High Performance Mindset | Learn from World-Class Leaders, Consultants, Athletes & Coaches about Mindset - 617: Speak and Communicate with Impact with Joel Weldon, Hall of Fame Speaker and Speaking Coach

Episode Date: May 9, 2024

You're here because high performance is one of your mindsets. You're already good at what you do and you know there's still more that you can do on your journey both personally and professionally. One of the most famous high performers in the world of business and finance is Warren Buffett. He is ranked as the number one investor of all times and is now one of the world's richest men. Warren said, "You can improve your value by 50% just by learning communication skills and public speaking."  That's why I wanted you to meet our special guest, Joel Weldon. Joel is my personal speaking skills coach and a Hall of Fame professional speaker, He is the creator of the Ultimate Speaking System for entrepreneurs and business owners as well as executives to speak even more effectively by following one of the most important mindsets ordinary speakers just don't have. If you rated yourself using a 1 to 10 scale on your ability to speak in front of a group, made up of your ideal audience members, what would that number be right now? It can be anywhere from one which would mean, I'm terrified to speak and I hate it to 10 which would be, I love to speak and I'm amazing at it.  Wherever you are on that scale, the mindset that Joel is going to share with you can help you be an even better speaker and communicator. Joel has been paid to speak at over 3,000 events and has personally coached well over 10,000 speakers. He is considered one of the highest performing speakers and speaking skill coaches in America. I have seen how he can turn an ordinary presentation into an extraordinary one. You will too.  In this episode, Joel and Cindra discuss:  How to start and end a presentation or speech  His NFV Formula to connect with the audience How ordinary speakers get it wrong How to choose the best story to tell And, how to start a story   HIGH PERFORMANCE MINDSET SHOWNOTES FOR THIS EPISODE LEARN MORE ABOUT JOEL WELDON AND HIS ULTIMATE SPEAKING SYSTEM  FOLLOW SIGN UP FOR THE FREE MENTAL BREAKTHROUGH CALL WITH CINDRA’S TEAM TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE MENTALLY STRONG INSTITUTE Love the show? Rate and review the show for Cindra to mention you on the next episode.

Welcome to episode 617 of the High Performance Mindset Podcast. You're here because high performance is one of your mindsets, and you're already good at what you do, and you know that there is still more that you can do in your journey, both personally and professionally. And one of the most famous high performers in the world of business and finance is Warren Buffett. He is ranked as the number one investor of all time and is now one of the world's richest men. Warren said this, you can improve your value by 50% just by learning communication skills and public speaking. And that's why I wanted you to meet our

special guest today, Joel Weldon. Joel is my personal speaking skills coach and a Hall of Fame professional speaker. he is the creator of the ultimate speaking system for entrepreneurs and business owners as well as executives to speak even more effectively by following one of the most important mindsets ordinary speakers just don't have if you rated yourself right now using a scale of one to 10 on your ability to speak in front of a group made up of your ideal audience members, what would that number be right now? You know, it could be anywhere from 1, which would mean I'm terrified to speak and I hate it, to 10, which would be I love to speak and I'm amazing at it. Wherever you are on the scale, the mindset that Joel is going to share with you can help you be an even better speaker and communicator.

Joel has been paid to speak at over 3,000 events and has personally coached over 10,000 speakers. He's considered one of the highest performing speakers and speaking coaches in America. And I've seen how he can turn an ordinary presentation into an extraordinary one. He has helped me and you will see that too. Please welcome my coach, my friend, and hopefully the man who's going to help you

become an even better speaker. Help me welcome Joel Weldon. Joel, I'm so excited to hear you and have you on the podcast today. Let's start with what is the mindset of an ordinary speaker compared to an extraordinary speaker? Well, Zindra, thank you for that great introduction. And as you're listening, remember why you're here. You know that this podcast is about your mindset. How do you think? And think when you're in an audience, what is the mindset of the person running that meeting?

And it could be a team meeting. It could be a business meeting. It could be an event that you're going to. But it could be a one-on-one presentation. Anytime you're speaking to more than one person, it's a presentation. So think about how you feel when you're in the audience and you listen to what the first thing a speaker says. And this is where most ordinary people go wrong is they have the mindset about themselves. They're thinking about themselves, not the audience. Now, how do you verify that?

