History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - HOW THEY ESCAPED: HISTORY’S MOST INSANE PRISON BREAKS | History Hyenas

Episode Date: September 17, 2026

What actually happens when you try to dig your way out of a high-security prison—and what happens on the yard once you get caught? On this episode of History Hyenas, Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas are breaking down the wild world of famous prison breaks, the strict unwritten rules of prison gang hierarchy, and the bizarre geopolitical reality of racial segregation behind bars. Plus, the boys tackle one of the most absurd prison dilemmas in history: In a system divided strictly by race, which gang does a Jewish person join? (Spoiler: The answer is WILD and completely nonsensical). Grab your shanks, lock in, and get ready for pure, unfiltered chaos. IT'S A WILD ONE, CUZ! Support our sponsors: Try QUO for free PLUS get 20% off your first 6 months when you go to https://quo.com/HYENAS. One app. Every sport. All 50 states. New DraftKings customers, sign up with code HYENAS spend five bucks to get two hundred in rewards within 21 days - includes all markets. https://quince.com/hyenas Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/scs3ncao #CashAppPod Join our Patreon at 👇 https://www.patreon.com/historyhyenas/ Subscribe to the poddy woddy Our YouTube!: https://bit.ly/2ARdDOz HH Clips:https://bit.ly/2YaK2Z8 iTunes: https://apple.co/2UQTHCc Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3fxtsc0 Hyenas Merch!!! https://store.historyhyenaspod.com Follow us Cuz! 🙆🏻‍♂️ Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ 🙆🏼‍♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🐕More Hyenas Website: www.historyhyenasisback.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/historyhyenas/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/HistoryHyenas Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/historyhyenaspod Gambling Problem? Call one eight hundred GAMBLER, one eight hundred MY RESET. Connecticut: call eight eight eight seven eight nine seven seven seven seven, visit CCPG dot org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty one plus. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days OR Trade with DraftKings Predictions to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable Rewards issued as Fifty dollar click-to-claims every seven days for twenty-one days. Terms at d k n g dot c o slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Guys, I got a brand new hour of stand-up material. I'm coming at you. October 8th to the 10th, Helium Comedy Club Portland, Oregon, October 23rd, 24th, Governor's Levitown, November 6th, Syracuse, Funny Bone. Chris D. Comedy.com for Tikiwikis. Guys, you can see me this month in Washington, D.C., September 25th and 26th, Batavia, Illinois, which is right outside Chicago, October 8th through the 10th. And then governors in Levittown, Long Island, November 6th, 7th, L.A., November 11th, Dallas, December 4th, and 5th. San Diego, some European dates up there, Januspapascomody.com for tickets, Patreon.com slash history hyenas for our bonus episode. and to get these episodes ad-free and uncensored. Enjoy this episode right now about prison breaks in the United States.

What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. I'm Chris DeStefano, aka Chrissy Colomari Tits with me, as always, Janis Pappas, aka Yanni Good Hair Day. You want to know what one of my biggest fears is? Hold on, let me guess. One of your biggest fears is that you will eventually fall in, love and leave your family for a trans woman?

That's a big fear. Because it could, it's on the table. By the way, your jaw looks lined up today. I got a nice jawline? You got a nice jawline. Right now is you catch me from a nice angle. Yeah, because you got a nice jawline. I am nice from certain angles.

Yeah. So go ahead. What's your biggest fear? One of my biggest fears has always been doing a crime and going to prison for it. Yeah, me too. Do you ever think about how if someone really wanted to frame you? Yeah. especially now they could

Sure They just easily could Sure They could be like Oh look at this stuff You know Look at your digital footprint You're like I didn't do any of that

They're like they could just hack into you That's what AI could do AI could hack into you Right They could direct you Hack into you And then just Simulate your searches

And the next thing you know You were you were searching How to seduce a three year old At a pinkolicious live show And you're going Whoa No I did not That did not happen

and they go, well, your digital footprint said that it did. Well, there's a book. I forgot what it's called, but the premise of the book is every, every U.S. citizen commits three felonies a day. You told me that. Right? Yeah, book, three felonies a day, something like that, where it's like, you know, even if you go on to, like, somebody's Wi-Fi, like, you know, where you just sign up for this Wi-Fi or whatever, and they didn't give you the password, you've committed a-fellee. Yeah, three felonies a day, how the feds target the innocent. So that's the problem with the United States is we put most, most of our citizens in jail.

What did you do yesterday in the full 24 hours that you think could be a felony? Could be a felony. So one thing. I know Nick committed about seven to ten of them. Seven to ten felonies. What did I do that could be considered a felony? Gay porn, legal. So that legal.

What did I do? I probably was on somebody's Wi-Fi that I didn't, I didn't ask permission to be on. But were you? Right. I don't know. What did I, I, can you Google, Jesse, what some of the most common felonies that we do that we don't know. That we don't realize that we do that. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's. Because according to my wife, I commit like a hundred a day. What? Like what? If you asked her, it would be like, you know, in her mind, what a felony is? It's a little loose with it.

A little, yeah. I guess I didn't tell Jasmine. I loved her as soon as I woke up. If I make a little bit too much noise. I farted in the bed. That's a felony. Yeah. If I can't get back in time enough to go to my child's orientation, that's a felony.

Here we go. Flush the family members of illegal drugs down the toilet. I did that yesterday as I do for most part of my wife's family on a daily basis. Throwing away the mail. Toss out an old roommate or previous tenant's junk mail. I've done that multiple times. I can't believe that's a felony. That's a felony.

Yeah. Calling in silk sick falsely. I've done that. I almost did it on the movie set. Unauthorized computer use. Wait, calling in sick, what? Calling in sick day when you're not actually sick can theoretically be interpreted as a federal crime. Yep.

Called honest service fraud for defrauding your employer. I did not know that. So if Nick ever doesn't show up, we're going to ask him to show us to proof or he's going to jail. Yeah. Yeah. So calling in unauthorized computer use, checking your personal email on a work computer or using a spouse's login with their permission. I did that yesterday to watch Lyon. on Amazon Prime. I asked Jazz what her password

was that she said, I don't know it. I said, what's your fucking password? And I stuck my finger in her butt hole and she gave it to me. Wow. So I actually committed two felonies. That was a sexual assault and that was unauthorized computer use. I am going to go out on a limb and call bullshit on the premise of this book. Wow. Yeah.

No, it's real. It's a CIA spy, the guy that he does podcasts. Yeah, I mean, I'm just going to call bullshit on that. Like, I didn't do any of those things, I think, in the last month. Right. So I'm trying to think of what felony I could have committed. No, but this is what he's saying. The guy, Harvey Silverglate, is what, he's the author, he's saying that we don't even realize we're committing felonies. Like that, his whole point was, his whole point, I'm going to listen to the podcast.

His whole point is, don't be visible. Like, don't let the powers that be even know who you are. The best, the name of the game is to be anonymous because he said if, any, point the powers that be wanted to get you on anything they could because there is something that you did illegally even your tax codes your tax is like they can audit you and they could go dig deep and find there was 18 cents that wasn't accounted for now you've committed tax fraud well here's some good ones um these are still documented laws on the books in the united states in gainsville georgia it is technically illegal to eat fried chicken with a fork yeah it's just what it is so if you're

Chinese in Gainesville, Georgia, you're safe. You're safe. National anthem remixes. In Massachusetts, musicians cannot remix dance to or play a part of the national anthem. So that's a felony. In Kentucky, no ice cream in pockets. It's illegal to carrying an ice cream cone in your back pocket. This was historically used by horse thieves.

They would put ice cream in their pockets to lure hordes away from farms without technically stealing them by force. The problem is, they would also, if I was alive at that time, they would have lured me. Yeah. I would have been chasing and biting their butt. Now, I'll tell you why that law is inhumane. Okay. Because if you're putting ice cream in your pocket, you are definitely someone who has special needs. Yep.

