History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 78 - Pearl Harbor was WILD!

Episode Date: July 7, 2019

The Japanese woke up the boys and this episode woke up Steel Pipe Chrissie! This is considered one of the Hyenas’ wildest episodes by fans! WEI ZHONG XIAN!Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

What's up, cuzzy wuzzies? You're listening to the Bay Ridgeenas i'm chris stefano aka chrissy go dick with me yanni papa yanni feta cheese mike mush is in here coughing he's got pneumonia I'm Chris DiStefano, a.k.a. Chrissy Goat Dick. With me, Yanni Papa, Yanni Fettichese. Mike Mush is in here coughing. He's got pneumonia. Zach Isis is sick. And Zach's also got a YouTube video that says, watch the FIFA Women's World Cup on Fox and FS1 Live.

And the answer is going to be no, because women are real athletes. Yeah. And listen, if you work for NASCAR or you're in car racing, listen, Chrissy Goat Dick is available for advertising. He's trying to put an Exxon Mobil logo on his dick because his dick is fucking Speed Racer. Yeah, it's a Speed Racer. And today, let me tell you something. We got a fucking nice episode that I'm really, really, really excited about.

We're going to talk about Pearl Harbor when unfortunately the fucking Japs got what was coming to them. Get the button ready. Japs got what was coming to them. Get the button ready. Japs got what was coming to them. Yeah, we're going to hear a lot of shortened ethnic clout. Yeah, that's right. We're doing a character piece. You woke up the fucking boys on December 7th. I came on.

Yeah, unfortunately, you got your chopsticks in a bunch. Yeah, thank you. Look, listen, the Japanese lost out for one reason, one reason only. Yeah, because they sit Indian style like first. Yeah, I mean, you are coming out of the gate with two pistols and you're just going back, back, back, back. Well, yeah, because I'm coming out of the

gate like fucking the Japs tried to come out of the gate with us to do a sneak attack on Pearl Harbor and they got beat back. Yeah, they got beat back. By myself, I'll take you physically. That's right. Yeah, your crumb bums. Yeah, your crumb bums. You tried it. Russo was down there. And if you don't like it, you go on that wall. Yeah, they got beat back. By myself, I'll take you physically. That's right. Yeah, your crumb bums. Yeah, your crumb bums. You tried it. Russo was down there. And if you don't like it, you'll go on that wall. Yeah. Now give me the lunch special.

Wei Song Xie. You're mixing it up with Chinese. Give me the bento box. Yeah, there you go. Give me the bento box, you fucking losers. Yeah, there we go. Oh my God. Welcome to I would listen. This is a lot of 14. My name is Sean Terry Welcome to Iowa. Listen, this is a lot of 14.

My name is Sean Terry. That's my friend, Patty Mulrooney. We do an audio podcast out of my uncle's apartment here in the basement. Yeah, we're in Ridgewood, Queens, also known as Canarsie, also known as wherever the else small-minded meatheads live. Yeah, that's where we live. But yeah, so fuck it. Oh, you all right?

I got coffee and I got fucking Chinese sauce all over my body. Look at me. The Chinese in our neighborhood do make a good cup of coffee, though. They do. They do. That's the best. And Japanese women will get cracked the fuck open and clean the fuck out. They are a hot fucking piece of Asian ass.

All women will get cracked open and cleaned up because we love everybody. Yeah. Except during times of war. Yeah, the times of war. Unfortunately. Yeah. Let me tell you something. Because of this episode, first of all, my grandfather, I think I've said this on the podcast, still he fought in World War II.

And he had another family somewhere. And he had another family somewhere. He viewed Japan as the enemy to the day he died. He never ate sushi and he never picked up chopsticks because he viewed them as the active enemy. Well, you know, the late into the 1990s. Well, you know, the old expression, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. And that apple is a big headed, brick headed fucking German from Ridgewood. Yeah.

What it is. Yeah. Listen, he also had another family somewhere. No, no. That was the other one. That's my father's. Because history just keeps repeating itself. Yeah.

Because make no mistake. because history just keeps repeating itself. Yeah. Because make no mistake, my mom's dad left the family and my mom had four brothers and sisters. So left my mom, my grandmother, my mother's mother as a single mom. And then my actual grant, my grandpa, who I called grandpa, came in and took over a family, met a woman who had five other kids. And that's just what I do.

I met a woman, another kid. And I said, in order to catch up, I'm going to have to just have a baby with her. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, we just kind of, we're products of our environment. Yeah. You don't have to be an anthropologist or sociologist to know that Mike mush, he's a product of San Antonio, Texas. By the way, I will be down there soon if you want to open for me. Yeah. What is it called? Laugh out loud. Yeah. Yeah. So my club in America, go ahead. Yeah, we'll be awesome. Yeah, what is it called? Laugh Out Loud? Yeah. Worst club in America.

Go ahead. No, I'm not kidding. No, it's a great club. It's a great club. It's a great club. I was honestly just kidding, but unfortunately, I'm not going back there. Do I do a good Mike emoji? Sort of.

It has like a little. Let's hear him. Mike, how you doing? How you doing? It's doing pretty good. Yeah. Where'd you come back from just now, Mike? San Antonio.

San Antonio. Yeah. It's a little. It's a little wet. It's a little wet. It's a little wet in there. Yeah. Yeah. It's all pretty good, yeah. Where'd you come back from just now, Mike? San Antonio. San Antonio, yeah. It's a little wet. It's a little wet in there. Yeah. Yeah. It's a little wet. And we're products of our environment.

And Zach Isis grew up on the mean streets of fucking Queens. Yeah, Queens. Zach's got a call today. He said, I came in here in a sweatshirt. It's 900 degrees in here. Yeah, but he's a rapper. He needs to tough up. Because he grew up in the mean streets of Queens with a Palestinian father.

Yeah. Who used to make no mistake, discipline, whatever kind of white his mom was. Yeah. And that kid, he's got it. He had to learn how to rap. He had to take it out. And yeah. Yeah. You know, and then eight months going to be a Queens version.

A mall called Scrabble. Yeah. And here's the thing. I'm just talking to the owner of this establishment. You know who you are. I just ate food in your studio. And I know that's against rules. But if you want to say something, how about I knock your head clean off and make it into

a matzo ball soup by myself i'll take this physically yeah you just did your head want to be a matzo ball then you say something to me i'll knock it clean off making a matzo ball soup shalom yeah you just you just don't care anymore i don't care you're at the point now if somebody has something to say to you you want them to say it within jab range yeah if you're gonna say, just get in jab range. I'll hit you with a clean left hook because make no mistake, this is 100 percent true. My mother called me at 10 o'clock this morning. So yesterday.

And said, I can't stand that woman. Yeah. Yeah. Happy, happy belated pride. I know this will come out in a few days. But yesterday when we filmed today's Monday, July 1st, yesterday was Sunday and it was World Pride Day, 50th anniversary of national pride. So shout out all the FFs and TBGs that are fans of ours.

Thank you so much for your support. And we support you as well. But I posted a picture of me wearing a shirt that had a guy, one guy getting blown by another guy. And it said, finish him. And I posted it and a lot of people liked it. And my mother called me this morning at 10 o'clock in the morning and she said chris i i really want you to tell me the truth i'm your mother i love you she's like but are you gay i swear yeah she asked me and you said mom i don't know she said i i said mom it's just a shirt i was just being funny yeah you know and

she said she said honey if you're gay, it's it's totally OK. We support that. She's like, but please just let me know if you're gay, because she said that coupled with some other things that I've heard you say. I'm going to need a few more brews. I just don't know if I just or not. I just need to know how many brews I need to pick up at the pathmark. Yeah. And I was like, where does she shop again? Shop. Right. She was basically asking you, should I pick up a six or a twenty four or twenty four? And I was like, mom, listen to or a 24 or 24 and i was like mom listen to me and listen good i was like i'm not by the way those two guys look like me and you yeah a little bit it looks like me guys make no mistake you're a photogenic good looking piece

of trash that's not what i look like in real life because you do you're a good looking kid in real life but you're also extremely photogenic you You're more photo. Yeah. You better look at pictures because you're as good looking in real life, but you got bad skin. In real life. You're a snow monkey. Yeah. So your skin looks like you've just been wind burned by winter. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Because I got pictures of Mayday Chrissy when it's over 90 degrees. Everyone from Asia is not safe and it's just the way that it is because Chris is in full-blown Mayday mode. Yeah, I'm in full-blown fucking Mayday mode. I'm in fucking, I'm Chrissy Blitzkrieg. Yeah. Chrissy little fucking.

Mike Emojiface better fucking just keep a hand up because he might get popped with a snap and right. He might get hit more than he might get hit. For no reason. Yeah, I may punch his head right back over that wall. Right. Yeah, it's just my way. Cuz, you had a good time in England, but tell the people. Yeah.

Do you want to do that here or should we save that for the Patreon? No, let's just do it, Cuz. Make no mistake. If the people who booked me here, then so be it. I'm spinning the wheel. So here's the truth to the situation. If you're owner of that club and I sent an email that somebody died in a family emergency. None of it's true.

