History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - Nazi Plan to Bomb NYC | History Hyenas

Episode Date: August 21, 2025

Did you know that Hitler had a master plan to try and destroy NYC? He was all set on trying to bomb the Big Apple. Kid must have been real jealous of how lit, money-making Manhattan is. Fortunately, he ran into some problems and the plan never took off (Literally), because, as you know, Allah put the Red, White, and Blue between the Atlantic and Pacific Ocshhh to protect His chosen children. Lets be honest, the kid would have never tried to bomb the boroughs if he had ever strolled the city just once with the boys and gotten some smoothies, because it is just too cute of a city and that would have been to cute of a time! Support our sponsors: Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://BlueChew.com! Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code HYENAS -- just pay $5 shipping .For a limited time get 40% off your first box PLUS get a free item in every box for life. Go to https://Hungryroot.com/HYENAS and use code HYENAS. Join our Patreon at 👇for weekly bonus episodes and more! https://www.patreon.com/historyhyenas/ Subscribe to the poddy woddy Our YouTube!: https://bit.ly/2ARdDOz HH Clips:https://bit.ly/2YaK2Z8 iTunes: https://apple.co/2UQTHCc Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3fxtsc0 Hyenas Merch!!! https://historyhyenaspod.com/merch Follow us Cuz! 🙆🏻‍♂️ Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ 🙆🏼‍♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🐕More Hyenas Website: www.historyhyenasisback.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/historyhyenas/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/HistoryHyenas Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/historyhyenaspod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Guys, we got a great episode for you. We're going to talk about Adolf Hitler wanting to invade New York City during World War II. A lot of people don't know that the Nazis made it all the way to Long Island. And it's a wild story, baby. It's absolutely wild. We get into Operation Pistorius. Catch me in Poughkeepsie this weekend. Miami, Bakersfield, California, Toronto, Tulsa, Bozeman, Montana, Stanford, Connecticut.

Yeah. And then go get our merch at History Hyenasis is Back.com. We got brand new merch. It's going to come to. We've got a new store in one week. And you can go to Christycomedy.com. I'm in Toronto, Detroit, and Pittsburgh this weekend. And then Chicago Theater, September 5th, theater at Madison Square Garden, September 11th, and Saudi Arabia, September 27th.

History A&Is Back.com for all our stand-up dates. Enjoy the episode, babe. What's up, everybody, welcome to another episode of history, hienas. We got a wild episode for you today about how the Nazis tried to bomb New York City in 1940. I'm Chris Stefano, a.k. Chrissy D. And with me, as always, Janice, aka Yanni P. And I know just by looking at his hair, the kids having a day. I'm having a day.

I mean, look at that hair. Is it not good? Is it not looking cool? No, it looks good because it looks like you were just driving here on the Long Island Expressway with your head out the window just to get a little air because the walls are closing in. The walls are closing in. That's what life could do to you once in a while. And, you know, what would be nice if I could just take a nice short trip to the Hampton? to just cool it out You look a little beat up

Life could throw a couple of curveballs at you And it just keeps coming at you You're gonna get a break here and there But just make no mistake about it It's just a break Because the beam What is it? What did I call it?

The devil's beam The devil's... What did I call it? The devil's stick will knock you off the beam The devil's... Yeah, oh you called it The devil, was it the devil's peen? I think it was the devil's...

The devil's peep will knock you off the beam. Now go like this. Just put your arm up like this. Cus, you got the tits, you got the hair. You look like the Statue of Liberty. This is what life basically is. It's a tight rope walk on the beam. Yeah.

Except it's like the game Frogger. And the devil's peen is constantly swiping at you to get you off the beam. Yeah, cuz. And it will get you off. So the whole point is to just get back on. It's make absolutely no mistake. You have survived. But the devil's peen did hit you in the side of the head and knocked their hands.

hair straight up. And also I was in Tampa for the weekend. Let me tell you something. If there's a place that wants to get you off the beam, it's Tampa. It's also a place never to take your daughters. If you are a guy, if you're a girl dad with daughters, you never take them to Tampa. No. Because nobody wears clothes down there. Nope. I mean, you got girls walking around that are like 14 years old that are wearing no clothes with like shorts, like where you can see the bottom of their ass. I mean, it's ridiculous. I was walking around and it just looked like there was a bunch of girls who escaped Epstein's Island who just kind of swam up on shore.

It's one of those things where, of course, you know, if you're having trouble maintaining an erection or getting erection, we encourage you to go to bluechew.com, putting that promo code hyenas. But if that doesn't work for you, then you just walk into Ebor City, Tampa, and you will get bricked up.

You will get bricked up. A lot of people go straight to pharmaceuticals, but there's a lot of national natural remedies that people can take, one of which, like, look, if you're in a bad mood, you're feeling depressed, go to Miami. Yeah. Just give somebody $2,000 to go to Miami.

you're going to feel real good. If you're having trouble getting it up, definitely take a blue chew if it's our promo code. But if not, just go to Tampa. Like Chris said, you'll get bricked up. And if you're a spy, don't send them to the Hamptons. Yes. Well, we're going to talk to you about today.

We're going to get to that part. But did you know that the Nazis, Adolf Hitler? I almost said my man, Adolf Hitler. So sorry that I thought that. I didn't mean. I was just, it was just vernacular. But Adolf, young Adolf. he wanted to invade New York City

I had grand plans to invade America I did not realize and we're going to teach you all about it today I did not realize that Adolf Hitler and the Nazi party absolutely despised the United States and they thought and this is I was watching a Hitler speech and one of the things that he said You're doing that as your ASMR to get to sleep like you usually do Yeah well I always tell I tell my kid

Put the fucking Bluetooth in and you just listen to Adolf Hitler's sleep Well my family just like a fucking baby My family just thinks this whole history hyena's podcast is just about the Nazis because every single Sunday night, I tell the kids I can't put them to bed because I have to go do research and it's me just watching YouTube Hitler speeches in English. So my kids just don't. And then even Jasmine has been like, it's every week you guys talking about the Nazis. I said, yeah. So even if we got to prepare for Genghis Kana, just throwing a little Hitler speech. That's what you like to do.

So but he hated Adolf Hitler in one of his speeches in 1941. So right in the beginning of the war, he hated. FDR in the America and he said and made me laugh out loud he called first of all he said FDR first of he thought FDR was a Jew and he wasn't a Jew but then he said FDR keeps the spirit of the eternal Jew alive yeah he would call it the eternal Jew and he said the eternal Jew is infiltrated New York City so I just thought it was funny that he called it the eternal Jew yeah he he looked at America as like this morally corrupt diverse uh Jew capitalist kind of place, but, you know, he really couldn't help but be a little jealous

and envious of our cities. He liked our big cities and stuff like that. And it just, you know, that's why he wanted to make Germany. He was planning on doing this massive city with these big buildings because he wanted to compete with the USA because at the end of the day, everyone is envious. Yes. Or admires the USA. Because once you look at the big apple, once you get a look at the Empire State building, once you get yourself a slice, once you go get yourself a little Italian food, once you go get yourself a Frankfurter and a Kinnish, you can't help but say, wow, this is the greatest city in the world. What am I doing? Why did I go to Austin, Texas? Yeah, yeah, because I haven't had a Kanish in so long. And unfortunately now,

Kanishes, which is one of, I think, the best Jewish foods, they don't have Kanish stands in New York City anymore. So that's why, unfortunately, I've had to go outside. synagogues and start biting Jews. Way song she ain't. That's it, yeah. Because I'm just looking for potatoes and mustard in a hot potet. That's the point when you go on the carnivore diet, but you also miss a canish. That's what you got to do.

