History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - Pep talk on Peptides W/ Tank Sinatra | History Hyenas

Episode Date: April 23, 2026

History Hyenas is back with longtime friend of the show Tank Sinatra, and things get wild quick. The boys dive into the origin of classic Hyenas lingo, breaking down how some of the most iconic phrases were born and why they still hit. They also take a turn into the history of steroids—where it started, how it evolved, and how it became part of modern fitness culture. Tank keeps it real about what he’s currently taking, from TRT to peptides, giving an unfiltered look into his routine. And in true Hyenas fashion, chaos ensues when Tank rips his shirt off mid-episode, leaving Chris struggling to keep it together. It’s unhinged, hilarious, and full of vintage Hyenas energy. #HistoryHyenas #TankSinatra #ComedyPodcast #TRT #Peptides #FitnessCulture #SteroidsHistory #YannisPappas #ChrisDistefano Support our sponsors: Right now, Mizzen & Main is offering our listeners 20% off your first purchase at https://mizzenandmain.com, promo code HYENAS20 Over 2.5 Million Butts Love TUSHY. Get 10% off TUSHY with the code HYENAS at https://hellotushy.com/HYENAS Get 10% off your first month of BlueChew Gold with code HYENAS. https://bluechew.com Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at https://SHOPIFY.COM/hyenas #comedy #Podcast #History Join our Patreon at 👇 https://www.patreon.com/historyhyenas/ Subscribe to the poddy woddy Our YouTube!: https://bit.ly/2ARdDOz HH Clips:https://bit.ly/2YaK2Z8 iTunes: https://apple.co/2UQTHCc Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3fxtsc0 Hyenas Merch!!! https://store.historyhyenaspod.com Follow us Cuz! 🙆🏻‍♂️ Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ 🙆🏼‍♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🐕More Hyenas Website: www.historyhyenasisback.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/historyhyenas/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/HistoryHyenas Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/historyhyenaspod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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All right, because we got a great episode with Tank Sinatra. He takes your shirt off. You're going to want to get horned up for this one. You're going to need to flog your log. I need you to come in with your nuts empty because the kid takes your shirt off. We pinch his nipples. Come see me, Chris D.com. Every Thursday at New York Comedy Club, 6 and 8.30 p.m.

shows New York City working on new material. Check it out. Yeah, see me in West Nyack this weekend, April 24th through the 26th, West Niagara, New York. Then see me in Mayas, Pennsylvania, May 2nd. Atlantic City, June 27th. 27th, East Hampton, July 8th, New Brunswick, New Jersey, July 17th, and 18th. And then the punchline in Philly, August 14th, and 15th, and August 21st to 23rd. I'll be in Austin, Texas, Patreon.com slash history hyenas to join the matriarchy

and listen to our weekly bonus episode. We have a great Patreon up right now. We went wild. What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas. I'm Chris Estefano, aka Chrissy Clemmas. Feene with me as always, Janus Pappas, aka Yanni the Clani. And now we have a very special guest, the man who coined the term Smithtown Water Department.

Shout out Smithtown Water. Mr. Tank Sinatra, everyone. Tank Sinatra. Nobody knows his real name. Is your name, is your real name like Marty? No. What is it? It's Marty.

Yeah. You didn't know that? That was a guess. Yeah. It's not. Marty, right? No. What is it?

George. it's German. George? Yeah. George and Schweizer. Yeah. Tank's a Nazi. He does look,

Germany. I mean, he's... So are we. Yeah. It looks like I just crashed like the beginning of a Nazi, neo-Nazi party.

See, Tank would be an Uber man. Both of you guys. I would have no problem. Yeah. I remember being like... You guys look like Hitler's bodyguards. Twelve, thirteen,

learning about it and being like... Yeah. Like that guy in the airport. Yeah. Getting asked about ice. Yeah, we was like... They're not bother me.

Yeah, it's bothering me. I'm trying to get to my fucking, I'm trying to get to Bahamas, whatever he said. Tank. It's been seven years. I looked it up on my way. Seven years? Seven years?

Because you came on in the first Reich, you came on twice. You came on once with you? In the first Reich? That's what we call the first initiative of hyenas. You said, because you came on, and then you brought on, remember there was the guy, he was like the vegan guy. Oh. He was like a fighter.

James. Wilkins. Where is he now? James Wilkes or Wilkins What the hell is he doing? He's just not in my algorithm Yeah, he's just eating plants Is he still big?

Like a huge, like he was big on socials. Oh, okay, no, it was the game changes documentary that really like put him out there and then a game changers Game changers And then it kind of faded away I remember that episode, you were like a little saucy with that guy And he was getting mad because I said

I asked him if I could nibble on his cauliflower era Does that count as vegetables? And he didn't laugh. Yeah, really? And he got really upset And then you were looking at me like this I said that to you Well I remember I looked over at you

No you weren't there Yes he was he was in the room No he wasn't Yes he was Yeah in the old studio Yeah interesting Yeah yeah I didn't remember originally Where the Smithtown Water thing came

Until you remind me And it happened on the Tank Sinatra episode Yeah That's a big part That's like a big part of Lexicum Yeah Yeah it was the game change We have merch off it

Yeah We should be giving tank Yeah oh yeah Yeah I do it Nick get ready Do you Yeah I thought the second layer was coming off.

It will. He times it layer by layer. The thing is he could wear his body like a shirt. It's still hot. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Oh, Smith Town Water.

Yes. Holy shit. Shout out, Smithtown Water, that. Yeah. Nick, your body looks painted off. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Look at that, Nick. How's your cholesterol now? You got a body that's made for porn. Yeah. Would you do porn? If you had a cock to match. I'm all right. It wouldn't be like, what is this guy doing here?

But I wouldn't be like famous. Dude, think about how terrifying it would be with a guy with a body like that. And he's the same guy except he was wearing a turban like he was a mom come guy. How insanely terrifying would that be? And you just walked around with Mom Donnie. Yeah. And you had a huge beard. That would be sick.

That would be sick, dude. But you got, but Jesus Christ on his chest. Yeah, big time, Jesus Christ. Now, did you work out this morning? No, I didn't. No, no, don't put it back on. I'm actually a little upset because I wanted to get here early and do push-ups or pull-ups on some scaffolding. Right.

I didn't get to. But I'm zero-pump. But it still looks pretty good to me. So that's zero-pump. Is this the most shredded you've been in your life right now? No, I did two bodybuilding shows. And I was like a little bit more. ripped but not not much and I felt like shit right so what is a little bit more ripped what

does that mean like what does that mean to a guy that's fucking shredded yeah like uh you have a little body dysmorphia because I can't see how you could get any more shredded I can no no no when I could climb up to your tits from your belly button I'd like to yeah I could use your abs as a fucking ladder to come and kiss you on the top of the head how much more don't you put that shirt off I got to put it on for a second. You fucking scumbag. You got to... You got to...

You got to... You get a tingle a little bit now? Tingle, I'm rock hard right now. Rock hard. You know, the last time I was here, Chris ruined my life. I don't know. What happened?

I don't remember. We were doing the psychopedia podcast. Yes. RIP. I was about to say, did he sell your house? No. So he, halfway through the episode,

he goes out of nowhere. He goes, hold on a second. You guys split this equally. Like even like the finances are 50-50 and he just went on about how she does all the work. His podcast partner on Taka-O-Peda, she did all the work.

All the work. She like she did researched everything. Oh, you had a podcast. I remember. Right, yeah, yeah. And then so I was just like, how was this 50-50 when she's doing all the work and he's just showing up and being hot? Oh, wow.

I was adding an element of, you know, lightness to it. Right. So dark. You basically called him Van White on the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I was just messing around. That was just doing a bit. He said, you're giving the eye candy 50% of this money?

But it stuck. But it's stuck. It's all right, though. She's doing fine. And I was. So she complained to you after that? No, no, no, no. We never talked about it again, but it was always there.

But you could put it. It was always there. Like in the glass started to like split little by little by little. Yeah. Now, can you tell us what's your regimen? What are we on now? I want to know the peptides. I want to know the anabolic steroids.

What laid out for us? What's the cocktail? Okay. So I've always been big. But you've also been on steroids for 20 years? No. On and off? No, I started, well, wait, how the fuck I want?

15, 15 years? 15 years. 15 years on and off steroids. I've done one cycle. That's it. One cycle. Yeah. Testosterone.

TRT. Primo. Right. To his appetite. Which is Mungaro. Mujaro. So that's what. See, remember I was telling you, a lot of people think, oh, Mungaro's just for big fatties, but look at how ripped he is on Mungaro.

It's a great tool. It's not a crutch. It can't be a crutch. No, it's a great tool. It's a great add-on to somebody who's already doing the right thing. Same thing is when I started testosterone. Like, I had been training naturally for 20 years. And was your testosterone that low? It was, you know what? I didn't get baseline blood work. Right. So I just, I got blood work done and it was shot. It was like 280, something like that. Yeah. What age is this? 30. 33. And the only thing with testosterone is, TRT, if you boys and girls are taking it out there, you got to give blood. Was it once a month? Got to give blood.

