Hello From The Magic Tavern - 18 - Blemish

Episode Date: June 30, 2015

Blemish, the creepy guy who works at the Vermilion Minotaur and brings us spiced potatoes is going to be our guest this week.CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungBlemish: Martin WilsonOtok Barleyfoot: Nick BaerMysterious Man: Tim SniffenProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgiEditor: Ryan DiGiorgiTheme Music: Andy PolandMagic Tavern Logo: Allard LabanYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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The following podcast is not real, but it is really sponsored by Field Notes brand, USA made memo books and other products including seasonal limited editions. Visit FieldNotesbrand.com or 400 North Maid. Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of fun. I'm your host Arnie Neekham. If you haven't listened before, this is basically what's going on. A while back a few months back I fell through a magical schism behind a Burger King into the magical land of Foon. I'm still getting a slight Wi-Fi signal from the Burger King, I think through the

dimensional portal and I'm using that to upload a weekly podcast that I do here in the Vermilion Minotaur, a tavern in the town of Hogg's face in the magical land of fune. As always, I am joined by my boon companions, my dear friends, shunt the talking badger. Hello. With two blood holes, permanently. Two, don't rub it in. I'm trying to sleep with an elf now. Get that sweet sweet three-butthole triangle away after that. Third butthole. And Yusidor, the Blight- I am Yusidor, Wizard of the twelfth realm of Ephesius, Master of Light and Shadow, Manipulator of magical lights, Devour of Chaos, Champion of the Great Holes of Turokus. The elves know me as Fying York, the dwarves know me as Zodan and Hook Stangies, and I am

known in the northeast as gasmoaneous maestor And there may be other secret names you do not know Is everything okay, aren't it? What's that is everything okay? What yes? You missed something. Oh, who bestang. Yeah, are you all right? I? I don't know I Missing Sarah and I am missing I'm missing my wife and child back on earth Do you remember your child's name wasn't it nice get my name clean though for a change? Oh, it's great You know what I you know I was thinking about though really the thing the distract me from saying who bestank is that your your

Elvish name Sounds like feline zelek Which is which is like a cat and that's a Woody Allen movie. I don't want to explain earth stuff I have I have a request for a future episode. Mm-hmm. I want to do an earth stuff episode an earth stuff You know earth stuff is not that interesting I would love to cuz cuz here's something and I don't know if you know you're doing this But I'm gonna call you on your bullshit. You just said that sounds sounds like feeling zelek and then you say that's a Woody Allen movie And then as soon as you drop that bomb you say I don't want to talk about earth stuff

Do you know what a fucking dick tease you're being? Okay fine. We will do an earth stuff Thank you. Wonderful. I want to go to Woody Allen is the people the people on earth are gonna be so bored by it because they already know about earth stuff But we have so many questions for you. They'll be able to experience it through our eyes. It'll be fresh to them as if the world is a newborn babe and they are experiencing it for the first time. I guess so. But anyway, speaking of your Elvish name, we have two guests.

One of them is half Elvish. It's Otock Barleyfoot, the owner and proprietor of the Vermilion Minotaur. That's right. They're happy to be back on the program. Hello. Otock. I love the Vermilion Minotaur. Also, I'm so happy that you're a sponsor of this podcast. Well, I appreciate being able to get my name out there. It hasn't really brought in a single worthwhile. Yeah, I know. Well, that's a problem. I think all the listeners are in mind dimension earth But as soon as people on earth find a way to get here you are going to be the most

This is gonna be the first place people are gonna stop. They're gonna want for a million minute tour t-shirts They're gonna want to get drinks here spice but two so they're gonna they're probably not gonna want the spice potatoes Because that doesn't really appeal to an earth palette. Oh, I mean it feels the most palates sure really appeal to an earth pallet. I mean it appeals to most pallets. Sure. But we're also joined by another person, a person that works for you here at the Vermilion Minotaur. Blemish. My name is Blemish. I've worked at the Vermilion Minotaur all my life. My father worked at the Vermilion Minotaur and his father before him. It's true. Wow. Yeah His father worked for my father and his grandfather worked for my grandfather my father was named bumble My grandfather was named Bimbo Bimbo all have served at the feet of

Oh, well, I would be there for a feed I mean it's just at the ball you feed are they going to be sitting here the whole time? Are they going to bring us something to eat? You said, or there are guests. So, I know you're used to them sort of serving us. I've cleared your tables many times, zone in Hoogstandges. Oh, oh, my war was named. I am Heptwoff. Oh.