It's just what it is. It's just what it is. Can I get to just what it is with different languages, please? Can you post to the picture? I remember, do we pay ISIS too much? Yeah. The truth of the situation is this. I had shows in London at the Soho Theater Monday and Tuesday.

By the way, thank you. So many Hyena fans came out. You guys know who you are. Thank you for it. It's so amazing to me and Giannis that we have international fans. So thank you guys so much for coming out to the shows in London. And we will come back as the History Hyenas and do the Soho Theater next year I promise you that. Did you Coco?

Well first tell us what you did and then I want to know what your Coco situation was overseas. I told you I Coco'd a girl who I'm not sure if it was a guy or a girl the lights were off and she wouldn't take her pants off and she would only keep the lights on but I was spinning the wheel and I was about four amps to lights in so I was fucking hammered

Again I like that you're watching you wait while you do this yeah i'm trying to say light beers yeah so um monday tuesday soho theater was great then thursday uh wednesday i took the train i had shows at the stand newcastle and i took um the train up there um it's about a three and a half hour train ride up into northern england where uh you know it's just a different place like northern england it was nice it was great the people were great but it's just you're really far away from london and then i felt really far away from new york city you're really far away from the baby and you're really far away from yanni at that point yeah i'm really you need to be close to either yanni or the baby or patty flatballs patty flatballs and and and i was really really far away um my phone didn't work unless i had Wi-Fi in the hotel, which was a piece of shit. No, it wasn't a piece of shit. It was it was actually a beautiful hotel, but it's a small thing. Small little little itty bitty hotel. And James Debo, little Debo was supposed to come out and meet me because he works for JetBlue. He does the bags, but he tells girls he's a pilot, but he does the bags. He was supposed to come he was supposed to come meet me uh when uh thursday morning so i was only supposed to have one night alone in newcastle so

which you would have just sucked it up for you you got a ball just no no no i did wednesday night i you know i i did what i always do i slept in the hotel bed with with all the uh with all the lights on and the tv on and i have the water running so i have a sound i had the lights on and the TV on. And I have the water running, so I have a sound. I had the water running in the bathroom, so there's always a sound to something. And then I put on music and I fell asleep. And I woke up, I popped out of bed every two hours with my heart racing. And then once the sun came up, I knew I was good to go. But unfortunately, when the sun came up, there was a text from Debo saying, I knew I was good to go. But unfortunately, when the sun came up, there was a text from Debo saying, listen, you know, I just thought I just thought that I could go to any airline and say that I work here at JFK for JetBlue and they would let me on a flight.

But that's not how it works. He said, so I couldn't get standby in any flight. So unfortunately, I can't come. He said, because JetBlue doesn't go international. start flying to london in 2020 you think you'll still be there and i was like i swear and i was like nah man so then i started then the idea started to creep in started to slowly creep in that i should probably leave yeah so yeah i don't know where that idea came from but it came from a place that look i understand you were across the atlantic osh yeah and you didn't feel safe i didn't feel safe you I didn't feel safe. You don't feel protected by Jesus because Jesus put the Atlantic Osh there to keep us safe. To keep us safe. Jesus put the Atlantic Osh in there between America and its enemies there for a reason. And also, I was outside of the borders of the wall, so I can't be protected by the wall if I'm over it.

Yeah. It's White Walkers everywhere. It's White Walkers everywhere. And they really don't like Americans over there. Yeah. And one of the comics was mouthing off about America. And I was like, you're going to about to lose your head. Yeah.

You're about to lose your fucking. Was he within range? I'm going to stuff a couple of American hot dogs in there. One of them is going to be my dick. Yeah. So you just. Yeah. So treat the uvula like a speed bag.

I'll treat the uvula like a speed bag. I don't care. Yeah. So. And say in it. Why are you doing it? In it. In it.

So when. So. So that was Thursday. I started to creep the idea and then I was going for a run. And then I'm sure, isn't it? Why are you doing it? Isn't it? Isn't it? So when? So so that was Thursday. I started to creep the idea and then I was going for a run. And then I'm sure my mind created it. Wait, does that before or after you told the Ritz Carlton staff that you were a baseball player? OK, so Monday and Tuesday, what happened real quick, just backtrack.

And I stayed at the Ritz Carlton in London for about a thousand a night. And so you were basically losing money on this trip. Losing money hand over fist. But you were spinning the wheel. Thank you, Zach. Yeah. So I was spinning the wheel. And then so I got into the Ritz-Carlton and they invented class and fashion in London.

And the Ritz-Carlton is like the original Ritz is London. So everybody's in suits, you know, $1,000 suits, Ted Baker suits, whatever it may be. Hugo Boss, shout out, Adolph. So all of them, all of them were in suits. And I came in in Lululemon sweats, an overthrow boxing sweatshirt, and a yogurt from Pret-a-Manger. And you were in a walking American flag. I was a walking American flag. So I came in and they couldn't believe that I was a guest there.

Like the guy kept checking me and he was like, first of all, I gave him my license. He's like, oh, we can't find your name. And I was like, no, it's there. I booked. And then I pulled up the confirmation and then he put it in and he goes, it's not popping up. I was like, it's right here. And then he finally, the third time, he's like, oh, here it is.

Like he was trying to, on be like get out and i could see security kind of looking at me and kind of just being in the area yeah because they want you out they wanted me out and then he was like what brings you into town and i was like i'm on the yankees why play for the new york spin the wheel and he's like oh for the baseball game that's coming this weekend i was like yeah i'm a i'm a relief pitcher yeah and uh was like, okay, right here. And then they gave me the room. They gave me the room. And then, yeah, I stayed out. I ordered room service. I spent, I would say

I spent about $3,000 in two days there. Yeah, spin the wheel. I spun the wheel and 3,000 pounds. We're cooking about 4,500 Americans. Yeah, welcome to a new game show called Chrissy D Spins the Wheel. Is he going to win money, lose money, get got a reel? We don't know. We don't know. So I spun the wheel and that was Monday night at the Ritz Carlton.

Then Tuesday I got the blowjob from the he, she, or I don't know what it was. You were spinning the wheel, cuz. I was spinning the wheel. I was having a good time. Was it a good blowy? It was a little toothy. It was a little toothy. Okay.

It was probably a girl there. Cause make no mistake, if it was a guy, they probably know how to do it better. Well, they had pretty big hands too. Yeah. Okay. So, um, yeah. So, so do that. I do had pretty big hands, too. Yeah, okay. So, um, yeah. So, so I do that. I do that.

And then, um... Was there any hair on the knuckles? No, but... It was dark in there. No, but I thought... Was there an Adam's apple? I thought I felt testicles. You thought so? She wouldn't take her pants off. Where'd you meet her? Thank you. Where'd you meet her? At the show. Okay, she was at the show.

Was she a fan? I think she's a fan. I hope. What is wrong with you, cuz? I mean, you didn't tell me she was a fan before we started talking about this. Do we need to cackle this all out? It's what it is. Do we need to cackle here? I'm not mentioning any names.

No, I know, but we're calling her maybe a guy. Yeah, but we're joking. We're doing a character piece. Mouthful guy. Yeah, but we're joking. We're joking. We're doing a character piece. Yeah. So anyway, so in Newcastle, plus they got a different legal system. They got a different legal system. Yeah. Thursday,

so Thursday, I go out for a jog in Newcastle, which is beautiful, by the way. I went on a nice tour and I saw the ancient city of Durham, which is good. I hired a local tour guide and then I told him and then I took a picture of him and I said it's for my podcast. And then I just told my fans, I met him on Grindr. Yeah, it's just what it is. It's just what it is. It's just what happens.

And he said he was going to follow me on Instagram. So now he knows. Yeah, follow us on Instagram because you posted it there too, at History Hyenas. At History Hyenas and also patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. So Thursday, what happens is so Thursday, what happens is is um so thursday what happens is is um i go out for a jog and i start to feel like really kind of sharp pains in my

lower stomach and i know it was probably nothing yeah but i convinced myself stomach cancer well no that my appendix was about to burst and i needed to get home to freedom yeah i needed to get within the wall so i have the best health care on this fucking planet. Yeah. Even though it ain't free. Yeah. So you wanted an Eastern Hemi or a South Asian doctor immediately. Immediately.

So what I do, I start to have the idea of, you know what? I got to leave. So we're having a conversation. All the comics are talking Thursday night at the show about plans that we're going to have Friday plans. We're going to have Saturday. And I'm like, yeah, I can't wait. I'm just going to be great.

I'm going to go. We're going to meet for coffee. I'm going to have Saturday. And I'm like, yeah, I can't wait. I'm just going to be great. I'm going to go. We're going to meet for coffee. I'm going to go Saturday. We're supposed to go to some beach. I was like, I never seen the Atlantic ocean from the English side. I'm excited. Bah,

bah, bah, bah, bah. And then I went back to my room. They were like, Oh, we're going to hang out.