You can't do it once a month. The earliest is 56 days for whole blood. So you got to do, so every three months give blood. You got to give blood. Are you going to have a stroke? You got to exercise. You got to eat right and you got to get rid of blood, which by the way, there's a theory that women live longer because they lose blood every month.

So even if you're a man not on testosterone, you need to. to be donate your blood it's actually healthy for you it's great for you you get a whole new pint of blood out of nowhere your body makes it for you interesting are you good at reading lab numbers like could you all you couldn't because we want because nick brought in his his his blood work results and i want to see and it just says you know that um his cholesterol is a little high i'll take a look at it but then he has the free testosterone and those numbers because we it seems to indicate he's a woman yeah so i didn't know that it would be good it is good thing to donate donate blood and look at, if you want to look like Tang Sinatra, just donate your blood.

Yeah. To me. Yeah. Yeah. And then you also get confirmation you don't have AIDS every three months. Yeah. Do you think that is the sale that the celebrities make to the parents of the kids who are desperate enough to sell their children's blood?

Yes. This is good for the many way to clean them out every couple days. Yes. I think so. I wish I had access to baby's blood. It would be fucking great. I have no idea what I'm a little bit. So right now, okay.

Sorry, Nick. Well, unfortunately, it's in special. Spanish because he went to pathmark to get it done. Yeah. Pathmark. So, you imagine going to get your blood done at Pathmark? El pop,

a macho, Nicolas Monroe. Yeah, I grew up. De Niro, two, and three. A pathmark. Well, here's,

the one thing, his cholesterol. His cholesterol is 218, but he's got low, it's not terrible. He's got high, LDLDLs, but he's got also got, he's got low good cholesterol. LDL, yeah.

So you need the high... But he's not that low, he's 39. You need the high HDL. Now, the TSH, TSH, FT4, that, you look at that, right? You like the TSAH number. That's the free testosterone, isn't it? What is it at? It's at 1.97.

I don't know. I don't know if TSA is free testosterone. Yeah, I thought... That might be something. I feel like the T stands for something, and it's something stimulating hormone. Right. Right. Because that's the thing is you can have good testosterone, but if your free testosterone is not right,

then your body can't use the testosterone to where it needs to go. Yeah, you got to do it all. Like my blood work, the doctor said my testosterone wasn't that bad. It was like $6.90. That's good. But my free testosterone was, whatever the number of my free testosterone was, whatever the problem is, it was causing me to be very, very, like basically it was like all your testosterone, your body is just going to your cum.

Everything's going to your sperm and to your cum. that's why you're so fertile. You can make babies like this, but because of that, you then can't get jacked. So we're going to have to turn it off from going to the babies and your nuts will shrink,

but then you'll get jacked. There's something about semen retention. Some people go a little nuts with it, but if you think about how much energy it must take your body to create the potential for life to replenish what you just busted out, like it's not saliva.

It's like everything you would need to create a whole human being, just blast it into the toilet. Do you think Nick and I aren't Jack because we jerk off too much? Who's Nick? That's Nick. Do you jerk off a lot? A little bit. I dabble.

But they say you're supposed to do that to keep the prostrate strong. You want to keep the prostate strong. Well, like, Tank is on. That's propaganda. That's propaganda. Right. So tank is on TRT. So he has very small nuts, right?

Your nuts shrink. Yeah, you get gonadal atrophy. Have you noticed that your nuts are smaller on TRT? Yeah, I'm sure. I was never a big balls guy. Really? You don't know. You look like a guy who had big balls.

Now, when they shrink, the sack stays the same size, though, right? So does it look like a change purse? A change purse. Like, does it look like you carry him? I can show, you know what I mean? I'll get an assessment. Would you pull them out? Not your penis?

Would you just put your nuts out through your zipper for us and put it in this water? I don't know. Do you got a chicken skin hanging out? You get bat wings a lot? It's like any regular sack. Sometimes it's tight, sometimes it's loose. Right. I hate when it's loose.

Now, what, what? I like when it's tight. Because we've been... I want to get a ball lift. You want to get a ball lift? I need one. That'd be funny to get a ball lift. Yeah, because what I got to do when I sleep on my side is I got to pull my sack out from between my fat legs.

Now, Janus looks like shit, right? Yeah. Yon, no, no, no. Yonis is fine, dude. Yo, so I started to interrupt. I... No, go ahead. Go ahead.

I did my reading today from... Oh, yeah. Around the year. with Emmett Fox, April 13th, okay? Right. Tank always sends me his readings. I don't know how you don't believe in God. He reads so much, Tank.

He's very well right man. I'm saying, like, the proverbial eel. Like how many coincidences do you need me? Exactly. So you know what today's is? You know what today's reading is? Tell me. Get back on the beam.

Wow. Sounds like God listens to the history hyenas. Because Tank was the one who sent me the initial thing about being on the beam. And you remember what it was? It was about a balanced beam. No, it's about being in God's light and love and presence. Well, today's most commercial flying is done on a radio beam. So the beam is what they follow while they're flying.

And when you're on the beam, you don't have to worry about asteroids or other planes or whatever. You're just, you're on the beam, so you're safe. Right, right. So when you get off the beam, sometimes you get, you know, some danger. Being a danger zone. Might fly into a mountain or something. Right, yeah, yeah. Trying to take the flight into your own hands,

a.k.a. Take your will back. Right. Might have the problems. Right. And that's what we had said when we brought it in. See, this is, Tank is a huge part of this podcast. Not only Smithtown Water during the first Reich, but in the second Reich, the beam, the being on and off the beam was such a huge part of the show for months and months and tank is the one. And Tank is the one.

In the program? In the program. The program's another one. In the program. I'm on the beam and in the program. Right. You're fucking. You know what used to call that.

Yeah. And you're off the beam and out of the program. You guys used to call that screwed in. That was from my first episode. You called me screwed in. It made me feel so good. You're screwed in because you have your yarmica screwed in tight. Yeah.

You're a good businessman. You're doing even this. Knuckle therapy. This is for your new gym, the pack. The pack, yeah. The pack, which is, which is open and operated by. By the way, I thought that was Joey Camasta. It could be.

Yeah. Yeah. That could be Joey Camasda. I thought that was Joey. And Beto, before he got his hair plugs. Yeah. So fun. So, wait, is that on...

Chris, you look great. Thank you. Franks and Beans. So is this Jim on the island? No, this is fucking a few blocks from here. Yes. Wow. 23rd and between 5th and 6th.

And it's owned by the man who created Rumbleboxing, Noah. Noah Neiman, yeah. Noah Neiman, who's an amazing, jacked, beautiful man. Go follow him on Instagram because he doesn't have a lot of followers, and he should. And he's sensitive. I don't know why that guy doesn't have 3 million followers. He's got like 70,000 followers. My mom has more followers than him, but he puts out good content and he's hot and jacked and ripped.

Noah? Neiman. Noah? Neiman. I've been following him for years. He's a good friend. So he was the founder of Rumble with Andy Stenzler. Right. And he's just, he's, you talk about screwed in. That guy is fucking, I mean, into the culture, into the zeit guys. He's an amazing follow. He knows. Who's he jacked? He's jacked, ripped, shredded. He, is he single?

Yeah. So I'm sure he has mutual female friends. Sure. Sure, he was many female friends. I mean, numerous, numerous. Yes, sorry, mutual. He cleans up big. I mean, that's one of the most handsome kids I've ever seen.

Yeah. And ripped, shredded, and a great businessman and only has, and doesn't have 100,000 followers. And a fun hang. Yeah. And rich. And rich. Rich. So, yeah.

So that, because that big, rumble boxing became big. Huge. It's huge and it's fun. And the pack is very similar, right? The pack is better. But it's still boxing. It's striking, endurance. strength. So the striking is, you know what a Bob is? The punching bag that looks like me.

Yeah, yeah, that looks like a German military. He looks like he's in the fucking Luftwaffe. It's like the punching bag that. Yeah. So you strike that. Oh, that guy. Yeah. But then we teach self-defense. He started it to honor his dog who passed away and to give women essentially a chance on the streets. Like New York City is not getting any safer. Right. 90% of women have no idea how to throw a punch. Right. Right. So that's why you, you know, you hit the guy. Yeah. Because he came at a jaw or eyes or nose or throat.

Here, the video that you sent me of you punching it, I'll send, I'll send to the group right now. Oh, yeah. Because tanks got great, great hand eye, see? Oh, yeah. Yeah, here, we'll send it. We'll throw this up where tanks just shirtless and there was a, this angle, this is me laying on the floor with my tongue out.

Yeah. So, um. Teaching girls how to hit. Yeah. Now, does that, what about that? Is that, does that body need peptides? Does that need peptides there? No, go up, scroll up, Jesse.

What about that? What can the pack do with a man, with a human like that? Human, yeah, yeah. We'll get them in shape. Yeah. I'm using, those are Jesse May's hair extensions. Yeah, that's Yonis's ex-girlfriend. Wait, is that you, Yonis?

