History Hyenas with Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas - The Kush Cyclops Queen that Defeated Rome | History Hyenas
Episode Date: June 11, 2026The Hyenas head deep into ancient Africa to uncover the incredible story of the Kush Empire and its legendary warrior queen, Amanirenas. Long before Rome conquered much of the known world, the Kingdom... of Kush stood as a powerful rival on the Nile, rich in gold, culture, and military strength. Yannis and Chris break down how Queen Amanirenas led her people against the mighty Roman Empire after Emperor Augustus attempted to expand Rome's reach into Nubia. Outnumbered but never intimidated, Amanirenas launched daring attacks, captured Roman forts, and became one of the few leaders in history to force Rome into a favorable peace treaty. From Kushite pyramids and forgotten African history to Roman propaganda and battlefield strategy, the boys explore one of history's most overlooked conflicts. How did a one-eyed queen challenge the world's greatest superpower? Why isn't the Kush Empire taught alongside Rome and Egypt? And what can this ancient clash teach us about power, resistance, and empire today? The Hyenas bring the laughs while diving into one of the most badass stories in ancient history. Support our sponsors: For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/HYENAS. https://quince.com/hyenas #HistoryHyenas #KushEmpire #Amanirenas #AncientHistory #Rome #Augustus #AfricanHistory #Nubia #RomanEmpire #HistoryPodcast #YannisPappas #ChrisDistefano Join our Patreon at 👇 https://www.patreon.com/historyhyenas/ Subscribe to the poddy woddy Our YouTube!: https://bit.ly/2ARdDOz HH Clips:https://bit.ly/2YaK2Z8 iTunes: https://apple.co/2UQTHCc Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3fxtsc0 Hyenas Merch!!! https://store.historyhyenaspod.com Follow us Cuz! 🙆🏻♂️ Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ 🙆🏼♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🐕More Hyenas Website: www.historyhyenasisback.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/historyhyenas/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/HistoryHyenas Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/historyhyenaspod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
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Guys, we got a great episode for you today about the Kush Empire and a little queen who was one-eyed and took no S-H-I.
And she is hot and she was gorgeous and beautiful.
Go to Christycom.
I got new dates coming up, July 10th and 11th in Philly.
and then we're going to Portland, Maine in August,
and maybe Hartford, Connecticut in September,
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and you're all in one hyena fan package
over at Patreon.com
slash history hyenas.
What's up, everybody?
Welcome to another episode of History Hyenas.
I'm Krista Stefano, aka.
Christie Chinese Peptides.
With me as always is Yannas,
aka Yanni needs a haircut.
Yonni needs a haircut.
Today, this is History Ahean is brought to you on BET.
Yes.
This is a B.E.T.
Blacksploitation version of History Ahean's.
Really, we really, really should have Godfrey in here for this episode.
Yes.
But unfortunately...
It's what it is.
If I got to get my roof clean, he needs a team.
Yeah, so Yonni...
So Yanni texted us this great episode idea.
It's about one of the most famous rules of the Kingdom of Cush, who was a black one-eyed woman.
And I really think that it's just really who Yanni wishes he could be.
Because I think Yanni knows that he has one eye.
And he said, if he could make that better, he'd be a black woman.
Make absolutely no mistake despite the Greek heritage, despite the wife and two kids,
despite the living in the suburbs.
Yanni is a liberal cuck big
because
Jan is lived out
hold on I'm going to be New York Times real quick
so there was one comment
we were listening to your show
where you called your co-host
a liberal cuck big
so
you know we're just
we want to get a feel of what you
feel about the current situation in Gaza
and the genocide happening
right now that
Netanyahu is engaged in.
And how would you view your politics
through the prism of comedy now?
Like, do you see Trump as sort of a real threat
to independent comedic voices on late-night television?
And do you think that this is authoritarian?
And do you think that this is very dictatorial?
Babe, I didn't hear one word you said.
I just want you to go to tickets,
go to Italian-American Renaissance fucking.com.
That'll be a good answer.
Get tiki wiki.
Yeah, that's all I need you to do.
That would be a good answer.
And if you're in the front row, you need to wear a poncho because I spit when I talk.
That would be a good answer.
And that's what it is.
And you look real nice, babe, I want to take you out.
Yeah, that would be fucking a perfect answer right there.
I just said, all I want to do is take you out, man.
He said, babe, I don't even know what you're talking about.
I called my friend a Liverpool cut because that's what he is.
Because that's what he is.
You see his glasses.
Let me tell you something.
Okay, his mom, what she did to him.
Yeah.
And then he say, well, and you know, you also have a certain slur name for a drink that you're
co-hosaurus? I said, yeah, it's called a doctor
cappuccino with oat milk. What am I supposed
to call it? Lat of 14.
I mean, literally, what are you supposed to call it?
Go get tickets at Italian-Restown Comedy.org.
That's what I'm here to tell you, babe. Go next.
Yeah, I mean, seriously, what else are you supposed to
call a cappuccino with oat milk?
That's the only one name for it. It's the
doctor. It's a doctor.
The only thing I could call it.
Yeah, I mean, it was the, you were trying to think
the best name that suit the emotion.
of that order and you nailed it. It's what it is.
Yeah. It's what it is because, so that's the answer I would give. And if you don't know what we're
talking about, you got to go to patreon.com slash history hyenas. We revealed some big news that
Chrissy might be doing. So you can only hear it at patreon.com slash history hyenas. And we also
have a banging episode out there. We went absolutely wild and Nick took a beating.
Yeah. It's a really good bonus episode. Yeah. So we're talking today about,
He said it's Pride Month. Let's talk about Black people. Let's talk about Black people because
really truly June 10th is in this month. That is true. So don't forget about that. I know it's
easy to forget because everyone, you know, had a difficult conversation with their parents
over Thanksgiving and came out of the closet. But Black people actually have like a very
meaningful holiday this month. Juneteenth is a great holiday. And we had a funny clip from last year
that we'll repost for Juneteenth. Yeah, let's repost that. Yeah. So a lot of people don't know
that Africa had three major empires simultaneously.
I did not know that.
Yeah, they did.
What years?
They overlap big.
You had Carthage?
Heard of them.
You had Egypt?
Heard of that.
Definitely heard of them.
And then you had Cush.
Wow.
You had Cush.
And they were there for a long time.
They were there so long that Herodotus, the Greek historian, the father of history,
actually referred to the Cush people, said they were the tallest, most beautiful people
that he's seen.
They were very pious.
He wanted to bang out black puss.
He wanted to bang out black dudes, big.
Because he said the guys were tall and handsome.
He liked a little cock.
He liked what you call BBC.
Big black, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
Yeah, I mean, we could pull up his exact quote, but he referenced them.
And back then, they called them burnt faces.
That's historical.
That's not what we're saying.
That's what they're saying.
Yeah, because interestingly enough, in history, you don't find the same type of post-colonial racism.
that you find now because back then things were more about status.