I'm just obviously kidding. And I assume you're on a new diet at this point. Are you trying to carnivore diet now? Because I'm going to tell you, I'm going to get to some fun facts about why not, about why Adolf Hitler was obsessed with the United States. But before we do, I do just want to be honest with you, because you know I'm always going to be honest with you. Yeah. is I fell off the beam big this weekend. So what I did, I had what you call a little social anxiety.

Yeah. It popped up on me and I need to get on some medication. I need a little space. But I had some social anxiety. What happened was is first of all, look at these sneakers, cute, Kith. What? Yes, Kithies, little soccer shoes. Yeah.

Not for me, but okay. Yes. So Kith, the great people at Kith. Yeah. Invited me, one of the great clothing companies in New York, invited me to go to their fashion show and to sit front row at a fashion show so I said, yes. So I said, I'm going to go.

And then what happened was it started to pour rain and I just said, well, I don't want to get my new Kith shoes wet. I said, that's probably not going to look good. I don't even know what to do at a fashion show because it's usually just for girls or gay guys. And so I go drive all the way down from my house all the way down, took an hour of traffic to go to the Kith Fashion Show

downtown at our store in Lafayette Street, Manhattan. And then it started to rain. and then the show was going to start in 15 minutes and I got a bunch of social anxiety and I said, I'm not going. I said, I'm not going to walk in there even though it was so easy. I had a ticket.

All you have to do is sitting in chair. I said, I'm not doing it. I also had four shows at the comedy cell. I said, I'm not doing those. I also got invited to Tim Dillon's party in the Hamptons. I said, not do that. And instead, what I did, is I went to a little place called hamburger America.

Uh-oh. Which is two blocks away from the event and I got three cheeseburgers and I said to myself, you're going to eat one and you're going to bring two home for your daughters. Right. So I said, I'm going to have these three cheeseburgers,

and I put them in the passenger seat, and I said, you'll eat them all together as a family. And so then when I was driving down 6th Avenue, I said, oh, there's the, I think it's called Morgan Stern's ice cream. I saw the ice cream. I said, you know what my kids would love from there is ice cream sandwiches? So they have the honey vanilla ice cream sandwich, and they have a banana chocolate ice cream sandwich.

So I said, I'm going to get three. I'm going to get one for me and two for my daughters, because Jasmine has made it clear that she doesn't want to eat unhealthy because we had had a really bad weekend of eating pizza and pasta and we had people over. So I said, okay, let's just get three. I'm going to have one because I'm going to have protein. I'm just going to eat the meat.

And then I'm not going to eat the ice cream. My daughters can split one and a half. And what happened was is I was driving down 6th Avenue and started to rain again. I got stuck in a little traffic and the anxiety started creeping up again. And I saw a girl walk across the street that I really wanted to pork. And I said, you can't do that. Yeah.

So I said to myself, the anxiety now has to go somewhere. So it's going to go into my stomach. Yeah. And by the time we were on sixth. Avenue and Bleaker Street. By the time I got to the West Side Highway, which was just five blocks away, but a couple of street lights, I ate all three cheeseburgs and all three ice cream sandwiches. And I swear to God, that's a true story. And I came back and what I did is I threw, I did, I kind of found myself in my own ways. I threw the garbage out. I threw the garbage out in a, in a public garbage can. And I stayed in the city. I drove around some loops around in the city for another 45 minutes. Just to kind of let the time go by to make it seem like I went to the Kith event and I went to all my comedy shows. And then I got home at the time that I normally would have gotten home. And my family was like, how was everything? I was it was great. It was in the front row. Did my steps. I ate some salmons. Did my shows. And then they were like, oh, good. And then, you know, because there was just a

new me, about five minutes went by. And I said, have to be honest with you guys, I'm lying. You just, I'm lying. I said, I didn't go to the show. Did you hit the group chat after that? I didn't do in the show. No, I didn't, I didn't have to hit the group chat, but I got close. Right. And so I ate, I ate, so in the, in this weekend, I had, because I had those three ice cream sandwiches and three cheese burgers yesterday. But then on Saturday, I had four to five slices of pizza, pasta, canolies. I tried to eat a salad just to throw something in there. And then for breakfast, I had a bacon, egg, and cheese. I had two back-to-back donuts. And then I got a double chocolate chip muffin. I toasted it with butter. So what I did is fall 100% off the beam. Because the social

anxiety just basically I look like what you look like on the outside. I look like that on the inside. Now, what would cause the social anxiety? It's one of those things that came out of nowhere, okay? They just came out of nowhere like the Japanese. They came right out of nowhere and I couldn't and I couldn't really stop it. Probably just didn't, why don't you just take Debo with you? That's, when you ever have social anxiety, just bring one of your neighborhood friends with you and I should have. I should have done it because I really, but I will say you have to think about bottom lines and what's good, what's bad. It was just food. Yeah. It was just food. Didn't turn to alcohol or drugs or anything else. It was just food. It

It was just food, and then I worked out really hard last night. When I got home, I tried to work it off. And then this morning I brought a homemade yogurt that I made with protein, and I got an avocado toast with nice, low-saturated fat, no cholesterol. So you just got to recalibrate yourself. I got – my point is I got hit with the devil's peen, too. Yeah. Tampa came to New York. And I got hit in the head hard with the peep.

Yeah, he swiped you right off. Yeah. The devil's peeing will knock you off the beam. The problem is you're a German – you only have like 10 percent Italian. in you. Yes. The rest of it's German with, I think there was like a little Irish in there. And there's some Jew. And you got Jew in there? I told you, but the Ancestry.com has like

5% Jew in there. Yeah. So I think that part, that part comes out and I get a little anxiety. That's got to be from that. But I think mostly German, you know, you guys don't know what to do it yourselves if you're not killing people. Right. So if you're not, like, because these are Viking genes, right? These are genes. Look at

his head. That did not happen. He's not built that way genetically because they were thinkers. No. They don't come from thinkers. You're, you know, you're, you come from, you, you were climbing up on shores and killing priests, yes. Taking women and throwing them over your shoulder and doing things. And so you just feel like, if you're not doing that, you feel like, what is my purpose? Well, one of the things that I eat the most is I do salmon, I do berries, and I do yogurts, and that I just read the thing in the newspaper the other day. That's called the Nordic diet. They believe that's what

the Vikings used to eat is salmon, yoghirts and berries. Yeah. So that's what I naturally eat because I have Viking DNA. It's what I like. I like salmon. Yeah. You have, you have Viking DNA. There's no question about it. You're a Germanic kid. Yeah. And their dramatic kids were big and they were strong and they like to kill. And they like to kill. They like to kill. They like to kill. They like to kill. Some people like to play chess. Germanic people like to kill. They like to kill. And for the, I've been living in my new home for 14 days. And I do, I will say the I will take, I'm trying to look for positives everywhere. I don't think in absolutes anymore. I had a bad eating weekend. I can't get around that. But the positive is, is for the first time in 14 days, I did finally muster up the courage and I went into my basement. I walked to my basement. I walked to my basement. I went down there because jazz told me I had to go get the cardboard Sunday nights and I said yeah but it's in the basement Wow and there's no lights on she said and she looked at me she said Chris your daughters are listening to you go in the fucking basement and she said it like that through her teeth and I did it

