History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - John Stamos’ Retired Oikos Cannon

Episode Date: December 18, 2025

Actor, musician and most importantly legendary Hollywood cocksman John Stamos swings by the studio to discuss his epic run in entertainment. The boys have a blast chopping it up with John Stamos. Get comfy, light some candles, and pull the screen close cause this one is hot. Support our sponsors: 🌏 Get exclusive NordVPN deal here ➵ https://NordVPN.com/hyenas It’s risk free with Nord’s 30 day money-back guarantee!✌ Get 15% OFF your entire order with code HYENAS at https://Manscaped.com Get 10% off your first month of BlueChew Gold with code HYENAS. https://bluechew.com Go to https://quince.com/hyenas for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. #comedy #Podcast #History Join our Patreon at 👇 https://www.patreon.com/historyhyenas/ Subscribe to the poddy woddy Our YouTube!: https://bit.ly/2ARdDOz HH Clips:https://bit.ly/2YaK2Z8 iTunes: https://apple.co/2UQTHCc Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3fxtsc0 Hyenas Merch!!! https://store.historyhyenaspod.com Follow us Cuz! 🙆🏻‍♂️ Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ 🙆🏼‍♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🐕More Hyenas Website: www.historyhyenasisback.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/historyhyenas/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/HistoryHyenas Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/historyhyenaspod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Because we had one of the most gorgeous men I've ever seen. in my life on the podcast, Mr. John Stamos. One of the most talented guys, musician, actor, comedic actor, everything. Great guy, my good friend. Yeah. King of the Greeks. Great red sweater. I mean, honestly, I was covered in Oikos after the episode.

It was hard not to have a little pre-com drip out of my piece. It's what it is. I feel like a lemon potato. Come see me, New Year's Eve, Red Bank, New Jersey, Count Basie Theater. We have two shows, Christycomedy.com for Tikiwikis. And then January 10th in West Virginia, Charlestown, West Virginia, Hollywood Casino, Christy Comedy.com for TikiWikis. And we've just added Las Vegas in February at the MGM.

So go check it out and then check out Janus. Yes, come see me in San Francisco, January 2nd and 3rd day after New Year's. Be all hung over. Calgary, Alberta, January 9th and 10th, Detroit, Michigan, January 15th through 17th, then Morris Plain, New Jersey, and then Bakersfield, California. come check us out because afterwards we're taking a little break from the road taking a little break now enjoy this episode with john stammer and also check out patreon.com slash history hyenas What's up, everybody, welcome to another episode of history Aienas. We have the real John Stamos here, John Stamos.

Yes, John Stamos. As many years, I've called you on a special needs Stamos, as I'm sure you've heard. I have. Because I do believe he looks like you as if he had special needs. Because his eyes are closer together? That's right. That's right. His eyes are closely together. He has a below average size head. He doesn't have the hair you have.

He doesn't have the bone structure you have. He looks like you if you had a bit of a chromosomal deficiency. I was like, we want to. Oh, I just say this is the first time I'm meeting you and you're, I don't want to, I don't want a bag on my boy, you honest. No, no, no. Do you have to say that you're a handsome kid. I appreciate that. Thank you.

Your special was very good. And honestly, the whole time I was watching this thing. Why doesn't Janice have this special on Netflix? Why him? Yes. They said no. Yes. I tried to get it on.

They just said no. Yeah. Well, you know. They went no. They said they have a one Greek minimum and they already gave it to Stavros, Stalachis. So they said we can't actually do another Greek unless you want it to start. I'm happy you guys are finally together again.

You know, Janice and I've been friends for a while and he's leaning a little right these days. I've been listening to. Oh, yeah. Well, that's why we're doing the show again. Thank God. Straighten his ass out. As soon as I saw, I was watching him from afar. I said, you know, this guy's getting back to really speaking the truth.

I said, let's start the show again. Yes. Too much. Once I heard his policy on immigration, I said, get him back in the seat. What's the matter with you? Well, I think we all just, maybe I think we all just figured when Hollywood crumbered, we could just all be honest again. Yeah, let's just do it again.

Yeah. Hasn't happened yet. Yes, yeah, almost. Yeah. It's hanging on by a thread. We don't want to talk politics because. Because you can't. Because you can't.

I can't. No, I got into. Well, well, yeah, well. But you're in the holly, you're in the, you know, and you've done very well with it, but you're in the Hollywood machine. You're an A list celebrity. I don't say A. No, I'd say A. People know your first and last name. No, I'd call you A. A by name only.

I tell you why, if I am an A, it's just because I've lasted so long. Right. It lasted longer than others, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. I should have been gone. And you don't look like you've had any work. I haven't. Yeah, which is pretty.

Oh, no, I had a nose job when I was a kid. You did? Really? Two of them. Wow. No Botox? Because you got, you're wringless. Botox on my forehead.

Okay. But I kind of think it's run out by now. Yeah. Yeah. You are a wildly handsome guy and probably the best care I've ever seen actually in person. Yeah. And I would say just a nose job and forehead Botox in Hollywood, that equals no work. No work.

No work. You can actually, it's a net zero. Yeah. I'm 72, 73 next month. Are you 73 next? No. I was going to say that would be, that would make you believe that you Hollywood lead are drinking the blood of children. Now I see why you guys split up.

Yeah. Yeah. No, I'm 62. 62 years old. Even that's impressive. How old are you? I am 41 years old, Fahrenheit. Yeah. 49 plus 150.

Yes. What are we going to do? Are you 49? No. 49. What are we going to do for 50? Well, we're going to have a big party. Well, we're going to have a big party. It depends on when you want to sell it. We're going to have a big party, and we're actually time machine and go back in time because he turned 50 last year. He lies.

He needs a likes to pull up. We always take one year back. My brother took one year back. My brother takes one year back. Well, but that's what Greeks do you said. So Stamos actually 63, but he sang here 16. It depends when he had his last feasting of baby blood. That's what it is. That freezes the aging.

Now here's what happened. Because here's what happened is we had a great guest on last week. Do you know O's Perlman, the medicalist? Yeah, I called you guys, remember? I want to hear how that went. And we want to hear, and you were going to have a lunch with Stavros. Yeah. So we want to hear how that one.

I want to see how much you spent because I want to know how much he ate. I did get stuck with the bills. Did you get hit with 500 plus? Because that's about a little of lunch, he ordered 40,000 advertisers like Alan Ivers. He said he was fasting. Did he say he was fasting? So what does that mean? Just two cheeseburgers?

I said, I haven't eaten. I'm so hungry. And he said, yeah, are you fasting? I said, no, I just haven't eaten for a bit. You know, he goes, I'm doing this intermittent fasting. Sure. And then ordered about 17. Yeah, yeah.

No, he said, fatting is what he said. He said, I'm fatting. By the way. If he's sweetest guy in the world, I really enjoyed me. I don't know, honestly, I got all these calls of my managers. Oh, this guy wants to meet you. He's got a project. I said, great.

I'd love to. And then we just sat and talked and I asked him a bunch of questions and they stuck me with the bill and we went home. No, he's a great guy. And the project, the project will be there was no project would be good.

Yes. There was no projects. There's no project. Oh, really, you just want to hang out. This is what a free lunch, I guess. That's what it is. Well, that's what, yeah, because that's the free lunch. That's what Mom Dhani wants as well.

Yeah, the free lunch. And all the Greeks at some point have to meet each other because it's just not a lot. There's not you, you got you two. You got Stavros. You have, Jack Alfinackus. Maria Minudos, right?

Tanita Faye. Tanita Faye. Tom Hank Hanks. Hacolopoulos. Hacolopoulos. Yeah, Neavar Dahl. Yes. Chad Hanks.

Tell him when I took you to a Greek Easter. Took me to Greek Easter and the priest, it was at Jim Giannopoulos's house. He used to be the big deal. Yeah, big deal. He's a finance guy, right? My dad, he worked for my dad. Yeah, he used to work for my dad. He was like, when my dad started out, he was like a young lawyer who worked for my dad.

and the priest at the party definitely said the Palestinians need to get their shit together right so that part I do remember and I thought that was pretty wild and the prayer that was weird yeah he put it in the prayer yeah but I said hey we're in Hollywood you know but you ended up talking to somebody for a long time when in Jerusalem do as the Jews do

what did you who were you talking to I was talking Randos no no you introduced me to Sarandos yeah he is a Greek yeah Randos yeah I was talking to you no no it was the other it was Dimitri Martin yeah Dimitri Martin yeah Dimitri Martin yeah Dimitri Martin yeah

And your wife was pissed because you weren't home for Easter. That's right. That's right. You got to do what you got to do. How is this show doing? Is it success again? It's this show? We're back.

We're good. We're in the saddle. When you first started back. You're like Desi Arnaz and Lucy. Coming back, baby. I don't know which one's Lucy. Which one's Desiardinez was Latin. Was Latin.

So that would be me. I'm more Latin. Even though he dresses like a Latino. The analogy is terrible. It's the first two people that came to my mind. You guys talk too much in the beginning over each other. Do we? Right. Not now anymore. Now you have a nice rhythm.

Are you listening regularly? What? Are you listening? Yeah. Oh, are you on the Patreon? I'm on yours. Oh, okay, good. Oh, that one's slowed down to one a month. Yeah. And now we're down to 25. You guys have a Patreon too? We do. We do. Patreon.com slash history hyenas where you're probably going to hear most of this episode because I would guarantee that we will get an email from John's publicist that 90% of this episode can't come out. Why? So because Janus is talking about Palestinians and you just can't do that. The priest actually did say that. Did he really? Wow. Yeah, he did. He did. He did. He was going.

give it. He was like, yeah, he did the religiousity. He said, Palestinians, our friends, they've got to get their shit together. I don't know what to tell you. Is this interesting? Should me? Is this a good episode? This is going to be great. I mean, off the, you know, you said we had some nice ones. What happens is we normally

have some nice ones right before the cameras start, and then we just repeat them here to silence, like, you know, obviously you're famous from Full House and then Fuller House, and then I said I'm half German. My show is called Furor House. Got a little giggle, but then on camera, you won't laugh. I get it. I can't laugh at the Furor. I did cabaret here.