That is Yonis Pah. From when? Last week? Maybe 2000. You're not, I figured you'd be covered in hair. No, I'm not that hairy. Oh, I'm fucking nice, right? Yeah, for Greek, I'm not as hairy as you.

think. Now, okay, so what else? So we got trizepidot. What do you think? Because we wanted to talk about anabolic steroid use. We want to talk about peptides. I said, I said, you're the one who taught me, and I'm just following this program now, that really one of the keys to getting jacked is lifting heavy and resting. A lot of people don't rest. They overdo it. They get addicted and they think if they miss a moment in the gym or do one rep wrong, then it's the whole workout's toast. Tank's whole thing. And what he's told me, and it's so true is just move. He's like, you're overthinking. What's the quad exercise. What's the perfect exercise? He's like, just go in and work out. You start working out and the rest will fall. And he's right. And the story I told you was I was

going to work at this restaurant, which was right down the street from a restaurant that I worked at for like five years. It was fine. The whole thing was fine. But certain other waiters were like peeking in and seeing like what was going on. I think this guy particularly was spying. He's Russian. He's Russian. He's Russian. So I come back from the orientation and he's drilling me. with questions. He says he wants to work there. He didn't make it to the orientation. What's the uniform? What's the call time? What's the menu? What's the sidework? What's this? What's that? Was his name James Manard? KGB. Okay. Yeah. And, uh, and I said to him, I go, Mike, you're not going to work there. Like, I know you're not going to work there. You got too many questions.

Right. So just leave it alone. Right. Or go and find out. But I said, I had zero questions. I didn't give a fuck what the uniform was, what time I had to be there. I just wanted to go experience it because it was a really like hot restaurant on the water in Huntington. Right. That's odd that he would ask a lot of questions about restaurant work.

That's why I think he was spying. For sure. For the manager, because he was very close with the manager at this restaurant. But how does that apply to working out? Somebody asking me the same questions

over and over again. Yeah. When it's like, just do it. Just go. Just go and give you, especially at our age, give the body a break. Because you go in,

you destroy the muscle and it's systemic recovery. So if you go in and rip your back apart on Tuesday and then you go do legs on Wednesday, like the body doesn't know where to send the resources, you've got to give it like two, three days in between workouts. So what's your typical workout routine?

People are going to want to know seeing no shirt on where the fans are going to want to know we got a lot of faties listening to this pot. Okay, so I walk a lot. Right. 10,000 steps a day, minimum seven days a week. I don't track it.

I just try and move as much as possible. Because I used to track it I would get nuts about it. If I had 9,500 steps, I'd go downstairs and fucking get on the treadmill. So you do it by time? Do you do it by time? By like instinct, like awareness, just being aware of the fact that, okay, I've been sitting for an hour, I've got to get up and move a little bit. Because the problem is with suburban living is you have to plan, you got to go, so where do you walk when you're in the suburb? My block is not great, my neighborhood is not great for walking because I'm on a court off a main road. So I'll get the address at patreon.com

such history hanging is. I can walk up and down the blocks, but I got a treadmill in the house. So that's what you do most of your walking. Even on a beautiful day, you won't get outside. You'll just walk on the treadmill. Most of the time, yes. I was just about to try and make it seem like I get out there. Like, most of the time, it's just easier to go

downstairs. Will it be on an incline the treadmill? No, it's one of those are salt treadmill, so it's just like curved. Right. So are those the best ones, the assault treadmill? I like them. Because it's self-propelled. And you don't run on it ever, really. You're mostly walking on it. Yeah, but I also have an assault bike.

I love the assault bike, which is part of the pack also. Yes, assault bikes are, I think, the best piece of cardio equipment. Cuzz, Mizin and Maine. I got a couple of those shirts, getting summer ready, getting peptides ready. Mizzen and Maine makes the classic menswear with performance

fabric so you can look sharp and feel great all day long, no compromises, because it also hide some tits. Yeah, you know, when I decided that I want to start dressing like an adult, on certain days I want to dress like an adult, I go to Mizan and Maine and I get beautiful performance fabric dress shirts. Yeah.

And they're just absolutely gorgeous and their pants look refined. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yet they're stretchy. Yeah. They're lightweight moisture wicking, which is big for me because I constantly have swamp ass. Yeah, because you're a leaky Greek. I'm a leaky Greek.

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I think you might. Yeah. You know, a lot of guys are lazy, too. What's great about it is moisture wicking, lightweight, wrinkle resistant. I love that. I don't got to iron it. Yeah, because we're not kids that are going to iron anything. No, and also you can wash it.

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Go to Mizan and May. Ooh, because I got three of these in my house. No lie. Yeah? I save on toilet paper. And most importantly, I power wash my smash bean every single day because you got to get the poop out of the crevices in your starfish. Because now let me ask you this because I'm not a handy guy.

Do I have to hire like a real man to install the tushy or can guys like us even do it? I think your wife will be able to do it. I think your wife will be able to do it no problem. Right. Yeah. It's very easy and user-friendly. Yeah, because I have my tushy sitting next to my toilet seat because I'm scared to put it on. I don't know how to connect it.

I had my wife connect all three of them. It's just what it is. It's very easy. Yeah. It connects your toilet bowl. It's a bidet that washes your back door, your two-hole. You power wash your asshole. Every time.

Yeah. Every time. You save so much on toilet paper. You just, you know, I use the tushy. I swear I got it got, I got three tushies in my. my house. Three at my, and you just power wash your butt. Right.

And then you just take a little piece of toilet paper and just dry it. Dry it. Because it's clean. It's squeaky, clean. You ever power wash your balls? Yes. What I'll do is I'll ride up and let it hit the taint. And that's just for pleasure.

That's just for pleasure. That's fun. So the tushy bidet gives you two and one benefits, reducing irritation and preventing micro tears from with soothing water instead of scratchy toilet paper or damaging wet wipes. Now, this is good for my father because he has anal fissures. Yes. So probably from wiping too hard because he would wipe his ass with a lot of

tickets. Yes, yes. But also, a lot of the times when he was straining for the horse that he's straining going, come on, come on, come on, sometimes that hurts your butt. Yeah, that's what it is. So no more wasting money on something that does an inferior job, cleaning your body, no more clock toilets. Tushy, you make the switch, you save up to 80% less toilet paper. Make going to the bathroom, the most comfortable thing you do all day. For limited time, our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order when you use code hyenas at checkout. That's 10% off your first bidet order at hello tushy.com promo code hyenas. Show us those assholes.

Yeah, let me just say there's no reason not to get a Tushy bidet. It really is awesome. It's so easy to put on your toilet. And then from there on in, you'll have a one, especially from our podcast and what we advocate for, you will have a 100% clean ass daily. It's what it is. So between, obviously the peptides help. But I was in good shape before I became an owner of the pack.

But once I became, I got in and then I started training there. of like, it's, I'm in there once a week and it's changed my entire. You've lost all that, yeah. How are the chicks in there? A lot of girls coming to work out. I don't even pay attention to that. Yeah. No, they're hot.

No, if you're a single guy in New York City and you're not training there, you're a fucking idiot. But even if they're not single, it's nice to just have it around. And I always feel like I work out longer if there's hot chicks. Well, they've studied it. Yeah. doubt. Sure. I mean, you just get stronger. Now, you do that if there's hot guys in there. That's what I do. Yeah, yeah. If I get a hot guy, like, if Tank, you know, like, I

guarantee, I was feeling really, really tired, but once Tank took a shirt up, I could probably have done 100 pushups in a row. Yeah. And just done it. Now, the thing about you is, what's the thing about it. The thing about you is, that's true, though. That's true. And I don't know what that is. The truth. Because you're a straight, manly man. Yeah. But I do know if there were women in the gym, you wouldn't care. I wouldn't care. But if Tank's and untrue's in there and ripped, you'd be looking over at him. want him to make sure that he saw that you were doing a hard workout. Why do you think, why is that?

Why do you think I fluffed my hair today? I came in with my hair as high as it could possibly be because I'm peacocking for tech. I said I went to go pee, but I knew he was going to do the bit where he took a shirt up. So I went in the shower, I went in the bathroom and jerked off because I couldn't be in there fully loaded because I would have come on the screens and Jesse would have to reset. What about this is a business idea after this? What about your fat? Yeah, I'm a fat kid. What about this?

What? How about this idea, right? Like an outside gym, right? So you get all the women or whatever, all the people who want to walk or run or whatever, and we take a bus and we just drop them off in horrible neighborhoods and say, do five miles. Because then you could do interval training. Yeah. You get chaste.

Sure. Get your breath. That's a good way to work out. Yeah. Yeah. I fantasize about launching a service where you get kidnapped and put in like a cage. I love it. Yes.

So you get starved. And then you come out, you're 25, 30 pounds lighter. Right. Your family is devastated. They don't know where you are, but you come back and they're like, you look good. You look good. You shredded. We were sad, but, I mean, it is number.

Yeah. Because I just had the flu and I dropped a few and I'm still fat. Yeah. No, but you look good. I told you you look good, but the jeans you're wearing today are holding on. Are these a little tight? Tom a little tight. Yeah, yeah, see he's a little tight.

He's a little tight at the leg. Yeah, fine. What's the waist? Turn around, let me see? 32, buddy. Wow, that's pretty good. See, I can't get. You can't get.

