History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 136 - Tiger King is WILD!

Episode Date: April 8, 2020

The Cuzzies catch up and give their takes on the Netflix sensation Tiger King! Make no mistake, there's no holding back from these two stir crazy kids!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

ស្លាប់បានប់បានប់បានប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់� Yeah. What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode, a special episode, a quarantine episode from Zoom with Chrissy Corona and Yanni Punani. Hi, how you doing? I'm sorry. We're just starting the podcast here. Just got a message from, um, she wanted me to join the honest is live video chat, um, before. And I said, I couldn't. And she said, this is why I stopped listening to the potty. Uh, and I said, why? And she said, cause you're just not invested as much as you used to be. And here's the thing, bitch. Okay. It's's i was i had my daughter in school at the time as you can see the little schoolwork behind me because i'm running a fucking family here while you because i could see your pictures while you and your fat fucking bloated ass sit around and

drink quarantinis and act like you actually are doing something or saying something i'm running a fucking family here and i would have 100 jumped on on Giannis' Instagram live and came and said and did something wild if I was not trying to raise a four-year-old daughter and be her preschool teacher while simultaneously trying to get through a pandemic. Okay, so why don't you go sit down and watch whatever bullshit thing or tweet whatever bullshit thing that makes you feel important when you're not and start listening to the podcast again podcast again before i come over there and sit in your boyfriend's lap and put my fucking pandemic coronavirus ridden tongue right down his throat i think we just we just got another guest that came to the podcast and hello and welcome back steel pipe chrissy wow i. I didn't know you were going to go up.

The $20 chef is FaceTiming me, but here's the thing. During a pandemic, I'm only picking up the phone for people that got two eyes. We love you, Sean Latham. Love you, Sean Latham, but guy, I'm in no fucking mood right now, okay? I'm tucked back. I'm ready to go.

I'm on the verge of getting kicked out again. I've had three cups of coffee and a cough that just won't quit. So I'm fully slipping into COVID. I'm ready to fucking go. Thomas Dale read my soul yesterday, and I'm fully gay, ready to flip out. Let's get this piece of shit Jeff Lowe from Netflix, from Tiger King, that scamming con artist. Let's get him on the podcast so I can live chat in my father and they can talk about schemes and other ways to steal my money.

I think I just came up with a new modern nickname for you. It is Cooped Up Chrissy. Yeah, Cooped Up. Chrissy's going cuckoo right now. You're cooped up. You're teaching a four-year-old daughter. You're in the situation. I mean, cuz, you got corona. Cuz're cooped up. You're teaching a four-year-old daughter. You're in the situation. I mean, cuz, you got

Corona. Now, Mikey, do we legally or Venetia, did I, because I said her actual name, could we get in trouble? Or it's like you're DMing me. It doesn't matter. I mean, I can beep it if we need to. We're definitely going to beep it just so we don't

want the hyenas attacking because right now we got a rabid, loyal fan base. And Nate Bargatze can tell you what happens when they hit the DMs. Yeah, that's the thing. Lay off the gas with Nate Bargatze, okay? Because make no mistake, that kid's only good at one thing, live performing, and that's not going to be available again until 2022. So, guys, you've got to make no let's let's lay off the gas with uh

with nate okay yeah everybody just you know and also to whoever the uh woman is that i i guess i was direct messaging um a couple of months ago that i didn't realize his friends would stop sending her clips to the podcast why say things about her because i'm gonna get sued so whoever that bitch is she needs to sit the fuck down too it's a pandemic let me be you just said her name do we have to cackle that say I didn't say your name because I don't know who it is you said the situation's name oh yeah cackle that yeah no that's an automatic cackle I know okay know okay here's what we know for sure and there's we don't know there's a lot we don't know for sure right now we don't know when we're coming back

uh to a studio we don't know when this pandemic's gonna end but we do know two things one thing is that we're no longer at riot cast yeah we're out of here and the second thing is the second thing is just because you stick chopsticks up your ass doesn't mean you get the coronavirus yeah it doesn't mean that and we and chrissy is fucking a present i'm here i was absent-minded yesterday um with thomas dale because i was going through something but now cuz make no mistake i'm fucking free that girl fired me up i'm free and i'm sick and tired of getting pictures of Heybert's gout. Yeah, I mean, it's what it is.

Does Heybert really got the gout? I mean, how did that happen? I'm like, I don't know, guy. You know what? Why don't you just cut your fucking foot off, okay? I mean, at this point, it's like, just cut it off. Get in a wheelchair. This way, you'll have more access in the emergency room when you think you're coming down with

Corona-19, but it's just because you banged some toot from seattle and you're fucking not you know you're not a rock star comedian like you want it to be and that's giving you a low-grade fever and chills i mean what do you want me to tell you i mean yeah i mean you're you're going fucking wild and i love it right now this is i don't know who this is it's steel pipe chrissy morphing into to chrissy clarice i mean you were fired in the dark you got your night goggles on and you're just shooting babe just shooting and make no mistake this thing got fucked last night yeah because i can't get any lapus i've been cutting holes in my daughter's stuffed animals and they've been getting glued down what do you mean you can't get any lapus i can't get any i mean because you know you i can't well number one i've been i'm i'm back and forth you know with the situation I keep coming back and forth and two it's like you can't I can't

risk you can't risk toots right now I mean I can't you know yeah it gets sick so I just been banging out my daughter's stuffed animals yeah I mean you're I mean you're cooped up Chrissy right now cooped up Chrissy when this thing's over you're gonna go like it's gonna be cartoonish how you fly out that door you're gonna fly out that door like the roadrunner there's gonna go like it's gonna be cartoonish how you fly out that door you're gonna fly out that door like the roadrunner there's gonna be like a dust ball behind you and you're fucking running out there and you're jumping on the first two you see we need we need dr andrew agos to step away from covid19 patients make some cooped up christy memes right now yeah i mean you know he's gonna be on it and also you know we going to get 15 of Hey Bert without a foot in a wheelchair.

It's going to happen. And somehow he's going to work in Jan the Squeak. Make no mistake, Andrew Agos is obsessed with Jan the Squeak. And make no mistake, somehow Hey Bert's going to get mad at you for it, even though I'm the one that caused it. Hey Bert. All I wanted to do was help Hey Bert, but he doesn't want it. Yeah, it's what it is. Here's the thing. So, yeah, there we go. All I wanted to do was help paper, but he doesn't want it. Yeah. It's what it is, cuz.

Here's the thing. So, yeah, there we go. Fucking, there's Chrissy from the 50s. Wow. There's civil rights Chrissy. Yeah. Cuz, make no mistake. Oh, the situation's banging something.

Make no mistake. These glasses have no frames, but they're just fun to put on. And it's a different wild look when you have glasses on. Yeah. I feel like an FF right now. Yeah. No. Yeah.

You look like a civil rights, like a Jewish civil rights marcher that like disappeared in 1959 or 60 in Mississippi with those glasses. Those glasses just, those glasses say that you're holding up a sign for civil rights. That's what those glasses say. Yeah, no, 100%. Whose glasses are those? I don't know, but they have no,

yeah, these glasses, these glasses call it COVID-19 and then this look says it's the fucking China virus. Because that was funny for a second. You had glasses on and I didn't. You know, we switched roles right now. Yeah. We are officially right now. Yeah.

We are officially at All Things Comedy. That's the first big announcement we want to tell you. We're bringing all the crew. Big announcement. Yeah, All Things Comedy is Bill Burr and Al Magical's company. We want to thank Riotcast for all that they did. We had a great time over there. We really appreciated how you helped us really form.

And I'm just going to say something. I'm just going to say we're excited to be over at All Things Comedy, Bill Burr, Al Magical. We're happy to be there. I just want to say thank you so much to on a serious note, thank you so much to Riot Cast and the Laugh Button for being a stepstool for me and Giannis to fucking

slam dunk our careers right now. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. Yeah. It's Chrissy Truth Serums. It's Chrissy fucking COVID-19. It's Chrissy cooped up. Chrissy chaos.

Chrissy. You're getting hit with a fucking rebound phone of Chrissy right now. It's just what it is. Here's another big announcement. I just want to give a shout out. I just want to say thank you so much to Riot Cast and the Laugh Button for all your efforts in helping us

do this podcast. We really, really, really appreciate it. Thank you guys so much for all the hard work and dedication that you put in. But at this moment, we're going to go to All Things Comedy because we just feel it's a better fit. But I just want to say thank you so much. We couldn't have done it without you. And then I take the glasses off and it's like listen right past laugh but you got about three

good months out of us because we should have left you guys over the fucking summer because now billy burnell magical gonna start making movies with us and we're gonna forget we even fucking existed way song she ain't yeah there you go oh yeah yeah yeah said Chip Chipperson. See you later, Laugh Button. Yeah, but don't worry. We're bringing Mikey. We're bringing Venetia with us. Yeah, don't worry. Don't worry.