Listen to what the first thing a speaker says. It usually is something like this. I'm so excited to be here. No one cares that you're excited to be there. They're there for a reason. Or I'm so looking forward to sharing my ideas with you. No one cares that you're looking forward to the idea. They want to know what's in it for them. So that's the mindset that if you have that, anytime you make a presentation, again, to a prospect, to a team member, at an event, an industry event where you're a guest speaker or being interviewed on a video, make it about them. And here are three words that will help you always connect with your audience and show them

immediately that what you're there for is to help them, not about you. And the three words are the words that I began our discussion with. After I thanked I said, you're here because. Those are the three words. If you would just begin that. So let's say you're talking to your team members. You're here because you're a member of XYZ team. And you show up for work every day. And hopefully you love what happens in this business. But the purpose of this meeting is to help you know how it could be even better. And you're going to have an opportunity. All right. And then we go into a presentation.

So the suggestion is open with your here because. And once you say those three words, you can't add an I. And there's a difference. So here's your assignment. Look at the last email you wrote to a client or a prospect or a team member or a supplier. Look at the first two paragraphs. Circle the number of I's versus the number of you's. And that's the magic mindset that can help you take your speaking and communication skills to an even higher level. When you get home tonight and talk to your family, if you've got kids or a spouse or significant other, is the first word I or is the first word I, or is the first word you? Oh, wait till I tell you what happened to me on my day. No one cares. Well, that's not true. Your family does care. But what if you began with,

tell me about your day. What did you do that was exciting? What was the best thing that happened to you today? So that's the mindset. If you can get yourself out of the way and make everything that going through your brain, when you have to speak in front of a group about your audience, about your listener, not about yourself. Now that doesn't mean that you can't share your personal story, that you can't talk about your feelings, but not in the opening. The opening sets the tone for everything. And it's amazing in watching thousands of presentations and having coached thousands of speakers, how the opening is about them. Professional speakers do that. I'm so excited to be here. And boy, did I have a difficult time getting here. You know, when I took that flight from Phoenix, it was delayed. I couldn't

make the connection in Dallas. And they go on their trip. No one cares. I knew you were going to say that. No one cares. And of course, Cintra knows when I say that, working with her, when she gets into some of these wonderful stories, but there's a word to add when I say no one cares. So as you're listening, when you think that no one cares, put the word unless in. No one cares unless what you're saying can meet one of their needs or overcome one of their fears or concerns or worries or reinforce one of their successes or the positive things that have happened. That makes it about them. You can certainly, as I said, add personal things only if it's relevant to their situation, their needs, their fears, their victories. So does that make sense? And you're a professional speaker. You know this. Yes, this makes sense to me. And Joel, you know, one of the things that I've really appreciated

about working with you is a couple, lots of different things, but I'll share the power of what you just said is typically I've had a traditional intro where the person comes up and says, here's all the great things that Cinder's done. Since working with you, we start with why they're here in the introduction. And then there's a few things that are most important about my work so that they buy into what I'm talking about, right? But it starts with them. And I've changed my opening so that it does start with like, you're here because. And you know what I noticed the first time I did that?

Is in a traditional intro, when someone intros you, people are kind of looking at their phones and they're like, they don't really listen. And then all of a sudden, it's like, you you're here because and people look up and they pay attention because they're talking about them right so that's the power of what what you're sharing and even if you're not a professional speaker I've learned so many different things from you that just continues to help me be an even better speaker and I want to talk about the even better part. And I love the words that you use. And tell us a little bit about why you use the even better.

Let's start there. Well, okay, that's such a great, well, I'm glad that these ideas have been so helpful. And as you're listening, the chances are you're not a professional speaker, but you're a professional at something. And since everything Sindri talks about is your mindset determines everything, if your mindset is always about your audience

or the listener, how does this help them? That gets you out of the way. So as an example, one of the tools in these systems that I've created is if I said to you as you're listening, this can help you make more money, or this can help you get in better shape. Do those sound like good statements? Make more money, get in better shape. But if you listen carefully to what was said, it really infers you're probably not making a lot of money now. This can help you make more money because you're really struggling financially. Or this will help you get in better shape because you're not really in great shape. But when you add the word even in front of the words more or better, everything changes.

So listen to that same statement again. This can help you earn even more money, which says you're financially successful. You're doing well financially, but there's still another level that you can get to. Well, this will help you get in better shape. This will help you get in even better shape. You're good now. But there's another level of fitness that you can achieve. And it gives your audience and listeners credit. And Sindra picked up on that right away. So when you look at your emails, counting those I's and U's in the first few paragraphs, look through your email, see if you've used the word even, I mean, the word better or more, and reread that typed out sentence in your email and mentally put the word even in front of more and better and watch how it changes what you said. And that's something you can use today because you're going to use those words better or more sometime this day. So does that make sense?

