High Performance Mindset | Learn from World-Class Leaders, Consultants, Athletes & Coaches about Mindset - 32: Command Your Fear

Episode Date: March 4, 2016

In this live interview on 93.1 with TJ and Lisa, Dr. Kamphoff talks about how fear is part of the human experience. We can let fear take over our body and mind, or we can command it. In this interview, Cindra talks about 3 types of fears that we all experience and provides 4 steps to command your fear. She provides a personal example to illustrate how to command your fear.

Welcome to High Performance Mindset with Dr. Sindra Kampoff. Do you want to reach your full potential, live a life of passion, go after your dreams? Each week we bring you strategies and interviews to help you ignite your mindset. Let's bring on Sindra. Time for High Performance Mindset on The Country Club today with Dr. Sindra Kampoff. Good morning, Sindra. It's great to be here. Great to have you in again. I was telling Lisa that I've been getting, I unfortunately had fallen behind on my podcasts. Oh, yeah. The good news is I've been all of last week.

And for what it's worth, I'll have some still to go this week. But I've been getting caught up with them while I run. My training runs. Excellent. So I've been putting on the earbuds and grabbing the iPhone and listening to the podcast. And I love it because I can pick something out from just about everybody that you know, that you interview. I'm like, Ooh, that's a good one. And whether it's something I utilize for myself or something where with track season coming up and we're going to get back into coaching, I'm like, Oh, remember that mental note, you know, say it again several times in your head

so you don't forget it kind of thing. Uh, some useful stuff there. So people should be following the podcast if they're not. We'll talk a little bit more about how to find it and get signed up and receive those so you can listen to them as well in just a little bit. Today we're talking about one short little word, but it is so daunting and scary. The word is fear. So examples of fear for today, Sandra, what are we talking about? I'm going to talk about a personal example because to show that everyone struggles with fear. And what we're talking about today is commanding your fear. And so I'm currently writing my first book on high performance, and I'm so excited for the impact this book's going to make.

And I can't wait for everyone to read it. I can't wait for you both to read it. Right. I am looking forward to it as well. But to be honest, it's hard. It's hard writing a book. And what's interesting is I found it to be easy to write things like newspaper articles or magazine articles. But this is different.

It's scarier. It's bigger. And I have found it takes a lot of discipline over my fear and command over my fear. And when I let those fears take over my body and I don't command them, this is what I think about. What if people will criticize the book? What if it's not the outcome that I expected? Like, what if I'm not proud of the book like I expect to be? And what if it continues to be hard? And when I say those out loud, I realize I should not believe them. Right. Yeah, I'm like, that's a lot of what ifs. Yeah, but the fear can be very, very real in our mind. And my mind's like everyone else's.

So today we're talking about commanding your fear. So what kind of fear do we experience? I imagine like, you know, there's the, like you're saying you're terrified of the book, but this is all stuff right now that's going on mentally. Absolutely. Inside your head. Absolutely. There has to be other kinds of fear. So there's really three types of things that we fear. The first type is we fear pain. So what if we try something and we lose something? So what if we try something and we lose confidence or we lose security? Or if we try a diet, what if we lose the foods that we really love? Or what if we lose money or status in our society or status in our family? And that's pain? That's pain. Okay. Yeah, it's pain. So,

you know, what if I quit my job and do what I'm really passionate about and lose money or lose And that's pain? So one, the first example is pain. The second example of fear is difficulty. So you heard that this in my example, like what if it's going to be hard? And we make up stories in our head about how hard it's going to be or how difficult it's going to be. And we kind of spin in pools of negativity and pessimism because we're thinking about how difficult it might be. So we don't go after our goals and our dreams because we think about the difficulty. So we don't go after those things that we really want because it just might be really hard.

We're going to have to put in a lot of hours into our training or a lot of hours into our career or a lot of hours into education or a lot of hours into figuring out something new that we don't know. We've had a lot of people, and even whether it's kids at home or athletes in high school, well, it's really hard. And we're like, of course it's hard. If it was easy, everybody would do it. And that's so true. You have to want it. You got to put in the work. And if you think about it, you've never accomplished anything that was worthwhile without difficulty and, you know, learning something new and putting yourself out there. Right. So the third type is really about the result.

So we fear and we think about the result or the outcome. You know, what if I lose? What if this doesn't work? Gosh, what if I suck? Yeah. Embrace it, right? We talked about that. There we go.

Embrace the suck. There we go. What if, you know, what if I fail miserably? But I think the key is, is that we're too close to judge things that happen in our lives and events that happen. Because I think everything happens for a reason. And it's really hard to judge things when they happen. You never know if they don't happen because something better is supposed to happen. Okay.

