History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 194. Jared Fried is WILD!

Episode Date: March 17, 2021

THIS IS A THROWBACK TO JUNE 2019! AS YOU KNOW we have this on our YouTube but not on our AUDIO LIBRARY. As we are coming to an end we are wrapping up our F&B PRODUCTION! ENJOY BABES! Jared Fried joins the boys! U Up podcast co-host is a cute kid! Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

train baby What's up everybody? Welcome to another episode of the History Hyenas. I'm Chris DiStefano, aka Chrissy Hitler. With me as always, Janis Papas, aka Freddy Fettichis. For the first time ever, we have my very good friend one of my closest friends I'd say it's right Jared Fried aka the J train, so I brought my Where's mine yeah, you don't get my honor I feel honored. Yeah, I'm happy Chrissy Hitler I'm pumped. He started with Chrissy Hitler and what the fuck are you doing over there?

Where the yarmulke the most non-Jewish I've ever seen. You wear it to the side like it's a... Yeah, well, I'm wearing it like fucking... You're wearing it very Italian-y. Yeah, there we go. For JTrain, everybody, hello. You're wearing it in the way where you would go like over and over again. You'd be like, it keeps coming off my head.

I don't get how you do this. It's like I'm an undercover Nazi, like I swear I'm Jewish. Yeah, we would know. You'd be..., it keeps coming off my head. I don't get how you do this. It's like I'm an undercover Nazi. Like, I swear I'm Jewish. Yeah, we would know. You'd be, just come this way. You would be, we'd pluck you out. We'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, no. This guy, this guy's got debt. I can smell it on him.

Moisha, my name is Joshua. Where do the other Jews hang out? Thank you for fucking coming on the Potty Waddy. I solve possible. Thank you for coming on the Potty Waddy. Thank you for coming on the Potty Waddy because you're a fucking sellout act, like you're just crushing it so it's like we're fucking little pieces of garbage. That's what I said to myself. I said I can't believe I'm doing this garbage podcast.

Yeah. Can we just take one second to clear the Chrissy Hitler please? Wei Shengxian. Thank you. Now I can continue. Wei Shengxian was just Chrissy Hitler, please. I'm way song. She ain't thank you. No, I thank you We should she always just kidding. Yeah. Yeah, just kidding JK. We always just do it Well cuz Jared's a close friend of mine. Yeah, we always joke around. I knew it was a joke. Yeah, I know So yeah, man kosher appreciate you coming now, let me let let's just be honest first of all you're wearing a Why do you know Massachusetts right? Massachusetts? master you know that you look banged up you're hungover let's know what's going on

man could you drink you know I didn't drink last night I I didn't I even did another podcast today where they were like they pulled out fucking whiskey at 11 a.m. I was like there's no fucking way it's Monday what I like about you now J train is First of all you kind of have a life and career that I want to sense you're doing great You're selling out tickets wherever you go you're doing exactly what you want to do and you have a girlfriend So you're not single and just cuz my dirty dick is just it. I'm still living are you fucking I'm fucking but I People think that like I get around or I got around I'm like no I was pretty I was pretty you know I wasn't really like on the on the prowl women love Jared

You have You have it's a little bit of a Your sex there's no question no question're sex addict there you will you know? There will be the girls are hot I've said this before you to other people and I think I've said this I've made I probably said it to you. I wouldn't I would not say it to trains a good friend I If you lined up all the chicks Chris is fucked you would be like these people have nothing in common whatsoever It would be every flavor you'd be like how you'd be every flavor. You'd be like, how? You'd be at the place, you'd be like, that's a sweet and that's a savory. And those don't

even go together. How do they go together? That woman has one leg. Yeah. How did that? But I respect that. Like I like that about you. Yeah. I'm not, I'm not particular. I don't have a type. I just, I enjoy people. You would be funny. There's some people that aren't fun to play the would you bang game with? But I am one of them. And you're fun because you would you'd break it down some people you go Would you bet and then they go oh come on what? You know they get judgy like how could you even like you're being mean? Right. And then there's some people you bring it You if I brought up like would you bet you'd be like so it'd be like a Tuesday

Like we would go through. The only times I can't bang a girl out is Tuesday nights because I have my baby. That's right. That's it. You'll still find a way, you could find a way. I could find a way, I could get, I could get. I've seen you squeezing in between picking up the baby

and you know, yeah. Well I could, an afternoon bang or a morning bang. You got a minute and a half. But I have to stop, I've very much slowed it down. Very, very much slowed it down. Really? Do you have it on your mind or you? Because I think the energy, first of all, I kept kept getting sick like sore throats and stuff cuz I'm like just keep making

Out like deep kissing all these different girls. It is sucking the sore throat out. Yeah, it's just sucking the sore throat It's also like it's it doesn't feel good anymore in the sense that like it's all I'm using a condom with everyone So it's like it's one of those things where it's like whether I bang a girl who's like a 15 like fucking Latino supermodel or like just a girl who I've consistently have sex with it just it doesn't do that anymore the stress of fucking is really not yeah good as fuck I'm like holding the condom down I'm like is everything okay I just don't want to do it anymore yeah I want to do it I did about tracking Instagram posts from like nine months later. You're like are they drinking? I'm saying all this and I had unprotected sex Saturday and then I did to the woman yesterday

So I'm saying all this you're an addict. This is the first step is admitting it and I had a meeting with the girl I know I you went through this whole condom thing. I went on Nikki. I went on Nikki Glaser show this morning. I've never heard of it What's it called? Oh you up? Do you have a show called you? What um what so you are yeah, I never thought of that. Yeah, so didn't she yeah Every yeah, yeah, and I said I hadn't had sex in eight weeks Which is a lie I because it's three minutes ago. You what wasn't a lie in the sense that it was more like I just don't count sex with a condom as sex.

It just is like if I see that is that's addictive. That's that's an addiction. Yes. Rationalization. Yeah, of course. That's a guy who gets a lot of pus. Yeah. Explanation.

Yeah, that's true, too. I mean, we bring up their Instagrams. Let's see what these are. Well, with the camera, I'll get in trouble. Oh, there's a camera? I want to see. Of course. I send you shit. No, no, no. But you do have taste. I will say, I want to go back on something. If you lined them up, I wouldn't be surprised with any girl you fucked, but then there's one type I know is the type.