I was like, you know what? I'm going to just turn in. Cause we've got a big day tomorrow. We're going to be, it's going to be exciting. And then I go into my room. Now,

wait a second. This whole time, you know that you're just lying to them. Cause you're not going to show up. Yeah. I've already booked a train ticket back to London. So it's already been booked and it's on my phone. So you're just, you're, you're, you've done that.

And the rest of it, you're just winging it. You're like, I'm going to, I'm going to cross the bridges as they come and figure out how I'm going to do damage control. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm just, I'm just lying. I'm lying. Yeah. So, and you're admitting it.

And this is why you're Chrissy. There's just the lights broken. We need the city to come fix it. Yeah. So this is an intersection. It needs a red light. It needs a red light. Can't have one.

So so what happens is, is I just say to myself, all right, I'm going to leave. So it's about 12 o'clock. My train back to London is at 6 a.m. So I just stayed awake. I literally sat. I was fully dressed, sitting at the edge of my bed, watching Friends reruns on their local TV channel, ITV4. And I waited till it was 5.50 and I was just up watching TV because I was so excited to come home. And then I started walking to the train station, got on the train at 6.05, got into London, St. Pancras.

I'm sorry, King's Cross Station at 9.30. to London, St. Pancras, I'm sorry, King's Cross Station at 930. And then I just got an $150 Uber. I just got an $150 Uber because I should have taken the train, but I just wanted to fucking get to the airport. And it was an hour and a half of traffic.

So I got to the airport and I didn't have a flight and I just walked up to the desk at Virgin Atlantic. I said, look, I got a business class ticket. Thank you, Mountain Dew. I said, I want to get on the next flight back to JFK. I don't care if I have to sit coach middle seat. Just get me back there. And then they said, well, you're a knuck because there's a business class ticket available for the 12 o'clock flight. So I said, I'll take it. So I got I get on the flight. And then I realized we're in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I realized I forgot to email

the club and I forgot to text the comic that I wasn't going to make any of the plans that I said. So I sent I sent I sent an email and a text from the middle of the Atlantic Ocean telling the club I had a family emergency that somebody died and telling the comic friend that I also had a family emergency. And it was a pleasure to meet them. And I and I really am upset that I had to leave because I was looking forward to the next two days. And I also had Yankees Red Sox tickets and I spent 250 pounds a ticket on that I just left. So I lost about 5,000 pounds. So let's just figure out, first of all,

I got two questions. There's a lot to digest before we get to Pearl Harbor. Yeah, before we get to those fucking sneaky... Yeah, yeah. We'll look at character piece. Yeah, it's character piece. Last one to eat. Yeah, thank you. We those fucking sneaky Yeah, yeah Well, look at the character piece Yeah, thank you We got a lot to digest here First off, I want to ask you

By the way, if you want to hear more about Chrissy's trip Go to our patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys for our last walk and talk again The walk and talks are just starting to get A little wild, because we're moving We're starting to get unaware That we're on air, and we're moving. Yeah. It's a little we're starting to get unaware that we're on air and we're just talking. Yeah. And also

yeah that and also just real quick I met the I met the chain smokers and one of my very close friends wives banged one of them out. What? One of my very close friends wives banged one of the chain smokers out. Who's the chain smokers? The chain smokers is a big band and I asked the music group and I asked

one of them if they knew a certain woman and they said yeah and then giggled. So I'm sorry to my friend. Okay, now what are we doing here? You're making my question even more intriguing because what is the point to tell all these people these things

if two days later you're just gonna on your very popular podcast just tell everybody what you did. Because the truth of the situation is if anybody's got anything to say, they get a clean left hook. You know what the truth of the situation is? Yeah. Because this is a party. We're at Chrissy D's party.

Yeah. You invite everyone over to your party. Yeah. But you know, there's one thing that showed up late. My brain. Your brain's not there yet. Yeah. My emotion's on muffin watch. Yeah. But you know, there's one thing that showed up late. My brain. Your brain's not there yet. Yeah. My emotions on muffin watch. Yeah. Your heart

is there. Your heart is there. We're all there. But your brain is just running late. It's caught in traffic. Yeah. So what happens is we're all dancing at the party and then your brain shows up and goes, oh, yeah, I got to make some damage control calls. Yeah. So but it's what it is. Yeah.

So, yeah. So, so that, that was my trip. So you spun the wheel, you hooked up with a guy and you left early. Big deal. Big deal. Seriously. Big deal. Big deal.

Big whoop. Yeah. And I only ate pizza. I pretty much ate pizza for every single meal because I just wanted to fuck it. I needed to feel American. I don't like leaving America anymore. Yeah. And I don't think I'm going to do it anymore.

Yeah. It's just, you couldn't. You can't be too If I'm not with the baby, I don't want to leave America. I'll only leave America with the baby. Because is there a way you could get like a backpack where you just put the baby in? You want to just take the baby from the situation? Yeah, I just want to take the baby from the situation. Yeah, we just take the baby, put her in a bag.

I meant the situation's new boyfriend. Today. Yeah, he's a nice guy. He had bedhead. So he's banging out kids mom. Yeah. I mean,

yeah. Yeah. I mean, we should tackle that. Yeah. He's a nice kid. Yeah. He's a nice kid.

And, and you're happy, you know, I'm happy. No, truly. I look at everything. She's happy.

I'm happy. She's happy because everything in my life now is looking at my life from the point of view of the baby. So if the baby's mother's happy because of the baby's mother's new boyfriend, then that makes the baby happy. Then that's all I care about. If the baby's got optimal happiness, whatever that takes, because my baby's – I got a happy baby. I swear to God, pretty soon all three of you are just going to be sitting on the curb at the bottom of that block. Yeah. You know?

And you're just going to be just sitting there on the curb just sharing a Gatorade. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Picking up each other's kids. So it's just what it is. It's just what it is. Yeah.

In about a year, my daughter will have a new sibling and it'll be nice. Yeah. So that's going to be nice. So it's just what it is. It's just what it is. We're going to move out of this territory and get back into into, you know, just just mellower, shallower waters. What do you want to talk about?

I just want to swim back into the shallow end of this pool. OK. And get back into the history part of the hyenas because we've gone full blown. I mean, we may just have to spray cackles all over that first part of the episode. Yeah. I went wild. I mean, yeah, we we got to get like a cackle whiteout and just go back and just. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, did somebody give you truth serums? Yeah. I don't know what's going on, but yeah, I'll probably. It's good to have you back in the USA, though. Yeah. No, I just I think that's what happened. I think going to England was nice and I'm happy I went, but I'm just, yeah, I don't.

I'm just good not leaving the U.S. for a while now. Yeah. Or if you do leave the U.S., we talked about that. I think you need to bring a little bit of New York with you, whether it be the baby, Debo, Paddy Fly Balls, me. I didn't feel this way in Germany because you were right there in the bed next to me. Yeah. Yeah.

You were good. Yeah. Because you knew I was close. Yeah. I remember when Paddy Fly Balls came into the room drunk. Yeah. Remember that day he came in? In the morning. Yeah, he was doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You catch the Ridgewood. You bury a lot of emotions and then you just do this with your wrist. Yeah, just flick the wrist. Yeah, and that's the way to get it out. Yeah. What does he call those? One of those heebie-jeebies? Yeah, he's got the scary.

He calls them the scary. Scary. So he just has a panic attack. He's like, I got the scary. I got the scary. Well, the scary just could be his body going, we're about to shut down because we're alcohol poisoned. You have 50, 60 beers. Yeah. I mean, we're about to shut down because we're alcohol poisoned. You have 50, 60 beers.

Yeah. I mean, you're bleeding out of your ears. This isn't an anxiety attack. You could die. You could die. Yeah. And Patty, thankfully, did get his shipment of Blue Chew, so he's rock hard for summer. He is rock hard for the summer, which is good.

It's good for America. It's good for us all. Yeah, it's good for us all. He was the F. He was at the gay parade, the pride parade for 19 hours yesterday doing overtime. Yeah. And he was sending me videos. It was funny.

Does anything more than five fighter loves or a cop loves in overtime? They love overtime. Yeah. He texted us the hours. He said, I got paid from 0900 to 0200. Yeah. He sent it to the group chat as if we care. They do military time?

Yeah. He does military time and he doesn't say lunch. He says meal. He says I got meal time. Yeah. Make no mistake, Sergio. I hope and he doesn't say lunch. He says meal. He says I got meal time. Yeah. Make no mistake, Sergio. I hope you guys enjoyed our last episode. The fans missed you very much.

They always miss you very much when you go away. Why, Sergio? I heard it was good, though. Sergio was great. Sergio was great. He's great off the bench, Sergio. He's our honorary Bay Ridge boy now. Yeah.

But he did tell us on the last cast that. We got to turn your ringer off. I know. When, when, when you guys go on the road. Yeah. First of all,

we're joking about how organized you are and how disorganized I am. I basically make Sergio tell me where I need to be. Yeah. Cause I just don't know. I'm just winging it. But then we discovered that you on purpose, you on purpose get one room because you want to sleep in the same room with Sergio. It's what it is.

