History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 144 - What Happened In Waco?

Episode Date: May 6, 2020

The Cuzzies are still in quarantine binge watching  Netflix and they discuss their latest watch, Waco!  Chrissy and Yanni dive into the WILD events of the 51day standoff in between federal agents and a Christian sect led by David Koresh in Waco, Texas. Make no mistake this is a wild one where you’ll be wondering if you should side with the cult leader Koresh or the federal agents!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

ស្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប្រូវតែល All right, welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. Chrissy Cumpleaños, Yanni Yucatan Peninsula. I'm broadcasting live from the beach. Where are you, Yanni? Oh, I'm broadcasting from my old WEPA in the morning backdrop, which I'm going to take off right now. I'm going to choose a virtual setting. And where do I want to go? You know what? I want to go to Long Island.

There you go. Where the Trump 2020. Yeah, that's a virtual background of a backyard in Long Island. And as you can tell by the backyard, this house votes Republican. It's what it is. I can see the cameras in the Island. And as you can tell by the backyard, this house votes Republican. It's what it is. I can see the cameras in the background. Cuz, we got a wild episode today about Waco, Texas, or as Venetia calls it, Waco, Texas. And we were inspired to do an episode on it because we both watched the Netflix doc,

the Netflix show, which was from FX, called Waco, where, I mean, cuz David Koresh was a wild, wild, wild little cucumber. He was a wild cucumber, and in honor of this episode, I have shaved my beard. I've shaped it up into a Texas gas station owner who wants to get all the immigrant gas station owners out of the country and over the wall. So that's what that haircut says. It says, hey, I'm from Waco, and this is my Texaco, and that one across the street by that towel head needs to get out of here.

Yeah, it's what it is. Cuz, now, let me ask you a question. What, since, I know you got, you know, your wife's pregnant, you've been sleeping on the couch. Have you been moving your monkey, or can you not? Cuz, I mean, moving my monkey has become a very complicated and clandestine operation where I have to sneak around. I can only do it from about two to four in the morning.

And I sneak around into a closet in the dark, put on my phone and I like, you know what? You know what the porn, you know what porn I like? Yeah. Say it. Say it.

I've been getting into women's only porn. It's a lot more sensual. And I think I'm a cuck. Yeah, you're a cuck out, and you're a faggie, because make no mistake, what makes you go pewing and what makes you eventually sploosh your glue is a little sensuality. You like a little sensualness.

I like a little sensualness. It looks a little more real. I need my porn to seem real, like to seem like it's not like, ayas, ayas, give it to me, yas, yas. I want it to seem real, like to seem like it's not like, yes, yes, give it to me, yes, yes. I want to see real. I want it to look like a hookup like you have in real life, you know? I mean, your hookup looks a lot like porn.

Yeah, everybody has to have fakes. Let's just be honest. When a girl is done hooking up with you, she looks like a contractor's boot. Yeah, it's just what it is. I get stumped up because I can't say it too loud. I mean, that'd be terrifying. Are you in San Juan at the beach right now? Yeah, that's where I'm broadcasting you live

from my vacation. We are in San Juan. And yeah, I mean, cuz, I gotta be honest with you. Even though I'm a kid that hates the beach and hates the sand, because I've been cooped up, Chrissy, for so long, I want to go to the beach. You love the sand at the beach, but there's other type of sand that you just want out of your neighborhood.

Yeah, I love the sand. Yeah, that's why, you know, it's interesting because people have been like, people have been like, why do you go outside? Why are you going outside with a mask, a handkerchief covering your nose and your eyes? Why are you doing all that? And I said, because every time I walk outside, I'm walking into a sandstorm. So I have to cover up. There's other places I have to cover up

because you don't want to get any sand in there. I mean, anytime I just go to the grocery store, I mean, make no mistake, I'm braving. I'm taking my life to my own hands because I'm walking through an active, active, active sandstorm in aisle six in the food dynasty. Now, here's the deal, guys.

We love each and every group of people out there. Groups of people aren't the problem. It's individuals that are the problem. These are all jokes. If you don't understand that, well, then just, you know, go watch Jimmy Fallon smash eggs over some guest's face, okay? Because we're just joking.

We love everybody. We love you. We love our fan base. We love our Eastern Hemi fans. We love our Sandcastle fans. We love our ladies. We love our game. We love our Tranny fans.

I mean, we have, literally, I mean, okay, I understand there's podcasts that have bigger audiences than us, so the numbers are bigger, but I'm talking about percentage. We are on par with any podcast in the world right now with the most diverse fan base. I guarantee you we have a decent amount of percentage. We're all over the map. We have fans from everywhere. We do.

We got a lot of black fans. Thank you to Flagrant 2. Yes. We got a lot of Eastern Hemis. We got a lot of Sandra D's. We got a lot of Eastern Hemis. We got a lot of Sandra D's. And we have the biggest, biggest, biggest, biggest trans fan base in the world.

That is a proven fact. We've counted about 14,000 trans people who listen to this podcast. 100%. And I guarantee we have even more Sandra D fans than ever from the Dictator Nemer. Dictator Nemer, it's come out, right? Yeah, I mean, yeah. He trucked that wasn't a natural beach. We're not a natural beach, but sometimes because of modernity, they will

build a beach in viable tourist locations. We became a viable tourist location, and because of Nemer's podcast, he trucked in a beach load of sand. Trucked in a beach load of sand trucked in a beach load of sand now I do every single episode in bathing suit shorts and flip flops because I realize

I'm always at the beach there's always a few Sandy's watching yeah we really that's one of the things that's fascinated me the most because we get all the names of our Patreon members and we just we get DM's all the time and our fan base is highly diverse which just lets you know it's all about having a good time we're just making jokes jokes aren't facts yeah

they're not facts that's what being ironic is about that's what making a joke is about is like we don't mean it we're having fun you know we're poking fun in reality we're all little pieces of dingleberry shit we're all fungus growing on a rock. And S-Low-K-S. Agreed, Bubba's. Now, let me ask you this. Vernon Howell, who we know as David Koresh, the leader of the Branch Davidians, you know, in the 90s when Waco, Texas happened. Not the only leader of the Branch Davidians.

The Branch Davidians are still around today. But Vernon Howell, who would eventually become David Koresh. Fumare or no fumare? Major, major pedophile fumare. Fumare. Okay, so you think he was a pedophile fumare. I don't think. I mean, that's what the evidence bears out. I mean, the kid, you know, if you're in a cult,

every single cult seems like it's based around the leader banging out whoever he wants to bang out to transmit whatever power he has to you. David Koresh was an absolute scumbag. And some of his wives were like 13 and 11 years old. I mean, the kid was an absolute stone cold maniac, sociopath, and pedophile.

That's what it is. Cuz are we a cult or no? We've become a little bit of a cult. It seems like the Joker because like people just start talking and acting like us. And so we're kind of, like, causing havoc in the world. Yeah, so the – When we hey-bert someone and you see the comments underneath, it's just a bunch of maniacs who've attacked someone's page with hey-berts.

Because if you don't think at some point our studio is going to be surrounded by the fucking DEA, just like David Koresh was, you've got enough of it coming. grounded by the fucking DEA, just like David Koresh was, you got another thing coming. Yeah. If you don't think for one second that our studio is going to be guarded by guys with Joker masks and we're going to fight Batman, then you got another thing coming because it's happening. We're losing our mind.

It's quarantine season. It's quarantine season. Okay. So let me just give a brief, brief, brief description about what today, what we're going to be talking about. So the Waco siege, which I'm sure a lot of people have heard of, the Waco siege began in early 1993 when a government raid on a compound near Waco, Texas led to a 51-day standoff between federal agents and members of a millennial Christian sect called the Branch Davidians. The siege

ended dramatically on April 19th, 1993, when fire consumed the compound, leaving 75 people dead, including 25 children. So that's fucking a Baruch. And 51 days, I mean, they had their little mini, they had like a little mini quarantine. Now this Waco thing, if you're a little young,

woke and dope kid, and you don't remember Waco, and you weren't really cognizant for the Clinton administration, Janet Reno was the attorney general at the time. It was her call to let the ATF and whoever, whatever other government guns were down there. Janet Reno, who's a real fucking $3 bill.

