High Performance Mindset | Learn from World-Class Leaders, Consultants, Athletes & Coaches about Mindset - 231:Dominate Your Reaction

Episode Date: February 6, 2019

“It’s not what you say to everyone else that determines your life; it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the greatest power.” Marc and Angel High performers dominate their APE. They focus on what they can control – their attitude, preparation, passion, purpose and effort and dominate their reaction to what they cannot control. They prepare full out use the 86,400 seconds in each day to their fullest capacity. They give their best day in and day out.   My High Performance Power Phrase: I dominate my APE. I am all in and focus on what I can control.

Welcome to High Performance Mindset with Dr. Sindra Kampoff. Do you want to reach your full potential, live a life of passion, go after your dreams? Each week we bring you strategies and interviews to help you ignite your mindset. Let's bring on Sindra. Dr. Sindra Kampoff with us today. High Performance Mindset on the Country Club. Good morning, Sindra. Good morning. It's great to be here. Your thoughts on the big game yesterday. Yes. I thought it was kind of uneventful. Yeah. Yeah.

We used the very overused term meh. Meh. Yeah. That's a good word. Pretty much it. Yeah. I wasn't really

excited about anything. No, I take that back. I did tell Lisa there was a Bud Light commercial with the mountain in it and they promo'd the Game of Thrones final season coming up. That got me kind of excited. I loved the NFL commercial. a Bud Light commercial with the mountain in it, and they promo'd the Game of Thrones final

season coming up. That got me kind of excited. I loved the NFL commercial. That was my favorite. Somebody did say that, too, on the text line this morning, that they enjoyed the NFL commercial the best. There were a lot, and they just weren't all that great. I don't know.

I think we're just so desensitized now. Yeah. We have such high expectations, don't we? Right. So today we're talking about, our topic is dominate your reaction. What's our quote today? This is a quote by Mark and Angel. It's not what you say to everyone else that determines your life.

It's what you whisper to yourself that has the greatest power. I love Mark and Angel. Follow them on social media. They're good. Awesome. Cool. Awesome. All right, so an example.

So, all right. So last night, the Patriots won the Super Bowl against the Rams. It was Tom Brady's sixth Super Bowl win. He's the only player with six titles. Right, that's huge. That's interesting. But I want to talk about the game before the Super Bowl against the Rams and the Saints, which determined who went to the Super Bowl.

And there was a missed pass interference call, or some people are saying also a missed helmet penalty towards the end of the game that everyone's talking about, or at least everyone was talking and there was a missed pass interference call or some people are saying also a missed helmet penalty towards the end of the game that everyone's talking about or at least everyone was talking about for a couple of weeks. There was lots of blaming of the officials, some calling for the NFL and Roger Goodell to be able to change the outcome of the game because of a missed call.

There was a lawyer, I think, in New Orleans that brought up a lawsuit. I think it was more for attention, but they were trying to get the game replayed because they thought it was unfair. Anyway, you were impressed with the way Drew Brees, the quarterback for the Saints, actually responded to the loss. Yeah, and I was watching and there's so much blame throughout the week, right? But I was so impressed with Drew Brees and this is what he said this week because he was at the Super Bowl and so a lot of media were asking him

what did he think and this is what he said. He said, you have to worry about the things that you can control. That's something that we can't control. I know there are things before and after the call that we could have controlled. And that's what we could have done better. That could have resulted in things different. And I focus more on the plays that we could have made that would have got us there anyway. Nice. That's pretty good. Yeah. As the leader of that team, that's good because there were a lot of teammates that did not feel the same. Absolutely.

And on the other side of the league, on the AFC side of things, you know what? If the Chiefs stay on sides, the Patriots aren't even in the Super Bowl. Absolutely. So there's a call that way, too, that could have gone a little bit different. How does this coincide with our topic today with dominate your reaction? So I think the key is what I was most impressed with was his ability to really stay focused on what he could control. And he was even saying there are things that we could have done that would have determined the outcome. And, you know, we know that high performers in sport, business, and in life, they focus on what they can control.

