Hello From The Magic Tavern - 22 - Sarah

Episode Date: July 30, 2015

She's here! Somehow my wife, Sarah, is in Foon. I've been chasing her through McShingleshane forest for the last two weeks, but now she's here!CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal... RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungSarah: Sarah MaherSpants: Meridith StepienMysterious Man: Tim SniffenProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgiEditor: Evan JacoverTheme Music: Andy PolandMagic Tavern Logo: Allard LabanYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:32 The Followering Podcast is not real, but it is really sponsored by cards against humanity. The Followering Podcast is not real, but it is really sponsored by Cards Against Humanity. They asked us not to read an ad. Enjoy the show. Hello from the Magic Tavern! A weekly podcast from the magical and a fun high. I'm your host Arnie Neacamp. If you haven't heard the podcast before, here's what's going on. A while back, several months back, I fell through a magical portal behind a Burger King into the magical land of fune. Luckily, I still
Starting point is 00:01:32 have my podcasting equipment with me, and I'm getting a slight Wi-Fi signal from the Burger King, so I'm hosting a weekly podcast here in the tavern, the Vermilion Minotaur, in the town of Hogsface, in the land land of Phoon. Normally I have been separated from my wife and my child and luckily I have been recently reunited with my wife Sarah. Hi! Yay! Oh my gosh so much so much to catch people up on from recently. But first let me introduce my my Boon Companions, my regular co-hosts, Chant. Hi, and Sarah, it's a pleasure to meet you. Oh, hi, it's a nice meeting you, uh, good friends. Yeah. I've heard a lot about you. Oh, great. Yeah. And?
Starting point is 00:02:12 Sarah, it is a pleasure to meet you. For I am Yusudor, Wizard of the 12th realm of Ephesius, Master of Light and Shadow, Minipulator of Magical Delights, The Vowr of Chaos, Champion of the Great of chaos champion of the great holes the Taurakis Beeline Selik the dwarves nobby is zoning who exchanges and I am known in an orthes discuss Wayne is based on and There may be other secret names See it's just as long as I told you about yeah, so nice nice to meet you. It's so nice to put faces to names. It really is. See, same here.
Starting point is 00:02:48 And you have great powers. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Sarah Rock hem. It's Sarah. It's Sarah Mahar. Yeah, Sarah Mahar. I didn't take Arnie's name when we got married.
Starting point is 00:03:03 Why would you? It's already a good name. I agree. So what, I mean, what's going on? Yeah, I know, I'm sorry. I literally, we just showed up just in time for the podcast. This is what happened. Two weeks ago, Sarah appeared in the Vermilion Minotaur, like in the front door and ran off into the woods.
Starting point is 00:03:18 I guess she must have been disoriented, confused, transporting into this magical land. I chased her into McShingleshane forest. And guys, let me tell you, I went deep into the forest. It gets really dangerous. Oh, you know, not the dangers that dwell within McShingleshane. Well, I was attacked by giant spiders. I was one of them. Yeah, I was attacked by a displacer beast. I was attacked by squirrels. A Displacer Beast. A Displacer Beast. You guys don't know, I know what a Displacer Beast is.
Starting point is 00:03:48 Oh no, I know what it is. I just didn't realize there were any within Mixing Shingles' Force. Yeah, and it was like I was fighting for my life chasing Sarah. This one on for a long time. I finally caught up with her. We were reunited. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:00 And now we're back. And somehow she's made it here to Thun. Yeah. And it's great like I can share this magical place. That's incredible I mean not not only your story, but the fact that Sarah is willing to still I mean this is incredible I know for sure that you guys that she would have moved on and No, we can talk later. I don't love you yet. You did move on, but yeah, I mean it's exciting. It's I mean I've never seen Arnie so happy has your union been consummated again well I mean we are marries sorry I asked yeah is the burger potentates responsible for your transference and to food the burger the burger king oh uh burger king you know it's it's more Ernie's thing than mine
Starting point is 00:04:47 But you know trying to dress I'm trying to go. Yeah, how do you find yourself transported into our world? Well, no, it was it was the dimensional rift at the Burger King. That's how I got here, but Yeah, I'm just like really happy to be back. I know that Arnie like really missed me. And, yeah. See? She know the whole time I was gone. She did not doubt me. To be fair, she said that Arnie missed her. Well, I felt it.
