Hello From The Magic Tavern - Season 4, Ep 24 - Dripfang, Savior of Foon

Episode Date: April 25, 2022

An odd new tavern-goer visits. Could he secretly be Dripfang the Necromancer? Yes.CreditsArnie: Arnie NiekampChunt: Adal RifaiUsidore: Matt YoungDripfang: Kevin ScirettaMysterious Man: Tim SniffenProducers: Arnie Niekamp, Matt Young, and Adal RifaiPost-Production Coordination: Garrett SchultzEditor: Anna HavermannMagic Tavern Logo: Allard LabanTheme Music: Andy PolandYou can support the show directly and receive bonus episodes and rewards by joining our Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/magictavern for only $5 per month. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram, and now Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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People live earth, the following podcast is not real. Now you might be thinking, okay, my friends have been yammering about podcasts for quite some time, and I've finally gone and downloaded one, but what do I do with the damn thing? Well really you just play it while you listen, and marvel to yourself about how tricky humor can be to navigate, and how difficult it is to witness people attempting listen, and marvel to yourself about how tricky humor can be to navigate, and how difficult it is to witness people attempting it, and then falling short thanks to personal failing set in motion years earlier. You can also knit.

One of my favorite things to do while listening is to have my angry letter all written out, with some key details missing that I can fill in when I pinpoint exactly how the episode is disappointed me this time. Now you know just how to interact with your new audio recording, and can participate in the current fad until you abandon it in favor of whatever's next. Some sort of Hunger Games situation? I wouldn't rule it out! Until then, sit back and enjoy the show. Attention if I can have everyone's attention please. Patrons of the Strange Familiar, ha ha, it's me, the little scamp, chants, being bon, get wet, uh, bloodfarts. My friend, that you

all know, the loudest son of a bitch I ever met, Yusidor, has gone the way of the dodo. The way of A dodo. You remember that dodo. Oh, the way of A dodo. Remember that dodo died? There's still plenty of dodos left in Foon, but that one dodo died. And Isisador, my friend, went the way of that one dodo. I think his name was, I'm gonna say Ricky. But listen, this is not about Ricky. This is about Isisador.

Raise your glasses, raise your cups, raise them high and drink them dry. To Isisador the blue, the best friend, I'm sorry, I didn't think I'd cry at this wake. The best friend that, John, hey, I'm waking here, I'm waking here. I'm so sorry to interrupt, maybe this is a bad time. This is when we usually record the podcast.

Oh, this is a bad time. What podcast is that? Hello from the Magic Tavern, the podcast that we've been together. Oh yes, yes, I'm sorry. I started that new podcast with pk1 You're pinky. Yeah, I thought it was that and I also do get nuts. I just I'm sorry. You got a lot of podcasts I'm straight. I feel like I feel vocally like pulled taffy. I feel like I have too much going on Yeah, I agree. I think I do Hey, should we start a podcast about when we say before you should oh, we'll get to it

Calm down that old married couple all they do is fuck and scream. Yeah, they're not Yeah, we know we can see you we can see you that's disrespectful very disrespectful Well, but yeah, I guess he has his staff out get your staffs out for you, so door Those who want to Get your staffs out for you, Sador. Those who want to. Get your staffs out. Um, Ernie, what if we did a podcast about me talking about how I'm a little spread thin? Ah, I feel like that would be counterproductive to your problem.

Counterproductive. Okay, what does that mean? Let's take it apart. Counter, of course, means over the counter or countertop, much like a bar top. Productive means to get shit done. So you're talking about getting shit done on the bar top? Okay, let's move our equipment over to the bar.

Okay, sorry everyone, keep waking, keep waking. Yeah, yeah, you snore, we really miss them. Down the hatchy old snatch, down the hatchy old snatch. Professor scrambles, here boy, here Professor scrambles. No, don't hump my leg. No, heuh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, b, no, b, no, Hello from the Magic Tavern! A weekly podcast from the magical land of fun. I'm your host Arneini Camp. If you've never listened to the podcast before, this is everything you need to know. Seven years, one month and three weeks ago, I fell through a dimensional portal behind a Burger King in Chicago into the magical, fantastical land of fun.

Luckily, I'm still getting a Wi-Fi signal from the Burger King through the dimensional rift, and I used that to upload a podcast recorded here in the tavern, the strange familiar in the town of nibble bottom, at the base of Mount Slobodan. Slobodan, for some reason I can never remember that name. Well, here's what, remember the business we were gonna start, we're gonna call it slope on down, slope it on. Just remember slope on down.

Couldn't be easier to remember that. You know, like those advertisements when the guys, like, went to you to go skiing and you'll slope on down. Yeah, you know. I'm gonna block down, slope on down the road. Ruh, ruh, ruh. Ugh, I hate that Professor Stamples

keeps sitting at the piano, sinking little songs. Ruh, and I am joined, I guess not as always. I'm joined as always by one of my co-hosts, but also my new co-hosts. But first, my old, old co-host, Chant the Talking Badger. That could have been more clear. Oh, yeah, baby. And my new co-host, he's a talking dog, who's a good boy?

Who's a good boy? And is definitely not you, S to or pretending to be a dog, so no one realizes he's still alive. Professor Scramble's. Berk, Berk, I saw the crime. You saw, what crime did you saw? Berk, well someone stole all the spoons. Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk.

Are you sure they're not just an dishwasher? Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk, Berk. Boy, is that where you found them? Wait, I'm trying to figure out just bullshit. Is that where you found them in the dishwasher? Yep, that chunt. Boys, that where you found him? Wait, I'm trying to figure out your bullshit. Is that where you found him in the dishwasher? Yep, that's where I found him. Even solve a crime as whole.

I arrested the dishwasher. You took someone's job and you arrested him? That's right. Uh, chunt, are we sure? Are we absolutely sure this is Yusidor? Magic dimself into a dog and this isn't just a real dumb dog? I'm pretty sure, I think it's in the eyes. Right, the eyes? right? The eyes?

