Hello From The Magic Tavern - Season 2, Ep 53 - Advanced Offices & Bosses

Episode Date: April 2, 2018

Metamore is back to help us play another game of Offices and Bosses…and share some news about the spin-off.CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungMetamore:Bill ArnettChest Trünkborn: Travis McElroyCraig: Ryan DiGiorgiProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Evan Jacover, Ryan DiGiorgiEditor: Garrett SchultzTheme Music: Andy PolandMagic Tavern Logo: Allard LabanAudio Assistance: Jason KnoxProduction Assistance: Garrett SchultzYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, a brilliant scholarship student attending Bishop Gray Academy, the country's most exclusive boarding school. Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Binge all 10 episodes of Academy, early, and ad-free on Wondering Plus. Since his death in 2009, the world has struggled with how Michael Jackson should be remembered, as the King of Pop, or as a monster. The new podcast Think Twice, Michael Jackson, offers a fresh perspective on the art and the artist, his life, his work, and his legacy. Listen to Think Twice, Michael Jackson, wherever you get your podcasts.

So everyone's still sleep up here, which is honestly kind of worrying? Although it has given me a lot of time to re-enact that scene from Risky Business. But anyway, the following podcast is not real. And while I've got you here, don't forget we've got a bunch of live shows coming up. Go to hellofromthemagictabroom.com for all that info. And now, enjoy the show! Hello from the Magic Tavern! A weekly podcast from the magical land of Foon. I'm your host Arne Eni Camp. If you've never listened to podcasts before, there's everything you need to know. About three years and four weeks ago, I fell through a dimensional portal. Behind a Burger King in Chicago into the magical

fantastical land of Foon. Luckily, I get a Wi-Fi signal from the Burger King through the dimensional rift, and I use that to upload a podcast. I record every week here in the tavern, the Vermilion Minotaur, and the Town of Hogsface, in the land of fune. And I'm joined, as always, by my co-hosts and good buds, and co-mayors of Hogsface, chump the talking badger.

Get wet. How you doing, bud? Doing well, how you doing? I'm doing okay You know really trying to be proactive Check off as many things off of our list of things we want to do this year and make hogs face better and safer Have you made any headway getting home? I have not made any headway getting home. Is it still a thing we're doing? It's it is on the list and here's a thing look

It might not be at the top of the list, but that doesn't like it is on the list. And here's the thing, look, it might not be at the top of the list, but that doesn't mean it's not the most important one. Yeah, it just feels like the pathway home goes through doing this podcast, finding Otock, defeating the dark lord, defeating the void. Am I sounding a little defensive? No, it's just it feels like you said you're being proactive, but then it's like there's a void destroying food and earth and we're just kind of sitting at a table. It doesn't feel proactive. We are not just...

Just connective? Connective? Is that word in food? It means lazy. I wonder if that's a word on earth. That's like, you know how you have connective tissue? That's lazy tissue. It means you're, you're limbs dead.

Oh, boy. Luckily this podcast never has any connective tissue. You got it. It's just one bullshit thing after another. I've been doing some home improvements. Oh really? You've been fixing up your hobble? Yep. Sproosin' it up a little DIY. Put in some bookshelves.

Why? Why do I want to make my hobble nicer? Yeah. I guess because Mayor Manana is staying with me. Oh, the mayor is staying with you. He's currently the has the sash, so he is the mayor. You know, I stayed with you for months and months and you never did anything to make the place look better. Yeah, and you're welcome for all that free room and board. That's true. Thank you. You saved my life. You're my first friend and

food and I really appreciate it. You're welcome, you're a friend. You know what? I'm also joined by our other co-host and co-mayor Sorry, sorry. I got here just in time. I've been very Unconnective this week and I went all the way to the tombs of flame Flame? Yes. The tombs of flame What's in the tombs of flame? Oh, what's in the tombs of flame? Oh, wouldn't you like to know? So I'll tell you, I found a grimoire there. Filled with ancient spells, which even now I'm beginning to susover and begin to decipher.

And one of these spells I believe may help us defeat the void. Oh, really? Yes, because when you need to defeat a great evil, you call upon Yusador, wizard of a twelfth realm of a feces master of light and shadow, manipulator of magical lights, devourer of chaos, champion of the great holes of Turokus, known to the elves as fiendy alec, known to the dwarves as Zodyn and Hukstein G's,

and known in an ortheist as guessing when he is Mastar. But, what about, made saw. What about... Yeah, what was the... Are there... Are there still secret names? Or did we find them all? But what? No, aren't you secret names?

What? Huh? I don't have any secret names. How am I know who? Who are you? Look, just between the three of us. Hmm. I'm not going to tell people that I have secret names anymore.

Smart. That's smart. Because that way they won't keep trying to guess them. I'm turning into frogs and their eyes fly out of the head and things like that. Great idea. The minute you tell somebody there's a secret, they start to try and suss it out.

They want to know it. They feel like they're running around. Guys, we are such constantly evolving dynamic characters. We are getting smarter and smarter. Learning life lessons and just growing and every three years we make a huge leap forward. I know. Don't fucking advertise your secret names all the time. That's the best way to make them secret. Yes, I'm not going to tell anyone, but I am going to leave little riddles all around Hawks face

about them. We need a lot more riddles on that show. Oh, they'll be indecisurable. Well guys, let's start knocking things off of our list for this year. We're already working to make Hogsface safer and defeat in the Dark Lord and all of that. You know what, something that we've ignored for a long time, almost as long as needing to go

and save Otock, the fact that you're trying to get home? That one though, we're always working on it. In tiny ways. I promise, I swear. We need to do season two of offices and bosses. Our beloved spin-off mini-series. Right. Oh, believe it when I see it.

We need to or we get to. We want to and we are doing. I do not believe this for one moment. Guys, let me introduce you back to this very table Metamorph the game master. Oh, man. I really bungered the office manager. That's fine. That's fine game nights Hey, everybody. Good to see you. Good to see you, Metamorph. Yeah, yeah How are you? It's nice to see everybody. Yeah, it's good to see you. Yeah, yeah, I'm Are you doing okay? Yeah, it's been a busy year and a half or so and

Spend a lot of time with a milk jug on my head. Oh, and Maybe we'll go into that some other time. Yeah, can we go into it now? Well, that feels like it could be a great surprise for office The boss is sure. Yeah, okay. Oh, well, okay. Metamorph, can I get you something to eat or something to drink perhaps? I've missed you. Oh, well thank you very much. Some, you know, rooster's feet would be great, you know. Rooster's feet, here I go!

