History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - 82 - Battle of Brooklyn was WILD!

Episode Date: August 4, 2019

The boys discuss the battle of Brooklyn... possibly again WILD! The cuzzies revisit the Battle of Brooklyn. Revolutionary war fans and patriots you don’t want to miss this. Chris loves the 1770’s and not just for the cute uniforms! Want more Hyena content? Check out www.patreon.com/bayridgeboys where things get really WILD!Follow us!: 🙆🏼‍♂️🐕🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏼‍♂️Chris Distefano on Instagram, Twitter, website🙆🏻‍♂️Yannis Pappas on Instagram, Twitter, website🐕History Hyenas on Instagram, Twitter, website Subscribe to the poddy woddy on YouTube, iTunes, Spotify, and HH Clips

What's up, cuzzy wuzzies? You're listening to the Bay Ridge Boys, History Hy up, everybody? Welcome to History Hyenas. It is Giannis Pappas. And again, we are History Hyena because unfortunately Chris is still on the road. I know some of you are getting a little mad, but don't worry. We got HeyBert, Sergio, and the Soccer Kid back, and also the girls from Noah Cupcakes. So we're going to have another

great episode. So everyone just sit tight and you're just going to enjoy another Christmas episode. And my DM message is blocked because I can't take any more messages about how angry you are about it. The faggot's back. Just kidding. I got my dick tucked back.

I'm going to suck some cock and use there. Can we get some Weishang Jing's please? Yeah. What's up baby? I mean, does he even work here anymore? Zach, you don't work here anymore.

I'm fucking back. I was out spreading the great news of the Fourth Reich. Yeah, Chris is back in town. I'm just kidding. I hate the Germans, but they do have nice unis. Yeah, that's the thing. He does like the unis in this. I will put it on Bay Ridge, patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys.

BRB text stories for our $25 members only because it's personal texts yeah i found some nice old photos of some yeah just out of nowhere i got a text of of of uh nazi uniform hugo boss nazi uniform and they were fucking cute they they are designed by a famous fashion designer can any other army say like like ralph lauren didn't design france's uniforms well that's the hypocrisy of the bullshit. It's like Hugo Boss designed the fucking Nazi uniforms, but nobody cares. People still buy Hugo Boss. BMW, Mercedes Benz supplied the tanks for

Hitler. So it's like, pick your fucking battles, folks. Fucking liberal Democrats. Pick your fucking battles. Trump 2020. Latter 14. I'm kidding. Latter 14. We had a situation with Ladder 14. There's been a couple of situations with the boys and girls at Ladder 14.

Yeah, it's just what it is. It's just a situation, and we just got to. What happened? Well, what happens is, you know. We just got to tread lightly, because if I say anything else, I'm going to throw it out the window. The thing is, Chris makes up so many things and he

goes wild and there's no boundaries in his mind. He makes things up and he just keeps going and eventually some things people are just going to be like, what are you talking about, Chris? Yeah, no, I know. What is the reason why I do that?

Why do I make so much shit up i think like i just lie all the time i used to think it was because you were a stone cold ff yeah then i canceled that out because you do like women i believe yeah i can't say you're straight i can't say you're not straight but i definitely can't say you're not gay i do love women but they have to they just they have to have men's feet and a really big clit that kind of looks like a dick yeah so i just can't rule that out so i used to think it was because you were stone cold ff right then i put that aside and then i said okay he's a stone cold psychopath yeah but then you cried to me on the phone a few times yeah right and i saw you sleeping

with teddy grams and and hopping and hopping inside the fucking beanie bag to sleep yeah and i said the love sack and i said ah, he's stone cold FF. So I went back to that. Yeah. But then I had to cancel that because I learned you're just depressed and shut off. Yeah. So you don't even think in your mind,

just go, I'm a fucking switched off kid. You're a switched off depressed kid. I'm finally depressed. And cause if it wasn't for my daughter, I may be jumping off the roof with Hey Bert. Hey Bert, he had a great time in Montreal. He made some great friends.

And Giannis had a nice call on who Hey Bert actually looks like. And it's been right under our nose and we've never sent it. It's Dr. Evil. Dr. Evil is who Hey Bert looks like. You know when you can never get Isis to chuckle? He's a 23 year old kid. He's a 23 year old kid. It's funny.

Yeah. Because he switched off. I mean, that kid is thinking of rhymes, beats, reading his fingers constantly. Absolutely. And guess who's back? It's Emojiface is back. And guess what I learned? The what? Say hello. Hey, what's up? Yeah. Hola. First of all, I can confirm Mike is a

good comic. I told you he was a good comic. I told you. So he'll just be when we start doing live podcasts, he'll just take Haybird's place. He'll just take Haybird's place and he'll do his shows and then and then if he doesn't get laughs we'll just squeeze him till he farts and then the crowd will laugh we're gonna we're gonna squeeze this kid till he farts because there's farts in there and that's just what it is we squeeze him out in the audience against some laughs and then you just bring us up you fart face fuck yeah we just want to squeeze my that's what we're gonna do at the show at the end as our

finale we're just gonna squeeze him till he farts like a whoopee cushion. That's what it is. Because he looks like a whoopee cushion. It's what it is. But yeah, so he's a great comic. And then he also said something very interesting about the people of San Antonio and applies to Mike. Yeah. Mike's in shape in San Antonio. In shape.

Because San Antonio, I think we've mentioned this already while you were gone. But like, I was a hot fucking kid in San Antonio. Well, no, but did you mention this? People were looking at me like I was Chrissy fucking D. Did you mention that they're all good looking in high school and then they tailor off? Because he was a fucking piece in high school. I did say that joke, I think, two episodes ago, that the only people who were in shape were 14.

Yeah, because. You have to be a child to be in shape there. The truth is, I don't listen to the podcast that I'm on. So if you thought I was going to listen to the ones that I'm not on, you got another thing coming. You got another thing. I don't listen to a goddamn thing. Yeah, because-

When people say, remember when you said that on that podcast, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. They're like, you have to know what I'm talking about. Stop playing hard to get. I said, I'm not, babe. Just put my balls in your mouth. Yeah, yeah.

You're a switched off kid. I'm a switched off kid. You live in the moment like a dog. Yeah. You live in the moment like a dog. And it has consequences. Yeah, me asking you if you remember what you said and how wild it is

and why would you make things like that up because you're going to get in trouble. It's almost like me asking a dog, why did you just chew my sock yesterday? Yeah. It has no idea because it's a fucking dog. You're switched off, kid. You're depressed. You're also still a stone cold FF. FF. Because make no

mistake because this is a history, Aina's. We are bound to do the same episode twice. It's going to happen. I think we're about this is History of Hyenas, we are bound to do the same episode twice. It's going to happen. I think we're about to do that today. Yeah, we're going to do Battle of Brooklyn today, and we think we may have done it already, but we're going to do it again. Guys, when we do our shows together in History of Hyenas, we're getting close because we're

getting big. Please go leave reviews on iTunes. But when we do it, Mike Mush is going to have to stand behind us with a net. Cause both of us are constantly almost passing out. He's going to have to stand behind us with a fucking fishermen's net. That's going to be his job. He's going to have to open up the show, do jokes.

We'll squeeze him till he farts. And then he just stands behind both of us with a net in case one of us passes out. You almost passed out in Providence. And I almost passed out every single day. Comedy central didn't buy history. Hyenas. I'm depressed.

And also we'll have at our live shows, I almost pass out every single day. Comedy Central didn't buy history. Hyenas. I'm depressed. And also we'll have at our live shows. We'll have Scrabble fingers. We will have to hide with the body who would be sitting up there with no turntables and no, no sound effects. Cause he would have forgotten about, he'll just go into the mic. Yeah.

And so he'd just be standing there when we say something wild and say, yeah. And then, and then, and then, yeah. And we say something wild and say weishengxian yeah and then the kid eats halal he's an ff2 we're all ffs and we're also gonna fucking we're also for $1000 patreon members for $1000 a month we'll kidnap

hey bert once a month for you guys and we'll wrap him up in a tarp and you can hit him with fucking batteries laughing laughing laughing you see and you can hit him with fucking batteries. You see, that's an example of you saying something that's extremely funny but extremely disturbing

and wild. And it really could hurt somebody. Look, the kid's from Ridgewood, Queens. He doesn't know how to fuck. He does not know how to live in a padded world. Sekiro got fucking throw-fucked by his friends and they did that because they liked them. It's what it is.

So he's been bullied because he was gay. He was bullied. Yeah. So what he's saying is, is a joke. You don't ever, ever do that to someone. We got some dumb kids listening to this. Why send us for a thousand dollar patron? I know, but it's still, people are laughing.

There's someone in their car laughing right now and they're going to go bully one of their friends and be like, I'm being just like Christie. Cause you're their idol. Cause make no mistake. The people who idolize you are hot girls and Franks and beans kids. Yeah. Franks and beans kids. Shout out.

Paulie Gassi. Cause it's just what happens on this podcast. You just, you have no limits cause you know who you are. Yeah. You ever see an astronaut floating in space and just swimming and stuff like that. And it looks like he's swimming, but you're going, why is he doing strokes? There's no water.

It's because there's no rules. There's no atmosphere. There's nothing to hold you back in space because you're an astronaut floating in space. Yeah. Cause it's just true what it is. I don't know. You know, listen, I'm sorry to anyone I've ever heard or offended. I'm just a kid. I make stories up. I have a deep, deep, deep rooted mental illness. I have a lot of problems that I need to start to go to therapy for. CBD is not working anymore. And I'm back on sweets. And even though I'm starting to get jacked, I'm back on sweets. Thank God you started to look jacked because you started to look like a Pez dispenser. Yeah. Don't get too skinny because your head's not going to trim down. I'm starting to get a little jacked out. You know what else the kid is doing? Yeah. Drinking a lot of brews.

The fridge is full of brews. My mom came over last night to watch the baby and I had all those fucking brews, empty bottles of brews. And she was like, do you ever have a house party here? And I was like, no, just me and Giannis came over

and we just threw a few back. And she was like, oh my goodness. I was like, yeah, he's been drinking a lot, but it's really me. Oh, you put it on me. I put it on you. You see, why would you do that? My mom didn't believe it.

She didn't believe it because I'm from Park Slope. The only reason why I did it is because at the present moment I'm taking a lot of heat from my family. So I had to move some off. I had to move some off and move it on to Yanni Papa. I'm going to eat a scone in this room and I don't care the guy that owns this place. You know who you are? If you have a problem with it, then why don't you meet me

at the corner of fucking Germany and the hike? Actually, it's Liz who gets mad at us. Look, it's Liz who gets mad at us. Look, it's Liz who gets mad at us. Oh, Liz? He doesn't care anyway. Can we get the fucking Wei Zhongxin button, please? He can't just say things like that without a Wei Zhongxin button. Or a character piece, yeah.

I gotta... Just say ladder 14. Ladder 14. I gotta talking to you about the cake, that's why. Are you really? By Liz? She was being serious. Yeah. What'd she say? Well, we didn't eat the cake. No, we didn't eat the cake,

but yeah, there was a, there apparently is an issue in the building. And so whenever there's a food issue, she gets yelled at. Yeah. And then I get yelled at. So I'm not supposed to be doing this.

But then you're not doing right now. Right. Yeah. I mean, you're not doing it right now. So it's what it is. I'm sorry, Liz.

I love you. Yeah. The people love you on the iTunes comments because you're a national treasure okay we we it can't be stopped he's like maniac cop

you're like maniac cop you ever seen a movie maniac cop he can't be stopped he can't be stopped he's like maniac cop you're like maniac cop you ever seen a movie maniac cop he can't be stopped or like the term you know the term that new version of Toyota you can't be stopped cuz it's what it is he can't be stopped are you happy I'm back

go listen to their podcast five joes and a sam what's it called what's it called? What's it called again? Keeping Joe? Yeah. What's it called? Yeah, Keeping Joe. It's a good podcast.

Phil Hanley doesn't know how to fill out a check. Is that what it's called? That's what it's called. No, no, they're very funny guys. What's it called though? I forget. Keeping Joe. Keeping Joe. It's a great podcast. It's actually a great podcast. I love it. I've done it many times. Phil Hanley, Sam Hall, Joe Mackey, Liz. Great. And they have a, what's his name? Colin.

Smith. Colin Smith, the guy that does the music. Yeah. Just, and. It's a good podcast. Listen to them. They're on Riotcast. We love them to death.

Yeah, they're our brothers and sisters over there. God, is Sam Orrell a good comic? Sam Orrell, yeah, he's a good comic. Yeah. You know, he's a nasally, but he's a good comic. Here's the thing. Sam's a good comic and he's a good friend he's and he loves sports and we're gonna do he's got a podcast that is starting with starburst yeah we're gonna do

and talk about sports yeah sam's a good good friend yeah he's a great and truly one of the best comics out right now he's so good so good um what was i about to say oh the new thing me and chris are doing now is we've fully discovered that just comedians do have functioning mental illnesses yes i'll just blow up a picture of one of our comedians, friends, faces and text you and just say full blown mental illness. And you can see it in people's faces. Yeah.