I just go sweater shopping together before? Yeah, well, I, you know me. Yeah. He knows me. Yonis knows me better than anyone. I know when there's a handsome man who's coming in as a guest, I need, yeah, look at this. Are you lactating? What are you have, like, nice to meet you.

Yeah. And his shirt's dirty. This is just sweat. Well, that's just sweat. You got a dirty shirt. No, that's just sweat. Yeah. I miss you.

You know, we really bonded the two of us and we would FaceTime each other. He'd always been in a hotel somewhere like half naked. Like, sure. What he is. It's our life. Yeah. And you would have this nice long. And you too with the beach boys.

you're always on tour, but you can't live the way you used to live. I just talked about you being half naked, and you said, you too. Yeah, because you, I've seen you naked. I've heard you piss. We've had, been talking while you're prostate. His prostate is strong, exceptionally strong. Really? Yeah. He, um, but we would have these great conversations. This is, long, smart conversation. I've learned a lot from you. Yeah. From me? Yes. Yeah. You're wildly intelligent. So are you leaning a little more right now? Nope. Not at all. Now, this may be a question, obviously, and forgive me if this has been asked to you time and time again, but I'm I'm sorry if it has been.

Nudge me when he gets to this point. Okay. Do you, when you come, is it Chobani yogurt? Oikos. Is it Oikos? Yeah. I thought it was Chobani? No.

You've always been Oikos. Yes. Sorry about that. So yes. Was it Oikos? Did Oikos? I thought you were Chobani. No, it was Oikos.

Forget that. Yeah. So it's Oikos. Yeah. Stuff. Yeah. So. O's, was he, did he trip you guys out?

Did he do something there? He did. He did. And what he did was is he did. is he did a thing that he was able to guess our birthdays with cards. Well, by Googling it, but he was able to get these card tricks out. But he had his birthday as 1976, which is what his birthday is on the internet. But the real birthday is 1975.

So he obviously did something on the internet. So that's what we think, because if he would have known his actual birthday, then it's really a mentalist thing. And he is amazing. No, but the biggest trick he was able to do was somehow get 20% of this whole podcast and commission all our roadwork. Well, that wasn't him being a mentalist. That's what I mean.

That was amazing part about it. Yes. That's what we've named the episode, The Magic Frisbee. Yeah, I went to my, you know, he invoiced me. Yes. Yeah, I need, for your. I mean, he's taken 15% off of my Austin Gates. Yeah.

So I don't know how he did that. But they always found a way. Now, what are you doing, John? He's doing big TV shows. John's with the Beach Boys, but we know, and again, John's in a different place. They're not the Beach Boys anymore. They're the Beach Boys anymore. They're the Beach Elderly.

Right. They're the beach men. They need to rename their name. To the beach old boys. Right. And that's... Yeah. Do's Beach. Does... Because the Hollywood... I saw the McCart of Yul...

They got many sitting ovations. That's what it is. The crowd was definitely a little older. Yeah, their code for their pre-sale is AARP. I played a doctor, so if somebody has some sort of... That's a good thing that you're on there. That's bullshit. By the way, the Beach Boys have never been harder.

I'll tell you why. Because people need... Decency isn't at all time high and at low and discord at all time high. Because of our president. He's a fucking... I'm not going to say anything.

But I'm saying that people need this music right now. So bad. It's optimism. Positiveity. Wouldn't be nice. Fun, fun, fun. And we've been playing a lot of festivals lately where it's like a young...

We were at, we played Riot Fest. 60,000 people that were, you know, under 90. One of the coolest things John did is me and my wife were just sitting on the couch and he FaceTime me from stage. and he just put it there and he was like what's up while they were playing oh my god so i was able we were able to just enjoy the concert but that show was that radio where was it at uh no you were outside no you were outside no we went to that oh that wasn't it was weird that's not a place for

to you now getting a face time like that from a greek family from john stamos is that that is equivalent of jesus who else could in the greek community who's a bigger call from stamos no stamos no stamos is big especially for the ladies yeah i think they're called or On Easter, he gave my cousin who passed away a beautiful, he is a great human being. Horace, look at him. He's also a normal guy. People go, oh, these Hollywood people, they're, you know, just a normal good guy. Just a normal guy.

And he did a good thing. My cousin had cancer, and he did a little video for her. You told me, yeah, yeah, it's a beautiful thing. It's a really beautiful thing. Yeah. Why am I even here? Well, I would assume the way you're dressed, you're promoting some type of hallmark lifetime. Motherfucker.

That's good. That's good. is the outfit that you would see at all. Yeah, that, yeah. You look like a guy who's lost in Christmas and I was just on, um, Kelly and I, uh, and I had to run out and get a sweater because is it got a good. Is Hollywood weird now that you're doing the tonight show tonight? You just came from Kelly and then you stopped off to talk to two fucking assholes like us. Yeah. And this is crazy that you fit this one. Yeah. You know what? I used to call him for help on my panel. We, I got it. Should we work on some my jokes for tonight? Yeah. Let's see what

you got. You're going with Jimmy Fallon. Yeah. Okay. Well, I don't air tonight. This will air out. Do you want us to work in it, or should we call a couple five-year-olds to do it in crayons? Okay. That was a Fallon hit? I don't get it. It's calling Jimmy. But we get a couple eggs and just smash him on his face. He does, just saying that Jimmy doesn't, Jimmy does more like, you know, like, you know, like, uh, pranks and stuff.

Just kind of like, you know, you know, does games. Yeah, he does games, yeah. Now, what, what are you going to be? Do you guys know, have you ever been on a talk, like, I'm not being a shit here, but I have you guys. I was actually the first comic to do stand-up on the Tonight Show, and it didn't air, but it was a test show. So that's why another nickname for Janus is in a need in addition to his specially famous. We call him Yanni almost because he almost gets everything almost and then it's just almost and then

right every T-show and TV shows. So he was the first guy in the tonight show and it almost got in the air but it did not. I've talked to so many comics about him and wondering in a serious note because I think he's one of the greatest. Sure. And I ask so many people like why is he not a superstar yet? And they said give it, there's no age, there's no time limit for a comedian to hit. big. I would say, I would say that. I would say that. I would say one

answer I'd have is why he's not bigger than he should because of course the talent isn't saying this. Probably because his most viral video is him in a wig dressed as a trans-Latina woman yelling the N-word. That would be one thing. You think that hurt? If you guys want to Google Morisa Das-It, I would just think that the powers that be are saying, you know, this guy's great. Let's have a tonight show. Oh, wait, here's him dressed as a trans woman from 2010 yelling, that's it, and saying the N-word. And I think, think that they say, you know what, let's move on to the next guy. Yeah.

Ah, here, you know what? Chris, maybe a better choice. Yeah. I thought it was the blackface you did. Yes, but it wasn't. But, I mean, it worked out for Jimmy. Jimmy did blackface. Jimmy is the greatest.

That guy has the energy of, you know. Kimmel, we're talking about. Yeah. Yeah. No. You're talking about Phel as well. Kimmel. Kimmel did blackface.

Kimmel, no, he did. Kimmel did. Kimmel did. Yeah, he did. What he just did, what he just did, what he just did, what he's getting through this, this, you know, issue that he did is remarkable. It's the beginning of us sort of fighting for Oh, Kimmel? And they just re-signed

him again at ABC. So it's good. Did you beat him with me ever? Never met him. Great. Chris knows him well, though. He guest hosted the show. You know what? I saw that. I swear to God, I saw it and I go, why the fuck did they not ask me to guest host? They never have. Yeah. Jimmy? Yeah, what is up with that? I saw that. I wondered

why. I just You were good. I'm kidding. I don't. Yeah. Jimmy and I Yeah, do you think there's anti-Greek kind of discrimination in Hollywood? Well, I think, I don't know. Kimmel has asked me, you know, obviously getting the podcast back with Yannis, he asked me if I do the podcast with a mask on, because being around a Greek. So there might be, might be something that he just feels that way, I don't know.

Yeah. When you do these talk shows for you folks out there, you have to like do pre-interviews and you literally have to figure out like almost everything you're saying, like what they're going to ask you, what the joke is, what the thing is. Sure, it's a little, and that's why for us, comics, that's harder for us because we'd like to be in a free flow like we are now and just because any time you tell me to perform my joke and it's not in a stand-up setting, it's very, very, very difficult. It's hard to do those shows because you have five, six minutes. You've got to be

funny. You've got to promote what you're doing. I'm on this new show called Palm Royale with Kristen Wig. And you have to be charming and likable and all that stuff. And you've got six, seven minutes. She's one of the funniest. She literally is one of them. Kristen Wick? She was people. So tell us about this show. I play a lawyer slash gynecologist and that was, I said, sign me up. Nice. You could sue yourself. Yeah, I could go to it.

And it was great. It's great. You've done, you've done for gynecology. Yeah, I've seen a couple. You've seen a couple. That part was easy. The lawyer part was tough. Yeah, yeah.

You know, it was a great character. You should watch, you guys, your wife probably like it. You're married too, right? I am married, yeah. Do you have kids? I do. I have three kids. I'm sitting between two guys who've gotten a lot of pussy.

Yeah. I just risk what it is. I just had that moment I realized, I mean, I've had some in my life, but I'm sitting between two fucking Hall of Fame pros who've gotten a lot of pussy. You're sitting between two guys who you can bet almost near 100% have at least one strand of HPV. I thought you were going to say Escobo brothers. Oh, about that too, yeah. I've known Chris for 15 years and two bouts of syphilis.

I've went old school. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, I've gotten diseases Benjamin Franklin's gotten. That's the level I'm playing at. But now we're good. We're great. We have a beautiful family at home. Good, good.

And now, if anything, you know, we're faithful. We love it. And, you know, outside of random sex with men, there's no, I'm just keeping it in my pants. You're allowed to do that. I just had that top up through my head. These guys got a lot of pussy. They really did. Yeah, yeah.

And then we're sitting in a room with Nick, who's in his mid-forties has gotten next to no pussy. He's wearing a... Go listen. No, no, he gets a lot of put. Girls love an NW. wrestling shirt. That's what you're really going to do. Yeah, they love it.

And orange sneakers. They're soaking. I'm sure you did well, Janice, before. Your wife is stunning. Crush it. No, here's the best. Your wife is too good looking for you. No, no.