You can't get. You can't. Wow. I just went down. I'm squeezing into him and I got a stomach. But that's still amazing. You're 32. Yeah.

32's crazy. I'm not 32. 36? No, so I was size 38 waist, which is why I fell in love with you. Yes. I remember that. That's where I was at. Then I was 36.

I'm still very comfortable in the 36, but they're big. 34 is big now. Right. Because I haven't bought new jeans in years. Well, because you, when you started taking the trisepetone, you told me you lost something like 30 pounds. Oh, oh, so I want to tell you about this. Yes. I want to tell you listeners.

I want to tell you. I want to tell us. This is not medical advice, though, right? No, it is. Okay, great. Yeah. So there's a theory or there's some evidence to suggest that when you take a GLP 1, 2, or 3, GLP, GLP, GLP, GL2 is geretal.

GL. G. Reta, true tide. Redda. Whole other level. You're going to take it one day, Reda. Yeah, I'm going to, yeah. That you lose more lean mass than fat and that your bone density plummetes.

So I went for a Dexafit. Dexas scan. Tell us what that is. Dexas scan is when you get, it's really for body fat. So it's like the most accurate body fat reading, except for water, but like they don't exist. You can't find them. It gives you your bone density. It gives you lean mass.

What body fat do you think I am? If I had to guess, just taking the shirt off, now understand that when you took your shirt off, my, you know, vision blurred a little bit. And I almost felt like I was going to pass out. but I would still say you're at, if I had to guess, 9%? 12. 12. Okay.

Which feels... Then I must be at like 1,400. Yeah, what is Janus? A picture with Janus with Jesse May's wig on. What body fat percentage is that? Is that in the high 20s? What is that there? In the 30s for sure.

That's in the 30s, right? Well, first of all, body fat is... That's disgusting to look at. It's actually disgusting. It's another word I like to call disturbing. Well, I mean, you're also wearing a wig. It doesn't help. His girlfriend's hair extensions is what he's wearing so he had to clip those in.

We're just not normal kids. We're not normal kids. We're tilted birds. We're a couple of tilted birds. So I lost 22 pounds of fat from my last scan. And what was the last scan? Like a year ago. And that's when you started a try's appetite.

No, I started to his appetite two years ago. Okay. But I lost 22 pounds of fat and one pound of lean mass. Wow. Which is, I don't even know if you could do that without. the glp like it's just it's it's wild as eric adams said all my haters become my waiters that's what you proved exactly yeah and bone density through the fucking through the roof because your resistance training yeah i guess like like i said it's a good tool it's just a tool that's the thing interesting

that's the thing i've been telling yani about pepies no like no other you still have to work out and eat right you're good and i am going blind but that's right but i'm fucking ripped dude you're gonna be so jacked in that coffin? Oh yeah. Dude, I... Bury me with no shirt on. Well, people online really hate on peptides and they're really so mad at them and discredit them, but I... Oh, gives a fuck. I just think it's like, it seems like it's the new

modern medicine. If you're not open to peptides, like, buy, you're going to die at a normal age. Peptides, if you start them at the right age and you stick with them, you're living to 150. It's just what it is. Yeah. 150? At minimum. I don't know. Because they reverse

aging. The whole the whole thing of why you die is oxidation and your, you know, antioxidants. If your cells oxidized, you get cancer, you're more susceptible. Your bones weaken, your heart weakens. Your body runs out of fuel, basically. And you're in a state of entropy, just like everything. So you're constantly going towards chaos. Towards chaos, right?

Yes. But if you stop that at a reasonable age and even reverse it, why would you die? Right. Like you, you, now I've noticed that one of the... I'm getting on fucking peptide. Dude, you gotta go on fucking pepies. Right now you're on pepperoni tides, you gotta get me peptides. I got you.

Thanks to plug. And also, too, even... Wait, no, no, no, I don't. Oh, sorry. I don't know where to get him. I will find out. Dude, you know, like, like Winstrel, which used to be like the illegal, steroid or whatever, like these clinics now that I get the peptides from, that's, like, open about it,

they sell them online. They sell Winstrel? Yeah, isn't Winstrel's, like, legal now? I don't know. Winstrel's crazy. Really? It's so bad. I take Winstra.

It's Winnie? Do you ever take, what are the steroids you've taken and what, like, what would you, because you're the one that also told me, like steroids aren't as, like we all think from these early studies, steroids give you cancer,

they do this and do that, but actually taken properly, steroids don't do those things. Well, Lyle Alzado died from brain cancer and was on steroids and was grasping for some way to explain this tragedy

that befell him, and he blamed it on steroids, and everyone was just like, oh my God, steroids cause brain cancer. They don't. How could, I don't know, anyway. So I think people, because it seems too good to be true, people just, they talk themselves out

of it, they go, I'm scared of it, my heart or whatever. But your health, that's the thing, you're a proof of your healthy. And I'm, I don't think I'm so special that I'm like an anomaly of a physical specimen that I'm not susceptible to the side effects, but I also don't. So with these things, minimum effective dose is. Yeah, so that, he's big on that, which I love that. So in other words, it tries epitide, you're not taking the max dose. You take like almost a microdose of it.

No, I don't microdose it. That you take, that you fucking light yourself up. I thought you just said the minimal effective dose. For testosterone and other things. Like, first of all, testosterone, fine, good. I think it should be like borderline mandatory for men once they turn 40. You should have a good reason not to do it. Is there any risk?

Because otherwise I'll do it. Your blood thickens. That's like the only thing that happens to everybody. But if you donate blood and you exercise and you oxygenate your blood and you're hydrated, then you're clear. And you can get estrogen buildup, but you take an anti-estrogen and you're good. Or Primo is an antihestrogen. That's an anabolic that has anti-estrogenic effects. And so you think people will live?

How long has TRT been around? Well, check it out. In the 40s, look at this. Steroids, their first practical use, I had no idea about this. People would be interested in those. The first practical use for steroids was put into play by. by the Nazis, obviously. Yeah.

They were doing meth and roids. They were given to troops to increase aggression, reduce fatigue, and improve performance under stress while Jew hunting. Yeah. And they took it from animal testicles. So, but the thing is, so that's the thing with TRT. I understand the argument for peptides being new and there's only like BPT, BPC 157, all that. like that's only have studies on animals. I get that. The Wolverine stack, why you don't want to

take that? I understand. But testosterone, that's been studied for years and years and years. People have been on TRT for 30 years. And it's produced in your body. But so are the peptides. Peptides are just broken down chains of proteins or amino acids that have a specific effect. Right. So like GH has 191 amino acids. There's a peptide that I don't like... GH called growth, mean growth hormone. Growth hormone, yeah. I'm not a fan of growth hormone no there's a peptide called Frag 176 to 191 so that's that's epit that's amino acid 176 to 191 that's supposed to be the chain that that burns fat okay if you take GH you'll burn fat your sleep will get better your skin will get better your hair whatever

but your fucking nose will also grow right you don't want that grow right it's growth hormone like it doesn't it doesn't like pick and choose where grows. No, everything. Will your dick grow, though, with it? That's the thing. Probably. Yeah. Yeah. It's a, you know. I'm taking right now red at Trututide and Tessimorlin. Tessimorland's at night. That's the one that they developed that one with HIV patients. Muscle waste. That was for AIDS patients to target their visceral belly fat. Yeah. But I'm on the Tessimorland because my visceral fat is probably high because of my cholesterol. So they said theoretically, this will lower your, this. They so, my doctors told me Red at Trude Tide and Tessamorlin is,

it doesn't do what a statin does, but the result is your cholesterol should come down because your inflammation will come down. Yes. Yeah. I have, when I got the scan, they also give you visceral fat, so I have a pound of visceral fat. Is that high?

Is that what? That's not high. That's very low, right? They want it to be less than one pound, but if my wife, who's half my size has a pound of visceral fat and I do, surely that's not equal. Sure, right.

I'm, you know, I weigh 50, you know, way, way more. What do you right now, 220? Two? 215. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. That never lasts, though.

Yeah. Once I hit 215, I'm like, let's take the foot off the gas. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah, so, okay, so you're also the one who told me that this whole myth about protein that you need to get it within an hour of working out is a lie that was put put out by the fitness industry. Yeah. A lot of people do not know that. By the protein companies. Right.

And the set and rep scheme was put out by the muscle. magazines because they had to have something to put in their magazines. Yeah, there's three sets of ten. It's like that doesn't mean anything. It's made up to. You should really be going to as close to failure as possible on most days, right? The whole reason you would do three sets of 10th is so that the eighth, ninth, tenth rep of the third set, you're at failure. Right. So just don't get to failure in two sets. That's fine. You're failure in one set. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. So go as heavy as you can. What about your heart, though? What about your heart? But if you strain too much on your heart,

lifting too much weight on that first? No, that's not how it works. No? No. No, the thing you could do, if you're lifting too much and you're not breathing properly, you can pass out, but just breathe.

Yeah, you could, but that's like, I mean, you're, you're lifting 800 pounds and not breathing. And you did the smelling salts. Like, what did you do for chest this week or last week? I did incline Smith machine. Okay, but what were the Zathevats and reps? Oh, I did.

