, more success than the actual parent, maybe, maybe, because the kid will listen to you more. What are the lives of all of them? Not really. When I walk into a home, there is a fresh standard, okay?

So, I mean, when I walk in, there's the standard, there's an expectation. You have an expectation, right, okay, you know when I walk in there's the standard there's an expectation right you have an expectation Obviously as somebody experienced in this field I can balance what I noticed what I Talk about and give the kids praise for so for example if one child If I'm working with one child and their parents over an issue I will never forget to make sure that the other children are thanked for their patience. And while we resolve a circumstance, I'm very mindful of every individual family member as I'm helping an entire family. So when I come in, there is a standard. Some of it is due to the fact that the older

kids have already watched the Supernanny shows. They've been on YouTube. And they know I don't mix my words, even though I give out, although I give out lots of great hands, they know, when I mean it, I mean it, right? I'm firm, but I'm fair. So there's this moment of, you know, kids getting past the fact that parents have called me the new bogey man, she's gonna come.

Nanny, Joe's gonna come here, and then you're going to find out, you know. But they know with me that there's a give and take. They know there's a compromise. They know that they get is the firm that they're, you know. And they, and kids want to show you that. They want to meet that expectation. They want to go, hey, look at me. This is the real me.

Hey, I'm a great kid. Every kid's a great kid, you know? But the behavior can sometimes be undesirable in a space where it's caused a problem, not just necessarily the child because they're a teenager and all the teenager, but because of how the parents have behaved. So it's fresh with me. You have to

remember with families though, parents have seen the playbook for a long time with parents showing up a certain way. So in a way they lose, they lose some respect and they lose the impact that they can make in a very positive way until they change their behaviour. When I can clean slate with older children like twin ages and teenagers, and I can have the parents recognise the patterns and where they've gone wrong. To clean the slate by saying, look, it's a new day. I'm taking accountability for my own behavior as well.

Nanny Jo is here to change things. I'm going to be listening to her. There are things I'm going to be learning myself. And this isn't OK anymore. And we need to change this and really work together as a family. Then what you see then is a moment of the behavior changing in the parent. A resistance from the teenager normally to say, do I trust you? Are you really going to do this tomorrow

as well? But once the parent has been given the tools, I mean, encouragement and the light bulbs switches on, which I can tell you in 30 years, never, never gets old. It's wonderful to see when it happens. And the penny drops and they're like, why did I do this before? What was I thinking? I'm like, don't beat yourself up, let's just keep going. No. But that family, the magic really does happen

because through their own changing behavior, they've been able to change their children's, their families and the impact of how they all move forward. And that percentage is incredibly high because when people call me, they really don't call me in for a cup of tea and a slice of cake. They call me in because I am the last child saloon normally. We've tried everything, we've done everything. Some have even been to therapists and psychologists. They say it hasn't worked, it hasn't worked.

Or even they'll tell me, I've tried all your techniques. Nothing worked, Joe, nothing worked. And I go, okay, let's start with the first one. Oh, oh no, no, I didn't do that. Oh, but that's the step. Oh, oh no, well, I decided to tweak it a little bit and I decided to, oh, you decided to go off track. So you sabotaged yourself.

So I'm able to backtrack with families, their own way of recognizing, follow the technique. It will never let you down, ever. You know, when I teach families is tried, tested and proven for three decades now, you know? So, and yes, every circumstance is different, as in family, they're unique, they're special,

they're different to any other family, their history is different, their family dynamic is different. The child development is child development, you know, and because of my own life experience of working with families, I've been able to see it in all different ways, not just textbook, it's not all the child walks and then the teeth come out. There's a sign, kids, they get the teeth before they walk. You know, so it's truly experience of being able to then look at a family and recognize that although they are special and very unique in themselves, they actually share universal issues and problems with many other families.

And my job is to tailor specifically the uniqueness of the family to the universal challenge that they have and simplify what seems so complicated for them. And if I can do that for them and they get the results that they get and we use the power of television to capture this moment in time of a family, then it gives hope for every other family around the world because when they're watching they can relate and say, well actually, if the Joneses can do it, you know what?