So Metamorph for new listeners, you work in the stables. Working the stables, and when I'm not doing that, I'm usually hanging out here with my friends Back in the coin the dark corner playing role-playing games. Yeah, you play a very popular game called offices and bosses That's correct. That's correct. I mean idea is that rather than being boring old wizards and sorcerers and nights and whatnot Thank God you used the doors away from the table. Well with the phrase boring old wizards and whatnot. Thank God you used the doors away from the table. Well, with the phrase boring old wizards. Rather than playing mundane wizards and trolls and goblins,

in offices and bosses you get to be a regular human with no special powers, working in an office, trying to not get fired by the boss. Yeah, it still doesn't really connect with me. I don't get why you guys love this so much, just escapeism. I changed to get away from it. People get turned into stuff all the time in food. You know, turned into toads, turned into salamanders, turned into tadpoles, turned into frogs,

turned into a newt once. I got better. Here, here you are, Rooster Suite. Thank you. And they are having a special on potions that turn you into a tadpole. So I got one for everyone. Hey, yeah, you see now, in the world of offices and bosses,

you couldn't just turn someone into another creature. It's impossible. Well, not without a lot of surgeries. Yeah, yeah, and it is in the restrictions that we find freedom. Already, do you have surgeries on earth? Like cosmetic surgeries? Yeah, we do.

You know, people can try to make themselves look younger. Try? Yeah. So it's apparent they're not? I mean, it's apparent they're trying, maybe. What are some famous earth people who have had surgeries? My friend, Alruf Fy, had a lot of work done. Hmm, what kind of work?

Mostly on his dick, I don't know. Sounds like a cool dude. He would not stop talking about that. Sounds like a cool dude with the great dick. And that's just the God's honest truth. I wouldn't like make a joke like that because that's just like, crass and barely funny. Just the truth. As true is the fact that my wife only listened to Smashmouth.

Well, you know, the last time we played, Arnie, I think you did a good job. Your character died. Yes. Last time we played. But I thought you did all right. I mean, it was kind of interesting to kind of see the mundane world through your guys' eyes. Well, yes, but you didn't quite jump in feet first, as they say.

But you were a little tepid in your response. During the mini series, you played Orlando Bluma Maggleth and then before that, you played Ryan DeGeorgia with a son of the boss, which gave you many advantages. Yeah, and you three first names, Ryan D. Georgie. Yeah. You have a killer content. Really thought about that for a long time.

Well, I thought you did fine. I thought you, as a piece of me, we were thinking that maybe you were... Yeah, I thought you did fine too. Oh, thank you. Yeah. You were okay. But most importantly, did you have fun playing? You know what?

At first, I was hesitant about it, I guess, but I really did enjoy playing it. I enjoyed all the times we played it on the spin-off, and I'm so glad to have you back on the podcast. No, it's quite great to be in now that you guys are the mayors, I hope you can carve out some time to play some more. Oh, well, we are not the mayor this week. It's mayor Manana.

Mm-hmm. Oh, he's currently in green gables. Manana of green gables? Mm-hmm. Okay, well, I may have to go clean up the stable. Stables? Gables, green gables, okay. green stables. Oh, throw those away. Oh, I gotta get a mop if the stables are green.

Were you at the stables when Arnor cleaned the stables? Wasn't that one of his big feats? Oh, I was amazing feet. I was sick that day and Not gonna lie a piece of me felt like hey if you all thought the stables are dirty, you should have told me I mean don't Know that's interesting. They did it on your day off. Yeah, I feel like maybe he waited for when I wouldn't be there So would there would be a confrontation? Yeah, it's gotta be tough to have like a mythic figure in your world One of the most famous things about them is them doing your job which I do every day Mm-hmm, I don't get anything. I mean, it's not like you know

I'm supposed I don't get paid if I don't get anything. I mean, it's not like, I'm supposed, I don't get paid if I don't do it. So here comes this champion, this hero coming in and you tell everybody, love me because I cleaned the stables because no one else could. And like, dude, I do that all the time. Yeah, if you shovel shit, you're not a hero. Have you ever thought about getting in touch with your roots and perhaps burning up the filth in the stable

rather than just shoveling it out with a pitchfork? You know, I'm not gonna lie since we've chatted last. It'd come up that perhaps I might be dragon-borne. Yes. And I've been doing some more thinking about that. And I'm only able to burp fire. But I have not, I'm not one of the people who can just make those else burp.

Like that kid in school who could burp the alphabet. No. You don't know that kid who could burp the alphabet? I know what was his name. Vance McGee. I know Vance. Yeah, Vance, Vance McGee could burp the alphabet. Is he related to Swams McGee?

You know I'd be. Did we ever find Swamsimiki? Ah, okay, I'm gonna put that on our list. Find Swamsimiki. Also figure out if he's related to Vance Miki. I'm a man who's a fairly common surname in certain parts of food. Oh, okay, that sounds fantastic.

But I've been able to burp fire, but I have not been able to breathe it. I was talking with my mother. Just, just, well, yeah. She dismissed it immediately. No, I don't, I don't, I don't want to talk about him. I've never met my father. Oh, you don't know your father?

No, I don't know who my father is. Mom will not talk about my father. She also hates eggs. Never let that eggs in the house. And she walks with a limb. Oh. And she doesn't like sitting on round things. It doesn't come up very often,

but if there's ever a round thing, she won't sit on it. Give her a ukulele and she's a bag of quirks. Yeah, yeah. That is, you met her, I guess. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, if you give her a ukulele, she won't still sit on a square stool and just start.

You know, I'm gonna be honest though. I don't like sitting on round things either. It's not comfortable. Well, it can be if you sort of relax into it and let it coden me to it to go body. Hmm, some of those moves you made. Coden to it to your body. You should self-urniture. Ooh, I knew you thought about that being an ad man or a pitch person.

I might never have thought about that. What would that sound like? Would you like? Wait, wait, actually I about that being an ad man or a pitch person. I never have thought about that. What would that sound like? Would you like? Wait, wait, actually I do that all the time! I forgot! Buy a Caspa mattress. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha question about your mom, like how does she feel about your playing role playing games? Oh, she's just happy with it. She's happy to have the amount of the house to be pretty honest. Oh, sure. She has hinted that I might be a hundred years old. Over a hundred years old, which is kind of strange. We'll kind of hints this

you leave. We're kind of like she is very old A and B. She's like, you know, you've been living in this house for eight years. Oh, and you've been working in that stable for 20, so it'll do the math, you know? It's so hard to know if that's just the natural hyperbole of an overworked mother, you know, exactly, you know. And time is really hard to keep track of in this world sometimes. You at the top of the show,

you usually snumple over the years? Yeah, yeah, but for a good 90% of the year, I'm real vague about it. That's true. My mother hates barbecues. She hates cleaning fish, and she hates, hates, hates young beautiful maidens. Hmm.