Starting point is 00:05:14 I felt it and I knew it. And, you know, now that we're back together, I know that he's really happy. Can I, I don't know, can I meet the little spice potato? Oh, what? Maybe your little spice potato your baby our daughter is not Not here. No, but she's okay. So you sure me that the babies and babies take care of themselves I mean I have to be honest. I didn't I wasn't honest With you Arnie about
Starting point is 00:05:40 Or baby You know, I didn't leave her with a baby sitter It's not Arnold's. First of all, Tarny. Second of all, it's my baby. All right. I just wanted to tell you while you were with friends to have some sort of coping skills with friends, but she was stolen by a Gremlin.
Starting point is 00:06:00 Is it like a goblin? A goblin! It's a goblin okay I don't know what you're done a goblin stole your baby a goblin first of all a goblin stole my baby here it did the baby did you bring the baby with you to the portal or did the I don't understand it the goblin steal the baby on earth what it got stolen in Chicago change Chicago was it was it I don't think so I mean I didn't What um it got stolen in Chicago. Change Chicago? Was it Rumble Steltz-Gablin? No it was not, I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:06:29 I mean I didn't think Rumble Steltz-Gablin was real, but maybe... No, it was just like you know you're run of the mill goblin. Like didn't have anything to do on a Tuesday. Took the baby. I'm sure it's gonna be returned at maturity. But this happened on Earth or in food. It happened in Chicago? In Chicago.
Starting point is 00:06:51 Oh my God. Is it Chicago or Chicago? It's Chicago, it's Chicago. Yeah, it's Chicago. It's Chicago, it's Chicago. It's Chicago, it's Chicago. So there was a goblin on Earth. I thought you said that won't go up.
Starting point is 00:07:01 There are, you know what I know. I don't know, look, she's been very, look, I'm sure she's very disoriented she's in a magical and she hadn't been here before for land our baby has been kidnapped by either a goblin or gremlin either Chicago or here in Fune all right babies probably being repaired for the race war well I mean if it got kidnapped in Fune I mean it has a 20% survival rate. Oh, no! That's pretty good! No, it's not that's bad, sir!
Starting point is 00:07:28 It's Thai, right? No, that's good! Oh, wait, that's bad. I mean, that's bad. That's bad. This is really bad. This looks like Arnie needs a minute. Just, I mean, just that Yusunor wanted, we want to take advantage of this.
Starting point is 00:07:39 Arnie never wants to talk about Earth stuff. Can we ask you about Earth stuff? Because he never wants to talk about it. Yeah. I mean, why not? I know. What does Arnie do like in his day-to-day life in art? On it. Oh, Arnie in his day-to-day life on earth usually, you know, he has had a run of a couple of podcasts. So he will work on his podcast and then, know he'll usually sit around for the rest of the week not do much You know he watches some television shows He's not the most helpful, you know, I've asked him to come out with me on a couple of quests. He won't do that Oh, yes, what's where he's also mentioned a couple of times he'll who make a little joke quests he won't do. Oh, yes. Well, he's also mentioned a couple of times.
Starting point is 00:08:26 He'll make a little joke, and he'll say, get this smug smile on his face. Always so smug. And then he'll say, it's like a smashmouth song. What's a smashmouth? Yeah, what's an all-star? I mean, a smashmouth's a it's a earthly beast With a large mouth
Starting point is 00:08:51 Who smashes you know probably like small ferrets into his own mouth? Sarah you know what is Smash mouth is your favorite band on earth. I thought you didn't wanna talk about earth. No, I don't wanna talk about earth stuff. I'm just a little confused. First of all, our baby has been abducted. And second of all, smash mouth is your favorite band.
Starting point is 00:09:13 That's all the music you listen to. You know what I mean? I wanna think of Sarah Mahar, I think. Love smash mouth, her favorite band. Only things you listen to. You know you're right. You're right. I love it, it's a band. Smash mouth is a band that I like. Only things you listen to. You know you're right. You're right.