We need to do it as well because we're just, that's us, that's how I feel, that's what you told me yesterday, well that's what we're going to do, you know, and that's the beauty told me yesterday. Well, that's what we're going to do. And that's the beauty of it really. It's really beautiful. Is there an age range that you work as your sweet spot?

Not really. I mean, predominantly through the supernanny shows have done younger children, you know, like twin ages, down to babies. I started off working as a nurse looking after, I'm not a nurse, but I started off looking after newborns when they came home. I'd be a nurse. So like a baby nurse. Yeah, like a late nurse. Yeah, I did that too, I did night nurse and two. So, you know, they call it maternity nursing.

You know, you have, you look after an infant, a newborn, for the first six weeks. And then normally the family may go on to then hire a soul charge and Annie, whatever those circumstances are. When I started off looking after a lot of babies, and then I moved into the toddler years and then progressed with being headhunted for challenges for many different types of ages of children, you know,

into those teenage years. And but my own work and understanding and I guess I would say makeup of who I am gives me the opportunity to be able to very intuitively connect with adults in their relationship and to profoundly look at each individual family member and to work how I will bridge the gap in not just resolving the issues

through having the experience of doing so, but uniquely the impact that that makes to that particular family I'm working with. So predominantly you have seen me work with toddlers back in the day with different shows, but I actually work with teenagers from sleeping to eating to a lot of now, you know, a lot of, a lot of marriage counseling, a lot of young, you know, a lot of young couples who have married grandparents because they become more involved with looking after the children, teenagers and addiction, the video game in, even five-six year old showing signs and symptoms of overuse in technology.

So the gamut my spectrum is very wide in my expertise in being able to help, you know, families and you know, help them resolve many different challenges. Yeah, I know it sounds like it sounds like we were saying earlier, it's more that you're in you observe behavior and what your forte is is tweaking the behavior. Not necessarily even just in the children, but it's much more about the adults or the combination, the dialogue dynamic between both, really. I would say, I just, you know, it's three decades of observation and in the trenches, the practical experience of helping so many different families in unique circumstances and challenges.

But the makeup of who I am and the work that I do and how I connect with children is something to me that's been, is very natural for sure, very very natural and to be able to connect with those parents in their relationships with each different family members, sometimes I'm helping families who've been estranged or parental alienation or how to help families co-parent under different strengths, circumstances, but indeed families now, families who are what they call the sandwich generation, the burnt out of the women in their 50s looking after younger children and elderly parents as well. And it's not, I don't put it into a box, like it's just mothers, it know, it's just fathers. You know, it's parents.

Parents. I was just taken form that turn, you know, that happens to be. It doesn't, you know, I work with the, you know, with the gay community, you know, and the importance of recognizing, as a whole, in breeding awareness that your sexuality does not define you as a parent,

you know, but who you are as a parent and what you learn and how I can educate you to help your families, what's most important in you feeling great on the journey that you have, you know. Do you take private clients now? Is it mostly just this? Yes. Maybe show any books and stuff?

I always have done. So you see me on camera helping families in the different formats that I've done throughout the years, beyond supernanny, but also off camera. You know, I do private consultation for many families around the world. That's done telephone or via Skype for those consultations. Right now, what I'm doing is providing public service for a lot of families.

I have a point to be able to, you know, in a very concise way if I can reach out and answer questions to those on Twitter or to those that come by JoFrost.com to the website that write me an email and say, I really need help here. And then some will come for and say, you know, that they may have wanted a challenge resolved, that they're going through a transition. And some even book me, which is rather delightful, sometimes they've put me for baby showers, you know? Really? That's great. Yeah, or sometimes families like mums will get together

and want to do like a Zoom, you know, like 10 mums get together and say, right, let's talk to Joe, you know, let's pick a brain on some stuff that we're all going through and be able to have what we're doing here really, but with more. Would you ever move into someone's house for a month? Like in real life, if some family, some like, I don't know, super rich family,

