History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 175 - The Electoral College is WILD!

Episode Date: November 4, 2020

It’s an F&B History Hyenas Halloween! The guys are late with celebrating but, hey they’re wild, just like the things they say in today's episode! Recorded a day before Election Day, Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas discuss the Electoral College and how we are the only country that votes this way. Chris is dressed up like Colonial Chrissy and Yannis is a Hyena fan, our guy Richie G! What’s going to happen, are we going to get sold to China like Chris says or get 4 more years of Donny T?! It is Biden vs. Trump and baby it's hard to say right now who is going to win!It’s hard to say because people are just horrible! They need celebrities to get naked in order to vote?! I mean come on people what are we doing?! But really, what are we doing? Should we still have the electoral college? It’s a system created in the 1700s and people have been trying to get rid of it as it is based on slavery. How do we fix this? Be like Elsa and just let it go? Should we have a popular vote? Politics are hard to understand, but the boys try their hardest to break it down! But let's be real DON'T EXPECT TOO MUCH HISTORY CUZ THEY GO FULL HYENA! Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website 🎥 Mike Lavin our producer on InstagramSubscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

what's up everybody welcome to another episode of history hyenas i'm uh chrissy de stefano colonial chrissy with me is yannis papas aka richie g it's wednesday welcome to four more glorious years of donny t it is yanni p and with time And with time travel, Chrissy could not wait to crawl into his Revolutionary War era outfit. He's been prancing around with his big fat ass. You sent me a picture. You gave, cuz, you fucking, you sent me a sext. I sent you a sext. Let's put it on Patreon.

Yeah, we're going to put it on Patreon. You can see through my underwear, cuz. Unfortunately, we're doing this Monday. And I said it looked like Jessica Kirsten was bending over. Yeah, Jessica Kirsten. I banged her. Yeah! Yeah!

We are the Wild Hyena. We're Jessica Kirsten. I love you, Jessica, baby. Yeah, what are we going to do? Look, some of you may not have recognized my outfit. Chrissy did introduce me as Richie G. So maybe now I'm going to put on my outfit. I am a history hyena fan who has a lot of money

and lives in Kansas City or wherever the fuck you live. I don't remember. Yeah, and I'm representing Colonial Christy, or as I like to call it, the good old days. Yeah, so Halloween has happened, but because Venetia is Greek, and I'm Greek, much like Easter, we celebrate Greek Halloween, which comes after the regular Halloween.

Which comes after the regular Halloween. Venetia is dressed up. I don't know if she wants to come on camera, but she's wearing a big gold chain, an American flag, a mask that says it's sleep, which is the opposite of woke, and a scully hat and tight jeans that are especially tight on her upper thighs and ass. And she's Chrissy Q-ing on. And here's the deal.

Well, that's because my jeans are tight on my thighs and ass because I've got a fat, fat ass. Venetia right now is shivering a little bit she's a little upset yeah she's a little upset because the cold hard truth is this is that donnie t wanted he won big she's a little upset she's a little concerned for her mother's mental health and actually her circulatory system that Donnie T may pull this off. And if Chrissy Cunanan is right, if Chrissy Cunanan, Chrissy Cunanan, Chrissy Chaos, Chrissy Colonial, Chrissy is correct.

Donnie T's got a shot if his friends who surprisingly voted for him have anything to say about it. Absolutely, cuz I support the gays. I love the gays. But unfortunately, in this election, I had to vote straight, and that was red. Why? Because if you vote blue, you're gay, which is acceptable. But I mean, Joe Biden is just an old gay man, and Joe Biden is moments away, I would say, from being able to get to that gay part of heaven and dance with the one and only Chris

Pappas. Yeah, cuz. I hope you guys have just enjoyed my costume as history hyena fan richie g but i gotta take it off because i don't believe in coronavirus it's what it is it's not real uh yeah cuz i mean make no mistake if today's monday if joe biden wins if joe biden wins then make no mistake i'm just gonna live the rest of my life in a fucking wonton cup because we're getting sold to china a lot of 14 because it's what it is we're gonna do an episode on the electoral college which is what keeps this country great now here's the thing i don't even have to go

into character piece because chrissy is dressed as somebody from a different century where they had different values and they use different terminology to describe certain things it's what it is because you right now are in costume inhibiting somebody from that era who would who would who would who would think and say the things that you're saying yeah i'm just kidding around but i am going to vote like this tomorrow in bay ridge and it will be accepted cuz and it's what it is and when i get back home and beat the shit out of my wife and i just want to say to the muslim community that I don't have. We are completely not Islamophobic.

Friendly. We love Allah as you can see. Please don't come and cut our heads off. Please. Please don't come and cut our heads off. Dave Chappelle will be hosting Saturday Night Live.

He is a devout Muslim and he hates Lorne Michaels because he's Jewish and it's just the truth. It's just what it is. It's just Eslo KS but we have to play pretend like all these people

are great people. They're all pieces of absolute dog shit. Yeah, people are not who they purport to be. That's why Shakespeare said the world is a stage, but Christian Yannis, we come at you in a different way, and that's gay. We come at you in a different gay way.

I'm tired of the fucking absolute bullshit. Like we have to play pretend like celebrities get naked telling you vote just get naked and tell me to vote for joe biden okay i hate when you say make sure your voice is heard you just want to make sure my voice is heard democrat and if you fucking said that i think more people would have voted democrat but unfortunately you want to lie and hide beyond your fucking naked bullshit and now one two three four more four more here we go i just want to say this there's been a lot

of patriots that have lived in this country absolutely okay a lot of people would say a lot of people would say paul newman great patriot yeah paul the great patriot james woods great patriot james madden great patriot james madden great patriot but there's no greater patriots in this country nobody cares as deeply deeply about America as actors who live in Hollywood. Yes. Does anyone care about this country more than them? They absolutely care. I mean, you know, Mark Ruffalo, he really cares.

He's only got one vote, and it keeps him up at night. And it keeps him up at night. And, Mark, unfortunately, you lost. I'll tell you what. If him and your mom had a fist fight to get one more vote each, your mom's coming out the victor because she would like to have two, and her votes would go the opposite way. Go the opposite.

I mean, it was really a tough thing when I told my mom that the situation voted Trump. She was like, wow, I kind of like her again. That's really the only thing. i just got lightheaded yeah i just got lightheaded because when you hit me deep like that that means my blood pressure drops and that's when the that's when i the feminine yannis takes over and i because i have the blood pressure of a woman the thing is yeah when when i told my mom when i told my mom listen you know she voted trump all of a sudden that tit tat doesn't look like it kind of looks like a birthmark now all of a sudden, that tit-tat doesn't look like, it kind of looks like a birthmark now. All of a sudden, it looks like, God, it doesn't look so bad.

All of a sudden, those fakes, they just look like beautiful breasts that can feed offspring. All of a sudden, it don't look too bad anymore. All of a sudden, you know, the bike sex videos, it just looks like someone who's into their fitness. She had to go back and pray about it and be like, find out what her,

maybe she was wrong. What was her issue? She was like, I was blind, but now I can see. Now I can now i can see now i can see that actually and she's like maybe you should marry her maybe you should have because you know because we did what was right now cuz why the fuck does binky have the right now i'm all for freedom i believe in democracy and freedom and people should be able to do what they do but should binky be able to walk around in that outfit can now is that and and tell us that he's actually from queens is that possible or do we need to fucking dunk his head in the east river and straighten this kid out we need to straighten

this i need to come see this kid in a fucking different way if he comes wearing those fucking color me bad shorts one more time yeah i mean because if we ever get john a light in this studio to come see him in a different way if he he's wearing that outfit, I mean, it may end up bad for the kid. Because you're wearing fucking like rap backup dancer from 1991. You look like you're in a Kwame video. And then on top, you look like you're about to sell me weed in the 70s. I want to come see you in a different fucking way. Let's be honest.

Let's be honest. Binky, yeah, you're dressed like I'm on acid. I mean, you know, me and Yanni are in fucking costumes. You know? I'm dressed like costumes. Yeah. And teeth and douche. And teeth and douche.

He turns into teeth and douche. Wow. So wait, you're dressed as Chrissy and you're dressed as Venetia. It's what it is. That's what it is. We did opposite. That's hilarious. That's a 10.

We got to come up. Yeah, we got to get them on camera. We'll put pictures up. How do we put them on camera? In the post, we'll put pictures up. Yeah. Not even in post. Just keep talking.

