High Performance Mindset | Learn from World-Class Leaders, Consultants, Athletes & Coaches about Mindset - 348: A Key Factor to Happiness

Episode Date: June 22, 2020

Two Harvard psychologists recently found in a study that 47% of the time our mind is not in the present moment. The amount of time our mind is not in the present moment is connected to our unhappiness. Staying in the present is so important because the present moment is also the ONLY place high performance happens and the only place we can be great leaders and parents. The key is to give up on nursing those grudges, or recalling the past when things didn’t go well. We need to train ourselves not to live in the future focused on pressure, fear and anxiety. Remember that staying in the present moment more often is all about awareness first, and a choice second.   This week’s Power Phrase:  “I own the moment. I train my mind to be in the present, right here, right now.”

Hi friends, my name is Dr. Sindra Kampoff, a national leader in the field of sport and performance psychology. Every week I'm on the local radio sharing my top tips on exactly how to develop the mindset of the world's best, so you can accomplish all your dreams. Get ready for a jammed, packed episode focused on practical tips to help you get after your goals and step out of your comfort zone. Let's go. Cinder Kampoff on the line with us today, a key factor to happiness. Good morning, Cinder.

Good morning. It's great to talk to you both. Yeah, you too. You are our key factor for happiness on a Monday morning. What inspired the topic today? Well, I was reading this study and I couldn't believe the results. So these two psychologists from Harvard found in the study that people spend 47% of their waking hours thinking about something other than what they're doing. So that's almost 50% that their mind isn't focused on what they're doing. And they described that how often our mind leaves the present is more of a predictor of a person's unhappiness than what they're doing. So they describe that the ability to really think about what is not happening comes at an emotional cost. And I thought that would be really helpful for us to talk about today.

Yeah, absolutely. For sure, Cinder. And why is it so important for us to know about this and talk about it? Well, I think by our very nature as people, we're mind wanderers. And obviously, the study shows us that this makes us unhappy. So it's kind of perplexing. If this is just our natural tendency, how do we really train it? And I think it shows you why it's really important for us to train our minds to be in the present so that we can be happier.

And we can spend a lot of time really thinking about what's going on around us, maybe be stressed or anxious about that. Or we can contemplate events that have happened in the past. Or sometimes we can imagine the worst case scenario in the future that may never happen. And those are times when we're not in the present. I definitely notice times when I'm not in the present when I'm interviewing people. If I'm not specifically paying attention and listening wholeheartedly, it doesn't go as well. It doesn't go as well. But sometimes that happens because other things are happening around me. But what's important for us to remember about being in the present?

Well, I think the important thing to remember is that your mind can be in really three places, the past, the present or the future. In the past, this is where we hold grudges, or we think about instances where maybe we're mistreated and we think about them over and over again or we ruminate on losses or failures or rejects. And in the future, this is where we experience anxiety and fear and pressure and we worry about things that may never happen or that we won't get the result that we want. So I think it's important to remember that those emotions happen either in the past or the future. So, Cinder, why is it so important to remain in the present

and not allow ourselves to be kind of consumed of either what has happened or what could happen? For sure. I think the important thing is to remember that our best only can happen in the present moment. That's the only place that we can be our best self as a leader. And obviously, the study shows us that being in the present is connected to our happiness. So I think that's really key is to remember that your best can only happen in the present moment, not when you're focused on the past or the future. And you're really locked in on the small things that you have to do or what's called the process. So is there a specific way or a strategy

that can help us improve our ability to be in the present? Yes. So, you know, even though that we're mind wanderers by default, we can train our mind to be in the present. And I think actually we must, given what the study said, that it's connected to our happiness. So bottom line, how I would describe it is that being in the present is all about awareness first and a choice second. And what this means is that we first have to just notice where our mind is, that's awareness, and then a choice to bring it back to the present moment. And it really is a choice. So we might take a deep breath and bring it into our mind and back into the present. Or we might use like a phrase like right here, right now to bring our mind back to the present. Or you could notice

what's going on around you. Maybe if you're outside the beautiful trees or if you're with your family, it might be noticing your kids' faces or you're holding a baby like their toes when you're holding the baby. So the point is just getting your mind back to the present. You can do that just by being aware first and then bringing it back second. So how would you summarize today for us? I'd summarize that, you know, a recent study found that 47% of the time our mind is not in the present, which leads us to feeling unhappy. So we have to train it to improve our happiness.

And the present moment is the only place where our best happens. It's the only place where high performance happens. So we have to give up kind of nursing these grudges and thinking about things that didn't go well in the past. And instead, remember that staying in the present is really about awareness first and a choice second. What is our power phrase heading through the week? I own the moment. I train my mind to be in the present right here, right now. All right, right here and right now. Let us know how to contact you, how to get more information on Beyond Grit. You bet. You can head over to my website, DrCindra.com and Beyond Grit. You can find it over on that website and go to the book website or the book tab and

you can put in a code free ship all one word and get the book shipped to you for free. Dr. Cinder Kampoff, thank you so much. Have an excellent day. You too. Thanks for having me. Way to go for finishing another episode of the high performance mindset. I'm giving you a virtual fist pump. Holy cow, did that go by way too fast for anyone else? If you want more, remember to subscribe and you can head over to Dr. Sindra for show notes and to join my exclusive community for high performers where you get access to videos about mindset each week. So again, you can head over to Dr. Sindra. That's D-R-C-I-N-D-R-A.com. See you next week.