I guess so. Seems dumb. And the dog has three buttolls. I'll have to take your word for it. Oh, yeah, I got an extra one. Hey, hey, Professor Scrambles, say the catchphrase, say, only you can prevent drugs. Only you can prevent drugs.

Oh, I love that. We gotta get some merch going. We gotta get some merch going. Yeah, because Professor Scramble's is gonna be around four years and four years. Yeah, it's not gonna be one of those regrettable purchases where you're like, I bought an oven mitt with Professor Scramble's and now he's gone.

No, this will be long-term merch. Everyone will know what's going on. Everyone recognizes him. Even a silhouette is recognizable. Oh yeah, he's a dog. Even a silhouette is recognizable. Oh yeah. He's a dog. And what's a dog? Yeah, he's a dog who looks like two kids in an overcoat.

Oh, I also want to introduce how it wouldn't go so far as to say co-host. But just sort of sitting in, in this jar is my disembodied pinky, PK1. Although I think PK1 isn't doing so great since Lady Comfort food broke up with him and he found the slip of paper. And I think he decided to take on a new identity. And Arnie, this is how we're opening when you literally just said, if this is your first time listening. Mm-hmm.

Is this too much for first time listeners? Yeah, can you imagine trying to parse that sense if you've never heard this show before? Let's be honest, when I say for first time listeners, uh, that's a joke. It's a joke. There's a joke in me. Yeah, no, it's just a rapidly dwindling group of people that have hung on from some other time. Already, do you mind, and I hate to put you on a spot, but I will, because it's awake,

do you mind redoing the intro and really laying on that thick, thick sarcasm when you say for first time listeners? Okay, sure. Hello from the Magic Tavern. A weekly podcast from the magical land of fune. I'm your host, Rady Camp. For first-time listeners. Uh, yeah. We know you. Oh, good boy, good boy.

Excuse me, boy, I'm coming for you. Oh. One side, please. Card me, Governor. Oh, big in your party, my lady. Oh Wow that guy is saying all of that behind one person just go around him Yes, it's rare to get someone so cut me already if I look at him, you'll see, well, you'll see what you see. Oh, one's got the other idea, well, the other has a different thing altogether.

But, oh, oh, oh, oh, these bounds get me where's our needs to be. Uh, do li-boop, but these do li-boop, but do- Arnie, hello? Hello? Arnie, this guy seems so fucking weird. Let's interview him. Do we have a guest today? Uh, no, I mean, I was just gonna talk to PK1,

but I can put the lid back on PK1. Pardon me, Tavineke. If I could trouble you currently for a bit of the old ale and a drama the old wine from drinking to a dude, good or a day, and a day good or a do. And I wanna make sure,

or tease me, do diligence proper. Pardon me Jens, is this seat next to this dog taken? No, it's not and can I just salute you for it's rare to see someone come into a bar and set sail. Arnie set sail is what we call it when you order some spirits and some ale. The portman too called sail so to set sail is to really fuck up your night or day. Sayal. Thank you. By combining two different types of booze. Oh well I'll tell you truthly, Jans, if you don't mind a stranger who's never met you before,

bending your ear about something a little bit on the ear. It a customer I'm from to literally bend the year when you bend the year and so allow me to take a knee just give me a knee just give it just give it just give it it just okay while I say this to you okay we're looking right your eyes that's close as possible okay friend this guy's all here we're drinking for a very special but somber occasion and I've released the knee. Oh, thank you so much. Yes, speaking of knee, this is my friend R-N-E-N-E camp. Yeah, you can call me Nini. You're right, we are mourning the loss of our good friend, the loudest son of a bitch I ever did meet.

You should have the blue. Did you know him? Oh, who hadn't heard the name of yeh okay oh are you that's oh mate bit of a frog and me for oh like a snake yeah he's going for fanzi trying to say I'm sorry oh no oh good man which I am and firm in the cause of righteousness Then he doesn't have polygyz for however if I was a dastardly boy, which I'm not I would never be able to say the name of the one

We're old here to memorialize you Oh Friend please take a seat, you're dirty. Please, you're dirty. Call me, friend, call me Family Member Number 7. That's me nine. That's your name. That's my name.

Ask me about it. Ask me in great detail about my nine. Family Member Number 7. How did you get your name? I was a seventh person born in me family. Shecks out. So are you Family Member Number seven or family number member seven? What the fuck what the fuck would you even say that for?

Yeah, I see that's the question you would ask a stranger after they give you okay, you know, it's fucking high It's the drip thing nice life to throw to the judge Everybody be fucking real fucking cool. I tend to be a cockney weirdo to get into this bar without getting my fucking head chopped off. Already quick, and it's gonna hit me some sunglasses in a cigarette. Don't you dare, I will know it's you. That's okay.

Also, how did you not, okay, knife gently away from the throat for just a moment. Now, how did you not know it was me because it's just me with shorter hair and I literally had sunglasses on. Well, if I'm being honest, it's because you're wearing a shirt that says not suspicious. And I, yeah, I wanna had sunglasses on. Well, if I'm being honest, it's because you're wearing a shirt that says not suspicious. And I...

Yeah, I want to be so trusting. Gosh, it's just... This is the armor against just the most stupid possible. Anyway, knife-back to the trench throat. Now, her! Everybody's gonna be real fucking cool in killing that dog. I don't know who that dog is, but I'm not down with him, not one bit. You know the fuck it's have made my life hell.

So, I'm going to ask you once and once only, where's Yusidor? Oh, Drifeng. Where is Yusidor? Tell me where he is. Tell me where he is or I killed the beaver. I killed the beaver, Dad. Oh, humble brag.