and I went and I ran I sprinted and I asked my older daughter Delilah to watch me at the stairs just in case I fell and she was like I'm right here daddy and then I ran out and I ran into the basement and the basement's kind of cute so you've been missing it out. You see you were scared of nothing. It was nothing. So now, so I, and then I, I almost went down there again this morning because the Jasmine asked me to open up the basement door for the workers and I said I couldn't do it. Yeah. I almost went down. Because your hair wants Christmas bad. Yeah, your hair is, because you got your little curl hanging down and wants an ornament on it. You see the Christopher Reeves curl hanging out? Well, I'm actually thinking I'm going to cut my hair. I'm going to do a four all around and just cut it down. Are you going back Brooklyn style? I want to go back Brooklyn style because I'm getting a little tired of, of, of doing it. Yeah, you're tired of looking like Soho white. You're. You're tired of looking like Soho white. You're. You're. You're tired of looking like Soho white. You're. You're. You're. You're tired of looking like. You're. You're. You You want to go back to borough trash white. And I see that that cuts coming back in now, like a four, like a, not a shaved head, but like some, you know what I mean? Like, like, how Jesse, like, you know what I mean? Like, you used to have the shave part in there?

Right. Yeah, are you going back to that? Well, I want to cut it down. Like, I want to just, like, cut it where it's like, I don't have to put any product. I could just wake up and go. That you'll be able to fit in a hat. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You could fit in an extra large hat. You think you'll ever cut down your hair? No, I can never, I look like a bird. Right. I'll look like a bird. Yeah. Yeah. I can't. I look like a mouse when I do this.

Because, by the way, real quick, if you go to history hyenas is back.com, all this merch. We got brand new merch. We change stores. You order a shirt now. You're going to get it in a week. Okay. No more T-spring. We got a great merch company. Look at all this. We got it here. Brand new merch. Some of the old designs updated. Nice cotton shirts. We got new designs coming. But history hyenas is back.com. Go get yourself some new merch. You'll get it in a week, puppy. Yeah, we also got history hyenas pod.com, so whichever one you want to type. We got new designs coming. We got Leaky Roof shirts.

We got four Rome shirts. We got a new coffee mug up there, which is flying off the shelves. It's a coffee Leroy cup. Yeah. But the merch comes right to you. No more waiting. Go get your merch right here. Patreon.com slash history hyenas for our bonus episodes.

Oh, that's pretty fun. Some of our best are up there. Go join the matriarchy. Go see all the photoshops. The Patreon episode today is Wild One. So go over there. Now, Cush, do you know, here's something I learned in our Hitler wanting to bomb New York City. Do you know in World War I?

We all know Hitler fought in World War I, right? He was just a soldier. And then, you know, the United States entered World War I and was fighting directly in Germany. And there was a battle where Germany Nazis, well, not the Nazis at the time, the German army was retreating. And Hitler was one of them. And the United States was chasing them. And Hitler, as he was retreating away, noticed two American soldiers that had their helmets off with blonde hair and blue eyes. And he said, when he writes in his book, he said, that was the moment.

I realized those are the Uba Mensch, blonde hair, blue eyes. And he believed that the biggest gene pool of Ubermensch were in the United States because he believed all the elite people of Europe, because we were a nation of immigrants in the United States, came to the United States. So if you made it to the USA, you had in your DNA that elite. to you, where if you stayed back in Europe, you may not be elite, but he believed everybody in the United States was elite. And the fact that he was not a kid with blonde hair and blue eyes, but was obsessed with the Ubermensch having blonde hair and blue eyes meant one thing and one thing only. He was a gay kid. There's no way the kid wasn't gay. If he saw those guys instead, yes. Well, I mean, he was definitely an interesting kid when it comes to his sexuality. There's a lot

of theories, right? He was a guy obsessed with control. And what I think about that, is guys who are usually obsessed with control, they like to get their nuts kicked around a bit. What it is. And he had an affair with some chick, some German chick in the 30s, who had he might have been an actress or something, who said that the kid definitely liked to get peed on.

He wanted me to defecate on his chest, and he liked to get kicked around a bit, and that's what turned him on. So that's one account. Now, whether you believe her or not, he was a kid who maybe just liked to get his nuts stepped on. It's what it is. Yeah, and usually that's the case

When people who are obsessed with control, they want to balance themselves out by being in no control. But don't you think if I said to you, the perfect man, the perfect man for me is the guys that I want a whole country of these men are six foot two black men with dreadlocks, wouldn't you say, well, Chris is a gay, he's a gay man and he likes black guys with dreadlocks. I would. That's what Hitler did. Hitler doesn't look like that. I always said, I really want six foot two blondie, blue-eyed hotties. I would. So that's just a gay man.

I would, yeah. I think that that might have been a big part of his sexuality. Also, there's this rumor that he lived with his niece for a while, right? And then his niece ended up killing herself. So there's speculation that maybe he was doing something with his little niece. Hold on. That's okay. What's going to take this call?

Take it. But I can't do it on speaking. We'll take a pause. The one thing we do know about Hitler is that he liked them young. Most leaders do. Yeah, they like them young. I mean, when he met Eva Braun, he was 40 and she was. 17. And then there's a story about his niece. And then, of course, you got the chick that I

referred to. I said it was the 30s, but it's actually the 20s. Her name was Mimi Reiter. And she met Hitler in 26 when she was 16 and he was 37, I believe, right, or something like that. And she said that he had some abnormal sexual requests, including shitting on him. Yeah, which we call corprophilic tendencies. Which we call that a gym. Give me to Jim Norton with cheese. Yeah, so corprophilic tendencies is that's, I want to see somebody put that in their dating profile, say that they have corprophilic tendencies and screenshot it and send it to us. Yeah, and then there was Gili, or Gileile, Rabal, who was his niece, who possibly was a sexual relationship.

It's not proven. And they say that he subjected her possibly to sexual, degrading sexual acts. She killed herself at 23, which fueled the speculation. And, of course, Eva Braun, who I said he was 17 when he was 40 or something like that. And they met. And, of course, she was devoted to him and killed herself with him. So, definitely liked him young. But, yeah, there's also rumors.

Historians think the rumors started because they were his enemies that said he was gay. But you make a good point. If you're obsessed with dudes who look great and are buff and nice and, you know, they look like the dude from True Blood, who was the blonde. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's what he liked. Yeah, he would have looked at you and he would have went. He would have went pewing for you. Yeah. Yeah. So it just made me feel like the kid was a little gay. Because he looked like a Jew. He did. He looked Jewish. He did. And he probably actually was. Yeah. That's what some historians even say that they could find Jewish ancestry in his DNA too. Now, the kid wants to bomb New York City. Okay. So they have this plan. You know, you couldn't just fly a plane across the Atlantic Osh back then. You could, but not like a war plane, right? You had to refuel it some way. like America, we could get things to Germany because we could just fly to England and then regroup and whatever. But how are these German planes going to fly from Berlin, bomb New York,

and then get back? Not going to happen. So they came up with all these ideas and they brought in von Braun, who winds up, you know, making the V2 rocket and who winds up heading NASA, the scientist von Braun. He thinks he has an idea. Then another scientist thinks they have an idea. The bottom line is they never were able to get away to. to somehow get these planes over there to drop bombs. And actually, what a Coinkie Deak, one of the military plans that they found later on had one of the dates for the possible bombing of New York City

was September 11th. That was our first 9-11. First 9-11. September 11th, 1941 or 1942, young Adolf wanted to bomb New York City. Now, they started to get, they started to think outside the box. They said, what about a sea plane? What if we can just have a seaplane come over there and it'll bomb and then can land in the ocean

and it'll get picked up by submarine. You can transfer now by seaplane. Is it the same thing as... Were they Greeks? Yes. Yes. That's what... Yeah. And then the seaplane could only land in Athens. So...