He said, Chris will get another room. He'll get another room to bang someone out and then come back to sleep with me in the room. Yeah. I mean, because you don't like sleeping alone. Am I a wild kid? You are a wild kid. Listen, there's fans listening right now. We haven't got to Pearl Harbor yet, but there's good reason.

What I'm telling you is the absolute truth. I'm not exaggerating for comedic effect. There's no hyperbole in this whatsoever. He gets another room. So there is a vacant hotel room for another adult, and he will vacate that hotel room to go back and say goodnight to Sergio and sleep so he can be close to somebody. Yeah. And that's just the truth, right?

It's just the truth. It's just es lo que es lo. And Sergio just says, yeah, I just think he doesn't like sleeping alone and that's just what it is. It's just what it is. You feel happier just knowing he's there? Yeah. I just feel happier just waking up and just seeing, yeah, another guy from New York right

there. Yeah. It's like a bunk mate yeah yeah you're not a kid who does good alone unless you're alone in new york yeah yeah like like last night my daughter wanted to go sleep in her bed and i was like no babe there's monsters in there you gotta sleep in my bed yeah you don't like being alone in the room it's just what it is cuz mike every time he laughs there's a little cough and i'm a little worried he He actually looks real good, Mike. Mike, do you have a wolfing cough again?

Yeah, you look good with the beard. Because do you have any Eastern Hemi in you at all? No, I don't at all. He looks like a little Mongolian. Yeah. Well, because I guess Mexicans originally, the native people of the Americas, they marched over the Bering Strait. And so they were originally Asiatic. Right.

So that's where a little bit of the Asiatic comes from. You got a little Eastern Hemi in there way back, just like he's got a real, real snow monkey background. I mean, we're talking about tribal Germanic snow monkey. Yeah. Like a real snow monkey. Yeah, like a real one. So anyway, it's good to have you back, Chrissy. And we're brought to you, as always, by 9th Street Auto Collision.

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Promo code WILD at checkout For 15% off your order We love all our sponsors. You guys are sentimental to us because we're too big for you and you're lucky. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. Because we're dealing with Pearl Harbor today. It's patriotic. We're close to July 4th. Yeah.

We're going to Verzi's house. We're going to get banged up. You're bringing the baby. No, the baby's not coming because the baby's hanging out with the baby's mother's boyfriend. Yeah, it's just what it is. It's just what it is. So it's just got to deal with that. So that means you're going to have a couple pops on the fourth. I'm going to have a couple pops. Are you going to get a little emotional?

I might get a little emotional. And unfortunately, depending on the kind of mood I'm in and how hot it is, and especially with a couple of pops in me, if somebody says something to me and I did this to them. And they're in range. And they're in range. They may just get a left hook and lose their head. Yeah, look, I got to have a little

advice for anyone right now dealing with Chrissy. Okay, he's got a situation with some so what you want to do is you want to stay at what's your reach? I don't know, but I got long arms. He's got a good jab. It comes kind of slowish but the snap and right's quick.

That's the shooting hand. That's the right. And that comes quick. The right comes snapping it quick. And even Sergio said today it's starting to really hit now. It's starting to sting a little bit too because he's starting to put on a little muscle

and he's back on where he's really taking testosterone. It's just what it is. It's just what it is. So yeah. So if you're going to say something to Chrissy you'll want to stay out of range.

Yeah. If you're going to say it make sure you're a little far black so you can see him coming because if you're within jab range you're going to get popped. You sure you're a little far black so you can see him coming because if you're within jab range, you're going to get popped. You're going to get popped. And your pants are going to fall down. Pants are going to fall down. I'm starting to get real fucking

like nuts with everything now. My life's starting to get nuts. I may start bug chasing. Do you know what that is? Fucking guys in the answer have HIV and seeing what happens. Are those guys the original spin into the wheel? That's the original spin. Can we just call those guys Pat Sajaks? Those are Pat Sajaks.

They're spinning the wheels when they take crystal meth and then fucking chase the bugs. You're wild. Yeah, that is a wild thing. You fucking guy in the ass, Rod Deasy, and you know he has HIV, and you just spin the wheel, you see what happens. Yeah, why do they do that? It's just an adrenaline rush, right? You're on crystal meth.

You just go fucking nuts. Because it's an adrenaline rush, the danger of it. Yeah, it's an adrenaline rush. Is it a little appealing to you when you think about if you were a gay guy, you think you'd be a bug chaser? I probably would be a bug chaser. Most likely I'd be a bug chaser. I think if I was a gay man, I'd 100% have active HIV. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think there's any way around that because I go raw and easy.

Yeah, that's what you do, right? It's just what it is. Yeah, you go outside without a raincoat. Yeah, that's what it is. I like to get wet. Yeah, that's what you do, right? It's just what it is. Yeah, you go outside without a raincoat. Yeah, that's what it is. I like to get wet. Yeah, so... So, yeah, so Pearl Harbor, it happened December 7th, 1941, when the U.S.,

the United States, who were neutral during World War II, we got attacked by these flying eastern hemi monkeys, and they... Wait, Jong-Jin. No, that's going to actually need a... I think we might need a cackle there. Yeah, we just might need a cackle. Yeah, these fucking flaming

chopsticks came in. We may need a cackle. Do we think we need a cackle? Or do you think we need a cackle? I think the last one's okay. The last one's okay, but the four of us... Yeah, we're just going to need a cackle. It's cool. So look at us. Yeah, I mean, you're just a tightrope walker and sometimes there's a gust of wind that just blows you

over. Yeah. So these lemon suckers came in and we need to cackle. We need cackles everywhere. This is just cackles. Just cackle here, Zach. Can you make a note? I mean, we're talking about wartime. I know, but you're going straight.

I mean, you're going straight in. You're going straight in. You went straight in and now fucking fucked straight in one straight in and now yeah i mean so um yeah so it happened do you think we beat the japanese just because i mean we're just bigger kids because we more protein i mean raw fish can only give you so much protein yeah yeah you got big kids we cows yeah we're big kids so you know they want to fly their little fucking planes in there that they their little bodies, but they're too little. So what happened is, is we came in with the big boys. It's like, yeah, you sunk a couple of our battleships, but then we had to drop the fucking hammer on you.

Unfortunately, you had to get nuked. Yeah. Yeah. Not for one day. This is all a character piece. It's what it is. It's like, you know what, guy? You want to fucking, here's the thing.

Here's the, listen, Imperial 1941 Japan, here's the thing. If you're hearing it and it's not cackled. If you're hearing it, here's the issue. Here's the issue. Here's what happened. Here's what we said. We said, okay, yeah. You know what?

Yeah, you sunk a few of our battleships, but guess what? Now your whole country's going in the microwave. It's Fuso Lucas. the microwave. You know, I had a feeling that this might be dangerous. First episode back with you in the States this close to 4th of July. I had a feeling that maybe Pearl Harbor was a little bit too

much of a dangerous topic. Yeah. Yeah. Because I don't know if you just heard it or if you did. Because we're just spinning the wheel with whatever ISIS wants to cackle. Because at this point we're going Donald Trump. There's just too much. Yeah. We can't cackle the whole episode, Chrissy. Yeah. I'm just kidding.

Yeah. We're doing a character piece. We're doing a character piece. Well, we should cackle out the first part, but we got to lose the last thing. I don't know. I don't know anymore. I mean, it's just so. I think that one was okay. Okay. Yeah.

But we'll lose the first part. It's historically accurate. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just, you know, unfortunately. Yeah. We had to.

Yeah. Yeah. Turn your country to a couple of hot pockets. Look, it was. It's just what it was. I'm sorry. It's a bad thing to happen to everybody. Yeah.

No, it's horrible that civilians had to suffer. It is absolutely horrible that civilians had to suffer there. But you did, truth be told, you did wake up the boys. Yeah, I mean, I don't know what you're really thinking. Yeah, look, there's a lot of conspiracy theorists out there that say, blah, blah, blah. Listen, the truth of the situation is they woke up the boys. It was a preemptive attack.

Yeah. They didn't declare war on us. Yeah. A couple of thousand boys died. It was a preemptive attack. Yeah. They didn't declare war on us. Yeah. A couple of thousand boys died. It was brutal. They sunk some battleships, but most of them we repaired and got them right back up and they were in action. The only one we lost was Arizona.

And listen, we don't care about him because John McCain was a senator from Arizona and he was mean to our Fuhrer Donald Trump. Yeah. No, obviously we're just joking. Can I get away with Zhang Jing? That was a complete way Zhang Jing joke. Yeah. We're just we're just joking. That was a character piece calledxing? That was a complete Wei Zhongxing joke. Yeah, we're just joking around. That was a character piece

called I'm Chrissy D. Yeah. Yeah, so I do not support Donald Trump. Yeah, neither do I. I don't support anybody. Yeah, no, me neither. Me neither. Trump 2020. Wei Zhongxing. Yeah. But yeah, so World War II had been going

on already for a couple years in Europe and Asia. And so I think what the thinking was is that, you know, a you know, Japan wanted to take over more territory. Yeah. So I think in order to do that, they felt like because they were getting closer and closer to Hawaii, they want they felt like, you know what? We don't want to get too close. And then the U.S. decides they want to you know, they don't like what we're doing because they're basically fucking, you know, we don't want to get too close and then the u.s decides they want to you know they don't like what we're doing because they're basically fucking you know japan was brutal i mean yeah germany gets all the press but japan was being brutal and there was a lot of war crimes rape of nan king and they were really being like atrocious there was like a lot of atrocities that were committed by the by the uh you know country of japan during world war two times so i think that

they felt that you you know what, before the U.S. finds out what we're doing and wants to get involved and has the whole weight of their Navy and Army on us, let's try to knock them out of the war before they can even begin. Yeah, well. That was a big mistake. Well, we had sanctions on them. We had sanctions, but in some ways, the tension had been high for a while.