Absolutely. And I've used this the even more, even better in conversations with my family, with my kids. I have two teenage boys, you know, with my coaching clients. And I didn't even realize that maybe I was putting people down or making people feel bad that they, you know, hadn't earned enough money or didn't have enough confidence. But when you say like, you know, this will have you help you have even more confidence, then it's like, okay, they have the confidence already. But what would that look like if it was even more, you know, so it's so powerful and a small but really powerful tweak. Joel, you said something that I want to go back to because I think I want to reinforce

this with everybody listening. And you said you gave people need, fears, and victories. You call it the NFV. And what I've done since working with you is listed on my notes before I go on stage, their needs, fears, and victories, so that I have that in my mind and that I can work that into the conversation and my talks even more. How can we specifically use need, fears, and victories if we're a speaker, a professional speaker, or let's say we just want to influence people more in our sport or in our job?

Oh, that's great. Well, let's just talk about a team. Let's say you're speaking to a team. Maybe you're a coach or a player or a team leader. Well, let's say in your business, you're talking to your team, which be your associates, your employees, or those that you work with. It could be your suppliers as well. So in either of those cases, if you began by thinking about who is your audience and what do they need to know about the subject you're talking about. So let's use a business situation. Let's say you have 10 people on your team and you're talking about the next quarter coming up. So you finish the first, second or third quarter. You're going into the next quarter and you're talking about the plans for your business for the next quarter.

And normally what the ordinary leader says is, I'm so excited about the next quarter. Remember, no one cares. So the statement should be, you're here because you're part of XYZ and you just finished a wonderful quarter. Give yourself a big hand because you broke all kinds of records. Congratulations. The question is, what do we do in this next quarter so you're going to know in our time together all right so that opening even though these are people that know you and work with you all the time make it about them so if you had done before what cinderella does before every presentation before you did that team meeting, whether it's a sports

team or a business team, and you wrote down, all right, so the plan is talk about what's coming up in the near future. It could be in the team for the next game or a business for the next quarter. So what's coming up in the next situation of time? What do they need to know about that? Well, they need to know where we are now. They need to know if there are any changes coming up. They need to know if there's any additional things they weren't aware of. So make a list of those things. Then fears. Now, fears don't mean terrified like in an horror movie. Fears mean worry or concern or what keeps you up at night. That's a fear. So could that be, well, you know, how do we beat last quarter's or last team's victory?

I mean, that was unusual. I don't know if we can do that again. That would be a fear. Or maybe there's increased competition. Maybe the competitors are getting stronger and you're not, and that could be a fear or worry. Or maybe there's some changes in legislation. In sports, they make new rules. In business, they have new laws. Could be tax changes. Could be changes in interest rates. Those could be all the fears.

So needs, what do they need to know about the subject at hand? What are they concerned about when it comes to this next quarter or the next game? And then the victories, what's been working? What made that last quarter or the game victory so special? What gel, what were they already doing that you could help reinforce? And why Cintra likes that little NFV formula is because there's six words you're never going to hear if you have to talk to people. Are you ready for those six words as you're listening? I'm ready. You know what they are.

Talk as long as you want. No one is going to say that. Even if you run a business that is doing a team meeting, you can talk for weeks about what you know. But nobody wants to sit there and listen for weeks. If you're a speaker like Cinder and I are, nobody's ever said that to me in almost 50 years. Joel, get up there and talk as long as you want. You've got 10 minutes. You've got 20 minutes. You've got 30 minutes. You've got 45 minutes. It's a half hour meeting. We've got to get people back to work.

Okay. So because there's so much material you have in your mind, you know so much, you have such a passion for what you're doing. Your mindset is about your career and your business. How do you know what to talk about if you only have 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes? And that's where the NFVs come in. So what I've encouraged Sindhu to do and all the other people I work with is, the only thing you can talk about is something that meets a need the audience has or helps them overcome a fear or worry or concern. That you can talk about.

Or reinforces a victory, a success, or achievement that they've already had that we could use as we move forward. And that's the way that you create a message that so connects with an audience. And yet, as you think back to your experience listening to speakers, how many times have you been at a meeting and the speaker says, yes, you know, matter of fact, I just came back from a trip to Paris. I've never been to Paris before. And I don't know if you've ever been there, but when we saw the Eiffel Tower, no one cares. That is not relevant unless the team is going to Paris.