14. So they wanted to... It was called the America Bomber Project and the Luftwaffe, which is their air force. By the way, Luftwaffe is a nice name. I want to get merchants that's luf off. Yeah. It is a nice thing.

It's a fun name. Yeah, yeah. They wanted to build this bomber with enough range to cross the Atlantic, strike New York or D.C. And return to Europe. The designs included the modified junkers Jew 390. So they called it the junkers Jew. Which is like their bunker buster. They just called it the junker Jew.

And that's the real name of it. That's the real name. The Messerschmitt 264. But none of these planes became operational due to resource shortages and allied air superiority. So that's the thing. That's the thing with war Sorry It's all right

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And who's got a non-bluechew piece And we prefer a bluechew piece Yeah we run intelligence on that We know if you have a Rock Hard piece that wasn't made in America. Yeah. Blue Chew was made in America.

Tablets made in the USA. We know that you've got freedom boners, red white and blue cocks. You know when you lay it down there talking about how it gets up. We want you to have that third legacy. Nothing makes you more of a legend than a little blue chew. Sometimes I just take them when I'm not, you know? I just like to pop them. Pop it back.

I said to do it when I'm working out. Yeah, listen, if you play basketball, you know what I mean? You got to stay half chubbed. Right. Pop a blue chew just so you're impressive in the locker room. It's just, dude. There's many, many reasons why people take a chew. Yeah.

So what you can do right now is... You've got a special deal for them. Yeah, we do. As always, get your first month of Blue Chew free. Just use the promo code hyenas at checkout and pay $5 for shipping. That's it. Join Blue Chew's mission to upgrade humanity, one thrust at a time. Head to bluechew.com for details and safety info.

And thanks to Blue Chew for sponsoring the history. Hyenas, as always. Because I got a new product for you. Yeah? hungry root tell me all about it babe because you said you don't like going grocery shopping you said it gets boring it gets annoying you start to eat everything in the supermarket sometimes you get arrested because you're just eating all the fruit and you can't do that yeah and also i make a lot of bad choices and i need somebody to help me make better choices so hunger root is like having your own personal

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So they're watching out for you, hon. Yeah, so just let them do it. Let them come up with your grocery alternatives for the things you want. They'll give you something that's cute and good, but it'll be a little healthier. Yeah. And even, you know, in my family, Jazz is always tired of being like, I've got to figure out these kids snacks. What the hell do they want?

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code hyenas to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for a lifehunger root.com slash hyenas code hiatus. Look, so they couldn't, they just, the kids just could not figure it out with the air or rocket. So then they said, what about submarines? And they got these U-boats.

And Cuzz, did you know that a German-Nazi U-boat got off to the coast of Long Island? Oh, yeah. They were, you know, a lot of times they would get their U-boats like right only a, Like, they could see the city lights. They'd go right up on New York a lot. New York.

And, you know, the kids, you're far away from headquarters. Right. You know, once you see those city lights and you start hearing, if you could make it here, you could make it anywhere. Yeah. Kids just started having to change your heart. That's the problem. That's what Hitler didn't understand because Hitler had never himself been to the USA.

He'd never been to New York City. If the kid took one trip to New York City, it could have maybe stopped this whole thing. Yeah. The problem was he was just, all he was doing was building it off photos and propaganda. He never actually set two feet in the boroughs. No. He never went on a cyclone. No.

If the kid went to Coney Island, he got himself at Nathan's Frankfurter. Yeah. It might have all changed because he would have been an emigrant. He would have put his feet swiftly and sternly and Ridgewood. Yeah. And got himself a fucking Joe and Johns. Oh, my God, slice. Or what if he would have just had a bagel?

He would have said, you know what? The Jewish kids know how to make bagel? instead of oil the bagels. Yeah, come on. It's exactly right. He would have just said, I mean, in everything bag with a little smear? I mean, these people are not that bad. You don't understand.

You don't understand. A lot of times it's because people just, they can't make it in New York or they've never been to New York. Yeah. Then they just turn sour. That's what it is. And now, here's the issue is that. Plus, he could have went to all the gay clubs he wanted in the village and got his fucking nuts stomped on.

He got it out. Nobody would have jumped them. any blonde hair, blue-eyed hoddies we have in New York? Yeah, you know how many fucking trannies do we're in the village that would have stuffed his mouth full of fucking... They would have loved it. And so the kid just never came. He never really got outside Germany.

So, but these U-boats, you know that Nazis actually landed. They did land in Amundacid right by the Hamptons. They got onto the beach. Yeah. Okay, four or five of these guys got onto the beach. They actually got stopped. It was actually eight but four in New York. or New York, eight, four more in Florida.

Oh, I didn't realize they went down to Florida. Which is ironic because they were Germans and they basically did the fucking snowbird invasion. Yeah. They went to New York and they went to Florida. They took the same route as fucking elderly Jews. Well, I was going to say they knew. They said, where are the points of entry for the Jews in New York? It's New York or Florida.

That's where they're coming in and out of. Yeah. So they, but they, what I don't love is that there was a U.S. Coast Guard member that caught the Nazis coming onto the beach and all he did they bribed him with 260 bucks well it's actually three and they shortchanged him at 260 and the kid took 260 why was that kid not given the death penalty for letting these Nazis in because 160 bones the kid did it strategically right well we don't know that that's what he says but yeah what chris is referring to the only problem is that this operation didn't have any legs right didn't work and it didn't have legs pun intended you want to know

why tell me it was called operation postorius yes So there's a lot of legs to complete. Yeah. Yeah. If they wanted to be successful, they needed legs. They just didn't have legs. So it was called Operation Pistorius. And who absolutely killed his girlfriend.

He absolutely killed his girlfriend. He said it was an intruder, but the kid killed his girlfriend. Yeah, I think he just, yeah. He killed his girlfriend and then he put his legs on and ran away. That's what he did. So Operation Pistorius was this German plan to get some saboteurs up. on to land and have them blow shit up, attack Jewish businesses just to sow some panic and kill some infrastructure.