They dominate the controllables and they dominate their reaction. And it's a simple concept, but honestly, difficult to practice every day. I was just thinking about my day yesterday, and I was thinking, how many times did I focus on what I couldn't control? And I bet it was 10, right? Over under was 10. Yeah, over under was 10. And I'm thinking about this, the Saints reaction. There were so many fans that were upset, billboards that were purchased to kind of, you know, demonstrate how upset they were. But really, it's something that we can't control. And when we focus on what we can't control, it leads to blame and frustration and not being at our best.

So let's talk about and point out some of the things that we do not have control over. So I think this is important for us to remember that for the last couple of weeks, we can't control the weather, right? Or the environment. And it's really easy to blame that which we can't control. You know, at work, we can't control our boss. We can't control our colleagues or the competition at work. We can't control other people's reactions or feelings or mistakes. In sports, we can't control the conditions of the field or the officials. And I think that's really important because all of this leads to us not being at our best. So tell us a little bit more than why it's important that we don't focus on those kind of things. What happens to us when we do?

Yeah. You know, I think it's foundational to performance that we focus on what we can control. And when we focus on what we can't, you know, my theory in pro sports is for every minute they're focused on what they can control is one less minute than they're in the league. Because I think that's how it impacts performance. You know, for us, it might be for every minute we're focusing on what we can control is one less minute than we're happy. Maybe even one less dollar that we're earning in our life. So it's really important that we stay focused on what we can control. Scared straight almost on that right there. Yeah, let's go.

Talking to an NFL player and you're like, every minute is one less minute in the league? Whoa. Yeah, gets their attention, doesn't it? Yeah. Absolutely. Lisa, this acronym we've heard before, but... We have, yeah, APE.

Yes. What can we control? So I'm going to say the A is the attitude. You know, you can control your attitude every second. And is your attitude really getting you towards where you want to go, towards your goals? Or is it, you know, getting you further away? I think that's important is to really dominate that. All right. What else can we control? The P of the APE stands for several different words like passion, purpose, perseverance,

preparation. And the way I'm thinking about it is, you know, are you living with purpose and passion? That's something we can control. And are you living in a way that you want to be? And are you using, you know, your 86,400 seconds in a day that's, you know, towards where you want to be and where you want to go? So what's the last thing we can control? I'm going to say E for effort. And that is, you know, being really all in with your goals, giving your best every day, not just going through the motions. And so, you know, the question I'd ask is, are you showing up in the world at practice or at work or with your family?

You're all in. So APE, attitude. And then P stands for passion, purpose, perseverance, preparation, and E for effort. All right. So you've got a final point? So today, when you see yourself focused on things you can't control, maybe you're getting worked up or bothered by what someone else said, focus on what you can control.

And I think that's really important to dominate your reaction to events or people around you and choose to center your focus on what you can control. Keep you on track, not slowed down or off purpose. How do we summarize this topic today then? So I'd say high performers dominate their ape. They focus on what they can control and they use their time, their 86,400 seconds in their day to reach their full capacity to give their best.

That's a lot of seconds. There's a lot. In a day to get things done. It shows you what we can do, right? I don't know why they go by so fast, but at the end of the day, you're like, where'd they all go? But when you look at it, that's a big number. What's the power phrase today? I dominate my ape. I am all in and focused on what I can control.

I think I've seen dominate your ape t-shirts out there too. So if you really need the visual reminder, go get yourself a t-shirt. If we want to keep up to date with you and listen to the podcast, grab the book, any of that good stuff that I know you're up to out there, how do we get in touch? You can head over to Dr. Sindra. So D-R-C-I-N-D-R-A. The information I talked about today, at least the concept is in my book, Beyond Grit. So you can get that there too. All the details at drsindra.com. Sindra Kampoff with us today. Thank you very much. Thanks for having me. Thank you for listening to High Performance Mindset. If you liked today's podcast, make a comment, share it with a friend,

and join the conversation on Twitter at Mentally Underscore Strong. For more inspiration and to receive Sindra's free weekly videos, check out DrSindra.com.