So what are you going to do? Arrest the retarded kid? Right. Because he had the smart idea to save some of his ice cream for later. Yeah. I mean, that's inhumane. It's in. Because there's nobody who has full mental capacity who's going to try to put the ice cream in their pocket.

And Cuzz, make no mistake. If we get a little time, if we get it here early, we're going to go to Van Lue in and I'm going to put my ice cream in your pocket. Now here's another one in Alaska. Camel curfews. It is illegal in Alaska to wake a sleeping bear. Again, I want to say, if you walk up to a sleeping bear and wake it up, you suffer from some level of mental retardation. It's just what it is. How can you throw that guy in a prison, a guy who said, look at that cute beer.

And he walks up and tries to pet a sleeping bear. That is a kid who, unfortunately, definitely does not have full mental capacity. If you're petting a sleeping bear, most like you have ice cream in your back pocket. You're going over with ice cream in your back pocket. Now, that is for Alaska in New York and the gay community. It is advised. We want you to wake us up sleeping bears.

Wake up a sleeping bear, especially if you're a Filipino cub. Yeah. Bigfoot protection in Scamania County, Washington, in 1969, a felony offense to kill a Sasquatch. You cannot kill mythical creatures. You can't do that in Washington. Yeah. So if you hallucinate Bigfoot,

Do not kill your hallucination. You don't want them. Then we have, in Nevada, we have camel curfews, forbidden from riding or driving a camel on a public highway. Well, I could tell you that rule would not fly in Saudi Arabia. I can tell you that that rule is definitely going to be challenged in Dallas soon. Do you think that the meter maids of New York City are eventually going to start to start riding camels down the street? I think there's a good chance we might see someone roll their camel up to the foot washing station. Do you think just how police are on horses?

Do you think we're going to start getting mom down these force out? on camels. It's very possible. We're just doing humor. We're doing a little humor. If you listen, go to patreon.com slash history. I mean, we did a whole episode about Yuma. We did Yuma.

We do Yuma. We do what you call Yuma. They also eat camel meat. Would you try camel meat? I would try anything, because as long as you put a little melted cheese on it. Yeah. Yeah, the way the A-Rabs, I like the way they cook too, is they take a full pot and then they just flip it upside down and dump it on rice.

I like that. And then they pull the pot up and there's just meat. there and then you go at your hands and you pick out the I like it. It's very good. Yeah. Now in New Hampshire, nighttime seaweed theft. It's illegal to collect or carry away seaweed from the beach at night. Again, I want to point out that these laws seem to be discriminating against

the special needs community. Yeah. Now here's the pickle bounce test. I'm going to bring some seaweed home. Yeah. Who was bringing seaweed home unless you think the seaweed is special? Here it is. Here's another kid that a special needs kid made this up. It's in Connecticut. If a pickle does not bounce, officially not a pickle. That's a regulation in Connecticut. Again, special needs. That is something that you're targeting,

you're definitely targeting a community here. In Alabama, it is a crime to wear a fake mustache into a church. If it causes laughter, it disrupts the service. So again, they, and Yuma is illegal in Atlanta within God's world. Guys, can anybody, any of the fans out there, if you live in any of these states that we cited, can you please, please, please? Like if you live in Alabama, can you go into a church with a fake mustache and film it?

Yeah. And can you do that? And then yell patreon.com slash history hyenas. Don't do that. Oh, yeah. Don't do that. Remember people get in trouble for telling the fans to go do stuff. Don't do that.

Oh, we're not allowed to do that. No, I'm not saying we're not allowed to do that. But the thing is we live in a world where someone is sitting there going, this is my new purpose in life. Oh, yeah. Don't do that. I'm going to go try to test the felony laws of Alabama because Chris DeStefano told me to. Okay, so don't do that. Especially in a church, do not do that.

Don't do that. Here's the problem. You're allowed to wear a fake mustache into a church. It becomes a crime. It becomes a crime if people laugh. Laugh at it or it disrupts the service. If it disrupts the service. So that would be a tough one to prove.

Yeah, it's just what it is. That would be a tough one to prove because if I was the preacher at that service, I would use it as crowdwork and make it part of my bit. So the reason why we're looking at these laws is because what we want to do today is, had a really interesting idea for the episode of the history of prison escapes. So that I think is a very, very, very good topic. Now what I always like to ask you, what led you to this topic? Because I was driving past the prison. I was driving past the prison that you could see from the highway. And I got very curious. And I said, uh, what I went. And you started talking to your car. I started talking to my car. That's what you do is you have conversations with your car.

I was having a conversation with my car. And I said, what prison am I passing now? Yeah. And they said, oh, this is this present. It's a medium security prison. And then I got very curious about prisons. Got it. You got your maximum security prisons.

Sometimes your medium security prisms have maximum security wars, wings or whatever. And then you got your, you know, you got your, what do you call? Minimum security. Minimum security. That's where you're going to find, you know. White collar crime. White collar crime. guys like it's almost like the more money you steal right the more cushy your right we sort of reward like

like his Bernie made off was he in a minimum he was in what you call a mini like he's not a threat to society in that way is he dead but he i think uh he's dead and then his son killed himself what it is killed himself he think he hanged himself right okay because he just didn't want to be Bernie the problem the problem is when you're birdie made off son there's no way to stop being Bernie made off son that's the problem that's the problem yeah so he when he went out into the world he said, how can I not be money money? And I have a solution for you that you did not explore. Take the estrogen, pump it in your ass, and become Lucy Madoff.

That's what it is. Change your name legally. Yeah, you could have did it. And then as we say in the Patreon episode, you could be a waiter in Rochester. You could be a waiter in Rochester New York. Okay, so the ones, the big famous ones, we have one called the Great Escape, which I think is an amusement park in the Lake George area. Stalig Luf, the third.

no relation to me. In 1944, allied POWs dug three tunnels nicknamed Tom Dick and Harry. 76 men got out before the Germans discovered the escape. 50 captured escapees were executed by the Nazis. This became the basis for the famous 1963 movie, The Great Escape. Yes. So I never heard of that movie or saw that movie, but it's something that I want to look at. I just liked that these guys had the genius idea to build these tunnels, but then also they had a little euma about it. And they said, let's name these tunnels. Tom Dick and Harry, which is also probably the reason why they got caught, so it's what it is.

It's just what it is. Probably someone screamed, did you come out of Tom, Dick, or Harry? Yeah. Yeah. What you want to do is if you're going to do a prison escape, you definitely want the nicknaming of the tunnels to not be part of the plan because that means you're probably losing focus on one of the more important parts of the plan. Probably if we were alive back then, we would have been the ones who came up with the fun names because we're just trying to do a little. Yuma? We were trying to do a little Yuma. And we would have been doing Yuma as we're getting publicly executed by the Nazis. Exactly. You kind of probably want to say, because someone who is the

smart guy, there was probably one smart guy in this crew who came up with the plan. And then there was one fucking moron who goes, wait, we forgot to name the tunnels. Yeah, it's just what it is. We can't do this unless we named the tunnels. Yeah. And he probably annoyed everybody to the point when he said, fine. We're going to call him Tom Dick and Harry. Yeah. And then we probably would have all gotten killed in here because Jesse would have slipped on a tangerine peel. And Nick's idea would have been once we get out of the tunnels to get on a flotilla and go across the water. So a lot of these escapes happen in prisoner transfers. That's what is.

They happen during a lot of prisoner transfers. Sometimes they happen where a guy will go, I need to go to the dentist or something or whatever. And they take them off campus. Right. I'm sure they got fun names for the jail too. Yeah. Campus or, you know, whatever. Big house.

Yeah. Whatever. The yard. Or, uh, Latter 14. Just cackle that whole part. Yeah. Just because there's a lot of relatives there. Yeah.