Yeah. That is above all else. Yeah. Tattoo on the tit. Yeah. That is above all else. Yeah, tattoo on the tit. Yeah. And filtered Instagram. But hot. Sure, hot. And sometimes I'll see girls in the wild,

out in the street, I'll go, that's a Chrissy D bitch. Like I'll know, like that's one that he would. That's a C.D.B. Chrissy D bitch. She doesn't have shoes on, she's got jeans shorts, the buttons not closed. But I think, yeah, she's got. She's got a little fat roll hanging out under the shirt.

She has a baby. Yeah. That's a Chrissy D. Chrissy will bang shirt. She has a baby. That's a Chrissy Deacon. Chrissy will bang that. She has a baby's bottle for a future baby. She's actively six months pregnant. Yeah, she's got one flip-flop. You, and I asked you this before, but I would talk about it more like I felt like it's maybe coincidental, but I think there is some correlation about when you now, now that you're in a relationship

and you're not focused, because again, you got a ton of girls that would at least throw themselves at you, whether you're active or not, that takes energy to check these DMs and messages, which is just not a part of your life anymore. I feel like you've given yourself more time to focus on your career and it's paying huge dividends. Yeah, well, I don't know if it's, you know,

if those are directly related, but I do think that there is, you know, it's like when you stop drinking, you ever take like a week off a drink, you're like, Oh my God, all this time. Yeah. You know, like I'm waking up and I'm like, I don't know, I should have more to do. You start getting stressed that you're not doing enough. Right. It's kind of like that with girls too, where you're like, Oh, I have to now I have like,

there's no avoiding writing like there's no avoiding Writing or there's no avoiding running the post or whatever it is So I think that's what it it's more that that you're just like, okay If I don't do I can either do nothing or work You know like it looks like I think that's a bigger part drinking I notice it with that if I don't drink I'm like flush with time But are you a kind of guy you have to drink every day? No, but you drink when you go when you drink you drink. Yeah when I drink I drink you party hard Yeah, but it's not like I went to a wedding Saturday

And I and it those of for whatever reason I was drinking like orange vodka on the rocks right with a lime And they were going down and I probably had 13 of those Wow the course of the night Have you ever been trying to stick to your diet? It felt good. Yeah at the end. I woke up fine 13 That's a high number. I woke up. Yeah spry Yeah, dude the time the last time I had 12 vodka sodas I I woke up the next morning and had sex with a lesbian chef, and I don't remember it a lesbian chef I've told you about this. I never told you the story. I know name on the potty, but I'll tell you after but yeah, it's famous lesbian chef banged her out

I know and cleaned her out. She made chocolate chip pancakes the next I heard this story And I could I threw up all over a floor after the pancakes no before I couldn't eat them So that's an insult. It's huge. Oh, but and you know That's a girl coming to your show and going, Hey, I didn't really laugh. Yeah. Have you guys ever decided to go toot for drink when you go out? When you guys go out, you know, guys go drink for drink. You ever go to for drink? What do you mean? Like if he has 13, you have 13 toots. 13 toots. Yeah. Yeah. No, we should though. Well, he's a single, he's a, he's a guy in a relationship now, which, which doesn't take me out of the

drink. I could drink. I used to do that with my grandma. Because you're a guy that works out a lot and you look good. But do you look good? Do you feel good? You look good. I feel okay. I'm trying to get back into it. Barry's a boot camp kid. No, I've been going, I go, now I'm going to like a gym in Harlem where it, like the things people, the things that are going on in the gyms in Harlem are crazy. Like what do you mean? Like while they're just up scaffolding?

The whole, yeah, just I go to one. Please. Yeah. He's not even paid attention. Way song. She, I go to one street light and we all switch off. Are you ever trying to like get back in the gym and you're working out and you're really like dieting and sticking your diet and then you fall off the rails because your manager posted a picture of the bread he just baked. That's what takes me out of it. And then you fall off the rails because your manager posted a picture of the bread. He just baked it Jim Serpico one of the best I'd love to have like an I should have fucking had an Eastern brunch by Jim Serpico's house All right, we should have gotten some of that bread. I I know the like the weight section smells like weed right?

Like you're working out at the gym in Harlem I like well, I like it. I think I need to like you know I think with health and fitness. It's all personal You know so it's all like you know someone's like you got to do this you got to do that And you're like no I need to do what I can do what I can do every day You know there's always those people like well. You're doing that you're like yeah This is how I have worked out my life. For the first time in about four years, I can fit relatively comfortably into size 36 waist pants and lost upwards of 20 pounds from boxing. I just enjoy boxing.

But you're enjoying it. I'm enjoying it. Like today I boxed, like rang my shirt out with sweat and felt like I worked out hard, but wasn't like dreading it. I was like, I loved it. People always are like, well, yo, how many days a week you go? And it's like, it's not hard to go if you're doing something that doesn't really fit. Like we don't have to go and have one day a week where we like kill ourselves. No, it's not.

It can be, you know, you go to spa and now you're there every day because you're enjoying it. I mean, I look forward to it. Like I'm wearing like, I went out and bought boxing sneakers I've like you're in I know the link I'm wearing a boxing sweatshirt. I'm always wearing boxing stuff I love it. Am I a boxer and a good boxer? No, but it's for me Like I now if you would have said six months ago I was 242 if I was like, oh I could be 200 pounds by summer I bet that's not gonna happen and now I'm like 220

It's like I can feasibly lose another better. Is it like is one motivating the other everything? That's it That's the big thing one motivates the other if you get one on track the other shit flows cuz you're like well I don't want to waste the thing. I like doing yeah like tomorrow I'm not gonna have time to do boxing. I've sleep on my mother's house because the baby's over there So like I'm not gonna have time to do any exercise, but I will wake up and do push-ups, sit-ups, I'll shadow box in the basement, I'll do something to get the sweat going and keep it going, whereas if I wasn't working out,

I would never just get up and do that, because like, ugh, the ball is rolling now. Yeah, you want the ball. You know what I mean? That's, my brother and I used to, when we lived together. Harry. Yeah, Harry, we'd do this thing where we'd be like,

we'd wake up hungover and hungover like is it a wash It's a wash. Yeah, we just like be fucking pieces of shit the whole yeah, it's just like it's easy Yeah, like what like we have on the podcast that we have like a vitamin company sponsor And I'm like always I always say I'm like, you know If you take a vitamin in the morning, you know You're that much more likely to be healthy during the day like it's just gonna like it influences everything once you when it rains it pours Did your father have a heart attack this weekend or because he has he's had like 36 Two