We're also taking your staff. Yeah, we're taking your staff, too. So that's happening. We're over there. We're excited about that. We're going to be doing L.A. a lot more once this COVID-19 calms down. And here's another big announcement. We are going daily be doing L.A. a lot more once this COVID-19 calms down. And here's another big announcement. We are going daily during the quarantine.

Me and Chrissy will be coming at you every single day with a new podcast. There will be a bonus episode every week on Patreon, plus tons and tons and tons of miscellaneous content on Patreon. Guys, we need you more now than we ever did. Ever did. So thank you guys so much. Go to historyofhyenas.com. Get our merch while you're sitting around doing nothing. Put a t-shirt on. Also go to

patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We have any tier that would work for you. If you're in a financial crisis, don't even worry about it or just give what you can give if you want. We put a lot of extra content in there. We put a lot of extra stuff in there so go ahead patreon.com slash bay ridge boys um but thank you so much for tuning into this podcast uh for the free whatever toots

now kind of everybody it doesn't matter right now during a pandemic everybody's kind of just a non toot because we don't know who's got money. I mean, how many people? 50 million people or something today fucking applied for unemployment. So I don't know. I mean, I applied. 60 million. Oh, sorry. 6.6. Shit, yeah.

We're stupid. If it was 60 million, then yeah. I mean. Let me ask you this, though. Let me ask you this. Because there's a lot of like these numbers that are going around, like 6 million or even like six feet social distancing. Like it's just so close to six feet

under like couldn't they have just said seven feet social distancing lucky number seven like there's something in the thing with six and six i feel like government's doing it on purpose you think that's crazy that's just cooped up chrissy being nuts yeah i think you're definitely cooped up chrissy you're making connections that aren't there that's exactly what happens when people start losing their mind it's what it is i completely losing. Is it okay to put these glasses on with no frames? Okay. We know lenses. Yeah.

Well, you know what we could really use as a part two to ask him about the Iranian clip. Cause that was a real classic moment on the history hyenas. Maybe if you put the glasses on and ask her, it could go better. Yeah. Well,

it's definitely not going to happen now. Here's the thing. What I was also thinking is this if every single listener of the history hyenas every single listener told one person look this is how magical this is and how easy it is if every single listener told one person we would double our fan base just like that right how wild is that's how easy it is because we're completely make no mistake we are we're the whole foods of podcasts we are fucking organic we are fucking word of mouth hyenas are spreading the cackles getting bigger it's all people telling people

so if every single person who's watching this right now right we're talking about thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of people. If each one of you picked one friend or person who you haven't recommended the podcast to right now, gave them your favorite episode to start, because everyone's looking for a new podcast to start right now, we would double our numbers. Can you do that for us? Go do

it. Fucking Panthers, activate. Yeah, activate. Now, listen, we're going to talk about Tiger King today. This episode's about Tiger King. I know everyone's been watching it. It's like life's about timing. Like they said with Rodney Dangerfield, he was doing No Disrespect. And then a movie, The Godfather, which came out, which is all about respect. He became who became. I feel like Tiger King, it came out, it was just perfect timing. I mean, that thing came out when, I mean, billions, billions of people are just stuck in front of their TV and they, you know, we got Tiger King and we're going to talk about it today. But before we talk about that, I want to talk to you, Yanni. I mean, how have you been doing, you know, walking? How have you been doing with just being cooped up with your wife? I mean, how have you been doing with the dog? How have you been doing seeing Verzi with the crown?

I mean, I want to know how things are in New Hampshire. Things are really calm and cool. And I tell you what, as soon as I got my three months off from the mortgages, that felt now I'm chill. Now I'm like, you know what? Now it's just like everything's frozen. You know, I got enough to survive for a little while so everything's pushed if everyone by the way if you don't know call your bank immediately if you have a mortgage or or or if you have a landlord i don't know what the landlord rule is

but tell your landlords but if you have a mortgage definitely call your bank and they will give you a no penalty moratorium for three months where you don't have to pay. So once that happened yesterday, it really felt like there was a load off my back. And it's like right now, you know what, this is a horrible situation, but I'm making the best out of it. You know,

like I'm going outside late at night after everyone's asleep, you know? And one of the things I'm enjoying doing besides taking baths, like a girl who's trying to get her groove back. I've really been enjoying bath time. And I've also really been enjoying peeing outside at late at night. There's something very freeing about taking your dick out late at night and just peeing in the woods, you know, with nature. Taking a nice little piss in the woods.

No, I agree. I agree. I've really enjoyed coming outside my apartment in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, and peeing on Chinese people, so I know what it is. Yeah, that's what you're doing. I mean, tomato, tomato, if you want to. Yeah. It's tomato, tomato. Now, a lot of people are saying it's not even a virus and it's from 5G cell phone towers.

What do you say about that? And by a lot of those people, I mean Republicans from my neighborhood. Yeah. No. I think the verdict is out that it's from the wet markets in Wuhan. That's where this started. The funny thing is we did an episode on Wuhan, but we had to cut the first half of it out because we were, you know, we've just been cooped up a little bit. We're all a little ornery. We're all a little

ornery and surly because we're just fucking, you know, our business is on hold right now and everyone's worried about money and the whole globe's been brought to its knees by this fucking Chinese squeak virus. So we came in a little too hot. We had to actually cut the episode. Yeah. I'm cooped up, Chrissy. It's just kind of fun and light hearted. And then you're just Yanni the Nazi when you get you just got to a point where I was like, even I was like, I don't think we can release this.

Yeah, you know what happens is like we're just all a little frustrated and we're trying to figure out like what's the cause of this? What's the cause of this? And I'll be honest like yeah, enough's enough with the fucking wet markets. Okay, we'll do a do over of what we did last episode that got cut. What we were basically saying is enough with the wet markets. You can't eat dogs.

You can't eat cats. You can't eat fucking foxes and exotic animals. Enough with the monkey brains. Just fucking eat chicken like regular people. Just do it. Yeah. And I think, you know, I think as this thing goes on, you know, obviously more and more stuff will come out.

I mean, I think at the end of this all, somebody's got to just give Dr. Fauci a fucking sippy cup and just let him hang out. Right. I mean, why is nobody why is nobody making memes of Dr. Fauci with lollipops in his mouth or sippy cups? I mean, that guy's a little tiny fucking guy, but he's a smart kid. Yeah, well, Andrew Agos is on it right now. But absolutely, when this thing gets solved and somebody comes up with a

vaccine, which will happen, geniuses will do what they do and they'll propel us forward. And when that happens, somebody's definitely got to pick up Dr. Fauci and put him on their shoulders and march around. Make no mistake, Dr. Fauci is just a Brooklyn Guido guy. He's a New York City guy. He takes off that suit and he's

got a wife beater with a sauce stain on it and he backslaps his wife if she gives him any lip. It's just what it is he will fix the pandemic but if that garlic is not sliced thin enough cuz make no mistake you're it's not gonna be a good day yeah well what's gonna happen is you're gonna put them on your shoulders i'm gonna put jan this week on mine and we're gonna play water polo together it's just what it is cuz jan this week versus dr fauci might be might be the game of the century when sports comes back that's the first match i want to see jan the squeak versus dr fauci yeah and let me tell you something right now i'll tell you something right now fucking there's a lot of

republican kids out there there's a lot of fucking republican kids in the midwest and in long island staten island who are fucking tuning in every day at 11 to see fucking andrew cuomo fucking talk and you know what? It's almost like, you know, for those kids, it's like having a gay thought. Having a Democratic thought is like having a gay thought. And right now they can't help but find themselves liking Andrew Cuomo. And their fucking wives are also digging Andrew Cuomo because they secretly jerk off to Chris Cuomo. Because the kid's a piece.

Chris Cuomo is a sick kid right now. We hope we wish Chris Cuomo a speedy recovery Hold on, Mikey, in one minute At five o'clock, I gotta do My live stream They're playing my Comedy Central half hour It's going live right now And I gotta fucking chat it up

With them But Mike, are we good On doing that? Yeah, yeah You can just pause it right on your phone i'll just do it from my phone right i mean yeah and it's like what connie said just let me download the special so i could put clips out on instagram but they keep telling me they contractually can't do it i'm like the world's on fire there's no contracts where are they putting it up on they're live streaming it from their channel. And then they're leaving it up after that on YouTube?