Starting point is 00:09:25 I love it. It's a band. Smash mouth is a band that I like. It's a musical. Yeah, you'll always say smash mouth and then you'll say like something about walking on a son. Yeah, walking on the sun. What's that? That's a song.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Can you sing a great reference? Will you sing it? No. Is there really easy? Yeah. Is there really easy in walking on the sun? Yeah, sing your favorite favorite song working on the sun Excuse me walking on the sun. I am walking on the sun. I go towards the Lord. I am walking on the sun
Starting point is 00:09:57 I hope nobody I am going towards the Lord. Oh, yes Is it the are you going towards a dark Does Smashmouth know about the dark Lord? I mean, the sun is a big fiery ball. I don't know. You just say Lord, right? Yeah. Hmm, what? It's eye.
Starting point is 00:10:15 Wait, you know what, something is, I mean, look, I know you're probably just disoriented. I'm so disoriented. But despite your disorientation, I must ask you a question. Sure hit Sarah Mahler. Yes Will you join me upon my quest to defeat the dark lord? Now is the time to get your game on let's go play What are chips of hoi? Oh Well chips chips chips of hoi are
Starting point is 00:10:44 It's like a nautical. it's like a not a cool it's like a not a cool thing. It's like a band of slimy eels that they usually will fashion the elder eels into some sort of raft and the younger eels will then take to the water and and go find chips. No, no, no, no, thanks. You, I think, you know, I maybe you're just a little dehydrated and confused. We've been in the woods this whole time. Was it wrong? Let's take a, no, yeah. I'm so dehydrated. No, you're saying, sure.
Starting point is 00:11:12 You know what Arnie, just like, don't forget, like I love you a lot. And like I definitely want us to like, work it out and like stay together. Yeah, get a free room. Yeah. Okay, let's get her some water. Let's take a break. Let's get her some water Remo blood arrest you can get gather her wits back together when love rainbow balls. Oh, you know what?
Starting point is 00:11:32 What? Arnie didn't know what why would white you let us already I Let's take a break Spants here This next tune is for chunt Once here, this next tune is for Chant. I wrote it the night after you let me pet you for an hour under the bar, and I hope you like Chantry music. I don't care what you are You will always have my heart Whether you're a tiny horse with two buttholes Or a badger with just one
Starting point is 00:12:11 You could be a dwarf whose butthole is full of hearts Or an impose butthole proves out hearts Or a bird that's butthole is its dick Or a tree whose butthole is a stick Or the impose but butt hole is the moon, or cow with the biggest butt hole in food, or a house whose butt hole is the door, or a song whose never seen a butt hole before, or a skull with the butt hole on its face, or a guy with butt holes all over the place, a bear with a butthole that's inside out Or a butthole who's butthole who's its mouth Or an arnie who's butthole who's overwhelmed Or a burger who's butthole who's a magical realm
Starting point is 00:12:56 I don't care what you are You will always have my heart You could have a triangle but we're lacking Elf, but would I really want chun't? If I'm being real honest, it's the one day look at you and see my soul. While great and soft, we've spent with a little accompaniment from Bret Hart, that's not that Bret Hart, from people on earth, it's just... That was amazing, I mean...
Starting point is 00:13:30 Yeah, and I could've used a few more bubbles and that's... That was huge, that was amazing. That was amazing. Span's has come here. I am a thing for you, little... I'm a pain absex with it. I'm a little taken, I might bust out some rubies and coins. Are you possibly...
Starting point is 00:13:42 I mean, that was... I touched, I don't know what'sies and coin. Are you possibly, I mean, that was, I'm touched. I don't know what's the same touch. Why? I told her that the earth has a bell hold. It's called the moon. That's what you told me, right? No, right.
Starting point is 00:13:52 Well, I don't want to talk about it. It's not. Well, I might have missed the appointment. Now, now I realize this is a wonderful case. You've been reunited with your wife But you know things are happening with Chutton you should or two Yeah, I know you got what's going on. Are you okay? You said I fight? No, I've never seen them like this. I mean I just met you
Starting point is 00:14:22 Wait, he's in this this might be another thing. Inside the wizard's state, this might be the powder state. Oh. I don't know if that's a thing though. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait Look slippery just because my wife is here, you know my lifestyle is gonna change a little bit I have a little bit less time for boys night. Oh yay But you know you're still gonna be my buddy You know you're still gonna be my second best friend and Finn Who's your first best friend?