I said the same thing. He out kicked his comfort. Yeah. You want to hear a true story. You won't even remember this because this is just your life and that's part of the joke, but this is a true story. When I went with him to this sort of after hours place, he had a couple friends. There was a bunch of us hanging out.

But anyway, this girl comes over, this woman. She must have been like, you probably don't even remember this. I was telling it on stage for a little while. You must have been in her 50s, yeah. I probably will again, or maybe I'll just do it here. And I swear to God, she comes up to him, she's shaking or whatever. And she's like, oh, my God, oh, my God. She's like, I have this story to tell you.

She was like, like, is she shaking nervous? She has Parkinson's. Yeah, no, she was shaking nervous, like, fucking, you know. Like, oh, my God, it's John Stainbles. Yes. We're a bathtub gin. Right. Which is a great place, by the way.

This already sounds like one of my aunts. Yeah. So, and then she goes, you don't know, you don't know this, but like 20 years ago, 25 years ago. She was in her 50s, so I guess when she was young, she's like, I went to a Beach Boys concert or whatever, and she was like, you don't understand how big a fan I am. Like, I had you up in my wall, full hot, like, and then she goes, you threw out a Coke can. You threw out a can. Of Coca-Cola. Yeah, like, a cat. And she goes, and she goes, I went in the garbage and got the can. And I still have the can. Oh, my God. And my favorite part about it. And then she was like, can I just get your autograph or whatever? He was like, you know, because he was just doing the pleasure. Because imagine your life is hearing stories like this all. If a woman told me this, my ego would be through the roof, or I would call the police and say, I have a stalk or someone's going through my garbage. But he was so used to it. He was like, yeah, what do you want me to sign?

All right, yeah. It was just like another Tuesday for him. You want me to sign your tit. What do you want me to put it? What's name is Lorraine Bobbitt. She told us for cutting off her husband's penis. This was a girl who just told him that she kept his garbage for 20 years. And he was just like, yeah, it's kind of what you guys do.

You keep my garbage. Yeah. You don't remember that, do you? No, I know. How funny is that the, well, it's probably happens to him all the time. Yeah. That's odd. That is rude. And he probably can't acknowledge it because Coca-Cola is not a sponsor.

He's with Pepsi. So can you change the can to Pepsi, and then he can't acknowledge it. Yes, he remembers. Oikos. I do love Oikos. I love any type of Greek yogurt. Zero-saturated fat, 19 grams of protein. It's good for your heart. It's good for your collection. Do your wife's watch hunting wives? My wife does, yes. I'm going to be on next season. That's why she texted me and said, she's looking forward to seeing you on that. Is that what she said? Oh. Yeah. And, you know, it's kind of erotic the show. I mean, it's,

You know, it was telling me, and I went to tell my wife, I said, well, they called and they said, you know, we're thinking about, we, there's a scene, oral sex scene in there, you know, I said, giving or receiving. I said, receiving. Beautiful. Girl. Okay, I'm in. Yeah, 100%. So now I got to approach my wife. I was like, love, I know you've seen the show. They're thinking about asking me. Are you going to show your penis? Like, no, why, why? You should show your penis. Pull it out. I'm not going to show my, now? Why not? how good time everyone should read stamos's book you want to know why tell me because stamos used to party big yeah he's a party and he's open about it i like that it's to party a big yeah yeah especially no cameras back then 80 yeah there's no cameras having the type of fame you had in the 90s right that's when it was 80s 90s i mean like what i can't imagine what life must have been like for you or anybody like you at that time i mean full house was the biggest show in the world and he's one of the stars.

I'd give you the book so you could read it, but all the pages are stuck together. Oikos! I got my oikos on page 18. That's how old she was. Babe, here's the thing is, I know you just came from Texas. Every time I go to Texas in these deep south states,

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That's what it is because a lot of times that's the only thing that calms me down after the flight before the show is I got it. Sometimes I start jerking off at the reception desk. Yeah, yeah. I just start yelling I'm a Marriott Bonvoy Rewards member. Yeah, some guys smoke a cigar to one in the line. Some guys got an empty to glue gun.

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I mean, that is just, do you shave your pubs? What do you do? I shave my pubs. You want to see? Yeah. Yeah. Let me see. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, okay. Kids shaved. Yeah, see. Yeah. That is brought to you by Manscape. By Manscaped right there, because this has got the crop preserver. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, just put a little bit out on your balls, cuz. You got to clean up your fucking jewelry. Yeah, you got the crop soother, the ball aftershave lotion, and then you got this guy on the front who looks like he mirrors your phone to make you believe that he's reading the name out of your phone and doing car trick's meeting birthdays. Yeah, Manscape is great. Look, everyone should be cleaning up their piece. Yeah, because the fumes are in the hair.

Yes. So you keep my guy. And as a Greek, you know that. Yes, so I always keep my guy trimmed down. I trim my balls. They give you a nice little bag. Everyone needs to get Manscape. Because these are high quality.

They really, you know, the company does so well. This is a high quality trimmer right here. It's what it is. And then you throw this one in the nose. Yeah. And boom, you get the whole stuff. Now, Nick, I want to just make it clear that the Christmas gift we got you was not this Manscape, but we got another one.

Yeah, we got something different for you. Yeah, it's something different. So it's not this box. Don't worry that it looks like that. That's all part of their, you know, packaging. Yeah. So we're talking about the Manscape Performance Package 5.0 Ultra. It's the ultimate upgrade because nothing says,

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I like to put it on my nose, my eyebrow, and then I like to put it on my piece because sometimes while I'm whacking my weeds, I'm fucking whacking my cock. Give the gift of smooth this holiday with the performance package 5.0. Ultra. Get 15% off your entire order with the code hyenas at manscape.com. That's a 15% off discount with code hyenas at manscape com. Stay on top of your grooming game and be ready for anything the season throws your way. Make sure

there's no fumare. That's it. I need some jokes, guys, for tonight. Yeah, what do you think of the same? Or is this interesting? No, yeah, of course. No, no, no. So what do you... I got a... are the questions they've asked. Well, they want Christmas. They want Christmas, right? Sure. I have a, this is a true story to my mother-in-law makes this, this dessert.

And it's like, like, Pirates booty and sugar and caramel and cream and stuff. And it's so good you become addicted to it. We call it crack. It's my mother-in-law's crack. And you can't stop eating my mother-in-law's crack. And people come over, before they even say, Merry Christmas, it's like, is your mother-in-law's crack out? And, you know, it's a mother-in-law's crack run. Oh, I get it.

The mother-in-law's crack out. Right, right. The other than you, she didn't make it, everybody. It's like Christmas heroin. Right. So you can't stop eating the crack. Right, right. Can't stop eating the crack, yes.

Looking the crack. Yeah. Butt crack. There's a pirate joke in there. You can make a smiley and play. The FedEx, I said, respect. Your mother-in-law's crack changed my life. I said, how did he get it, you know?

Right. I like it. I like that. And Jimmy's going to laugh at that. He'll be subtly drunk by then. No. Sure. Jimmy likes to boost it.

it's just a known it's great you can't see i know you don't acknowledge that you know i don't know i don't know i've i've had to them like that i that's the thing with me is i like an honest per at this point in my life i'm done with the i'm done with the bullshit yeah like my like my wife got upset the other day that one of our uh daughters teachers she posts on facebook that she goes out and drinks on friday i said what else do this girl's 25 years old you want her to be drinking yeah and doing stuff like that i don't want any of these weirdos that are going home and knitting and you know to a protest i want her out there drinking yeah you know having sex in a car in the parking lot off the sawmill. That's a 25-year-old girl.

Nate told me this story, what he, you know. Nate Bargotsie. Him and Jimmy are obviously really close now. Yeah. But this is-Cimal, Fallon? No, Fallon. Nate Bargawton and Jimmy Fallon. Okay.

So, uh, Val Garcia's what works with him a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So when they, they, they, way back in the day, told me this story they were drinking. And yeah, Jimmy, Jimmy can throw him back. Throw him back, but it's, we all see him at the comedy clubs. A lot of, a lot of guys like to drink. It's legal.

And Nate used to drink a lot. I've never seen him drunk on his show. No, no, no, not a show. Not a show. No, but Nate, yeah, Nate likes to drink a lot. And I'm a big, I'm a big advocate for getting drunk Nate back. Is it funny? Nate is what we used to come.

Drunk Nate from the, the Nate that only Janice and I and the other comics in New York have seen is the real Nate. That's the fun Nate. That's the Nate that I hope one day pops out at the right time. Yeah, but I mean, that's the point is like that was, but he told me this story where he got really drunk with Fallon. and he got so drunk that he became a little like red state Nate we used to call him and so he said something to Fallon

like that was a little you know a little like Jimmy didn't know what to do Jimmy didn't know how to turn that into a game and he goes like he goes what do you mean me bad yeah yeah you what do you mean we can't let them in

what does that mean Nate was out sorry now do we think Nate's doing a little too much the music is an amusement park I mean, well, that's the thing, yeah. No, I mean, I think I said go for it. I don't know. Yes, I say go for it.

He always wanted to be the biggest comic on the planet. That was always his goal. I've known him to start. But Dollywood, it's a lot. Yeah. It's a lot. And he wants to be Walt Disney, which I respect the guy's, you know, vision on it. Well, he already hates Jews, so he's already.

That's what it is. Yes. Yes. He wants to name the theme park, the Wolf Slayer, which I think's a little much. That's too much. So, I mean, it's a perfect guy to fill his shoes. Yeah, you guys, you comics have been brutal with each other these days. But this is what we've always been, though.

Yeah, no, but it's not a little crazy. It's too much, yeah. I think it's because, like, everyone sees versions of people on the Internet that are very one-dimensional and they're just, like, starting to attack each other. I also think that's all that's left to do on the Internet is just attack. And I think that what happened is, too, with the Internet and just with comedy becoming as big as it's become, some comedians now are not, they're using their platform to not do comedy. And then that for us is like, well, now you're going to get made fun for that.