Even the best comics that you would think of. There's this is full blown mental illnesses. Yeah. That's why we're so easily manipulated and taken advantage of. Yeah. Because we're just special needs kids. Yeah. And anyone who throws us a chicken wing,

we're just happy to be accepted. It's what it is. Yeah. I've always been special needs kids. And anyone who throws us a chicken wing, we're just happy to be accepted. It's what it is. Yeah, I've always been special and weird. And this is the first career that's like ever really embraced me because of it. But make no mistake, it should be medicated. Yeah, I should be medicated and I should not be on the streets. I mean, let's be honest. Sam

Morell, if he didn't have comedy, he'd be staring at a wall reciting Knicks facts. It's what it is. That's what he'd be doing. 100%. Joe Mackey, it scares me to think about what he'd be doing. 100%. And Joe Mackey, it scares me to think about what he'd be doing without a stand-up comedy. Stand-up comedy saves his life. Yeah, what would he be doing, cuz? I mean, what would that kid

be doing? He'd be definitely scaring children. Parents would definitely be shuffling their kids away from him in Roy Rogers. Yeah, he'd be trying to make a joke at a kid in Roy Rogers, and a parent would just go like this and scoop their child away. Yeah. Yeah, he'd be a priest.

Even though he's a harmless kid. Yeah. But, you know, some. Yeah. Yeah. And Phil Hanley would just still be in Canada. Build a wall. Build a wall.

On top two. Yeah, build a northern wall. Because I was surprised to know there was a lot of Mexicans in Texas. What do you mean? That were just born there. They didn't climb over the wall. They didn't get thrown over the wall like Humpty Dumpty? No.

Yeah. Cuz if Mike Mush breathes heavy on your shoulder, are you going to catapult him right back over that wall? Yeah, right back over that wall. You might hurt your foot though, because he's a big kid. Yeah, cuz I think instead of the wall, we should just make like a huge, like 30 foot wide slingshot and just start fucking pulling them back and letting them fly. Yeah, cuz you know, most of the people did like our episodes but i got a very funny message uh for somebody was just angry and they were angry at me like it was my choice yeah because they would look on fans are the patreon messages that we were reading yesterday were laugh out loud 10 out of 10 about when we

posted pics of our moms yeah we're gonna we're gonna talk about those right now did we do those on a patreon episode or no did we talk about about the moms? Did we talk about the comments? No, no, no, no. You just posted those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's do it now. Cause we'll, let's talk about. Did you post our dance?

Not yet. Not yet. The next one. But this, this, this kid, this kid made me laugh because. Cause he's genuinely angry. This kid just had enough. Is it Patreon or is it iTunes? No, it's right on.

It's right on our, um, let me find it. This kid just had enough. He had, and I got another DM about how a kid is angry that you act like you don't like the pod. But that was weeks ago. No, I got a recent one. Yeah, but I, but what are you talking about? Because they think you're not here because you don't, you don't want to be here. Oh, some people just heard that on YouTube.

So got it. Okay. What do you mean? Heard what? Those episodes just came out on YouTube. Yeah. Cause somebody was asking about the Joey Kamasta episode. When is that going on?

Yeah. We're going to put that up. And let's put the Ben Kissel up. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, that was a snooze fest. You got to stop. You got to stop. Okay. Can someone put a little atmosphere in the room so this kid can put his feet on the ground? You're not floating in space. Because if you people listen to

this and then there's consequences. The only thing that can make me stop talking and stand at attention is the German national anthem. I mean, I mean, let's just just coming it's coming yeah please tell you guys what you have to understand oh yeah what you have to understand about our podcast is that when you guys tune in to this podcast for the next hour of your life while you're listening hour plus of your life reality is just a suggestion yeah so anything that i say or yana says or mike says or zach says it's just this is our reality you can't take what we say and bring it into the real world because for an hour you're escaping your own reality and you're coming into our suggested

reality listen and my suggested reality is the nazis won the war i'm just saying because the man in the high castle show'm kidding. Wei Shujing. Wei Shujing. I'm just saying because the man in the high castle show, it was a joke on that. I'm just kidding. Especially when-

I'm joking around. Yeah, especially when Chrissy talks because here's the thing. Chrissy just makes things up. Absolutely. He doesn't think about consequences. He just goes for the funny. We're a couple of kids in this podcast

who go for the funny and sometimes there's people who are listening to this and they say, they get mad because you're saying, why would you want people to believe that or somebody else who who might have dm'd chrissy or whatever and goes hey that sounds a lot like my story it's just he's just doing a character piece called ladder 14 and there is a there is a naiveness to me that you mean an evil yeah an evil not evil? Yeah. Navate. What do you say? Navate. Navate. You're like a special, you're, you're, you're, you're like, look, cause here's the deal.

What is it? With your looks, people look at you and go, this kid should be in an action movie. Right. This kid should be standing with Jason Statham. Right. You know, being the guy from Brooklyn, you should be the guy from Brooklyn with the rock. You should always be the rock's friend from Brooklyn. Right.

Going like, I know karate to, Rock, let's go. You know? Yeah. Let's do it. Yeah. I'm from Ridgewood and I know karate. Yeah. That should be you.

But when you were born, your head got squeezed a little bit. Yeah. So you're a tad bit for hunks and beans. You're an F&B incorporated kid. Yeah. So you ended up doing comedy. Right. Like I'm almost good looking.

You're almost the action hero. Right. You know what I mean? It's the good looking you're almost the action hero right you know what i mean it's the same almost there you take off your shirt and you're like almost but one tits just doing what it wants to do yeah one tits uncooperative with the other tits reality is just a suggestion for one of my tits and you got a lunch lady ass and when we had sergio on like he went on for three minutes about how alarmingly fat your ass is. And it was very funny. You got it. You got it.

And he also talked about your head. You're just a little disproportion. Yeah. But you're very, very funny. Yeah. But you're just not making it into action. You're just comedy. You're just comedy.

And that's I figured out why Sergio wears small hats because Puerto Ricans have small brains. Way song. She. I'm just kidding. And because your dad 100 percent looks like Bar and because your dad 100 looks like barney rubble it looks like barney rubble yeah and it's just yeah he's an ff so here's the deal so i did get a dm all right that's what i'm saying and by the way we're going to talk about the battle of brooklyn today the revolutionary war i know a lot about it it's fucking really exciting for us it's going to be a great episode like it's truly going to have a lot of history and a lot of fun. But let's just get let's just get, you know, through the other stuff that we have to do. I'm sorry to my family. And yeah, because I've been having a vulnerable time.

I may want to crawl in your lap. Yeah, because because I may need to get in your lap because I'm vulnerable. Yeah, because yeah, if you if you would say if you saw my phone, if one of the fans stole my phone, they would see on a Saturday night. I dialed I dialed Mrs. Poppins his phone number at 11 p.m. They said, oh, my God, Chris, you fucking scumbag rat. But it's not what you think it is. I called her to tell her husband passed out on stage in Providence. That's what I called her.

Yeah. I said, your husband just passed out on stage in Providence. I don't know what to do. And because I'm being honest, you want to be honest with you? Yeah, this is true. Yeah. On my kid. Yeah. I started to tear up a little bit you did when i called it yes i was holding back tears because i didn't know what happened to you you thought i was down i thought you were down and britney she your wife mrs poppins was fine she was holding it

together better than i could but i was starting to tear up a little bit while i was ironing my shirt because yeah from what i understand you also feel like you have many times where you felt like you were gonna pass out yes am i catching it from you or are we just too anxious? FFs. We're too anxious. FFs. I think that the problem I've said. All right, let's get to it first.

Let's I just want to get to that first because we're all over the place. So we'll talk. We'll do this and then we'll talk about we'll talk about passing out and then we'll get to the Battle of Brooklyn, which we already did. Yeah. I'm pretty sure we already did. But I read a book 1776 and I've been reading on a plane like an ff and i just got a lot of information yeah okay so this kid gods of night hilarious he just he had enough of christian polanco yeah i agree yeah and zach zach was supposed to name that episode equal pay as wild because we're trying to hop on that

bandwagon but he nicknamed it soccercer is Wild nobody gives a shit about soccer but all we talked about was Equal Pay is there any way we can change that name to Equal Pay or is it just what it is now we can you can? did you see the Equal Pay that they tweeted out a statement today

yeah that they make less that they actually make less it's all mom mentality bullshit let's get that episode up on um youtunes now so we could check you know we're just trying to be screwed in yeah just try to be screwed and get it up and if you could just edit out polanco that'd be great yeah if you could just edit out christopher long he's a nice kid but the kids the kids not that entertaining why don't you just any time anytime he talks just why don't you just put the fucking why don't you just put a lullaby over it because it puts everybody to sleep because you're just gonna every time you're gonna see somebody in real life they're gonna be like i

listen to your as we keep getting bigger they're gonna say i listen to your podcast you said some things about me and you just it's your charm's not gonna work on everybody it's starting to fade away as i get older because i'm not as good looking as i used to be so it's starting to fade a little bit but but if Polanco says anything, I'll stick his head in a fucking pencil sharpener. Okay, so this kid, and it just caught me really, this is really funny. His gods of night. He just goes, I'd rather listen to Kimmy K, Kimmy Kardashian, because of that post I did. Sure, it was a fucking piece.

Yeah. Then that unfunny soccer fuck that was on the last pod. No more cast without Chris. Stop the madness, Giannis. Yeah. You know, he got mad at me. He got mad at you. Because he got mad at me for Christian Polanco.

That's why I want to go track Christian Polanco down and be like, do you understand you made a fan mad at me? Yeah. For how entertaining you are? Well, that's what I said. When I saw, because I saw when you guys posted the new episode up of Christian Polanco, I said, what is this guy running a fucking daycare? Get him off the pod.

Well, though, he came in with Elvis. We had our t-shirt guy here. Yeah. And we actually did a pretty, we had actually a pretty interesting conversation about equal pay. So if you're into that, check it out. That'll be up because we're screwed and we're trying to, we're going to try to piggyback off of that controversy. But look, real quick, real quick, real quick. People can go to history

hyenas.com, right? History hyenas.com for all our information. You can get our Patreon there. People can go to HistoryHijenas.com, right? Yeah! HistoryHijenas.com for all our information. You can get our Patreon there. You can get our merchandise there. You guys want t-shirts? HistoryHijenas.com! Now let's get the gay out!

Yeah! Yeah! Come on, Zachy! Yeah! Yeah! Not too good. Guys, that's not good for your street cred. Also, patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys, as always. But historyhyenas.com, that's where we're driving the traffic.

Can they get our Patreon from here? You can get everything from History Hyenas. If you have any questions or want anything, go to historyhyenas.com. T-shirts, T-shirts, T-shirts. T-shirts, all our merch is up there. All the links are up there. You can follow everything. You can even follow our hashtags, T-shirts, T-shirts. T-shirts. All our merch is up there. All the links are up there. You can follow everything. You can even follow our hashtags.

History, Hyena, Fact of the Day, HHFOD, Cuties with Smoothies, hashtag. Keep tagging us in Cuties with Smoothies. And you have to join our Patreon.com slash Bay Ridge Boys because guess what? We're about to start going live on the lens. Yeah. Because I just realized they have a live function. Yeah, we can do that. Me and Chrissy are going to go live for the $25 members.

And that's what we can do for the $20. Can you please squeeze Mike Mush right now? I want to see if a fart comes out. Yeah, he's like, it won't be because you cuss. Yeah, absolutely. We're going to go live on the lens and for those $1,000 members, we'll show you what we mean when we beat fucking Hey Bird. No, no, no. It's not funny. It's not funny. Yeah, that's not funny.

No? No, you can't talk. Yeah. Even Mike. But look at Mike Mush, even. And he's just tell me just he doesn't care about his ex-wife. He's a stone cold killer. He went and stayed at his ex-wife's house. He used her for free rent.

What about for a thousand dollars a month? We just a fan can rub some peanut butter on him. I know. On Haybird. Because he's allergic to peanut butter. Yeah, I was just kidding. Yeah, guys. Haybird is a brother to me. I know. Genuinely like a brother. And you know what's funny? I like you. He's only to peanut butter. Yeah, I was just kidding. Yeah, guys. Hey, Burns is a brother to me.

I know. Genuinely like a brother. And you know what's funny? He's totally mad at me. And you say horrible things. Yeah, but I'm always like, Bubba, you know I love you, baby. And I kiss him on his forehead a little bit

and let him sit in my lap. I know, because it's because you're Chrissy D. I'm Chrissy Charms. But it's wearing off because I'm not as good looking as I used to be. So it's wearing off. You're still good, cuz, but make them see.

Welcome to my world. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause Mike was good looking and fucking high school. Cause if I, when I saw the picture of Mike mush in high school, I said, he'll get fucking Kevin Spacey right now. You'll crawl right into that fucking little uncircumcised.

Yeah. A little Mexican lap kids in American, which was surprising to me. I met like three Mexicans who just like are like, have been living in America for generations. Yeah, they're mad. I didn't know that about Texas. By the way, our fans caught a picture of Zach Isis and make no mistakes.

The girls went wild. Listen, our podcast is three pieces and one kid who used to be a piece before he discovered barbecue. It's what it is. But we are. But he's still. This is the thing where you make it. You know, you know how much trouble. Yeah.