Yeah, Smithtown Press water. Sit down water press Yeah I did I did I warmed up with with a 45 on each side I did that like three

like three sets of 10 just Just getting the muscles I'm 45 I gotta Yeah you gotta warm it up I gotta warm it up And then what? Then I do So this I learned from Mike O'Hern

Okay You know that is Michael Harn? No tell us You definitely know who it is I don't know if you can pull him up on there But he's fucking jack Micah Oh, Hearn.

Mike O'Hern. There you go. There we go. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah, I've seen this guy a bunch. He's on juice, right? He says he's not, but whether he, so first of all, he's looked like that since he was 17. Okay.

Second of all, he's 50-something. Right. Even if he was on juice, it's still impressive. It doesn't matter. Yeah. It doesn't matter. So what did he say? So what he does is he lifts so heavy in the beginning of the workout because it primes your nervous

system for heavy, heavy weight. Okay. So when I did chest with him at Golds, he put 315 on the incline. Right out of the gate. No, you build up to it, but like you build up pretty fast. And then he put 365 on, which I couldn't do. And he goes, go over there, wait, come back after a couple people do sets. I guarantee you'll be able to do it. So you waited, what was that, 10 minute wait, five minute wait? No, less than five, probably. But yeah, yeah, I had to prime, nervous system. And then you did it? Yeah, I did it three times. You did it three times. You did it three times. You couldn't do it once. I couldn't do it once. Interesting. So, so, but,

okay, so for you with Chast, you did how many sets of the incline? Okay, so I did two working sets of incline. And what does that mean? Um, I put 225 on. I did it super slow. Right. And I, I got like nine the first time and then seven the second time. But so seven to, because you're going so slow was almost at failure. That's how you make it. That's how you get to failure in one set. You got to slow down the tempo. You can't just go as fast as you can. No, that's momentum. I'm not a weight lifter.

Right. And you need a spotter on this stuff, right? On the Smith, no. Oh, no, you did the Smith, right. No, no. But I also don't lift so heavy that I need a spotter. Right. And then I did dips.

Right. Which Michael Hearn calls the squat of the upper body. Okay. Just tricep dips, the tricep dip. Chest, shoulder, tricep back. It's like. Weighted, though. I did weighted, yeah.

Right. What do you tie on there? I put on a 45. Right. You should, and putting on weight, putting on weight. weight there is like a necessity, right? You can't just do on body weight. Unless you're a girl. Right, unless you're a woman. You can make anything can be heavy. Just do it real slow. Do it real slow and do it for as long as you can. Like you will get, you will fail. And then your

body will grow. Yeah. And then I like what you say. So you basically if you go slower, it gets harder no matter even if you're doing pause. Yeah. Pause. Time under tension, right? Time under tension. That's what it is. Yeah. So you did that. So you did the incline. You did the two working sets. One set of dips. And But to fail. Yeah. Yeah. Now let me ask you this. When you're banging your wife, do you ever pull one of those in the mirror like an American psycho?

Do you ever do that? I don't flex, but we're strategically placed. Yeah. Yeah. I would like to see myself. Yeah. If I look like that, I'd like to see myself. Well, you know what they...

I would like to bang and not see myself. Right. Well, you get hornier when you look good. If you're fucking yourself, if you're banging in the mirror and you think you look better, you'll get horny. I'll fucking do that. Yeah. I'll fuck me.

Maybe if I had hair. Yeah. You know? Okay, so then you do a set of dips to failure and then what? And then one set of heavy, like the shoulder machine. Right. Where you go like this? Yes.

Turn around that. Heavy. And that was it. Keep your shoulders down, squeeze it. And that was it for chest. That was it. But it was to failure and you felt a pump. And I did that at the beginning of last week.

And you won't touch chest again. And I did back on front. Friday. Right. And I haven't lifted weights. Since then. And you also are not spending two hours in the gym. No. Like an hour? Topps? I'm a big proponent of the cumulative effect of anything. Okay. So do it, do it, do it. Don't, because if you, first of all, if you overdo anything, you're going to burn out and get discouraged because results take time, not, like you can't bake a cake in half the time by baking it at 800 degrees. Right. You have to give things time to, to unfold or happen. So, you know, I've been working out for 30 years. Right. And when people ask how long I'm in there, if it's 45 minutes or an hour or whatever it is,

they will inevitably say, I can't believe that that's crazy because they probably went to the gym for two hours. Got it. For three months. Right. And so no results.

So obviously, it doesn't work. The gym doesn't work. That's absurd. But if you've been doing it for 30 years, what's looking at in you is the cumulative? relative effect, even if you did 10 minutes that day. I'm a big proponent of like...

So basically we're fucked if we haven't been doing it for 30 years. No, it doesn't take 30 years to get it. No. But you can't stop. Right. You can't stop and you can't overthink things because if you overthink things, you'll get discouraged also because you'll think I did it wrong. Why would I even bother doing it?

Yeah, like and you good and rest and sleep, how important it is. Like today, you know, I had a busy day and I normally would have woken up at 5 a.m., tried to go to the gym, whatever. But instead I, I slept. in a little bit longer and I had about 40 minutes after I dropped the kids off and I worked out there. Yeah. I did, I did, uh, in, in my garage. I did some, I did some bench press. I did some weighted pushups, all to failures. Kind of same idea. Prime, you know, I didn't go that heavy. I didn't have a spot or anything in a Smith machine, but then, you know, Jasmine was a little like,

she was like, you know, because the kids need to go to school. And she was like, you know, he should have woken up earlier to do this. And I said, tank Sinatra said to sleep in a little bit longer to give my body more time to rest you bitch yeah tell her that's what i said i can't believe she yelled at me the other day she yelled a tank on the phone yeah what happened she was mad first time what was it again because there's nothing better to stay hard than popping a tablet from blue chew that's what i like and for me even though i've been telling you i've been doing deep squats trying to get my asshole hovering up off the floor a little bit i'd be getting a little bit hornier but i really get horny i really get horny when i pop a tablet from blue chew and put

Top Gun Maverick. Listen, it's like peptides for your penis. That's what it is. You got to pop a tablet that you get from Blue Choo. Blue Choo Gold dissolves under your tongue and works in as little as 15 minutes. Piyoing! Piyoing! Nick's been taking him.

He's been popping tablets from Blue Choo to get his rock hard cock out to keep ice away. One thing Nick does because he sits down and he puts on the WWE WrestleMania on weekend and he pops a tablet from Blue Choo. It's what it is. He was stroking his monkey to Brock Lesnar last week. It's the number one chewable ED brand. Check that out. This ain't your grandpa's little blue pill.

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It's so, it's, you know, it's just amazing. It's time to turn those what-ifs into, Che-ching, cha-ching! Shopify. So sign up today for your $1 per month trial. Ooh. Come on. You could do that.

At Shopify.com slash hyenas. Go to Shopify.com slash hyenas. That's Shopify. com slash hyenas. Che-ching. Che-ching. Chee-chee. You guys got a fence.

Right. Oh, yeah, we got a fence. And it was too much money. Right. I don't know if it was too much money. You got the most expensive fence you could possibly buy. That's the way to go, right? Yeah.

Yeah. I go hard or go home. Go hard and go home. Around the entire property. Around the entire, I got a part. I got a section of a fence. The fence that I put around my entire backyard was supposed to be like just the front nice part. And I got around the entire yard and it was wasteful.

It was not wasteful. And Tank and I. But Jasmine was getting mad because she's like, we already paid for it. What does it matter? What does it matter? And she got mad. And I was like looking at her like, what the fuck? You're like yelling at my friend.

And then she calmed down and said she was sorry. Yeah, because I always thought she liked me. I still think she liked. She does. How much did she do you banked for? What did I get banged for? 30 or 40 grand. Yeah, I got fucking back.

For the whole property? It's not terrible, but it's, I got back. I mean, that's what it is if you go to high house. Yeah, but tank worked for a fence company for what, 10 years? You know a lot about fences. And that is, I mean, it's C. Lattice Topper. Oh, you did cedar and got banged out for 30-40?

Cedar is so expensive. Is it? The most expensive fence you can buy. That's wood, right? Yeah, but it's cedar. Oh, right? I didn't know that. So with like cedar stockade

is like double the price of spruce stockade. Okay. This is so boring. No, no, no. This is what people want to know. Is it? You want to know. We make this funny.

Listen, a lot of people need fences out there and they're going to get ripped off. So tell them how not to get ripped off. Yeah, just get multiple prices. Get multiple things you can do. That's the only thing. Yeah. And go illegal labor. Yeah.

So cedar fence lattice topper. If you could put that. Because you got a nice wood fence. How is the lattice topper sounds like a fucking, like a black lady from Detroit. All I know is the next owner of that house is going to get a great fence at a house at a discount. Yeah. I got a stick and move. Yeah.

