History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 125 - Eminem is WILD!

Episode Date: March 1, 2020

The Cuzzies close out Black History month going wild on the current appropriation of black culture and get into the bio of one Marshall Mathers aka Eminem!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

what's up cuzzy wuzzies you the history of hyenas i'm chris stefano aka chrissy cauliflowers with me yannis papas aka yannis yaya hair so i've i've i've cleaned that up i've fixed it you got a haircut listen first things first let me have it i said my yaya's outside i thought you were her for a second yo i'm gonna handle some business right now listen you fucking freaks march 19th grammar sea theater new york city first show is sold out second show tickets are moving so go get them uh it's going to be a totally different show from the first show grammarcy theater march 19th live history ahinas then we have a second show april 29th uh wall street theater norwalk connecticut tickets are moving there go to historyahinas.com or

christycomedy.com or yannispoppitscomedy.com um i also uh do you have any more do you have any dates in march any other no just thank you to whoever came out of uncle vinny's and let's just let's just see if this new agent gets it cooking again he's got a fat face yeah um so uh yeah my i got fuck you to my old agent fuck you to the old agent so come see us in march uh apr. I just want to let you guys know real quick. Go to Christie comedy.com. I got Vancouver, Indianapolis,

Boston and Newark, New Jersey. So please come see baby gorgeous performing. Oh, and then we also just added Raleigh, North Carolina. So Christie comedy.com, please get your tickets.

I love cock. Cause I mean, I, you might be the only comedian who's hit Newark, New Jersey a few times in a row. You got a big following in Newark, New Jersey. I keep adding shows at NARC. Are you crushing all cities that used to be crushing it? Cuz, you know what it is with this new chair?

I like this new chair. Go to downtown Detroit to see Chrissy. I like this new chair. It doesn't go up and down. The other office chair, I could push up and down so it would be like I'm sitting on a cock and that would spur me into new bits. But now I feel like I'm just sitting in a chair and it doesn't move.

And I hate it. But at least I have to move the mic. At least we got a normal chair and I mean, Veneti is just going with the winter hat look inside because she looks like she's a greeter at Urban Outfitters I'm just happy Mike Mush can breathe today I'm just we just want to make sure that those

two are at peace because make no mistake they're like Israel and Palestine sometimes yeah yeah yeah they are they're both moody little bitches no I think Mike's more the moody one. And I can understand that.

I'm a little moody, too. Yeah. I just don't scream at people. Yeah, you just don't scream. But Giannis, you're a dick. Yeah, I can be a little bit of a dick. Yeah. No, listen, guys.

We're doing two episodes. We've left Ryan Cash. We're on Barstool. We're leaving. We signed a big deal. You're cut, truffle pig. Everyone's getting a cut. You can't sue us because you never signed anything. Yeah, cuz.

We got scissors and we're making cuts. You're getting cut. Everybody's getting cut. My age, you better get off your ass because you're next. Yeah, and when you get into your car and if you see a red little tag hanging, means goodbye. Cuz, make no mistake, I'm leaving my lease of my Jeep Grand Cherokee three months early.

I'm going to pay a fee and I'm just going to get myself into a BMW X5. It's what it is. You're a German and you just got to get into a German. You're just hopping into that German love sack. I want to get into a fucking German car, but I want you to know it's a German car that's drove by black guys, so it's perfect for me. That's right. Max and Stubitz. That's right.

Max and Stubitz. We right. Max and Steuben. We talked about their origin story on the last episode. So basically, if you guys don't know, Max and Steuben are characters that, they're German guys. They're Bavarian guys. They're Bavarian guys. They met, actually, they were Hitler youth soldiers. Yeah, they're characters from the 50s and they're Bavarians, so they were forced to be Nazis. But deep down, they were both FFs. Yeah, they're characters from the 50s and the Bavarians, so they were forced to be Nazis, but deep down they were both FFs.

But everybody had to pretend, Mark, that they wanted to be part of the killing machine. But here's the thing. Marx looked at Stubbins and Stubbins looked at Marx. And we could just see the twinkle in each other's eyes because one person with sugar in the tank sees somebody else. Sugar in the tank's a tank. And he knows

that he has sugar in the tank. So one day, they was in Auschwitz, and they was supposed to be working, moving people down the lines. And Marx looks at Steubert, and Steubert looks at Marx. And there was a twinkle. And then they went behind the bar, and they went behind the building, and they said, hi.

And he said, hi. And he said, do you love black guys? And he said, how did you know? He said, I see it in your eyes. And he said, hi. And he said, do you love black guys? And he said, how did you know? I said, I see it in your eyes. And he said, uh-uh, we should sneak off. And so they defected from the Nazi army and they went to the hills of France, even though Auschwitz is in Poland because reality is a suggestion. And they ate stinky French cheese and wine and they fucked. But they realized they were just friends and their connection was more because they love black guys.

And they love black guys. And that's the story of Max and Stupid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. There are two people who are just bigger than Germany. Yeah. We had bigger dreams than Nazi Germany. Yeah.

Strudel and sausage wasn't enough. We wanted to eat fine wine and cheese and we wanted to fuck black guys. They didn't want to fuck black guys. It's what it is. Es lo que es. It's what it is. And then they would go to find black guys. What they would do is they would go wait outside magic shows and they would wait for the big trick and they watch the black guys

run out they try to suck all their dick and they try to catch him like a fisherman yeah the black guys black guys like to run out of magic yeah um so what can you do but listen um yeah because when you see black guys running you don't know if it if there's a cop behind him or someone just did a magic i don't know yeah you just never really know you never really know you never know what's going on yeah so let me just okay so i figured something first of all your shirt is gay well i was just gonna say first of all i figured out i figured out i was listening to the 1975 um and that's my favorite band and what i love about their music and what i love about them is they're just unapologetic for who they are and they don't play by any real rules. Yeah.

Every song is so different. I mean, their lead singer comes out one day wearing a tutu. Then one day he's wearing a suit. Then one day he shaves his head and then he glues his hair back on his head. And he's just wild. And you don't. Sounds like Yanni. Yeah.

And you don't expect you don't expect them to be like that when you see them. And I think that that's who I am and why I identify so much with the 1975. Because that's just what it is like today i'm wearing a shirt that says yep comma i'm gay and i'll just wear it loud and proud but i'm not gay yeah but i wear the shirt that says it and i actually don't care what you think of me at all because i just feel comfy wonky in the shirt yeah and i just feel comfy wonky in my decisions and i think that that's what the 1975 do and i think that's why i like them yeah and also the lead singer uh said yesterday on his social media that he's looking for a guy to kiss and i'm gonna be that guy yeah they're coming to madison square garden in may and i swear to fucking christ i'm gonna get my lips on matt healy's fucking lips you understand that the things you want to do are gay things yeah but you keep saying you're not gay right you got a shirt got a shirt that says, yep, I'm gay.

Yeah. I feel like I'm in a Bad Will and Grace episode with you. Yeah. It's like the whole plot is like you realize you're gay, turn it around. You remember that movie with Kevin Kline where he's just slowly realizing he's gay because he likes show tunes and he goes to certain concerts. And he still goes to certain concerts. Cackle alert! Yeah!

Cackle alert, and we're back. Listen, it's the last week of Black History Month. Yeah, and you're a gay man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's the last week of Black History Month. So I thought it would be, well, we thought as a group here that-

Are you just farting in front of Venetia now? Because make no mistake, this weekend you were just letting them rip, and they were horrible. They were wet. And Chrissy Wellfarts was back in full effect. Chrissy Wellfarts was back. I had no choice but to fart in front of Venetia. I had to let the cum out.

Is that why they're wet? Yeah. Wait a second. They all got a little sperm in them. Because it took two years. It's been a while since we talked about Chrissy Wellfarts. Chrissy Wellfarts. And that goes more in your theory with different eras that I have.

Because Chrissy Wellfarts sounds like a lifetime ago. Yeah. And it was really just a few months ago. It was a few months ago. But, you know, you stopped farting. And then this weekend, Venetia was in there and you just broke the seal. Like, you were farting a lot in the green room and your farts sound like they're underwater. But now you've revealed the reason. It's because there's cum in there. It's what it is.arts sound like they're underwater. But now you reveal the reason.

It's because there's cum in there. It's what it is. That's why they're wet. They got a little sugar in them. Yeah. If there's one person in this world you can fart in front of, it's your wife. Yeah. I fart in front of my wife.

Yeah. Venetia is long gone for any hope or chance you have, buddy. Well, no. Yeah. With Venetia, it's just a waiting game. Because you're just destined to be with somebody who walks their check to Banco Popular.

It's what it is. I'm back with my baby's mom. It's what it is. It's what it is. I had a nice little Middle Eastern piece in the green room. You did. Yeah, you did. And Veneti was giggling when she was watching you flirt. It was hilarious. Yeah. Yeah. And thenity was giggling when she was watching you flirt. It was hilarious. Yeah. Yeah.

And then watching you lie about why you couldn't hang out with her that night was my joy on the night home. It's what it is. Yeah, because when Chrissy's canceling plans, you're going to hear a lot of two words. You know what those two words are? Take a guess. The baby. Don't. Let me let her guess. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

The baby or the phone complication. No, you're going to hear a variation of the same word. I'll give you a hint. It's a variation of the same word. Two versions of the same word. You're going to hear over and over again when Chrissy is canceling plans with a dude. Give me, give me, give me. You got one.

Baby's definitely one. And what's the other one? Something about schedule? No. Babe. You're going to hear a lot of babe. Yeah. You're going to hear a lot of babe. Yeah. You're going to hear a lot of baby.

Yeah. It's going to be babe, babe, babe. I'm sorry. I got to beat the baby. The baby's on the trunk. It's going to be B-A-B-I or B-A-B-E. It's going to be a lot of those. Yeah, babe.

I got to take the baby to Afghanistan. What do you mean, babe? She's got swimming lessons too. The baby's underneath the car. I got to get her by. Yeah, I was on the cruise. I was on the cruise in the middle of the ocean, and I got a girl out of my room. I said, I got to go get the baby. Now, what cruise are you on? We're in the middle underneath the car. I got to get her by. Yeah, I was on the cruise. I was on the cruise in the middle of the ocean, and I got a girl out of my room.