Yeah. Now I'm fucked. I i was joking around it's not true like you're doing your own fucking family i'm the one who does it yeah i mean what's wrong with you i'm the one who jerks you're a fucking rascal yeah yeah i'm a rascal yeah yeah it's you know mike musham is fucking jerking off to that yeah exactly that's why i said it's just fucking kidding. Do we need a cackle there? My wife is a fan of our podcast. She has to know I'm kidding. Mrs. Poppins, do you know he's fucking kidding? I made a video two days ago saying I was going to go buy you cigarettes. I'm kidding. Yeah, you're a fucking asshole is what you are.

I'm starting to think you're just an asshole. Yeah. Yeah. No, cuz, listen. No, no, no. You can't keep getting away with things just because you got a charm. Because make them, well, listen, do it and do it now. Yeah.

If you have it in your system and you want to be a rascal and you want to be a stone cold fucking FF. Yeah. Is there anything funnier than calling somebody a stone cold? Yeah. Number one. Do it now because we all know what's going to happen once you hit 45. You're falling right into a Flintstone. Yeah.

Because your genetic code is shaped like a box it's what it is cuz your dad looks like barney rubble yeah cuz hey listen to this podcast i'm sorry mr. de stefano yeah it's what it is yeah um anyway we both passed that we we both have so here so first i want to say

i i feel okay today thank god it's a wild thing that happened to me um i've been going for three weeks straight. I didn't take a day off. Andrew Schultz keeps postponing the special thing, so it's giving me heart. That's a fucking monster. So the special will be coming out soon, whatever.

But what happened was there were some people who came out Fairfield Thursday night. I think I performed a little bit too much on that show I was having a great time I did two full hours and it was fun and I had a high energy performance and then I went and I drove back to Verzi's house and this is after every night

having something and of course all the family stuff I got going on which is tons of stuff so I went back to Verzi's we had a few pops nothing crazy smoked a cigar went to to Verzi's. We had a few pops, nothing crazy. Smoked a cigar, went to bed, slept seemingly fine, but then had breakfast, left a little later. You know, it was hot out. I was driving four hours in traffic with the sunroof open straight to like six thirty seven. I had no time to grab something to eat. I got in the shower, went straight to the

club. I hadn't eaten. And apparently I was severely dehydrated. Yeah. You said you were telling me that your pee was brown. Yeah. It was like yellow. And I just went, I, you know, I, I drank like a bottle of water before the show, but I guess it doesn't work that quick. Um, and I hadn't eaten. So I felt low energy. Right. I felt myself. I felt that way before, you know, and I've been like, I felt that way sometimes on second shows. Remember I jumped early in San Antonio. So I'm starting to learn harsh lessons. Like, first of all and I've been like, I felt that way sometimes on second shows. Remember I jumped early in San Antonio. So I'm starting to learn harsh lessons. Like first of all, I got a lot of stress and anxiety going on right now with my family and stuff like that.

And I'm not working. I'm not taking care of myself because the doctor told me I'm like, I'm taking care of everyone else. Thinking about my doctor's appointments, worrying about my parents, taking them. I'm not taking care of myself at all. She's like, who's your primary care doctor? I was like, I don't even have one. I don't even think about my own health at this point.

Yeah. You were going to, you were going to City MDs in enemy territory. Yeah, well, that was two years ago. That was the last time I was a doctor. Over two years ago. So, I felt like low energy. I felt that I went fuck. And I was like, should I try to eat something quick? But at that point, it was just, you know,

I was talking to people and I was like, I'll be fine. It's only one show tonight. That's what I said to myself. I'll be fine. Right. And, uh, and then it was a little nervousness like, damn, I'm feeling low energy. Right. Maybe I should eat something. And, um, I just didn't. So it happened quick. I got called up on stage. As soon as I got on stage, it was like, boom, I got hit hard with like the lightheaded. I like, I stood up and I was like, fuck. I said like one thing and I was like. You can come back right now. Hi, we're back. Yeah.

So I was just depressed and I did the whole weekend like that. So I sat down and I said, all right, I can get through this sitting down or I'll sit down until it feels better. But meanwhile, when you're thinking when your head someplace else and you got. I really realized what we do is kind of a high stress thing. Absolutely. Especially because there was a lot of fans who came out. Sure. So thank you to all the history hyena fans and otherwise that came out.

There was a lot of history. A lot of pressure. So you're like, all right, I want to do a good show, you know, cause there's a lot of fans there. Um,

and then it just, it, it felt like I was going to go down and it came hard. Like, Oh shit, I'm going to faint. So I was just like, let me not faint.

Let me call the host back on. And in my mind quickly, I'm going like, I'll just go grab a chicken finger, come back up, oh shit, I'm going to faint. So I was just like, let me not faint. Let me call the host back on. And in my mind quickly, I'm going like, I'll just go grab a chicken finger, come back up, you know, let the host kill a couple more times. This will pass. And I went and I didn't know how thirsty I was because I ended up banging like six waters. Right. And every time I banged the water, it didn't feel like I was done being thirsty. So obviously driving with the sunroof down and sweating the whole time for four hours

is not the right move to do. So anyway, they called an ambulance. I called out in a stretch i went to the hospital we canceled the whole weekend i'm very sorry um i was a little overtired i think i overworked it chris is a medical professional and he told me all the details of it he can give you a better idea he just basically gave a diagnosis that i'm a stone called F. Yeah, that's what the diagnosis was. I think I explained to him this way. When you see when you watch when you watch the show Chernobyl, OK, it'll make sense in a second. When you watch the show Chernobyl, you realize what they say is that, yes, glaciers are melting at an exceptionally fast pace. Certain cities will be underwater. That is because of cow farts. That is

because of the holes in the ozone layer. That is because of aerosol spray cans. That is because we're using too much energy. But the main thing, the main thing is Chernobyl releasing 100,000 times the radiation of a nuclear bomb in Hiroshima into the atmosphere.

That is what is causing the most of this. What I said to you is what reign causing the most of this what I said to you is what reigns true and I'm being serious absolutely you have you have things going on with your family you have career things you have getting older things you have you're not eating all these things are adding to your anxiety but what caused you to pass out your Chernobyl is the fact that all you do all day is push on the fact that you're an FF. Yeah. So if you would just come out and say, I embrace it.

Yeah. I want to fucking throw in a onesie like Joey Camasta. You would have the most energy you've ever had on stage. Yeah. Because the truth is, that's what it is. Because for our thousand dollar level. Send me a picture of your brother and your dad and all I saw was two homos. Yeah. What we're going to do for our $1,000 member is because from what I understand,

Sergio told me, because Sergio texted me too. A lot of friends texted me and I appreciate all the people who reached out. No, yeah. No, we were honestly truly concerned. Yeah. But he told me also when he's been on the road with you, he's been concerned about you because you've also felt, he said, he told me, he's like, you get a little faint, like you seem like a little winded in past that too.

And then I get second rooms, but I still stay in his room. Yeah. So you also experienced this where you feel like you get faint on stage? I felt, well, well. So we're just two kids who are stone cold FFs and pushing it down? Yeah. That, well, I remember in Boston. I think that's our biggest problem.

I remember in Boston, I headlined three shows. And then I remember I had, I headlined three shows and I also cracked open three girls in the same day. then I remember I had a headline three shows and I also cracked open three girls in the same day. So I remember I... Ladder 14, if anything you're hearing here sounds familiar or sounds like it could be part of your life or something similar to the story or the life that you lived, it's a character piece.

My name is Patty Mulroney and that's my friend Sean Terry. I'm Sean Terry and that's Patty Mulroney. I forgot who I was. We're a couple of firefighters who happened to lean right. Anyway, continue with the story character piece. Ladder 14. Scene.

Yeah, so I cracked open a fucking couple of nice, you know, Southie fucking scumbag girls. If you hear anything that sounds derogatory about your person and it sounds familiar to your story, it's a character piece. Yeah, that's, I'm Sean Mulroney and that's Patty Flyball. Lap 14. Lap 14. I'm rock hard for summer.

So yeah, so I hooked up a little bit with three girls. Yeah, just keep it general. I hooked up with three girls and I may have gotten blowed from a fourth. True story. And then I did three shows, three headlining shows. You just don't remember if you got a blow. I don't remember do you know that mike emoji remembers every blue he's got him written in his diary yeah yeah and you can't even remember if you got one on a weekend yeah i don't know a weekend that stands out because you were in a city yeah i don't know

so so i did the three shows and same thing the the the first show was at five o'clock or six o'clock then it was an eight o'clock and a 10 o'clock and same thing packed with fans. The hyena fans came out. Thank you guys so much. That third show, 20 minutes into that show, I started grabbing for the mic stand. I asked if somebody could bring me a water,

looking out at the people, feeling, you know, all the effects of what I had done that day. I had thrown hands. I'd been up early, you know, cracking people open.

I'm drinking wines. You sent about a million DMS to send all the million dms to respond to my dudes yeah the dog's probably texting you saying he said something too close to a netflix executive that can affect yeah yeah he doesn't have i i thought i could sleep in but i i can't because i got to take my baby mama's new boyfriend's mother to the hospital like i you know i gotta get home and he wants to be in a bay rich boys episode the bay rich boys episode he said he likes what we're doing so so he wants to be so he yeah so that's. He wants to be in a Bay Ridge Boys episode. He said he likes what we're doing. So he wants to be... So he... Yeah. So that's another situation.

I think we need to cackle there. Do we? I mean... Or is she like past... She doesn't like check in to yell at you anymore, right? I mean... He did say he wants to be in a Bay Ridge Boys episode, right? No, but he... Yeah. Yeah. No. Maybe we should cackle. We're not saying names. Who fucking knows? Who cares?

Yeah. Yeah. Don't cackle. Nobody's saying it. Where are we marked? We definitely need to cackle. We're not saying names. Who fucking knows? Who cares? Yeah. Yeah. Don't cackle. Nobody's saying where we definitely need to cackle. I'm making everything up and maybe we should cackle. Should we cackle? Well, we got to cackle the yeah. Yeah. Cackle that too. Should we cackle the we should cackle the other thing too. I mean, you want to just

cackle this whole fucking podcast. Yeah. I mean, I want to cackle you cuz. Yeah. If I could just throw a fucking squiggle cackle over you, I'd do it. Yeah. It's the Trump thing. It's only me. There's too many wild things. We can't pin one down.

Yeah. When you were saying yesterday, should we erase the thing? I go, from where, cuz? You said it on every episode. You said it on every episode, cuz. You've made that joke that isn't true on every episode. It's what it is. So your family's mad at you, and we can't stop it. Yeah. We can't erase the podcast episode. It's what it is. So your family's mad at you and we can't stop it.

Yeah. We can't erase the podcast now. It's on Spotify. It's on all these platforms. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Yeah. Because we just need to just put up,

you need to get a Wei Shangxin tattoo on your face and dick. Yeah, that's what it is. You don't mean anything. Wei Shangxin on my face and dick. Because you're too wild for this world. I'm being honest with you. Yeah, because. And what happened when we started this podcast and we called it History Hyenas,

it just opened up the FF in you. And you're just singing and dancing in the rain too much. You're too free. We need one of the Mulroney brothers to come back here and fucking discipline you and screw you back in. You need to be screwed back in. Cuz, let's, should we talk about Battle of Brooklyn? I don't know, cuz. Where do we start off? You were just finishing up about how you were going to pass out in Boston. Oh let's, should we talk about battle of Brooklyn? I don't know. Cause when we start off,

you were just finishing up about how you were going to pass out in Boston. I was going to pass. What did you do? And then 20 minutes into the set, I was like, I need a water to the stage. You want a water? I need a water.

Did you say it like that? Can I get a water? I said, can I get a water? Shout out Smithtown water. Shout out Smithtown water department. And I said, here's your water kid.

Cause we were in Boston. Here's your fucking water. Here's your fucking water. You want a water? water no i'm good so um so and i just plowed through i remember just plowing through but it was really fucking hard to plow through but i did it but if that would have happened to me at minute one the only reason i plowed through is because i was already 20 minutes in so i was like just do another 20 if i would have told you yannis just do 20 minutes right you like i remember at houston improv i don't know if sergio ever told you this one i got food poisoning right before our shows we had an eight o'clock and a ten o'clock the eight o'clock i felt so

fucking sick to my stomach that i went on stage with a garbage pail then the second show i was like i can't do this show i actually can't i'm in so much i'm nauseous i'm woozy i i i'm so fucked up right now like i can't do the show the impending uh anxiety of having to do a 10 o'clock show after what i just went to at the eight o'clock like i barely got through it i can't do 45 minutes so the owner thank god the owner was there nicest guy or the club manager he was like if you want just because there's people here why don't you go out first do as much time as you can if it's five minutes five minutes then we'll have Sergio and there was the emcee there they'll fill the time

and once he said that and allow and said and kind of got me mentally out of the 45 minute space I said you know what why don't you have them go up to as long as they want sergio did 30 the mc did 30 so they're already an hour into the show i'll just i'm just on the hook for half an hour he said that's fine because he was giving me no pressure and then when i got on stage because he had taken all the pressure away i did 45 minutes and i just got through it i just did 45 minutes yeah so it was for the pressure the impending anxiety of not only do not feel good, but now I have to do 60 minutes. Right. So if you would have felt that at 30, you would have been able to plow through and just got off at 45. Because it was the first minute you felt it. You were like, I can't.