Right. And the British had some outposts there, Guam, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. In Pearl Harbor? In the eastern hemisphere. Yeah. In the eastern hemisphere, the British had some outposts. Yeah. So they thought we were going to they wanted those outposts.

They thought we were going to defend those outposts. We were trying to negotiate. We wanted them out of China. They were already in China. We were trying to do these conditional surrenders. They kept trying to negotiate. And basically, Roosevelt at the time said, we don't negotiate with terrorists. Yeah.

And that's just what happened. I mean, that's just the way you can. That's the way you can. You can really sum it up because they were trying to negotiate. Japan wanted certain things. And Roosevelt just said, no, we want a full withdrawal of China. We don't negotiate with terrorists. And it's what it is.

We may or may not attack you. It's what it is. They wanted Japan out of China. They wanted Japan 100 percent out of China. We don't negotiate with terrorists and it's what it is. We may or may not attack you. It's what it is. They wanted Japan out of China. They wanted Japan 100% out of China. And Japan said, no, I cannot do it. Sorry, Ali Wong. Not for a team. So we kept trying to negotiate and actually I think

the last negotiation they tried to do actually happened while their aircraft carriers had already left to go into the Pacific Ocean. Yeah. And the leader, the leader. To attack us. Yeah. And the guy whose like idea was Hideki Matsui. No, not Hideki Matsui. That guy played for the Yankees.

This guy. Yamamoto was the. Isoruko Yamamoto. Sounds like a cell phone. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. We know we're radio DJs in the morning.

We get it. We get it. Yeah. Yeah. You're right. Your criticism's right. We're a couple of fucking hacks. Yeah.

Isoroku Yamamoto. Ichiro. His name's Ichiro. Yeah. His name. Yeah. He sounds like one of my stereos. Suzuki. Soiro. His name's Ichiro. Yeah, his name, yeah, he sounds like, yeah, one of my stereos. Suzuki. So, yeah, Suzuki.

He didn't want to go to war. He did not want to go to war with the U.S. because he knew that the full industrial might and will of the Americans, you know, because he knew that basically the Americans were better. He knew that, that the Americans, that they weren't going to

beat us because we had all the fucking industry in America. We had the war machine. We just were choosing to stay neutral. So he actually really didn't want to do it. But however, we also had rock and roll, which kept us loose. We kept us very loose. Yeah. When we get on the battlefield and you listen to a little Chuck Berry, it keeps you loose.

Keeps you loose. Even though he's pissing on toots. Yeah. They're listening to. We're sitting there. you loose, even though he's pissing on toots. Yeah, they're listening to Sinaia and Numbawa. We're sitting there. Yeah, we're ready to rock. But the military leaders of Japan

decided, you know what? We're going to fucking war. They took a couple of bows and they said we're going to war. So Yamamoto he didn't want to do this, but he had no choice. So he had to go to the war, and he was given the unfortunate task of attacking

Pearl Harbor, and he said that he knew, even though the damage, I mean, they destroyed Pearl Harbor. I mean, they got a decisive victory in Pearl Harbor. They sunk battleships. They killed 2,000 U.S. troops and civilians. Yeah, but they did wake up the boys.

The thing is, but they woke up the boys. But he said later on, a couple months later, that it was a big mistake because then in the Battle of Midway, which he was also present at, make no mistake, the Japanese got fucking field goal kicked. Yeah, and then Hiroshima and Nagasaki, which Yeah, which, yeah.

Which historians say wasn't necessary. A lot of historians claim it wasn't necessary because they felt like the war was already won, Japan was going to capitulate, but that we did it in order to scare Stalin because we knew that the Cold War was coming. It's probably true. Yeah, no, that's an atrocious thing that happened all around that we did too.

But on the flip side, you say, hey, at least the world got to see how bad it can be if it hopefully never happens again so like yeah it's like one of those things it's like that saving private ryan thing a horrible thing happened but it's for a bigger cause you know it's like you can't make omelets without breaking eggs maybe that's the silver lining of it i'm not claiming that is yeah because a lot of people suffered and it was very horrible yeah but at least suffering in japan to this day so it's brutal yeah with radiation all that but you can say at least maybe that's the silver lining if there is any that's what it is but yeah maybe we probably didn't need to do it but you know war is war and uh it's brutal brutal all around and

you did attack us first yeah so you did do what you did. Yeah. Yes, exactly. The Imperial Japanese Navy made a big mistake. Yeah. It said, oh, it's lunchtime. Time to heat up my sushi. Yeah. I mean, World War Two had already been raging, you know, for a couple of years at this point. So it sets the stage. Japan at that time was just they were going into Asia. They were I mean, into China. into china they were they were they were they were in hong kong they were they were getting in places where the brits had hegemony and uh it was making everyone a little uncomfortable because the japs were a war machine just like the germans yeah no the japan for you know for a small island i mean they were running they took over all of

china right i mean pretty much and they did horrible horrible, horrible things. Horrible things. Okay, Ali. Yeah. So if I do a Japanese accent, it's okay. And it's like, and it's an even bigger credit to the Japanese army to take over an entire country of China because you don't know who's who. Wei Songxian. That is exactly that. What I mean, they're taking over Mexico. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly what it is.

We're taking over Mexico. Yeah. That would hit me late. I was doing something else. Yeah, so, you know, you got to be really efficient. You know, Chrissy, I didn't even think of that. Tough to tell who the enemy is.

How do you think they did that? I don't know. They're just really good soldiers and they could just, I don't know, maybe they could, maybe they smell different. Wei Songxian. By the way, our next guest, we've got great guests coming up. We got Aparna, Nanjiami will be here. Yeah.

There's a lot of comics who want to be on this podcast. Who love what we do. What's his face is coming on? Sean King. Kamuchi. Yeah, we're going to get Sean King. We're going to get Kamuchi. Jabba Patel.

The guy from The Truth from Apu. Yeah. We're going to get that kid on. We're going to get, what's his name? Hidora Kazbasi. Yeah. We're going to get fucking Tim the Turban on. Chris

is going wild today. Yeah. Tim the Toot, you meant. He's a patron. Yeah, Tim the Toot. Yeah, Tim the Toot is who we're going to get on. Yeah, we're going to get our fucking Sandy 7-Elevens on. Keith Penna's as Omnias. Yeah, and also Wei Shang Xing.

Wei Shang Xing. That's what they... It was a character piece, both. Yeah. We have to cackle a lot. We may have to just call them through this one like we're looking for lice on a child. Yeah, so Zach, if you could just, yeah, because I still haven't gotten some of the money

I need. Yeah. Some of the corporate checks I haven't cleared. So the Japanese referred to Pearl Harbor as the Hawaii operation or Operation AI, like Allen Iverson. Yeah. So somehow they called it Allen Iverson, which is funny because they ended up loving Marbury, not Iverson.

Interesting. Because Marbury became a huge star over in China. In China. Yeah. Are we talking about Japan or China? I mean, if you're standing across the street, I mean, you tell me. Yeah. So it's just... Cuz, you brought up a good point

about what they did over there. You think the Chinese killed a lot of their own guys by accident? I think it was just an accident. I mean, we're going fucking wild. We are going wild today. Yeah. But we're having a good time, cuz. I think you missed the weekend. You just... You're pent up. I'm pent up, and I apologize. Obviously, going wild today. Yeah. But we're having a good time because I think you missed the weekend. You just you're pent up. I'm pent up and I

apologize. Obviously, I love everybody. Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Happy pride. I love everybody. We're just joking around with your character. Peace live 14. Yeah. So in Southeast Asia, you know, like the Japanese at the same time, a lot of people don't know this at the same time that they attacked Pearl Harbor. They had simultaneous

attacks on the u.s held philippines guam like i mentioned wake island uh in malaysia singapore and hong kong right so they were attacking everywhere they were attacking all like the british empire strongholds and they were letting people know hey look we're here now right we're a machine we have an emperor and we fight for the emperor and, you know, they're kamikaze pilots. Those guys go up there to die.

Yeah. How do you beat those guys? How do you beat those guys? How do you beat suicide bombers? How do you beat fucking kamikaze pilots? It's not with wokeness. What's it with?