Early on too, so was he doing coals you in his first one? He this first one was 40 survive survive them though Still a smoker or no, no drinker drink eight,? Drink, ate, you know, like me. So you know, like, well how's your blood pressure, how's your cholesterol? We talked about that on there. I'd love to take your BP. Let's do it. Okay. And I'll do, you should get your blood. He's not anxious. I don't even know. He's doing it. The thing is with all these numbers things, like I'm like a big, like, I'll nod my head just cuz I'm like I don't care to deal with it Like you know like with the numbers on blood pressure cholesterol just be like oh cool Yeah, like I don't know like it's like like you're from Brooklyn like Queens actually Queen's borderline

Yeah, okay I people name areas in Brooklyn's and Queens and I literally don't know or care and he takes advantage of that I have no and I go I Like when people like oh, I live in like playside manner. I'm like okay cool Whatever that says whatever that whatever that is train, and I started we started we told him you were from Long Island Do it open mic together. Yeah, well no train when he first started He was like you know like that like waspy like frat boy guy that like people were like who's this guy fuck this guy I was like I like Jared. I was friends with you from day one sure we will remember sitting up I remember eating bagels and yeah well I asked for advice I was like I don't

understand the thing is I don't really care I I never thought of like comedy for a certain group and not for another group right and it kind of I felt that right away where I was like this is kind of crazy that like I was like going into like the creek being like hey, what's up? Nice to meet you thinking like I'm doing that. You know I like yeah in comedy The thing is with you is you're a good-looking guy. You're a successful guy You a lot of comedians. They don't like to see that well This is an open mind with the same open mic as you but I always would go like I remember in my mind I'd see someone on stage doing something weird. I'd be like, oh, that's a weirdo

Yeah, it's gonna be funny for weirdos. I'd be like good. Yeah, I could see I see the play Yeah, like and there was never I don't think there's ever the same amount of You're like thought given to me right like I in the beginning I you know where we would go always doing stuff for this type of audience. And right. Right. Right. You know what I mean? Like, no one would look at me and go, Oh, that's like, there's an audience out there for that. I would look at like somebody who was like, you know, we'll go up and talk about it. They can never get on a date. They get, you know, they're on this loser or whatever.

And I go, Oh, I get it. Like, Oh, that's funny. Like I, I would never like look at someone and be like, well, they're like, I, it's kind of like this, like, you know, I don't want to call it racism, but it would be like, you know, there was this thought of like, well, nothing you could say could ever be funny to me. And I'm like, no, I, you're the most different. I would see people different from me. And this is the most differentiated group of people I've ever been around. Sure.

So I was always like, Oh, that's for this and I could see that. And I've seen someone who looked like that in the past and I could see it. I don't think that's ever given was really given back. And now like, you know, the people that come out to my shows, I'm like, yeah, those exactly the people I was always talking to. Well yeah, you were screwed in for years with this. And I remember you talking about it and we talked about all the time. You were like I you always post you were always posting you always had like alarms to post on your social media I'm like that consistency

Has created fucking real ticket sales now doing the columns every Thursday I did it on my own like I would do I would write an article every Thursday And it was like my own thing wasn't like anyone was paying me to do that so every every Thursday someone was like, if like there's people that will be like, I've been reading your stuff since high school. And I'm like, that's crazy to me. I don't know they exist adults working, right? You know, and you're like, you're high school. And then, you know, it was, um, but every Thursday put something out and just have something to like, able to shill to me I was like oh if I meet with someone who's like oh we're looking for writers I'd be like well here's three years of writing yeah like I but I I kind of deliberate you

were deliberate yeah very smart you know and that's why you fucking you know the guys who have this on the successful absolutely I don't know I don't know if it all relates but it kept me it kept me you know move doing stuff like someone asked me for it he was two years in he was asking me for advice and I was like I don't know man every time go fucking yeah he's like I'm two years what's next I'm like doing the same thing you've been doing you know like he yeah like I don't know what people hit me up when people look at that kid Lev now. That kid is like, he's been doing it like two years. Yeah, he's got a successful sex podcast.

And he's sold out already, Caroline's. So, nowadays, I think realistically, you could do it one, two years, and make it with something other than standup, and then cash in live through a standup. Not talking about, you know, because I don't really know him too well, but like, all those people, which is great,

and it's not, but it's like there's some of that stuff that is, no matter which way you slice it, just flash in the pan stuff, like their podcast is good now and this and now. What you've done is you've created things from all different angles. You have stand-up, you have your podcast, you have your Snapchat show, you have your bachelor's show,

you have all these things where it's like if one falls, you're still good to go. Diversified, I like that. Diversified. That's what a good investor does. Listen, let's be honest, that's what a successful white guy does. Diversify the portfolio, let's say you're from Massachusetts,

from an elite family, just know what's going on, you're successful. Elite family, yes. I don't know, I think everyone's an elite family to you who doesn't grow up in Ridgewood, Queens. Yeah, it's just what it is. We didn't have a stoop. You didn't have a relative who had a tattoo on your tit.

Yeah. So he's elite. No, I get it. Yeah, you didn't have a stoop. Yeah, that's funny. Jared doesn't come from a place that has stoops. No, there's no stoop. They have porches.

Yeah, the only stoop I knew was Sesame Street. Yeah. And did you know that, I was told this fact the other day, that the Sesame Street characters all have like backstories No, and in 2004 cookie monster Dropped that he was before he had cookies his name was just Phil Really, and he was like and then he ate a cookie and then became the monster that you see now

I didn't know how fucking hilarious yeah who was big bird what was Big Bird's name I'm Tommy Tommy like just like you know just a tall guy yeah Bert and Ernie in a gay relationship you know just fucking you know just out of the clubs met each other yeah like I just have a Phil Phil it's that you always remember that Cookie Monster they were created by adults so they all have some like even the tickickle Me Elmo guy, like that guy ended up being in a relationship with like young girls, right, or boys?

Wait, what? The Tickle, yeah, it was young boys, yeah. Shout out Paulie Gass, my boxing instructor from Bettsonhurst, Brooklyn, used to sell Tickle Me Elmos out of his trunk for a half price for kids. Yeah, he got in trouble. Wait a minute, the guy who created Tickle Me Elmo? Yeah, the voice the voice plays

But he created the pup. I mean that was his character Dude, I I think like, you know, you I think money makes people just go crazy I think so too a little bit like I think money time and money you I mean you see with all those lottery winners They all go down. Yeah, so it's like's like, if you don't have a gradual, you're talking about people having a couple years where they get to sell out and whatever, it's like, if you don't have a gradual thing, you get fucked, your mind is gone.