I stabbed this beaver right in his fucking neck. Oh, I will stab, I will gut this beaver in front of everybody. This beaver chunch that you all know. Drifeng, Drifeng, I'll look. What? First of all, you know, I hate you. of all you know I hate you I hate you too Fuck you right in the face Where's you to do it? No fuck you in the face as well. No fuck you in the face

I'll fuck this beaver with a knife listen to what you just made me say I'm the bad guy And I realized that that was the most horrible things that on this podcast well We take that again. I want to take that again. I feel bad about what I said and I'm evil I'm evil every every look at me Hey, everybody gather around. Did you hear what I just said? I said I would I can't say it again. I really can't Hmm sunglasses. He's trying to find it's me family member number seven TNT idly winks up. She man. Just down. Jibair This may, family member number seven. Tien, Tiddly, Wink, Sub, Shaman, J-Down, J-Bair. Triffin.

Oh good, everybody's looking away. Sunglasses off, knife back to the chest. Ah, I should have moved. I will stab your beaver best friend if you don't fucking tell me where Yusudor is right now. Triffin, Yusudor accomplishes true purpose. He was transported into a shaft of light or some other phallic shape and he shot into the sky and he is Really and truly gone. It's not a con or a fake out or a mid-season

Plot twist that doesn't really mean anything. It's usurors dead You real Z's okay. Thank sorry. I mean interrupt your adolescent add-on You mean to step on. Okay, thank you. Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your adolescent add-on. You mean to step on my for realsies? You mean to tell me realsies? Oh, hey, I'm waking here. I should have tried this to have you, but I already did, so that would be repetitive.

You mean to tell me that you launched an independent venture in which big moments would be needed, which all you would, all your forces, everything you've marshaled would be, you'd be, you'd be possibly full strength and it's without your most powerful, most respected member. And you know how much that fucking kills me to say? Because he was my arch nemesis. I never told him this in real life, because it's a high-scompliment that a villain can give a do-goodter

to look in right in the angle, you're my arch nemesis. I would spit on you at your own funeral, but I would also know that you deserved my spittle. You're telling me he's actually truly unstephone no longer with us. Professor Scramble, stop wagging your tail. He wagging his tail so hard. So hard and happy, I don't know.

Not gonna. Happy it's God damn dog I've ever seen. Look at him. I'm about to stab this beaver thing. What's white? Once you do it, I'll solve the crime. What the fuck, Scramble? He said, wait, hold on, this dog solved crimes?

No, I think he's being sarcastic because if you watch you stab me, he, he solves easy crimes. It's not even he solves them. He sees something and he says something. Okay, well that's just good civic policy. That's right. Hear me out. A new t-shirt with Professor Scramble's with his sunglasses at the edge of his nose and it just says, easy crimes.

Are you having a merch meeting right now? I'm going to kill this guy guy. No Arnie, Arnie, what we do is we get a hoodie. It's professor scambles, but it's saying fucking be I can call in a beaver the whole time I know he's a badger I'm trying to piss him off. Instead of saying Bar far he says Nark Nark. Is that something? Not something. Sorry, I pardon the knife I'm just going to grab my notepad here. Yes, okay, so what are some other merch ideas for this season? You are so into writing that down. Hold it up your jacket.

You actually like everyone in that type would watch you bleed out, and you're taking notes. You know what, I like to leave her badger. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I gotta say, and again, like I said, I hate you. You don't look good.

You look like you've had a rough year to a half year. What's going on, man? Thanks. Anytime a person is at their lowest, you always want to tell them that they look it. That's usually the most comforting thing you could say to anybody, but adversarially, excellent move. Yeah, oh yeah, you look tired.

Yeah, and also not only tired, you look like, oh, Arnie, what's like a creature here that I can compare him to that will not be flattering, like a celebrity troll or something? Yeah, take it time. Cause that's always fun, right? Or is Hilton? Oh, you look like David reference.

Yeah, it's always fun when someone compares you to a celebrity you don't want to look like. I think that's just a really cool thing to do. Oh, anytime anybody can go up to you and say, you know who you look like and take that big swing and assume that it's a celebrity you either find attractive or you assume is a good person. That's probably the best thing you can do

in a social situation. At least I'm still sarcastic. Barkeep, when I said beer in a little bit of wine, what I meant was just take that whole, just pour it all into a flag and keep pouring until I'm no longer alive. Yeah, Anvark, it's been a real shit fuck of a dick fight. Demon of Lamoncha, that's who you look like.

Dihuma, na Huma? The demon of Lamoncha? Aren't... Wow. You have no idea how awful that is because you have no idea the actual history between me and the demon of Lamoncha. Because it's over. I had story time.

Yeah, okay. Well, he's dead for one. I had to kill a demon and he was the last person I killed before I got to this town. Yeah, I need way more of that alcohol and I need more alcohol put in. Just make it me a cocktail of every, give me a suicide of anything that you think would just turn out the lights and our embark is paying for it.

Yeah, I killed the, what did you call them? The demon man of the deep, the debag of Lamontia. That's what I'm gonna call. Anyway, the debag of Lamontia is dead. I've been okay, so last time, okay, let's do a little recap. For those of you listening for the first time. Nice.

The last time that I saw you straight back to Fucco's was on, was at the volcano, right? We were all chillin' on the volcano, black spire. When we kind of conclusively defeated you, killed the Dark Lord. You killed my boss. You killed the Dark Lord. You destroyed the entire reason I had been.

And it really, it really showed me up. I'm not gonna lie. It was bad. I didn't rejoin the rest of the villains. I didn't get in our escape caravan and sail away. Soul walker went one way, Baron ran another, but it just fucked off and did their own thing. I just kind of wandered around dragging the sword

that killed my boss, which I still have with me. There it is. What's he gonna do? Wow. And just kind of wandered until I found a boat and I sailed back, sailed away. And I've just been going from evil job to evil job for the past year,

just kind of more killing time than trying to do anything. Just because, it really messes you up when the person that you've been trying to, you serve all of reality with, turns into a shaft and a column of light and sword that you forged to kill another wizard is the thing that you was used to kill that person. Thank you very much for this drink. Well, he drinks that. We're going to take a quick break and we'll be right back with drip thing and some more empty threats right after this.