It was German terrorism. German terrorism. So they, uh, and these dude, these U-boats would, were like sometimes a couple miles off the coast and they'd pop their little head up and take a look at, like I said, the skyline. And they were, they were very close. So, and the United States knew about it. So they would like dim their lights and stuff like that because they knew that the submarines were there but so what they did late at night in june that was the problem like we said they they show up on

the shores of amagasset in florida amygasset which if amygasset is the hamptons it's the beginning of the hamptons yeah yeah it's it's where the hamptons are um and they came up there and they landed in the middle of the night and there was a coast guard guy who in who saw them and pulled them over and uh they tried to lie or whatever and then they just tried to bribe them they said we'll give you 300 bucks, right, and they ended up shortchanging him with 260, and he went back to his Coast Guard headquarters and told, you say, hey, we got some German spies that are coming because he probably felt outnumbered. He probably did it because he was like, I don't want to get killed here. Right. Right. There was four of them. I don't know why he did it. Maybe, or maybe

the kid was just going to take the bribe and just had a change of heart. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Or maybe he got, or maybe he thought, you know what, these guys, I asked for 300, they gave me 260. They could suck my ass. They could suck my ass. Now, Mad. Well, you know, which is ironic because these were German kids and what they did was they exactly. That's what it. 40 bucks. 40 bucks. So it's interesting how we all are the same. Yeah. The enemy that you hate is within you. Yeah. You're there to destroy Jewish businesses. But right there, you're fucking acted like what. Yeah, just running Jewish business. Which is great. They're the best business people. And it's what it is. But it's interesting that they let these guys in. And now,

Now the FBI gets alerted with the head honcho Jay Edgar Hoover is running around in his panty hose looking for these Nazis. This is true, looking for the Nazis in his host, which is one of my favorite things in history to just sit, just picture Jay Edgar Hoover pacing in his penthouse or wherever he's staying at a hotel. He's just pacing in his pumps and his fishnet and he's just seething about Martin Luther King. It's just one of the funniest visuals you can have. That's just on the phone going like, we've got to do something about this guy. He's a revolutionary. and he's just in six-inch stilettos. Well, he's in six-inchilettos with fishnets on here looking for German Nazis.

So that's just funny to think about, but that is the truth. That's the truth. They couldn't find them. And what happens is the leader, one of the saboteurs, George Dash was his name. He just decided they would have actually not been found because they, this is before cameras and all that. They were infiltrated into New York society. John Dash, though, just decided to betray the mission.

And he contacted the FBI himself and revealed the place. plot in exchange for leniency. Well, well, you're leaving out a bunch of details. Tell me. Okay. So there was four in Long Island, four in Florida. So Dash, Burger, and two others, right? They knew that they had been made, right, because of this Coast Guard guy. But then the parts that you left out is they swam up on the shore of Long Island, right? And if you've never been to Long Island in the summer, it is gorgeous.

Oh, God. Gorgeous. I mean, the only negative there is ticks. Yeah. It's the only problem is you've got to worry about ticks. So then the sun came up And they're sitting there on the beach And they stayed for a little while

And they sun bathed a little bit And then they walked into town And they were like Wow this is fucking Cahew They went and they got themselves a smoothie Yeah And they went to Tim Dillon's pool party

And they said whoa Yeah they went whoa And then they went to the white party cause And they fucking Had an orgy with P-Dinny Yeah And you know And then they made

Dude if you made a montage To one It was an innocent people when you just covered in baby oil, suck and ditty's cock. Because you don't want to send your spies to fucking the Hamptons. No, that was a long spot.

They're going to have a change of heart immediately because it's the cutest spot in summer. It really is. It is. It was just too cute. So what they did is they hopped on a train and Burger and Dash went to a New York City. Right.

That's a place they'd never seen your bed. And they were probably just sticking around going, wow, wow, look at this. They probably walked through the village. They're like, wow. They probably got a slice. It's okay to be gay here? Yeah, wow, look at all my God, the hoarding hands, the guys.

Wow, oh my God, an Italian eyes, they had all this money. This is Maxen Stupid. They were Maxen Stubin's, because if we made a video... Yeah, yeah, it was Maxin Stubin's, and if you made a video montage of them, they'd be like fucking doing the same thing we do with smoothies. Yeah. They'd go get a slice. They had a cute fucking day.

They went sightseeing. Yeah. They looked at the Empire's daypinning and said, like, look. Yeah. We can, like, if we drop dime and tells them, they'll treat us like heroes. And then we'll stay, they'll give us a parade, and then we can be free here. Yeah. Because imagine going from Heidelberg to NYC?

Yeah. Talk about an upgrade. They would love it. They have this thing called Mamosa. And then they went to like a five-star hotel. Oh, yeah. All that loot. So they probably stayed at the fucking, I don't know, the four seasons or something.

Yeah. And they were getting room service? Yeah. And they were like, cuss fuck this. Yeah. We're staying. Yeah. So they went and they dropped dime.

And he went and he just spilled the beans. Dash went. And him and Burger had. agreement like let's just give this whole shit up they had a change of heart and they gave up the other four they said who cares about them is for me anew to execute some but we're going to fucking party yes and so but it didn't work out that way unfortunately it didn't work out so they dropped dime and j edgar hoover took all the credit yeah it's just a scumback thing to do but also i think there's a nice little cute um memorial for the coast guard kid that uh in amaganza

really yeah there's a little memorial that says like this kid did this where the spot where they found him. Yeah, where they found, where he spotted them. Where he spotted them, yeah. Yeah. So they, we should just go throw 300 bones on it right now. Yeah, we should throw 300 bones on it. Yeah.

Yeah. Or 260. Yeah. Or no, give him 40 bucks because the kid asked for three. Yeah. Yeah. Which was a light bribe. It was a light bribe.

And I, but you got to do put, because at first I got angry thinking about this kid doing that. But then I was like, if I was outnumbered by three or four Germans, either I'm going to just get the money or I'm getting on the knees and trying to suck off for freedom like Paul Revere. Because that's what Paul Revere did too. He got caught by the British soul. soldiers, and then they just let them go.

So the only way you could get through that is if you suck it. Yeah. Yeah. So six of these eight guys ended up getting the fucking chair. Yeah. Yeah, they got the chair. Which that's, if you're going to capital punishment, you don't want to get the chair. No.

And those other four guys came up on Florida. I don't know where exactly in Florida, but they also get the chair? I mean, they got the chair, but those guys also probably had a change of heart as soon as they showed up in Florida. You should have sent them like, I don't know, show up in Oregon coast or maybe name or Delaware Delaware or something. Or to Delaware. Go to Delaware. Because most of the 13 colonies are absolutely cute except Delaware. Yeah. Or I don't know. You can't put them in Charleston because that would be too cute.

I mean, Delaware is cute too. They have cute beaches there. But I mean, most of Delaware is just no, thank you. Yeah. Just, I don't know. The shores of Georgia or maybe the shores of Newark. Yeah. They could have popped out in Elizabeth, New Jersey. Oh, yeah. It's really hard to keep thinking that you're the superior people in the superior race if you show up in NYC. Yeah, I mean, you know, and it's just like you would want to, if you show up in NYC or Florida, it's tough. But, I mean, you're getting pulled down on like the Jersey waters by like fireman Ed, the Jets fan. You might be like, you know what? I want to kid you all.

Yes. Yeah, you would have stuck to your mission if that happened. But unfortunately, six of them got the chair and then Burger and Dash, unfortunately, they just got life in prison. Oh, they didn't get sent back to Germany? No, first they got life in prison, but then, and Dash was upset. He was like, what's the fuck? He was like the guy at the end of Inglary's Bastards who was like, I'm giving myself up. And then they just carved the swastick.

It didn't go the way he thought it was going to go. Just what it is. But eventually, I think Truman let him go and he was able to go back to Germany. But he wasn't really welcomed as a hero there. They didn't kill him in Germany? No, they didn't. He lived out his life in obscurity. He wrote some book that nobody read and nobody cared about him and he was a nobody.