She's a real $3 bill. I mean, she's a guy. That's a guy. I mean, literally, man, if you put Janet Rapinoe and Megan Rapinoe next to each other, I don't know who's who. Yeah. And so this was a major, major, major standoff between the government and what was seen as a cult.

And the reason why the government got involved is, this is what's controversial about it, is they got involved because they thought there was like some illegal weapons sales going on and illegal weapons being occupied by the government. The way you close your eyes and roll back and forth, I mean, you're Frank-satting fucking beats. I know, I am, and this freaking thing keeps flowing over me.

I mean, because you're just a little Frank. It's funny to just watch you just rock and sway. Yeah, and so what happened was it was some miscommunication, and they stormed it, and they set it on fire. And this is really significant in American history because the Oklahoma city bombing was because of, it was a retaliation against the government for what they did at Waco. So this pissed a lot of people off because they, they killed people died.

Like Chris said, some children. Yeah. And it was, there's two sides to this story. Some people believe the government was wrong. Some people believe at the end of the day it was David Koresh's fault because he stayed in there and he kidnapped these people

and he was a pedophile and all that. Where do you stand, Chrissy? Or should I say, where does Ridgewood stand on this? Yeah, Ridgewood. Well, see, the thing is, number one, Ridgewood would never vote against its own government. So Ridgewood, you know, David Koresh is a pedophile fuck that deserved to be cooked, you know, like a marshmallow because the government is always right. When you watch the documentary on Netflix, you see that.

I mean, they're clearly trying to make the government look like shit. They're clearly like this is the government's fault because allegedly David Koresh and other high-ranking members of the Branch Davidians said, we don't want a mass suicide. We don't want a mass suicide. And all the other times in history, or multiple of many times in history where the government has used tear gas, it's ended in fire. So a lot of people think that they knew the risk of tear gas ending in fire and killing everyone was very, very high, and that they potentially, the government potentially wanted to kill everyone inside and not have all these witnesses because they knew they fucked up on multiple accounts. So I, because I'm Chrissy

Double Agents, and right now I'm broadcasting live from Puerto Rico, I'm going to say I'm on David Koresh's side, except for obviously the pedophilia. But when I go visit my mother today in Ridgewood, we'll talk about what a scumbag Koresh was and how the government got that one right. Yeah, I think there's no question the government fucked up because people died. So that was not the right move. For me, I'm always all okay. Like even with Kim Jong-un, a couple of weeks ago, I'm like, you know what? Whatever. Let the guy do what he wants. He's a hermit kingdom. I mean, whatever he wants to do with his people i don't give a fuck but then when you start hearing about the harems of 12 13 year old girls that's when you lose chrissy

when you start to when you start to have harems and you start marrying 12 13 year old girls that's when you lose chrissy because i remember when i was a 12 or 13 year old girl and i don't want to i would not want to be a dictator's bride so um i think that's when you lose me so once it was if you're saying it's confirmed and proven that koresh had 12 year old wives and i'm out and i don't care i i'm sad that the kids died but i mean that motherfucker can cook yeah i mean unless it was uh propaganda v can you do a fact check on that but i'm i'm positive that that was the case and because i'm looking in the background of your of your uh home right now and i see the blue skies and make no mistake you got a few chem trails behind you yeah you're chem trailing long island yeah the chem terminal the chem

trail long island to tone this place down yeah i like the fact that he changed his name even a cult leader uh used some some some madison Avenue marketing skills because he knew his name. Vernon just wasn't, it just, you can't be a Colton leader named Vernon. It's just, it's not going to work. What a stupid ass name.

Yeah. You can't be, you can't command authority. I mean, everything is marketing. Advertising, um, is,

is so powerful. It works. And you don't even know it. It's like, yeah, I'm criminally trains you and And you don't even know it. It's like, it subliminally trains you and conditions you to think something's good. You can make anyone

believe anything. I mean, except the only thing you can't make them believe is that Vernon is somebody to follow. Yeah. I mean,

if your name is Vernon or Bertha, no matter what position you're in, anytime you talk to me, all I'm going to say to you back is I'll have a cheeseburger,

chili fries, and a Diet Coke. That's what I'll have. So shut the fuck up. I would never follow a guy named Chris DiStefano. If a guy named Chris DiStefano was like, hey, guy, listen, I'm starting a cult. My name is Chris DiStefano. I would say, get back over into that construction.

Wow, we lost Yanni. I mean, Yanni's computer or phone just died. I mean, Yanni is out of here. And cuz, we're going to keep doing the podcast. Make no mistake, the government just turned Yanni the fuck off. But we're going to keep going. It doesn't matter. I mean, Yanni got silenced.

Yanni just got silenced live on the air by the Branch Davidians or the FBI. Somebody was listening to Yanni, and they cut his mic off. So it's just what it is. Yanni's out of here. There's nothing you can do. He's going to randomly pop up at some point. Benetia, turn your camera on. I mean, Yanni is out of here.

So somebody, I guess his wife, pulled the plug on him, but we're just going to keep going because why the hell not because the history I mean is podcast and it's just wild that we lost Yanni I mean V let me ask you a question what do you think of David Koresh

first of all two questions is he a fuckboy and will he get banged out he's a hundred percent a fuckboy and he's like he's scum in my opinion I mean I can't believe uh he it was funny how he was the only one who was allowed to have sex and like everybody else really had to abstain so that was weird and uh uh yeah no i don't think he's a cutie oh there's yanni you don't

think he's cute at all i mean yanni you're. And he doesn't have the mic on. He's just franked some fucking beans and he doesn't have the mic on. There he is. Can you hear me? Yeah, cuz. You got cut off by the branched invidians. Yeah. Should I turn my... Is it better to go this way? That way, that way, that way. Yeah, there we go. Listen, I don't... Ah, cuz, you got

nice pecs and fucking nice biceps. Yeah, yeah. Am I still jacked? You biceps. Yeah, yeah. Am I still jacked? You're still jacked, cuz. I don't know what happened. My computer's plugged in and it just kicked out. I think it was the CCP, the Chinese government, or the Davidians that cut me out.

Cuz, make no mistake, with your haircut like that and your facial hair and your beefy biceps, you're a bear. I mean, you look like, cuz, you look like a, you truly look like a gay man. I mean, you look like, because you look like, you truly look like a gay man. I mean, it's just, the way the shirt is and all that, like this is, I'm telling you,

our gay followers are a little peyong right now. Yeah, let's take a peek at David Koresh. Can you just get him up and you tell me if you would follow this guy or if you would tell this guy to get back in his cubicle and keep coding. Vanitya. Fucking bonafide nerd.

Vanity said she, she, he's a fuck boy. She does not think he's cute. And he's ewey. Yeah. I don't, Vanity,

not around me. I would have to interrupt more. I mean, can you hear me? Okay, Mikey, I can hear you. See,

I, I, I gave a correction. Get softly kissed on the lips by me. I like that. I like his hair. I'm all about Koresh. I think he's cute, but I think he's brute.

Let's pull up that first one, Mikey. Let's take a good peek at his mugshot. Yeah, I mean, what do you guys think of that? You don't think he won't get softly caressed? No, I mean, the kid looks like Jeffrey Dahmer to me if Jeffrey Dahmer started listening to The Who. I mean, that hair is wild. I kind of would like to have my hair like that. Can somebody put my face in corrections and see what my face would look like with that hair?