I said, I got to go get the baby. Now, what cruise were you on? We were in the middle of the Atlantic. Were you on Rosie O'Donnell's cruise? The impractical cruise. I just got lightheaded. Do I have heart problems? I almost went down. Sorry.

No, I seriously almost went down. Sorry. Is that a problem? You're fucking yada yada down. Sorry. Sorry. No, I seriously almost went down. Sorry. Is that a problem? Or is that – was that a – Your fucking yada yada hair. Yeah. Wait. So, Chrissy, when I feel like I'm almost going to go down, I'm funny.

And my blood – that's just a blood pressure spike? Yeah, it's a blood pressure – is that a problem? The blood pressure goes up. It means you got to go get a cookbook and cook for your husband. Yeah, my hair was a problem. I look like I was wearing an old woman's wig. Yeah, when you walked into Panache Barbershop at Bay Ridge, Stefano was texting me. He's like, I can't believe this kid's walking around with his hair like that.

He wanted to cut your hair immediately. Yeah. He didn't even want you in the barbershop with your hair like that. Now you look good. He said I look like his great yaya. Yeah, your great yaya. Listen to me guys so we thought for the last week of namin month black history month which has been very successful because of you guys the fans

thank you so much we've had great great great uh black people have done great amazing things in history uh harriet tubman marvin gay uh george washington carver recently garrett morgan who mike cannon who should be more famous and then then last but not least, we thought the best way to end Black History Month would be someone who's done the most for the black community, Eminem. That's what we're going to do. We're going to end it with Eminem because he's

white. And then we're going right into fucking Women's Month. We're going right into Women's Month. And we're going to start with RuPaul. Yeah, we're going to start with RuPaul. And Maurice the Next. Women's Month. Yeah. March is Women start with RuPaul. Yeah, we're going to start with RuPaul. And Marisa next. Women's month. Yeah. March is women's month, so we've got a lot to look forward to on that. Yeah, and we're going to just, yeah, we're going to start

we're going to start off nice, but we're going to end Black History Month with Eminem, who you guys know. His real name is Marshall Mathers. He's a rapper. And he's a squeak. Is he a squeak? He's a squeak. Eminem squeak. He a squeak he's borderline squeak he's like five six wait the kid five he's 47 years old already eminem yeah or they're just getting old huh yeah

the rappers are just getting old yeah but you know what he's what's wild is he's he's probably the best rapper you think which is what like is, like, skills-wise, him, Rakim. Nas, right? Nas is very good. I mean, you can't be considered the best rapper of all time and have Jay-Z just end your career in a rap battle, even though maybe you're better than Jay-Z. Right, right, right.

Because, like, you know, Jay-Z definitely won the rap battle and the career war, but you got to say, Nas definitely won the commercial voiceover war. What? He does commercial voiceovers now. For who? I think it was for Hennessy. Oh, wow.

So that's where he's at now. That's not good. Wow, that's shocking. Yeah, that's not good for a great rapper. You know, he's just doing commercial. He's doing a lot of commercial voiceover work. Well, the kid's making money. Yeah, he's basically TJ Del Reno.

TJ Del Reno does not make money. He wanted to sleep on my couch last week. I know, but he did a couple of Verizon commercials. No, TJ Del Reno is great. Go follow TJ Del Reno on social media. He's great. Yeah, so Eminem, he's a little bit of a squeak. Yeah.

He's squeak-ish. He's a squeaky. And I think for Women's Month, wouldn't it be funny if we just did, we tried to contact all the trans women who recently transitioned and won female sports? Let me ask you a question. I think that would be a great way to celebrate Women's Month. Right? Because we're all women.

Right, Vinny? Yes. Yes. It's gender. I know that gender is a construct. But it's nationality. Could you come out and say, I don't want to be Italian Irish anymore. I want to be Swahili.

Well, this is an honest question. I'm not poking fun at him. I'm asking what the truth is. Ask Sean King. Right. Yeah. Ask Sean King. We should have done Sean King.

Here's the thing. Here's the thing. He does a lot of good work. But let's just can we not pretend for five seconds that that is not a white kid? Can we pull up a picture? He is a, pull up a baby picture of Sean King and then pull up a baby picture of me. Actually, I posted on my Instagram. Can you find the picture that I posted where it's a split screen of me as a baby and Sean King as a baby?

It's on my Instagram. If you scroll back. I want to see Sean King. Sean King. Without the shape up. So he's. His mother's white. His brothers are white.

But is his father black? His dad on his birth certificate is white. He looks like his dad on his birth certificate. But does he say that he's black? He grew up in a white family. He says that his mom. This is how I know he's white. He says his mom had an affair with a very light skinned black man.

I think by very light skinned, he means white. White. light-skinned black man. I think by very light-skinned, he means white! White! Yeah, some mysterious, very light-skinned black man his mom had an affair with out of wedlock or something, and that's why he is like 10% black or whatever like that. Well, just pull up Sean King.

I just want to see Sean King. Yeah, he may have a little black in him, but he definitely was raised in a white family looking white. And he definitely chose blackness, which is fine. Yeah, I guess you could be transracial. But that's my point. It's like, he's doing good things for the community, which is great. I think it's different than...

But I just don't... I think it's different for trans because trans, I think people, you're born just feeling like you're a different gender. Yeah, I mean, he looks black in this. I could see how he's black in this picture, though, in these pictures. But you're saying as a baby. He does a nice thing with the shape up and the thing. Go look at pictures of him as a kid before he cuts his hair that way. Yeah, all right.

Well, I would guarantee, I guarantee he's 100 percent white. Wait, do you see that? Go to the baby picture. See the baby pictures down towards the right. I mean, Mike, it's right up there. The second to the left of the top row. Top row. Second to the left.

Oh, right there. Right there. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. Second to the left. There you go. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

Yeah. There we go, Papa. No, really? I'm black. Yeah. No. He looks like a. That's him as a kid.

He looks like me when I was a kid. He does. He does look like me as a kid. What can you do? I mean, look at his hair. Look at him. He's a white kid. Right.

I mean, that is a white kid. I'm sorry. People go, hey, Thurgood Marshall. It's like, yeah, there's a few, but like even Thurgood Marshall. Wait, what's up with Thurgood Marshall? Thurgood Marshall was black, but. No, I know he's black. I'm just saying he had kind of whitish hair because that happens once in a while.

Like Colin Powell, but Colin Powell had kinky hair. I mean, black people, for the most part, African-Americans are mostly mixed. I'm just saying when it comes to Sean King, I think we got a situation. We got a little bit of an Elizabeth Warren situation. Look, this is something that has happened recently. It's like there's a cultural phenomenon. You can't deny it. And those were a couple of examples of like white people claiming they were something else for kind of cultural

points you can't deny it elizabeth warren did it elizabeth warren pretended she was a little bit fucking native american right she did because she wanted points she wanted those votes and and and and in yesteryear when she was applying she wanted scholarships or whatever or she wanted those cool points or whatever it is because it's become kind of cool to say like – As long as you're not straight and white, everything else is good. That's why I'm wearing a t-shirt that says yep, gay. She got caught lying. Elizabeth Warren has no Native American in her. She admitted it.

She apologized for it. But it was a fucking lie. Yeah. Rachel Dolezal pretended to be black. She pretended. She lived as a black woman. She became president of a fucking local chapter of an NAACP. It's hilarious.

It's hilarious. The documentary is hilarious. Turns out she's a 100% white woman. But it doesn't negate the things that she did. The things she did are great. Sean King, who is one of the founders of Black Lives Matter, right, has done a lot of great work. Cuts his hair. Looks like a very light-skinned black man, took an Oprah scholarship for a black person

and went to Morehouse, I believe. That's a problem. And here's the deal. Yeah, that's the issue then. His birth certificate was found. Regardless of who found it, some fucking alt-right media, whatever it is, the truth is his birth certificate,

and we're talking about this a yobby month because we're wild, but the truth is, the truth is, Ven certificate, and we're talking about this because we're wild, but the truth is, the truth is I'm sorry if you feel uncomfortable because you're a millennial but the truth is his birth certificate says his father is this white kid named something king, I don't remember and you look at the picture of the kid and you're like, that kid

looks exactly like his son! That's what it is, Venetia, so tell fucking Lil Nas X or whatever the hell you listen to, write a song about it but then he said, you know, what happened was my mom, he goes, my mom had an affair with this, I was born through an affair with this very very, this mysterious, very, very

light-skinned black guy, who he's never giving a name for. I know there's some people listening going, Yanni, you're wild? Okay, how wild am I? Why doesn't he just ask his mom what the guy's name is? So at least people can go, hey, can we find your son? Or after you've become famous, don't you think some kid might come around like Shaq's dad and be like, hey, can I get a couple of dollars? Yeah, because they're lying.

Yeah. But who is this mysterious? And why did he refer to him as a very light skinned black guy? Yeah. I mean, how do you know? Were you there? Were you there? Is that how your mom described it?

It's so fucking transparent and hilarious. I don't know. I mean. The millennials, the millennials, they'll deal with it. If Ace Boogie would a hoodie write the song about it, they're in. Yeah, because we're in an era where details and research is just too much work. The truth requires work. So I just want to fucking say an emotional slogan.

Yeah. I just want to fucking say an emotional slogan. Yeah. Professor, if you fucking say anything contrary to what my fucking emotional reaction is to this history that we're reading, you're fucking racist. You're canceled. Benity is like, I'm cold. Let me put my hat on, but also no socks. Yeah, also, and please lay off the fucking, yeah, no socks, but a winter hat.

She's like, my ankles will be out, but my scalp will be warm. Yeah. It's just what it is. I'm a millennial ankles will be out, but the scalp will be warm. Yeah. It's just what it is. I'm a millennial. It don't make sense. I'm woke. I'm dope. Sean King's black.