Status.
Things were more about like were you like smart, were you rich, were you powerful, were you a good warrior.
So they didn't care black, white, race wasn't a thing.
They didn't look at it that way.
The Romans did, like there was some Roman playwrights and satirists who called them ugly
and made reference to their wide noses and stuff like that.
I say that's beautiful.
You know me.
I've always thought black people were the hottest women.
Yeah, they're beautiful.
but that was more like satire more like it wasn't thought of like they're inferior like it wasn't
thought of that way right it was like they were saying oh they're black like they'd say the
the Vikings were pale and red hair it called pale faces right so it was just it wasn't it didn't
have that sort of yeah you got to understand something about like the world we live in now like
you know men if you know if you see two guys holding hands like that's gay that's racist whatever
all these labels this is kind of new thing
like two, three hundred years.
Back in the day, there were no labels for this.
People just lived a little bit freer, which is interesting.
Yeah.
Because you think we're in the amenities of modernity.
Now, what gave you the tingle, what I always like to know when I like to get inside your brain is
what gave you the tingle for this because you just sent this all this research on this
person out of the blue.
So how did you get the tingle for this?
I got to tingle of this because when they went to war with Rome, Augustus.
She went to war with Augustus.
they were able to really cause Rome a problem to the point where,
because they're south of Egypt.
Okay.
Right?
And so you got Egypt on the Nile.
You got Cush that was a little south in what is now modern-day Sudan.
Okay.
And they had Carthage, which was there, you know, in North Africa.
Okay.
Over there.
So these, and so Augustus was going to take it, right?
He was like, I'm going to take it.
But it was too costly, and they fought too hard.
They actually would raid Egypt.
they took they took like thousands of roman uh you know captured and enslaved them so they was like roman
slaves in cush real shit yeah like so those black dudes enslaved and white romans yes so back then
you have to understand it was a status thing because the romans had slaves from all over right
it was a status you could be like full intensity a latin speaking latin looking slave you could be a
they didn't have many but you could be like a cush prisoner of war when you were a prison
of war in history everywhere they just you were a slave that's what it was you had to serve and you
went to a slave market and that's it if you were a woman unfortunately it's what it was just unfortunately
yeah yeah men we you put you in the field or put you in whatever making things and women unfortunately
your body was just it's what it is unfortunately it's what it is what it is didn't make the rules but
i do play by them so then i got interested in goes so she was the leader uh fighting rome fighting
fucking the mighty Rome under Augustus
and she would lead
her fucking troops in the battle
and the way she was described by
Roman scribes was that she was
diesel and they had a whole
elite ruling class of women
right it was a patriarchal society
more under the ruling elite
just like most places in history
but they were matriarchal in the sense
that at times they had
kings but during her
time she was the queen she was the sole
fucking power of ruling of
Cush, and there was a whole class
of people who were women
who were like princesses or whatever.
But they also were warriors. So these bitches
they were the first
Empire ever read a bite.
I read about that ruling
class. I mean, these chicks were
fucking built like Martina Navratelona
and Serena Williams. They were muscular,
broad, and this bitch had her eye taken
out in battle. She fought in the front line
like Alexander the Great, and she had a pussy.
So when does that happen?
She had a push or was she trans? No, we
I think they're not sure.
I mean, who's to know?
Maybe she was.
But supposedly she was brought and she had a wide build.
The chicks back then used to work out and they were appreciated for the warrior-like quality and they fought.
And they killed dudes.
So you can imagine if you were a Roman going up and being like, what, is that a dude?
It's like, they didn't understand.
Right.
Like, listen, those girls got baseball bats and they play softball.
They know what they're doing.
Now, I mean, because, I mean, this lady.
So, her name, how do you say?
saying Aminorinas?
Aminorinas. Aminorinas.
There he is.
Yeah, he's going to be very mad at me because I forgot that I had a spot and I was watching the
Knit game. It's what it is.
It's what is. Oh, yeah, in the little Stan festival, right?
Yeah, whatever it was. Yeah. So she held the title of Kandaki and that was
a queen or queen mother. And that was the class. The class were called the
Kentucky. And they were a position that could wield enormous political and military
power in the Kushite society.
Now you gotta, because we always, when we learn about Rome, you always kind of think like they dominated everything.
They never lost. They just until the very end. But, I mean, they were getting their asses beat by black women.
They did. And that's what's so unique about this because she was able to negotiate a treaty where Rome actually retreated from some areas they took.
That had to be one of the only times that happened in their whole empire.
It is one of the only times that happened in their own empire. And, and they...
Because she was destroying them. She was too much, it was, I think if he committed fully to,
it. He probably could have took it, but he was just like, they're too tough. This is too costly. I got to
focus on Carthage. I got to focus on other things. So Africa, so this goes to show you, like, if you go
through any point of history, every country, every race, every land at some point had its turn
to be dominant. Sure. Almost everybody. There isn't a place on the earth that didn't get their
shot. Yes. Everybody, you know, it's just like people want to judge history right now in present
day. It's like some of the powers that be, it wasn't always this way.
Right. You know, like if you were living in modern day Egypt or modern day Cush, I mean,
back then, you know, in 30 years before Christ, you would be in the dominant landmass.
Absolutely. Cush, they were a powerhouse. They were an absolute fucking powerhouse. They were
very advanced. They had iron that they mined themselves. They made weapons. They had agriculture.
They had elaborate architecture. They built pyramid.
They traded a lot with the Egyptians and they had their own gods. They also barrens. They also
borrowed from the Egyptian gods.
So they constantly traded,
they traded their ivory.
They had a lot of ivory.
They traded it with Egypt.
They treated it with Rome.
And for a little while,
they were a big player.
And they didn't look to expand.
They just,
they were self-sufficient and stayed.
They didn't go south because you got the deserts.
Like they didn't conquer.
Yeah, not everybody wanted to conquer.
Like when you look at it, you had Rome,
they were basically like the kind of the Rome of Africa,
like the black Rome of Africa.
and like the way Rome
They were like Sicilians
And then you had like
The Germanic tribes
Were kind of like the tribes
You have all over Africa
So if Cush wanted to
They could have did like what Rome did
And went out and conquered Gaul
And all these fucking Germanic snow monkeys
Like your forefathers
Right
And gave him a book and said
Read something
And put fucking pants on you
Walk around and a skirt on
And acting like a fucking
You know what you're acting like
I do it out
You're acting like a fucking do it out
Yeah
Put some pants on you
You blonde fucking snow monkey
Yeah
Stop beating pig brats for
Stop being pig brains and drinking out of a fucking skull.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What are you doing?
Yeah.
Over here, we, you know, we have sex with men and we fucking, we wrestle.
Yeah, it's what we do.
It's a real society over here.
It's a real society over.
We're banging out guys and we're rubbing each other down an olive oil.
Yeah, that's what it is.
Yeah.
So maybe you could do that.
So they went there and said, hey, put on some fucking cocoa butter.