Starting point is 00:14:59 Oh, you're new. Thank you. Wait, but now I'm your first best friend and Finn. Well, you're my wife But like we're definitely best friends. Let's get these regains worked out immediately. Yeah. Well, okay. The order of things that are most dangerous in Phoon are dragon, wizard, flower, correct, more lord.
Starting point is 00:15:19 More state agent, correct. More glob, conversations about ranking friendships in front of your wife, right? And then carnival. Oh, yes, did you know that? Any has a secret name now? No, what's possible? Listen, first of all, this is not broadcast my secret name all the time. Connie Wilson. Yeah, Connie Wilson that's how that rules off the time really nicely Yeah, look let Wilson, that's out. That rolls off the tongue really nicely. Yeah. Look, let's not, let's not talk about me.
Starting point is 00:15:49 No, we can keep talking about you. That's fine. No, I, what's going on on Earth? What's going on on Earth? What have I missed? Have you been listening to this podcast? Have you listened to this podcast? The most important question.
Starting point is 00:16:02 How big would you say this podcast? How big is your podcast? Are you asking me how big your podcast? How big is your podcast? Are you asking me how big your podcast is in front of your friend? I'm just saying, is it like, I doesn't need to be the biggest podcast on earth. I'm just saying, is it like,
Starting point is 00:16:13 average to above average size for podcast? It's an above average, it's an above average podcast. Do you enjoy it as what I'm saying? Is it better? Is it? Is it like, is it a good? I mean, I've been really busy, so I I have to be honest I haven't listened to it. Is it sometimes like you're listening to the podcast and just sort of putting up with it dillet's over?
Starting point is 00:16:33 You know regardless of the size you know, I It's gonna you know and then roll over and turn like you say I mean I really take an abstinence only Stance with podcasts Once a week that's not too much seems like a healthy amountence only stance with podcasts. Just once a week, that's not too much. It seems like a healthy amount of time to listen to a podcast. Once a week, that's not asking too much. Yeah, 30 minutes. I feel like once you get married, sometimes you don't listen to podcasts as much as you'd like to.
Starting point is 00:16:56 I mean, it's a slippery slope. It's like a gateway drug to more. What do I have to do with it? You're a hill that you live to your house. Oh, slippery slope. Yeah. That's where my house is at slippery. Yeah, it is nickname slippery Sarah. Yes Who are the Chicago blackhawks? What where the Chicago blackhawks? They're the they're the hocks that set fire to Chicago 20 years ago That's wrong guys. What what? No, it is you haven't been to earth for a while. What?
Starting point is 00:17:25 It's changed uh Chicago's preeminent hockey team has turned into the hockey team yes the hockey team is that like a midden steve has yes it's exactly like a midden steve I mean uh what's your favorite what's your favorite position of midden? um I would say my favorite position is a miscellaneous. I mean, they're really underrated, but they work really hard. Like really hard. How does she know minns and you don't? Hey, don't!
Starting point is 00:17:52 You know what? Honestly, like, this is, I hesitate to put this out here in case I'm wrong, but I'm like 99.99% is, I don't know if that works. I'm really... The math isn't as strong. I definitely know. Okay, well anyway, I'm pretty competent. I don't think you're Sarah. I don't think you're Sarah. I don't think you're my wife. What? Who are you? Mmm. Oh.
Starting point is 00:18:17 Is she in the Pelletie state now? What? What's happening? I'm a memory groundland. I'm sorry I've been lying to you. I'm a memory groundland. Memory groundland? What? What sexual memory groundland?
Starting point is 00:18:35 No! Your wife is a memory groundland? No! Are you from Foon? I'm not from Foon. This isn't my wife. No. What is a memory groundland?
Starting point is 00:18:43 I heard that there was a human here and I just wanted to see if I could kill it, but you caught me. So I had to steal your memories in order to make you not kill me and the most memories you have are of your wife. Wait, this is not me. They weren't very complete. Look, these are the things I remember of my wife. She loves Smash Mouth.