We're in F&B. I'll just take pictures while we're on air. The truth is the four of us in here have absolutely no business, and we legally, 100% legally, should not be allowed to vote. I don't know why us as citizens have the right to fucking vote. It's very, very, very stupid. We shouldn't be allowed to vote. We don't know anything now here's

it's stupid he's absolutely right don't vote and yeah yeah we're comedians like look in the comedy world we don't matter stop some guy was messaging me he messaged me on my personal account and then he went on the history of heinous you know it funny? He actually messaged us and said that because he suspected that I was a real Democrat that you guys should let me go from the show, which was, I should have saved the message. Did you see it? Oh, saved it? Do we have it?

Let's post that. You know what's funny? He was asking me to fire me. You fucking idiot. You fucking idiot. I shouldn't have blocked the guy. I should have kept talking to him, but here's the deal.

I told you a million times, I don't vote. I haven't voted. I just will not vote. I've never voted in my guy. I should have kept talking to him. But here's the deal. I told you a million times, I don't vote. I haven't voted. I just will not vote. I've never voted in my life, and I will never vote. Okay? I have my personal opinions of who should win. And I think my opinion is, I think it's time we have a dictator, because I don't want Putin

getting involved in our elections anymore. It's what it is, because I actually voted. I'll tell you exactly why I voted for it. I did the mail-in ballot, and I voted for Joe Hangenson, the independent party. Party and I was like he seems like a good guy and then I found out it's a woman So that's just what it is. Well, Joe Joe Hagen said or whatever was on the ballot New York some fucking woman and I and I thought it was a guy cuz so nobody cares cuz you would make a you Look like a Hessian right now. Yeah, I dress as a Hessian cuz I'm a fucking German Hessian right now I'm the headless horseman right now. Yeah, Are you dressed as a Hessian? Because I'm a fucking German Hessian right now. I'm the Headless Horseman

right now. Yeah. So you put on a lot of weight. Like, can you tell? Yeah. Yeah. This looks,

welcome back to the bracket with Chris DiStefano and Giannis Papas in 2013. So now it's finally popped. Yeah. We'll put it under Patreon. We'll do a comparison

of how we look now and then how we lived it to. Did you, have you ever come back and looked at, because I thought I was the only fat one and then I recently went and looked at like a frame from that no and you were

you were chrissy cream puffs i'm not i don't think i we've reached that weight yet though you and i no well we're close though i'm more comfortable being fat than you are yeah because you you your feminine brain has been activated recently yes because you texted me that you're i will be your husband and yes you say yeah What are you reading what are you the disturbing the level of disturbing text? Yeah that I have to receive from Chris Yeah, I mean out of nowhere. He goes you will I will make you my husband. Yeah, I will get you I was drinking on Halloween. Yeah, I was drinking on Halloween and I've also been I've also been secretly texting your wife talking about Outlander and how hot Jamie is, the lead actor in that.

Me and your wife, I mean, we just have conversations about Outlander. Yeah, I said, well, first, I mean, well, what did we say? First of all, where'd you get that fucking futuristic machine in your hand? Yeah. Are you a time traveler? Yeah, because I said I ordered, we did order a Trumpy Bear for the studio. So that's just what happened yeah and it's it's what it is and I got one and I right now I have it on on my girl's father's

urn because he was a big Trump supporter so so his is yeah I said I said cuz you said to me you said you said to me you said to me cuz you think a jab from a bird would hurt as bad as a jab from a woman? And then I said, cuz, I want to do whatever to make you happy. You're my husband and I know one day you'll be mine. And you said, what you said is so disturbing. It made my skin crawl. And then I wrote, Adolph is the only person that could save our country. Cuz, we're just joking around. Here's the thing. We have a good time yeah we're just having a good time yeah and then i sent you a picture of a side by side of george muris on in one of our podcast

friends yeah she's a great girl who i who i have called uh, don't say it. Yeah. I got to do dips. Yeah. I got to get back into. Cuz, am I blown out? Am I blown out in this costume? Cuz, you're blown. When I changed my shirt, you could tell I'm blown out again? You could tell you're blown out again. The gut?

Yeah. But it's just what. But my face isn't blown out, right? Cuz, you're. You know, you're the. You're. You got the same problems that I got. You're just handsomer.

Yeah. You got the same problems I got. Yeah. So on handsomer. But you got the same problems I got. So on certain days, see how I just look like less of a cute kid? You look full-blown retarded from some angles or some situations. But then head-on, I look cute. Head-on cute and in certain shirts. When you do a pilot and they put you in a button-down, you look good. But then when you make your own dressing decisions? It's bad. I mean, it's fucking, there's a button down. Yeah. You look good. But then when you make your own dressing decisions.

It's bad. I mean, it's fucking, there's a chain out. I mean, the other day you sent me a picture with that with the chain out. I mean, he's got, look at, I mean, when you make your own.

I mean, I got a Bay Ridge Boys shirt on underneath my George Washington costume. Yeah, and those are, your socks are puke green. Yeah, they're puke green because, and if you think I'm going to give this costume back,

accept this because this makes me feel like a fucking agate and I like it. Because next year I'm going as Andre Agassi. Agassi. Because the Electoral College is what the episode's about. There's history of it.

It basically, we're the only country that uses this. Every other first world nation does the popular vote, but we use the Electoral College, and it is, yes, based in slavery times, and they've actually been trying to overturn this since the early 1800s, Bob. Well, the Democrats really wanted to be overturned because if it wasn't for the Electoral College, the Republicans would never win a presidential election. That's the irony.

You want to hear some real irony? Because Republicans are against government intervention and government regulation. But the Electoral College is the ultimate government regulation for elections because without it, they wouldn't win because all the people live on the coast. But here's the deal. We are not a democracy. We're a republic.

People often don't know the difference. What is the difference? The United States of America, meaning the way Jefferson saw it, and he kind of won out, is these are all these different countries united under this umbrella but they each each state votes like it's its own country in a way right as a governor they got different laws right I mean no other country where you go to where the law is different in the top of Sweden in the bottom of Sweden I mean it's just like so then how do we fix this do we just fucking let it break up I mean I'm all about I've been reading a lot of

self-help books and it's all about letting go. I mean, why don't we listen to fucking Elsa from Frozen and just let it go? We're just, we gotta love our differences. That's what makes us unique. I mean, if you go to Greece, the law's the same. If you're in the top of Greece, you can have sex with a goat.

If you're at the bottom of Greece, you can have sex with a goat. That's what it is. It doesn't change from state to state. By the way, do you like the baby gift I sent? That is another thing. I do like it very much. I sent you baby gift to you and your wife.

Yeah, and I will say- Did any of your other guy friends do that? No, and yeah, let's talk about that in a second. It's what it is. It's the United States of America, different countries. Okay, so here we go. With the Electoral College, it started, it was all voting on the Constitution. So the South was pro-slavery, and the North was anti-slavery.

And basically, the North had so many more people, and the South knew that if it's just a popular vote, the North's going to fucking win because we don't let our slaves vote. So then the South came up with the three-fifths of a person law, which basically made slaves three-fifths of a person just so they could vote, the three-fifths clause, just so they could vote, and this whole electoral college thing, and it would, like, balance everything out. So it was kind of fucking, it is kind of based in slavery.

We do have to admit that, no? Well, I think there's a strong argument to be made for that, but I think Venetia made these notes, so we'd have to do full research. Did you make these notes, Venetia? Okay, so this is coming from a communist point of view. So, because she says in black lettering,

in bold lettering, even after the US finally abolished slavery and eventually gave black Americans the right to vote, white southern leaders found ways to keep them from voting, like discriminating laws like the Grandfather Clause, literacy tests, poll taxes, and acts of violence. Let's be crystal fucking clear right now. If you gave me a literacy test or some type of test to vote,

I would fail it and not be legally allowed to vote. Yeah, you make a good point. We should not be legal. A lot of people shouldn't be. You should have to pass of test to vote, I would fail it and not be legally allowed to vote. Yeah, you make a good point. We should not be legal. A lot of people shouldn't be. You should have to pass a test to vote. And you should also have to pass a test to be a politician. There should be some sort of philosopher king class that you got to go to where they check how moral you are or something like that.

Didn't Socrates say in his book that democracy, the reason why it's never going to work is because we give the people the right to vote and they shouldn't be allowed to vote. Yeah, and also women too, Shin. Wait, Jong-Jun. Wait, did I just add that? I apologize. You might have just added that.

Yeah, I was just interpreting history my way. Here's the deal, but all those things are true. That did happen, but I think there was a big part of this, and correct me if I'm wrong, and our fans always will in the comments, the ones who are like a little crazy about history, but a lot it is state it's more of a state's rights thing it's more of like hey we want to make sure each state has a say even though our populations may be

different for example and they think that that's right because like hey look Iowa gives us all our corner and wrestlers or whatever right right so it's like they're saying hey we feed you guys we need to say, just because you got more people doesn't mean you're more important than I am. And there's something to be said about that. There's something to be said about that. We need fucking wrestlers, cuz. Yeah, we need wrestlers.

