Hello From The Magic Tavern - 14 - Music of Foon

Episode Date: June 3, 2015

Two traveling bards are passing through Hogsface and I am going to try to convince them to be on the podcast and play some music.CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungGlenn Miller: Nick GageSpants: Meridith StepienMysterious Man: Tim SniffenKern: Spencer HamProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgiEditor: Ryan DiGiorgiTheme Music: Andy PolandYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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are, and you stay on top of everything all the time. Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of fune. I'm your host Arnie Neacamp. If you haven't listened to the podcast before, I'll quickly explain what's going on. A while back, I fell through a dimensional schism behind a Burger King into a magical land of fun. And I'm still getting a slight Wi-Fi signal

from the Burger King, I think, through the dimensional rift. And I'm using that to host a weekly podcast here in the tavern, the Vermilion Minotaur, in the Downahogs face, in the land of Phun. And sharing with the people of Earth the magical things I'm learning about this weird land. I'm hesitant to say weird because I think it upsets my co-hosts. I want you guys to go ahead and introduce yourselves. I am Yusudor, Wizard of the Twelfth Realm of Ephesius, Master of Light and Shadow, Manipulator of Magical Delights,

DIVOR of Chaos, Champion of the Great Holes of Tarakas, the elves Nobius Fyingyork, the doors Nobius Zonen who extinguishes, and I'm known in the North East. And I'm known in the North East as Gassamuiness Mastar, and I may be of a secret nature to not know yet. Pfft. Yes, I know you think it's weird here. It is, it's a little weird, I'm sorry. I think I maybe use the word weird too much. You know, I have to admit that perhaps things are a little bit weird this week now that, uh, friend Chunt.

I know, top story, Chunt! Hey guys, Chunt here. Chunt has changed. I'm now a tiny horse. I know. A tiny horse with two blood holes. Oh, God. So now, I mean... a tiny horse. I know. A tiny horse with two blood holes. Oh, God. So now I mean.

Oh, welcome. Yes, thank you for making that, for making that tiny horse. I mean, I don't like to kiss and tell, but let's just say. It's pretty obvious. Let's just say. Let's just say what happened. Let's just say I fucked that tiny horse in his two battles. No.

Yes, let's just say that. Yeah, I feel like I don't like to do that. There's no need to go into further detail. I don't like to do that. I don't need to go into further detail I don't like to do well too much on the reality of chun's powers, but chunt is a skin changer Or if you have sex with an animal you turn into the skin changer. I'm a sheep shifter a shape shifter I'm sorry. I just change a skin. That sounds gross. I agree sounds like open mic. That's true So you but I've always known you as a badger and now you're a tiny horse. Yeah, so do you believe me now? I do. I actually honestly 100% thought that you were just a talking badger who was lying about all the shape shifting stuff.

Well, I got a little drunk after boys' nights and got kind of lonely so as I was going back to my din, I had that little horse with me and you know, he's being kind of flirtatious One thing led to another and I fucked the tiny horse in his two buttles. Oh Now but this was also a discrete horse like this was like a a short-term horse So he by by morning he was disappeared. He was gone. He evaporated because it was a magical turn back into the The souls of the murdered at that point The what the souls of the murdered at that point. What, uh, the what? The souls of the murdered? The souls of the murder?

Yes, as I've mentioned before, my powers are largely based in the forces of light and darkness, and I use the very stuff of shadows to create my magical delights, and sometimes that means you have to use, you know, the souls of murders they're floating around. Oh, God. Oh, those who have been murdered, I'm sorry, not the souls of murders. The souls of murders, they are brought into the control of the dark Lord and he does use their souls to create foul demons and creatures more hideous than you can imagine. So what you do, a similar tactic to the dark Lord is what you're saying. So you're not that different than the Dark Lord?

I'm very different than the Dark Lord. I'm using all my powers and all my influence here in the land of Fung to overcome his evil ways. And yes, I may have to tap into the bits of shadow and the bits of light to create a tiny horse from the soul of the people who have been murdered in here in food, here in hogs face, but that does not make me evil. Okay, now that I have two but holes,

I don't know if I can go back. Go back, that is just one. It is nice, right? All right, I can go back to one. So for people who haven't listened recently, we found out wizards have two buttholes. So you used to do it, you have two buttholes. Yes.