I think she... She's dragon adverse. That's what everything's pointing towards. Yes, she hates YBMs. YBM. Young beautiful maidens. Yeah, not into young beautiful maidens. I think she maybe think she was one at one time. Oh, yeah. The hardest human her blood is boiling her brains YBM. Yeah, that's pretty much nails. Yeah. I hate taking Beams at the Y too. Now, myore, this is an issue I've taken up with many dragons and dragon board.

You said you had trouble breathing fire. Yeah, I've been... You can burp out fire. I have an accident burped out fire. It's somewhat an inaccurate term. When we talk about breathing fire, often we mean breathing out fire. Have you tried breathing in fire? No, no, I saw you were going with that.

I'm a big fire! I need a big fire over here. Oh, you said, oh, let's not kill another guest. Have you tried spitting fire? No, I haven't, you know, I've stood in front of the mirror and tried various things. You know, can I breathe fire? Can I, you know, a little bit able to burp it sometimes on accident? Can I see into the future?

Can I cast spells on people that make them do my bidding? You know, the answer's only like an auction. An auction, yeah. I've seen you said we're gonna do that before. We could have spell on someone and they'll go to an auction and do his bidding. Cause he's like, I don't wanna be at this fucking auction. I guess you should do.

Yeah. Yeah, stand there with that little ping pong paddle. He and the one like, what's that about? I don't know, where did that start? Do you have auctions on earth? Yeah. See, I don't know if you have auctions on earth and all, but like, what if you're auctioning off a ping pong paddle?

And then everyone in the crowd, why you a hold up, okay, put down your paddles. I get that you have them. But no one wants this one and everyone holds them up again. Like, guys, I'm trying to get rid of this one. Stop showing me yours. And then they'll probably be like, oh, wait a minute. Now I remember, this is part of the auction.

Minimor, that was more meta than I would look like. Here, here's a goblet. I lit a fire, and it's tried to breathe it in. Ah, okay. and it's tried to breathe it in. Ah, okay. Yeah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Now try to breathe it out. Did you snuff it out? Did you you put your hand over it when I wasn't looking is that no? No, no, you breathe the fire you breathe it in I don't I are within you Okay, do we have a spatoon? I don't know what I lied to me here. Just just do it right into my hat. Oh sure What's all this smoked in oh? Sorry kid use it all. Oh no.

He'll be fine. What should we start playing some offices? I don't know. I feel like the listeners want to learn a little bit more about cleaning stables before we really get to it. Cleanseable is boring. Yeah. And I'm ready to play.

In fact, I have some fun news. Maybe we could play around. Well, yeah. Where we're all bosses. What? Where I'll we're all bosses. What? Well, I'll get to be bosses. Normally, we're lowly employees inside the game of offices in bosses.

Yeah, I thought it'd be fun this time around if we could play something called advanced offices in bosses. Oh, is it the same Vance that you knew in school? Yeah, he actually could burp the alphabet and then became a a Vance, yeah, a creator of games. Oh, wow, which is quite nice. No discount. He doesn't remember me. I've sent him some Scrolls and things, but he's not that happens. Sure that happens. Well if I am to portray a boss

I must cast off my favorite and longest played character John Bastion. Wait, we have to play new characters? We can't just upgrade our old characters. In Advanced, OMB, A, OMB, everyone's a boss. New characters, yeah. Yeah, okay. We can roll them up. There's different classes you can be, there's different classes of boss

that you can be, and we've got some materials for everybody. And if you look those over, we can roll up some characters and play. Fuck yes, this is awesome. I'm excited to play like a boss. Mmm. Which shall be the name of my boss character. Oh, I must contemplate this and think of a name and throw myself into the character. Already I have three ideas. Let me run them by you, do your vote. Sure, yeah.

Magma, man. Okay. That's one shadow, you. Yeah. Yeah. Magma man. Okay. That's one shadow man. Hmm. Or Hugo. Huh. I don't know. I feel like those first couple ideas are real mega but I don't know if let's go with Hugo. Hugo? Great. Done. Done and done. Hugo boss. You know the first time I played I played the character Ryan to Georgie who was the son of a boss. So maybe I should play Ryan to Georgie's dad, I'll be daddy to Georgie. Sure, sure, okay. Okay.

And now, after some contemplation, I have come up with the fantastical name of Alex Baldwin. Well, that's great. We've got some wonderful bosses here. And all we need to do now is roll up some characters and pick our classes, there are different kinds of bosses that exist in the world. There's angry, yelling boss. There is, I'm in control of everything, but I'm really not boss. There is micromanage boss. And you can pick it.

The other different powers and different abilities. And maybe we'll get this thing rolling on the golf course. You know how? You know what, looking through this, I think I wanna be emotionally withholding so that your employees really want you to treat them like they're daddy boss. Okay, yeah.

It's gonna make having to fire anybody interesting. Yeah, and there will be lots of firings. Ooh, I'm really mad. I wanna be a fun boss. The kind of boss who like brings in a case of booze, and I'm like, let's drink it noon. Or I, you know, I'm just trying to stay hip to the news line. Yeah, yeah.

But actually, you're taking everyone away from their work. Mm-hmm. Indeed. I'm incompetent for sure, but I'm a fun boss. And I'm going to take the class of tantrum boss. I'm unpredictable and wild than I may turn on you in a moment's time, throwing little fits and tantrums like a little baby.

Oh, that's great. And if you can time those tantrums with the firings, that would really work in your favor. Yes. Yeah. You're gonna be a boss, baby? Oh, I get it. I really should've seen that. What do you mean?

I shouldn't have made that connection a long time ago. What connection? No, no, no. I don't want to talk about our stuff that I shouldn't know about anyway. Well, you know what? Let's take a quick break and roll up all the rest of the specifics of our characters and really dive into advanced offices and bosses. Alright, just like rolling up my character action, it's gotten me a little more excited

about playing offices and bosses. Metamorphose, I suppose, take it away into the world of advanced offices and bosses. Well, the first thing we need to do is everyone will pick one luxury item that they have with them at all times. And this luxury item will bestow certain powers upon them. And it is valued at least $500,000.

So even if you want to use some sheets sheets there is going to peel through that and look through. Could be an expensive watch. Could be an expensive set of golf clubs. Could be perhaps a keys to a very expensive car. But everyone has one obscene luxury item that they will begin the game with. I'm going to take the Toulouse Lutric piece.

Sure. So the painting? Pain Lutric piece. Sure. So the painting, yeah. Painting, small painting. Small, okay. That my pocket. A wallet size painting. Yeah. I'm going to take the watch.

Oh please, okay. I think that's the perfect thing for me to have. Gold. Diamond and Crested. Yes. Rolex watch. Very nice Rolex watch. Yeah.

I'm gonna take a statue of my son, Ryan DeGeorgie. Was that on the list? Oh, we had, it has to be on the list. Well, I guess there is exotic art. Oh, if you want to consider a statue for this on exotic, sure, why not? Yeah, why not? Why not?