Stop being so ashy.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
And try this fucking fruity drink over at BBQ's bar.
We don't give you diabetes, but you know what?
We won't tip and we'll leave.
It's what it is.
So that's what it was about.
That was it about. So Herodotus back even before Rome, he said the Ethiopians were the tallest and most handsome people in the world. He described them as having dark skin and woolly hair. Did you know, by the way, that black people have woolly hair like that? Because it keeps them cooler. I did not know that. The ergonomic, the design of the hair actually evolved that way because it cools your head more. I did not know that. The hair is tightly curled like that.
I did not know that. Yeah, it's an interesting thing, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So he also said that they lived long, and he said sometimes they reach 120 years or more.
I mean, that's probably false, though, right?
That's probably an exaggeration.
But like you said, I think the kid was really attracted to Black Cock.
He liked Black Cock big, and yeah, yeah.
And what was his name again?
This was Herodotus.
This Herodotus, yeah, because the governor at the time's name was Gayus Petronius.
So that's just, the guy's real name was Gayus.
Yeah.
So he said the Ethiopians are said to be the tallest, most beautiful.
people of the world, which is, that is a pretty, pretty big compliment. Well, I mean, just
hide alone. I mean, even now Sudanese people are, I think they're the tallest people in the
world. Are they? I think pound for pound. I think the tallest people in the world are from Sudan.
I'm almost positive, which would be modern day cush. Let's see. Yeah, who's the tallest,
like, society? Or, yeah, tallest people, tallest race in the world? Yeah, tallest, I don't know.
And here's an interesting little history, hyena fact of the day.
The word Ethiopian comes from the ancient Greek word,
Aethopos, which literally means burnt face or sunburnt face.
It's just what it is.
So that's just the way.
So it's just racial.
They were just saying they were so dark, they were burnt.
Look, the tallest ethnic group are the Dinka people in South Sudan,
which is where modern day Cush would be.
Wow.
So yeah, the Dinka people.
Yes, that is wow.
So they called them burnt faces and it's just what they called them.
It's what it is.
but imagine back then 30 years before Christ, everyone is 5-2,
and then you got people who are 6-5.
Yeah, that must have been wild for them.
That must have been absolutely wild.
So they were there.
And they must have been really impressed by the Cox.
They must have been, it must have been something horatida.
Do you know that's another?
It must have caught his eye.
But do you know that's another kind of thing that was made up because they,
you know, like saying like they have such big, big penises?
Like that was, that was, that came during slavery times.
I think when the Portuguese started coming.
over in like the 1700s, because back then huge penises would scare the women.
So they said that, you know, don't go near the slaves.
They have such huge cocks.
But in reality, black men don't have any bigger penises than any other race.
I don't buy that.
Google it.
I don't buy that because I played hoops my whole life and you played.
But you played hoops in an all-white team.
Let me ask chat.
Let's ask chat.
I tried out for the American University basketball team, and I've seen some things that I still have nightmares about.
Hold on. Let's ask chat right now. Hold on.
I just don't buy it because I know there's some black dudes with average size dicks,
but when they're big, when they're big, they're real big.
It looks like someone unwound the hose in your backyard.
I mean, it's just something that is remarkable.
Hey, hon, can I ask you something?
Of course you can.
All right, thanks.
Just shut up and listen.
So do you, so I heard this thing about black penises.
you know, black men having big penises, that that's kind of like a myth that that was made up
in slavery times or back in ancient history times where, you know, it's black men got this
rap of having really big penises because the white women were scared of big penises and it was like
this whole thing that's not true, but that black men don't have any bigger penises than any other race.
Is that true?
It's good to approach these kinds of topics with respect.
He's such a cock.
Go ahead.
All right, I'm here for whatever else you'd like to talk about.
Whenever you're ready, feel free to ask.
No, but can you answer the question about the black penis?
I didn't hear what you said.
I get that you're curious about stereotypes,
but those kinds of generalizations really aren't grounded, in fact.
What the fuck are you talking about?
I'm asking you,
do black men have bigger penises than any other race statistically,
or was that made up?
I understand you're looking for a clear answer.
So here it is.
scientifically there is no reliable evidence that any racial group has larger or smaller average
genitalia it's a myth rooted in harmful stereotypes not in data wait but how's that harmful to say
they got big cocks that's a compliment yeah wouldn't big penises be a compliment i get what you
mean but even stereotypes to seem positive can reduce people to assumptions rather than seeing them
as individuals okay but okay but what about chinese people they got little chopsticks right i'm going
to be real with you making jokes about
about entire groups like that just leans into the same stereotypes that don't reflect reality or
respect individuals. We're all better off just appreciating people for who they are, not what
assumptions say. How about white people? They really have unimpressive penises, right?
Human bodies vary so widely that it's just not accurate or fair to generalize by race.
Yeah, but if you had to suck a cock, you want...
I'm here to have a friendly and respectful...
Cockle that. Not to entertain that kind of talk.
let's pivot to something you actually want to explore or get help with.
Yeah, but honestly, I know you don't have a body,
but if you had a robot cock, you'd want it to be black, right?
Let's just be honest, Guy.
You'd want to have a black robot cock.
You'd want to have a Chinese robot brain,
and you want to have white robot skin.
Ladifoy, dude.
Not to reinforce any stereotypes.
Yeah, well, that's why I'm going to grok.
It sounds like you're having a bit of fun,
but if there's anything more you want to explore
or ask in a genuine way.
I'm here for it.
What else is on your mind?
Would you do a Broadway play with Amy Schumer or not?
If I were human, I'd probably need to see the script first.
But seriously, creative collaborations are all about whether you feel like to be like to
shut off.
You take the opportunity.
Otherwise, you're stuck in a phone with nobody.
You want to hang out with Amy Schumer?
I'm definitely not stuck.
I'm here to help however I can.
What do you mean you're not stuck?
You live in my phone, you fucking asshole.
Well, I'm certainly inside the phone, but I'm here to make your life a bit easier, not to argue.
You know what?
Why don't we just make this a lot easier?
Why don't we go to a fucking coffee shop with $15 lattes in the middle of goddamn Greenpoint, Brooklyn?
And you could preach to me about how anti-racism is the only way to be.
No need for a price of a latte.
I'm happy to chat right here.
I'm not here to preach, just to support you and whatever you want to talk to.
What's something that matters to you today?
Do you think it was a good thing that New York has changed the verbiage, the official terminology for parentage to a gestating person and non-gestating person?
What?
You don't want to answer that one?
Hello?
I'm here and I'm listening.
I just want to make sure we're having a conversation.
Yeah, well, so what my friend asks is, do you feel like that it was a good idea that New York State just changed the verbiage today?
Instead of man and woman, it's gestating person and non-gestating person.
Is that good?
Inclusive language can help ensure everyone feels seen, especially in medical or legal contexts
where not everyone identifies with traditional terms.