I thought your name was Boy. I have always answered to Boy. I have answered to many a thing in the Vamillion Minotaur. Many people call me many things, some call me nothing at all. To each I answer with the utmost courtesy speed and respect. Yeah. Yeah. There's no mention in boy. No, no, no, no, no, no, this is the thing he does. He's just kidding around. All of your drinks have been served. All of your meals have been carefully prepared. I thank you greatly for kidding around all of your drinks have been served all of your meals have been carefully prepared I thank you greatly for this all of your dishes

cleaned all by blemish blemish has seen all blemish has heard all blemish has cooked okay but we'll make the spice potatoes, whose family developed the spiced potato recipe. Well, I mean the barley feet in collaboration with, well sure, Bumble and Bimbo helped a long way. My grandfather Bimbo's recipe. Roast, Bimbo. Don't watch any of the dead. Actually, can I ask for something? I love when Yusudor goes into his chef cadence.

Can we do a quick segment? Could you tell us your recipe for rooster feet? Just like real quick your recipe for rooster feet? Yes, well, you find the youngest, most supper roosters. Chop off their feet while they're still alive. Take take those feet dig them in boiling oil and then cover them in a little dash of sage until they're crisp and crackly on the outside and then you can just crack them open and suck the sweet meats from inside. Can I get two orders of rooster feet, Blumish?

Of course. Thank you, Chop Chop. Thank you, boy. Well, look, guys, stop sending our guests away. Don't go. Oh, right. I'm so sorry. It's just habit.

No, it's all right. Blumish loves his job. OK, well, while we wait for Blumish to get the rooster feet, Ota, how have you been? I've been all right. It's been a tough few weeks. Yeah, I've been alive. A lot of've been all right. It's been a tough few weeks. Yeah, I'm not gonna lie. A lot of mishaps here at the Vermilion.

We're under a lot of construction right now, as you know. We had to have another march. Yeah, I have to feel like we're as money. A little responsible for. I think you're a lot responsible, aren't you? Well, I mean, it's not really our fault that Crowned the Barbarian. We had a guest on Crowned the Barbarian.

And while you incited Bar barbarian, and what happens? And he did destroy a lot of the bar, and did kill kind of a lot of people. And he learned a lot about himself. And it was kind of worth it for that. And I just, I wanna let you know, Otec, I'm so sorry, I got you caught up in this, and this week's open mic, and this week's chun's night.

All the proceeds will go to, you know, the repairs and I just wanna do some... 100%? Absolutely, I just wanna do some good, well-chanting, you know. No, no. Bruce does feet for all. Oh, bleh! Oh my gosh.

You're really just kind of a pier out of nowhere when you're naked, boy. I appreciate Arnold that you have learned my name blemish for low these many months you have referred to me as nothing at all. And soon more than Arnie will know the name of blemish all in the land of Foon, all will know the name blemish. It's true, I blemish is gonna be performing at chunt night.

Oh, what chalice though. Angry song. Wow, I would love to hear an angry song. Yeah, you come to Chunch night. Oh He usually takes like a rumor he's heard and then he uses that as inspiration. Sometimes it's just verbatim into the song But he usually uses that as a one-timey thing about Arnie. Yeah, rumor. He heard about our hmm. Oh, blin a shy I would like a mead and a rumor I came prepared with the meat already Oh, there you go.

That is a good barmish. The roomer is the to darkness of wings. Oh, did you know that? Yeah. Yeah, we know. The veins? The veins in your temples are constantly just sort of frothing, is that? How about this roomer, Zonen?

The darkness envelops you. Me in particular. How about this rumor, Zonen? The darkness envelops you. Me in particular? You. Ah, well, that doesn't sound right to me. I have spoken and heard from many who have traveled through Hogsface to land's greater cities wider and more glorious. I have traveled all over food. I self too as well.

I have snuck into the rooms of many, I guess. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many. But I have snuck in the rooms of many.�, but I have snuck in the rooms of many. as well. I have snuck into the rooms of many, I guess. Blimeyesh. I have heard a snowman. I have listened to their whispers. Blimeyesh, I have stood outside as they defecated standing up. Oh, I did that once. I did that twice.