Wait that on the Patreon. That's on the Patreon with no context. I like the fact that on the prison yard too, that everyone reverts to just organize them by race. Yeah. That's just what they do. They don't have time to sit around and ask people what their worldview and beliefs are. No. They don't go, wait a second.

We, listen, this guy has the same worldview with me. How come there's no communist gang? Yeah. How come there's no like... It's a good point. Libertarians. It's only by race. Right.

I want to live in a world where these guys put a little bit more thought into their gangs. Yeah. And be like, hey, we're going to do a gang based on something a little more higher in context than just what you're racist. What you're racist? Yeah, these guys are fun guys. Now, what do you do if you were a Jew? Do you join the Nazis? Oh, good.

I think the whites only got one option. Right. I think you got, even if you're a Jewish. What are you doing? That is a very interesting question. If you're Jewish, do you join the Aryan race gang? Yeah. Because whoever's got the Jews got the best chance to escape.

Right. Because that's the guy who's going to be your planner. Right. When Jewish people, they formally declare their faith to the authorities to receive religious accommodations, kosher food, and spiritual support. They figure out of the way. Even when they go to prison, they say, listen. I don't know if you've known the latest stipulations from the United States Constitution

that you need to accommodate just like when I'm a moment. on the flight, everyone is going to have to understand that there's going to be some meals that are kosher. I'm coming into your prison. I need kosher. I need this. I need that. And if you don't abide by what I'm saying, we are going to get litigious.

Yes. We're going to get very litigious. You're going to hear from my lawyer, which is me. Yeah. Most Jewish inmates do not join prison gangs and instead choose to remain independent, often relying on religious exemptions or religious communities for safety. So how do they survive? Like, how does a religious guy?

survive if he's in like maximum security. He gets special treatment. He gets special treatment. He gets to go, hey, I'm a Jew. How does he get to, how does he, how is he not subject to the same danger? Here we go. Go down to one. It says remaining a wood or independent. In many prisons, white inmates who do not want to join a formal gang still fall under the general white or peckerwood umbrella. Peckerwood. So we're just a couple of peckerwoods. So for racial solidarity during riots or major conflicts. Many Jewish inmates attempt to hide their religious identity entirely, keep their heads down and associate loosely. I love the fact that this whole dynamic is still present when you're in prison. In California, they just align themselves to Latinos. They go to the Latinos.

They go documented out light skin or white Jewish inmates sometimes align with or look for protection from Latino factions. Yeah. Rather than risk being targeted by white supremac gangs. Okay. I like that. Yeah, because you're in a little bit of a pickle. If you're Jewish, you're in a little bit of a pickle. Yeah. A kosher dill pickle. Yeah. Because the only Peckwood gang seems to be the Nazis. I think the Nazis are the only white gang. I have no problem getting into the area.

I would, I'd be welcomed. They would, yeah, I mean, they'd roll out the red carpet. Yeah. They'd say our leaders here. Yeah, that's what it is. But the Jews are in a pickle because the only gang that they can join is the Nazis, but by definition, that gang hates them the most. Right.

So they're in a little bit of a pickle. So I advise you if you're Jewish and you go to a maximum security prison, what you're going to want to do is you're going to want to wigger up big big you're going to want to wigger up big I'm talking about rolling with with gold fronts you got to do some or you got to shave your hair in a way that you look Latino you got to do something right because the people you look the most like aren't going to accept you what prison gangs do Jews in the US join we see this on red it then we got somebody said they joined a Jewish person they joined a gang with neo-nazies in jail then revealed that they're a shit. So that

this is fun. That must have been fun, fun, fun, fun. Hey guys. Yeah. Little issue. We've been, you know, listen, I know, we've known each other a long time now. We're all doing, we're all doing 25 to life. Yeah. I think, you know, we can all consider at this point where we're friends. Yeah. At this point we're brothers, blood brothers.

At this point, I think I just wanted to, uh, I can't continue to live with the lie. Right. It's been eating me up. I've been having trouble sleeping. I just want you guys to know. You remember when I was saying, yeah, all Jews, we got to get them. Remember I was saying all that?

I haven't been being completely 100% with you. I'm Jewish. Where's my shank? Is that cool with you guys? I feel like we're close enough now that I can tell you anything. Yeah. I'm a Jew. I'm a Jew.

This whole time I've been hiding the fact that I'm a Jew. I'm a Jew and I've only been eating kosher food and I'm a Jew. And I know this is just going to reinforce your stereotypes for how sneaky we are. Right. And there's nothing I can do about that. Because you are kind of correct. You are kind of correct in this instance. I am being a bit of a sneaky Jew right now.

A little bit of a sneaky Jew by hiding the fact that I'm a Jew. But I just want to be honest with you. I want to be honest with you and I want to ask you a question. Yeah. Grand Wizard. Right. I want to ask you a question, Grand Wizard. If you were in my shoes, what would you do?

Yeah. What would you do? And then they'd go, I know you think I'm doing Jewish mind tricks on you right now. Yeah. Technically that is what I'm doing. Yeah. But you have to understand, I'm in a little bit of a pickle now. Yeah, and here's the thing.

It's not like I don't hate Muslims. I actually do. Guys, we do have some things in common. Yeah. Chrissy, today's episode is brought to you by Quo, spelled QUO, the business phone system built so you never miss a call. I hate missing calls. I love a quo. That's why today's episode is brought to you by quo, spelled QUO. Business phone built so you never missed a call. I just wanted to repeat what Yanni said. That's what we need to do. And that's why today's

episode is brought to you by Quo. Spelled QUO. Yeah, because money is on the line. Money's on the line. All your calls, text and voicemails live in one place so anyone on your team can pick up a conversation, see the full history and respond fast. Q's the number one rated phone system on G2, trusted by over 90,000 businesses who rely on it to stay reachable and look professional every single day. Guy, money's on the line. Always say hello with Quo.

Try Quo for free. Plus get 20% off your first six months when you go to Quo.com slash hyenas. That's QUO.com slash hyenas. Because football's back. My job, our Giants looking real nice. Yeah. Draft King Sports app is now live in all 50 states. One app, every sport, all 50 states. New Draft Kings customers sign up with Code Hyenas.

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sports book predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability varies by state. And just want to tell you that the crown is yours. So if you got a gambling problem, call 1-800-Gambler, 1-800-Mi-Reset. In Connecticut, you call 888-78-9777. Visit ccpg.org on behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. You bet a tax pass-through may apply in Illinois 21-plus void in Canada. Do that. I joined a gang with neo-Nazis in jail then revealed, yeah, that Newsweek article. Let's see what, yeah, there he is. I mean, how did that guy? Yeah, so that kid

got away with that. Yeah. First of all, he's a Jew, so he can't be buried in a Jewish cemetery. Yeah, he's got tats. He's got tats. All right, so let's go. Let's see, he got addicted to heroin in college. It happens. Yeah. You know, oxycodone, you know, whatever. You do that, go down.

Drug addiction. How do you think he got caught? You think they caught a, finally, he was hiding his piece and they caught a, caught a, you view of his piece and he was cut. How do you think that's probably what it is? Or do you think he had a ham and cheese sandwich and he just slowly separated the cheese? Yeah. Took it off the sandwich. And then they said, why are you doing that? He goes, yeah, I'm allergic to cheese. Something like that. But then they saw him eating the cheese separately. And they go, are you a Jew?

Yeah. Did you separate your meat and cheeses? How do you think it happened? I think maybe somebody walked into his room and he had one of those bowls on his head. That's what happened. And they said, what are you doing? Is that a yarmaca? What is going on? This is how I eat my breakfast. And they said, whoa. So what happened is he got into a fight at a Panda Express in L.A. And a homeless guy mugged him and stole cell phone. Fought and took a knife out and he asked for my phone back.