Dr. Agos, I'm talking to you. Yeah, I mean, those glasses, those are the same glasses like the BTK killer had. Those are the same glasses that Jeffrey Dahmer had. Those are glasses that mean you're up to no good. Here's the thing. that Jeffrey Dahmer had. Those are glasses that mean you're up to no good. Here's the thing.

When the ATF, you know, surrounded the compound in Waco, Texas, there was a few firefights. I mean, these guys, they did shoot back at each other, and Koresh did release about 20 children, I think, in total. I would love to check in with them grown up now and get, hear what they have to say. Well, some of them, some of them said Koresh molested them, but then other children were like, oh, we never saw that. And he was a good guy. So you just don't know. I mean, obviously always, I would believe. Yeah. Those kids are called the ugly kids. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I would always

believe the children, you know, if they say molestedested you believe them of course and i would assume that he's a fucking dirtbag but also with the at with the um with the atf they're claiming koresh fired first but the brand of the atf fired first so i see it as why not light their house up with tear gas and burn all the burn all the witnesses and then this way they're you know you just say hey they died in a mass suicide because i my whole life i every time i thought of waco texas i thought that they david koresh did it so the narrative was he killed himself and it was a mass suicide just like jonestown but when you watch when you start to do the research you start to see like no that that probably wasn't true no that definitely wasn't true i don't think anyone ever thought that um you know everyone knew that it was that the fires yeah but i think they did try to pump that narrative right that they set the place on

fire yeah they did they tried to say the the branch the uh the government was saying that they did it in a mass suicide don't believe what they say i mean the government is a little scummy woman yeah they were a little scummy in this even though you know david koresh is to blame too it depends on who you want to blame more but you're right because i remember they were a little scummy in this, even though, you know, David Koresh is to blame, too. It depends on who you want to blame more. But you're right, because I remember they were trying to push the narrative that he always was proselytizing and preaching that they were going to all die in this sort of apocalyptic flame. Yeah, Bubba's. Yeah. And for me, when you kill kids, it's just like the government, you know, like somebody, nobody probably even lost their job for that. I mean, it's just a little brutes and goots when you killed some kids. That was a big, big, big, big, big fuck up right there. And like I said, I even think the Unabomber, I think what he did was in a response, was a response to Waco too. Am I wrong about that, Mikey? No, that's true. I heard that too. Yeah. So I think, you know, this was a major,

major, major fuck up and, and major, major point in American history that radicalized a lot of people, specifically two major homegrown terrorists that attacked – Oklahoma City bombing was Timothy McVeigh, which was a government building that he attacked. And then I think that the Unabomber also quoted Waco, right? And Waco was a part of why he did what he did. I'm not sure. I don't remember about the Unabomber, but I'm positive about Timothy McVeigh. Because I like the way that you say uni. I mean, because I say Unabomber, but the way that you pronounce the I in uni, it just makes me puke.

And I just want you to keep saying the Unabomber. Yeah. How many kids did he end up having this this this freaking cult leader what 13 14 kids how many kids mikey okay now if we were to do a list if you were to do like a buzzfeed top 10 cult leader list does david koresh make the top 10 uh i would say for me, yeah, he's in the top ten. I mean, Jim Jones, David Koresh. Jesus. Jesus. Who else?

Nice cult leader. Yanni. Yanni Papa. Who else? Who else? Andrew Schultz. I think Jim – you got to throw Jim Jones on the top 10 for sure. Well, no, I said Jim Jones.

I said I put Jim Jones as I would put him at number one. I agree. Jim Jones was a good one. You remember the Stargate folks? That was pretty funny because they all put on Nikes. Do you remember that cult? No, no. Yeah, that cult, I think Haley's Comet was coming.

They were in Los Angeles, and the guy looked wild. I mean, if we could pull up a photo of that guy. So the comet was coming, and they all felt like if they murdered themselves in these Nike sneakers in bunk beds in their little fucking compound, they would all – the comet would take them. So as the comet passed, they would stand onto the comet and they would fly away or whatever. Yeah, look at that.

Look how wild that guy was. Yeah, Heaven's Gate, 20 years later. I mean, did this guy kill himself? Yeah, they all killed themselves in Nike sneaks. Yeah, it's just what it is. They all had like those Bruce Jenner running Nikes on. It was a really horrible Nike commercial. Thank God Michael Jordan turned it all around.

Yeah, yeah. Because, by the way, we're going to do a podcast once I'm done. I finally watched the first two episodes of The Last Dance. Once we all catch up and that's done, we're going to do a potty about The Last Dance because that might be the best thing ESPN has ever made. Yeah, and I'll tell you, I can already tell you who the – I'll give a little preview on who the squeak of the week on Weapon of the Morning is going to be. Jerry Krause.

Yeah, kid's a squeak. He's a squeak, and Michael Jordan could not stop telling him how much of a squeak he was. Yeah. Koresh had 16 kids apparently. Wow. Jesus Christ, that's more than an nba basketball player that's a lot of kids baby that's the one sean kemp how about where would you put um but you got it we also got to put you got to put charles manson on the list too yeah charles manson's on the list um

who else is good cults uh charles man so we we got Charles Manson, Heaven's Gate, Jim Jones. David Koresh has got to go on there because I think David Koresh is top five. Top five, yeah. And they're all handsome. Most of these cults, they're charismatic kids because they're Heaven's Gate guys. The rest of them, they'll all get banged out most of them. Yeah. Now here's one of my favorite.

The cults are such a fascinating, such a fascinating, fascinating part of the human condition that they just keep happening. It's always one guy. It's never a woman who forms a cult, right? No.

It's always one guy and he's almost banging everyone out. How do you like the Bhagwan, cuz? You don't think the Bhagwan makes the top 10? The Bhagwan makes the top 10.

There's always involving, every single cult is always involving sex single cult is always involving sex with underage women it's you have to have that in order to be considered a cult yeah i mean the bag one was banging out everyone and he had his his vice president was sheila and she was a stone cold killer yeah stone cold killer i think she lives in sweden right now it's probably got the corona yeah and then um yeah i mean uh the bag one is a goodie um and uh i forgot the other one i was thinking about but the bag one's a goodie i mean we forgot

about the sundowning are you so are you yanni alzheimer's right now that was yanni alzheimer's because i was about to bring up another one and it totally it totally stuck real quick because i haven't seen you in person how has your alz's and your early onset been? Has it been slowing down? It's pretty good. I think nature's kicking in because it knows I'm having a baby soon. So I'm getting, you know, like before people die, they get that last jolt of energy. Yeah. So I'm getting that last jolt of energy before I go down.

So it's misleading. It makes me feel young again. But really, I'm just an old dying kid. And it's just what it is. I'm 20 pounds overweight. I don't know how I'm going to get this 20 20 off and the cult i was thinking about to be honest with you is a fun one we should do an episode about it it's the one that had that actress from the superman show who was like getting these women and and and the guy the guy's from albany new

york he's a fucking geek and a squeak and somehow he convinced all these women to join his cult and bang him out. And he was branding them right above the vagina. It's one of the... Oh, yeah, like the XVI. I know what it is. Do you know what it is, Mikey? No, I've never heard of that. Yeah, it was Wild Smallville. The girl from Smallville was like a pedophile ring

actually. Yeah, I mean, if you look that one up, what he was doing, he would actually brand the women. He would actually brand the women he would actually brand them like cows which is wild and he would bang them all out and the the actress from smallville was like one of the recruiters for him would recruit other women for him to bang out the kid but here's the thing i'll say about the kid obviously a sociopath obviously on the buzz feed top 10 all-time cult leader list. But you got to say probably one of the most successful people to come out of Albany, New York.