You don't even know how to relate. Or if it happens young, I think you're doomed. Yeah, I don't think there's any way around it Yeah, it happens to you. That's why I always think of like the NBA players NBA players are all child stars Yeah, they were the most famous in their own town Yeah, and then they were the most famous on their own a you team Then they were the best at like, you know at their college and then they get to the NBA and it's like if you're the seventh Man on the bench

how fucked up are you yeah like you're you're looking at LeBron James being like he's that much better than me yeah right and I was the best ever in my high school AAU and college oh yeah probably the best in that town's history history yeah history anybody who's played in the NBA or any professional. That's a mind fuck I don't care if you see them in high school whatever whatever sport it is if you see those people in high school It's the best person you've like it's almost emotional Yeah, how good they were to watch live and then they may or may not be stars in the NBA or what NHL

They could easily sit on the bench. That's it. That's that's gotta feel like shit It's nuts think about it. You're sitting on the bench and you're like, but I'm me. Yeah. Yeah, I've grown up in heaven My whole life and I've had this yeah No one feels bad for them because they have a ton of dough But that's so that that's why sports psychology is a big thing now cuz it's like you have to talk to these guys about All that how do you, what's going on? Yeah, I can understand that. Because a lot of them are 21, 22 year old kids too.

They have fucking suicide risks. You know, they're millennial fucks. It's the same shit. Nah, basketball players don't really, that's rare. That one guy, Brian, remember him from the bowl? He played his last. Oh yeah, didn't he drown himself or something like that? Yeah, he killed himself, but it's rare.

Football you'll find it a lot. Football you'll find. Well that's because of the CTE. Comedy you'll find a few of rare. Football you'll find it a lot. Football you'll find. Well that's because of the CTE. Comedy you'll find a few of those. Comedy you'll find it a lot. Not in basketball. Comedy, your ego, especially like, we talked about this last week,

I go on the road sometimes with Sal Vulcano, and then it's like, you know, every day I walk around, I don't get mobbed, not by any means, but I get noticed, you know, whatever. When you're with Sal, it's like you're pushed to the side. I can't I would probably fuck out. I probably Friday Saturday Sunday was with him two weeks So I probably took like people just running up to him. Give me the phone Yeah about 40 pictures of sal and his fans, so it's like you have to just be like I'm okay with that Yeah, why wouldn't you be yeah? have to. I mean, also you understand,

I guess that's the way to look at LeBron versus the next guy. Yeah. Like I, you know, I would look at Sal, I'd go, yeah, he's on TV every minute of every day. Yeah. Like how could, you know, like. It's wild that they have, their show is 51%

of the viewership on the entire network. That's what it is? That's what it is. His show was kind of like the last TV show that they, you know, it was like that VH1 Best Week Ever, which aren't so much, you can't even avoid that show. Why wouldn't they just find groups of friends and have them do the same show otherwise?

I don't know. Like, wouldn't you just be like, okay, it works, let's just keep, let's be the channel. Let's be the Joker's channel. Well, here's the, that's a funny, that's an interesting thing you said. We know, who told me that? It was a definite inside information. That was true It was like they hate the Joker's they hate true TVs in that they trying to be cool

And we want to do that kind of Williamsburg thing or we want to do that Yeah, we want to do the weird comedy want to do the diverse comedy So they don't work. They hate the Joker's fan base. They hate that. They hate that. They hate normal nice people. I've met them. You see them at shows and they're like the nicest.

Exactly. They hate the hand that feeds them. It's the only thing on that fucking network that works. It's the only thing that keeps the network afloat. Wow, that's another thing with like, you know, I had heard some inside info, like another station that has a certain cartoon show that will go. Oh yeah, don't mention it.

They don't, I don't think they're really fans of their fans either. And that cartoon show, you know, builds it up. Crush it. Yeah. For years. Yeah. It's like, and that cartoon show's fans is like, everyone's heard of it. It's almost everyone.

Yeah. Every there's this new people in charge that want like a cool they want like a Exclusive kind of cool. I get that like I get that from you say like doing all the stuff that I've done Like I've I do on my own like I Comment on the bad truck just cuz I like those things and now that there's a little tiny group of people that will follow me I'm like, all right I'm gonna just keep doing the things I like to do and hopefully they like it But no one is looking at me and I know this and I don't think this is offensive

I don't think no one's like the the thing of like our generation is you want to be interesting For knowing interesting I am NOT an interesting pull for someone to pull out of obscurity because I look a lot like The people that I'd sit across from every comedy club I go to I interesting pull for someone to pull out of obscurity because I look a lot like the people that I'd sit across from. Every comedy club I go to, I'm asked for a ticket because they think I'm going to the show. And I get that. And it's like- Even your own sold out shows.

Even my own shows. Sir, where's your ticket? I'm Jared. Oh, okay, cool. Yeah. And I get that but that's the reality of like you you know there is something cool to going this to saying well this person who looks nothing like me I get it you know I understand it so and I I can't I

can't really fight you know that's not that's not a fight to wage you know like that's not I'm not gonna change that opinion I'm not gonna change that want because the you know used to be like I think there was a time We're like maybe my parents like no, this is the job. We want money and numbers, right? and now it's like no, I want shoes that also buy shoes for someone else in the Orient and Now I am a person who gives a pair of shoes to someone because of my purchase. Right. You know? That's how every company on Shark Tank is like,

plus we have a goal of giving to this group when you make your purchase so you'll feel good about your purchase. I was like, I just never like came up with that like, you gotta feel good about the thing. No, I wanna fucking shoes. Oh yeah, all those competitions. Nobody's ever gonna. I want Nikes. They have to, all those competitions. Nobody's ever. Nobody's ever.

They have to feel bad for you. Nobody's ever going to win unless you have to be a sob story. You have to 100 percent have something awful that happened in your life. Or you have to be like, you know, inspiring. And I was like, I don't even know where this came from. I watched Undercover Boss the other day. Have you watched that show? I've seen a few episodes. Yeah.

Dude, dude every Every episode they talked to the saddest people sure ever and they're like, yeah But they and it's a CEO being like how you doing is like I lost a hundred bucks the other day So now I can't you know pay my rent. You're like Why isn't the CEO doing anything? Nothing is yeah every person they meet the CEO doing anything? Like he does nothing. Every person they meet is just in dire straits. Instead of being embarrassing, why doesn't the CEO just say, well, if a hundred bucks is paying your rent, why don't you just not quit this job and get a real fucking job?