It's with good old red, white and blue. Yeah. Freedom. Freedom. Yeah. That's how you beat them. And a little and some bombing. Yeah. Freedom. Freedom. Yeah. That's how you beat them. And a little and some bombing. Yeah. And some

bombing. Yeah. You don't beat them by saying like, oh, let's all love each other. Let's, you know, utopian society. What you do is you say, guys, step into this room and then you put one minute on the microwave. Yeah. Something like that. Something like that. So the Japanese launched out six fucking aircraft.

You know what I always think about when I never think about how modern warfare happens. Like you have to mobilize. Yes. Like that's why the Battle of Crete, which is one of our favorite episodes in the favorite episodes. You got to get these strategic locations to mobilize your attack. You can't attack Pearl Harbor from Japan. You got to set up here. You got to drive out strategic locations to mobilize your attack. You can't attack Pearl Harbor from Japan. You got to set up your, you got to drive out with your aircraft carriers with a lot of fuel, need a lot of oil.

Yeah. Food, everything. Yeah. We did that episode on the fucking Swedish cities that were important to the right because they wanted to get their iron ore from there. You need these raw materials that, that fuel your war machine because they drove six aircraft carriers out into the Pacific and launched their attack from there. Yeah. It wasn't – usually you think, oh, yeah.

Nobody even thinks about how did the Japanese do – there's a whole logistics that goes to actually attacking. Sure. And you have to do that right. And they were at a distance where like the U.S. couldn't even retaliate and get out to bomb the aircraft carriers. They were in the middle of the ocean. Just taking off. Yeah, the middle of the ocean. So the Japanese sank or damaged three American cruisers,

three destroyers, and one mine layer. I don't know what that is. You're from San Antonio. So do you know there's bases down there? I just feel like all other cities have troops walking around. It's landlocked, so they don't have the boats the boats oh that's right yeah do you know what that is a mine layer my mind is a sea mines yeah but the mind yeah like those mines like you know if a ship

hits one it fucking blows up the ship oh yeah so so that's like a thing and then you know the mine layers i guess their job is to obviously put the mine down and then know exactly where it is so the U.S. ships avoid it. Right. They still find mines out in the ocean or watch up on shore. That could explode. So it could take down a Caribbean cruise ship by accident. Possibly. It's possible.

A bunch of fat Germans. A Norwegian cruise makes a wrong right and hits an old World War II mine. See ya. Yeah, we'd lose a lot of we'd lose a lot of practical Joker face. My name is not Tim Dillon. So all in all, we've got to give this, look, this game,

if it was a game, we're giving this set to the Japanese. They took out 188 U.S. aircraft. They killed 2,403 Americans, almost as many as 9-11. Who died more on 9-11 or 9-11? 9-11 was over 3,000.

9-11, we lost more boys. Yeah. Now, how long, based on 2,400 lost American lives, if you were alive during there and you were in Ridgewood, I know you're a German kid, so you might have been a little torn. Yeah. You might have been a little torn. Yeah. You might have been a little torn. But let's say you were as patriotic as you are today and you're Chrissy

Cackles now, back then. Based on that amount of fatalities, how long mathematically do you not jerk off for? For that? Yeah. For that? For 2,400 American lives to lose? I probably

wouldn't jerk off until we drop the nuke. You'd wait till that. Then you can go to town. So that's the proportion. Then the deaths of those people are avenged. Are avenged, yes. And by the way, I know we're going wild, but I'm just kidding. I think that the nuclear bomb, I think it was atrocious how many innocent Japanese people died.

Truly. Of course. It's brutal. Yeah. Because if you ever, I've watched documentaries from the point of view of the Japanese and it's brutal. I mean, kids dying. It was brutal. Yeah, but they did start it.

So look. But didn't Japan kill mostly soldiers? No, no. Japan was fucking brutal to the Chinese and brutal to civilians. Okay. So I'm kind of, look, I went to a liberal arts college and I get what's going on. I'm an FF. And I get what's going on, but like

it's culminated now where it's like there's this comic book kind of fucking anti-American way to look at history and I'm kind of sick of it. I've kind of fucking had enough of it because there's atrocities on both sides, but make no mistake, we're no different from everybody else.

Everybody else needs oil. Everybody else needs fucking fuel. We don't act any different like any other empire or any other fucking country. First off. Second off, World War II, we saved the fucking world from fascism. Make no mistake. There was no conspiracy that the fucking – I don't want to hear anyone feel bad for the Japanese. What happened, yes, I feel bad for the civilians and all that shit. But war is horrible.

OK, fucking war is horrible. The Japanese had that kamikaze kind of fucking pride thing. They said they were going to surrender, but you don't know if they're going to keep fighting. At that point, it's to end the war and to protect boys. It's horrible. Civilians died. But let's not fucking lose sight of what happened here. We got Pearl Harbor.

They attacked our country and killed our boys without without even declaring war on us. So it was a fucking terrorist attack. That's a terrorist attack. And it's a dirtbag move. And that's what it is. We should lock the entire nation of Japan up in Guantanamo Bay right now. Because it's like this country has no fucking pride. You go to Sweden, you go to Norway, countries I've been to.

They put they paint their fucking Swedish fags on their face. And if you do that here, you're considered a racist. It's wild. Oh, yeah. If you have an American flag outside your house, you're considered a racist because you voted for Trump. Yeah, it's wild.

It's actually gotten too much. Like, I understand your point to an extent. America has done some fucked up shit. But come on, guys. Yeah. There's a lot of, I mean, come on. Everyone has. And we're, you live here. There's a reason why your parents

fucking fled whatever country they were from to come here for opportunity. So come on. Wow, that's just patriotic pappas right there. I mean, I'm just saying that just to I don't only go that side, but I'm saying like that side needs to be

remembered a little bit. We've gotten to the point where it's just like it's all like, you know, they teach classes about how the United States shouldn't have dropped the bomb. It's like, is that really what the class should be about a premise? Or it should be like, let's explore why this happened. It's just like the class is like, let's just blame America for what they did. You know, it's like a real fucking 15 year old kind of understanding of what's of what happened, what happened. And it's always anti-American in America, which is wild. And that's what you go overseas.

They all fucking hate us. They all hate us. They're just shitting on America. It's like a cool thing to hate us. It's like, listen, Britain, you do the same shit we do. You did it worse for longer. Stop fucking playing, dude. You want your iPhone for one hundred dollars or nine hundred dollars. So stop, Britain. Stop fucking playing, dude. You want your iPhone for $100 or $900?

Yeah. So stop, Britain. Stop it. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. I'm sorry. I just lost control a little bit there.

No, but I get it. It kind of turned me on. So look, yo, the Japanese in Pearl Harbor, they only lost 29 aircraft, five midget submarines, and only 64 servicemen were killed. One Japanese sailor, Kazuo Sakamaki, was captured. Can we find out what happened to him? What happened to K-A-Z-U-O

Sakamaki? He was the one captured Japanese sailor. That would be interesting if he's like, hey, I stayed in America, fell in love with freedom and opened a sushi restaurant in des moines eventually so yeah his name is kazwa sakamaki yeah so after pearl harbor um later in the day japan did declare war on the united states um the following day and States the following day. And then the following day, Congress declared war on Japan and then Germany and Italy declared

war on the U.S. And U.S. obviously responded with a declaration war against Germany and Italy. So it was on from that. That's when we entered the war, 1941. And as FDR famously said, this day will live in infamy. And it was on. And we were in the war. But, you know, tensions between the United States and Japan had been around for a long time.

Yes. From what? Since the 1920s, actually. Oh, see, I didn't know that. Yeah. After World War I. Yeah. I mean, they they they

remain training part trading partners like they were trading. But as Japan expanded into China and and the the second Sino-Japanese War, Sino-Japanese War happened in 37. Yeah, there we go. The tension started to expand. We will do another episode on the Japanese war between China and Japan. So we were not happy about that. And so those were the negotiations I was I was talking about that, that the explosive didn't go off in the submarine. He actually swam under it and then he fainted from lack of oxygen. He was found on Sand Island, found by some soldiers. He was taken to Sand Island where he asked to kill himself and they did not allow him to do that. Oh, yeah, because that's the rather kill themselves. And yeah, I mean, he wasn't allowed to kill himself.

Yeah. But you don't know what happened to him after that. He was basically he was sent back to Japan. He didn't want to talk about any of this until 1991. And then we wrote a memoir about it. Can we get him on the podcast? He did die. Oh, in 1991.

Yeah. These these these fucking guys live long lives. Yeah. I got to give Japanese live long. They do. They have a very healthy diet. Yeah. And no stress.

They don't stress out. No. And they love- They just fly fucking planes into this side of warships. Yeah. I mean, they're seriously not stressed out at all, those guys. No, kamikaze. And they love scotch.

They make scotch now. They do great scotch. Yeah. The Japanese make great scotch. They fell in love with scotch. And just like the Scots, they started making it. No, it's- I'd like to go to Japan.

Yeah. Well, Sakamaki ended up working for Toyota. Oh, yeah. Imagine that being a being a captured prisoner of war in one of the most famous battles in America and then going to just just going to your regular job at Toyota every day. Yeah. You know, it's fucking nuts. Yeah. There's a lot of people like that.

