How Did This Get Made? - Green Lantern w/ Paul Rust (Classic)

Episode Date: August 25, 2026

In blackest night, Paul, Jason, June, and Paul Rust went to see 2011's Green Lantern starring Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively. Then, in brightest day, they all reunited to figure out what the hell happened. They discuss the awful CGI, the soap opera quality sets, the ultra-quippy dialogue, how you can simultaneously be a Lantern and hold a lantern, and so much more. Plus, the crew read listener submitted versions of the Green Lantern's oath. (Ep. #14 Originally Released 7/12/2011) • Go to hdtgm.com for tour dates, merch, FAQs, and more• Leave us a voicemail at speakpipe.com/hdtgm• Submit your Last Looks theme song here• Join our Discord at discord.gg/hdtgm• Buy merch at howdidthisgetmade.dashery.com/• Order Paul’s book about his childhood: Joyful Recollections of Trauma• Shop our new hat collection at podswag.com• Paul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheer• Paul’s YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheer• Follow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer• Subscribe The Dark Web w/ Paul & Rob Huebel: youtube.com/@enterthedarkweb• Listen to Unspooled with Paul & Amy Nicholson: unspooledpodcast.com• Listen to The Deep Dive with June & Jessica St. Clair: thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcast• Instagram: @hdtgm, @paulscheer, & @junediane• Twitter: @hdtgm, @paulscheer• Jason is not on social media• Episode transcripts available at how-did-this-get-made.simplecast.com/episodesGet access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using the link: siriusxm.com/hdtgm Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Green Lantern, America's 25th favorite superhero. They made a movie of it. We saw it, so you know what that means. Now we're how to this campaign? We're going to have a good time, celebrate some failure. Not just be a hater because you know you wonder. How did this campaign? Let's walk in the mediocrity of subpar art.

Perhaps we'll find the answer to the question. How did this get paid? Hello, everybody. My name is Paul Scheer. I am joined as always by Jason Manzukas and June Diane Raphael. Paul? Oh, you doing guys. What's up?

And we have a very special guest today to talk about the movie of the Green Lantern. You've seen him in movies like Inglorious Bastards, seeing his videos on Funnier Die. Please welcome Paul Rust. Hey. Hey, hello everybody. Hi, Paul. Hi, hi, hi, hi. So, we all saw this movie last night.

If you don't know anything about Green Lantern, basically, there's an airline pilot or jet fighter, gets a ring from an alien, and then he becomes a space cop. I mean, that's like if that's the basic gist of it, right? Yeah. But man, I was confused for a moment one. I am familiar with this comic book and I was confused. I was like, what the fuck is happening? So in the comic book, is he not a pilot or? He is a pilot.

But the opening monologue was like, in the year 2005, there was 149 planets. Everyone was divided into 3,000 sectors. Each sector has two guards. That was almost like comically long. I mean, that was like a total. 10 minute monhole. And it was so dense and so confusing. Oh, it's like if somebody who was a fan of the comic books,

like sat you down with their onion breath and talked out for like 10 minutes about what they liked about the comics. And no images to really, like, there was nothing visually engaging. Why would there be? It's not a visual medium. Wait, oh, wait, it is.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It was like a bad planetarium show that made no sense. You're going through the universe and it's like you're not seeing anything cool or funny. You're just hearing an information download and it's just a lot of numbers

it's it was that part it started so instantaneously terrible wow turn our cell phones up that was the United Talent Agency sorry you guys it's not a big deal

we know that you're talking about Green Lantern cease and desist but this movie takes place in sector 2318 we know which is one of the planets that Earth is in

One of the thousands of planet. That's like saying 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. We just know the White House. Everyone knows 2318. Everyone knows what sector earth is in, guys. And let's talk about the main villain of this movie is a cloud that looks like a rejected villain from the mummy. It's a mummy ride. It is a cloud with teeth.

It is a cloud with teeth that does no chewing. It sucks people's souls out. So why give it teeth? And it sucks people's ghost skeletons. That was really bothering me. He sucks their soul out. And then a skeleton is also sucked out as if a skeleton has a ghost too. It makes no sense to me.