I, I totally understand. And you got taken out on a stretcher. Yeah, I got taken out on a stretcher, which is embarrassing. They gave me a standing ovation like I was Vince Carter. I broke my ankle on a basketball court. It's what it is. Yeah, it was a little weird. And then some Greek guy handed me an icon. Yeah. So, which made me even, like, am I dying? Like, is this what it's going to be? Yeah.

So, but seriously, I posted something. In all seriousness, look, mental health needs to be spoken about a little bit more. And also, I've realized our career is like, you got to take care of yourself, you know, especially as you age. You got to hydrate. You got to rest. Absolutely. You have to. It's a it's a sport. It's a necessity. It's a sport. It's a high pressure situation where you're supposed to get less every couple seconds. Comparing it, you know, in no ways it has physically. It's totally different things.

But like every athlete like LeBron James just has to sit in an ice bath now. You know, guys go into the Joe Rogan's going going into the you know oxygen deprivation tank like this this is all these are all part you have to put your body first you have to now yeah you know or else things like this happen especially when you have a lot of other stress right you know because you have an actual family you're running a family you have all these all my family members you know all my close members have health issues yeah most of our comedians the only time our comedian most of our friends ever get bent out of shape is they lose a fucking action figure. You know? Yeah.

So it's like, we have real shit to worry about here. Yeah, that's the truth. You especially. Yeah, so apologies, but look, man, a lot of people came forward. You got some new shoes though. Yeah, I got some nice new shoes. But the people who came through on the Instagram and said they were going through something and they were glad that I spoke out.

It's like, yeah, it made me feel a lot better. So maybe speaking about is what you got to do. It was nice. Don't try to hold it in. Cause I told you, I told you to post that message and I meant it,

but it was really nice to see a lot of the comic shit on it in private behind your back. It was really nice. They did. Yeah. But like, look at this fucking, look at this loser. Who shit on it?

No, I'm just kidding. Give me some fucking names. I'm not a rat cuz let's talk about the battle of Brooklyn. Yeah. Um, well before we do, before we do, cause we're 40 minutes in. Yeah, give me some fucking names. I'm not a rat, cuz. Let's talk about the Battle of Brooklyn. Yeah, well, before we do, before we do. Because we're 40 minutes in and we have to talk about any history. Was that message cheesy? No, it wasn't cheesy, because you're an insecure

FF. I am, right? No, it wasn't cheesy. No, it needed to be said. Truly, it needed to be said. Well, let's do the shoutouts on the reads and then we'll go to the Battle of Brooklyn. All right, fine. Shoutouts on the reads and then we're doing Battle of Brooklyn. And I also wanted to get to some of these comments on the Patreon, because they are 10 out of 10 funny. About our moms? We posted our moms on Patreon.com slash

Bay Ridge Boys. And if you're not a non-Tutant, not a member of the matriarchy, you wouldn't know. But we do have a lot of fun over there and we asked people to comment about what they would, if they wanted to crack open. We got a little sensitive. Me and Chris were listening to these the other day and they made us a little upset.

And Chris said, hey, I want to punch that kid. And then I said, you know what? We asked for it, Chris. Yeah, we did ask for it. Yeah, right. We can't get angry, right? We can't get angry. No. So Chris's UV is a backboard. My dick is Tim Duncan. Yeah. Our PPW first

Hall of Famer says Mama DiStefano was a great AP. She looks so youthful and happy before Papa DiStefano pulled the David Milch and gambled away all her money. Now she has to move the vegetables to feel happy. Yeah. Yeah. And then Clay Anthony, one of our

other Hall of Famers, just goes, that garlic better be sliced thin. So basically he's saying he's going to discipline your mom if the garlic's not sliced thin. We did this to ourselves, cuz. It's what it is. We did it to ourselves, Isis. And then Ryan deep breathing through the

I can't finish the name, but it's obviously a play on emoji face. He says, crack open and clean out then a round of the rosary and a genuflect my way out the door. So he's going to Catholic fucker. Yeah. Your mom's going to get a good Catholic fucking Chris. Yeah. Um,

Leo, I'll give you a burrito after something because the name gets cut off. Says, let me be crystal fucking clear. I would definitely give Chrissy D's dick mom's a fucking big burrito after I crack her open and clean her out. That's what it is. Yeah. And my favorite of all, uh, well, Tim the

two just said fumes. Yeah. So he'll get fucking punched in the face. Yeah. And my favorite of all. Well, Tim, the two just said fumes. Yeah. So he'll get fucking punched in the face. Yeah. You don't you're going to get hit with a snap and right. Tim, the two. Yeah. A fucking quick till. Yeah. My favorite is no, no need to be vulgar. This is from Bill Fugera, which I don't know. Why is he not on the fucking one of our teams? Yeah. Fugera. He he he take few. He made fumes into some sort of foreign language.

Well, it's just might be his real name. Real life. I don't think so. What's the chances? His name is Bill Fugera. Could be Fugary. I mean,

it could be a sauce monkey, right? Yeah. Anyway, this is my favorite comment. Cause he goes, no need to be vulgar. I'd move some vegetables with Mrs.

DiStefano. And then one thing would lead to another Let nature take its course He's going to make love to your mom What do people say about your mom? Yeah, now let's go to my mom Because my mom was a fucking piece Why are we doing this to ourselves?

Because we are the history of jajinas We're too wild We're too fucking wild Do you want to take a walk on the high line after this? Do you want to get some salmon? So Josh Howard says, peace. A lot of people just said, take out the peace guns and they were shooting her down.

So that was about three or four comments. I got a lot of no fumes for Rome. Mater pater, there's nothing we can do. She's absolutely the property of Marcus Aurelius. Pericles, the love child of Chris and something. We got some funny ass fucking kids on here. It says we'd trade six goats and a dozen property of Marcus Aurelius, uh, Pericles, the love child to Chris and something. Uh, we got some funny ass fucking kids on here.

It says we'd trade six goats and a dozen black and white cookies for. Yeah. Yeah. He's going to, somebody said, didn't somebody call me Chrissy thumb socks? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You got that one too. There's a lot of funny, uh, uh, Chris Jinta, uh, average piece.

Let's make no mistake. I love Greek women and would shoot my shot. Even the fam would not approve. Yeah. Yeah. Ricky Southside Irish. These names are the best. Said get the peace guns out. 11 out of 10. Wood Coco. Yeah. Yeah. Even

Demi. Oh, wait, there's a girl here who said something funny. I got to find that one. This one's by the way, how have we has this one slipped past us? Did we read this guy's name? Nah mean smoking Joe Green. Yeah. How did he

not make it on one of our Hall of Fame teams? He might be in these 53. You have to read from these because this kid is good. How great is that name? Nah mean smoking Joe Green. He says her eyes are normal. So this means there's a good chance Yanni is an inbreed. I would definitely crack her open and clean her out right in the middle

of the dirt roads of Rome. He just made a joke about banging my mom in the ass. Chris, we have to stop. Yeah. All right. I'm going to find this one girl and then that's it. Big piece. Patrice says no disrespect, but she's a piece. I'd give my father my biggest pig and most reliable indentured server for because you got to make sense when you're doing these. Yeah. but she's a piece. I'd give my father my biggest pig and most reliable indentured servant fur.

Cuz, you gotta make sense when you're doing these. Yeah. All right. Christian Winky Sphinctubs Yeah. Says, yo, her boobs are a bit incredulous because how far

she's pushing them up. That being said, I'd wear her like a pair of fumed out sunglasses. It's what it is. He wants my mom to sit in his face. Cuz, this is uncomfortable.

Okay, well, let's, we gotta read the Patreon members because we're running out of time here. We gotta get to Battle of Brooklyn and there's some face. Cuz, this is uncomfortable. Okay, well, we gotta read the Patreon members, because we're running out of time here, and we gotta get to Battle of Brooklyn, and there's some Cuz, we already did the Battle of Brooklyn, but let's do it. There's some funny names. Should we read the Patreon members now, and then do Battle of Brooklyn? I got this one last one I found, from Nicole Stevenson. This is the funniest one. She goes,

Cap letters, crack her open and clean her out. Make no mistake, that woman is the pinnacle of Greek evolution. And how the fuck did Yanni pseudo penis Pappas come out of this piece? Look, I swing both ways. It is what it is. What it is.

She wants to go by with my mom. All right. All right. Here we go. Thank you so much for those comments. Now the newest members of our patron who went to patreon.com slash Bay Ridge boys. It seems like a lot of people took our advice and they made actual patron

names pertaining to our pockets. And some of them seem really funny. I'm going to start going now. I think we can have a lot of people took our advice and they made actual patreon names pertaining to our podcast and some of them seem really funny and we're gonna start going now i think we're gonna have a lot of fun here first up jimmy pets pazola got dolphins half price cuts he's coming for the crowd coming for the crowd wow that could be then this kid this is his real name but it's just a funny name and i'm gonna just say it in the voice his name is schmelvin boyville wow that kid screwed it schmelvin boyville wow then we got talia no fumes thompson that's a funny one andrew pace who's just a white kid doesn't want to play along yeah elisa nowak ruben mcfly then we got sean a couple of Jews got to go 2020. It's what it is.

Read. He said Trump 2020, didn't he? He said a couple of Jews got to go 2020. Oh, 2020. OK. We're Sean. She was on. Yeah.

Then we got Jeff. Jeff Boblitz. Yeah. Then we got Krista. Legal to takes it past the Uvula Marie. Then we got just Jess. Yeah. Then we gotony the cleveland cuck and steamer wow this is the best of all time yeah then we got eric price yeah ethan kendrick ross cooper hey then we got candace crack me open then put me down menzinger then we then we got then we got just jeff then we got this person's name is i'm a

tall bald cute kid and my cock always stays soft as a chippin yo cuz these are cracking me open then we got mia casoli who sounds like a piece sauce monkey tyler neiman white kid then we got olivia the water drinking sauce monkey we got a lot of girls now because yeah and these are these are funny then we got talia yeah then we got victor burn the tortillas again valenzuela then we got grant chonko yeah token just one name good then we got cody bitch hips b-zang not an eastern hemi, this is the tense. Wow. Marissa Banks.

Yeah. Adrian Garcia, a.k.a. Chrissy Forthreich. Then we got Andy Dick Within Jab Brains Chica. Yeah, funny. Then we got Pubeless Fumeless Poppy. Wow, that's a goodie. Then we got Ryan Deep Breathing Through the Two Fumes Lynn. Oh, that's the one.

He's an Emoji Face fan. Then we got Smithtown breathing through the two fumes. Lynn. Oh, that's the one. He's emoji face fan. Then we got Smithtown. Smithtown water. Shout out Smithtown water. Smithtown. Then we got Tim Ryder. Tim Ryder. Then we got Chrissy.

Blackface is fine. DeStef Negro. All right. That's a heavy way. Zhang Xing. Zhang Xing. But it's very funny. Yeah.

Then we got David chinking granny. Ching granny. Then we got Brian potato monkey McGough. Heink wanny then we got brian potato monkey mcgough he's an irish kid he's a cold chocolate potato monkey potato monkey irish kids could be called potato monkeys then he's got we got chris picard yeah jeanette fustanasis oh she's a sauce monkey then one word bet you did too christian gold then ashley looking to move some vegetables with a guy from ladder 14. Holy shit. Then we got Nicole Marque.

Then we got Chris want to see Yanni in stockings and a blouse shoes. Holy shit. Then we got Emily Arndt. Yeah. Then we got Patty pencil grinder. PPG is a TBG. Then we got Emily Arndt. Yeah. Then we got Patty Pencil Grinder, PPG to TBG. Then we got Jeff Dyer. Then we got David, I swear it's just bad dick lighting, O'Connell.

That could be the best one. Yeah. Then we got Alex Chaney, Two Minutes, Maybe Four. Then we got Anthony, Not a Black, Ogubongo. Way song she ain't. Then we got Jared Utley. Then we got Malcolm King not a black Ogubongo. Then we got Jared Utley. Then we got Malcolm King Gay Bridges. Then we got James Kitson. Then we got Corey Hathaway.

Then we got Marcus, half African-American, captain of the fume room, Rutherford. Yeah. That was the best list of all time. I'm actually blown away. I'm sorry. I'm actually blown away i'm actually blown can you see i'm actually crying yeah like i mean that was you guys you guys were just funnier than our podcast yeah yeah no it's and we encourage you go to patreon.com slash by rich voice and do that every single time you tell a friend to join to listen to the podcast and get those names because

cuz i mean it makes us laugh hard yeah and you don't have to do it but if you want to go for it go for it we love it and i can't even pick one from there like i there was too many yeah we should actually pick three because it's been three weeks honestly all right oh for the ppw yeah all right do you want to pick it quick because i got the list yeah do you want me to just do it yeah but pick good ones i need to approve of them so say them and you know i think we're gonna pick three yeah yeah so i think we need to agree i think the one that made you laugh the hardest was coming out of the gate jimmy pets pezzola got the offense half price cuts 100 he's one yeah um i think also you really like krista legal too takes a pass to uvula marie

yeah okay she's not not in yet she's not in yet though though. I think you liked... No, put her on. That's funny. How about Ashley looking to move some vessels with a guy from Ladder 14? Yeah. You like this one. Chris want to see Yanni in stockings and a blouse. Yeah. There's too many to choose from. What do you guys like? We got to pick three, right? I know. It's too hard. Well, we got one. Yeah. The first guy's

dead. I mean, fuck. I got Dolphins half-priced because that kid's in. Yeah. And then what was the last? The last that was one of the last ones was really good. Marcus, half African-American, captain of the fume room. I mean, that's another good one. I mean, how do we pick? We got to let these guys pick because they're going to get angry at us. So I picked them all.