So what do we do then? How do we manage these three types of fear that we experience in order to, I don't know, turn it into something a little more positive? Absolutely. I think the first thing is to take command of it. This is what I mean by it. I think fear gets too much credit. You know, I think people say, well, I just have too many fears or maybe they don't say

it, but they think it. So we have to take command of our fear. And most of our fears are what ifs, you know, followed by something negative. So we have to notice that fear and take command of it. Say something positive back to yourself. But this is the new thing that I've never talked about that I just learned. So say something positive. But then if the positive statement were true, what would be the next thing that you would do? So what would be your next action if it was really in alignment with your goals and what you wanted to do? Okay.

So what's your next possible action? So hopefully someday when the time comes and that is the actual result. It's like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Yeah, exactly. Then you'll know what the next step is. In a good way. And then you take the next step. Okay, so I'm going to give you

an example because everybody experiences this, so I'm working on this stuff too. Sure. Alright, so my what-ifs that I just told you were, what if people are critical of the book? What if it's not original? What if the outcome is not what I expected? What if

it's going to continue to be hard? So I'm taking command. This is my positive statement. Okay. Okay, you ready? I will make it my original work because no one else has the brain and has the experience or read the books or research that I have. It represents my frame of high performance that has improved NFL athletes, Olympic athletes, entrepreneurs, championship teams. It works. It will be incredible. It will be informed entrepreneurs, championship teams. It works.

It will be incredible. It will be informed by practice and science. It is my voice, and this book will change my life, and it will change the lives of other people. Nice. All right. There you go. That's good.

So you're going to keep that one posted on the mirror in the morning when you get up, and you can read that one every day. In fact, I'm going to take this recording, and I'm going to... Put it on a loop. I'm going to put it on a loop. I'm going to put it on a loop. I'm going to listen to it when I sit down to write every day. That's my next possible action or my next action that I'm going to take is to record this, listen to it every day and commit. I'm telling you, you and everyone listening, I'm going to commit to writing three hours a day.

All right. Wow. That's awesome. That is my next possible action. Okay. That's what I'm going to take. Well, and I think we've heard it several times from people that have written books before. There are those moments that you just kind of get a block and you have to push through.

And then once you get through, it kind of opens a floodgate once in a while. And you really start cruising along and it might happen again. And you're just kind of with the good comes the bad. And you've got to roll with it. Yeah. Any final points on this topic of fear for today? I would encourage those who are listening to, as you listened, I'm hopeful that you thought about your fears. And I would encourage you to do something like I just shared.

So think about your what-ifs. Then take command of them. Notice something. Say something positive. Write it out like I did. And then think about if that statement was true, what would be your next action? Because the bravest battle you'll fight is the battle within. And you will figure it out. You'll take control.

And when we lead a high-performance personal life, that leads to a high performance in sport and business in our career. Awesome. All right. Well, what else was going on with Cindra Kampoff this week? You know what I'm stoked about? Friday, I am traveling to San Diego, and I'm speaking at the Nike Football Coaches Conference. Wow. Cool. Very cool. That's a cool experience, but just traveling to San Diego in and of itself is pretty cool.

So I'm doing the keynote in the morning and then a breakout in the afternoon. So I'm excited. And I want to give a shout out to Farron Workus. She's actually a MSU track and field athlete who's been my intern. So she has, since August, helped me record every video that

you get and helped me edit every podcast since August. And she's leading the nation in the pole vault. I saw that the MSU men and women did very well this weekend, including in the pole vault at the Indoor Track and Field Championship. So that was nice to see. Yeah. Those are some mentally tough kids right there in that track and field team.

Absolutely. Doing what they're doing. So I was thinking about how, you know, especially in the pole vault, it takes a lot of command over your fear because she's in the air 13 feet, five inches. So I want to thank her for everything she's done, but give her a shout as a great example of having command over your discipline and your mind. Awesome. Good for her and congratulations. Now, if we want to get in touch with you, there are a lot of things going on.

There's the videos, there's the website, there's the podcasts. What's one place we can go to get all the information on all of that? You can go to cindracampoff.com. All the podcasts are up there. And then you can subscribe to this podcast on iTunes and Stitcher Radio if you have an Android. We'd love for you to leave a comment, a rating. And so then that helps us just get in front of other ears. Sure.

A lot of good stuff on there. As I said, I'm getting caught up right now. I kind of fell a little bit too far behind, but it gives me some stuff to listen to while I'm out running on my training runs for Grandma's Marathon, and I appreciate it. There's always good stuff in there. Thank you very much, Cindra. Thank you for listening.

Absolutely. Yep, we'll have Cindra back in again next week on Monday at about 7.30. High Performance Mindset here on Minnesota 93. Thank you for listening to high performance mindset. Are you signed up for Sindra's weekly email with free mental tools and strategies for high performance? Why the heck not text mentally strong, all one word to two to eight to eight or visit Sindra camp off.com.