Yeah, unfortunately. Unfortunately, it didn't really work out. They didn't get to enjoy nothing. Yeah. And look, this case, this was obviously made. embarrassment for Germany because the United States used it as propaganda. They said, we caught them, we did this, look at this, how awful this is, and it set a major legal precedent where it upheld the use of military tribunals for unlawful enemy combat. So that

meant that, you know, we basically said you trying to spy in our country, you're going to get killed. And that still holds up to this day. You get caught spying in the United States. You could get murked. You could. You could. Possible. Yeah. Unless, you know, Russia takes you in their embassy or whatever. Yeah, or unless you're from Israel and then you can do whatever you want, be pedophile. It doesn't matter. You just get extradited back to Israel and then you just go have fun and tell Lvivie. Yeah, I mean, that's just all you got to do is look, if you are trying a message a 14 year old girl and solicit. This is a real story. Yeah. What you want to do when the people come up is you want to go, hello, I'm from Israel. And they go, all right, you know what?

We're just going to send you back and you're going to be fine. Yeah. Because that's just what happened. Yeah. Yeah. And the Trump administration made it happen. So I just want to know what. they have on that guy. Yeah, it's just what it is. It got something on that guy. Now, because also through our research, one thing I learned is that I always knew about Japanese internment camps. I always knew that Japan was the enemy during World War II, so they kind of had to round up Japanese because they didn't want any sabotage or spies. But did you know they also did it to Germans? I didn't know that. This is something a lot of people know, no, like about 120,000 Japanese were put into camps. Right. Right. And about 11,000 Germans. Yeah.

A lot of nationals, a lot of German nationals, but also citizens and whole families were put into camps. Camps. Now, it wasn't so bad for... In Texas, too, is Crystal City Texas. Texas, New Mexico, stuff that we would not like. Yeah, I mean, they didn't even have the fucking mothership. Do you think that could do anything? Do you think that's why I don't like, like, because I don't really like the southwestern landscape? Do you think that's probably why?

Do you think my ancestors were put in one of these German camps and it's a memory that's getting passed down from you? Do you think my mom's, do you think my grandmother was put in one of those camps? It's very possible. Because I really dislike the southwestern United States landscape. Well, I think more likely is that your grandmother supported the Nazis, so she was a prime target for the FBI to go into that camp. It's just what it is. So I think that's probably why. Well, I think if I would have been one of the 11,000, had I been a young man in the 40s, I think they would have just looked at me and said, he's going in.

Well, they would have looked at your little box of, you know, memorabilia, and they would have seen a ticket to the garden. Yeah. For the Nazi rally, yeah. And they would have just thrown you in there. Make no mistake, there was about thousands of kids in there that looked just like you doing this. Doing that at the garden. The fact you put that. And that's why you wanted to do the garden is you wanted to get back into glory.

That's the real truth is I am doing the theater at Madison Square Garden, September 11th, just a couple of weeks away. And I really want to do the big one, the arena, because I was just for goof. I was just going to have that big picture of George Washington that the Nazis had during their rally. I was just going to have that as my backdrop. And if you know, you know. And unfortunately, the plans got spoiled. I didn't sell enough ticky, so we moved it to the basement. But it's not your fault.

It's just Nazis aren't that popular yet. Yet. But if Candice Owens and Jake Shields could say anything about it, you're on your way back. Yeah, we're on our way back in. And I just think that, yeah, the government would have seen that I had a ticket to the garden. And also just they would have said, you know, we only have one or two people who are spending thousands of dollars a month on linset tarts. And he's one of them. so that

we got to just get that kid out of here and he can have all the Lindsay he wants but he's got to have him behind this gate where we know where he's doing yeah and here's the thing about the 11,000 the 120,000 Japanese got a formal apology and they got reparations

I think in 1988 they all got reparations what were the reparations do they all just get a hundred dollar gift cards to Habachi restaurants they just gave him a bunch of money for Ari Rangs ladder 14

yeah Yeah, they got a free companion certificate to Benny Hannes. It's what it is. They actually only got 20 grand. Total? Per person. Per family or person, they got 20 grand. I think it was 20 grand each dude.

Wow. Can't do much with 20 grand. Not enough. Yeah, but the Germans got nada. The Germans got nada. Nine. There was this push to recognize what they did. I mean...

I might bring it back. What, for the Germans? The push to bring back what we did. Yeah. Well, I mean, back then, the positives. Yeah, I mean, you got to understand like, you know, back then, you know, it was a, it was a little different back then. Right. America sprang into action. Right. Nowadays, I don't think they'd be able to do this. If something happens with China, we wouldn't, first of all, the Chinese are trickier because they live underground and can go invisible. So that's tough to round them up. Yeah, you can't really get them. Yeah. You can't really get to a mosquito or, you know, if we get into a fight with Israel, it's tough to find them if they're in your shoes. That's what I think. And actually, this is a real thing that was said. I had a nice little pool party where. I invited some of my neighbors that I used to live next to in Bay Ridge, and there was a nice conversation that we were having in the pool while the kids are having a good time swimming around in a lantern bug, which we've been told by the news to kill. That's an insect that you have to kill. They're so colorful, though. They're colorful and beautiful. And one of them landed

and got killed. And the guy's daughter was like, Daddy, why did you kill that one? He was like, that's one of them lantern bugs I told you about. And then she was like, oh, we have to kill those, right? And he goes, yeah. And then he turns to me with a beach ball and he says, I really, I really. think they got um those are from the chinese he goes i swear to god he goes he thinks that he was like i think the government's telling us to kill those because i think china let them loose in our country and either they got listening devices in them or there's just something from china that's going to kill our plants and it's some type of sabotage and he really believed that yeah that those lantern bugs are from the chinese and he may actually be right he may actually even take a step further

and say not only are they from the chinese but those are actual chinese he's not far off because I think they do originate from Asia, right? Can you look that up? I think they are Asian and they're a big pest. Because the government, and the reason why I think we're being told to kill those is because that is some type of foreign invasion. That didn't just naturally come out of nowhere. No, if you don't think those are some type of Asian spying devices, you've got another thing coming.

Yeah, I mean, look at that, the spotted lantern fly. Yeah, they're actually cute when they spread their... Yeah, they look like a little water model. I don't want to kill them. But they are from Asia and they're a significant pest. So, I mean, you tell me. Right. I mean, they're the fentanyl of insects.

Yeah. I mean, is it just a coincidence that we got all this fentanyl? We got all, now they're trying lantern flies. They try COVID. I mean, they're going to try everything. They're going to try it all. They tried the MSG for a while. Remember, it was the MSG and the food to kill us.

They're a little creative. They're trying to get a little creative, but, you know, I do think, I do think that the Chinese now and, you know, it's not like the Nazis, though. The Nazis, I mean, dude, if they would have gotten into New York, I would, it just, I just, I take it very, personal because it would have the conflict within my family would have been tough if the nazis got here now and now what do you do yeah you know like what what do you do it's like when the united states plays germany in soccer well it's tough most germans uh most german immigrants and there was a lot millions and millions and millions in the united states yeah my family were a few of them yeah most of them sided with the u.s most of them fought in the you know the guys fought in the army they were

against germany or whatever but yeah there was a i think it was about 25,000 thousand like Nazis. There was a group they were called the Bon or Bomb or who were the guys who sold out the Nazis. It was they were pretty much They were anti-Nazis.

No, they were Nazis. But there was only like 25,000 of them. Enough to sell out the garden. Which shows you just need a following. That's all you need. That's all you need. Well, you know what? Yeah, the America first move

and during World War II refers to a powerful isolationist sentiment in the U.S. that opposed American involvement in the war before the attack on Pearl Harbor because why would you want to, you got to think about it, Put yourself in today's world, like the war happening in Ukraine.