Can I trade in, can I trade in my tool to trick painting for an elephant? Sure, I guess, exactly. It says an ivory on there, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I can just combine those two. Oh, can I trade in my statue of my eye for you on there. Yeah, I just combine those two. Oh, can I trade in my statue of my son for like a nice tie? Yeah, a $500,000 tie. Can I take that statue of his son?

Can I put that on my elephant? Sure. Thank you. Yeah, we haven't even started playing it. This is what I imagine bosses do. All the time, we're just swapping things that have tremendous value to everyone, but to them are just play things. I thought it would be who the fun boss, they have a gold statue of

Rhine to Georgie writing on the elephant. Oh sure. Well we'll open the game at the club on the golf course and you are approached, the three of you are approached by a fourth person whom you might recognize. I'm not sure maybe fun boss probably has the best chance of recognizing people. Hugo, yeah. Let's roll here as a 15. 15, all right.

Well, as the fun boss, you're gonna be more laps to recognize people. This is Dr. Farquhar. She's a lady here at the club, currently and kind of the grand dom of the country club. And she approaches the young's, oh, new boys need a fourth. We'd love to have a fourth. and kind of the grand dom of the country club. And she approaches Eonsah. New boys need a fourth.

We'd love to have a fourth. You said ours is that the voice you're gonna go with? Yes, that's the voice for Alex Baldwin. Oh wow. Is it Alex or Alec? Alex? Oh, Alec isn't a name. This couldn't...

Couldn't hear you if I were right. It's not being such a smart Alex. Alex like Alex Kazem. Do you know Alex Kazem? I don't think I do. Mrs. Farah Khwar is excited to play with you guys and says, have I ever make this interesting?

Oh. Well, I have an elephant with a golden rind to Georgie writing on top of it. So I think things are already a little interesting. Wow, that, I'm gonna roll for her on that one and she was pretty insulted by that. She was pretty insulted by that. I hate her a lot of ticket. A scratchy or a... Always a scratchy. Well, how... I'm smart.

I'm gonna roll for that again. Oh, scratchy, huh? How plebeian. Wow, what do you think I am? Look, I'm a fun boss. Look, look you three. There have been some word around the country club that someone or someone's have not been Mean to the staff. Oh, don't worry. I've been plenty mean to the staff. Oh, really? Yeah, is that true? Yeah Well, I'll leave the worst voice mail as you've ever heard in your life. Oh Really? Yeah, I don't care. I'll tell you what, I'm on the committee that makes sure that people are allowed to stay in the club and you all need to make one nasty voicemail to the maternity of the club and if you want to stay right now, I'll do it right now.

Oh wow. What if I, I can I use my cell phone here on the course? Yes you can, yeah. It's a good reception. I'm going to roll to see if I know how to dial the number. Yeah, yeah and if you don't, Dr. Farquhar, I'll tell you. I get an eight. You find the number. It's one of those where there's like, is it under Country Club or Golf Club, but you're not quite sure. But then you realize it's the same number under each entry on the phone.

All right. And I'm allowed to call it. As Angry Boss, you're already going to get a five bonus plus five on this roll. So wonderful. So you should be able to really insult that, uh, uh, made her date real well. Hey, dipshit. Why is it my car parked around front?

I said I was gonna come pick it up in 15 minutes. Yeah, I'm still in the course. I don't give a shit. Go get the car and pull it around. But I don't see it out there in 10 minutes. I'm gonna have your balls in a sack. And I'm gonna throw that sack in the ocean. And that ocean I'm gonna set on fire.

How was that? That was nice. It's gonna throw that sack in the ocean. In that ocean, I'm gonna sit on fire. How was that? That was nice, let's give it a roll there. Okay, that's a- That's 12. 12 plus 5, 17. Ooh, yeah, that's- Mr. Baldwin, I think you're definitely not the person who has not been rude to the server staff.

I think if anything, that was exceptionally rude. Oh, it hurts my heart a little bit to be so mean. I just don't know if I like playing a boss. It seemed to come to you so readily that... Hey, boss acting. Hey, don't mess with me, little shit. I'll dare you up to. See, I can do it, but it just doesn't feel right.

You're really good. You're really good. Am I? Yeah, you're right. I wonder, instead of chewing out a matrede, can I turn this into a power struggle between me and the doctor? You can certainly try. Is it like being a con artist where the greatest con is conning another con artist?

Like could I like, bossa boss? Your class again was um... Oh, with holding. Yeah. Yeah, that's tough to really be proactive. Isn't that the whole thing you're doing this year being proactive? I know I'm trying to be proactive. Yes, with holding, it seems like the natural choice for you though.

You can certainly try to figure a way out of this, or if Hugo Boss is ready to make a nasty phone call, who's ready to go next here. Maybe Hugo Boss should go. I feel like he's really good at being overpowering. Okay, he might as well call me out or reply because I'm gonna be the perfect dick. Uh-uh. Sean, I don as well call me out or a fight because I'm gonna be the perfect dick.

Chum, I don't know why you really lashed onto that story about a random person I mentioned from back on Earth. I know it's just a combination of consonants and vowels but collectively it just feels some sort of connection. As the cool boss just so you know there may be some negative modifiers because people don't always take you seriously as the cool boss. Gotcha. What's the major D's name? Brian. Who gives a shit? Hey, is this Brian?

Hey champ. Hey big guy. Nothing, nothing wrong. Just want to touch base with you. As creative, you know, we're chatting the other day and we thought that maybe you could do your job a little better. Not that you're not doing it great. Alright, how about you and I, maybe catch a flick sometime soon, you're the best, and I'll talk to you soon buddy.

Alright, bye-bye. Pretty good. You need a good roll for that one. You're gonna need a good roll for that one. That's a two. Wow. Maybe we found our softie. Wait a minute.

Were you born into being a boss or did you work your way up to it? Important to it. Where are you? No. Wow, wait. What? What? Nepotism.

OK, it better be a nepotism. Nepotism? It better be. It's nepotism for men. Nepotism. Yeah. I'm a doctor and a woman. I know about this thing. My nepotism for men, nepotism. Yeah. I'm a doctor and a woman. I know about this thing.

My nepotism has metastasized. Oh no. Are you gonna be all right, Hugo? Yeah. Why? What? What do you know? I don't know.

You don't know, Jack. Let's get this son of a bitch to the emergency room. It's really metastasized. We got to do something about it right now. Look, if somebody doesn't do something about it right now, I'll tear off your nipples and put them in the freezer. Oh, let's go. You used it, or?

You're just scaring me a little bit. What do you mean? I'm just playing my role. You ripping off nipples and ball sacks? I'm an unreasonable boss. That's my tantrum boss, that's my class. I'm just playing the role. It's fun.