Starting point is 00:19:00 It sounds right so far. And she probably doesn't listen to my podcast. There we go. Listen, originally I wanted to to eat you but then when we got to spend time together, you're pretty nice. I changed you for weeks to the woods and then the whole time you're just trying to get me to lure me to my death. Oh wait, wait, wait, huge, huge thing we had to clear up. You consummated. Oh yeah. Well, I mean, I already cheated on his life. Sarah, if you're listening, I mean already cheated on his life Sarah if you're listening I thought you was already fucked a memory glimmer No, I did I'm sorry. It was amazing everyone. I'm sure smakes are
Starting point is 00:19:35 Fucked a memory grandmother. I'm already fucked a memory. I hope we keep fucking That's your shirt. That's a shirt will make for you. Let's have your face and memory glimmer and say guess who I fucked I'm gonna be honest in my small town having sex with a human as a type of punishment that we give out but Little bit of sex just to touch up your Michigan A little bit of pure Michigan I'm just saying all the weird things you put in your beard about her. It's just a little bit of beard Michigan. He kept saying, oh, pear Michigan, oh, pear Michigan. Look, it was amazing.
Starting point is 00:20:09 I mean, he learned so much about a whole other realm just for his memories. Oh, I just want to fucking memories. Oh, I feel like you fucked my memories. I fucked all the memories. Arnold, you have made a huge mistake. I have to be honest, Lizard, I am enrolled in the university, and it is hard to meet men. So if I could bring you back to the university, you could just hang out with me and be my boyfriend. Where do you go? Are you at Phoenix?
Starting point is 00:20:36 I'm at Phoenix. I'm doing all my shirt. I'm wearing a Phoenix shirt. Where are you laughing? I don't know. You don't have Phoenix University in your room? We do. You have Phoenix University? Yeah, it's a different
Starting point is 00:20:46 I it's gotta be different. It's gotta be different. It's an online. I can't I don't like it. It's a what? It's different here. You go to the University and stay in the dormant way You go to the classes and every day a new teacher is born of flames and the old one burns up and a new one takes its place Which makes it really hard to fuck your teachers! It's very true. Can you kill a goat in conjure an image of smash mouth? Because I'm dying to them. Me too.
Starting point is 00:21:12 Guys, I've all the things on earth. Hey now! I need a goat! I've never heard you say hey now that lab. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Surely it's happening. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:21:22 He, uh, Arnie, can I ask you a question? Yeah. Are you lonely? Yeah, I am lonely. surely it's happening. He, uh, Arnie, can I ask you a question? Yeah. Are you lonely? Yeah, I am lonely. I mean, I miss my- but I'm married, and I thought I'd been reunited with my wife. Oh, can I ask you another question? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:37 If you weren't married, would you date me? I mean, would you look just like my wife? You do. I mean, I- of course, I mean, yes. And we can still have conversations based off of your memories. I don't, it just seems weird. It just seems a little weird. Based off your half-assed memories. Well, I've got to be honest. Based off of your memories,
Starting point is 00:22:00 you only listen to your wife half the time. So half the time, you're gonna really understand what I'm saying. I mean in my defense. She talks a lot Yeah, you're right. So if I only hear memories you're right. If I only listen half the time. That's a lot of listening That's a lot of listening. I know I must intervene. I do not believe you should carry on any type of relationship with this memory Correpplin. I believe it's just feeding its dark power by stealing your memories. And it's trying to use your wife's image to dig even deeper in. Oh, but I think it has a dark upper. This...
Starting point is 00:22:35 Brian, no, you are fated to help me in my quest for the Dark Lord! I will help you via this podcast, yes. And, yes, that's not really gonna help. Ah, but... You... You, memory, Correpplin. You have done the one thing You veer this podcast. And it's not really gonna help. Ah, but you, you memory Grimlin' You have done the one thing that is the second worst thing to do at food.
Starting point is 00:22:51 You've angered a wizard. Oh, you're lucky it's not a dragon. But you are unlucky that it is a wizard. You have hurt my friend. I've never seen Sparks by humans here. Ah! You're a stained- full of shron! Kitefou!