And it's that song that fucking song absolutely fucked my entire life. What happens there? Out of nowhere where I started hearing barred singing songs about how you were the one that killed the dark Lord. Right. I mean, I was going from evil job to evil job, just kind of footloosen around. I was really trying to save my Kevin.

Yeah, footloosen around. Yeah, yeah, real footloosen around. Chant you footloosen around? Uh, not necessarily. Fuck you buddy. Anyway, so, so, the everybody... The chon, everybody chon. The dog having a opinion on this.

Merr-merr. Great addition. So, there I was in the middle of, I'm not west somewhere. And I hear this big to-do in one of the local saloons. And it looked through, and they're singing a song about how I am the savior of fune, how you know, how this cool, renegade anti-hero and just like that's fine, I'm cool part, great that I appear to all genders in a sexual basis like happy days, but I don't know if I've heard it, but it's also factual. Listen to the lyrics man, it's in there, now everybody thinks of a hero including the fucking villains that I used to work with

So now everywhere I go if there's an evil doer if you're profited by the dark lord if you fucking works for my point My ass is grass brother. I've had to kill so many evil people that now people think I'm good Yes, every time I go to there's the villain and they try to ace me and then when I kill them the townspeople are like He's freed us from the bonds of the demon of lemon. Sure. Let us all celebrate him and then I just get more publicity The song is actually turned me into doing good even though I'm just trying to save my own ass And that's why I came here. It's gonna kill you so to refer everybody to prove that I was still number one evil guy That I was the best that was the bad does I refer to everybody to prove that I was still number one evil guy.

That I was the best, that I was the bad, that I'm a snake man with a big wizard killing swords. They still got a city in there. With a city in sword, maybe keep that away from the dog, just because it's a wizard killing sword. I mean, it will kill, it will kill. It will kill anything. It will kill me.

It's basically killed me. Well, yeah. I hate you for that. It didn't stick it in you. It does talk to me now. It does. It whispers. Did you know?

Yeah, did it whisper to you? That sounds careless. Yeah, it asks for blood constantly. It's just blood and soul, blood and souls. It's really just, I don't know. It's really, it's, it's, it's, it's, call is more persistent. Every day, then, next, I'm gonna put it back in the scabbard.

But the thing, the thing is like, now, even though I'm doing bad things like killing people. I'm being rewarded and people telling me that I'm doing good And I was gonna kill you so the one far very very proved that I wasn't good That I'm still me them still dreadfangled the sparrows chef and quesadero of the now deceased a dark lord Yeah, and his fucking I don't even get to kill my arch-never since he didn't die by these hands These Pan sexually attractive hands that what were you saying about them? You come weird weird. Yeah, aren't fair That's your judgment. See I'm not gonna even judge see it's even

I'm a hand guy. All right. Okay. What's okay? Everybody body part number one turn on go Number start Arnie guy. Okay, okay, what's okay? Everybody body part number one turn on go number start Arnie. What's your brand? What's your what's your what's your spice? What's your number one on the gift chart? I like faces. I like faces. Wow. Pretty faces. They're ugly faces. The working man's choice. Okay, Chent. Got to be Arnie's cake. Oh, let cake. Yum yum yum. Sticker for working. I'm done. Is he kicked up? Is he double? Is he on a Thursday afternoon? Is he kicked up? Come on Arnie show Can't I look I've been on the road a little while. I you know you got you got some cakes every day is my birthday with this cake

You want to take us to the bakery big daddy Professor scrambles. What's your favorite body part? That's it. Oh All six nipples All six nipples. All six nipples. Is that a band? I have to run over to the piano. Blood and soul. The sword just wants blood and souls.

Oh, it's a terrible amount of singing. Oh, it's a terrible amount of singing. If you sing that song, the sword will try to leap into my arms and kill. So we're all clear. That's an activating spell for that. I didn't intend that when it forged it, but here we are. Arden, I love how much Professor Scramble's ears flop back and forth when he plays the piano. They wobble too and throw.

Arden, can he tie him in a nut? Can he tie him in a bow? I'll finish the fucking song if you want. Can he throw them over? It's too late. Throw them over his shoulder? Like a continent soldier? Now go fetch him.

John, were you trying to tell me something? Do you have me? Maybe I have a table. Okay, hey, hey, hey, thanks for coming. So much room here under here. Now, right? Seven feet up. Look at the table, so tall.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. What's up, buddy? How you doing? This one is good to like check in. Everyone's in a tall. Hey, yeah, yeah. What's up, buddy? How you doing? It's good to check in. Everyone's in a line. Yeah, it's good to check in. You know what I was thinking? Here's the conversation I went in half.

You know how Yusufur is basically gone, like he's basically dead? He can't be on the podcast or else people know he's alive. Sure, sure. Who else do we know that's insecure, very loud, speaks in and pages not paragraphs and is here right now? Are you saying we should offer drip fang a permanent coho's position on this podcast? Yeah, just until you sir gets back on his, you know, fee, sort of speed. Yeah, if it's pause, whoa! But only you can hear right now.

This is you still speaking directly into your mind. We know who you are. Stop the- what's the reverb about? Me, you should all. Is it of the 12th Rail of Ephesius? Master of Light and Shadow. Miniculator of Magic of Light? The Valor of Chaos.

Champion of the Great Halls of Trockus. No, to the end. Who's the tanker? No, to the end. Because then when you hear the corresponding two. I know, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no mind-seat on this show, know that I would strike down your forms with a bolt of lightning directly from the sky. Fine, fine, fine, fine, let's just go back up. Spank, spank, spank, spank. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hearing users are talking my mind, I would have paid anything to know if at the same time Professor Scramble's lips were moving just a little bit.