It's true. So that's how the NFV formula works. Does that sound good? Yeah, that sounds wonderful. And what I love about that focus, Joel, is that you're really thinking about the audience and what they need. What are their needs? What are their fears? What are their victories? And there's a lot of people who might ask me from a mindset perspective, you know, how I get really nervous before I speak. What do I do to really be more confident, really? Because that happens to a lot of people, you know, speaking is people's, sometimes people's number one fear is raising their hand or on them and not you? Because I know times where I've

been really nervous, it's usually it's self-focused where I'm worried about what they're going to think, are they going to like what I'm saying? But if you're using the needs, fears, and victories, you're focused on them. And also you're going to serve them more powerfully because you are thinking about them and not you, right? And so it's just going to be a more powerful talk, whatever you need to give. Hi, this is Cyndra Campoff and thanks for listening to the High Performance Mindset. Did you know that the ideas we share in the show

are things we actually specialize in implementing? If you want to become mentally stronger, lead your team more effectively and get to your goals quicker, visit freementalbreakthroughcall.com to sign up for your free mental breakthrough call with one of our certified coaches. Again, that's freementalbreakthroughcall.com to sign up for your free call. Talk to you soon. Absolutely. Well, you mentioned about the fear of speaking.

And Jerry Seinfeld, that wonderful comedian, had a great statement. He said, at a funeral, the person giving the eulogy would rather be in the coffin than standing up and speaking in front of the group. In other words, would be better than having to get up in front of a group. And that's why it's one of the top 10 fears of people is speaking in front of a group. But when you do what Cintra said, when you get yourself out of the way. So let me give you a metaphor of how that could work. As you're listening, just suppose that you're a paramedic and you're going to work. But instead of just a normal workday, it's a banquet they're having, and you're dressed up in your best clothes. Whether you're a man or woman, you're really

wearing beautiful clothes. You're driving to this event, and you're on a lonely road, and in front of you, you see an accident. Car is in a tree, and there's a person laying out in the road leading from a leg wound. And you're a paramedic. Now, what would you do? Would you just say, I'll call 911 because I'm going to a banquet? Or would you stop your vehicle and help? You would stop your vehicle and help. You would stop and help.

Absolutely. You're a paramedic. You know what to do. So you jump down out of your vehicle, rush over to this person, get on the ground, see this leg wound, take off a piece of your clothing, make some kind of your vehicle, rush over to this person, get on the ground, see this leg wound, take off a piece of your clothing, make some kind of a tourniquet, try to stop the blood. In the meantime, you're covered with their blood. You're down on the ground. You're getting all messed up. So here's the question for you. If that was actually happening, would you be thinking about your clothes or the shoes are getting scuffed up or my knees are on the ground

and I've got to go to this banquet, maybe I shouldn't be doing it. I don't think any of that would be in your mind. Your only thing you would be thinking about is, how do I stop this bleeding? I've got to save this person. Then I've got to call 911. But before I even do that, I'm going to stop this bleeding because they could bleed to death right now in front of me. And there would be no thought of your body, of your clothes, of the time involved. All of your focus would be on helping that accident victim stay alive. Would you concur with that? Cinder, you're the audience. Absolutely.

Yes. What if you had that mindset when you spoke? When you're in any group, all you're thinking about is how this is going to help them, how it's going to meet their needs, how it's going to help them overcome their fears and worries, how this is going to reinforce the things that they're doing so well that they can keep doing this, the mindsets involved in those achievements that they've had. And when you do that, you get

yourself out of the way. And that's the key to being an effective communicator, is forgetting yourself. It's not about you. It's not how you look. It's not how you sound. It's not what the audience is going to be thinking. It's about the ideas that are going to bless them, that are going to help them. And it's amazing when people make that switch, when they rated themselves on that 1 to 10 scale, a 1, 2, or 3, terrified of speaking, they realized that when they felt so uncomfortable, it's because they were thinking about themselves.

How am I going to look? How am I going to sound? What will they think of me? What if I forget something? What if I stumble? What if I forget something? What if I stumble? What if I start sweating? That's all self-directed. But when you make that mindset switch to it's about them, not about you, it's amazing the peace and the calm that can overtake you. And you have been in that state. When you are in an unselfish state, you feel so at peace because you're not thinking of you. You're thinking of them. Joel, there's a couple of things I want to share. I think about the research on flow and the flow state. And when you're thinking about your thinking that actually disrupts your flow. And when you're focused on the outcome, like, well, people like you, that disrupts your flow. And when you're focused on yourself, that also disrupts your flow.

So you're more likely to get in the flow state when you're focused on someone else. And the evidence I can give of this is there's a talk I was given to teachers last August, and it was about an hour drive for me. And I just thought about the teachers the whole hour on my drive. And when I got there, I was so much more connected to them because I had really tried to get in their needs, their fears, their victories, what was going on with them. And it was one of the most powerful talks I gave. And one of the things that I did to kind of get there, and I still do this before every talk, is I just put my hand on my heart as a way to kind of just get connected here, you know. And I think when we're focused on ourselves, we're in our head, we're questioning if we know what we're doing, we know we're

questioning if they're going to like us. When we're in our heart, we're connected more to our purpose and serving and giving. And so that's one of the things I do, you know, let's say a couple minutes before I go on is just hold it here. Cause that, that, that, um, that action reminds me to like, get focused on them and not me. It's so easy before you're going up there to be critical of yourself. And again, if you go by that sarcastic statement I made, no one cares. And especially if you get yourself out of the way, it means that you don't perform. And this is something that's taken over the world of Toastmasters. And I'm in Toastmasters for 54 years. So I love Tesla. But at the national level, it's become an acting school.