Let fucking Mike Emoji face pick. What do you want? I like the Marcus, captain of the fume room. Okay. And what's the other one you like? What about Candace, crack me open, then put me down Metzinger? I mean, they're all good. I like Chris, the legal two, takes it to the funeral. Okay. And what's the other one you like? What about Candace? Crack me open and put me down Metzinger. I mean, they're all good.

I like crystal legal too. Takes a pass. Do you feel like, yeah, that was really good. Let's do it. All right. So from now on,

let's let these guys choose. Okay. Because they get angry at us. Have you noticed that? They get angry. They're also good. So no, they're also fucking good.

It's hard. So how do you pick? We should just pick them all, but we're, we're picking teams, right? We're going to get back to the draft when Venetia gets back from fucking her world tour yeah what the fuck she's doing that's i'm upper west side i'm just mad crazy out here i'm mad because yeah greeks are the only girls when they get a job are greek

people the only people in america or throughout the diaspora who go i will work for you but it is for 11 months out of the year because i'm going to greece for one full month because you gotta be honest though i mean venet Venetia is literally in Greece right now posting pictures from islands, but still sent us the work that needed to be done. She screwed in. She's good.

Yeah. I mean, how many Mike, how many Isis's do you think equal one Venetia? If we were going to do it, if we're going to do a math equation, how many Isis's would it be?

25 Isis's. 25 Isis's to one Venetia? Yeah. How many emoji faces to one Venetia? About 15. 15. Yeah. Mike's, yeah one Venetian. Yeah. How many emoji faces to one Venetian? About 15. 15. Yeah. Mike's, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Zach, Zach's the first to go. Zach's a 23-year-old kid, and he's got a lot, he's going to pass out when he's rapping because he's got a lot, he's got a lot of podcasts to edit. Yeah. Zach, Zach makes podcasts on stage. Yeah.

Yeah. Zach, it's going to be like eight miles. Zach, yeah. When that first time when Eminem just can't listen to the words, that's what's going to happen to Zach one day. Yeah, Zach, it's going to be like eight miles. Zach, yeah, when that first time when Eminem just can't listen to the words, that's what's going to happen to Zach one day. He's going to come back. We're going to do our first live podcast in New York City. It's going to be coming up real soon. Where are we going to do it?

And we're going to do it with Nets behind the stage, and the whole time the whole thing is which one of us is going to pass out. Yeah, I love it. And you know what? Zach will be there to catch us, and Mike Suarez will be behind us to just act as a cushion. If we fall to break the fall, if Mike just lies down behind you, if you fall,

cause you're not going to hit your head. Yeah. What you doing? Cause we're in the middle of a show. Yeah. No, I was looking, I was looking to,

to get to vanity as notes. Okay. But let me just say quickly, cause I actually, so I've been reading the book 1776, because I am an FF. Stunkhold. What I do know about the Battle of Brooklyn,

besides, I can look at Venetia's notes. Let me talk freely what I know about it quickly, and we can chime in and out. And then you open up Venetia's notes and tell me what's going on. So here's what I learned. Just be free,

like you've always wanted to be free to talk about history. Let me just get, let me get my pussy up a little bit. Let me get my pussy in the air, because when I get, when I talk about the Revolutionary War. Can me just get my pussy up a little bit. Let me get my pussy in the air because when I talk about the Revolutionary War. Can I just ask you a quick question? Yeah. If you said to the McFarlick brothers,

if you said, hey guys, look, I got a different thing for today. Instead of going down to the basketball court, are you guys skull fucking me? How about we fucking talk about the book 1776 because I'm half into it and I'm really into it. Yeah. Guys, aren't you excited about the Revolutionary War? What would they say to you? Yeah. Yeah. If i said that to them if i said that i love the revolutionary

war which you do which i really do i think yeah i think what would happen is is one of the one of the brothers would hold my mouth open and the other one put his cock in there that's just what i think would happen and my uvula would get fucking tapped like a speed bag, like a speed bag. A lot of 14. It's a lot of 14. So 1770. So August 27th to August 29th, right around our birthdays. Giannis's birthday is the 25th. Me and Mikey emoji face are August 26th. So right around our fucking birthday. Holy shit.

Your birthday is the 26th. Yeah. We're August 26th. You're August 25th. We're bringing a fucking cake in here. Sorry, Liz. Yeah. We're going to bring a fucking big cake in here.

And yeah, because if you if you don't because if you don't think for our fucking birthdays, I didn't already book us a table at Medieval Times. You got another thing coming. I'm so excited. We're going to that. Are you down? We're going to that. You already booked it for August 29th. And let's just invite all the Patreon members. You want to just do a Patreon birthday party?

Yeah, let's do a Patreon birthday party at Medieval Times. And the only person who can't come is Chris the teacher. That's what it is. We're going to bring a birthday cake in here here and if you think anyone who works here is gonna say something to chrissy d and if you don't think that he's gonna whack you in succession like a game of whack-a-mole with a snap and right you got another thing coming because i'm gonna be really fucking upset if vanity is not back in the states for our birthdays yeah you better be back in the states for our birthdays dope word yeah word, yeah. Dope word, yeah. And you better

come to fucking Medieval Times. Are you serious, Mike? Because we're going to Medieval Times. Not the Renaissance Fair. Medieval Times by Giant Stadium. What day? No. I definitely want to go. Let me go. We'll go Sunday. We'll go that Sunday, August 30th. Maybe my mom, maybe it'll be a big joint family birthday party. Hoping my family's taking me back

by then. joint family birthday party hoping my family's taking me back by then i mean they don't people are laughing and they don't even know how funny it is yeah because they don't know what's really going on okay so let me tell you what's really going on is this podcast may be over legally we're here for it we're here for a good time not a long time time. So tell your friends now. Tell your friends now that the podcast name might change and we might be on another. You might be able to hear us from somewhere else, but maybe doing this thing in wrestling masks.

What if we kept this podcast on the run and we kept sneaking and recording like we're Edward Snowden from like different We're sneaking in from different countries that will harbor us. This week we're coming to you from the that'll harbor us we're in this week we're coming to you from the ecuadorian fucking embassy embassy yeah all right so let me get this august 27th to august 29th you had the battle of brooklyn now it's also called the battle of long island because long island you said south you know long island when you say long island new york

brooklyn is technically on long island so is Queens. Can you just call this Alzheimer's wild? Because we did all of this. I'm clear. One hundred percent. We've even said that same thing. OK, I think we did a full battle of Brooklyn episode. Guys, we're going to do it again with a history hyenas. We're going to do it again. And there's going to be new facts that history doesn't change, but make no mistake.

My thoughts about it does. Yeah. Okay. So first, okay, hold on. Let me just pull my jean shorts down. So August 27th to August 29th, Battle of Brooklyn started. Okay. Yeah.

Now this is right after the Declaration of Independence was proclaimed and written and King George III already had it on his doorstep. Okay. Because here's one thing you got to know about the Revolutionary War. One interesting thing I did. This is a good fact. One thing I really did learn about the Revolutionary War is when it started in 1775 with the Siege of Boston and the Battle of Concord. When that started, all the 13 colonies that met, whether they were loyalists or patriots, it didn't matter.

whether they were loyalists or patriots, it didn't matter. American citizens, early colonial American citizens, all they wanted was if they were going to be taxed, they wanted a representative in parliament. They didn't want the taxation without representation anymore. That's what this was about. So the British empire, King George himself said, send troops over there. Do not kill anybody. Just show order, get them in order and like, let's have negotiations. But he was saying he wasn't sending the troops the big troops he wasn't sending there were marines that the marines were around at 1776 on the british side he wasn't sending them he said no no these are our countrymen they're like our little brothers and sisters the 13 colonies so we don't want to hurt you then what happens is no we're good siege of boston happens where uh the bostonians uh

britain was surrounded by george washington and his army and then the boston they basically laid the city of boston at siege and uh general howe and all the which is washington's counterpart on the british side went up the went up the water to Halifax, Nova Scotia, and just chill there for a little bit. And the British, the American soldiers weren't getting paid. They were fighting for like a year and nobody was getting paid. So they started to go back to their homes in Maine and New England because mostly it was New England fighting. The initial start of the Revolutionary War was just New England. Really, New York and South weren't really involved yet they were but not really so soldiers start to go home okay so the american don't want

to do it anymore like listen let them fucking tax us not texas we've been gone for 10 months people are getting killed now my farm my wife's dying like i gotta go home so george washington and benjamin franklin and alexander hamilton and all these great minds say not alexander hamilton benjamin franklin thomas jefferson and george washington and uh john hancock all say we got to come up with propaganda we got to come up with something that's going to rally people how about full independence which had never nobody was talking about independence in 1775 when the war started because you think oh this war for independence which is what it became but it wasn't until july 4th well george washington said write declaration of

independence write it right now let it go fester to the 13 colonies and then we'll get this rally cry of people to come back and want to join our army so are you basically saying that it was a marketing tool it was a marketing tool independence in the beginning was a marketing tool. It was a marketing tool. Independence in the beginning was a marketing tool. There was no real intention of ever being independent from Britain because they really weren't treating us that bad. They were giving us we the 13 colonies were the richest, were the richest colonies in the whole British Empire. We had as much money in our Federal Reserve. money in our federal reserve. We had as much money as they did in London because of how much we, how well we were doing with tobacco and our imports and exports. So we, they did not, Britain didn't want to lose us. And we don't want to, all we wanted was a member in their

parliament, but they looked at us like little fucking scumbags, a little fucking dirty Mexicans. That's what they looked at us like. Yeah. Yeah. I wasxian. I was just kidding. Yeah. Wei Shangxian. That's what they thought. Yeah. But it's like, you know, they wanted to build a wall around us, but it's like, we have all the money. So basically, um, yeah. England is like Dame Dash and British Empire is like Rockefeller.

Know what I mean? And we were Jay-Z. Yeah. And we were just getting too good, too rich. Yeah. And too much. And like, you know what I mean? We just, we had to leave Rockefeller.

Yeah. To become a billionaire on our own. We had to leave it. And then we had to marry the Queen B. So with the Battle of Brooklyn, so what happens is, so now this is August 27th. This is two months after, well, close to two months after the Declaration of Independence has

been signed. And it's also one day after your birthday. It's one day after my birthday. Yeah. So what does that mean? That now King George III. It means you're shitting out turkey legs from medieval times. It's what it is. it's one day after my birthday yeah so what what does that mean that now king george the third means you're shitting out turkey legs from medieval times it's what it is now king george the third has said by this time he said okay fuck you you want to be independent now i'm sending in the fellas he sent in the gentleman yeah because he said he sent in his marines he sent his best troops he sent in 50 battleships so the battleships are going up and down the Hudson River with the

Arizona bridges today. They were going up and down the Hudson River, British battleships. No, we had no, no Navy. We had no Americans did not have a Navy. So whoever controlled the water in New York controlled the battlefield.

So George Washington's greatest strength, what they, his people say when they wrote about him was that he was able to see things as they were not as he wishes. They were, he was also a tall drink of they were, not as he wishes they were. He was also a tall drink of water. He was also a tall drink of water. And cuz, make no mistake, this is how fucking stupid it was like just back in the day.

The only real reason George Washington got to become president of the United States is because he was a tall kid. And he was white. And he was weak. Yeah, cuz. And that's another thing, just real quick, just a little side thing. You know, pick and choose. I love how people want to-

Get the Ray Jean Jean button ready. I love how people want to pick and choose.'s getting still on the left side yeah who the fucking villains in history are because guess what george washington benjamin franklin thomas jefferson even alexander hamilton guess what they all had slaves yeah so when you want to fucking shit on christopher columbus because he's an italian kid that discovered a fucking america with the only through the power of jesus christ and you want to shit on him and say he's a bad guy. Why don't you look at everybody else in history, too? Because guess what?

They like fucking slaves. I think they all do. I think they do shit on all those people. No. Well, you know what? Yeah. We just get away. Just because his mouth.

Yeah. But you know what's interesting? Yeah. Another quick thing I learned. Yeah. Britain, England abolished slavery in like the 1650s. So when General Howe and all the big time generals came to the 13 colonies and stepped foot for the first time and reported back to King George, there's a letter that the general wrote said, other than the how bad this country looks because of the war and how the troops, the colonial troops do not look good and healthy and they're sick so the biggest problem we have here is the ghastly side of slaves like it was slave even back then so we're the little sinister kind of country because to not abolish slavery to the 1860s when the other major countries were like this is an

inhumane thing what you're doing to these people a little dirtbag because there were plenty of african well african i guess born redcoats that fought with the british army but even george washington himself did not allow blacks to fight in the army until the very end of the war when they absolutely needed them. So everybody in history is a piece of shit for a different reason. Well, times change. Yeah, it's all different, all very good. But, you know, that's really easy for them to say because they were just taking in our taxes. We were shipping our product back to their companies.