Why don't you work harder? Well, then they do this thing at the end of every episode where the CEO gives everyone they met like 20 grand or something. And it's like, it's like a Willy Wonka treatment. Yeah. It's like, you guys won the golden ticket. And it's like, yeah, but what about the person that was also making fries with you? Yeah. Part of the reason that shows the hit is because CEOs have to prove they're human now. Because the trend is to be like, anyone who's rich

or successful or excellent at anything is evil or bad. Yeah, or awful people. So now it's like these CEOs fucking degrading themselves by putting on a fucking smock going like, hey, guess what? You know, I have red blood too. I'm a person, I'm just not an evil person making 400% of what you're making and ruining your life.

It's like, actually, you know, I'm a guy who cares about my business and I fucking worked hard for it. Here's 20 like, actually, you know, I'm a guy who cares about my business and I fucking worked hard. Here's 20 grand. Please, please just be nice. Please think I'm a nice person. I think a lot of is that I think the tree it's become, we were flirting with it for a while and now it's like full blown, uh, like way left kind of,

you just assume everyone's bad who's done good. Well, I think also we, you know, you know, people fucked it up for themselves too. You never had to see what was in someone else's backyard. If your neighbors went on vacation, you just assumed they went on the same vacation that you could afford. Talking about the Grammys. Now you're on Snapchat and Instagram. Keeping up with the Joneses. On stories and it's not, oh I'm sure they went to Florida

and they stayed at a hotel just like I would. Now it's, I'm seeing the hotel they're at, how the fuck are they afforded in that hotel when they live next door to me? Yeah, yeah. It's like, oh they must have it easier. They must have rich parents. So now I hate them.

Now I hate them. Fuck your vacation. But meanwhile, That's like oh they must have it easier. They must have rich parents. They must have hate them now I hate them. Yeah, fuck your vacation I mean, that's a big thing so we we we should have just you know, remember when there was that rich kids of Instagram show Yeah, and it's like yeah, we all watch that we're like these kids fuck these kids. Yeah, you know It wasn't like we were watching going. Oh man. I wish this could be my life We were all like no there's no way it could be our lives. But they always pick like the fucking, you know, because it's TV, so they want a trainwreck. They never pick just like normal. Most of the rich kids were just like, yeah, I'm following my father and mother's footsteps,

working real hard, getting good grades. Like Dennis Leary's son, Jack Leary, who's, you know, I'm sure I made a lot of money. Jack Leary, who I've worked with, we worked with on, I have seen on Benders. Jack Leary is like a great producer, great guy in comedy. It's just, you know, Jack, Dennis, I'm sure I made a lot of money. Jack Lear, who I've worked with, who we worked with on, I've seen on Benders, Jack Lear is like a great producer, great guy in comedy. It's just, you know, Jack, of course. And it's like Jack Lear is just a great kid that never used his father's money or like privilege or whatever,

and grew up very wealthy, and it just works his fucking ass off, but he would never make a TV show because he's just doing things the right way. Yeah, it's just, it goes both ways. Yeah. Yeah, I it's just it's it's it's goes both ways Like it's normal to look at those stories on Instagram and go fuck this guy. I call it FTG mode Yeah, like just immediate reaction visceral to go try and everyone's doing that to each other So everyone like we you know in comedy

We we have a moment of that where you see someone like it shows and they're putting up all Their stories you're like well. I I'm not booked whatever People are doing that on grander scales than we can understand like yeah Just it's that neighbor thing and I I get that like I do understand why and now that relates to everything well You must well even even like the motivational speakers I know Tim Dillon talked about but the Tony Robbins of the world the Gary Vee's all these people like post like you got To do this you got to do that It's like it makes actually it has a negative effect on certain people it makes people feel awful about their life

Sometimes a that guy's that guy's a snake oil salesman. I mean like that guy talk about you know It's that's good. This whole thing is crazy What do you you do motivational speeches with the f-word? And now I believe you more like no you're the new kid on block Tony Robbins curses like that, too Yeah, do that too. I I just I I can't and it's like that's another guy's dad owned a huge fucking liquor store Gary V and like, you know, it's always a what kind of genius Yeah, you're a genius cuz your dad had a great business that you almost fucking put into the ground. Like, it's like, it's like, you know,

there's more to that story too if you go look at it. It's all the bullshit. That's why, dude, I stay off the Instagram stuff and that's why I think it's so important in our careers to have like something else to focus on. Like, guys have relationships, girls have my kid. It's like, I don't have to get stuck in just watching what these people are doing.

I can watch fucking Pocahontas five times and not worry about it. Yeah, I was with my girlfriend last week a lot and I just noticed that like, you know, I was like, man, I kind of like looked at my Instagram numbers. Which are great by the way, jumping every day. But I looked at it. I follow every second. No kidding. It was down.

And you fucked that guy. I was like, oh, I must have been like having a good time, you know with Jess hanging out and not having to do that You know when you're on the road, that's when you post the most sure when you're alone and you have nothing I know I was posting at five o'clock in the morning when most of us are like just getting our asses to the airport You're posting a fucking 30 minutes door and it's I'm in but your Instagram and we spoke about the site You're a perfect example of your Instagram and social media of all of them, is a television network to these kids. To me it is. It's a television network.

I see it. You always have content. I see it. Hub of the wheel. And it's also like- After I've seen it on Instagram. Thank you. It's also like, everything you do.

The other thing you guys were talking about, the light reading on the last episode. Oh yeah, a little light reading white fragility Why were pieces of shit every white person has to read it? If you're gonna fit in today, you know, even though you have a diverse daughter I've all I do is volunteer my time when I have time to anybody you can't everything but I'm white So I need to read that to understand why I'm a figure it out and but you see that and it's like So I need to read that to understand why I'm a piece of shit. You gotta figure it out. But you see that and it's like, okay, let them do that.