Probably not. Well, I mean, hopefully they leave it up. I mean, that's great, though, if they're putting it up on YouTube. That's great. They're finally getting with it. That would be great because, you know, that's where it gets seen the most. Yeah, so hold on. Just keep talking for one second.

Once I get this loaded up, then we'll be all right. All right. Well, listen, if it's up, go look for Chrissy's half-hour special. It was a half-hour. We both did half-hours the same year. We hung out that year in Boston. He wanted to wear a shirt that had Marilyn Monroe with two revolvers, and they told him no.

I mean, the kid's wild. It was really funny. I was a chunky kid then, too, no? You were a chunky kid. Yeah, I was a skinny mini, and you were a chunky kid then too no you were chunky kid we were yeah i was a skinny mini and you were a chunky kid here's the thing comedy central like if you know nate blew off of office half hour if you just fucking put those half hours on youtube back then like so many people probably could have had bigger careers you know but nobody saw those things and now they're finally putting them up on youtube that's great i hope they're doing that i hope sam morell's

uh special made them change their policy now they're thinking you them up on YouTube. That's great. I hope they're doing that. I hope Sam Morrell's special made them change their policy. Now they're thinking, you know what? Let's put it up on YouTube. Maybe we'll get some ads through YouTube. Let's just take it in the ass from YouTube on the ad side. Because that's probably why they didn't do this sooner. Because YouTube probably wants a bigger cut of their fucking thing. Hopefully they do that.

That's great. But Chris's half hour, you had a great fucking half hour where you talked about your ex-girlfriend at the time getting banged up by a nick getting banged up by nick and then yeah and then i texted one of the staff members that night she had a full period on my stomach so it's just what it is hopefully she's not a fan because i could get sued yeah and they're never gonna put my half hour up because make no mistake i put it up illegally and they they put a bullet to take it down so it's just what it is because now let me ask you this. We both watched The Tiger King. We both loved it. But because you're, you know, our left

Democratic hotshot candidate, animal loving F-A-double-G-O-T, what was your thoughts on it? Yeah, I mean, I love Coop Duff Chrissy. I mean, you're just, yeah, you're coming, you're coming. You've just, right now, I know what happened. At the beginning of this, you said, you know what? All I see in the foreseeable future is hyenas. I'm going full

in. If I'm gonna do it, you're going going full in and you're also a little excited that we're at a riot cast it's just what it is i've been cooped up christy for a long time for other reasons yeah i am i'm right now everyone's talking about the cuomo boys and fucking tiger king tiger king is one of the most it's one of those things like you said timing's everything what you were saying before just to explain to people is rodney Dangerfield's career didn't take off until he was in his fifties. He was always a good comedian, but it just, there was no public appetite for him in his opinion until The Godfather became a massive hit. Everyone was talking about like respect and the family. And then he was the opposite. He was the comedic, like, I don't get

no respect. And that kind of shtick kind of worked for him he felt because the zeitgeist had come around to his what he was doing and who he was the character he created now fucking tiger king the timing of this yeah if there wasn't a pandemic do you think chris that yes tiger king would be as big do you think it's because there's a pandemic that it's the biggest show in the country? I think for sure Tiger King would have been huge because it's just so amazing. And the guy, the lead of it is just such a fucking maniac that I think it would have been big. But I also believe that, yeah, a lot of it is just, I mean, there's so many eyeballs on this thing. I personally think so far we're going to talk about Tiger King, but next week, hopefully, on this thing.

I personally think so far, we're going to talk about Tiger King, but next week, hopefully the unorthodox thing about the Hasidic Jews, that is even crazier to me. And I can't believe that isn't bigger than it actually is. And then I also watch another Netflix thing called The Platform. Have you seen this?

No. Dude, it's a story about this prison that's like 300 stories tall. It's like a, it's a movie. And the platform comes down and at each floor the inmates get food and it only comes down for like a minute a day but as the floors go lower they get less and less food and it's like a fucking wild story i would suggest watching that tonight after you uh bang out your wife to procreate i mean all i've been doing is

watching mad men uh eating Klondike bars. And I just, for today, I had two pieces of baklava for breakfast and two pieces of baklava for dessert at lunch. It's getting bad and getting ugly. So, yo, we're Quarantine Cuties. And, of course, we want to give all our love to our two main guys, Lakeside Maple, lakesidemaple.com. Go get your trail mix. It's so delicious. Three flavors.

Ginger chai is my favorite. I put it in my yogurt. Chris puts it in his ass. Lakesidemaple.com. Go to lakesidemaple.com and enter the promo code WILD for 15% off your offer. Cuz, I'm going to DM you

and let you know you should go a little bit more for the quarantine time. Should be maybe 20% off. And also, James L. Tucher, thank you for giving us money. Thank you for giving us money and we read your blogs. That's what it is. And we are also brought to you and we are honored to be brought to you by Tushy, cuzzy. Yeah. Tushy wooshy. Yeah, there is an absolute toilet paper shortage right now. Yep. My ass has been 25% clean since it started.

Yeah. But you know who doesn't need toilet paper? Who? People who aren't wiping their ass like me. Yeah. Yeah. Treat your butt right with Tushy. Because Tushy sprays directly to your ass and removes the poop completely.

So you aren't sitting on bacteria that leads to nasty things like hemorrhoids, yeast infections, UTIs, itchy assholes, and skid marks. Well, I got news for you, Tushy. Ever since I found you and you've been spraying my ass, I've had none of these things, but I still do have chlamydia. Here's the thing. Tushy is kind of like your dirty ass is kind of of like the coronavirus and tushy is the vaccine wet wipes are actually worse than toilet paper and they're terrible for the environment and they cause they cause anal fissure so that's why my ass has been bleeding i've been using my daughter's wet wipes but now tushy sprays your ass with fresh water it's not toilet paper it

connects to the water supply behind your toilet to spray your dirty parts your dirty ass with clean fresh water it's the same water you brush your teeth to spray your dirty parts, your dirty ass with clean, fresh water. It's the same water you brush your teeth with. Now you're just brushing your ass with it. That's what you're doing. I mean, come on, guy. You don't want to be wiping around and moving bacteria around. Now we're all very germ conscious.

And look, when you're using toilet paper, you're moving bacteria around. It leads to fucking yeast infections, UTIs, all types of skin. I said that already. You're Yanni Sundowns. Oh, you already did that part. Here. Here's what you got to do. If youanni Sundowns. Oh, you already did that part. Here. Here's what you got to do. If you're going to listen to anything, listen to this right now.

Go to hellotushy.com slash views to get 10% off your order. That's hellotushy, H-E-L-L-O-T-U-S-H-Y dot com slash views to get 10% off your order. Hyenas, hellotushy.comenas hello tushy.com hello tushy.com slash fumes because it's only 79 bucks i'm fucking getting it i was gonna buy a tiger cup from joe exotic but now i'm just gonna clean my ass instead for 75 bucks hello tushy.com yeah the tiger king i mean i think it would have been just as big because I think the word of mouth would have spread because there's so many like American facets in that thing. American is this story to exploit these exotic animals for, for money and to make it big business and to sort of fight any legislation to keep America free. But really what that means is keep America fucking free for me to fucking be a

dirt bag because what they were doing, what they do is the cub petting is they rate, they basically use these tigers to create these cubs. And then once the cubs get too big, it's not economically advantageous for them to keep them around anymore because it costs too much to feed them. So they keep like one or two for their fucking zoo. And then they murder like 10 cubs. Like that guy that Schultz had on his podcast has a fucking gas chamber at his private zoo where he just after the cubs get too old they just give fucking gas how about this i got an idea how about instead of gassing and

killing the cubs when they are too old or gassing and killing any tiger when uh you can't use them anymore why don't we just keep them alive and then why don't we just release them on the democratic national convention what if we just do that would that be good just release him right on the dnc one day that's better i thought you were going to say release him into chinatown so i'm glad you said the dnc because you think they're both martians because let me ask you a question a starving tiger do you think if i threw ruth bader ginsburg into the cage it would spit it out or would it eat it or not want it i don't know if it would eat it because I think tigers are fucking racist against Jews. Because the thing, the truth of the situation is this, is this tiger,

if I got into, if I got into a cage with a tiger, it might as well eat me, but make no mistake, it's getting its dick sucked first. So it's, that's just what's going to happen. That thing's going to get milked one way or another. You know, that's a good strategy move because if you start sucking its dick,

your only hope against the Tigers is to confuse it. That's what it is. Go straight for the dick and just confuse it. You gotta go confident. You can't be scared. You gotta go confident. Make no mistake, I said that I would suck a tiger's dick and Mrs. Pompous sat down and then she left.