Otherwise it's gonna be fucking Dagestan. He's controlling the MMA. We need a couple kids from Iowa. We need a couple kids from fucking Iowa. Here's the thing. Here's an example of what happened. In 1800, Pennsylvania, which is a big time swing state,

so you better do what's right, Pennsylvania. And it's also where your mom fell in love with the Amish guy. My mother fell in love with an Amish guy there, and it's also where me and my mom escaped to when I was three or four years old. My dad was in gambling debt, and somebody like John Aylant wanted to kill him. Me and my mom escaped to Lancaster, Pennsylvania, and it's why I secretly love the Amish and shoofly pies. Because my dad may just be an Amish kid.

So in 1800, Pennsylvania and Northern state and Virginia, a Southern state had about the same number of free people living there. But Virginia was home to hundreds of thousands of enslaved people who had no freedom. They weren't allowed to vote. And they ended up with more votes in the electoral college than Pennsylvania. That year, those extra electoral votes gave the candidate from Virginia, even though he didn't win the popular vote, just enough to win. And you know who that was? Thomas Jefferson, who, let's be honest, liked to bang out of slaves. That's just something that's part of our history.

That's just something that's what it is. We just have to deal with that. We just have to deal with the fact that there's some black people walking around and their ancestor is Thomas Jefferson. We just have to deal with the fact that if you, if're what's his name lin manuel miranda the guy who made very hamilton very extremely talented but he portrayed a white character even though he's latino and the truth is the truth is is that if i want to play fidel castro i just can't do it that's just the truth even though fidel castro and liam Liam Neeson look exactly like Liam Neeson cannot play Fidel Castro because he's white playing a Latino character.

But if you're a Latino character playing a white, it's no problemo, papa. Yeah, I was about to put him on notice for appropriation. Then I realized I can't put him on notice. No. So I put myself on notice for thinking that I could put him on notice. If that makes sense. Can I just tell you, can Crystal Clear Chrissy just tell you one thing to the camera, babe?

Here's the thing, okay? It's Wednesday right now. Whoever won or if we're in a place where it's gonna take a couple weeks to vote to see who's the president, whoever becomes president, if you're the kind of fucking kid that all you ever wanna do

is get free handouts and say this person is keeping me from that and that person's keeping me from that because you fucking don't wanna work hard hard then your life's not going to change if you're the kind of person who makes their own luck and makes things happen despite whatever misfortunes you believe you're you were born with also your life's not going to change because the truth is change comes from within not who you voted for okay so if your fucking guy didn't win do me a favor and don't fucking cry

about it and be a little bitch just get up and do your job whatever that may be because that's the american spirit no matter what you say you communist fuck aoc yeah dope what do you think of that i think i think that would have been a great speech in present-day america but also if you translate it into german it would be pretty decent as well. Yeah. I mean, I'm sick and tired of these fucking people. Yeah. I mean.

Should I tweet that out or not? No, no. Just tweet it the fuck out. It don't matter. I mean, listen, here's the truth. I'm up for a show on Truth TV. Maybe I'll fucking get it. Maybe I won't.

I mean, they'll listen to this podcast and they'll make a decision. If it gets on, I'm just trying to take a fucking couple of hundo grand out of their fucking pockets and just make it until I got to give it to my baby's mama. Why? So the truth is the podcast is what's going to sustain. Giannis and I, we have to go get COVID tests today and a wardrobe fitting to go two days on Michael Che's HBO Max show, which we'll get paid maybe $1,200 gross. We got to give fucking 10% to our truffle pig, 10% to our agents who do nothing,

5% to a lawyer for reading a fucking bullshit contract that my fucking five-year-old could have wrote and we're gonna net about three four hundred dollars doing four days of work on hbo max that nobody's gonna see ever we make the real money here we move the real people here we put asses in the seat here so thank you for your support patreon.com slash bay ridge boys history hyenas.com tv movies all that bullshit's over We're just doing it because Michael Che's our friend and Giannis just wants to prove that he won the Twitter argument even though he did it.

And that's just why we're doing it. And the truth is, nobody cares. I mean, SNL couldn't be, it's the worst show I've ever seen in my life, actually.

They somehow made Jimmy Carey. Michael Che's gonna come after you now. No, me and Michael Che are fucking boys. No, I'm not Michael. The only part of SNL that I like is fucking Weekend Update.

It's fucking amazing. Weekend Update is fucking amazing. I love Mikey C. But the show, I mean, they've somehow made Jim Carrey not be funny because all they want to do, you better fucking hope and pray Saturday Night Live that Donald Trump wins. Because if he doesn't, your show's over. So you better be on your hands and fucking knees that Donald Trump wins because if he doesn't, your show's over. So you better be on your hands and fucking knees

that that guy wins because if it doesn't, babe, if it doesn't, your show's over because nothing you really say is funny. All you dumb kids, Trevor Noah, you better hope he wins, babe. John Oliver, you're not even from this country, but you better

hope and pray that Donnie T gets four more or your fucking career is over. Nobody cares. You're probably secretly voting for him. That's the truth in the bullshit that I'm sick of, is you're probably all secretly voting for Donnie T. Well, the only difference between me and you is I'm not so secretive about it. I'm public.

Donnie T. No fumare. I think we're going to have to get you out of this outfit because I'm fucking proud to be an American where at least I know I'm public. Donnie T. No fumare. I think we're going to have to get you out of this outfit because... I'm fucking proud to be an American where at least I know I'm free. Yeah, I mean, you are fired up. I'm fired up because I've had enough. I just...

Thank God. Is everything I'm saying funny or do we have to tackle this? No, it's good. It's fine. Do we have to tackle it? No. I'm just kidding. You're speaking from the heart and it's just... Thank God that this podcast is done in America and in English. Because with that fucking type of emotion and the way your hair was flapping around. Yeah. You know?

I like to point it down the middle. Yeah, I mean, do you see the way it's here? You got to admit, me and Chrissy constantly share old World War II footage with each other on Twitter of Adolph. Because he was the most insecure, hilarious kid. And somehow his insecurity took over a whole country. But when you watch it now in retrospect, it's funny to watch how fucking ridiculous he looks when people do.

I mean, is there anything funnier than watching grown men do this when they say it? It's so stupid. It's like a duck flap. It's like a fucking or this thing. It's just so. And then like when his hair flaps around, I mean, if you put him on mute and just watch his hair fly around, it looks it's really looks crazy. Yeah.

Listen. So here's the thing. Here's the thing with the Electoral College is we are aware that it probably should be out. But the thing is, is like Yanni said, it actually saves Republicans. So when it always gets blocked by a Republican, the closest they came was in the 1948 presidential election. That's actually the year Bonnie Rubble was born.

The year Babe Ruth died of throat cancer, either from smoking cigarettes or sucking puss. You never know. Yeah. 1948 presidential election. Could be both. Could be both. Most likely both.

New York ended up being the, New York ended up being the major swing state with Harry S. Truman versus fucking dewey decimal system and republican ed gossett of texas said i have no objection to the negro in harlem voting but i do resent the fact that his vote is worth a hundred times as much as is the vote of a white man in texas so it's one of those things where first of all let's just be honest ed gossett you do have an objection to the negro in total i mean you're a guy from texas in 1948 it's what it is you're fucking lying but that's what's stopped by a republican it's my point that's like starting to sense going like i don't mean to sound defensive but yeah yeah whatever you say i got no objection to but but it's like just i i hope that

at least 2020 you know that people be a little bit more truthful and honest because it's like this political charade bullshit it doesn't work the time's up we nobody trusts the media anymore time's up no time it's fucking up time's up time's up so um you know the problem is with the swing state uh the problem is with the electoral college is the swing states now this whole election is focused on florida and like ohio and it's like why are those two states why are we I mean imagine the balance of our fucking freedom hangs with Florida yeah I mean I think

but I mean if we're gonna end as an empire if we're past peak I think that's apropos now for our election to come if our election is between apropos I mean yeah you're a fucking agate the fact that our election is between a former Hollywood-created reality TV show host, which is basically where he had his most success and people know him,

and then the other guy who's so on the runway. I mean, the captain has said, clear for takeoff. Absolutely, yeah. We got a former WWE star and a Chinese puppet. Yeah, you would really guess that it would come down to a state like Florida to elect one of those two people. We kind of deserve it. We deserve it to be Florida or Ohio to tell us who's going to win.