You have to be funny every time you come on. the camera that's our job i'm never going to go ever say anything serious even if you force me to i'll just make a joke because that's what i'm presented myself right right so the minute you start to get too serious for comics we're like now you're going to get abused and also that's how we show love i mean we've been making fun of each other in the backs bowels of comedy club you guys do it with love years yes with love yeah you know rickles was like my father the best yeah he was very close with rickles and he yeah and he uh i don't say he was your father yeah i know i got the joke i mean you're here to be funny it was an honest question you're not he was an honest question you're

question yeah i said yeah okay thank my testicles look like i appreciate it um yeah you're supposed anything i say is funny man is it crickets uh are you dressed like a christmas ornament yeah i know that was good i had to i was on the i do love it i'm yes um but where were we rickles comedy guys rickles was i'm i'm a i'm a huge i don't know if you know chris but like i'm i'm a stand-up uh groupie i love stand-up comedy i'm fascinated by you guys who's your favorite outside of yanni I loved, you know, Shandling was great. Because of Bob Dave, I got to spend time with, I got to meet a lot of comics over the years.

Well, that's what, you know, about Bob Sagitt, who we all loved. Did you know Bob? I did know, I didn't know him that well, but I got to see him. I'm thankful I got to see him perform live with Jeff Ross and Gilbert Godfrey. Oh, my Godfrey also passed away. He did he? They had a great show. Jeff Ross and David Tell had a great show on Netflix called Bumping Mike.

Yes. And I was at the recording that those guys were at, Bob Saggett and Gilbert Godfrey. so I got to watch him live and then, you know, sadly he passed away shortly thereafter. But what was all, what's awesome about him, what comics knew was how dirty his comedy was. Right. But that was, you know, nope, like my mother, love Full House, didn't know that. But when I got into comedy was like, oh, the old Bob Sagitt was awesome, all these cursing. But you knew that, like, on the set of Full House, Bob was Bob.

But the public didn't know that. That's fascinating to me. He was, and, you know, the bummer is, like you said, like, he had such respect from comics. He didn't know. That's the saddest part about his death to me was that he didn't know how. loved he was. You know, when he died, it was like Princess Diana died or something. Sure. I mean, the outpouring was insane.

Well, you wrote that beautiful article about him that actually I was reading when I was in San Diego. I actually teared up. I couldn't believe you read, you wrote it yourself. Did you caveat to that? He was tearing up because if it's ticket sales. I mean, no. He was killing. Oh, oh, him

ticket sales. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That part, that too, yeah. Yeah. That's like they were still strong. It's what it is. Everybody had a little bit of that stimulus money. you guys are a lot of like you do the same face stuff you call it to the kid love it's weird mentally retarded no I remember when

our friend noticed it first he goes he goes neither one of you guys talk like that but when you get together you both talk I know my my Jasmine my wife and I'm sure your wife has very she gets very annoyed when I'm on the phone with him because she's like why do you start talking like that it really pisses me off I'm like it's my thing shut up stage voice yeah well we just

like we're like two kids in the back of the class yeah having fun just you should Bob, but to go back to Bob Sagitt, he was so respected. And when he came into the comedy club, it was like you're seeing like a comedy legend where you're like, because, you know, we see a lot to comedy sell. Every with Louis C.K. and Colin Quinn and Chappelle, all these guys come in. But Bob Sagitt's like that.

It's like it was a be like Jim Norton told me once. It was like seeing Robin Williams when he was alive. Like he would come in randomly, rarely. And then it's like, wow, that's him. Same with Bob Sagitt. Well, sometimes you would hide it just so he can write down your jokes. That's what they said. Chappelle loved it, Bob, you know.

He spoke at his funeral. He said that, like, when Chappelle was coming up, that Bob, like, helped him out, and, you know, it was a good... Yeah. So did Bob Saggett get that role on Full House just being, like, a stand-up, like a dirty, filthy stand-up comic, who he was, that was what he presented his comedy as, and they were like, he might be perfect to be the TV-clean dad?

No. Is that how it happened? No. You know, Jeff Franklin, who created the show, always wanted Bob. Bob was doing, like, some morning show here in New York, and he wasn't available, and so, no, he was... But Jeff knew him as a comic. Bob used to do warm-up in the, like, live sitcom audiences and stuff.

So when Jeff was working on LaRourne and Shirley and I think bosom buddies and stuff, Bob was the stand-up with the guy in the audience. See, that, you know, what you say like about, you know, the music being wholesome with the Beach Boys and all that, I want to start doing it. Like, I have a sitcom in development right now. You know, I want to be like, oh, put it like a wholesome show out there. I just know, even if it gets on, people don't watch that kind of TV anymore, and I wish they would. like that path for stand-ups to get on a sitcom and do that was like the path that's just you again it's still available but it doesn't you just nobody watches yeah but they maybe they would because you're like what are your kids what did they watch like mr beast yeah yeah they're online

yeah yeah youtube and all that and i try to i try to watch but i will say but do they watch full house they watch fuller house yeah my kids watch fuller house so they didn't understand my kids like you know we were when remember episode one of fuller house my daughter who's 10 now my my stepson's 15, when my wife and I started singing the theme song to Full House, they were looking at us, like, how do you know that? Have you seen the show? We're like, what do you talk? They didn't understand that Full House was a show to begin with, you know, and when we were kids.

But what I noticed about them is, yes, they enjoy the Mr. Beast of the World and the TikTok stuff. But when we sit down and make them watch like a family movie from our time, they love it. Yeah, they love it. I've fought the show forever. Like, you know, I was like, well, fuck that show. I don't want to be part of that. Yeah, you almost walk. on the pilot, right?

Or you don't want to do the pilot. Yeah, the kids were getting all the laughs. I'm like, what am I fucking do? This is in Roper Room, you know, I want to out. Yeah. And I've, you know, it took me years of, and I've, you know, I've done everything since. I've been so, you know, lucky to have done a fried Broadway show. I was, I was, the last thing I did was with James Earl Jones, and it was a powerful

dramatic play by Gore Vidal. Are we boring? No, no, this is great. James Aldeons, Mustafa. Yeah, right. Yeah. One of the most, you know, well-respected, greatest actors of our show. And the last day.

It was a really powerful show, and people, you know, it was very serious, very political drama by Gorby Dahl. And I remember telling him on our way out, I said, I called him Big Daddy. It's a Big Daddy. He called me Little John. It's a Big Daddy. You did something that no one's done for me. Yeah, I don't know why. Go ahead. On paper, John, I got to be honest with you, on paper, you're as bad as gay as they come. Broadway shows, call men.

Yeah, my wife thought I was gay when I first met me. Yes. Well, we're all a little gay. We all are a little. I mean, we perform. Yes, I'm saying that as a fellow guy who also on paper. I'm on paper and in reality game. Because I always thought it was funny that the black community, that's their big thing.

They go, oh, they're going to turn you gay. You know, there's a paranoia with all the comics. Like, oh, you got to do gay stuff. It's like, dude, we're all already a little gay. Gay adjacent. Just the simple fact that we're out here doing a performing art. Yeah, why is that gay? Because of the guys from the neighborhood, you think the guys working out local three electricians are like,

hey, look, these fucking guys. Yeah. They think we're gay. Come see our skit. Come see me perform. Yeah, you don't think that they're taking freeze frames of us right now and making the mic into a huge penis and then white cream come out and then they'll write oikos

on the way up to your lips. And I said to him, you change people's perception of me. People see me in a new way and I appreciate that. Big Daddy. Stage door opens up and everybody's Uncle Jesse, Uncle Jesse, say have mercy, Sammer. And I couldn't even look at him. And then I finally kind of glanced over at him and someone had their phone out and said,

James, could you do Luke I am your father for my kid on the phone? You realize. And we just looked at each other and laughed. but you know what so everybody everybody has everybody gets it and yes you were uncle jesse to me but you've done a great job of now you're john stamos you've done so many other things jason alexander being george i think now is starting to become like jason alexander for a while we would see him as he's george yeah from framers crammer so it's not and now you got a lot of fame and fortune out of it that's great but i think as an actor sometimes you want to be you first yeah but that's happened so

i'm not bitter about it and then what when i hear uh when i see billy watching the show this full house is like i get it now like i get the show is about love yeah and it's like i want him to watch shows yeah yeah he's i'm telling you these shows like if you do them right they are like joe rogan has told us before like he watches big bang theory with his wife and kids and he actually laughs out loud because if it's done right you can do it it's just i think so many of them have been done wrong yeah i'm going to change that i'm going to do it right yeah what's your sitcom about it's about uh my family i'm not available by the way it's no actually would there be a role would you would you would be interested playing a Latino or do you have to play Greek? You can't do that anymore.

Can't do that anymore. Can't do that. Right. Yeah. Right. Can't do that. Mexican, I can play. Max, yeah. Can't do that. Yes. You can't do that. Yeah. But what is it? Is it? What is it? We have the set. The premise is, yeah, it's about my family. You know, I got a wife, three kids, one of my oldest ones in my stepson. Uh, you know, my father lives downstairs. He's like a kind of in and out of jail guy, divorced from my mom. Like, you know, the, and he's got to hide them from mice. Exactly. Okay. Um, it's, it's, watch that. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yes. So it's like, you know, it's basically the updated my version. Everybody Loves Raymond was my show from my neighborhood. I love Ray Romano. It's like my version of that. So it's like your family sitcom and Jimmy Kimmel's producing. And Jimmy's in agreement with me as like, you know what, Chris, even if we think this may not get the views creatively, if this is the show you want to do, let's do it. Let's try it. He wants to do it with a live audience. He wants to do it because he's a Norman Lear guy, Jimmy. So he's like, I want to do it like that. If you do it with love and good writing and good values and good things.

That's what I'm looking for. It needs to be honest. I watch some of these other shows that Billy's watching and it's like the shit. Yes. The parents are assholes. The kids are like shitty. All the fart jokes, poop jokes. They're shitty to the parents.

The parents are dummies. What's he watching Billy now? He watches. Your son. Billy's your son. Okay, I wasn't sure. K-pop demon hunters. Sure.

Oh, my kids love that. A lot. I've seen it a thousand times. K-pop demon hunters. He does like Beast. I like Mark Rober better for him to watch. Mr. Bees called me one day and I put him on the phone with Billy and that was pretty cool. It's great.

Very cool. Yeah. But Jimmy, you should, I mean, he knows how to do those shows. There's a void that needs to be happy. What do you think of this as my parents? You ready for this? Steve Sharipa and my dad, ready for my mom? Cindy Lauper.