Maybe, because I did give him some peanut butter. It's not a visual medium. Oh, and you said, or can you make sure that the things that you're saying into our heads also end up in the audio of the podcast? Uh, yes, all cast a spell, then we'll take care of that. Arnie, great thinking, great thinking. Mmm, sometimes you do have good ideas. Okay, back up, back up, back up.

Hey, Phil, it's a weird thing. When you guys run into that table having your conference, Obsidian Doom started growling. That was weird, because normally just whisper it's like a little nerve-wracking. It's so, so. Kind of like Soul Walker, but then you have one of the like, blind and to differentiate those IPs.

But normally, he'd me see more. What? Who's that? He'd me see more. See more. What? Oh, seed. You're talking about seed more, the plant lord.

I killed that guy too. Oh shit. It was a villain. And he found out I was in this town that I was working in a gargoyle rodeo. And was it your first one? Oh, yes. And he discovered, and he attacked me with his spores

at the Jopper's head off. Arnie, that was a real rude goofy laugh from someone who said, trying to save my bacon after footloose. Right, so when your sword was talking to you, you didn't notice my lips moving. Oh, it was growling. I was trying to figure out why I was playing shuffleboard

with a lovely couple over there. They're fucking right next to the shuffleboard, but they're able to still play shuffleboard while they fuck, which I think is honestly a multitasking feet that should be celebrated. Pretty impressive. At their age, very impressive. Yeah, they're shuffling off to fuckle though.

They're not spring chickens. Did you say, can I compliment you on that? That was honestly really good and I enjoyed it. Thank you, I hate you, heard what? I respect you. Thank you. No, hey. What?

I said that to one person on this podcast and one person only, and according to you, and I choose to believe you for now, he's fucking dead. So I hate you. Not gonna say I respect you. Okay. That was reserved for one's fucking dead. So I hate you. Not gonna say respect you. Okay. That was reserved for one opponent. Oh, I hate you.

Oh, absolutely. That's it. Arnie, did you wanna adjust your tie and say no respect? One, two. Two, look, let me tell ya. P.S., I'm loving the tie. It just brings a new energy. I know.

I know it's for you, so it's way. We're in a dangerous field here, fellas. No, I know what a tiger's a third, young. What? Professor's. I know it's for use in a way in a dangerous field here fellas. No, I know I take her see their young or what My grandma's not to Vinnie boom bot. Hey, this will really bring a younger demographic into this independent project that you guys have been undertaken as long as we don't start wrapping You know whenever we're saying that the elderly couple in the corner that are fucking gave us the thumbs up, that's how you know, that's who you want.

You want them with disposable income and disposable income. The second worst thing I've ever said on this podcast, and it was in one episode, what a treat. There's a lot of episode left. That ad break really threw me, I thought we were go to the left. Oh, that ad break really threw me. I thought we were close to the end of the way. I thought, yee heee. Hey, Professor Scrambles.

What are you, I'm sorry, what do you like to be called? I'm just calling you Professor Scrambles. Do you have a secret canine name? Do you have like many names that you're known by, by either elves, dwarves, anything like that? Oh, well, well, no, just a when name. Thank you for asking. No one's really asked me about me yet. Even though I've been here almost a month, you can just call me scrambles. Scramble, it is. Scramble's.

You just seem familiar. No, familiar enough that I'm not trying to kill Arnie or Chund, which has kind of been my thing for a while, you know. But there's something like, I just can't place about you that seems really, really just familiar. Yeah, well, I think what if I may interject, I think what it is is, do you know Flavia, the minor witch? Flavia, the minor witch. Yeah.

Is she, by any chance, related to Stivia? Yes. Well, Stivia is a poor substitute of Flavia, but Flavia. We all agree. We all agree. We all agree. Yeah, we all agree. Everyone, thumbs up over there.

Yeah, thumbs up over there. He was able to answer while amidst Doggy style. Good for him. Anyway, he was, I'm sorry to bring up Doggy style in front of you, Professor Grimble. You were saying about Flavia. Arnie, you said you listened to Doggy Style as a kid, right? Sure. Well, Flavia, the minor witch, Professor Scramble's used to be her familiar, which is why he looks that way. Hmm. Okay. Dusting off hands, my job is done.

That's just Arnie's wing to dog. Putticular thing. No? Wait, he was about to leave and he turned around and he had one more thing to say. He's gonna columbos. Brush off my trench coat. That was talking to my wife the other day. I don't have a wife. I can't, I can't keep up this Ruth. I really feel like I've swam all the way out to the Peter Falkland Islands.

It's just that we've this dog, may I call you a dog? Yeah, I'm a dog. There's a through one of those bottles, they have behind the bar, the light reflects off the mirror behind it and then through the bottle. The bottle is blue and a blue tint has fallen over the Professor's Grambles dog, and it's just that the color really suits. Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, it's a good color for me. And I suppose my little fur, my face,

looks like a little white beard, but I don't know if what conclusion I would like you to, but wait a minute. Blue reflected on a dog. It makes Blue. Reflected on a dog. It makes him look like he's got a fluffy white beard. This dog... is a spring. You're a spring, aren't you?

I am a spring. You like light tones as opposed to like deep, earthy ones, or maybe the grares of like somebody who wears like a winter. I'd spend some time in some fashion houses while I was doing evil work. You would not believe the evil that goes into fashion. But yeah, that's it. That's it. That's what the dogs is spring and that's all the detective work. I'll do because I'm not fucking detect. No, all my colors are jewel tones. Keep it that way. Professor scrambles. Yes, Professor scrambles.

I'm speaking into your mind right now. You can't do that. I'm well really I'm just whispering into your ear Oh, I guess that's a safe thing. I smell weird. You just smell your ear smells weird. I have no I'm really like deep in this ear to dog air No, you know what I mean you know what I mean, you know bitch. Yeah, I'll log if you've been in a relationship What are you trying to tell me Arnie? Well, just don't fuck this up. I think Trampeng's is on the scent of figuring out that you're really used to it. So true, it is about communication. I don't worry.