We fucking deserve this now. I mean, you know, and what can you do? The thing is, though, Bubba, it's just like, you know, whoever wins, it's just like, I mean, you know, and what can you do? The thing is though, Bubba, it's just like, you know, whoever wins, it's just like, I mean, what are you going to do? I mean, yeah, some people's lives are going to change. Some people's won't. I mean, what do you want me to tell you? It's like, everybody wants to get mad at things that were predetermined. I don't even believe anymore. I believe that our subconscious is the thing that's driving this whole vehicle forward. And we like to think that we're making conscious choices, but we're not. Because are you drunk today?

Even the subconscious, because even the the sub i think the subconscious is what's behind the wheel and the conscious is just in the passenger seat to like make believe that you know the subconscious just gave our creator our conscious to like make believe we have free will or whatever but i think the subconscious is just what it's all about i think you're probably right yeah and there's also one other thing you forgot to mention and that is if uh joe biden wins yes venetia will be very happy yeah her mother will be very happy yeah but our fans won't be as happy you want to know why why because the price of the patreon is going up it's what it is because taxes are going up so guess what yeah so Yeah. So are the prices of Patreon. Yeah, so if you are 4,500 Patreon members, I hope you do what's right.

Especially if you live in a swing state. If you want to keep the price of the Patreon down, you'll vote for freedom. Dope. Now, did you vote? Did you stand in line? Now, how come we can't figure out- I mailed it in, cuz. You did?

I did a mail-in because I didn't want to stand in line because I figured tomorrow, you know, I don't know- And who did you vote for? Huh? I voted for Joe Johanson. I mean't want to stay in the line because I figured tomorrow, you know, I don't know. And who did you vote for? Huh? I voted for Joe Johanson. I mean, do we got Trump toilet paper? Yeah. It's what it is.

Yeah. There you go. There's Trump toilet paper. There we go. We got Trump toilet paper. That's what it is, cuz. Yeah. And so what you do is, you know, you make arts and crafts with this with the kids.

It's what it is. Yeah. So this is, we got Trump toilet paper. Now, V, did you vote? You're going to vote tomorrow. You're going to vote tomorrow. If we do, yeah. Yes, we're going to be doing, we're going to be broadcasting.

Either your private gated community is under attack or it's not. Yeah. That's what's going to happen for the rest of the week. It's like either your Gucci store or your subway that you manage is on fire or it's not. Wait, are we doing, are we doing, what are we doing tomorrow for election day? Because I'm staying, I'm moving the baby back to Bay Ridge right now. Get her back. Just because I want her to be safe because Bay Ridge will never burn.

Yeah, because make no mistake. Because all the firefighters put out fires here. If firefighters, Bay Ridge is safe either way you go. Because if Trumpy wins and all the firefighters and cops are here and if Biden wins all the Chinese are here so either way

it's fine yeah it is what it is so you win either way I mean if Biden wins you know you have

his countrymen here the Chinese and when Trump he wins yeah you got the fucking the forces here yeah I mean Trump

Trump tweeted out Trump just Trump tweeted out go follow Chris DeStefano on Twitter. Yeah, and yesterday I just checked his Twitter, and the president of the United States tweeted, don't vote for Joe Biden. Can you pull it up? He's a Castro-loving puppet.

It's like, he's just, you know what that's like? It's like the late rounds, you're behind in the scorecards, and you're just fucking throwing haymakers. He's going like, don't vote for Joe Biden. He fucked his sister. It's just random. Just random shit he's just throwing at the wall. So you think Joey B is going to win in Atlanta?

You think Joey B is up? No, I don't. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Who do you think? If you have to guess, because it's Monday, who's going to? What is Wednesday morning looking like? Tell us.

Yanni Biden. I don't think. Well, the thing is, with all the mail-ins and COVID that the election's not going to be known for a while. No way, right? Which is going to be bad for this country. We are huge sports fans, and there's no better way to watch a game than when you got a little juice on it.

Go to mybookie.com. They've got deposit matches, free bets, and huge cash prize contests for you to take advantage of all season long. All you got to do is put in the promo code HIENAS, H-Y-E-N-A-S, and your dreams will come true with mybookie.com. I've even started doing it, and it's been great. I've been winning lots of money to give to my kid's mom, and it's beautiful. Yeah, football, college football, UFC, any sport, you name it,

go to mybookie.com, promo code hyenas. Yeah! Wild! So it's bad no matter what that it's going to take a while. I don't think it's a shoo-in for Joey B. Right. Because I don't trust those polls because a lot of people don't admit that they're voting for Trump. Because, you know, the left gets like violent and angry if you say that.

Like, yeah, I mean, Venetia just if you told her if I sat down, Venetia said I voted for Donald Trump. She wouldn't be able to ever look at me the same way. But neither would members of my family. I come from every one of my family's Democrats or whatever. That's what it is. So it's like so it's like people hide that fact. So here's a minute. So when people call you the phone and say, who are you vote for?

People aren't going to go Donnie T unless you're calling patty finnegan's house yeah and he's going to put on these colors don't run in the background and he's going to sing it to you yeah well but that's i think a reason too why people are moving away from voting for biden because they want to feel free and it's like you tell i'm free unless i voted for your candidate where a republican is more inclined to be like okay you voted for biden that's fine i think you're stupid but it's fine but if you if a democrat you tell them you voted for trump then they a Republican is more inclined to be like, okay, you voted for Biden, that's fine. I think you're stupid, but it's fine. But if a Democrat, you tell them you voted for Trump,

then they never want to talk to you again. So people don't like, adults don't like that. So I think a lot of adults are saying, well, fuck you then. Then I'm going to vote for Trump

just to piss you off because that's what the human brain does. It concocts fucking me versus you things. This is the thing that I'm, we don't know when you're watching this.

Are they going to be watching this after the election? On the election. When is the earliest it's going to come out? Wednesday. Earliest it's coming out is Wednesday.

Here's the thing that worries me. I would be worried. I mean, you know, this is how sad our news is. This is basically, you're watching a news show right now because this is what they do. They go, this is what worries me.

It's like, nobody cares. Just tell us the fucking news. But anyway. The news is a talk show, by the way. CNN and Fox News are talk shows. I don't consider them news anymore. They're talk shows. It's entertainment. It's content. They're talk shows. But anyway. The news is a talk show, by the way. CNN and Fox News are talk shows. I don't consider them news anymore. They're talk shows. It's entertainment.

It's content. They're talk shows. Yeah, it's content. They're talk shows with different guests on. Yeah, yeah. It's characters. Yeah, it's all talk shows. So it's an all-character piece.

It's like, yeah, that's what moves tickets. It's just what it is. It's what moves tickets is the more extreme you are, it moves tickets. Yeah. So this is what worries me is that again, I think people are voting against Trump. And I think that's a mistake. Last time it was like, people weren't thrilled about Hillary.

She was a candidate who was under investigation by the FBI. Right. You know, and that's not a good look when you're running the FBI's investigating, no matter whether she did or not. I'm just saying it's like, if the Democrats were smart, they would have been like, Hey, Hillary, maybe not this one. Maybe not, you know, you're a polarizing figure. You're being investigated by the FBI.

Maybe this isn't your time. So, and again, Biden is that same kind of like, nobody's thrilled about him. They're just kind of vote. It's not really a vote for Biden-Harris. It's kind of an anti-Trump vote. So my point is the people who are enthusiastic about Trump are enthusiastic about Trump. Whereas the other people aren are enthusiastic about trump are enthusiastic about trump yes

whereas the other people aren't enthusiastic about the characters they're just doing an anti-trump and i don't know if that's enough well that's what that's that's what i've been thinking where i'm like the people who are lining up who haven't voted yet who want to make their voice heard on tuesday majority of those people are going to be trump people because they want to go and vote and they want to do and they don't care about covet as much and And like, I'm fucking going in person. I'm going to do it. So those votes don't count yet. And it's still very close with all the countable votes and the real majority, 90 million plus people that are probably going to vote for Trump. They haven't even turned, they're coming out tomorrow. But I see it. The only thing I disagree with you on

is that I think even less people want Biden. People were, I think, a healthy percentage of people last election that actually did like Hillary. They liked her. Nobody that I've talked to actually likes Joe Biden and think that he's a good presidential candidate. They're just like, I will put anybody in. I could put fucking Tickle Me Elmo for the Democrats. They vote for him just to get Trump out. So that doesn't bring passion, like you said. And let's be honest.

If you're voting for... Do we have to water this plant, by the way? No, that's not a plant. Okay, is it a fake? It's not a plant. Okay. Let's be honest.

If you're voting for Trump, you're going to go out and stand in line because you're actually voting for your own interests. Yes, that's what I mean. And it's usually financial. Sure.