Now, yeah, I mean, what they were doing, I mean, these guys were making five to every one of those little cubs was like thirty thousand dollars they would end up making on the fuck i mean it was big fucking business and it's a wild fact to know that there are more tigers living in captivity in america than there are actual tigers in the wild. That's how endangered tigers are. Yeah, I know. I know that the most, yeah. But my question is this, is like, so with a tiger, okay, so what's the other option, the animal rights activist, because I don't want to kill animals either. I'm obviously just kidding. But what's the other option if you don't gas them, what are you supposed to do with them? Because you can't have it in a house as a house pet. I mean, what can you do with it?

Well, here's the first thing. First things first, I want to say, when they introduce Joe Exotic and they introduce all these guys, Doctor whatever his name is, who's not a real doctor, you start to realize pretty quick, like, oh, yeah. Like, whoever had a private reserve in America of exotic animals, animals they're gonna be wild it's not gonna be a normal person like it makes sense that joe exotic what he has is an exotic an exotic zoo full of fucking animals it makes sense that he's a gay gun toting fucking meth head attracting uh you know gay guy who just runs a zoo full of fucking guys who he attracts from

meth i mean it's hysterical to to the point where you know you can't write that shit you can't write it i knew i'm telling you i knew as soon as i met as soon as they showed joe exotics two husbands i knew both of them were not gay yeah 100 i knew 100 both of those guys were not gay at all and then when they really revealed that i'm like yeah of course i know that those guys weren't fucking gay i just i love the fact that like meth must be really really good yeah that kid that kid stuck around for like 14 15 years till he lost every single one of his teeth besides two. He was banging a dude named Joe Exotic and working at a zoo

for meth for 15 years and he's not gay and he doesn't like banging dudes. I mean, meth must be unbelievable. How about the part when that woman got her arm eaten off and just went back to work the next day? I mean, could you imagine just getting your arm eaten off? Yeah, I mean, that woman, yeah.

That woman has – she doesn't know anything else is in the world. I mean, that woman must have, like, taken a bus from somewhere in Inuit country or Alaska. I thought she was Latina. As a matter of fact, when I was watching the documentary, I thought it was Sergio Chacon. I thought that was Blizzy. Yeah, it could have been him. I mean, she definitely looked like she was native of some sort. Didn't she?

Sergio Blizzy doesn't have a finger, and this lady doesn't have an arm. Yeah, she just got a fucking rip right off. And then she was right back to work. Your phone's ringing. Yeah, the thing is, Joe and Zada. Last time your phone rang, we got into a fist fight. Yeah. Where's that episode?

Where's the episode where we fought? Is that on Patreon? Go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge boys. Yeah, we were supposed to put that in the million dollar tier. Did we cut it out? Yeah, that part's cut out. It's on the million dollar tier. Well, if you have a million dollars to the pandemic, go get it. Let's drop the million dollar tier

down to 750,000 because people are struggling. Yeah, right now we'll give you a... I keep getting all these furniture emails saying down 20, 30%. Our Patreons also. We're having a pandemic sale. 15, 30% down. Yeah, it's what it is. I just want to be Savalcano's

Gamar again. Because the fucking... The Tiger King, this is who the cast of characters was. Joe Exotic. Then there was Jeff Lowe, who's a bald guy who wears a do-rag and drives a motorcycle

and somehow scams people into thinking he's got a mansion when he rents everything. And somehow he fucking... Somehow he fucking somehow he fucking he convinced joe exotic to give him his zoo and then the other characters are two meth heads one of which is six six and was fucking jacked and a good looking kid blew his head off blew his own fucking head off the other guy ends it up ends up banging up a girl and getting new teeth and because i saw it on facebook that he finally got new teeth and then the other guy who

worked there has no fucking legs and then the woman is missing an arm and they just are raising tigers for kids to pet them i mean one of you could not write this fucking story because make no mistake that seems like something the history ahin has created every single member every single participant in that documentary looks like they're here for a good time and not a long time. I mean, one of the guy's names is Bogvon. Bogvon Dark Antle. Cause Joe Exotic,

the story of Joe Exotic really sounds like a, it sounds like a pilot that Thomas Dale would pitch while he's on meth. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly Thomas Dale. Okay. I have two straight boys and they're in my harem, and I'm a gay fucking lion tamer,

and we're in the middle of the woods, and then there's this bitch that's trying to take us down, and I'm fucking feeding them meth, and we're playing with tigers, and let's do it. Cuz, make no mistake, though, Joe Exotic's husband, the guy who killed himself, Travis Maldonado,

will get cracked open and cleaned out. Yeah, he's a good-looking kid. He just had one weakness, and that weakness is meth. It's just meth. As Tim Dillon would say, no good. No good. And, you know, and obviously the whole, the other big character, Carol Baskin,

you know, it's like some people loved her, some people hate her, but make no mistake, whatever you think about it, the lady killed her husband and the tigers and there's really no way around that and if you don't think that happened you got another thing coming make no mistake that tiger was shitting out old man white bones for about a week yeah i mean there's no way she didn't kill her husband so that's what really made the story interesting and by the way fucking we're gonna put up spoiler alert on this if you haven't seen it you know fucking mike

make sure there's a big spoiler alert a chiron or whatever but i mean that's what really fucking makes the story gives the story a twist is when we find out that she inherited all of her husband's millions the guy was millionaire and his first family didn't get anything and the guy just disappears he disappears in the thin air because make mistake, if you ever don't hear from me, check Tiger Pits in Oklahoma. Yeah. There's a couple of people that want to cash out my life insurance and they've watched the documentary for research purposes. Yeah.

No, if you disappear, I'm putting the fucking police, I'm putting them straight to Sunset Park. And we're looking in every basement in Sunset Park and we will find your bones. Yeah, because make no mistake, Puerto Ricans love exotic animals. And I know for a fact, somebody in Sunset Park has a tiger right now. Yeah. I remember the late great Angelo Lozado told me that he had an uncle who had ducks in the bathtub. He had actual ducks that he lived in his bathtub. Well, I mean, yes, Sergio Chacon, a great friend of the show. I mean, Well, I mean, yes, Sergio, Sergio Chacon, our great friend of the show. I mean, he's got he's got a mini zoo in his one bedroom apartment in New York City. I mean, the guy's a mini zoo. On Friday, he texted me and he was like, Oh, if you and you and your daughter want to watch on Instagram live every Friday at whatever it is 6pm. So go check it out at Sergio Chacon. He's doing a thing where he, they, him and his daughter talk to their pets and they take their pets out for Instagram live.

I'm like, how do you have this many fucking pets? Yeah. I mean, the kid, he's got a lot of snakes. He's got about eight snakes. He's got a exotic cat and he's got a pit bull.

Does he have anything else? Does he have any lizards? He probably has some. Yeah. Here's the thing. If you go to, if you go to Sergio Chacon's house and he he offers you uh uh an ice cream from the freezer if you open it up he might grab

a dead rat by accident that's just what's going on he's got dead rats in his freezer and he's got snakes venomous snakes that he thinks his family is okay with make no mistake his family lives in fear every day yeah they do Sergio uh Angelo told me that his uncle and his uncle's cousin or something, they got hungry one night when they got drunk because they used to be drunk a lot. They were drunks. And they got drunk, and they decided – and the ducks were his pets, and they lived in the bathtub. He would fill up – you hear what I'm saying?

He would fill up the bathtub every day for the ducks. So the bathtub was where the ducks live i don't know where they showered they may have used the sink or whatever or maybe he just hopped in with the ducks but make no mistake he had pet ducks that lived in the bathtub and then they got drunk once and they they were hungry and they decided to eat the ducks so they walked and ate the ducks in an apartment in the bronx that is fucking hilarious. It's fucking hilarious, yeah. And it's no wonder there's a lot of coronavirus up there. I mean, yeah.

I mean, you know. If you don't think Haitians in the Bronx have fucking goats in their basement and they're slaughtering them there, you got another thing coming. Well, I know that's the good part about like some of the neighborhoods where like, you know, some members of our community

have like a lot of animals. It's like they don't have to go to the supermarket. They'll just eat their pets. Yeah. They'll just eat their pets. Cause here's a, here's a fun little fact that, uh, uh, Vanitya found through doing the research at Tiger King. Cause you know, obviously tigers are illegal.