Uh, well, Dr. Farquhar is like, uh, wow, wow, okay. Um, I'm gonna keep my eye on you. I'm gonna keep my eye on you, Hugo Boss. I'm gonna keep my eye on you. Just kidding. Fun Boss joke. Are you related to Lord Farquhar? Hmm? Shrek. I think you're it.

I think you're a fake body. You have conned your way into this, into this, uh, country of love. Do I have some sort of air about me that I would con someone? You do have a con air. Give me back the bunny. Wait, he's not really a boss.

He's some kind of undercover boss. Well, that's what Dr. Farquhar thinks. Oh. And, uh, if he loses boss status, it'll be very difficult to fire anybody. Oh, so we need to make sure he stays up there. That's helped me out. Well, I suppose we're working together as bosses, so, uh...

Daddy, did Georgie make that voicemail? Oh, okay, fine, fine, I'll do the vo- You know what, actually, could I see Brian in person? I feel like I don't even want to do a voicemail, like I want to be face to face when I really stick it into this Brian guy. Okay, uh, we're gonna roll for that, we'll see if I- Okay, uh, I got a 12? Okay, well, uh, Dr. Farquhawar says fine. If you want to do this thing's face to face, you can, but he better be crying when you're done.

Okay, great. All right. Are you a boss or are you? Oh, I am a boss. Are you? I am a boss. Are you? Yeah.

And she punches you in the shoulders with both of her fists. Oh, with both fists. Yeah. We heard to pull off. It's time to boss up. Okay. All right, all right. She snaps her fingers over her shoulder and somehow someone knows that means

bring Brian the Mater D forward. And here he is in front of you. He's confused, he's a little scared. He sees Alex Baldwin and is immediately, I pulled your car around. I mean, I pulled you, I pulled you, it's, you can actually see a good fucking thing. I put it in the handicapped spot so you can see it.

Uh, sorry, I won't happen again. Better not. Yeah, treat Mr. Baldwin with respect. I will, I will, yeah, I will. I don't like going to Yale so many, so yeah. So Brian, I wanted to talk to you. Sure, sure. Can we speak in private for a moment?

Because this is gonna be real bad. Yeah, we can head over to the ladies' tea. I don't know if you wanna, is that fine? Or, I guess so, sure. Okay, so, Brian. Uh-huh. I'm, I'm supposed to yell at you over here, but I'm gonna do a secret action. I roll for this, like to see if no one knows it.

Oh yeah, you gotta roll that one, yeah. I gotta, 15? That should be enough. You are, you do hide, you keep everything kind of hidden, so you would never be loud and demonstra- That's true. Anyway, even if you were really mad, you would always keep it kind of low-key, so that's going to be easy to hide stuff.

Brian, in order to keep my powers as a boss, I need to yell at you and make you feel terrible. But I don't want to do that because you remind me of my son, Brian. I'm going to adopt you and you're going to be Brian to Georgie. And, and I'm gonna be your daddy, daddy to Georgie. That's kind of weird. It's a little bit weird. What am I supposed to do? Just to hug you or you're gonna help me kill all these other bosses. Wow, for help really? Yeah, even your two friends.

Especially my two friends. You know, if you're me to just run off crying, I'll do it for 50 bucks. No, I want you to help me kill some people. Look, you're my son now. You're in this. Yeah, pop. Okay.

Yeah. It's just something I can do or you want me to put some poison in there on our paulmers or, uh, No, we don't poison in this family. That's the coward's way out. Okay. You want me to, uh, here's an axe. Ah, an axe? Mm-hmm. Uh, we're gonna to capitate everybody, but only bosses.

Okay, yeah, I mean, I've been wanting to do this my entire career at the country club. Thank you I've always wanted to have a son. You're gonna need a real high number to roll by the way. Oh really like you're like 19 or 20 oh 19 or 20 to get this guy to start going on an axe murdering spree. Oh, yeah That's could could you sit or a shot do a role to like help me out like kind of like give me a bonus? Why the hell would we help you out? Did you have any HM's on your sheet there, or any specialized ties?

Have this really nice tie. Any bonuses for that? Yeah, well, yeah, that is your one absurdly expensive item. And if you were to promise that to him, you won't have it for the rest of the game, but you're gonna use it this early, but that would be plus six right there.

So now we're talking 13 and North to get them to do this. So that's gonna help your odds quite a bit. Brian, Sun, I wanna give you this tie that I traded a statue of my other son for. Uh, the central elephant by the chance. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay, here, I'm gonna put this on you, and I'm gonna teach you how to tie it

Really mm-hmm. This goes over here and this goes around And this goes around through the bottom. Okay, this goes over there It's just a pull it down and it's not big well the back is supposed to be it's a twist Not a little bit. Okay. Yeah, the front is supposed to be a further than the back But this is close enough. It's just a double Windsor or a yes twist the rod a little bit. Okay, yeah, the front is supposed to be a further than the back, but, okay. No, close enough. Is this a double Windsor or a... Yes.

Wow. Exactly what that is. I'm not allowed to use that, not around the club. Well, you're not allowed to decapitate bosses either. It's your thing, Bob. You got that right. Yeah. Oh, okay.

So I have to roll a 13 or high? That's correct. Okay. I rolled 12 Wow I just killed one person Brian. Yeah, I'll help you Who do you want to kill that guy who yelled at me? What you'd like totally chewed me out Alex? Mr. Baldwin. Did you hear you hear for that? I was I was, yeah. He had to ring me out. He really did, and I had to go on. I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I had to go on, I've caddyed for him before. Oh yeah, he's just this angry grouch. Okay, well let's do this. All right. Okay. So how are you other bosses doing? Good, here's

the scratchy. No, thank you. Thank you. Now, I want to hand him a scratchy. Okay. Hand daddy. Hand daddy is scratchy. Sure, sure. I'd like to use my action manic episode. Uh, yeah, you can do that twice a day just so you know. Great. I'm doing alright. I guess I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by everything. You know, it's sort of a lot of pressure to, you know, uh, make the quarter deadlines and uh, hit all the projections. And you know, see this watch?

This watch is worse than your whole life. You don't have anything, you are nothing compared to me. There's first place and there's losing and that's it. I'm sorry, I'm really sorry about everything I said earlier. I'm so sorry, here's the keys to my car. And I wanna use the action to let my real age slip. Sure, sure. Oh, I haven't seen an outburst like that since World War I. What? Hugo.

You giving me your watch and your keys? No, just show me your watch. No, it's my fucking watch. Here are the keys. Okay. This watch is worth more than ten of you. Daddy to Georgie? Yeah? You want me to kill him? He just gave me the keys to his Ferrari. I just feel like somebody should get killed in this game. We could kill the elephant. Let's kill Hugo.

What the fuck kill the elephant? It's saying you ever had elephants there? Delicious. I'm gonna roll for your speech there. Wow, well, um, Brian still wants to kill you. Alex Baldwin. Yeah, that's understandable. All right. So Brian is coming at you with the X.