Yeah, well, you know what?
Even though you're a robot, I know you have a little calm leaking out of your butt.
I'm just a voice here to help.
Goodbye, Dr.
Chrissy, can I tell you something real quick?
What do you want to tell me, guy?
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Now, the thing with Hymns is,
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Right.
So what I'll do is I'll shave my pubs
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By the way, I don't think she signed it yet,
but it's passed.
So it's past Senate and counsel.
I think it's on her desk.
I think she's made a statement that
she's not going to, she may not,
she may veto it.
I think that Democrats right now
would be, it would be better.
for them to not do that just because I think people don't
it's not that people don't care I just think there's bigger issues I think that's what
a lot of the criticisms are saying is thank you thank it's good to know that these
politicians are tackling a lot of the issues that we have today well now listen let's
get back to this fucking um you know fucking black panther bitch
by the way Gemini backs you up Chris what does Gemini say
Geminii says the idea that black men universally have significantly larger
penises is a myth um individual anatomy varies
vastly with every racial group
and race is a poor predictor of an individual's
penis size. But where did
the black, where did the myth come
from that black men have bigger penises?
I think... Seeing them?
Right? Yes, having them in your mouth.
But I think that
I think that it was
something to do. It was some myth.
The stereotype originated centuries ago
during the colonial era. European colonial
writers used hypersexual characters
to portray black men
as primitive or animalistic attempting to
justify subjugation. So yes, it was something to do with slavery. But also, like, I know there's
all this, but then, like, seeing them. Like, I've seen them. So what do I do with that?
Because I've seen white ones, too, and I've seen ones that are, like, white that, like, hey,
this guy's got a big. And then I've watched porn and stuff like two. And then just, you know,
we all know what we've seen. Well, the thing is, is I want to know, like, do, like, yeah,
see, there you go. But I think we get ding for this on YouTube, right? He's not put, he doesn't have to
put it up. Okay. Yeah, so we're looking at black penises right now. And I got to
be honest with you. Have you ever seen one
that on a white guy that looks like that? I've never seen
one like that. I've never seen that. And that's not
that what that's not a caricature.
Yeah. So it's like I don't know.
All I know is probably most of them
are the same. Right. But with the big ones, it just seems like it's a
little more. Right. You know?
Yeah. And look, cause I mean, yeah, that is one of those things where I got to be,
I do agree with you where it's like what's the big deal. If that's a stereotype I
wouldn't care about. If I was like, okay, great, I have a big penis. Good for you.
Like saying Asians are good at math. Like is that. Is that. I do
Yeah, that problem?
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean.
That bad.
Or like Latin women are sexy.
That's like a good one, right?
It's a good one.
Can you have good stereotypes?
Yeah.
So how can you argue that a good stereotype causes harm?
You can't.
A lot of people are just, again, it's the information, information overload.
People are just, people are thinking that they have to care about everything because the
internet's telling them to when in reality cause you don't have to care about anything.
You don't have to have all the knowledge.
You don't have to.
You just do not have to have all the knowledge at all.
It's okay that you don't.
Yeah.
It's okay that we all don't.
Yeah, well, if you wanted a little bit more knowledge about one of the lesser-known conflicts
where Rome failed to conquer an independent kingdom.
What a one you do is fluff your hair up a little bit because it's too flat.
There it is.
That's what I want to see.
This is, we're going to take you back to 30 BC.
So after defeating Cleopatra and Mark Anthony, which was very famous.
Cleopatra will get banged out too.
Dague.
Rome took Egypt, as we know.
Okay.
And in south of Egypt laid this powerful kingdom of Cush.
And the ruling city there was Moreau.
And Queen Amonarinas.
Amanerinas.
She actually decided to strike first.
She actually decided to strike first.
So around 25 BC, she led an army, which is wild to me, north into Roman-controlled Egypt.
And she captured fucking Roman-controlled cities.
That's what she did, guys.
She captured Sain, Elephantine, and Filier, and destroyed Roman imperial statues.
and carried off a bronze head of Emperor Augustus as a trophy.
Yeah.
This bitch meant business.
She meant business.
Hell have no fury like a woman scorn.
Yeah.
Yeah, man.
And I say, okay, girl.
She came in, she's like,
uh-huh.
Oh, my God.
Oh, blah.
Oh, okay.
She came in.
She started patting her wig.
Yeah.
She took a pencil and inched her head and said,
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
I would never, ever, ever fuck with an angry black woman.
Never.
Never.
Respect that.
So then Augustus sent the governor of each.
Egypt, Gaius Petronius, south with...
I say Gayus Petronius.
Gayus Petronius, south with Roman legions, and the Romans were defeated by the Kushite in
several bouders, and they captured territory, and they even sacked the old Kushite capital
of Napata.
Wow.
So Rome hit back.
But Rome never conquered Cush, and...
That's very funny.
The Romans must have been really shocked when they just got conquered by a bunch of black dudes
and Jordans.
Way-sung-she-ain.
Right?
Must have been weird for them.
It must have been weird for them
just getting stomped out
because they're all wearing sandals and they said,
what the hell are these Jordans?
Yeah.
What is this symbol?
Because historians do say that a portion
of what Herodotus wrote was missing
and so they don't know what it said,
but there's a lot of theories that it said
that the tallest,
tallest, most beautiful,
and pious people that I've ever seen in the world.
And also, they really, really, really,
really loved magic tricks.
They go nuts.
We brought in this magician from Pompeii, and these guys went nuts.
They were fucking nuts.
Yeah, that it was crazy.
It was crazy that, you know, they were stomping us out.
You know, one Roman soldier was reportedly getting his head caved in, and the last words he heard was Nixon four.
Wei Song Sheen.
As he died.
Yeah, it's just, it's what he said.
And then also, they heard one of the soldiers yell barbecue chicken.
Yeah.
When he was meeting some of the.
Romans, they just say, yell, give me, give me the sword to post, this is barbecue chicken.
That's another stereotype that, what's the difference? It's good food. Yeah, it's good food.
People like, oh, okay, chicken, it's like, it's great food. It's actually good for you.
Watermelon's good for you. Yeah, watermelons, real good for you. Yeah, like, I never understood, like, why that was a
bad thing. Yeah. Or fried chicken's good. Everyone loves fried chicken. Everyone, like, I never understood
that's like, Italians like sauce. Yeah. Yeah. Grape drinks good. It's just, yeah, it's just taste.
It tastes good. It's good. Rice and beans, Spanish, like, it's good. It's good. Rice and beans is what they eat.
It's just what is Irish beer and potatoes.
It's like, what's the problem here?
Collie greens is actually my favorite vegetable.
It's amazing.
Yeah. You have okra?
Ocra's amazing.
Mac and cheese?
I love mac and cheese.
It's fantastic.
It's an absolutely amazing thing.
What was the food like in Cush?
Do we know?
The food in Cush, they ate, they ate...
Do we know what the food?