I'll run away, and I'll be right back. Wait, wait, Professor Scramble. He said you're a spring, so make yourself look more like a springer spaniel. Ruff, don't worry. I think Professor Scramble's, might be taking a break. Your next round's on me. and Teddy-Body asks.

Why is he wearing that so much? I have a company accent, and I'm pretending to be somebody else. That couple's great. I mean, they're 69-ing, and they still have time for a conversation. Yeah. Couldn't understand everything they said, but a lot of it. That's how you know it's working. So, what do you dip-shit's up to now that the only person

who does magic around you's dead? You thought I was dead? What? Oh shit. Oh, that's a leftover recording that we have. I'm not dead. I'm Ricky Dodo. What?

What the fuck? What the fuck? The Dodo? Oh. From the beginning of the episode? Yeah, the Dodo I mentioned that died. Oh. I wasn't in the tavern for that part, so mean not knowing that is excused and I was barely paying attention

Yeah, it's me Ricky dodo. Oh, hey I'm not dead. Oh my mistake sorry for bearing you alive Sorry about the state of your fingernails Chumped it's me. I know. I know. I know I know I know You'll some of a bitch come up here Yeah, dodo Ricky dodo. Yeah speaking into your ear. Okay. I'm just confirming and I'm so sorry if I'm wrong about this You're really use it all right. Okay, good. Hey come over here. You'll flightless bitch. Can I get you a drink? Yeah, Ricky dodo. Yeah, hey, I ricky. We're just about to go to a break

But why don't you sit down right here and I'll get you some Beverage or something and we'll be right back with more riki dodo. Who's this snake dork? Oh, you're fucked buddy So riki dodo yeah So Ricky dodo yeah How did you come back from the dead? I was never dead. You see the thing is I fell off a cliff and everyone assumed I died By my dodo bird so I flew away Yeah, I just spread my wings and I flew like the first I think think, yeah, I'm flightless, but it was like a miracle, maybe some magic fell on me.

Magic fell on you. Yeah, here in this magical land of food, maybe some magic fell on me and I just flew away or out of that cliff. Yeah, so magic fell off the back of a cart. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, maybe that's what happened exactly. He fell off a cliff and

everybody thought he died but he didn't, huh? So instead of falling to his death, he fell right ones. He really unsurelocked that mystery and I could hear Moriarty of that end of time I wanted. Well yeah, yeah, if you want to get technical about it, I suppose that yeah, you know, I that, you know, I still live on Baker Street and I still wear this hat everywhere it goes That's a regular. I love to go into my mind palace That's my that's not I'm not even having instrument. That's the button was a new admit make- I'm out that was very impressive. Thanks. I learned it on the road. I've been on the road for a little while I don't know I just I kind of been everywhere Ricky dodo. I didn't like you at first, but you're growing on me

God, thanks. I say that right now. Yeah, uh, you know, I like you too. You know, there's something about you It was me the wrong way, but I respect that and I try to be more patient with people as it god damn it I don't know which god, but damn it just I swear doing these good deeds is I swear to god man It's rubbing off for me. How do you guys do it? I can't like if I do something good by mistake Like I find myself like feeling rewarded for doing it and normally when I did that I felt like puking venom all over something. But now? Now? It's just like, it just keeps happening.

It makes all my skin crawl. If I'm being completely honest, like, we don't do that many good deeds. Like, it's kind of hard to really give you any perspective on that because I don't know. In seven years, one month and three weeks, how many good deeds, Trent, would you say we've done? Oh I would say two or three. Yeah, you killed the Dark Lord. I didn't kill the Dark Lord Everybody thinks I killed the fucking Dark Lord, but I didn't you just it's a big accomplishment in the realm of good Even if you didn't do a bunch of good things that one good thing I would think however you mother fuckers measure shit like this should count as a bunch of good things

Yeah, yeah, I agree with that and I think you store kind of let alive But he was trying to do a lot of good even if it always didn't work out not that I really knew him I'm just a big dumb dough dough and you should tell people more about how you killed the dark lord that way They won't think I fucking killed the dark lord You see what I'm saying? I'm trying to get everybody from the Iron Mafia, the Slytherin Syndicate, which is other snake-based villains. And what are some of the snake-based villains in the Slytherin Syndicate?

Cobra, which is the snake that serves. Oh yeah, there's his, direct-a-me. Yep, yep. Oh, oh. And the evil is that they're out of network. They're slither in, who's the guy likes the slide under the door. Yeah, he's a pervert, but in the bad way.

No offense to you guys fucking in the corner. Of course you guys slow down. I'm gonna write these down just in case we eventually want to have Paul F. Tomkins, Matt Gorilley, and Mark MacConville come and play all these. Oh, he talked, what the fuck? What the fuck? It's a kind of, you see, in terms?

There's that snake that can kind of do everything, Boa Jackson. Oh, yeah, he plays Mittens and Baselam. Mm-hmm. But the thing is, like, he heard his hip in a Mittens game, so it might shorten his career, yeah. And there's Garden Snake. He's not that harmful.

He's just he looks at and he scares you but then you realize there's not not a lot to him. There's al e Viper attorney at law. There's Python, but he's kind of like a C plus villain. Best. It's just a group that has Aspa man. Yeah. And he's all, he's like you, he's all cakes baby. Oh, yeah. Asks with four S's. Yeah, the Asper man. Don't confuse him though with Asper 10. He's related to Flavia.

Right. Or bad Asper Billy gun, which is the fun reference for, you know, a very strong run with that dog on the road. Exactly. Oh, yeah. See James. Mm-hmm. Yes, of course.

Let's see, we can keep going. What other groups of villains though? It seems like there are some other mob villains. There's the ring syndicate, there's, there's, ah! That's their name. They're real monsters. Real monsters.