What do you think? Love it. Yeah, great. You like that? Yeah. You like that? Like that? And then what else?

And I was thinking as my stepson, Nick Fuentes, just to get the views in. Like that. I like that. So hot right now. Scott Lanker is working on? Scott Lanker from killing. Scotty, Scottie, see, he does know you. I know him.

John, Scott's a great guy. You should do that. That'd be good. Yeah, I'm going to take... What was he going to be? The gay uncle? No, we're going to get him in. Well, he's going to play his Marisa character, and that's going to be my wife.

Yeah. Oh, good. Yes. Yeah, there we go. We're going to have... You should do it on HBO so you can have sex. Sex. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, we want to try to do like an AB... Obviously, you know, Jimmy, ABC. So it's like, but we want to try to do something different. You know, we'll see. I mean, see, I'm also very well aware. Everybody thinks when there's, oh, I'm going to do some different. I am aware that the odds are stacked against you.

But I just want to, what I've learned about failing so much is I'll do what I want to do. Different is what you want to do. Yeah. Because nobody's doing that. Yeah. You know what happened? You know, the truth is like, full house was whatever. But all the stars lined up and chemistry happened.

Like, that's the thing. If you get, have chemistry with someone. And you can't cast it. You can't pay for it. It just has to happen. It has to happen. Then, you know, but Jimmy knows how to do it. He knows how to do it, yeah.

Is that what it is? It's just, sometimes it's just like, yeah, yeah. I've been on a million shows. You've got to put it in God. I've had my own two or three of my own shows and work. And it doesn't matter. Just putting star power together. You put the fourth most famous people, that doesn't work.

It doesn't matter. I always go back to, even on podcasting, there was a time. People don't even, I think this is how it just didn't do well. I think it was Obama and Bruce Springsteen had a podcast that nobody watched. Right, no kids. Did they? Yeah, because it just didn't have. It didn't work.

on Zoom, no chemistry, and these are arguably two of the most famous people in the world, and nobody watched it. I want this to keep going, but I have to pee. No, go ahead. Here. Can I? Thanks. I'll have to move to take. Pee into that, yes. Take that wall out. That's what it is. Can I? Yeah. Boy, what are you guys going to talk about while I'm gone.

We'll do a quick ad. We're going to talk. No, let them go and then we'll talk about his sweater. Yeah, we'll talk about you and then you come back. Yeah, and then. Where is it? And Nick will take you and hold your dick while you do it. Yes, exactly. You have an option. We have a urnily could piss right in Nick's Because take a walk with John Stamos. I mean, this kid's on EBD benefits. Yes.

He's on SNAP. So, you think, yeah. Because he's got a wild life. If he's escorting Stamble's in a bathroom. Look at it. He's got no ass. Yeah, I mean. Yeah. But that's what, oh, yeah, pull it out.

Turn the cameras on. Oh, God, yeah. I hope John pisses on Nick's hat and the Nick puts his hat and lemon potato start growing out of his scalp. I mean, a wild guy, right? I mean, this is, he, the nerves of his. him because we're asking the shit that he knows he can't say or acknowledge. But he is past the point, John, of what could ever take John that?

I'm saying Nick Fuentes is not going to, you know? He's totally cool with it. Yes. I did, I did whiskey ginger with him, and Santino made him sit in the producer's chair. Yeah. And he's John Stamos. So he's a down-earth guy. Yeah, because I've noticed him.

He keeps going like this, whatever. And he can't do drugs anymore. Yeah, it's just what it is. So he's just a little fidgety. It's what we call being on the spectrum. Yeah. it's what it is he's a good guy but he's got yeah he's got a great show coming out with Kristen Whig yeah Kristen Wick who's a piece I think Kristen Wig's beautiful she's a piece and

she's and I and I just you know we'll say it here on camera so he doesn't hear it but that story's gonna bomb big on Fallon which what the story's gonna tell about his mom's ass crack yeah and we'll just let it sit and no no I get laughs it'll get laugh it'll get laugh it's because he's good at he's good at he's so likable but what doesn't Jimmy laugh at That's the thing. Jimmy's going to laugh because I know John can't acknowledge it and I respect John for being a profession, but Jimmy will be actively fucking stone cold drunk on that show.

He's a drunk when he broke his hand, they said. He fucking just fell down to flight of stairs because he was hammered. We know him. He's a comic. He drinks a lot. He drinks a lot and he might actually one day pass out on the set and that's when I'll begin to watch the show. I think what he's doing the show, he's just not even there.

I think he just goes on autopilot. Yeah, well, he's fully, I mean, he's got a flask of whiskey underneath his desk. So John But again, John's from the old school Which I respect And I like what he said about being wholesome Because I think we've got to start doing a little bit

More of that You know, we gotta start Why don't we have one episode a month that's wholesome? You want to do a wholesome show? I want to do a wholesome episode But I want this one We'll call it For Lynn But I want to do

I want to do I want to call it wholesome And I want to spell it H-O-E-Sum And then the whole, we'll do the whole episode It butt plugs it Yeah Because this is my favorite ad Thank you to Blue Chew for sponsoring the episode and sponsoring my rock hard cock.

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Quince.com slash hyenas. But you know what the difference is... Back in the day, guys would do wholesome stuff. Right. But then they would be personally... Right. They would be dirtbags. Right.

And nobody knew about it. Now everything is just recorded forever. I mean, Johnny Carson used to get so drunk. I remember who was the guy who used to own Dangerfields, who was Rodney Dangerfield? Who was Rodney's partner, the guy who kept it, the old guy, whatever. You ever do Dangerfields? Yeah, of course. Oh, the, the, whatever his name is, his partner.

The waiter? No, no, not the waiter, the old Greek waiter. Anyway, the owner told me Carson used to come in hammered. The Dangerfields. The Dangerfields. Hammered because he lived close by. He would get so hammered, he would curse people out. One time he grabbed this guy's wife's tits, the guy wanted to fight him, they had to break it up,

And then he would walk home. And they'd be like, you can't walk home, you're Johnny Carson. Like, back then he was like one of the most famous people in the planet. But he would insist on walking home drunk. So his driver's security would like drive the car next day while he was like cursing him out driving home. Dude, did you ever hear that? That was just what it was. Do you ever hear that Johnny Carson story about how he accidentally offended like a mob guy's wife?

And the mob guy wanted to kill car. He had a hit out on Carson. Carson had to go to Frank Sinatra. And Sinatra had to say Frank Sinatra basically. get to say squash it all. Is that a real story? Did you ever hear a story like this? I haven't heard of that. Yeah. You know the story he does know. He did this podcast series with the guy who kidnapped Frank Sinatra's son, which is very interesting. Why did he do that? Why did he kidnap his son? You never heard about this story? No. It's a great story. Do you want to tell?

No, you? Well, because he was a nutter and he wanted to make money and he thought, I'm going to kidnap somebody famous and God told him to actually he was in his car and he's right over the radio God said kidnap somebody and he's and the radio was off and uh he he he was going to do bob hope's son but he thought oh that's too patriotic and so he went for synachers it's a crazy story how long did he have him kidnapped for he had him for like a like a few days and people were going bad shit and he you know the mob wanted him sam gee and conna said oh we'll find him we'll kill him the FBI the CIA uh and he was like uh he he left the gun and all the stuff up in Tahoe. They kidnapped in Tahoe and brought him down near my house in the

valley. And he went back up there and he's skiing, trying to, you know, trying to throw off the FBI and everybody's trying to. How did they finally get him? Get him back. They, he released him. Oh, he released him. He released him and then, then they went after him. Then they got Barry. How is it, how did he not get killed? Like, how did they let him live? He was shot out a couple times. Sinatra wanted to kill him. Of course. And, and the guy was in his 80s, I became friends with them. I said, we've got to do the story. He would come over my house a lot and stuff. And he just about two years ago shot himself, just out of the blue at a parking list. It's kind of sad now, right, that like the Italian mafia, they're not going to kill anybody

anymore now, unfortunately. I'd like to get murdered. I'd like to, I'd like that to come back. Well, I think the other mafies are stepping up. You got the Albanian mafia, got the Chinese mafia. You'll get popped by them. But I don't, I don't, I wish the Italian mafia just come back. You'd like to see some more bodies and trunks. You know what I mean? Just the old school kind lives you want that to come back just a little bit well you got your people tell them well i'm german so we want to do something different oh yeah yeah they like to clean the streets yeah so we get a swastika yet yeah yeah yeah you mean a second one yeah were you were you nervous having this guy in your house knowing that he kidnapped frank sinatra or was because he was older you felt like he was he was

he was old yeah i'm threatening i mean at first i was i was i was like i'm bringing this guy in my house but he you know he's a sweet guy he was you know he was he was in he was a mental mental, you know, he had issues. Mental lunatic, but by then he's old, he doesn't, you know. But I knew, so I met Sinatra, you know, and... You met Sinatra? Yeah. Wow.

What was he like? Hey, you know, like, it was... The good story is that my dad loves Sinatra, and, you know, you want to do something great for your dad, you know, because I love him. And I went to, I went to the concert and I tried to, you know, call the publicist and whatever. So, can we, you know backstage? If Frank wants to meet you, you'll know. I'm like, how the fuck am I going to know you? Yeah.

We go, Rickles opens. I didn't know him then. And then there was an intermission. This little guy, Tony O comes out, and says, I'm Mr. Sinaito, meet you now. So I brought my dad and my mom and everybody, and he's taking pictures and Boston people. My mom was drunk.

So she wants to hug him, and Jilly Rizzo got her in a headlock almost, you know. And we take pictures. And you could see Frank's like Boston, the photographer run. And my dad's over there not taking a picture. And I could see Frank look at him going like, you motherfucker.

Either that motherfucker thinks he's too cool to take a picture with me, or that's the coolest motherfucker on the planet. He didn't need a picture. He just wanted, and that's how my dad Do you think he was a fan of Full House? Sinatra, did he watch the show? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome.

I was there with Paul Abdul, actually. Ooh, yeah. Straight up. Frank Sinatra may be one of the coolest dudes in American history. I would put him up. As far as icon goes. Iconic, cool factor. I think you have Sinatra, you have a Dean Martin, a JFK.