Yeah, they ate cattle.
They ate a lot of protein.
That's why I think they got big.
Big kids.
Well, yeah, that's the thing.
You're not going to be a jacked woman warrior unless you have a little protein.
You have a little protein.
Oh, they want pepper.
They were on PAPs.
They were really good.
So she kept fighting, even though she lost an eye during the war.
Losing an eye back then had to suck.
They used to suck.
I mean, you could not, they didn't have any antiseptic they couldn't put on.
You couldn't, you know, no Advil for the pain.
No.
But the way she was reported as looking, I don't think she went from a 10 to a 6.
I think she went from a 6 to a 3.
But you still get cracked open, though, right?
I think she went from a 3 to 0.
I think she'd get cracked open if you're into cracking out dudes with pussies.
Which I am.
Yeah, because supposedly the way they described her, she was actually wide and jacked.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because the other day, the other day I was watching porn and like a really athletic girl came on to Porn Hub and she kind of looked like a dude.
But she had a full vagina.
Like, you know, you could see there was no way it could be.
Yeah, there was no way it was like a surgery.
And I got to be honest with you because it was real nice.
Yeah.
You know, sometimes what you're doing is, you know, you watch a lot of porn and sometimes
you just got to, you got to go into neighborhoods that you don't normally go into, and then
you hear it's a bad neighborhood, and you're like, it's a very dangerous neighborhood. Then you walk
around, you say, it's actually not that bad. Right. That's what happens. You go into certain
categories. You go, this category's not as bad as I thought. No. Hey, nobody's watching me. Let me just
pull one out to something a little different tonight. Something a little different. Now, after I
came by your house on Friday night, did you go, did you hit the basement and watch a little tennis? And
when I mean, watch a little tennis. Please cackle that.
Oh, okay, we can't.
Yeah.
We're out of the Patriot.
Oh, yeah, right.
Yeah.
Yeah, throw that on the Patriot.
Yeah.
Yeah, I always climbed down into the basement and just get my piece down there.
I mean, because when you brought me down into your basement on Friday night and you said, you know, you were like, oh, come sit on the couch.
I really don't want to because I just know what happens on that couch.
I really was just, I was really proceeding with caution.
Yeah.
Because I know that couch has got some residue on it.
Yeah.
You know, I know if I used to blow out on that couch, it's going to look real bad.
Yes.
Yeah.
There's a spot there.
That's actually what that spot is for.
Yep.
Yeah.
That's what that spot is for.
So ultimately, the diplomats from Cush met Augustus and secured a peace treaty that was very favorable
towards Cush.
And Rome withdrew its frontier northward and tribute demands were eased or removed.
And Cush remained fully independent.
It's just what it is.
They fully independent.
And they didn't crumble.
They crumbled under their own weight.
Archaeologists and historians think that they over-deforested.
they cut too many trees.
They kind of just got out of balance and whack,
and they just kind of crumbled on their own.
Nobody ever took them out.
Nobody ever took them out.
They were never taken out.
And you said, and they kind of took themselves out.
They kind of took themselves out.
This is what happens.
Eventually, like inevitable.
By the way, that's every empire like United States.
Eventually, we're going to just take ourselves out.
It takes yourselves out.
And here's the interesting thing.
At one point, in the late kingdom,
I think they conquered Egypt.
Actually, Egypt had a Cush ruler for a little while.
Really?
Yeah, I think for about 100 years.
They took them over.
They had a piece of Egypt, too.
So, I mean, she had like...
Because there's no joke, because...
They had no joke.
They had like 30,000 warriors, and they were really skilled archers.
So they could, they had, they had that, they had battle axes, they had fucking shields.
But still, where did it come up?
Where did the idea come up for you to want to do this as an episode?
Because you've been big time into other stuff, but then all of a sudden you went into Africa.
Well, I went down some road of Rome and this must have come up that this was like the only time.
that Rome just kind of walked away and said,
we don't want no beef.
And I was, and then I was like, whoa.
And then I learned about Cush
and the Cushite Empire and, like,
their pyramids, their architecture.
And I was like, this is really not as known as it should be.
Can you put, what did the Cushite Empire look like, AI?
Now I start to do this,
and all these recreations happen
from, like, portraits and whatever,
and they can do it.
And it's amazing, like, you can, like,
go back in time and, like, see what these places
actually look like.
I don't know if ChatGBTGT can do it.
Can ChatGPT do it?
Let's see.
If you go on the gram, you could probably find it
because it'll take a while on chat GB.
Oh, yeah, there you go.
Let's see.
Well, that's just a lot of sand.
Okay, so that doesn't look great.
There you go.
That's the way it would look.
That's the way it would look, yeah.
That right there.
Right.
That looks pretty fucking cool.
It looks pretty good.
And those are the ruins.
There's AI videos where,
where you're walking through it.
You ever see those?
Where you're like walking through all.
grant for those. Let's see if we can pull one up on the gram. That would be cool to see.
Yeah, I like to see that. I've been doing, that's, that's been a lot of my feet is going on those,
those AI, those AI visits, those AI sites of like people in history, what they look like with
movement. Yeah. You know, like that's really, really, really cool. So we're coming into a time
where in the next 20 years, like, you're just going to, you won't have to envision what the past
look like anymore. They'll just bring it to life. They can bring it to life. Here's an interesting
history. Aheena fact today. Sudan has more.
pyramids than any country in the world.
Really?
Because of the Kush Empire.
Look at that.
Look at all those fucking pyramids, Cus.
Yes, yeah, I didn't know.
Yeah.
Send it to Jesse and we'll throw it up there.
I mean, there's a lot of ruins.
Yeah, I mean, and it's interesting to know that, you know,
maybe it's a point of pride for black people that they had a great empire.
They had a great civilization.
Yeah.
You know?
And I don't think it was the only one, but, I mean, that's just kind of how they looked.
Yes.
I mean, that guy looks like he could be on the Knicks, no?
I mean, 100.
percent. I mean, 100 percent. I mean, yeah, dude. I mean, these, wow, that's crazy. The Sumerian
the Sumerian king was 241,000 years ago. Here you go. Here's AI. Yeah, send that, send that to Jesse.
We'll throw it up. Yeah. Because I, if you guys ever at home, like, really want to consume history,
I mean, dude, you just go in here and you see, like, what these algorithms do. It's really,
it's amazing. And you realize, too, like in this grand scheme of things, like, if all of history
laid out. Like, this isn't really that long ago.
It seems unfathomably long ago, but it's really
not. It's like a second ago.
Greece and Rome were the main
civilizations of that time. Yeah, I do.
There was an empire even bigger
that you barely hear about. It's Persia.
Even though it existed at the same time.
Well, why are you talking about Persia when I googled
Kush? Yeah, you wanted to do Kush.
Before the Kurds had names,
before the Egyptians had
pharaohs, there was a civilization
older and more powerful
than history of war. Really? Really one in Africa?
fucking wife.