And you see people performing, doing gestures and music. Nobody talks like that. So here's another important thing for you to think of, of how do you speaking to build what you're creating and share those passions within you. Just be yourself. That's what I love about Cinder and the way she the same now as she was before we turned the camera on. There's no difference. And that's how you need to be. Just be you. Now, if you're an adult, which most likely you are watching this podcast, you have lived your life up to this point with yourself. There's no effort to be you.

If you're outgoing and happy and bubbly like Sindhret, that's how you are all the time. Now, you could be happy inside, but it doesn't show on the outside where you're more reserved. You're more of an introvert. It doesn't show on the outside. Like the guy that wins the lottery and he says yeah i just became a millionaire and i'm i'm very wealthy somebody said well you don't seem very excited well i am on the inside it just doesn't show on the outside you know people like that that no matter what they don't get excited how should you speak in front of an audience? Exactly like that. You should be you, no matter how that comes across, whether you have an accent, whether you have distracting habits about yourself. If you try to change all that, where are you focused? On yourself again. One of the things

Cinder mentioned was the importance of an introduction to set up the message and how she felt so much more connected when she had a great introduction. Another thing the introduction can do is prepare the audience with something about you that might not be perceived initially as a positive. As an example, many of my clients are from another country. So when they have English as a second language, that's in the introduction. Fred, English is his actually third language. He's originally from Romania, speaks Romanian and French,

and English is his third. So you're going to have to and French, and English is disturbed. So you're going to have to pay attention and you're not going to catch all the words. But if you at least get half of what he says, you're going to be so much better when it comes to X, Y, Z. Okay. Afterwards, when we've added that to his introduction, people would come up and say, you know, I can understand everything you said. It wasn't that difficult.

Right. How many times have you heard like an Englishman talk and you think, oh, what are they from England? Maybe they're Australian. No, they could be South African. Maybe they're from New Zealand. I think you're thinking about all the wrong things. So in the introduction would say, Margo is from Sydney, Australia. Okay, we don't think about it anymore. She might say shrimp on the barbie a few times and mate. So just understand if she throws a few Australian words in, then it's anticipated. Now you might say, well, that's pretty good for that. But what about the worst kind of speaker? And Cydra, if you were to make a list of what makes the worst speaker, dull, boring, and monotone. And arrogant. I don't like arrogant speakers.

Arrogant, okay. That's what I was adding. But arrogant might just hold your attention. Dull, boring, and monotone might put you to sleep or get you to go onto your cell phone. So let me give you a story. And the point of this story is how important it is to be you. And the story is called Boring Bob. Many years ago, I was the closing speaker at a three-day event of a Fortune 500 company. It was their national sales meeting. And I sat in the audience because I was in just about three in the afternoon to four, and then they all had to go to the airport, and I was going to close out the event. So I was there for the whole meeting. I did a little part on the opening day and then did the ending. And as I'm sitting there,

the president of the company sitting next to me, who's going to introduce me, says, this is the worst part of the meeting. I'm sorry you have to sit through this, but this is our financial report. Our chief financial officer, Bob, is going to be up there, and he's the worst speaker you ever saw. Everybody falls asleep. It's terrible. But he's the only one that knows these numbers and we got to get him up there.

And, oh, I wish there's something you could do to help. So Bob gives his presentation. And sure enough, he was dull, boring, and monotone. And he says to me, there was a little break. He said, Joe, can you help him? He's got to do this every year. Would you coach him this year? I said, well, if he's open for it, I'm open. So basically, later that year, I get in touch with Bob. He's preparing for the national sales meeting. And he said, so you're going to fix me? I said, no. He said, what do you mean?

The president said, I've got to make the presentation and he hired a speech coach. I said, no, I want you to do exactly what you did every year, with two exceptions. Let me write the introduction the president used and let me give you your opening statement. He said, sure, that's it. I said, yeah, do everything the same. You mean I can walk out there with my notebook, look down and not look at the audience and just read numbers? I said, yeah, that's fine. He said, okay. So does this make any sense to you at this point? Probably not. I mean, he's dull, boring, and monotone. So here's basically the gist of the opening, not word for word.