Starting point is 00:23:08 Ow. There, take that. The build up is a lot of stuff. I'm sorry. There's just a shape of an L on her forehead. What is that? Take that loser. Oh.
Starting point is 00:23:18 No, no one's. Now bear the mark of the loser for all your days and fun. She's probably already pregnant with Arnie's kid. Whoa, no! I don't even know what to say. This has really been a real roller coaster. We hear that my wife is here, and that's a memory grumbling. I refuse to believe that I've cheated on my wife.
Starting point is 00:23:40 Let's just move on. I believe it. These things happen. I'm sure I take a lot to explain. I'm sure my wife will understand. Have a quick question. Yeah. Would you go with me to my winter formal learning? I can. No. I just feel like it's going to complicate things. I think we just got to have a clean cut.
Starting point is 00:23:57 Clean cut. I'm sorry. It's not. It's not. I was going to say it's not you. It's me. It's you. It is you. I'm sorry. It's not even you. It's a it's you or someone else. Oh, ice cold, Arnie me it's you it is you I'm sorry. It's not even you it's a it's you're someone else Oh ice cold Arnie I was tricked okay, okay, let's just move on let's move on no Magam and bagam Is it crying or laughing? Chant if you got any emails this way. I got yeah, I got a couple emails here
Starting point is 00:24:22 Chant, have you got any emails this week? I got a couple of emails here. Chant, I feel like it's my duty to inform you that Arnie is withholding information about his world. And that's the fact. What could possibly be greater than a Snickers? And Candy Bar forge from one butthole, be hold. And then there's a picture. I saw in your picture, there was a picture.
Starting point is 00:24:38 It was like two skinny Snickers next to each other. And it's called the Twix. Twix? Yeah, that's amazing. It's aix Twix Yeah, yeah, I mean I don't I don't it's like two skinnier poops. Yeah, so Yeah, the Snickers is like a turd then Twix would be like a double but hole turd Well, that's what I want to twist. Yeah, you gotta have a twist The other email shun since you gotta figure out a way for people to send us stuff Yeah, I want to see the other email? Shun since you wait. We have to figure out a way for people to send us stuff. Yeah, someone could send us. I don't think Dawn is going to get anything here.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Well, I've been every Sunday, I try to push little notes through the little crack of the portal, the dimensional portal into the Burger King parking lot. So if you can go to that parking lot in Chicago with the corner of Irving Park and Clark, go to that Burger King if you can go to that parking lot in Chicago with the corner of Irving Park and Clark, go to that Burger King, if you can find the mention portal, just shove a snickers, shove some twigs through there, I actually really like Baby Ruth. Every Sunday you sense you sense something through though?
Starting point is 00:25:35 Is it? Every Sunday I try, wait, did you just say your baby's name? No, no, no. Ruth? Baby Ruth is a candy bar, it's something unrelated. It's maybe candy after a baby? I didn't know. Well, I mean, this guy is the guy Ruth is a candy bar. It's something unrelated. It's maybe candy after a baby. I didn't mean this kind of thing. I don't want to talk about it. That's the fact I found a memory from Arning where he goes there burging to silently cry in a corner every Sunday.
Starting point is 00:25:58 I just stressed. My life was a little bit stressful. It was just a little me time. Have to get away. Any other emails to you Chun since you wish to have two but holes in all of your shapeshifted forms wouldn't that mean that even if you did change into an Elf you wouldn't gain the benefit of a third but hole your fan Eric master of the house confounder variables Thordar of them oh, yeah, I did realize that eventually but So now I'm I've really painted myself into a two-butthole corner. Those blue tiger bones are real monkeys, Paul. How did you... how did you phrase it?
Starting point is 00:26:32 You know, wishes are very particular. If you said, I always wanted at least two-buttholes. There's nothing preventing you from having three. But if you said, I wish I had two-buttholes forever and ever. Amen. Yeah, I wish... I said, I wish that no matter what, I always I had two buttholes forever and ever amen. Yeah, I wish I said I I wish that no matter what I always have two buttholes Your stuck Yeah, why don't you say in fucking memory girl?