we're like, you know what, I really wanna use this lady for a month to really put my family in order. Would you do it? It would probably be a very hard shot to try and get me for a month with the workload that I do have happening. Probably back in the day it would have been easier to do. It wouldn't be that easy to grab me for a month now and be able to do that. But regardless

of ritual and orality or of fame, many celebrity families reach out to me for help because they're just like mom and dad's, and most families are able to be able to work with me via Skype to be able to help them. You'd be surprised the amount of families that inkind me to be there. Well that's your end thing. A lot of people are like, oh my God,

like I want this lady to live with me for a month, right? I have traveled, I have traveled to London, I've traveled to Italy, I've traveled to families who want me to come over and do a consultation and to spend a weekend to be able to, but most importantly, regardless of your financial circumstance, to me is about the integrity of the work. It's like, first and foremost, do you really need me there? You may think you need me there, but let's talk first. Let's have a consultation. Let's work out where your challenges are right now, first and foremost, and let's see what

we can do. A much can be accomplished through consultation and through the practice of being able to have those weeks of consultation and to practice the work that I'm giving you to actually do in the techniques. Right. I'm sure. Because I'm just saying your time is probably extremely valuable. You're very busy with the show and with everything else. Yes, that's what there is going to be like, re-Atlant realistically. If someone wants you to live with them, it's going to cost, you know, a pretty penny. That's why I was going to say.

Yeah, a month would never, you know, you don't need, you know, you wouldn't need me to move into it. I think that some parents are like so at their withs end. I've been asked, I just think they'll mortgage their home for you. Never mind, and that's what I'm saying. Richard not rich, people would mortgage their home and put a third mortgage on the home. I've been asked, I just recently finished, you know, before the pandemic happened, I was helping a wonderful family.

They're like, can you move in? I'm like, can you move in? I'm going to give you a cue. There's so many people asking, can you move in? Exactly. Can I? I'm curious. What is the most asked question that you get?

What is the most popular thing that people seem to ask you? What do they, On a parenting level, you know, it's the, you know, it's the behavior, it's the sleep, it's the travel or sharing. On a personal level, what would they ask me personally? I don't know if there's any one particular. When I first came, when I first came to America, people doused me if I was an actress. Really? If people asked me if I was an actress when I first came over and I was always like an actress, how are you going to act this? Are you kidding me? No, for intellects, but I help families.

I'm curious how it's like, because you don't you know, for intellect, but I help families, you know, I'm curious how it's like, because you don't have kids, right? No, no, you don't have kids. It's amazing. So how did you become such a global phenomenon in the space of parenting, right? Like what is your nurse, the maternal nurse? How did you become so good? Like, is it just innate?

And you just kind of like get it on a deep level more so than the average? I mean, what is, how do you get it? I mean, I do get it on a level that most wouldn't, that there's no two ways about that. And my experience, you know, 30 years of experience gives you a lot of opportunity to be able to listen, to be able to help, to be able to, you know, pay way and being able to help families break the mold, create

better habits, rituals, understand bridge the gap between, you know, parent and child. And like I said to you before, the makeup of who I am anyway, you know, that allows me to connect with people the way that I do, but I started off as a professional nanny, you know, helping, like I told you, they call that name maternity nurse, but it wasn't for me, because I'm not a nurse, but I started off looking after babies. And you know, that's six weeks, that kind of first six weeks, love when newborns come home. And I was a professional dedicated nanny. And in doing so, it gave me the opportunity to work

with different families. And from there, I was headhunted to resolve certain circumstances and that led to phone calls. My father used to joke because back then we had house lines and he used to joke. It's the nanny hotline, it's going again, you know, because families obviously would ask for help. And I've always loved children, As a child, I love children. I mean, I've always loved children. I love the work that I do. For me, it's very vocational, the work that I do.