Yeah, Sean King's fucking black. One more thing, Mikey, for Yamima. Because I'm doing this. Black people should be pissed. And in actuality, a lot are. Good. A lot. When you go to Twitter, I love going to black Twitter and following the Sean King shit. Because a lot of them are fucking odd to him

but it's complicated because it's a gray zone thing because he does a lot of great work Mikey can you Google his brother Sean King's brother now you tell me Chrissy yeah you tell me I want to see Sean King's brother you tell me yeah I'm gay is a shirt I'm wearing I'm safe to say whatever I want because I am gay and then

and then while we move on one of you guys has to find when I split screened me and Sean King because we actually look like the same kid. And I swear to God, just go through my Instagram and find it. But first go to Sean King's brother. This episode is about Eminem now. We will get there. Yeah, but in honor of the history of Eminem. In honor of Eminem, we're finding all the guys

who are white. What are we looking for? Sean King's brother? Sean King's brother. Picture Sean King's brother. Is that him with the beard? I mean, that's not him. Yeah, Sean King's right there. Right's brother. Picture Sean King's brother. Is that him with the beard? I mean. That's not him. Yeah. Sean King's right there. Right there.

Second, second, again. Second, third to the top. The guy with the beard and the glasses. Somebody give Mike his asthma pump. Yeah, that one. Just click on that one, Mike. Mike. Mike's good at a lot of stuff.

Googling's not one of them. That's his father who was on the birth certificate. And that's his brother on the right. and that's his that's his brother on the white on the right and that's his mom up there everyone is 100 white so why don't peep so what do you when he gets interviewed what does he say about he says his mom what first of all he didn't tell anyone he just said he was black and he only brought it up after it was it was revealed that the that the birth certificate had a white father on it. So because of that, he never

said anything before that he just said. And he won't ever get a paternity test, of course not. I mean, of course he wouldn't. Actually, there was a black conservative who's offered to donate $250,000 I think to Black Lives Matter if he does a DNA test, and he hasn't. That's hilarious.

And it was a black guy who requested it. It's some famous conservative black guy. I can't remember his name. But so what happened was after, I think it was Milo Yapanapapich or whatever that fucking guy's name is. He's not Greek. I thought Milo. Really?

Yeah, he's not Greek. Just got a Greek name? I think he's actually Jewish from England or whatever. He's like a professional troll, that kid, or whatever his name is. Oh, yeah. Yeah, okay. This isn't like an alt-right conspiracy, by the way. If you're listening, you fuck.

This episode is about Eminem. Small-minded, kind of like fucking idiots that roam the earth now. They hear this and they're going like, Yanni sounds very right-wing. No, it's called fucking reality is what it's called. And Yanni's a truth train today. Yeah, reality is a suggestion on this podcast, but not in reality. Not today. Not today. Yep, I'm gay.

So this got released that the birth certificate had a white father on it. And so then Sean King said, this is very painful for me. He's like, I don't want to talk about my personal life, but yo, my peoples, my mom had an affair with a very,

very light-skinned black. It's hilarious. Shawnee. And you know, very light-skinned black guy. That's hilarious. Shawnee. And, you know, that's my family's personal history. It's her business. You know what I mean? Like, I don't want to. So he kind of outed his mom as a hoe, which is fucked up. What is?

Like, his mom was cheating on his dad. Yo, Mrs. King, DM me. Yeah, but he was like. Snapchat, CDTV. Yo, but. And he has a lot to lose because the thing is he he direct like rachel dolesall he directly benefited that's the from from that because if you're doing stuff to help out the black community whatever that is that's great but when he's taking something from an actual

black person that's a big fucking problem and there's also a little bit of a red flag if this is true which i am 100 positive it is just on my hunch. And I'm not the only one, Venetia. Stop looking at me like I'm causing trouble. When Seton comes in, we're going to ask. We're going to ask. That's going to be the first thing. We're just going to fucking ask him. Is Sean King black?

The thing is, like, there is something a little you're going like, if that's true, if that's true, that says something about a person's character a little bit that they would lie to that extent and live that way. You know what I mean? If it's like you want to be a white guy who helps out black people, why not just be honest about who you are? You know, but then when you take a scholarship and, you know, you do a black scholarship given by Oprah, that's taking a scholarship from a black person.

So he's got a lot to lose if that ever comes out that he actually is an Elizabeth Warren fake. Elizabeth Warren just lied about being Native American. I think it's hilarious. It's hilarious. Yeah, this episode's about Eminem. It was a lie?

It was a 100% Stone Cold lie. Yeah, Pocahontas. She admitted it. She admitted it and she apologized for it. Yep. Yeah. No, she's still going to get, Vanity is still getting,

she's still getting Vanity's vote though. I mean, she had not even a drip of it. I have at least 1% Arab blood. So give me a show, Hulu. Give me a show, fucking Hulu. Four more years of Trump. Yay. I got like 37% Turk.

I'm Anatolian. I'm barely white. Give me stuff. Yeah, give it to me. I'm wearing a shirt that says, yep, I'm gay. You know what I'm going to do for my next pitch meeting for entertainment? I'm just going to walk into HBO and just put my 23andMe results on the table. It's what it is.

And say, feed me. Well, that's why I have an audition. I have an audition today for CBS. That's why I'm wearing the Yep, I'm Gay shirt because like, are you going to say no to me? That's hilarious. I'm gay. That's fucking hilarious. So it's what it is. Yeah, that's hilarious. You're wearing that to the audition? Yeah.

Well, no, instead of going to the audition, now Mike's just going to film it for me. I'm just going to Venmo Mike 25 bucks. In honor of Yami month, you know what I love about black people and black culture? Yeah. Is that they love genuineness. They love honesty. Because they have spent a bunch of hundreds of years figuring out how to survive in a country they were trapped in,

where everyone hated them, was trying to kill them and enslave them and all types of horrible stuff. Of course. So they were around white people pretending all the time. So nobody has a better bullshit detector than black people and especially older black women. Yeah, they're the best. They just have a bullshit detector. Yes. So you have to, like, I just always respect that.

Even when you're doing comedy, you feel it. Right. Because, like, in comedy, when you go up there and you're like, you act a certain way, they feel the kind of that you're trying to not be yourself. Black people. Black people. Black people respond to genuineness and truthfulness. The only two things black people don't like are tipping and the gays. That's the only thing they won't. And they don't love that.

They don't love any gay jokes. They don't like gay jokes. They're homophobes and they don't want to give a tip. And that's okay, though, but I don't blame them for it. Well, I blame them for the homophobia, but the i get do your job you fucking waitress yeah they also don't like jokes about jesus at all yeah and they don't want you looking at their feet no and they prefer your jokes to be energetic and perform in an energetic manner they don't like it when you just stand there and deliver from your voice yeah i like yeah they don't and they don't like magicians

they love magicians oh but they don't like that they do the tricks, they can't handle it. Yeah, they just can't handle it. Black people can't handle it. It's like certain people can't handle things like Chinese and Asians can't handle casinos. They can't handle it. They love it. They just go. Like, Venetia just can't handle Puerto Rican guys.

She loves it. Mikey loves anime, and he loves screaming at Venetia for no reason awkwardly two weeks after the incident. It's what it is. I'm just kidding. Sorry, Mike loves it. Yeah, Mike loves it. Mikey loves anime and he loves Screaming at Venetia for no reason awkwardly two weeks after the incident. It's what it is. I'm just kidding. Sorry, Mike loves it. Yeah, Mike loves it. Mike loves it. And I've recently found a new love for sushi.

Yeah, you got a new love for sushi. I don't know why. I just want to eat sushi with the baby. And you can't handle Lebanese chicks because they look like Puerto Ricans? Without the problems, please, baby's mama, let us put that clip back up. It's so funny. Put hummus in my ass. Listen,

do we have to cackle what I said about black people not liking gays and tipping? No, because we're taking truth serum, and these are all stereotypes and a joke, but the truth is, yeah,

black people can be a little homophobic. Yeah, it's just what it is. It's just at comedy shows, we feel it. It's just what it is. When you tell a gay joke, you'll feel it a little bit.

The audience might go, whoa, buddy. You know what I mean? Yeah. We're not here for that. But this episode's about Eminem. But this episode's about celebrating black culture. Celebrating black culture. And we thought Eminem would be nice. Listen, you guys all know his music. I love Eminem's music.

He does have a song out that Vanity brought to our attention. What's it called? Fuck Donald Trump or something like that. So what can you do? Who's your favorite rappers of all time? Because a lot of people put him you do? Who's your favorite rappers of all time? Because a lot of people put him in the top five. My favorite rappers of all time. Eminem.

Yes. Did you grow up in hip hop? I like Kanye West. Yeah. I love Nas. Nas. I love Mobb Deep. Mobb Deep.

Wow. Mobb Deep I really like. Yeah. And then I like. You ain't a crook, son. Just a shook one. Shook one. I like that. And, you know, I know Biggie. I like Biggie, you ain't a crook, son. Just a shook one. Shook one. I like that.

And, uh, you know, I know Biggie. I like Biggie. Biggie. Well, a lot of people consider Biggie the best. I think that's probably the thing. I think Biggie and Eminem, in my opinion, Biggie, Eminem. Here's another one. A lot of people don't know about because I'm an old school head.

I'm a hip hop head. Big L. Yeah. And you got to throw rock him on there and I'm throwing cool G rap on there. What? Come at me, dog. Yeah. I mean, I'm throwing there, and I'm throwing Cool G Rap on there. What? Come at me, dog. Yeah, man. That's mean.

I'm throwing Big L. I'm throwing Cool G Rap on there. I'm throwing. So it's Big L. Why is my nose itching? Big L. Big L. Cool G Rap.

Biggie. I'm throwing M on there. You got to put M on there. Yeah. You got to put M on there. And in fifth, I'm putting, I'm putting uh what's her name uh cardi b no no the one from australia uh iggy azalea i'm putting iggy azalea on this put her up there in honor of shortcake yeah yeah yeah because we're yeah we're no but can you put the eminem notes back on because i want

to read some facts about eminem so i like um i'm putting oz on there probably fifth yeah should we just do should we just do for the last episode of non-mean month just white people that have like like should this episode be sean king eminem andrew schultz well this whole episode is obviously a joke because we're doing eminem so we might as well bring up fucking Sean King, too. Yeah. I mean, the whole thing is a joke. I mean, Eminem is the Elvis of hip hop. But here's the thing. Here's the thing.