I'm just gonna be as funny as I think I can be every post. Like, there's no post I'm putting up that isn't gonna, that I don't think is funny. So, and there's nothing serious, there's nothing ever gonna be that's like, I'm there, come for the fart factory. That's all I wanna do. I don't waste any of my energy on that no and if it and even if it is somewhat, you know, you know Device of whatever it is with the thought of someone laughing to themselves about it and our egos our egos make it that about us It's like whoever whatever comments posting their part. I read that book cuz of you. Yeah, it says

Do you guys She's not reading that being like well Chris should be reading. Yeah. Yeah, it's like who cares it doesn't know but but I think you know All these points you bring up are Good man, and fucking you know it's Passover. I know you want to talk about the birth of Jesus And I just know so little about it. I feel like I should know about my cousin What don't you know about the birth of Jesus? Tell me the story What do you mean? He's a virgin Mary that he went to Catholic school Virgin Mary Mary mother of God and her husband her carpenter Husband Joseph never had sex. They may have may or may not have said have had sex after but he was Immaculate conception. He was immaculate Jesus was now you hear that and

Everyone's just going with it. I say yes. I say I believe hear that and everyone's just going with it. I say yes. I say I believe. I have a cross tattooed on my back. It's just faith and I keep it. Faith and you... I'm a big... I like religion. I'm not like one of these like... I think I like the community of it. Like I like the yarmulke. Like I know who's on my team with their hats. Sure. I like that. But...

But nobody wears the yarmulkes, you can't tell. I'm happy that Judaism is in another language, so I don't have to come face to face with asking myself if I believe it or not. I can sing the songs and go, you know, like, you know, I can sing like, you know, like, Di-di-ay-nu, and I'm like, okay, I'm just having fun with the song. It's not like, you know, there's no song where it's like, the baby came out of nowhere, the baby came out, you know, I have to repeat that to myself. Well, the Old Testament, the more the more Jew side of the Bible, that is based more in like facts and like, you know, or like, you know, like, whatever, it's kind of be more, it's more designed to be taken like,

as like, this is truth, read the words, the New Testament, the more Catholic part, the ones that the Catholics pay attention to, I should say, it's like parables, stories, analogies to life, that's what it's supposed to be. So it's supposed to be taken like, hey, this is a story about this that happened, but the real meaning is this. So like for example, the story of Easter, Easter Sunday, God, Jesus coming back from the dead. Well, hold on. There's a big gap between Jesus is born, yeah, and then he lives how many years? He's got about 33 years he died, but there's a lot, there's the mystery years of Jesus. From the time he's like 15 to like 30, there's just nothing written about him in the New

Testament. The Gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John. That's the thing, like he, you know, it's kind of like a Macaulay Culkin. Sure. You know, you got like the first ten years, and you're like, we love this fucking kid. Well, the truth about Catholicism, and it's my religion, so I know about it, it's like, the truth is, like, most of the religion was just kind of made up at this thing called the Council of Nicaea, in 325 AD, where just Emperor Constantine, who was the emperor of the eastern part of the Roman Catholic Empire, he just Emperor Constantine, who was the emperor of the eastern part of the Roman Catholic Empire, he just basically, they made fucking whatever gospel made Jesus

look the best, which happened to be Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, there were about 30 other gospels around at the time that did not paint Jesus in that light, that did not have Mary as a virgin, but the stories that they wanted Jesus to pay in that light, they did. And then all things just started happening. Why, you know, calendar dates, why we do this, eating meat, not being able to eat meat on Fridays, not being able to eat meat on Good Friday and certain Fridays during Lent, or some devout Catholics every Friday during the year. Really what that is, is there was a bishop alive at the time that was making the rules at that council and owned a fish market. That was it. It was a money scheme. That's the truth.

That's very Jewish of your religion. Well, the similarity between Jews and Catholics, I mean we're all cut from the same cloth. Well, Jews founded Christianity. Jews founded Catholicism and Christianity. For me, I come from this, Jesus was born, then he was long hair with a beard. Right. There's no thought, I just, not until right now

did I ever think of, well, toddler Jesus, and people going, were people afraid of the toddler? No, at first he wasn't really known as the son of God. I mean, Mary was saying, I'm actually conceived this baby, and they're like, you're fucking nuts. Her husband Joseph was was a carpenter who was very old at the time they fuck after They're believed to be now. There's some scriptures that say Jesus had brothers and sisters I know he definitely had it's okay to think that Mary got Mary got fucked. Yeah hard So he got fucked and she might have might or might not have had fumes. He's going to hell for what he said

I'm gonna refrain refrain and say that Mary most likely had sexual intercourse to her married husband, which is well within the guidelines of Catholicism to do that, but Jesus was conceived immaculately. So she has a bunch of kids and one of them is like... One of them, well, she was a virgin when she got pregnant with Jesus. Tough brother to have. No, she wasn't a virgin. He wasn't the oldest.

Jesus was. No, it's Mary. Jesus was older than James No, she wasn't a virgin. He wasn't the oldest. Jesus was. Jesus was older than James? Yeah, it's Mary, mother of God, the Virgin Mary. The Virgin Mary. Yeah, but was Jesus the first of her kids? Yes. Are you sure?

Yeah, cause she was a virgin. No, no, no, no, no. He wasn't. Isis, can you just double check? James was his older brother. Mary had gotten banged out. James was his older brother from Joseph's previous marriage. No, that's not that you're just making that,

that's a Ridgewood arrangement that's doesn't do something you fucking peanut head inbred fucking guy that thinks he knows everything but actually knows nothing. Let me just tell you, if it's the virgin, virgin mother of God, what's the key word I'm saying? Virgin. Virgin. No, I heard made up.

That's the key word, made up. Yeah. Virgin. No, I heard made up. That's the key word. Made up. No. I heard fantasy. I heard allegory. James was, it wasn't Mary's child. It was Joseph's child from Priem's relationship, because I know catholics. Out of marriage?

Wait a minute. I got cheated the uvula by Father Bill. How is that something that exists and people were like negative're like negative about divorce and what do you mean? He's had this other kid in another marriage, which is okay his wife died He's a carpenter widow Widowed man is the top of the fucking charts. Yeah the bag. Yeah No one gets more chicks than a widowed guy or a guy with a puppy. I more chicks than a widowed guy or a guy with a puppy I

Gotta go widowed guy over guy with puppy. So Jesus now He's a toddler He's the baby Jesus and you guys made up that it was a baby from another Mary because you just want to keep her virgin When really she got banged out it's not true. She got banged the fuck out So so that so yeah, and then there's a lot of mystery years, but Jesus growing up It's just like your normal like where's youth soccer 15 year old happening there It's at well those are the mystery years of Jesus. He reappears when he's like in his late 20s early 30s He's just like I'm that guy. I was Now he's now he's you know turning water into wine now. He's you know turning fish. You know he's making the fish multiply

He's making bread loaves multiply. He's walking on water. Now he's like Broadway Jesus. Oh, so people are like, you gotta hear about this Jesus guy, this guy's doing some crazy shit. Well, the thing was, there were about 20 other people in Jesus' time claiming to be the Son of God. It was a common thing to say, I'm the Messiah, I'm the Messiah. Yeah, because the Jews were expecting a Savior. Exactly.