So the president gets up, says, all right, this is the part of the meeting that nobody looks forward to. This is our numbers part. We're almost finished with a three-day meeting, and our chief financial officer, Bob, is going to give you all the numbers for the year, and everybody falls asleep. Because Bob is boring. Matter of fact, at the corporate office, we call him Boring Bob. If you put the dictionary under the word boring, you would see Bob's picture. If you've ever talked to him, you know he is monotone and boring. However, the numbers are so critical for you this year as they are every year. So that's why he does this closing session. But we have some new rules, boy. Rule number one, if you're in the audience and the person next to you starts

falling asleep, it is your job to wake them up and nudge them, because they got to listen to these notes. Now, for those in the front row, and then I wrote on the introduction, point to every person in the front row. And then the president goes, for those of you in the front row, and he goes all the way through that, points to everybody, your job is if Bob falls asleep while he's talking, you have to run on stage and wake Bob up. Well, by now the audience is asleep. And Bob comes out with his notebook, looking down to the lectern, puts the notebook on the on the top of the lectern and they give him a standing ovation.

Oh, wow. And he says, well, thank you for that. I know some of you know that Evelyn and I have been married for 27 years, but on our first date, she slapped me. I wasn't fresh. She just thought I was dead. The audience goes ballistic. And then he says, and this was the part I wrote for him. He said, you know, I wasn't dead, but I know I look like I'm dead. As I stand up here, I know I'm boring and I'm monotone,

but these numbers are the key to your year. So based on the means of working word, please nudge the person next to you if they start falling asleep. And those in the front room, you might be running up here to wake me up because I just get tired from doing this. And he gave the same presentation he'd always done he got a standing ovation at the end and on critiques he was the highest rated speaker for for that meeting oh wow loved it i kept in touch with them for about eight or nine years. And every year the president would write, he's never changed anything. He's always the same boring Bob. Every year he works on boring jokes.

He is so smart. He figured out that's the key. And he creates these boring stories of how boring he actually is. And they love it. And he's still the highest rated speaker every year by being dull, boring, and monotone. Now, what does that mean for you? Not that you have to be dull, boring, and monotone. You can be yourself. Just let the audience know that, like Bob said, I don't let it show on the outside.

He said that I was excited on the inside, but't let it show on the outside. He said that I was excited on the inside, but it doesn't show on the outside. And you know people like that. So if there's anything that can distract, just bring it up. But being yourself, it's not a performance. It's a connection act. And if you can connect with your audience, it's amazing what can happen.

Love it. Thank you, Joel. Not a performance, but a connection act. Really powerful. And as people are listening, I think what you just shared is so impactful for them because sometimes people will come up to me and say, well, I'm not as dynamic as so-and-so or I'm not, you know, I don't smile as much as you do on stage or whatever it might be. And I love what you just said about be yourself. And it's about the introduction. And I love that he's been adding in jokes about himself, you know, and such a powerful story. One of the things I'm thinking about is, you know, when people are speaking, stories is a way for them to connect, right?

So we just heard this wonderful story that you gave. Tell us a little bit about how we should pick the stories that we decide to deliver and what tips might you have about storytelling? Okay, well, that's a great question. Well, the stories you would pick would have to do with the needs, fears, and victories. So the story I picked about boring Bob was to make the point about you being yourself as you're listening to this podcast, to be yourself. Notice when I started that story, I told you the point. Yes. The point of this story, it always opened with the point of the story. There's a tendency for speakers to say, so there I was, not a national

sales meeting. No one cares. But when they know the point of the story is on how they can be themselves, and this is a metaphor, an example, what you can do. So that's where the story comes in. And then if you could put them in there, did you feel when I pointed to people in the front row that were sitting in that meeting? And I mean, you're looking up at the stage, seeing this boring guy hiding behind a lectern with a big notebook of numbers. I could picture it. You could picture it. So that's the key to that part is doing it. But I think we also should talk about how to end any message. If the opening is about them, you're here because, and eliminating the I's, making it the U's. How do you end a

message? Well, usually there's a call to action. So if you're doing that team meeting, let's say. So the call to action would be, here are our numbers for the next quarter. Here's our plan to get there. We're going to increase our advertising. We're going to do this. We're going to do it. That's the call to action. So your job is to embrace that and put as much effort as you can and let's end this quarter even better than the last quarter. But that should not be the end of the message. That's where most ordinary speakers end on a call to action. But what if you ended beginning with the word picture or imagine? And now you painted a picture of what your audience's life would be like when they've done the call to action. So let's go back to that team meeting of yours.