He eats the souls. He eats people's fear. It was getting really heady, though, too, because it was like he eats people's fear, but he is fear. Yeah. But he is your fear and my fear. And if you have fear, it's attractive to him. What? He feasts on your fear.

And he was in the lost quadrant, but he's coming back. So first of all, the mayor, will we meet the guys? I fucking hated this movie. Yeah. Tell me as a fan of the Green Lantern is... Are you a fan of the Green Lantern? I'm a comic book fan. Green Lantern, I know not super well.

It's not one of my, like, I love books. What did you know going in? I knew, like, I know the story of Hal Jordan and getting the ring, and, you know, like, that general, like, origin story, there's a great kind of comic, a couple of books that detail that kind of series of events that are pretty amazing. But it does not involve going to, like, Oa the Living Planet

and, like, meeting. Which is where all the lanterns hang out. Yes, exactly. Looks like the worst Star Wars universe. It's like one of the rejected cities from Phantom Menace. It's like just, it's like, just a lot. poles and nothing that makes a spider, like, a spider of like buildings.

It looks so inconceivable and weird. This was some of the worst, like, green screen garbage. Oh, yeah, they didn't, like, whatever. This is a little too critical, but they, like, didn't, like, live in the actual space. It would just sort of them be in a platform and in the background were other things.

Yeah, they were always on the most bland plank. Yeah. And then there's crazy shit going on. Mortal combat. It was like the study for a moral... of it. It was like a shitty video game or you're right. Pauli literally felt like

the worst of the Star Wars prequels. It was like someone's like CGI is real good. We'll put a lot of CGI in the end. People will really like it. And they'll be able to fly and they'll create like guns and shit and like when the rings are activated they can like think of

like you could create like a brick wall. Yeah. And that was the other thing. The Green Lantern whatever he thinks of he can create. He created the most boring things. And like old-timey thing. Yeah. That's the other thing too. It's like supposed to be taking place in modern day times, but it just felt so...

The Greenland... He creates a race car that looks like something out of like a picture of like Lamonts or something. How fucked up was that scene where the helicopter is going to crash for like 45 seconds? The helicopter is like spinning five feet of rough ground about to crash. Basically, this is a critical moment in the movie because Hal Jordan gets to ring decides he doesn't want it. And there is a party going on. And who is it, who is it, Tim Robbins? Yeah.

Tim Robbins, who's playing Peter Sarsgaard's father. And if those two people aren't the exact same age, I don't understand. Peter Sarsgaard is supposed to have, like, come up with Ryan Reynolds and Blake Glyveli. Like, they're all supposed to be like of the same age. And their age is clearly, to me, Blake Lively is what, early 20s? She's like 18 years old. She's a gossip girl. She's on gossip girl.

And like, Peter Sarsgarde, I think, is 52. Yeah. Tim Robbins had it when he was 10 years old. No sort of sense. I was like, what the fuck? So the helicopter is going down because the villain shoots a beer out of like a beer? A beer tap. He rigs it so it shoots up, hits one of the helicopter things.

The helicopter's out of control at this very small party. Well, because Peter Starsigard can also... Well, actually, this is a question. I want to post it to my fellow lanterns. Okay. Okay. Was Peter Sargegard able to actually listen to what other people were thinking? Or was it his fear that they were thinking negative thoughts?

Oh, wow. No, no, no. He could hear it. He could actually hear their negative thoughts. And he had like telekinesis. He plays Hector Hammond, who is kind of poisoned by an alien, and he gets superpowers, kind of like the Green Lantern. Here's my problem with that Hector Hamming character. He can read people's thoughts, but then when he hits on Blake lively, she's clearly.

clearly creeped out by him, but he's not reading any of her thoughts like, ooh, you're creepy, you're creepy, but meanwhile, everyone else is like, you idiot, you stupid head, you freak, I know what you're thinking about me. Even when talking to her, he's an extreme form of self-denial. He won't even listen to what she's saying.

Did anybody else have a problem with, both him and Ryan Reynolds would vacillate between these insane set pieces where they would be like, poisoned by aliens or given alien powers, go to alien planets, and then they would just go home? Yes, I was upset them. Everybody, like, Hector Hammond, like, crashes the helicopter.