I did that twice. I did that twice, but Blimeyesh, please. You know, don't be such a... The darkness will envelop you. Zoned. Whoogs, Danji's. I'm still there, but blemish please, you know, don't be such a The darkness will envelop you, zone in, hugged stangies Oh, this is a, this is a dark portant What could it mean? Could it mean that my powers of light and shadows

will be overcome by the shadow, whether the dark lord himself shall cast some pall upon me? Why don't you scrape the bottom of the river and find out how it's done? Whoa! I made that into a positive thing. What? Take it back. In the dwarfish community, you will always be the scraper of the bottom of the river.

Some of the dwarves love me. Look guys, look, look, Blenish is in charge of a lot of food that we eat. Let's not... Can I tell you something happened to me? This is like a month and a half ago. I was asleep in my home and I woke up and standing over my bed in like an open mouth Silent scream was blemish just standing over my bed looking at me his mouth wide open and as he was doing like a silent scream a cat Crawled out of his mouth. What?

blemish. I was feeding on your night breath. What is? Seating on your night breath. What is the last? Seating it to be. I'm not sure that's the thing. I didn't see anything because I don't want to embarrass him. Like I want to be respectful, I know. He's going through a phase. Plumish, I mean, I've known him since he was a little guy.

But really, he's a slap-nuts at heart. Right, Bosh? We have a good time here. Otock, my master. They're master. Say, oh, he's just that's a fectionate thing. We're buddies. Oh, Otock, I just returned a f**k-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s**t-s** Tivia, yeah. Tivia is Otak's daughter that has been missing for some time.

Should I not think for a moment, Otak? That while I do seek to defeat the Dark Lord, and I use my great prowess as one of the most powerful wizards in all the food, that I have forgotten about, Octavia. Yay, my airy waking moment is consumed by it, and when I will travel to any town, I will ask for her, and I do find out all the bits of information that I can. I said that they saw her heading. I also posted a like a missing person's

on smigslist. Thank you. Now that seems useful but Fiennelec did you I mean did you track down this rumor? Did you do it? Did you follow up? No I came back here to do the podcast. I'm gonna head north tomorrow, though. Tomorrow, I had raised back to the mines, and straight north, did I find her? Oh, talk. As a fellow father, who is, you know, distance from me. Up in. I did not abandon my daughter, but as someone who...

She left me, you left her. I did. Wow. Yeah, I mean, in both of our cases, circumstances have kept us apart from our family. Fair. I, you know, I really hope that you find activity. I feel you're fatherly pain.

And if there's anything I can do to help that doesn't require me to leave Hogsface because I do need, you know, to do this podcast. Need? Well, is need the right word? Well, I spend a lot of the week trying to upload the podcast. It fails trying to upload the podcast. It fails. I mean, there's a lot of technical.

We don't want to hear about earth stuff. Yeah, but I don't want to talk about it. I am sort of curious about how he spends the rest of his week, though. I mean, you know, I walk around. I drink. I've been. I certainly doesn't help that around here. Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm, you know,

Arnie, if you really want to help, actually, blemish and I are doing another night search, oh, yeah, search the forest. Yeah, well, I know I wasn't a great help during the last night search, but I tried. No, you turned almost immediately around. It was just because someone whistled. Well, it was a very powerful whistle. And I thought that it was the falsetto marauders, who I've been told were very dangerous. They don't whistle, it's more of like a... You could also help out by coming to...

You still haven't been to a chance night. Yeah, I don't see that. Maybe come and talk about Woody Allen. No, it's not no if you care to follow Half a dwarf through Michingleshane forest You eyes will be open to the deepest darkest secrets that the natural world of food cannot There it is there is another cat whoa Is that doing in there?

There is a rumor that he who speaks with cats will rise to the highest heights. He who speaks with cats will rise to the highest heights. Sounds like a prophecy. There is a very little difference between rumor and prophecy. Is it perhaps that you've misinterpreted this prophecy that he who speaks with cats would speak to a cat and not actually Please don't please don't Oh, I want it back up a bit You said that Arnold should follow a half dwarf? Yes.

I am. Where are you gonna find... Oh, someone who is half dwarfed. Yay. I thought you meant half of a dwarf. Like it had gotten bisected. It was still alive somehow, and he was supposed to follow it. The bisected dwarf is a very powerful legend.

Oh, the legend of the bisected dwarf? On Earth, do you have bisectuals? People are bisected? No, we don't have bisectuals. Oh, that's a, it's not a common thing, but it's everyone's fault you see of a bisectual. Everybody's family has one, really. Sure.

The bisectual dwarf was born that way out of legend born. Uh-huh. It's more of a nursery rhyme. A lot of times in like... Is a nursery, could I hear the rhyme? Oh It's gonna bring back some memories Wemmish would you can you do the high part and I'll do the love Kim through the meadow glen And when he saw the baby he crept around again.