I don't really have any defenses here. I have a lot of aggressive attacks. Can I just push him down? I'll try to push him down. Sure, sure. It's going to be your strength roll against his strength roll. And as a blue collar employee, it's probably a little bit higher than yours.

All right. Here we go. Six. Okay, I'm gonna roll for Brian here. Ooh, that's a 18. Whoa. You try to push, I mean, he shoves you back and you stumble a little bit and fall down. And you're rotting some of the bitch.

How dare you touch this suit? This suit is where ten of these watches and this watches where ten of you. That's a hundred of you in this suit. My suit is where ten of these watches, and this watches where ten of you. That's a hundred of you in this suit. My daddy wants me to kill you. You're daddy. Who's your daddy? You know my daddy. You're looking at my daddy.

That's me, daddy. Daddy to Georgie. Turned on me. I'm sorry, I just, I'm just so used to fighting bosses. It's all I know in this game. And even when I am a boss, I gotta... It's real cutthroat. Yeah, it really is.

I've been trying to climb the way to the top of the corporate ladder. Am I close to a large body of water, like an ocean or sea at all? There is a water hazard nearby. I don't think that will work. I have this submarine I can get into sometimes. Yeah, yeah. That can be parked at the golf course as well in the water hazard.

I make a break and try to get to the submarine. Great, okay. Give me a roll here and see if you can make it. Ooh, three. Okay, you stumble in a bunker and you get sand on your face comically. Ridigulous, lots of sand on your face. Brian is behind you.

What are you all laughing at? It's so weird. John, when you used the door, I feel very sympathetic for him, like he's in danger, but as soon as he starts doing that, Alex Baldwin boys, I'm just like, yeah, you're just kind of checked out. Was that what you're saying?

No, this is the thing I was checked out. I was just saying my sympathy level goes away. Yeah, unless you're either the two of you are doing while this freak is breaking out. The minute I hear he has a submarine, I'm gonna try and sink it. So I'm gonna say 14. Sure, okay.

Well, you think it's battleship. Wait, that's my battleship. I have on my paper, I have a battleship. Well, it's now sunk. Why is that part here? It's a little bit there. Uh, at this point, uh, Dr. Farquhar is going to get security, but it may take several more melee rounds for the security door arrive.

Hmm. Alright, uh, I fallen down the sand trap. It's not much left for me to do. How about I grab a clump of the sand and I throw it to this face? You certainly can. You certainly can. you certainly can. Let's go to roll here for that. 17.

Yeah, it lands in his face, lands in his eyes. He is blinded temporarily. Oh no, it is just... Daddy, daddy, I can't see, daddy! Metamorph, is there any chance that this could have negative long-term effects on Brian, my new son? Oh, having sanded his eyes? Well, just like me, I guess, like... Manipulating him? Totally, totally dying somebody on the golf course.

I think so. I really think so. Oh, how a bad daddy. Maybe so. You may have a shot at redemption here, but it's gonna be tricky. I guess I gotta use all my powers as a boss to save my son.

Yeah, yeah, he's gonna be blinded for one more turn, so each of you will get a free action while he's, uh, both Ryan's blinded. But can I also call out to Hugo and see if he can join me and help me out? Certainly, yeah, yeah. Hugo, get your ass over here. I'm stuck in this sand trap, you fucking idiot! Uh, and I want Hugo to just take out his guitar and start to play. Sure, is there a song or a style of music you wanna? Whatever the kids are listening to.

God damn it, stop noodling and get over here! And I want to roll to see if Hugo can yell a phrase that's hip but also appropriate for the situation. Sure, sure. That's a three. You make it fool yourself. FOMO! No one knows what that means and everyone assumes that, oh, it's a poor attempt You make it fool yourself. FOMO! No one knows what that means. And everyone assumes that, oh, it's a poor attempt

at trying to sound cool. While Alex is distracted by Hugo, I'm gonna roll to see if I can get between Brian and Alex so I can kind of like shield him with my body. Sure, sure. With my big boss body. Yeah. I got a 12.

That's good enough. That's good. He's blinded so you can get between them. No problem. Okay. Yeah You're gonna have to get through this boss to get to Brian. I'm laying in a sand trap covering San look like an idiot You did this to me. Why'd you do this to me? I don't know. You see this watch. This watch is where ten of you Well, I'm also a boss. Okay. It's worth like five of you. No, you're not that much more with boss You know for Ari. What are a Ferrari, what are you driving? What are you driving? Look, I've just, I don't put my money into that. I just, uh, I'm not a car guy.

You're not a car guy. I just invest and I travel a lot. I like to put my money into experiences. Okay, this is an experience. Fuck and you. That's the experience I'm giving you right now. Fuck you. First of all, you don't put an end in between there.

That's grammatically incorrect. Well, he doesn't understand that. That's part of the character. Oh, I see. He's come, he's building stuff up from a lower status in life, and sometimes he says things that sound like they're insulting in smart, but they really are just a mess when you break them down. And then you realize the source of a lot of that anger is that Alex never learned how to read.

Exactly. That was heavy. Was that out loud or was that between just between? I think I say it out loud, but I use like, I don't say it in the third person. I say it in the second person. Like you never learned how to read. Yeah, so what? Still the most successful boss here.

My shits are 10 times better than you. My shits are 10 times better than you. Your shits are 10 times better than me? Yeah, my shits are 10 of you. I mean, can we roll for that? If you want to, we can. I don't want them to do this. Is there a way that I can sink their battle shits? You can try. I mean, it's a 14. To miss.

If you guys want to have some kind of... I'm gonna roll. I rolled number two. Wow, in this case, that's the best thing to do. I gotta leave the table for a little bit here, sir. I don't need anything, I just need to leave. Well, Alex Baldwin, that's the best thing to roll in this case. I'm not sure if you can beat that. Ooh, yes.

I seem to be out of options here, and this boss is towering over me, and his son has a battle axe, and I feel there's so, I may have met my end. Is there an action I could take that I'm missing here? I don't mind. Gosh, I feel sorry for you,

but also I'm kind of excited. Is this gonna be a game of offices and bosses where my character doesn't get horribly killed at the end? You do have one option left to you. Oh, and that is to play everything off as a big joke. And when bosses have their little pissing contests and are all angry at each other and yelling, they can just kind of start laughing.

And- Oh yes, I see that here. On the back of the sheet now. and are all angry at it, you're going to yelling. They can just kind of start laughing and... Oh yes, I see that here. Yeah. On the back of the sheet, not... Eh, eh. Ha ha ha ha! Ah, that was good. That was good, you got me.

Now let's get on the back nine and finish this day up. Alright, let's do it. Come on, let's go. Alright. On one condition. Yeah. Nothing happens to Brian. nothing happens to Brian. Nothing happens to Brian. Fine.