Here's the thing. Let's let's be honest. Let's be honest. Black. Everyone steals black culture. And what's happened now is black people are so cool that people have even stole their fucking plight. Everyone's pretending like they're fucking oppressed like black people. That's how cool black people is. Indian people and Asian people. Indian people. Asian people. Indian people. Everyone's pretending like they're fucking oppressed like black people. That's how cool black people is.

Indian people and Asian people. Indian people, Asian people, everyone's acting fucking, that's just stealing black culture. Right. They've gone so far as that's how cool black people are that people are now even fucking stealing their oppression, which is fucking hilarious. Yeah. When you hear Indian people go up there after winning an Oscar and they're going like...

Not that. Is that a way? Sean? She and I got it again. Sorry. It's a way. It was funny. I didn't see it coming.

I don't think that's what they said. That's what you heard. Apparently. Yeah. Yeah. Every time Indian people start talking, I'm just like, where's your carpet? Way. Sean.

She. I'm just kidding. It's just a job. Speaking of carpets, I'll be at the Aladdin theater in October.ober yeah speaking of organ yeah we'll be in del del del high yeah here's the thing here's the thing there you whatever like an indian guy you know you said finally we have representation right it's like finally we have representation it's like it's like guy it's like oh yeah apu was given a bad name to it's like no guy. It's like, oh, yeah, Apu was given a bad name to – it's like, no, guy. Apu was made in like the what?

The early 80s? It's like Indians didn't even emigrate to America until like the fucking 60s and 70s. Right. So everyone who was Indian sounded like that until you were born. You're like first generation. Your parents – all the Indians emigrated to America in like the 60s. And they're crushing it in like 40, 50 years. And they're making on average – South Asian people on average make more money and do better than white people.

So it's like – and then you got these fucking superstar millionaires getting up on stage going like, I don't – I didn't have an opportunity. It's like you're the opportunity guy. You're first generation. You're a multimillionaire. You're you're the opportunity guy. You're first generation. You're a multimillionaire. You're at the fucking Oscars. You're starring in movies. How much quicker did you want this to happen? Yeah.

You know how much of a spit in the face it is to black people? I know. They just be like, we're so oppressed. There was a cartoon that had an accent that was done by a talented guy who could do voices. Oh, my God. It's just like slavery. Yeah. Yeah. Clip it's just like slavery. Yeah. Yeah. Clip it. Clip it. We're never getting a TV show, but I'm

right and everyone listening knows I'm fucking right. Because I actually have a cartoon in development. Clip that and then make my face not there. Just fucking black my face out. Put me in blackface. Wait, no, that's not what we're talking about. It's the wrong episode to make that joke.

Oh, sorry. That was a misunderstanding. You black out his face, but don't actually. Episode's about Eminem. Yeah, just make it black. Make it black it out. I like, yeah, so Eminem actually started rapping at 14 in clubs in Detroit, Detroit, Michigan, and then quit school at 17.

So there you go, kids. Listen, if anyone's younger and is looking to go to college, there's just another example of don't go to school. Don't do it. We're literally just giving your money away to the government, and it's lining politicians' pockets. Don't go to school. Start a podcast.

He began rapping with his high school friend Mike Ruby, not to be convinced with Matt Ruby, who's a comedian. We don't know why. Holy shit. high school friend Mike Ruby not to be convinced with Matt Ruby who's a comedian we don't know why holy shit it's Chrissy Clarice Starling is back just taking shots in the dark he's a good kid where did that one come from I don't know he's a fucking really nice kid it's just Mike Ruby Matt Ruby I'm just kidding around

it's just a character piece fucking Ruby Tuesdays this whole episode is a character piece that I was just kidding around. Yeah, fucking Ruby Tuesdays. This whole episode is a character piece. That's what it is. Yeah. Yeah. So they adopted the names Mannix, M-A-N-I-X, and then Eminem, like the candy Eminem, which of course stood for Marshall Mathers, which everybody knows that. They started doing open mics at the hip hop shop on the West 7 Mile.

That was the ground zero for the Detroit rap scene. So open mics, that's just where everybody starts. Com comedians started open mics and even eminem open mics and i feel like when i walked did you ever see the movie eight mile yeah it's a good movie yeah i like that movie i felt like when i was watching that movie it's like you know the open mic scene like i feel like not that we had to well you didn't do open mics in comedy right you just skipped i did a few but i kind of skipped yeah i started my own rooms yeah yeah yeah i don't want to give anyone any tips out there we need less comedians yeah actually we do need less but i know they're coming in droves now yeah yeah it's just uh do you think what we should do our

rapper but my question is because we know we've talked about that so much here on the comedy scene everyone's a comedian does it happen in music does anyone know it's like everyone just a rapper now or do they still have like not everybody thinks they can rap yeah because everyone thinks they can do comedy but rapping is the rapping is such a difficult skill it's really so hard here's the thing the people who like the snobs who don't know about rapping usually like older white people like this is music it's like yeah it's harder than anything that you've ever listened to that's why everyone's fucking dancing to and that's why it's the most popular music in the world now that's why they're Japanese are doing it. It's because, yeah, it is music, you old fuck. Yeah.

It is music, guy. I did a song with Marisa, Das It, that song, with my friend who is a rapper, Mr. Matter, he grew up as a rapper, Mr. Matter 4, he was in Lyricist Lounge with Eminem. Really? Yeah, he was. It was, their old group was called Word of Mouth and it was Block McCloud,

Rest in Peace, Pumpkinhead. Kids from Park Slope that I grew up with. And you know, they all did Lyricist Lounge. Wait, the guys that was Pumpkinhead who died? Pumpkinhead. How'd he die? I can't remember. It was some health related thing that was like very early. He died. He was great. Great dude too. Oh, that sucks.

It wasn't like even murder. No, but these guys were like underground legends. They like people. Hip hop heads knew about them and Eminem was in that scene, that Lyric lyricist lounge scene, that kind of underground scene. But what was the point? Where would we start? We were saying that the open mic scene in in comedy. Then we're talking about the open mic scene in music. And we're talking about and not everyone thinks they can be.

Everyone thinks they can be a comedian. You know, does everyone think they could be a rapper? I kind of episodes about Eminem. Yeah, I got sidetracked. I forget what my original point was, but he was. Oh, my point was I made the Das It song. My boy, Mark, Mr. Metaphor, helped me write it. So I did kind of the jokes, and he put it in rhymes.

And then we went to his boy's house who had a recording studio, and we tried to lay it down. I had no idea how hard it is to rap with your breath like we the whole thing if you listen to song we faked it so it's like and probably a lot of rappers do it who aren't real rappers but like we just put they just put it together because i couldn't i had to catch my breath right it's like when you're rapping you're like you got to breathe at some point so it's hard to like when you you hear Eminem and these guys and like old school DOS effects. Lamar.

These guys are fantastic. It's insane. The skill to talk that fast and rhyme that fast is like the breath control is nuts. It's hard to do. You got to like practice. Right. Yeah. It's like being an opera singer.

Yes. And, you know, Eminem. And I think, too, like the reverse kind of like, you know, predominantly black audience, like for Eminem to come out the way he did. Like, it's not like Eminem came out I think too, the reverse, kind of like the predominantly black audience, for Eminem to come out the way he did, it's not like Eminem came out as this white rapper and everyone was like, oh, he's this goofy white guy. He came out and was accepted by black audiences

who were mostly, hip hop was for black people or performed by black people for years. Like Eminem was- He got co-signed by Dr. Dre. Dr. Dre put him out. Dr. Dre, I mean, I think hip-hop's first billionaire, right? Is that like he's a billionaire. He should be.

He's a fucking billionaire. Dr. Dre is like a rap, like a musical genius. Sure. One of the greatest producers in any genre of all time. And you know, it's like game knows game. You know what I mean? It's like Dr. Dre heard eminem heard the tape and he just fucking knew because he's he himself is a genius so it's like i bet you a bunch of people

heard eminem and they couldn't see past the color color or whatever all right and dr dre just heard it when just heard straight skills and he was good and he was like wow he said eminem came in second in the 1997 rap olympics in los angeles i wonder who came in first because whoever came in first they thought they they thought they did a good thing. But unfortunately, guy, nobody cares about you. You know what's interesting is like- Second place is the best. So don't strive for first, kids.

Don't go to college. Eminem did it. Eminem came out of a city where there was two white rappers who were blossoming at the same time, which is crazy. Which lets you know there was like a little underground scene, like Chris said, on the 8 Mile or whatever. It was the 7 Mile or whatever. Right.

The 5th Mile. And the other white rapper was who? Someone who ended up becoming a huge Trump supporter and country music singer. Wait. My name is... Larry the Cable Guy? Kid Rock.

Larry the Cable Guy. Who was it? No, it was Kid Rock. Oh, Kid Rock. Because if it's not the 1975 you're not about about about it if it's not the pet shop boys or 1975 i love the 1975's new song too it's fucking cute that's gay music it's gay music that's a gay shirt yep i'm gay yeah um i like the 1975 i told you why and here's what's interesting too i'm a straight man with a gay spirit it's what it is yeah i've i um i i when i was reading

this it was interesting some people say some people are old souls you're a gay soul i'm a gay soul yeah i'm yeah i'm a queen yeah um eminem got in trouble and outraged the gay and lesbian allegiance against defamation society they denounced him they called him a homophobic misogynist um he had a bad relationship with his wife. Um, you know, used to rap about killing her. But my point is, is like, do you think, and this is going to be controversial about to say, but do you think that only happened? Cause he was white. Cause so many rappers talk about, they don't like gays and they talk about objectifying women and people just don't care. But because he was white, these gay and lesbian Alliance against defamation were like, yes,'re canceled. Do you think that?