Um, you can't have them. And that was a big emphasis on everything. Like it's very, very hard to get a license to even do this. But she said in New York, there's a loophole in New York called the big five band. It leaves out members of hyena, which include the art wolf striped hyena spotted hyena. People mistakenly think these are part of the canine family,

but they're in their own group and more closely related to cats. So technically hyenas are legal in the state of new york that uh yeah and that's why most of our fan base is in new york yeah that's what it is if you if you were to if you were you couldn't write this story man i mean when they when they when they told us how carol haskins met her husband her second husband right i'm going like i was like is this true like is this how the rest of america lives are they is it this isn't this wild outside of major cities yeah you haven't seen it most of you've seen it by now again spoiler alert but basically the guy's driving down the road he sees her like in slippers and a robe crying

and he goes and he picks her up she says no she won't get in the car he tries again she says no and then he stops it pulls over again and he's got a gun on the passenger seat and he says here get in and hold this to my head just so you know you're safe and if i try anything shoot me in the face and then they got married and started a fucking tiger zoo i mean why the story sounds like it was written by thomas dale on fucking meth that's what it is it sounds like one of my made up fucking fables because it's real and her new husband i mean carol basket's new husband that guy is fucking i mean he is the definition of a cuck but make no mistake when they showed that picture of them when they were both in

tiger print and he was on his knees with the chain around his neck? If you don't think I went on Amazon immediately and bought that exact getup, you got another thing coming. I immediately hit Amazon because that's an essential for me. Apparently, so Tampa, because that's where they met the first husband,

Nebraska Avenue is notorious for sex trade. She was just chilling on the street. It was suggestive that she was probably a woman of the night. That's why he went and said, I want to talk to you. Then she's like, we just talked. Then she goes ahead and says

that they spent the night together. That was really funny. What do you think the chances are Mike Mush immediately just put Nebraska Avenue in his Google Maps and saw how far it was to drive? Wow, that's interesting. That is extremely interesting. Benatia won't show her face.

The great thing about this story is like you don't, like Chris was alluding to at the beginning, you don't really know morally who to side with. It's so morally ambiguous. It's like making a murderer. It's like there's camps that think he should be out. There's camps that don't think they did it. And then you look at the subreddits and they prove it.

It's the same thing with this guy. It's like, I don't know. And then, of course, now he's opened up to full investigation on the internet. They just found that clip of him saying that he wants to be able to say the N word from years ago. So now, you know, now he's out with any fancy hat or gone.

So he's done. It's just, he's done now. I mean, yeah. I mean, if that was, if you don't think that Dick,

that kid has said the Edward once a day till his 40th birthday. I mean, you got another thing coming. I mean, he's a fucking gay guy named Joe exotic. Who's got a pet zoo in fucking oklahoma i mean what do you think's going on yeah he was yeah exactly it's like the thing is with a guy like it's like people just want i mean they want this pretend fucking life it's like yeah he's you know i mean he's got illegal tigers you know i mean he like he convinces straight guys that they're gay and then he marries them.

He had two husbands at one time. Of course, he's killing tigers and saying the N word. It's like, what do you want here? It's like a pandemic right now. How much more do we have to fucking lie? Can that stop now? Can the lies of just like, I don't want to hurt your feelings stop? It's like listen guy what do you want me to tell you there's some people that do better in life than others and they usually look the same and i i can't i'm not a fucking scientist okay i'm not neil degress tyson over here i don't know i can't figure out how many fucking dollar bills it takes

to get from here to the sun but you know i can tell you that there's one group that doesn't have to worry about the stimulus package. Wait, Shaq Sheehan, I'm just kidding. Mike, wait, Shaq Sheehan. It's just a joke. Yeah, it's just a fucking joke. Because I do have to worry, because make no mistake, I applied for the stimulus package, and they said, you applied already.

I said, what do you mean? And then they sent me a picture, and it was Barney Rubble. So make no mistake, he's getting my government checks and my small business bailout because he's got my social security number. That's bad. Does he really got it? It's what it is. I can't change it now. It's too late.

Jesus Christ. Barney Rubble fucking gets in there. He gets his fingers in there. I might just invite him over tomorrow and tell him to take the bus to get him out of my life. Yeah, it's just what it is cuz make no mistake grandkids if you want to get rid of uh if you got a pesky fucking grandpa right now you just give him a kick and it's over it's like giving him a bullet yeah yeah yeah i'm kidding i'm just joking love you dad i love you dad i know you listen to the podcast does he listen you think yeah he figured out a way so i mean he he's heard you tell the world that you

know he's gotten in your pockets a few times and he's still trying to get in salute to you yeah i'm just kidding just because you never know because reality has always suggested with me yeah so i i'm making the whole thing up don't worry about it you're throwing a lot at everybody yeah so in your conclusion who do you who did you like the most and who do you side with are you more of an animal rights carole Baskin bitch, or are you on the side of Dr. and Joe Exotic? Because make no mistake, I'm a kid that lives life in the fast lane, and I like to have a good time.

So I'm team Joe Exotic. I want to be his third husband. You do, right? Yeah, Carole Baskin has fumes, and I just don't like her energy at all. She looks like a crazy bitch, and I don't like her, and I think she definitely killed her husband. And it just seems like, you know,

I mean, Joe exotic. I mean, he's got multiple husbands. He's got guns. His employees get their arms eaten off. I mean, I just want to go take a peek.

I want to just go roll around and, and move around the zoos in Oklahoma with Joey exotic. Yeah. And here's another thing we forgot. He, he makes country music songs and there's no, it's pretty good. There's no way that's him.

There's no way that's his voice. I think he has somebody write them and sing them, and then he just pretends it's him Milli Vanilli style. Because that is not his voice. I mean, the kid's got a squeak voice. He's like, hi, my name's Joe Exotic. It's real hot. No, that is not him.

Because when he sends – those songs sound like Kelly Chestnut or whatever the fuck his name is. Ben Atiyah, who do you – do you – because here's the thing. This is why it's morally ambiguous is because Carol Haskins, she rescues these animals, right? She rescues them, and she wants to put an end to them and shut them down because of all the tigers they euthanasia, they euthanize. But then she ends up doing the same thing, which is evident.

She ends up having a zoo and she ends up paying her employees nothing because she takes advantage of the fact that they are animal lovers and they just want to work in a rescue. And she claims, you know, she charges and she claims that she charges because it costs so much to to feed these animals, which it does. But of course, you know, she's fucking taking a profit like all these non for profits do. They fucking figure out ways to pay themselves. So at the end of the day, Joe Exotic does have a good point that she's kind of a little bit of a hypocrite in that sense. Venetia, who do you're woke and fucking dope? Who do you side with? Are you team Joe Exotic?

Are you team Carol Haskins? So real quick, did you guys notice that in the beginning of the show, they say how Baskins had started this park because she wanted to breed big cats. And then she turned a new leaf and she's like, I want to save them. And then at the end of the show, they show Joe saying, oh, I started this park because

I want to help these cats and bring them back into the wild. So they both started like, and they reversed their roles. So, I mean, I'm kind of team Joe. I have to be honest. Wow. Even though he wants to say the N word? No, well, not. I'm kind of team Joe. I have to be honest. Wow. Even though he wants to say the N word. And no, well,

not, well, I just found that out yesterday, but I say that I'm team Joe. He said yesterday. You just said fucking yesterday. Wow. Is vanity is a liar.

Do you not live on the upper West side? Do you live in Bay Ridge? Yeah. You're from fucking Bay Ridge. Cause you just said yesterday, you let one fucking slip. She doesn't want to show a face. Cause she's my neighbor.

Yesterday. Yesterday. one fucking slip. She doesn't want to show her face because she's my neighbor. Yesterday? Yesterday? Okay, yesterday. Oh, shit. Anyways, I'm team Joe. What are you, Giannis? Here's the thing. I just want to ask Veneti. Even though he... I think he

was trying to have her killed, which is kind of hilarious. Oh, so funny. But she deserves it because She killed her husband. It's karma. So you think so? So Chris, you think she deserved it? I think she if she killed it pretty evident she killed her husband. But then again, there's all editing in a documentary. So you really don't the truth is nobody knows but the people that know and Joey Exotic seems like seems like he's going to be doing a 20 plus year prison sentence and he's not going to make it out

alive. So we're done with Joe Exotic. But Carol but carol baskin you know what i should ask my mother i should ask my mother to watch and look into her eyes because she'll be able to ask jesus christ directly now right if he did or if she did or not my mother just know she asked jesus directly now how funny is joe exotics uh when he was doing his internet show when he put carol gaskin as the mannequin and then he just blew the mannequin's brains out. He's like, this is what's going to happen to you, Carol Gaskin. And then he shot the mannequin with a real gun in the head. I mean, the kid is out of his fucking mind.