He's, like, an evil genius. He can read people's thoughts. Like, he's trying to destroy the world. And then he just goes home and lies in bed. Goes back to... They needed to decompress. Why does everybody go home? Hector Hammond kills his father, brutalizes Angela Bassett,

destroys a science facility, goes home. And guess what? So does Hale Jordan. They go home. They need to crash. The villain and enemy, or the villain and the hero, both go back to their apartment. They both know all the time.

They go to their apartments all the time. That's why the piece of the movie felt so strange. It was so weird. There were oftentimes where I would be looking at shots and just thinking like, what is this shit I'm looking at? Honestly, that question, what is this shit I'm looking at? Popped in my brain like 15 to 20. Because there would just be shots of two people like floating across the sky and landing.

And you'd be like, why am I watching this shit? Okay, well, we haven't even talked about the love relationship between Ryan Reynolds and Blake lively. I have a clip that I'd like to play that kind of shows you the dialogue. In my mind, the dialogue feels like it was written by an 11-year-old, so here you go. Hey, Carol. It's going to maybe do a little flying today. What do you think? I think you're linked.

Yes, but that's only because I slept in. I used to sleep in. Then I turned 11. Let me give you a little heads up. I've gone up against these sabres all week, and they have smoked me every time. There isn't anything you can do that they can't do better, faster, and without disappointing women everywhere. I think we both know that's not true This is exactly why I didn't want me for this

My father did I would have gone with Jensen I'd have gone with Jensen too But unfortunately he's busy Not being good enough At least he shows up How This test today

It's important I got it I'm gonna make you look good up there I'm worried okay now let's get these pants off And fly some planes So my question to you Jason is Was the Hal Jordan in the comics As much of a quipster

Well, yeah, I mean, like, that relationship is actually kind of awesome in the, in the, in the, I'm talking, the, I'm talking, the Darwin Cook comic book that I'm thinking of is pretty fantastic. Right. The relationship between those two people. Does she, anybody else feel like she is constantly trying to talk like a man? Well, I love, too, that her whole, like, point of view is that she is not only a pilot, but also a business person. and that you could just be a pilot, but you need to be a pilot and a business person. It's like, do you?

I don't know that you do. By the way, she works for an airplane facility called Ferris Airplanes, and it seems like the news is constantly covering what is going on. It's like there was a crash during a test flight. The news are right on the scene. The news is reporting like, there's a party at Ferris Airlines. It's like what kind of local news is covering this weird aeronautics company in the middle of nowhere.

And they only build jets for the government, so they would, of course, allow maximum media access at all times, right? Two, they were building the most advanced drone of all time. And what I, you know, not only was Ryan Reynolds a quipster, but I felt like everyone was quipping. Everyone had us thing. Well, June was saying this movie felt dated. I felt like it felt dated like 1996, like the amount of like sort of ironic detachment.

and everybody had to like, it felt like a scream movie or something. I wanted one person through the entire movie just to be like, hey, I care about what's going on here. He finds a dead alien. He's sucked away by a green ball of light 100 miles to find a dead alien in the field. He's like, okay, purple alien.

Weird. You know, what the fuck? Don't worry, man. We're going to get you to a hospital that has purple blood. Love it. Love it. Best line.

What about when they danced to that song? Dumboovie. Oh, gun, subpar. The worst, though, was when they talked about having flown together. Oh, yeah. Did you understand what that meant? No. They had sex.

Flying was a metaphor for sex shoes. They had sex while they were flying. Their two planes were flying together, and they were all seven days. We flew together, and then you flew together. and then you flew with a lot of other people. Whatever happened to that girl who was in the bed in the beginning of the first scene, when they cut to her...

When they cut to her, her face is so funny. Just like bright-eyed, like... I would love to make a movie that's just about that woman leaving what the rest of her day was like. He never called her back. I want that woman and the woman in Iron Man that Tony Stark had sex with in the beginning just to just have like these lives.