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, they're usually on the afternoon. But yeah, we just call them the screech normally. Oh, yeah, so they had a, because we call them the screech, they were at first adorable and then problematic and now tragic. Didn't they do porn? They, or was that a room?

I don't know this, I don't know that they made it on purpose. I think there was a, or a ribold tale that was released about them without their knowing. I think that's a great idea. Are you sure you're thinking nothing of the, ah, no, that's a scaband from scab. Oh, no, I'm sorry, Drifeng, I'm sorry to correct. You were thinking of scab.

That's right, yeah. There's a, or or SCAA real monsters. They're both SCA bands. Didn't the screech used to be able to stop time and then they just sort of drop that? What was that all about? Yeah, it was right around the time that they replaced the principal with somebody else. But way before they went to college. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember that.

I mean, I remember as much as I can, I'm just a big dumb dodo. There's the sinister mix which is Yeah, they're there they're bartenders their mixologists, but they use their powers to kill Can I say and I know I'm probably in the majority here Can I just say the best part of the sinister mix is the sesame chip? We all agree right? Sesame chip is the best one out of those see that's a controversial stance, but I know it Yeah out of the sinister mix I have always enjoyed the absent Grebblin. Huh I like the melba ghost. Okay okay. Oh sure. Okay yeah I like

to crash you. Yeah alright I'm just a big dumb total. And I've killed my way through so many of them. And no, the blood of all of them is on my hands. That there's not all of them. There's a lot of them throughout there, but it's just... God, it's exhausting. And I thought that's what you guys are doing a lot of the time. I knew you guys were like dumb schmucks, but... Yeah, me especially.

Yeah, I just met you and I know you're stupid as shit, Ricky Dodo. Thanks. You know, when villains kind of come at us, we usually just invite them to the table and talk to them for a while. And not only think about it, it might discourage a lot of other villains from coming around,

because they just don't want to deal with the whole thing. Yeah, a lot of villains are in it for adrenaline and killing and fighting and such. And also plunder, you know, we like to profit from what we do. If I sit down and there's diplomacy between them and three other dipshit, then that's a waste of time. You know, and then time is currency according to all of the worst people

who write self-help books. Time out. Holy shit, Arnie, it worked. I did a time out. I did a time out and everyone froze, except for you. Is everyone else playing along? Arnie, did you freeze it all? Did you feel any muscles tense up or anything? No, because I wasn't paying enough attention

to know that you did a time out. That's my secret part. That must be it. Everyone who was paying attention to me is for, oh wait, hold on. I'm not moving because there is someone across the bar behind me pointing across Bo at me. Oh shit, we're being stuck up.

One time I do a timeout. Somebody's robbing us. He's moving. I'll stop moving, stop moving. He doesn't give me shade about you. He's here to kill me. He's part of the sinister mix. Is it?

It's Crave Case the Hunter Oh, no. From the white castle. Directly from the white castle, and he has a crossbow full of sliders. He will fire them, and they will kill the shit out of me. Oh, God, at least give you diarrhea. Can I just say his costume is nuts? It's so crazy. Look at it. It's a vest, but it's a tiger's face. What the fuck is that? It's Maine. That is nuts. He has a handle on his side. There's a lot going on. He also now finally makes fish sandwiches, which sounds illegal. Hey, honestly, yeah, all the time. So let's toggle that this real quick. When you're at White Castle, when are you thinking, hmm, time to see what the sea has brought us? Can I just say as

someone, I mean, I am a shapeshifter, but as someone who's been many animals, it's offensive to me that you think making a fish a sandwich is illegal? Fish need to eat too. So if you're making a fish sandwich, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no It's more about me having the white castle He got away he got away why I was talking again. Oh, they're fighting. They're fighting Watch out for the onion rings One one run is next. You got out of there. Ultimate Doom Slash!

Ah, this is such a good fight. We're mostly just watching it and not in any way nearer to what's happening. It's dead. Check his balls. Somebody's check his balls. Is that a dead? Check his balls? Okay. Check his balls. Check his balls. Check the grave case. They look fine from here.

But they're not moving. They aren't, they're not moving. I checked them. They're ice moving. They aren't they're not moving. I checked them their ice cold He's dead Dracene you saved us All right stop whispering me city and doing what given you a small blood Okay, well that's my cube. Oh, I forgot to mention I think tonight in about a few minutes It's it's villains night here, which is a weekly thing that happens at the George's. Oh my god.

The fuck are you sitting on that information for? Do you have a night where it's just villains here? Uh-huh. Mostly villains for the drink specials. Oh my god. That's catnip for us. It's a snakenip in my case. You give us a drink, but mostly, most of us just steal.

But still, if there's a disc you know if there's a if it's something that's normally pretty, but if there's some sort of disc kind of like, oh I'm getting a deal. It's so cheap you feel like you're stealing. It's that's it. Yeah, that's exactly it. All right. No, I just read that off the banner under where it says villain's night. It's so cheap it feels like you're stealing. Oh, that's marketing some of the evilest activity of all Commentary and drip bang. I know you got to go. You're immortal danger. I'll be more dangerous But how are your snakes doing? Everybody's good everybody's inside We're back up to our fighting weight and everybody's been reunited even resurrected a couple of the ones that were killed

Unfortunately and they're well not unfortunately, because that's hey, that's what I'll do. You done did it, Lads, Lads and Lasses, and everybody here. I'm going to check the Nether Realms for the Spirit of Usador, because anyone that powerful, anyone that grand in their magic or magical path here. I talked about all the fucking time about how like where he's been and a fizziest and all that out of the

Shea pretty cool. Yeah, I'll Check I'll go and I'll travel into the spirit dimension in the nether realms and hopefully at boom won't suit me for saying this and then If he's there then I'll fight him in the spirit plane. And I'll figure out a way to kill him, because it'll be a ghost town. Figure out I'll be the first knuckle man, so to kill a ghost. Here's a fun fact, you can't kill a ghost. And if you kill him on the spirit plane, maybe they'll give you like a discount, you know?