The police came and he ended up going to jail. They charged him with assault with a deadly weapon and it was going to get him a year and a half in prison, which he didn't mind because he was oxycodone and homeless. Yeah. But he didn't want the violent felony. So the public defender worked out a deal where he would just receive a six-month sentence. Charges got dropped, but he requested a six-month violation in exchange, blah, blah, blah. He'd been to jail many times before, but only for three or four.

four days. All right, so let's go back. Let's go down a little bit. So he's in jail. He's very scary. They're black gangs, Hispanic gangs, white gangs. Some people in the white gangs have swastikis on. I'm pretty serious. And that just doesn't feel great for a Jew. That's just, that was like, whoa. So he said, I knew that I had to join the Peckwoods. Okay. A notorious white supremacist gang. Wait, I need to know what's the difference in the Peckwoods into Nazis. We're going to find out. Yeah, we're going to find out. So he said he was, he was half Jewish at birth, and he has a Jewish last name. So he was a little fearful. His plan was to...

Now when you're Jewish and you're a little fearful, that means you're a lot fearful. He goes, my plan was to pretend I was German since my last name is Yiddish, so pretty similar sounding. It's probably not politically correct to say this, but I also don't look like a stereotypical Jewish person, at least in the eyes of a neo-Nazi. He goes, he saw a crackhead from Skid Row, weighed 130 pounds. You know, that's what he was at the time. He just didn't connect that.

He was a Jewish guy, so he just started going with it. Three or four weeks he played along, but then he realized there was no need to. He never heard anything racist or anti-Semitic. there was another man named Lou. He was 50 years old, and every day he would get a different meal than everyone else's special meal on a blue box. I was curious, looked in the garbage, and there was Hebrew lettering on the blue box, so I knew Lou was Jewish. I asked Lou if he was, and he said, yes, that's why he gets a kosher meal. Then this kid said, I'm Jewish too, but he didn't really care.

Wait, so this kid was getting the kosher meal while he was in the Pickerwoods? No, no. He didn't know that being in the Pecklewood. This other guy, Lou was getting the Jewish kosher meals. So this kid seed it, even though he's lying, say he's part of the Pecklewoods. He said, but these other guys getting Jewish meals, I wonder if I can. So he said he thought, he asked the guy, he asked Jewish Lou, kosher, kosher blue box Lou. And he goes, I said I had one shot caller, kind of gang leader.

And the guy, he said he told the guys that he was German. When he came in and now he's thinking, but he really wants a kosher meal. Yeah. This is what he's saying. He said the kid wants a kosher meal. So he said he asked Lou, what he thought about the consequences would be of revealing that he was a Jew. And Lou said, well, they're not going to care that you're Jewish, but they are going to care that you lied. So I would just go talk to the shot caller privately and work this out.

This kid said he expected a very violent repercussion for lying because there are violent repercussions for everything from not washing your hands after using the bathroom to get in court sharing food with another race. So you can't do that. So in other words, the Peckywoods wouldn't like my family dynamic because I'm always sharing food with other races. You're going in with a handicap.

Yeah. You're going in with a handicap. You would have to conceal. Right. You'd have to conceal that fact. Unfortunately. You'd have to, every time, You'd have to call your wife a different name.

Yeah. You'd have to... I'd have to say, well, like, what I did when I first moved into that now, which is true for, like, the first month or two, I'd just told... I told my neighbor that she was Italian. Yeah. I just wasn't sure if what the deal was with Puerto Ricans. But I talked to the shot caller.

He said he was pretty angry that he lied, but at the same time he said, listen, I'm half Armenian. I'm not even fully white. We don't even really care. There's just rules and we have to follow them. Okay, so... So these guys, yeah. They just go by a different...

They go by a different constitution in there. Yeah, he goes, listen, has a shock call if it gets out that I'm not enforced with the rules, then I'm secretly Armenian. I'll get stabbed in the yard. He goes, so you lie, you got to come clean for all the boys, and it's not a big deal. Just when you get the kosher meal, make sure that the white guys get preference over buying it. If no one white wants to buy the meal, then you can sell it to other races. Once it came out that I was Jewish, I expected zero anti-Semitic hate. It was more of a fascination.

A lot of these people I never met a Jewish person, they picture Jewish people as owning banks and companies and potentially even the jail. go down so when they saw this skin roll homeless Jew a lot of light bulbs went off about their preconceived ideas immediately they asked what are you doing here can you make a phone call

don't you know a lawyer I said I said no I'm Jewish my dad was a heroin out of carpet not all Jews are what they think you are now this is at the point where they thought this is where they figured

that he was probably lying about being a Jew for some reason because they couldn't believe that he was a Jew it opened up a lot of conversations with these people they were fascinated with the concept that Jews were lawyers, so I started getting a lot of requests to consult people on your cases.

I had to tell them, listen, I'm a carpenter crackhead homeless guy. I'm not a lawyer. Do you think a lot of the black inmates started passing their demo to him, saying that they could maybe take a peek at this? He said they didn't care. They wanted to go over their cases with me. There was almost some soft anti-semitism, but it was mostly playful. They thought I had mystical powers.

I mean, this kid is not even trying to be fun. He's just saying what it was. They thought it was a mystical Jew lawyer. They thought it was a mystical Jew lawyer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just what it is. That's hilarious that they're like, you go over the case at me. Well, this is the kind of, when you think about it, this is the kind of reaction you would maybe expect, though, when you think about it from people who have this level of sophistication and thinking.

Right. So I can understand that this might be the reaction where they go, now you're my lawyer. Are you Jewish? Okay, well, now you're my lawyer. Yeah, it's just what it is. So scroll down a little bit. Let's see if there's anything else. Yeah.

Yeah, the people I was with had never really interacted with Jews. At least they never knew a Jew who was on their level. But they could see, I'm in here with you. I did some crazy crime just like you. I smoked meth, just like you. I come from a broken home, just like you. They were fascinated with that. Yeah.

So this guy did a lot to stop anti-Semitism. He said I saw little violence between races. If someone from one race attacks a person from another race, it's a requirement that everyone joins in on the fight and it turns into a race riot. A Mexican gentleman was giving a face tattoo to a white guy who made a comment saying he didn't think it was a very good job. and they got it to a fight. If a Mexican guy was in a fight with a white guy, it was a requirement that every white person to every Mexican joined the fight.

I was hanging out with my Mexican friends at the time. We were making food and the race fire kicked off. We all just kind of looked at each other and one of them gave me a nod and hit me a few times lightly. So it's just what you have to do. You have to do it even if you don't want to do it. Yep. Because of my small stature, they would use me as an abatement, two big guys and one sort of smallish medium guy. I was used a lot for that and I didn't enjoy it. What does that mean? When they punished someone for breaking rule, my shot call would get three guys to beat up the rule breaker.

So what does that mean he was used as an abatement? What does that mean? I don't understand that. Like, you know, theoretically, like, it's the rule is three guys got to beat you up if you break the rules. So they would have two big guys do it. And then they throw you, you know, they throw the one little Jew in to hit you a little bit. So it, you know, wasn't that bad. Right, right.

Because it wouldn't just give you three big guys. Right, right. I had to find people for breaking very stupid rules such as sharing food with a black person, a rule I think is ludicrous. To be honest, my shot call, I thought it was, oh, ridiculous too. He told me personally that he shared food with black people all the time. He just kept it a secret. Yeah, that is sort of you got to keep that in the closet there.

Yep. You got to keep that in the closet, which is very strange in prison. Yeah. You can fuck another man in his asshole. Yeah. That can be out in the open. Yeah. But if you share food with somebody of another race, you really want to, you don't want anyone to know about that.