I was like, that's such at these guys. Those poor women at the beginning of every movie who have to be the guy's beginning art point. They're like the same as like when a guy goes out and he's got parking tickets all over his windshield. He's like, oh, this guy's got to get his life. Well, they totally overdidded with him like driving recklessly.

Like he could park in parking spots. He just chose not to. He's driving so recklessly to make this late test flight and he's wrapping a gift at the same time, which I realized later, he didn't need to wrap that gift because the party was way later in the day.

Because, like, the party was... He wasn't headed there. He's not a procrastinator. He's just, he rushes things. He's wrapping a gift with no hand,

he's not driving with any hands, speeding around cars. Yeah. That was the worst opening. I don't know if this was in the comic book, Jason, but that scene where they flashed back to the dad.

No, I don't... That wasn't in the college. I don't remember that. So, the dad survived the crash and they made eye contact and then the plane blew up. Terrible.

That was so. We both gassed. We were sitting there. We both gassed. I love that that's what you think was brutal. You didn't think the dad throwing young Hald Jordan his leather coat and saying, keep it warm for me was brutal because that was the worst. Keep it warm for me.

I thought not enough foreshadowing that that dad was going to die. Hal Jordan is in a spin. He's going down. He goes into his intense flashback where he, and now I didn't even understand what that meant. Like, why did he, like, so they were trying to say, like, he was afraid, he was freezing, he was having a flashback, that's why he froze. Yeah, he was, he let fear in, man. Yeah, he let fear. His fear was of his dad who blew up in us.

Well, fear, I guess he was scared that he'd turn out the same one. I guess so, guys. This movie did become, like, a self-help book by the end of it. Every character had major daddy issues. Embrace your green. Yeah, it was all about will and fear and daddy didn't love me and daddy doesn't like me and wha-wha-wha-w. I don't have a daddy. But just the explosion, like, when that happened, like, I maybe sound a little too old foggyish.

But, like, our movie's just like they're so brutal in their, like, attempts to surprise you in these. Even, like, a comic book movie, like, that's for kids, like the Green Lantern. You're constantly seeing, like, fathers explode before their child's eyes. Yes, while they're locked in, like, intense eye contact with them. I was like, oh, my God. It looks like the dad's going to survive. That's what was so upsetting. And then the kid is running to the plane and the dad, yeah, makes eye contact with him and then explodes.

It's horrible. I had the same experience in Transformers 3 where the robots, instead of just fighting, rip each other's neck and spine out. Their robot neck and spine. It's like, you don't need to do that. Like, this is a movie for children. Wait, they have a rip off their head and spine. Why do they have robotic analogs to our biological? Why do they have spines?

Robots do not have spines. I also was like, where is it? the moms in this world. In the Transformer world? Well, no. There was one... The one mom, when Hal Jordan was wrapping that gift for his nephew, who we never saw again. And who were all those men there?

His brothers? There was like five different men in his age there. Those men were like, you crashed that plane, you have to live so dangerously, Hal. What, are you trying to be just like him so much that you want to die in a plane crash, Hal? Oh. You know what, John? You know what, John? Why don't you relax, John?

I'm going to go see my nephew, and his nephew's in bed crying on his birthday. Because he's scared for his uncle, hell. I love those, like, one-off characters. Like, that nephew's only there to function, so we don't think this Ryan Reynolds character is, like, a huge asshole. Yeah. Oh, he gave a piece of shit to his nephew, but then he never comes back.

He gives the worst thing. He's like, he gave his nephew a birthday gift. He kid opens it. It's like a little airplane. He goes, what's this? A starfighter? No, it's a fucking airplane, dummy. A pilot, this, like, grown man, a pilot is giving a plane to his nephew.

It's like, so. apparently this gift is all about you. Yeah. And like your job and you're reminding your nephew what your job is. And then he goes over to the nephew's room, takes down a plane that is hanging. Looks exactly like it. And replaces it with an identical one.

Like, take down your shitty one. This is the better one. And then he leaves. He doesn't even hang out of the fight. He's gone. He's out of there. I also love that the nerd that worked at the airplane place was only a nerd because of those glasses.