Starting point is 00:26:53 Do you guys know a little something about Arnie? No, he had it some but playing college But like a like a cocticklers play like like he had some but playing college He was a very drunk, very drunk. What role did you have in the butt play? Oh, he got his butthole finger. Oh, yeah. Oh, jeez. In college, I left.
Starting point is 00:27:12 What did I? Was it Chrome? Was it Chrome the barbarian? Hey, he might have mistaked you for a bear. Yeah. He couldn't ring a bear, though. That's a lot. That's a lot.
Starting point is 00:27:21 Did you get any emails earning? I did. I did get some emails. So if you want to try to If you want to email me at Magic Tavern at puppies that supplies, especially Sarah my wife email me We can talk about what happened. No, it's not email is a painting of smash mouth. I please don't do that Please do although I wouldn't mind a painting of Smash Mouth with all of us. Senate to Chunt with 60s at Gmail.com. Chunt with 60s at Gmail.com.
Starting point is 00:27:48 Send me all your Smash Mouth memorabilia, your paintings, your pictures, your lyrics. Erry, I win it all. Okay. All things Smash Mouth. This email says, hey, Arnout, it's Arnie. Who would win in a fight? Yousador versus Crom. I assume that would be...
Starting point is 00:28:05 Crom? I'd put my money on Yusador. I mean, Crom is big and large, but I have powers like Shuro to my very hands. I can control them and defeat anyone who doesn't cross me. Alright, the next one, Arnie versus Flower. Clearly me. I threw Flower off a cliff. We don't know that she's dead. Oh
Starting point is 00:28:28 Top barley foot versus chunt Otak the owner of the vermilion minigame. I can't oh, that would be so sad. I would never hit him So I let him win. Alright Arnie versus chunt. I'd win Hands down chunt versus Yusudor Yusudor I Amstow shut versus use the door use it or Yeah, depending on my form. Oh, exactly. If I was a great blue tiger me of course Oh, what a battle that me also. I could never hit you so door Yeah, I would know I'd never do that you're my number one friend. You're my number one friend right to number one We did it. You're best friend as a memory
Starting point is 00:29:01 Oh, you should have had last you should have had last week's episode. It's wonderful. Anyway, speaking of the podcast, if you're listening, please give us some reviews on iTunes, give us some stars. We really appreciate it. If you want a magic tether in T-shirt, you can get, or use it or a T-shirt,
Starting point is 00:29:19 or a chunt t-shirt, you can get them at magictether.anobertees.com. Where can they get their, I fucked a memory gr, and T-shirt. That's not. I don't really have to go. He is on another fun fact about earning. Yes. He poop standing up on Earth too.
Starting point is 00:29:32 Oh, I knew it! One time on Earth! I knew it! One time on Earth. Ah, that's true. Is that like a power move? What is that? It's a standard.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Here's a fun story? None of this is real. The end. And I'm not saying that to hide some terrifying larger truth.
Starting point is 00:29:55 This is simply all made up and I think it would be lovely if you believed me when I said that. That's what friends do. Chunt the Talking Badger was played by Abel Rathai. Usador the Blue was played capably by Matt Young. The memory Gremlin pretending to be Arnie's wife, Sarah Marr, was played by Arnie's actual wife, Sarah Marr. That sort of weird, right?
Starting point is 00:30:16 Like they tricked us into all participating in some weird spice up your marriage thing. You can follow Sarah on Twitter at SmarRaja. Just start typing and see if you got it right. The brand new Chunch song was performed by Spence and Bret Hart, who are really just Meredith Steppian and Mark Swedersky. I'm not sure if I pronounced any of that correctly. Hello from the Magic Tavern is produced by Ryan DeGeorgi, Arnie, Neacamp, and Evan Jacover. By day, Arnie and Evan make video games like Vibbage and Dralphal in the Jackbox Party Pack, as well as the new game Quiplash.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Learn more about their games and how you can buy them at jackboxgames.com. All of these fictionalized pretendings were brought to you by Cards Against Humanity, with the help of the Chicago Podcast Cooperative. to you by Cards Against Humanity, with the help of the Chicago Podcast Cooperative. Learn more about Cards Against Humanity at Cards Against Humanity.com. And the Chicago Podcast Cooperative at ChicagoPodcastCoop.com. you

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