Who's more successful than that? Yeah. The only other thing, I think, who else ever came out of Albany? Nobody. Nobody. I mean, you know, you got the governor, outside of the governor who moves there usually, because let's be honest, you're not going to bring up anyone who becomes governor that lives in Albany, New York. I i mean at what point do we just change the capital

of new york from albany to new york city i mean at what point do we just fucking do that it's like it's a post-pandemic world why is that in albany that that's what i was getting at i'm glad you got it right there chrissy because i mean like what's the deal guy nobody's ever going to albany if you ever been to albany i mean it's it's a shit show yeah it's a shithole and to any of our fans who are from albany i mean we're not saying anything that you guys don't already believe it's a shitter yeah i just just just make new york city the capital new york city is the capital of the world how could it not be the capital of its own state that it's named after yeah it's it's stupid. It's fucking stupid.

So what happened is the FBI and the ATF and the U.S. government just eventually got fed up. Because basically David Koresa said, look, I'm going to write a report about the seven seals. God's telling me to write this thing, so give me some time to write it. And then the FBI just got, the ATF just got impatient. And the FBI and ATF got impatient. And they said, listen, you have another day. And he said, no, God is not done telling me what he needs to tell me yet. And then they just stormed the thing with tear gas and the fires erupted. But when they found David Koresh's body and a couple of the high ranking bodies, they found them with

gunshot wounds to the head. So they're claiming that when they found the bodies that they commit suicide. But I personally think when they saw his body body they put a bullet in his head to make it look like that that's very possible is there any evidence or forensic evidence that may suggest that has anyone looked into that well the thing is with the government is you just can never know i mean how are we ever going to infiltrate it you never will never know that that is, that is highly possible. I mean, there was how many days with a 57 day seat, 51, 51 days, they were living in there and they would exchange. How many times did they exchange children for food and supplies and stuff like that? Like once or twice, right? Yeah. It was like, they would give kids for, for milk. I think it was like 20, 20 children or something, 24 children. And then they wanted like, uh, they

wanted milk and stuff. And, uh, at least in the show, the branch Davidians were like, you know, you're giving us the milk, but then you're taking away the children. We need the milk for the children. So I don't fucking know. Right. So they let, he let some of them go. I mean, is you call that a hostage situation? What is that? Like, that's the thing. It's like they were all there willingly, but were they really because they're brainwashed. So it'sashed? Is it a hostage situation? I see it as a hostage situation. I see it as a hostage negotiation, even though everyone there is there willingly because they're there because they have Stockholm Syndrome. fascinating thing that was named after um an incident in stockholm where some guys robbed the bank and then the people who they uh held hostage actually started having feelings and and started siding with the kidnappers you ever seen the stockholm syndrome movie i watched it on a plane

once it was fucking awesome no no it's great movie um so it's 50 days seven day siege it was basically a hostage negotiation they let a a total of like 20 kids go. At the end of the fucking day, I think you got to say, in retrospect, the FBI and ATF fucked up. Janet Reno, given the green light, fucked up. They fucked up big time, I think. And for me, it's like you know they started playing they started playing really loud music throughout the day to like fuck with their senses try to they started to do things that like it was a little like nazi-ish what like the american government

started to do it's a little bit like hey you know our tax dollars were supposed to be the best law enforcement agency in the world don't you have any other tactic than blasting loud music to try to get them out i mean what are you doing here don't you have anything better than tear gas it's not going to set on fire like yeah and i don't know if you do that that way over weapons charges i mean it was like i mean why why did they go to that extent it seemed like anything else to me the guy who was in charge or his name's escaping me was an egotistical fucking maniac himself and didn't want to look like an asshole and so it's the same thing it's like one man's ego causes all these people to die it's the same thing in war it's like hundreds of thousands of people and

millions of people have to die usually because one man's an egomaniac little squeak with a little piece yeah i mean and one man's ego usually it comes from a squeak with a little piece. Yeah, I mean, and one man's ego, usually it comes from a squeak who has insecurity, and one man's ego, because of one man's ego, the great Bulls dynasty of the 90s had to get broken up, because a kid just couldn't stop wanting credit

for building that team. You're the squeak of the week, you're the squeak of the month, you're the squeak of the year, your name is Jerry Krause, you're a weird-looking kid that looks like a frog. You're a weird-looking kid that looks like a frog. You guys are weird-looking kid. I mean, and Michael Jordan used to shit on him bad. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. And it's true.

It always comes down to some little squeaks, ego, some insecure kid. They fucked this up. What was the guy's name, Mikey or Venetia, who was sort of the top-level government representative or hostage negotiator at Waco? Yeah, while we're finding that, because also, at least in the TV show, they made it seem like the AT, because when Janet Reno was like, hey, I'm not, by the way, Will Ferrell plays the best Janet Reno of all time. I mean, that's just the best Janet Reno of all time is Will Ferrell. But, um, when, when, uh, in this TV show, Janet Reno said, you got to give me a reason why we got to use tear gas. Like,

let's just wait. They claim that they, the ATF claim that they still were seeing sexual abuse amongst children. And that maybe wasn't true. So there's some speculation that the leaders of the ATF and the FBI might have lied to Attorney General Janet Reno and say there was child abuse just to get her to say A-OK to the tear gas, and when that may not have been true. So if that's true, I mean, it's just like, it's a little, either way, it's like disgusting on both sides. It's like, you're lying to get what you want, and then you're going to kill everybody. I don't understand how nobody from the ATF or FBI was fired if they lit that house on fire and that was their plan. I mean, couldn't, something had to happen to them.

Yeah. Bob Ricks, I believe, who's the one who was in charge of it. That's his name, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he's a little squeak. I bet he's got a shape-up beard like I got. Can we Google a picture of him? Can we get a picture of him? I want to see if he's a

fat fucking squeak. Let's get a picture of him, and then I want to ask Chrissy, what would you have done to get him out? Let's say you're in that position. You're Bob. What do you do to get him out? Because I'll tell you, what I would do is I'd play nice and say, hey guys, listen. There's a Kenny Chestnut concert going on out here,

and there's fucking free barbecue for everybody. And we got some sombreros and some real Texas shit, and Mike Emoji Face is going to be opening up with 10 minutes about his ex-wife. So let's come out and join this festival. Let's celebrate Mexican culture, and let's celebrate some barbecue, and come on out guys and and i would have said yeehaw and that's it that's how you get fucking rednecks out of a building let's say get rednecks out of a building yeah or yeah i would have said i yeah i would have just

said that listen hey you guys there's there's democrats getting into the back window so run out the front door and they would have ran out or we call them is giving's giving Mike a Cinco de Mayo feast, you know, rice, beans, pollo, arroz con pollo, you know, whatever, you know, chupacabra, whatever they want to eat, and then stick a pipe in his butt and then put that into one of the windows and just have him fart into the house. Just have him start ripping farts into the house for an hour and then get everyone out. That's better than my method, I think. That's a lot better than my method.

Yeah, somebody make that an animation. What you do is you just fucking hire a Hollywood movie studio. You dress some guy up like Jesus. Use some Hollywood effects and tell the people the real Jesus is here. He's commanding you out. Have him played by Ildris Elba,

of course, because Jesus was black. Then do a little fucking Hollywood fucking special effects. Call the Jews to change the weather. make it rain, because they can do that, and like, just trick the guy out, use your brain to get him out, you don't have to use force. There you go, that's an even better idea, I think we solved it. I think we came up with some pretty good ideas for the future, listen, if there's, if the ATF is listening to this, we just gave you guys some great, great, great ideas for how to handle the next cult leader

when he's got a bunch of children that he's banging out holed up in a building in Texas. Yeah, I just don't like this guy, this leader. I just, he's got that face where he just, he looks like, you know, I just don't like him at all. He looks like he's taking his picture with his dick and balls tucked back between his legs and he's sitting on it and it gives him pleasure.