Like, he's a good-looking guy. And the best part, Paul Willow so hard at this. When Ryan Reynolds turns into the green lantern in front of him. For the first time, he has that transformation. He just yells out, green! Green!

That's what he has to go. Green! Was that not the craziest, weirdest sex scene? Where he's like, show me. Yes, show it to me. The nerd guy is like, show it to me. You got to show me. And he's like, okay, you want to see this?

It was like total... It was very strange. All of the dialogue. I'm not ready. The dialogue might as well have been like, and then he's like, and then he's like, like Ryan Reynolds poses, like stands up in front of me in like a tanked up of sweatpants and just posing like he's going to turn into the Green Lantern. And the guy's just watching from the couch.

It is the pervious, super weirdest thing. I also had an issue with those sweatpants he was wearing for some reason. Me too. They were strangely obscene. I know you're not a hero right there in that moment. Put on some slack. And he's put on those sweatspants. My favorite line, I think from that,

scene is, dude, you're a superhero. Yeah. Don't they always get the girl? Yeah. The guy says, don't they always get the girl? Can I say that after we went to this, I think we saw it around 8, I came back later for a midnight screening and I got mixed up

and because I thought I hadn't left, I walked back into the same green lantern screening and when I walked in it was the line, don't they usually get the girls like, oh, terrible. And that was the exit line. Twice in a day I have to hear this line. And that was the exit line of that scene.

It was like, don't they always get the girl? Next scene. Yeah. Okay. Oh, so at one point, Hal Jordan is making, like, he's making amends with Blake lively. And he makes her her necklace. He's like, I can do things like this. And she gets like a little Green Lantern necklace.

That's the worst gift because won't that just immediately disappear? And it does. At the end of the scene, it's gone. So, like, he could give her a gift for a second. She goes like, happy birthday. I'm sorry I forgot. That's like the head of. like, you know, Chrysler, giving a Chrysler to his wife.

You're like, oh, thanks, this thing that you have easy access to. But also, it would be like having a Chrysler and then getting in it and driving off in it and going, this is yours. I'll see you later. You'll never drive this guy. It comes with me. Yeah. I travel in this. They fought about the same issue, broke up and got back together like 10 times in this movie.

That was kind of the whole problem with the movie, right? It was like, scenes would address the problem, and then they'd go back home, and then they'd think about like, wait, that didn't really get really. They'd lie down for a little while. Maybe I should go back to O. with a living planet and talk to those guys. I will tell you that no matter what, through it all, Blake lively thought his jokes were really funny. Well, they were.

You know, that was her genuinely breaking and saying. I'm going to ask a question, though. I was confused about how we're using the word lanterns because there was an actual lantern, but then also people were referred to as lanterns. Yes. So he was a lantern. Yes.

It seemed like the lantern was not. No one carried the lanterns with them. They all seem to leave the Atlanta. Well, we only know from Hal Jordan. He left that lantern in his apartment and occasionally he would need to recharge. But not during any of the giant fight scenes. He never needed to recharge. Just when he was showing off in front of friends.

Right. Oh, that's right. So that means all those people have lanterns back at their house? I guess. Like power stations. They do. Okay. So that's a thing.

So they never carry the lanterns with them when they're out. It's so old-timey too. It is so. Isn't that such a weird? And if they went out, is there like a sort of, of coat check room for lanterns so you don't have to carry them around out into clubs. Well, when they were all on the planet,

they go to the planet and they all have this little speech. It makes a Matrix Revolution speech kind of like pale and cabare. So it's like, you know, this Sanestro is standing on this big platform that is also just a big lantern signal. And he's like, we are the best.

We all lanterns! And then everyone shoots their ring lights up. And they're all shooting. And then they cut to an exterior of the planet. And this is my big problem with that moment. You look at the planet, you're seeing a circle, and light is shooting out of four different parts. I know, yes.

I knew you're going to say this. So my question is, are there four separate meetings that are going on where that's happening? Because it should only be out of one center area. I was like, what are those side meetings going on? Why couldn't they get there? Didn't they cornered it? They're on screens. They're watching Sinestro on a screen. Paper view.

It was so bizarre. It makes no sense. They all shoot it up. and then you see the planet. It's like four. Yeah. Maybe it was like WrestleMania three when they had it in five different cities across America.