Yeah. And, um, ooh, that is a. a nice fucking fence though guys yeah it's nice you know some people who do fall in love with fences oh yeah there's like people who have a fetish for fences and they kiss and they hugged fences really yeah I got that fence

lows wood fence but that's kind of what it looks like a little but that quality is yeah that's a bullshit quality that's not what you got but I got the nice top and then we're going to stain it and you know a different color so you get like two years um of the nice raw wood look and then you stain it

and then you get a new fence if you want to power wash it and stain it like every five years that's what you got to stain it every five years it's like four grand to stain it probably i have no idea that's what the guy's told he said about four that's not bad at all he said about four forty five hundred bucks will stain this whole fucking thing for you yeah now you got to wait till it dries out yeah yeah yeah he told me can't stay in our shit until the summer yeah now you knew that he worked for a fence company he didn't i didn't i'm an idiot i haven't worked for a fence company for years i'm an idiot and and also what tank does if you're pumping gas like my local gas station yeah

Tanks, the, does the commercial. Today you were talking about child sex slavery. And I, or some kid getting kidnapped or something like that. Yeah, and Tank was talking about. So what I see? A gas station. Yeah. Yeah.

And I said on his podcast, sometimes for me when his videos come on, I forget to pump the gas to my car because I stick the nozzle right up my ass and I start pumping the gas directly to my asshole. And I'm leaking 93 and my car broke down on the side of the BQA. Now, do you get leaking 93? has a ring to it. Yeah, should we, is that the name of the episode? Leakin'N.3 with Texanana?

Does Chris text you crazy shit? Yeah, he does. He does. Like that guy of the blue, he'll ask you about stuff? Well, the, I think we told this story on my podcast. Yeah, but nobody listens to that. Yeah. So the first time I met Chris in person with that Comedy Central Cluster Fest.

Yeah. And I, and I picked him to, Comedy Central wanted me to promote it and they gave me a trip out there. So I was like, yes. So I picked his clip about the guy on the scooter, posted it. It did fucking fantastic.

And then I went and I told him, whatever I told him I was using his clip and we started exchanging, you know. Testosterone information. You know. And when we met, I was with my wife and he sends me a text that says, I can see your cock through your jeans.

We just met. We just met. And I saw it and I never responded to it and we never talked about it again until. Yeah, until I was dying inside for months because I thought Tank hated me because I sent that text and I was like, oh, he never responded. No, baby. No, no, no, no. Yeah, it's funny. Like when you first start to become friends with Chris, you get a text like that and you're going like, what's going on here.

But then after you've been friends with him for a while, you just glance at it and you just move on to the next thing. Yeah, what time we do with the pod? You just get used to it. Yeah, you just get used to it. So, because why did you tell him that you saw his cock through his jeans? Because I saw his cock through his jeans. Because I was looking. He's just, he's forthcoming.

So I got a text from him that says, when is this? Out of nowhere. This is Wednesday. Wednesday. Okay. Okay. Hey, Cuzz, do you ever wonder what a cock may taste?

like. And we hadn't been to, we hadn't been to, we had a week. Or, or honestly, never popped into your head ever. And I wrote, ha, ha, ha, ha. And then he goes, I guess that's a no. And I go, I've wondered literally everything because I felt like I was leaving out there. But yeah, yeah, I mean, I've, I've, I've been thinking straight for 45 years. Right, right, right.

Um, have you, have you ever wondered, have you ever wondered if you were a different race? Like, what if you were Korean? Um, Because you're a fucking sick kid What is? And I go, I've been thinking nonstop for 45 years. There's not much that hasn't crossed my mind. He goes, yes, it's good to be curious.

And then like two hours later, I write Curious George, baby. And he just wrote Curious Cox. Whoever wondered what it would be like to be Korean. Yeah, I just thought, you know. You sit there sometimes and wonder about it? Yeah. I mean, I just sometimes I think about, you know, what if you had a completely different existence on this planet?

Right. Oh, yeah, the mind is like, so I'm reading this book right now called The Road Less Traveled. Oh, yeah, my mom read that. Oh, bro, it's so fucking good. What would it like to be real? You're sitting there thinking about it that way? Yeah, I was just wondering. To reach out to somebody to see if somebody else had been thinking about that too?

Yeah, yeah, I'll never, because our- I think he wanted to make it seem like he doesn't wonder what cocktail is all the... Yeah, yeah, yeah, just to take a little steak off it. Yeah, but I remember that when I sent you those texts, um, Josephine, our dog, had gotten out of the yard for the first time. Yeah. And so like, and our neighbor had like found it. And then I remember Jasmine had said, I don't see Josephine in the yard. Can you look for her? And I said, yeah, I'll do it. And then I didn't look for her and started texting you as my dog could have been running down the highway.

He had to know. Yeah. Am I the only one who wonders what it's like to be Korean? Did you wonder what it was? Well, like, what did you come up with? I just, no. Well, I think I just thought, you know, because my daughters watch all these Korean shows is the K-pop and Demon Hunters. Now there's another like beauty school one or something like that. Yeah. So I look at it. these guys and I'm like what would it be like? Like what if I was the same me I'm the same person, the same existence, same neighborhood, but I'm Korean. And my parents are Korean. So it's like, you know, yeah, they won't be like, I won't have the Italian jokes or me, but I'll be Korean. I'll be the Korean version of it all. What is that like? I don't think it happens. Right. I don't think it

happens. I think you grew up with a very different worldview and, you know, probably not making Nazi jokes. Right. You know? Right. Good thing is I think you feel, you just feel trapped. I feel trapped. But you're not, bro. Yeah, yeah. But you're not. You want to be Korean.

You just want to get out. I want to just be Korean for a minute. You just want to be Korean for a second. You're just, you're a little upset that you can't break free and be Korean for a day. That's what it is. He just wants to break free and be Korean for a day. For a second.

But that's why I'm doing peptides. I want my amino acids to break free. Yeah. Yeah. So I was in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber. Okay. Recently? Yes.

Like, first time was fine. I lasted an hour. But the last minute, I was panicked because you're locked in from the outside. Okay. And it's pressurized and it really clanks down loud when they lock it. And when the session is over, you have to wait for to depressurize. And I was getting hot. So with that in mind, I never really got over that.

I went back like a week later and tried to do an hour. And within third, I told the guy, I'm like, just wait outside for a second. Like, don't leave. Right. He locks it, walks away. And I'm like, I just. I started panicking immediately. How do you know we walked away?

You can see them? Yeah, you can see out of it. First of all, you're laying on the ground. It's like a coffin. It's bad. It's not great. So what I realized is that I don't like feeling trapped. I never get claustrophobic physically, but mentally, yeah, I'm definitely claustrophobic.

I feel like I'm trapped in this idea of what I'm supposed to be. And I'm also trying to break free of that by just... So then it's a good question. Have you ever wondered about being Korean? I have. Yeah. I've wondered everything. Yeah. Like, I don't think there's a sentence you could put together that hasn't crossed.

First of all, I'd want to be South Korean. Right. I wouldn't want to be North Korean. No, North Korean would be more options. Yeah. But then maybe the ignorance, the bliss of the ignorance from being North Korean might be nice too. There's pot. Like, you want to do peptides and you go like, what?

You don't know what you don't know. You don't know, you don't know. You don't know, you don't know. And that might be nice. You might feel really good that the leader of your country is actually the creator of the universe. That might be nice. Who never has taken a shit in his life. How lucky are they? Yeah.

Very lucky to have the Supreme Leader. Now, what is the hyperbaric oxygen tank for your bod? It, like, aggressively increases repair. Okay. In the body. So if you got knee pain or shoulder pain, go in it. Anything. Olympic athletes use it a lot.

That's how Captain America. Captain Planet? No, I think Captain, the guy that Chris Evans played. Captain America. Captain America, he was in the hyperbaric. Or maybe, I don't know, whatever the fuck it is. Superhero lore. Holy shit, you breathe 100% pure oxygen and pressure at 1.5 to 3 times higher.

Yeah, $46,000, $92,000 for a hyperbaric oxygen chamber. They are no joke. But how much is it to just go for one use? I think it was like 180 for an hour. It's not bad. No. And it's like therapy. This is what the athletes do now, right?

They just hop on that. Yeah. Any athlete that you, so when I saw a bigger, stronger, faster, which I've told you about it. told me to watch. I still haven't watched it. I got to watch it. The shift in my mindset around performance enhancing drugs completely changed. Because what does it? Talk to us about

it. So, Mark Bell is a well-known power lifter fitness, you know, fitness industry guy. His brother, Chris, made a documentary about steroid use in Hollywood, Olympics, professional sports, basically anywhere where you depend on your body for performance or looks.

Right? So he, got what really changed my viewpoint was he got Carl Lewis right Carl Lewis got the gold medal when Ben Johnson got his stripped for being on Winstrow. Yeah. Upon further digging, they found out that Carl Lewis was also on drugs. Right. They couldn't take it away from him because it's like it would undermine the sanctity of the Olympics, so they just left it.

So Carl Lewis walked away from that interview in the bleachers and he just went on and on about first of all like a pitcher, right? When they were using steroids in in baseball, that was the best time baseball had ever had. For sure. Right. So if a pitcher whose arm is going to fall off and can't throw a pitch can get a shot of a cortico steroid, how is that not a performance enhancing drug?

