High Performance Mindset | Learn from World-Class Leaders, Consultants, Athletes & Coaches about Mindset - 410: How to Have a Short-Term Memory of Mistakes

Episode Date: February 24, 2021

In this episode, Dr. Cindra Kamphoff talks about how the World’s Best in every field have a short-term memory of their mistakes and a long-term memory of their successes. Moving on quickly after a mistake helps us be confident and become or remain a high performer. You can use the strategy Cindra talks about in this episode (Learn, Burn, Return) to move on quickly from a mistake taking the lesson and remaining confident.  Phrase this Week: “I learn and burn having a short term memory of my mistakes.”  Quote of the Week: “Failure is an event, never a person; an attitude, not an outcome; a temporary inconvenience; a stepping stone. Our response to it determines just how helpful it can be.” Zig Ziglar        

Hi friends, my name is Dr. Sindra Kampoff, a national leader in the field of sport and performance psychology. Every week I'm on the local radio sharing my top tips on exactly how to develop the mindset of the world's best, so you can accomplish all your dreams. Get ready for a jammed packed episode focused on practical tips to help you get after your goals and step out of your comfort zone. Let's go. Dr. Cinder Kampoff joining us on the phone this morning again, and it's time to get,

you know, your head right. How to have a short-term memory of mistakes. Cinder, what are we talking about today? Today, we're talking about failure, and I'm going to start with this quote by Zig Ziglar, which is one of my favorite quotes. He said, failure is an event, not a person, an attitude, not an outcome, a temporary inconvenience, a stepping stone. Our response is to determine just how helpful it can be. And how do we use that for our conversation today? Well, you know, every athlete, leader, entrepreneur, salesperson, you know, even you or I, we need to let go of our mistakes quickly. And it's not something that's very natural for us as humans.

Often we beat ourselves up when we fail. And today we're going to talk about a catchy phrase I have in my book, Beyond the Grit, called learn, burn, return. And it's a way, you know, a strategy you can put in your toolbox to move on quickly from mistakes or failure. So why is it important for us to have a short-term memory of our mistakes? Well, when we hold on to them, it impacts our confidence and ultimately our performance. And when we don't have kind of compassion with ourselves and move on quickly, we, you know, run the risk of just getting burned out, feeling rejected, giving up. And it's, you know, really easy to give up and take that mistake personally and believe really it's all about you. But I think the key is, when you look at how the world's best

think, they really do have a short term memory of their mistakes and failure, and a long term memory of their successes. And that's important just to consider. Can you give us a little example of when this happens to be important in our lives? I was reading this article about how we're all in sales in some way. And this expert is talking about how we all sell ourselves. Like, for example, we apply for a new job or we're trying to make a sports team. And, you know, I think when we take that approach, we can easily kind of face rejection. And maybe even in business, you know, you might have someone say no to your face or a potential client chooses a different project or service. And I think the important thing is to remember that the rejection is not about you.

You know, maybe it's just a wrong time or the product isn't right for that person. But it's really easy just as humans, Lisa, to kind of get in this fight or flight response to failure and just react emotionally, which doesn't help us learn and then protect our confidence. Yeah, it's like we take it too personally. So can you tell us about your learn, burn and return strategy? Yeah, it's one of my favorite tools to use, and I use it almost daily. And it goes like this. So learn, the first thing you need to do after you make a mistake or fail is to ask yourself, what did you learn objectively? And what I mean by objectively is to stay unemotional, just focus on the future instead of the past. And you could

start with the sentence like, next time I will. And I think the key is, is to remember that we're meaning making machines. So we want to intentionally choose meaning to attach to that failure. That's what we need to learn. But then after the learn, you don't have to keep holding on to it. And the key next is to burn it. And by burn it, I just mean let it go. Because you don't have to keep holding on to it and the key next is to burn it and by burn it i just mean let it go because you can't think about two things at once you can't think about what just happened and what you're doing right now in the present and then return means you know after you learned and burn you check your body language make sure it's strong and tall and confident and you check your own self-talk you know at least so many times after we fail or make a mistake, we're beating ourselves up.

So instead, decide to say something empowering to yourself, like, you know, I'll get it next time, or I'm incredible at my work, or I will close the next one. Sure, sure. Do you have a final point then? Yeah, Lisa, I'd say, you know, you can use the learn, burn, return strategy any time you make a mistake. Let's say at work or in sport or in your business or with your family. Like I said, I use it almost daily. And you can teach your team the strategy

or your family the strategy, just reminding them to have a short-term memory of their mistakes and failure. Can you summarize today for us, Sandra? Yeah, I'd say the world's best in every field have a short-term memory of their mistakes and a long-term memory of their successes. And this helps us be confident and become or remain a high performer. So you can use the strategy Learn, Burn, Return to quickly take the lesson from the mistake and move on. So what is our power phrase moving forward this week? I learn and burn having a short-term memory of my mistakes. Sandra, if people want to get in touch with you, learn more about the book, learn more about learn, burn, and return, where do they go?

You can head to beyondgrit.com, and that's where you can get the book. You can put in a free ship, all one word, to get that book sent to you for free. And if you want to learn more about the work I do one-on-one with people or the speaking and keynoting I do, you can head over to drcindra.com. So D-R-C-I-N-D-R-A.com. Way to go for finishing another episode of the High Performance Mindset. I'm giving you a virtual fist pump. Holy cow, did that go by way too fast for anyone else? If you want more, remember to subscribe and you can head over to Dr. Sindra for show notes and to join my exclusive community for high performers where you get access to videos about mindset each week. So again, you can head

over to Dr. Sindra. That's D-R-C-I-N-D-R-A.com. See you next week.