I think with that specific thing, yes. The homophobia part, yes. If Benatia, who's woke and dope, do you think that? This is not like trying to get one back for the whites. I'm just asking. No, it's an interesting point that you bring up. I think, yeah, maybe it's

because he's white. Yes, because white activists would never attack black, would never say, that's never say that's bad. That rap album was bad. Or maybe they're just not even listening. Maybe they weren't even listening until a white guy did it. And that's equally as racist. Benatia comes out when she's called.

She comes out with a scully hat on her head. And then she comes out with no shoes or socks, but she puts little earmuffs on her ankles. You know what it actually took? You know what it actually took for a black rapper to cause a controversy talk making a song about shooting cops iced tea yeah remember that it was like dan quayle and bush were like all over him you know that it's interesting freedom of speech i mean the the rappers have kind of been under fire like comedians for freedom of speech you know i guess it's like marilyn manson the things that rappers are rappers say i mean they're all rapper rap music videos and this is nothing to do

but they were it's all me too's it's all talking about degrading women but nobody's it's not nobody cares but in the 90s they were the republicans were trying to like create legislation to like fucking really well no you can't do that stifle stifle their uh their music they need to know they were uh it was true they were trying real hard a lot of it was because of the cop killer shit a lot of it was like the violence towards women shit um ice t was very controversial because of that he had a song called cop you know what i say to all that freedom of speech say and do whatever the hell you want to do talk about whatever you want talk you know whatever you want to say if you're like too stupid of a human being

if you're that stupid of a human being we're going to listen to something in a rap song and then do it because then get the you're a weak person you're probably going to do it anyway yeah i don't and i you're not that's not going to help us get towards the master race yeah so you know yeah you need to just i was kidding there's a way i mean where's the button judge it's just the whole thing the whole episode yeah but it is stupid where it's like i've never heard a rapper or a musician or a comedian say something that made me want to go out and be violent towards someone or it's all fear-based shit it's all like weak-minded people it's like majority of people it's like i can hear a song where eminem is talking about whatever he's saying defaming gay people or beating his wife.

And that doesn't make me not like gay people. It doesn't make me want to hit my wife. You know? So it's like, I think we're so scared sometimes as a nation. And he's not homophobic and he was never hitting his wife or he didn't really want to kill his wife. It's called art. It's called lyrics. It's called emotional expression.

It's not reality. I mean, people can't tell the difference between a fucking song or a joke and reality anymore. Grow the fuck up. Yeah. David Cross had a great bit back in the day. Right. David Cross back in the day is one of the best comics. Best, yeah.

And he had a, he was on, I think his like HBO special in 99. He said, he was talking about like the people who were saying the video games were led to to um you know the columbine shooting and he goes like oh i'm sorry he goes the joke was like oh i'm sorry what were the video games that adolf hitler was playing yeah oh what was the rap songs that he was listening to right he was you know so it's like smart yeah it's a good point guy yo can you scroll up a little bit mike you scroll up on the notes real quick? So it was hilarious that you just admitted we're just reading notes off the screen. Down a little bit. Wait.

Can you pull up the cheat sheet a little bit, Mikey? No, up, down. No, because it was something in 2000. Go up. Yeah. Well, Mike, Marshall Mathers, his family emigrated to Detroit. He was born in, where was he born? Oh, wait, maybe down a little bit.

He was born somewhere else. Kentucky or some shit. Oh, yeah. Shithole. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. No, because Missouri. Oh, yeah.

St. Joseph's, Missouri. They call it Missouri. Listen, it's called Missouri, guy. Yeah. He did pistol whip his wife, though, unfortunately. That didn't happen. Oh, he pistol whipped a man he saw kissing his wife. Yeah, that. And he pistol whipped a man because he thought he was gay. A kiss is a squeak and he's happen. Oh, he pistol-whipped a man he saw kissing his wife. Yeah, that... And he pistol-whipped a man because he thought he was gay. A kiss is a squeak, and

he's insecure. Yeah, he's a squeak. Yeah, him and Kim have had a tumultuous relationship. Yeah, it's more... Sounds like you and your baby's mom! I was gonna say, this sounds a little bit like my life. We got that. And then Eminem's mother sued him for defaming her in a song, and I might get sued by my family, too.

So I got a little bit of an Eminem vibe going. Yeah. Well, you guys are both very good at what you do. And you just talk about your personal life a little bit too much. And he's also the history of the Indians because when he released the Marshall Mathers LP in 2000, it set a record for moving the most tickets for a rap album, which is what we just set the record for, for moving the most tickets in New York City. Yeah.

And we just got an article in Los Angeles Times that's about to come out. Thank you to Bob Stevens who wrote the article. It was great to spend the weekend with you. The interview was amazing. Thank you for the meal. Me and Chris really enjoyed it. We can't wait for that article to come out. And the article was great, just about how we balance podcasts and stand-up.

And it was beautiful to have like a nice conversation. How we don't need to manage her anymore. Yeah, and how we support Ocasio-Cortez and how great she is. Yeah, we definitely. How great she is, how great she is. She talks about, you know, the common man and, you know, yay, socialism. And then she wears a $10,000 dress on The View. Yeah. So it's just what it is. You know, in 2020 when everything is tech, why would you, why the hell would you want a huge tech company to come here and create all that job in industry? You wouldn't want that.

We don't need that in New York City. In 2020, I don't know where jobs would come from. They wouldn't definitely come from tech. I think if we just open up a couple more pizza stores and nail salons, we'll be good. It'd be great. Yeah, that'll be great for the economy of the city. Mike, scroll down. Scroll down on the notes.

Here's the thing about Marshall Mathers. I can't on the notes here's the thing about here's the thing about marshall mathers um his i can't see the notes by the way i'm just going blindly itches oh marshall mathers dad marshall mathers dad um was a musician in a local band and the band was called like the daddy hunkers or something it was called like you're never gonna make it your son out did you yeah yeah that's what it was called yeah it was it was caused yeah it was called the give up it was called like you know what maybe the only successful thing you did is have a kid what's called the daddy warbucks the daddy warbucks the daddy warbucks nobody cares it's not gonna make it with that name yeah because listen the guy disappeared to california and he left fucking marshall madden there's a single kid with his mom and kim and kim came up from a fucked up family she started living with them and they were like

it was like at first she was like part of the family but then eminem started banging her out with his mom and Kim. And Kim came from a fucked up family. She started living with them. And they were like, it was like at first she was like part of the family, but then Eminem started banging her out. It's what it is. And then they had a kid who I heard is, I can't say because he got- She's legal.

I know, but he got mad at MGK for saying that she was beautiful. So I don't want him to make a rap song about me. Why? That would be great for our careers. Yeah, but I mean, seriously, why did he get mad about that? She's a good looking woman now, right? How old is she? And I think she's legal. I mean, yeah mean, seriously, why did he get mad about that? She's a good looking woman now, right? How old is she?

And I think she's legal. I mean, yeah, maybe MGK might have said something bad about her. I don't remember. But he destroyed MGK in that fucking battle. Yeah, well, I mean,

I don't know why you would go up. I don't know why you would try to go up again, try to battle rap Eminem. I mean, it's crazy. I mean, the mic name is Machine Gun Kelly. Huh?

She's 25. She's way legal. Yeah, she's like, she's only like, yeah, she's five years younger than my wife. She's legal in every state. She's young though. That's very young. Yeah.

But she's a young girl. Yeah. What can you do? Yeah. She's legal. Then of course, Eminem, when he got real successful in 2001, you know, D12, him and all his Detroit friends, D12, which I think was named after the 12 apostles. That's what my mother said.

That's, I think you're right about that. I think that's actually his HHFOD. That's why my mother listened to Eminem because she said that I like D12, which I think was named after the 12 apostles. That's what my mother said. I think you're right about that. I think that's actually HHFOD. That's why my mother listens to Eminem because she said that I like D12. She's also listening to this for legal reasons. Yeah, and so is – yeah, a lot of my family listens and I didn't know. Do you think your mom just goes to confession and turns on her phone and plays History Hyenas? Yeah, and she's like – And says, help me with this, father.

Yeah, father. That's my good for nothing side. Good for nothing. Yeah, she's like, it says, help me with this. Yeah, father. Yeah, father. It's my good for nothing side. Good for nothing. Yeah, she loves you and she, you know, she, I can't believe she listens to this though. I thought I recommend against it. I thought I'd stop. I thought eight mile Eminem's movie about his life.

I thought he did a phenomenal job and RIP to Brittany Murphy, but she was a piece. She was a piece. Yeah, and that eight mile and I used to move my monkey to the scene when she got banged out. That's how you used to move your monkey to? That's how I used to move my monkey. Because you move your monkey to a lot of just generic scenes. I do, yeah.

You jerk off to weird things. I do jerk off to weird things. You move your monkey to. Don't, don't, don't. Screenshots of women's feet. No, I don't. That's made up. You'll zoom in on a foot.

No. And move your monkey. I move my monkey to the 1975 and yeah i like to move it's not true it's not true so we don't even need a cackle because it's not true i'm not i'm not i'm not that sick i like to move my monkey and shoot it right into my belly button hole because you know 1975 moves your money because when i move my monkey i shoot my glue into my belly button hole. It looks like a problem. You should cackle that. That was weird that I said that. I don't know what I'm talking about.

I tried to make a glue construction joke for pre-K kids. Yeah, because you got to. Sometimes you just shoot. Sometimes I shoot to kill in here, and I kind of kill me and my family. It made sense, but it was just weird. Yeah, so just cackle it out. Yeah, because you got to. Because my baby's mom is listed with her legal team. You got sense, but it was just weird. Yeah, so just cackle it out. Yeah, because you got- Because my baby's mom is listed with her legal team.

You got a war-hardened glue gun. I got a war-hardened glue gun. You do have a war-hardened glue gun, because you move your monkey too much. I move my monkey too much. Now I've been putting condoms on and moving my monkey and splooging into the condom. That's what you got to do.

And I've thrown it at my neighbors. Yeah, you're a sex addict. This has gone off. For the last week of Yami month, did you guys expect anything else? We are the history hyenas. We're going to fucking go wild. We only got Intent to Spare for three weeks. This episode's about Eminem.