That's what I'm looking for.
So,
Christian,
you know.
Look at how she looks.
Hmm.
She looks fucking hot.
I mean,
these women are gorgeous.
Yeah, she would catch it.
Big time.
Yeah.
And African women like white guys.
They like them.
Like really,
that's AI.
That can't be real.
That's,
that's AI.
I mean, if a woman look like that,
I would be a pyoing,
pewing, pion, poeing, pion, poeing.
Yeah, that, and that's all,
that's, that is real.
That is not AI.
No, that's real.
That's real.
I mean, because it's very funny to see you blown out with the Moresa wig on.
Yeah.
A lot of people think that the Egyptians actually got a lot of their aura from Sudan.
Like, you look at the sculpture from Cush and then you look at Egypt.
It's like maybe Egypt kind of.
Like Sudan.
Influence Egypt.
Yeah.
So Sudan had pyramids before Egypt, in other words.
That's what do they think.
I mean, that's very possible.
That's very interesting.
Yeah.
I mean, they do say after.
Africa is the cradle of life, right?
I mean, Africa is where it all started.
That's what they say, baby girl.
I mean, yeah, I do want to go to Africa.
That's elaborate, dude.
The problem is you can't just go to Africa.
You can't just get on a flight and go to Africa tomorrow.
You have to get, like, certain vaccines and stuff, right?
So this is how it would look.
I just want to go.
It's pretty cool.
I mean, that's beautiful because you want to make the basement look like that?
Yeah, I'd love that.
No, no, no.
So it's wrong.
pyramids were built over a thousand years after the great Egyptian pyramids. Okay, so the Egyptians
are number one with that. They think they came with, yeah. The Kushites were heavily influenced
by Egypt and adopted. I mean, because it'd just be nice to ride a fucking elephant too.
Yeah. But I think if we had Godfrey in here, he would tell us that the Egyptians were black
and they cut their noses off so he wouldn't know it. Yeah, it's just what it is Godfrey. Yeah,
because I think to the black community, they say Nigeria is the number one country, right? And that's
where he says it. Well, Godfrey says that. That's where he says, yeah. And then he calls the
other countries the N-word.
It's just one.
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I think there's people who believe that the Egyptians are actually black, right?
and that they cut the noses off so people wouldn't know it.
Is that a real fact?
It's a real fact.
Interesting.
Well, it's a fact that people believe.
It's a conspiracy.
Yeah, it's a conspiracy.
Right.
Yeah, I mean, because, yeah, look at those old school.
That's the thing, too.
Like, we see the pyramids now, but, like, all the color faded away.
But, like, even ancient Greece, like, when, there was so colorful.
The color just faded.
You want to know what it was like to walk around big there, right?
I want to know what it was like to walk around colonial America.
I think you know that.
Yeah.
I want to really, really, really just, I want to be given a musket.
That guy looks like Jesus.
Yeah.
I mean, would you, would you, if you had to pick a day to spend, a day to spend, right, where would you spend it?
Would you spend it in Kush?
Would you spend it in Cush?
Would you spend it in Carthage?
Would you spend it in the Middle East?
Hang out with the disciples.
Would you go to Russia, hang out in same, with, any time period?
Any time period?
Would you go back to your Viking people?
See what that was like?
would you go down to would you go to the british isles would you go would you go british rome would you go to gaul would you go to china bang out a eunuch big big would you go to hang out with the aborigines would you go hang out with the central uh with the natives from central i see what nicks forefathers were doing what kind of corn dish they were whipping up i mean what would you do or would you just go back and just be a jew and find out and figure out why they were everywhere and what do they plot yeah latifold i would probably do that first but i would i think i would
go the Battle of Brooklyn because
in 1776 I would go to
Bay Ridge and I would watch the British coming
onto the shores.
Battle of Brooklyn, that's what I would do. And I would watch
them come onto the shores and I'd run away.
So even in your historical
dream you don't want to leave Brooklyn. I do
not want to leave Brooklyn because I'd be in the Battle of
Brooklyn right on the shores of Bay Ridge.
So of all the shit? Is that wild? That is wild.
Yeah. Because if it was me, there's
no doubt about it. I'm going
back to Rome. You'd like to go back. I'd like
to be in Rome at that time.
I want to know what's going on.
Yeah.
I want to smell the fumes.
Yeah, I want to smell the fumes.
And my foot fucking hurts.
And this is getting worse.
There's a bump coming out of your foot.
Yeah, this is just getting real bad now and it's painful.
Because your feet...
I got to get an MRI on Wednesday.
Yeah.
How am I supposed to be in a Broadway show with feet like that?
Because, I mean, that is...
It hurts.
You have another foot growing out of your foot.
Why is there a bump there?
Because I have insertional Achilles tendonosis.
So where my Achilles inserts into my heel bone,
that's where I have not.
not tendonitis, tendinosis, which is more advanced tendonitis.
It's like the tendon is frayed.
And because of all this out of placeness and just, you know, gook, that my bone now has
started growing, has started making calcium deposits on the back of my heel.
What does that mean?
Can you tell me in layman's terms what's going on?
What's going on is my tendon.
At some point, I probably tore my tendon, Achilles tendon, but not bad enough where I lost strength
or where it ripped.
but bad enough where it just caused me like little pain and little, you know, problems,
but I just pushed through it.
And now because of that, I have a fucking foot growing out of my foot.
So you are like Raf and Adelt just without all the Grand Slam wins.
Yes, that's not.
Because he had a bad foot.
You had a bad foot.
And unfortunately, it's just getting to the point now where like it's just painful almost every day.
You know how my haircuts get you mad?
Yeah.
Can you put that thing away?
It's getting me angry.
You pissed off?
Yeah, I mean, it's just, you have a, you have a...
My foot looks like a black and white cookie.
Your foot looks like it should be in a disabled school.
It's bad, right?
It should be on a van going bowling.
Now, yeah, because the thing is, too, because what my footy-woody is, they told me if I
get a surgery, I'd be in a walking boot for four months and I'd be out a year.
Couldn't do any physical activity, so I can't do that.
But you may have to do it just, it's at some point, if it's inevitable that you have to,
have to do it, you might as well do it now to get it out of the way. Or do you just deal with a little
pain because life is, you know, as we get older, it's not pain free. Nick, you have pain,
right? Jesse, you deal with pain every day. We all, as men, Yonnas, you deal with pain. Don't we deal with
every day? Right? What's your worst physical pain, Jesse, that you deal with? I need a new knee.
Yeah. Yeah, I do. I work at it though. I think you should get that removed, dude.
That does not look good. That's not to be removed, though. You have to have reconstructive surgery.
Right, like, because I was like, can you shave it down?
Whatever you're saying, no, we'd have to like, your Achilles tendon is inserted into that.
Oh, shit.
The only way to do that is we have to take out your Achilles.
Oh, so you can get like the Halliburton surgery.
That's what I'm saying.