Very cool. I worked with Sammy on General Hospital. That's great. That's amazing. My dad, Sammy Davis, was on the show. I said, who's a Sammy Junior guy? He said, why do you? Maybe listen to them records.

I said, what do I talk to them about? And he said, well, he's a musician, talking about playing drums. I wanted to play drums on the show, and they weren't really taking requests, you know. But there was a band set up, and I was telling, Mr. Davis, Jr., they won't let me play drums on here. And he said, hey, babe, you know. And we had this great conversation about music, and I think he got it. And he goes to the producers, and then he comes out to me, he says, just do what I say, man. And I do impressions, I do impressions.

That's really good. Very talented. Do this on tonight. Yeah, you know what I tell? I think I told the story. once before in there. And so he said, just do what I say it. I don't know what the fuck is that.

And he gets up there and he said, I introduced him as the character and he gets up, he says, Black, you played drums, right? And I'm like, it was totally ad-libbed. I'm like, yeah, and there was a drum set up there and I go up there and start playing and he was playing piano and I played music ever since. That's crazy.

That's crazy play with them. Did O's tell any of these stories? No, no. Dude, what do you think- What other guests do you have on you? We've had, we've had you, we've had, from YouTube, Ed Bassmaster We've had Matt Rife

We had many guests We had Matt Rife We had Matt Rife We have Tim Dillon Yeah Our fans don't like guests They like but we You gotta be very specific

You're very specific You've been spoken about many times On the show at special needs demos So to get the real guy in The fans were already Rebelling against those I saw like a few comments on Patreon They're like what the fuck

Fuck this guy Really? What the guest? Yeah they just They like us O's Oh on O Because we put it up early

Yeah That's why They're like You're gonna like You guys you're going to like you a lot but I want to ask what do you think because you've been around for a little while yeah what do you think you got to go no what time do you have to go you're good yeah okay what do you think what do you think what are you going I got to pick up my daughter I got to go

all the way back to where we live I promise my daughter I'd be there at pickup which is at 250 and then I got to take her to Sephora at the mall she's wants you know she wants makeup so I got I got no we don't need him do we no no no no no no what do you think what do you think about like is there been a drop off of talent? Like, do you see, like, the internet? Are you upset about it? Do you think, like, it used to be better when there was gatekeepers and then have, has the standard for entertainment gotten lower? Do you mean actors? Like, guys like Sammy Davis, Frank Sinatra, you don't have that anymore, right? Now we have Takashi 6-9. Yeah. But who's that? Yeah. Oh, exactly. You'll know. Yeah. But there's, you know, like, I'll find, but there is some great

talent out there, you know, like the, the beach boys, we're looking for a new drummer, and I found the guy who's playing now on Instagram. Really? Really? Yeah. So do you think, though, then, because of that, because how now it's not, doesn't really have a centralized location anymore, like a Hollywood, can you see in the future a Hollywood-type, a city like Hollywood becoming, going like the way of a Detroit, where Detroit used to be the car industry, and now it's just been so oversaturated that you don't need to make it in one place anymore, and Hollywood not having the power centralized as it once did, say 10 years

in the future? I think it still does have the power. Everything's still there. The studios are still there. A lot of people go, I'm going to go to New York and they, you know, what do they do out here?

A podcast. SVU at Law & Order. Yeah. Which I did. Yeah. Yes. But, no, I think Hollywood is... I'm not...

But for you guys, I think it's different for our... Our generation. You guys have paved a whole new thing. That's what I said. We had to carve our own niche. Like, you know, we... When did you guys...

When did you have your first one? 2018, I think of 17 we started. We did three years, and we took a three and a half year break and then we'd come back. So we've been doing this. again for a year. It's like four years total. Four years, yeah. People love it. People love it. People love it. So we think, though, that there is an interesting thing where, you know,

you start to see like the old world of Hollywood the old way. It just doesn't fit like there's all these career opportunities outside of it now. Like we both done very well this year and we both didn't even qualify for SAG after health insurance because we didn't make enough within the quote unquote business. But we made it all from our, you know, from our fans are the ones who support us. It's just weird. But that's been a great thing because you can directly to the fans. You can give them what they want.

They can give you money if they like you. Yeah, yeah. I don't know how to make it. Like someone says, how do I make it as an actor now? I'm like, I don't know what to tell people. Even as a comedian, I'm like, I don't know what I'm page. But to have, but look, a comedian.

Call Hitler good. It's people seem to, that's what the algorithm is rewarding right now. That's what they like. That's what we want. A comic can get a microphone and do their own, you know, podcasts. Actors can make their own movies now with telephone and stuff. Well, I've noticed, too, like you see a lot of guys now, like, you know, you see like a Matthew McConaughey doing like multiple commercials that I know he had said on podcast 10 years ago that he wouldn't want to do that. And now he's doing that because I just don't think the movies that they used to do are just worth it anymore.

Yeah, that's odd to, it's sometimes weird when these big guys do these commercials. But, you know, it's like a day's work and it's millions of dollars. It's amazing. It's hard to say. It's crazy that a lot of young people who will probably only know Will Farrell as the PayPal guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. I mean elf. Oh, elf. Yeah, that's what they know him. Elf is big. Elf on the show. How old is Billy?

He's seven. He's seven. So you're doing an elf on the shelf? Yes. Yep, same with me. Got to do that elf on the shelf. How old are you a 10 year old? I have a 15, 10, and four.

Oh, so they go, so you got to find that elf. I had no idea where, I mean, dude, you're running out of spots. I almost put it in the dog's ass last night. I have no idea where to go with it. Charge up the dog. Last year, we left the fucking things out in the office. And he knew there. They're out until Easter or something, you know.

Yeah. And then recently he goes, hey, the elf's going to come back. Yeah, December 1st, they have to come back. We did it. And then you get into fights with your wife over it because you'll wake up at 3 o'clock in the morning. Yeah, you go, fuck, oh, I didn't do it. I got to move the elf. You wake up the dog.

Why do you have to move the elf? Because the elves have to move every morning. The first thing my kids do is... But I do it at night, you do it at night, right? Well, we do it. But I'm saying sometimes, you know, putting these little kids to bed, you fall asleep, you're exhausted. Yes, then you got to wake up and then move the elf. Yeah.

like a big kid. You go to his house, he's got all his Disney stuff. Right. You love this. Yes. I do. You do. You hate it. Well, my parents... John's a Disney adult that we like. My parents... Oh, yeah, you guys treat... Because a lot of the Disney adults... Well, because a lot of times the Disney adults when they smile, they have very small teeth

and big gums. They're very weird... Google Disney adult smile, Jesse. And you'll see the big gums and the very small baby teeth. It's almost like their teeth... Do I have that? No, no, no. That's what I'm saying. You've got to be one of the most handsome... Disney you do the smile with the do the Disney adult teeth with the gums

and the baby teeth. And you see here. Don't listen to this fucking idiot. It's something, look at this. See, this is the Disney adult mouth. That's bullshit. No, but this is it. This is they got the, you can find anything on the internet. That's cold. That's not nice. Because they look in the mirror and their mouth, they look at their mouth, their teeth. Not being nice. But I'm just saying, look at this.

You know, by the way, yeah, I didn't see a lot of this, but I did see a lot of them are fat. Yeah, there are a lot of, you had to be a very skinny BMI health You don't look like your typical Disney adult My wife's a Disney adult She's into it It's a little crazy

Yeah there's outliers But most of them have this They're either very fat or They got the small baby teeth And the big... You guys are dark and evil We are You don't like happiness and joy

Right So we grew up in, we both grew up in Brooklyn So what? Disney wasn't big it just... Disney wasn't big Coney Island to die We went to Coney Island to die No, that's what it is

Disney wasn't a thing I couldn't just bring up to my You know, Bronx born father Like dad can you take him to Disney World He would get a cup of Oikos and throw it on my face Yeah, right? Yeah, my dad was, my dad, my parents treated me like I was 40 from when I was two.

Yes. So I did, but you have parents' issues. Well, that's Greeks, right? Greeks, you've got to work, got to run the business. So far you've got, you've made fun of Fallon, you'll never be on a show. Disney, you're never going to work for Disney. Who else did they beat up? Your sweater?

My sweater? We'll never get, we'll never get to borrow that. Yeah, that'd be good. What else? Who else to be big fun? Did you guys, have you ever get up? Nobody listens to that, really that important listens to that. this, right? No. No. No, well, who do we have? Who's, who do we have some, how about this? Can I ask you

this? This is an honest question. Well, I would like my joke. I just said his writing room as children. That's not a big deal. Is there any way you could pull the strings and somehow get us, even if it's only on Zoom, in person, in your seat would be amazing. Can you get us? No. Ethan Hawke. That's his favorite actor. Ethan Hawke. Besides John Stamos. If he's a friend, I don't know him. You don't know Ethan. No, you're supposed to say he's your favorite act. He's your favorite actor outside of john stay my yes spin this and win something no no that's uh that's who do you hate yet give us what i don't hate anybody though there's got to be someone you know i know i know i wouldn't someone on camera i know it's too people he hates yes the second one i know two people you

hate i can't say those names we're going to say those names we will reveal those names no we will not i met i met my ex-wife's husband recently Rebecca Romaine's husband She was so fucking peace Yeah she was beautiful Jerry I know I've met him a couple of times Nice guy Couldn't have been nice

He actually is a great guy Jerry You know I wanted not You know Couldn't have been nice He's comedy fan John's wife is graceful My wife now yeah Yes

She had you know this weekend I don't know what she's doing Because I'm But she had this beautiful She had this party at my house This weekend our house And all the kids from Billy's school came at about 50, 60

parents and everything, and they made baskets for kids that have lost their parents to ice, the farmer, farm workers. Go ahead and make jokes, asshole. I didn't say anything. I saw it. What was it? What? Oh, kids that lost their parents to ice. And they're giving them. They're giving them. They're making Christmas baskets and cards. Got it. For them to send to their parents?

No, they don't have it. Well, their moms, a lot of the moms are still around. Got it. But the dads, a lot of the dads. Yeah, because she does love it. Yeah. Yeah. What are you going to do? We had a Adrian name. What was it, Ice Dodgers? Something like the Brooklyn Dodgers. This person called themselves the Brooklyn Ice Dodgers. Yeah, the Brooklyn Ice Dodgers. Because they were a Latino Defend. All right, let's take a call. Yes.