So you've given them the call to action. Then you say, imagine. Yesterday was the end of the fourth quarter. And you saw the numbers. And you and your teammates finished higher than ever. It was a record-breaking year. Not only has your bonus been larger, but you had that sense of satisfaction of doing amazing things

that have never been done before in this entire company's history. And you feel so excited about what you've done. That's what can happen when you implement those three ideas. Now let's go out and make this the best fourth quarter ever. Bam. In other words, end any message by painting a picture of what their life would be like if they did what you said. So here's maybe a great example.

Let's say your message was on fitness and to get into great shape. And you've talked about all these things. And the call to action is stop eating junk, exercise every day, hang around with fit people. And that's the call to action. Then you say, now picture this. It's three months in the future. You just step out of the shower. You pass a full length mirror and you look at yourself standing there naked and you smile for the first time in years. All that excess fat is gone. You've had more energy in the last few months than you've ever had. People are stopping you, telling you how good you look and how fit you look.

And you have so much energy during the day. How did all of that happen for you? Because you stopped eating junk. You exercised every day day and you hung around with fit people now go out and claim that body within you end it with putting them in that picture of whatever it is the call to action was about you like that is it a standard ending picture or imagine and you can't go wrong and it's all about your audience and the benefits they get from the wisdom that you shared and they're going to be more inspired because you left them with something that they could think about and that's going to

actually motivate them and inspire them to action is by using that imagine idea or picture. You know, one of the things I'd never done before, Joel, is to tell the people the point of the story before the story. And I think that's so powerful because I was listening to a speaker a couple weeks ago and he was telling a story, but I didn't really even get the point of the story. And then at the end, I was like, what was the point of the story. And then at the end, I was like, what was the point of the last 10 minutes of the story? I don't know,

because he never told the point. But if he told the point right up to the beginning, it would have helped me follow the story a lot better and then think about how I could relate to the story. Well, you're bringing up another point. I'm sure in the speaker's mind, he knew the point of the story. And that's part of the challenge that most ordinary speakers have is they think like a speaker, but you have to think like your audience and the audience doesn't know what you know. So you need to make things impossible to be misunderstood. One way of doing that, one of the tools in our system is to find your terms and to find people. So in the introduction, you mentioned about Warren Buffett.

All right. Who is Warren Buffett? Warren Buffett said, if you just said that, but you prefaced that or followed that with, considered the number one investor ever and one of the richest men in the world. Oh, that Warren Buffett, or I didn't know about him, but sounds pretty good. So that's one of the tools to make sure that you don't fall into the trap like that speaker who told the story and nobody got the point because if you didn't get it, I'm sure nobody else got it. Mm-hmm. He knew the point or she knew the point and they assumed the audience would get it. You can't assume the audience knows what

you know. So set up a story or an example with the sure that it is relevant to the message or the point that you're going to, which would be your call to action. One of the things, Joel, that I'm relating to is I just did this 10-minute talk about how to move on from a mistake that was so fun to work with you on, and I was really happy with how it went. And one of the suggestions you provided was to define a mistake. And I'd never thought about defining a mistake because people know what a mistake is. But, you know, I assumed that. But I think it just made the message more clear when I defined what it is. And so, you know, defining who Warren Buffett is or whoever you might say, even if you said someone. And so, you know, defining who Warren Buffett is or whoever you

might say, even if you said someone like Joe Biden, you know, you might think that everybody knows who Joe Biden is, but maybe people- The current president of the United States, Joe Biden was quoted- Right. Was something like that. And even like you said about the word mistake, if you ask 10 people to define mistakes, you would get a varying answer on that. But by you giving that definition in the beginning, everybody was on the same page now. So that's how you preface it. Say, let's define a couple of our terms.

I know you know them, but let's make sure we're on the same page. So here's our working definition for mistakes. Yeah. And once Sindra said that, we all were on common ground, and it was impossible to be confused what she was saying because she had just told us what we're dealing with. So that's a great reminder. And one of the tools in our system to make your connection even better with your own. Excellent. Well, I know I could talk to you all

day, Joel, and listen to the advice and strategies you have. I want one question, one more question, then we'll wrap up. And one of the mistakes I made one time is I memorized a talk. And it didn't go so well for me because I was very connected to my head, not my heart. And it was too robotic. And so as people are listening, they might say, well, gosh, how do I grow in this? How do I use maybe prompts or how do I use notes if I don't memorize things? And your recommendation would be not to memorize it, which I appreciate because memorizing hasn't helped me. So what is your recommendation on how to use notes and prompts, and why should we not memorize a talk word for word? Okay, so the reason not to memorize is that...

The reason not to memorize is that... One point set. The reason... Have you ever seen... So I'm looking for that word. What comes next? This is a word I've got to... That's why you should never memorize it.