It's a passion that is a tank that never empty. My mind is thinking about the ways that I can help and making sure that I'm able to facilitate what the families need. And in order to do that, you need to listen very well, you know, to what they're asking for. And from there, I had an opportunity, obviously, to do the Supernanny show and to pass with that,

to pass on that wisdom, really, and that expertise. And, you know, at that moment I recognised that there was an opportunity for me to really help many families on a level that was phenomenal, and that's the power of television when you can use it in a way that really has a positive impact. And so the Supernanny was incredibly successful. I had no idea, but when it went out, it was incredibly successful for Channel 4. Absolutely. I had no idea, and then I had the opportunity to come to America. And from then, I was received. I've had, I'm so grateful because families are so grateful and I get the most beautiful

messages and responses from families. There's so much love. Sometimes you can come out of a house early hours in the morning and you're really tired and you've been on the road. And somebody would have left a little note for you, you know, heard where you were and left a little note. And it's just, you know, it's so warm in, you know. And I'm very lucky I've been here since 2004 in America. I go back and forth, you know, I did that going back and forth with England to do the show and, you know, to travel elsewhere around the world, to do seminars, keynote speaking, the opportunity to write books, which was amazing. It's been so, so many amazing opportunities for me to be able to help families.

But I have to say most of all, is the love that I've received. It's very touching for me, very humbling, it really is. When you download the Kroger app, you have easy access to savings every day. Shop weekly sales and get personalized coupons to get the most value out of every trip every time, whether you shop in-store or online. Download the Kroger app now to save big. Kroger, fresh for everyone, must have a digital account to redeem offers. Restrictions may apply, see site for details.

Save big on your favorites with the buy, five or more, save a dollar each sale. Simply buy five or more participating items and save a dollar each with your card. Kruger, fresh for everyone. You've helped so many families. I mean, I remember your show from years ago, because even if your family's not like the family

that you're on, that you're watching, you can actually learn something from a technique or from something that you're showing, that you otherwise would never have known. And people love that ability, right? Like anybody who has children or in a space like that, you need to look upon people who are, you know, who are experts, who you can learn upon people who are experts, who you can learn from, who are better than you, and use their toolbox if things are not working, right? So, I mean, just conversations that I had,

the reality of those conversations, even if you don't have children, and you just love to watch the show, there's something that you can learn because, it may be about the relationship between the dynamic goals, or the dynamic between the other family members you know and that's the beauty. It's being given the opportunity to actually use your experience and expertise to be able to help others. That for me is, that

for me is the best thing you know that I'm able to do every day for so many families. And hope that what they are learning and what they are relating to and what they are inspired by watching those families who are so brave to ask for my help and to have two camera and two soundman, you know, with me in their homes, and that they are not only just empowered themselves, but the bigger picture of what's being done here, the bigger picture of that is that that family in helping themselves just helped me as a family. Without even knowing it, you know, how powerful in such a positive way is that, like to me that's just, you know, just talking about it now, just having a moment of being present

here, like that's so, so powerful, so powerful to be able to as a family through your own hardship and emotional journey, you know, happy opportunity to also help another family whilst you're receiving the help yourself in being in a better space. So, you know, a big thank you to all of those families on all my different shows, you know, whether it's been Nanny on tours, Super Nanny, Extreme rental, God's, whatever the show is, family, I say, you know, it's been been several like done and produced, you know, the opportunity to be able to do

that it truly is, it's beautiful, really, it's really beautiful. Are you having to, when you do these shows, how long are you living with the family that you're helping? Like how long is that whole, like how long is that take? Well, it all depends what the format is. You know, the new one. The new one right now is, I believe we're around for 10 days.

You're 10 days, but you don't live with that. Because people were in the next. If I have to be on this sofa, if I have to, you know, keep out on this sofa, because there's, you've been issues than I will, but no, I don't have to. Are you done? It depends what the circumstances are. And then can I ask you one question and I'll let you go because you've been so gracious

with your time sharing. How do you get siblings to share with each other? You mentioned it a little bit and then we kind of got off that a bit. How do you do that? What's a good technique to use? So it's the practice of being able to do it, so it's timed sharing. So again, we're in a moment where we don't have little ones around to play right now, so the sharing would come from the siblings. If they're the same age, I think it's important to recognise that we quite easily buy two of everything.