Less taxes, stuff like that. Less regulation, private healthcare, all that shit. So those people actually proactively go and vote whereas let's be honest veneti and her friends sometimes just a pick on the gram is enough yeah it's because i mean what do they even really know i mean it's just sort of saying hey fuck trump and then it's almost like you voted the biggest thing are they really gonna go stand online they're gonna be like fuck this if i can't snapchat this

shit or fucking eat a quinoa salad right now i'm not staying more than 45 minutes people already saw me on the gram they already know that i'm a good person yeah so i don't need to do this so it's just what it is and i think yeah i mean how funny would it be if new york went red i mean if new york went red just because only long island and staten island voted yeah it would be funny well i think there is a i mean in bay ridge the lines to vote were four and a half hours. So it's like, it could be a deterrent, but that's what, more to your point, I think the person that's more likely

to stand four and a half hours in the line is a person who loves Trump as opposed to a person who just hates Trump and wants someone they don't love in. Love is stronger than hate. Yeah. Love is stronger than hate. And hopefully that wins this election

because we are running against a, let's see, Venetia, correct me if I'm wrong, rapist? What did you say when I said I voted for Trump? Racist? Rapist? I said racist.

Racist? Misogynist? No, yeah, I said racist. Misogynist? Corrupt. Corrupt misogynist corrupt corrupt sexual sexual offender sexual offender yeah i did on the group on our group chat on a hyenas group chat i played a little prank and i sent a ballot a fake ballot that had donald trump written in and i sent to the group chat and i said i did what was right and then tia said you, Chris, for voting for a rapist, sexist piece of shit. And it was funny.

And I side texted Giannis and said, she believed me. Now, Binky, you were just in the row with an open comedian Republican. Yeah, open Republican comedian. What does the middle of the country look like? What do you think? Nobody seemed to care at all. Right. As soon as I landed, it was the most politics I've heard in a month.

Wow. So you think if there are riots, they will be in the coastal cities? Yeah, we're going to destroy ourselves and then the middle will be fine. Middle will be fine. Middle doesn't care. So in the middle,

you think if you said I voted for Trump, they'd be like, that's cool. If I said I voted for Biden, that's cool. They'd be like, just get off my land. They don't care. It's all about staying off their property, really. Right. Which is, listen, when you have, you know,

you got a kid now, your wife's kids, and you own property, that's just what it becomes about it's just easy when you're renting living with your roommates to fucking fight for change nobody gives a fuck about you you don't really make a difference it's the landowners and the people that have kids that they're raising our vote we gotta fucking say something what do you what what's gonna change for you you're 55 years old with cats eating fucking ramen noodles, going to fucking bullshit concerts, having fucking picnics in Central Park with masks on.

You think anybody gives a, you only give a fuck about you. And you don't count. Maybe your parents' money counts, which just allows you to fucking live in New York and live your dream because you fucking mommy and daddy pay for it.

What, you work in a bullshit startup? Shut the fuck up. You just do what Cardi B tells you to do and suck my ass. Here's the thing yesterday we took an hour off the clocks yesterday was daylight savings we lost an hour but i'm fucking loving this because chrissy added a few hours to his day yeah because he's fucking he is throwing some long days out there throwing some fucking long day because the fatter my ass gets

the longer my dates get it's what it is he is now walking out of the studio. Yeah, I mean, the part of that rant that was a little strange for us was when you said property owners because that was the old argument that used to be in America is that you couldn't vote unless you had property.

Oh, yeah. No, no, no. I believe everybody. I believe everybody should vote. Everybody can vote. But yeah, and let's be honest. I mean, more,

less and less white people are owning property and it's going a little bit more Chinese. That's actually funny. Because if, more, less and less white people are owning property. And it's going a little bit more Chinese. That's actually funny. Because if China, I'll tell you what. If the Chinese, if the property owners in America really had a vote, then Biden would win. Because most of them, at least in New York, are Chinese.

I know. That's what I'm saying. So that would be big. Biden should change the law. If that guy wanted to win, all the, because the Chinese are coming in. They're fucking giving their people. They're subsidizing programs for their fucking citizens to come here get a bullshit work visa buy the property then go back to china so if they could fucking if if weishan qian and ben

falka cast their vote biden would win big he would win big yeah and all the ballots would be in chinese they'd be all in the ballots are in chinese anyway yeah they are now right ballots are in chinese look i look i to take this off my throat. I'm for it. I think it's time. I don't think democracy lasts, to be honest with you. We're doing this election episode. I don't think it lasts.

You look back at history. You know, Rome started. It had a Senate. It had the people. And it had like a king. That didn't work. That didn't work. Eventually, it was dictated.

It eventually became Romania. Now it's just Romaniaia now it's just now it's just united nobody cares about that this is here's romania right here romania i mean eventually caesar's you know the the majority of the roman rule was all dictators see they call them caesars but those guys were fucking dictators you like a caesar salad i think it's time we just we just let the rock run the country until yes oh let the rock and vice president's cardi be who gives a shit just fucking put andrew schultz in office just do it already turn your phone just do it already the kid grows five mil easy kid made five million easy akash still living in the three-floor walk-up

it's what it is it's democracy baby it's what we want yo because akash a funny kid but he also speaks to that fucking demographic which is like three billion on the planet and they all speak English because that's an official language in India and if you don't think

Schultz he screwed in and thought about that and how that boosts his number you're gonna know the thing coming I mean cuzzy it's what it is cuz cuz it's what it is

we gotta get ourselves a fucking Indian sidekick on this show yeah cuz the best hotel ain't continent Wei Zhongzhen Wei Zhongzhen a lot of portraits I invited him on the podcast a fucking Indian sidekick on this show. Yeah, because Nimesh Patel ain't caught in it. Wei Zhongzhen. Wei Zhongzhen.

A lot of portraits. I invited him on the podcast for next week. Yeah. So patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. I booked Nimesh Patel independently. Let's do that.

Yeah. I booked him and what we're going to do is for patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys we're going to start interviewing him and he's going to have

a Go Great podcast and his mic's going to be off the whole time and then at the end of the fucking podcast we're going to start interviewing him and he's going to have a Go Great podcast and his mic's going to be off the whole time and then at the end of the fucking podcast we're going to beat the shit out of him with wiffle ball bats

and that's going to be on the kamikaze. That's going to be a kamikaze. That's going to be our kamikaze episode and then we're going to do a Patreon episode

where we have Joe DeRosa fight James Madden and see who wins. Yeah, we're going to have Joe DeRosa fight. We just want to see if any of them can lift their arms up and punch. Yeah, we're going to have Joe DeRosa fight. We just want to see if any of them can lift their arms up and punch. Yeah, we're going to have Joe DeRosa fight James Madden

for the fucking title of Agate of the Year. Yeah. Whoever wins gets to be commissioner of comedy. Yeah, he gets to be the commissioner of comedy. Yeah. Or Joe DeRosa, he won't even take the title. He'll just be the commissioner because he's quit comedy. And he asked me if I wanted to be a guest on his show with Corinne Fisher talking politics.

The answer is no. Yeah, I got asked to go do that show tomorrow night on election night. And the answer is no, Joe DeRocha, because I got a family. And they're boarding up fucking Manhattan. The last place I want to be is near you and the fucking stand. Yeah, I just had a newborn baby. I love you, Joey D. I really do,

but I'm not gonna be outside on election night. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Chrissy said it before. When you get yourself a little property, the next thing you know

is you just find yourself armed. Yeah. Tim Dillon said to me, he said, look, you better just learn how to thrive in the chaos. And I said, I think I am thriving

if by thriving you mean I'm armed. Yeah. Because I got a gun. You got a gun and i'm fucking next in line to move to new hampshire because i've had enough now of living in new york city and these fucking people trying to dictate what they want me to do it's like figure your own life out and let me do what i'm doing yeah there it is because if i look fat that if i look at that you post it. No, from the side, you look like bad news in the 1700s. It's what it is. Yeah, from the side, you actually, like, if I saw that,

if you saw that, actually, that is a Hessian's outfit, right? I don't know. Can we look up? He's dressed as a Hessian. No, but blue, I think blue's the Continental Army. I'm Chrissy Continental. I'm Chrissy Continental Breakfast. Blue's definitely Democrat or fucking, you're a Tar Heel. Oh, yeah's- I'm Chrissy Continental Breakfast. Blue's definitely Democrat or fucking,

you're a Tar Heel. Oh, yeah. The only problem with this fucking thing is it's blue. It's blue. Yeah, that's the problem. You're supposed to come

as a red coat. No, the blue's- Is that Hessians? That's Hessians, yeah. So you are dressed as a Hessian. It's what it is because I'm a German kid. Yeah, and yeah,

I mean, why were they wearing other people's fucking hair over their hair? I don't know, cuz- Who started that? It's wild. Because they used to wear wigs and shoes.