Like if, yeah, it's just what it is. It's just what they do. What did your ancestors really do all day? Beyond names, what were their lives like? With Ancestry's global historical records, you can discover incredible stories about how your ancestors lived and worked. And for a limited time, you can explore select occupation records for free. Imagine finding your great-grandfather's RCMP records

or discovering your ancestors' name in the UK and Ireland Nursing Register. Don't miss out. Free access ends August 24th. Visit Ancestry.ca for more details. Terms apply. So the group was called the Bund Group. Yeah. German-American Buns. And they were, they're the ones that sold out the garden. Yep. And they did what I couldn't.

They did what you couldn't. It was, but, you know, it's never, it's never too late to bring it back. I just got to bring it back. And here's the, here's the truth is that we would have never, you got to think, about the United States, why would they want to get involved in a war that was happening over there? Like I said, it'd be like, put yourself in present day, even though it's horrible what's happening in Ukraine, you're sitting in, you know, Ohio, you're like, I don't want to go to war for that. I don't want to, so that's what World War II was. We didn't really

get involved until Pearl Harbor made us get involved. And we also didn't declare war on Germany. They declared war on us. Yeah, yeah. So we did not pick a fight with Hitler. He picked a fight with us. And the Japanese is the same thing. They bombed us. They bombed us. Which we've done episodes on before we could, you know, look back, you know, our episode. Which was a big mistake. Big mistake. Big mistake. Listen back to one of our old episodes about Pearl Harbor, about why the United States

attacked us. And they just made a big mistake. It was a big, big, big mistake. It was a big, big, big, bento box. So, yeah, it's what it is. Yeah, so their effort to try to infiltrate the United States. States didn't work. And we told you what your history teacher won't tell you. It's because they picked the wrong spot to drop their saboteurs. Yes. And you just, you're not going to

destroy New York City. If you take one peek at that skyline, you're going to get inspired. Yeah. You're going to throw on Alicia Keys and you're going to say, you know what? I'm ditching this place and I'm going to try to make it. Yeah. Because a lot of these German kids were just frustrated singers and actors and gay kids. Right. And this is the place to be if you're creative. To be, to be, to be, I mean, If any of these Nazis would have just sat down and watched Gypsy with Tim Dillon, they would have turned their minds around like we did. Okay. Do you think the two guys, what were their name is again?

Do you think they went and caught a Broadway play before they hit that hotel? They had a meeting. They might have just had a day. Yeah, they might have had just had a day. Just went into savings. Matt had just had a day. Yeah. Because I don't think they just came up with that opinion that they were going to drop dime on the whole operation without having a fucking New York City day.

Do you think that there's video of them just. skipping down the street. I think if you made a montage of it, it would look like Leverd and Shirley. Yeah. They would hit, they probably hit Ellis Island. Yves. They probably got an Italian ice. Yeah. They probably skipped around Soho a little bit. They loved it. Yeah. They probably went and walked over the Brooklyn Bridge, which we've done. Yeah, which we've done. They probably just looked like a day in the life of the history hyenas. Taking a stroll. Yeah. There's no way you're going to want to hurt New York after you spend a nice cute day. Yeah. I mean, Hitler had to go.

Yeah. The guy just had to go and he wound up in Argentina living out of the States. Supposedly, allegedly. That's what they say because make absolutely no mistake. It always goes back to Latinos. Yes. And we have one. On the camera, Jasmine is here up behind the camera.

So just know that the pressure is odd. She's here just looking at me. She's dressed up. She's dressed up like what was like legally blonde. You know, what she's Puerto Rico. She's dressed up like. Legally brunette. You want to say anything?

Okay, yeah, but she is here, and it's just what it is. We've invited her into the History Hyena's Studio, and now you better just read these fucking names. Because that was a good episode. As always, at the end of every episode, we go to patreon.com slash history hyenas, and we read out the newest members of the matriarchy. Funniest name wins.

That's all you got to know. Okay, welcome to the matriarchy, Cameron McLean, Vail on. Then we got Pilon, D.L. Dalcis, 1988. Then we got playing can jam with the frisbee from Janice's head. Good one.

Zachary Lee. Then we got played with a dirty frisbee. Bow my fingers smell like Epstein's neck. Oh, play with the dirty frisbee. Now my fingers smell like Epstein's neck. He had a typo. So unfortunately you type, you know. Yeah, that would you can't put that.

You were a victim of a bad type. Yeah, it was your fault. Your fault, not mine. Then we got would put my real name, but I'm a history teacher and base my lessons off this. That's a Drexler That's a good one Then we got

Not So Planned Parenthood Okay That's a chicken finger That's very good Then we got Christian Ramirez Lomel Nick Vastucci James Jack Nick Vistucci?

Yeah you got a sauce monkey award Black Hawk down my throat What about a list Okay Jazz even laughed at that one Okay Alex Schwerch Drake

Drake Roberts Then we got Call Me Khan Because Jengis shot glue In my great great great grandmother It's a true story. It's a Drexler.

Most of us have Genghis Khan DNA. It's just what it is. Although me, no, that would be Central Asian DNA, and I got none of that. And it's a great day when I learned that. Yep. Yeah. Mike, Brandon Scarborough. Then we got playing fetch with frisbees by throwing $3 bills in the oven.

It's what it is. Okay, walked in. What I mean? So creative. So creative. Yep. Yeah. It's not.

Okay. Can't do it. We can't do it. It's not right. That was not right. But shout out for the creativity. Samantha Franker. Hannah Kung Fu Lu

Noi Akuna Fielder Orion Jay then we got Nimi in Minneapolis Oh shit I think that's a A Chauvin joke Neamy and Minneapolis Big time And I walked into one

That I caught myself walking into one You know what just happened right there Yeah that was just a goal that got through You're not a good goal I'm not a good goalie goalie head Yeah you don't But did you did you just get them by you David Stanton

Dan Edsel then we got Yani popping my B-hole. Ron Gambrino, David Zorowski, Dustin Maynard, then we got fucked 94 dudes in Minneapolis, call me Jerry Craig. I don't get it. Jeffrey Jenny Craig, man.

Jerry Craig? Okay. Best in show winner, my big gay dick. And we got a far from jazz. Just for the funny fact. Andrew Callio, Peter Hill. Luke got his glue gun goo on mom, Freudian bomb. Okay. It's just a Yeah, therapy.

Okay. Loki, Jackie, Bill Buzz and Call, profit, Mark DeSalvo, Bradley Glacier, Kenny Curvecock, Johnny Guershow, Spell Easy, 41, gold gluer, quif Hernandez. Quif Hernandez, on its own, would have been nice. And gold glover, instead he put gold gluer. Yeah. Quef Hernandez, that's not bad. None of these are blowing us away, though. No, but that was really good.

I would have liked it just quief Hernandez. Then it would have gotten himself on the list? Yeah, if you're a New York kid, you know, that was a pun on. Keith Hernandez. Legendary mess. First basement. Cokehead. Good first basement.

I'm going to Drexler that. Right. Okay. It's good, though. Drexler. Then we got William Cullen. Then we got cholesterol. Chris stole my child's bacon egg and cheese.

Okay. It's probably true. Yeah. way song she ain't shit jazz is laughing at that jazz it's great creative i mean listen the walked into ones are some of our most creative ones we just can't do that can't acknowledge it

no because we acknowledge civil rights yeah Brian Morhead Evan Hall Logan courtland phys ed mom donnie squirts his glue gun on my bed okay endo gentry Yacht and Yill cleaned off my grill cheap labor from across the border that's a great one yeah that's a great one

yeah I'm gonna Put that on the list. Okay. Yeah, that's a great one. Okay. Yeah. That's what it is. That's a good one. Then we got, if I make the list, I'll be a credit at helium.