And now, Chant, you have as a tiny horse with two buttholes. Yeah. I don't think I really want to know, but I'm going to ask anyone. It just takes a lot of pressure off your, if you have one butthole, there's a lot of pressure on that one butthole. You know what I'm saying?

I mean, it's just a lot of pressure on that one. So to have two is kind of like equally distributes your business to where you just, it just feels like, I've been constipated. It's like luxurious. Yeah, I don't wanna, let's not, I don't wanna go further down this path. Can I also quickly say just, just because,

I don't know if I've let you know, depending on how much I have affection or love for who I sleep with, will affect the amount of time it takes for me to change. So this was just like a hookup. So within a few hours, I was a tiny horse. Wow, okay. But if it's love, if it's something real,

then it usually takes a fortnight. I see. Interesting. Sounds like retconning to me, but it's very interesting. But you know what, is that? That's all right, it's our stuff. I don't want to talk about our stuff. You know what? I want to really quickly, before I introduce our guests, if you want to email us to have asked questions about what's going on in FUNE, you can email us at magic tavern at puppies.supplies. I know it doesn't sound like a real email address, but it is. And I want to read an email we recently got from De Zero email? My wife unfortunately has not emailed me. I can't have anyone on.

I'm sure she, I, you can also contact me by poking your finger with the rows of a thorn and dripping blood into a still pond. Have you gotten any messages that way? No, no. All right, good. So a quick email from Violet. Hi, Ernie, I was so excited to hear your podcast. To think there is a magical world so close to ours and full of so many wonderful things. I've heard that singing songs is common when going on quests. How does music play a role in fun?

That's a great question. I'm so excited that our guests this week are some traveling barbs. Hello. Hello. Hello. And so, what are your names? I'm Glenn Miller. Glenn Miller. That's right. My name is Spance. Spance. And so you are traveling Bards. You travel around food, singing songs, for money? That's correct, you know. Something of a musical duo. Well, play pretty much anywhere. I don't take us. I, whether it's here within a tavern or... Sure, out in the woods. Out in the woods. So sometimes you just like go out in the woods and play and hope that people gather?

Yeah, and they do. The animals of sorts. I mean, we're usually beckoned. Beckoned. If that's what you're asking. Beckoned like men. Summoned beckoned people. By the fairy folk of the wood.

Oh! I once once a year they put on a great funapalooza. Yes, in the middle of the woods, a great many day long concert, wonderful things, and then a changing child is stolen away. What? Yes, they end up every Funa Paloza. One child is stolen and taken into the fairy world, the fairy world.

There are so many things in Funa that start off sounding like fun, and then they have really dark endings. I don't know what you mean. Okay. So you guys, you play all over FUN. Sure. Is it a hard life being traveling, validiers or is it? Yeah, I mean it was easier for a time. I had set up shop in Hawaii where my family is from.

I was getting ready to retire there but some circumstances changed and I had to go out on a quest of sorts. I love it there. Are we talking about Hawaii before? No, Hawaii? Yes, Hawaii. Tell me a little bit about Hawaii. That's a chain of islands and the big bull. Interesting. So it's hard to say, can you say it? Hawaii? Yeah, interesting. Yeah. But it's a tropical paradise of sorts, and I was doing well there, and the Dark Lord's presence became quite pronounced there. I've not actually seen him, but one day I was out tilling, and I saw a flaming bird a bird of fire wow fly through the sky

Which is the mark of the dark or sure and he's that is the door is that the mark of the dark Lord? Yes, of course it is you think birds just catch on fire. I mean, I don't know. I don't know I'm like how many birds have you seen flying around on fire? I go everything's fine. I'm happy as could be It's possible right no. Do you want to be on fire? No, not at all. So you saw a flaming bird. It's right, he flew into my house, set my hot on fire. And, oh, I'm so sorry.

My kitty was alone in the home, and, uh, he, uh, my kitty was torched. Oh, and kitty as in your cat? Or your, okay, what? I thought he meant his child Kitty kid I wasn't sure no my Why would all this child a kitty my cat? Kitchie cat cat was torched We've just had a lot of child death on the show recently, but still very tragic when it when a pet is torched

Well, it was not torched to the death. It was still illuminated and flame It pranced out of the house on fire for which it shall remain ever more ever more on fire. He should be a flaming beast for holy cow Is that the sign of the dark Lord of death? K with it many Evil portents for the flaming bird, coming contact with a flaming cat, and that flaming cat is enthused by a dog and the dog of catch on fire, and then an elephant finds that dog and they're all flamin' running through the forest.