And I don't like him at all. Do you like this guy's face? No. This guy, to me, you know what he looks like? He looks like one of those guys that kind of, like, is very stern in his public life. And when he goes to the office, to the people who he works with, his coworkers, but secretly at night on Saturday nights, he goes to, like, a dungeon where he puts on leather, and he does weird stuff with leather,

like leather latex stuff, domination stuff. That's what he looks like to me. Yeah, that's what he looks like to me too. Yeah, I don't like him at all, but whatever. Yeah, there's Kraus. I mean, that's intense.

Yeah, there's Jerry Kraus. I mean, there it is. And look at me. Look who's back, baby. Listen, here's the thing about Yanni. Here's the thing about Yanni Olmos. Yeah. Yeah, Yanni. Here's the thing about Yanni almost. Yeah. Yeah, Yanni.

He dropped one. Okay, there he is. Am I back? You're back on. You're on two. It's wild now. You're twinsies. Yeah, I'm on two Zooms right now.

And right now my computer's wild now because I don't have a mouse. Cuz, we're getting you from all angles. This is wild. Cuz, your T-shirt is too small yeah i'm trying to get the zoom to work and i just can't i don't even have a mouse cuz just right now you're showing mike you're just showing mike your barbecue and glued a little bit showing yeah i mean can you put Jerry Krause back up there? Let's look at this kid, and how

is he made? He looks like a human frog. Yeah, because you've got a great haircut, and I'm not seeing any signs of male powder baldness. Yeah, look who's back, baby. Yeah, gotta turn one of them off. Yeah. And his mic's off now, because you're the

king of Franks and Beans today. There you go. Y stop me, but I'll always come back Looking like a Texas manager Of a circuit city And I can't be stopped You can't be stopped, cuz, because make no mistake You're a biter, you will bite your way out of the fight I'm a biter

Is Jerry Krause still alive? How funny is it that Marv Albert bit a prostitute all about her body with a toupee on and just continued to have a career after that? And just kept going, swish! Yes! And it counts. Louis C.K., all he did was take

out his penis after asking a few girls, and his career's over. Marv Albert bit a prostitute all over her body with a toupee on, which is two strikes, and he still has a great career. How did that happen? I don't know, cuz. Kraus died in 2017.

Oh, okay. So they probably waited for him to die to do that documentary. Yeah. He ate a poison fly. Yeah. He what? Sorry. Oh, okay.

He ate a poison fly. Oh, he ate a poison fly. Yeah, frog yeah frog jump now let me ask you mikey you're 70 years old like me and you're made my wife spit up fucking she spit up why was that so funny to you yeah i can you know it's funny i get you know i you know i've gotten like 10 messages from friends friend uh from fans who go like, how come Chrissy never laughs at your joke? I just want to tell you, he doesn't laugh at my jokes because I'm not funny. No, you are funny.

I just, because you know how I mean. I'm dead inside. I'm dead inside. Are you all right? You almost choked. Yeah, I almost choked. So Chrissy, I said, Mikey, you're 70 like me and you're from Texas, cuz. So what was the perspective from Texas?

What were you thinking? This was happening in your own backyard. I mean, I know you probably weren't thinking that much because you all got the itis from eating barbecue and you're fat and you're sitting on your couch. Your brain cells don't work. But the few minutes you had before your meal, what were you thinking about with David Koresh? I mean, I was a freshman in high school, so it was just weird because all they talked about on the news, because we didn't have the internet,

so that's all they talked about. We just heard his entire biography, and how he was a pedophile, and all the news said was that story, that they caused it themselves, and they're basically committing suicide, and the ATF were were to save them and then you find out six months later that was all a lie now was he are there was he just like is there a

lot of guys in texas like that is that like is he like is that like a texas is that a is that an anomaly or are there a lot of like weird sex of christianity i don't know i don't know much about texas except for the fact that it's its own country, really. Yeah. I mean, there's weird Christians, but they're more like, give me your money Christians, not give me your family Christians. Right. Right, right, right. That seems like a Montana, Michigan thing. Right.

Right, right, right, right, right, right. Right. This actually does seem more of like a Michigan kind of, that's, Colts, Colts and AR-15s and stuff, that's a real Michigan problem. Yeah. Yeah. That's money and raising your kids Michigan problem. Yeah. Yeah, money and raising your kids. Yeah.

Yeah, so David Koresh, he taught that he was the Messiah and that any children born of the Messiah would be sacred. So that's how he got around. Because, I mean, guys, don't make the mistake. If you were Branch Davidian living in that compound with him, I mean, he wasn't legally allowed to bang out your wife. Like, even if you came in married, like, you have to give up rights to your wife and he would bang them out because he took on the burden of sexuality from God,

and he was the Messiah. So he bet any children you wanted, these guys, they wanted to get cucked out by him because they believed he was the Messiah. Yeah, I bet you he had a little peace, too. 100%. Yeah, I mean, only a guy with a little peace would think of that to compensate and be like, look, imagine some guy telling you he's your cult leader and you're a girl there to bang him out.

And then he pulls down his pants. He's got a little piece. Are you, I'm going to question and be like, are you really a representative of God? Because, you know, some of these leaders, one of the leaders was for one of the followers was from Harvard. I mean, because for me, anytime I see if anybody joins a cult, I mean, I just think they're franks of being stupid fucking people. But this guy went to Harvard, so he couldn't have been stupid.

Yeah, I mean, it's an interesting thing. I think, I don't think it's as much stupid as it's gullible. I think it's like there's this gullible thing. We all have like this, everything is from childhood, I believe. I believe I'm Freudian in that way. And I think people who are susceptible to cults, they have some sort of thing missing. They have a missing love from a parent or something. And then someone can come in and fill that void for them.

And that's how they latch on like a virus, like a virus latches on to proteins. I think cult leaders, cult leaders and manipulators can lack onto that void that was left by a missing parent. It's the same thing to me. I don't know if Mike, V, or Yanni, if you guys have been in a sorority or fraternity, but to me, it always seems stupid. It's like, why would I pledge to have friends?

It always seemed like, but maybe I'm wrong on it. It always seemed gullible and how insecure are you? It's like, don't you just have friends already? Or why are you going to fucking drink bleach to hang out with these people i never understood it but am i wrong on the fraternity sorority like how is that explained how is that different than a cult well i think all of them have the similar tenant they all have the same anatomy in that uh they play on our need to be in a tribe we're you know there's only some sort of you know it's like what's the difference between a cult

and being Greek-American in the diaspora of Venetia, right? It's like, Greeks all share something in common. They act the same way. They have the same beliefs. They're fearful of outsiders. They push outsiders away. The only difference is you can't... Greeks don't really proselytize,

but is there a difference between a Jewish sect of Hasidim and David Koresh? I mean, they're all around some beliefs that can't be proven, and there's always some charismatic leader at the top. Yo, charisma goes a long way, cuz. Charisma is, I'm telling you, I think, especially in entertainment or even in comedy, the number one thing is charisma and likability over being funny. You could be the funniest guy in the world and not get shit, but if you're charismatic and likable, baby,

you're going to have a career. I mean, because how many times are we like, so-and-so is so famous, but we're looking at their jokes, like their jokes suck, but it's like, because it ain't about the jokes. It's about the charisma and their likability. Yeah, I mean, you can really,

I mean, you can do anything. People love being bullshitted. I think there's something about like, hey, baby, we want to be entertained. It's like, you know, it's like you see every, like the people who are on the street in New York City doing that ball trick. It's like we all know it's bullshit. We all know there's a plant in there. But it's like we like being wowed. It's like magicians.

We know it's a trick, but we still want to be like, wow, how did you do that? Because we're being entertained. So maybe cult leaders just kind of, they're entertainers because maybe they wake up and they're like, I got two sets tonight. You know, it's like every time I used to go to church and I was an altar boy, I used to think about that, especially after I became a comedian. I would go like, this guy's doing a show right now. He's waking up going like, I got a 10 a.m. and a 12 p.m.