Because everybody in the 1700s was Marisa. I mean, how did those styles start where it just became okay to wear somebody's hair? And then the hair color was gray. I don't know. Because when I'm watching that show Outlander, and it's an amazing show. I just finished all five seasons and jamie who and and claire who are the the main couple i mean jamie's got fire engine red hair he's fucking hot as a dot and and and and some of these people in the show in colonial america are wearing wigs but then they take the wig off and

they have beautiful hair so i don't understand why you want to cover those gorgeous locks if you got fucking nice hair. I don't get it. It's a really weird thing. It's the same thing like Orthodox Jewish women shave their hair and then they put a wig on of somebody else's hair. You want to talk about Trump supporters? Let's talk Orthodox Jews. I mean, they're going big. I mean, they love Donny T.

I mean, who do you think is a bigger enemy to the Jewish people right now? Nazi Germany or Bill de blasio oh my god they don't like real name is william wilhelm or something like that fucking billy de blasio is a fucking sick ashen yeah yeah how was he wait why do they wear wigs v i'm sorry yeah okay so wigs were what you want to read it no it just indicates class class okay so so the poor weren't wearing wigs it couldn't afford them. Frequently wore gray wigs. Tradesman's usually done. Brown wigs.

White wigs were reserved for judges and military officers. Wow, so I'm dressed like a fucking judge right now. Yeah, and here's the deal. I think when people get rich and they have kind of, you know, they just get a little disconnected from reality and they make those weird decisions. Like, you ever notice with Jimmy Choo shoes, they start to look fucking weird and clunky,

and now it's, like, trendy to wear, like, wear like stupid sneakers not those I like the Venetias but like you know those like clunky fucking things that like Lady Gaga where they look stupid they look like sneakers you would get and then you see Kanye West Kanye West's fucking new wheezes look like people tires they look like fucking dinosaur shoes I mean they're they look like melted crocs and they're going for like 700 so people make weird fashion decisions the more detached they get from reality and they become that detached from reality because they got that much money and they remove themselves from the people just wear starberries is what i'm trying to say they're made at the same factories as the nikes and they cost 20 and they light up when you fucking run

it's what it is because i just did a video i just did a video while we were talking just like in the moment behind the scenes i'm gonna put on pod but is it too much of a giveaway if i just said at history and his episode drops wednesday going to be great again no that's actually funny okay i'm gonna put it i put the jewish guy with the thumbs up yeah just do it i love the jewish guy that you've been sending people to yeah and i also like that you yelled at someone on twitter and you called him a guy and it was a hot chick who was asking about your show. I knew you were moving veggies when I saw that. Yeah, I mean, I've been

going fucking wild, wild, wild on Twitter, tweeting out wild shit. I mean, it's not like me, but I am Chrissy Chaos and make no mistake, moment by moment, I am losing followers by trying to be somebody I'm not. Yeah, it's what it is. It doesn't matter. Just be who you are. You're Chrissy Chaos.

People like it. People understand it. And here's the people when they get like successful and they get big, they just become a little tyrannical. Like Timmy Dillon now, he's shooting off. He's skyrocketing.

And at some point, he's just going to start wearing a wig like that. Yeah, he's going to start walking around in a wig like that. And he looks good now, Timmy. He's lost a bunch of weight. He's lost a bunch of weight.

His skin looks clean. What is he doing? Is he doing keto? He's starting a cult. He rented He's lost a bunch of weight. His skin looks clean. What is he doing? Is he doing keto? He's starting a cult. He rented out an Airbnb and he's got fucking openers sleeping at his house and he's just making cult videos.

That's what it is, yeah. Unfortunately, that opener doesn't realize he gets jerked off to when he falls asleep. That's what it is. But he's a good kid. I mean, it's just what it is.

Cuz, I mean, what do you want? Do you want to be in this business or not? Then you're going to have to get a little fucking glue to the ear when you're sleeping. You're going to have to get a little fucking Timmy mist

if you want to open for these sold out shows. I'll do the same. Me, Chrissy, and Timmy, that's why we're such good friends. That's why we're fucking familia. It's because we're three guys who just are a little bit

three dollar bills. We're put together in weird ways. Timmy Dillon, he looks like Brian Dennehy, but make no mistake, when I put him in my Tesla and I accelerated, he giggled like a school girl.

It's what it is. And it's funny to see a 6'4 fucking 300 he giggled like a schoolgirl. It's what it is. And it's funny to see a 6'4 fucking 300 pound guy giggle like a schoolgirl at acceleration. Yeah, he loved it. He fucking loved it. Yeah, and because the reason

why I had to take this thing off because it was choking my neck and I was starting to get hard. So it's what it is. It's what it is. So here we are on election day. We don't know what's going on. Right now you're tuned in

to either Fox or CNN, whatever your cult little, what tickles your tribal mind clit. You're watching that and you're going, oh boy, is he going to win? Is he going to win? Venetia's mother is on a fucking defibrillator right now. Right now. So do the right thing and don't vote.

And let's try to get, yeah, do the right thing. Do not vote. We want to try to get a dictator in to end voting. To end voting. That'd be great. Yeah, that's it. We don't want any more interference from the Russians. The only way to do that

is have a dictator so there's no elections anymore. Yeah, so we'll see. So maybe this might be the last year with the Electoral College. I mean, go Google the Electoral College.

We barely talked about it. So go Google what it's about. We got a YouTube video that we could post. I mean, because we just wanted to go wild. The truth is, we fucking do in this podcast,

just to tell you, I echo what Yanni says, don't vote unless you're in Florida, Ohio. Then your vote kind of maybe matters. But the truth of the situation is this is it's probably all rigged anyway and there's no way they're counting all these fucking votes with all the election meddling they don't have the time to do that the winner has been predetermined and joe biden and donald trump know who it is we don't know who it is but we'll make they'll make believe

like it was a scandal they already know who the fucking they already know the president is all these people are friends trump and biden and obama and clint who the fucking, they already know who the president is. All these people are friends. Trump and Biden and Obama and Clinton, they're all friends. They all know each other. They're all fucking elitists. They don't care about any of us. But go ahead, vote. If you got nothing to do, get out.

Get some fresh air. Go vote. I mean, oh, here, here's another fun fact. It's the 100th year. It's the 100th year that women are allowed to vote in the USA, August 1920. In August of 1920 is when the 19th Amendment was passed and women were granted the right to vote.

And just 100 years later, after women have the right to vote, our country is in chaos and about to deteriorate and crumble and wash away by the ocean. So there you go. If you're living in a non-American country, do what you can to make sure women can't vote anymore or else you're going to become us. Wait a second. You forgot about one fun fact. What's the fun fact?

60% of white women, I think at least, maybe even more, voted for Trump last time. It's what it is. So do you really want to take away the vote? Because that might have tipped the scale for Donny T. Oh, yeah. So just for this election, they can't. No, I'm kidding.

That's a beautiful thing. 100-year anniversary. Congrats to women. Yeah, congrats. Yeah. Congrats to biological women and women who are trans. All women. All women.

Women. And we're talking about people with uteruses and people without. All women. All women. Now, here's the deal. I think it's really an interesting fact. That was a fun one from 2016 for me yes that a woman was running and most white women did not vote for yeah my stepmother did not

vote for so v how can we how can we get women to get along because when you guys get unified that one or two times that's happened in history yeah yeah like how do you because i'll tell you what getting naked and having cardi b be a spokesperson just ain't working it's so what else can we do yeah is cardi b gonna sit down with uh joe biden one more time i hope for a hard hitting interview that for the people again yeah i hope so yeah or yeah so what what can what can what can we do as a woman what can we do women to get them to vote for biden and uh and harris the first african-american president who's not african-american that's what it is well i think that's pretty dope that there's good there's a vp who's a female so

that's number one can we offer them fucking scented candles or something from qvc something people money talks it's the economy, stupid. What do white women like? They like fucking, they like jeggings and they like scented candles. What can we give them? I think that some women just don't see themselves represented in government.

So it's like kind of weird. So they're like, oh, I'm just going to do what I'm used to. So I think that people need to give them a chance. I mean, there's a lot of change that is happening and your vote does matter. Yes, electoral votes, it's fucked, but when you go to vote, there's popular votes on the other people

that are on the ballot. So guys, I think that you should vote. It's not just the president. But when you say you want them to vote, do you mean it the same way Lady Gaga does? Just vote whoever it is for? No, I mean... I say... No, no, no, because I want same way Lady Gaga does? Just vote whoever it is for? No, I mean, I say, you know how I say it. No, no, no, because I want to ask Lady Gaga.