You guys are still waiting for your guys. We're waiting for your Savior. Yes, every day. Every day. Yes, every day. Jesus now, Jesus, you know, really, he talked to mostly the poor, you know, all his disciples were poor people, so there's like the speculation that like, you know, you're able to get poor people to do and believe anything you say. So he's walking around, he's getting a following, and this is when they think the Jews were like, this is, we gotta get rid of this guy. You can deny the story of Jesus, you can deny that, the immaculate, you can deny all that,

you can't deny that a man named Jesus historically lived at that time. There's enough evidence of that. Sure. He's talking about it so many times. Didn't they go get his tomb? CNN. Well, who knows where his tomb actually is, because it's like, you don't know what the guy looked like.

But if you don't believe in his story, which is fine you go to hell but but this story but he did exist Everything did exist this is already that he existed. It makes for the most part I mean, you know show me show me an eight-year-old before cell phones would walk around being like I'm the guy Yeah, yeah mental illness. It makes sense Yeah, that makes sense Jesus's hair and we get a following I could see that didn't you say that Jesus was actually a guy they based an artist description off the there is a like the pictures of Jesus Godfrey said it's some yeah some just a real person yeah they probably knows it's a godfrey fact yeah it's a godfrey fact which means it's not 100% true we're not sure yeah we're not sure do you have a 100% clean ass right now I have a 100% googled article that says

He had a brother's name James Joseph and Simon, right? So you tell me all three of those? Well, I mean, are you telling me that Joseph Mary's husband was a fucking whore? Cuz no, I'm saying that she had sex after Jesus But Jesus was the oldest and the immaculate conception and then she probably had sex with her husband after had more children They used condoms so it didn't count. Yeah, exactly. Either way she got banged out Chris but Jesus was the oldest and the immaculate conception, and then she probably had sex with her husband after he had more children. They used condoms, so it didn't count. Oh, okay. Exactly.

Either way, she got banged out, Chris. She got banged out. She got banged out legally within the confines and constructs of the Catholic religion because she was married. Yeah, but- Is everyone, was Virgin Mary hot? We don't have any pictures of her.

Unfortunately, the condom is not gonna be invented for another couple thousand years. But we have the Jesus pictures? Godfrey's on point. They say he looked Semitic, so he looked like, like darker. Okay. He was a Jew, it was a Semitic Jew. I mean Jesus was a Jew. It was like a Persian Jew. He looked like my friend Nehruzun. Pull up Nehruzun, that I guarantee is what Jesus looked like my friend, Neer Rosen. Pull up Neer Rosen. That, I guarantee you, is what Jesus looked like. Pull up Neer Rosen. My college, my old college, no, NIR. Did you make the joke? I'm right, Neer Rosen. No, it's a good one. We can hit him with it now. That's fun. That's what Jesus looked like.

Probably that. Yeah, probably something like that. Yeah, that's Jesus. Looked like ISIS. And Neer's a Jew, and he's Semitic, his father's Iranian. Yo, Neer, what is Iranian near. What is this picture? What is this from he's uh you know he's he's intense guys a journalist He will be decapitated by Isis one day at one point something he will get head cut off. Yeah I mean he goes to places that's fucking wild he will 100% be to cap lives in it lives in Lebanon. Yeah Yeah, it's just what he's Jack though show a picture how fucking jacked he is kid is Jack

Yeah, because but can but if I do Lebanon one two three, huh? Hmm. Yeah, cuz yeah, okay. I'll throw hands at him. Yeah, you're a hilarious. He hates that third button. Yeah He really lets the chest fly look at that one with the hair What was he doing with the hair and then the other one? He looks like he is captured by it What's go to the house where Jesus looked like with his hair? That's fucking what Jesus looked like and go to the bald one. It looks like he is captured by it. What's, go to the- That's what Jesus looked like with his hair like that. That's fucking what Jesus looked like. And go to the bald one, he looks like he's captured by it.

Oh, he's wearing a sports coat. All right. Yeah, that's what Jesus looked like. J-Train. Fucking, yeah, so I know there's a lot of questions about- He doesn't believe any of that shit. Well, I'm not asking with any skepticism. I do believe that during that time, there was a baby Jesus, and people and people like this is the chosen one. What did you grow up with? What were your customs traditions?

What was it? I'm a high holiday Jew. I don't go in HHJ HHJ We go to high holidays. Would you pass over I was supposed to come down to your Parents condo in Florida to celebrate some holiday with you. You'd get stopped at the gate immediately. They'd be like, the air conditioner's working fine. You can't do it. Yeah, please. Jared grew up, what town did you grow up in again? Outside of Boston called Needham.

Needham, and I drove past the house you grew up in. Nice place. And the local bagel store, what was the local bagel store? Bagel, Cafe Fresh. Cafe Fresh, Great Bagels. Great Bag. I need to be living close to Jews and Italians. And that's just why.

To feel comfy. I need bagels and I need Italian food and pizza and it's just what I need. And it's just what I need. Are you gonna do like Long Island? You gonna be in Long Island? I can't go that, I can't go that deep. You're a recently married, congratulations.

Thank you, thank you. Now are you gonna like, does she want that? She does in a lot of ways want that because she's That means she wants that. Her family says she wants it, but I'm not. Is she like Long Island in the sense that like I'm gonna move next door to my parents. Yeah. Yeah, cuz that's a Long Island Thing more that more than a religious thing. Yeah, it is. Yeah, like I'm gonna be on the same block Where grandmama and papa she wants that take care of the kids because they can walk across the yard and that's it she wants it bad but I'm

putting up as much defense as I can at this point so I'm trying how much defense as by saying it's never gonna happen and I'm going look I'm going listen to me it's never going to happen and she's going well what town on Long Island Melville nice town, she's got, you know, she's okay. She actually went to Temple. She's Greek and Italian, but she grew up with all Jews. Yeah, I don't adhere to that. There's always that one, they grew up around Jews, they go, I'm Jewish.

My mom would yell at me for dating you, so no, you're not Jewish. So let's talk real math here. But she's had a lot of Jewish friends. I'm sure, yeah, she gets what goes on. Yeah, but your parents want you to marry a Jew then. My mom is very odd. And your current girl's Jewish.