I mean, it's why guys from Navy Navy uh seal team six that killed bin laden probably are just discharged and have regular jobs now right i mean is that kind of how it works yeah like you know yeah and you know what the u.s did finally uh stop uh their oil exports to japan in 1941 and that of course is like where people say oh you know the attack was never when they kind of blame america it's like we were squeezing the road it like, yeah, look, they were fucking expanding into China. They were doing horrible things. What do you want? What do you want? What do you want? What utopia do you live in? On August 17th, supposedly Roosevelt warned the Japanese that America was prepared to take steps if neighboring countries were attacked.

So, you know, the tensions were just always there and they were rising and rising and rising. And I think I remember, too, that they did a Gallup poll back then and like over 50 percent of Americans expected that there was going to be a war with Japan, you know, sometime in the 30s, the late 30s, they did a poll. And so most people were reading about it all the time, were reading about the tensions. And the interestingS. ambassador to Japan really wanted Roosevelt to take the meeting to try to preserve peace.

That's his job. Then that government, the Konoye government collapsed. The Japanese military rejected a withdrawal of their troops from China. Japan had a final proposal that they sent on November 20th. And they did offer the United States to withdraw from southern Indonesia and to not attack,

do any attacks in Southeast Asia. As long as the United States, the UK and the Netherlands stopped giving aid to China and lifted their sanctions against Japan. And the Americans counterproposal said, fuck you. And they required Japan to completely evacuate China, like I said, without conditions, because we do not negotiate with terrorists. Yeah. And that was on the proposal was on November 27th. And how funny is this?

On November 26th, the day before, like we said, Japan had already left port and was already on their way with their aircraft carriers to attack Pearl Harbor. So they didn't expect the United States to be conciliatory. And, you know, they called a preventative attack but fuck them they attacked us whatever the reason is yeah they did attack the united states what are you gonna do yeah so the movie tour to our tour is about it's about them not getting to them in time to stop after the negotiations yeah and does it kind of blame the united states a little bit every fucking movie blames the united states that one is actually made by akira kurosawa uh but it doesn't really blame the united states it just blames the situation it's like actually kind of puts it more on japan

for being too uh just wanting to go out there and do it yeah and i know what i'm saying shu because look i went like i said i went to a liberal arts college i actually took a class with a guy who wrote a book and who was an expert on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. And he kind of brainwashed me at the time to think like, hey, it was really unnecessary to drop this bomb. And it's like, is it? Is it? I mean, like, you know, it's like instead of just saying, hey, here's here's the here's you can look at it this way. You can look at it this way.

Here's some pros. Because it already happened. So it's like to just say bad guy, good guy like that's what happens a lot it's like americans bad guy here and the japanese are it's like and he doesn't focus on all the things the japanese were doing so i remember saying to my friend who was uh who was a marine in world war ii we were i was at his house you had a friend who was a marine in world war his grandpa his grand pops we're having dinner we're having dinner. We were having dinner. I was going to say, you got some old friends.

I almost gave his grandfather a heart attack because we were at the dinner table and I kept saying how it was unnecessary for us to drop the bomb on Japan. And he was a soldier and he was just like, fuck it. You were saying that? Yeah. And he was like- Oh, because why? He wanted to just choke me out because I was taking this class and that's what this teacher

was telling me. Yeah. So it's like, and he was like, he was a fucking soldier and he was like, we dropped it because, you know, it's like, you know, we were at war with them and we didn't want to lose any more boys. Do you know how many boys we would have lost if we had to invade Japan and fight on the ground? It's like, you save American lives.

They never really fought in mainland Japan, right? They never went into Tokyo. No. That was the plan though. They would have had no choice. They would have had to do that. Well, that's what they say, but then there's these other historians say that they were going to capitulate. Like Japan was getting really destroyed.

Japan would, they, Japan just had to. They never surrendered Japan. But Japan, and can you research this real good? I think Japan's condition was that they could keep their emperor. They wanted to save face. You know, they had this pride fucking prideful culture thing that they have. This, this warrior. So the US would have said, yeah, you can keep your emperor. No, the U.S. was saying, no, you can't.

But some historians are saying like if the United States just said you can keep your emperor, it would have been over. Is that true? Yeah, the emperor clause. Yeah, the emperor clause. So that's what they wanted, right? So Japan wanted to keep their emperor. Why do they want them? Who cares about the emperor? Because they're fucking

the same thing. Why? When he got captured, he's like, kill? Because they're fucking. I mean, it's the same thing. Why? When he got captured, he's like, kill me. They have their brainwashed. It's the same thing. What, you know, religion does. Any paramilitary troop does. You know, it's like that's that's your pride. That's your that's what you're taught.

That's what you're told. So. Right. They wanted to keep their dumb emperor. They wanted to keep their system or whatever. And the United States was like, fuck you. Anyway, the war ended. We won. We went and rebuilt their country.

We called the Marshall Plan and we gave them baseball. So Ichiro Suzuki would not exist if it wasn't for World War II. Yeah, and Mike's favorite thing, anime, wouldn't exist either. It wouldn't, yeah. Are you a big fan of anime? Not so much anymore, but I was. Because you guys are both

invaluable to this podcast. We're happy to have you. How happy are we to have Mike on this podcast? Absolutely. I'm happy to have Mike. Happy to have Isis. Happy to have Vanity who will get cleaned. She's, she's definitely listened to that and she just went word,

word and giggled in Greece. Yeah. That girl says word and dope. Word, word, dope. And that's why I said it. Cause I was hoping to get a Vanity.

She's sweet as Reese's pieces, but you know what? No, let me tell you, you want to be valuable. She's invaluable. She's invaluable. Yeah? She's invaluable. She's truly invaluable. Her work has been fantastic. It's been dope and mad lit.

My favorite part is her critique of Mike's cuties with smoothies designs. How she just didn't even hesitate. She was like, it's kind of like anime. And that really hurt Mike. I like the way she did it. She paused. Make no mistake, Mike was making her an anime gift. Yes, he was.

In his basement, his computer. He wanted to give her an anime thing. If you don't think for one second that Mike has already drawn Venetia into an anime and spanked his monkey to it a few times, you got another thing coming. So it's just what it is. It's just what it is. Yeah. And I like the way she said it, too. She was like, she took a pause.

She said, how am I going to handle this? And she went, I think, do you guys love it? And we were like, we waited. We were like, I don't know. And she was like, I think we should all love it. Yeah. And I'm not sure if I love it. It's cool. Don't get me wrong. It's cool. Yeah. But it's not word dope loving. And then she

apologized for about an hour. Yeah, she did apologize. That's where Mike started. He's like, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. So, yeah. It's what it is. Anyway, my new website is up, cuz. Oh, yeah, cuz you got a fan to do it. Yeah. Thank you, Tony Cassis. I think she's great.

I think so. She's a fan of ours. Can they do the history hyenas one? She's going to do the history hyenas. We gotta figure out who owns that website, guys. Anyway, I should be saying that on of ours. Can they do the history hyenas? She's going to do the history hyenas. We got to figure out who owns that website, guys. Anyway, I should be saying that on the podcast. Can you tackle it out? Can you tackle this part out? I mean, we're going to have cackles all over the place.

Let me just let me just read. Can I lead? Can I read the newest patron members? Sure. Yeah. Yeah. The newest. These are the new because you're a sexy piece of ass.

I want to crawl in your lap. Yeah. Get in here. The the the the newest members of our patron went to patron dot com lap yeah get in here the the um the uh the newest members of our patreon went to patreon.com slash bay ridge boys first guy up brandon smith second josephine brandon smith no i mean he's just you think so i thought it's about either that or the whitest kid of brandon smith but there's some there's some uh not means who are black brandon right yeah okay um okay again we encourage you guys to make funny names.

If you want to just put your regular name, that's fine. But if you make funny names, it's just really good. Don't bore us to death, please. Okay. Next up, Josephine Green Book. Kind of woke, but lit. She's a- Funny.

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. She's great. Claire, once a toot, always a toot towel. Yeah. There you go. She's good.

Yeah. Then we got Zach, not a muzzy musgrove. Yeah. Then we got Andrea Santana, who just got a hot fucking Latina name. Then we got Alyssa, a piece of urine current. Yeah.

Alyssa, yeah. George Amos. Gosh, George Amos? George Amos. Yeah, what's up, Georgie? Then we got Greggy No Fumes. Greggy No Fumes. That could be top. He's top notch for me right now. Then. George Amos. George Amos. Yeah. What's up, Georgie? Then we got Greggy No Fumes. Greggy No Fumes. That could be top. He's top notch for me right now. Then we got Frank Martinez.