She said, make sure you go out there and vote. So Lady Gaga, are you talking to the people who are going to vote Trump? Should they vote? Do you want them to vote or do you want them to stay home? They would actually be more effective if like Leonardo DiCaprio was like, look, if you're voting Trump, stay home.

Yeah, that's what I've been saying. That's why I'm so angry this part, because I've had enough of the bullshit. It's like, we know when the celebrities say vote, just tell us that you want us to vote for Biden. Just be honest. Yeah. Be honest, please.

That's all I'm asking. You would do yourself so much better fucking lying. They're always lying. I think no matter who wins, they shouldn't allow be allowed to tweet yes i that's one thing i would say i don't think you should be able to president can't have twitter you can't have twitter anymore so it can't be like you take we can't put you can't maybe start a world war when you're taking a shit yeah that can't be it can't be it can't be like

i'm bored taking a shit let me tweet this out about king jung-fun yeah whatever who's definitely dead and being propped up to whoever the people responsible for making uh kim jong-un stay alive when he's already dead are the same people that created joe biden it's the same thing whoever that makeup artist is you deserve a fucking award because kim jong-un's been dead since april and joe biden's been dead since about the late 80s and long live long live ali wong she doesn't believe communism could ever happen in america yeah well it's, Ali, and it's happening soon. So here's the thing. Also, another quick thing, too, which I don't know if a lot of people do,

is you actually, as a citizen, when you're voting, you're not really voting for the president. You're voting for your elected official to vote for the president. So whomever, you know, it goes back to the Electoral College. So we don't actually we vote for our state representative to say who we voted for and many states have laws that say you legally have to vote for who the people said but there are a few states that don't have that law so there have been a couple times in history where the popular vote has went one way but the electoral

college vote has went the other way because that human being decided, I'm not going to vote for that. Which that I agree with in the sense of, we should have people who are skilled in the art of voting and know everything there is to know about politics to make the most informed decision for the country men and women. We can't have somebody voting like me who just listens to a little tidbits of hearing.

I mean, I vote for who Yanni's tweets tell me to vote for. Yeah. And Yanni's tweets have subliminally been telling me to vote for Trump. So that's what I'm doing. Yeah. My tweets have explicitly said, don't vote. Let's support the next strong authoritarian who rises up and starts talking in any open air.

Whoever's got the most charisma, who's talking strong, I'm going to start going to those rallies and I support a dictator. Because I really did vote for Joe Johangetson who I thought was a guy. Who is that? It's somebody on the New York ballot. When you look at the ballot,

here, when you look at the ballot, it's on, she was on the New York ballot and I thought it was, I genuinely in my heart of heart thought it was a fucking guy. Well,

Lil Wayne is voting for Trump. Well, I mean, what can you do? You know, he sees the future. Lil Wayne, Kanye,

I'm kind of sick of people telling me Kanye's a misunderstood genius, though. I listen to about... I like his music, though. You don't like his music? His music's great. He's great, but he's not a great lyricist. I mean, he's got some good songs, but so does fucking T.I. I mean, I'm going to vote for T.I. for fucking Secretary of Defense?

It's what it is. I mean, enough's enough. It's what it is. Enough's enough. He's a creative guy. He makes some songs. Leave it at that. On July 6, 2020, the Supreme Court unanimously held that states may punish or replace presidential it is he's a creative guy makes some songs leave it at that on july 6 2020 the supreme court

unanimously unanimously held that states may punish or replace presidential electors who refuse to cast their ballots for the candidate chosen by the voters of their state so now it's actually is a supreme court issue uh it's it's it's a legal thing where they have to vote so but but again you're still voting for the electoral candidate to vote for the president you're not directly voting for the president which which that you know i think if more people knew that they would be less inclined to vote they'd be like wait so i'm just voting for some dickhead but you know but it just gives the smaller states more say because they get you know it just they get a couple electoral votes

and that means more than their population but a key three is more important than like how many people live in north dakota 100 but it is true it is true like a state like california and new york california has 55 electoral votes new york has 29 electoral votes that because majority of their because a high a high a lot of black people live there they have less electoral votes than all white states based off the population that is that is the thing that's rooted in racism and slavery from the early 1800s. That is true and still remains true to that day. So the electoral college's votes, if you don't want to change it, you do need to update it because there isn't a reason why certain states should have the number of electoral votes they have. It is a bit steeped in racism from back in the day. And that's gross. I mean, it's changed that. Yes.

Yeah. But there is an argument to be made that it keeps the country. It's very difficult to have a country the size of the United States. It didn't work in the USSR. So there is an argument to be made that a system like the Electoral College does have some merit in having people keep their different cultures their different laws right staying unified right because look man not everyone's going to disagree and i mean you know you go from one neighborhood to the next people have different beliefs and people just need need to accept that yes i hate this fascist tendency

that we all have where if like someone thinks different than you or votes different than you or believes that, you know, a different thing politically that they're bad, they're immoral or evil. You know, barring a few major issues like, you know, people should have equality of opportunity and we should take care of old, you know, certain things. It's all based on interest and opinion. You know, it's like there's no objective truth, babe. It's like, look, dude, baby, we all start our lives. You just, a little bit of your real hair is popping through, and it's making me lose my belief in the character. Okay, cool.

So if you could just get it, tuck it all back in, I appreciate it. There we go. There we go. Now, because for a second there, I felt like I was talking to the doctor and fucking, you know, back to the future. Babe-aroni, listen to me. This, we're all like pinball machines. We're like cosmic pinball machines.

When our lives start, that pinball goes, and it goes and hits different things, different moments, different people you meet, different words you hear, different inflections of people's voices. If you're holding a warm cup when you're talking to someone, if you're holding a cold cup when you're talking to someone with profound moments in your life, all these things play a part in making you, you. So when you don't agree with me because I think differently than you, if you really cared about democracy and freedom and equality, then you would just accept and agree to disagree with me because you would know that you and I are just cosmically different for reasons way beyond our control. But when you turn around and tell me that you are not going to be my friend anymore or you want to disown me from your family because I didn't vote for the guy you did, you, my friend, are being a hypocrite and you're actually voting against your interests and you need to understand that we're all cosmic pinball machines and there's no rhyme or reason why we are

who we are. You don't have to be my friend. You don't have to like me. But for you being my countryman or woman telling me that you think I'm a disgusting person for who I voted for is very un-American and it's the thing. You will never get the person you want in that way. You're always going to be upset.

So that's all I have to say about that. Vote for your candidate. Don't vote against the other person's candidate. And just be thankful that you're living in a country where people can disagree. Because I'll tell you what, in Nazi Germany or China or communist China or a couple of other, the former USSR, you couldn't disagree. Yeah. So if everyone agrees with you, that's a problem. That's a problem.

And that's fascism, communism. And that's not what we want. That's a utopian idea that ends with us drinking the blood of children. We don't want that. We don't want that. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Where can people see? You've got some stand-up dates coming up.

I've got some dates. GiannisPappasComedy.com. Just go check it out. Tampa, I believe, if it doesn't get shut down. Florida probably won't get shut down. It's all about whether I'm going to show up because it could just be fucking roasting on fire with corona it's what it is cuz and for me uh of course history hyenas.com for all our merchant dates chrisdcomedy.com november 19th to the 21st punchline philadelphia um go get the tickets the shows are almost sold out punchline philly um and then we start up again in january

we got uh boston and kansas city and all these places. But November 19th to the 21st, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Punchline Philly. Get the tickets, christycomedy.com. And yeah, I mean, look, patreon.com slash bayridgeboys. We always read out the newest members of the matriarchy. We encourage you guys to have funny names that we like to laugh at, and we give them the PPW, the pseudo-penis of the week. So tell your friends, Venetia's phone locked. So what do I put in?