He said, I had a pretty good relationship with the Mexican shot caller, had become very intrigued by an aspect of my Jewish experience of jail. I'm not a practicing Jew. I never was, and no one of my family really is. But when you get the kosher meal, they also give you a yama. for some reason. When the other inmates saw the yarmaca, they were mesmerized by this magical Jewish hat. The people who ran the world wore these hats, they said, and thought now they were around one in the jail cell. Right. It just was breaking their bane. Their brains were broken

going like, wait a second, why aren't you running this world? The Mexican shot caller would request to wear it when he gambled to bring him financial luck. It's just what it is. It's just what it is. It kind of started, it started sort of a buzz in jail, and eventually lots of people were requesting to wear it. Even the neo-Nazis wanted to wear it when they were. gambling. I asked him to treat it with respect. Not because I'm religious, but I thought my ancestors are religious, don't be disrespectful. The amount of respect they had for this yarmaca was actually disturbing. The fact that a Nazi with swastika tattoos would be so polite about a Jewish yamaca. He stayed friends with some of these people. He stayed in touch with some of these people

in jail. So that's funny. They thought they referred to it as a magical Jewish hat. Yeah. That they thought would bring them luck. Not all white people were Nazis. In fact, a small minority identified as neo-Nazis most just identified as Peckerwoods. So what we're seeing here is like when you put a whole bunch of people who don't really have the potential to think things through together, what emerges is sort of a kind of a ridiculous mythology. Right. This is almost like going back in time and seeing like what old tribes used to probably

do as far as like they probably you know like a Jew if a Jew entered like an old tribe they'd be like oh my God like this is like a mythical creature we got to worship it they would see yeah yeah so you know what we're doing to call because I have a family member T.T. Jerry who served quite a lot of time in prison so I want to ask him

about what his experiences with Jews were and escaped from Danamora and this is funny because you know even though he was a guy who went to prison you know the Jewish part of him always remains because then he goes on to say I was introduced to a community recovery but they experienced some terrible health consequences in my period between going out of jail

and getting into his treatment center. So even though he was a tough Jew went to jail, he still had some health concerns. He had some health concerns. Yeah, here we go. Let's see if Jerry picks up. Can you keep scrolling too? Good. Hey, Jerry.

Yeah, you got the test load? No, not yet. We're going to get it today. I'm actually on the podcast right now. We're honest, and we wanted to ask you a question. Okay. Okay, so first of all, we're doing an episode about prison escapes, and we wanted to know, were you ever in prison with any Jewish people? Oh, yeah, I used to be, I used to be, um, how you call that when you eat Jewish meal?

Kosher. Well, I used to be in coach. I used to hang out with them, and I once time I signed up for kosher meals, and I used to hang out with the Jews in the diner eating kosher food. Wow, yeah, because, and would you, would they wear the yarmacas and everything? little hats? Yeah, they were the yarmulka. I wore it too one time. Yeah? Why did you put it on? And they started and they started criticizing me the other guys and they were going to beat me up because I was wearing one of those little hats and I took it off. Right, because, you know, that's what we're learning about how like, because it's all about race. So you have to be with the Latinos so they didn't want you to be with the Jewish people, right?

They were telling me, you're fucking gay and everything. You're fucking transgender and you're wearing one of those hamikas. Take that shit off. Those Hanukkah hats. Yeah. Pretty called it. You know, the Jews people were criticizing me because I had one of those and I was a transgender that I couldn't fucking worry. Yeah.

Yeah. So, okay, yeah, because we're learning here about how Jews we were wondering because they can't be in the white gangs because, you know, the white gangs. They have their own little gang. They hang out all by themselves. They got their own diner. At a certain time for lunch, they go by themselves to the diner, like around 12 o'clock. They eat lunch by themselves.

Yeah, just a little kosher. Jew meals, right? Yeah, they don't eat with everybody else. Yeah, so, and that, but they were nice to you. So almost like being on a plane. They were nice. Some of them got down too. Really? You hooked up with a couple of them? Yeah, like two of them. Nice. Yeah, they love to get down. They love to get down. Yeah.

And what kind of crimes did they commit? Was it mostly business stuff or some of them were violent? No, they weren't violent. They were kind of quiet, peaceful people. Right. Yeah, but it's interesting how how, you know, if you got associated with that, your Latinos wanted to beat you up, right? Not really the Latino, the same Jewish people.

They were telling them to take that shit off. Wow. They don't run that in the, how you call that, in the group. Yeah, you got to study. And what did you say, or what did you say when they told you to, when they told? I'm taking shit on. Some of you guys are fucking freaks, too. What the fuck you're talking about?

It's a good point. That's a good point. Yeah, fucking freaks. Now, were you, was your gang, were you with the Latinos? Or were you with the gays? No, I was with the gay. I used to run the gay people. Right, the gay's people. Now, okay, so that's another loophole. If you're gay, does it matter what race you are? If you're gay, you could be any race and be in the gang?

No, it doesn't matter if you're in a gang and it kind of race you are. No, I'm saying the gays. Like, you would have your gay crew, it was white, black, Spanish, it didn't matter. No, it was all kind of type. White, black, Jewish, Jamaicans, all kinds. Is that the safest gang to be with the gay gang, would you say? I guess so, yeah, I think so Yeah Okay Yeah, because people didn't look for no problems

I gave people were very friendly And all that We're just looking for guys, you know You know Yeah That's it Just guys to suck off I think that's the only group

That could kind of flow into all the groups We were looking to make them feel good Yeah, that's nice Yeah, so I get it Yeah, you had a nice time There was times in jail Well, you said you just had a nice time, right?

I mean, he was kind of living in like the West Village of the jail. I just lived my life in there while I was in there. Right. Okay. So now we want to ask you because we're talking about escapes and the escape from Dan Amora. You were there when the inmates escaped?

Yeah, when those two guys escaped when the teacher from the sewing teacher was the one that set it up and they escaped because she set it up for them. Do you remember that lady? Yeah, I remember that lady. She was kind of chubby. She was white. Yeah, I remember her. And do you remember like,

Was she always like, did you, when they escaped, were you like so, were you like, oh my God? Or like, did you know that they were going to escape? No, I didn't know. Nobody knew that they were going to escape. But did you know they were hooking up? Did you know he was banging the, the... I didn't know nothing that they were hooking up. Nobody knew nothing.

Wow. So let me... So when they escaped, though, that next day, you guys probably weren't allowed to leave yourselves at all, right? They had that shit on lockdown. The hotel was locked down, like, for over the week. So you guys were kind of mad at them probably, right? Like they fucked your shit up.

Well, no, we weren't really mad because shit happens all the time. The jail is locked up all the time, but shit happens. Were you rooting for them to not get caught? Everybody was happy that we were escaping. Yeah. Everybody was helping. Yeah, everybody. Yeah.

Yeah, because we, yeah, we learned all about it because one guy got killed by the cops and the other guy, they sent his ass right back to jail. When one came back to jail, but he didn't call the population, they locked them up and a segregation. Like, he couldn't go out. nowhere, so you never saw him again. Yeah, the other one that made it back, though. He got killed.

He got killed, yeah. Yeah, no, it's true. All right, good, yeah. The escape from Dan Amora. So what else do you remember about it? About what about the escape? Yeah. Nothing that just got like the jail done.

Then it's not a searching every cell, everybody's cell. To see if we had anything they had to do with the escape and all kind of shit, questioning people. They need to take everybody out of the sale and question them. I wonder if they arrested that woman, too. who was involved in it all. I think she got seven years, though. Damn.

What do you think if me and Janice, you know, Morisa, got sent to prison, what would your advice be for us? Oh, my God. Yeah. Just to chill. Be by yourself. Be kind of friendly. You know, I mean, you don't have no problem in jail. Do you think no matter what, if we did a couple years in prison, eventually everybody gets into a fight at least once it's going to happen?