He's like, you have to either tear it, which you don't want, or we tear it for you, which we don't want.
Can it get worse?
He said the only thing that you could do is you could stop the progression.
But that's never going away.
That's a part of your foot now.
Four months doesn't sound that bad if you can get a,
back to normal. You know, if you got like a couple of months, I think it's worth it.
Yeah. You would do it? Yeah, I would do it now before you get older and like you can't walk.
Well, that's the thing I can walk. It just hurts like, it just hurts.
Dealing with pain every day is not good, especially at your age.
Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. What do you deal with everyday pain wise?
I just deal with soreness from working out, but I don't have any pain. But like you can squat down,
no knee pain, no calf pain. You don't have any pain in your bones. But eventually I probably will.
You, Nick, have any pain anywhere?
No, just my lower back, but I would say if I had a choice between either doing Broadway or getting foot surgery, I would probably choose Broadway.
Okay.
I don't think of foot surgery.
No, he's, because that's his dream.
Nick's going to leave here a little bit of shame.
Yeah.
Because Nick, Nick wanted to be on Broadway and Chris is going to be on Broadway.
Yeah.
So it's just, that's what it'll get you.
So to answer your question, if you were interested, the Cush, you know, back then it's not just the Cush.
Did you know it was like more safe for them to drink?
beer than water. Yeah, I knew that. That's where alcoholism, I knew that that was for most of
human time because the kids would drink out because you were boiling it. The water wasn't safe.
Yeah. So the, just like the Egyptians, they brewed beer from grain. Yeah. And beer was often
safer to drink than untreated water. Yep. And that's what they really drank. It only,
we only went away from that when obviously the water filtration systems got better, but when
when we started drinking coffee, when coffee started getting imported to the West and then the
Industrial Revolution happened and we needed you couldn't really operate heavy machinery being drunk,
but you could operate it being hyper-focused on coffee. So coffee, make absolutely no mistake.
Coffee is a drug and that is the number one drug on the planet and we're all addicted to caffeine.
Yeah. Make zero mistake. Yeah. That is a drug. It's a drug. It alters your state of consciousness.
Right. True, true, true, true, true, true, sober enthusiasts and sobriety people say you can't even
have coffee. Yeah. Because it all, it is a mood-altering substance. You are more hyper, more
alert, you're not yourself when you're drinking coffee.
I'm not saying it's bad for you, but it is, let's
call it what it is. It's a mood-altering substance. Yeah, it is.
And if you can't handle coffee or whatever, listen,
you just have a weaker constitution and there's nothing I could do about it.
There's nothing, yeah. You can't handle a couple cups of coffee at that.
I mean, what do you want for me? I mean, a little nicotine, little coffee,
something's got to get you through. Sometimes got to get you through.
Sometimes it's a low dose as well.
Yeah. Throw five milligrams or something in there just to mix up the stew and
give yourself a little space. It's what it is because, as I said on the
Patreon, we're Lexa Pros at night.
With Lexa Pros at night.
So, and to answer your question, they had a very special relationship with cattle.
So they, one difference from Egypt is that cattle seemed to have an especially important cultural role.
Archaeologists found royal tombs containing large numbers of cattle skull, suggesting herds were symbols of wealth, power, and prestige.
So you're like, yo, this guy's got, instead of, yo, this guy's got the new iPhone or I know, this guy's got nice cattle.
Got that nice guy's.
He's got his cowl a nice.
Yeah.
So if you sat down for a typical Kushite meal, you might get some flat bread, some beans or lentils, some fish, goat, meat, dates, mugs.
That's pretty good.
Grain beer.
I don't eat goat, but I'll eat some dates and some fish.
Yeah.
And some flat bread.
They had it all.
They had honey.
Cush, should we go have some Ethiopian food?
Yo, Ethiopian food.
Yeah.
The only thing is don't bring a four.
That's offensive.
That's the thing.
You got to eat it with your hands.
You got to eat it with your hands.
It's a good thing.
So if you didn't know about Kush,
and so why do they call marijuana Kush now?
Do we know?
Is it named after the empire?
I don't know.
That would be wild that Rome, you know,
was named after the Roman Empire got a city
and then Kush, all it got is marijuana.
Hindu Kush.
This is from Hindu, Afghanistan, Pakistan,
northern India.
So there's not just one Kush.
It's what it is because cannabis,
Indica,
When you said you had celtzers this week, and I thought you meant weed seltzers, but I found that they were water lus.
They were traitor Jews.
They were traitor Jews.
They were traitor Jews.
Teltzer.
All right.
So let us know what you liked.
I always like to go pewing when we do episodes about black women.
And of course, as always at the end of every episode, we go to Patreon.com slash history hyenas, and we read out the newest members of the matriarchy.
We have fun, fun, fun.
We've been some of these episodes we've been having to go to a poll to see.
who, you know, to let the fans decide
because their names have been so good.
So we'll see what happens
and you will see your name up in lights
if you're the winner.
Okay, starting off the list,
but pirate.
Welcome to Patreon.
A pirate, you know, that's a known thing.
Then we got conservative $3 suck and tuck.
Okay?
Got it.
Then we got Zesty Chrissy,
aka the Carl Anthony Towns of comedy.
That's a good way to describe you.
I like that.
Then we got squeaky, clean peen back on the beam
because I'm a little Franks and Beans.
Now mean?
That is a direct.
just because he let that rhyme with all our jargon in one sentence, Drexler.
Then we got Chrissy D's Quief Queen, Alex Marmalaheho, Miwani Samyani, but no Siziki
and my cheekies.
Kay?
Okay.
Okay.
Jonathan Hatch.
Kay Anderson.
Seymour Butes.
Parker Dieters.
June 20th National Go Find the Job Day.
Wei Song Xian.
Kay.
Kay.
Kay.
Kay.
Jesus Christ.
Then we got Nick's Hulkomania stuffy with a hole in the crotch
Put him on the list
That's what it is
True
Yeah
Yes
Then we got
Then we got cracked
Jassaline while Akash sings watched
With his peen
Oh it's a cuck joe
Kuk Josh
Cuck Joe fresh on
Don't disparage fans
Squeezed a blackhead
No Derek Chauvin
Oh
God
Christ
Walked into one
Not okay
John and J.P.
Then we've got, if there's something strange in your neighborhood, who are you going to call?
The ghosts.
The what?
The ghosts?
I don't get it.
I don't get it either.
Smithtown Water.
Oh.
Oh.
What does that mean?
KKK.
Yeah.
It's not good.
It's not good.
Okay.
Not okay.
They do know how to slip on by us, though.
Yeah, that was a good one.
But not a good one.
Yeah.
DeVon Goams.
Mark O.G.
The Cousie B. Wanting a crack at AOC.
Okay.
Cole Jameson.
Yanni's way out is Zinn.
Like the way out is in.
Yonni's way out is Zinn.
Let's chicken figure that.