So it's like a weird burning animal pyramid scheme that the Dark Lord has got going on? Exactly. Oh wow. Hawaii is just a run-of-mock with flaming dogs and cats. Oh, yeah, so I feel like that would be a good reason to get out of there. That's why I had to leave. Yeah. And Span's, what about you? What's your story?

Well, I'm born and raised here in Fune. My father played Bar mitzvah's when I was small. Bar mitzvah's. Yes. It's a large Jewish people. Yeah, that's right. They're just telling you about Jewish people. That's right.

Yes, we have Jewish people in my world as well. Oh, really? Yeah, we do. Are they magical? Yeah, I guess so. I don't know, probably. Most likely they are. I would assume only.

So that's when I first learned to play music. My father taught me all the great fun songs. So do you know seven dragons in a baby? Oh yes of course. Oh I love that. That's a good one. Yes of course and where when I first met Glenn he was unaware of any of funes traditional music so of course we joined forces and I taught him what I knew and he taught me what he knew and now Well quite popular I must say Got a nice little blend of funis and a

Troll rock. Oh wow troll rocks. So are you a part troll? About half troll half troll. Oh, wow Cool, can you do you mind if I ask if you guys would play a song for us? Not at all. Of course. Oh, sure. You know, an introductory song. What should I do during this? You should be quiet. Traveling bars of food won't keep you very long. Just give us all your coins We're singing rob our loins the magical traveling parts of food have that so smooth and strong Wow, that was great fantastic. Thank you very much. I do I don't know if this really happens a lot with songs I have some follow-up questions. Yeah, I don't know people I don't know people asking questions about your songs

Just I know you're not in favor of that. Just a question, everything. I know, well, that's kind of the whole point of this podcast. So you guys are the magical birds of fun. Like, do you have magical properties or is that more just kind of hyperbole in the song? Oh, well, we have perfect pitch. Oh.

Ooh. So, yes, that was an A sharp sea. Oh, wait, wait right here. I'll be right back. And also our fingers glow. Oh wow. It's impressive. You're more impressed with that than perfect pitch. Do you know how hard it is to have perfect pitch?

I mean, I'm sure it's hard. What do you do? What do I do? Yeah, what magical powers do you have? I can consume an entire Snickers. Yeah, I believe it. Fricky fast. What's it?

Yeah, I just ran up stairs. Yeah, take this rock. No, you and your rocks. Oh, really? I believe that if you have the power of perfect pitch and you hold this rock, you may sing so loud that you can shatter stone itself. Oh, do you mind if I try again?

Well, I rather you didn't do it in here. He's a little... Yeah, he's constantly giving people rocks that he says have magical rocks. It's not, it's not. I actually have another question. Would you guys mind actually playing your song one more time? Oh, no, no, no. No problem.

Now we hear the traveling birds of fun solists into a song. No problem. That's part I kinda was not- Now I specifically asked beforehand because I didn't want to ruin the song. I said what should I do during the song? You said be quiet. Then you had to play the song again and you spoke right into the middle of it. Yeah I know I'm sorry. I was- How dare you sir. I- you know I was just the- the- The rubbing your loins part.

Is there- I guess I'm not really sure- You don't- you don't understand it? Have you never been to it? Oh you don't understand loins? I guess I don't understand. Chan.'t understand it. Have you never been to it? Oh, you don't understand ruins? I guess I don't understand. Chant, calm your butt hole, Stan, a little bit. It's just like if someone says I'm cold, Arnie has to immediately go, let's talk about this. You say you're cold? Are you cold?

Yeah, I just said I'm fucking cold. Look, I just don't try not to hear you. Here's the top hat. Bing! Oh, wow! I'll be right back Are you into a tiny horse not getting along right now? Oh, that's that's chun. Yeah, that's that's chun He's not just a tiny horse. He's a sheepshifter. I couldn't help but notice he got a double butt. He does What how does how does I work? Both function simultaneously you guys want to hear two parts one after another Here we go here we go. Here I need sounds are any donut erupts ready?