It'll be a credit at him. I guess he's a comic. If I make the list, it'll be a credit at helium. I guess he's a kid from Philly. Yeah. All right. Pablo Zuniga. Then we got, Pablo Zuniga.

I don't think it's any. I think that's his last name. Z-U-N-I-G-A. Or I could have walked into what. Or his name is just a walked into it. Yeah, it's just what he might have just been born that way. It's close. and then we got his Malacanus

and then he just wrote a whole bunch of stuff in Greek letters. Got it. Jesse Tristan Thackler Oven O'Daro. Napoleon Bonaparte aka Sergeant Squeak Sniffer Steven Silwiki Matthew Yeager Fred Lockamee Iob Enyu

Spencer Elman Jack Himhoff Scoots Magoots Sam Warren Tevin Clay Dubia wants the war because to score more oil paints I don't know Walker Brady Goof Juice

Carson Bridget Ryan Joseph Lowe Russo Pippa Peece of Ravioli please Okay Anthony Michael Dor Janus is two

centimeters away From becoming Cyclops We know that he actually He's fully That's just more of a fact Yeah Reggie Akins

Yannis's Stash of Stockings Pallelis Put him on this Yeah So he's that stash That you had Your Kid

Then we got Homies Call me tongue dart because I tend to crack the back door. Ooh, that's borderline. Okay. That's the Drexler. Any other day, we just got some goodies.

Jamie Bitts, $3. Habilis, Landon Pellets, Eric Adams' middle name, King Arthur, Chain, wait, King Arthur's mail Sir Ranserot. Ways on Sheeer. Lot of 14.

I mean, can't do it. Can't do it, but it is fun, and it got to laugh on camera and off camera. Then we got greetings from Father Bill's basement. Right. Okay. Matthew Fikowski, William Schwettman, Brian Young, Rich Hoffman, Brennan Kelly, salt and velourri chips. Okay, I don't get it. Oh, yeah, they got you good.

Yeah, it got you good. Salt and Villaroy chips. Salt and vinegar. They got you good. I mean, they're getting so creative. Now what, but we can't do it. Of course we can't do it. But, I mean, you've got to applaud the creativity.

Okay. Wilson, Iwatz, Cameron Fick, Hunter Howard, Jacob Martin, kimchi with the tripod, it's what it is. The Korean kid. Yeah. Pre-teen bean, licked clean by Epstein. Put them on the list. Hey, son, she ain't.

Chad, stop laughing at that. Then we got all balls, no dick. Put them on the list. Okay, there we go. We got back. Now it's heating up. Jude Viator, Reaper of Mars, Camden English. Bailey W. Jacob Ellarbeck,

Sarah Burke, Jordan Littlefield, Dennis Cirrus, Keith Cooney, Bobby Kelly's gastric sleeve, Dmitri Gobernoff, Little Pecker, Big Balls, okay? There is, better one right before you. Yeah, Alex Marias,

Jay with the G, it's what it is because just don't call me gay. Yessica. Chrissy D. Yanni P. Father B. Made me P. G.G. Kevin Tripp. $10 homie here.

garbage to accidentally subscribe to the wrong podcast? No, he'd say, yeah, we're happy to have you. Happy to have you. Yeah, he's a, that's a, are you garbage fan? Greenpoint 69, Melissa Bird, Thomas Weissert, and then last but not least, everyone keeps asking when my baby is Jew, not on my watch, pal. I don't get it. When my baby is due? When my baby is Jew, they said. Not on my watch, pal. I don't know what that means. I don't know. Sorry. Yeah. Okay. That's what you call a went for it. Went for it. Didn't hit. Here we go. Here's the Okay. Now, Jess, do you want to get involved in picking the name?

Yeah. Because you're here as a guest. Okay, I'm just going to look over and see if you laugh or not. Okay. Black Hawk down my throat. That's got to stay around. Yeah, that's sticking around. Okay, so we'll circle that.

Yock and Yill cleaned off my grill, cheap labor from across the border. Yeah. It's got to stick around. And she's laughing, and she's laughing despite there as being two of her cousin's names. Then we got to. Yannis' stash of stockings. She likes that. It's another good one.

I'm telling you, it was a light list, but a tough one. Pre-teen being licked clean by Epstein. We're going to Drexer that. Drexer because we've had a lot of Epstein, but it is good. It's good rhyme scheme. And then all balls no dick. That's a great one. Jesse likes that one.

You like that one to stay? Yeah, I'm in a silly mood. That's a goodie. That's a good silly one. We got four. This is basically like the semifinals. Right. We got four.

So here's the four. let me read them out. All balls no dick, Yannis' stash of stockings, Yacht and Yil cleaned off my grill, cheap labor from across the border, or Black Hawk down my throat. Okay. All right. Let's go one at a time here. Okay. Let's start with the end of the list because I think those are the weaker ones. Again, this is any other day. It's just unfortunate you run the list with some of these. Okay. So the last two are all balls no dick and Janus's stash of stockings. Those are both good. This is going to be tough. We may have to go to a vote on all four of these. Okay. And what are the other ones?

and yale cleaned off my grill cheap labor from across the border or black hawk down my throat wow yeah wow what do we do here with four winners i don't know what which one is you got jasmine who's our guest yaki yoke and yel okay so we keep that one yeah we got to get rid of two we got to get rid of two So I would personally, I would personally, even though they're very, very funny, I would personally get rid of all balls, no dick, only because we've had it before in some type of way. We had it kind of in a similar way on the list. And Janus' stash of stockings, we've also had stocking ones before. I just feel Black Hawk down my throat and Yac and Yac and Yal are unique. But, what do you think?

I'm just going to go ahead and tell you what my choice is. Yeah, what's your choice? Black Hawk down my throat. Oh, wow. Wow. Okay. So we're going to dress through the stock. stockings.

Any other day. And Drex throwing all balls and no dick. We got a direct to those too. Okay, so those are out. Now we've got a runoff. Because now we have one person is picking Black Hawk down my throat and then one person is picking Yonking Hill cleaned off my grilled cheap flavor from across the border. Yeah.

It comes out to you, Yonnie. You know what? We've had a, this is a tough one and I hate to see Black Hawk down my throat. Go away. Go away. because we've had so many gay ones. Right. This is what it comes down to

is you start going like the uniqueness of it. Well, it could be a girl too though. Right. That's the other thing. It doesn't have to be gay. Well, what's your girl? Only because, only because, you know, I support the Latino community.

Yeah. I have to go with Yakin Yolklinged off my grilled cheap labor from across the board. Look, with either one of those, you can't go wrong. You can't go wrong. This is one of those like Federer Nadal situations. Yeah. You know?

It's like depends on the service. who's better. Right, right. So I'm going to just, you know, to honor our guest, I'm going to go with her choice. Okay, so then therefore, there you have it. Congratulations. Yakin Yil, cleaned off my grill, cheap labor from across the border. You can't lose.

Go to history hyenas back.com or history hyenas pod.com to see your name up in lights. You have the PPW, the pseudo penis of the week. Congratulations, you won. Now catch a really great episode where we're continuing on at patreon.com slash history hyenas. It's a wild one. Thank you.