So I'd really encourage a parent to just do one of something, one box with the crayons and they all have to share and learn to put them back. But really we teach better sharing when we're involved with our children and we're actually playing with them because then they can take turns and understand this might turn its your turn and recognising that through the joy of sharing which sometimes I do it technique where I ask each child to take something that's special of them in their bedroom and to give it to the other sibling to look after to show that there is a respect for looking after each other's belongings as well.

So it comes in a whole package of having respect for your own belongings first, taking care of other people's belongings, and then the joy that comes from sharing and playing together. But it's within the practice of actually coming together with the children and teaching them first. Taking turns, learning the rules of the games, looking at the opportunities where you bring your children together to have fun together and using one of rather than then all having one because a lot of parents have one each. Oh, I didn't want them to fight, so I brought them one each.

Oh, really? A lot of toddlers families who Have twins or triplets They ebath have one of each Or they have one and so the kids learn pretty quickly Right and and then the story becomes making sure that the dominant twin or triplet is not the one who's the loudest getting everything for the time.

Well, that happens in my house anyway, right? The more dominant alpha that always wins, the older one, my step in your old. So you have to be mindful of that, because again, that kind of behavior only then teaches that this behavior gets them what they want. Exactly. So again, if you can have one of something and teach them the importance of being able to, you know, recognize those rules and to recognize it again, your children's own behavior, then on purpose, you give to the other child first.

So it is quite interesting to observe yourself for a moment and be very present and go, well, how did I respond? You know, like I can sometimes help families with twins and triplets and they stick the one that's the loudest right next to them and feed them first. And I would change the dynamic and say no put yourself between them both and put the loudest fervor away because you did that to meet the needs of feeding and keeping them quiet right and now the one who's quiet has learned to be even more quiet because they feel invisible so again you take a relatable universal issue and

then you uniquely tailor that to the dynamic of what the family is. Is it twins? It becomes very different to if it's like a nine-year-old and say a five-year-old because again sometimes a five-year-old wants to play with the nine-year-old things. And the nine-year-old just wants to play with a Lego set on their own. And he thinks to do with the younger child right now. And then other times, you can blow up a few balloons and punch them around in the guards, and everyone wants to play. Right, right, right. But you just play a very good point. You learn the squeaky, the squeaky wheel gets the oil in life, right? And it's true.

The kid who is the more loud kid, the more dominant kid, always seems to, so you give it to the opposite kid and teach that lesson. Yeah, I like that. Well, you've been amazing. Thank you so much for coming on this podcast. I've learned a tremendous amount. You've been great. Now, where do people find you to get more information?

We have general parent information, good for all, on jowfrost.com. There's information always going on there. Then the Twitter is Joe underscore Frost, which I reach out. And sometimes I'm like, hey, I'm on, put your questions through. And then on jofrost.com as well, you can go to where it says contact Joe. You can reach out by email.

Oh, OK. My Instagram is Joe Frost. Easy enough. All right, so Joe Frost, Frost, Joe Fawke, okay perfect. Well, thank you so much. You've been amazing and You know unfortunately they get a chance to meet you face to face but I guess this is the best. This is the next thing, right? Much success to you and the And the eighth season of Super nanny and hopefully you get to film, start filming it again soon. Yeah, we're going to have to work out how we do that safely with the phases of California

right now. I know. But there's a wheel, there's a way. Absolutely. Well, you're the best. Stay safe and thank you so much. I appreciate it. Thank you for the opportunity. I appreciate it.

Absolutely. Bye. Bye-bye. And every stoon in you can get to know. We inspired, this is your moment. Excuses, we in heaven at the habits and hustle podcasts. Power by happiness. At Carvana, we're in the business of driving you happy. And with the widest selection of used cars under $20,000, you're bound to find a car that'll put a smile on your face. Carvana gives you control by letting you customize your down and monthly payments. You can browse tens of thousands of cars online to find one within your budget, and you won't

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