Yep, I'm gay. Yeah, so Eminem. Yeah, so Eminem's just. So his dad left him. His uncle, who he loved, died. And let's be honest, Eminem's just insane now. He's got a fucking beard. He's saying he hates Trump.

Now he's just gone insane again, which most geniuses do. But he'd probably be a nice guy if he met him in person. But it's also like, listen, guy, I don't fucking know. You're a great rapper. We all love you. But just shut up with the fucking hat low. I don't know what you're fucking talking about. You came out and you rapped in the Grammys.

I mean, I don't know. That was – people didn't know why that happened just a lunatic like everybody else so are we it doesn't fucking matter yeah we make another song i'm gonna put lakes and maple in my ass yeah we totally can't have a comedian host the oscars that's a bad idea because they could be problematic and unpredictable but what we can't have is eminem do a song who if you go listen to those lyrics yeah wow i mean it's hilarious yeah it's hilarious it's fucking hilarious and it's hilarious when like mcdonald's will look at our content on youtube and go like well we have you know youtube i'm sorry you got to make this a limited ad we would

never advertise on that we would never advertise to kids and families those words but we would because we would love to sell them 100 percent fucking poison. Yeah. So don't say those words because our fucking poison needs to go into those families. How hypocritical are these fucking people? Baby Bubba's. Listen to me. What I want to me, sweetie. When I went on that fucking cruise.

Yeah. When I went on that cruise. OK, my little stinky pinky. When I went on the cruise. Talk to me, baby. Gorgeous. With with with with the with the Impractical Jokers cruise. And we literally takes three hours to get from Miami to the Bahamas. Right.

Takes three hours. But we were two days at sea. All they talked about on the cruise was how all they have is paper straws. And there were all signs. Do your part in the environment. Please wear a green ship. If you don't want to wash your towels please uh leave don't leave them on the floor we're trying to do what i can for the environment and it takes three hours to get from miami to bahamas but because these fat

these fat fucking queso freeloading meat fucking disgusting bottom of the barrel barnacles they fucking barnacles on whales fat disgusting nipple floating you can't from the back you can't tell if it's a man or a woman you just know you don't want to go near it because it smells yeah those kinds of people because of their because they wanted to stuff their fat fucking faces and sitting on the buffet and sit in that casino a trip that should have taken three hours instead takes two days because the boat would just go back and forth past the bahamas past miami past the bahamas past miami and just burn fuel at a rate killing fish probably burning fuel doing way worse for the environment than a fucking plastic straw would yeah did that and and all they and the hypocrisy was all they did was say that they were a green chip

as all they want to do was take these fat fucks and keep them in the middle of the ocean so they could keep the casinos on and keep them feeding their fat fucking faces yeah please use a plastic straw reuse your towel as we embark to sit in the water and use more energy than a small city it uses actually like the amount of fucking energy is like the world world trade center. And then it blew up in their face anyway because twice they had to rush back to Miami even using more fuel because one of these fat fucks had a heart attack or a seizure. Just please end cruises.

That's the type. This is what conserves. I understand. Look, you know I'm a kid that leans left. Black History Month. Yeah, enough with the boats. Enough with the fucking boats. How about that, Hollywood? Enough with the boats. If you're going boats. How about that, Hollywood? Enough with the boats. If you're going to make a fucking speech, and I was about to say, I don't want to hear fucking speeches from actors. If you want to know what their job does, Haley Joyce and Osman did that job when he was 12.

If you're doing a job that a 12-year-old can do and he can do it well, I'm not fucking listening to you about anything. Eminem did a movie and he did a good job learning how to act in 12 minutes. It's what it is. Shut the 12 minutes. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. How about we hear a fucking speech about fucking boats? How come they say, hey, can we end these dumb cruise ships? Because that's really what's taking all the fucking energy. What about that, Joaquin? Oh, do you want a glass

of milk? Yeah. I mean, fucking leave the cows. There wouldn't even be cows if we didn't make them cows. Yeah, exactly. To take their milk. You're trying to save something we created in order to get the milk. There's no such thing as a fucking docile fucking cow that just sits there like an idiot.

Yeah, their farts are blowing holes in the ozone layer. We bred them to be that way. And hairspray. We created chickens and fucking things. Now, do I think it's cruel the way the modern food industry is? Absolutely. I don't.

I don't think it's cruel. I'll fucking electrocute them in my bathtub. Yeah. I'm kidding. Happy Black History Month.cute my bathtub. Yeah, I'm kidding. Happy Black History Month. Happy Black History Month. This episode's about Eminem. I love looking at Venetian because we went... We have to cackle some stuff. We have

major stuff to cackle. Well, not too much. Well, we should. Not too much. A few things. I think we made it. I can't hear the Weishan. Are we hitting the Weishan Sheehan button? It's very low, though. We gotta really raise it up. Yeah, we should. Not too much. A few things. I think we made it. I can't hear the way. Are we hitting the way? It's very low, though. OK, because we got to really raise it up. Yeah, we got to raise it up so everyone knows. Yeah, thank

you. This is 100 percent character please. And I also want to I was listening to the episode, our previous episode about Garrett Morgan who should be more famous, should be more famous. And I just want to give a quick shout out to a Patreon member's name who we glossed over. His name was Will Zhong Jing.

And he didn't get the credit he deserved. Right. For originality. And that one was like, that was like a low hanging fruit that nobody hit. Will Zhong Jing. Shout out to Will Zhong Jing. There's also another Patreon member that we missed their name. But it might be in this one.

But just in case we don't. A plant-based priest pulsed in my cheeks with this piece. That's goodie that's a nice one that's just like that one but not well it's not well shown but i just want to also make sure that we acknowledge uh plant-based priest pulsed in my cheeks that's a goodie also shout out to all the patreon members that came out this past weekend and it was great meeting you guys in person oh yeah please come to the live shows. Yeah. Now the bad news for you Vanity is that I forgot to tell you this. I've gotten maybe 40 messages

now to my account saying that your voice makes our fans horny. Yeah. It's all getting bad. We got to keep you off camera because now they're just saying you're a piece. Yeah. Because Mike faded you in at one point in the last episode and you're on camera and everyone's just saying you're a fucking piece. Yeah. And you were wearing a low cut shirt. You were looking for a piece. Yeah. Because Mike faded you in at one point in the last episode and you're on camera and everyone's just saying you're a fucking piece. Yeah. And you were wearing a low cut shirt.

You were looking for a raise. Yo, Vanity is an animal. Vanity is screwed in. She fucking sold those shirts. Yeah. Like, yeah. She sold those shirts. People kept saying like, she is a fucking she's marketing though. She would grab people and go, Malaka, Malaka, come here. She was calling everyone

Malaka. And they were like, What's a Malaka They loved it It's cute I love speaking Greek Thanks to everyone Who came out to Gotham Comedy Club If you came to the last show A lot of people got upset

Because they saw the pictures And they said What the fuck And I was like Hey babe That's the Russian roulette of life You came to whatever show You came to

Chrissy came to the last one Chrissy Chaos comes When Chrissy Chaos Remembers that it's there Yeah I came in a sweatshirt You just gotta roll the dice I came in a sweatshirt With two women Yeah, I came in a sweatshirt. You just got to roll the dice. I came in a sweatshirt with two women.

Yeah, you showed up in a sweatshirt and some sort of miscellaneous Persian woman. Yeah, it's just what it is. And you were drinking a Vodka Soda. I was fucking hammered. And it's just what it is. You farted in front of Vinny T. 19 times I counted it. I had to get the sperm out. All right, listen, that episode was about Eminem to close out Black History Month.

We got to read the patron names. I got to do a pee-pee. Can I pause and do a pee-pee? It hurts. It hurts. Can I just do a pee-pee? Yeah, just go ahead. Go ahead, go quick.

Let me just do a pee-pee. Yeah, we'll talk. We'll talk. I'll talk to Vanity and Mike. Yeah, I mean, Chris was born. He was just born for the entertainment of humanity. He's just a wild, wild fucking stone cold FF. Thank you to everyone who came out.

Mike, how was your weekend in Jers? It was not as good as your weekend in Gotham. We had a good time. Where were you at? I was with Boss at Bananas and Hasbro Kites. Nice. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't Gotham. Right, right, right.

There were no Hyenas fans there, I'll tell you that. Alright, well, you do a Richie show, but you know, next show at Uncle Vinny's, there'll be some Hyenas fans. Oh, for sure. That place would be awesome. Yeah, and this came out after the weekend, so thank you for coming out, whoever came out. I'm predicting it wasn't going to be as full as Gotham. You think so, V? I think you have a lot of fans

out there. He was looking forward to it. I know Dino was looking forward to you being there. Hopefully. Hopefully. So we'll see. But it was a great time this weekend. It was a great time. Brought out Marisa. It was very, I felt Angelo in the room. My late great friend, Angelo Lizada who used to do those shoes with me. Daniel

Tirado filled in very nicely and Chrissy gave the fans on the last show a very nice surprise by doing a little quick guest set and then he stayed up there and interacted with Marisa while he was hammered. It's what we do. Taking selfies as well. Taking selfies, making boomerang videos with Marisa.

You could go see and you saw in his stories. We had a blast. Most importantly though, guys, these are live podcast tapings. You come there, we say welcome to another episode of History 80. You get to sit in and watch a live podcast live. Back to back. First show is sold out. Second show still has some tickets, not many. Get your fucking tickets in our bios. The link is right there on all

our social media. Historyhyenas.com. New York City. We added another show at Gramercy Theater. Go get them shits. Norwalk, Connecticut. Like I said, I've been watching a lot of Catch a Predator. There's a lot of fucking pedophiles out there. So we're coming there to clean up that city. It's in the Fairfield area.

Norwalk's kind of close to Fairfield. Anyway, wherever you are in Connecticut, put your fucking duck boots away. Put your white Ziffindales down. Tell your mom to take her fucking pills and put them back in the cabinet because the hyenas are coming to Connecticut, babe. And listen, we're doing a live taping there, and we're half sold out. We got an article written about us by the Connecticut paper. Yeah.