And That first thought was a C sharp C the second was a B minor It's pretty cool Okay, I don't want to talk too much in this song, but is this like a music slash sex show? I guess I'm just trying to get a sense of if it's just no people can pay a little extra and we we will make love to them but no wow never to each other. No, no, okay I see because you want to it's you professionals your relationship is decidedly non-sexual. I see I'm only asking for the sake of the show But how much does that cost? The three or four extra coins or do the trick? I'll be right back

For book it's a meat Do you mind? Okay, so now I kind of get the lay of the land Would you mind if we hear another song? I just I'm just excited to learn some more about the music of food sure Yeah, well, I guess carrying off of them where I'd left off When's I saw my kitty my flamen, my flamen kid, running out of my flamen hut. I did the only thing I knew to do. And I reached for my oak and I began strumming.

And the words really start to threaten themselves. What can I walk on? My pussy song! It's okay, it's okay. Sorry. He needs it. Maybe we should play another song. It's still a little... Tender?

Yeah. Is it burned to talk about? I ran outside and I smashed her pots and I found this human heart. I don't know you. I mean, you said, or I'm gonna suggest that you maybe don't have sex with the band because they're pussy's on fire. They're an emotionally vulnerable place right now because they're pussy's on fire. Why do you have that?

Look at that smirk again. So please, I don't know. You know why the people of Earth are just gonna be loving it. But I can't really explain our stuff to you guys. Yeah. Uh, would you like to hear a traditional lullaby from food? I would, I absolutely would. One, but I'm sure you're tiny horse

and you're a wizard no also, but we were seeing it for you. Yeah, I'm a new father, so I would absolutely love to hear a little. Oh, you thought this will put your child right to sleep. Has magical powers. Wow. to be here to creep, but when they come back from their trip, they're once to take your soul. You're safe till they return, my love, then they're out of our control. Oh, my night.

Wow. My dad used to sing that to me all the time. Really? Mm-hmm. Did you slide really? What is, did you sleep well after hearing that? Yeah. It's hearing that? Yeah. It's fucking standard.

When the ghost and ghouls go on holiday, the whole town may rejoice that their children may not be stolen in the night. Sure. But that only happens every couple of years to come back. No, sure. I mean, I guess in even in my world, a lot of the songs that we sing to children are kind of scary and more. Oh, go ahead and sing one. No, you just don't want to talk about his world. mean, I guess in even in my world a lot of the songs that we sing to children are kind of scary and more Oh, go ahead and sing one. No, you just want to talk about his world. Yeah, I just true

I don't want to talk about our stuff. Although I do I will say and this is I don't share a lot of personal stuff from home But this is I actually came up with a little by that I sing to my baby, but I did sing like baby And I still oh let me interrupt it. Go ahead Yes, go ahead You know and sometimes when I'm feeling lonely here in Funos, I'll sing it to myself. Oh, let me get this face. You sing this to yourself?

Yeah. Yeah, he just asked me if I was going to... Now, John's, John's, John's, Arnold is trying to share something very tender and important. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just going to give him an opportunity to add to it. Being very vulnerable. I'm just saying.

He's a good, good, good, good, good, good, good. I love you, I love you, good you good night. I love you I love you good night. Good night. Stay close to me when there is no light. I love you. I love you good night You have any questions about that chat no No, that was that was very sweet I'm sorry for everything but you could just say game in licton comber Though light light would appear does it make you sad to know that your wife and daughter moved up We don't know that my wife and I know Your child we take that my child has not been taken although it does seem like there like a lot, like so there's a lot of child mapping going on by ghouls and goblins and fune. Well, you just have a child, you have to assume

that they'll be taken somewhere, raised by someone else. You know, you've got like a 50, 50 shot of raising your own child that seems like pretty good to me. That's why we have large litters. Yes. I had 16 brothers and sisters. Wow. 15 of them were taken.

I was the lucky one. Wow. My of them were taken. I was lucky one. Wow. My mother came from a tribe of 40 dwarfs. 40? Holy cow. No. Uh, Sarapot's troll and pot dwarf? Uh, yes, I've got some troll on my mother's side.

Oh, yeah. And Dwarf is on my father's side. And I sometimes get a mixed up. I'm not too close to either of them. Oh, I see. You're a melting pot of your fat control a drill a drill What well you're a way your woe is welcome here the vermilion minato. We've we've loosened up our policies about the types of creatures that are Allowed in and out in any daily basis. Yeah, please complete John's night. I love to have to

Yes, I was John's night. It's It's just a variety show I put together. Oh, yeah. Arnie still hasn't been, but I will not be. Hey, you know what? Maybe we should hear another song from you guys, though, if you don't mind. Of course. This is a song we play.