He became obsessed with her. And then he did send another fucking criminal meth head. He paid him $3,000. I mean, this is how these people are like. They live in their own world. In Oklahoma, there's like no people. It's flat. It's poor.

And then like she lives in Florida, you know, in places where you can have exotic animal private zoos. This is where these people live. To think that a hitman would go kill someone in another state for $3,000. I mean, who the fuck, to get someone killed, it's going to cost you at least 50 to 100 grand in New York City. Cuz, make no mistake,

if this lockdown continues and our Patreon numbers continue to fall, we may be in that same boat. So send us three grand and we may be able to kill whoever you need come July. And we should, but isn't that funny to think that

all the prices and all the cost of living, no matter what it is in different places adjusts like in new york if you're gonna have somebody killed it's gonna cost you a hundred grand just because it's new york if you go to oklahoma you can get somebody to kill someone for three grand three thousand dollars it's good to know that the fucking the hitman for higher prices run run parallel neck and neck with the real estate prices. Now, if you had to trade places with somebody, would you trade places with the woman who got her arming off by the tiger or the guy with no legs? Who would you rather be? That's a good damn, Chrissy.

That's a good one. You're on today, bud. You're on today, and I know you're fucking on because you do like this and you smell your lip. That's what I know you're in. I'm disgusting. It comes to make no mistake. I think I'm going to have to sleep at your house tonight because it's getting hot in here.

It's getting hot in here. You're in and out. I don't know if our fans have picked that up now that we're doing Zoom, but Chrissy definitely likes to do this and then sniff his lip. It's just something he does. It's just what it is. That's a fucking damn good question. That couldn't be the best Joe Exotic question so far.

And also, before Giannis answers, I want people to go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and tell us who would you want to be? A woman who got her army and offered a guy with no legs from Tiger King. Because, actually, can we post that on the Patreon right now? Venetia, can you throw it out on the Patreon right now? Because that is a great question.

And then we'll talk about it in the next episode. And fucking post it. Before I answer this question, I want to say I hope you guys enjoyed the Thomas Dale fucking episode. Oh, that's... What's going up first? Thomas Dale. Yeah, I mean,

talk about Joe Exotic. That was a wild one. So I hope you enjoyed it. And Mike, real quick, real quick, before you answer this, Mike, how's my super chat, live chat doing that I'm supposed to be doing?

But if anybody ever sees this, they know it's Mike answering the questions on my Comedy Central YouTube. How's it going? Well, it was at 500 and all of a sudden it went to 130 because they let the commercial break pause in there. I mean, it's just...

I mean, what are they doing? I mean, what are they... So wait, so there was a commercial break in the middle? Like it just... It goes to black for like 10 seconds. People thought it was over. Yeah. I mean, it's just, I mean, what are you going to do?

You just can't. Were people asking any good questions or not really? Not really. Also, people thought it was going to be a new special. Oh, I see. But they haven't seen it yet, though. A lot of people were like, oh, this is the old one. So they had seen it before, though. A lot of people were like, oh, this is the old one. So they hadn't seen it before.

Oh. All right. Well, if they keep it up, I hope they keep it up. I think they do keep them up, Chris. So I think you're going to be okay because people will fucking see it in the search.

People search your name. It's just one more thing that they can check out, which is great. Like, that's all. You just want... It's basically like a well-produced stand-up clip for the internet. So you just want it's basically like a well-produced stand-up clip for the internet so you just want it up there how do you answer the question

which is a very good question and then i want to hear yours mikey and venetia's but i am gonna go with the guy with no legs because yeah i he he created some contraption i mean the guy moves a little slower but he could still move around and he's got both his hands to like eat and like you know he could gesticulate with both like i'm a greek kid i need to be able to gesticulate i need to be able to fucking use my hands when i talk because i'm long days yanni and i like to fucking go on rants so ranters need hands um plus i just rather would be a guy it's a little too late for me to end up being an inuit woman you know i don't want to have all the problems that go with being an inuit woman because that means i probably can't drink booze because

i'll have like one coors light and that'll kill me so you have the lowest rate of coronavirus if you're an inuit woman they got the lowest rate so far so yeah but that's because it hasn't gotten to them yet but also they have no tolerance for alcohol. So if I have one Coors Light, I'm fucking hooked, and I want to be able to enjoy a beer. I like a fucking cold beer. And if I'm an Inuit woman, the fucking alcohol's going to kill me. I'm going to end up

fucking sleeping on a curb in a reservation. That's no good. Here's the deal. The guy had no legs, but he was still a white man. It's what it is. And cuz, no matter if you're Inuit or not, no matter if you're inuit you are still a one beer queer and you got a long island republican wife that's gonna call you a faggot either way yeah i mean it's a good question you know in a lot of ways you got to make the joke you know it's like he's still a white guy in america and yeah he could find even though he's got no, the door's still open for him in a lot of places.

No, but here's the real question. The person with one arm, is that a guy or a girl? Because I don't think anybody really fucking knows. I think that was a girl who wants to be a guy. So it might be good to be her because you're closer to transitioning. Good point. I mean, if I come back, because I want to come back trans. 100%. good to be heard because then this because you're closer to transitioning good point i mean you know if i come back because i want to come back trans 100 yeah if i come back i want to come back trans

i think it'll be fun to be thirst sexy that they're sexy yeah now if you're if you have another kid and he's trans you're cool with that i'm cool with it i'd be totally cool with it i'd be totally cool with um with whatever my totally cool with Whatever my kid wants to do Whatever they want to do Now whose hair would you rather have If you could have anybody's hair Do you want to have Joe Exotic's hair or Carol Baskin's hair Who's hair do you want

Joe Exotic's hair is Fucking the party Joe Exotic Joe Exotic right He dyes his hair blonde and he's got a mullet And he wears the fucking Joe Exotic. Joe Exotic, right? Joe Exotic, buddy. He dyes his hair blonde, and he's got a mullet, and he wears the fucking JoeExotic.tv hat. I'm going with that. And the kid's got a flamboyant, wild fucking lion.

He wore shirts like, who's the kid who got his, he looked like, he wears like Siegfried and Roy shirts. Yeah, no. Why do gay kids love tigers? I don't, because they have stride i mean because they're like colorful patterns maybe and they got stripes i don't know but it is interesting because the gays do they love fucking tigers yeah they love sigfried and roy were a gay gay kids and one of them got eaten i mean you know these are tragic things for some reason these people who

want to be around exotic animals seem to be very eccentric and like i said before that makes sense because you'd never have a normie fucking go open an exotic uh animal zoo but uh i mean fucking gay kids like tigers yeah they fucking love tigers and um to be honest with you i like animals but if it's between lions, tigers, and bears, I'm more of a lions guy than tigers. Dude, are you looking at the picture of Joe Exotic that Mike had just put up? Yeah, I'm looking at this picture. I mean, he is one of the biggest characters that the United States has ever. I am just glad. Look, he didn't kill anyone. He was planning to kill him. So at the end of the day, we can still kind of celebrate him a little bit because he's a complicated

character who sent a hit man for $3,000 to go across straight lines to kill a high profile woman, which is fucking hilarious. The whole thing's hilarious. But look at this fucking guy. This guy looks like he works at a fucking rest stop in Phoenix. Yeah. And now he's the most famous man in the world. Yeah. I mean, only America that could happen.

Because make no mistake, he looks like one of our fans. So he looks like a guy that would love the history of Hyenas. If somebody can know Joe Exotic, find out what he thinks of history of Hyenas. I mean, the kid...

Me and my wife were watching it, and when he lost his shit, whenever he got angry at Carol Gaskin, me and my wife just started dying laughing. It's so funny. It's so funny when he calls her a bitch or whatever he's like that fucking bitch because he's like a tough kind of like oklahoma guy who carries a gun and plays

with tigers and convinces straight guys who want meth to suck his dick but he's also a catty little fucking gay guy and he has it out for that bitch. He keeps calling her a bitch. Yeah, and he has a fucking vendetta against that bitch. So... Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. Or Venetia, let me ask. Did we miss anything big on the Tiger King? Because I'm almost spinning out.

I know. You guys have covered everything. I'm starting to get lightheaded because, make no mistake, cooped up Chrissy turns into needs it now Chrissy real quick. So fun. Would you guys think about all the polygamy going on? It wasn't just Joe Exotic. It was like the Doc guy

as well. And Jeff, they all just see like for example, Jeff Lowe was like, you got to have a little pussy to get a lot of pussies. Yeah, I mean, that was why. Yeah, it's this thing where it's like a lot of people always say things like, you know, guys are,

guys are dirtbags guys. It's like guys do what women let them get away with. So it's like the guy was telling the truth. He's like, I see what, what, what, what he would do with Jeff.