And fucking Obama's coming to the show. The show's on Wednesday. The show's on a Wednesday, and we're fucking half sold out already. And the guy who put the whole thing together is Cokehead. So put your fucking monkey away. Come to the show. If you want to take it out and move your monkey, do it during the show where it won't tell the cops. Move your fucking monkey and

it's going to be great. I just peed and I had a nice piss and at the end there was a little burning, but I know it's not an STD because I've been banging guys mostly with condoms. Okay, so that's a good thing. That's definitely a good thing. It's nice to know that you don't have any type of disease because I'm proud of you. I just know I don't have a disease that you don't have any type of disease. Because I'm proud of you. I just know I don't have a disease.

I'm proud of you. It's great. I'm proud of you for taking precautions. Your precaution's Chrissy. Absolutely. I jerk off into condoms. That's what you do. That's what I do.

Yeah. I watch NBA games and I jerk off into, I jerk off to Giannis Akotokoupou in a condom. Okay. Again, I just think like some people are old spirits. You're just a gay spirit. I'm just a queen of a spirit. Yeah.

You're a straight man with a gay spirit. Listen, and it's, I'm just wearing a Yep, I'm gay shirt. of a spirit yeah just you're a straight man with a gay spirit listen and it's i'm just wearing a yep i'm gay shirt and i gotta be honest with you when i'm wearing a yep i'm gay shirt and i'm listening to the 1975 i do feel a little bit gayer which makes me feel a little happier yeah which is nice you're a mixed bag i'm a definition of a mix we've said it before we've said again you're trail mix it's just i'm trail mix let's add maple trail mix you know what you said in the last episode what did i say you said give me my lakeside maple i just got my lakeside maple. I'm ready to scoot.

I'm ready to scoot. Yeah. And it made me laugh hard because what he was referring to is that he puts the lakeside maple on the floor and he scoots around like a puppy with a bum itch. Listen, I want to read out the patron, the newest members of the patron who have went to patron.com slash Bay Ridge boys. Thank you guys so much. You guys have been coming in droves. Your names are so funny that it's getting hard to take. They keep getting better and better and better as always we will we will

pick one ppw pseudo penis of the week um so please uh keep them coming okay first up mandingo enthusiast nice okay nick my last name's a racial slur in africa kefir i don't know what that means but all right um it means exactly what he said. Oh, his last name's Kiefer? Kiefer? What does that mean? It's a Rachel slur. Oh, like a Kaffir, yeah, in South Africa. Then we got Chrissy D,

please put my pee-pee in your BB and cuck this muzzy toot. Okay. Okey-dokey, went for it. Brute, the non-toot, beaut, cute, skin flute, magoot. Another skin flute. I like them. We haven't said skin flute in months. I know.

We got a ton of skin you want to go to skin flints yeah i mean it's funny but i'm going to take away a point just because there's so many skin flutes brock straight back to the porn section here for the content got it yeah andrew frank and frioles fumes lopez it's just funny because he's got a really latin name yeah uh foot foot glue on yanni tastes like fumes and Chobani. Mark it. Mikey, can you mark that, please? Foot glue on Yanni tastes like fumes and Chobani.

Then we got Nady Wadey likes to masturbate. He lied of 14. Those are always funny. Then we got Brooke Woodcock. Good one. Good one. Funny. Then we got Ari Bitch Hips.

Ari Bitch Hips wish my bitch didn't't Have Fumes, or Arison. Okay. Yeah, those are kids who take swings, and it's just Vladimir Guerrero going for the stands, and they just fall down. But it was a good attempt. Then we got Andrew Pupu. Adam, a.k.a. It's Only Gay If The Belly Buttons Touch, a.k.a. Father Bill Gluestew. Like it. It's Only Gay If The Belly Buttons Touch. I like that.

When you go long, it's only getting belly button stuff i like that when you go long it's a it's a gamble brian role plays as a human love sack come inside and crack me wide open good one brought back the lovey uh rio in my cute two to the womb onesie craving that sweet chrissy d then we got swidney omar donnan wow omar not mean yeah skylar franiuti, Kazi Wazi Roman in it for the potty waddy okay Hefe Julian, Maggie, Muris Fitzgerald, Robbie Keenan, Tristan Heimlich, Peyton Frith, Jay Hyena, Jeffrey, Kinda Lonely Could Use a Blowie that's a goodie that's a cricket goodie Caitlin Power, Tim Winder, Andrew Flower, Jesus Hernandez,reg play those 1975 squeaks and crack me open like crete conlan sari howells nice john eat you from behind my junos up your ass

slo ks alvarez it's a goodie jerry r kelly is my sleep paralysis demon gleaming okay goody jordan malton uh chris boganam chrissy the bun cake douglas francisco ryan liebrich nick no muzzies only cuz he's allowed inside my deli lupinacci make a note of him although it was that was a tad edgy. Lupinacci is funny. Funny nonetheless. Next one. My local priest hernia is wild. Don't ask how I know it's what it is. Okay. Yeah, it's an attempt. It's an attempt.

Then we got Dino. How you doing, Dino? From Uncle Vinny's. Yeah. Josh, she wears Jenko jeans while fantasizing about Chrissy's D. Matt Andrews. Jay, I adopted too many hot pockets to retire early Lynch. Okay.

Chrissy. This final solution. Talk got my gosh, blusher fucking pewing, babe. Okay. Let's move past that. We'll move past that one quickly,

quickly. Brian Mori pocket knife, bill TJ tucked back for Chrissy's lap. Just don't want to be a toot. Dylan looks like a Sandra D, but really a white Walker ball. Jesus. Corey Smith. Ruski toot.

The toy poop shoot tooter from Detroit. Then we got flag waving. Putting glue on your skin tag. Oh, move past that one. Yeah. Thank you for the. Thank you. Jack Learoyd.

Bo Butcher. Chrissy, you for the young Jake. Thank you. Jack Learoyd, Bo Butcher, Chrissy, you on the juice protein toots. Tommy going to raise 15 K on Kickstarter to watch the Timmy Dillon episode. Jam. Let's go get that. So page one.com. It's on his vision board.

Slash pay rich boys. Larry Quinn, Jasmine Peterson, Roy Huron, Danielle. Don't become a non toot on the first. My bank account got cleaned out. W Fs.

Okay. People are. I mean, this is kind of the most. This is the most demure list we've had. I mean, this is kind of no disrespect, but this is kind of an ant list. I know this is a straight to the back list. Yeah. Luis, no, no.

I blow in glass. You bought a Ike like Mike emoji. Double chin face. Ashley took a swing at Mikey for no reason. Ashley B. He said he liked me. Did we both? Oh, OK.

Got it. Was it more of a camaraderie amongst fat people? Ashley B. Chrissy D. Can destroy me. OK. Ethan pushing the gay down because Father Bill came on my belly. Semintelly.

Make a note. Yeah. Yeah. Nuria here for the content. I'm a fruit to break out the flute bust me open and fill my glutes another flute another flute austin roan okay thank you all by the way this these lists are getting long the co-body the show body's gonna be hard to beat yeah uh. Chrissy, Chrissy, Fufu, Big Peace and Gray Sweats make the Toots Magoots take a peeky. Jack Payson, Matt, Taylor Williams, Brian Tamarillo, Joey, Chrissy sit on my lap and punch me through to the back. Kitzler, Andrew.

Sounds like an offer. Yeah. Gavin, Fumi Feet, Monaco. Kitzler. Andrew. Sounds like an offer. Yeah. Gavin. Fumi feet. Monaco. Goody. Goody. Ivar collapses her pelvic floor when I punched through her door.

Good day. Went for it. Okay. Freeport. Lou. I don't. Louie. Chrissy.

It doesn't burn when I pee. Holbrook. Okay. Okey dokey. It's more than a fact. Yeah. Tyson. Not like Mike. Cause I'm white, especially below the belt. Overbrook. Okay. Okie dokie. That's more of a fact. Yeah. Tyson, not like Mike Kazumwhite, especially below the belt.

Overcash. Okay. These one-namers are tough, too. A lot of swings today. Kaylee Quick. Josh. Patches O'Houlihan. Banging toots in a cute zoot suit.

Patches O'Houlihan's funny. Yeah. That's a kicker more Irish than that. Yanni, a.k.a. Syphosis. Chrissy with syphilis. And me. Nice. Yanni, a.k.a. Syphosis. Chrissy with syphilis and me. Nice.

A lot of swings. Giannis, Giannis, on can I can tempo poop hole snoop hole. Grab my junk cock. Jamal, S.C., Casey Jones, Chrissy. It's your mother. Shout out Jamal. Yeah, me. Chrissy, it's your mother is funny.

Chrissy, your mother is. That's a goodie. Chrissy, you both make a note. It's originality points. Chrissy, it's your mother. Yeah, it could really be mother is, that's a goodie. Chrissy, do you both make a note? It's originality points. Okay. Chrissy, it's your mother. Yeah. It could really be your mommy.

Evan. I have, okay. Evan, I have awful allergies. Chrissy, it's your move, babe. Laguna.

Okay. That's good. Whitney quant. It's ready with two bees, babe. Ryan Skiba, Peyton, Beloma,

Bill Bradley, Aaron drum bore, Amy, the tranny, muzzy baby who tucks it back for Venetia Rock Hard. Nice. Yeah. Angelica, quiero la carne corea. Logan, give me a blue chew and your speed bag. Joe, make no mistake. I'm an Anglo-Saxon kid. Burroughs, Melissa Mitchell, Sean here for a good time.

Not a long time. McCann. And then last but not least, Sasquatch Cock. Sasquatch Cock. So. Okay. Now, look, thank you all. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. All the people who sign up for all levels that get all the different benefits. Go there.

Check out the one that fits best for you. Wait a minute. I missed a few. Okey dokey. Real quick. This will be quick. Yeah. Connor, Mick with a potato-shaped dick, Carney.

Put them on the list. That's a big one. Finally, we're coming with some heat. Yeah, Mick with a potato-shaped dick, Carney. Put him on the list. That's a big one to miss. Finally, we're coming with some heat. Yeah, it's the bottom row. Veronica from Unconcoma. Put her on the list. Keenan Blanchard. Yeah.