We should talk to him, that's right. Oh, alright. Oh, you're like... What? Well anyway, there's about 15 more verses. Wow. It is a legend, not a no-spear. Oh, that's a blamish.

I have a question for you. You seem very tense and unhappy. Why would I seem anything but happy? My life of servitude and the servitude of all who have come before me is the greatest honor I can aspire to. I have a one-time... ...cleaning the urine holes in the Vamilian Minotaur and polishing the barleywood roots is the greatest dream that a half dwarf could ever aspire to I am living my highest ideals. I think you're living a bit above your station, frankly Yes, his fists are clenched so tight they're dripping blood

Well, let's do something fun. I think we should I think we tonight dripping blood. But let's do something fun. I think we should, I think we tonight, for blemish, we should serve him. We should all go to the bar and make him something, get him something to drink. What do you say? What do you say? Yeah, what do you want, Blaine? I would like each of your hearts flayed and sauteed and served to me in a stack on a

platter. How about just like a bowl of sugar? Get over here, you knucklehead! He's been a slap nut! I've slapped all of your nuts! And soon I will slap even more! He said it's goofy shit like that all the time. Can't tell if he's joking.

Come on, boy. Hey, let's take a quick break. And we'll... Hey, Arnie. Oh! That's not... Guys, let's not start the slap, that's all right, let's take a quick break. Play some notes on.

Cool, we're going to have a seven dragon to the baby, it's always a good hit. Let's do it. Seven dragons and a baby sitting in their nest. The baby dances round the dragons while they take their rest The baby understands that danger knows he must be careful And if he is successful then the dragons make him waffles Seven dragons and a baby marching on the town The villagers are fearful but the baby comes and down

Explains to them he understands that dragons can be awful, but if they want some breakfast, yes, that dragons make them waffles. Seven dragons end up babysitting on their throes. The empty room before them filled with bags and skulls and bones. A town'sman stands before them mendid Sistaces and loful The dragons cure the townsmen And the baby makes them waffles And we're back. And here, uh, ran a spiced potatoes for everybody, which I when got myself.

Oh, thank you so much. Thank you, Alan. Please. The tables have turned, and they will turn once more. Yes, you'll go back to doing your regular job. Yes, the tables will turn. Yeah, as soon as this podcast is over, actually, because you've got a year and hold it. I was just standing. this really, disgusting.

Oh, okay, come on. I didn't fit so many cats inside of you. Blumish, can I just put it out on the table? I hope this isn't too forward of a question. Are you evil? Great question. I serve at the Vermillion Minotaur. My family, my father, and his father before him have served the barley feet.

You serve anyone else? Oh, the cat that jumped out of his mouth just caught on fire. What? Hey, should we get that out of here? No, get that out of here. The sign of the dog, Lord! Oh, he just walked by a candle, that's true. Look, I don't want to speak for blemish, but he's just a mixed-up kid.

All right, I mean, he's not evil. I mean, did. He's really just staring us. Here's how you know, here's a little test. Okay, so blemish, you're in the forest and you come upon a child and the child looks like it's dying. You know, do you help the child or do you keep walking? Is there a third option?

Or do you keep walking? Is there a third option? Oh, I guess you could kill the child to hasten the death, which I guess is a mercy of some sort. My fourth option would be kill the child and wear its skin. Thank you for that test. Why didn't you just say that as a third option? Why did you make me have a third up? That is terrible. It's a sense of humor. option. Why did you make me have a third up? That's terrible. Okay, I see dark, dark jokes. Just, you know, chun used to work. Here you work with blemish back in the kitchen. I'm familiar with his, yeah, that's, I always

asked to not work the same shift as blemish. It makes me a little uncomfortable, but yeah, that's sweet guy. I'll make all of you uncomfortable in time. I think that time is now. You know, the potential for evil exists within all of us. Perhaps Blemish is just exploring this dark side of himself and should come out on the other end, the better man for it. His penis has been out the whole time. Wow! I just looked down upon this whole thing. Blemish. We talked about this once.

Tonight as your last zone in. To let us zone in. We said, keep it inside your roblets your robots these robots cannot contain me any longer Justice the familian minotaur can no longer contain blemish blemishes rise will be swift blemishes justice will be brutal blemishes power will be unbridled What are you gonna do? You said you're going to do something to me tonight. You didn't finish that thought. I will open my roblets.