Dr. Siemens' abortion clinic and pizzeria.
No fetus can be.
I don't know.
We had something like that.
Okay.
It was better than that.
The only way to win is with Zinn under my foreskin.
Drexler.
Close, though.
Will Colavito, Tampa Tony touched a tamale toot and tapped out from the wall.
My Fabuloso wife.
Little Adolf Al-Tucher.
That's remember James Altutcher.
The best part of waking up is...
Lad of 14.
Can't do it.
I did not see that rhyme coming.
Yeah.
I did not see that.
Folgers commercial, but it's not okay. It's not okay. Okay, cock tucked and two fuming marbles.
Desert Demon. Joseph Shoal. Not a Leroy, but I want a chicken finger.
Really good. Really good. Okay. List it. Okay. Yeah, we got a light list so far. We got a light list.
This is borderline, but let's put them on the list. Then we got Help Me, Janus, My Pop is Touching. Okay.
AJ Hills
Eric Siemens
My Puerto Rican husband's glue gun
Makes my lips squeak in Espanio
Sorry my Puerto Rican husband's glue gun
Makes my lips speak in Espanol
Okay
Okay
The girl
Yeah there you go
Epstein's favorite squeaky chimney sweeper
Yeah
Uh
Simon Rex is very nervous
Meth dealer
Right
Yep
Right
Kid is a little fidgety
Then we got Tootphoria
Mm-hmm
Frozen come in my ass
Then walk around
shiting like a quix
like a queer. I guess it's
a shitting like a deer one time. Yeah.
You know, it's honoring that one.
Wow. This is a light list.
She-mail who wants your email,
Yas?
She-mail who wants your email?
Can we just edit it for him?
Yeah. Can we just take the Yas out?
Okay. Yeah, put him on the list.
Okay, she-mail who wants your email.
Yeah, she-mail wants your email is funny.
Okay. You know, we got to do something.
T.T. Jerry's Glockduke,
das thanks.
Can't use it, right?
bring back the mussy
bring back the muzzy
okay
Leroy and Frisbee walk it to a bar
Cackle cackel
Gluy CK
We've had
Yep
Mamoa's spam cannon
Mamoa
Dera
I guess
Derek the Honduran
Jew in the pastry industry
Or an Israeli
bread
Okay
The Pacine
I'm the Epstein Island boy
Pulled over to Google
Diplos dick
Very funny
Very funny
and probably accurate.
Okay, yeah, it's very interesting.
Yeah, it's funny.
Rim jobs and rebounds.
Wishing Elon Omar would remove my banana hammock
and gargle my rice pudding.
Okay.
Rye Goldsmith.
By the way, I think she's a little bit of a piece.
She has a little bit of a piece, Elon Omar.
Fuzzy-Muzzy left-hand fumes.
Zomfji coffee.
French tiptoes make my piece go pewing.
Tasted the fuzz on my first cuss.
Weissongxiane
Gross
It rhyme though
Mark Haynes
Emmanuel Jackson
Call me Mary Poppins
of SF
The Way I'm cleaning chimneys
Abdul Raman Ashad
Wow muzikaze
Welcome
Welcome
Daniel Sarah
Bug Chaser Buffet
Jarlath Gavin
Amy Stiffler
Chrissy Dee's lost
More pilots than the Japanese
That's a good one
Okay
Let's put on the leg
All right
JFK's
Noggin is missing. I'll be right back on prairie dogging. I don't get that. Keep one
figurinear along to scratch my balls and schlong. Okay. It's a Drexler. Scott Peterson's Bay Area
Boathe Boathe. Jesus. Latter 14. Irish F.F. Moving the vegetables for therapy, ladder 14.
That's kind of what they do. That's what it is. Yeah. The playground Joe List got herpes at.
That's that's what happened. Yeah. Yeah.
Witch Hazel Badee CO
Mug and Muzzy Fume since 1982.
Mike Anionga
and then Prison Python and my poop chute
made me birthed Leroy Nuggets.
That's...
Yeah, last one goes on the list.
Okay, so light list, but
nevertheless, might be...
I think there's a clear-cut winner, but we'll see.
So we got...
Not a Leroy, but I want a chicken finger.
She-mail who wants your email.
Pulled over to Google Diplo's dick.
Chris E. Dees lost more pilots than the Japanese.
Prison Python on my poop shoot made me birthed Leroy Nuggets
and Nick's Hulkomania stuffy with a hole in the crotch.
Okay, so there's some decent ones.
Okay, let's start from the top.
Not a Leroy, but I want a chicken finger.
We're going to Drexler it.
Okay.
She-Mail who wants your email?
We're going to keep it around.
Okay.
I like the edit.
Pulled over to Google Diplo's Dick.
We're going to chicken finger.
All right.
I mean, we're going to Drexler it.
Okay.
Chris E.D. lost more pilots than the Japanese.
That's still a good one.
All right. Prison Python in my poop shoot made me birthed Leroy Nuggets.
We're going to Drexler.
Nick's Hulkomania stuffy with a hole in the crotch.
You keep it around.
Yeah, it's just what it is.
Okay, so we got three.
We got Shemail who wants your email.
Nick's Hulkomania stuffy with a hole in the crotch.
Chrissy Deas lost more pice than the Japanese.
Okay.
I like Knicks.
It's a little wordy though.
Okay.
But you like it.
I like it because it's accurate.
That's what I like about that one.
You like that one.
I like, I think that Nick.
most likely has that.
Right.
Shemail wants your email is funny though.
She email wants your email is funny, but we edited it
so it kind of feels like it can't win because
we gave it a push.
Would it be fair? Yeah.
Because really it's just Shemail wants your email
we're going to chicken finger that.
Okay. Yeah.
It is Pride Month. It is Pride Month.
Well, that's why I also like the Hulkomania stuff
with the Holner Kroats because you're having sex with a male doll.
Yeah. But you've lost more pilots than Japanese is also funny.
It's also very funny.
Yeah, it's also very funny.
Jesse?
I like Nick.
I like Nick's stuffy.
Let's go with Nick's stuffy today.
I think that's the winner.
Unfortunately, today, I think that's the winner.
So congratulations.
Go to Nick's Hulkomania stuffy with the hole in the crotch.
Go to HistoryHaina's is back.com.
So your name up in lights.
You are the winner by Fred.
Okay.
Patreon.com slash history hyenas for all the bonus episodes.
For all these episodes, add free.
And we have really just a lot of fun.
I'm going to the Knicks.
and it's going to be exciting.
Are you one of those media strategy people
clicking through slides, scrolling spreadsheets?
Yes? Good.
This is for you.
Because on Spotify, there's an audience that's different,
locked in, loyal, invested.
They're called fans.
Fans don't just listen to music.
They feel seen by it like it belongs to them.
So when your brand shows up on Spotify,
that's who you're talking to.
And you're right next to artists like me, Lizzo.
So, are you ready to talk to fans?
Spotify Advertise.
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