I got two shows outfit changes you know there's an audience yeah you know they they fucking sing along i mean it's it's a show baby the world's a stage history hyenas is reality is a suggestion yeah by bus and cuz i just want to also mention in that siege you know four atf agents were killed so we got uh you know acknowledge them four atf agents were killed and if you could kill an ATF agent, they probably had some high power rifles in there or the bullets were from Jesus. I don't know, but they killed four ATF agents. So that, you know, so once you kill four ATF agents, then that's when the, that's why 900 troops showed up. Eventually it was 900. I think it was the biggest siege in American history still to this day. You had 900 federal agents surrounding the compound because they killed four ATF agents.

Yeah. I mean, so let's not give the impression that this was an innocent cult that was besieged by these evil ATF agents. Like most things, there's a gray zone here. They did fire back. They did kill some ATF agents. You know, they did, they refused to come out. They weren't following instructions from the law. You know, it's a gray zone. And that's why we started this episode saying like, who do you really side with? Because it's not clear cut. You know, there was wrong and good on both sides. Yeah. And if any of our branch Davidian, uh,

Patreon members who went to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge boys, and I've joined the matriarchy, please write on the community board and tell us what it's like to be a branch Davidian. Yeah. I mean, what's it like to be a day, the follower of David?

Is that what it is? It's after David, right? No, it's we, cause a lot of people think David Koresh branch Davidians, but actually it has nothing to do with that. The branch Davidians, um, the branch Davidians were, who was the founder?

Oh, yeah, Ben Roden in 1959 as an offshoot of the Davidian Seventh-Day Adventist Church by Victor Hutleff. So just coincidental that David Koresh and the Davidians, it has nothing to do. The Branch Davidians are still around today. They were around before Koresh, and they're around after him. Yeah, there's just so many different sects of Protestantism. There's so many different. There's a few sects of Islam.

The Hasidic Jews got different sects. It's like, which one is right? When Jesus comes back, who's he going to be? Is he going to be Catholic? I mean, it's almost like a fun game. You can make it into a game show when jesus comes back everyone's gonna gather around be like okay which one of us was right and which one of us was just wasting our entire lives because yeah when when the jesus has come back yeah i know that the head of the muslim christian and jewish church we should all be like blind date who's behind door number one two or three who's your jesus

We should all be like blind date. Who's behind door number one, two, or three? Who's your Jesus? Exactly. Kazi. All right, Pepe. So that was Waco, Texas. I mean, you know, people died.

David Koresh with the Wikipedia sluts. You can Google it. We watched Waco on Netflix. It was fucking cute. I thought the acting was great. And Macaulay Culkin's little brother plays Thibodeau, who winds up writing the book on Waco, Texas. But make no mistake, it's Macaulay Culkin's little brother. Make no mistake, the Macaulay Culkin brothers, as they're known by me,

are all a bunch of squeaks. Squeaks, squeaks, squeaks, squeaks, squeaks. Yeah, Macaulay Culkin, just a wild little fucking kid. I want to read some of the Patreon names, Mikey. Can you send the Patreon names? Because make no mistake, I have to do a podcast after this. I have to do Nikki Glaser's show, and I don't want to do it. I'm thinking of ways to get out of it, but

I have to sign on in 20 minutes, and I just don't want to do it. Yeah, I mean, you're the king of doing podcasts that you don't want to do. Bubba, where did you send it, Mikey Wykie? Your email. Okay. Sorry, hon. Wow, you got a long day today. This is your third podcast in a row coming up.

Yeah, it's just, you know, I'm an idiot, but what can you do? What are we going to read to? Do we have a natural? We just got to get through them, right? Yeah, I wrote it in the email, the very first sentence. Oh, okay. I got it, got it, got it. Got it.

Okay, so as always, at the end of every episode, we read the names out. The people went to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. We encourage you guys to write a funny name. I read them. Yanni reacts to them. The best name, we give the PPW, the pseudo-penis of the week. And we shout you out. And it's been great.

We've had so many new members. So many new members, in fact, that we can't get to everybody in one episode. So if you don't hear your name this episode, don't worry. Your your name's coming we're just got a little bit of a backlog of us before we start i just want to let everybody know who's a toot we are going live monday through friday at 9 a.m eastern time wet by in the morning is our patreon.com slash bay ridge boys show it's on our network patreon.com slash bay ridge boys tune in It's on our network, patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Tune in live every morning, 9 a.m., WEP in the morning.

Every Saturday, 7.30 p.m. live, our new show, No Nets. First episode is with Dan Soder. That's up on Patreon to watch. Our guest this Saturday is going to be none other than Andrew Santino to Red Rocket, baby. Send us your questions. Tune in.

The show's a hit where we put comedians on the spot, ask them wild questions. The questions come from the fans, and we tally up the score at the end to see how many questions they passed on, how many they answered, and how wild they're willing to get. No nets every Saturday, 7.30 p.m. Eastern, baby. Yeah, Bubba. Okay, here we go. Let's start off these Patreon names. p.m. Eastern, baby. Yeah, Bubba. Okay, here we go.

Let's start off these Patreon names. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Will Hoffman, Corey Street, Jim Bees the Man, Ella, Tony Sanitize the Rice-a-Roni Smith. Nice. Drexler. Colleen. Peter Derek Jeter hit a home run on my Ferone Buns Robinson.

Nice. Went for it. Julius. MA. Then we got Jesse. When you wake up the boys, you get cleaned out and made into a TV dinner. Rafali. That's the first good one.

Put him on a freaking list. Asterisk. On the list. Donovan Hayes. Then we got Joey. I fight fires with my fists And get my dick twist Ladder 14

Kostecki You know where he's going He's not going over the wall He's going on the list He's on the list Victim of the crack Pull my skin back Cause I'm not

A Jew Unfortunately Okay On the list? Yeah you gotta put him on the list For the funny For the funny points. Then we got Liz, it's what it is, pewing.

Tony the Pony with a bowl of macaroni. Nice. Buddy Drexler. And by the way, when we say Drexler, a lot of people have been asking, when Giannis says Drexler, he's referring to Clyde Drexler, who unfortunately was an unbelievable basketball player, but played in Michael Jordan's shadow. The best player of all time.

That's just what happened with Clyde Drexler. Yeah, it means your answer was good. You were just unfortunately on the same list with someone who was better. Yeah. Just literally if Clyde Drexler plays in any other decade other than Jordan's decade, he might be talked about as the second or third best player of all time. Correct. Okay.

So then we got Elenia Reid. Elenia Reid. We got the Eddie P. Okay. So then we got, uh, Elenia Reed, Elenia Reed. Uh, we got the Eddie P show. Then we got Eiffel towered by Yanni long days and Chrissy chaos. Nice. Then we got Liz can make a mean panine during this quarantine. Torres Wepa.

I like it. Throw her on a list. I make no mistake. She had, there was a possibility she was going over the wall. Yeah, but she didn't mean I like it Gregory Galindo then we got Jesus White Walker

Sarah Gutierrez then we got Sherry aka size triple E want to swing on Chrissy's tree but the situation will kill me Watson that gets a working girl she's on the all time list That gets a working girl. She's on the all-time list.

Yeah. Then we got Chupacabra. We got Jake, make no mistake. I tuck back my snake, Roberts. Yeah, I mean, that's on the list. It's between him and Liz. Yeah. I mean, Jake, make no mistake, I took back my snake.

Roberts is 10. I made a 10. Okay. Then we got Sarah from Long Island, but my grandma lives in Bay Ridge, ladder 14. Nice. JC Brock,

Brian, Damir Milos, Derek Bird, Tim Dillon moves my monkey, Cracked Open, Cuzzy here to drop a hundo for Chrissy Quarantine's open asshole. Okay. Funny, but Drexler.