Yeah. Right. With these these you know land owners and these crop owners who have tobacco fields so they're taking the money and they're taking that high profit margin that slavery provides and then they just are fucking shining down

like well how British is that well that's all true they just pretend they're always pretend they're above it but the reason why they wanted to keep us is because of all the fucking cash crops that they were getting for cheap because of slavery so fuck you england britain did have indentured servitude which is kind of like just a fancy way of getting around slavery so i guess you're true there but real quick back to the battle back to the um battle of brooklyn um so everybody knew that whoever had the whoever had the water, whoever had the water had the battlefield.

Smithtown. Shut out. So George Washington kind of knew that. But Continental Congress, you know, they're saying Benjamin Franklin, this guy said, no, you have to fight. We're fighting for our freedom now. It's a different thing. The whole country, all these boys have arrived to fight for freedom. We have to fight them.

Now you had 12,000 upwards of I'm sorry, 20,000 British troops, 9,000 of them were Hessian German army. My people, the Hessians, the Hessian Britain had hired. England had hired Hessian mercenary soldiers and the Hessians were German, German born soldiers. So there was a lot of Germans.

Yeah. There was a lot of Germans that they fought with us. And we also had Spanish soldiers that fought with us, but the Hessians numbered 9,000. So just the Hessian mercenaries alone were as big as the entire Continental Army in 1776, plus 11,000 British soldiers.

So we had 20,000 of, by the way, trained Marine, Hessian soldiers were mercenaries. These were professional soldiers and the bulk of Britain's army, professional soldiers, the bulk of our army, farmers. What's his face? Henry Knox, who we named Fort Knox around, who was like pretty much saved, like was one of the main reasons why we even were able to continue with the war because he saved cannons. He brought cannons from Fort Ticonderoga and like basically like was able to get us some type of real firepower.

He was like a fucking mailman or like he worked in like a he would like he was like or a watchmaker. He had some bullshit job and he was a general, like a high ranking general. Even George Washington himself had no battle experience before the Battle of Brooklyn. That was the first battle he ever commanded. So none of these got General Howe and all the generals. That's the most important battle in the Revolutionary War. Absolutely. All the generals on the British side. And it was fought in Park Slope.

It was fought in Park Slope. Where me and Colin Quinn are from. Absolutely. Fucking, fucking, fucking British. Fucking, fucking, fucking British. Some people fucking is, fucking is. Fucking Jimmy Norton. Jimmy Norton's coming. I just wanted, just wanted you know you're not gonna fucking get me on comedy central i'm not gonna fucking say whatever you gotta fucking bullshit i'm a fucking purist

yeah fucking la fuck you fuck you todd barry um so so henry knox so henry not um so all the generals on the british side had major war experience don't forget the french and indian war cute cute that it just happened on American soil

like 10 years before that. So, you know, George Washington fought as a soldier, but he didn't, he wasn't a general. This was his first general experience. Yes. So he made a lot of, cute, he made a lot of crucial mistakes, baby. Yeah. Okay, so let me just tell you really quick what happened. Yeah. So they were, he made

a joke about his cousin and that was the crucial mistake he made? Yeah, it was a big, yeah, big mistake. So they were... He made a joke about his cousin and that was the crucial mistake he made? Yeah, it was a big mistake. So what happened is you had British pretty much all around him and he had the water behind him. So he thought... There's Muslims everywhere.

There's Muslims everywhere. That's basically what he said. He woke up and said, there's Muslims everywhere. We're surrounded by Chinese and Muslims everywhere. A lot of 14. Yeah, a lot of 14. But this is the last day. This is the Italian Alamo.

It's Paulie Gans. It's the six-year anniversary of my gym and my vitamin line. He had a nice little party. He had a nice party. I couldn't box him the other day because he said he was, you know, he's having a nice get-together with his mom and some of his family because it was the six-year anniversary of him turning his uh garage into a boxer gym and his vitamin line that he does out of his mother's basement so it was a big thing and we couldn't box

it's true um no i love this podcast is here for a good time not a long time yeah we are the heath ledger podcast yeah can i get a way some people might get a way song chain um okay so the biggest crucial mistake he made is he put all he divided his army so you were never under any circumstance when you are so outnumbered by the enemy which he knew he was he divided his army he sent half of his army up north towards harlem so white man's old tricks yeah yeah and then divide and conquer well yeah he sent half he sent half of his army north to harlem. So white man's old tricks. Yeah. Yeah. And then divide and conquer. Well, yeah, he sent half of his army north to Harlem just to clean that up a little bit. Wei Songxian.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm just kidding. You go wild. Yeah. Wei Shixian. People know I'm joking. Yeah, of course. And then he said the other half of his army is south broken to deal with the Chinese. Wei Songxian. No. And then he said the other half of his army is southbroking to deal with the Chinese. Wei Songxian.

No. No. So what he did is he split his army and he left only five. First of all, they had no cavalry. Okay. You understand? They got no horses. The guys, we had no horses.

But they did have control of the water. They didn't control the water? No, no, no. No, we didn't have control of the water. You should have called in Smithtown control of the water. The British fucking warships are going up and down the water. They didn't control the water? No, no, no. No, we didn't have control of the water. You should have called in Smithtown control of the water. The British fucking warships are going up and down the water. They're going up and down the water like the fucking, you know, just swimming around like the Puerto Ricans in the fire hydrant.

Don't, no matter what. Yeah, and no matter what you do, don't throw batteries at any of your friends. Yeah, don't do it. Yeah, so that's pretty much all we could do is throw batteries at these fucking British warships and we didn't have nothing. didn't yeah we had nothing we had a fucking we had a fucking canoe that's all we had yeah we had nothing so so he puts five soul jamaica plains it was called it's like a little pass like in in the middle like pretty close to prospect park it

used to be called jamaica plains he only put five the only five horses he had he put five soldiers there because he said these five soldiers will be able to deal because they aren't horses we're able to deal with whatever british soldiers come this way because he was like i'm banking they're not going to come up this pass because it's very now and then general howe was like he probably thinks we're not going to go up that pass and he's a dumb fucking general that has general that has no experience so guess what i'm going to do send 2 000 british redcoats right down that pass up the dirt road. And they grabbed them right in the ass. Yeah. They grabbed all five of them immediately without a fight and then just took them prisoner. Nobody ever heard from them again. Right. And then next thing you know, he's got half of his army up in Harlem for

no reason. The British never went there. There was no reason to go there. And then the other remaining troops who were supposed to call Harlem back then. then yeah who was yeah yeah who was supposed to be defended who's supposed to be defended by these five people who he didn't he you know who the british troops just walked right through now he has the entire he has about 4 000 british soldiers versus like 1500 uh colonial soldiers with their back to the water with their back to the fucking water. Italian Alamo time. Yeah, on graves and bay. Yeah, you got to fucking start throwing hands. You saw graves and bay?

Graves and bay. Yeah. Yeah, you got to start throwing hands. Yeah. That's the only way. So what happened? So they started going hand to hand? Started going hand to hand combat.

So here's the mistake. Here's the one thing that you have to fucking always understand. One thing about, one thing you fucking have to know for sure, and I don't care what religion you are, I don't care what race you are, you got to know one thing and one thing only, Jesus is an American kid. You got to know Jesus is an Italian kid.

Is Rafael De Luca, like, has he done making music? Yeah, what did he? I mean, come up with another one. Come up with another one, yeah. That's like the fourth time you've said Jesus is an American kid. Because Jesus is an Italian-American kid. Is he?

And he's from Brooklyn, New York. Is he? And I'm going to tell you why. Okay. Jesus is an Italian-American kid. He's from Brooklyn, New York, and he's specifically from Gravesend Bay. Yeah. Kids from Gravesend, and if he wasn't out fucking being the son of man, he'd also be a fucking DJ in low life.

Yeah. But he's the son of man. Yeah'd also be a fucking DJ in low life. But he sees the son of man, and so he's got shit to do. So what happens is... But the Catholic clergy definitely fuck children. They're pedophiles. Yeah, but we don't want to talk about that. So I just wanted to sneak that in.

Out of 14, that's a character piece. None of that stuff is true. But I do have a situation with Father Bill. So Jesus... So here's what I'm going to tell you what happened. On August 29th general how okay ready for this general how george washington's counterpart was getting counsel from his other general saying crush them let's fucking crush them right now they're right there they have

nowhere to go let's crush them let's fucking end this thing and he said no let's reserve we won't we won't go after them yet let's wait a day let's wait one more day because it was a big rainstorm let's wait a day and they're like no no we can crush them we have the marines they're right there they're done he's like where can they possibly go we know exactly where they are okay george washington sends a letter mistake sends a letter to the guys in up in harlem yeah he says he says you know he's whatever a carrier pigeon or something like that he says hey guys you know what i um just you know come down come down south come down to where we are in brooklyn gravesend bay or whatever they called it back then he says get the whole army back to me nobody make a fucking sound okay nobody make a sound it's the dead of night it's august 29th he, be quiet. Here we go. Yeah. He says to them, what we're going to do now is.

Yes. Yeah. He says, it's a dead end night. Yeah. Yeah. OK. They think they got us beat. They think they got us beat.

They said, no, where are they going to go? Where are they going to go? We know where they are. We know exactly where they are. The British are saying, I say, oh, don't don't worry about it. We know exactly where they are. Let's have tea and later. Yeah.

We're going to get them later. So George Wise says, boys, get down from Harlem right now. I know there's a lot of fucking things going on up there. I know you guys are fucking going wild. Come down right now. Get back to Brooklyn. We're fucking leaving. So he takes the whole, he gets all the people from the surrounding villages secretly.

Give us all your boats. Give us everything you need. Leave the bulk of the shit here. Don't fucking worry about it. Let the British have it. We're going to get on boats. We're going to go across that water. We're going to go across that water and we're going to do it slowly. We're going to do it quietly. We're going to do it like fucking Americans.

He says, if we're going to save this country, this war of independence is going to continue against the tyrant, tyrannical British rule. It's going to have to be right now. Listen to me. I'm fucking George Washington. And Jesus is an American, get with us. Yeah. I got wooden teeth, I'll chop down an apple tree, I got slaves.

So he says, get in these boats. They're going across the boats, one after another, getting across silently, swiftly. All they have is torches, little, little, little torches that actually george washington three hours into the mission said ignite the torches we're doing this in the pure fucking darkness we're going to do this in the fucking pure dark so the british don't see us

it's four o'clock in the morning five o'clock in the morning thousands of troops going across getting to safety our army being saved minute by minute our army being saved in fight for independence continuing at 6 35 in the morning the the first wave of British soldiers wake up to take a look at where their army is to get ready for the attack. Fog comes in. Jesus Christ blows a big fart and says, I'm an American kid. He says, Dad, I'm a fucking American kid. I'm an Italian American kid.

That's Brooklyn. Give them the fog. A British soldier wrote in his diary on the morning of august 29 1776 before he had knew anything about the americans leaving he said i can't see a foot in front of me if the americans are gonna go i if i was the americans i'd i'd leave now we can't see anybody not thinking they would ever do it. By the time the fog rolled in, by the time the fog rolled, rolled out 745 a.m. The entire army, the entire army, every single one of the soldiers besides three that had stayed behind to plunder and raid and rape and take and sell goods were gone across the river up to Harlem. And then they went all the way backtracked all the way to New Jersey through Pennsylvania.

And the fight continued and that's how the Battle of Brooklyn was lost but our independence was actually won because we're fucking Italian American kids and we fight to the end and we fight to the end and Jesus Christ fought to the end and that's why Paulie Gassi's got pictures of Jesus Christ

all over his fucking garage because he's an Italian kid and I guarantee you and he's a piece according to our fans. Yeah, he's a good looking kid. If that battle was for in any other borough in any other in any other state, Jesus wouldn't have given that fog, but because it was Brooklyn and he knew he had to save it because John Travolta would be doing

movies there one day. He had to save it. We've definitely covered that fog before in our... But what I said was more interesting, was more facts. Was thaty that was real good no it was real good i told the story good yeah you told the story real good and i didn't know that you that's a very interesting fact that america was basically formed this sort of a marketing campaign to rally the that's all it was yeah we know there was no intention when you those kids were screwed in kids george washington ben

franklin absolutely hancock those kids were screwed in kids yeah and what we talk about and you know what we talk about like you what we talk about, like the president, because I drove my mother home today because she watched my daughter last night, and she told me that- She's voting for Trump 2020. She told me, she just, she told me, Chris, she said, honestly, she said, I just closed my eyes and I moved my hand to the right, and that's how I vote.

That's what she told me. Way song she ain't. She goes, I didn't want to vote for Trump, she said, but I just pushed that, I just go to the right, and that's what I do. She said, I've been doing that, that's what I do every election. that. I just go to the right. And that's what I do. She said that I've been doing that. That's what I do every election. Really? I just go to the right because she doesn't because she doesn't believe in abortion. Right.