And then when they go to OWA, of course, even though they're aliens and they're fish people and rock people and fly people, some of them have the black voice. There is the black guy character. Oh, really? There's a black guy here? Great.

Oh, black people are rock people. Okay, I got it. Yep, got it. Tough, tough looking alien is the black guy. Hey, but guys, remember he helped our white guy. character though so it was okay he taught him how to fight and when he did and he first gets brought to oa he is floating naked except for a very small underwear it was so weird like he gets brought to oha fully clothed yeah then they rip off all of his clothes but they leave like a swatch of underwear on

yeah just some briefs yeah my mom was always hilarious growing up we'd watch a scene where like um you know a couple would get it's an action movie and a couple gets dumped out of a boat or something into the water. She would always complain about how the women had to get down in their underwear, but we never got to see the men in their underwear. We need your mom. We need your mom on this podcast. She is a huge van Wilder fans. I do want to talk back to this because we really didn't even do justice to the helicopter

scene, which is the helicopter scene is insane. So basically, Hal Jordan rejects the lanterns and then this helicopter is about the crash. Why does he quit? why did he quit and when he quits nobody's like he will give us the fucking most powerful ring back and our lantern please he's like I quit and I get to keep all this power

yeah yeah right cool no one no one comes to collect him no one yeah you know it's so he decides that he's gonna get back in when the helicopter's crashing and his solution for stopping a helicopter from crashing

is to form a car around the helicopter chassis and then create a racetrack in circles all around the party. So the helicopter is racing on a car. And what would you propose? I mean, you guys just... A trampoline.

But it was my favorite part of the whole movie. It was actually my favorite. With that helicopter car, without that race track, I had a huge smile on my face. And the car was, like, jumping because you could create some of the tracks. It was like a hot rod. Yeah. It was like, I was like, why not just create the helicopter onto the floor? Or to the ground rather.

Just make a floor. Just make a landing pad up there. Create a balloon, like a pillow for it to land on. Could you make a floor? Oh, my God. Excuse me, Green Lantern. Can you make a floor? But then there was like other things he would make that were so abstract.

Like when Blake lively was about to get, I think, hit by the helicopter. Yeah. He just put her in like a blob of goo. Green goo. Green goo. And by the way, the superhero fucking like comes out for the first time in front of a handful of people that he knows. That would be like me coming to you.

Like hell George. Oh, there's no difference. Exactly. The weird thing, though, is like she calls that out later on. And this is what you're saying about like. Right, but she's also seen him before too. But everyone at that party did. Tim Robbins has seen him.

Everybody. He looked exactly like howl Jordan. I was like, fuck you. Blake Lively does call it out. Like, what do you think? I don't recognize it because your cheekbones are covered up. But so everyone at that party, he's the star pilot of this aeronautics facility. the small party

where they thank him from the stage. Like, and Hal Jordan's here. All eyes were on him at one point during that night. They should know what he looks at. I got to say the local press,

although they're covering everything else, doesn't cover the Green Lantern. No. No. They never covered the Green Lantern. They cover the airplane crash, but they don't cover superheroes arriving on Earth.

Well, hey guys, the news media spends their whole time talking about Anthony Weiner and there's a... All right. And there's job loss. Yeah. Job loss that all.

They're not talking about that. There you go. My indictment as if like a news network today, if there was a superhero, they wouldn't report on this. Obviously they would. I would just go to me. I was only hope. There was a moment in this movie where Hal Jordan is explaining, he's appealing to the council of elders, which are just men with big heads and giant robe. They're on top of these like 200-foot obelisks or that.

Oh. And when he goes in and he, like, he like, tells them off. And he's been in this like Green Lantern Council for a week now. And those guys have been there for eons. Like you're supposed to believe like billions. Yeah. They've always been.

And then he comes in and starts telling him like it is. I'm like, he goes, we have a saying on earth. Yeah. We're only human. I wanted him to play the Billy Joel song at that point. I want to know that way. My life? No.