We play a lot of funerals. A lot of death and fame. Yes. With a lot of life. A lot of life and fun. Yes. With a lot of life. A lot of life. That's true. Much more death, but life and... So funerals always really pay the bills.

Yeah, I'm sure. Yes, usually get a couple of tips. People do ask for sex and pay a little extra for it. Oh, and the funerals. Yes, funerals sex is the best. I'll probably ask sex, are you a funeral artist? Oh no, John. John word friends, right with your funeral aren't you? Oh no, Chuck. Chuck were friends right? You guys want a play?

Now we are gathered here today to lay this man to rest. We've collected all our favorite foods and laid them on his chest. We sit around his body now as though we were a table and laugh and dine and sing our songs until each other fables. Wow, I mean, it's cool that I'm learning kind of how funerals work here in food So everyone like sits around the dead body. You put your favorite foods on the dead body. It's a little weird But it's it sucks. The main reason it sucks when the child dies is because it's a table so small so you don't get a ton of food So I just I want to go because I'm not going to get full Yeah you maybe get like a little Apertine They then pass around our pets and make them dance on him

We then give them the signal and they all bite off his limbs Now here is his last chance to tell us if he's not really dead And if he tells us nothing then we may remove his head Oh so they get a chance to say if they're not dead or not. Okay, well that's it's only common courtesy. No, because sometimes people play Coyne and are like, I'm dead and then it's like, no wait. Oh, I had, I had quite a bit of fun about 40 years ago. I pretended to be dead at a big party. Everyone ate off my chest and brought up the pets and had them dance around.

They're right as they're about to chop off my head. I was like, no! We throw the head in the river now and we visit trifts away. Then we throw the torso in the trash and all is happy and gay. That's all is happy and gay. I heard a rumor that Arnie is gay. I heard that rumor quite a while ago. Then that is always the first rumor of phone about everybody. And I stopped spreading that around.

I heard that you were transgender. No, it's okay. I mean, I fucked a tiny horse in his two blood. Yeah, and you are, Jim. I don't mind if you're gay. Yeah, that is absolutely true. And I think that is frequently transgender. Oh, sure. Absolutely, yes.

It means, yes, of course. means, yes of course. Yeah. So I kind of want to get back to this funeral thing, though, so at these generals, and you just sort of rip the body apart and cast the parts different places. Yes, of course. You throw the head into the river. OK.

Make sure you wave good and hard. You want them to see it. Is that what you do with your dead? No, we, I mean, we do, we either just bury them in the ground, which I guess is kind of a waste. Or you burn them up. You bury them like you are planting a flower? Does a new person grow from where you bury? Oh, no, no. Oh, no, it's, we just got a lot of, I guess, hey, you know, you're right point taken. Wait, what was the second thing you said? Sometimes we just burn them up and then put the ashes in an urn or size the size of the dark lords. Maybe they have the the dark lord and my

half some reach in my world that I had no idea about. I must travel this earth. We got time for another song. Yeah, yeah. Speaking of Wizard State. Yes, I have actually I have heard of Usidor from afar. His name is spoken of quite highly in Hawaii, a more gorable strain of that bearing his name has run rampant on the island and several teens have died, but it's always been good to me, I've got a good eye off it. But I've actually been on a quest myself to find Lucidor.

Since my pussy's been set afire, I want to make sure that no one else has pussy be set afire. And that is why I believe that Lucidor is the one man. Who can save us all? There is a man. He's so much more than a man. I shan't reveal his name. Bent, undarkless and untruthy. He said my boss, Afrin. But there is...

So much more than a man. And who can this... Man me? On the quest of the lightboard in the dark night. Who? Can she be? Who's the daughter? Who is the daughter? 12th realm of Ephesians.

Master of light and Shadow, and Devourer of Chaos, Wusador, Sheldon, Great Wars of Dragons, The Elves Climbed, The End, Yolling and Thee, and of the North is he is known as Gasmone He has made star Who is there? Who's there? I just want you to know I found a reason for me To change who I used to be

A reason to save all of the phone And the reason is you And the reason is food. And the reason is the quest of the night Lord in the dark night. Oh, see, don't... Holy shit! These stores... Quaah! I've...

Did you make a spell to see where your eyes turn into waterfalls? No, I'm quite touched by this song, and I... I must ask you, Glenn Spatz, will you join me upon my quest? I mean, I feel like my quest is done. I'm finding you. Okay. We've got a game next week. I'm passing the baton to you.