Lo would do if you haven't seen it, he would sneak baby tiger. I mean, this is the funniest story I've ever heard in my entire life. He would take baby tigers, put them in a suitcase, and sneak them up into Vegas hotel rooms, and then that would entice women to come to his hotel room

to pet the baby tigers, and then he would bang them out with his girlfriend. Now, Gene, he says the baby tigers attract girls, and then you see that it does. So it's like, what do you want me to do about it, guy? It's like women like guys with baby tigers. Even if they got do-rags and they got no money.

What makes you more pure than a baby tiger? I mean, almost nothing. Venetia, would you go to a guy's hotel room if he told you you could bet a baby tiger? There's a little allure to it, right? I mean, a baby tiger, yes, but wouldn't i wouldn't what if what if he had a baby tiger and his and his hat matches jordan's would you go then i don't know let's be honest you like effeminate guys who who who claim that they're straight you know know? So Joe Exotic is kind of right up your alley.

Venetia would date a guy that looks and acts exactly like Joe Exotic. That's her type. We found Venetia with time. Joe Exotic. Here's the thing. If Joe Exotic was walking around Williamsburg with a fucking eyebrow ring, nose ring, a mullet,

and a Siegfried and Roy shirt, and he was holding a baby tiger, nobody would say anything to him. Because if Joe Exotic wasn't in prison right now, he'd have a half hour special on comedy central. If Joe exotic walked in holding a baby tiger, wearing that animal, wearing that shirt and that whole outfit,

carrying a baby tiger. And he walked right into urban outfitters. Not one person would say anything except welcome, sir. That's it. Cause if you think Joe exotic is in prison right now, sucking dick for Snickers, you got another thing coming. Yeah. If't think joe exotic right now fucking is figuring out ways

to sneak meth into that fucking florida jail to get straight guys to suck his dick and pet his baby tiger which is a tattoo on his arm because they're on meth they don't know the difference you got another thing coming cuz if you think if you don't think that when you look through joe exotic's visitor registrations forms you don't see the when you look through joe exotic's visitor registrations forms you don't see the name chris stefano you got another thing coming i'm the new janice rossi i'm visiting joe exotic in jail like it's fucking ray leona if you don't think for one second because of this recession that's coming and maybe a depression and the fact that we can't do live comedy for a long time that i didn't google how to start an exotic animal farm. You got another thing coming.

If you don't think in about 10 months time, you're going to be my new kid's godfather. You got another thing. Yeah. The New York census just went up one more Puerto Rican. We got to stop the podcast. You know what your new nickname is to end this podcast? What?

Chrissy Entanglements. That's what it is. No, my new nickname is Chrissy Popular. Well, this has been the episode. Fucking Joe Exotic. Everyone's seen it. We're going to tell you at the beginning of the episode, so you probably didn't watch this. So you're coming to it watching it after you

watched it it is absolutely wild it's worth the hype go check it out here's the deal though thank you to our patreon well you know we need your support more than ever patreon.com slash bay ridge boys we're gonna pump up the content we're gonna keep going and we we know there's a holocaust about to happen in two days yeah we just know that a lot of you guys are going to just go bye-bye. And it's what it is. You will have room here. Your space is still open when you want to come back. We know people haven't been getting jobs.

But why don't you go ahead and also apply for that small business loan and then get back on the Patreon. Can we read the Patreon names? You want to go to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys and read the names? Yeah, let's do that. I sent you those names. Do you get them? Yeah, Mike.

Cuz you're spitting in my eye even over Zoom. Venetia, how you doing? Venetia, was this a fucking snooze fest? It wasn't a snooze fest, but I was covering my face a lot. And yeah, we'll definitely discuss. Okay. That's bad. We got to cut some parts out,

right? Uh, yeah, but you guys are babies. This is a lot of names. There's a lot of patron names, baby boy. Let's have fun with those.

You know, I was hoping putting my hair like this was going to put me in a better mood. It just did it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Um,

okay. First up. Oh, nice. We're going to start off with a uh nice jewish guy joshua pearl screwed it ben dustin bowell james redmond pearl he got it he's a screwed in kid he got it right now because he knows we're about to lower the price stocks alone knock one down so you're gonna see a lot of jews there's a lot of screwed in kids now they've like we've been waiting for this moment yeah um dustin bootwell james redmond bill hoffer connor mclaughlin yanni spunkin peter um thick dick fuck boy mystic uh credit where credit's due good credit credits do um remember anyone who's into the podcast uh new to the podcast, we will pick a PPW,

Pseudo Penis of the Week, for the best name. Rudy the Cutie, no smoothie, but has a skin flute in Chrissy's booty. I made the skin flutes. Where did those come from, the skin flutes? I don't know. Yeah. I know somebody,

the bar in Bay Ridge, Skin Flint, somebody sent me a, somebody went and fixed it and made it Skin Flutes. Rudy, Rudy, oh, sorry. Adrian, Father Bees, Pre-Op, Tuck Back, Itty Bitty, Greek Squeak, Musaka. It's a good one. Good try.

Tyler, Huffin, Cute Toots, Fumes, McCallum. Ryan Cooper, Bud, the Dyslexic, Ying Yang, make no mistake. Ryan Cooper. Bud, the dyslexic yin-yang. Make no mistake, I'm going to 69 you 96 times. Good one. First pure big laugh. Yeah.

Put it on the list. Devin. Yep. I'm gay, Stennett. He went for simple and good. Danny ran out of free content. Now I'm not a toot. Nice.

Honest. Yeah. That's more of just, hey, guys, to give you a little information of who I am. Now I'm not a toot. Nice. Honest. Yeah. Just that. That's more of just, Hey guys, give you a little information of who I am and why I'm here. Damien. Damien.

It's not little, but make no mistake. It's not big Lyman. Put on the list. Originality. Then we got Brian, Alyssa, straight up FFF for the SS.

Shut up and get in the chamber, babe. No, we move on. We're moving off from that one. Jack, Nathan E. Parker, Ariel Pica, Megan Jeffrey, John McCoy, Cuzzy Wuzzy, who was

fond of Muzzies until the Towers went down in the round of 14. He's going to be the winner. He's going to be the winner. He's going to be the winner. He's going to be the winner. Okay, start that one, Mikey. Yeah. Lane, see Kyle, mine, fashion, Fuhrer, Schultz.

Okay. Yeah, we'll pass those ones. Johnny, I tucked my sack and it killed my dad via heart attack, fraudman. It's a good one. I feel bad because it's a... The Clyde Drexler. These are going to be a lot of Drexlers. Carl Alexander.

Jack, the situation's new boyfriend's got fumes, can it? Drexler. Elmer Blanco. Tommy McScruden. Davis, the German gender bender, lets Chrissy D bend him over. Okay.

Thomas Minarchik Jr. Sloppy Sacagawea who got cracked open for that cute continental trip okay went for it isaiah monzone hunter ambos lindsey i would ask christy to put his pink hold on lindsey i would ask christy to put his p p and my v but I know he likes the D. Okay. Like it? That was more of an insight. That was more of an insight. I appreciate that, Lindsay. Snapchat CDTV.

The only kosher piece of meat you'll ever need to eat. Nice. That's a good one. Drexler. Chrissy Canole Cream and the Suzuki Twink Make My Glue Gun Shoot New Cum. No, sorry. Jew Cumink Make My Glue Gun Shoot New Cum. No, sorry. Ju-Cum. Make My Glue Gun Shoot Ju-Cum.

Went for it. Drexler. Sorry about that. Sorry about that. My phone's cracked. The baby dropped my phone. So you're a victim of the crack. Sorry. Yeah. Kyle Resnick. George Jr. Randall Bleasley.

Joanne Gallaghan here for the content, Gary, a.k.a. Chrissy D is Queen B, and I'm trying to catch a sting. It's a good one. Inventive. But, you know, I mean, the Muzzy Kid is just, it's too hard to beat right now. Okay. But that's nice. It's nice to have a real big one in there.

Josh, Jesus, the Mexican engineering student, will cut your grass and tutor you in math. That's a goodie. Goodie. I canceled Flagrant 2 for my Big Fat Greek comic and Schindler's... Okay. Yeah.

We just move on for those. Celia O'Connor. Celia O'Connor. Chrissy Third Reich action figure, squeeze my lunch lady ass and I shoot glue. Okay. This has got a lot of Nazi jokes in this list. I mean, it's funny to think about squeezing your lunch lady ass and you shoot glue.