Oh, yeah. You're going to get into a fight no matter what. It always happens once or twice. Because they're going to test you, right? I mean, it's not they're going to test you, but there's always assholes. You know, there's a lot of assholes in jail, you know, so. Yeah, that tracks. You're going to have to put on your boxing girls no matter what.

Should we? Or you're going to have to watch some underwear. That's it. Wash some underwears. That's another way out. So wash some underwear. Would you say that me or Yannis would be, would we be better if we join the gay gang? That's what I was going to say or join us in the gang, the gay gang.

Okay. That's where we would end up, I think. That's what we would end up, yeah. I think being artist, we fall under that umbrella. Are you coming up to the house today? When are you coming over? I got my car fixing. They got to fix my car because remember when Ellie told you was going to shut on?

Like, he kept on shaking along? Yeah. Yeah, it's going to figure. That car is ready to go down the drain. Oh, shit. I'm sorry. All right. We're going to have to get another one then.

No, you have to get another one. I have to get it myself. Okay. Well, you know what? When we get the Tesla, we're going to send the Tesla to come and pick you up. Yeah, by itself. By itself, yeah. I'm throwing out the first pitch of the Mets game on Thursday.

You want to come? Oh, wow. I was going to go on there tomorrow because I wanted to hang out on there for my birthday. Oh, that's right. Your birthday's Friday. Yeah, I want to hang out with Jackson and the kids. All right, so yeah, so come over then. And the plumber, the plumber who you think is hot is over there.

Oh, really? Yeah, she loves her in brothers plumbing. She likes that guy. I'm probably dressed up like Kitty Jerry. I haven't dressed up. Yeah, it's your birthday. let it hang out. All right.

All right, Chris. All right, bye, Jerry. We're going to be in the house tomorrow. All right, then. I'll see you tomorrow. All right, bye. There you go. That's from T.T. Jerry.

Inside info. You got a very interesting life. That's what it is, yeah. That man was in the front pew at my wedding. He was at the front pew at your wedding. He was a man at the wedding. He's been a man since 2021. He's never seen him.

He's taking a break from the drag. He's taken a break from the drag. And, you know, he does actually, you know, he's lived a very, you know, kind of interesting life because one of, you know, one of Jasmine's other family members, one of her nephews is in jail. What can you do? So, and he was on the phone with him at my house the other day. And he was just giving him advice about how to stay, you know, how to stay sane in prison.

I was like, it's very, you know, kind of was very intuitive. I mean, the kid just lived through. They put him in solitary confinement for two years. To be honest with you, you know, body looks pretty good there. Body looks pretty good there. Yeah, body looks pretty good there. I mean, in jail, I think that he was probably very, she was probably very sought after. Got banged out.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. T.T. She mail bag. So we had a little thing where people would email T.T. and ask the questions. But we have to stop because most of the questions were, let me see you tits. Let me see your dick and balls. That's what it was. So Jerry said he got a little tired of answering.

that. He didn't want to deal with that. He didn't want to do that. Yeah, he didn't want to do that. Because we talk about it, what seems like every week, but quince is the only place that I buy stuff from. I love quince, dude. It's literally, I cannot believe how cheap the clothes are. You know, I'm just trying to save money at this point in my life for various reasons. And this, look at it. Yeah, there you go. That's quince. And it looks good in a quince shirt. That looks quince. Yeah. Do I look too skinny or do I look meaty enough? Do I look hot for you? Because I want to feel hot in my quint shirt. Whenever you got quince on, you always look hot. Do I have a lollipop head?

Don't I look okay. I'm not losing too much weight. I'm on the... What is it? You're on the cusp. I'm on the cusp. You're on the cusp. I like you a little meteor.

Do I look muscular? You look... Not right the second. Right now the second you're looking... But if you sit like that... Yes, that's better. You need more space down here to even it out. Got it.

When it's in like this... It does it. It looks like it. It looks like a lollip. If I look like a lollipop. If I stand up here like a lot of... this. I look musco. Yeah. You're on the cusp. I'm on the cusp. You look skinny. I look skinny, but I'm

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roundups, overdraft coverage, and discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit Cash.app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. Yes, download the Cash app today. Make your money work for you. Visit their link in our bio. So, Escape from Dan Amora. It was a great movie out about it with Beniso Del Toro. And it really was very fascinating because they manipulated this guard, who was probably special needs, who probably had ice cream cones in her back pocket and was bouncing pickles.

and she was able to seduce, this guy was able to seduce her and he got her out. Yeah. He got her out of the prison. And this happened in upstate. Do you remember? I remember when this was happening like live. I don't remember.

This happened in upstate New York because very similar to when Andrew Kuhnani, who killed Versace, when he was on the loose, I got very nervous that they were going to come kill me. Yeah. That's just what it is. So when this guy was out running around. Why did you think they were going to come kill you? Andrew Koonanan? Yeah.

Because I knew even back then. Why would you? Come get you, though. I don't know. I don't know. I remember being 10 years old and then seeing him on the news, on the lamb, and they said he was somewhere in like North Carolina or something like that. And I remember asking my mom if he was going to come and kill us.

And my mom said, please stop it. And she said, you're also too all to be sleeping in my bed. Some people just have leaky roofs. Andrew Cananan had a little bit of a, he had a couple shingles missing from his roof. Yeah. Unfortunately, yeah, he had to go kill Johnny Versace. Yeah, it's just what it is. Some people just have to do things.

Now, wait a second. With the escape from prison, you had told me in the car, you had told me in the car that you said that there's a couple of inmates who've escaped and never gotten caught. There are a few that have never gotten caught, never been accounted for. One guy escaped, went back into prison, got caught, then escaped again. And then the second time he learned his lesson. And he's like, they're not going to catch me this time. And they still don't know where he is.

and a few of them have got away. My thing would be with prisons, if you really don't want anyone to escape, why don't you just have all the prisons on like, you know, barges, like ships and just keep them in the middle of the ocean? Well, I think that's kind of what the idea with Alcatraz was. Right. Yeah. I mean, they're still on an island where theoretically you could swim to safety,

but there's sharks in the water. Yeah. Well, the thing is, it's very uncommon. It's a very hard thing to do, which begs the question to me, why are we not giving these guys a little bit more wiggle room when they achieve it? Right. So let's be honest.

It's so hard to break out of jail that if you do, give them a week. Right. Let them get a week before you start hunting them. Right. Make it fun. Make it fun. Let the news story build. Let the terror go through the communities.

Do it like a live Netflix event. Yeah. Just make it like a live Netflix event. Make it like a 24-hour coverage like, you know, Truman Show type shit. Turn it into reality show. But you got to give these guys a little bit of a fucking head start. Yeah, yeah. Pay them back in honor what they accomplished.

I agree with that. Getting out of the jail deserves a little bit of a reprieve on the other end. We're going to give you seven days to go. And then we start playing a game called Hide and Go Seek. And it's some of the highest rated shit you'll ever see. We go try to fund them, you know, dove soap, you know, start running your commercials. Let's go. Get the history hangers out there announcing it.

Announcing it. Get T.T. Jerry has a live looking. Let's go. And then we're talking about we're creating a lot of jobs and we'll give all the money to charity. Now this is, we give all the money to the people in the certain neighborhoods that are very nice, but they can't afford their rent. Yeah. We pay their rent. Yes.

We'll pay your rent. Now, this is actually, I don't know if this has been thought of, I'm sure it has been. But what about when you go into prison, I know this is inhumane and not right? When you go to prison just for the time you serve, what if they just put a tracking device in your skin like they do with dogs? So even if you do escape, they know exactly where you are. Yeah, that's actually a... And then you get it removed when you get out. Yeah, that's actually an idea only a German,

where the German brain can come up. It kind of is not, it's an easy thing. That's, it's, hello. So, hi, my name is Christopher. I have an idea here. So I was playing with my lower animal species dog, and I realized, oh, similarly, you have tons of other low. species here. Why not we just put

the same tracking device in this animal that we haven't that animal? Yeah. And then also for dishes, why don't you have a ball? Just gives them the ball and make them eat the food on the floor and make sure that you keep the animals

under your control all the times. And if the animal goes wrong if the animal has an issue and then you have a tracking device. So hunt him down and kill. Yeah. Yeah, that is only an idea a German can think of.