That'd be good. The Don Easter Alexa? Oh, man. And he, that, like... Oh, but that would be like the equivalent of, like, if you worked out a company for a week and then you just like barged into the board of directors meeting. And we're like, let me tell you how to run this company. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Now, Jason, I know you walked out during this movie. I did. I walked out... Is this your first? How did this get made that you... That I walked out on? You couldn't finish? I think you walked out of something else, too. I did walk out of something else.

I can't remember what it was, though. There was something else I didn't finish. I just wanted to know if it was so terrible. Oh, I think, uh, the, the, uh, the, the, uh, the same thing. Andrew Bullock movie. I don't think you finished. Oh, all about Steve. I did not finish all about Steve. So if Ryan Reynolds... It is Ryan Reynolds.

Oh, no. But if two people have exchanged fluids, you can't watch... Can't deal with it. The smoke monster, the whatever, the angry cloud, parallax, eats an entire city. No one seems phased by that after the conclusion of the... Basically how

Jordan throws the cloud into the sun. Case closed. Movies over. But yet he ate an entire city. By the way, I don't even know what city. They didn't really ever label the city. Never label. It was a city that had swamps and also had a downtown. I was imagining when those people were running away

for the smoke about Sarah, they were screaming, What city is this? Why am I? Identify where we are. And they all get eaten. Everyone's like totally fine with that. And did also, did this movie look like it was shot on like soap opera sets? Yes. Like every

scene was so flat. Completely. Like all of the, like, Blake Lively's office, his apartment, SARS Guard's apartment, it all looked like shitty sets from a TV show. They're like great news, guys. We have a couple of extra sets that Grey's Anatomy isn't working. He isn't using this week. We can shoot our scenes there.

And days. Days of our lives is dead 80 to coming in. The last line of the movie, pretty great. Last line for a superhero movie. What are you going to do? I'm going to look for trouble. I'm going to look for some. trouble. After and she goes, what are

going to do? Save a cat in downtown Milky Way? I got a new job. That's me. I got to do a lot of traveling though. You're just like egg-rate all of us right now. It's such a stupid, stupid character.

He's the worst. And he's much better. The character's much better in the... Yeah, he's like a really... What's his motivation though to like save things? Because that I thought was a big problem in the movie. Like, I didn't know is he looking for trouble? Does he genuinely want to help people?

I don't read Green Lantern now. And now it's like mired in a lot of this Green Lantern core. Yeah. Kind of like all these other lanterns. There's good lanterns and bad land. It's like a very dense book now. Like my familiarity with it is from years ago. So I don't know.

But no, that was the problem for me. His great dilemma in this was like, I guess Blake Lively sort of put it where she was like, just makes me so sad. you've been given so much and you haven't used any of it. And I'm like, that's who I'm supposed to care about. Like that'd be like a rich kid

who doesn't know what to invest in. Yeah. A rich kid who's... What frat to join? Just kind of angry. He joined a frat and that he didn't like their rules. Yes. So he left for a few days.

It's Van Wilder. Wait, are you? Van Wilder. National Ampoens Green Lantern. Um... I also want to say that like... The suit looks terrible. Suit is all CGI.

All of the CGI looked terrible. It was a fucking awful looking. It's a metaphor for the movie, right? There's nothing to hold on to the whole time. You are a lantern and you also hold a lantern. Correct. Okay, got it.

And lanterns can easily be killed too or they can't. I didn't find any power. The lantern, if you shoot a lantern, if he doesn't deflect it, he'll die. Correct. I mean, that's okay. That's bullshit too. We asked this question last night. So, Jason, how much?

The movie cost $200. million dollars. Okay. How much has it made worldwide do you think? 200 million. And they've greenlit a sequel. Yeah, I think it's made close to 100 million. You're right. You're 139 million. But that's not a lot.

Not so green lantern. That's worldwide. This movie is a failure and the greenlandland sequel. Now, what you missed at the end was the post-credit sequence. Oh, yeah, I didn't see this. Do you want to know? You're going back to see it. Well, I'll see it again, of course. Of course.

What happens is... Because my Green Lantern Corps and I, I'm part of a Green Lantern Corps. And we're all going together. I'm going to Sinestro. Sinestro, the whole movie is a good. He's the main guy. Mark Strong. And all the actors in this are pretty great, like across the board.