Very few people are good at memorizing. Some people can, but it's not recommended. You just need to have a track. And that's what slides do. Slides become your keyword notes of where you're going. Or you can use, as you know, we've talked about that, a black card of notes. You know, we're going to talk about this next quarter and what's going to happen. And I jotted down 10 things that we're going to cover in the meeting. All right. Nobody's going to hold you in fall for that. So the suggestion is always have a note. It could be simply a flip chart, which could have the items on it just to keep you on track. But the most important thing is that you know what their needs are, their fears, their victories, and that you're going to connect everything you say to their situation. And if you forget something or miss something, it's okay.

Nobody knows. They don't have a script. It's not like a play where your key word is agriculture and then somebody says the next word. That's why you don't need to memorize things. But you need to be familiar. You need to have a track. So slides become a great way to do that. A printed handout. You can have the 10 things on a printed handout if it's a team member.

We're going to talk about advertising. We're going to talk about marketing, price increase, competition, suppliers, whatever that is. And you say, okay, so we're on idea number five, which is supplier. You should know if you are running the meeting, what you're going to say about suppliers. And maybe on that sheet of yours, you could have a price increase, delivery delays, past problems solved, and you would know what to say. So does that make sense? That makes complete sense. And I think that's really practical that people can use. So Joel, first of all, thank you so much for bringing, bringing, you know, bringing your ideas and being on today and just with your energy and your passion. I love it. And you're always learning and you're always growing and always serving. So

thank you so much. And I want you to share with people about your ultimate speaking system, how you work with people. If people were listening and said, you know, I need to have Joel as my speaking coach. And I would give you a great recommendation and say, absolutely, you should have Joel as your speaking coach. It's helped me level up my own speaking and my own influence. So tell us how people can reach out to you and the type of people that you work with. Okay, well, you're the type of people I work with, not because you're a professional speaker, but because you're a communicator. You work with professional athletes. You work with businesses. Anytime, as you can see

the sign above me, using speaking to grow your business. If you are out communicating and doing interviews and videos, that's what this ultimate speaking system can do. And there's really two options. We have the one-on-one coaching, which I do with which is very limited. I only take a couple of people every month and I'm so blessed to have her because she's such a joy to work with. As you can tell from this podcast, she's just such a sponge for material and implements it right away. And it's very different. If you've ever had a coach, you get a certain number of hours of time. I don't do that. So once Cintra hired me, we never count hours. We don't have time. She has me

forever. As long as I'm alive and working, she can use me. And then, of course, you can look at me and see that I'm not 20 years old. She has a one-year guarantee that she has me at least for a full year. And at the end of that year, we just keep going and you never pay another penny. So one-time investment. I love that. And you can use me as much as you want. The other part is we have all of these tools, videos, audios, random materials created, and a short way to create a new talk called Quick Start. And that's an online program. It's a lifetime membership too. It keeps growing and adding on. Again, you make a one-time investment and you have it forever.

And my two daughters work in my business, Jenny and Jill. And Jenny is my partner and a professional speaker. And then we do monthly group coaching calls, which is included in the special offer for the Ultimate Speaking System. And you can just go to our website, ultimatespeaker.com, ultimatespeaker.com. And then there's a way to schedule a call with me if you're serious about the one-on-one. Then we can talk for 15 minutes or a half hour about your situation and see if it really would be a good fit for you. Wonderful. So ultimatespeaker.com. Yes. Go ahead, Joel. Keep going. UltimateSpeaker.com. Wonderful. So ultimatespeaker.com. Yes. Go ahead, Joel. Keep going. Speaker.com. Yeah. Excellent. Well, thank you so much for being on today. There's so many things that I continue to learn from you. I love what you talked about is, you know, you're the NFV

needs, fears, and victories. Today, we talked about how to tell a story and how to start your talk, how to end your talk. And you gave some great ideas about the introduction, what that might look like. Using the even more often is really a great point. So what final advice or ideas do you have to close us off today, Joel? You know what's going to happen next. I've got to say, imagine. Imagine you're giving your next presentation. And as you've been listening, you've been taking some notes. And you know how to open and make it about them. You know how to end it. And you followed some of these suggestions and tools from the Ultimate Speaking System.

And you get such great results. And you feel so good about yourself. And in the toolbox that you have gotten, Sindra, on page 148, is a summary of everything it's taken me almost 50 years to learn about speaking. Yes. And on 148 are these 22 words. And here are the 22 words for you as you're listening. Are you ready? I'm ready. Speak to your audience about what they need in an organized way they can follow

and get yourself out of the way. Now go out and make it a great day. Way to go for finishing another episode of the way. Now go out and can add over to Dr. Sindhra. That's D-R-C-I-N-D-R-A.com. See you next week.