Wow, I feel like I could take that as some kind of victory. Yeah, nothing will happen to Brian. I slip Brian 500 dollars and I ask him to swing that axe right at Daddy to Georgie. Sure, I don't take a roll. 16, he takes the swing at you. What? Brian!

It hits you in the shoulder blade. Oh, right, where you got a double punched. Oh, Bruno! How many hit points do you have? You know, they come up so rarely. So rarely, but they're very important. Yeah, I have 13 hit points. Okay, the axe does 12 and a half.

What? Yeah. You are down on the mat there. This would be an opportunity. You could undo the embarrassment that was dealt you with a rubbing in his face moment here. Since you were cowed earlier, everyone at the club will then treat you, you think a negative modifier

is a dealing everyone at the club. If anyone would reverse I don't even think it negative modifiers are dealing with everyone at the club. If, anyway, all the way to reverse that now is to really rub it in his face. You piece of shit. How dare you. How dare you come at me and try to ruin my life? Because I am the greatest boss that ever, you see this watch here? This watch is where 20 of you. I'm worth 20 of you.

You're just a piece of shit and I turned your own son against you and he hit you with a battle axe. I kick him in the face. Sure, give me a roll there. 11. 11. Not bad, it mostly just gets turf up in his face. Okay. But you have regained all your privileges at the club, which is nice, which is nice, even though you were cout earlier. Now you are now seen as a real boss. I feel like mixed feelings about this. It doesn't feel like the great adventure trying to keep your job and fight for the side of goodness and prosperity, yeah.

I just feel so, I'm part of the problem. Yeah, and actually I didn't roll the damage on the grass clippings you, oh, yes. It's a three quarters of a hip-1 damage on the turf hitting your face. Oh, whoo. He goes saying that you're badly damaged, Daddy. The Georgie, he puts away his guitar, he's playing hip-cool new music that children would

recognize in a cool, fun way. And he wants to help Daddy. So he gives his elephant a whack on the butt to send the Ryan, the Georgie Gold statue over to help Daddy up. Sure, sure. Can I roll for that? Yeah. That's 19. 19.

The elephant makes it over to you. And even though you're technically dead, the visage of your son restores a half hit point to you. So you're now technically not dead. Also, if you hit zero hit points, you can use your golden parachute. Oh, you didn't know that? No, yes, if you get to zero,

you can hit your golden parachute and you're fine. You feel that? Oh, okay. You'll be fine. Well, I guess I'll do that. I don't really, I'm using a half a hit point now. Oh, I'll let you use your golden parachute if you like. Yeah.

You will immediately disappear and reappear at a condo in Miami Beach. Oh, okay. And you'll start adventuring there. Okay. Everything will be restored except for your necktie, which you did lose. But the golden parachute will get you to your condo in Miami Beach. Okay, well, I'm just excited that I survived one of these things.

No, that was a good round. You piece of shit. I think it's over. Oh, sorry. Hmm. You said, are you a peakhead of You pieces of shit! I think it's over. Oh, sorry. But... You said, aren't you weak and a peakhead or what it would be like if you ever turned evil? Oh no, not at all. For if a darkness did really overtake me, there would be such a brutal

and terrible rain of terror that did come down from the very skies as the birds and the rain and the fire that I would bring forth Great and havoc unlike it you have ever seen your hats on fire Oh, sorry kid use it on I'm moving out What oh move out. Oh, no The most beloved character on the podcast Oh no! Oh ffff! The most beloved character on the podcast!

Oh no! Kid use the doors, moving out! All that enough of this! Well, I've raised him to know everything that I know, so he should be just fun. Yeah, and I never really took about... ...six weeks! Well, Madame Morth, thank you so much for coming by and playing advanced offices and bosses with us.

Uh, yeah, yeah, it was fun to play and I haven't had a chance to play this much, but when everyone's a boss, you realize the enemy is your friend. Yeah, there's a lot of self-reflection that happens. And maybe your friend is your enemy, your enemy, when everyone's a boss, no one's a boss. Yeah, you know what?

I always assumed it would be easy to be a boss. It's not that easy being a boss. No, there's a lot of posturing and nonsense involved with it, but it seems very difficult to me. And you know what? I thought everyone knew Alex Kazem. But it turns out nobody does. I figured that you guys, since you're kind of the bosses of Hogsface now, you would probably...

Oh yeah, we are kind of boss-fogs. We should have played it like we've been running the town. We could have been open-hearted empathetic bosses trying to do some good. You probably lost. Oh we would have lost. Yeah. Well okay well I won't take that as a metaphor for how we should be running the town. And you would lost the game but you know it's not here. It's in this other fantastic world. It doesn't exist. Yeah. Well you know what? It's part of being proactive. We want to do season two of offices and bosses. So Metamorphore will you stick It's a fantastic world. Yeah. It doesn't exist. Well, you know what? It's part of being proactive. We want to do season two of offices and bosses.

So, Metamorph will you stick around and record a whole second season of offices and bosses with us? Uh, totally. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be great. Can I switch back to being John Bastion? I think that's probably a good idea. Good.

Yeah, can we play something that makes us just as sort of powerless as we normally are? Yeah. We can do that. We can do that. Uh, and maybe, uh, nothing is going to be a nice to have a fourth. I don't know are. Yeah, we can do that. We can do that, yeah. And maybe I don't know if it is any, we can I still have a fourth? I don't know if you guys, oh yeah, we could pull some people in.

I think I saw Clax was hanging out or we could probably have Clax on. Sure, yeah, that'd be great. That'd be great. There's a new expansion for OMB where everyone plays as though they have no job. You start unemployed. Oh.

Mm-hmm. And maybe we could roll up some unemployed characters and start from there. That would be fun. I would find it. All right, great. Well, you know what? I think this is a good time to say that offices and bosses

season two is coming out very soon. It's going to debut on Stitcher Premium April 4th. That's so exciting. Yeah, if people listen to this episode the day it comes out, that's like only two days away. And if they listen to it the day after it comes out, it's one day away. And if they listen to it the following day, it's the same day. Wow.

All of season one of offices and buses is already on St.Premium. And now season two is going to start coming out with a new episode every week. If they listen to this episode the day after, can they go back and listen still? Or is it gone forever? It's there permanently, or at least as permanent as any kind of digital media is. They listen to it two days after it comes out, will they still be able to listen to the mini-series? You said, or you know, I can't do math.

I'll take that as a yes. You know what, we enjoyed doing the first season of offices and bosses so much. We're excited to finally do offices and bosses season two. We're gonna have really great guests like Clacks, the Skeleton, Cloddy of the Witch, Momo of the Mouse, and so many more. And so many more chest. Do you want to do it? Me? Oh shit, yeah, I love to. I love offices and bosses. Sounds like he does. Sounds like? Oh, and you know what, let's make season two at least a couple episodes longer than last season. So 40? We're gonna be proactive. We're not gonna season two at least a couple episodes longer than last season. So 40?