I see. But please come play, Johnstank. Of course, I'll be there. Okay, that's great. We list treacherous journey. Yeah, that sounds... I mean, I don't have Of course. I'll be there. It's a way, way less treacherous journey. Put it in my manner. Yeah, that sounds, I mean, I don't have any toes. That was beautiful though. Thank you.

No, it was gorgeous. Thanks so much, guys. It's been a real pleasure having you. I don't wear you off to now. Are you sticking around Hogsface or? We'll be here for a couple days. I'll probably head back to Donston. OK.

I'm asleep under the bar tonight. Oh, wow. OK, well, you know, if you guys are ever in Hogsface, please, you have an open invitation. You guys are incredible. I'm a big fan of you guys now. Thank you. And anyone out there, if you can check out Glen Miller and Spans, do you have like a name collectively as a band?

I'm just Glen and Spansy. Just Glen and Spansy. Just Glen and Spansy. All right, well, you know, just some real quick end of episode business. Please, if you'll enjoy the podcast, give us a good review on iTunes. Also, you can send us an email at magictavernatpuppies.supplies. I'll real, and also, chant.

Chant was 60, did you email like that? That's true. Chant, do you want to read? Did you get any emails? Sure, I'll read a couple emails. I got one from, this is Nicholas to Petrilo. He says, hey, Chant, big fan of the podcast. Is there any chance you could get your dad to come on? I don't believe you said yours is gay. I would love to have my dad on. I don't know. I never know when he's gonna swing by town. So you may already. I'm sorry. I'm so glad.

But no, I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm't know. I never know when he's gonna swing by town. So, you made it. You're already still crying. I used to say I'm sorry, I'm still crying. But no, I'm not gay.

For the record. But it would be wonderful if I was. Thank you for the compliment. Well, if you'd had swings by town, yeah, that'd be it. Yeah, I would love to have your dad on his guest. Let me a quick read one here. Hey, Arnie, sorry you're still stuck in food, but you seem to be making the best of it.

Maybe this picture I drew of you, Ch, and Yucidor will cheer you up. And there's this drawing here. I don't know if you got you guys. It's fantastic. Oh, it looks. Yes, it's wonderful. Although I'm a badger there, so. Yeah, well, yeah, in the picture of your badger, now you are a tiny horse. Although there is a tiny horse in this picture. Oh, yeah, there you go. He also asked, does Yucidor have a beard?

Or am I just stereotyping wizards? You know what, I'll make a point of maybe I'll tweet this picture out at the Follow Me at Magic Tavern on Twitter and this week I'll definitely tweet that picture. So rather accurate to picture? It is. Although the sign for the familiar and minotaur has a Chicago Bulls logo on it, which is not really, but I'm not going to explain our stuff. Anyway, thank you so much Ian Stewart. Thank you for that picture and that email. And thank you to Glenn Miller and Span's, and thanks to all the listeners,

and join us next week at the Magic Tavern. Thank you very much. Thank you. I'm just so happy. Listen to this. Mm. And. Where the hell, as catchy as all of that was, none of it was real. Chant was played by Abel Raphai.

Usador was played by Matthew Young. Special guests, Spence and Glenn Miller were played by Meredith's to-pean and Nick Gage. Meredith and Nick both perform and write for the musical theater company Star Kid and also have a band, Jim and the Poverloas. You can find their music on something called iTunes and something called Spotify. What were those names I made up for the producers of the show again? I left my notes in the purple room, I'll need to go get those. Hello? Hello? If you can hear this, my name is Kern. For as long as I can remember, I've been orbiting around the press-forn galaxy. And I need help immediately,

for you see, I've had the same song stuck in my head during this entire voyage. You know the one that goes, do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do Camp, Evan Joukouver, and Ryan DeGeorgie, edited by Ryan DeGeorgie, music by Andy Polent. Hello from the Magic Tavern logo by Allard LeBan. Learn more about the show and the fantastical world we've haphazardly assembled at HelloFromTheMagicTaven.com or follow us on Twitter at MagicTaven. How much more not really happening can you get than having a Facebook page? Visit the page for hello from the Magic Tavern on Facebook today.

All of these fanciful imaginings were brought to you by Basecamp with the help of the Chicago Podcast Cooperative. Learn more about Basecamp at Basecamp.com and the Chicago Podcast Cooperative at ChicagoPodcastCoop.com