Nick is on Snap benefits, if anyone wants to know. Snapchat benefits? Yes. No. What are you guys? Who do you like? Nick, any questions for John Stamo? Nick's a big TV fan. He doesn't know anything outside of the WWE? Nick, yeah. Do you want to see John Stamos in the WWE? What about John wrestling to Tonka or whoever?

Nick, were you a big full house fan? I was, yeah, huge full house. I would watch it every day after school and wrestling. Wrestling in full house was my two biggest things. So what would you, any questions for him? I actually stole one of your jokes from my stand-up. I used to do stand-up when I was in high school. And I stole something you said once.

Do you remember you had a flash forward with the twins when they grew up? Like you were worried that they were going to become nerds. And one of them was like, Dad, I signed up for a sport. and you're like, great, is it football, basketball? He was like, no, dad, chess, and you were like, oh, you know, so I kind of used that. So that's why you're making clips with us. Yeah, yeah. I don't remember saying that ever, Nick?

I said that joke or tag it? No, it was you. It was you. It was like a forward, you know, you had the babies and you were worried they were going to become nerds in the future. Oh, on the show? On full house, yeah. And you said you put that into a bit. I put that into a bit.

Yeah, I stole it. Sorry. Yes. Thanks, Nick. Yeah. Nick, he's ever saying anything like that again, you would be getting an ice bag. at your door we will get you out of here what do you guys what did you what was in the ice baskets what did you put in there gift cards and right presence and uh yes they uh my kid goes

to school with john choose kid who just directed wicked and he brought over a bunch of wicked sure stuff you guys seen that movie yeah um yeah i saw i saw wicked one my daughter's dying to see uh wicked too i got a ticket to see wicked too um yeah what's going on on that wicked set those girls look thin yeah you're a little thin that's a little yeah they need uh that it's a little yeah they need uh that It's a little bit. I know you see a lot of energy. Ariana Grande, it looks a little thin. Looks a little thin.

It looks a little thin. I did like Wicked One. If I'm going to be honest with you, all the reviews I've heard is that it could have ended at all. They got a little greedy where if you follow the creative, wicked, it should have just been one movie, but you want to get the extra cash, you get the second one,

and the second one's not as good as the first. That's what I heard. That's what I heard. He could have played Dr. Oveloom over Goldblum. He could have been a nice... Do you hear all the radios and computers turning off now because we're talking about all your fans like, okay, enough. Well, the gay ones are turning

it up. They're turning it up. We do have a small gay section. We have a, yeah. That's out of the closet. You'd be surprised at the people who listen to this pocket. You might think they're degenerance, and then you meet them and they're like lawyer. It's crazy. No idea. It's crazy. When we do our live shows, when we, the

people that we see, I mean, remember we did the live show in Brooklyn? You had like full girls, like Middle Eastern, you know, a thing, and then full Jewish guys Yeah. And I remember that. How about that? Asian gay lawyer. Asian gay doctor. Yeah, she was.

A guy doctor. Asian. Yeah, you got. You guys bring people together. We do. That's what we do. Yeah, we do. And we actually do, which I really enjoy.

I really like that because we just like to have a good time and we make fun of everything. You do. And you do walk the line. You don't, you know, you're sort of, you especially. Yeah. And we do. And by the way, we're on your side always. So you ever want us to do anything?

You want us to, like, you know, like maybe it'd be fun. Like, why don't we, uh, next time you come on, maybe we'll write roast trucks. We'll, like, roast the shit out of family matters, and Clarissa explains. All the shows that are around you will just fucking crush them. Okay. Let's just beat on them, growing pains. He'll love growing pains. Yeah, we'll make fun.

Yeah, but they love growing pain. Anybody that was around full house is our time slot will just rip them a new ass. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, well, that's what we'll do. Our fans will love that. Yeah, they'll do that, yeah. I love you guys.

I think you're super talented, super funny. And I'm glad that we, I'm glad I called you yesterday. I'm glad you came on. You could make some time for it because you have a pretty busy day today. What's next? So anything before the tonight show tonight? Shower. Nice.

I just, you're right. The sweater is, I like the sweater. I like the sweater. I like the sweater. Oh, what would you do before this? Where are you coming from? Kelly and Mark. Oh, great.

Mark can swell. We're talking about a hottie with a body. He's the only one that's got, that's in your league with hotter guys over 55 that are in shape and handsome. Mark is a hottie. I'd have sex with Mark over Kelly, no problem. You give me, you offer them both up on the table. I'm going Mark all the time, even though I think Kelly's beautiful. I really like.

to get inside Mark and Swellis type asshole. She's so small when you see her in person. We did that show when we did the fusion show. Yeah. Kelly is... She's a squeak, as we call them. Little people called the squeak. She's so small.

Yeah. She's cute. But yeah, Mark's a hiding. And so that's good. So you had a nice day of press. You're doing something with Gail King tomorrow. She's just going to interview me for an hour about something. An hour?

Well, yeah. Like a, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's the thing. Well, she's not on CBS anymore, though, right? What is it now? No, it's a live thing at Hearst at the Hurst at the Hurst building on there. Oh, beautiful.

We got to end on a better note than that. How do you like being a family man now? I love it. You love it. It's the best, right? Don't you guys? I mean, you love it. Yeah.

Was having a kid at set, you were in your mid-50s? And did you know, were you like, this was a surprise, or you knew the boys were still going? Yeah, we tried for a second one. It didn't happen, so. Yeah. But that's why I keep it clean. I got one kid, one wife, one ex-wife, one car, one house, and one dog. I like that.

You see that? Yeah. No, no. You got very, very strong swimmers. Well, I was just one. I'm saying, but the 55, you know? I had to, there was a lot of jerking, there was a lot of, Jerking off.

I had to, I had to get, have, you had to have. And that game brings us to make sure you watch Palm Royale, John's new show. Have you guys, have you guys had to give sperm at one of these things? Sure. You haven't done it? What I did, they wanted me, I did it. You did? I did it, but I didn't know they had to put it in the bag.

I just sprayed it all over the walls. I had no idea. I thought the bag and the cup with the cup. But the cup is too small. You guys should do this just for the joke of it all because this is no, this is not a bit. I swear to God I'm telling it too. I had to do it a couple times to see how the swimmeros. You go in and it's fucking embarrassing, first of all.

And, you know, I got a hat and glasses. I don't want anybody, you know. And then I'm, you know, do you come here often? I'm doing jokes. Yeah, that must be weird when they see you walk in there. Well, I, you know, and then they're John Stamos and it's like next. I'm like, fuck it out. There must have been girls at the door just listening.

Well, you could hear, I'm telling you. So she comes in, she goes, do you need a, you know, lou? You need me to hold that for you? Every time it comes about it, da-da-da-da-da-da-ta. Well, oh, course. She goes, do you need lube? I'm like, no, I don't need no lube. You know, there was a big jar, like a glass jar of it, like, like condiments or something.

I thought it was mayo, you know. And so then I said, I don't need that, you know. And then if you'd like some pornography, we have the thing. Sure. Please, I don't need anything. And then I'm in there like, give it all, I need all. Because it's so embarrassing. And I could hear them talking outside.

They were talking about some shows. They must have sit in there. Well, they were talking about, I can't remember some show about the brother and sister having sex together. That was a turnoff. And I swear, here's the bit, I swear to God. So there was a TV on there.

I said, oh, fuck it. I'm going to turn this TV on. I'm going to put some porn in something. And I turned it on, and whoever was watching, whoever was on there before was on the Netflix page and Fuller House was on the page. I swear to God.

And I said, if I'm going to jerk off to myself, it's going to be the old one. You just spray it alone and a little for Kimmy Kibler. You wanted the yogurt version. Yeah. I thought it was funny. Yeah. Well, whoever was in there was jerking off the Fuller House?

Well, it was Netflix or something, but the page. What did you end up jerking off to? Do you remember? Something with little people involved. Little people. Yeah. Now, the crew laughs. That's the way.

If you wanted to know, John, what's the best way to end the podcast? Right. It's John Stamos. talking about him jerking off to his own face at full house. And that's what we get here on the history hyenas. And that's what I think you should bring up on the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallanty. Yeah, I'd say tell that story. Open with that.

That'll get views. Yeah. Also, do get his book. It's a fun read. Also, the show with Chris DeWig, tell people when it air. It's on Wednesday night. It's on Apple. There you go.

There it is. And Hunting Wives. Hunting Wives. Now I love you. I've been a fan. Thanks. I want to come over. Well, let's not push it.

But we could, I'm kidding. We should have pizza next time you know. Let's do it. Let's do it, dude. We'll hang out next time for sure. I'm happy you guys are back together. We all are, all the fans. Thank you.

It was a great day when you guys finally kissed and made up. Yes. You know, yeah. All right. Well, now we're back and now... Do you want me to go pick up your daughter instead of you? That would be fucking wild. I mean, if you came out and picked up my daughter, she would ask you if you know Mr. Beast.

Yeah, right, right. That's all over the day. Yeah. Uncle, oh. All right, boys. All right, everybody. Thanks for having me. John Stamo.

All right, let's do the list. Yeah, here we go, Caj. Because, as always, we like to read our newest members of the matriarchy who went to Patreon.com slash history hyenas and join the fun. We have so much content there. We have unedited episodes there, ad-free episodes there. But the best part is the fans. I mean, dude, our fan wrote a Christmas poem that is for the ages, a home run, only available

at patreon.com slash history hyenas. And then, of course, you get your name right out at the end of an episode. John Stamos just left and he cut my hair as he was leaving. Yeah, and you know we're lying because we're wearing different outfits. That's what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes I can't tell who's who shoot John Stamos or Michael J. Foxx. It's what it is.

It's what it is. So it's a loit side joke. Okay, here we go. Pretty Kitty getting my meowth. Nice. Pretty kitty get my meowth. Very good word play. I like it.

Very good world play. Not enough. Then we got Welcome to the Matriarchy. clean up on Isle Epstein. Okay. Not bad. Not bad. Then we got Supreme Nami Lada 14 walked into one.

Latter 14. Okay. Yeah, borderline, not horrible. Jerry Green, Opo backup, load blown in the home zone. No more vacuum your own. Okay. Okay. Brett Wilson.