Edison. Max Brand. Kay. Sean. Then we got one of Phil Chrissy up and glue him shut, but I got a situation named Colleen. A lot of 14. That's a good one.

Good one. I like it. Oh, God. It would be on the list if it wasn't for those two home runs. All right. Then we got Quarren Kelsey, Michael, Adam Teeny Peeny Linguine. Put Tiny Peeny Linguine on the list. Okay.

Then we got Say Yas to the Drafts. Thank you. Then we got Ty O'Leary who came from Flagrant 2, but make no mistake, you guys are funnier, Smith. If it makes Yanni Corona laugh, it goes on the list. It goes on the list. Then we got Marielle. Then we got Yanni Baggy Magnums.

Then we got Julia Leach. Haley Palemque. Palemque? Palemque, Hallie Palemque, John Stanley, Ian Westfall, Matthew Winters, Cutie Patootie, Ed Kaelin, My Smoothie, Chrissy Fears the Queer So He Makes the Cum Disappear in His Anus. Nice. Good one. Nice try. Nice swing. Then we got formerly John, I Now Go kate chris's ass i'm gonna impregnate yeah throw him right catapult him right onto the list throw them right on the list

uh kelly majors dean then we got chrissy sit on my face but six feet away like a crippled toot big fumes d i mean big fumes d on the. Yeah. Then we got, if you say Clyde Drexler right now, cuz, I will stab Chrissy D in the hip until Lakeside Maple runs down his left half. Cuz, I mean, he went for it. It just, that was a good swing, but a little too long. A little too long. Yanni Longdays, but thank you. Then we got Bailey Ridge, Anthony Colonna,

Yanni P and Chrissy D unloaded in my B, and now I have HIV. That got a laugh out of Mrs. Pompous. Throw them on the list. Then we got Billy Bath bumping with Yanni's hairy fume box. Good try. Jay Matos. Then we got

Hey Bert, Your Mom is a Toot. That's what you call a throwback. That's a throwback. Then we got Chrissy Gets Erections and Wears No Protection. That's more of a fact of the world. Yeah. Then we got Sauce Monkey Supreme. Then we got Devin Zeppeli's Don't Taste the Same Since the Towers Fell,

Ladder 14. Oh, my God. The originality of that is off the charts. Throw him on the list. Then we got Colin, VJ Pie. Then we got Straight to the Back. Then we got Cuz. Make no mistake, I'm stuck quarantined in Puerto Rico,

but I'm still supporting Christy Coquito and Yanni Pollo Frito. That's it. I mean, that's it. Throw him on the list right now. He needs to go on the list, and by the list, I mean Pollo Frito. That's it. I mean, that's it. Throw him on the list right now. He needs to go on the list. And by the list, I mean, that's it. That's it. We got Kieran.

Then we got Rudy Tutti, Rudy Giuliani. Got my fart box ripped like Kumail Nan and Johnny. Because I just have to ask you a question. Because I know you're rushing off like you're always Chrissy Rushies. Because you got to do a podcast that you shouldn't be doing. Yeah. But anyway, I just have to ask you a question because I know you're rushing off. Like you're always Chrissy rushes. Cause you got to do a podcast that you shouldn't be doing. Yeah. But anyway, I don't care.

And I got to ask you a question. Yeah. Cause are, are fan, are they coming in this funny or are we making them this funny? Because these kids are so fucking funny. I can't handle it. I think that a lot of the times we give like a little bit,

like where the coaches, like we give a a little bit like where the coach is. Like we give a little bit of here's the design. Here's what you do. But they're the players and they're the ones doing the work. So we're Phil Jackson. They're Michael Jordan. That's what I think. I think that was perfectly described.

Mikey, you know what to do? Throw that motherfucker on the list. Yes. Then we got stick your hyena beef in my queef box. Then we got Stick Your Hyena Beef in My Queef Box. Then we got Jordan, If I Thought My Alter Boy Days

of Confessional Booth Lap Kisses and Nubule Abuse Was Over. I got another thing coming, Chamberlain. On the list.

On the fucking list. Then we got Kyle Straight to the Back But I'm Down to Get Cracked Open and Empty Chrissy's Sack. Nice. Nice.

Drexler. Then we got shot bloody glue. Didn't freak out because of you. Nice. Then we got Salman Alatavoli, Christian Fox. Then we got Johnny will finger my cow purse gland on command for Chrissy Deutschland Silvestri.

I mean, because they keep coming in hot. Yeah, that one almost made me pass out. I got a low blood pressure. I almost like I got lightheaded from laughing from that. Throw it on the list. On the list. Then we got Marietta Colburn. Then we got FF, Davey the Right Wing.

They buy immune to COVID because the only cure is Guzzlin, Chrissy D's, Baby Gravy. Okay. He went for it. You get points for effort. Matthew Olmstead, Lisa. Then we got Sir, keep that butt high and tight and move the veggies to the right because Chrissy's got a chunky for that hunky.

Good try. I like it. Drexler. Eric straight to the back, McDade. Then we got Tim Dillon glues down Tony Hinchcliffe. Then we got Wendy, Wuhan, home quarantine warrior, deep cuts, Maglikuddy III. Oh, McGillicuddy.

Sorry. Drex, Drex. Ryan Voss, Spencer Jordan. Then we got Johnny Salami, the man in the army who wants Yanni's Fumari Punani. Throw him on the list. Jesus Christ. Then we got Matt Walcott

Cause he was he was a bear who needs the oddy like yoddy Then we got Casey But when I tuck it Stacy Throw that originality on the list Then we got Father Bill's cum dump Then we got Dax Leonardo Dravinci Brian Bowden Then we got Dax Leonardo Dravinci. Brian Bowden.

Then we got Big Bangkok Brendy. Pat. Then we got Manny, not a muzzy, so you can call me your cuzzy, Valdez. Then we got Johnny. Yeah, the Jap sucker punched Pearl Harbor, but make no mistake, the boys invented the microwave Giovanni.

Yeah, I mean, that's an inventive one. I'm going to Drexler him. And all the other ones, I just want to say thank you for your service. Straight to the back, we welcome you. We welcome you. Then we got Ellie Driscoll. Then we got Jenna, the enemies live in my Jufro Ross.

Then we got Papa Pappas' premium puppy pap smears of Poughkeepsie. You wreck them, we check them. Wow. On the list. On the wreck them, we check them. Wow. On the list. On the list. Then we got Dave, make no mistake, I'll stick my jewel in Giannis' jewel. Holds well. Then we got straight to the back, Evie C., Chad Smith, Amanda, Doug,

can't stop pulling my puds since quarantine green. Jeff Weissbach. Then we got Ruda, toot, toot, two men in a cute fry boot. Here's the deal. I just thought of a new way we're going to do this. Mikey, you take note of everyone who goes on the list, and then after this is done, I'm going to throw it on Patreon, all the names, and in the comments, you guys vote for the ones that you want.

Whoever gets the most votes wins. Yeah, done. Every week. Okay, then we got Frankie57squeak, but I'm not weak. I'll bend Chrissy over and bust them cheeks. McGillicuddy. I mean, we got a lot of McGillicuddies. Yeah, throw McGillicuddy on the goddamn list.

Then we got Becky P here to stimulate Chrissy D's economy. Very funny. Drexler. Then we got Moby C. Willie Schweins pfeiffer um then we got i let asians blow in my ass without a mask but only after eating lakeside maple out of my asshole lakeside maple still getting free promotion throw them on a list then we got matt healy the lead singer from the 1975 chrissy please kiss me on the lips oh yes absolutely coming to you yeah Kiss me on the lips.

Oh, yes, absolutely coming to you. Yeah. Cameron Mason, Corey, Maram S., Matthew Cook. Then we got Poughkeepsie Pauly, I do Yanni's dirty work real cheap. Ayana straight to the back like Chrissy's piece after he tucks it. That's actually really funny, and that's original. Throw her on the list for that. On the list. Then we got Jonathan Story.