Right. He can't pitch without it. Right. Like why is testosterone not allowed? It was just like it shifted everything I thought. What is the reason, though? Is there some kind of conspiracy reason? Moral panic.

Got it. About steroids. Got it. TRT is the rebrand of the century. That's a steroid TRT. Yeah, you're on juice. You're on, you're roided up. Right.

You're taking steroids. But they're calling it, it's legal. TRT. And it's also not, you know, 200 milligrams a week is a lot different than 800. But once you get past a certain point, the diminishing return of the amount is like pretty low. It's like two, three, maybe 400. anything above that is all side effects.

Right. It's all bad. Right. But people get, you know, obviously they get hung up on more is better. And in a lot of cases, it's not. Right. So bigger, stronger, faster, watch that documentary and take steroids. That's the path.

Right. The pipeline. Well, were they saying in the movie that it was bad or they were saying it great? No, they were just saying that like... That's what it was. This is, you don't know about this and we're showing you about this. Brad Pitt and Fight Club took shit. Will Smith and Muhammad Ali took shit

Almost you're going to put 60 pounds of muscle on. For all these, anybody you see using an action figure Or action hero. Or it just needs to be in shape. Right. Well, they said, I saw a thing about peptides is it's following the same route as steroids did.

You start to, you know, it goes into, it circulates amongst bodybuilders at first and guys in gyms. You've known about peptides for years. Yeah. Then it goes to Hollywood actors. Yep. And they start to use it.

That's right now. And then eventually it becomes mainstream. which is where we're probably at now. And I think as regulation and quality control increases, you're just going to see more and more and more people on all kinds. This MOTC regenerates intracellular fucking mitochondria. Have you taken it? No, I haven't on the way, though.

You have it on the way. I've taken MOTC. That's right. I've taken about that. But the thing you have to take these things for months. Yeah. To see like the real results. Some of them.

Yeah. Some you do. The Red or Trutodd, you see the results. I mean, in two, three weeks. Yeah, it's crazy. Crazy. You don't want to take it, though? No, I am.

I'm going to try it. What are you on right now? What peptides you take this morning? To his appetite? I took that weekly shot. Right. And then I also got this stuff, Selang and Epithelon. Oh, Selank.

I've been taking Selank. It's for anxiety. Yeah, it just calms your mind down a little bit. I don't know if it works. Yeah, it doesn't really work for me as well. But epithalon, I have a hard time with sleep. To sleep. You can't fall asleep?

I can fall asleep. I just wake up multiple times. Epithelalaline. Eat. Yes. Right. See, look at how Jack Tears. This throws the whole intermittent fasting thing out there.

When this guy wakes up, he sit on a nightly basis and he's been doing it for years and eats like junk food in the middle of the night. I had a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich last night on potato bread. Wow. In the middle of the night. And you didn't wake up, you didn't wake up feeling like a fatty. Yeah, I did. Can a Coke Zero.

Wow. Two protein bars. A Twix ice cream bar. This is in the middle of the night. This is over, over the court. Like, I think I ate three times last night. At like 2 o'clock in the morning, 4 o'clock in the morning?

Are you eating enough during the day? Yeah. It doesn't matter. The only thing that I've ever done that's helped me with that particular problem is when I did the keto diet and my blood sugar was steady. It's definitely a blood sugar thing.

I don't know. I don't know. It's fucking, it is what it is. The side effect. This is what they say the side effects are. Of what? Of what specifically? Of steroids.

Okay. Antabolic steroids. Let's see. But just real quick, they're lumping in Tren, mastoron, testosterone, windstrol, all of them together, and you have to separate them out. But let's see overall what they say. Remember, chat GPT's a liberal bitch.

Yeah. They say testicle shrink. That's true. We're going to go true or false. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Lower natural testosterone. Lower natural testosterone. Yeah, of course. Okay, true. Infertility. Debatable. Debatable. He's got two kids on juice. I got pregnant. I got my, I don't get pregnant. Very progressive. I use the all, I use the all-gender restroom, by the way. Yeah.

Yeah, it's a good place to take a she-it. Yeah. Yes. Not my joke is from Twitter, and I love it. It was nice. Some guy, yeah. A rectile dysfunction. True or false?

The opposite. You got a fucking raging arborner. They're probably talking about Deca. Yeah. Yes, but that's like, that's a thing that almost nobody uses anymore. Right. You know? Right.

So you got a rock and hard piece. Severe acne? obviously no. No, kids' skin is amazing. Up to individual. Up to the individual. I think it's very rare, though. I don't see it a lot.

Hair loss, male pattern, baldness. Ding, ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding. I was from, Inglorious bastardsers, that's a bingo. That's a bingo. Well, I've been bald since I was,

like, I started shaved my head at 14. I never had great hair. But then I really lost it at like 28, 29. I was just like, fucking. You look good bald. You got a nice roundhead. Yeah. But it's almost better.

Dht-T-derived steroids, that's a huge problem for those. Okay, hair-lost. In straw, that's Mastoron. Okay. How about this? Now, we get a little aggression? No, he's so calm. Yeah.

Tren. Tren will do that. Tren will make you an absolute fucking mean. So if you don't take Tren, you'll good. Unless you overdo it, or unless you're, like, I think steroids are like money. Like, you just, you're more of what you are. Right. You're an asshole and you get rich.

You're going to be. rich asshole. If you're a generous person and you get rich, you're going to be a generous rich person. There's probably a lot of truth to that. How about depression, especially after a cycle? If you don't end the cycle. Yeah, I don't know what after a cycle. Okay, low energy, low libido, brain fog. Opposite. Opposite. Total opposite. Yeah. Reduce sperm count. Up to the individual, I think. Like, I got my wife pregnant with my second child. I had just stopped Trent like a week before that. I did trend for, I did trend twice for very short runs

because I was like, I'm going to go to jail. Do you really, you get so angry? You, it's, it's indescribable. You're so mad. Why? Because, heritable. Tren is a steroid that was derived for cows to get big. Right.

So it's bovines, you know what I mean? Like, they're not, it's not built for us. Right. Tren is toxic, poison, and, Nobody should ever take it. But you were fucking jacked. I look better now. Right, right.

You were bulky back then. Yeah. bulky Bartacomis. Yeah. Now we come to the big ones. Here we go. Heart disease, kidney damage, psychological addiction dependency.

I mean, psychological addiction, I'm sure. Right. But heart and kidney. So when I, I don't know, the heart is debatable because I've had an EKG every year for the last 15 years, I've never had anything. Kidney, I don't know what they're talking about.

Your levels are always good. Liver with oral steroids, you'll have a huge problem, which is why I said they were healthier, because when I first went to get testosterone from the doctor and he did my blood work, he's like, your liver enzymes are through the roof. Have you ever had hepatitis C or been exposed to it or whatever?

And I was like, no, I don't think so. So it turns out, he told me to take milk thistle, by the way, which is like, that's amazing. That's the thing for the liver. That's the supplement that actually works. Like take that and help your liver. 100%. My liver enzymes went down by like 90% in a month.

Wow. But they were high because of all the oral stuff that I was taken from vitamin shop, vitamin world, the supplements, because anything that goes to your body or stomach, that's not food, gets jammed up in there. You're digesting cellulose, which is what the pills are in. So that's the thing.

You're taking all these healthy vitamins, but you're having the same effect on your liver as an alcoholic. That's why peptides, I think, are going to be a real game changer. Because you inject it, and if you can bypass the digestive system, you reduce a whole host of side effects. Yeah. Yeah, to be honest, because they say, hey, the reason why people still debate, the debate is complicated

is because people, they work well for faster muscle growth, faster recovery, increased strength, and a leaner physique. Yeah. So, I mean, you. You can't argue it looking good. Yeah, it just looks good. At the end of the day, you can't argue it looking nice. And feeling good.

Yeah. Yeah. Feeling good. Feeling fucking God. Are you going to take anything? I'm open to it. What would you take? What I'd like to do is take something that got my energy up.

That seems nice. Make me feel young again. Your energy will go up. This feels like a facelift for men. When you lose weight. I'm down like 14 pounds doing it, but I've been doing the work. But 14 pounds. is a fucking lot.

That's what I'm saying. I've been doing the work. The peptides have just, the reda has definitely helped me curb my eating a little bit, but I've been in the gym working out. Like you said, it's just, you can't just sit there and do that and sit on the couch.

Being too heavy, it affects everything. It affects, like, I mean, gravity is just like literally weighing you down more than your bones are. Yeah. And I've been heavy multiple times in my life.

And you had more knee pain, more elbow pain, more pain. Everything hurt. Yeah. everything hurt more. Of course. But I don't know. Losing weight is almost a cure-all,

which is why these tersepotide and all these things are like, if there are any negative side effects, which by the way, the doses at which they do the research are like fucking astronomical. Right. It's like the aspartame with the rats. Oh, yeah, with the- causing cancer.

Yeah. You'd have to drink like 900 cans of Diet Coke a day. Right. To be in that range. Right. So stupid. But they go with it. But yeah.