Andrew Gommel. Kyle Carole Clean. Lance Wright. Thomas Moser. Two kids off this Polish hammer. Call it a Blitzkrieg. Big B. A Leroy that hates.

Okay I grew up off Knickerbocker Avenue Okay Blue Jew makes my panzer go pewing Wayzong she ain't Jose Becerra Okay Akash Singh finding out he's a cock

Must be a real low blow Call it a Poon jab It's a friend of the family So we disparaged that We don't like that kind of content But I do have to acknowledge It's a good one You just have to acknowledge

We can't not acknowledge it Yeah But it is we don't like that kind of stuff. RJ F. H. Challenging wank. The challenging wank is very funny. Sometimes you have a challenging wank. Yeah, it's just what it is. You're really drunk or you're on Coke. It's a challenging wank. Guess what? Welcome to the fucking lexicon. Yeah. I like a challenging way. But they're not on the list, but they're in the lexicon. The lexicon is because it is a category of jerks. Yes. Have you ever had a challenging way? Where you're doing it? You're going

like, I really don't need to be doing this. Yeah, but it's just doing it anyway. And you don't really, your body doesn't want it, but you yank what it is. You got to get through a challenging you way yeah you stay committed um germany's ultimate frisbee coach um not a good one meredith gaffney 37 frozen grapes in my asshole cuss okay we had that guy yep leroy's daycare cuddle time fumes okay day shift stripper keep your hips and nips away from my chips and dip i'm just trying to eat okay james napper larry nasser was off the balance being big very true good larry nancer was the who molested all those gymnasts. Way Sung Sien.

When does Timu, Freddie Freeman, and Down syndrome, John Stamos, fuck? We had that. Did we? Yeah. Interesting. Okay. Did it, Michael Oysher, Zorn, don't walk Josephine through Frushing Prize? That's on the list, right?

Got to. You got to put it out. You got to. You don't want to lose Josephine. Josephine is my sympathy. Husky puppy. She gets snatched. Yeah, she'd get into a friar real quick.

That's actually a genius. That's actually a really good one. That's a great joke is when you say it without saying it. Yeah, you're saying it without saying it. If you don't understand, Flushing is an area in Queenswood. There's a lot of Asians. It's what it is. And I have a dog.

Dogs go missing all the time. Leroy piece with a Jesus piece, Yamin. James Graham. Jimmy Kimmel doesn't actually cry every episode. His frisbee boss is too chief to pay for a leaky roof. Could be true. sat on my sack And now I have to clap

Ladafo Hey is a slur Uh not okay Not a muzzy But number one on Isis list Okay Wyatt It's an achievement

Hey babe can you heat up my glue gun Oi veam about the shabust Eat ice cream out of my asshole Bumped uglies with a haggis monkey Now my glue gun shoots whiskey Hashtag it burns when I pee Haggis monkey has got a scottish Scottish guy. I like it.

Papa Bear. Let's go, Buzz. Snicker Fritz 3, Dylan Howell, Snow, Steve Helm, Dennis Loom, Irish Dagger, J.G. Tyler. Well, a whole page without even a Drexler. Well, we got one on the list only. Yeah, we got one on the list. No Drexler. But we don't even, this is weak so far. This is, this is noticeably weak. Yeah, it doesn't mean we don't appreciate you guys, but we assign you to straight to the back. Yeah, it's just what is going for it. You're all straight to the back.

You're here for the content. But this is. But this is what it is with these lists is you just have to keep listening. I just don't know what's coming. Delsey Anecken, Aaron, Instagram at Timmitt. Good, screwed in. My girl's calzone cannons gave my glue gun CTE. Calling Tits calzone canons because they do leak ricotta when she's pregnant.

Yes. I like that. That's fun. So read the whole thing again. My girls calzone canons gave my glue gun CTE. I can say, I mean, it's like a whole. Almost there. I'll Drexler that. For the Calzone cannons, it's very funny.

Coln Titties that. Then we got straight to the crack because I'm black. So it just doesn't guess? It's good, though. I'm going to Drexler it. Zoran, watch out. He's got a bomb donnie. Way Song She ain't. Decent, right?

Yeah, she's got to be walked into one. Travis Tiner, Ruben Rivera, Jijin Pingpong's Duck Sauce Packet? Weissong Seen. Drexler. Matthew DeMarco. Now we're heating up. Dad voted for Mom Donnie.

Now he's underneath the mistletoe with his ass in the air. Way song she ain't. I'm going to list it. I can't list it. It's kind of funny. It's kind of funny. I'm going to list it. Yeah.

Admiral Scaliwag. Kyle Schultz, got no thumbs because Grams didn't dodge Agent Orange. Okay. Okay. Said he's got a birth defect. Right. Oh, right, right, right. Sorry to hear that

Killicam Balli Femis and Odius Puss Stephen Giannetta Sauce Monkey Garrett Avery Donica J. Lewinsky Chloe Dinger's Cat Zakelis Klausen

Sam Dixon Guido Zoran Bamdani again That's interesting Juju Joshua Hi Juju Joshua

Joshua Skuluna Eastern Hemi Hip Hop superstar Gucci Lomaine Ryan A couple of dings in the basement Could only see it when they smile Lotta 14 No, can't do that

That's a walk-in one that's very, very bad Yeah, very bad We don't support that Tiny Peace unless you ask my niece We had that No, we've never had that But that is disturbing Yeah

Yeah We don't have that tiny piece Unless you ask my niece Yeah It's a pedophilia joke Pedophilia joke Yeah Michael Gladiou

Still throwing batteries At Hey Bert Okay Walk in a one Can't get rid of that one I can't discharging Family yeah Pumann, Michael Beldovin

Sorry about Sorry about the mess Wait, sorry about the mess This is Yeah, this is too, I'm sorry Sometimes they're too long And I can't even read them Ethan Young

Bay of Plenty floor sanding Bob Jack William Triantis Frank Lizzo takes a cheesecake physically Hashter Crumbum Bill Clinton's hip-fired glue gun Jimmy Newfield Big Chungis Lil Hans Landa

aka the squeak hunter Guy Anita Fatone Ryan Dodson Liam One more page I mean But this is very lackluster so far

So but that's okay We don't know Wilson X On the beam in a different way Hashtag lead in the gay Okay Michael hash Blowverine

David Arno Uncle Jesse stink Rinkle Zach Yeah Zach Tudor Bust Rhymes lips have gotten larger since he went

supersonic. I don't know what that means. He's Buster Rhymes' lips. Okay. Hugh Johnis, Emily Woods, Orlando Prado, Moran Zamdani,

5 milligrams of Lexapro to take the edge off, your mom, Tyler Salazar, Kim Jack Un, Alejandro O'Conn, salmon shorts and boat shoes, Aunt Tuddy's Bookie, Ice agent, Andrew Schultz.

Chase, Leroy, dad, left Asian mom, call it ding-dong ditch. Wayzong-Chi-Ain. He's out of control today. You remember dig-dong ditch or ring and run? Yeah. It's a really good one, but it's a walked-in one. Yeah. And Tony, just put it, you know.

Yeah. These are late contestants for our list that we're going to be reading next week. Cody Nantzio, Nick, Sean McNamara, Luca McNeil, I cockblock women, it's what it is, emotional support chicken finger, just call me Smokehouse because I got all the meat hanging iron workers local 103, okay, Galane's Pixie Cut, Andrew G, Eptitia, big tries till my dad dies. Pushing down the gay. Pushing down the gay. Drexler for that. Laser beam, Leroy, gas, Station fried chicken Tax monkey fatigue Came for the Chrissy D stayed for the Yanni P

The tax monkey fatigue is a walked into one Tax monkey is Jewish Yeah Tired Calling him tax monkeys Put it on the walked into one list Please Tony

So came for the Chrissy D Stay for the Yani P Heil hyenas Mine Roof Ladder Vicentine And then This is the last but not least Because we're only doing three

Six million Jews That's 12 million tits Ladder 14 Because you say the guys are out of shape as well Yeah, yeah So unfortunately You got your work cut out for you Yeah so this actually

I mean Do we have a choice Because we only have two that are on the list Do I keep reading them to see if we have anything We've never been in the situation No I think we do here a lot I think it's just this is the nature of the list It's just what it is

So there's only two to choose from today We didn't even make three and that happens Very rarely has this ever happened This may be the only time that we've only had two in the... But it had... We basically narrowed it down like we usually narrow it down.

It's narrowed down for us. Yeah. Last week's list was incredible. Yeah. So it happens. It's just the way it goes. So the list is, dad voted from Mamdani.

Now he's underneath the mistletone with his ass in the air. Probably going to win. Or don't walk Josephine through Frushing Priz. Oh, those are two goodies. So it's actually harder than we think. Yeah, it's two goodies.

So we have don't walk Josephine through Frushing Priests. Or Dad voted from Mom Dani. Now he's underneath the mistletoeoe with his dance in the air. Yeah, they're both really good. It's whether we want to go political and New York or we want to just go, they're both really funny. So it's tough. Yeah, yeah. Don't walk Josephine through Frushing Priz is very, to me, it's almost like cerebrally funny. You know, I like a joke that's layered. Saying it without saying it. Instead it without saying it. You have to know things.

You know, you have to know that Frashing's Asian. You have to know the Asian produced, you know, mixed the L's and the R's. You have to know I have a dog named Josephine. And then, but then the ass in the air on the mistlet told someone's dad is a very funny image. Like if you said, oh, my friend, but your father, I mean, think about his guy in his 60, he's throwing his ass in the air under the missile. It creates a funny image. Yeah. I don't know, man.

This is a tough one. What do you guys think? Let's ask the boys. Yeah, I think I'm going, uh, frushing. I think that's just a funny layered joke. Yeah, I like both of them, but I was born in Frushing and I like the pre's at the end also. Yeah, I see things. Yeah, what do you think?

We're going local. You got to know. You got to know there's a lot of Chinese. flushing. Yeah, it's just funny. And so we're going to do one for the boys and queens. It's what it is. You're a New Yorker. You're going to love this one. We're a New York podcast, so let's give it to it's where the votes right there. You're the winner. You can see your name up in lights at history. Hyenas is back.com. You are a winner. Don't walk Josephine to Frushing Prius.