Jew. Perfect. Perfect. It works. You know, I want it, you know, like socially, like the cultural stuff, like just like, you know, like she's Greek. You guys have things in common that you without even ever meeting. Yeah. Yeah. That helps. It helps. Yeah. You just want to... Were you worried selfishly? Because I was worried about this, but then I got over it, but just asking when you got a girlfriend like it would hurt your career like to be public with that? No you know I... No. Is there a desirable guy? No you know what it is like anyone that would DM me

about like getting drinks or hooking up they wanted to like date. Right. Like it wasn't like they were like you know they weren't like... They weren't like I want to suck your cock dry. It was never like that. I want to get to know you. I want to like, let's do drinks and I'll go why? I don't know you, you know, like I you you got to see my dating profile. I don't get to see yours. The thought of like going out on these dates with these girls and having to perform after I just performed. It's exhausting. It was a lot. So like when we, when Jess and I met, I wasn't even like dating. I was like out of it.

I was like, I'm not doing it. Perfect, you came in perfect. Gonna hang, I'm not, I'm gonna get drunk and fuck it and do whatever comes my way, comes my way and it just kind of, you know, worked out. But it's, it's not, you know, the dating thing. Let's do drinks. I think like also like, you know, the Jewish thing works into that too.

Where like, a lot of women, and I don't mean to like, you know, make- Say it! To group, but they want adventures that are safe. They want safe adventures. And I think a lot of Jewish girls see me as a Jewish guy that like, checks a certain box for them as a certain type. Also doing comedy. It's like, oh, he does fun stuff, but my parents will be cool with it. Yeah. You know, so it's like sort of, sort of, sort of, but they'll, you know, like, you know,

oh, he's got it all going on. Plus his job. That's like kind of keeps things hot and fresh. So I can understand like a lot of them to them like I could when I meet them I kind of felt like they had dated like one type of guy that was just like me minus this career. I feel like your Instagram and social media is very parent friendly. There's nothing filthy on there there's nothing like nuts. No but the mom would laugh at the jokes too like I have like a lot of like you know moms that you, when I do the

bachelor commentary, girls will write to me, I'm watching this with my mom now. You're a safe Jew fantasy is what you're saying. Yeah, I have a Jew. There's a fantasy to be fulfilled. I'm not even saying like from a looks part. Yeah, right. It's just from a comfort standpoint. You're not a doctor. You're not a lawyer. Yeah Story, yeah, here's group chat girls are smuggling their phones into temple right now on group chats texting Like I want a guy like Jared free. I want to bang a guy like Jared feared and no they want to date him They want to do what a bang of Jews are the kind of some of them want to marry fucking But trust me to introduce to Jewish parents. They'd have to preface it a little bit Like he's doing really well

So and they'll go see Seinfeld and they go no, but he's doing really and they're gonna go. What do you mean? I don't see his TV show. I don't know what you're talking because no he's got an Instagram fun They go what the fuck is Instagram? Well, then like I like I know how my mom would react to me So I know what the conversation is He's hanging out with Schwartz's but my mom my mom if it wasn't me My mom would judge it Horrific. We song she ain't got it Yeah

So like if it was someone like I remember my friend when I was I was selling life insurance and shit my friend She dated this guy and she was like and he's comedian and I spent the whole dinner We were all hanging out like a bunch of friends a group dinner, making fun of this guy to no ends. Just every five minutes I was hammered, just going, just doing, um, what's the deal? Oh, he was a comedian, you weren't. Yeah, no, I was just- Was there anybody we know where he kind of just came away? I have no memory of who it was, I can't, like I just know she was like, gone on a couple dates

with a guy who's trying stand-up comedy. And I was a big dickhead And I'm just sitting there going what's the deal and the whole day dying laughing Yeah, just cuz we were fucking around about it, and I was hammered and then like you know a year later I'm you do and now it's like the last thing I ever want you to say if I'm in public with you is that I'm a comedian like you never want your girlfriend to introduce you as a comedian. I want that. If they didn't know who you were.

No, no, no, I don't want, I don't, you don't want that do you? Are you fucking kidding me? No, I never, I used to always say like, oh yeah, like, you know, what are you in town if you're a rental car? Oh, I'm a comedian. Now it's like no fucking chance. I'm like, I'm just working, I got work. I say I, you know what my job is and you guys can use this if you want.

Please. Um, a, I say I'm know what my job is and you guys can use this if you want please a I say I'm a what's it called fuck. It's slipping my mind. You know in the one word you need early I am a Magician advisor, what are they online with a C? Consultant consults on entertainment consultant. No not even entertainment. I just say I do consulting. Entertainment consultant. No, not even entertainment. I just say I do consulting. Because consultants travel. Yeah.

No, just like the whole thing where I said about the Brooklyn, Queens areas. They drink a lot. They drink a lot. But Brooklyn's Queens areas, they'll just nod their head. Right. Because no one wants to go, well, what's a consultant do? Right. Because everyone thinks they should know what it does, but no one knows what they do.

And if they did, then you're fucked. Like you can graduate college and work at a consulting firm. what the fuck do you know to consult anybody on anything? Yeah? So no one knows that job and they travel a ton so anytime I'm on a flight What do you just don't I do consult it? But then they see you watching on your laptop on the plane the bachelor and they're going consultants don't watch them Well, then they they go on they see you go like this like hey guys Everybody and then they're like yes J train train coffee hour like this guy's a weird consultant This guy's got a lot of influence in the consulting company

Well train it was a fucking pleasure was an honor. I wish I didn't know we need more history No, what the dude well we figured it out Jesus what a person yarmulke. We figured it. I'm good I the yarmulke stuff you don't I'm good. I yarmulke stuff You don't love you. You got to put it on the back of your head. Oh, I have it on wrong You know, it's just he's got a such a big head. It's got no place. Oh good. That's now you're looking a little Jewish What it is? Let me post this out post. That's Jewish. It will just be Israeli flags. No. Yeah Yeah, that's a more stylish way song she that's a non stylish Jew you're just looking like you were in a Mickey Mouse hat that's too small and the

years fell off that's that's the yarmulke that's basically yarmulke yeah all deal yeah beautiful yeah so thank you J train for the people find you at Jared Freed on Instagram come on on out. Don't even bother getting tickets, the shows are sold out. Sold the fuck out. Filly! When's this come out? This will come out... In four weeks. Come!

Filly punchline. Alright, love you guys.