All right. Right. Right. Right. Right. She's like, I don't believe I don't agree. She's like, I think Trump's an idiot. She's like, but my hand goes right.

And then I just go down one. Right. So it's just she's a Republican lady. That's just what it is. It's just what it is. Yeah. I mean, nobody likes abortion, but you can't make it illegal. That's. Yeah. And that's where the left messes up, too, by saying, like, I'm it's just what it is yeah i mean nobody likes abortion but you can't make it illegal that's

yeah and that's where the left messes up too by saying like i'm pro it's like stop celebrating it's not a great thing no matter what i know but it's like it's just not your business to to legislate it it's not your business it's like you can't make it illegal that's what i think well i think i mean what are you gonna do with all these babies but but the reason why i bring it up is because we were talking about she was like, maybe the Catholic Church is against abortion because unwanted kids is what they fuck. It's what it is. And you can't mess with somebody's supply. Is this Legion of Skanks or History Hyena?

I'm in trouble on Legion of Skanks. I know, but that was a solid joke. So the reason why I'm bringing it up. A lot of people are going to be pissed, but it was a solid joke. The reason why I'm bringing this up is because we were talking about she was asking me who I want to vote for. And I said, I don't trust any of these candidates. She asked me who I trust. And I said, I don't trust anybody running for president at all because it's absolute power and they have massive fucking egos.

That's why George Washington was our only president to not be elected. He was not elected by the people. He was put forward by Congress and he did not want the power. He wanted, according to the book, it to be a chamber of four. He wanted four people to run the country. So nobody had absolute power. He wanted, according to the book, it to be a chamber of four. He wanted four people to run the country. So nobody had absolute power. He didn't even want Congress. It's sort of like the archaic form of checks and balances. That's what he wanted. Just four, choose four, and we'll all balance each other out.

And, you know, of course he became the first president and commander in chief and all that. Yeah. Cause he wasn't that bright of a kid. He wasn't. And he wasn't that good of a general. Yeah. He made a lot of mistakes. Yeah. I mean, he's just one of those kids. I mean, his presidency was actually kind of like a marketing thing. Like, hey, let's rally everyone. Just the way they rallied the colonialists against the British.

Him being president was like rallying the country as one because he was such a war hero. Yeah. Because he was kind of a little F&B. He was a little F&B. He was a little F&B to say, hey, you know, let's just. That's a very Brooklyn thing to do while you're in Brooklyn too. After the Battle of Brooklyn and everything turns out we lost that battle, but then we ended up winning the war.

That would be something a guy from Brooklyn would say. He would say, ladder 14, he'd go, you know what, just give me three guys. All I need is three guys, three other guys and we can run this whole fucking thing. We'll run a thing for guys. We'll check each other out. We'll help each other out. You want to know another little interesting thing I learned? Yes, they do, Chris.

That it's not exactly it, but the way that Revolutionary War soldiers probably sounded is close throughout the whole country. It's closer to what they sound like still today in Boston. The Boston accent is the closest to what they think, how people spelled words and little things that they have. Like, you know, scientists. Oh, my God. You know how annoying that would have been? That they were like, let's get to the water. Can you imagine being alive and having that accent all around you?

Because that actually, you know, when I went down in Providence, I had to fucking hear that the whole fucking time. Yeah. It's like, have you been here before? Yeah. Are you fucking nervous? Yeah. They're a little harsh. They're a little harsh.

They're a little fucking harsh. So is there anything you want to add to that? How do you know that though? How did you, who came up with all in 1776? but how did people know that that was the accent? Probably the Boston accents, how everyone talked.

They were saying, because you know, uh, people who like study like writing and I don't know how they came up with it, but yeah, you're a little Franks and beans yourself. Yeah. I'm just,

you know what? I would get behind you for the presidency. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I'd get behind you in a tall drinks and beans yourself. Yeah. I'm just, you know what? I would get behind you for the presidency. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I'd get behind you in a tall drink of water like yourself. Put you, I put you on a stamp.

I got a little bit, but my ass is a little blown out. Yeah. Let's vote. But you know, I do a medium tight shot. Here's the thing. I'd rather vote for you for president because you just look like you got,

you got things going on. You don't look like your life is a calamity. Then vote for me. Because when you look at me, I just look like a four-eyed pipsqueak. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You look like a hotshot Democratic candidate. It's kind of retarded. I look like I'm handing out pamphlets for Beto in San Antonio. Beto.

Little did I know, I don't know if you knew, but Michael Margie told me, like, Texas is no different than like a lot of the places where the urban areas are mostly liberal. And then the places outside of that are are mostly conservative. Right, Mike? Yep.

So like San Antonio, the city is actually votes pretty liberal because, you know, when you live outside of Texas, you probably you think that the whole state of Texas is like votes Republican. But it's not true. Right. Right. You just got, right? Right. You just guys skew, right? Because there's more people still living in the country. Yeah. When you show the maps after the elections, the main cities are always blue and everything

else is red. Yeah. Which way do you go? I go blue. You go blue. You're a blue kid. Isis, you're a blue kid? Oh yeah.

Blue kid. Yeah. Chrissy, where do you go? I go, I, I'm a, i was blue for most of my life but now i am two feet in the red i think unfortunately i think there's a lot of uh blue kids who are starting to go more red yeah i mean because like it's a lot of like i had an argument with twitter on twitter with someone today um and i wasn't even arguing. I was just, I just wanted to get involved in a conversation. She was going trans women are women. And I'm going like, why can't trans women just be trans women? Why can't that be a beautiful thing?

Yeah. Just trans women are trans women. And that's a great thing. There's nothing wrong. Like, why are you trying to afford? I go, if trans women are women, then what are women? Exactly. And then they go, they're women. But I go, so does that mean women are trans women too? Because if women are, if trans women are women, then women should be trans women. It's like, what, why, what's this madness? Why are you forcing us to lie? Why? Right. If I, if I came home with a trans woman and my parents were like, so when can we expect a baby? And I say, and I go, well, you know, she is a woman but you know it's like come on man exactly that's what happens now with articles about

health where it's about women having to get like things checked out and then a trans advocate is like well this is really harsh for trans women because we don't have those like I mean that's not for you then yeah that that's really like we're starting to play with what reality is yeah like that you're starting to play with what reality is yeah like

that you're starting to say like hey you're trying to tell me blue is yellow and like you can't keep we can't do that anymore i know things are really comfortable and science is allowing people to transition right right but you can't you can't go that route you can't be offended by actual definitions like you can be a woman and a biological woman but if you're biologically born a woman and you're actually a If you're biologically born a woman and you're actually a man, you still have parts you gotta take care of. You're a trans woman.

And that's fine. You identify as a woman and you're a trans woman. And I see you as a trans woman. And there should be nothing wrong with that. Nobody should discriminate against trans people. It's in your best interest because you have the health issues of what you were born with. You have your health issues of what you were born with and you're third sexed and you should be third sexed and proud and that's it.

That's it. We're good? That was a good episode, right? Yeah, we just got into the calls. Let's do some. We didn't read the sponsors. Right? Yeah, go ahead, Chris. 9th Street Auto Collision located at

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We love you. Now let's make some calls. Let's make some calls. You know what? People actually love the calls. We should do whole episodes of calls, like randomly. That would really catch us up. Yeah, we should just do whole episodes of calls.

Alright, ready? This is Derek Kenmore. Yeah. I mean, people would listen to a whole episode of calls. Yeah. Sorry. How many calls are we doing? Five.

What's the name? Derek Ken Amor? Yeah. We should just do an extra one free episode a month of all calls. That'll make it easy. I just fixed our problem. I just fixed the fucking problem. Oh, look at that.

We're thinking on our feet. I'm screwed in. Hey, what's up, Derek? Is this Derek Kenmore? Yeah, it is. Are you a fucking toot or non-toot? Hold on a second. Yeah, when people know it's the hyenas, they got to step outside

your office. They got to go far away from where they get caught. They got to go far away because the thing is, it's a little bit too wild. Yeah, they got to go far away from their career. to go far away because the thing is, it's a little bit too wild. Yeah, they got to go far away from their career. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm walking, walking out into the field now. All right. I'm good. Not too. Yeah. It's in a field. Yeah. Not a tooth.

Now you screwed in. I got your dick tucked back. What are you doing? I think so. I mean, it's a summer day like that. Yeah. The dick's back and just go at it. Where do you live now, cuz?

Northern California. Way up there. Way up there. Way up there. You're trying to get as far away from the wall as possible. Away from those white walkers. Yeah, man. They'll get you every time. Now, if you needed to crack open one and you only could crack open one and you had to gun your head, is it Mike Emoji Face or Zach Isis?

Oh, definitely Mike. Yeah. Yeah. You make his face go like that, you make his face go like that. You make his face go like that. And then we said that on our first live show, if he doesn't get laughs, we're going to squeeze him until he farts. Cuz, what are you going to eat for lunch? Lunch?

I don't know. It's 10.30. Oh, that's right. Yeah. About far ahead, yeah. Well, if you need some ideas, go to Nutrition Made Fun. Yeah, cuz. You're a little F&B. He told you it was Northern California. Yeah. If you need some ideas, go to Nutrition Made Fun. Yeah, because your little F&B told you it was Northern California.

Yeah, because the episode we just did is fucking wild. My family wants to disown me. It happens. Who gives a fuck? I could always live with you, right? Derek, what are you fucking doing? You're breathing heavy like Mike Emoji Face. I think it's hilarious that the fans have to go into a field.

One of my co-workers is hearing you. Can you tell your co-workers about us or you don't think they'd like it? Maybe. I don't know. I'm a deputy sheriff. Thank you for your service. Wow. Thank you for your service. No problem. Yeah, it's very white.

So they might like your show. Wow. What did he just say? He said, everyone likes the show. All races love our show. Let me ask you a question. Yeah, because we're always at the Hayburn time limit. Yeah. Are we at the Hayburn time limit? Almost. Very close.

Thanks, guys. Wow, he Hayburn timed us? See you later. Kids got to get back to saving the fucking community. Yeah. I'll see you later. Have a good day. Kid's got to get back to saving the fucking community. I mean, the fact that he goes, I go, are you fucking tuning out? He goes, hold on, hold on, hold on. And he had to walk into a field. He had to walk into a field with his

fucking tool belt on, with his gun on it. I just don't like the fact that he said, I think you guys would do well up here because it's white. What's going on with that? Yeah, it's probably a little bit of my fault. Yeah. Listen, I'm going to clean out a whole apple pie. We're joking about everything.

Chrissy's joking. I'm going to get an apple pie. You want something a little sweet? Yeah, because I'm dealing with a lot of things that happened yesterday and I'm suppressing it and I just want sweets. But I do have to exercise. I got to eat something. Yeah, Mike's down for pie. Yeah, Mike's always down for pie. I had want sweets. But I do have to exercise. I got to eat something. Yeah, Mike's down for pie. Yeah, Mike's always down for pie.

Mike's the type of guy who will take a dessert to go. He's just a guy who will just go. He'll have a piece of cake at the restaurant and he'll be like, can I get another one to go? Yeah, and it's just what it is. Okay, yeah, Mike, let's call this next. Yeah, let's call this next. Mike's a good comic.

I'm telling you. We had a good time in San Antonio.. Mike's a good comic. I'm telling you. We had a good time in San Antonio. He's also a good hang. It was great, man. You guys should have went on scooters with him. It's funny to see Mike on a scooter. Me and Sergio were like, Sergio's like, yo, he shook. That was

Demetrio's Gavritas. Oh, wow. You talk to this. No, you ask him if you could date his sister. Oh, wow. Are you talking to this? Are you talking to this fucking... No, you ask him if you could date his sister. What's it? Dimitri, right? Dimitrios. Yeah, Dimitri.

Dimitrios. Kids, there's no way he's picking up. He's a Greek kid. He's working. Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice message. I was going to leave his number. Oh, that's right. Yeah.

Well, we're going to employ this new strategy of mine because that's fun. Once a month, we'll just do all calls. We'll do episodes of all calls and it'll be a bonus free episode we'll put out. So every month they'll get one. All the toots will get one extra episode. What are you

laughing at? I don't know what it's going on. Just thinking about things in my head. What happened? No, just fucking nothing. Okay, this is Christian Winky Shvink Dubs. Oh, this kid's great. Have we ever called this kid? I don't think so.

We don't know what's going on. He was just red. That's why if we do that episode, we'll just start calling. It's also relaxing, you know? We don't have to fucking do any research. Winky Schvink. Winky Schvink dubs. You got to walk out into a field.

It's the hyenas. Winky Schvink, you got to walk away. Oh my God. What are you doing, cuz? Cuzzy, what are you doing? Dude, I'm clocking out at work almost, dude. Wow, you can't talk to us while you're in your place of employment, right? It's too wild?

You know what? I don't care. Yeah, you don't care. Cuz, another fun thing we can do is we can guess where they're from by the way they sound. Where do you think he's from? I think he's from New Jersey. No, I'm not. I'm just fucking doing y'all shit. I'm from fucking Virginia. Yeah!