There it is. You got to change it now it's yeah now you got to change it yeah we just can we can so wait so we're going up to we start start here with female hill start with female hill okay leading off female hill like jamel hill that's funny wait wait that that's on that's immediately on the list female hill nice female on the list. Okay, and by the way, just a little caveat here. We're going to read as many names as we can until we realize it is the wrong list, and Venetia fucked up. So we're just going to keep going

until we realize that we did this list already, and then we'll eventually catch up, but it's just going to take a few of us reading half of it to realize that we did this already. There we go. Justin Kneif, Angel Benavidez, Ann Elizabeth. take a few of us reading half of it to realize that we did this already there we go justin knife angel benavidez and elizabeth then we got daniel caldara aka three dollar bill de blasio because i like getting pegged by strong black women at the bellagio i feel like we did this

one no you sure okay we had three dollar bill de blasio but that was usually i would but that was such a good long long... So that's on the list? He's on the list. Then we got Mark Queensner. Then we got $3 Chicken Finger, My Fumes Don't Linger Cause I'm White. On the list. Thomas Henderson, Brandon Hutchinson. Then we got Justin Flickin' My Ding Till

It Spits. Slaughter. We did have this list already. This was Shane's list right excuse me we gotta get this right what's going on yeah

yeah Debo's watermelon is gonna come seed you in a different way on cue we had this list well I'm sorry I missed that one. Deebo, that's a funny one.

Deebo's Watermelon is going to come seed you in a different way. Just go to 230? Okay, and just make a mark because some of these we probably may not have done. All right, here we go. Johnny Blake, Noah Perez, Joel Yoder, Kyle Dolan, Optimist Toot, Jonathan DePue, Randy Shannon, Revival Fitness, Marquino13. Then we got Logan Schroener. Then we got Fully Charged Cuzzy Wuzzy, who's banging a trans muzzy. That's a Drexler.

Then we got Masturbator Ginsberg. Then we got Isaiah Congdon, Connor. Then we got Chrissy D. Still got Father Bill Smegma on his uvula. Smegma? Then we got If OBJ Needs a Cleveland Steamer, callix the beaner uh just a rhyme scheme there all right then we got ben jewish cuz he was he want to lick a muzzy fuzzy free palestine 2020 drex drex okay then we got steven trainer then we got first i moved the vegetables then i moved my monkey that's a good solid chicken figure for Drexler.

Then we got Noah Heath. Then we got Chrissy Wants Pizza and Coffee Leroy. Then we got Ravioli Ravioli. Chrissy D. cracked me open and stuffed me like a cannoli. Okay. Alex Jenkins, Alexander Roselle, Catherine Skelton, Jeffrey Trenholm, Matthew Toomey, The Zesty Fro, Matthew Garlick. Then we got Lynchie Gevingen, Kyle Dave Pollock, Alex Critchton,

Jordan Bookum, Fumaris Donemeyer, Claudia Bisrecca. That's an old one. That's an old one. Yeah, some of you probably didn't hear it. Then we got Make No Mistake. I'm heading straight to the back. Then we got Danny Matzabals, a.k.a. James Altucher. Botched my circumcision.

It was a tough decision, But now I'm 20-20 With my brown eyed vision I mean that's An obvious list Then we got David Lenhart Stefan Wallerman Tom Seraldi

Then we got Dan Smalldick But enough balls To choke a horse Hoffman Put him on the list List Then we got

Alex Horton Preston Then we got Annie Junjong Shin Yanni It's Negin Pronounced when or I'll come see you in a different way, cuz. Okay. Okay.

Good try. Good try. Thank you, Annie. Yeah, thank you, Annie. Then we got Daniel Feely, Jordan. Here for the content, straighten your ass. Just pure funny points get to Drex. Okay.

Then we got Art, Ryan Wallace, Aaron Lentini, Roland Hernandez, Josh Brisbane, Fumbaka. Fumbaka. Like, on the list. Yeah. Yeah, Fumbaka.

Fumbaka. Fumbaka. Fumbaka. Fumbaka. Then we got Brad Ziegler, Gonzi Supreme, Oliver. Then we got Yanni's favorite goat.

Drexler. Then we got Sarah G. that buried her sister in Poughkeepsie. It's what it is, cuz. Then we got Dom, the emotionally gay but physically straight sauce monkey. Then we got...

Two Drexlers in a row, also the Poughkeepsie. Then we got Gabriel, I'll be your weather... Gabrielle, I'll be your weather girl. P.S. I vote to the right. That's an offer.

Andrew Top Hat. Ryan. Then we got Fumara Harris, which we've had already. We had that one. Yeah, but people don't hear him. Then we got Giuliano.

Giuliano, I don't want the Gabagool unless I could smell the fumes, Camiso. Drexler for the funny. Then we got

Timmy P, Jake Belay, Obi, John Wiggins, Travis Hogg, Ryan J. Jansen, Carrie Whitting, Tom Inman. Then we got Timmy P., Jake Bolle, Obie, John Wiggins, Travis Hogg, Ryan J. Jansen, Carrie Whitting, Tom Inman. Then we got Raph, $3 Bill DiBosio, Wagner. Then we got Raphael, step on my toes while you pinch my nipples, Tridivic.

That's on the list. The funny's over the top there. Yeah. Then we got Jeremy Couch, and then finally we got straight to the back of the uvula. So weak list this time. We had a relatively weak list. It was kind of a, you know. Well, it was a lot of just normal people.

Yeah, there was a lot of normal people and no overwhelming bangers, but we do have a little bit of a photo finish here. V, can you read back the three that we put on the list or four, what it was? Yeah, what were they? What did we say? So we said Yanni's favorite goat, right, is one or no? No, that was a Drexler. Okay, so Raphael step on my toes while you pinch my nipples, Tridivic.

I think that's going to win. Because we had so many few puns or whatever. Then we got Dan's small dick but enough balls to choke a horse Hoffman. That's another good one. Danny Matza Balls, a.k.a. JL Tuchel, brought to my circumcision. It was a tough decision, but now I'm 20-20 with my brown-eyed vision. I think that's the winner for me. Okay.

All right. So that who wins? Tuchel wins. Yeah, I think it's the winner. So congratulations. Congrats. Congrats to you. Just please stay calm and stay safe.

Yes. The country will continue no matter who wins. The president doesn't have as much power as you think. We have a Senate. It's checks and balances. Unfortunately, you did lose the Supreme Court. So that also. That's not going to change even if Biden wins.

Yeah, that's not going to change. That's a rough one. You blame that on Ruth Bader. She had to die. Yeah, she had. You know what? And it's like a lot of people, you know, I hate to throw a fact, one of these inconvenient truths in here, but Ruth Bader Ginsburg could have very well retired when she had her 20th health scare well into her 80s under Obama

and really secured that that appointment was made by Obama, and she refused to do it. So, I mean, that's kind of a complicated Yas Queen, isn't it? It's a complicated Yas Queen. It's a complicated Yas Queen. It's a complicated Yas Queen. So things happen. What can you do? Either way, the sun will come out tomorrow.

Unless Biden wins. Unless Biden wins. Yeah, unless Biden wins and we're all in camps. But that's it. But if you do what's right, then the sun will come out tomorrow. If you don't do what's right, then yeah, hopefully you can get some pillows and things that you need that you're going to take because you will be taken by the Chinese and put into camps.

And listen, go join our channel. Our channel is where so much additional content is. Go binge it. Become a part of that community. I want to give a shout out right now to the queen of the matriarchy who comes through every single year with a history hyenas themed costume. Last year she was a hyena. And make no mistake, she's a piece.

Yeah. Yeah, she's just a, and congratulations on your marriage. Lisa Johnson, the most creative, hilarious costume. She went as my tweets. She went as your tweets. And Lisa Johnson, thank you so much. You queen of the matriarchy, as Yanni said. Thank you so much. You went as Yanni my tweets. She went as your tweets. And Lisa Johnson, thank you so much. You queen of the matriarchy, as Yanni said. Thank you so much.

You went as Yanni's tweets. It was a hilarious costume. We appreciate the love so much. And make no mistake, Lisa Johnson, you got a shout out before Yanni's wife did for giving him a baby. So that's how much you are the winner. It's true. This is the first episode back. I'm a dad.

Congratulations to my wife for my baby. I love my baby as well. But Lisa Johnson, we love the fans. And listen, you're the queen is the first episode back. I'm a dad. Congratulations to my wife for my baby. I love my baby as well. But Lisa Johnson, we love the fans. And listen, you're the queen of the matriarchy. Richie G's the king of the matriarchy. And I don't know what your husband does, but he definitely doesn't have as much money as Richie G. So maybe we could go on that third or fourth marriage with Richie G.

It's what it is. Because I think Lisa Johnson might have had a marriage before this one. Might have had a marriage before this one. Might have had a marriage before this one. And Lisa Johnson, hurry up and try to divorce your husband quick and marry Richie G. Or Venetia is going to get him first. Yeah. But Venetia, I don't think, he just doesn't vote the way Venetia wants. Yeah, he doesn't want.

There's no way that a kid living in the top of a fucking condo in Kansas City votes to the left. It's just not possible. Yeah, because the truth is you don't get that kind of money and power and success if you go to the left. You've got to go to the right for that. We love you. We'll see you next time. Bye.