Frank Martinez. Que pasa, mi gente? Then we got Julian Kiwan, a.k.a. Closet Finook with a cock. What was the other one before that I liked? Greggy No Fumes. Yeah. Greggy No Fumes Yeah Greggy No Fumes Is nice and clean And simple and funny

Yeah Then we got One named Colin Colin what's up Yeah it's fucking We got the red fucking sticks We got the blue fucking sticks Watch my special

Fucking CNN Fucking shit Fucking shit And then we got This girl sounds like She's the enemy Naomi Morimoto Thank you for

No thank you for your service We love all people Listen Listen, we're just kidding. Part of the podcast is us to just go fucking wild. So we're just joking around. Thank you so much for your service. Naomi Morimoto. What's the real last name though? Morimoto. Morimoto. She's a Japanese. Yeah. Elena Santiago.

Sounds like she'll get fucking clean. Que pasa mi gente? Cassandra Dion Artistry. Hi. Hi. I have a problem with the last podcast. You guys got a little fucking out of line. Yes.

Then we got Michael Labine. Michael Labine. That kid's got a long sphincter. Yeah. Then we got Billy Batgate. Billy Batgate. How you doing, Billy? And then we got, last but not least, this may be the TVG nominee. We got

Alan, My Wife Doesn't Like My Feet Fumes Benson. I think he just took it from Sassoon Fumes. Sassoon Fumes from another one I love. The other guy, what was this guy, Georgie Webb? Greggy No Fumes. Greggy No Fumes is funny, but Sassoon Fumes? Sassoon Fumes? Yeah.

I think he gets that simple fumes at PPW and I think we give it to the last one. Yeah. PPW. Thank you guys so much for going to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Now Giannis Pappas finally has his website up. It's giannispappascomedy.com You can check all my dates out at

chrisdcomedy.com. I got a lot of things coming up in the summer. Nashville, Nantucket, Chicago, Vegas. So please come out, support us. And yeah, what do you got coming up, Gianni? Yeahville nantucket chicago vegas so please come out support us and yeah what do you got coming up yanni yeah um i'm gonna be in san antonio that's gonna go on the website they're on the website go to yannis pappas comedy.com rhode island fairfield atlantic city mohegan sun i'm getting the dates all up there now and they're flying in. So go to yannaspapascomedy.com. But listen, most importantly, patreon.com slash bayridgeboys.

There's over 100 episodes to binge at this point. You know what you get. We're constantly evolving it. When you join patreon.com slash bayridgeboys, you're supporting your favorite podcast. And the more we get, the more members we get, the more we focus on this podcast. You guys produce us directly. We go wild for you. We do this podcast for you and you only.

So we really love your support. Go check out our tiers and all the content you get by joining Patreon dot com slash Bay Ridge Boys. Yeah. dot com slash Bay Ridge boys. Yeah. Get our shirts at on the volley apparel dot com slash history hyenas. The links are on our YouTube.

Follow us on YouTube. Follow us on Instagram and go get your shirts. We got witch hazel shirts. We got fucking no fumes. We got cocoa. And what the fuck's that on the left? That's not ours. So we go get those are the three shirts we have up on on the apparel. We're also getting another shirt coming on on the apparel. Yeah. And once can

we just get a love that I mean his website and then people could just get the shirt on the website. Well, that's what Tony Cassis. Thank you very much. Hit her up if you want to get your website done, I guess. But she said we she didn't even she said, don't you have to plug me? She just loves the podcast so much. She wants to do our website. And then we

have our Teespring store. Teespring dot com slash history hyenas. That's simple. She just loves the podcast so much. She wants to do our website. And then we have our Teespring store. Teespring.com slash History Hyenas. That's simple. So just go to Teespring.com slash History Hyenas and buy your shirts, wear them. We got shirts coming. Soon we're going to have shirts at our shows. And look, we're getting bigger. What about...

Okay. So pretty soon me and Chrissy are going to be going on the road. Pretty soon we're going to be doing our live first podcast and it's going to get fucking wild. Most importantly, tell your friends about History Hyenas. Post it in your stories. Tweet about it. It helps and we love it. Thank you so much. Okay, we're going to do one phone call. I actually think we should change that t-shirt to

It's just what it is. That's more our thing. It's what it is. It's what it is is what we say. It's what it is is what it is. Let's call this people. Okay, let's call it. Who are we calling? This guy's in Jersey? Jillian.

God. What happened? I got a spot. time. God. What happened? I got a spot. I forgot. You're going to cancel? Maybe. Hi, this is Jillian. Hey, Jillian, what's up? This is Chris Estefano and Giannis Poppets from the History Guy.

How are you doing? Yeah, no, I got a situation with the mother and she's dating a new guy now and I'm saying publicly it doesn't affect me, but it really hurts. You know what? These things happen and they happen for a reason. So you just keep on chugging and doing your thing. So it's OK.

She's getting cleaned out on the bed I bought. That is not OK. It's just what it is. It's totally OK. It's it's just what it is. Yeah. No. So what are you doing?

Flicking your beam? What's going on? I'm at work right now. Oh, um, what are you doing? Flicking your beam? What's going on? Um, I'm at work right now. Oh, not. Where do you work? I work for Nike. Oh, wow. You work for Nike? Can you get us some shoes? Yeah. Can you get us some discount on some shoes?

Yeah, well, I work for Nike Children's Wear, so. Oh, so it's the baby. I got stuff for the baby. Yeah, for the baby. Listen, the baby really likes to wear Air Max, so if you could get some air marks for the baby for her to stomp around in, that would be very appreciated. Where do you work, Jillian?

Like in the city and in New York City? Yeah, I work in Manhattan. Oh, wow. So you're close. Yeah. So we're so close. So have you ever come and seen me or Giannis perform live? I have. I actually saw you guys last month with Schultz and Tim Dillon. Oh, yeah.

You came to the military show. That was a great show. I saw you guys in the bar before we went in. Oh, yes. I know who Jillian is. Hi. You're a piece. You're a piece.

Thanks, guys. You're welcome. Yeah. Are you single, girl? Yeah, I know who Jillian is. Hi. You're a piece. Thanks, guys. You're welcome. Are you single, girl? Yeah, I'm single. Chrissy, we almost met up a few times. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay. That's what it is. Yeah, he remembered. He just said, oh, yeah, he remembers.

Oh, he remembered. Yeah. So you got a couple of eggplant emojis in a remote dick pic of course I did what else did I get it's what it is it's just how it works

yeah it's just how it works it's what it is it's what it is yeah yeah so what's been your favorite moment of the podcast oh my favorite

moment of the podcast well I just listened to the alien episode with Serge and that was wild yeah right but did you how was Serge that was moment of the podcast. I just listened to the Alien episode with Serge and that was wild. How was Serge? I want to talk about the Queen episode.

When you talk about all the queens, those are good ones. Oh, the queens, yeah. Because we support all women. We're fucking Yas Queens or something. Serge is great, right? The fans love Serge. How great is Serge? He's great. I love him. Yeah. What's your Instagram?

Chrissy wants to know what your Instagram is so he can go check his DMs and brush up for the test. Instagram A-O-Joe A-Y-Y-O-O Joe. Oh, yes. Yeah, now I got it. Yeah.

I told you guys to do an episode on Son of Sam because my aunt was killed by him. What? Yeah. What? Oh my, hold on. Two things. First off, we just gave your Instagram on the air.

Is that okay? We can cackle it out if you don't want to. No, don't cackle it out. I want a little follower. Okay, it's fine. So she's fine. Holy fucking shit. Okay, we're going to do Son of Sam and we're going to

call you to talk about this. Oh my God, amazing. Call me, invite me into the studio, whatever you want. Is this true? Are you telling me what's your aunt's name? Yeah. What's your name? We'll talk later. We'll talk later. Yeah, we'll talk later. We'll talk later. Okay, okay'll talk later. We'll talk later.

Okay, okay. Well, thank you for being a $25 member. We really appreciate it. It's so nice to call you. Chrissy just said, oh, yeah, I remember he told me about you a bunch of times. So, he said he thought maybe he was

falling in love, but then he had a situation. So... We all got a situation with the mother. It's fine. He had a little bit of a situation with the mother, and then he went overseas, and he had to get in a plane and all those things. Yeah, yeah. DM me today. Yeah.

Okay. Get right back to me. Yeah. And thank you for your service, Jillian. We're going to call you. We will talk again about this when we do Son of Sam, because that is fucking wild. Wild. All right. Thanks, girl. All right. Let me know. All right. See you later. Later, Jillian. we're going to call you. We will talk again about this when we do Son of Sam because that is fucking wild. Wild. All right.

Thanks, girl. All right. Let me know. All right. See you later. Later, Jillian. Thanks, man. Wow.

She had an Aunt Eileen who got killed by Son of Sam. That's what happens. In Queens. So she's a New York girl. She's a New York kid. Yeah. All right. Well.

Is that all of it? That's it? Yeah. All right. What a nap, huh? Welcome back, Chris. Thank you so much. I'm sorry for most of it's going to be cackled,

but for the $25 members, it'll be fully up there. I guess it will. That was a wild one. That was a wild one. But for the five and 10 members of Patreon, you'll get the cackled version for the, for the non-tudes freebies, of course cackled,

but 25 will be uncackled. And let me just say this. Happy 4th of July, USA, USA, USA, USA. The boys. voice ស្រូវាប់បានប់បានប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប� Bye.