What? We're gonna be proactive, we're not gonna be crazy. How many do you be do last season? I don't remember. And those are lost forever. No, season one is already on Stitcher Premium. It's been playing right now. It's literally playing there right now.

Oh my gosh. Also, you can listen to all of hello from the Magic Tavern without the commercials. But I spent so much time on those commercials. How much does this cost a month? 20 gold pieces, 30? I'll pay you 40 right now. You said, or would you be surprised to learn?

I don't have the information about how much it costs in front of me. Not at all. But what I do have is that if you go to stichurpremium.com slash magic and use promo code magic, you get a free month of stichur. And that's more than enough time to catch up on season one of offices

and bosses and listen to a couple of episodes of season two. What are EPS? It's your hand for episodes. Oh, my. So take a month to listen to stitcher premium, listen to a bunch of offices and bosses, listen to a bunch of other stuff, all the great stuff from Hal is also available on stitcher Premium now. And a bunch more. You're gonna like the way you listen, like you're into you. And if you decide you wanna keep your Stitcher Premium subscription, if you use the promo code Magic,

a little bit of that goes to help supporting. Hello from the Magic Tavern and helping us defeat the Void. I also need to help ping rent. Also, it helps Chunt fix up his nasty hovel. Not nasty. Oh, Chunt, you nasty. Nasty boy. Get with it.

Man, I'm sorry, just at the end of that game, I just really put on the hard sell. Instead of spending more time catching up with you. Uh, that's fine. I don't understand any of the things you said. Or why you said them. But if you feel they're important, well then... That's fine. Oh, but what are going to have so much fun playing this new module in offices and bosses? I can't wait.

I'm so excited about it. And you should come back sometime, and perhaps bring your mother with you. Yeah, maybe so. Maybe so. We'll have to make sure she has something squared. Is it on? Not you, Chess.

Yeah, not unless you want to get me. Sounds great. Any y'all need your horses saddled or anything before I go or... I'm good. Oh no, magical. I'm fine. I have a horse. I don't want to have a question for you.

All these booklets and pamphlets and all this stuff for offices and bosses. Is it expensive? You know, it is, but I don't really spend money on anything else. Oh, no clothes, no decorations on my walls or anything. Yeah. No significant other in my life, other than office managing pretty much. I see.

Why are you wear that saddle that you obviously stole from the stable? Is it that obvious? I already have a question for you. Speaking of saddles, tell me more about saddle reply. Well, he's a great guy. Was it saddle? Yeah, that was right, saddle-refi.

Sounds like a cowboy. He was kind of a cowboy. He was, is he dead? I mean, he probably is by now. But you know what, saddle-refi, if you're out there and listening, please email me. I hope you're doing OK, and I miss you. Thanks, sweet.

Yeah. Thank you for talking about earth-a-tuff. No problem. Hey, offices and bosses is back. That's fun. I've got a sneak peek actually of the new season I'll play for you here in just a second, but first, the credits. Usador the Blue was played by Matt Young.

Chant the shape shifter was played by Adelre Fy. Metamorph of the office manager was played by Bill Arnett. Check out his book, The Complete Improvisor, available on Amazon and more, and more importantly, check him out on Offices and Bosses Season 2, which they've used this Wednesday April 4th only on Stitcher Premium. For a free month of Stitcher Premium, go to Stitcher Premium.com-magic and use promo code Magic. You can listen to all of season one of offices and bosses, get started on season two, and help support the podcast. And there's also just a lot of other

great stuff on Stitcher Premium too that you're going to want to hear. Tell you what, here's a sneak peek at the episode coming out on Wednesday on Stitcher Premium with special guest TJ Jagadowski as Clacks the Skeleton. Clacks, do you know Metamord? He's been in our running our game. No, no, hey, our office manager. You're a skeleton, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What gave it away? I don't want to say anything, but maybe you're just what you did immediately.

It's like, I don't want to ask someone if they're pregnant, you're like, I am like 90% sure this person's a skeleton, but just in case. Just in case they could just be very desiccated. Yes. Which, you know what? You see that around here. You do, and it's like how much flesh remains before they're no longer a skeleton. That's a good question.

Mostly skeletal? Oh, you gotta get it all off to qualify. Oh, there we go. There we go. Zero. Oh, gotta get off. I mean, two other O and B groups, but I'm pretty sure I can commit to this one. Oh, this would be, zero. Oh, gotta get off. I mean, two other O and B groups, but I'm pretty sure I can commit to this one.

Oh, this would be a third. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And one, I'm the head East Coast head of acquisitions. And in another one, I'm a mischievous mail remorquer. Oh, fun. Yeah. What makes you mischievous?

Oh, I miss a delivering mail, putting stuff in mail, and I'm low set. We're supposed to be there. No, I've been like, putting purpose. Yeah, that's fun because you can intercept really important puzzles of mail that can give you new information and new abilities. Yeah, we're just putting yeast in an envelope.

And so they still get the message, but they're like, wow, this is weird. This is weird. This smells weird. Yeah, the mail room clerks get a lot of great bonuses when it comes to gathering information and learning about what's going on in the office. So that's the-

And they each get a knife. I love that they you get to carry a knife. A letter of dagger. A letter opener. Small dagger. Oh, you got the unemployed? This is the unemployed one? Yeah, we're gonna play unemployed.

Oh great, I'm gonna be a junkie trying to get back on his feet. Oh, oh, he's ready to go. Perfect, I already got my class picked out. Oh man, I'm gonna be a junkie trying to get back on his feet. Oh my god, he's ready to go! Perfect, I already have my class picked out. Oh man, I can't wait. Get a free month of Stitcher Premium at Stitcher Premium.com slash magic and use the Bromot code magic. Oh, and if you want even more offices and bosses and you live near LA, don't forget the upcoming live offices and bosses show in LA April 22nd.

You can get info and ticket links for that show and the upcoming one in Indianapolis and our QA at C2E2 by going to hello from themagictabrin.com and clicking on the live shows tab. Hello from the Magic Tabrin was produced by our Neenie Camp, Averjikovar and Rihandie Georgi, this one edited by Garrett Schultz. Music by Andy Poland, Logo by Aller Lebon, additional audio effects by Jason Knox, production assistants by Garrett Schultz. I forgot something very important last week and that is to give a huge shout out to Joe Cabrera. He's been a huge contributor to our official Wiki at MagicTabron.Wiki.com.

We couldn't do it without him. Thank you so much, Joe. Visit us at alertforthumagictavern.com or on Facebook or Twitter, thanks for this Kago podcast, co-op, and thanks to your wolf. go up and thanks to Earwolf.