Bobby Nantute. Tuck my flute shoes. String on my boots. Spagnoli. Yeah, give Spagnoli on the list. Now we're getting hot. Yeah, now we're getting hot. Drew Doyla.

Raul. Chrissy cracked me open, but let... Okay. Raul. Chrissy cracked me open, but let Venetia clean me out. A barca. Wow. Did you like put all the good ones later? I don't know what's happening.

Yeah. Patrick, make no mistake. Mistakes were made. Minogue. Another goodie. Yeah. Adrian, don't waste Sean Sheen. A lot of 14.

Cause it's not a character piece. Pena, Nikki, Chrissy can suck my dicky for an anti-histy while I crack open. Okay, tried it. Tried it. Good try, though. I appreciate that one. Steven, who's adopted by a couple of FFs. Sean Terry, be my dad.

McDonald's. It's a goodie. Okay. What about a list? Yarmuless, Ignacio Moreno, Koston, Crankin My Cannoli, Ain't Eatin' Ravioli, Campanella. Put about a list. Wow, we got a lot of lists. Yeah, God, did you put these aside before? Yeah, I don't know

what the hell happened. Then we got the Mexican with the small piece, Munoz. Dylan straight to the back, not here for the content, here to get cracked. Christopher Morris Jr. And then Wade Boggs, 69, a.k.a. Kevin Spacey's Puerto Rican pool boy very funny that's a good originality points

a 10 that guy wins originality and then I and then last but not least I like my coffee like I like my music Leroy I mean saved the day I mean I completely forgot about how did that happen though just because it's front and back but why are all the

why was so many bangers in the back? They were all at the same time. Wow. I mean, okay, so I want to say this. There was a lot of – I give everyone credit for the attempts, okay? And we appreciate your membership, but we're very honest about the funny. I'm saying that we came in strong in the back, but I'm still going with the first one. What was it again?

Chobani? I mean, Veneti is agreeing. The first one still, what we liked so far is Nick No Muzzies Only Cuns. He's allowed inside my deli lupinacci or not that one. He's a goodie. But the Chobani on the feet one. Oh, Chobani on the feet? Yeah, I mean, that's a toughie.

Okay. Oh, yeah. Foot glue on Yanni tastes like fumes and Chobani. Yeah. Is that the PPW? All right, that's the PPW. We should let people vote at some point, too. Somehow, we'll hire someone to go back and get them all. Oh, yeah, now we're going to do these

fucking sponsors. Yeah, yeah. Chrissy's always happy about the people who give us money, goddammit. Well, I'm happy for the fans. Yeah, these are fucking fans. You do feta cheese, guy. Can't do them. I'll do the other ones. Guys, we're proud and happy

about all our sponsors, especially when the check's clear. Give it up everybody for you know who it is. Theo's Feta Cheese. Theo's is an all-natural non-GMO, gluten-free, and R-B-S-T free. No hormones injected into the cow. Fucking type of feta cheese. Theo's is

made the traditional way, not the new way. It's a traditional way by a Greek woman who's squeezing a cow's teat. By a yaya. I'm having a heart attack. You got milk in there, salt, cultures and enzymes, no fillers, no additives, nothing else. This guy Theo, which means uncle in Greece, right? Or Ted. It means God.

God. Theo. Theos. So this is God's feta cheese. This is Zeus' feta cheese. But it can also be your uncle, right? Theo? Theo.

No, no. Toxero, toxero. So my favorite part about this feta cheese is it's not made by a Greek. It's made by an Italian kid. So I'm going to read it like he would read it. All right, listen, guy. Come get your Theo. Theo uses probiot listen, guy. Come get you, Theo. Theo uses probiotics, which are healthy for your stomach.

You didn't know that. Yeah. And yeah. And feta is naturally lower in fat. That is true. It's the most leanest fat. Theo's born and raised in Brooklyn, New York, but he manufactures his cheese in Wisconsin

because he's a screwed kid. Now, Theo's is only available to the public for two years. I don't know why, but that's hilarious. The kid's looking for a score, and he's a screwed kid. Now, Theo's is only available to the public for two years. I don't know why, but that's hilarious. The kid's looking for a score, and he's getting out of the business. It's what it is. He's probably going to jail. Yeah. And he's already – oh, it's only been available to the public for two years.

So he's just starting. No, Theo's Feta Cheese is – I got to be honest with you. He sent a whole care package for us here to the Comedy Cellar, and the Theo's Feta Cheese, not only did we love it, but they started selling some of it in Comedy Cellar. And people are asking for more Feta Cheese. Yeah, it's delicious. It's that good. So really, go get it. Theo's Feta Cheese is the Chrissy D of Feta Cheeses because two years in, Chrissy was crushing it too.

Yeah, I'm just coming in. Yeah. Yeah, you came in hot in comedy. I came in hot. Yeah. Also, the Feta Cheese is gay. And it's also, it's got a gay spirit. So Theo's is crushing. I want to do Lakeside Maple. Yeah. Also, the feta cheese is gay. And it's also, it's got a gay spirit. So Theo's is crushing.

I want to do Lakeside Maple. Yeah. So Theo's is being sold. The reads are too long. In over 2,000 plus supermarkets in New York City and throughout the Northeast. My favorite is D'Agostino's. Yeah. Try to say it again.

D'Agostino's. Yeah. That's a kid who's never been in a fancy supermarket. Yeah. No. Say Seatown. You can say that. No problem.

Yeah. Seatown. No problem. So that means that the feta cheese can be bought with food stamps. You can purchase deals at your local Key Food, Gristini's, which is owned by a Greek, Big Y,

King Cullen, where Chrissy's mom wishes he was shopping with his wife, who she still messages. Still messages. Food Town, Med Foods, Agostino's. She also listens to the pod. Associated, C-Town, Superresh, Food Emporium, Food Universe, Guianta Meats Farm, Food Dynasty, Compare Foods, Pioneer, Crasdale, Buzutos, CNS, and Porky's.

And for anyone else who's not in the Northeast or New York area, you can go to Amazon, Amazon.com, and get Theo's Feta Cheese. It's TheosFeta.com. Go to Amazon. Go to their website. Get yourself some fucking feta get Theo's Feta cheese. It's Theo's Feta.com. Go to Amazon. Go to their website. Get yourself some fucking feta for yourself. Feta. Okay.

Now, of course, Lakeside Maple. Use their promo code WILD for 15% off. Everybody knows LakesideMaple.com. Some of the best trail mix, whatever type of mix it is. I'm a mixed bag and I like to put mix in my body. Yeah. So I like, I mean, I can't say the nice things about Lakeside Maple. The guy who owns it sent me a message, said that he did send

me a t-shirt with my name on the back. So I appreciate that. But your baby's mom is using it as a night shirt. It's what it is. Yeah, she's probably used it as a night shirt. So Lakeside Maple, stick it up your ass. That's where it goes best for me. I can't wait for the elections in November because I'm going to waddle into that voting booth with some

Lakeside Maple falling out of my ass, voting to the elections in november because i'm gonna waddle into that voting booth with some uh lakeside maple falling out my ass voting to the right um 15 off 15 off use the code wild w-i-l-d tell them the bayridge boys sent you in the history i ain't sent you lakeside maple thank you for uh continuing to support us truly that that uh trail mix is unbelievable fans if you support us support our sponsors go to lakesidemaple.com use promo code wild get the fucking lakeside maple take a picture of it. We'll repost it. We're also brought to you by nobody else. James Altucher. James Altucher. His episode was great.

Yes, and it's coming out soon, right? Oh, it's on the Patreon already, though, no? It's already on Patreon. It's on Patreon, so you can go here. We're going to release it soon, though. We're going to release it soon. The great James Altucher. He's a jack of all trades, and he's good at it, man. He's a genius. He's also funny. He's a comedian. He owns And he's good at it He's a genius He's also funny He's a comedian

He owns a comedy club He does everything He fucking makes Bitcoin His wife's a piece His wife's a piece Yeah And she likes him for his personality Not his money

Did you notice he was just itching The whole show too He was just itching Jewish guys just get rash They get a little rashy So follow him on James L. Tucci Can you hit the Weijongjin button Don't say no

Don't say no Just hit the button When Chris is in the room. He can't go and rot, daddy. Put a condom on the kid. Put a condom on the kid. I'm warrantless. Yeah. So James Al Tucher, go to

at James Al Tucher, all one word to follow him. Check out his podcast. We were on it. Go check out our episode. Check out the rest of his episode. He's always talking about interesting stuff. And go check out his comedy club, Stand Up New York on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. James Altucher. Also,

one of my favies, 9th Street Auto Collision, not on 9th Street. It's on 133 West Hills Road. That's like calling us the History of Hades, but saying we're located in History of Hades, but our name is Girls Gotta Eat. Yeah. Yeah, I wish we had their success.

Yeah. So, listen, if you have any problem with your fucking car out on the island and you listen to our podcast and you're a hyena or you're part of the matriarchy, go over, see Frankie at 9th Street Auto Collision, and he will give you a lifetime warranty on all your repairs. He gives people good – I love his copy because he sent it in. His copy just says we give good people good deals on parts and labor. Yeah, so that means good people, good deals. And when he means by good people it's white Republicans. 133 West Hills Road. 631-351-5300.

Anyone out on the island, any problem with your car, go to that fucking auto repair station. It's called 9th Street Auto Collision, but it's not on 9th Street. It's not on 9th Street. And of course, go to historyahinas.com, christycomedy.com, yannispapascomedy.com for all our live shows, March 19th in New York City, April 29th, Connecticut.

We're going to have a good time, and it's just been great. This episode was your final episode for NAMIN month, Black History Month. We ended it off with Eminem. Yannis is walking away because he's got full-blown Alzheimer's, and he's yawning, yawning here from. Yeah. Hair from now. From now on, go get yourself some mug.

I got myself a mug on history. And his.com. And yeah, it doesn't matter anymore. I got to go kiss a guy in the lips. Follow us at history. It is.com. Leave a review. Leave.

Tell your friends. Like, subscribe. Follow me. And I might be sores. leave tell your friends like subscribe follow me at mike b sorensen Thank you. Bye.