I mean, if you use it as a tool, you're good to go. What are you doing? Effective tool. What are you doing after this? I'm going to go to the gym. The pack? The pack. And work out?

On 23rd, in between fifth and six. Ooh. Yeah. And work out? Or you're just going to go? I'm going to hang in and work out. Yeah? Yeah.

Nice. Also, the tanks good news is still out there, that page. On the gas station TVs, yeah. Yeah. That's gas station TVs. And influencers in the wild. And influences the wild, which is a fun channel. Fun channel.

That is a very fun channel. Good time. What, um, I love you. I love you, too, man. Good to see you. No, but it's, and you're going to do peptides? Dude, next time you come is we're just going to all three, we're going to, we don't even know how we're going to fit in here. Let's do it.

Yeah. Let's, we're going to, you want to take your shirt off? No. No. I'm definitely not taking my shirt off. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to the other pool.

I mean, because, look at that. Yeah. I was embarrassed to take my shirt off when I was fat, obviously. Right. When I, when I got lean. I was still fucking embarrassed to take my shirt off. How do you get your traps like that?

What's the exercise? I don't know, dude. I feel like it was at a school event for my son. It was at the beach. And I felt like I was going to make people feel bad. I was going to make the dad's feel bad. Like I didn't want to take my shirt off.

I was embarrassed on the other side of the spectrum. It's so the brain. Brain is why, yeah, so yeah. So stupid. But how do you get your traps and shoulders like that? What's the workout regimen for that? I don't do any trap exercises. Really?

So how do they look like that? Some things you got and some things you don't. Yeah. Right. That's just you've always had traps. Some people got good feet, some people don't. Some people got normal sized heads and some people don't. I don't.

My head is huge. My head is small. Yeah. Can I smell your nipples? Yeah. If you want. All right. We'll see you next.

We'll end on this. It's not really good. The nipple, he kissed it. Because you're at least a little bit, a little bit not. You're on the spectrum sexually. You're a nine, eight on the Kinsey scale. Well, I didn't lick it. You kissed it.

You kissed it. No, he kissed it. Oh, I just sniffed his nipple because I wanted to see what it smelled like. What it smelled like? It smells good. It smells like he's clean. Yeah, I'm clean. Real clean kid.

Clean nipples. Call me clean nipples. Clean nipples. Yeah. All right. A lot of guys are going to jerk off to this episode. Because you need to be put into a fucking prison. Good night.

If he goes to prison, gay within the first hour. Oh, for sure. out. Yeah. You just smelled the snipples. Is that what you did? I took a sniff of his nipples, a little nipple with us to call it.

It's just a snipple. All right, I love you guys. Go to patreon.com slash history hyenas. Here at all. Bye. Yeah. All right. As always, patreon.com slash history hyenas, the new members of the matriarchy.

We read out the names. When you sign up, you get your name right out. Hopefully it's the next week, but a lot of times we're delayed because we get so many members that sign up. So we appreciate your support. The funniest name wins the P. pseudopinies of the week. Okay, here we go. Welcome to the podcast.

Chrissy's bashful middle toe. Okay. Chicken finger. Right up the bat, yeah. Then we got Motsamut. Chicken finger. Okay. Then we got father bill, paid my bills one time.

Now I have to be at motel six and 15 minutes for the rest of my life. Okay. Rex 14. Wow, we're starting up very strong. Yeah. Ferguson. Then we got Simon Rex's. Simon Rex is Chris's balloon knot.

Okay. Kid Rock looks like Jesus of Methlehem. Take out the catapult. Yeah. Take out the catapult. Yep, that's getting on. Methlehem has been there for centuries and we've never thought of it. I mean, what we have now is what we call a frontrunner. Frontrunner. Nick Chrissley, B, Matthew Keyes.

Then we got caught. Priest having sex with my mom. He was well over the coffin. Oh, Lad of 14. It's dark. Dark, yeah. Yeah. Okay, it's a dark one, good one though.

Tone, keep life moving. My spank bank is feet picks, okay? It's just what it is. Yeah. Some of these are just what it is. Yeah. Willing to let AOC dump on my chest for reparations. Okay, dokey.

That's what it is. Hey, Bert, exclamation point. Nolan Mag. Then we got, I like to put honey on my chest and then come on my tummy, calls me the big gay honey nut. Drexler. Money. Then we got Breaking News.

Sealed Team 6 rescues G.I. Joe from Janice's ass. Put about a list. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then we got Gou at Fashion Week, aka Ughurs in Paris. Way Song Xie.

Good one. I mean, yeah, he's talking about I love goo. And he's saying to the Ughurs. Ughurs in Paris. The Muslim part of China. You know what the problem is with that? It's like the first part doesn't really

matched Uyghurs in Paris. If he had something better, if he said something like, you know, I'm a Muslim in Shanghai. Right. Call me an Ugar in Paris. Yeah, something like that. So did it match almost?

But good. Good effort. A good swing. Then we got Net and Yahu. We've had. Okay. Ace. B.B. Spank my ass blue.

Give me the bento box. Okay. Vaporize. Then we got cash, mortgage eyes, Patel. One's fixed. One's variable. Okay.

Complicated. Complicated. Jesus definitely wasn't a Leroy because the shroud had no imprint of a basketball. Five of fourteen. That's what it is. Yeah. L.D. Then we got Eskimo Bros with Katie Holmes plus matching assed hat.

Okay. Jared Waters. Squeakamuse, Bouch, NJM23, $5. Tickle Me Elmo's. Out of the trunk. Yeah, it's a hefty price, though. Two cents short. Calvin Johnson

Drop Mr. Nome's tits in Iran Problem Problems A couple of bombs Drexler Yeah, I like that Mr. Nome is funny Yeah Ryan Walker

Daniel Vanderplotz Just found out my Franks and beans Are back together Herpes, $5 I don't know what that means Oh here's $5 Don't get it, you get it? No

Franks these beans You're back together And here's your $5 dollars Okay, thank you Welcome back. Yeah. You get a chicken figure just because of, yeah. Then we got Pumpkin Dick Poppice.

Pumpkin, by the way, Pumpkin Dick Poppus, I remembered. I met Pumpkin Dick Popper. Hi. Really? Yeah, I met him. They are huge fans. Okay. They waited for me after the last show.

They're from Maine, from Bangor, Maine, and they drove down to Boston. Wow. And he said, Pumpkin Dick Pinn. What was a pumpkin? Pumpkin Dick Pappas. Because when you see that on the show. Patreon, that's me. That's me. So, and let me just tell you, your girl's a piece.

There it is. So, congrats. Okay. Riley Capararo, Shmooey, Mr. Nome's garment rentals. Alex, what did the gay blind man do to the hot hung Leroy, walked into one? Okay. Madeline Wilson Burns. May Morelli. Can I borrow your glue gun? Mine's got fumes.

Clean it. Clean it. Yeah. Chrissy's had more pilots killed than 9-11. He just used your job. Yeah, it's what it is. Yeah. Gay Ridge Boys.

Alex. The twink you just had on the podcast. That twink you just had on the podcast. Oh, Joey Camasta. Yeah. Three pesos Guillermo. Oh, $3.3. $3.3.Gilermo.

I like that. Yeah. Power bottom gay on the beam in a different way. Like that? Grace. New tunic for my favorite eunuch. Did you knit it for him? That's nice.

Jennifer Peripheris, Zachary Garfinkel, Desert Chris, Paul Gutson, Kara, Carly Dorch, Lauren Boll, My Peace, Peace, Lisa Rubishad, William Hutchinson, Matt Prego, Gal Janicelli, Jason Gorton, Uncle Ben's Court Appointed Attorney. Chris's Korean B.O. Obsession needs to be studied. It's what it is. Do you have that? I do. I always talk about Koreans' B.O. They don't have B.O. Right.

Because they have an enzyme that they can't stink. That is true. Frisbee War got me fumes scrolling the Sandra D algorithm. Mm-hmm. Some people like Frisbys, but I... Right. Latter 14. Yeah.

Lata 14 makes me flick my bean, Wei Shancheon. Mm-hmm. Rio Grande swim team. That's a good one. Yeah. That's a real good one. Do we have that one? No.

I don't have had it. It's familiar. I don't know. I know I've said my front lawns are going to look like the Rio Grande when I'm doing my, you know, when I'm doing my lawn. That's a good one. I'm going to give it a Drexler. Stinky cock. Guys, he's putting it in somebody's ass. Chicken finger. Then we got Mr. Wong Rain's Driving School, Move Over, Priz. Ways on Shian. Walked in a watch. So we only got two on the list. Good ones. Yeah. That's interesting.

So the list comes down to Kid Rock looks like Jesus of Methlehem. or breaking news. Sealed Team 6 rescues G.I. Joe from Yonis' ass. Second one is very funny. It's the definition of a Drexler. The winner. You played with the goat. Unfortunately, Clyde, I apologize.

Jordan's in the league. Yep. You got to go. Congratulations. Go to History.hahinas is back.com. See your name up in lights. You are the this week's winner. Kid Rock looks like Jesus of Methlehem. Beautiful.

Every week. Thanks for the support.