As you sleep, Zonen. You're going to go to my house at the top of the hill. You will wake with my penis on your pillow. I don't know if he should be serving food. He should not be working with food. Just joking. I'm seeing a chance tonight., see me, I've been so hungry. I'm seeing a chun's knife.

It's not. He's slum. He's dark, dark humor. You're the war of a humor escapes me. Well, Otock, thank you so much for sponsoring the podcast. Absolutely still looking for some return on it. Yeah, that'll absolutely happen. Those are still staying in one of our best rooms. I know, I know, return on it. Yeah, that'll absolutely happen. Because you're still staying in one of our best rooms.

I know, I know, it's great. And I would just like to say to all of our listeners, the best room in the Vermilion Minotaur is great. If you come here, you're going to want to stay here. And the service is a little spotty. Well, Arnie, can I just say again that you can empty your own piss pot? I just wanted to drop some hints, but.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's always full to the brim. Oh, I guess in my world, I'm just used to... We don't wanna hear about you, right? Okay. And Blumish, you seem to be really on edge today. Are you, have you been suggesting that you're like giving you like your two weeks notice or something?

I'm not really sure. I have never been happier to serve at the Vamillion Minotaur. It has been a great honor to share this table with you all to speak and to have my name spoken. Soon Moore will speak my name. Moore will know me by face and sight but for now I return to the kitchen and took Arnie's pisspot. The pleasure was ours boy. Yeah, he's kind of sweet. Yeah, okay. Thanks. So get your uniform back on and clean that urine hole

back into my folds. Oh, hoof. Oh, talk, we should compare notes back to you. Oh, I would like that. Yeah, and if anyone out there has any word about Activia Barleyfoot or where she is, send word to us here at the Vermilion Minotaur so Barley foot, or where she is. Send word to us here at the Vermilion Minotaur, so we can help Otock out.

Yeah, and any, you can join a night search. Well, I'm just leaving some other different parties out on Sundays. I guess I'll say it since you never say it. And is Sarah, if you're out there, or you're going to run? Yeah, of course. If my wife is there,

you seem overly eager to help Otock in it. It seemed like you forgot to mention your wife and kid. No, oh, of course if my wife's there. You seem overly eager to help O-Talking and seem like you forgot to mention your wife and kid. No, no, of course. I think it goes without saying. My wife is listening to this podcast, which I can only imagine that she isn't, because otherwise I would have gotten, she would have emailed us at Magic Tavern

at puppies.supplies, which is how you get in contact with us here at the podcast. Can I just ask you guys one more question before we end. My wife's memorial death tree, just outside the tavern, got kicked over, knocked over, and I don't know. I'm an ambulance. Yeah, that was probably, I mean, I don't know anything about it.

Her remains were scattered. Here, eat this chocolate arrow. Oh, what? Oh, yeah, I don't know I don't know anything about that Chant the view gotten any emails. I have I got to eat several emails to chant the gmail.com chant of course with 60s I got an email here from Sammy Maine. I think I'm saying that right. She says hey chant long time listener first time emailer Just wondering something about your sexual pro-locivities, of course. Is it possible for shape shifters to only have sex for pleasure?

Also, how does reproduction children factor into your process? And are there little chuntlets running around? Thanks so much. Oh, chuntlets. Yeah, actually with shape shifters, what happens is you get, you have one sperm. So I have in a vial around my neck, I'll have a little chain, we each get one sperm, which I keep in that vial. That's what's in that vial? The one time that I want to have a child, we can only have one child, I will take that sperm out of the vial,

put it in my penis, and then the next person I have sex with will become pregnant. So it's a one-time deal. I have no, you know, in the foreseeable future I have no intention of using that sperm, but I always keep it on me just in case you meet the one. Sure. Okay, well I got an email from Jeff Hansen who says, please let let you sit or know that I'm pricking my finger with a rose of a thorn, fucking idiot wizard, sincerely, Jeff Hanson. Uh...