Not in this movie and other things that they have done. Great. Sinestro is the whole time as a good guy, like really funny guy, like awesome. Not funny. He's not really nice guy. Arguably funny. Yeah, arguably funny. And, you know, he's basically at the end of the movie, he's like, hey, he saves

Ryan Reynolds at the end. He's like, you know what? You're impulsive. You're crazy. Just like Abin-Sir, the guy who gave him the ring. It's basically him going like, I was arbitrarily mean to you at the beginning. Now I'm going to be arbitrarily nice to you. And then he walks off.

And then the post-credit scene is he puts on the evil ring. He becomes evil. Yeah. It's such a... You know that from the books? Yeah, Sinestro is a bad guy. He is? I mean, like, that's part of...

That's part of it. Bo. Can I ask one more question? Yes. How did Peter Sarasgard get, like, if that other guy was a green lantern, why did he have any fear in him or yellow stuff in him? The fear that Parallax had shot him with. Remember, Tina Turner. So that wasn't his own fear.

Tina Turner says we found a different alien blood in the body of that. And you've been exposed. I see. I didn't like any of this. And then he smashed her face into glass. So bad, and she's stuck on it. She's stuck on that glass. That's an amazing actor.

Angela Beck. Why was she doing that? Everyone, Tim Robbins, Peter Sars starred. Those superhero movies now are like the last vestige for actors who were like respected 20. Because I think it's a mutually beneficial relationship where superhero movies they get prestige. Yeah, it's like, oh, I buy into this because Tim Robbins is doing something. And I think that all of them do it and they say it because they don't know what they're saying. So it's like, some kids will buy this bullshit.

Like, you know, it's sort of like why like, like, you know, like Sean Connery, uh, Well, when he did a league of extraordinary gentlemen, like, yeah, yeah, these dummies will eat this up. No, it's still, it's a shitty movie. Like, you're not going to assume. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, in the movie, the Green Lantern has a little poem that he has to say to get him in. So this is the poem in the movie.

The brightest day. In blackest night, no evil shall escape my side. Let those who worship evil's life. Beware of my house. That is the poem. I just want to say. Yes. I just, I have to say it's not a poem. It's an oath. Okay.

Just for the nerds in the audience. Sorry. Pat Bear is listening and he's out there going insane, losing his mind that you've called it a poem and not an oath. Well, what I did. It's a manly poem. That's what an oath is. In our mini episode, we asked you to come up with your own oath. So let's hear your best selections.

This one is from Katie Dupree In cliche-ridden dialogue In sequel-threatening epilogue Beware the mind-cripling abyss That sucks you in when watching this That's that, sir And here's the next one you see all the circled one This is from Blake Hunt

Roses are red Green Lanterns are not During this movie, I ask To be shot Okay This one's from Ed Cole There once was a movie that bore It was of the Green Lantern core.

It had CG effects that were bad and a ridiculous Hot Wheels ad. Oh, I'm sorry. And a ridiculous Hot Wheels ad, I hope they don't make any more. All right, and here's the final one. I didn't do a great job reading that. From Jay Kane.

It's cold read. Right, that's the one I'm doing, Jay Cane. No matinee nor movie night. No price is worth this site. Let those who tell me the Green Lantern was tight, beware the power of my incoming right. Pretty good. These are good poems. There's a good selection.

That's a good Shakespeare. That was the most creative of the submissions. As always, you can follow myself on Twitter. I'm at Paul Scheer. Paul, where do you at? I'm at Paul Rust. At Miss June, Diane. Jason, still not on Twitter.

Not on Twitter. But you want to plug anybody? I will continue to plug Bob Dukas Twitter. Bob Dukas, really good. And coming up next week on Adult Swim following Children's Hospital, A show that Jason is a producer on and has been on and written on is a show that June and I are in, and it's called NTSF S-D-S-U-V. Yeah.

So check that out, July 21st, 1215 p.m. right after Children's Hospital. A lot of crazy, good guests on there. So we'll see you next time on How Did This Get Made?