That's funny. Yeah. It's good. But you know, you know, they got the third, whenever they, yeah,

it's just, we're, we're, we're Nazi joke heavy on this list. Okay. Um, Rashad half muzzy half Leroy, but full third Reich dyke boy toy.

Yeah. We got a lot of Nazi jokes. I'm Third Reich Dyke's buddy. Yeah, real good, real good. We don't condone that stuff, so. We can't, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lukey, Long Peace Parker coming in to kickstart Chrissy D's heart by tongue punching his fart box.

It's a goodie. It's a goodie. Still not going to win. These are great, though. They're great. As horrific as Nuke and the Japs was, it was clearly a goodie. It's a goodie. Still not going to win. These are great, though. They're great. As horrific as nuking the Japs was, it was clearly a good strategy. Okay. Jesus.

Wait, Shanchi. You can't have this. You can't have this. Ross Arsini. It's Smithtown Water here to crack open and clean out your daughter. Okay. Take a pause for one second. You know what's funny about this?

It's like much like us, our fans, we're all a little rough around the edges right now. We're coming in a little too strong right now. A little too strong. Next one, I'm a muzzy, but Jesus is my buddy. Okay. I mean, I would put him on the list just as a token of appreciation. Yeah.

Paul Stone, Cameron, Catapult the white walkers trump 2020 uh me son johansson desi garcia israel israel beaner average size wiener rodriguez earthworm jim david we need yanni p and chrissy d on jre okay thank you uh alex sauce monkey okay Alex Sauce Monkey, okay, peace, but confidence of guy named Leroy Indelicato. Good one. Goody. Yanni Yanni Duda, Chrissy has a hoo-ha, Maurice is a dirty poodle. Nice. That one cracked my wife bad.

Okay, so now we got some competition. We got somebody in the finals right now. We got somebody in the finals. Final four, at least. Yeah, you put them in the finals. I have a feeling it's going to be Utah Jazz versus the Bulls, though. Okay, Rob Haddad, Jake Robinson, Ethan, watch over Vinatil while she sleeps to keep her safe. That's another goodie.

That's another goodie. Sugar in the tent chocolate. That's another goodie. Joshie tank chocolate That's another goodie Joshy all whitey except my brown eyes Okay That's a bad read from Chrissy Sometimes it's going to happen Sorry about that I got a crack in the phone Patron saint of FFs

S.Doss J.SuckMySocks Dip a toe in my fart box I do it for the lollipops We got three of the finals Suck my socks. Dip a toe in my fart box. I do it for the lollipops. We got three of the finals. We got three of the finals. Okay, we're almost rounding out the final four here.

Michael Muzzy is going to panic when they see this white Germanic. Sabie, okay. Thank you. Ryan, Bo Byan, I can only come while crying. Benedict Trump 2020. Real funny. Tyler Lindsay, Nico Halams, Alex, white folks, but I drink my coffee, Leroy Brenner, not mean. Um.

That's real good. That's a throwback to white folks, the pimp we talked about. Mario, my daughter says her father won't let her date alt-right Andy. Okay. Tyler, peeing like a non-mean, too bad I look like Goose Gossage. Good one. Drexler. Rudy Toots shoots glue on Chrissy's glutes. Rudiger. Okay.

Brian the fuck boy squeak with a fumeless fart star Max and Steuben's Hanson. Okay. Went for it. Susan Lee Lopez recent transracial Greek hoping to give Vanity a my peace Papa Docus. Dubins Hanson. Okay. Went for it. Susan Lee Lopez. Reston, transracial Greek,

hoping to give Vanity and my D's peace, Papadakis. Is he on the list or is he an honorable mention? Let's just read out the rest and then we'll pick the fourth one and then we'll read them out again. Yeah.

Tony, two-time toot. Wish it was Chrissy. Give me your glue time, Costa. Okay. Robert Foster. Baby gorgeous cutie.

Andrea Gagliani. Chrissy plant-based. Finish on my face and clean me out like toothpaste. That's a goodie. Drexler. The Armenian ass assassin. Bona Hamcock. Wait a second.

Wait a second. The Armenian ass assassin is one of those simple but goodies. That's a quick shot to the head. Yeah. That a quick one that one's a cracked mic so we got to put you think we put him on the list because one of us got cracked or no i think he's a director but it is really good okay drexler okay um the armenian uh banana hammock 55 hunter Fruit Loop Fucking Jew Dick Tuckin' Fumi Okay That will crack my wife Drake Tootie Booty Drank My Glue Smoothie

Monroe Dylan Coloni Then we got Kai Cracks Open And Cleans Out Sauce Monkey Toots Tastes Like Prejute Tiba The attempt was... I don't think he

nailed the landing. Clayton. Then we got Yaya's cookies dipped in... Hold on. I don't know. Yaya's cookies dipped in Grandy's Leroy Trump 2020.

I don't know. Went for it. Steve Miller, 46. Demetrius Grissom. Emily Borsa. Samantha Tootie with the booty, so crack me open, Jones. Chrissy D. and Yanni P. It's me, Donnie T.

Trump 2020. Brucie, pushing down the gay, I need a blue chew, bad Franks and beans. Karen Quispy, Paul Hayo, Josh Wolver, Sean Berg, Tommy Salami, hung like Sadami, cause situation with the baby Bobby.

That's the fourth. That's the fourth. We got our four? Yeah, that's our four. That's the fourth. That's the fourth. Mike, keep going. You want to just end there then? We got our four? Yeah, that's our four. Just wait a minute. Mike, can you? Is there anyone else? Is that it?

No, Mike, why don't we stop it there? Did we read enough, you think? We've read enough, but we're pretty caught up. Okay. Read it there. All right. So can we call it the final four, Mike? We got Cuzzy Wuzzy, who was fond of Muzzy's until the towers went down.

Ladder 14. I mean. That's the one seed. That's the tough one to beat. Yanni, Yanni, dude-ocracy, has a hoo-ha, Maurice is a dirty puta. That's a two seed. Oh, that's a two. Suck my socks, dip a toe on my fart box,

I do it for the lollipops. That might be the baby's favorite. Yeah. What's the fourth? And then Tommy Salami hung like Sadami because it caused a situation with the baby mommy. I mean, can we just do a...

I mean, that's tough. That's one of the tough you know this that was a lot there was a lot of rough around the edges ones we had a lot of nazi jokes for some reason but then we had four maybe all-time greats right there so that's really hard for me venetian which one do you like um i like the marisa but that one that was funny should we give my wife a vote? Which one did you like? Britt? That was the...

Yeah. She doesn't remember the one she loved. No, the puta one. That one where you're singing along. Oh, the Marisa one. That's two votes for the Marisa. Wow. I'm going with the Loud of 14 kid. Used to be fine. I'm not sure if 9-11 happened. Loud of 14. So that 9-11 happened ladder 14

so that's one vote for me Chrissy and Mike it's up to you Mike the ladder 14 that's two and two we got two versus two Chrissy you're the deciding vote read them one more time for me Mikey

Chrissy has a hoo-ha Marisa is a dirty poo-ta. And Cuzzy Wuzzy was fond of Muzzy's until the towers went down. Ladder 14. I'll say Cuzzy Wuzzy's ladder 14. That's the winner. Cuzzy Wuzzy's won it. You won it. That's it.

I mean, those were four goodies, though. It was great. They were almost tied. It was an overtime victory. That was it. That came down to one person's vote. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We're going to start coming up with a plan to come to you every single week. So join the matriarchy. Tell friends.

We're still going. We're going strong. We're happy to be on all things comedy. Hello, Mr. Burr. How you doing? This is the first episode that we're doing for them, and we came out of the gate swinging. Swinging. And yeah, go to and we came out of the gate swinging. Swinging!

And yeah, go to Patreon. We will read the Patreon names. It's just a little bit of lag, but make no mistake, we're going to start doing episodes for people who are dropping off Patreon and that's going to be another episode you're going to want to hear because we're going to rip them a new fucking asshole. Yeah, you're not, you're no longer going to be able to just walk out the door without

getting roasted. We want to make it a little bit harder for you to leave because now we need to really make this into a cult. We're going to start using cult rules to keep you. Well, because the biggest saving grace for us so far has been that, thank God, the United States, President Trump and Governor Cuomo are considered auto mechanics essential services or else we would have lost everybody. Yeah, we would have really. That's our whole fan base is the mechanics. Yeah, I mean, that's it. Thank God. Salute to Governor Cuomo. I like that

fucking kid. He's a strong leader right now. He's got nipple rings. He's got nipple rings and it is what it is. So thank you for listening and pretty soon we're going to announce our plan for going daily. So we'll see you soon.