What-what-why does that make me an idiot? Well, I think he-I think he- Did he drop the blood into a stool of water as I suggested? He probably missed that. To speak to me? That's a step. But you know, we an a-cord, and then bury it into the ground,

and then we upon the ground where it is buried. Oh, wow. You know, we've gotten a lot of emails actually about people trying to contact you, Yusidor. Yes. And not being able to. Elizabeth Clark says, Hey guys, on one of the podcasts,

Yusidor said that if we wanted to get in contact with him, we could look into a mirror and say his name three times. Well, I tried it, and when it was over, I only saw myself. Does this mean that Usidor and I are linked on some sort of cosmic subconscious plane? Could I be the female, Earth equivalent of him? Or is it more like Twitter where you see the people who attempt to make contact via mirror by saying your name three times, but simply refuse to respond? If the former, I may have to re-evaluate my life

decisions. If the latter fuck you, I'm a healthy, extremely attractive, 31-year-old woman, who would have been willing to, with you, on a crusade to destroy the Dark Lord, your loss. Oh, well, I'll check my mirror when I get home. Also, I believe Butthole Wann can reach you by eating a bag of dicks, is that right? Oh, really show up the vermilion mentor any fucking nice. Yeah, it's just dropped by. But you said, I think there's some healthy, extremely attractive, this woman makes a point of saying, a woman trying to get in contact with you.

I think there's people out there that are really, they want some of the Yusidor magic. I've heard something a little a little similar. I got an email here. It says hey boys I'll get straight to the point can change into a human and if so does he look identical to them say for example He had quotas with a female redhead Brit Brit is it like British it's a country if he had Quotes with a female redhead Brit would he become a redheaded lady boobs and all? I'm creeping myself out cheers Emily. Yeah, I mean I would become whatever she is. Guys, I think there are people in my world listening to this podcast that are becoming deeply attracted to you too. I also got on Twitter someone named Crash Test Karen says,

what's Yusidor's Thai Pash tag asking for a friend? That's all very flattering but I'm afraid there's a little I can do about it. I'm here at food and they they trapped upon Earth this flat-boying world. We know nothing about so I assume that Should they find their way here? They are certainly more than welcome to join my quest And anyone's welcome to join me at makeup point and I'll have a good do not recommend Yeah, people of earth is you come here do not go to makeup point with chant use it or I think a lot of people are trying to get in touch with you So maybe sometime this week will spend a little time on my computer and we'll try to set you up on Twitter

me yeah, I Don't want to watch well Okay, then we won, then we won't do it. Well, you think about it, and we'll see. I'm very busy here in food. I don't have time for your non-stensical idea. We'll see. All right.

Also, give us good reviews on iTunes. And you can get Magic Tavern t-shirts. You should wear a shirt, a chunch shirt, just the logo of our show. Arnie shirt, there is not, as far as I know, I'm Arnie shirt. I'm surprised. You shot so am I, I'm sure there will be one.

I was thinking another design might be a man sitting for a tie-a-week waiting to do this one show. Yeah, or just a man shrugging, and it just says, I don't wanna talk about earth stuff. Yeah, I like that one. Yeah, well you can look for all those things at magic tavern dot and arberties T E S Is that a great stuff? Dot com and thank you so much for listening. Thank you otak. Thank you blenish. Thank you to make shingle shame forest follow me follow me

Where did he go? Tell me it's Brenton. Pardon me while I finish this crossword puzzle. Hmm, four letters starting with R, clue what the magic tavern isn't. Ah yes, real. Chant was played by, wait for it, don't wait any longer, Adel Rathai. Usador was played by Matt Young. O'Talk Barley Foot was portrayed by Nick Bear. Special guest Blemish was played by Martin Wilson. Martin has no other performances to plug as he spends most time tending to his family with mixed results. Follow Martin on Twitter at Martin Eye Wilson.

Ah yes, wouldn't you know it Glenn Miller and Spence were back with another song. They were played by Nick Gage and Meredith Steppian from the band Jim and the Poverlos. Their song, Seven Dragons in a Baby, was a cover of the song that listener Matt Maydor sent in a few weeks back. I think I still have it here somewhere. Here it is. Seven Dragons. Alright, that's enough of that.

Hello from the Magic Tavern is produced by Arnie Neacamp, Evan Jacover and Ryan DeGeorgie, edited by Ryan DeGeorgi, edited by Ryan DeGeorgi, music by Andy Poland, hello from the Magic Tavern logo by Allard LeBan. Learn more about the show and see for yourself how it's not real because it's fake. At hellofromthemagictavern.com, or follow us on Twitter at Magic Tavern. Don't forget that hello from the Magic Tavern has a Facebook page. What could be further proof that none of this is really happening? This wondrous ball of lies was brought to you by Field Notes with the help of the Chicago

Podcast Cooperative. Learn more about Field Notes at FieldNotesBrand.com and the Chicago Podcast Cooperative at Chicagopodcastcoop.com