What you're basically saying is, why don't we treat these guys like dogs and put a tracking device in their heads? Yeah, and so if they escape, we can find them easily. Yeah, or not even in their heads. I don't want to be like that, but if you put it, you know, put it in their butt cheek, put it under their toe. Some are fun. Yeah.

Yeah, and then the Jewish ones, you know, you don't have to track them. You do something else with them. The Jewish ones. Wei Song Xien. The Jewish ones should be separated into prison, but not for Koshimi. Yeah Lad of 14 Put that on the Patriot

Yeah So we have Frank Morris John and Clarence Anglin from Alcatraz That was a big one They escaped Nobody knows how they did it They did it on a homemade raft

They were never found These guys were never found Because they went and they lived their lives They made it to the Caribbean They made it to Mexico They found themselves a couple of seigneuritas Yeah And they just lived a completely different life

Now do people say Does Reddit and all that say that they most likely drowned. And their bodies never got found. Because wouldn't their bodies have been found at some point washed up or something? Yeah, I choose to believe that these kids made it. Yeah. These kids made it.

I'm rooting for Frank Morris and then the brothers John and Clarence Anglin. They made it because give them respect. They were in Alcatraz too. Somehow they figured out of way and nobody knows where they are. Then we got Percy LeFroy Mapleton in Australia. This was in the 1880s when I imagine it was a lot easier because they didn't have any cameras. Same with the 60s. An English criminal escape custody disappeared.

He became one of Australia's most enduring fugitive mysteries. These guys, but here's the thing. These guys didn't kill again. No. These guys didn't commit any crimes again. They learned their lesson. Well, the proper motivation was they knew if they did, they might get caught. So maybe the best way to prevent these guys from committing further crimes is let them all escape.

Yeah. Because they know if they commit a crime, they'll be caught. They'll be caught. Yeah, it's a very good point. I'm just using the same thinking that we have seen. jail people use when it comes to magical Jews. Yeah. Well, they said that it's another guy, Glenn Stewart Godwin,

California in 1987, escaped from Folsom State Prison and disappeared, later suspected of resurfacing in Mexico but never conclusively recaptured. Interesting, that kid could still be alive. That kid imagine. Maybe he's on the Patreon. He might be on the Patreon. Then we have Lester Eubanks. He

escaped while he was on prison furlough and he vanished. I mean, Wydie Bulger just got found like 10 years ago. Yeah, but he never escaped. Did he? He was just wanted. He was just wanted. But that's crazy.

That kid was just living in an apartment in San Diego for like 30 years. I know. And his life looked kind of boring and miserable. Right. He probably like... Well, it had to be. Had to be, dude. So that's...

What I'm saying is... He spent his whole life in that apartment. Yeah, I mean, the guy couldn't do crime anymore. No. Because he'd get found out. So it is an effective way to prevent crime. Yeah. Which is pretty good.

So, but it's not a very common thing. A lot of these guys get caught again. Yeah. A lot of these guys get caught. That's why I'm saying, like, give him a little bit of a head start. Give a little bit, and you don't necessarily hate the tracking device idea. I don't hate the tracking device idea, but it makes it a little too easy. It takes the fun out of it.

Right, right. Takes the fun out of it a little bit, yeah. We got to, we got to keep the purity in the game. Yeah. You know? Yeah, I mean, it is, it is interesting. But I share in your fear of going to prison, it's just not what I want to do. Well, also, I do want everyone out there to know that if you do purchase a Tesla and you

and your wife both have access to the Teslas, she can see where the car is at all times. It's just what it is. Just make sure you go to work and you go home. Yeah, because she will know, it's on the app. It's on the app. She can just look at the map and see where your car is. It's just what it is. Yeah, which probably is good for everyone.

But I can do that with my, I can do that with my car now. Yeah, so there you go. I can do that on the app. Yeah. So there you go. And she has access to that app, right? She does not have access to that app. Well, that's the difference with the Tesla.

If you give her access to your car, she has access to know where the location. Well, yeah, no, we're both on the car. We're both on the insurance. We're both co-owners of the vehicle. Yeah, so then that's just something to know for everyone out there. Just know it, love it, learn it. Thank you guys for listening. Of course, at the end of every episode, we do patreon.com, says, history hyenas.

We have our newest members of the matriarchy who come on board. And the thing is when you join the matriarchy, there is no escaping. No. You're just in and you can't get out. You cannot get out. You're in for $5 a month. Okay, so the newest members, we got Trump's beef curtain neck pussy. it was it was just it was all over the place yeah yeah it was all over the place but it was you know

he went for the shock he was yeah that that's that's a common uh open micer move okay i'm gonna i'm gonna try shocking and laugh yeah it's gotta still be good guys okay holden tuddillks hold in holden two dicks yeah and t u d i k s yeah he spelt it like a real name holden two dicks a nice little chicken finger like that good one real life hood white um call me a f f f f f but Not because I'm a firefighter, cuz. Okay. Two in the ding. Whoops.

Wos. Walked into one. That's a slur. Mm-hmm. That's a slur. Yeah. Is it too much to ask for weppa in the morning again? Not a bad idea.

O.G. Patreon, no-nameer, trust, mush more than Jess. Okay. What does that mean? Oh, Mike Mush. Just took a little shot at Jesse. Yeah. All right. What happens?

I went to a World War II museum in Berlin and all the good guys look like Chrissy D. Way Song Xien. Just what is. is that you know i think that's just more of a historical observation yeah nothing to do with me he looked in small black and white photos and he said that looks an awful like of a awful looks awfully like a comedian yeah yeah yeah yeah jason fontein michael w mohammed my foreskin didn't stand to chance rashad it just didn't i mean you know certain religions you're born into the foreskin just doesn't stand a chance uh jasca van alst then we got t t t's fulgers can that's crazy that this happens every time

Like we're talking about something and then it's just like How about this morning when we both had 43 miles to go at the same time? That's why we're on different highways. Danny Dominguez, Johnny Maracas, Mike Bastone, my wife's new natties, aka amenities of maternity. Put them on the list. Nice. I mean, there we go.

That's what we're talking about. Jacob Kaplan, Michelle's big juicy balls. Put them on the list. Yes, that's what it is. Then we got here for the content. got not a mussy but we'll take a prayer rub and tug and not a mussy but we'll take a prayer rug rub and tug victim of a bad read yeah what do we do with that how about give it to me one last one more time not a muzzie but we'll take a prayer rug rub and tug it's not quite there

all right yeah we're going to direct slur it chrissey's drag name is lindsay tard yeah okay it's a good try not a fan of anal but these hemorrhoids aren't going to push themselves back in the list That's just what it is. Put him on the list. And it looks like a woman. Yeah, you'll never have a doctor tell you that, but technically it is a solution. Yeah, it's just what it is.

James Williams, Owen McCormick, straight to the back. White Walk, close the gate behind me. Okay, wait a second. So, White Walk. White Walk, close the gate behind me. So that is a good one because of what he's basically saying, in our parlance, White Walker is Mexican because he was born beyond the wall. He's on the other side of the wall.

So he's basically said is he immigrated here and then turned Republican and closed the door. So I'm going to Drexler him just because you have to know a lot. But I just want to honor that that was a really good one. Yeah. Greg 87, A.D., Kyle, A.R. E.G.D., Josh D. I pump off to 1994, Rosie O'Donnell. She wasn't bad at 94. Yeah.