I know sometimes on the spirit plane, I know sometimes, hold on. There's no time for this. There's no time for this. I know, sometimes. I need to be heard. I need to be heard. Okay. Okay. If you don't let him. I know, sometimes I need to be heard. I need to be heard. Okay, okay.

If you don't let him do, we're gonna be hearing about it all. Okay, talk fast. We're on the frontier of something here. So I really need to be talking fast. Sometimes people give this to you. Don't give this to your blue balls. Sometimes people give this to your playing some shit. But you pay for what you get.

So yes, there are up charges, but that's, you know, if you wanna bring a magical sword or a full set of robes. Of course you have to pay a little extra. You, when you go to the regular realm, you know, you're paying that anyway, but it's baked into the price, but I feel like-

It's just this couple that's been fucking, hey guys, great job again. Sorry, keep going. No, I said my piece. I'm just, I'm, I'm slightly invested in this, so I just need to say my piece. Thank you so much. Spirit Halloween stores.

Oh God, this is the Spiritfuckin' dodo. Stop, I'm just a big dumb dodo. Ricky D, you son of a bitch. I'm a professor scramble. Yeah, it's how that dodo. And you, Sador, and you, Sador. We all miss you, Sador. Now, I swear, Drift Fang, the most villainous, remember here, stop calling me a hero, stop

singing songs about me, except about how attracted you are to me. So he feeds into my need for praise. I will find a way, somewhere or another, to destroy yous that are with these two hands. And this sword which continuously asks me for blood, you know, concerning cadence. And so I say to you, away! Window jump! Air Canada! Bye, love you, bye!

Hey, you! Hey, you too! It's so weird he jumped up, the window was closed, he hovered in mid-air, opened the window, and then went out. I've never seen that move before, and I gotta say, it breast. He's got cartoon moves that guy.

Seriously. Boop! You said, or, Rikki.Odo. Yeah, yeah. How you doing? Like, one of your arch nemesis was just here and seemed very close to discovering that you're really alive. Oh yeah, he was so close that Professor Scramble's

went to the other room and then Wink, Professor Scramble's created me to come in here and take his place. Just one more thing. I forgot to pay. It's like... When you get services good, even though, honestly, like I am still a villain and I will steal, but when services is good, you have to leave something behind.

Of course. You know what? It's on the house because you're the greatest hero in all phone. Fuck you! Fuck! Ah, fuck! Oh god! I like you! I like you! What? What I do? Uh, leaving this money here. Anyway, back flip out the window again! K! They shot it behind him! That's the crazy thing.

It's really impressive. And kiss the pin of glass. I didn't want to lift a heat out! I have to believe at least one of you has formed a positive association with the sound of my voice, because if you're hearing me, whatever was just happening is over. Professor Scramble's and Ricky Dodo were played with all the range and vocal flexibility of an uncooked piece of spaghetti by Matt Young. John Tla talking Badger was played by Adolfi, who was married over the weekend. Congratulations, Adolf! I hope she likes listening. I've learned that once every 17 years, an earth insect called the cicada emerges from the soil to make a shrill screaming

sound that everyone simply has to endure until it finally leaves. Bearing this in mind, please welcome back Drift Fang the Necromancer as played by special guest Kevin Serreta. Want more Drift Fang? Enjoy your Stockholm Syndrome and also season one of the Drift Fang and Baron Ragoon spin-off, Masters of Mayhem, is available on the Magic Tavern Patreon. With season two coming to the Patreon next month, speaking of the Patreon, I've just

been handed a list of some of my very favorite Patreon supporters. Chosen it random. People like, oh I don't know, Jacob Wheeler, Justin the Geek, redundant, Barbara F. Olivia K. in New York, Travis Pendleton, ah, good to know we have a chimney sweep on our side. Sean McNickle, Will and Lorraine, Sarah Lynn, Lindsay Krueger, Mia Nicholson, David Rogers, Katie T, Lila, Kathleen of the Harbor, isn't that the Ravenclaw House ghost? And AV Lilly, founder of the AV Club. These wonderful Patreon supporters not only helped the show get made, at the level of professional standard you're enjoying

even now, they get access to ad-free episodes and at least two new bonus episodes every month. Last week's bonus episode was the long-awaited return of Don, the Transdimensional Delivery Man, played by Joey Romaine. It is madness and not in a Dr. Strange Multiverse kind of way. Here's a clip. Hey! Hey! Oh my god. Here's one of your members.

I'm Arnie. I'm from Earth. I've got a package for you. Oh, good. Oh, the last time I saw you was at the wedding. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Oh, hey, so all right, yep. All right, All right. Should we get the business out of the way or should we?

You know let the you know Yes, that is conduct our transaction and you should be on your way What? Let us conduct our transaction you give us whatever it is you're here to deliver and then you'll be on your way Oh, this is so you know, that is the most thing that you would do. I gotta say, you know, I love it. This is so, you know, why, you know, some people sometimes I deliver back, you know, again, every, you know, it is insane to be, you know, listen, no, I mean, it is so,

you know what I'm going through here. I mean, sometimes I have to learn, I knew worlds for new worlds for, you know, sometimes it takes me seven years to deliver back to you. I have to learn how to assimilate into whatever dimension I'm in. So look, look, look. Do you know how different? Or you can just drop it off and go. No assimilation, no sense. Yeah, I just drop it off and go.

You know, you got something you got to drop off and go. And you can do it in the mens room! To learn more about supporting the show and our humble mission, go to patreon.com slash magic tavern. Hello from the Magic Tavern is produced by Arne Neekam, Matt Young and Adel Rafaia. Post-production coordination by Garage Shults. This episode edited by Anna Hoverman. Hello from the Magic Tavern logo by Allard Leban. Magic Tavern theme by Andy Poland.