Then we got Ejaculate on me. Call me Rocky for this comeback. Courtney Gogan. Uh, cuz he was, he wasn't very cuz he was she. Okay. Then we got Alex shouts to Chrissy D and Yanni P.

Ian, Kieran Brobst, Brett. Then we got need to hear a stimulating potty from the boys to crack open my wife, babe. That's originality points. Cause he's saying he's got the sexuality like you and he needs to talk to the boys, crack up his wife, babe. That's originality points because he's saying he's got the sexuality like you

and he needs to talk to the boys, crack up his wife, throw him on the list. What it is. Then we got Commodore Tom Tom, Haley Jackson, Emily Voorhees. Then we got Chrissy Corona, let me bone you, it ain't gay if you don't swallow Trump 2020.

Drexler. Then we got the champ, Richie, the crew of 82 put their glue in my mom too. Venetia, what's up with you? Throw that motherfucker on the list. Yeah. Then we got Brandon. Then we got Mikey V, lick my pee, swallow my seed,

and pass me to Chrissy D. Mikey, you know where he goes. Elizabeth Phillips. Elizabeth Phipps. I'm sorry. Jessica DeLong-King. Then we got AtPussyLips48. Then we got Tyler Andrew Carriage.

Then we got Seth, leading man of faith, best friend, Body Klein. Then we got Julia. We got Marco DeNarco, white walking but kind of darko. Then we got QuarantineCoyotes, Eat Chrissy's d's 85 clean booty and hashtag trump 2020 um nick then we got ass crack heart attack fauci give my rim jobs back then we got fermenting kamichi in my taint uh did i pass the the the end not yet okay which is the one that we're ending on again? It's at 2.50 and we're at 1.50. Oh, wow. Okay.

Wow. Matt Goodall, Greg Brooks, here for the content, it's what it is. Chrissy D and the D stands for the dysfunction of the Calper's gland. Then we got Sean Opa, Holiday Inn, I'll take you physically.

Weishan Chia Nelson. Good one. Good one. Tyler Swiger, Brenda, Angelo, The Garlic Better Be Sliced Thin, Colmo, Jashiel Brown, Richard Scott, John Carlino. Then we got the Violent Highest Shit Irish Pirate Who Clothes Eyes Lids With Pipe Hits And Only Chills With Five Men. Okay. Wow.

Nathan voted most fumes class of 2013, baby. Duncan. Then we got Humberto Garza, JP. Then we got Living My Truth as a non-tute. Then we got Father Matt made me play with his cricket bat. Good one, Drex. Then we got Ryan Yanni, Papa Peace will get cracked open while Chrissy Cuck flicks his post-op bean on the neutral staircase. Simpson. He brought back the neutrals, and for that, I'm going to give him a Drexler, but good one. Okay.

Then we got Yanni, Panini has an itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny-peeny. Drex. Ryan, Monteith, Cam Risen. Then we got Mike. My cousin's a muzzy, so his peace is fuzzy. But make no mistake, he's still responsible for 9-11 Smith. Yeah. My cousin's a muzzy, so his piece is fuzzy.

But make no mistake, he's still responsible for 9-11 Smith. Yeah, I mean, he goes on the list. Yeah. Then we got Ask Gay. Then we got Chrissy, come to Ireland and sit on my lap. No homo, 20% gay, 80% love, babe. Alex Reich, Peter P. Pyoing, Laura Toe, Alexander Giblin. Then we got Zach Arbucci, the Ridgewood Kid, too.

Bangin' Sauce Monkey, cuz he will crack you open, even if you're in ISIS, as long as you're a piece. Okay? Thank you. Mike Catter, Parker Hayes, Cam Schultz, Valentin Caseros, Tommy Noon, Arnold Schlutzenegger. Word, dope. Now shut the fuck up and get back on the knee padded side of the glory hole.

I like it. Drexler. Drexler. Andrew Baker, Chris, Maria Giselle, Connor O'Leary, Cuzzy Wuzzy, crack me open and go deep with your Mariana Trenchfoot Jones. Oh, yeah, with your Mariana Trenchfoot Jones. Okay. Very good, Drex.

Gregory Lombardo, Bianca DiMaio, Diego Lamboglia, Aria Blake, Cutie with a Smoothie Caroline, Andresa Nikolic, Ramon, Jeff Bridges, Mikey Lowlife, Nathan True Blue with Jew Glue, shooting Pelosi flu in Chrissy's butt stew, some fumes. Yeah, throw them on the list. He's on the list. Yep. Yep.

Called it Pelosi flu. So good. Real original. Then we got Aaron James. Then we got Greg Barlow, a.k.a. not a huge fan of the Chinese word because I'm starting to wheeze

at the top it off. Lost my damn car keys. Yeah, he goes on the list. I mean, whoever say we don't read the names, go fuck yourself. This is probably the most hilarious part of the podcast. Because we're inventing

mentally ill people that shouldn't be mentally ill. Yeah, I mean, these guys are so funny. Victor Brass Penning. Then we got Alex. I keep glitter in my back pocket so I can create arts and crafts when I use my hot glue gun on Chrissy's back. Gerard. Yes!

Yeah! Reality points and funny on the list. Leahard. Yes! Yeah! And funny on the list. Liam McCarthy. Then we got Tommy. I'm not riding the subway until Giuliani's back in office. It's on the list for the originality. Then we got Vinny almost got with Then we got Vinny almost got with anti-hissy Chrissy last night

with his drippy tippy Garcia. Nice. Drexler. Then we got Jake wearing a Ross dress for less dress Ross out. Okay. Then we got Connor, a Swiss who looks like a Jew loves 1975 too. Drexler. Then we got five feet tall with shoes on but still feisty

so I will resort to biting ankles to get my way if I have to. It's what it is. Drexler but funny. Then we got Dinky Boy. Then we got Rodney. I'm no FF vegan, but I'll toss Yanni's Greek salad any day, Santoraci. I mean, just call yourself

Santoraci and you might go on the list, but it's a Drexler. Yeah. Then we got Thomas, Phil Chrissy's toot shoot full of lakeside maple and let me clean that whistle like the hungry, hungry hippo that I am, camp. What are we doing to people? I know. Then we got Chrissy, no, eat the poo-poo,

because Dr. Fauci said there would be corona in that doo-doo. Hashtag Freeble Cosby. Let's stop there. That's it? Yeah, let's stop there. Okay, that's where we'll stop. That one was funny, but it's getting a Drexler. Mikey, did you record all the ones that went on? Yes. All right, what we'll stop that one was funny but it's getting a drexler mikey did you record all the ones that went on yes all right what we'll do from now on is we'll post them on the patreon

and uh and you guys will vote in the comments on who you think should win and then we will announce the winner on the next episode it's a it's something we're going to do from now on that i just figured out and that's the way to go because we got a good problem to have there's a lot of them we're never going to stop reading them. You guys are the funniest. And make no mistake, in 2020, this is such a gift for you and us to be doing entertainment this way. Because of you guys, we're able to do this. You're our producers.

It's such a freeing and refreshing way to bring you content. Thank you for your support. All the people who went straight to the back, we see you too. You're here for the content. Me and Chrissy, we love you guys. And we'll see you next week, babe.

We'll see you next week. And Bubba's also, I just want to let everyone know, Wednesday, May 6th, we got a sale coming out for our merch. We're going to post out the code on Teespring from May 7th to May 10th. We're going to have a big sale using the promo code that we're going to put out tomorrow, that we're going to put out on Wednesday, May 6th. You use that code, you get a nice discount for our merch. And we got some new merch coming out there. And also, of course, WebFi in the Morning every morning

and no nets this Saturday with the great Andrew Santino, the Red Rocket. Thank you for being a fan. Thank you for listening. Love you, Bubba's. Thank you. Outro Music