And the fantasy of flipping a lesbian is nice. Yeah. Gets a Drexler. Spencer Carlson. Then we got Jeffrey Dahmer's cookout extravaganza. Whoa, that seems like it's misplaced. Yeah? Yeah, we did that a long time ago.

Then we got Horn Pub, hashtag screwed in Lewis Barry, Pennsylvania. Uh-huh. Roar X-D. Duregs are frisbees for Leroy's, now mean boys. Put him on the list. Yeah, it's just what it is. Put him in the list. Yeah.

He made it rhyme, too. And he makes a good point. Austin. Then we got loved Yanni in the Odyssey. Okay. Yep. Chicken finger. Matthew Mandragon.

uh e b tisha's dollar store wig fine italian leroy cuisine only at come on jeezer fucking christ that was bad tuna

then we got running a train on ellen page and by that i mean using her chest scars as train tracks ladder 14 way song she ain't just uh just sheer inventiveness no can i not

Put it? Put it. Put it? I mean, it can't win. It can't be up in lights, but you have to honor. Yeah. You have to honor the originality. You just have to honor it. I'm a squeak because I didn't want to be right. Jesus. Jesus. Way song she ain't. Fumes with a view, aka Akash Singh's Corner Couch.

Lad of 14. Okay. Okay. Yanni's Shroud of Turin. Chrissy Be Proud. No curing. Okay. Here for the content. Aaron uncut Suzuki torch Um

Whoa Susiki torch Whoa Yeah Whoa Yeah Calling your piece of Zizki torch You think that's in there

That's in there Because I've never heard that I've never heard anything close to that Then we got Stephanos Akatildos Whoa that's a Greek That's a diner monkey award Yeah

Grant Ponce Dog who like sniffing Learys call He's just fucking Christ He's bad Nick I apologize Elon's Frisbee

factory. Make no mistake. Jesus. What is happening? I'm sorry, Jesse. Don't read my name, please. Okay? Saudi Arabian roller coaster named 9-11.

We're going to Drexler. No, it's, yeah, I don't know what to do. Yeah, let's Drexler. Yeah, no, it's just, yeah, walked into one. Sosa, then we got Beef Barn, two in the stink, one in the tink. Tudor McAvin. Yanni, you dirty, who are you on Ozempic?

Where are you, dad? List it. Yeah. Listed. He's putting out an SOS through our podcast, which is very funny. Yeah. I'm a Mormon loophole. Let that soak in.

Okay? Soaking. Oh. Oh. Yeah, that's a good one. We should do an episode on that. Okay. The Mormons is really fun how they, the loopholes that they found.

Um, it's fun. Then we got an Indian frisbee scared of showers for two reasons. Lat of 14. I just need to know how they're so, how these guys are so funny. That's got to go on the list, right? It has to. It just, it's too good. I mean, it's walked into one borderline, but it's too good.

It's too good. Yeah. It's too good. It's actually a contender. It's a contender. Yep. Then we got Okskana, Bayjut, the Ukrainian two. Right, that's your favorite.

Yeah, but love her, Holden Edwards. Then we got two-inch puddle of water, Obama's lover drowned in. Okay. Okay. Moosey surprise. Three beers deep and ready to talk about race science. What do you think? I always look at Nick.

What do we do that, Nick? It's funny, no? No? I'm going to Drexler. I'm going to Drexler. It can't go up in lights. All right. But it's funny.

spilled silverware at a Chinese restaurant owl I'm 86 I don't know yeah hobo donkey hyena man D day aka the day I got my tranny tits okay Marisa Rodriguez cum tribute okay a big time chiropractor to Verzi and even heybert what is that just like I guess they got back problem oh kingdom of Tom Leroy for Christ, aka Loud and Turin. Chicken finger, chicken finger. Instead of shroud loud, very good. Mason Chandler. Call me Mikey, the Irish princess, the way I speak Gaelic.

Decent. Good try. Christine, Cisco kid, and then last but not least, then you should have put a ding on it. Okay? Way song she ain't. Racist. Yeah.

Okay, so here we go. So we got a few now. So my wife's new natties, aka amenities of maternity. We're going to, man, it's a good one, but it's just... But, yeah, short list. Yeah. Michelle's big juicy balls. Very funny, blunt chicken finger.

Not a fan of anal, but these hemorrhoids aren't going to push themselves back in. We're going to keep that around. Okay. Durags are frisbees for Leroy's. Definitely got to keep that around. Running a train on Ellen Page, and by that, I mean using her chest scars as train tracks. We're going to walk.

That's a walked into one. So, okay. Yeah, we're going to, yeah, it's a walked into one. It's a walked into one. It's what it is. Absolutely. It's not okay. Uncut Suzuki torch.

We're going to keep that around for a second, just to honor it. It's not going to win. Where are you, Dad? We're going to honor that, but we're going to Drexler. Drexler. Yeah. Indian Frisbee scared of showers for two reasons. We definitely have to keep that one around.

Unfortunately. Yeah. So we do have one, two, three. We have four, five. finalists, and we have not a fan of anal, but the hemorrhoids aren't going to push themselves back in. We have du rags are frisbees for Leroy's, Namin boys. We have uncut Szeiki Torch, and we have Indian frisbee scared of showers for two reasons. I like them all.

I like them all. Do we give this to the fans, or do we make a decision? Well, four of them are a lot. If we're going to give it to the fans, we have to at least get out. One out? Yeah. Not a fan of anal, but these hemorrhoids aren't going to push themselves back in. is very, very funny, but it's from a girl. So it's funnier, I think, if it's from a guy,

even though this woman does have hemorrhoids. Yeah. But it is still funny. Yeah, yeah. Let's Drexler. Okay. Yeah. Okay, but I do think it's great.

Duregs are Frisbees for Leroy's not mean boys. I think it's good, but it's not, doesn't hold up with this list. It rhymes, good, but it is a good point. It is a good point. Yeah, it is a good point. And that's tough for me, actually, because uncut Suzuki Torch. So Sizki Torch and du regs are frisbies for Leros. are both things that we've never thought of that are both good.

We're sitting here making the tough decisions that need to be made by somebody. Yes, what it is. We're sitting around. We're having a council. This is like the council in Nicaea. We got some tough choices to make boys. We deserve to make more monies than public school teachers. 100%.

Yeah. 100% we're making some tough choices here. And then, of course, we have Indian Frisbee scared of showers for two reasons. Now, I know that that one is your favorite. Well, it just seems like when it came out, the thought process behind it, how it kind of caught you in awe, how Jesse laughed, how even Nick laughed. And it just felt like that is very heady and good. And it just feels like the winner to me.

It is the funniest one. Ziziki Torch is, by the way, how I'm going to refer to my piece from now. Yeah, uncut Ziziki Torch is probably in the lexicon. Yeah, that's right. I'd actually like Tony, Sabrina the Hyena, to put that in the glossary. Yeah, you can put that in the glossary right now. That's a new name for the piece is the Suzuki. You can refer to your penis as the uncut to Ziki torch.

Yeah, it's just what it is. And so we're going to chicken finger that. Okay. Okay. Do regs are frisbys for Leroy's Namin boys or Indian Frisbee scared of showers for two reasons. Okay. So we have competing frisbee bits, but there's an obvious winner between those two. So I think the name up in lights is Indian Frisbee scared of showers for two reasons.

You are the winner. Go to history and is it's back.com. You're the PeeW, the pseudof penis of the week. We're here every week. So submit your names. A lot of fun doing this. This is the real work of society, and we're doing it for you. We're bringing you humor.

We're doing it, and I just, you know, it's like I want to ask my wife, do you understand how hard what I do is? Do you realize, honey, why I need to take a minute and just decompress when I get home from work? Because I'm really, I'm bending off the backwards for this family.