One of the original colonies. Yeah, you're a fucking down south boy. You're gonna like our episode today. Now, what's going on? Do you have a girlfriend? Do you get cracked up by guys? Dude, I'm the dude. I've got a fucking wife and two kids. Wow. My fucking bones don't float. They're dead. Wow. So, cuz, the fact that you

pay for a patron probably upsets your wife. Well, I don't care, because we don't share the same account. Because if you did, I'd probably fucking pull your daddy and take all her money. Yes! This kid's screwed. This kid's funny and screwed. I knew it from his name.

Wink the Shvink, what's been your favorite moment of the podcast? I don't know, man. Itink the Shvink, what's been your favorite moment of the podcast? Uh, I don't know, man. It's pretty much just a banter when fucking Papayani's fucking with you a little bit. You like that, huh? He's kind of in the background

when you're doing still part of it in the background. Oh, shit. Oh, my God. Oh, shit. Yeah. Now, if you had to crack open Mike Emoji Face or Zach Isis, which one would you crack open?

Gun to your head. You got to crack open one. Well, I'm a hairy dude, too, and I feel like fucking ISIS wouldn't judge me because I'm fucking Hungarian a little bit. Yeah. And so we can both take our shirts off and not be self-conscious about our hairy chest and chest of coal. Yeah, you guys

could start a fire together with that. A little bit. A lot of friction would go on. It'd be like steel wool on a battery. Yeah. Don't throw batteries at Hey Bird. What do you do for work, cuz? Dude, I'm fucking hanging out with Julio to do landscaping. yeah don't throw batteries at hey Bert what do you do for work cuz dude I fucking I've met you before I'm fucking

I'm hanging out with Julio to do landscaping wow oh we've called you before no you haven't called me before I just creep on you not like Chris the teacher

I drop one in and then I'm like if you've seen it you definitely didn't read it cause you got better shit going on oh no he yeah he pretended he read it and he just hearted it

that's what happened yeah so you're a landscaping kid. Are you a Mexican kid? No, I'm fucking... What? I'm fucking white. What? Yeah, cuz. We really appreciate your fucking service, man.

I mean, you're one of the legends. Yeah, you're a legend on our page. You know what I do? I do for the kids. I do for the kids. Yeah, absolutely. What part of Virginia are you living? Manassas, or Manassas as they call it. You chew tobacco? I used to. I just quit. Yeah.

Who are you voting for in 2020? Dude, I really... I really don't care because I don't vote. I like that kid. Okay, bye. I think that's our podcast too. We don't take sides. We're just funny. We're just funny. Yeah, it's cool. I can give a shit because I'm poor, so podcast too. We don't take sides. We're just funny. We're just funny.

I could give a shit because I'm poor so whoever I run for doesn't work for me anyway. I don't notice anything. Absolutely. But if you do decide, if you do find yourself at the voting booth in 2020, just make sure your hand goes right. You're like my dad. My dad likes to show off his Trump 2020s. But the thing is he's serious because he's a boy from

Richmond. He was the last segregated class in his high school. As he older, he gets bitter, more racist. Yeah. When you start in Virginia, what do you want these guys to do? We're at a Haybird time limit. We'll call you.

You know how it goes. Maybe we'll call you next month. Maybe we'll call you next year. Maybe we'll call you in a few minutes because we forgot we just talked to you. That's true. Well, you know, get that shit right. Come down to the Napa. I'll fucking show you some history because we've got plenty of them. Yeah. Crack me open. Yeah. All right. Later. Go down to Virginia. Sit in that kid's lap.

His dad's a racist. Yeah, it's what it is. Yeah. I mean, whose dad who's from Virginia isn't going to be a racist. It's just what it is. Yeah. Actually, Virginia is very progressive when you go down isn't going to be a racist. It's just what it is. Yeah. Actually, Virginia is very progressive when you go down there. You see a lot of interracial couples. It's very nice. We were in Virginia. It was beautiful down there.

Remember West Virginia? Remember how gorgeous that place was? The South is never what you should be. Should we call it that Jewish whoopee cushion again and get some shows? Yeah, I already did. And he he told me he's on a two year cycle. I mean, I mean, I know. What are you doing? We're doing you a favor.

How about I just fucking give you a fucking atomic wedgie with your khakis, and how about I step on your fucking throat and just give me the microphone? Yeah, we just may have to do another one. Yeah, he said we're on a two-year cycle. I didn't even respond. I'm going like, Erwin, come on, man. Yeah. I mean, me and Chris are coming down.

We're not coming. You're paying us fucking nothing. You can cancel Chips Cooney for the weekend. I mean, it's crazy. This is Joey. Got a situation with your grandmother, D'Souza. Yeah. Nice.

Funny kid. Okay. I'm going to be you. You be me. Okay. I'm going to be you. Yeah. But you're going to start. I'm going to be you. Yeah. But you're going to start.

I'll start. Okay. Your call has been forwarded to an... Next one. We'll do it for the next one. So I'll be you. Yeah. And then we're also going to do a full episode like that.

Okay. Where you make fun of me. Do we have to do an episode today? Can we just... I want to leave and get some food. Yeah, I do too. I have to poop too. Do we have to do it today?

We're behind, right? We have to do these calls. We just have to do the... The bonus. Bonus. That's it get some food. Yeah, I do too. I have to poop too. Do we have to do it today? We're behind, right? We have to do these calls. We just have to do the bonus. Bonus. That's it. Bonus. Yeah. Do you want to do a bonus on specifically?

We can do the bonus on our phones. We can do a bonus on a general. The only problem is if we don't do our phones, if we do it on our phones, we don't do it now. Mike Emoji Face can't make sure ISIS puts them up. So, okay. Maybe we'll do a bonus on, maybe we could do a bonus. You want to just talk like Mike Emoji the whole time?

Yeah. No, we're going to do a bonus episode like Mike Amodi. We'll do the whole bonus like Mike Amodi. This is Scott Bellacito. Scott Bellacito. Hello? Hey, how's it going? It's the hyenas. How you doing?

It's Chrissy Cackles. What's up, baby? What do you do? Who are you cracking open? This is Giannis Pappas. Giannis Pappas, I struggle. I think I'm gay. Were you spinning the wheel there in Vegas? Yeah. Was I?

Oh, yeah. I was spinning the wheel and I went raw doggy a little too much. Who is this again? What's his name? Scott Bellicity. Fuck it. Scott Bellicity.

Scotty, how you doing? Scotty the Sauce Monkey. Yeah. Where do you live? I'm doing good. I'm doing good. I'm out here in Santa Cruz, California. Yeah.

Wow. We got a lot of California kids. Yeah, a lot. Santa Cruz. Beachtown. SoCal. Yeah. Now, what are you doing right now?

You got your dick tucked back? What are you doing? Yeah. You getting ready to surf? Yeah. Yeah. You know, just. Now, what are you doing right now? You got your dick tucked back? What are you doing? Yeah, you getting ready to surf? Yeah, yeah. You know, just going to get down in the water. Don't get eaten by a shark. Yeah, it's shark week, so be careful of the sharks out there in Santa Cruz by the water.

Yeah, I got to stay away from them. Cuz, what's the best place to get a burrito in Santa Cruz? Oh, there's taquerias everywhere here. Um, but, uh, down, down the street, there's taqueria of Santa Cruz. They got a couple of locations. That's the best place to get a burrito. What's been your favorite moment of the podcast so far? I think, uh, I think the, uh, the episode when, when Venetia first started.

Yeah. That was, that was probably one of the better ones. Interns are wild. But, uh, yeah. And let's be honest, the one with Christian Polanco wasn't great. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

Also new year's, the new year's episode was pretty fricking wild. Neither one of us remember. I don't even remember what that was. I don't remember. Can I ask you a question? Do you think we did an episode on the Battle of Brooklyn already? Do you remember us talking about that

in the Revolutionary War? I don't remember. Okay. No. Alright. Because we think we may have just done the same episode twice. It might have happened. You can do it again. We're okay with it. If you had to get ISIS back to where he comes from and you had to get

Mikey Emoji back over the wall, what creative ways would you get him out? Yeah. Isis back to the Middle East. Yeah. I don't want to send Mikey by a trebuchet. Yeah.

Yeah. Cool. I like that. How do we get Isis back to the sandbox? Getting ISIS back is a good one. Probably by airplane. By airplane. Or we could just tell ISIS that we set up a meeting with him with a record producer in

the Middle East and just get him out there. Yeah. And then he really wants to hear his music. And then we'll just send him right to fucking Syria. He's got to spit bars. He's got to spit bars. Yeah, get him right back to the sandbox. Well, thanks so much for your support, cuz. You gonna crack anything

open tonight or what are you doing? Say that again? You gonna crack anything open? You gonna crack open a girl's few... Me and Giannis been cracking open some brews in my apartment. Not me and Giannis, you. Yeah. You're the one with the drinking problem. I'm going through a lot of my family. Yeah, you know, I might have to move some vegetables and see if I can spin the wheel a little bit. Good for you. Yeah. You're the one with the chicken problem. Yeah, you know, I might have to move some vegetables and see if I can

spin the wheel a little bit. Good for you. Alright, Cousy Wuzzy. Thank you for your support. Thank you for your service. We'll call you again. We're going to start doing full phone call episodes. Okay. We'll check back in a year. Alright, I'll see you later.

This is a trebuchet right here. That's what he wants to throw you over. He kind of wants to throw you over that way that's a good question yeah we can ask him get creative they can get creative nobody's ever going to come up with a better way to get ISIS out than you just did tell them this is me

meeting with a record producer out in the sandbox yeah right meeting with a record producer and it's yeah interesting you gotta wear sandals and go yeah you gotta wear sandals and go and it's it's just in a camp in Syria yeah so one last one Pat Cole

Pat Cole the fans love Steel Pipe Chrissy there's a theme that like they just love when you go wild everyone most of the people always say their favorite moments are always Steel Pipe Chrissy moments. Hello? Hey, what's going on?

It's the History Hyenas, Giannis Poupis and Chrissy Chlamydia. Yeah! Yes! Get the gay out! Yes! Yes! Cuz, where are you from?

I'm originally from Delaware Wow, good state, nobody cares about it Yeah, smoking That's why I fucking left, I had to move to Arizona With all the fucking Yeah, so are you You a smoking Joe Biden kid? Cause he's from Delaware

I guess, sure, why not Yeah, you gotta go with the hometown kid 2020, is your hand gonna go a little to the right? More to the left Yeah, good choice Good choice Cuz, what do you do in Arizona? My students are working construction

Just enjoying life and trying to get through this fucking heat Oh, it's hot out there, right, Cuz? It's like 120 This shit is ridiculous And with the rain and the humidity, it's just nasty. Wow. Yeah, it's fucking brutal what you guys are doing. But I always got that water with me, though. Water?

You always got to walk around with water. Make sure you hydrate or else you're going to pass out on stage in Providence. It's just what it is. You're going to hear all about that in this episode. I heard about that. You good? Yeah, I'm good, man. I'm good. I'm back up and running. We talked about it, you'll hear all about it On the last episode, and funny enough

Chris also has had a few moments Where he's also passed out, so when we come down to Arizona And do a show, you're going to have to stand behind us With a net It's what it is What's been your favorite moment of the potty wotty? What's been your favorite moment of the potty wotty so far? It had to have been

Obviously Pearl Harbor, That's legendary. It's going down in the books. But I'd have to say Nero. Yeah. Nero is good. Wow. Yeah. You know, you can tell the real fans because they know the episodes.

They know the episodes. Yeah. Now, if you had to crack open Mike Emojiface or Zach Isis, which would you do, how, and why? Yeah. Oh, it would definitely be Mike Emojiface. And I would have him fucking ride me because I'm trying to see what other Emoji Faces I can get him to make. You want to see his face while you do it? Great answer.

That's a good one, cuz. Yeah. Cuz, what's your ethnicity? I'm a white kid. What? Now, what would you rather do? What would you rather do? Would you rather be forced to listen to another episode with Christian Polanco or throw on a Nazi uniform and walk through a Jewish neighborhood?

Shit. I'd have to go with the Jewish neighborhood. Yeah, you don't want to listen to Polanco again, right? Because people did not like the soccer episode. Yeah. It's what it is. Yeah, all right. Well, it's what it is.

Just make sure you stay cool out there. Make sure you're hydrated, drink water. Tell your friends about hyenas. And thank you for your service for being a non-tuit. And guess what? We're going to call you again because we're going to start doing all phone call episodes. One extra all phone call episodes a month.

So you'll hear from us again sometime in the future if Chris isn't suiting in jail. If we're not suiting in jail and we've opened up one more Patreon level for a thousand bucks a month. You could throw batteries at HeyBert. It's not funny. See you later.

We love you. Thank you. Who is that again? What was his name? It was Pat Cole. Pat Cole's a good kid. All right. Good kid.

Is that it? That's it. All right. That was a good episode. Go to HistoryHyenas.com. HistoryHyenas.com for everything. Our Patreon is there. Our merchandise is there. Our merchandise is there.

Our podcast episode log is there. You can genuinely do everything you need to do. All History Hyenas, all Bay Ridge boys at historyhyenas.com. ស្រូវតែលាប់ប់ប្រូវតែលាប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប� Bye.